#just do it‼️‼️ you may miss out on so many wonderful stuff

[beartitled]

GUYS THEM

I

GUYS

💕💞❤️LOOK AT THEM 💕❤️💞

I once again spread the list™️ of Narry bros content

Narry, Narry & Narry!

The remake that no one asked for!

The first interaction of the Narry bros! Yippeee!!!

Also the time when I got closer to @beartitled & @braisedhoney 🥹

Original 👇

[akaakeis]

gnawing at my nails rn i miss my bf (i dont have one) how do u pick like,,, one person to selfship with bc⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️

like there r so many options ushijima i dont even know who's my favourite character rn ushijima like guys☹️⁉️⁉️

BUT I cant wait for savyaku😼😼😼😼😼 SOCUTE

goshiki is my babey though he is sososososososososo cute and i would want him irl and i bet i could even pull him irl toooo

yk what this type of starting is called! a HOOK sentence cuz u got HOOKED and now ur reading this long ass ask. WAIT FUCJ mattsun guys hear me out here ANYWAYS. HRU SAV!!!!!!!!!!!! its 4am for yew rn right!!

anyways.. its 4pm havent had lunch yet am so fucking tired but soft rice.. soft white rice.... i want to sleep but rice....... call me basic but soft white rice is the best fucking thing in the entire world right after u. teacher gave my english composition an 80 i think ill end up on the news. i just stood up abruptly and the world went 🌀🌀🌀🌀 should i be worried..!!!!

THERE WAS AN OWL ON OUR ROOF THE OTHER DAY SO COOL i almost started writing akaashi hurt comfort (???) at school today but i didnt get time and now im Too Tired :(

im reading and the mountains echoed by khaled hosseini and erm. the plot is so questionable at times like wdym the guy was in love with his chauffeur wdym she tried to kill her sister and changed her mind last second so it was only paralysis but its ok bc she killed her fr next time. wdym this one girl dated her moms ex and then married her friend's ex like guys.. guys i have Questions..

IDK IF U READ JJK MANGA BUT U SHOULD READ JJK MANGA

i cant wait for ur birthday #weirdkidthings Im So Funny Guys Im So Funny

im going to sleep so hard tonight grrgrgrhrgrg i had ice cream on the way home from school YUM and then math kid era p2 i finished this one thinf before everyone else even started and the teacher asked if i did it qt home cuz wtf. ew now i remember her using her nail to create indentations in the paper and i feel nauseous my skin is crawling

WHATEVER eRmmrmrm im sitting on the stairs rn hashtag procrastination ahahahahah ive been writing this and zoninf out for the past 7 minutes yyyyyippeeee

im so tired guys let me sleeeep

my parenrs were supposed to find baby gender today but the little shit kept its legs shut and didnt let them see (just like me frl)

correction im lying on the stairs rn ..

honestly me x goshiki would be Bomb why is he so unpopular all his fics are mid or questionable so far,,,, anyways. konoha is so beautiful i would want him excpet i have like no grip on his character so #tweaks. i hate andrew tate so fkn much. i cant wait till i turn 16 idk i feel like life will be significantly cooler then. anyways bb i take my leave gotta go eat lunch

i hope youve eaten by the time ur reading this!!! stay hydrated and safe and dm me to be silly together whenever >:]]]]] i hope u have a WONDERFUL day sav!! ily <3

look at my man hes so gorgeous btw

alina... bf... :D alright then! umumumummm honestly there were many characters that i wanted to do a selfship with but i didnt want to be self shipping with the same character that someone im following consistently self ships with LMAO cause i feel like it gets weird for me at that point cause all the hcs in my head get mixed up? ANYWAY i just think of selfships with any character im hyperfixating on at that very moment... in fact my selfship very well may change!!!

anyway since im replying after you decided on yuulina... NOYA AGHHH U GUYS WILL BE SO CUTE TOGETHER!!! IM UR NO 1 SUPPORTER THIS IS YUULINA SUPPORT CENTRAL‼️‼️‼️

savyaku sounds so funny i need to thank of something that sounds better stop rn 💔 BUT I LOVE HIM SO SO SO SO SO MUCH IM SUPER EXCITED TO DO SOME SELFSHIP STUFF :))

u would so pull goshiki irl 🙂‍↕️

HELP thanks for the english lesson lina 😭 those terms always make me shudder because they were drilled into my head in my college comp class it was horrifying. and NO not mattsun i do NOT approve of that at this point in time!!!! AND IM OKAY!! tired as hell and i have 3 projects to work on <3 (i stacked my classes this year, im not proud.) IT IS NOW 3 PM AS I ANSWER THIS ASK SO SORRY IT TOOK ME LIKE 12 HOURS WOAH

honestly u were probably tired because you didn't eat but i digress... AND SOFT WHITE RICE HAS MY HEART IT MAY BE AN ASIAN THING?? and awh stawp😋 ARE WE TALKING ABOUT THE ENGLISH TEACHER THAT YOU CORRECTED IN CLASS? THE ONE THAT CANT SPEAK AS WELL AS YOU?? insanity 😨 i may end up on the news as well. AND YOURE PROBABLY HUNGRY AND DEHYDRATED GO EAT AND DRINK WATER IF YOU HAVENT ALREADY WHAT??? PLEASE TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF!!

WHAT AN OWL ON THE ROOF THATS SUPER COOL!! bro i love owls :( and ugh i get what u mean i feel like sometimes the time just slips away... but its okay! you'll have time at some later date <3 make sure you rest enough!!

guys what my jaw just dropped?? THOSE WERE THE MOST RANDOM PLOT POINTS YOU COULDVE LEFT ME WITH. NOW IM JUST CONFUSED? KINDA WANNA READ IT NOW (my readlist has 100+ books on it)...

AND IVE READ SOME OF IT BUT IM NOT UP TO DATE RN I HAVENT HAD MUCH TIME TO CATCH UP RECENTLY

im excited for your bday too!! im trying to math away the time differences in my head so like i would dm at 12 pm the day before your bday so i would catch u at midnight i THINK.

i hope u are having an AMAZING sleep rn alina!!! and u are so smart <3 barf ur teacher needs to stop doing that thats lowk unsanitary? in my book

HELP ME NOT THE JS LIKE ME FR 😭😭 hopefully u guys are able to figure out the gender soon!! im so excited for you guys <33

goshiki is under appreciated as a character honestly and i think its cause of his fuckass haircut 😭 NO OFFENSE TO YOU WHATSOEVER IM SORRY!! HES CUTE BUT THE HAIR IS NOT FOR ME. when i saw him shirabu AND tendou i was like "what the HELL is wrong with shiratorizawa they are all fucked" no they werent they had semi and ushijima BUT THAT WAS FIRST IMPRESSION ANYWAY also konoha UGRHSHSBNDMSJABD hes so!!! so!!! yeah!!! i love him sm... also how did we get on the topic of andrew tate hes such a weird guy i dont like him 💀 AND SO REAL im excited to be 16 <3

AND I HAVE!! make sure u eat something nutritious before school! and drink some water!! i hope your day is lovely <3 ily!!

[blxetsi]

modern eren jaeger dating headcanons

lowercase intended !

college!eren jaeger x gn!reader

warnings: mentions of p*rnhub

- firstly, this man is CONVINCED it was love at first sight (he ALWAYS tells you this too)

- "babe when i met you i just KNEW you were gonna be mine" "no you didnt" "yes i did- hey dont stop holding me 😣"

- you guys met because you were tutoring him. (he was failing history 😔💔)

- after weeks of shy touches and shared giggles he FINALLY brought his grade up and didnt need you anymore

- that didnt mean he didnt want you tho ;)

- asked you out on a date (and by that i mean to a party smh 🙄)

- and the rest is history 😌✨

- hes the kind of guy that flirts with you even though youre together

- "so uh,, you come here often 😏"

- "eren youre in my apartment 😐"

- he tries to invite you everywhere that he goes with his friends

- like,,, EVERYWHERE

- jean and reiner wanna organize a boys night ? hes pulling out his phone getting ready to text you and saying "oh is it okay if y/n comes ? i didnt get to see them much this week i miss them 🥺" like mf this is for The Boyz 😡😤🥶🥵🔥‼️

- youre weirdly close with sasha, shes just really cool

- eren will call you at the most inconvenient times for the stupidest reasons

- one time he called you while you were doing an INTERVIEW for work and you wanna know what he called you for ? to tell you he bought a bunch of silly string to use on jean.

- bitch im trying to get PAID. rn . trying to make a LIVING. so i dont end up below the POVERTY LINE. tell me about ur silly string after i secure the bag 🙄‼️

- is very touchy. like very touchy.

- but also respects bounderies

- hes NEVER mad when you have something to say about him or your relationship together

- you dont feel comfortable with the pda ?? He Wont do it Again

- you think you two could work on communicating better with each other ?? hes already googling ways to do that

- he cares and cherishes you and the bond you two have created together, hes not gonna try and ruin that

- is a fucking lightweight. dont go with him to parties.

- but if you asked him to hold his drink he will NOT forget about it.

- a couple times he broke the plastic cup he was gripping it so hard 🤩

- is also the type of guy to just protect others ?? like for no reason

- he sees a guy trying to get close to a girl who had made it abundantly clear that she didnt want that ?? hes going over there and playing bf to protect that stranger

- he can thank first year drama class for his superb acting skills 😌✨

- will literally help anyone he sees in a bind

- also his brother is weirdly cool ??

- his parents live far away but his brother only lives like,, 40 minutes away from the university

- hes like an older brother to everyone 🤩

- if you like reading classic literature zeke is your guy to talk to. has so many ideas and opinions on those stories and stuff, and will NOT hesitate to lend you a book of his

- eren has led lights in his room. he ALWAYS has them on the colour red

- he doesnt understand why ppl think hes horny bc of the red lights ?? his eyes just adjust better to the red lights compared to the blue 😔

- he has stretch marks all over his body 🤩 like on his biceps, tummy, back, thighs, etc. etc. doesnt really think about them anymore but he used to be SO self conscious of them in highschool. he saw berty (bertholdt) with his shirt off once during his freshman year and saw how he had stretch marks too, and immediately thought they were cool

- he likes to play with your hair and scratch your scalp, but he likes it when you braid his hair because he thinks it makes him look pretty

- will get you weird things because they remind him of you

- one time he came to pick you up for your date and before you could even KISS HIM hes pushing you away and pulling out a tiny ceramic frog 😐

- "no you dont understand zeke took me to a thrift store today and i found this and it reminded me of you-" "i look like a frog to you ? is that what youre saying ?" "NO ! its just so cute, and youre so cute so i had to get it. do you like it 😊"

- doesnt like most meats, his only exceptions are chicken,

- thats it 😐

- you guys were having a picnic and you made sandwichs (with the sliced turkey meat) and he took one bite out of it, looked you in your face, and spit it back into the baggy without breaking eye contact

- likes just laying in bed with you. has a playlist of songs like arctic monkeys and shit like that, just sitting in the dark with a song on low volume, whispering whatever he wants into your ear is like,, the DEFINITION of love in his book

- also can and will recite lines from shakespeare plays to you ?? will be at the most randomest times. you could be sweeping and he'd just wrap his arms around you before whispering "two households, both alike in dignity. in fair verona where we lay our scene. from ancient grudge break to new mutiny, where civil blood makes civil hands unclean."

- okay mf this isnt english class 😐‼️ but thank you 😁👍

- will always try and do new tiktok trends and make funny videos so he can "blow up"

- he gets on average like 20 views 🤩

- he likes seeing you and his friends get along, it just makes him so happy that you love mikasa and armin just as much as he does, and hes so thankful that youre all friends

- likes to help you reach whatever you cant, and if youre taller (even by an inch) hes making you grab things for him

- he doesnt have a major yet, and he doesnt really know what he wants to do with his life, but being a hairstylist sounds cool

- whenever youre having a bad day mentally, he'll just give you your space unless you say otherwise

- he doesnt know if its the best idea, but he knows when he gets into a bad headspace he wants to be alone

- if you do say you want him with you, he'll lie right beside you in bed and spoon you, and if you want he'll put on the arctic monkeys playlist and whisper about the project he worked on for his business class

- he doesnt like sharing, BUT will steal your shit all the time 🙄

- "oh hey heres that thing i borrowed from you" "oh my fucking god eren i thought i lost that months ago"

- may not understand everything he learns in class, but he always tries bc this is his education !! his parents saved up a lot of money for him to be able to go to university !! hes gonna try his best to make the most of this

- i feel like he would play baseball at university. he asks that u wear his jersey to every game so "everyone knows that the most beautiful person attending this educational establishment is MINE" like,, k ill wear the jersey 🙄🤚

- has a list of the best websites to use to illegally stream movies, anime etc.

NSFW ! -------

- also hates pornhub. knows about all the controversies and shit about the website and doesnt use it. supports smaller porn companies that respect their workers 😁👍

- his parents love you. Im Serious

- carla asks about you all the time (hey mommy 😏) and his dad wonders about you too even though hes more lowkey about it

- always has to open the door for you or pull out your chair for you. no matter what setting youre in he Has to do it bc hes a gentleman

- bohemian rhapsody is his comfort film

- i think eren thinks that Youre the One for him, and this idea is solidified when you two graduate together 😍

- he takes you back to the library where he first met you, gives you a promise ring and just asks you to move in with him, hes not ready for an engagement and he knows you arent either, but he knows that youre it for him, and he just wants to be with you for as long as youll allow it

GAH this felt all over the place and very mediocre but i hope you enjoyed !!! remember asks are open so feel free to request something 🤩

[crystalglassjar]

🦋 Butterfly Baby 🦋

-🦋 Butterfly Baby 🦋-

this isn’t exactly a fanfic but not exactly a list of headcanons either. it’s basically an “I suck at writing but I’ve already planned out an entire story”. is there a beginning, climax, and satisfying ending? no lmao

-📋 story description 📋-

xiao and hu tao get together and have a family. hu tao is 19 at the start of this fic if you’re wondering. I just really needed to get this story out my system...hehe...and reply to this post if you can figure out why the story is called Butterfly Baby

-‼️warnings‼️-

mild spoilers, also this was written on 2/7/2021 so some stuff might seem incorrect after more story quests come out. also major character death if you read the alternate ending

-📜 the actual writing 📜-

• hu tao and xiao start hanging out together (aka hu tao comes to bother xiao and eat almond tofu with him whenever he stops by wangsheng inn)

• xiao eventually grows fond for hu tao but makes many attempts to keep her at an arms distance, all of which were in vain

• xiao and hu tao are both in denial about being in love but obviously xiao takes his denial to a whole other level

• xiao doesn’t visit the inn for 2 weeks but eventually caves and goes back because he missed hu tao the silky texture of almond tofu

• ganyu finds out after overhearing verr goldet (desk lady at wangshu inn) reporting back to ningguang about her observations

• ganyu thinks it’s an exaggeration until she goes to wangshu inn for some business affairs sees xiao and hu tao chatting over some almond tofu and tea

• xiao pretends to not notice ganyu peering from behind a wall

• xiao brings it up during ganyu’s adepti training (ganyu story quest) and she just looks away and apologizes

• xiao knows she wouldn’t tell anyone so he doesn’t bother making her feel even worse than she already does

• xiao and hu tao start actually dating (in secret) but it’s hard to keep at least a few people from noticing an adepti and a funeral parlor director walking near the outskirts of town

• xiao once again tries to distance himself because he feels like he’s not worthy of her love after all the people he’s killed and that an adeptus can’t be with a mortal, hu tao shuts that argument down with “but I don’t care”

• hu tao is a bit hurt that he thinks it matters if she’s a mortal

• she laughs at the rumors that she’s dating an adeptus even if it’s true

• zhong li eventually hears about the rumors and is pretty sure it’s true because hu tao comes to his statue everyday and recently brought up questions about love

• fast forward 10 months of hush hush dating and he finally proposes. no ring or anything fancy, just a simple “do you want to get married?” while they stood at the peak of guyun stone forest

• hu tao says yes without even thinking about it and immediately kisses him and starts excitedly talking about wedding plans that she totally hasn’t been thinking about for the past 3 months

• xiao comes to ganyu to ask for help with wedding planning and ganyu nearly looses her head when she hears him say “so I’m engaged now..”

• hu tao somehow convinced zhong li to help her with planning

• zhong li isn’t too shocked about the engagement but hopes that xiao knows what he’s getting himself into

• hu tao, with a lot of effort, convinces xiao to move into the wangsheng funeral parlor with her

• xiao has a tough time adjusting to mundane life (haha get it because- no? not funny? ok I’ll stop)

• it doesn’t take much negotiation with ningguang to secure a venue at yujing terrace

• xiao would’ve preferred a private wedding at jueyun karst but didn’t know how to ask cloud retainer about it

• one month of planning later and they get married at yujing terrace

• basically everyone in Liyue attends the wedding including traveler

• the adepti got their invites delivered from ganyu and watched the wedding from afar

• I know nothing about Chinese weddings so uhhhh that’s for the reader to dream about

• hu tao throws a flower ball made of silk flowers into the crowd (customs of liyue, volume 1)

• may or may not have forgotten about contraception during their wedding night.....

• too embarrassed to go down to bubu pharmacy get morning after medicine

• hu tao prays to rex lapis that she won’t get pregnant

• zhong li, sipping his tea: I pretend I do not hear

• xiao doesn’t know if he should tell hu tao about zhong li being rex lapis so he just hopes he’ll never have to reveal that secret

• xiao nearly breaks his skull on the wall when he realizes what he’s getting himself into

• people of Liyue are still in shock about an adeptus marrying a mortal (since they were never confirmed to be dating beforehand) and nearly explode with buzz when the funeral parlor director starts growing a baby bump

• “have you seen the wangsheng funeral parlor director? last time I saw her, it looked like her belly was growing a bit. do you think she’s pregnant? oh my archons, a half adeptus baby? I can’t believe it!”

• xiao asks zhong li if he can go out an order a crib, rocking chair, baby clothes, etc for him

• zhong li obviously says yes

• fast forward 9 months and hu tao goes into labor just an hour before the funeral parlor was closing for the day

• zhong li rushes hu tao to her room and tells the undertakers to fetch the midwife

• hu tao calls for xiao and of course xiao is there within 10 seconds

• midwife nearly shits herself when she walks into the bedroom and sees an adeptus

•the midwife nervously asks if xiao was the father

• there was a popular (false) rumor going around that hu tao had an affair with zhong li and the baby was his, mostly because people refused to believe that hu tao was pregnant with a half adeptus baby. these rumors were only fueled further when zhong li was overheard asking a shop keeper if he should order multiple sizes of baby onesies just in case.

• zhong li just nods his head and xiao looks away in shame

• midwife gives helps deliver the baby while thinking “if I fuck this up, this adeptus is going to kill me”

• surprise! the baby is completely fine and healthy

• ganyu asked the qixing if she could take a day off (much to the shock of everyone who knew she wouldn’t even take her yearly vacation leave)

• ganyu has never ran so quickly down Liyue’s streets and nearly kicked down the funeral parlor door

• she’s super excited to know that there’s going to be another half adeptus in Liyue but is also incredibly worried about the idea of a half yaksha child

• I can’t come up with a name for the daughter so ill just call her daughter

• zhong li is named the god father and ganyu is the named god mother

• xiao and hu tao take the baby down to jueyun karst

• ganyu and cloud retainer both think the baby is such an adorable and precious little thing

• the rest of the adeptus are just like “xiao wtf...but ok”

• refer to my posts about xiao as a father if you want some more cute details but I don’t wanna just write a copy paste of my past post

• everyone at Liyue harbor is gossiping about it

• hu tao is a very fun and free mom and teaches the kid to become a tiny ball of chaos with the pyromania of klee and the sneakiness of yaoyao. aka the kid is now unstoppable

• pyro vision because of course

• hu tao teaches her daughter how to master pyro, how to write poetry, and most importantly, how to become a funeral parlor director

• the daughter actually prefers swords over poles and gets classes from the guhua clan, and more specifically,

• zhong li was very eager to give the kid a vision and was managed to get the pyro archons permission

• xiao confronts zhong li about the vision it in secret

• xiao: you gave her a pyro vision. do you know how destructive she will be? 

• zhong li, taking another sip of tea: ✨ I pretend I do not hear ✨

• hu tao overhears the conversation and puts two and two together

• hu tao and xiao have their first ever argument ever since they got married

• “why didn’t you tell me before?”

• “because it was a secret!”

• back and forth until they hear the baby waking up and crying

• they agree that there’s no point in arguing now and go off to calm down the baby

• they end up living a happy life as a family of three, and after hu tao’s death, xiao continues to raise the child as much as he can (with the help of zhong li and ganyu)

• their daughter becomes the 78th director of the wangsheng funeral parlor

~the end~

-↪️ alternate ending ↪️-

• osial somehow wakes up during one lantern rite

• xiao was distracted by a different, much smaller, demon

• the guizhong ballista and jade chamber had been repaired by now and were better than before, and they were able to defeat osial without sacrificing the jade chamber again

• however they didn’t get to the jade chamber fast enough and a small part of Liyue was destroyed

• one place in that part of liyue being the wangsheng funeral parlor

• xiao is overcome by grief because he believe it was his fault that he wasn’t able to protect this family

• he finally succumbs to the corruption

• what he didn’t know what was that hu tao did indeed die in the destruction, but his daughter (currently age 12) was still perfectly well and alive

• ganyu takes in the daughter

• zhong li took over the post as director after hu tao’s death and became the 78th director

• zhong li continued to teach the daughter about how to properly run a business and conduct flawless funerals

• the daughter becomes the 79th director of the wangsheng funeral parlor when she’s 18

• she also becomes the new demonslayer of the adepti, following in her father’s footsteps

• even through the trauma of witnessing her mother’s untimely death and being given the news that her father’s had also died, she made it through and raised a happy family of her own, while wearing the hat that her mom passed down.

~the end~

-📝 author’s note 📝-

ok...so that was longer than expected. let me know what you guys think! see any typos or anything off? please mention it! if you guys have a header for hu tao please do share~