#just look at the notes if you wanna know what im up to with this
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luvyeni · 3 days ago
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🍃… ( reaction ) taking your ring off prank ̨ ! ୨୧ 一 라이즈 ՞
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⸃ ⸰ ⌁  taking your engagement ring off as prankヾ
OT7!라이즈・ fem!reader ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ g ・ fluff ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ cw ・ ‎ wc ・ ‎k ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎| ‎ ‎click to library
request. hi, can you do the reactions of riize when reader prank them by not wearing their engagement ring …
「 ୨୧ authors note 」 this was cute i hope you like it <3 !!!
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﹙ 𐙚 : shotaro ﹚ .ᐟ
he notices it , but he doesn’t say anything. “hey baby.” you gave him a kiss , sitting down next to him. “hi.” he says, eyes going immediately to your hand, noticing your ring wasn’t on your finger. he thought you probably lost it in the couch since it’s happened before. so he wastes no time, getting up and checking in between the cushions quietly. turning to your phone which you hidden confused, then turning back to him. “taro my love what are you doing.” his shiny eyes and warm smile making your heart flutter. “im trying to find your ring baby , i know you probably lost it in the cushions.” he was so cute , you couldn’t help but swoon. “oh don’t bother.” you fold immediately. “it was a joke.” you took the ring from your pocket. “ah why!” he whined, cheeks red. “don’t do that again.” he took the ring from your hand , putting it back on your finger.
“keep it on , it looks pretty there.”
﹙ 𐙚 : eunseok ﹚ .ᐟ
his ass don’t care, you already said yes. you’re gonna marry him regardless if you wear the ring or not; HOWEVER , he paid thousands of dollars for that ring , it’s not about to collect dust now. “i see the camera.” he said pointing , pissing you off. “I hate you.” you snatch your phone up. “why can you ever go along with something?” you pout , he can’t but think that you’re so cute. “baby that ring i bought for you , i don’t care if you wear it or not.” he shrugged , kissing your lips. “how can you say that?” he smirked.
“because you’re gonna marry me regardless , you already said yes, that’s all i need.”
﹙ 𐙚 : sungchan ﹚ .ᐟ
his ass won’t notice that it’s missing , so you have to take it off right in front of him. “what do you want to eat?” both of you sitting in the car. “i don’t know.” you fiddled with the ring , looking at the camera with a smirk, because you know he’s gonna look at you which gives you a perfect chance. “are you jo…” he stops seeing you take the ring off , sitting it in the cup holder. “what is it?” he just blinks at you. “sungchan.” you bite back a smile. “what are you doing?” he said, looking at your hand , then to you. he will pull the entire car over. “put it back on.” he said. “now.” you smile at him. “this is a joke isn’t it , you’re prancing me?” you point to the camera , he rolls his eyes , driving off again.
“im gonna super glue it to your finger, keep your ring on.”
﹙ 𐙚 : wonbin ﹚ .ᐟ
you can not trick him, he saw you set up the camera, he knows the ring is in your pocket. he scoffs as you go on with your day. “why are you making so much noise.” you try not to laugh at his sassy ass attitude. “you wanna take your ring off?” he said , reaching for his. “fine let’s take them off.” he said trying to slide it off his finger , but you stopped him. “don’t do that.” you slapped his hand. “then put yours on , now.” you took the ring out , sliding it back on your fingers. “see now get your hand away from your hand.” you want to slap that stupid smirk off his face.
“don’t take it off anymore.”
﹙ 𐙚 : seunghan ﹚ .ᐟ
he just thinks it needs to be cleaned or something, do it doesn’t real bother him. “baby where’s your ring?” he asks , you look at the camera without his knowledge. “im gonna take it to the cleaners today.” mind you he’s done this already. “you need it cleaned right , that’s why you took it off right?” he gets up from the couch. “it’s probably in the room then.” you stop him before he goes into the room. “hannie you’re so cute.” you pulled him back down on the couch. “what do you mean princess?” you point to the camera. “it’s a joke hannie , it’s in my pocket , i just wanted to see your reaction.” he smiles when you pull it out your pocket. “see.” taking it out your hand , sliding it back on your finger.
“just like the first time i proposed to you , beautiful.”
﹙ 𐙚 : sohee ﹚ .ᐟ
don’t do him like this; he’ll automatically think you want to end the engagement… of course you don’t , but in his mind he’s like; if you didn’t want to break up , why take it off? do you hate him? oh he’s going crazy. “baby.” you hear the quiver in his voice. “baby where’s your ring?” he pouted. “you’re not supposed to take it off.” he whined. “I didn’t notice.” his eyes widen at your words. “what do you mean!” he said. “you’re supposed to wear it 24/7, you have to show it off.” you laugh at his child-like behavior. “don’t laugh.” he said. “it’s just a prank baby , the ring is in my pocket.”
“then put it on and don’t take it off again.”
﹙ 𐙚 : anton ﹚ .ᐟ
6 million things go through his mind all at once; did he do something wrong? were you mad at him? how does he fix this without pissing you off even more? “baby?” he said softly, you forced down a laugh. “yeah ton?” this confused him even more, you called him by his nickname so you couldn’t be upset. “ton what is it?” you broke the boy out of his thoughts. “you aren’t mad at me right?” he said. “did you do something to make me mad?” he’s like please answer the question. “your ring.” he said. “you took it off, are you mad?” he didn’t even see the camera. “im sorry if you are.” you actually started to feel bad , you pouted. “im sorry ton it was a joke i didn't mean to upset you.” you pointed to the camera. he stared into the camera , before giving you shy smile, looking away. “don’t do that again.” he said, covering his face.
“please put it back on now.”
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©️LUVYENI
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venuslarkspur · 22 hours ago
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Teen Hero Shenanigans
Part 2
We Were Written In The Stars, Boyfriend Of Mine.
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Summary: Your Damian’s Twin Sister, after arriving 3 years after your brother, you never excepted to take the Robin mantle, until your brother runs away and you volunteer to take his place. Damian eventually returns and you are discharged from the role, after bottling up your anger you decide to go solo by running away and stealing the Batgirl. But you’re not alone, your sort of boyfriend joins you. The main problem is the boyfriend in question is your brother’s best friend, Jon Kent.
Pairing: Jon Kent x Batsis!Reader on this one. Mentions of platonic batfam and reader.
Notes: Sorry this took so long and it’s shorts I have an exam in 2 days 😢 - ONLY HALF PROOF-READ IM SORRY. Just pure Jon and Reader today
Warnings: Mentions of past child abuse, vomiting, derogatory language, cuts and bruises. Reader has some childhood ptsd.
Words: 1.6k
This morning was significantly quiet, sitting on the windowsill of what was your new home you hadn’t heard a scream in the last 12 hours, no petty purse snatching in sight. There were some clouds in the sky, it was never this nice in Gotham, too much pollution. But the harsh breeze against your skin reminded you of what life was like in the mountains training with your grandfather, it really made you think of how ironic it was that you always got Damian’s sloppy seconds. First being heir of the league of assassins, then being Robin, but now you have something that’s yours; the sleeping boy in the bed across from you. Even though he was technically Damian’s first, he doesn’t get to see him this way.
You dabbed your wounds again and let out a disgruntled noise upon hitting a bruise, you grabbed some honey and dabbed it on the dried up cut. You had gotten into a confrontation last night and you weren’t expecting for the low level thug to have some backup. Long story short, he had a ridiculously big group of goons and Jon had to come and help. Let’s hope they all had health insurance for the beating you both gave them. But you couldn’t lie, without your father or siblings there you felt like a rogue, even when you were fighting crime with Jason you never felt this out of place. You felt like you would relapse at any moment and forget your new ways. You never took pleasure in killing, it’s just how your grandfather taught you. Nobody taught you about redemption, you were just explained the world in black and white.
Luckily, you had Jon if you ever nearly slip up. You hadn’t looked at your phone in 3 good days and you had been happy that way, you missed them, even your father to an extent but you also knew proving yourself was important. The highlight of all of this was Jon, sure breaking a few scum noses was nice too. But nothing beats the adrenaline of going on patrol together and the press wondering when you two became an item, you leave as quickly as possible though; you can’t risk your family coming to get you or Jon’s for that matter. It was a bit easier for Jon, his parents trusts him and loves him. Your family loves you too, but if Bruce trusted you then why fire you?
“Ouch.” You murmur after hitting a particularly sensitive bruise, deciding that’s enough and wanting to spend some more time with Jon before your patrol, you slip back next to him; ruffling his hair and trying to shuffle as close as humanely possible, the more you shuffled the more healed you felt by the moment, not just physically but mentally as well. There was so many things to tell him, about your overbearing mother? Or maybe almost being disowned by your grandfather? But you didn’t wanna tell him things he wouldn’t know what to do with. So you embrace him and he gets the message and pulls your waist around him, which made you hope the morning would never end.
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“I received a call from Clark this morning.” Bruce said sternly to almost all his children, they all sat on the couch, “Clark? has he found her?” Stephanie spoke up first, her eyes widened with hope as Barbara placed a hand on her shoulder. “Steph..” she said whilst rubbing her back to comfort her. “Well, what did he say?” Barbara asked, Bruce let out a sigh and faced his kids.
“You all remember Jon right?” They all nodded in unison and mutual confusion, “Well, recently Jon has gone off too, they think around the same time as your sister.”
“What are you saying?”
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“You okay?” Jon asked as you searched the knocked out drug dealer in front of you. “Absolutely nothing, no leads.” You replied, you’ve been trying to find the boss of a local drug cartel but you’ve had no luck. “Babe, I was asking about you.” He looked down at his shoes before moving over to you. His glowing features making you forget about the filthy, rat infested alley. “Ups and downs, some days I really miss my family.” You look down and don’t realise the thug under you has woken up and has now broken out of his restraints. “I’ll get you for this you slu-“ he lunges at you seething with anger; but you swiftly move out of the way and restrain his hands before Jon hastily pins him to the ground again, using his weight against him. “You brats..” you role your eyes and gesture Jon to walk away with you, and you nearly did until for the first time you lost sense of self.
“You fucking cunt! Look at me!” The thugs screams and you pull Jon along, nothing he can say to you can do anything, you’ve heard it all, well until he reopened some old wounds; emotional wounds. “You are nothing bitch!” You stop dead in your tracks, Jon looking at you with extreme concern and wondering what changed. Immediate memories flood in, Damian leaving, your grandfather working you to the bone after his disowned, former heir left. Harsh days that ended in you holding your stomach and trying to keep your breakfast from coming up, which didn’t always work and wasn’t always pleasant. Vomiting blood was the worst of it after you were hit a bit too hard and were left clenching onto your stomach for dear life.
“On your feet.” A grating voice that resembled your grandfather spoke, were you having a panic attack? All you knew is you were reliving you worst memories. Please I don’t want to remember! I won’t. “Do you want to be meaningless? Pick up your sword and face me, I won’t allow you to fail.” You wondered if your mother even cared, she would carefully ogle your hands at night, commenting on how your once porcelain, delicate, hands were now ruined. But she did nothing about it, you wanted to be the heir; but not like this. You risked being disowned too if you even asked about your father or brothers, so you didn’t. You just didn’t,
“Babe? Are you okay?” A familiar voice said, you were now acutely aware you were out of the alley and lifted into your boyfriend’s arms. “You were in a daze..I couldn’t wake you up I’m sorry.” He looked down whilst placing you guys atop a nearby building, “it’s okay, I’ve never had anything like that happen to me before.” Jon offered you and sympathetic look before taking one of your hands in his, “I wanted to show you something to make you feel better.” You tilted your head, wondering what he had planned.
“Come.” He said and slowly lifted his feet of the group flying upwards, you were also gently lifted off the ground; surprisingly, no strain, only his gorgeous features. “Only a little longer now.” He said as he went further up in the sky only a bit stray of the clouds, he quickly shifted you upwards into the bridal carry. “Sorry if this isn’t a comfortable position, I wanted you to be facing me; since you’re my equal and everything..” he spoke in a shy tone, without hiding the faint blush on his face. Your heart was melting, he might as well take it for himself. But you wouldn’t say that to him, could ruin the mood. “I’m plenty fine here.”
“Good we are here.” He took his fingers and lifted your chin upwards; you were met with a vast sea of glowing stars, because of the pollution in Gotham; you never saw this many. You had never felt so loved in your life, so validated, so cared for. You started shedding tears and hugging into his chest, “Shit-oh sorry I didn’t realise this would-I’m so sorry-“ Jon said scrambling to rub your back and pepper your forehead with kisses to repay you. “No, Jon, happy tears I promise.” You say softly and his calms and he places his chin on the top of your head, “This is why you’re the only person I’ve ever let into my heart in this sort of way..” You utter and Jon has to hold back some tears of his own, “Thank you.” You move in closer and grab his face to kiss him, and it seems like it lasts forever before you both pulled away gasping for breath.
“I think I-“ you scramble to get your words together, feeling everything so intensely, until your finally get it together. “I love you so much Jon Kent.”
“I love you.” You finish staring directly into his eyes, “I love you too.” He says, matching your gaze. “I love you so much more.”
“So much..”
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Tag list: @waterwyne @venusmorning @planetlotus @sugarrush-blush @skepvids @dreaming-of-the-reality @otterluver05 @godoreo22 @earth-to-name @krys0210 @jisnothere
It wouldn’t let me tag a few people so please check your settings if you asked to be a tagged and weren’t! (Sorry for the inconvenience)
Thank you for all the lovely support <3 it’s definitely helped me finish this part off and it’s very appreciated. 💕
Next Part: Robin Vs Batgirl (yes it’s getting dramatic in this one.)
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nshmuras · 2 days ago
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Its always the bad boys.
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part two of bad boy good girl.
genre: a little angsty
pair: badboy!heeseung x good girl!reader
warnings: blood, fighting, mentions of killing but no action intended.
buns note: this is way longer i hope.. and this is written in his pov.
Heeseung kept promises but also broke them as well.
whenever it came to you he always kept his promises tightly.
until now.
The hallway buzzed with screams and gasps Heeseung stood face-to-face with two of his classmates, their faces twisted with aggression.
Heeseung’s fists were clenched tightly at his sides, his heart racing as the tension in the air escalated. He hadn’t wanted to fight, he wanted to keep her promise. but these boys always tested him—always had something to say about her.
“Keep your mouth closed about my fucking girlfriend.” heeseungs temper flared up, but he took a deep breath, attempting to keep calm.
“Tch! you taking up for your bitch hu—“
heeseung swung a hit to the boys face and for a moment, he almost thought about smashing his face in. Adrenaline surged through him as he continued to land blows on the boys face, murmuring insults.
Just as Heeseung was about to land one last punch, a familiar voice rang out from the hallway, silencing everyone.
“Heeseung! what the hell are you doing?!”
Heeseung’s heart sank as he turned to see YN standing there, her eyes wide with disbelief, fear, and anger . She saw him. she watched him.
he released the boys collar and immediately approached her.
“YN, I—” he started, but she cut him off, anger in her eyes.
“Why are you fighting again!? you promised heeseung..” she stepped forward, her hands balled into fists at her sides about to reprimand him but heeseung stopped her.
“Baby please understand.. they-.. they said something about you. you know i can’t let them say that stuff.”
She looked at Heeseung, her expression softening for a brief moment. “I don’t want you to get hurt because of useless things people say about me heeseung!”
heeseung realized there were many people watching and he waved them off.
As they turned to walk away, Heeseung felt some relief wash over him. But the feeling was cut short when YN stepped closer, her disappointment evident.
“Why heeseung?” she whispered, her voice trembling. “You could have gotten hurt, or worse.”
Heeseung rubbed the bridge of his nose, his own frustration softening when around her. “I was just trying to defend you baby.. i—“ she cut him off.
“You don’t need to heeseung!” YN shot back, crossing her arms tightly. “These are just rumors and false claims about me. don’t let it anger yiu.”
He sighed, running a hand through his hair. “I know… I just… i hate it. i wanna protect you.”
She softened slightly, but the concern in her eyes remained. “Please.. this time i want you to promise me you will actually stop. okay?”
“I promise,” he said, his voice earnest. he wrapped his arms around her waist and buried his face in her neck.
she smiled and nodded, though her expression was adorned with a hint of worry. “i hate it when you get hurt heeseung.. it scares me.”
Heeseung felt guilt tug at his heart and he began to peck her neck in a form of apology.
“I know baby.. im sorry.” he pulled back and cupped her soft face, locking lips with her in a soft kiss.
he always kept promises for her.
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taglist: @wonsdoll @kairoot @baosui @cupidhoons @tzyunaes @elysianiki @mmygnolia
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potchi-fics · 15 hours ago
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detective (sevika x detective reader)
i | ii
the quietness and eeriness of your office make the hair on your nape stand up, and goosebumps appear along your arms--its chilly too. you undid a few buttons on your shirt, a deep sigh comes out of your mouth as you lean back on your chair and close your eyes. a few seconds pass by and you hear the clicking of shoes. 
a chuckle meet your ears.
you know who it is, and frankly, you are too tired to deal with her.
"not even gonna say hi, detective?" she purrs out the word detective.
you jaw clenches. 
you massage the bridge of your nose, "what is it? i was starting to think you were turning over a new leaf."
she replied with a guttural voice, "..maybe."
its followed by a cough, and that makes you open your eyes. concern and worry wash over your body as you take in the sight: she's all bloody, shit, how can she even stand up if she's that battered and bruised.
you hurriedly go to her, gently assessing her wounds.
"what the fuck happened to you?" the worry now lacing through your words.
she laughs but hisses, "this is nothing--"
"shut up," you managed to let her lean into you while you gently guide her on the small sofa you have in your office.
hastily, you snatch the med kit under your table. your eyebrows furrow in concentration to stitch her wounds, your jaw clenching harder as you hear her groan and moan in pain. to spare her, you warn her before doing anything. "this is gonna hurt, sevika."
"worried, are w--" 
you cut her off by pressing lightly on one of her injuries, sevika winks at you before falling silent. but then, she starts again.
you're stitching her eyebrow when she asks you, "you know, you could arrest me right here, right now, but you dont. Why?"
the question falls deaf on your ears– you wonder why.
"im vulnerable, im too injured to run from you. dont you want me to be your collar?" she presses on. "cmon, answer me."
"no."
"why not," she groans out, "c’mon, detective."
the pet name makes you stop. you stare at her before continuing. 
"what are you planning?" she eyes you up and down. 
you  roll your eyes, accidentally hurting her, "im planning nothing." she hisses, "sorry.."
"its fine, so why wont you arrest me?"
the scissors make the snip sound as it cuts the thread, "why wont you shut up?"
you grab some wet wipes to clean her bloodied and full of dirt face. the coldness of the material makes her close her eyes, seeming to be refreshed. 
sevika presses more, "answer my question first, detective.” 
she seems to be preparing herself because you’re close to her busted eyebrow, and a small smile adorns your face. you lean more towards her to see where your hand is. "i just wanna know, topsider.”
you’re so close to her face that you can feel her hot breath. god, the effect she has on you. your hand grabs her cheek, you turn her head to look at the side so that you can wipe her neck too. she lowly groans. god dammit. 
she slowly turns to look at you. her eyes staring deeply into your own, glinting even. she grasps your hand holding the wet cloth, her fingers getting rid of it and her nails trailing up your palm until she's intertwining your fingers. the ticklish sensation makes you bite your lips and you see her look down. 
"you like me, dont you, detective?"
cautiously, you straddle her lap. your unoccupied hand cups her jaw, thumb rubbing it softly. you lean in, you see her breathing stop. you lean more but, you pause just before your lips can meet. your nose touching, breaths fanning over one another, and eyes locked– you lead her hand that's holding your own on your waist. 
"yeah."
and with that, you slam your lips on hers. sevika reciprocates– pulling you even closer. you feel her fingers dig into your waist, making you groan. she takes that chance to slip her tongue in. she tries to pull you closer but there’s no space anymore.
note: ill prob write smut for this
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little-the-rat · 8 months ago
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Thank you people of the malevolent discord for all these ships. Surely I’ll feel well by the end.
We start off this journey with Butcher/Jon. Goodie.
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wammypilled · 3 days ago
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Mello and Misa on a one mofu open sleigh, the bimbo sleigh if you will
#yaaalllll the exhibit was so dope i left feeling like i was walking on a cloud and missed the train to yoLohama#no but really. so so cool#you could literally see the pen/brush/marker strokes! it was so much fun to spot all the little corrections! i think they changed misa's#side profile a little?? and for mello it was mostly just his lips#near had his whole existence remixed basically wbk but i personally didn't know the extent of it like they didn't even leave his hair alone#on those drawings there was more correction fluid than ink or marker#light looked sliiiightly different at the beginning (or is it just me?) and not in the schoolboy to kira way#it was something subtle about his features. L was the best drawn character like. for a mf whos supposed to be unattractive those lines +#shadows were consistently sublime#but then again all the art was. there was this one panel in which light looked like he might've had braces but I'm sure it was just an#optical illusion bc once again of the corrections#overall so much fun idk what i was so scared of the other fans there were just as excited and some even shy and nervous as me#we couldn't find the right elevator lmaooo#most of the girlies there were slaying like. *Slaying* im so glad i dressed up a tad!#only 'downside' is i feel like some merch items were missing like im not sure but. there wasn't that much. besides the plushies i only got a#misa sticker and the m2 & remisa acrylic glass panels thingies#at the ticket counter they had a map for international fans to put a dot on their country which was kinda cute♡#there werent many dots around the world maybe just like 20?is that even possible? but the southern Mediterranean gang has a dot too now hehe#oh and i got a free Light card..... like. i don't wanna see it💀💀💀#death note#death note shitpost#misa amane#mihael keehl#mello death note#dn#now that i look at them again they're kinda giving hunger games tributes on the chariot hfsgjzgk
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unproduciblesmackdown · 3 months ago
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(genderly) chill as hell if i was only ever glimpsed / detected like this
#Shrouded In A Rectangle neither sleeves nor an open front to be besieged with? yes#just doing whatever else like doesn't matter. tee cargo shorts which is my best guess rn of my ideal outfit. + sandals Absolutely#unfortunately my hair could never do that. somehow neither am i yet like forties fifties? have i not been at this for eons?#i Can be like uh let's just nobody talk to me i'm busy pensively perceiving truths that you don't ever actually wanna hear about#just the other day it was like hey....a [way Having To Talk could be a difficulty / problem] was under my nose in this lifelong pattern#certainly noticing the Verbal Exchange Demand heaped upon burnout as like [delay delay delay struggle weariness stress]#but also who knows like spent plenty of time just probably indeed Not having to have such exchanges while burned out. not noting them#anyway like this isn't even [dysphoric Ideal Outfit until i could [whatever supposed even more ideal than that gender euphoria]]#though shoutout to that but like nah get shrouded anyway. the only [how do i look] im motivated to consider is: when it's a costume#when it's just me it's like. i guess whatever pants and a comfortable enough tee. need glasses. hair's w/e so cut quite short ig#might accessorize w/things that are fun to me like hey yeah yknow i might want a calculator watch#[yea as a kid it was like :( im actively appreciating the animals supposedly Gross or Bad] if i had hated little friends Sure yaay#if i had disorienting light effects like a pelagic creature. but you don't even need that. like hey i'm nd in real life. i got it#chat i'm in the walls too bestie lmao. if only my bigfoot pose reference Step was this good#tl;dr long rephrasing of my being like; now the gender slay....#& nodding & Noting when [worksheet exercise: what's your gender euphoria look?] is like shrug idk. but this is serving maximally to me; so#going Chat how can i up my uncanny stats. looking up ''isn't it like Uncanny knowledge e.g. so like why not....canny''#but i think the un canny is the Uncanniness Accuser's perspective. not of My ken. your literal weird one maybe#so again apt to be like jk i'm just autistic & shit; i got it....horror shit challenge impossible: Don't have sm typical mundane#[disability moment] as like Unsettling danger/malice cues. challenge impossible; again#subverted here like as [horror holding hands touching foreheads w/comedy] w/o Rescinding just casual disabled behavior/qualities#just remembered like three witches weird sisters etc macbeth. weird uncanny soothsaying gendering. word#anyway i should be shrouded (made no any connection whenever i put the blanket now over my head & shoulders in place min ago)#perhaps the real Ideal Look insight: i do not have any way i wish to be observed by people. secret passages / removed room anytime
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transannabeth · 4 months ago
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they are 100% planning to transfer gatsby to bway if that makes u feel better
PROMISE?
i don't like... look up shows anymore so i don't see anything and since they have Zero social media presence i just didn't know. i especially didn't know since there's already a gatsby on broadway and i wasn't sure if they were willing to risk that yet given i have no idea how that show is doing. but god i hope so!! i will see it again. i'll move to nyc for a month and see it daily. this is dramatic. i'm also not sure if i'm kidding.
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1roentgen · 5 months ago
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.
#*shakes fist at sky angrily * dior sauvage…#i hate what you’ve done to me#*gravely injures imaginary hand punching imaginary wall because houses here are made of conk crete*#maybe it’s just him but what the fuck man#i’m like a rabid dog#but like in a chill way (lying)#i am unwell#i’ve actually been looking for a new daily fragrance cuz i can’t get dedcool milk here#i’ve been wearing chanel sport which is quite nice but the top notes are a bit too bright and citrusy#the drydown is amazing though#i finally identified the scent after catching whiffs of it in airports and shopping malls for years lmao#anyway anyway#my darling love/ ex husband/ mortal enemy/ friend/ crush? literally smells so good i wanna kill myself#(cool. and unbothered)#he wears sauvage but i think it’d be weird if i also did#maybe it’ll smell different on me?#it would just be too confusing if i smelled like him all the time#i’m thinking i’ll try versace dylan blue#it was the bergamot+ambroxan combo that i really liked in dedcool milk as well#i got molecule 02 for layering cuz i loooove ambroxan#bro sauvage gets so much hate on fragrantica ion understand#it’s like. so good. like crazy good. best thing i ever smelled it’s like fucking pheromones or some shit#fucking hell#i should get a sample and see if it’s actually the perfume or if i’m really just that down bad#smh im going to bed yuzu’s already asleep#i’m too lazy to journal and ion wanna be blowing up peoples phones with my inane ramblings anymore you know
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cantdanceflynn · 8 months ago
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IK I HAVENT DRAWN IN FOREVER BTW IM WORKING ON CATCHING UP
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tiredrobin · 4 months ago
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me: why . did this gain over a hundred notes really fast. who did this. [spots mod in my tags] yeah fuckin. alright.
murderbot's primary combat tactic is to go up a wall. that's its favorite move. no one ever sees it coming, man. its second favorite combat tactic is to body tackle entities in the face. nothing on or off the planet is funnier than murderbot fighting like a flying squirrel
#ADGKGJDJGFG NOT A COMPLAINT#second time ive gotten an rb from u tht got me a buncha notes in a short window of time#its funny every time cuz my kneejerk is to go 'i have got to delete my blog' like no . u doofus#anyway if u wanna read a heartfely novella series abt personhood and traums in a hyper capitalist society#u shld definitely read th murderbot diaries#hides all my thoughts abt it frantically. what do u mean its my special interest. what do u MEAN im extremely biased. no clearly im like#sooooo not biased cmon man#cmaaahhn dont even look at me#i literally just wokr up is what my excuse shld b for these tags but im kind of just like this all the time. lol. lmao even#edit wait MOD hi sorry we dont know each other but [shakes ur hand with uncomfortable intensity and speed] hi hello welcome to my twisted mi#if YOU read the murderbot diaries and then Talk Abt It then ppl who follow u might also read it as well#in the tone of voice of a guy who is thinking abt its special interest Hi this means MORE PPL TO TALK ABT IT#literally do what u want forever but my quick pitch is uhhh martha wells waw gonna make the first novella a tragedy but#changed her mind#the amount of Situations murderbot ends up in is cartoonish. it cant take a single step without uncovering a new murderplot (haha) that it#has to rescue its humans about#its an unreliable narrator but in the sense that ur reading its diary logs and it just leaves shit out it doesnt care abt but goes on#tangents abt things likr security and its favorite shows#its FUNNY in the midst of stress and fear and tragedy. and its Honest. but ms wells chooses hope over and over#and so obviously so does murderbot#its about love and connection and Trying despite the odds. and its about the subtle and not so subtle effects abt ptsd. and its about#ancient alien biohazard material but entirely by accident on the aliens part#but seriously dont like push urself to read it its good but i encourage approaching it at ur own pace or even never if it ends up like that#[finally stops shaking ur hand] otay byebye
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29121996 · 13 days ago
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like i get physically ill thinking abt all of this n it just . its a Lot !!! and i cant even talk abt it !!! bc i dont know how to word what happened !!!! and it doesnt matter vut im still hurt !!! im still angry !!!! im still getting occasional messages that rip me apart and rile me up !!!! ofc i hate him !!!! i wanna be sick abt all of it and none of u even fucking get it !!!! and thats what pisses me off !!! and it shouldny bc it doesnt matter.
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waywardsalt · 3 months ago
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finally got around to putting together elden ring builds for the post-ph crew, and tested them out briefly, so here are the builds i came up with and all that! (absolutely a very long post, i had fun explaining a lot of my reasoning)
i'm not going to give them exact stats, just some vague idea of what they'd likely lean towards, and i can't say much to what equip load they have. when i tested these builds out i had 72 endurance. this uses exclusively base-game equipment since i don’t have the dlc and wanted to test these out for myself.
i also don’t use many spells or any incantations so the spell and incantation choices are mostly based on wiki descriptions and whether or not i felt it would fit the character.
some context is that this is with the idea that somehow these four get zapped into the lands between as tarnished, and this is the equipment i think they’d use, disregarding what is needed to access most of this stuff.
i also didn't change my tarnished's appearance for these, not that i think i could accurately replicate these four in elden ring's character creator, anyways, so you get to see my tarnished's face with all of these :)
Link:
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His armor is: the highwayman hood, the blue cloth vest, exile gauntlets, and Carian knight greaves.
There's practically no green armor in this game, and what is there isn't really armor and isn’t exactly good protection. I wanted a bit of a balance between just cloth, but also some armor, as well as a headpiece somewhat like the usual hero's cap. The highwayman's hood works well enough, honestly, and I think it fits in well with the blue cloth vest; plus, I can see it being helpful in keeping dust and whatnot out of his eyes. Blue works well enough with Link nowadays, and I do think the blue cloth vest actually fits Link well enough- I doubt he'd want to wear something like a plate breastplate, so a vest like this is good.
The exile gauntlets I feel work well, they're simple and slim with some decent coverage, and the Carian knight graves not only look great with the blue cloth vest, but are also something that I believe fits Link, and the tall boots are likely decently practical in the same vein as the hood.
His weapons I chose are: The Carian knight's sword, with the pulley bow as a secondary weapon, and the Carian knight's shield in his offhand, with the academy glintstone staff as a secondary.
He obviously had to be the good standard sword-and-shield combo fighter, but I went ahead and gave him with Carian sword and shield partially because they look decently similar to what weapons he normally uses, but also because I enjoy the idea of him dabbling in magic along with typical damage types. The Carian sword does a good bit of magic damage along with standard, and the shield guards again both of those types, and the sword's unique ash of war (Carian Grandeur) is a good mix between swordfighting and magic, and actually really good to use in-game. I feel like they suit him well.
For his secondaries, I had to give him a bow, and I feel like the pulley bow is just right, especially with it's special feature of having increased range. I could see him being the one tasked with deactivating faraway traps and hunting the animals of the Lands Between for materials, and even just luring enemies with some normal arrows.
The academy glintstone staff is a solid staff (and the one I personally use), and him using magic is a good way to translate his usual versatility, though I only limited him to five spells, those being:
Loretta's greatbow, giving him what is technically now a second bow, and a pretty good spell for luring and doing some decent magic damage,
Magma shot, a good, simple fire damage spell,
Glintstone Icecrag, a good ice spell, especially for causing frostbite buildup,
Great glintstone shard, a very basic but reliable spell, and is good when cast a few times in succession,
and Thops' barrier, for deflecting magic attacks, and though I've heard it's a mediocre spell, I could see Link getting the timing down and getting some good usage out of it. I tried giving him a decent range of spells, which is a little bit easier said then done considering the actual spell variety and wanting to pick spell that I think suit Link, but I think this is a good lineup.
For talismans, assuming that all four of them have all four talisman slots open, Link gets the silver scarab, the graven-mass talisman, the erdtree's favor +2, and the companion jar.
The silver scarab, raising item discovery is... perfect for Link. It only feels right that he gets a talisman that makes him more likely to get items off enemies. It definitely works, too, while testing, I got way more items out of the gatefront ruins group than I'd ever seen before.
The graven-mass talisman boosts sorcery power, which is certainly perfect for boosting Link's versatility and magic power, simple and useful.
The erdtree’s favor +2 is just an all-around great talisman to use for the hp, mp, and stamina boost, and it feels perfect as something for Link to use, especially to increase his effectiveness and endurance in battle.
And then the companion jar, which goes hand-in-hand with him also being a pot user to further his versatility, and it’s very easy to see him doing the Jar-Bairn side quest. My choices here disregard how the items are obtained, but I could absolutely see Link going out of his way to interact with Jarburg.
Link’s standard fighter, with a balance between offense and defense and physical and magical damage with a slight leaning towards magical, and the main archer who aims to do more damage with archery, and uses pots when needed. He’s probably the one ‘leading the charge’ in that he’s suited for most situations, but isn’t necessarily the most effective in all-out combat- he is the most defensively oriented, however. He’s likely in the mid-to-light equip range, and likely mostly levels Strength and Intelligence to keep his damage up, and focuses a lot on keeping his Vigor up for a good chunk of health.
Linebeck:
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His armor is: the black knife armor, the gauntlets, and bandit boots.
The black knife armor is the most important part of the set, not just for it being a nice blue, but because it has the unique effect of completely silencing your movement sounds- perfect for steal and getting in a good number of sneak attacks. It’s light, too, and so are the generally standard gauntlets and bandit boots, all put together for a general… blue rogue kind of look? It’s practicality and some looks and all put around the idea that he’s going to be sneaking around and panic-rolling out of the enemy’s way- so his defenses are a bit lacking in favor of mobility. I do think it’s a good look overall.
His weapons are: A bloody antspur rapier with the poison mist ash of war, the redbranch shortbow as a secondary weapon, and the frozen needle in the offhand.
For Linebeck's build, it was either daggers or rapiers, and the extra damage, range, and great designs for the rapier won out- and I think rapiers suit him well. This specific pair of rapiers are oriented around inflicting ailments, with the frozen needle inflicting frostbite, and the antspur rapier- specifically with the poison mist ash of war and blood upgrade- can inflict scarlet rot, bloodloss, and poison with poison mist active. With the blood upgrade, the scarlet rot buildup suffers, but with the speed of rapiers and just how effective scarlet rot can be, it's a decent trade-off for the ability to do four ailments at once. His role in the Radahn fight is to inflict scarlet rot and then run off to snipe him with the redbranch shortbow, which is a simple ranged option, and helps with further ailment inflicting with ailment arrows.
His damage would probably be pretty decent, especially considering inflicting frostbite and his equipped talismans, but he's mostly going to be heading in with everyone and sticking around until proccing an ailment, and then backing off, especially if poison, rot, or frostbite are inflicted. Plus I think dual rapiers look great and it's very easy to see Linebeck using rapiers.
For talismans, he gets the gold scarab, the assassin's crimson dagger, the dagger talisman, and the blessed dew talisman.
The gold scarab boost rune acquisition by 20%. It's perfect. It's one of my favorite talismans. I can't make an Elden Ring build for Linebeck and NOT give him the money-boosting talisman.
The assassin's crimson dagger restores hp upon successful critical hits, and paired with the silencing effect of the black knife armor, is perfect for someone who's more used to sneaking around and taking down enemies from behind- and it's good for topping off your hp.
The dagger talisman boosts critical damage- so then making sneak attacks all the more effective, and even making any critical hits he manages in fights do much more damage.
And then the blessed dew talisman gives you a very minuscule constant hp regen, about 2 hp per second iirc. It’s incredibly slow, but it's hp regen all the same, good for saving flask uses and good for some health regeneration if you back out of the main fight.
Linebeck's got a big focus on stealth and ailments, with just a bit of health regen tossed in with the talismans to help with survivability. his weapons and offhand options are mainly based around ailments, and besides the bow, he tends to use darts and other throwable items, and is often the one to pick off enemies at the edge of a group while the others go in to the handle the main group. With bosses, he's in the front lines until an ailment is inflicted, and will jump back in either if he's really needed, or if ailments are needed again. For longer bosses, or bosses immune to a few ailments, he would probably find moments to jump in and get a bunch of quick hits in, then back out and wait for another opening. Rapiers are pretty good for quick hits considering that I believe you actually get three attacks from a dual-rapier sprint attack. He’d likely have a focus on Dexterity and Arcane, with some Endurance mixed in for that good running and rolling stamina.
Damien:
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His armor is; the sacred crown helm, exile armor, crucible gauntlets, and drake knight greaves.
Picking armor for Damien was a bit of a challenge since he’s still a bit of a work in progress and I usually picture him in generally casual clothes, but I knew I wanted to stick with some red clothing and put together a bit more of a practical sort of outfit. Plus this end result kind of helps me further figure out Damien’s actual design and outfit variations.
I knew I wanted to give him one of the simple footsoldier helmets, and the sacred crown helm won out with the additional detail of the little vine-looking wreath, plus the minor faith boost. It’s a nice little helmet and I think it suits him. The exile armor was considered due to the red cloth around the shoulders, and was properly decided on when I found that the helmet got rid of the cloth covering the bottom half of the face. So it’s a good solid chest piece.
The crucible gauntlets and drake knight greaves work both with color and giving him some more armored extremities, the crucible gauntlets are pretty good heavy armor gauntlets, if the crucible knights themselves are anything to go by, and the drake knight graves seem to have a good bit of practicality with the high boots and armor. It’s all meant to end up somewhere in the medium equip load area, for a balance between defense and speed, and the lighter helmet and chest piece were primarily to even out with the heavier weapons.
The weapons he gets are: the axe of Godrick, the highland axe as a secondary, and the clawmark seal.
The axe of Godrick is a pretty good greataxe with what selection there is, some good damage and a really good ash of war skill with a really good area of effect. It’s fantastic for crowd control when two-handed, and worked pretty well for me when I tested it out without having upgraded it. It’s all in all a great standard axe. The highland axe as a secondary is used partially as a faster one-hand option, and partially for the boost given by its war cry ash of war. The axe of Godrick is almost always what he’d use, but the highland axe is probably better for some specific situations. Damien was always going to end up using axes, and I think these two are pretty good and fitting.
In his other hand is the clawmark seal- scaling with faith and strength and so working well with him relying on strength, and boosting bestial incantations, of which he has one- and he mostly uses support incantations with some minor attack incantations- but he is primarily support, usually backing out of the fight to switch to casting due to usually two-handing the axe of Godrick. He gets six incantations, those being:
Heal, as a very standard heal, mostly just for himself,
Erdtree heal, a heal more intended for group healing,
Golden vow, a group offense and defense buff for a time,
Protection of the erdtree, for increased non-physical defense, which is likely useful for many bosses,
Bestial sling, which is a pretty basic but effective attack incantation, and boosted by the seal he uses, and is probably great in tandem with his axes to break an enemy's poise,
and then Dragonclaw as his final spell, a stronger and closer-up attack spell, likely for individual bosses that are lower on hp.
His offenses are standard and meant to be pretty decent for crowd control and poise-breaking, so his attack spells follow suite, while his support options are based around healing and some basic buffs. I personally do not use buffs or incantations when I play, so I do not know the nuances of a lot of this stuff, but Damien's got a good set of incantations to use.
Damien's set of talismans are the green turtle talisman, the mottled necklace +1, the axe talisman, and the bull-goat's talisman.
The green turtle talisman is a great talisman, simply increasing the speed of stamina regeneration, and it's a fantastic talisman. Very useful with the stamina drained by axe attacks and backing off to cast spells.
The mottled necklace boosts immunity, robustness, and focus, an across-the-board status boost, and I imagine it's useful for being up close with enemies and then staying alive to help with support- even if he doesn't have much in the way of ailment-based support.
The axe talisman is a damage booster, and considering his decent poise, charged attacks are pretty viable for him to be using.
The bull-goat's talisman is standard but very effective in practice (or maybe that's me being used to low poise), as it raises poise, therefore making it harder for you to flinch or be knocked out of an attack. Very helpful with a slower main weapon like the axe of Godrick.
Damien's standard all around, with pretty good damage and likely very helpful with crowd control, usually two-handing the axe for maximum damage and will back off when using incantations. He primarily uses incantations for support, and the offensive incantations are usually saved for bosses or rougher encounters- or sometimes just if he wants to switch things up for fun. He's likely going to focus on Strength and Faith, with some Mind thrown in for most casts.
Bellum:
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His armor is: the altered tree sentinel armor, and the malformed dragon gauntlets and greaves.
Chosen partially for the color and because they're all heavy plate armor; meant to emulate a lot of the phantom designs, and for that yellow color, and I wasn't even aware that the malformed dragon gauntlets had a darker color until I was initially putting this together. Heavy armor fits with a desire to survive in battle, plus I think decent mobility in heavy armor suits Bellum; when I tested this out, I was firmly in medium equip load territory, plus it made for a good bit of poise to go with slower weapons. It wasn't too hard to pick out armor for him.
The weapons I felt suit him are: the blasphemous blade, the Marais executioner's sword, with the gravel stone seal as a secondary.
The blasphemous blade was practically necessary, a greatsword with the bonus effect of hp restoration on enemy death, plus the Taker's Flames skill, which also heals hp when it hits an enemy. This is was made me decide on greatswords over colossal weapons, trying to stick a bit with some ideas from the phantoms, plus the hp-leeching effects, plus it’s a pretty good weapon and I think it originally belonging to Rykard also fits pretty well; it’s Bellum’s main weapon unless he switches to the Marais Executioner’s sword for it’s specific skill. That sword is mostly chosen for it’s skill, as well as it’s origins- those bell-bearing hunters are absolute nightmares to deal with- so the two swords are kind of also picked for a sort of intimidation effect. At least the wriggling flesh on the blasphemous blade does the job well enough if someone doesn’t know the origins (which don’t practically matter). He would likely switch to the executioner’s sword for some boss fights, and its skill can be highly damaging to lone enemies- the focus with these two is on heavy damage and hp regen.
The secondary left hand weapon he has is the gravel stone seal, which boost dragon incantations, and so he only uses offense incantations, with a lot of incantations that cover a wide area and some that inflict ailment buildup. Bellum gets five incantations, all attacks (and all maybe emulating the idea that he’s a monster forced to be human in the lands between lol);
Beast claw, a pretty standard but pretty effective ground-level attack,
Unendurable frenzy, a wide range, fiery madness-inflicting incantation that, while only inflicting madness on a select few enemies (and himself) is likely more than useful for crowds and large enemies,
Rotten breath, a dragon communion incantation that is about what it says on the tin, a dragon’s breath attack that inflicts scarlet rot,
Fortissax’s lightning spear, another dragon incantation that summons a pair of lightning spears, with the damage at it’s best up close,
and Aspects of the crucible: tail, a wide-range crucible incantation, and the most fitting of the crucible incantations, I feel.
He has no issue getting up close to bosses, since he can fall back on the honestly insane hp regen he’s afforded by both his main weapon and some of his talismans.
The talismans Bellum gets are; the taker’s cameo, the dragoncrest greatshield talisman, the pearldrake talisman +2, and the godskin swaddling cloth.
The taker’s token has the same passive effect as the blasphemous blade; hp restoration upon enemy death. The fun part is that the taker’s token and the blasphemous blade’s hp regen effects stack with each other.
The dragoncrest greatshield talisman reduces physical damage by 20%, and the pearldrake talisman +2 reduces non-physical damage by about 11%. Covering just about all defenses with these two talismans.
The godskin swaddling cloth allows for additional minor hp restoration upon landing a certain number of melee hits within a short timeframe. This could be harder with greatswords, but with dual greatswords and jumping right into the action, I don’t imagine it’s at all impossible for the talisman’s effect to never trigger. As always, it’s extra effective with a larger number of enemies.
Bellum’s the main damage-dealer with a focus on staying power and lots of hp regen, using the blasphemous blade for regular battles while switching to the executioner’s sword for bosses due to the more aggressive ash of war. His incantations are more often used for crowd control, but are absolutely effect for boss battles, especially when given time to charge them up. He’s all about staying power and straightforward damage-dealing, with some decent poise to back things up despite his checking piece being altered and his lack of a helmet, and all of his incantations are a bit more bestially-inclined. He'd probably focus on Vigor and Strength, with some Faith or Dexterity thrown in for damage-dealing.
Overall, the idea is that the four of them are in the lands between like this, working and running around together, probably fighting over what bosses to go after next and whether or not to head into the catacombs that one of them just spotted. I could see them taking the time to scour the lands between for every little trinket and discussing whether or not to bother with some character's quest. Not too different from actual post-ph stuff, but it's fun to put them in Elden Ring and think on what kinds of equipment to give them and what would suit them.
#salty talks#elden ring#post-ph#ppl checking out the elden ring tag for normal elden ring stuff disregard this dw abt it i have this tagged for my own organization#of these four linebeck's was the most fun to actually use but its mostly bc its the most similar to my usual build#bellum's was kinda cumbersome but god i hated link's i never want to use a shield i almost died testing out link's#which is fuckin saying something at gatefront ruins at level 218#i didnt test out any of the magic bc. number 1 i have 10 faith. and number two i picked these off fextralife wiki#long post#bellum HAD to use the blasphemous blade its perfect its a big sword that has an hp regen skill and regens hp when you kill something#and has nasty little moving bits of flesh on it. cant see it in the picture ofc but know that in game the red bits wriggle i like it#sorry if the pictures are big btw tbh they look better on mobile#the angle on damien's is awkward bc i wanted to get the whole axe on screen. thats the only reason why his is a little weird#prolly worth mentioning that i didnt alter my stats at all so the 'build' is like the equipment and stuff.#tbh thats probably why my damage with the bellum build suffered bc i have 10 faith and the blasphemous blade scales with faith#anyways listed all equipment and whatnot if anyone wanted the specifics of this stuff#im not great at like. putting together outfits in elden ring i figured out my tarnished's fit early on and stuck with it#theres a very good chance that my own playstyle and experience with the game influenced these like. i do not touch incantations for one#and ive been dual wielding since as soon as i figured it out and got two straight swords#iirc i briefly used rock sling bc you can get that really early but eh#thinking abt it now this also translates pretty well to traditional rpg party roles. standard link with all around decent stats but high#versatility and a lot of options. linebecks more speed and ailment-inflicting based. damien is high standard damage but a much more support#and healing based with a few basic standard damage spells. and bellum is more dedicated offense and defense with a focus on staying power#without any group support or other traits- just high offense high defense#if you wanna know what my tarnished looks like know this is inaccurate bc ive since tweaked her#the hp regen on bellums is wild when i cleared out gatefront like every few seconds id heard the hp steal sound effect it was nuts#no notes on damiens his was was surprisingly easy to get a handle of and is great with crowds#you can probably tell from the way this is written that it took me fucking forever to write up
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starboundsingularities · 9 months ago
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good lird they did not make a gimmick blog about a real life murder
#someone fucking DIED but whatever who gives a shit it's funny i guess
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🥚 eggvidenced Follow
honestly with how suspicious and confusing everything on the dl-6 case was i wouldn't be surprised if it came out that it was that prosecutor guy tbh
🌟 rockliker270 Follow
date posted: june 23, 2010
1,834,853 notes
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⚖️ courtofpublicopinions Follow
🌟 rockliker270 Follow
ok hear me out. what abt winston payne though
🧊 just--ice Follow
okay now they're just making lawyers up
#also didn't mvk die or something?
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🔥 triedbyfire Follow
why the fuck are you people still posting about the gavinners as if theyre not copaganda. didn't the guitarist get convicted of murder
🎸 guiltiest-lovers837 Follow
so fucking tired of this "um um didn't daryan get convicted of murder" YEAH AND HE'S LITERALLY NOT IN THE FUCKING BAND ANYMORE. dipshit
🔥 triedbyfire Follow
are you gonna address the copaganda thing or
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🌻 attorneybout Follow
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he's so. 😳
📂 trialanderror Follow
why is he defending
📂 trialanderror Follow
OP WHY IS HE DEFENDING???
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🦈 giantlakemonsters Follow
i just wanna hear about another gourdy sighting thats all
🥜 liberdeez Follow
op. i'm so sorry op. gourdy isn't real you have to let her go. they had a whole trial about it.
🔐 wrightorwrong Follow
hi!! so this isn't actually the case as while gourdy was briefly mentioned in a trial, said trial had nothing to do with whether or not gourdy was "real" per se as much as. well. murder, actually. while gourdy WAS found out to be an inflatable steel samurai this was not brought up in the case at all as the veracity of gourdy wasn't really as relevant as the fact that the witness was looking for gourdy rather than at the murder she claimed to have seen. plus this was also a relatively small part of a MUCH larger trial which for those interested not only solved the dl-6 case but ALSO marked the end of prosecutor von karma's ~40 year long record and the court records are really a fascinating read through!!
🦀 mad_libz_87 Follow
net 0 information post
#thanks again lawblr
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🍒 cherriescoola Follow
btw i was at the park the other day and klavier gavin (of gavinners fame) was there and obv there was a huge crowd but this guy was there with him and at some point he (the other guy) waved to the crowd and someone still screamed like it was klavier??? who was that guy ive never seen him before in my life
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🩸 has-dl6-been-solved-yet Follow
December 28, 2016
YES!!!
702,947 notes
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🪙 tellerlikeitis Follow
guys help i'm a bank teller and this guy just introduced himself as robin banks what do i do
🔪 violencekilling Follow
you gotta let him rob you that's the law
302,948 notes
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👻 ghostesswiththemostest Follow
look if i ever get convicted of murder im just hiring the lawyer with the coolest sounding name
💼 courtofwaw Follow
bestie if you already got convicted it is Too Late
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📋 lawandwhoreder Follow
guys i know it's real fun to think people just can predict whatever but if you look at the earliest reblogs of that post that "guessed" the true killer in the dl-6 case it was actually a post about how they didn't want to go to the store. clearly edited
#stg nobody bothers to factcheck anything anymore
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🐺 lawnewolf Follow
i am NOT homophobic or whatever the fuck you guys are saying now i just think its weird to write fanfiction about realass people?? go touch grass ffs
🌈 lawsbian Follow
the fun police (this guy) putting me in yaoi court but the lawyers (phoenix witrght and miles edgeworth) just keep trying to make out (real court is like this too btw)
🐺 lawnewolf Follow
YOU HAVE SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOU.
#look idc what your enemies to lovers fic bullshit says #they're straight. and more importantly REAL PEOPLE. #there's TENSION because they are in COURT and there are LIVES on the LINE. #not because they wanna fuck. god.
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🔮 inhighspirits Follow
why dont they just ask the spirit mediums to ask the victims who killed them this law shit is easy
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💞 lawveyourself Follow
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seriously i cant believe they gave this guy a law degree
💞 lawveyourself Follow
what do you mean evidence fraud
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🎧 instrumentalillness Follow
fuck you *unguilties your love*
384,568 notes
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🎀 copiicat Follow
perjury isnt illegal btw in fact if youre one of tge witnesses youre legally required to lie on the stand. thats why everyone does it. trust me
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evilgwrl · 3 months ago
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ExHusband!Simon x Reader
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You Want a Divorce? (Two)
Note: I feel like this is so bad im sorry!!!!
CW: Angst, titty sucking, passionate asf sex, simon missed ur pussy and you very much and vise versa, breeding kink, PIV (no protection, pls use it irl), squirting, simon eats the FUCK out of ur pussy, multiple orgasms, praise, hint of degradation, possessive!simon, OVERSTIMULATION, slight daddy kink… sorry
Part One
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It was a quiet ride, the subtle sweeps of cars fleeting by as Simon gripped the wheel, eyes trailing off to the side to look at you briefly. Your head was leaned against the window, your knees knocking together anxiously as your daughter babbled in the back, cooing about how Mummy and Daddy were now back together.
You tried to hide the shed of tears that filtered across your iris, every small childish mumble like a stab to the gut as you listened to the genuine happiness in her tone. You would turn around occasionally with a small smile as you reached out to tickle her foot, giggles filling the car.
Simon pulled in, the car bouncing slightly as it hit the gravel carpark, his hand swerving into a spot before he turned to the back. “You excited, baby?”
Ella’s face lit up as she fumbled to take off her seatbelt, “Get me, Daddy! Get me! I wanna see the lions!” It was refreshing knowing she still viewed Simon as her hero, no matter how distant he was in their lives. You knew that even though your ex-husband was rarely around, his time with them did everything it could to mend the time apart. Toby woke up at the commotion, the toddler having slept the whole way there despite his older sister’s constant bickering about what animals she had to see first.
Everything seemed to flash past you as you walked inside, the whir of kids and noise sending your brain into overdrive as your eyes flickered to Simon with Ella swinging around on his shoulders and Toby kicking his legs in the stroller. You looked away; breath shaky as you attempted to compose yourself. This was supposed to be a happy day, for all of you, yet seeing him with your children, something that was supposed to be normal, felt so distant and unknown. Gathering yourself, you plastered a fake smile, hands reaching out to pinch your son’s cheeks as you grabbed the stroller.
Your heart hammered in your chest for the remainder of the day, fingers tingling with anxiety that bled into your veins, consuming your lungs with what seemed like everything but oxygen. It was a series of squeals and commotions from your young ones, their elation evident through the bright glow of their face, soft red resting on the apples of their cheeks. As the day quieted down, Toby slumped in the stroller as you tucked him into the car seat, his new plush crocodile cradled into his arms, mouth wide open as subtle breaths snored out.
Ella was cradled into Simon’s shoulder, her shoes half hanging off as she clutched onto him, dead asleep. You settled into the ride home yet your anxiety only seemed to heighten. You were alone with Simon, with no kiddish voices to break the tension, brown orbs glaring into the side of your face.
“Should we talk about this morning?”
You scoffed. “You have some nerve asking to talk about this morning,” you screamed into a hush, “What you did was completely disrespectful. Not only did you break into my house and kick my date out, but you left our kids in the car! What the fuck were you thinking?”
He cleared his throat, almost like he wanted to hold back how he felt. You noticed the white in his knuckles as he gripped the wheel, right eye twitching as he stared at the squiggles of tar ahead. “I don’t want our kids growing up thinking it’s normal for parents to separate. They need their mum and dad together, y/n.”
The world silenced for a second, the screams of the wind rushing past you seemed to slow as your voice cracked, seeps of emotion pouring out as you choked on your breath, “Then you should have fought for your family, Simon. There is no us anymore, it’s just them. They’re all that connects us now.”
You felt like all the ivory had been sucked out of your eyes, endless pits of your pupil consuming you whole, blurring your vision with fog as you blinked, hot streams of liquid salt spilling onto your cheeks, brimming at the cracks of your lips as you sniffled. You could feel his hesitation as he looked at you.
His words regurgitated in his throat as he stammered, tangled limbs reaching out to grip yours as you pulled away.
“Just drop us home.”
Your eyes had dried now, soft stains of bare skin caving through your foundation as you smudged your fingers against it. Simon stuttered as he pulled up to the driveway, tyres screeching to a halt as you sat in silence.
The soft strum of fingers caught your attention as you turned around, the innocent face of Toby looking back at his parents, tongue blabbing out of his mouth. “Dadda! You have dinner?”
“No, sport. Daddy’s gotta go-“
“Yeah, baby. Daddy will have dinner with us.”
You blinked at your own words, Simon’s surprised expression meeting yours. The wrench in your heart would never subside, the entirety of the beating organ still belonging to your ex-husband, but being a mother was a sacrifice. And you would sacrifice yourself in every existence you become one if it meant your children didn’t have to battle the same internal wounds.
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“They’re tucked in,” Simon said, voice soft as he noticed your withered body in the couch. Your hair was messy now, strands spitting out as you anxiously tucked them back in, smoothing them down with the dampness of your palms as you ran around all night, ushering to the demands of your children.
“Thank you.”
You felt ill, your tongue cascading down your throat as you palmed at your knees, desperate for him to leave yet desperate for him to stay. Simon stilled, keys jangling in his hand before he sat down next to you, his weight disrupting the couch as he shuffled around.
“I need you to know that I did want to fight for you, y/n. I have counted every single day since you handed me those papers, waiting by my phone every single night on deployment hoping for you to text me, call me, fuck - blow my phone up. I never wanted the temporary absence that we had apart become permanent. Everything I said,” he breathed, voice cracking slightly as he looked away, “Everything I said on October 6th, 7 years ago, I meant. You weren’t supposed to get away from me - I shouldn’t have - I shouldn’t have let you get away from me.”
It was strange. Simon was never one for feelings, the brutality of his job allowed for any harsh emotions to crack through his fingers as he pulled a trigger, any dampness of tears would sweat through his skin as he pummelled a blade into an enemies head.
But it was you. And you weren’t violent, or any enemy, you were his wife, the person he vowed his entirety too.
Your anxious cascade cracked as you whimpered out a sob, chest heaving as you buried your face, tight with tears, into the pillows of your hands. You felt warmth spread through you, the texture of Simon’s fingers burning through you like wildfire, every ember he felt scorching through your flesh as he pulled you in.
Arms tangled together, intwining like wool as he wrapped you into his chest nimbly. A zephyr ran through you, your wrists clutched in his hands as you straddled him, the weight of you feeling like the grandest treasure upon him.
It was nothing strange, nor sexual but Simon recognised that cry, the differing pitch as you shuffled your frame into his. Simon knew you like the back of his hand, every crevice, every crease, every scar. He knew your backstory, and the one you made up to impress people. He knew the hex of the colour of your eyes and the print of your thumb. No papers would take that away from him.
Soaked eyelashes clumped into one as you looked up at him, orbs resembling once of a doe, innocence seeping through every inch of a salt-stained tear. His eyes met yours, apertures of cocoa reflecting your weary frame as you gripped onto him.
“Let me come home, please.”
Simon’s voice was desperate, it was raw, any shed of arrogance erased through the lines, eyebrows knotted together as he rubbed at the small of your back.
Your nod was subtle, but he could practically hear it, calloused hands gripping at the plush of your cheek and seeping through the tip of your spine, thumb rubbing at your earlobe as he clutched onto you.
Hot, seething pricks ran through your limbs as your lips connected, saline lining your mouth as he lapped at the heat of your tongue, rough groans leaving his lips as he savoured the taste.
Any diffidence left your body as familiarity sunk back into you. Hands pawed at the globe of your ass, gripping the flesh as anguished limbs wrapped around Simon’s waist.
With an easy tug, he lifted you, your hands wrapping around his neck as he pulled you in closer, teeth kissing. You never questioned Simon’s strength, and you wouldn’t start now as you felt your back hit your mattress.
He tugged at his shirt, the black fabric pooling on the floor as you sucked in a breath. Your eyes traced every scar, lighter flesh engraved into the skin of his torso, a short trail of hair disappearing into his pants as you stared at his burly physique.
Simon gripped at your shirt, the material practically ripping before his hands were at your chest, grabbing at your flesh desperately as you tangled your fingers into your bra, sliding it off. His mouth was hot on your chest, the sound of moans and pants filling the air as he positioned himself between your legs, teeth grazing the hard nubs, sucking with fervour as you whined, your hand at the base of his head, cradling it.
“Missed these so fucking much,” he practically whined, groping your tits as he pinched your nipples, lips sucking deep marks of possession into the soft skin. Your pants were desperate, begging him for more as you pulled his hair, fingernails clawing at his scalp.
Your hands fumbled with your pants, hips raising as he slid them off, clumsy fingers chucking them across the room as you laughed, lips connecting once more in a giggly state as his thumb pushed against the wetness of your panties.
“Missed how fucking wet you got for me. Such a good fucking girl,” he groaned, fingers rubbing at your heat through the thin cloth eliciting a pained moan from you.
“Simon - I need more, been so long.”
He choked out a laugh as his fingers hooked into the fabric, lace dribbling down your leg before he mewled at the sight of you. His hands held your thighs apart, your soaking cunt on display as it throbbed, slick folds glistening in the poor lighting.
“Prettiest fucking pussy,” he choked out to himself, placing your legs over his shoulder as he knelt down. Your back arched as you felt his tongue lick a long stripe of your pussy, his body seething for a taste of you as his lips found your neglected clit.
He lapped at you mercilessly, your cries and moans moulding into one with the filthy squelches of his mouth against your heat. Long digits circled your entrance, teasing you, before they curled in.
Your eyes rolled, pools of ivory exposed as you let out a guttural moan, your thighs tightening around his ears as he smirked against your pussy. Cocky fingers rubbed at the right spot, favouring the clench of your tight hole as he pulled every noise he could get from you.
You were barely cohesive as he lapped at your slick, the throbbing of your clit edging him on as he soothed your g-spot with the pad of his fingers. The coil you had only ever felt with Simon began to build, the familiar sensation pooling in your stomach as you stuttered out a whimper.
“Si- too much - I’m gonna-“
“That’s it baby,” he cooed, pulling away from your pussy for a second to take in your expression as you came, your face contorted with pleasure as your legs jerked, pussy wrapping tighter around his abusing digits as he fucked you through it with them. You looked down at him, saliva and your slick coating his mouth and chin as he grinned.
You stammered out a groan as his mouth attached back on your pussy, slurping up your liquid gold as you attempted to push his head away in overstimulation.
“Oh my- fuck - Simon - too much,” you whimpered your words commanding him to continue as he guzzled around your clit, teeth grazing the sensitive bud as your legs shook uncontrollably.
It wasn’t long before the continuation from your previous orgasm rose again, heat swarming your lower belly as you screamed out, your hand slapping over your mouth as you felt Simon’s spare hand wrap around your thigh, squeezing tightly.
You pulled at his hair, tugging at the ashy roots before you were gushing around his fingers and tongue again, sloshing liquids soaking your sheets as he groaned at the taste, mouth lapping it up with vigour. You whined in humiliation, the overwhelming pleasure becoming too much as you heaved.
“Si - no more -“
“I’m sorry baby, too fucking good. Will never get enough of your pussy.”
His words were filthy yet only held the truth, his continuous slurps against your heat causing your body to jerk as you relentlessly bucked your hips. Simon’s abuse continued on your pussy, your pussy gushing and coming another 6 times before he was satisfied, the sheet under you drenched in both your slick and squirt as Simon milked your overwhelmed cunt, claiming he was “making up for the months lost”.
You were dry heaving, throat dry as he captured your lips in a kiss, the taste of you infiltrating into your glands as you groaned, his hands reaching to tug at your breasts as he took in your fucked out state, legs jiggling and twitching as your pussy convulsed at the number of orgasms he dragged out of you.
You felt like you had been lying here for hours, yet you weren’t satisfied. You would only be content when he was inside you, stretching you to the brim as he pumped a load inside your worn-out hole.
“Simon - please - I can’t… I need you now,” you were practically crying, tears shedding at the brim of your eyes, bottom lip jutting out as he tucked a piece of your hair behind your ear, slicking back the sweat on your forehead.
“I know baby, done so well for Daddy, hm? Even after all that you still need to be plugged full of me don’t you?”
You nodded as a harsh slap landed against your clit, your body jolting as you squeaked. “Yes, please,” you cried, “Please Daddy.”
His hands were like clockwork, tearing at his jeans as they released his cock, a satisfied groan leaving his body as he gripped at the tent in his pants, a sticky wet patch soaking the material before his length throbbed out, angry tip slapping his stomach as a trail of precum glistened against the base of his cock.
His dick was flushed red, begging for release as he ran it through the squelch of your sopping folds, rubbing against your manipulated clit as you moaned.
Your hands gripped his head as he leant down to kiss you, his arm holding him up while the other positioned himself at your entrance. He stilled for a moment, cock almost pressing in before he whispered, “I love you.”
“I love you.”
The words were soft yet meaningful, your eyes interlocked as he began to push inside, your mouth gasping open as you clutched onto his shoulders. It was hard when you were together all those years to get accustomed to his frightening length, and now it had been a year and the stretch was searing through you.
“I know, sweet girl, you can take it. Such a tight cunt for me, so fucking good.”
Fingernails clawed at his back as he pushed in, your whines muffled by the palm of his hand as he held himself up his elbows. “Holy fuck,” he spluttered as he bottomed out, his lips connecting to your neck as he sucked, resting inside you for a second as you whimpered.
The burn slowly faded as you rutted against him impatiently, the tip of his cock resting against your sweet spot as you gasped.
“So fucking impatient, always been such a slut for me. Haven’t you?”
You nodded, whining as he began to move, moving his hips slowly as he rubbed inside you perfectly, your mouth wide open as your head lolled back. A series of expletives tipped from your tongue as you choked on the air, Simon’s pace picking up at your dramatic noises.
“Fuck - taking me so well-“ he grunted, hands groping at your tits as he watched your pussy absorb his length. It was an obscene sight and he loved it. Every fibre of your being belonged to him and it was something he constantly craved.
“All fucking mine - shit - my fucking pussy,” he grunted, thumb rubbing at your clit as you mewled, twitching below him as he spat, “my fucking wife - got the tightest fucking cunt just for me.”
You clenched around him at his words, knowing it was true as his balls slapped against your ass, skin spanking against each other as the sound filled the room, ecstasy roaring through both of your veins as you made love.
The squelch of your pussy was taboo as he lapped in the missed sound. His eyes took in the way your body reacted to every movement, no matter how small. He took in the way your breasts bounced with each thrust, lower stomach bulging as he pounded into you.
“Fuck - Simon - oh my God,” your words were a mere blabber, barely making sense as you clutched onto him, pulling him down to meet your lips.
“I can’t pull out, baby - fuck - gotta cum in this pretty pussy. Give you another kid, hm? - shit -“
His hips didn’t falter as his pace fastened, chasing his own high as he rubbed at your clit, your breaths growing shallow as your orgasm began to build. “Gonna fill you with my cum until it takes. Need your belly round again and your tits full - such a good fucking mum, makes me so fucking proud.”
His words were the final straw as the build up in your stomach popped, your whole body convulsing as your pussy clenched around him, a loud groan leaving his throat before you felt the hot splashes of his cum pumping inside you.
“That’s it baby, milk my cock. Such a good fucking girl for Daddy, gonna break you apart everyday on my cock until you never forget who you belong too.”
He didn’t pull out immediately, his cum plugged inside you as some seeped out, rolling down the crevice of your ass below you. Your eyes shut, gentle pants leaving your lips as you felt Simon’s absence before a soft cloth was wiped gently across your sex and masculine arms were gripping onto you, carrying you into the guest room before engulfing you into a thrill of heat, Simon’s chest against your back as you fell asleep.
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TAGLIST: @kiiwiipie @nijiru
Disclaimer: im sorry if this is disappointing im super tired :(((
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norrisainz33 · 2 months ago
Text
Miami Baby | MV33
☆ summary: actress and avid f1 fan visits the paddock for the first time and she is a certain world champion’s celebrity crush.
☆ pairing: max verstappen x famous!reader x grid!platonic
☆ fc & warnings: suggestive! you are responsible for the content you consume.
☆ requested: nope!!
☆ a/n: this was one of the first fics i ever started writing and just havent had the nerve to post it. this is my first time posting a written and smau fic so bear with me here 🥹
゚. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ゚
ynuser has added to their story
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[story 1: guess what i’m up to this week] [story 2: princess treatment fr 💅🏻]
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user2: MIAMI GRAND PRIX?!
user4: omg are you finally going to a grand prix!!!!???
yourbff: AND SHES DRIVING A FERRARI?!
ynuser: YES!! this is a dream come true
yourbff: i’m so happy for you y/n/n 🤍 FORZA FERRARI!!!!
ynuser: FORZA FERRARI
tomholland2013: Hope you have the best time in Miami!! Z says that you have to come with us to Silverstone tho
ynuser: thank you tommy!! count me in 🫶🏻
user3: MAMA Y MIAMI
user1: car or driver - level impossible
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liked by scuderiaferrari, carlossainz55, sabrinacarpenter, zendaya and 2,657,101 others
ynuser: hot new driver alert, watch out boys! Make sure to catch my hot lap with The Carlos Sainz and say hi if you see me this weekend in Miami 🫶🏻❤️🏎️
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user3: the way she was giggling like a little kid as carlos whipped the car around , oh i love her
user4: no bc she’s finally at a gp living her dreams
user6: she’s literally just another celebrity?
user5: user6 you don’t know the lore! she’s been an f1 fan since before she got famous and she’s been friends with rebecca and alex for quite a while
carlossainz55: had an absolute blast driving with you! looking forward to seeing you this weekend!
ynuser: likewise!!!
scuderiaferrari: bellissima! ready for an exciting weekend ❤️
iamrebeccad: hottest hot lap i’ve ever seen😍😍
maxverstappen1: hot lap with me next
charlesleclerc: since when do you do hot laps?
user8: AM I READING THIS RIGHT
user9: MAX!???????????
user10: i’m sorry is the max verstappen trying to flirt rn
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ynuser: thank you charlie 🫶🏻
charlesleclerc: bien sûr y/n
user3: do you wanna be my chauffeur next?
maxverstappen1: charles you have got to introduce me to her
charleslerclerc: to who?
maxverstappen1: y/n
charlesleclerc: max are you ok?
maxverstappen1: what do you mean??? yes, i am ok??
charlesleclerc: i’m just shocked you willingly want to be introduced to someone??? let alone a celebrity?
maxverstappen1: charles 🙄
maxverstapppen1: she may or may not be my celebrity crush ok
charlesleclerc: ohhh mon ami you should have said that sooner
charlesleclerc: i’ll get alex and rebecca on the case 😉
maxverstappen1: oh god no charles i just meant an introduction i don’t need anyone on the case 😭
user12: 3 pretty best friends
user14: the little matching outfits?! im sick
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user15: you were made to wear ferrari merch
iamrebeccad: can’t wait to show you off to all the other boys 😍
ynuser: but you’re the only one i want 😫
iamrebeccad: i know darling but im not the only one who wants you 😉
ynuser: CRYPTIC what does that mean
alexandrasaintmleux: i’m so glad we finally got you to ferrari mon amour but we should definitely take a walk around the paddock!! you can meet some drivers that aren’t in red - maybe some blue
ynuser: i’ll go anywhere with you
maxverstappen1: i think red bull blue would look better on you
ynuser: blue? perhaps!
user17: begging to know where you got that belt it’s so slay
user22: one of these drivers has got to wife you up you’d be the best wag
user18: can’t wait for all the pictures of you on the grid
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charlesleclerc: find max! he’ll help you get back to ferrari
user14: steal all their notes and bring it to ferrari so we can have a better car
landonorris: come to mclaren its way better here
ynuser: ok then come get me muppet i’m lost 😭
user87: steal one of the cars and give it to carlos!!!
user23: ms girl what are you doing there?? i thought you were supposed to be filming your new movie!
iamrebeccad: 🤭🤭🤭
ynuser: oh so you did this on purpose?
user55: project get ferrari a rocket ship is a go
~~
The pit lane was humming with activity as mechanics and team members alike continued with their duties after a productive qualifying session. You glanced around looking for your friends, alex and rebecca, who had convinced you to take this walk in the first place, but you couldn’t find them in the sea of red bull employees. Letting out a sigh you pulled out your phone hoping to see some sort of reply from either them but there was nothing.
"y/n?" a familiar voice questioned, startling you out of your thoughts. you were met with a confused looking max verstappen and you felt your cheeks heat. max was still in his white fireproofs with his suit pulled down around his waist and you'd be lying if you said he didn't look incredible. you may have accidentally admitted to alex that max was your crush on the grid and you had a sneaking suspicion thats why both her and rebecca magically disappeared leaving you here.
"yes! hi max!!" you said quickly, holding out your hand for him to shake. "it's a genuine honor to meet you!" max looked down at your outstretched hand and paused for a moment before taking it in his own.
his hand engulfed yours as a grin stretched across his face, "the honor is mine, y/n - i'm actually a pretty big fan of yours."
"you are?"
max chuckled, "yes? is that hard to believe?"
"no, no .. i just didn't think you'd know who i was! i mean - im just surprised is all," you said quickly, realizing you were stumbling over your words but max didn't seem to be phased.
"don't be surprised, you are quite talented," max took a sip from his red bull can and you watched as his eyes danced around the pit lane. "do you want an escort back to ferrari?"
"yes, please."
"great, come with me," max rested his hand on the small of your back as he ushered you through the red bull garage and back to the paddock. he made idle chit chat as you tried your very best to focus on anything other than the electricity you could feel from where his hand met the fabric of your dress.
"ahh there you are mon amor!" alex cooed as you and max approached the ferrari hospitality. rebecca looked between you and max with a knowing look on her face. you made a mental note to talk to them both later about how they couldn't just leave you places unattended even if it meant meeting max.
"well would you look at this," charles patted max on the back as he walked past taking his place next to alex. he had a devilish smirk plastered across his handsome features as his eyes travelled between the two of you.
"max was kind enough to help me navigate my way back here after alex and rebecca so sweetly ditched me in the pit lane."
"oh was he now? well then we must repay my dear friend! how about you come to the club with us after the race tomorrow max?" charles looked expectantly at his friend.
max let out a sigh, "i suppose i could be persuaded."
"thats the spirit!" charles clapped his hands together, "i'll text you the details mon ami."
a night club? in miami? with max verstappen? this ought to be interesting.
~~
ynuser has posted multiple stories
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[story 1: race day let’s go] [story 2: im not crying!! YOU are] [story 3: idk if miami can handle us @.alexandrasaintmleux]
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user16: you crying over lando winning his first race is so real
landonorris: i am crying u r right girl
ynuser: as long as ur not cryin in the club
landonorris: not yet !! but the night is young!!
user22: ok body is tea wtf
alexandrasaintmleux: you’re so beautiful i love you so much
ynuser: YOU are so beautiful. i love you more my girl
yourbff: why are you !! a ferrari!!! crying over a mclaren?!
ynuser: bc it’s lando and we love bob in this house
yourbff: ok yeah fine
user12: miami is NOT ready for your hotness that’s for sure
ianrebeccad: ok i need to borrow that outfit from you asap. also pls get to the club faster im stuck here without you both 🥹
ynuser: you’re the one who wanted to “get ready” with carlos and not us soooooo
user44: i’m foaming at the mouth
maxverstappen1: understandable to cry over me not winning
ynuser: i’m glad you get it 😫
user45: that’s not a face card, that’s a whole face economy
user33: who are these divas?
~~
max could feel the music pounding through his chest as his fellow club goers danced to the beat. feeling all sorts of nerves, he brought his gin and tonic to his lips and took a few big gulps hoping the liquid courage would hit him soon. his eyes couldn’t help but follow you as you swayed your entire body to the music without a care in the world. readjusting the hat on his head, he watched as your skirt inched lower on your hips and he could almost feel his mouth start to water.
“max just go and talk to her!” charles yelled over the music pulling max out of his thoughts.
“i can’t.”
“quoi? what do you mean you can’t?”
“she’s just… i just… i can’t!” max finished off his drink and set it down on the table in front of him. “i mean look at her,” max explains throwing his arms up in exasperation, “she’s so beautiful!! i’m not sure i’d even know what to say.”
“just ask her to dance or to get another drink!” charles looked over to you, alex and rebecca as you danced with carlos and lando.
“i can’t.”
“max - if you don’t i guarantee someone else is going to try and make a move on her.” charles was now staring max down with a scowl on his face, “and i know that would upset you more than just growing some balls and talking to her!”
max frowned, realizing his friend was right. “i’m just scared she won’t like me.”
“i have insider knowledge that says she fancies you.”
max’s eyes widened, “and you didn’t lead with that?”
“no because i wasn’t supposed to tell you!! now please for the love of god let’s go get her.”
max and charles navigated their way through the sea of bodies until they made it to your little group. you looked up at max with a bright smile and he felt the butterflies in his stomach intensify. before he lost all of his nerve, he blurted out “get a drink with me?”
you nodded, “i’d love to!” max smiled and grabbed your hand so that he wouldn’t lose you in the mass of people.
there was very little available space at the bar which left you leaning against the counter and max directly behind you leaning against you so that he could hear the bartender. not a single coherent thought was going through your head, all you could focus on was the way max’s body rested against yours, the warmth it offered you, the way he was resting his strong hands on either side of you and how if you turned you’d be face to face and able to kiss him right on—
max tapped on your shoulder pulling you out of your thoughts and earning a slight jump from you. “the bartender asked what you wanted to drink, y/n” max explained into your ear causing goosebumps to spread like wild fire across your skin.
the bartender was looking at you expectantly, “oh! i’ll take a gin and tonic please!!” you panic ordered not being able to come up with anything else on the spot. “so sorry,” you quickly added as the bartender turned to make your drink. mentally you scolded yourself for not being able to get it together but boy was keeping it together hard when the max verstappen was very much taking up your personal space.
after thanking the bartender for your drinks, max took a step back allowing you to turn and look at him. he was in a pair of his classic skinny jeans, a backwards black cap, a black tshirt that hugged his arms perfectly and he wore a soft smile as he looked down at you with his big blue eyes. “wanna dance?” you asked before taking a gulp of your drink.
max’s grin grew, “absolutely.” you decided not to give him any time to reconsider and instead grabbed his hand and drug him out to the dance floor. you could feel eyes on you both but you didn’t care. “i should likely preface this with the fact that i’m not much of a dancer,” max admitted sheepishly. he was taking note of how close you both were now. you had stopped rather abruptly in the middle of the dance floor leaving him so close to you that he could steal your breath if he really wanted and oh boy did he want to.
you laughed effortlessly, “everyone is a dancer if they try hard enough, max!" The DJ began playing a remix of one of your favorite songs and max watched intently as you began moving to the music. He threw back the remainder of his drink and made quick work of discarding it, feeling more courageous now.
you quickly noticed max was still very much standing completely still. “it’s all in the hips,” you cooed putting your free hand on his hips and pushing him so he would move. max obliged and began swinging his hips back and forth timidly, not having a ton of room to move out at the center of the dance floor. "atta boy!" you praised giving him a smirk.
max almost choked on air at that comment from you — what could he say? he was a sucker for praise and that comment gave him the confidence he needed to place both hands on your hips and pull you in so that your body fit snuggly against his own. max had a feeling that this was going to be a very good night.
~~
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f1gossip: last night max verstappen and actress y/n y/l/n were seen attending a party with many of the grid members. they seem to have gotten very cozy out on the dance floor sharing quite a few kisses. it’s also reported that the pair were seen leaving together at the end of the night.
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user1: OMG WHAT MY WORLDS COLLIDING
user2: nah he looks so fine in that hat omg
user8: i knew him offering that hot lap had to mean something
user6: they’re both so hot i’m sure their night was … actually imma stop myself before i get banned
user3: this was orchestrated by alex and rebecca i just know it
user8: i could see charles and lando getting in on it too tbh
user4: jealousy doesn’t look pretty on me but dear lord am i jealous
user5: he may have bagged the baddest baddie alive.. how did he manage that in those skinny jeans
user4: listen those skinny jeans make his thighs look real biteable
user5: and you got me there
user9: need more max and y/n content asap
゚. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ゚
a/n: thank you for reading!! likes and reblogs are very much appreciated 🤍
゚. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ゚
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