#just like this shit is super complicated in real life

[oversensitiveandoffputting]

I wonder if the reason why Stolas is so blind to the class dynamic between him and Blitz is because he doesn’t feel like he benefits from it.

Work with me here. I’m not saying it’s true. I’m saying this may be how he feels.

You know those white people that say that they can’t have white privilege because they’re struggling to pay the rent? Maybe Stolas has a mindset something similar to that.

When you think royalty, you think strength and power. Stolas has neither. In terms of raw physical strength, Stolas is weaker among the Goetia. With his looks, he’s lanky and thin. “I’m so glad I don’t have to pretend to want to fuck his scrawny, twig ass.” (Stella I hate you so much). We know as the audience that it takes an insurmountable amount of strength to survive, umm, let’s see, let me check the list: missing mother, neglectful father, extreme isolation as a child, being a closeted gay man, an arranged marriage, marital rape, domestic violence, and being a teen father.

Yeah, I would have offed myself at number five.

But to Stolas, having to take SSRIs and having mental health issues is something he most likely is deeply ashamed of. Something he thinks of as a weakness.

In terms of power, he’s never had any power to control his own life. From the moment he was born, his destiny was written for him, no deviation allowed. “It is expected an oath by blood to hold the tome and the starlight passes overhead fuels all the skills I've honed. I am a guardian, a watcher of these ancient rites.” He has no power over who or when or if he commits himself to one person for the rest of his very, very long life. He has no power over Stella to make her stop abusing him. He has no power over his own brain to make him stop being suicidal.

In his mind, the idea that he benefits at all from his station is ludicrous. ‘Where is this privilege?’ He’s probably thinking to himself. ‘I don’t even get to choose who I marry, when I have children, what job I have, who I get to love, whether I make friends, how I can express my emotions, nothing. I choose nothing.’

And honestly? He’s not right…but he’s also not wrong.

There is something deeply fucked up about how the system has taken a cute, happy bird just excited to learn about his future on his birthday and chewed him up before spitting him out into a severely depressed alcoholic with C-PTSD and recovering from an assassination attempt.

It’s not that he doesn’t benefit from his status compared to other demons. He does. He has servants and can get an appointment for a hospital visit at any time and he’s welcome in any club he goes to and he’s never had to worry about whether he’ll have a roof over his head or food on the table. But compared to the standards set by the people around him? The idea is laughable. Offensive. Where is this privilege? He’s not seeing it.

And like the white people who claim that they can’t have white privilege because they struggle to pay the rent, we want to pull our hair out and scream because “holy shit how can you be this stupid?!”

But they have legitimate complaints about a system that chewed them up and spit them out. And so does Stolas.

[holyviolence]

omg i spent the whole day cleaning my entire apartment because my family was coming to visit and 1) so so so happy my adhd is being medicated now it's literally changing my life and 2) i FINALLLY got through to my dad about how he probably has ADHD too!!!!! he finally said Yeah i think i might have adhd. and my mom was like Me too (we've had this talk privately before, she knows she has adhd too lol) And my brother is literally transferring to a different school because he can't concentrate and isn't disciplined at his current uni. adhd family.

[meiiie]

dave lizewski, i’m so into you. (pt. 2)

summary: you say something unexpected about Kick-Ass while discussing with your friends which hero you prefer the most.. Kick-Ass? Or Red Mist? little did Dave know or so you thought, you knew it was him all along..

a/n: i have an OC named Melilah who will be your best friend in this imagine, this only has fluff and comedy, there are some inappropriate jokes, and thats it i think! i also didn't proofread this so like... yeah happy reading :)

(pairing: dave lizewski x fem!reader) link to pt. 1

word count: 1.6k

now playing: boyfriend (with Social House)

♫ 'Cause I know we be so complicated But we be so smitten, it's crazy I can't have what I want, but neither can you ♫

the lyrics echoing throughout the store,

“well- for one i think Kickass is wayy cuter, i’d fuck his brains out if i got the chance.” you say out of your thoughts completely regretting saying the said statement- “Really?” Dave says out of nowhere, observing the conversation from behind your booth.

♫ But you ain't my boyfriend (Boyfriend) And I ain't your girlfriend (Girlfriend) But you don't want me to touch nobody else (Nobody) Baby, we ain't gotta tell nobody ♫

“okay wrap it up you two.” Todd interrupts

you really didn't know what to do at that point, i mean- what else would you do?

Dave takes a seat beside you—you think to yourself, 'ah, so this is what Todd and Marty were planning…' ...not knowing your best friend was in on it too

Melilah was rambling something about Red Mist to Todd and Marty, you couldn't care less since it wasn't about Kick-Ass “what you said, did you mean it?” Dave asking you, you almost break your neck by looking at him “wait- what yes what no, huh?”

Dave tilts his head looking confused at your reply, chuckling a bit “well, maybe, i guess? i mean, who wouldn't want to…?” you say nervously, your palms and toes are practically sweating at his question

“so, uh is that why you've been avoiding me these past few days? because you find Kick-Ass more attractive than me?” smirking in attempt to tease you, but you didn't take the hint, and instead you fumble on your words by saying “no- you are very attractiv- i mean, Kick-Ass is very attractive, well- not really? i keep my options open” you sigh trying to catch your breath, but Dave doesn't look the slightest upset. instead he was just looking at you in amusement, recalling the previous days.

4 days earlier

“how come nobody has ever tried to be a superhero?” Dave asks Todd and Marty sitting at the same booth spot, “boy.. i dunno! probably because it's fucking impossible, dipshit!” Marty says while Todd just laughs “what? putting a mask and helping people, how's that impossible?” Dave says trying to defend his question

“that's not superhero, though. how's that super? super's like being stronger than everybody and flying and shit. that's just hero” Todd explains

“no, it's not even hero. it's just fucking psycho.”

Dave Lizewski knew at that moment that his goal was to become the first real life superhero. as soon as Dave opened his parcel for his Kick-Ass 'superhero suit', he goes to find his first mission as a superhero, which was to fight bad guys right? haaah.... that actually didn't turn out so well- *PUNCH*

“AHHHHH” Dave screams after making 4 guys faint that were trying to beat up a guy in front of the convenience store, “what the fuck just happened.” he says assessing the situation he was just in. he looks around his surroundings and realize the amount of people recording the fight “holy shit, I DID IT!” he shouts at the top of his lungs, he just felt so unstoppab- “AHHHHHHHH” Dave screams, again but IN TERROR. he was just about to fall off a ledge, barely hanging on. who knew saving a cat would be this hard? "FUCK YOU MR. BITEY!" *THUD*

Dave hits the ground, HARD. “aggghh.. FUCK.” he checks whether his back was okay-then if his phone was fine or not. looking at his screen & it was ALMOST 7PM. “shit, it's almost past my curfew! i cannot STAND pretending to be like i'm some sort of superhero anymore.” he stomps on the ground walking fast into a dark alleyway, he notices there was someone standing beside the lamp pole but who cares. all he could think of was giving up, what kind of superhero would be able to beat up 4 guys but can't even save a CAT? he removes his mask out of frustration, partially still angry at Mr. Bitey, but then a faint gasp is heard—his eyes darting towards the pole. it was you. sounds of quick footsteps tip-tap-tip-tap quickly fading away. "WAIT!-" Dave shouts, “i- oh god..”

it was the next day in school, he already saw how the videos from the convenience store was spreading in the news, but most importantly was what did you think? "hey y/n-" you quickly pass by him in the halls, his heart stung at the sight of you trying to ignore him. during classes, he would be staring at you- like, FULL BLOWN staring at you with such sadness in his eyes. what he felt for you was different, he didn't know what it was. before you both became friends, he would always notice the little details about you during class.

you were always fidgeting with your pencil, or doodling on your notebook, the way you squint your eyes at the white board when you couldn't see what the teacher wrote, he found you so endearing. after being paired up to work on a major project for one of your classes, it was like he won the entire universe. so now seeing you ignore him made it feel like his life just crumbled apart

"are you sure this is going to work? i don't think y/n is going to fall for this, you always come to the hangouts its going to be obvious that we're lying…"

"dude, you should just talk to her and ask her whats up? what'd you even do to make her avoid you man??"

"stop it- it's, privat-"

"oh my god. they probably kissed and she ran away because Dave was a shitty kisser ohhhhh GOD. i can envision it! why did you have to do that????"

"first of all, we did not kiss. AND I AM A GOOD KISSER! i just need Melilah to convince y/n to hang out with you guys in Comic Atomics but tell her that i'm not coming, then i'll hide behind the booth then just ask her what she thinks about Kick-Ass-"

"why does it have to be specifically Kick-Ass though..?" the three of them look at Dave expecting an answer, Dave really wanted to know what you thought about him- well, about his alter ego, Kick-Ass, but you couldn't just tell your friends that was the reason

"guys... just do this... for me... as a friend.. I swear i'll pay you guys back- ANYTHING."

"anything?"

"anything."

Dave slowly watches the conversation unfold in front of him, “guys what do you think of Kickass?” Melilah asks subtly looking at Dave behind you to wonder if she's following the plan right. Todd and Marty then expressed who they liked more, which was Red Mist which lowkey made Dave sad but once he heard your reply his eyes saw stars, the whole world, the universe, his whole life was lifted- “well- for one i think Kickass is wayy cuter, i’d fuck his brains out if i got the chance.” you say, your words were ECHOING IN HIS BRAIN.... 'she... thinks... i'm cute...wait...SHE'DFUCKME?'

"Really?" he says, trying to keep his cool when in reality he was screaming internally.

during the whole hangout you could feel Dave's stares at you, grinning like he was the luckiest man alive yet you both weren't even together "jeez man stop glaring at her, you're going to make her run away again!" Melilah pointed out keeping the rest of the time there light, and your worries were all gone.

it was almost 5pm when you all said your goodbyes, "can I walk you home?" Dave asked, hoping for you to say yes "yeah, i'd like that." the walk home was silent but the silence was, comforting. "you know about it, don't you?" you pretend to look confused at his question "oh don't pretend now.." he said, you both started giggling

"well what do i know Mr. Lizewski?"

"maybe the fact that you saw me falling from a height in attempt to save a cat, perhaps?"

"oh that was you?" you jokingly say, he stopped walking in his tracks- baffled

"PFFT i was just kidding- come here" you both walk towards your house, walking at the same footstep rate. still laughing, reminiscing what happened. "for what its worth, i think it was cool that you tried saving... what's the name? Mr. Bitey? that was very brave of you" you chuckled. you both finally arrived at your front yard "well, why thank you y/n. i think it was very brave of you as well to follow the green stranger"

your laughs died down while you both looked into each other's eyes, he's admiring your features and you're admiring his. it was silent for a few seconds until he asked, "why'd you runaway? why'd you avoid me?" you didn't know what to say, while avoiding his eyes you say "i was scared, i was contemplating my.." you sigh while he looks at you with hopeful eyes. "i discovered that i like yo-" he cuts you off, feeling the warmth of his lips while he hugs your waist. you both begin to laugh again, his hands still around your waist. "i liked you ever since-" he says until you both hear your name being shouted from your house

"Y/N I KNEW IT!!! I KNEW YOU WERE ALWAYS WITH THAT PRETTY BOY!!!"

"MOM I SWEAR ITS NOT WHAT YOU THINK IT IS!!!" you peck his cheek, you whisper a quick 'i’msointoyo- imeantalktoyoutomorrowbye' winking back at him while running back into your house "moooommm let me explain wait-"

Dave turns around, starstruck, walks away feeling fulfilled. he didn't need to become a superhero, you were already one to him

a/n: ok i kinda cringed typing the last part but i ran out of ideas 🫠 thanks for reading!

[tavina-writes]

I have been pondering the recent rash of "post canon NHS and LXC would never ever reconcile bc even if NHS wanted to have Er-ge back, LXC would never ever forgive him for [insert reason of choice here]" type of posts + the "do you think NHS thinks very hard about how much Da-ge would hate him for becoming [the way that he is now] by choosing to seek vengeance" type of posts, and I think fundamentally the reason these posts do not jive with me is that we have no indication, in the show or in the book that uh, NHS gives a shit about either of these things very much anymore?

The first type of post is predicated on the assumption that LXC's forgiveness or lack thereof some some sort of either extension of mercy (which NHS obviously does not deserve <- or so assumes the post) or some form of punishment (which is obviously the correct answer) but the last scene we get with NHS both in the book and the show make no indication that this is a thing he wants? Or cares about? Book NHS has *sauntered off* with his little hat trophy and Show NHS walks off screen after saying something along the lines of "What is my responsibility I won't shirk, what isn't my responsibility I won't care about." Now, arguably, show NHS is having a worse go of it emotionally, but shows no real inclination or interest in either apologies or making up and being friends again with LWJ, LXC, WWX, or other people. Book NHS seems pretty pleased with the outcome of the events as a whole?

The second type of post is predicated on the fact that NHS finds Da-ge's judgement a horrible burden to bear at this stage in the game, which! He might! But again especially in the book we get no indication that he has any fucks left to give about what Da-ge may or may not have wanted since Da-ge is dead. In both the show and the book, NHS went about revenge taking very specific and complicated actions with the desired result of JGY dying, but he certainly took the scenic route getting there, which, he didn't need to? As I've written about before, JGY didn't see him as a threat. If he wanted JGY dead he could've arranged to poison JGY's tea like, 10 years ago and had done with it instead of his complicated Rube Goldberg life ruining scheme. If he is still sickly anxious about how Da-ge might feel about the scheming and the trouble causing and the whole everything, that's certainly possible, but he must've decided it was worth it anyway regardless of that, and I don't know that it necessarily would've changed just because he got what he wanted at the end.

Overall, I think as a fandom we think a lot about like "will and should this relationship ever be repaired or similar to how it used to be?" and "does this character deserve/not deserve the forgiveness of people they've hurt or abandoned?" which can be interesting questions! I do feel like these are often taken as "is a character morally good (deserves to be forgiven) or morally bad (deserves to rot in hell forever never forgiven ever ever)" and based entirely on if Character is the meta writer's blorbo. Under this paradigm the concept of "Character did bad things to get exactly what they wanted and were happy about that and no relationships were ever repaired and the emotional detachment of people they used to care about no longer matters to them!" is uncomfortable.

It's just that for NHS I've increasingly come to the conclusion that canonically, I don't think NHS thinks he has anything to apologize for, nor is he super interested in being forgiven! He got what he wanted the way he wanted it to happen. Which is potentially supremely unsatisfying but I think is very sexy as a narrative concept.

[topazadine]

Okay, okay, here's perhaps my spiciest and most controversial take yet.

Now, before I even say anything, please note that I am talking specifically about fantasy. Not retellings of myths, not historical fiction set in different countries, nothing like that. This is for second-world fantasy, where you're creating a whole different world.

Ready?

Stop making everything so damn complicated!

This is not to say that you can't have a rich and exciting world filled with lore, religion, different societies, traditions, unique geographies. Not that. Of course we want that: it's the whole reason we read fantasy. I'm talking about something else.

This is my simple takedown, and you can read the rest to better understand what I mean:

Stop jamming your story with five billion weird words.

Don't use super complicated nouns.

Keep the characters to a minimum so we can know and like them.

Don't yammer on about all the backstory.

Stop making readers do homework just to understand things.

Focus on the feeling a story gives instead of the intricate worldbuilding.

And lastly, a pre-emptive note to those who are putting their hackles up and telling me why they are an exception.

Why is it important to keep things simple?

A lot of people shy away from fantasy because they assume that every fantasy story is going to be so complicated that their head will hurt. Not in terms of plot - many people like complicated plots - but in terms of terminology and history. Things that ultimately don't really matter to the plot.

We as writers often assume that everyone cares about our story as much as we do and is equally captivated by every detail. This is simply not true.

To your reader, your story is not their life's work: it is entertainment that they want to be able to enjoy at their leisure. It's a distraction from their difficult lives and all their real-world frustrations. If they get really into it and, say, write fanfic or whatever, that's amazing! But they're not likely to do that if they feel like they'll be jumped on for doing something wrong or that they have to include every single little detail.

For example, I wrote over 1 million words of Touken Ranbu fanfic. Touken Ranbu, at its heart, has a very simple premise: you've got a bunch of legendary swords that were turned into hot men and fight evil time-traveling monsters. You can understand it with just that. There are layers to it, though, that you can slowly untangle. That makes for good writing because it works on multiple levels depending on how much you care about it.

I would have given up on the story if I felt like I needed a dictionary just to understand the plot. Most people would. Language needs to be accessible and premises need to be clear, or no one is going to want to go deeper.

Subtle little details that people can pick up are way more enjoyable than tossing every single factoid at people so that they feel overwhelmed and can't think. It's wonderful to have rich layers of symbolism, mythology, etc. That's excellent. But you can only get people to care about those things if they can actually comprehend your damn story.

A lot of the things that turn people off from fantasy are all about a writer's ego, and it oozes through the work. People can tell that you're wanting them to pat you on the back for putting so much shit in your story. It's annoying and a total turn-off when you make readers work so hard to comprehend what you're saying.

So what exactly am I talking about? This.

Using made-up terms for everything that could easily be explained with a normal English word

When I am writing fantasy, I imagine myself as a translator. After all, my made-up societies have their own made-up language (Seinish) that is referenced a few times.

However, I'm not using Seinish words all the time. I'm writing in English. I didn't write out a Seinish dictionary or even come up with most of the terms because, honestly? Most readers don't care. They want to understand what's going on in as simple of terms as possible, with only a few specific terms that remind us that we're somewhere different.

I may use some specialized terminology, but it's always couched in context clues that make us aware of what it is without actually having to just say "sdlkjfslkdjf, also known as a marketplace."

For example, in The Eirenic Verses, the High Poet Society has religious centers called meronyms. (Which actually isn't a made-up word.) We know they're religious centers because we see all the religious leaders living there. Someone sees the term "meronym" and goes "oh yeah, that's the religious place" and moves on.

It's one of the only confusing, specialized terms in the book other than place names, which people expect whenever they're reading fantasy. Because of that, it stands out and is easy to remember. It's not one of 1029310283012830132 different terms someone has to remember in order to follow along.

Even Tolkien, famed for literally writing an entire extra book full of lore for his stories, doesn't really use that much specialized terminology except for place names. My favorite author, China Mieville, only uses specialized terminology for things that have absolutely no basis in our reality and that can't be explained otherwise. And he's an extremely eloquent guy who uses the weirdest words possible whenever he can. If he can write a book that's mostly comprehensible without a cheat sheet, you can too.

If there is an English term for what you are trying to explain, just use that, for the love of god. The point of writing a story is not to show how smart and special you are: it is to tell a story. You need to remove as many barriers to access as possible.

Things that get a pass and can be made up most, if not all, of the time:

Place names (as in specific places, not categories of things)

Peoples' names

Languages

Species that don't exist in our world

Modes of transportation that don't exist in our world

Magic that can't be explained in any other way

Technology that can't be defined by our language

Look, if you have an animal that is basically a dragon, just call it a dragon. If you've got a wheeled carriage, call it a carriage. Call earth magic something based in earth terms, like "terravitae" or something, idk. There should be some connection to our world in your terminology because you are writing this in English for an English-speaking audience.

It doesn't make you a lazy writer, it makes you one that wants people to understand what you're talking about. Again, imagining yourself as a translator is a good way to keep yourself from going ham on the nouns.

Proper nouns that are way too complicated

Let's look at some well-known proper nouns from fantasy.

Middle Earth

Narnia

Earthsea

Discworld

Westeros

Ankh-Morpork

Bas-Lag

Wonderland

They're all ... simple. They're not a million syllables with weird intonations and accents and all that. If you showed this to a medieval peasant, they'd probably be able to pronounce them and would likely understand that they were place names.

Unless there's a good reason to have a weird name, don't use one. Come up with something simpler.

All of these I mentioned are three syllables or less, making them easier to remember. In fact, I'd argue that nearly every proper noun in your book should be no more than three syllables. Maybe one or two four-syllable ones.

Any very weird name should be balanced out by several easier ones so that it stands out.

40 million characters

Younger writers often want their world to feel very lived in, so they introduce dozens of characters with their own names, descriptions, backstories, etc etc etc. The problem is that this is a huge mental load on your reader, especially if a lot of the characters have very similar names. It makes reading your stuff into a chore rather than an enjoyable experience.

Now, some literary greats do have a lot of characters. But they get away with it because they're great.

I'm not great, so I don't do that.

I'd also suggest that you don't do that, regardless of how good you think you are.

To see if you have too many chracters, write out a dramatis personnae and rank it in terms of importance. Does your top tier have like 15 characters? Cut some. Figure out where they are in the story and if they don't exist for more than a few pages, delete them. Absorb them into someone else.

If a character is only in one scene, don't bother naming them. They don't matter enough. This reduces the cognitive load for your reader because they can see that character for what they are: a background person who exists only briefly.

Any time you name a character, they need to have deep plot relevance. The more unusual your character's name, the more important they should be. And they should have some sort of relationship to another character, preferably the main character. Otherwise, why are they there? Why do we care? Go away!

Way too much backstory

I am an adult and my brain is filled with 50 million other things. I have to remember stuff for my job, I have a to-do list, I have family I care about who needs me.

Your story is not the end-all be-all of my existence. Hell, my story is not the end-all be-all of my existence either. I want to be able to pick up your book, understand what's going on, and then delve a bit deeper or even make up my own headcanons.

I do not need the entirety of your story's world thrown at me right off the bat. It is overwhelming and tiring. Imagine if you visited a different country and someone immediately came up to you and started spewing the whole history of the country right after you stepped off the plane. That's what you're doing to your readers!

Think also about how you approach your everyday world. Do you reel off a million facts about your personal history the instant you meet someone? No, of course not. It'd be weird and creepy.

Are you constantly recalling facts about your city while walking down the street? Do you even know any major facts about your city? You probably know a few little trivia points and that's it. Because it's not relevant to you, and it's not relevant to your readers, either. I can't recall off the top of my head when Cleveland was settled, but I can tell you that we have the world's first Dunkleosteus fossil in our museum, because that is interesting to me. That's the kind of thing that makes a place feel lived-in, not four hundred thousand pages of exposition about the place's history.

Give your readers time to settle in, and reveal things slowly as they make sense. Maybe we hear a little bit about the country's government as they pass a parliament house, or because they have to visit the city center for a different reason. If it's not pertinent to the current scene, then don't put it there.

I've got tons of lore for my world. Some of it may be referenced one singular time, and some of it may be never referenced at all. That's okay, because it's just for me to get a better sense of the place I created. If a reader doesn't need it, then I don't bother putting it in, because it might detract from their enjoyment.

Overall: stop making your readers do homework!

We do not want our readers to feel like they are working when they are reading our stuff. Excellent writers can infuse deep themes and symbology into their stories without making it feel like work. These are the writers who are remembered forever, because not only have they made a good story that you can enjoy at a surface level, but they have also twined in deeper themes that you can dive into after you've digested the story.

I did my undergrad in British literature, so I read a lot of Shakespeare and contemporaneous authors. Shakespeare is considered complicated by modern standards because of the Elizabethan language, but if you translated it into modern terms, his stories are simple. People betray each other and stab each other, or fuck each other, or get transported to weird magical worlds.

You could watch a Shakespeare play and think absolutely nothing of the themes, but still enjoy the story. You could know absolutely nothing about Greek history and still get the gist.

This is because Shakespeare specifically wrote his plays to appeal to a mass audience. He was a god-tier author when it came to balancing symbology and plot. To be like Shakespeare, be simple. Remember that your reader does. not. really. care. all that much. They don't.

It's very unlikely that your writing is going to become someone's life's work and they're going to spend their whole existence studying. Cool if true, but unlikely.

Your job is to make a story that people like and want to read. Only when you've gotten people liking and reading do you get permission to go ham with the backstory and the characterization and the weird names, because they trust you to create a story that they will like. Otherwise, your primary objective is making people feel things so they want to feel more things and read more stories.

People care more about how a story makes them feel than the specifics

Yes, of course there are outliers to this who really want every single detail of the world, but those are few and far between. You should not tailor your story to these exceptions. Think about the average everyday person.

I have many books that I love, but I can't tell you everything about them now. I can, however, tell you how I felt when I was reading them: the plot twists that made me gasp, the thing that made me cry. I can give you a general, sweeping impression of whether I liked or disliked the story and what made me feel something. This is what people recommend books based on: how they felt.

Your story should focus on the plot and the emotion. People watch movies, listen to music, read books, or look at art to feel something, not to memorize factoids for later usage. Even if they do want to memorize factoids, they won't do that if they haven't built an emotional connection to the story.

While in life, we want facts over feelings, it's opposite in creative writing. We want feelings over facts. The emotional resonance, the mood, the characters, the plot: that is what is important, not showing off how smart you are and how much you have thought about your story.

"But Topazadine, I am special and different! I'm not going to follow your advice."

Sure. Go ahead. I can't stop you. If you want to have a million characters and an entire dictionary to explain everything, that is your choice.

No one can tell you how to write; my advice is just advice.

If you don't like what I have said here, then feel free to ignore it. You don't need to justify it to me or anyone else.

However, you must recognize that this may not resonate with readers. It will turn people off.

I'm not a completionist, and neither are many others; they'll roll their eyes and click out when they are faced with ten pages of character names upfront.

Of course you should always write for yourself first, but if you are planning to write fiction for any level of commercial appeal and you intend to make any amount of money on your work, then audience does matter. If you want kudos or comments on your AU, audience matters. You won't get engagement if you are alienating people.

Your writing decisions are always your own and no one can demand you do something different. You just need to decide whether your personal satisfaction in writing your story in a certain way outweighs your desire for validation, and, perhaps, money. I can't tell you the answer for that; it's up to you.

If you enjoyed this, maybe you'll consider reading my fantasy book, 9 Years Yearning, which does not have 121238103 characters and 3230123 strange words. It does, however, have double-tsundere-mutual-pining-gay-boy-awakening. And horses. It's also just $3.

[hollowed-theory-hall]

Hi! I love your theories, and I spent too long reading everything I could find on your blog on Harry and V specifically, and bc I fell into a ship hole and can't seem to get out, here's a random question for you! Do you ship Tomarry or Harrymort in any way? Is it believable for you that it could happen? I mean, most of the time people tend to ship hermione with Tom Riddle, with the excuse that she's super smart, but I think Tom Riddle would despise her actually. Harry's not book smart, but he's very intuitive, he's clever and he's cunning, they could fit I think 🤔. Also they have shit lives, and they've been through similar things (not everything), and that'd enable them to understand each other and all. And Harry is annoyingly stubborn, so Tom/V would have a hard time manipulating him or forcing him by other means (like spells or potions), and he's observant and suspicious enough to notice random little clues and trusts his instincts so he wouldn't be blindly in love either? Sorry I'm rambling, I'd like to hear your thoughts about this if you have some? (If you don't ship it, no problem, I don't want to come across as if I'm trying to rant or complain or anything)

Have a good day!!

Thank you so much 🥰

As with all ship asks, ship whatever you ship and have fun, these are just my subjective opinions. Also, no, you don't come across as complaining.

So, real talk, I do enjoy tomarry/harrymort. This ship has some of the most well-written fics I came across in all my various fandoms and it has a special place in my heart. But my thoughts on this pairing are complicated.

To summarise I think this pair can be narrativly delicious. We got distorted parallel mirrors, both of them outright say how much they understand each other, how they know each other better than anyone else. They are narrative foils in many ways, having similar enough backgrounds but making different choices leading down different paths. It also helps these two are in my top 5 favorite characters in the series, so pairing them up is somewhat natural since it gets interesting results.

But, I don't think canon Harry and Tom/Voldemort would actually work as a couple realistically (or at least in a healthy way). Like, even without their history and specific circumstances in the story, ignoring everything and just thinking about how I see their personalities, I think they'd get on each other's nerves if they tried to date. They'd try to kill each other, completely independent of any prophecy.

Now to make a short story long:

(I'll be using the name "Tom" but it refers to Tom at any stage in his life)

First, yes, they do understand each other and have the potential for really seeing each other in a way that others rarely see them. I mean, Harry has Ron and Hermione, but they don't get it the way Tom would. They don't understand loneliness and abuse the way someone who lived through it would. I mean, these two clearly don't know what to do when Harry jokes about ducking his uncle's fists besides looking at him with concern. With Tom, Harry wouldn't have to worry about this. Tom would also not be concerned about Harry's darker more ruthless tendencies, allowing Harry to actually be Harry.

Tom, for his part, is a very lonely character who is looking for companionship and compassion, two things Harry can give. But Tom is unyielding in basically everything, he is incredibly prideful and independent. While he wants a connection, he doesn't really know how to trust and open up, to give a bit of himself that is necessary for relationships which is going to be a struggle for them.

Harry is one of the only characters (if not the only one) Tom sees as an equal or a potential equal. Tom really doesn't respect many people (regardless of blood or magical skill) but he does grow to respect and even fear Harry by book 7. This respect is important for any relationship, but especially when it comes to Tom Riddle, who just wouldn't really take anyone lesser than him seriously. And he thinks 99% of beings are lesser than him, so, that's a point in their favor.

Additionally when we think of the narrative, like, god, this can be juicy. We have two powerful and capable individuals who are basically bound together on every possible level. They are bound by magic, having brother wands that actively don't want to fight each other. They are bound by fate with a prophecy interwinding their lives together. After Tom's resurrection, they are bound by blood and they are bound by soul due to Harry being Tom's Horcrux. They literally share a soul, like, that's insane. They share dreams and memories and get each other in a way few could.

And they are very fixated on each other and can't really escape the other's influence. Tom is obsessed with killing Harry and no one but him is allowed to do it. He even goes as far as stipulating he wants to kill Harry while dueling him properly when Harry has his wand. This is something that shows, again, his respect for Harry. And Harry sees dealing with Voldemort as his responsibility. Tom Riddle is his to deal with and no one else's.

Like, it lends itself to a very dramatic very entertaining story naturally. A messy one for sure, but fun.

All that being said, when I actually think about how I see their respective personalities and what they would want/need from a relationship, I don't think they are very compatible below the surface.

Yes, Tom needs someone who he'll respect, but that partner needs to have some (a lot of) give. They need to be able to work around Tom's 10 million personality complexes without him feeling like he is being fixed. Tom needs to feel like he is getting his way, so his potential partner needs to either be very subtle or put a lot of effort into making Tom dateable (which I talked about more here). The thing is, Harry is just as stubborn and unrelenting as Tom more often than not. These two both have the same complex from a lack of control over their lives in childhood that results in very stubborn people who will fight tooth and nail to get their way and a general distrust of people. This is a recipe for them butting heads often, especially with their different worldviews and how they see people.

Like, both of them would never bow down to anyone. They don't know how to take a backseat. Sure, Harry says he doesn't want all the danger and attention, and he doesn't, but he would be able to sit and do nothing against what he feels is wrong, he is used to carrying an impossible burden on his shoulders. And he takes a leadership rule easily and naturally. Tom is used to getting his way, he is used to being able to either intimidate or charm what he wants out of everyone, something his partner should be immune to, but I think Harry would rile him up worse, instead of putting a stop to the behavior. Like, Tom would just try harder to break Harry before trying something else would cross his mind because Harry would make a sassy comment that would get Tom emotionally invested. He's going to get his pride and self-worth hinging on breaking Harry's resolve, and he is going to fail. Neither of them would ever be happy in the shadow of the other and it's going to be a constant push and pull with these too. Now, this sort of dynamic can be very compelling in fic, it's a fun story about a relationship that is truly insufferable to be around.

Neither of them is particularly emotionally intelligent or capable of emotional vulnerability. Like, Harry, who didn't know why Cho was crying after Cedric died, would need to be the person carrying the emotional tool in this relationship, and, like, I love Harry, but navigating emotionally volatile situations (specifically romantic ones) is not one of his many skills. Tom is even more useless in this department, he sure can recognize emotions in others, but he repeatedly underestimates emotional attachment, both in himself and others because his conceptions about friendship and love are all skewered. And with romance, he would be so much worse.

Add to all of that the fact both of them have one hell of a temper and it's more likely that they'd blow up at each other rather than talk shit out.

And then there is how I think they'll behave when they actually are in a relationship. As I talked about here, Tom is a sentimental and possessive person. When it comes to romance, I think Tom would want a person to be his, he'd be obsessed and controlling while simultaneously wanting to remain independent and do his own thing. He'd be a nightmare. And Harry, well, Harry would handle the independent, doing his own thing quite well, since I think Harry is the same. Even in a relationship, he'd need to keep his own independence and freedom, and that's where Tom's controlling nature is going to butt heads with Harry's distaste for any controlling figure.

I think Tom would struggle with Harry's lack of ambition too. Because Harry is clever, powerful, has the makings of greatness, and is an equal to Tom, but he isn't planning on doing anything with it. This would infuriate Tom, honestly. I think Tom would find many of Harry's passions (like Quidditch) frivolous and useless and would probably tell him that, which Harry would fight him on.

Harry's sassy nature, would also, get under Tom's skin if it's directed at him, Tom takes himself too seriously to make fun of himself and take a joke. However, he would appreciate these same comments when directed at others. Tom has a sense of humor, but he wouldn't make fun of himself, especially not a younger Tom Riddle when he's still in school.

There are aspects that would work, though, I think Harry would be willing to listen to Tom going on about whatever quite intently, and Tom would love that. Harry can pay a lot of attention to people he cares about, but he can also get distracted and just not hear anything being said to him (he tunes out some of Ron and Hermione's conversations regardless of his love for them. It can happen when you get used to being around someone) which Tom would hate. Although Harry would find Tom's monologing kinda annoying at a certain point, I think.

I think Tom would do good for Harry's self-esteem issues since Tom wouldn't accept Harry thinking of himself as average when he is equal to Tom. Harry would be pretty good for Tom's weird prideful self-hatred and could probably help push for an arc there. Both by showing Tom actual affection and by keeping his ridiculous ego in check.

I also think Harry would appreciate someone being protective over him and wanting him so much as someone who grew up feeling unwanted and like he never had anyone in his corner. And Tom, I believe, would be protective and possessive in a relationship (a little too much, but still).

Basically, both of them (but mostly Tom) need work before they can make a relationship between them work, and that's before looking at their history in the books which will always require some canon-divergence or AU to make this pairing work. Very possible, but it takes effort. Most of said effort goes into forcing them to talk properly, honestly, because Tom really wants Harry, his one failure, dead. Like, Harry would shockingly be the easier one to convince of this, I think. Like, he was willing to forgive Tom, he already sees him as a person and not a bogeyman. Plus, he thinks Tom is hot (the younger one at least). Tom (as Voldemort, during the series), as I said, sees Harry not as Harry but as a representation of his own failings, and until he gets that out of his head, I can't really see this relationship working.

When it comes to the "Harry time travels to the 1940s and goes to Hogwarts with Tom" fics it's easier to get them together because Tom has fewer complexes, but it's still not easy (Sure, he doesn't have 10 million complexes, just 7 million instead). So even then Harry has his work cut out for him and this relationship would be a trainwreck that might take collateral damage in the form of everyone around them being miserable with their bullshit.

The key point in all scenarios I mentioned is that Harry needs to actively pursue Tom because otherwise, it won't happen. Because Tom isn't going to pursue it on his own unless some AU reason pushes him to do so. I can see him getting obsessed with Harry easily in various circumstances, but while he'd pursue his obsession, I don't think it would cross his mind to date Harry. Not on his own, I just don't see Tom coming up with it without something to help him get there. Maybe (again in a time travel scenario) a younger Tom could pursue a fake relationship in pursuit of his obsession, but Harry would fight against it because he'd see through him. I also find it hard to imagine Harry pursuing this relationship with Tom through all of Tom's bullshit. I don't think Harry has the patience for that (unless he has a specific reason to do so).

I don't think Harry would pursue this relationship to begin with either. As I mentioned, emotional intelligence and romance in particular are not Harry's strong suits. He could be in love and not notice it because he shrugged it up to something else and he has more pressing things to worry about. If he does notice, he might try to pursue it, but it again depends on the AU or specific situation. I think he could flirt if he set his mind to it, but whether that's effective with Tom depends on which point in Tom's life we're talking about...

I wrote here about the trope of Tom finding out Harry is his Horcrux and, honestly, what I wrote there applies to any potential romantic relationship between them too. Especially if this trope is relevant in the getting-together stage.

All of this is without talking about the elephant in the room of their specific age difference that I'm kinda ignoring. In the books it's a difference of 54 years, which is a lot, but hey wizards and in fic scenarios, Harry can be an adult or they can be the same age, or, well, in fic you can do whatever even when said whatever situation would be messed up irl. I mean, irl I would never advocate for anyone to sleep with their parents' murderer, but this is fanfiction we're talking about so it doesn't really matter. It does mean that this isn't the kind of pairing that I think could be canon or even canon-adjacent. And though I like it better than Drarry in many ways, it's way less likely to happen than Drarry in the canon books as they are.

So, yeah, I like Tomarrry/Harrymort. It's fun, it's juicy, it's dramatic, it has great fics for it out there, but can it realistically happen without some AU? Not really.

(Also, you mentioned Tom and Hermione so I'll add in a little aside that I think that pair will get along worse than Tom and Harry. I think they would misunderstand each other a lot. And Tom, contrary to popular belief isn't going to appreciate someone who's trying to prove he isn't the smartest person in the room. I also think Tom wouldn't like Hermione's attitude over basically anything. I think Hermione would disapprove of Tom's general disregard for others' lives and well-being as well, and she would take more offense at it than Harry. I think Hermione is more likely to get intimidated by Tom than Harry too. Like Hermione would startle at something Tom says whereas Harry would call out his bluff)

[madelee]

How I like to imagine the ZaDr dynamic. How they sift from enemies to something more. And what I fucking love about ZaDr.

Some thoughts.

Zim and Dib, two emotionally neglected kids. Having little to no friends or any emotional support system… They became the primary attachment figures for each other: Based on them being enemies this relationship/development… it’s bound to be very complicated and messy.

There are various emotions mixed up in their dynamic. The initial hatred, frustration, and antagonism because they literally are enemies… but also the feelings of bonding, caring, appreciation, respect, and understanding. Then when getting older, also attraction, passion, and all those fuzzy feelings get mixed in.

But essentially, all the positive emotions that one develops and gets to experience with a close person like love, adoration, connection, tenderness, compassion, or simply joy… all those also get mixed up with the ‘negative’ ones.

The brain quite literally connects feelings of affection and connection with violence, aggression, cruelty, abuse, and brutality. This is trauma bonding, reward-based learning, and positive conditioning.

Them being obsessive and excessive as a fundamental part of their core personality only adds as a multiplier.

When this happens in a critical life phase (being young and in adolescence), having nearly no other positive influences in life and being neglected (emotionally especially), this connection the brain made will get so deeply internalized and won’t ever truly go away.

It could also connect to your sexuality and all that.

(There are real-life equivalencies)

What I’m getting at is, all this makes just so much sense!

This dynamic and their relationship is super complex and nuanced because of this.

Their relationship is incredibly intense and yes totally toxic but also compassionate.

Them fluctuating between high psychological distress/tension (hating, fighting, obsessing, loving, being in denial about your existence, generally trauma responses e.g., through neglect, loneliness, abandonment) and then them experiencing the sweet release through the aspects of their dynamic (connection, closeness, intimacy) as mentioned.

This stuff becomes quite simply addictive to someone.

This is why they can get crazy shit feral/hardcore with each other and also feel pleasure while doing so.

Like cutting each other up (or open), taunting, fighting, beating each other...

But because I’m a sucker for ambivalence and stark contrast, I like to imagine them being very, very cute with each other as well (occasionally even without showing the bad stuff while being cute), still toxic, still abusing and batshit crazy but absolutely meaning everything to each other and deeply caring.

Fluffy but in an obsessive and excessive way.

They will always somewhat be mean to each other and never shy to argue, even if just in a teasing and more lighthearted manner.

This is their love language after all.

This is how they show they care, and it’s what they know.

Also, this is just how they are personality-wise: thick-headed, intense people with strong opinions and even stronger egos.

And let’s not forget about stupidness, dorkyness, and comedy sprinkled in.

ZaDr is a fantastic way to deep dive into complex inner psychological human workings and I love exploring this.

(I love love love intense emotions.)

It’s even comforting in a way, if you ask me.

Hate and love are so close for a reason.

It’s the most intense we can feel.

And I mean, I guess we all (or many of us) can somehow relate to not liking or even hating a close one (even if only sometimes). But when a real deep bond is established with someone and when affection is also part of your connection (even if only sometimes), this stuff just doesn’t go away. Toxic relationships are messy and certainly not easy nor black and white. You just understand this emotion… of how complicated you can feel about someone, and what complexity this can bring with it.

Note that, this is how I like to imagine it. One can have a totally different perspective on it and this is valid as well!

Also this is romanticized, fiction and reality operate differently. Cognitive dissonance baby.

[lawlightautismtruther]

SUPER LONG LAWLIGHT DYNAMIC ANALYSIS RANT (THIS MOSTLY ONLY APPLIES TO THE ANIME)

It’s really not that serious, but there’s more to my thesis of L being a sub/bottom than just blorbo yaoi fuel. I‘ll call back to my post about L’s true emotional vulnerability that most viewers seem to miss, because on a surface level (especially when coming from the manga and when trusting the words of Obha at face value) you may see L as detached and cold. You’re supposed to think that L is unfeeling at FIRST but post-confinement/pre-yotsuba, the truth starts to seep out. L could have had Light convicted after seeing that no more criminals were dying since locking him up, but he didn’t. Even Aizawa admitted that it was enough evidence. You know it’s real when Aizawa agrees with Matsuda, lmfao.

Anyway, after this point, L and Light actually really start to bond. (I pretty much see lawlight as subtextual canon) L, not really needing to do this because of his access to surveillance, handcuffs himself to Light Yagami. He doesn’t want to be apart from him. I actually find it to be a comedically obvious act of desperation.

My point is, Light is winning the game, and L is letting him do it out of what I believe is love. L has found the one person in his life (besides maybe Naomi) that he really feels any sort of connection to, and therefore he would hate to watch that person die. L is inarguably a vulnerable character imo. If you rewatch the the series, outside of his internal monologues, he’s actually extremely soft-spoken and coy.

“Oh, uh, well it was nice meeting you”

“Light, please make Misa stop talking now.”

You get the point. He’s nervous. He’s super frail and holds himself very compactly, he walks with his eyes on the ground usually. He shakes when Aizawa lays a hand on him. He is terrified of shinigami. I think his coldness is an act to protect himself. I really do, because he knows how much things actually do affect him. In order to continue with cases, he has to pretend like none of it really matters to him. And he almost believes it at this point, too— hence his monster speech.

But then there’s Light Yagami. A worthy individual to truly understand L. He comes along, actually treats L like a human being (be it an act, I believe it still feels good to L, who has been treated like a robot his entire life), of course L is bound to at the very least see him as a friend.

I don’t believe L’s external behavior towards Light is an act. He didn’t have to be kind, he didn’t have to pretend it was a friendship. He had zero professional reason to do so. In fact, it very much made the case a harder one to solve. If we take L’s character at face value, he would have scrapped all of the fluffy shit (like asking Light to go get cake with him, telling Light he was his only friend knowing damn well Light wouldn’t budge regardless, etc.) Adding a friendship into the mix only complicates the process of trying to read Light.

As much as L the detective hates to lose, L the person is desperate. If he really hated to lose, why did he let himself? He’s submitting to Light’s will and THAT is what kills him. On the day he dies, he knows it will happen, but still, he treats Light with kindness. Sure, he asks him if he’s ever told the truth once in his life, but after that, he pretty much gives up prying. That’s it. He’s put his gun down. Since he’s going to die anyway, he might as well just enjoy being around Light. I know for a fact that he is smart enough to have come up with some sort of plan to convict Light post-Higuchi. There’s a book about that. But canonically, he didn’t do it. Notice also how L goes to Watari before he dies for comfort. L is really such a sad character.

The crux of his character is his submissiveness, hence why I’m such a proponent of that ship dynamic. Its not just a wet-dream, it’s something I sensed in their dynamic to begin with. It’s why I became an L simp, not the other way around.

Anyway, the anime is a genius adaptation and expansion on the original story imo. (At least up until L’s death— unfortunately it didn’t do the other Wammy’s boys any justice)

TLDR;

manga L- cold and domineering, hates to lose and mostly loses at first because Light outsmarts him

anime L- the very opposite and I LOVE IT

Look at me putting my 5 on the AP English literature exam to use! Also, I know I’m a huge L fan, but I am a Light kinnie and I love him as a protagonist in every possible anti-hero type way and would love to analyze him so let me know if yall want that.

Okay, class, any questions?

[sirfrogsworth]

There are some people making the smoking in movies thing way too complicated. They're talking about the Hays code and shit. This isn't some mass censorship campaign. And cigarettes in movies are not like some vital narrative device. They stopped putting smoking in movies for like a decade and some people reading this are probably like, "Wait, they did?"

And one person is like, "But James Cameron said..."

James Cameron is dedicating the end of his life to giant blue kitties. Can we not listen to James Cameron about this right now?

It's not that serious. It's a cost/benefit analysis.

Is the small subtextual characterization added from cigarettes worth influencing 10-14 year olds to become addicted to something that will slowly and painfully murder them?

Almost every smoker is a teenage murder victim who just dies really slowly.

Also, do you really want to make tobacco companies happy? Every time someone lights up on screen, people who have done some of the most truly evil shit... get an extra yacht.

I know people have that feeling where any kind of censorship feels like a slippery slope. But there is no slope here. We've already done it and it was fine. Sex and violence and everything else are staying put.

Let me put it like this. What if playing with a yo-yo looked super cool? And for a while directors had every badass in their movie walking the dog and rocking the baby.

But then there were no more yo-yos in movies.

Would you be really upset the yo-yos were gone?

An affectation is not some integral plot device.

Basically we have all of these directors thinking, "I'm a real artistic bad boy." and tobacco companies are like, "Free propaganda. NICE."

[taylortruther]

Did it feel like her songs about Joe were starting to get redundant? By the time Midnights came out I was surprised we were hearing another two songs about the breakup/make up period in the beginning, another song about the beginning when they were falling in love, another three songs about how the relationship is great if the world stays out of it, another song about the Afterglow I-thought-he-cheated moment, and another song about how it wasn't supposed to work but it did. It really struck me that the Joe parts of Midnights were dedicated to not giving us any kind of update or really new information. It was all either about their beginnings again or 'everything's perfect except for the media nothing to see here.' She found a couple new angles on it, like Mastermind, but she was mining the same ground she'd been sifting through for four albums already. At the time it struck me as odd that she was deliberately avoiding any real update, but I thought she was just committed to privacy and refused to go into any other part of their relationship that wasn't already known (which is entirely her right). But obviously it turned out to be much more complicated than that and the mysterious gap makes perfect sense now.

i noticed the beginning was really fertile ground for her, but it didn't really strike me as unusual or concerning. the 2016-2019 period of her life was HARD. it was obvious, to me, she was probably processing that stuff all the time because for her, it never went away.

additionally, folkmore's fictional narratives and midnights' reflections on the past still reflect her mental landscape at the time of writing (tolerate it, coney island, bejeweled, champagne problems, hoax say hello.) so i'd argue she was treading new ground and writing about some of their issues even if it wasn't strictly autobiographical.

plus, as super fans, i think we get caught in the minutiae and don't see the big picture. let's pull back and look at the story her albums told about their relationship, in stages:

2016: joe and taylor meet and fall in love 2017: reputation is released and, among other things, it's about joe being sexy and wonderful and not caring that she was "crazy" or cancelled 2019: masters situation happens also 2019: lover is released and it's about taylor recovering from the cancellation, fighting her demons, admitting she self-sabotages, but we also get songs implying they want to get married! makes sense, it's 2-3 years of dating now. we also, notably, get a song about her wanting to step back out into the world! 2020: pandemic! sorry, daylight! also 2020: folklore and evermore are released and are about, among other things!, how she fears her life is too big for joe to handle but she is still planning a future with him (peace, the lakes, which both feel more present to me.) makes sense, they have obviously talked marriage and KIDS, things are getting very real. but, to your point, evermore in particular reasserts that they were lucky to find each other in the beginning (clm, lss, evermore.) 2021: renegade discusses joe's shit - we now understand that he has his own struggles and clearly describes a very recent/present conflict ("timing") 2022: in midnights, we get songs about the early honeymoon phase (lavender haze), and about how he is still a respite from it all (sweet nothing, mentions a recent trip to wicklow.) 2023: ylm drops (written in dec 2021), we also get the alcott - both implying conflict and a couple trying or failing to reconnect. makes sense, it's been like 6-7 years! couples go through shit!

...no, this isn't the WHOLE story. but it feels like a satisfying one, and not one where she was simply recycling topics. to me anyway.

[aihoshiino]

chapter 142 thoughts!

HEADS UP: In this review I discuss fictional depictions of sibling incest as well as a brief reference to both fictional and a real life suicide. As usual, feel free to skip if you're not in the right zone and I'll see you next time.

thank you for the kind words from everyone when i was still in the Slime Era of feeling sick lol. i'm like 80% back to full power now!

I'm gonna be totally up front and say I really think this is one of the worst chapters we've gotten in a while but here's the twist: it's not for the reasons you probably think!

We're following up basically right off the back of last chapter and immediately I am kind of mad at how shitty the series is continuing to do Miyako with regards to the movie arc. She was a total non-factor in the RBKN conflict and now that Aqua and Ruby are being pressured into doing something they have both verbalized that they don't want to do she's just like well gosh i feel complicated but what can i do :(. Having the setup almost 20 full chapters ago of Miyako expressing that she wants to step up and do more for Aqua and Ruby as their mother and then having her completely failing to intervene on their behalf here is just wild.

In general, the way everything is being set up to force this kiss feels so… well, forced. Even if Kaburagi (as the story says) insisted there be a kiss scene, there are a million ways to fake a kiss that doesn't involve actors actually kissing. Body doubles! Camera angles! Putting your thumbs in the way! Unless Kaburagi said "I want 20 full seconds of Kamiki sticking his tongue down Ai's throat center frame", there is absolutely no reason "a kiss scene" needs to mean "these two blood related twin sibling actors actually kiss". The whole thing is just so incredibly contrived.

And honestly? The fact that both Ruby and Aqua have expressed a 'no' and are being forced to do this anyway is the part of this chapter making me the most actively insane. It is absolutely mind boggling to have spent half of last chapter on a Miyako monologue about how immoral and unethical it is when people's ability to give informed and sincere consent is compromised by the entertainment industry and to then follow it with a whole chapter of basically every character we're supposed to like flaunting a total lack of respect for Aqua's comfort and consent in this regard, up to and including the completely insane scene of two adult women lecturing Aqua about how he isn't allowed to have boundaries. What the fuck is going on here!!!

This is especially frustrating because I actually really like a lot of things about the scene with Yoriko and Abiko… even if there's some stuff that really kind of broke me lol. Like uh, wasn't it a really huge plot point in Tokyo Blade that a mangaka couldn't be expected to turn out an entertaining theater script because those are two entirely different kinds of storytelling…??? But whatever.

Off the bat, I have really mixed-leaning-negative feelings about the reveal that the KamiAi romance scenes we'd gotten were entirely fictional. On the one hand, I actually feel pretty validated - I had guessed that the full-immersion-flashback presentation was a hint that we were being presented with a falsehood and it implicitly confirms something I've been saying from the start that 15 Year Lie's version of events has to be taken with a grain of salt, both because it contradicts known events and facts and because so many other people have interfered with it. Having that made textual and being able to confidently say it helps a lot in discussing what this means for the story.

But like… that means we wasted a whole bunch of time on shit that was made up and didn't matter! Like, thematically speaking, I think this is potentially interesting but I just keep getting stuck on the fact that we were given a super interesting scene finally fleshing out and giving us info about both a character and a relationship we've been absolutely starved for details about, only for the story to turn around not two chapters later and go "and my source? i made it the fuck up". It just totally dashes all the enthusiasm I was feeling and it also makes it way less rewarding to try and dig into what 15YL is doing when at any time, all of this potentially interesting character work could be revealed to be total piss in the wind.

Stepping back from that… in total isolation from everything else, I do think this talk with Abiko and Yoriko about what it means to write stories is interesting from a lot of angles. While I don't think these two are the 1-to-1 author avatars for Aka and Mengo fandom treats them as, they nevertheless clearly serve as reflections of the two's experiences and viewpoints about the manga industry and specific and the art of storytelling in general, allowing the story to play around in the quasi-metafictional space it does sometimes, where it uses in-universe fiction as a method of commenting on itself.

In that sense, I think Yoriko can be understood as speaking for Akasaka here and discussing some of his feelings as a storyteller of Oshi no Ko specifically. OnK has never made a secret of the fact that it's drawing on Akasaka's real experiences in the entertainment industry but perhaps less obvious to overseas fans is the inspiration it takes from real life issues in contemporary Japanese pop culture, too. Infamously, Akane's arc very transparent drew inspiration - if it wasn't reconstructed entirely - from the suicide of Hana Kimura, not even six full months after Kimura's death. When the anime aired, Kimura's surviving mother (imo, rightfully and deservedly) lambasted the series for using her daughter's death as the fodder for entertainment without consulting her surviving family. It wasn't even that she disagreed with what the series was saying - she just wanted someone to have some consideration.

This is what Yoriko means when she talks about the responsibility a writer has to their stories. When you write a piece of fiction as highly visible as Oshi no Ko currently is, it is your responsibility to consider the impact your words will have on the world. No, fiction does not directly impact the real world in a physical, tangible way but if we are careless with our stories, we can regurgitate and perpetuate dominant cultural narratives that very much do cause real, tangible harm to marginalized people. Hikaru Kamiki isn't a real person, but there are undoubtedly people in OnK's readerbase who see their experiences mirrored in him. Airi Himekawa isn't real, but people like her exist. Akane Kurokawa isn't real but Hana Kimura was.

This discussion also serves as an interesting warning to Aqua himself, though maybe not quite in the sense Yoriko intended. Aqua's revenge has always been something treated, in-universe, as a sort of fiction in of itself; Aqua calls it his 'revenge play' and his primary method of pursuing it is to become an actor. It's a retribution narrative about real people and Aqua is its author. But as Yoriko reminds him… stories can kill. Especially ones featuring real people. Aqua has been telling himself a comfortable lie for years that only he will be hurt by his own inevitable self destruction but Yoriko reminds him that he isn't the only person involved here and that he is inevitably going to cause great pain to the people he loves if her continues down this path.

That's why this chapter is so frustrating. This is all good, meaty character work with some great thematic overtones… and it's all in service of contriving this scenario where Aqua has no choice but to tongue his sister on camera and for some reason, nobody is pointing out the million and one alternatives to this deranged scenario.

But anyway. Enough beating around the bush: let's talk about That Scene. And despite what everything I've said this post might lead you to believe… I actually really like it.

I don't know exactly what activated to make her go sicko mode but Mengo has been really on fucking fire with her art on the series lately. It really jumped out to me in 137 but she's honestly been cooking since the very start of the movie arc. It stands out especially strongly in Aqua and Ruby's talk on the balcony in ways I really vibed with. The whole scene feels like Ruby's shoujo brainrot and the cold reality of what she's tiptoeing around suggesting to Aqua are battling out for dominance over the framing. Ruby's stubbornness is such a force to be reckoned with that it almost wins entirely but there are moments where the lens cracks and we see things as they are. Aqua's discomfort practically radiates off the page this entire conversation.

Not only that but… jesus christ, Ruby. Just look at how she's framed when she first enters the scene.

That oppressive silhouette, her shaded eyes and that sinister smile… I probably don't need to tell you that's NOT how you typically frame a romantic heroine. She honestly almost looks more like a villain.

But Ruby quickly reasserts control over the framing. Or rather, what she's suggesting is such a sugary shoujo fantasy, the framing has no other option but to comply. At last, Ruby steps out of the shallow channel of plausible deniability and puts into concrete words what she has been thinking and longing for these last twenty chapters: for her to retake her role as Sarina Tendoji and for Aqua, in turn, to play Gorou for her once again. More than that - she pushes him for a concrete response to her love at last, not as Ruby but as Sarina; not only does the paneling repeatedly cover the eye with her star but in the final panel where she unambiguously propositions Aqua, the star is completely gone. This is what Ruby is offering: to completely sever her connection to Ai and the new life she has built on that foundation and to return to being Sarina, if that is what the doctor she loves wants.

This is SUCH an incredibly effective scene. It's excellently done and the art is fantastic. It finally draws out and makes explicit the underlying disconcerting subtext that has been swimming under the twins' relationship since 123. It works fantastically well… in isolation. But when taken into the context of the rest of the story it just feels so… unearned.

For the last 20 chapters, we have had absolutely no serious insight into Ruby's feelings re: the reveal of Gorou's new identity as Aqua. We didn't see her grapple with it or have to adjust to it at all. It was like a switch flipped in her brain and she was suddenly a 2010s fanservice imouto splooging about her oniichan. Her interiority in this regard is completely absent. Whenever the subject is addressed at all, it is made into a joke with Ruby as the punchline. There has been no serious build up to this moment or any meaningful time spent on Ruby's feelings about Aqua and as such, being asked to take it seriously now feels so incredibly jarring.

I've said this over and over in other places but I'll make this clear here: the handling of Ruby's feelings is not bad because Incest Is Morally Bad or whatever. At the end of the day, OnK is fiction and fiction is a space that allows us to explore ideas and scenarios that would be unpleasant, dangerous or even downright immoral to try and interrogate in real life with real people. Not only that, but AQRB's situation is so far removed from anything any real person could experience there's very little risk of it acting as a harmful reflection of a real person's life. But because OnK had the space to do just about anything with this idea, I'm so incredibly baffled that it chose to do all of nothing. This is a plot point that has been cooking since the literal first chapter of the entire series and now, just under four years and over 140 chapters past our starting point… and this is the best Akasaka can do? Dated brocon humor that reduces Ruby to a shallow gag character, denying her the opportunity to have deeper, more complex and ugly feelings and denying her the respect of examining those feelings with honesty?

It sucks. This whole thing really sucks. As someone who loves Ruby so, so much… this really just feels like an insulting way to have handled what should have been one of the most interesting and engaging parts of her series long arc.

I do think this chapter is the beginning of the end of AquRuby's time in the endgame couple race, if it was ever seriously in the running to begin with. Ruby embracing Aqua with a proposition in those final two panels echoes Akane doing the same in chapter 72 and the fact that this cliffhanger ends on the proposition and not a kiss implies to me, structurally speaking, that we are heading for a rejection. On top of that, we're pretty far away from the manga's ending still and Kana's romantic resolution with Aqua hasn't gotten its time to shine. All those factors together makes me feel pretty certain that this is the final nail in the coffin and we're just waiting to see how Aka sticks the landing.

After all - Ruby is asking for his response as Sarina. And if this is Sarina asking for his love one last time… we already know how Gorou's going to respond.

[duckapus]

WarioWare(and Waluigi because It's My House) Headcanons

Because I can't stop making it That Deep.

Yoshi's Island DS is canon, specifically the bit of the ending where Baby Wario never actually gets delivered to his parents because he was more interested in stealing Baby Bowser's treasure. Due to that, he grew up in an orphanage after somebody found him on his raft full of gold.

Never actually got adopted because people can be shits and didn't want the weird-looking greedy superpowered fat kid who ate garlic like it was candy, but he's not particularly fussed about it. As far as he's concerned he had a great childhood.

That said it did result in him knowing a lot of other orphans who were significantly and understandably less content with their situations, which is why he's seemingly so drawn to kids with complicated home lives.

He's known Jimmy, 5-Volt and Waluigi (Walter at the time, he picked up "Waluigi" later in life) since they were kids. He met Jimmy their very first day of Kindergarten and never looked back, met Walter in third grade by protecting him from some bullies, and that same summer hired 5-Volt to help him and the guys with their lemonade stand, because He Has Always Been Like This.

Walter had an older sister named Gloria who was just as into science as their dad, and who often ended up supervising/getting dragged into him and his friends' antics

No idea who their mom might've been. Honestly given what Crygor's like he could have made them in his lab a 'la the Membrane family and I wouldn't be surprised.

Waluigi's actually just as ridiculously super-smart as the rest of his family, he just isn't interested in science at all. This, along with several other issues, drove a wedge between him and Crygor early on that slowly got worse as he grew up. He actually moved out and cut off most forms of communication as soon as he graduated high school because they could barely handle being in the same room without arguing by that point.

They didn't talk to each-other at all for a few years after that, until the horrible day they both got calls informing them Gloria and her husband had been in a car accident.

Baby Penny ended up staying with Crygor partly due to Walter's living situation not being entirely stable at the time, and they decided to at least try to relearn how to be around each-other so they could both be part of Penny's life (and because the whole thing had been a wake-up call for Crygor to how badly he'd messed up with Walter and he wanted at least some form of relationship with the kid he still had left)

Also, the Waluigi name and slightly exaggerated personality were mostly a Bit he did for shits and giggles at the first Mushroom Kingdom Tennis Tournament, but he ended up liking the nickname and the audience ate up the act, so he kept going with it afterwards. Crygor and Jimmy's parents are the only ones who still call him Walter in casual conversations anymore, which he doesn't mind since he still likes his real name even if he usually prefers Waluigi.

5-Volt's been dealing with her inexplicable demonic powers her whole life. Her parents have always been really worried about it and convinced it's some kind of horrible curse, meanwhile there's little 5-Volt happy as a clam because she's always got a Player Two.

The shadow thing is...sort-of her spirit but also sort-of its own entity? It's weird and she has trouble explaining it because this is just how it's always been for her.

Also, she does have some anger issues and violent tendencies that are made worse by the whole demonic transformation thing, but being friends with Wario for most of your life gives you a lot of practice at self-restraint

As she got older, she became more aware of how her parents felt about her abilities, their attempts to "cure" her of them, and how they seemed to grow more and more convinced that they were a danger to her and those around her.

This came to a head when they found out she was pregnant with 9-Volt and didn't react well, at which point she decided she was sick of them treating her like both an invalid and a monster and cut them out of her life.

Wario, the Crygors and the Thangs were actually there with her and her husband(who I need to come up with at some point) when 9-Volt was born, which I feel has to have been one of the wildest ways for Wario to meet one of his future employees.

No notes on Jimmy's childhood. We have met his parents and they're freaking awesome.

Since he obviously doesn't remember the events of Yoshi's Island DS since he was a literal baby at the time, the first time Wario met Mario actually was Super Mario Land 2, though he's obviously heard of the guy beforehand. After that and a few other encounters he ended up invited to a Kart racing tournament and that was that.

The first time he met Ashley and Red was during an adventure in his "living in a castle in the woods" era. They were going after the same cursed artifact (Ashley to keep it out of the wrong hands and Wario because in his words "Cursed treasure's the best kind! nothing like a little danger to get the blood pumping"). They probably would've ended that adventure as rivals or even enemies, but the artifact turned out to be a "sentient and wants to kill you with lasers" kind of cursed and Wario took a nasty hit for her and smashed the thing.

At some point he decided that living alone in a huge castle full of treasure with only a pet chicken for company sucked, actually, and packed up to move back to his old hometown, Diamond City.

That's actually how he met Dribble and Spitz. He'd taken a Warp Pipe to the city instead of his car or bike when he was looking at houses for sale because he'd forgotten how big the place was, so after spending half the day pounding pavement with no luck he hailed a cab and got theirs. He wasn't having any more luck than before thanks to his high standards(because his previous house was a freaking castle, sue him) and comically small budget (Wario is Wario, after all), but the company was good and there was far less walking so he was far less miserable than before.

He did end up picking a house that day...because the cab broke down in front of a miserable little abandoned shack on a hill at the edge of town and he basically went "Fuck it! I guess I live here now!"

Mona knew about Wario and was his biggest fan before she met him, seeing as even back than he was sort of a celebrity, but they didn't actually meet until a few weeks after he moved into town, when he and Orbulon, both disheveled and covered in soot and scorch marks from a first encounter they have never and will never elaborate on, walked into the Gelateria and placed the two worst ice-cream orders known to man, which I will not actually come up with for the sake of our stomachs. She was the only one in the room not horrified or even phased by these proceedings, and the three have been friends ever since.

He met Kat and Ana through 9-Volt, who became friends with them during recess their first day of school.

Most of the crew that he met after Mega Microgame$ were just introduced to him through his other friends(or we've outright seen it happen like with Lulu), but Young Cricket and Master Mantis he actually met while helping Mario with one of his own off-screen adventures.

Wario's actually pretty rich thanks to his treasure hunting, his fame, and the fact that he literally owns a Gold Mine and a Ski Resort! All the references to him allegedly being broke all the time are mostly just part of the skits for the games, like the ones for everyone else's levels. That said, his house really is as messed up as it looks, but that's just because he's stingy and a slob.

18-Volt really is the same age as 9-Volt. His unusual size is partially because he's originally from New Donk City.

Wario does, in fact, still have his pet chicken. I have not thought of a name for her

(Edit: I have been informed by @plushietoon that the chicken is canonically named Hen. Which is adorable and hilariously on-brand for Wario)

[badass-queer-couples-battle]

Propaganda:

For Shadowpeach: "ok so, we all know from that one tumblr post that yaoi is two blokes doing fuckall and yuri is when there’s themes and shit? well these two (shadowpeach) have So Much Themes. they were super close friends for years and years (both immortal) before their epic breakup scene (wukong was trapped under a mountain and macaque refused to free him) (he wasn’t entirely in the wrong but that’s another story) (also wukong killed macaque there was that, that did happen) (its complicated)

from the Moment we see these two, all we know about them is that they’re the most divorced ever. as time goes on, we see the complexities in their relationship, and they introduce a lot of the overarching themes and motifs of the show (hero and warrior pairs, peaches being a symbol of their relationship, etc). also they’re both girls to me

tmnt theme song voice toxic codependent yuri!"

"theyre So So gay divorced and have an incredibly complicated and toxic relationship. also according to that one tumblr post yaoi is when theres two blokes doing fuckall and yuri is when theres themes and shit, and these two have So So So many themes and shit. theyve got motifs out the wazoo. peaches are a motif of their relationship and in the very end of the s4 finale wukong hands macaque a half-melted peach flavored (and shaped) popsicle. this is yuri to me"

"They used to be semi-immortal bff's, but then they fell apart and literally one of them died(bc of the other), then he revived, then got semi-consumed by revenge™ and tried to kill each other for a while, but they are cool now and they gave the sweetest little smiles when they finally talked- *fangirls* ok ok, look at it this way: it's a royalty au but it's canon."

"Well, they are toxic doomed yuri vibes, in my.most opinion. But also their designs are pretty gender I think.. mostly wukongs imo. And ik eyelashes aren't inherently feminine but theyre both some of the few(if not only) male characters in the show with visible eyelashes. Also if it counts, out of the relationships that I've seen compared to theirs, most are canonical sapphic relationships from other cartoons (catradora and bubbline notably)"

For Arthur and Linus: "THEY ARE SOO YURI!! OLD MAN YURI!!! LIKE!!! JUST LOOK AT THEM!!! THEYRE SO ADORABLE"

"A warm, loving caretaker of magical children who are orphans falls in love with the fat neurotic caseworker and changes his life for the better."

For Thoschei: "i. why great

They are each other's narrative foils. They are archenemies. They were childhood friends. They might not have been married, but they are divorced. They call themselves best enemies. They are the "i can fix them"/"i can make them worse" duo. They've proposed to each other (to rule/travel across the universe together), but each declined the offer from the other. They've kissed. They've killed each other. They've killed for each other (the first to do so was the Doctor who is the protagonist and the hero, but this fact was revealed in an audio drama, not in the TV show). The universe's too small for both of them. "The cosmos without the Doctor scarcely bears thinking about" is a real quote from one of the episodes from the 1980s. They are war criminals. The Master commits atrocities to attract the Doctor's attention and admits it. They are not able to get rid of each other for good, nor they really want to. One of the showrunners literally spent the BBC's money to make his E2L I Can't Decide fanvid for them and make it a part of an episode.

ii. why guy:

They'd been in male bodies for more than 40 years…

iii. why yuri

…until one of them regenerated into a woman. After some time, the other did so too. Sadly, they haven't interacted in their female bodies on screen, but the fandom makes do with fan content.

in conclusion: this is The guy yuri if i've ever seen one"

[laundrybiscuits]

Just curious and i like hearing your thoughts on this stuff. May i ask what aspect of steddie fanon you're referring to (which don't fit IRL queer culture so accurately)?

Ahaha...okay so. IMPORTANT NOTE: fandom is not that crucial, do whatever you want, run free through daisy fields of whatever headcanons and characterizations you please. Also, fic is not real life and that's okay!!

That being said, fandom can get slightly weird about sex, especially queer sexual cultures and especially historical queer sexual cultures. I mean, I get it! Our current hegemonic understanding of sexuality is actually pretty recent; I studied sexuality from a sociological perspective as part of my undergrad degree, focusing on moral panics (gosh I wonder why Eddie's character arc appeals to me! so mysterious!), and I know just enough to know that I don't know shit. So I certainly don't expect anyone to be doing paradigm-shifting sociohistorical research for a fic. That would be ridiculous.

All of this is leading up to say that based on 1) the relayed experiences of queer mentors who were in the scene in the 80s 2) the secondary sources I’ve researched 3) personally having many gay male friends who love oversharing through the last ~15 years, I believe that if canon-compliant gay Eddie Munson is a virgin, it’s largely by choice. 

I've seen it suggested that Eddie's poor academic performance and nerdy interests would be, essentially, a dick deterrent. And like...I enjoy Eddie’s weirdo loser vibe as much as the next fan. I fully support him not being in any way smooth or cool with boys. But even when I myself was in my late teens/early twenties, many of my closest friends were awkward nerdy twinks who absolutely managed to get laid every weekend because MSM* hookup culture is eternal. 

And in the early 80s, when Eddie would’ve been in his late teens, MSM hookup culture was at its peak. AIDS still wasn’t being taken that seriously, and transmission etc. wasn’t really understood because…well, you know this story. It’s not a good story. Fuck Reagan. 

In short, I really can’t emphasize enough how certain types of sexual contact were extremely available for men seeking sex with men. A pretty young thing like Eddie could have literally as much sex as he wanted. Nobody is asking him for a high school transcript or anything about his hobbies, they’re asking if he tops. 

Now, would Eddie actually participate in the hookup culture of the time? That's a more complicated and speculative question, and not actually what you asked, but I'm going to talk about it briefly anyway.

In the 'yes' column: he has his own vehicle**, zero supervision, and a penchant for risky behavior.

In the 'no' column: the boy has at least three extremely involved hobbies eating up his spare time and energy; he's also a not-so-secret romantic.

Personally, I can see the pseudo-intimacy appealing to Eddie's tendency to keep people at arm's length, and I think it’s very plausible for him to be curious and experimental enough to want to explore a bit. I tend to land on 'tried it a few times, doesn't make a habit of it' in my backstories. I also tend to hint at the softer, friendlier side of hookup culture in my fics, just because I don’t often see it represented. 

Of course it’s like any other scene, there are bad actors and generally shitty people/situations, and sometimes the MSM scene specifically can be a bit of a soul-draining meat market. (ETA, because I am not white and neither are the vast majority of my friends and I felt increasingly weird not mentioning it even though it's not relevant to Eddie's situation: the scene is often also super racist, among other things! But that's a whooole other complicated kettle of fish, and again, not relevant to Eddie's situation.)

But there’s also space for casual sex to be part of a friendly relationship, in a way that I don’t really see in hetero circles. It’s hard to explain. It’s one of those dynamics that basically never shows up in mainstream media at all, so I absolutely don’t blame fics that don’t show it either. It’s just one of those things.

This is a step to the left, but I recommend checking out Dykes To Watch Out For: it’s practically an anthropological document depicting dyke culture in the 80s, it’s often funny as hell, and it’s just a fantastically detailed and relatively accessible window into a particular way of life that doesn’t really exist anymore. 

*MSM = men who have sex with men. It’s a sociological designation; not everyone in this category identifies as gay, bi, queer, etc. It may be useful to think about sexuality as having three distinct components: behavior, identity, and desire. The term “MSM” puts focus on the behavioral aspect, because it’s most relevant in this context. 

**As someone who has experienced several other countries' driving cultures, I just want to emphasize to non-Americans how willing many Americans are to drive for multiple hours for basically any reason whatsoever.

[horizoncollective]

Hi, so... uh... I..uh... we are talking to you because Horus isn't responding and last time we contacted SSC they were talking about "your own, personalized nightmares" or whatever and not being helpful at all.

So, the last time I used the Hall of mirrors on my Dusk Wing, one of the clones... became real? Like, we are both me, we are both writing this together. We know who is the copy, but that's not a big deal. So like, what are we supposed to do? We have two identical people, do we just wait until they are no longer identical or what?

Whoa, this is a new one for me. I don't know how to fix this, but I can provide a humanitarian perspective.

My advice would be to get your clone their own identity paperwork so they will have access to the same sets of legal rights as you do. They should probably get a new name so they can't be mistaken for you. They are a copy of you, but there is no reason to think that they are not a complete person. They will have your memories, so they probably feel more fucked up about this than the you who used Hall of Mirrors.

For all we know they could vanish any time, so treasure them while they are here. Do not be afraid to have complicated conversations with your mutual loved ones. The clone should be able to talk to your parents, your romantic partner(s), your children, your pets. The love in their heart for those people is no less real than yours.

If they stick around in our reality, they will diverge from you and become a different person, more like a sibling than a clone. This is also fine. Your parents have been blessed with an additional child. Your child has an additional parent who will love them for as long as possible. If you died, wouldn't you be grateful knowing that there were as many people as possible who loved your kid as much as you do, who would still do everything for them?

Granted, this will be a little more complicated to figure out with your romantic partners, but you're all adults and I believe in you.

This is gonna feel super weird for everyone, but that's just a Lancer's life sometimes. We're trained to fight and a lot of the time we see shit no one has ever seen before, but you got a pretty cool one because you've been given a chance to love in new ways.

[hoardlikegoldenirises]

Noodling with something that happens later in the AU (...probably, I'm not actually sure if Kaine sees this outfit in a calm moment or not... valentine's day 2016 in windowverse is the day that everything goes to shit but there's a lot in my notes that is not fully figured out yet especially because not only do I not want to just use the scene from the comics, I actually can't, because of differences in timeline and so on and so forth. so I'm still working on that. )

Compare to an earlier scene (which I have actually written and not just made notes about lmao):

(og ren fest outfit post: here)

I'm running comparisons and queering the text or whatever the hell—

Recently after many months of not really knowing whether windowverse Kaine ought to be bi or gay or what I had a brainwave which is that, he's probably attracted to masculine presenting people in general, including men, butches and studs. it makes the most sense to me tbh, esp w/ his complicated relationship with his own body, masculinity, manhood, and sexuality in this universe (and 616, arguably). And also because in the comics, Louise was kinda butch or at least not super femme, and so is Terry, and Annabelle dresses however the hell she wants, including in men's clothes sometimes, so I was like. now. hang on. i'm sensing a pattern.

obv zoe and shannon are very feminine but the former is a stalker kaine seems to not actually want to be touched by and the latter was a mind controller so... you know.

really, in windowverse at least, a large facet of kaine's relationships and approach to sexuality is mostly built on this desperation to be loved and therefore taking whatever he can get... for the most part he's essentially doing this responsive, reciprocal thing in addition to trying to be a "real person" by trying to conform to heteronormative standards (but also rebelling against those standards at the same time, thus the skirt) — which is a lot of what his relationship with annabelle ends up being, and a cause of friction as well.

but the suit? actually hot to him.

Annabelle's earrings and purse in the v-day pic were xmas gifts from Kaine btw:

Kate Spade lol

as an aside wrt not being able to use the comics scene for AU kaine's life in houston crumbling apart: i can't make the Other work for that scene in windowverse specifically because in AU by Feb 2016 Kaine is in a position where if he is mortally wounded he will just die.

the Other happens (in October 2015) because Kaine is off his immune meds for a few weeks because he runs out and keeps putting off finding a new doctor etc. but anyway that means his fucked up (auto)immune system can do its thing and turn him into a monster after he's eaten alive by werewolves.

REALLY i actually don't know how long his immune system should take to start (over)working after he stops taking his azathioprine. Mostly i was like how long do t cells and other immune cells take to repopulate? and the answer is: i don't know. i couldn't find a good answer XD but I figure 2 weeks is probably fine............................? it's not like prednisone where he's technically withdrawing for like... 2 years.... (mmm steroids)

but anyway, in february he's had a new doctor for a few months and has access to all of his prescriptions again so like, spider monster ain't happening because he's immunocompromised on his meds— a state which simultaneously keeps his body from destroying itself but also makes him more vulnerable to dying from normal things. like infections. or bazookas.

i do think it would be fun drama if wally shot him though