#just for him to pop back into relevancy in chapter like. 32

[astro-nomaly]

MY BLICKYYYYYYYYYYY

NO FR FR

[cjoatprehn]

BaxTale: Chapter 3 Part 1

Surprise! I decided to write Chapter 3 anyway. It’s only because I really enjoy writing Baxxie’s tale...*snrk* omg that was bad. But nonetheless. Wouldn’t be Baxtale if there wasn’t a moment with Papyrus  NO BEFORE YOU START SHIPPING THEM TOGETHER NOT GONNA HAPPEN NO. (because to be honest there really is no plot here, just writing just for the sake of writing. But if you guys have ideas or art ideas, pls let me know.) So without further ado, here is chapter 3 part 1 of Baxtale. Hope you guys enjoy.

Bax grinned, happy to be in this world. Dancetale is so much fun! Why hasn’t she ever come here before? Literally it was so easy to thrill these dancing monsters with such a mystery. Pop in, dance, and pop out, repeat. It seems villainous to do this. Like...almost feeling the sins crawl down your back. Like little bug critters. It feels almost like...riding a rollercoaster.

Baxxie laughed with sheer glee as she hopped through evergreen after evergreen. A ninja dancer. She squealed like a two year old, not caring who would hear. No one knew the secrets she had, who was pulling the peace-disrupting dances, and who was having the most fun being both seen and unseen! Such a tease! And also not! 

She saw the town of Snowdin nearby, and the smell of Grillby’s cooking suddenly wafted into her nose. She landed on the Grillby’s Dance Bar. She heard music from inside. Okay. How should she go about this....She suddenly got an idea. When in doubt, enter with confidence, dance with flair, and leave with a bucket of tears. 

…

Grillby and the patrons are chilling down below, Grillby cooking burgers and food to those at the bar including Sans who is drinking mug after mug of Ketchup. It’s festival time. The whole town of Snowdin is merry with the switching of the seasons. But really, everyone is just really in a celebratory mood. Doggo hears something land on the roof. He tilts his head up toward it. “The ****?” He says, the rest of the dogs at his table to look at him. “Doggo?” One of them asks. “Heard something on the roof.” Doggo replies, sniffing the air for intruders. “What?” “Who foolin’ on the roof?” “Yo, Sans.”

“Yo.” Sans replies.

“Ya hear dat?” Doggo asks with a slight growl.

“Hear what?” Sans, turns his head to him, drunk.

“aaaand he’s drunk.” One of the dogs sighs with disappointment. “He didn’t hear anything, doggo maybe it’s nothing.”

“Didn’t seem like nothing.” Doggo sighs, before sitting back down.

Grillby sighs as he polishes another Beer mug when his flames suddenly move wildly, sensing a draft. “Grilbs?” Sans asked, looking at his flames moving erratically.

Nothing prepared them for the mysterious monster falling through the roof and landing on their feet on the floor.

“WHAT THE ****!!!” Doggo yelps, jumping on the table. In a black suit, with a silvery glove, and a white skeleton mask. Standing in a pose similar pose to a special dancer who’s music is becoming more relevant to today.

A beat drops as he lands, splinters of wood falling all around them. The air in the bar sparkling as ice crystals flew around the figure. Looking almost human-like. They flexed their gloved fingers, and pointed to the fire elemental behind the bar. Grillby raises an eyebrow. “Now that’s a challenge if I have ever seen one...”

“Grillby are you serious?” Sans asked, somewhat concerned, and suspicious of the masked skeleton monster.

“It’ll be fine, Sans, besides, no one destroys the roof of my bar and gets away without paying.” 

Everyone cleared the center of the bar, Grillby leaving the counter and facing the monster, he got a glimpse of the monsters eyes through his mask. He summoned his fire dancing flames. 

“DANCERS READY!” The challenging monster shook out their hands, and looked down, and Grillby readied his pose.

“3!”

“2!”

“1!”

“DANCE!”

Grillby danced to his usual theme song, his embers flicking and flowing about and spinning all around the room. His gaze glared at the skeleton masked monster before moving to attack him. Bold move, but that was the end of his turn as a song switches to an older classic of pop. As the flame headed toward the monster, hitting him dead on, filling the room with a mist.

...

The monster leaps from the mist, unharmed, and right in front of Grillby, gracing their finger across Grillby’s chin sending shivers down his spine, before suddenly popping off with an, “OW!” And Grillby stumbles back, as Baxxie reveals herself, her mask being a smokescreen. Dancers come out of the mist. Her song starts to play, as they all dance in sync. Baxxie sings in a extremely good disguised voice, 

“As he came into the window Was a sound of a crescendo

He came into her apartment He left the bloodstains on the carpet

She was sitting at the table He could see she was unable So she ran into the bedroom She was struck down It was her doom.”

“DANCE SKILL ACTIVATED. BAXXIE!”

Baxxie came over to one of the patrons, a female and took her hand, including her in the dance, for two. She continued to sing, as the dancers launched their own soundwave attacks, Grillby managing to block and dodge with his embers, and quick stepped dancing, in an attempt to combat her intense performance. 

“Annie, are you okay, you okay, you okay, Annie? Annie, are you okay, you okay, you okay, Annie? Annie, are you okay, you okay, you okay, Annie? Annie, are you okay, you okay, you okay, Annie?”

Baxxie dips the patron, obviously earning a squealed blush from her, never leaving eye contact with her. 

“Annie, are you ok Will you tell us that you're ok There's a sign at the window That he struck you A crescendo, Annie He came into your apartment He left the bloodstains on the carpet Then you ran into the bedroom You were struck down It was your doom!”

Baxxie spun and twirled the patron around just as she got into her quick footwork, wishing the dance could never end. Winning jealousy and admiration from the crowd in the bar. Grillby growls, sending his embers toward Baxxie, and she kicks it back toward the wall, combusting it into flames.

“Annie, are you okay, you okay, you okay, Annie? Annie, are you okay, you okay, you okay, Annie? Annie, are you okay, you okay, you okay, Annie?

You've been hit by You've been struck by A smooth criminal!” Baxxie spins her out back into the crowd, just as the her dance skill ends. and to finish up, she and the back up dancers grow closer to the fire elemental, intimidating him. “OW!” They step back and await.

Grillby summons dancers made of fire, and then combats her with his own quick footwork of his own, he must be riled up, because his embers and will-o-wisps fly around erratically, attacking each and every one of the Baxxie’s backup dancers.

“SONG CHANGE! GRILLBY!”

Grillby decides to spice things up a bit, HE STARTS SINGING, a song he’s never heard of, but he’s winging it and desperate. His flames changing toward darker reds and blacks.

“Double bubble disco queen headed to the guillotine Skin as cool as Steve McQueen, let me be your killer king It hurts until it stops, we will love until it's not I'm a killing spree in white, eyes like broken Christmas lights My touch is black and poisonous And nothing like my punch drunk kiss I know you need it, do you feel it Drink the water, drink the wine Oh we gotta turn up the crazy Livin' like a washed up celebrity Shooting fireworks like it's the Fourth of July Until we feel alright“

Now it’s Baxxie’s turn to feel intimidated, she summons ghosts this time,

“Annie, are you okay, you okay, you okay, Annie? Annie, are you okay, you okay, you okay, Annie? Annie, are you okay, you okay, you okay, Annie?--”

“we feel alright!!!!! AH!” 

“You've been hit by You've been struck by A smooth criminal”

Grillby and Baxxie’s souls are resonating like no monsters has before, clearly the songs they picked are shocking the underground with shockwaves! 

Eventually the dance-off becomes dancing-together! Grillby are still competing and yet working together to blow the roof off of this place.

(You can listen to this song now, it’s lit I ran out of dancemoves to write lol)

Soon a resounding boom fills the entire bar, the walls stretching to their limits, once the dance ends, leaving Grillby and Baxxie standing next to each other.

“DANCE END!”

“IT’S A TIE! SOUL RESONATION OVER THE TOP!”

Baxxie and Grillby face each other, just as Baxxie undoes the damage, leaving an address in his pocket, waving with a wink, as she flies back through the roof. The bar having returned to it’s normal splendor, without damage.

“That...was the best damn thing I ever seen.” Doggo grins.

“Huh. And she fixed my bar. Well. Everyone alright?” Grillby asked panting, his embers disappearing. 

“Holy crap, Grillby? What song was that?” Sans asked, somehow completely sober.

“I dunno. Just popped up in my menu.” Grillby brushes off more questions as he heads behind the baar and picks up the same glass he was polishing, and offers Sans  “another drink.”

“Nah... I’m good, Grillby.” He seemed jealous...which made the Grillster, smile coyly.

https://bax-the-hooman.tumblr.com/post/187269646705/baxtale-chapter-32

[mtvswatches]

Jane the Virgin 1x15 Chapter Fifteen

Spoilers disclaimer (please read before sending messages or writing comments.)

Click here for previous recaps!

Stray thoughts

1) I really like how the show has found a way to sneak political commentary without being too political…

JANE: What's the deal with the electoral college?

XIOMARA: Turns out this whole electoral college thing is crazy. We're not even actually voting for our president.

JANE: I know. We're voting for electors who are then pledged to a candidate.

XIOMARA: What?! Then why'd you ask?

JANE: Because you've voted in two elections. It was time you understood the process.

It’s also a small yet relevant moment between Jane and Xiomara because it portrays what type of mother Xiomara is. Jane asks her a lot of questions Xiomara doesn’t have the answers for, yet she doesn’t dismiss Jane’s queries or tells her it’s not important. Instead, she probably goes “I don’t know, but let’s find out.” It’s a very nurturing approach, in my opinion, because you’re telling your kid A) that’s it okay to admit that you’re ignorant, even if you’re a parent, B) it’s okay to ask questions, especially to ask “why.” And C) there are ways to find answers to your questions.

2) Oh, I get this…

JANE: Mom, what does love feel like?

XIOMARA: Why?

JANE: Just curious. How do you know for sure you're in love?

XIOMARA: It sort of feels like your heart is glowing, if that makes sense.

That’s why in the first few episodes we could see Jane’s heart glowing whenever she was around Rafael. That’s the idea of love she’s built in her mind because that’s what her mom told her so many years ago.

3) Aww!

4) “I love you” “I love you so much” blaaaa! Am I the only one who thinks this is all too sudden? Please, this is the one question that I want you guys to answer. When you were at this point in the story, did you feel their relationship was rushed? Am I the only one who wasn’t in insta-love with them as they are with each other? Was this ship universally shipped immediately? Just say yes or no.

Well, at least they’re not moving in together yet. Although they might be by the end of this episode, probably.

5) Rogelio is going to be in a sci-fi telenovela, and I think that’s the best concept ever?

6) Ay, Xiomara…

7) Well, I may not be a fan of Michael, but…

Not only does he know Jane but he is also very supportive of her interests. That’s cool.

8) I think this kind of supports my theory that Jane might actually be the narrator in the show?

NARRATOR: Jane threw herself into her writing with a renewed energy and passion. And when Jane's writing was flowing, it was as if she had been transformed into another person, a woman named Juana.

The idea that she feels like someone else when she’s writing could easily be translated into her having a different voice as that person, you know? In this case, the voice of a Latino hunk.

9) Regardless of how I feel about this ship, this definitely was an amazing way to propose…

10) Damn!

That is so not what someone proposing wants to hear. But, as great as the proposal was, you really need to be super sure that you’re in a committed relationship in which both of you are on the same page and want the same things. Jane had declined his offer to move in together because she felt she wanted to take things one step at a time, even if they’d started their relationship all backward. The fact that he thought Jane would say yes just because that’s “the right order” to do things she’d envisioned her whole life further proves that they really don’t know each other at all.

11) And Xiomara and Alba are back at being Jane’s angel and demon on her shoulder. And again, I side with Xiomara. I tend to always see things through a similar lens than her.

12) Petra must be planning something. Is she going to make Lachlan bus tables or something?

13)

14) Ay, Alba, taking a compatibility test from a magazine is really NOT the answer…

15) Uh-oh…

I swear to god, if they finally fucking address this in a proper way with a sensible resolution, I will feel so vindicated.

16) Oh, what a fucking douchebag!

I hope he gets murdered, seriously. And Rafael, don’t you dare team up with this fucking piece of trash.

17) And as she’s questioning how much Rafael knows her, she runs into Michael and is reminded of how much he knows her. Gotta admit, the flashback where she was reading to him was kind of sweet.

18) Wow, indeed.

XIOMARA: I'm a little late. And I missed a pill or two this month. And I'm worried I might be pregnant.

He’s definitely not taking it too well, but he did really try to make Xiomara feel okay and not freak her out by freaking out.

19) Oh. Xiomara made it look like it was a joke, and now she’s getting the real reaction. This is not going to go down well.

20) I mean…

I get that they were trying to make a point of how little they know each other, but maybe they should’ve gone with something other than Jane testing how supportive of her passion he is because that’s probably the only thing he’s done well since day one. He’s always been the one pushing her to become a writer instead of a teacher, so, as much as I agree they really don’t know each other AT ALL, it doesn’t make sense for him to be unsupportive.

21) Oh, you got me good, show!

22) And what do you know? Jane is the one who messed up. Why would you tell him that “he passed a test”? I get why Rafael would be hurt, that’s not a good way to build trust with your partner and communicate.

23) I don’t know why but I’m not buying Aaron’s saint persona. I think he’s a closeted asshole who is trying to manipulate Petra. Like, that whole, “I won’t judge you” spiel he gave her right before they ate. If you won’t judge, then there was no reason to bring that stuff up right before she started eating.

24) Oh, Rafael, I really hope you’re coming clean to Petra to team up with her because if you’re really trying to blackmail her I will fucking lose my shit…

25) Ouch.

XIOMARA: My period is late.

JANE: But you're on the pill.

XIOMARA: I forgot one. Or two.

JANE: Mom…

XIOMARA: I know. I know. And I knew we should wait, but we got so caught up in the moment.

JANE: Caught up in the moment? You're not 16.

XIOMARA: It was an accident.

JANE: No. No, it wasn't. Me standing here pregnant, that's an accident. You were reckless. I mean, what's your plan? Are we gonna be pregnant together? Did you want to raise these babies like sisters?

XIOMARA: No. Look, I didn't have a plan…

JANE: Yeah, I know. Again. I'm sorry. I just thought… I don't know.I just thought that you would be more thoughtful if you thought about having another kid. Because of… Well, Me.

I get why Jane feels this way, but Xiomara is at a completely different place than she was when she got pregnant with Jane. She’s not a teenager anymore, and she’s already a mom. So whatever happens, she really doesn’t need a lecture because she’ll take care of her kid.

There’s also this underlying judgment every time motherhood comes up in a conversation between these two. Jane always makes it look as if Xiomara has been a terrible, absentee mother who did a terrible job and ruined Jane’s life by raising Jane on her own as a single mother. And… everything that I’ve seen so far proves otherwise? Xiomara is an amazing mother. She’s caring, supportive, understanding, loving, and honest. She may not be a traditional mom, and she might be a bit clueless at times, but she’s not a bad mom by any means, and the way Jane refers to her childhood and upbringing paints Xiomara in a very negative light. Jane is basically telling her that she’s going to ruin another baby’s life, and that’s kind of unfair. Like, what is so wrong and awful about being a single parent?

26) WTF

27) Yes, Petra, that is such a bold, courageous move!

RAFAEL: I didn't release the tape. It must have been Lachlan. I would never do something like that.

PETRA: Lachlan didn't release the tape. I did.

RAFAEL: What?! But why?

PETRA: Because as long as it existed, he could hold it over my head.

28) Good, Petra and Rafael are teaming up against Lachlan. Although it’s still unclear why Rafael told her he had the tape, his motives were left unexplained and it bugs me.

29) Jane should fucking follow her own advice…

So then date Rogelio and see where it goes. But go slowly. Take it step by step.

30) See? Xiomara is a fucking great mom, okay? So Jane’d better stop mom-shaming her from now on, I’ve had it.

XIOMARA: The time you found Michael's list in the book. That night the smile on your face you were so happy. Even though you'd only known each other a year, you didn't have any questions.

JANE: But it wasn't right.

XIOMARA: That's not the point. You know what it's like to be sure.

31) Good, she finally admitted that they’re moving too fast and that marriage is not a good idea just yet.

32) Why…?

This seems like a cheap gimmick? Why didn’t she tell her? She was about to, and then the author told her she liked a quiet massage, and she just accepted it?

33) Poor Rogelio…

Peach just doesn’t make him pop.

34) Aww, they’re moving in together! Xiomara and Rogelio, I mean. Not Jane and Rafel, ew.

35) ….

Like, I want Rafael and Jane not to be together because it doesn’t feel right to me, I’m not into it, but I don’t know if I want her to be with Michael either?

36) I knew it! I knew this dude wasn’t a saint!

37) Hope you enjoyed my recap, and, as usual, if you’ve got this far, thank you for reading! If you enjoy my recaps and my blog, please consider supporting it on ko-fi.Thanks!

[mascaracoffee]

A Baby Changes Everything ~Rafael Barba Imagine~

Summary: Rafael Barba had always been a stoic, career man who had stared into the face of many evil without so much as a quiver. It seemed the only thing he feared was this small raven haired baby with eyes like her mother and his last name. 

Attacked

Author’s Note: Someone had asked me about covering how Rafael would act/change when his child was born so I tied this into my story Attacked (this takes place before the events of Attacked). Also, I had originally had the idea for my Rafael Barba/ OFC (Kelly) as a chapter story but I am terrible at keeping those updated. So I’ve decided that only If people are interested (which means you have to comment/ message me!! ;) ) I will post snapshots of the story. For instance write events that pertain to the couple’s life that outlines their story without necessarily following a specific timeline or having filler chapters etc. Example: Kelly’s father interrupting Gabby’s baby shower, Kelly and Rafael’s first meeting, Kelly’s birthday, Kelly and Rafael’s first fight, Rafael proposing etc. Please let me know! I have a few weeks off from nursing school where I could work on them and I’m excited about some of the ideas!

“Objection, your honor! Relevance?”

“He called my witness’ character into question and suggested she was a part of a terrorist organization.” My five foot stature retorted back sharply as my brunette curls flew around me at the speed. My voice rising slightly to highlight the importance before turning slightly toward the defense and gesturing to him “He opened this door your honor and I intend to close it.”

A small smirk pulled at the older judge’s face.  The reputation of Kelly Barba’s was favored gossip in the judges’ chambers. They joked how for a woman of such small stature I could rule a courtroom with one expression, a force to be reckoned with especially in the court of law.

“Overruled”

I turned my attention back to my witness, Rafael chuckle slightly under his breath. Rafael had insisted he be my co-council despite how minute this case seemed. This was to be my last trial before the DA was placing me on mandatory maternity leave, an agreement we had reached much to my dismay. If I had it my way, I would be in court and have this baby right here on the marble tile while still receiving a conviction. I focused back on the task at hand and opened my mouth to inquire the next question whe-

There it was again.

An ache that started off dull before gaining momentum into a strong forceful cramp that kicked through my abdomen into my lower back. My entire body tensed at the feeling, eyes clenched shut and I took a sharp intake of breath my hand ghosting over the bump. Even with my back to my husband I could feel his intense green gaze leave his court notes and bore into me.

“Mrs. Barba” the judge called concerned “Are you alright?”

I nodded counting off the last twenty seconds in my head before the feeling slowly faded; I glanced at my watch to mentally record the time. After shuddering out a breath I straightened my spine and continued the questioning as I began to pace to work out the sore muscles in my abdomen. The questions continued along smoothly for the next fifteen minutes and then, like clockwork, the pain hit again.

“No more questions your honor” I bit out, grunting softly. “However, I would like to call for a recess.”

“A recess?” The judge asked with a humorous laugh “Mrs. Barba, it’s barely 10:30.”

“I realize the time your honor” I groaned softly as the wave of pain hit its peak and I reached behind me for support against the prosecution desk “But I don’t think my baby cares and if I’m right” I gasped again. “a recess would be greatly appreciated unless one of the jury members would like to catch this baby.”

I felt a hand ease around my waist as Rafi’s face appeared beside me. The concern etched in his face aged him by at least ten years, seeming to deepen the worry lines across his face. He gripped my hand which I squeezed tightly as the pain seemed to last longer. A horror stricken judge banged her gavel before declaring a recess until the prosecution could provide a new ADA.

“Your honor come on” the defense cried out as he stood, throwing his pen to the desk angrily “this is obviously a ruse by the prosecution for more time seeing as they have no case against my client.”

Rafael glared at the man and I could see an insult lying on his lips but I squeezed his hand to defuse his anger. We didn’t have time for this. Liv, Sonny, Finn and Amanda had stayed for the trial and were now standing, Finn keys in hand as the rest of the courtroom began to empty. As Rafael grabbed the briefcases I felt a ‘pop’ before a warm wetness coated my legs and dribbled down past my skirt onto the floor.

My eyes rose to meet the bewildered eyes of the defense attorney.

“In case you were wondering I don’t have a broken water bottle up there.”

Rafael stifled a laugh at my snark, shoving papers into the case, snapping it closed. before he and Sonny guided me to a squad car, believing it would be faster than waiting on an ambulance. Thanks to the blaring police sirens the crowds of Manhattan seemed to part like the red sea. I whimpered softly grabbing at Rafael’s hand.

“You’re doing so good Carino” he whispered kissing my hair. “Just breathe.”

Suddenly, the car lurched to a halt as Finn cursed mine and Rafi’s bodies jostling forward at the force.

“Traffic jam” Finn grumbled eyes peaking up through the review mirror before glancing around at the standstill traffic.

“Can you get to 32nd?” Liv asked from the passenger seat an edge to her voice as she took began to look around her mind pondering the next quickest route to the hospital.

“Cant’ bridge is been out for weeks” Finn replied back coolly.

“What? Is my wife supposed to give birth in the back of a squad car?” Rafael barked, sarcastic humor lacing his words.

“What do you want me to do councilor jump the curb onto the sidewalk?” Finn shot back locking eyes with Rafael through the rearview mirror.

“Well actually” Rafael challenged shrugging his shoulders as if it was an obvious answer.

Finn narrowed his dark eyes at Rafi. “Hold on councilors.”

I yelped as Finn indeed pulled the unmarked squad car onto the curb, bystanders crying out as they jumped out of the way of the moving vehicle bypassing the stagnant traffic. I clenched my eyes and cried out as another contraction hit, a new wave of dampness slicking my thighs. My brows furrowed and I pulled my skirt up slightly.  I whimpered at vibrant blood that coated my fingers.

“Rafi”

“What is-“ Rafael stopped mid-sentence as his eyes took in my frightened expression and the blood on my fingers. His face blanched.

Liv turned around in her seat and took in the scene. “Finn step on it.”

Within another 5 minutes of curbside driving and 4 of siren filled road speeding. We arrived at the hospital. Finally, I was placed in a bed, dressed in a mint green cotton gown a nurse on either side of me as they set up IV access and hooked up the monitors of the fetal heart monitor. Rafi stood in the corner of the room keeping an eye on me as he talked in feverish Spanish to his mother. He had removed his suit jacket and had rolled his sleeves up to his elbows, keeping his fingers carded in his usually perfectly styled hair. Dr. Purdy entered the room scrubbing her hands together to distribute the hand sanitizer as she monitored the baby’s heart rate on the monitor before turning to me as she pressed along my stomach.

“Ok Kelly we’re keeping a close eye on the baby right now but the bleeding is a concern.” This piqued mine and Rafael’s concern as he ended the call with his mother and replaced the nurse who was at my side gripping my hand. “We believe your placenta is obstructing your cervix so every time you have a contraction its squeezing the placenta which is making you bleed. Now, right now everything’s ok with both you and the baby but if the bleeding doesn’t stop within the next half hour we’re looking at a C-section.”

“Surgery?” I whispered in a small voice causing Rafael to grip my hand tighter. “But she’s early!”

“I know it wasn’t part of your birth plan” the doctor tried to soothe. “And yes she is early but only by a couple weeks. Her chances are very good.”

 I looked up at Rafael feeling tears prick my eyes. My husband studied my face, taking into consideration every doctor’s visit and every late night talk the two had every shared concerning their unborn daughter.

“A C-section would be the best option for the baby?” Rafael asked, a business like tone in his voice.

“At this point yes” Dr. Purdy nodded “I would prefer to wait the half hour just to see if things improve, right now things are stable, but I don’t want to wait too long and risk putting your wife and your baby in danger.”

Rafael nodded “I understand.”

The team of medical professionals left the room as I blinked up at Rafael clinging to his hand my eyes boring into his. Surgery wasn’t part of my plan at all. There were so many ifs, so many things that could go wrong! What if something went wrong and I bled out or worse what if something happened to the baby!

“I’m scared Rafi” I whimpered softly resting my head on the pillow tears wetting my eyelashes and blurring my vision. “I’m so scared. What if-”

“Shh” he cooed pushing my hair back softly with his free hand “I know you are, I’m scared too mi amor.”

“Wh-what if something happens to the baby?” I stuttered as my eyes flooded with more tears, causing them to pool down my face.

“You can’t think like that Kel” Rafael whispered pushing his forehead to mine and gently wiping my tears away “You know how we are damn good lawyers.” I smiled a soft, watery smile as I chuckled slightly causing Rafael to grin. “Yeah, you know what I mean. My wife stubborn as hell. In full blown labor yet still finishes her questioning.” Rafael grinned proudly “Well we have the damn good doctors for our baby. We have to trust them.”

“If she has your brains and snark do you realize how much trouble we’re gonna be in?” I chuckled wiping at my tears as my breathing began to even out. I placed my free hand over my bulging belly. A whimper fell past my lips as another contraction spiked through my body and I griped onto Rafi’s hand.

“She’s gonna be as gorgeous as her mother and I’m gonna have to make up bullshit charges on any boy that comes near her, have them spend time in the tombs.” Rafi smiled pressing his lips to my hand in an attempt to distract me from the pain.

“You’re gonna be such a good Papi” I smiled cupping his jaw. His lips pressed into a thin line and a flash of doubt and worry wavered through his green eyes. An internal battle had been waging inside Rafael since I broke the news to him I was expecting. Yes, he was thrilled at the thought of me carrying his child, however, he was weary of the thought of himself becoming a father. He didn’t have a good father figure to rely on growing up and was damned if he left the same impression on his own child.

The half hour seemed to pass by agonizingly slow and fast at the same time, during that time I had received an epidural to help with the contractions and was pleasently relieved from the pain despite feeling totally numb. My bleeding had not stopped and Dr. Purdy proceeded to book the OR. I giggled behind my hand as Rafael emerged from the adjoining bathroom in the hospital issued blue scrubs a far cry from his normal designer, tailored suits.

“Did they not have the Versace scrubs in stock?”

Rafi scowled playfully as he adjusted the stiff material across his midsection. He crossed the room and placed his precisely folded three piece suit into the hospital bag Sonny and Amanda had brought from home.  A sharp knock echoed through the room before a face appeared. Lucia’s wine colored lips spread into a smile as she entered the room carrying a steaming Styrofoam cup.

“How are you bebe?” she asked pressing a soft kiss to my cheek as she straightened the blankets of the bed in a motherly manner.

“I’m ok. Excited to finally meet this little girl.” I admitted caressing my stomach lovingly.

“You and me both.” She winked as she turned to Rafael and handed him the coffee. He thanked his mother with a kiss on the cheek before taking a large gulp.

“I’ll be a lot better when I can drink my coffee again” I pouted as I eyed Rafael’s cup. The smell of the freshly brewed Cuban coffee was torture. The moment I found out I was pregnant I gave up caffeine and anything else that could potentially harm or complicate the pregnancy. It had been a long few months without my beloved Iced caramel coffees with extra shots of espressos.

 “Rafi offered to quit with me until the baby was born but I’ve seen him go without caffeine for a few hours and that was bad enough I couldn’t imagine 9 months.” Rafael smirked at my comment before finishing the coffee and tossing the empty cup into the trash.

“Angelita, you give me my little princesa and I will buy that coffee for you by the gallons.” Lucia chuckled as she leaned over to give my hand an encouraging squeeze. The three of us continued to talk as the nurses ventured in and out preparing me for the procedure.

“Ya know Kelly” Lucia began from her seat beside the bed, the latest issue of People magazine in her lap. “Rafi in those scrubs reminds me of those boys in that show.. Oh! What do they call him? McDouble?”

I threw my head back in laughter “Do you mean McDreamy from Grey’s Anatomy?”

“Yes!” Lucia exclaimed clapping her hands together “That’s who he looks like!”

“Well I don’t know about McDreamy” a voice interrupted as Dr.Purdy entered with a kind smile “But he is about to become a McDaddy.” She smiled before looking at me. “Are we ready?”

Suddenly, my stomach filled my nervous gitters before I nodded. Lucia jumped up and kissed my cheek whispering a short prayer into my hair before releasing me as she tried to wipe away the tears that were pooling in her eyes.

“I’ll wait for your parents in the lobby, huh?” she smiled at me. I thanked her before she turned to Rafi grasping his cheek and kissing the other, she whispered words to him that I couldn’t hear. Rafael lowered his gaze and nodded before kissing his mother’s cheek.

“Alright” Dr. Purdy clapped her hands with a gleaming smile “Let’s have a baby!”

Delivery was a whirlwind of anxiety and jumbled nerves, scrubs and sterile fields. As the curtain separated Rafael and I from where the procedure was taking place, I began to chew my bottom lip nervously, there was a reason I went into law instead of the medical field. Rafael grabbed my hand and began retelling the story of how we first met, a useful distraction to the medical conversation happening just beyond the sterile sheet. Chuckling Rafael, reiterated how annoyed he was with the DA for assigning me to him feeling he was paid to babysit instead of prosecute. Yet, overtime he began to appreciate the knowledge I possessed and better yet the full nights of sleep he began to acquire thanks to my help.

Thankfully, Rafael’s story took my mind back in time to those events, halfheartedly distracting me from the tugging and pressure I felt at my belly, a sensation that caused my throat to tighten in a gag as I imagined the doctors moving my organs around. I kept my eyes locked on Rafael’s green ones that peered over the surgical mask so lovingly at me.  Suddenly, I felt the pressure release and a strangled cry fill the room as Dr. Purdy held a plump, raven haired little girl over the sheet declaring she was indeed a girl. I felt tears prick my eyes as my daughter was quickly wiped clean and placed on my bare chest. Her wails softly ebbed away to tender whimpers as her skin came in contact with mine. Her soft hair tickled my jaw and cheek as her chubby hand made a clutching motion, her fingertips gently tracing my opposite cheek.

The local anesthetic had already made me emotional but at the sight of my daughter tears were rolling down my cheeks a smile on my quivering lips as I glanced up at Rafael as he pulled his mask down. His lips were in an awe struck slightly parted state and his green eyes were glossy, locked on his daughter. He slowly, cautiously came closer kneeling to be more level with us.

“We have a daughter” I chuckled choking on my tears as I looked up at my husband in almost a stunned voice “we have our little girl Rafi”

Rafi’s eyes met with mine as a single tear slipped down his cheek he pushed my hair back, pressing his lips to my forehead repeatedly as he so gently pressed a hand to our daughters small back who was still spurting out small whimpers as her eyes dodged here and there taking in all the excitement. Rafael’s  hand showing just how small she was in comparison, he soothingly rubbed his thumb across the length of her shoulder blades.

“Thank you, thank you so much mi amor” Rafi whispered into my hair choking back more tears.

After what seemed like eternity, we finally had our daughter out in the world with us. We finally saw that she had Rafael’s dark ebony locks with had a slight curl she inherited from me, her eyes were a startling light blue that mirrored mine, a petite button nose nestled round rosy cheeks and Rafael’s expressive mouth. Our Gabriella Lucia Barba, named after both her grandmothers.

It was early into the next morning, nearing 3 am. Lucia and my mother had left only a half hour earlier, my father unsurprisingly absent from this beautiful milestone much like many others in my life. Gabby slept soundly in the plastic crib beside me, the affection from her grandmothers having worn her out. Rafael stood just outside the door talking with Liv and Sonny, who had been thoughtful enough to bring by Rafi and I something to eat other than hospital food. Sonny especially excited to present our daughter with dozens of pink balloons and flowers. I smiled softly as I rested on the plush pillows behind me watching the beautiful little life I created breath soundly. I felt my heavy eyes flutter shut.

I groaned as I opened my eyes, the room was still dark except for the warm light the bed side lamp provided. Rafael sat beside the crib, his elbows resting on his knees, hands clasping together under his chin as stared at Gabby in the crib. An old Harvard sweatshirt and jeans replacing the scrubs he once wore. Gabby softly began to whimper quickly becoming more upset. I stiffly sat up, my stomach burning at the exertion.

“You can pick her up Raf” I said softly as I attempted to get comfortable once more. Rafael jumped at my voice, his eyes jumping from me to squirming Gabby.

“I-uh”

“I know you haven’t held her yet.”

Rafael looked to the ground sheepishly. Having spent so much time with Rafael, both personally and professionally I could read some of his best poker faces. He was afraid that much was obvious. His foot twitched, as he bounced his knee. He stood toe to toe in court with some of the most vile, cruel beings to walk this planet without batting a lash yet, his body was jittered with nerves over a small 6 pound baby girl.

“I don’t want to hurt her” Rafi admitted softly. “She’s so small and..”

“You won’t hurt her Rafi” I reached into the crib and pulled Gabby to my chest soothing her before looking at my husband. “Now come here”

I moved to the far side of the bed allowing room for Rafi to squeeze in beside me. I assumed he would prefer holding Gabby on the bed than standing up. Rafael was stiff as I gently placed our daughter in his arms, helping him place his hands appropriately. Gabby squirmed in Rafi’s rigid arms, her face reddening and contorting in discontent as she began to wail, Rafael’s face turning pale at the reaction.

“Just relax” I whispered pressing soft kiss to his shoulder, his body relaxing slightly. “She can sense you’re uncomfortable. Talk to her.”

Rafael chuckled condescendingly “ I don’t even know what to say.”

“well that’s a first” I chuckled “you’ve been talking to her for the past nine months. You even practiced your testimonies and arguments with her in the womb!”

Rafael rolled his eyes playfully as he seemed to slowly relax. He began to rock her slightly, the movement calming the newborn. Gabby’s blue eyes studied her father intently as he moved to gently wipe the crocodile tears away from her cherub cheeks.

“You’re gonna give your papi a hard time with those eyes aren’t you?” he began, offering an awe struck smile at his daughter. “Yeah, I know you will. Your mami gives me that same look and she always wins me over.”

I felt my chest fill with warmth watching Rafael interact with Gabby, he was slowly emerging from his shell. Putting any doubts he had about his fathering skills to rest. Slowly, Rafi stood from the bed rocking Gabby gently in his arms as he began to pace the room. I felt my eyes start to become heavy again, probably from the pain medicine.

“Your papi can get you into Harvard with one phone call”  he whispered “Yeah, one of papi’s friends from law school is a Dean there, but you won’t need papi huh? You’ll be so smart. My little Gabriella will be a legacy! But you don’t have to go to law school mi princesa. You can be whatever you want to be. That’s right! You can be a lawyer or a doctor maybe a teacher like your abuelita, whatever your little heart desires….Papi will love you regardless”

I felt my eyes flutter shut, Rafael’s words painting a permanent smile on my face as his words lulled me to sleep.

“You’re my greatest gift mi princesa. I don’t deserve you or your mami. I love you both so much.”

                                          Gabby’s First Night Home

A groan passed my lips, my hand venturing out toward the opposite side of the bed in search of Rafael’s warm body to cuddle into. My hand met cool sheets causing me to pry my eyes open.  Rafael’s side of the bed was wrinkled but empty. I pushed myself up my hand bracing my incision. I glanced at the clock on the bedside.

4:23

‘He’s probably working in his office’ I thought.

My bare feet hit the chilly hardwood floor, sparking a shiver up my spine. I tied my robe around my waist and softly walked toward Gabby’s door to check on her. Her door was slightly ajar and I pushed it further open with my palm.  I was surprised to see a sleeping form on the futon across from Gabby’s crib. I tiptoed toward the center of the room. I peeked into the crib to see Gabby’s chest rising and falling steadily. Turning to my husband, I knelt down to his level. Rafael slept deeply, stretched out on his stomach, one arm hanging off the side of the futon that was across from Gabby’s crib. I smiled softly and caressed my fingers through his dark locks.

“Rafi” I whispered, continuing to run my fingers through his hair. He moaned softly leaning into my touch. He slowly opened his eyes to meet mine.

“Hm?” he groaned.

“Let’s go back to bed” I whispered.

Rafael groaned sitting upright running his hand over his face roughly.

“She alright?” he questioned nodding toward the crib as he fought a yawn.

I nodded “She’s fine.” I rubbed his arm softly “Let’s get you to bed”

Rafael stared past my shoulder toward the crib “She’ll be so far away..” He trailed off. “What if she needs us?”

“Rafi” I smiled “She’ll let us know. Have you forgotten she has a set of Barba lungs on her.” I chuckled softly “In the unlikeliness anything should happen, Sonny bought us that contraption that monitors her breathing and everything and besides we have the video monitor you can watch her on your phone in bed.”

Rafael’s eyebrows flew up, disappearing into his messy hair as he looked at me. “It can do that?”

I giggled and nodded. “We have to learn to sleep when she sleeps and your back needs memory foam not a futon especially since you sit hunched over a desk most of the time.”

“I know it’s just” he sighed heavily running his hands roughly over his face again “I can’t explain it”

I moved to sit beside him, wrapping my arms around his left bicep and intertwining our fingers, resting my cheek on his strong shoulder.

“You’re a daddy now” I whispered “You’re just worried about your little girl.”

“I worry about both my girls” he whispered pressing his lips to my hair.

“Well, since you’ve taken care of that little girl. Why don’t you come spend some time with this one?” I whispered softly biting at his neck playfully. Rafael cut his eyes over his shoulder at me smirking.

“I can repay you for all those massages you gave me…”

Between Rafael doubling his already stressful workload in order to have a less stressful time off with Gabby’s birth and my own work load intimacy of any kind had become difficult, even cuddling had become a burden finding it a hassle to find a comfortable position with a large watermelon in your stomach that liked to roundhouse kick your ribs at the slightest inconvenience. To say the least I strongly missed my husband’s affection.

I leaned forward pressing my lips to his. Rafi tilted his head deepening the kiss I moaned softly into his mouth as he pressed his left hand to my check, the coolness of his wedding band a stark contrast to my flushed cheeks.

“Mmm” Rafael sighed contently “Ok you’ve twisted my arm carino I’m coming.”

I smiled in triumph, standing up and approaching Gabby’s crib to check on her once again, she was still sleeping soundly completely undisturbed. I heard Rafael groan as he stood, stretching. I stood by the door and smirked shaking my head. Rafi had stalled, stopping to gaze over into Gabby’s crib his hands shoved in the pocket of his sleep pants, a far off dream-like look on his face.

Despite whatever he might think of himself as a papi, fatherhood looked good on Rafael.

                                                 Gabby - 3 Weeks Old

“And you have all of the numbers for the doctor? The pediatrician? Mami? Sonny, Liv? Carmen if you need me and I’m in court right? What about Ms. Christmann next door?” Rafeal rattled off as he stood cradling Gabby in his arms dressed in his suit as he prepared to go back to his first day back at work. He held her close, her bum resting on his forearm as he cradeled her head softly. A far more comfortable posture and position than when he has first held her, now that he was more comfortable he would barely put her down.

“Yes Rafi I have everything” I sighed exasperated as I prepared his thermos of coffee. I appreciated his concern yet he had gone over this list of phone numbers 4 times since waking up this morning not to mention the 6 other times last night as he formed an emergency plan in case one was needed. I was a little anxious staying home by myself with Gabby it was just comforting having someone else there to help especially when tending to a newborn was still a new, daunting task.

Rafael looked at me with a small smirk and a curved eye eyebrow. “What’s Carmen’s number?”

I dropped the spoon I had used to stir my own coffee allowing it to fall on the counter with a clank “I don’t have it memorized I have it written down. What the hell?”

Rafael chuckled kissing Gabby’s head. “Papi will come see his little princessa for lunch, would she like that, huh?”

“Momma will” I smiled walking around the counter to place Rafi’s full thermos next to his suitcase.

“Mmm” Rafael mumbled against my lips as I hugged myself to his side. “God I hate to leave.” He sighed looking down at Gabby and leaning his head against mine.

“Its only for a couple hours babe” I reasoned snuggling into his side inhaling his expensive designer cologne and the smell of coffee that always seemed to cling to his frame.

“I know but what will I miss in those couple hours?” Rafael argued, almost whining. Nuzzling his nose into Gabby’s dark hair and peppering her soft skin with kisses.

“Mmm a few dirty diapers, four or five naps, maybe a bath depending on much milk she decides to wear instead of eat” I giggled stroking Gabby’s round cheek.

“Much more entertaining than going over case files” Rafael smiled.

“Rafi if you don’t leave you’re gonna be late mi amor” I spoke softly, hating to break this intimate moment.

“I know, I know” Rafael sighed in aggravation before almost cringing. “Do it quick, like a band aid.”

Swiftly, Rafi placed Gabby in my arms and slipped his arms through his coat, grabbing his briefcase and coffee. The small girl seemed disgruntled before realizing the swap and becoming fussy. Rafael looked torn and utterly heartbroken as Gabby began to twist and turn in my arms whines and cries falling from her lips.

Raf came forward cradling my head and pressing his lips to mine before kissing Gabby on the head.

“Ill text when I get to the office.” He said still looking torn and helpless “I love you and I love you my princessa”

“love you too daddy” I winked as he blew one last kiss and left for the day and I focused my attention to my spoiled daddy’s girl.

The day had gone by smoothly. I was able to catch up on a lot of the housework and laundry as well as finishing the last of the thank you cards from Gabby’s shower. Rafael came by and had a quick lunch before being called in for a case by Liv. I was able to spend the afternoon playing with Gabby before she decided it was time to nap a notion I agreed upon. After a restful sleep I began to prepare dinner and for Rafael to arrive home.

I had fajitas cooking on the stove while Gabby slept in her bouncer that I had positioned on the counter so I could keep an eye on her.  The jingle of keys and the door closing made me smile as I lowered the heat on the chicken and veggies.

“Are we ready to see Daddy?” I smiled unbuckling Gabby and placing her to my chest. I walked to the front hall and frowned when I saw it empty. I turned to his office and found him already hunched over scribbling over an open case file.

“Dinner will be ready in five” I said softly walking into the room that was lined with numerous volumes of law books. A few phots of our relationship lined Rafi’s desk. As I rounded the corner Rafael still hadn’t answered.

“Rafi” I said softly, touching a hand to his shoulder.

Rafael jerked in my direction. “Sorry carino Im gonna be busy tonight”  he sighed waving to his desk.

“Oh ok” I said solemnly. “Do you need anything?”

“No gracias carino”  he didn’t even look up from his papers.

I sighed closing his office door before turning back to the kitchen. I quietly ate and fed Gabby before cleaning her up and preparing her for bed. With still no sign of Rafael I curled up on the couch with a book that I had been using as a distraction from hard cases while I was pregnant.  After rereading the same sentence thrice I slammed the book shut and rubbed at my eyes angrily.

I had been disappointed in Rafael’s first day back at work. Since we met, he has always been work focused and at the time so was I. But now with Gabby, I had hoped he would carve out time for her once he got home, not hide in his office when she had only seen him for a fleeting moment that morning and her time with him was cut short at lunch. I stood up and walked to his office.

The anger that had bubbled inside began to fizzle away as I took in his appearance. In the short hours since I left him, Rafael had rolled his sleeves up to his elbows and his hair was a disshevled mess worry lines etched deep into his tan skin.

I kneeled beside him placing my hand on his knee.

“Rafi” I said softly “what’s going on?”

He sighed heavily throwing his pen down on the stacks of papers and files and leaning back, roughly scrubbing his face with his hands.

“This damn case” he hissed. “Sex trafficking with the usual side charges of rape, sexual assault, kidnapping the list goes on..” he took a deep breath. “The pictures..” he shook his head and I noticed his green orbs were red and glassy “every time I saw one of those kids.” He choked on his words “I saw Gabriella.”

I felt my heartbreak as I watched the few tears slip past Rafi’s dark lashes, he quickly wiped them away.

“Its crazy, huh?” he sniffed wiping at his eyes “Before I could handle these cases and now I’m a blubbering mess.”

“Rafeal” I cooed softly standing to my feet, I pushed his chair away from the desk and straddled his lap hugging him close, his arms wrapped around my torso resting low on my back as he rested he cheek on my chest. I carded my fingers through is hair allowing my nails to lightly scratch his scalp.

“It makes me want to work even harder” he chocked “for her and for you. I want to keep you two safe.”

“Mi amor”  I whispered running my fingers through his hair “You know I appreciate everything you do for me and now for our family and Gabby, she knows her Papi will take care of her.” I kissed under his ear and felt him shiver beneath my fingertips.  “I think your fatherly side will only make you an even better lawyer, make you want to fight even harder. Just…” I bit my lip debating if I should continue with my sentence.

“Just what carino?” Rafael implored.

I locked my eyes with his “Just promise me you won’t lose yourself to your work. Yes, these cases require a lot of you but don’t let it take all of you. Gabby deserves that much.”

Rafael nodded a look on his face that implied he was lost in thought. I pressed my lips to his softly desperate to break him out of the dark places of his mind, the dark places were bad cases were locked away in. Rafael responded pulling me closer, relaxing back into his seat as he cradled my cheek swiping his tongue over my lips.

Suddenly, a high pitched crying was heard and we pulled apart. I rested my forehead on Rafi’s and breathed out heavily amused.

“That would be your daughter sensing someone is getting your love and affection besides her.” I giggled.

Rafael smiled, a true genuine smile. “Well I best not leave my princesa waiting.”

He stood and began walking to the door of his office while I took a seat back down in his chair and began looking over the case file and Rafi’s notes. Moments later Rafi appeared back at the office door cradeling Gabby, a look of pure joy on his face as he softly bounced the little girl. His eyebrows knitted together as he looked at me.

“What are you doing carino?”

I smiled up at him. Seeing him with our daughter was a sigt I would never get tired of.

“I figured I would be nice and have a second set of eyes look over this stuff for you so you can spend some more time with Gabby.”

“Kel you don’t have to do that”

I shrugged “I want to.”

Rafael smirked “What would I do without you carino?”