#just absolutely clowning on his shit posture

[martritzvonmercie]

me talking about shinji is funny bc one second i'll be like "he is the perfect man he is HUSBAND MATERIAL he is beautiful he is everything" and then the next i'll be like "what the fuck. everything is wrong with him. he's so fucked up"

[justarandomhelluvablog]

alright it's official I'm rooting for Ozzie/Fizz/Blitz/Stolas polycule 👍

"You've lived rent-free in Fizz' head for years, so I can't help feel he values your take on things." - Ozzie going to Blitz for backup

"Well, my special skills are killing things without giving fucks and pointing out people's flaws... alright, count me in!" - Blitz being Blitz

"Come on, it's just like old times. I'll make sure no one gives you shit today." || "You mean besides you?" -Blitz & Fizz banter gives me life

Fizz covering Blitz' ass after Blitz insults Mammon, love that

Also another Fizz-Blitz banter moment: "He thinks he's funny." || "Offended." (Fizz & Blitz, respectively)

the ATTITUDE. Blitz coming in with the comeback and Fizz changing up his posture/attitude to match Blitz', just. Them.

He protect 🥺 but also the fact that he didn't kill this guy right here for everyone to see after seeing Fizz' expression hh

Blitz is so gentle with him now that they've made up I love him. We all know he's a softie underneath but ya know, ya love to see it

Don't have a screenshot for this bc it's a whole scene but can we talk about how before, Blitz claimed Fizz didn't have to try for anything, but in this episode Fizz is saying how he needs to do this to prove he's still good enough and Blitz (as well as Ozzie) are telling him he doesn't need to prove anything? Just. Ugh, THEM.

(also Fizz finally calling Blitz "Blitz" and not "Blitzo" I'm hhhh)

"That guy is a fucking dick, and he's USING you for everything, 'cause you're likeable, and he's a fucking trashfire."

Blitz' absolute worry when Fizz runs.....

Unrelated to Blitz and Fizz' relationship, are we gonna. Uh. Talk about how Fizz' scars aren't pure white? Blitz' are but Fizz' aren't (Blitz' scars are the same color as Fizz' foundation). I assume it's a stylistic choice to show that he hides his "undesired" markings here (the makeup comes off and shows his original markings, and having the area around it be different from his makeup better shows what's going on) and they're actually the same color but I thought it was interesting. Also the black of his horns is super faded out so...

And of course that whole scene with Ozzie was heart melting but enough people talk about that, so moving on-

FIZZ' SONG. God it was so good. And Mammon just dancing along... beautiful. Fizz quitting so publicly, YESSSS KING.

Anyway this

I hope we see more of them honestly. Blitz becoming Fizz' go-to bodyguard/Blitz just sitting in the rafters of his shows waiting for someone to be Weird™ would be so fun actually. But also probably the first time Fizz has been so DELIGHTED to see Blitz kill someone they are everything to me.

Again I would need a whole video but Fizz ripping his clothes as he goes as he sings his "I fucking quit" song, I hope it means we get to see him out of the clown costume/persona (tbh it would delight me if he ditches it for good, ripping it up isn't very good symbolism if you're just gonna put it back on again). I want to see more of who he genuinely is <3

VERY sad it took Fizz so long to finally see/understand what Blitz saw immediately. Wonder if things would have been different if Blitz had just... told Fizz what he really thought of Mammon when they were younger. If Blitz' opinion mattered so much... of course, maybe he did. It would explain why if Mammon was the one to separate them.

just them <3

"So, uh.... who tops?"

This is so funny but also Ozzie's smile I love that. They all know the answer.

[desertfangs]

DA here, JUST finished chapter 2 of the Lestat/Daniel NYC rendezvous and I'm in love! Listen, I *need* to know everything about this: "Do you? I seem remember when Armand tried to throw a surprise party for your birthday in 88, it was a disaster." You can't just throw in a line like that and leave us hanging pls 🥺 I can see Armand being furious at Daniel for not being able to keep his mouth (thoughts?) shut but then trying to play it cool in front of Lestat like "whatever I didn't even want to do it" when he'd never put that much of an effort into planning a party before 😭😭😭 "This is where I taught him to play Scrabble" I love when it all comes together like this, so perfect. The dynamic between Daniel and Lestat is god tier as expected, they get each other on a very basic yet human level, a true brotp for the ages. This though: "He brushed some hair out of Daniel’s forehead, fingertips light against his skin. Daniel’s breath caught. “You are quite the beauty, Daniel" lawd they're going for it 🥵🥵🥵🥵 "He had a pet? Other than you, I mean" LMFAO mean, but honestly if I were Lestat I'd be clowning Daniel left and right and viceversa. They deserve this and I'm so glad you're giving it to them! "Because the Armand I met, the one I fell in love with, he’s that guy. The one who got excited about stupid shit, who wanted to try everything and do everything. I wanted to be immortal so I could do everything with him forever", that truly sums it up doesn't it? Stunning. "I’m telling you because I think you’d really appreciate that part of him. If you give him the space to let loose, you two could really have a blast." L/A getting to be teenage disasters together is the solution to absolutely every single problem within the vc universe, I'm convinced. THE PICTURE OF THEM AT THE BAR, my heart. Daniel giving Lestat the Devil's Minion NYC tour with a good ol' dose of UST is everything I didn't know I needed tysm for this 🥹

DA!! I’m so glad you’re enjoying it, I promise Chapter 3 gets a little more spicy. 🥵🥵 

Okay, so here’s what I think happened for the surprise party. Armand was planning to have Louis bring him to somewhere in New Orleans, where the party was being set up. So they were conspiring and Daniel was doing a lot of the logistics and set up at the location. Lestat knows something is up but he can’t read Louis’ thoughts, but he senses Daniel in the city and… easy, right? Just get the boy to spill.

So he grabbed him and demanded to know. I honestly doubt he had to read his thoughts. Not saying Daniel didn’t put up a fight to keep the secret but I think it was obvious to Daniel that Lestat knew something was up and it was better to tell the truth than have him thinking it was something bad. I can totally see him trying to downplay his part, like “I told him it was a bad idea, but you know how Armand is…” 

I think Armand was more upset that Lestat cornered Daniel than at Daniel telling but that was also when things were getting tense between them, IMO, so perhaps there was some frustration on that end too. (I like to believe they still had a very good party! It just wasn’t a surprise! And Armand was pissed because he put a lot of work into surprising that ungrateful jerk (affectionate). *ahem*) 

Lestat is flirting with Daniel so hard and I think Daniel is just sort of like… He likes it, he’s into it, but he also doesn’t know if it’s just Lestat fucking with him or if he’s seriously like… interested in getting down and dirty, you know? Lestat is just Like That sometimes and it can be hard to tell if he’s sincere. (Don’t worry, he’ll figure it out.) 

I love Daniel trying to show him the Armand that he knows and loves. Like Lestat knows and loves Armand but Armand is such a freewheeling weirdo with Daniel and it’s not a side of himself that I think he shows easily or frequently, so it’s just like… yeah, you idiots could have fun, just stop posturing and trying to put on airs all the time. Lestat and Armand being teenage chaos disasters is just so full of epic possibilities and Daniel is into it. 🥵🥵 (No one ships Lestat/Armand like Daniel does, LMAO.) 

Gotta have the ust and angst! I’m glad you like the photo in the bar too, I like to imagine they really left their mark in places while they were in that city, for a short a time as they actually lived there. Armand and Daniel live hard. (Pun intended. It’s late and I’m not sorry. 😉)

[darthschabba]

I will never understand how this monster came into being.

I shall never understand how people got confused by him.

How he con ned them.

How he cashnoogled them.

How he has pulled the wool over the eyes of so many stupid stupid people.

You should have smelled his bull shit from miles away.

Everyone . Everyone should have felt and known what an absolute fuckfest he was gonna bring to the shityourpantschucklefucklefuck witt show.

First off.

He is physically ugly and so repellent to even look at.

His demeanor and posture should trigger warning bells in the bac k of your mind.

Your Spider-sense should already be tingling.

Every part of You should be triggered.

There is something wrong with this guy.

From 1500 feet away you should know this chucklefuck is going to shitt his pants or already has. And if he can , he will shit in your pants as well.

From his cheap cheap cheap looking style-less suits to the way he wears those stupid fucking long ties. You should know Something is most certainly wrong.

That face is fully ugly.

It is a big pile a beef.

He s not an attractive human being.

The fuckn hair.

That birds nest of straw and glue is

ridiculous.

His whole image is that of a clown.

A buffoon.

A ridiculous chucklefuck.

A moron.

But ... let's dismiss this.

Maybe you can't see well or you too are fashion impaired.

He has never ( ever ) ever done anything correctly in his entire life.

He was handed a huge fortune .

Which he pretended was his from hard work and genius. But like so many " billionaires " and other rich people it was inherited from some one else and they just let every one believe that it was their hard work.

He made his money from stealing from others. Year after year. Decade after decade.

When he wasn't out right grifting he was stealing by not paying people what he owed them.

He constantly low balled legitimate businesses into giving him services and merchandise at under cost just because he is such a shit of a person.

There is news articles and stories for decades about how he orders goods and services and products that are custom made just for him and he doesn't pay for them .

Many businesses have gone bankrupt or almost from his bullshit.

He s a liar. He s a known liar. A terrible human being. A shitty business man . A thief.

His charity was shut down because he was stealing from it.

When he was president. Of these united states. He did almost nothing. Except make himself rich.

He sowed dissent among the unsatisfied and content alike.

He pushed his nazis esque agenda onto the Country and allowed the worst of us to feel emboldened to come out into the light to shit their vile hatred upon the land.

He decreased Our standing among The World and damaged The United States ' reputation.

He fucked up our relationships with other countries.

He did damage to this Country and to The World that might never be repaired or fixed.

He stood idle , as a virus that killed millions ran rampant through the land .

As president ... he could have spoken to the whole land and all her people and encouraged everyone. He could have just let fauci ( who had decades of experience dealing with pandemic situations to handle the problem ) do his job.

But trump couldn't be bothered.

It s on his head that we all lost those 3 years.

Its on his head that a million people died from covid ( and some medical professionals say its more like 4million people. )

He didn't do anything . He washed his hands of it all.

He gave stupid advice on how to deal with the virus.

And even when he got covid ( and had the best medical care in t he whole world to help his old ass ) he did nothing but hinder the cdc s and fauci's ability to get things ameliorated.

His presidency was a grift. Like all the things he has ever done in his life ... his presidency was a joke and it was just there to make him money.

But. Of all the horrible and terrible things he has done... of all his crimes ...thee arguably worst is:

He stole classified documents and sold them to either the Russians ( or ) some other power. And got cia operatives killed .

Like the plot of a mission impossible movie...

This chucklefuctchucklefuck stole the Goddamn NOC list to our secret agents and gave it or sold it to a foreign power or foreign powers and got undercover c.i.a. agents killed.

This alone should put him in prison.

He betrayed this country on multiple levels . Multiple times .

He has committed treason against The USA and her people.

And he should receive the death penalty for what he has done.

How is he already not in prison.

And I can not forgive any one who voted for him or was for him.

And I do not know how repbz can still be for this guy.

If you are a repb at this point you are delusional.

Or stupid.

And that is what it comes down to.

For you to be on the side of the repb and or donald trump at this point :

You are either stupid . Very very very stupid.

Or you have some kind of severe brain damage or need for medication and should not be voting because your judgment is severely impaired.

Or

You are not just an asshole shitbrick.

You are not just some kind of creepie fuck who likes chaos ;

Your a legitimate bad person.

An actual evil fuck who wants to watch the World burn down .

Or at least you are an enemy of the usa and you want the country and its people to fall apart and suffer.

And it is unforgivable.

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 336: The U.A. Traitor Sends Their Regards

Previously on BnHA: All Might was all “hey kids, so I was thinking it might be a good idea to train a bit before this final battle that’s coming up soon.” Class 1-A was all, “wow All Might, what a fantastic idea, we never would have thought of that on our own, and also PLEASE TAKE NOTE OF OUR SARCASM.” Kacchan was all, “hey, I know I made that longass speech apologizing to Deku and expressing my sincere remorse and vowing to have his back no matter what, but I would appreciate if everyone could just sort of ignore all that and continue to respect my tough guy posturing.” AFO was all “okay guys, no need to panic, we’re just gonna sit tight until I hopefully get some of my quirks back, and in the meantime I’m gonna call in a favor from an old friend. :)” Hagakure was all, “U.A. Traitor Time? U.A. TRAITOR TIME.”

Today on BnHA: omg I don’t even want to put anything in the description here because everything in this chapter caught me COMPLETELY UNAWARES and I don’t want to accidentally ruin it for anyone else. but I mean. IF YOU KNOW YOU KNOW. lol where did I put that clown wig.

look at me reading this chapter while running on 3 hours of sleep after a long workday!! this is in no way a good idea lol, but the good news is the part of my brain that’s in charge of making smart decisions for my personal health has LONG since fallen asleep at the wheel, so we doin’ this! brace yourself for a shitload of typos and run-on sentences but WE ARE GO

(ETA: SLEEP-DEPRIVED ME WASN’T EVEN REMOTELY PREPARED FOR ANY OF THIS SHIT LMAO.)

also just as a side note, I shored up my spoiler containment field this week after everything that happened last time, so I am pleased to say that I have absolutely no idea what to expect today and haven’t even seen the popularity poll results yet. and speaking of said poll I don’t really have any predictions for that except for “BAKUGOU #1, DUH”

(ETA: AT LEAST SOME THINGS ARE STILL CERTAIN IN THESE CRAZY TIMES.)

oh my gosh it really is so great to see Deku happy

All Might too for that matter. look at them. so wholesome. how can we sustain this for them

(ETA: we really can’t, lol.)

AHHHHHH BROOOOOOOOO

HAHAHA OMG IT’S AMAZING AS ALWAYS

DON’T LET THE DOOR HIT YOU ON THE WAY OUT, SHINDOU!! JAPANESE FANDOM REDEMPTION ARC?? NATURE IS HEALING

RODYYYYYY. omg. I know I said I was gonna post my thoughts on movie 3 and I SWEAR I WILL... SOMEDAY, lol. I wrote down my initial impressions all haphazardly but I do have them, they’re not going anywhere. just a matter of me getting the time and spoons. anyways but in the meantime let me just tell you guys with full candidness that I went into the movie with the vague, unfounded concern that he was possibly going to annoy me. like, idk, all of the promo materials and interviews and trailers and such just didn’t really sell me on him at all. so I really wasn’t expecting much from him. but THAT SAID, it is my distinct pleasure to inform you all that I WAS WRONG, and he really is just as awesome as everyone said he was, and he completely won me over. EVERYTHING YOU HAVE HEARD IS TRUE. we respect and stan Rody in these streets

anyway and so IT IS GOOD TO SEE YOU BOY, and thank you so much for making the bad man go away. I SEE YOU TRYING TO PEEK AROUND THE CORNER, SHINDOU. YOU DON’T GET TO INVADE THE COLOR SPREAD WITH YOUR SMUG, BORING AURA THIS YEAR. GO ON, GET OUT OF HERE

moving on, SHINSOU!!! A.K.A. SHINDOU WITH TWO S’S -- NO, DAMMIT SHINDOU, I WASN’T CALLING YOU, I TOLD YOU TO LEAVE. anyway but look at Shinsou. here. in this panel. which is the most screentime he’s gotten since the JT arc. fandom is trying their hardest to send Horikoshi a message here lmao

PRESENT MIC IS HERE TO REMIND ME OF WHY I DIDN’T TRY TO PREDICT ANYTHING THIS YEAR LMAO. but you are a very welcome presence. you and your giant pigeon thing here. I know it’s a parrot lol but I mean, look at it

“HOW CAN I MAKE A SHEEP MANLY” Horikoshi sighs, deeply regretting his choice for Deku’s spirit animal. BUT LOOK AT YOU! YOU FOUND A WAY!

BAKUGOU WITH THE WOLF!! STANDING THERE ALL SOLEMN AND COOL LIKE JON FUCKING SNOW. YOU HAD SUCH A GREAT YEAR AND YOUR CONTINUED REIGN WAS NEVER IN DOUBT. ANYWAY BUT I’LL STOP SHOWERING YOU WITH PRAISE NOW BEFORE IT GOES TO YOUR HEAD. LOOK AT YOU POSITIONED SO CLOSE TO DEKU AND SLIGHTLY IN FRONT OF HIM ALL PROTECTIVELY AS BOTH OF YOU STAND VIGILANT OF THE APPROACHING THREAT. I LOVE YOU BOTH SO MUCH OH MY GOODNESS

SHOUTO AS A SNOW LEOPARD OMG. THE ICE CONNECTION WHILE KEEPING IT IN THE CAT FAMILY. I’M SO HERE FOR IT

IIDA’S SPIRIT ANIMAL BEING A FUCKING HORSE IS SENDING ME SO HARD FOR SOME REASON LMAO. I MEAN IT MAKES SENSE, HORSES ARE FAST I GET IT LOL, BUT IT’S JUST THAT EVERYONE ELSE SHOWED UP READY FOR A FIGHT, AND HERE YOU ARE ALL SET FOR THE WORLD EQUESTRIAN GAMES OMG. I’M SO HAPPY YOU MADE THE TOP TEN THIS YEAR AFTER YOUR BIG MOMENT

SOMEONE PLEASE INFORM KIRISHIMA THAT THERE ARE CERTAIN SITUATIONS IN WHICH IT IS ACCEPTABLE AND DARE I SAY EVEN PRUDENT TO ACTUALLY WEAR A SHIRT INTO BATTLE. EVEN THE KID WITH THE FIRE QUIRK IS DRESSED FOR THE SNOWY WEATHER, KIRI. LOVE THE TORTOISE THOUGH

SO GLAD TO SEE HAWKS HERE AFTER HE LOWKEY BECAME THE BEHIND-THE-SCENES NUMBER ONE HERO AND HAD THAT AMAZING FLASHBACK CHAPTER. WE’LL JUST PRETEND THE LAST TEN MONTHS OF HIM DOING NOTHING BUT IGNORING PHONE CALLS WHILE RIDING SHOTGUN WITH JEANIST DIDN’T HAPPEN LOL

LAST BUT NOT LEAST, AIZAWA AND HIS SPIRIT ANIMAL, THE GIANT FUCKING CAT. NO WONDER MIC’S PARROT LOOKS SO NERVOUS

“THANK FUCK I DON’T HAVE TO BOTHER TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WTF SHINDOU’S SPIRIT ANIMAL WOULD HAVE BEEN” I KNOW, RIGHT?? ANYWAY SORRY YOU GUYS, I PROMISE I’VE GOT IT ALL OUT OF MY SYSTEM NOW. NO MORE SHINDOU DISSES SO LONG AS HE PROMISES TO NEVER SHOW HIS STORE BRAND HANDSOME FACE EVER AGAIN AS LONG AS I LIVE. BUT ANYWAYS OKAY LET’S MOVE ON NOW

OH FUCK YES LOL HAVE AT IT KIDS

lol I have an essay I’ve been working on for like four fucking months about Bakugou and Deku and the current status of their relationship, and each week I tell myself that this is the week I finally finish and post it, and each week I continue to fail to do so. and one of these days Horikoshi is just gonna get to it before I do and then WHAT WILL BE THE POINT OF ALL THAT HARD WORK. anyway so maybe this chapter will be the kick in the pants I so desperately need lol. “BAKUGOU’S DEVELOPMENT!!” lol oh fuck

also he’s fighting without his gauntlets. KACCHAN I TOOK A SCREENCAP AND I’M POSTING IT IN MY RECAP. PROOF POSITIVE THAT YOU DON’T EVEN NEED THOSE STUPID THINGS. PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD AND EVERYONE LOL

(ETA: actually, given that he had a practical reason for wearing the winter costume, it wouldn’t surprise me if he wasn’t wearing the gauntlets on purpose so that he can do some conditioning/strength training, since he has to get used to the more powerful explosions. the gauntlets reduce his quirk’s impact on his arms, so taking them off is kind of like forcing himself to acclimate to the upgrade without any help. so yeah, I'm already bracing myself for him bringing them back later even though he really does look so much better without them sob.)

oh my gosh look at him bragging about how he figured out how to make little globs of sweat that he can detonate all at once together lol. we really didn’t need to know the disgusting insider details of your badass new move my sweet sweaty son

(ETA: this is actually so much exposition from him, though. he just couldn’t wait to tell Deku all about his awesome new move and how it works. “are you listening, nerd?? write that down in your shitty notebooks!!” Kacchan you know he actually will lol.)

omg. does this mean that his winter suit will officially be his go-to moving forward?? IS THIS THE DAY ALL MY DREAMS COME TRUE

“that’s nice Kacchan I’m gonna go pay attention to Todoroki now” HEY --

lol okay I scrolled down and actually, I get it

“is it just me or has he gotten way hotter” damn Deku keep it in your pants this is a children’s manga. really trying to make Kacchan jealous there huh

anyway so Shouto says his left side has finally caught up with his right, which, !! lol well okay then! nice of you to give us a heads up on that frankly huge development

wait, what does he mean make both halves into one. does he mean like internally, so he can regulate his temperature and use both quirks freely with no side effects? or is there some new special move he’s come up with that he’s teasing us with right now? except I thought we already had the combo ice+fire move; isn’t that what he used on Soda Sam way back when?

and just like we all expected, the transition into plot exposition is coming from none other than Kaminari fucking Denki lol

“that’s good stuff, Kami. and meanwhile I’ll sit here and play the audience stand-in” thank you Mineta

“AND GIGANTOMACHIA IS STILL SEDATED AND CONFINED” oh hey cool, I had been wondering about that. thank you very much for that update, Kamikoshi

lol and so is this where they’re keeping Machia then?

or is this their makeshift training area? it looks like it’s in the middle of nowhere though, so yeah I’m going with Secret Gigantomachia Prison

omg Kacchan was listening in. better that than watching his boyfriend continue to make googly eyes at his other boyfriend I guess

“listen up Dunce Face why don’t you just sit back and leave the exposition to the pros” damn Kacchan he was doing his best you know

omg now Momo’s chiming in. “couldn’t help but overhear you guys talking about smart things without me, so if you don’t mind...” by all means!!

I literally had to scroll back to the previous panel to see what Jirou was complaining about lol. I’ve officially become desensitized to Kacchan-speak. anyways but yes Momo, to your point of “btw the last time Tomura wasn’t at full power and he still kicked our asses if I recall” ayep

honestly, this is why I’ve been saying that your best bet is to just let him come to you guys though. you don’t know where to find him, but he does know where to find you. which would be bad news except that it means you get to decide the location of the final battle. he chooses the time, but you get to choose the place. so why not on your home turf where you know the terrain and can plan ahead, I say

“LET ME GET IN ON THIS STRATEGY TALK TOO I’M THE FUCKING MAIN CHARACTER YOU GUYS” our bad, Deku

um, but also,

the hell you are lol

HAHA

Iida shamed Deku into a lil black cloud. I have no idea what’s happening but I’m here for it

(ETA: did he smoosh Deku’s hair into his face with that headchop lol.)

man will you kids please stop being adorable so I can stop having to post every single panel of you all

I could have easily just summarized what Deku and Iida just said, but then I wouldn’t get to post this unbearably cute scene of Ochako blushing while Iida bigs her up with Tsuyu being all “yep it’s true you were a badass” and leaning in grinning like two inches away from her face

lmao Kaminari drinking his water and finishing up the speech as if he’s the one who made all of these excellent points

it’s tough being the protagonists, kids. always gotta keep your guard up and be ready for whatever the villains are scheming next. AND ON THAT NOTE...

holy shit. TRAITOR THINGGGGGGGS

-- OH MY GOD I SCROLLED DOWN AN INCH TOO FAR AND CAUGHT THE TOP OF THE FOLLOWING PAGE ALONG WITH THE REST OF THIS PAGE, OH FUCK

IN OTHER WORDS I SAW THE TOP OF THIS NEXT PANEL HERE, AND THE UNMISTAKEABLE FOREHEAD OF THE PERSON SHE’S TALKING TO AHHHHHHHHHH

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

HOLY SHIT??!

LOL WHAT

BROOOOOO

LOL FOREVER OMFG??! NO FUCKING WAY, I HAD IT BACKWARDS??

HAGAKURE OMFG

OMG. OMG. OMG??

OKAY LOL I NEED TO CALM THE FUCK DOWN HERE LMAO OR I’M JUST GONNA BE SCREAMING FOR THE REST OF THIS CHAPTER, AND POSSIBLY THE ENTIRE FUCKING SERIES LOL. LET’S SEE IF I CAN CHASE DOWN A COUPLE OF THESE THOUGHTS THAT ARE FLYING AROUND AT A THOUSAND MPH

SO I HAD IT BACKWARDS! HAGAKURE HOLY SHIT I STAKED MY ENTIRE REPUTATION ON YOU LOL. I REALLY TRULY THOUGHT AOYAMA WAS THE ONE WHO HAD CAUGHT ON TO YOU! BUT IT WAS THE OTHER WAY AROUND??

I’M SO GLAD I TURNED OFF COMMENT REPLIES AND MESSAGING THIS WEEK LMAO. ALSO THAT I APPARENTLY DIDN’T SPOIL ANYONE BY ACCIDENT AFTER ALL! REDEMPTION BY INCOMPETENCE LMAO

SEVERAL THINGS ABOUT THIS DO NOT MAKE SENSE TO ME YET, BUT THE HELL WITH IT, I’LL KEEP READING UNTIL THEY DO

SO WAS AFO THE ONE WHO GAVE HIM HIS BELT? IS HE DOING THIS SO AFO CAN HELP HIM GET HIS QUIRK UNDER CONTROL? OR HAS AFO BEEN THREATENING HIS FAMILY??

[EYES THE VOL. 2 OMAKE PAGES] SO WHY IS HAGAKURE’S QUIRK STILL SUCH A FUCKING SECRET THEN LMAO

AOYAMA YOU REALLY TURNED KATSUKI OVER TO THEM JUST LIKE THAT?? REAL TALK, YOU ALWAYS SEEMED LIKE A SWEET KID, AND IT’S CLEAR YOU’RE VERY SCARED AND DOING THIS ALL VERY MUCH AGAINST YOUR WILL, BUT I’M STILL GONNA NEED YOU TO HAVE A DAMN GOOD REASON FOR DOING THAT. ALTHOUGH, THANK YOU FOR KICKSTARTING HIS CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT ARC THOUGH

SO WAS HE ACTUALLY “HIDING” IN THE BUSHES FROM THE OTHER KIDS, AND IT WAS NEVER FROM DABI AT ALL???????

AND THAT MEANS HE MADE THE DECISION AT THE LAST SECOND TO SAVE TOKOYAMI FROM THEM??

AND HE CHOSE NOT TO TELL AFO THAT THE HEROES WERE PLANNING A RESCUE OP?? OR HE DID TELL THEM, AND EVERYONE WHO SAID THAT AFO KNEW THEY WERE COMING WAS ACTUALLY RIGHT AFTER ALL? BUT THAT STILL DOESN’T MAKE ANY SENSE TO ME THOUGH THAT AFO WOULD WILLINGLY ROLL OVER AND LET THE HEROES COME FUCK UP ALL HIS PLANS LIKE THAT. EH

LAST BUT NOT LEAST, NO WAY IS HAGAKURE JUST FIGURING ALL THIS OUT JUST NOW LMAO GIRL OMFG. WHAT ABOUT CHAPTER 12. AND THE SCHEDULE. AND USJ?? “I REALLY WAS WHERE TODOROKI WAS” GIRL WHAT. CLASSIC DITZY HAGAKURE AMIRITE

GIRL, WHAT

“WE’RE GOOD PARENTS WE SWEAR. WE CAME TO THE PERFECTLY SOUND CONCLUSION THAT WE WOULD RATHER SIGN OUR CHILD’S SOUL OVER TO THE PROVERBIAL DEVIL THAN HAVE HIM BE A QUIRKLESS FREAK” OH. MY. FUCKING. GOD. AOYAMA YOUR PARENTS ARE COMING IN HOT!! WATCH OUT ENJI YOUR PERENNIAL CROWN AS FATHER OF THE YEAR IS IN DANGER

“WHO COULD HAVE KNOWN THAT BUYING A BLACK MARKET QUIRK FROM THE KING OF THE UNDERWORLD WOULD HAVE UNFORESEEN REPERCUSSIONS??” OMFG YOU GUYS THAT’S BARELY EVEN AN EXAGGERATION FROM WHAT THEY ACTUALLY SAID SOB

“THE ONLY CRIME WE’RE GUILTY OF IS TRYING TO BE GOOD PARENTS! THAT, AND CONSPIRACY TO COMMIT KIDNAPPING AND ATTEMPTED MASS CHILD MURDER” UM?????????????????

OH BOO HOO LMAO

WELL I SURE FUCKING HOPE YOU GUYS HAD FUN WINNING ALL THE STUPID PRIZES AFTER PLAYING THE STUPIDEST OF GAMES SOB. PLUS, ALL OF THAT, AND HE DOESN’T EVEN GET A DECENT QUIRK?? HE GIVES HIM A FUCKING BELLY BUTTON THAT SHOOTS LASERS THAT HE NEEDS A SUPPORT ITEM TO EVEN CONTROL??

and what kind of message does it send your child that you were so desperate to fix his perceived defect that you struck a Faustian bargain with the WORLD’S MOST OBVIOUSLY EVIL MAN omfg. no wonder Aoyama tries so hard to prove to the world how beautiful and special and unique he is. “oops, we accidentally gave our gentle-hearted son massive self-esteem issues and a bargain bin quirk that doesn’t even fit him right, but at least we also inadvertently put his life in extreme danger and put him in a position where he would be forced to serve as an accessory to attempted pedicide!” fucking speechless

lol omfg. and so does this also mean Hagakure won’t be getting any character development?? so much for those hopes lol

Aoyama. buddy. I know how hard this all must’ve been on you, really. but I’m gonna need you to very carefully considering the following:

your parents are the actual worst

TomurAFO is planning on [checks notes] conquering and/or destroying the entire country/world

I’m just saying. just putting it out there, very gently, that maybe just maybe you should consider not helping the brutal tyrant who desperately wants to murder all your friends. particularly if the only thing you’re getting out of it in return is AFO’s Super Trustworthy Assurance that he’ll spare your hopelessly braindead parents over here

OH MY FUCKING GOD LMAO

I MEAN I WASN’T GONNA SAY ANYTHING, BUT THE THREE OF YOU WERE ACTUALLY BEING SO FUCKING LOUD THOUGH LOL. AOYAMA YUUGA WITH THE WORLD’S WORST-TIMED SOBBING CONFESSION OF ALL HIS PAST SINS LMAO. “ThIs Is A bLiNd SpOt In ThEiR sUrVeIlAnCe” SMDH

WOW OKAY, JUST GET IT ALL OUT IN THE OPEN THEN I GUESS!

JESUS CHRIST GIRL YOU DID THAT IN LIKE TWO SECONDS?? AND YOU EVEN HAD TIME TO EXPLAIN THE WHOLE THING TO HIM??

LMAO

THESE REALLY ARE THE ABSOLUTE DUMBEST CHARACTERS IN THE HISTORY OF THE SERIES HUH. TRULY UNENCUMBERED BY THE THOUGHT PROCESS

MAN I WAS ACTUALLY LIKE TWO SECONDS AWAY FROM FORMULATING A THEORY ABOUT HOW THAT’S NOT ACTUALLY DEKU (BECAUSE LOL), AND HOW HAGAKURE’S ACTUAL QUIRK IS LIGHT MANIPULATION LIKE EVERYONE SAYS, AND SHE CAN MAYBE USE IT TO FORM ILLUSIONS/MIRAGES AS WELL. BUT NOW HE’S HAVING FLASHBACKS TO STUFF SO IDK??

OR WAIT, NO, THESE ARE AOYAMA’S FLASHBACKS ACTUALLY! SO NEVER MIND MY NEW THEORY IS STILL ON. SURE HOPE IT PANS OUT BETTER THAN MY LAST HAGAKURE THEORY LOLLERSKATES

WELL, EITHER HAGAKURE IS REALLY GOOD AT IMITATING DEKU’S VOICE AND EXACT MANNER OF GUILT TRIP SPEECHMAKING, OR IT REALLY IS DEKU LOL

“I JUST SO HAPPENED TO BE IN THE AREA, AND THAT’S WHY!!” YEAH SURE BUDDY WHATEVER YOU SAY

“I’M SO SORRY DEKU BUT THE TRUTH IS I SUCK!!” LKSDJFLKAJDGLKG

WELRSKAJGLKGLMLKFDG

[FALLS TO MY KNEES] IT WAS ALL TRUE. THIS WHOLE TIME. THE CHEESE. THE SECRET MESSAGES. THE CREEPY ART EXHIBIT IMAGES. HE KILLED MUFASA!! WOULD YOU KINDLY!! I KNOW IT WAS YOU FREDO YOU BROKE MY HEART!!!!

AND THEY PLAYED ME LIKE A FOOL. AN ABSOLUTE BUFFOON. I’M NOT EVEN MAD THOUGH LOL. although I am just ever so slightly bummed that this means Hana really is dead (there never was much hope. just a fool’s hope), and Horikoshi’s track record with female character development remains very much intact lol. but, like, a sad lol

anyway but I guess that’s that, and instead of a badass lady traitor doing cool murdery shit we’ve got Aoyama and his fucking clown parents crying loudly in the woods while Hagakure uses her FAMED HAGAKURE SPEED to FETCH DEKU IN THE BLINK OF AN EYE to make things all awkward lol. “DEKU, THERE YOU ARE. SORRY TO INTERRUPT YOU IN THE MIDDLE OF DROOLING OVER TODOROKI, BUT COULD YOU COME WITH ME REAL QUICK BECAUSE AOYAMA IS THE FUCKING TRAITOR.” “WHAAAAAAT, NO WAY, I THOUGHT IT WAS YOU LOL. OKAY LET ME JUST TAKE A MOMENT TO FIX MY HAIR... THERE WE GO... OKAY LET’S DO THIS” go gettem Deku

[wnnbdarklord]

What I want people to understand is that when I say "I think Loki is acting OOC in the show" I don't just (or even *mostly*) mean "I don't think Loki would do that".

I mean "I don't think Loki would do that *in that way*".

Because sure, I can justify a scenario where Loki continues his "I'm gonna rule you" posturing after the Avengers. But I can't justify a scenario where Loki does it by jumping up on a rock and losing all sense of menace and subtlety.

Can I see a scenario where Loki gets apprehended by the TVA? Sure. But why does it happen 0.2 seconds after he stupidly approaches a force that's likely hostile? If you really want to show how badass the TVA is, make them work a little to capture Loki.

I don't believe Loki wouldn't immediately try to magic his way out of the TVA. I don't think he would be hostile about it, but to not even try to make an illusion that goes with them while he fucks off? Nah. You want Loki overwhelmed that his magic doesn't work? Hit him with that immediately.

While I can totally believe Loki would be feeling out of his depth and maybe even panicking about the TVA, I do not in a 100 000 years believe he would show his fear and confusion so openly. I don't believe he would broadcast his every thought and emotion, I absolutely don't think he would talk out loud to no one. He would stay quiet, observing.

I even believe he would ask "Do many people not know they're robots?" (or whatever the exact question was), but I don't think he would ask it like that, so earnestly, his insecurity and existential crisis plain for the world to see. Instead, it would've been sarcastic, all of his underlying emotions hidden under a controlled demeanor.

I could go on, but I think you get my point.

Mostly, where the fuck did all his subtlety go? Where did all his acting in control go? The quiet menace hiding a broken heart? Instead, we get...what we got. Someone unable to manipulate his way out a paper bag, who states his "plans" openly, who can't even act normally undercover for 2 seconds to get on a train, and so on.

This is why any justification of his actions falls flat on its face to me. Because it’s not about what he’s doing, it’s also about how he’s doing it. And he’s doing it like a clown.

Even if it is some grand long con, it sucks, because it's not being presented as one. It's being presented as though we should be taking the show's word for it. I, for one, refuse to.

For fucks' sake, Sylvie is acting more like Loki than Loki is. And oh look, she also gets his clothes and his competence and his sense of restraint. I'd like Loki to get them back, please. Because this isn't making me like Sylvie, it's just making me resent her. But mostly, I just resent Marvel for giving us even more shit when I was expecting post-Avengers Loki.

[queenofbaws]

Hello hello! I wanted to let you know that I had the brilliant idea to show my friends the fun but embarrassing ways of Social Suicide (RIP our dignities). Needless to say it’s not as amusing to play it than reading about it lol

Sooooo I come begging for at least but not exactly 6 sentences of a Social Suicide round for old times sake? Maybe between Josh, Conrad and Dylan? I live for the kind of chaos those clowns would bring to the table!… and want to read about other’s embarrassing experiences to forget about my own let’s be real here

Anyways I hope you’re doing well as we unwillingly keep living through historical events :D

at-least-but-not-exactly-six sentence sat(or)sunday!!!

---

“Now, look, I’m a man who enjoys a good game of truth-or-dare...”

“Yeah, you’ve got that look about you,” Dylan said, narrowing his eyes as he tilted his head first to one side, then to the other, acting like he was passing some sort of silent judgment on Conrad’s whole deal. Which, well, he was.

It was enough to get him to come up for air at least - a miracle in and of itself. “Thank...you...?” He waited to see if there would be any followup to that absolutely inscrutable statement, and when there wasn’t, turned back to Josh. “But what you do? Nah. Nah, that’s not truth-or-dare, man. Not even close. What you do’s more like...” He lifted his beer as he thought, taking a drink to buy himself some thinking time. “It’s more like...”

“Social Suicide,” Josh answered for him, tossing his phone onto the coffee table in much the same way a bettin’ man might place his chips. “Yeah, that’s kind of the point, my guy. It’s in the fucking name. Now are we playing, or are you gonna chicken out?”

Never one to pass up the opportunity for dramatics, Dylan set his phone down next to Josh’s despite not fully understanding why. “I mean, I’m down,” he said with a shrug. “I’m sort of completely incapable of experiencing shame in any kind of meaningful way, so like, why not, right?”

“A man after my own heart,” Josh grinned, sarcastically laying a hand flat on his own chest. “That just leaves you, Conman. Ante up.”

“Fuck no. Who do you think I am, Wash? This’ll shock you, but I do actually learn from my mistakes, so I’m gonna go ahead and pass on this one.”

There was nothing - nothing - about Josh’s posture that suggested he was even close to giving in. If anything, he leaned in that much closer towards Conrad, his eyebrows high and his eyes insistent. “Now I know you don’t mean that. I’ve known you for how long? And in all that time, I have seen you maybe, and I mean maybe, learn a lesson twice. The first was when you left those two-liters in your trunk overnight and they froze.”

Conrad scowled, not like he was upset or anything, but like he was recalling all the time, energy, and cold-hard cash that’d gone into getting his car reupholstered. Which was, of course, precisely what he was doing.

“The second was the night you drank that entire bottle of RumChata by yourself.”

“Oooh,” Dylan teased, steepling his fingers together as he chuckled. “Party boy, lookit you!”

That got Conrad to lift a hand, waving it furiously as he shook his head. “God don’t - urgh. I can’t even smell that shit anymore, don’t go saying the word, Christ, dude...” He visibly gagged, washing the memory down with another gulp of beer. “But you’re wrong, as usual. I have learned a third lesson.”

Josh slid his eyes to Dylan for a second there, blinking once, very, very slowly. “You hear that?” he asked. “Three.”

“I’m extremely impressed. That’s more than I’ve ever learned. Willingly, anyway.”

He ignored both of them wholesale, pointing an accusing finger Josh’s way. “Lesson three I learned the last time I played this fucking game with you and you sent a bunch of nudes to my grandma, you literal psychopath. Lesson. Learned.”

“Whoa whoa whoa, wait.” Dylan reeled back to get a better look at Josh, his eyebrows flying upwards. “I’m sorry, am I hearing this shit correctly? You sent your own dick pics to Justin Timberlake’s granny?”

“Justi - hey, screw you, man. JT’s got nothing on me.”

“Alas, Ives, you are hearing incorrectly.” Josh shook his head, then pushed himself off the couch to join Dylan on the floor, splaying his legs out so they’d cross over Conrad’s ankles, specifically. “I sent Conrad’s nudes to his grandma. Such are the risks of the game.”

It took a second for that one to process. When it did, he rocked backwards as though Josh had grabbed him by the shoulders and shaken him. “Okay. Okay, see, now I’m like, doubly down to play this game,” Dylan grinned. “This is gonna be hilarious.”

“No it’s not,” Conrad groaned. “It’s not hilarious at all! It’s awful, it sucks, and it’s a literal exercise in sadism.”

“I’ve told you before, man,” Josh smirked. “You shouldn’t have all those nudes on your phone anyway. It’s trashy.”

“Your mom sure seems to like them.”

Dylan swiveled around towards Conrad. “Okay, so is there anyone besides me who hasn’t seen your nudes? Because I’m starting to get, like, serious FOMO here.”

There was silence as Conrad glared between the two of them, his eyes narrowed and the lip of his beer bottle pressed to his chin. His shoulders rose with a single monstrous breath, and then he let it out in a roar of a groan, slamming his bottle down before reaching into his pocket and throwing his phone into the pile. “Fine,” he snapped. “Fine. Know what? It’s fine. I’ll play your stupid game, Wash, but I’m not going easy on you. You’re going to rue the fucking day you were born by the time I’m done with you.”

“Joke’s on him,” Josh muttered, leaning in towards Dylan and muttering through the side of his mouth despite being plenty loud enough for Conrad to hear. “I do that shit every day.”

“You and me both, man,” Dylan sighed, shaking his head. “You and me both. Now who’s going first? Because the promise of complete and utter social humiliation sort of has me salivating over here.”

Conrad rolled his eyes up to the ceiling as he came to terms with his inevitable demise. “Lesson four’s a’comin’,” he groaned. “I feel that shit in my bones.”

[secondhand-trash]

Haikyuu boyfriends and how well they do as your personal photographer

Bless their souls but it amazes you how they manage to look at the screen and think “yeah that’s seems alright ”

Ushijima — he genuinely thinks you look good in every pic and that’s sweet but that’s exactly where the issue is. The way he takes a pic from a angle that looks like your legs were cut in half length wise and your eyes were like a dead fish but still thinks you look gorgeous stunning beautiful meant you would not get a pretty picture from the regular public’s standard anytime sooner.

Kageyama — his idea of what “help me take a picture” means is way more simple than what you had meant for it to be. You stand there, he presses the button, that should be it. He doesn’t get why people spend so much time looking for angles, or fixing exposures. It’s a picture????? It goes “click” and that’s it right??? He spends no time looking for a nice angle or even wait for you to pose, resulting in a lot of pics that are out of focused😌

Iwaizumi — he is an “awkwardly flex and puff his chest out while locking his jaw” type of guy himself, he tries but he really has no idea what is flattering and what is not. The grid references confuses him and he gets even more tensed when you try to give him instructions. Somehow always manages to take the picture when you’re blinking or making some sort of weird faces because you felt something on your face.

Not a natural, but they’ll go the extra mile just so you can have your pretty pics for insta

Nishinoya — he goes the extreme for your pics. If you ask him to crouch down to get your best angle, you bet he is gonna get so low on the ground until his arms are near touching the concrete just to give you that long✨leg✨effect✨. If you are an awkward poser or felt uncomfortable when you pose, he’s gonna go out of his way to run around behind to camera to catch your attention so you can have the most natural posture and the best smile.

Tanaka — he belonged to the last category when he was just starting out but then he sees the way you just didn’t post because you thought you didn’t look nice in any of the pics and he was just like “nah fuck that I’m gonna get good at this for your feed”. Follows so many of those “photo hacks”/“posing tips” accounts just so he can help you take nicer pics, now he’s a pro👏🏼

Bokuto — he has no idea what the hell he’s sounds and what he’s supposed to do but he has hella patience when it comes to doing things for you. As long as you look like you’re enjoying yourself and he seems like he’s doing good, he’s all game for taking 1528126826 pictures of you in the same spot with the same pose just to get that (1) perfect picture.

Mediocre photographer, editing KING

Suna — he gets very familiar with the photoshop settings from trying to make memes and stickers packs to clown the twins. The absolute GOD in terms of helping you remove people that got into your frame and making it look seamless. Probably has vsco and those camera apps that tries to make your pics look like they are taken with Polaroids on his phone.

Miya (Atsumu) — he learnt his lesson the hard way after getting clowned by his brother (and later vball teammates) for having wiggly bricks and crooked fences at the back of his pics because he tried to make his waist look smaller and legs longer🥲if you took a pic where you look really hot but “wow my hair doesn’t look fluffy enough” he can probably give you a free perm just by using facetune.

Kozume — he just... he just knows what he’s doing. He has very little patience during the photo taking process, but if you told him there’s a pic you like but you didn’t like this or that he would silently fix all those things and send it back to your without you even asking him to.

Today’s mvp, you should pay them just for how nice your feed got

Oikawa — he seems like the annoying type when he’s the one asking people to take his pics so in returns, he also knows what to do to get the best outcome. He knows all the tricks, all the hacks, the best pose that goes best according to what you want people to pay attention to. He probably has his pick of Instagram filters, one of them is probably that one with the sparkly effect. (But it comes with a cost because the amount of effort he put in for you, he expects you to do the same for him😌)

Akaashi — he just seems like he knows his shit LMAO he probably won’t make you look like an Instagram model but you’re gonna get very aesthetic artsy pics. Super good at finding hidden locations in places where everyone is crowding around that (1) visually pleasing spot and you couldn’t get pictures there without a seat of people at the back. He makes you look like a French art film star and I just think that sounds pretty nice😌

Yachi — not an hq boyfriend, she’s an hq girlfriend BUT THIS GIRL KNOWS WHAT SHES DOING. She works with graphic design right so she knows what proportions and what props to use to get the most balanced structure. She’s gonna make you your own magazine cover if you ask her to. She has a lot of experience with trying to make herself look taller in pics so if that’s what you want, she can make your legs look at least a good several inches longer 😌

[stxleslyds]

Red Hood and the lost art of telling Joker to shup up.  

Okay, I know that I talked about Jason and Joker in a recent post but this is something different, I promise.

I really want to talk about how different Jason has been written since UtRH when it comes to him confronting Joker. Jason hasn’t been put in that position a lot but the times that he has, he lets Joker talk for far too long and actually pays attention to whatever he has to say.

The Jason vs Joker thing is basic in on itself and letting Joker talk isn’t exactly the problem here, the real problem is Jason letting Joker’s thoughts shape his future thoughts and decisions, I do understand that that’s exactly what writers want though, they want to build the problematic of: “Jason is just like Joker and the fact that he uses the name Red Hood only proves that Joker made who Jason is now”.

But the thing is that THAT problem is overdone at this point and the only time it worked was the first time it was brought up and it worked because Jason shut the Joker down.

Let’s see all the times (that I remember) the Joker and Jason have had a little chat and/or the times Joker’s words actually influence Jason’s thinking and decision making.

 Under the Red Hood – Batman (1940) #649

This is the first real confrontation we get to see between Jason and Joker after Jason’s death and it is beautiful. It's absolutely amazingly written, Joker goes on and on forever about how he killed Jason about how Jason is just as bad as him but that he is also just like Batman because he hasn’t killed him yet.

“You let me live after everything I did, you couldn’t pop my balloon. You just couldn’t. The apple doesn’t tumble too far from the paterfamilias. You are just like daddy-kins”

Jason lets him talk, yes. But he absolutely destroys Joker with what he tells him next.

“You couldn’t be more wrong about me. If right were a country on earth you’d be circling on the edge of the milky way. Yeah, I let you live but like always, every damned minute of your addled, posturing, psychopathic life, you think this is about you. You’re a worm. I’ve pitched you on a hook and dropped you into the brine. And I will beat the hell out of you Pagliacci because it was too much fun not to.”

“Listen to me Joker, I’m not you. I´m nothing like you. I know what I do and I know why I do it. You, you are, clinically speaking, a whack-job. But I know a secret, a good one.”

“You are not nearly as crazy as you would like us all to believe or even as crazy as you would like to believe. It just makes it easier to justify every sick monstrous thing you’ve ever done when you play the part of the mad clown. You are crazy, bubba, but you ain’t that crazy. Look at that. I wiped a smile off of Joker’s face. I have been waiting a long time for that.”

Everything about this is perfect, Jason gives Joker no room to mess with him. Whatever the Joker had planned on saying he had to eat because Jason wasn’t playing games and he was ready for any kind of lie the Joker had ready to tell. This is Jason Todd. He won’t let the Joker get under his skin because he knows the Joker and he, also, knows better. 

Red Hood and the Outlaws (2011) #15

Here Jason comes across Joker during the “Death of the Family” event. In this issue the Joker has information about all of the members of the “Batfamily” and he uses that to mess around with each one of them, in Jason’s case he insinuates that he was present in very specific moments of his life when Jason’s father got shot, when his mother overdosed and when he was on his own before joining Batman.

Jason doesn’t quite believe that Joker was there but as the reader, we can see this sort of sense of doubt in Jason. He hesitates a few times before resolving that the Joker is playing with him.

But as far as this issue goes let’s just say that what the Joker says doesn’t get to Jason, this changes though in the issue that follows up this story.

Teen Titans (2011) #16

This is where that story continues and where Jason starts to buy the story that Joker is selling.

Joker convinces Jason that he has his father and Tim’s father and that the only way for Jason (or Tim) to save their dads is by killing the other (Jason or Tim). Tim doesn’t believe it but Jason is ready to shoot Tim almost immediately.

However, Jason changes his mind about killing Tim just as Tim comes up with a plan for them to not actually have to kill each other. Here is where Lobdell’s writing shows all of its flaws, Lobdell is so desperate to show that Jason and Tim are besties that he forgets that Jason had no reason to stop trying to kill Tim to save his shit father because it is later revealed that Jason truly believed that Joker had found his father and had him captive. It wasn’t until Tim explained his thought process as to why those men weren’t their dads that Jason just goes “you realize, of course, the only reason I didn’t kill you right off is that I knew your big brain will figure out some way out of this” HA, nice save Lobdell but I see right through your bullshit.

Jason bought what the Joker was selling and that is the beginning of Jason’s downgrade when it comes to not playing Joker’s games.

Red Hood and the Outlaws (2011) #17

Well, in this issue Lobdell goes back to Jason kinda not believing what Joker told him, and Jason asks Bruce of all people if he thinks the Joker truly “made him or not”. Bruce says that he doesn’t believe that and that he didn’t have anything to do with the man that Jason has become either. For some reason, Jason is actually happy with what Bruce said and for a couple of moments, Jason goes back to being sure that the Joker knows nothing and that he is his own man.

It doesn’t last long though. At the very end of the issue, the trap that Joker had set up in Jason’s helmet triggers and Jason gets his face fucked up with acid or something.

But that’s not all because a hologram of Joker has something to say: “you were supposed to be my masterpiece from start to finish. But you were too stubborn to stay dead. So here is what we are going to do… You’re so determined to be your own man? Fine, let’s start with a clean slate”.

Basically, the Joker insinuates once more that he had something to do with who Jason was supposed to become and that Jason isn’t truly “his own man”, This is all a setup for a very dense storyline that will be continued in this run later.

Red Hood and the Outlaws (2011) #18

In this issue, Jason is in a coma after he is dosed with that gas in the previous issue. The Joker isn’t really present in this issue but he does make an appearance as part of Jason’s “nightmare” while he is unconscious.

That’s not all though, Jason has an illusion of Ducra (someone that he appreciates a lot), telling him that “after you left the All-Castle after you went back to the world you continued to let your life be defined by the actions of that man. You became a killer, lashing out at people who may or may not have deserved it. Eventually, you will hurt all those you have cared for. In that way, how are you any different from the Joker?”.

In this statement, there is a lot of wrongs that can come from two places, either bad writing on Lobdell’s part or just Ducra telling lies as a plot point.

“Let your life be defined by the actions of that man” is a sentence that horribly simplifies Jason’s thinking during the events of UtRH, because while he did resent the Joker, his real problem was with Bruce who had not avenged his death by killing the Joker himself. Also, Jason was doing other things back then, like being a pain in the ass for Black Mask and disrupting the drug trade in Gotham as well as trying to control the drug dealing to children. So that little sentence is just a gross misinterpretation of the true events which means that Ducra was wrong, and “she” continues to be wrong when she says that there might be no difference between Jason and Joker.

Luckily Jason thinks the same because he tells “Ducra”: “…don’t you dare compare me to that monster Ducra. I am nothing like the Joker! Nothing!”

Once again please don’t be fooled by Jason’s thinking because in the next issue it turns around really fast and really bad.

Red Hood and the Outlaws (2011) #19

Just a heads up this issue has a change of writer, Lobdell isn’t writing this arc, the writer that gives us this hellish story arc is James Tynion IV.

All that talk about Jason not being affected or not believing what the Joker told him is yeeted out of the window and it’s not a fun ride.

In this issue, Roy and Kory find a Jason that doesn’t know who they are or who he, himself, is. This is because S’aru that little floaty little shit took his memories away after Jason asked him to do so, well Jason asked S’aru to erase every memory that darkness has touched (Joker) and he does that. But him doing that is apparently erasing everything which, holy shit, how messed up is that?

But let’s take a look at what Jason says before he gets his memories taken away: “Not only did the Joker almost take my face, but he tells me he might have manipulated my entire life from the beginning! Even the good is tainted by him now. I can’t do it anymore. I can’t have that kind of doubt. If you take it away, I can go on living. I can keep fighting”. So, yeah that was a pretty emo speech. But the thing here is that if Jason is asking this dude to erase every memory that has been tainted by the Joker and he erases all of them then we might be facing one of two situations, either Joker has been messing up with Jason’s life from the beginning or S’aru is just a little bitch.

We will later find out in #20 that S’aru and Ducra planned the whole thing, meaning that they took all of his memories for ulterior motives not because the Joker had actually tainted all of them.

For many issues Jason has no memories and now that I am revisiting these issues, I now remember the twisted and completely insane plot they came up with for the “League of Assassins” and Jason being the “Chosen One”, everything was happening in this run, my god, it's like they wanted Jason to be the center of every single trope in writing history.

It’s in issue #26 that Jason asks for his memories back but the Joker having tainted his memories or not isn’t important anymore to anyone, including the writer (because he is too focused on telling this messy story), Jason (because he has enough problems at the moment) and the reader (because this book makes zero sense and it changes the story and motivations every single issue).

But there is another truth to be revealed in the next issue.

Red Hood and the Outlaws (2011) #27

Jason has planned along Ducra and S’aru to give up all of his memories to be cleansed so he could defeat Ra’s Al Ghul. But (there is always a but) Ducra says this: “Your greatest enemy returned and nearly took your face away from you. And in the process, shook your sense of identity to the core” “The final battle here will take place in the Well of Sins, and with all the doubt and fear clouding your mind, it would eat you whole”.

So yeah, now we have confirmation from Ducra that Jason had indeed let what the Joker told him cloud his sense of self and made him doubt who he was and if he really was in control.

All that back and forth for these many issues just to say, yes, Jason let Joker’s words affect him.

So here it is, let Joker get in Jason’s head to build the plot of a story, fantastic, the story was a mess because it had so much information, the mischaracterizations of Roy and Kory were at their maximum potential, and in this particular story arc not only are the events of Red Hood: The Lost Days officially erased from Jason’s canon but something quite out there is added to Jason’s canon from before he was even Robin (that’s a whole different story that I won’t be talking about here).

What an insane ride this arc was. Definitely not the kind of story I enjoy in a Red Hood book but that’s just my preference.

*This whole arc was written by James Tynion IV.

Red Hood/Arsenal #11

Joker is dead during the events of this run but the person who has something to say to Jason about how the Joker made the person that he is now is Duela Dent (“Joker’s daughter”, she isn’t his daughter she just found Joker’s face somewhere and she puts it on and “becomes” crazy, she is an incredibly weird character).

She says this, “You’re a lot like dad in that way” to which Jason says “He is not my father. He’s not even your father” but Duela continues by saying. “You’re kidding yourself if you genuinely believe that. Yeah, he took your life but look what you got in its place, you ingrate. You got your freedom. You were reborn.” 

Jason doesn’t fall for it or anything of the sort but once again writers are bringing up the Joker as the maker of the Red Hood and “suggesting” that what Jason has been doing and who he has become is all thanks to Joker. The idea of Jason having no free will is still present in this narrative, even when Jason doesn’t believe it.

Red Hood/Arsenal #12

I talked too soon because in this issue Jason is having some weird thoughts.

“Funny, isn’t it, so easy to call Duela “crazy” because she wears a dead man’s face. Because isn’t that what I’m doing? Before he was the Joker, he was the Red Hood. So maybe the line between men and the Joker’s daughter is a lot thinner than I’d like to admit.”

Here he is comparing himself to Duela and to the Joker to an extent, writers often bring up the fact that Jason uses the code name that his killer once had and they have people or Jason himself questioning why he uses that name.

Personally, I don’t think there is much to build from it (at least not from the perspective of Lost Days and UtRH), it was just a joke, a morbid one if you will. He wears the mantle of the person that destroys Gotham and fills its people with fear while he is trying to control the city’s drug trade and trying to keep the people safe in his own way. And the way he wanted to do it is almost the complete opposite of the way that Batman does things.

I just think that he is being ironic and acidic about the whole thing. He has obviously moved on from the fact that Joker killed him but he has issues with the fact that Batman has yet another child working with him while the Joker is still alive. And Jason really wanted to make Bruce suffer, so him taking the name and a similar appearance to how the joker used to look is also done to get a reaction from Bruce.

I really don’t think there is any sort of connection to make between Jason and Joker beyond that, much like there is no connection between the name Nightwing and the Court of Owls. Even though Lincoln March tried to convince Dick Grayson that he chose the name Nightwing because Owls fly at night and that meant that he was supposed to become a Talon and all that Dick still didn’t believe it because he knew why he chose that name and no one can twist his reason.

Red Hood and the Outlaws (2016) #10

Finally, I can stop re-reading New 52 books, I don’t enjoy it but I have to do it if I want to talk/complain about stuff.

This one is a little different because while Jason does talk with the Joker, the Joker isn’t really there he is just part of Jason’s imagination just like the Robin Jason that he is also seeing.

In this story, Jason is helping Artemis discover who she is but he gets captured in Qurac, yup that place, and worst of all from where he is being held, he can see the place where he died. All of that is helping Jason have some very vivid memories/illusions. He does actively hold a conversation with the imaginary Joker and Robin Jason though, and he is also having a lot of thoughts that let us know how the Joker affects Jason.

“This is why it was stupid of me to come back to Qurac. Even to help Artemis, even if I thought I could handle it. Physically, I am alone, but in my head? I’m drowning in memories of the worst day of what was my very short life. The day I was murdered.”

That’s what Jason is thinking but what I write next is what Jason’s saying as he talks to the imaginary Joker.

“Not interested in replaying this over again, like I have every night of my life since it happened Joker”

So, we are told that Jason thinks about that day very often, the Joker might not be involved much in Jason’s books but he definitely has a bigger role inside of Jason’s head. They chat for a bit up until Jason decides to “kill” the Joker, he knows, of course, that it is not real but it does give him satisfaction. (If only they would have let Jason actually kill the clown for real, or at the very least chase him just to show the reader that Jason does actually want to finish the job since the Bat won’t do it himself).

Having said all that, Joker’s imaginary death doesn’t last long because Jason is trapped in his mind and the Joker is basically functioning on a loop inside of it.

That is where the problem lies in this issue because Jason is letting us know that he is still heavily influenced by what happened that day and that he hasn’t been able to walk away from it. But once more that’s not the worst thing, because all of these thoughts have led Jason to think that he (in the present and as a fifteen-year-old) is the one to blame for having ended up dead. Yeah, it is messed up.

This is what Jason says to imaginary Robin Jason, “He is never going to die, Jason. Not here. Not in my mind, not if at some point I don’t stand up and walk away from my memories. From you.”

This is a major downgrade, from the Jason that we had in UtRH because that Jason had moved on from the fact that he had been killed what he was looking for was for Batman to avenge his death. He had other things in mind as well, like I said before in this post Jason had a lot of things going on, killing Joker wasn’t his only plan.

And this situation (written by Lobdell) is also very different from what was going on in New 52 where Jason being influenced by the Joker was used to build a plot. This is just a writer letting us know that this “new version” of Jason hasn’t worked out his problems when it comes to his death and his killer. That means that we are going backward.

After he realizes that he was unconscious all that time and that he was being tortured he does get his shit together in order to get out of captivity and go help Artemis.

The Joker and that whole thing that happened in his mind aren’t mentioned again, it was just for the reader to know that Rebirth Jason has unsolved issues with his death.

Batman: Three Jokers #1

Oh yes, here we are, we have arrived to that dreaded book, awful writing gorgeous art. In this book, the “Joker made Jason as he is now” trope is at its full potential; Johns drives this hellish truck of a book at full speed into our homes and then ends it by giving us one of the worst takes on Jason Todd’s characterization ever.

But first, let’s talk about the Joker and Jason interaction in the first issue. As Jason and Barbara are left alone with the Joker that they came across moments ago the Joker begins talking because that’s what he does.

He says this, “I’m the loop-de-loop, the hamster-wheel-of-doom. The cycle of pain each one of you is trapped in. Take “Red Hood” here, for example. Have you ever wondered why he uses my former moniker? Who in their right mind would take on the identity of their killer? Am I right?”

He is obviously being a little shit on purpose and is waiting to see if somebody will take the bait. Jason is the first to talk and he says this: “I took it because I’m owning what you did to me. You made me into this. I will be your destruction”.

Congratulations Jason, you took the bait, and now Barbara will fight with you over it.

Jason raises his gun to “break the cycle” and Barbara is like “please don’t do it” and boy is Joker having the time of his life! Both of these idiots are playing his game, Johns really did both Jason and Barbara dirty with this.

Here is where THE problem with letting the Joker talk is. This Joker got under Jason’s skin in seconds and Barbara did nothing while it happened.

This is what the Joker had to say. “Let’s look at the facts here bat-people. I bashed this boy’s skull in. I killed this Robin” to which Jason says “You didn’t kill me, you only made me stronger” which is weird because the Joker did kill him so I don’t know what kinda comeback that was supposed to be but Joker wasn’t done because he continues by saying “Yes, you crawled from the shallow grave I left you in. You lived on to fight another day. Hurrah! You survived because of your tenacity! Or maybe… maybe I beat you to a bloody mess… I took you right to the edge… because I wanted to leave you alive.”

Great that’s where the clown is going, just fantastic, more of the “I made you” but that’s not all because the Joker tells Jason that him having hurt Jason wasn’t because he didn’t like Jason, it was all about Batman, Jason doesn’t matter.

But that’s not the worse thing that was written in this awful book, Geoff Johns seems to have felt that the trauma that Jason went through in the original “Death in the Family” story wasn’t enough because he decided to add something new.

That’s why the Joker says this next, “Do you recall what you said to me while I was breaking your head in with that crowbar? As your blood streamed into your eyes and your skull cracked? Because I cherish those words. I’ll always cherish them. ‘Please stop! Please! If you let me live, I’ll do anything you say. I’ll be your Robin’” “And look at you now my little “Red Hood” shooting up people and making Batman’s life miserable! You are my Robin!”

What a nightmare Johns decided to put Jason and Jason Nation through huh? I hate this, this is the worst thing that has ever been written in a Jason Todd story (although I can say that about many things that were written in this three-issue book).

Jason kills the Joker after he says all that, Barbara does (for some reason) try to stop him from doing it but luckily, she can’t stop Jason.

But here is the thing, Jason killing the Joker doesn’t make me feel as satisfied as I would have liked, and it doesn’t feel that way because Jason let Joker talk for far too long and what Joker said ended up getting in Jason’s head and messing with him.

Batman: Three Jokers #2

Yeah, there is no rest for us, Jason Nation, in this issue Jason goes looking for another Joker to kill and he finds one but he gets captured. Johns really had to get Jason naked for Joker to torture him mentally and physically? Johns is, himself, a major red flag but that’s not what I am here to talk about.

In this issue the Joker that captures Jason has the same things to say as the other one, DC writers really have no imagination when it comes to building conflict between Joker and Jason, huh?

Anyway, Joker says this, “tell me something. Why would you put on that helmet and call yourself Red Hood after what we did?” Jason of course replies “Come on, is every one of you copycats gonna ask me the same thing? It’s a joke” the answer isn’t enough for Joker (the two of them that are here with Jason) so he continues talking. “A joke? We left you with brain damage and permanent nerve pain. Physical and emotional trauma so severe that the only relief you ever find is when you inflict pain on others. You and me, boy, we’re more alike than you’d care to admit. But you know that already. You nearly died and you blame the Batman. You hate him for it. Me too. You hate him most of all don’t you?”

Now, here is the thing, that whole thing is bullshit, none of it makes sense. From Jason having permanent nerve pain to Jason hating Batman the most, everything is a lie. And my confusion here is that I don’t know if I have to feel like Joker is doing it on purpose to be a little bitch or if Geoff Johns was on crack when he wrote this and he had actually never heard of Jason Todd in his life before.

The whole thing is a mess, it feels like he is writing Jason from an origin and story that we never read. I don’t know how to explain it, but the whole thing feels cheap, it’s a cheap trope and it’s a cheap take on who Jason Todd is, was, and will be.

The nightmare doesn’t end Jason Nation because these two Jokers have something else in mind, you see, if they said that they made the Red Hood when they killed Jason the first time, maybe if they kill him this time then he could possibly come back as the Joker. Yeah, this book did nothing for Jason.

Let’s make something clear, Jason does NOT hate Batman/Bruce for not being able to save him, he hates the fact that Batman/Bruce didn’t kill the Joker to avenge him. That simple thing doesn’t exist in Three Jokers and that’s why things like the ones that happen next are allowed to happen in this story.

Bruce and Barbara find Jason and when Bruce asks if he is okay Jason just goes berserk, he says: “Am I all right? What do you think Bruce?! You did this to me. You put me on this path. And I do hate you for it. For leaving me in the dirt. Replacing me one Robin after another without a thought.”

This, everybody is what you get when you mix bad writing with Jason being mentally manipulated by the Joker.

It's a shame that Jason is being treated this way at this point in time, in a book that came out in 2020 when Jason was able to shut the clown up with a knife and a couple of words back in 2005. What a downgrade.

At the end of this issue, Jason is safe and recovering but he still is in the same mindset, he says, “What the Joker said about how I’ve been on the path to being like them for years… they are not wrong. I don’t want to be like them though. I really don’t.”

It’s like a never-ending wheel of pain with this book. Jason is talking to Barbara when he says that and he is trying to look for comfort in her. And here is where the Jason/Barbara subplot begins and I only bring this up because something that happens in the next issue is based on the kiss that Barbara gave Jason but then was like “that doesn’t mean anything, I was just trying to comfort you”. Johns shouldn’t be allowed to write Barbara and Jason ever again.

Batman: Three Jokers #3

It’s in this issue that we find out the big subplot that Johns has prepared for Jason, are you ready for it? Yup, Jason should stop being the Red Hood because if he keeps it up, he will eventually become the Joker.

I know, I know! Jason would never stop being Red Hood, he is not on a path to become the Joker, that’s crazy! Jason’s Red Hood is a character on its own and he is amazing and just because he has different morals from Batman doesn’t mean that he is a bad guy! Right?...

“I’ll give up being Red Hood for us. I can be something else. Or I can be just Jason.”

To this day I cannot believe that those words supposedly were written by Jason Todd to Barbara Gordon after Barbara rejected him three times. The level of “what the fuck is this” is incredibly high with this one…

This whole book was a mess and I am so glad that it didn’t last longer.

Anyway, that’s it. In conclusion, Jason didn’t let the Joker get under his skin the first time they interacted after he came back from the dead but later when DC decided that UtRH was just too good of a book they came up with stories where Joker does get under Jason’s skin and Jason becomes convinced that he has no free will (or at the very least he doubts his free will) when it comes to him becoming his own man.

As I have said before, that for Jason Todd is a major downgrade. And it's one of the many things that hurts Jason’s characterization in current comics.

[athys-obelia]

summary: the non dysfunctional!imperial family au hcs no one asked for 😳👉👈

character/s: anastacius de alger obelia, claude de alger obelia, athanasia de alger obelia, jennette de alger obelia

here's part 2 :)

let’s set our stage, shall we?

first of all claude n anastacius’ dad is dead coz we don’t like him at all ew

so ana is the emperor, and claude is his heir presumptive (aka he’s got the strongest claim to the throne rn, but this can be changed by the birth of someone who has a stronger one - ie, anastacius’ child who would be the heir apparent) also bc “i know my mom and i gave u lots of childhood trauma that you prlly won’t be recovering from because therapists aren’t a thing here but here’s a crown you might get to make it better”

claude’s in a position where after the birth of ana’s kid/direct descendant, he’s gonna be given a duchy that athy should inherit after him while still retaining the title of prince

but after hearing of diana’s pregnancy, ana tells her and claude he doesn’t really plan on having children and wants to make their future kid his successor

he basically reserves a spot for their child in the directory and rather than announcing anything publically, anastacius names her athanasia after the sex is confirmed

then this mf obviously pulls a clown move and gets penelope pregnant and complicates things, ultimately naming her jennette, finding the name fitting - ‘god is gracious’

and really, what could be more evidence of god’s grace than the child he’s now fathering, when he thought his legacy would be ending with him?

anyways!!!

so since athy and jennette are born near the beginning of ana’s reign, both claude and anastacius are wayyy too busy trying to bring back the empire from the literal brink of bankruptcy and a possible war to really spend time w their kids

it’s alright, though!! lily is hired as athy’s nanny, while jennette gets kiel’s mom as hers

they all still live together, though obviously the main palace is for ana + jennette while claude + athy are in a separate one

this 'separate one’ is ruby palace after ana dismisses the concubines and he definitely 100% did this on purpose, and whenever he’s summoning claude he’s such a shit about it and goes about it the way you’d summon a deadass concubine

on a separate note, it’s surprisingly claude who visits athy first - he’s seen her here and there with lily but hasn’t ever had the chance to spend time w her. but now it’s almost been a year since athy’s birth (or diana’s death), her first birthday is fast approaching, and he is drunk

lily is a reallyyyy light sleeper and enters the nursery upon hearing someone inside

she doesn’t expect to see the prince standing above his daughter’s crib, a strand of her golden hair between his fingers as he just…stares at her

she approaches quietly, curtsying in greeting - he’s too absorbed to notice, and after a few minutes of silence lilian tells him, “babies can get lonely too, your highness.”

he glances at her then, confused. “how?” he really can’t understand how this girl, who can’t even speak yet comprehend something like loneliness

“princess athanasia is very responsive to her surroundings, much more than children her age usually are,” lily says, “and i like to believe children are able to tell when their parents are with them.”

he scoffs - what a foolish thought. still, claude sits by her bedside, and before he can register it, he’s taken over by sleep

the next night, claude makes his way towards the nursery and stiffly asks if athy could sleep beside him for the night - it’s fairly late, but lilian allows it

he’s gone to the main palace too early the next morning for athy to be awake, but she spent about two minutes tops worrying about the strange surroundings, saw the shiny chandelier and fancy bed and decided yes, she doesn’t mind this kidnapping

this becomes somewhat of a regular occurrence soon enough, and sometime that week she wakes up in the middle of the night with her nose pressed into something soft and literally falls off the huge ass bed at the realisation that this something soft is actually her papa’s hair (you just know that hair smells great i mean uh-)

this mans wakes up and peeks at her on the ground, reaches out to grab her from the front of her nightdress (he swears it’s exactly how he’s seen lilian do it) and plops her back onto the bed

she backs up OBVIOUSLY, you don’t just wake up with a random ass man in your bed and just vibe together?? lee jihye is dying but he glares at her for disturbing his sleep and athy pulls her act together in 0.000001 secs as claude pulls her closer and goes back to sleep

as athy grows, claude starts allowing her to visit his office during the day until it becomes a sort of ritual - he’d have tea and milk prepared and she’d come, sitting somewhere completing a puzzle or sum while he works

mans nearly tears down the entire imperial palace the day she doesn’t show up until he finds her in the garden, teaching jettie the 'proper’ way to hold a teacup during tea parties while lilian and roger’s wife, vivian, watch

athy emotionally blackmails asks him to join the tea party, so half an hour later, anastacius finds his brother sitting on the grass with a plastic teacup that athy’s filling with hot water as she lectures him to learn to fix his posture from lily so he can sit like a “proper dignified lady”

so in the beginning, jennette actually ends up spending more time with claude than her dad. though one day, the brothers are in the audience hall when athy runs in with felix running after her telling her not to run (there’s a shit ton of guards surrounding anastacius so felix has orders to be with princess athanasia when claude is with ana)

anastacius is used to this sight, and watches, smirking at his brother’s subtle smile as athy offers him this wonky looking flower crown - claude accepts it wordlessly, and ana wants to slap his ass to sanity, who wouldn’t thank their kid when they do adorable things like this??

but then they hear another voice, and in comes jennette with vivian not too far behind her. now jettie has a much cleaner looking crown in her hand, but she glances at her father’s elaborate and beautiful crown all embedded with gems and glittering and then at the one she’s fashioned out of daisies

she's always thought she was much like her uncle - jennette was so fascinated by the plain daises, they weren’t flashy but caught her eye all the same - while athy was shiny and bold like her dad

but now she’s second guessing her choice, how could she make such a simple crown for her dad, the emperor??

claude sighs from beside anastacius and literally picks off his brother’s crown before tossing it towards a very tired felix

athy urges jennette forward, and with a bright red covering her entire face she offers the crown. jennette glances at her uncle for comfort before muttering, “for papa”

anastacius.exe has crashed

this blushly, embarrassed, and apparently talented at flower crowns kid was his?

long story short he forgets to breathe or react and jettie thinks he hates the crown and hates her and won’t ever like to see her again so she starts getting teary

claude pushes his brother’s head down before athy can be convicted for murder

ana 100% almost faints when her tiny chubby fingers delicately place the crown in place, he’ll never admit it but he closed his eyes and almost hugged her instinctively as she shyly adjusted some of his bangs around the new headpiece, muttering, “papa pretty”

jennette rushes back to her sister, who’s glaring daggers at the emperor

anastacius tries to smile to calm jennette a bit and maybe look nice enough for his niece to not kill him in his sleep

right well kiel becomes the royal playmate for both the princesses - athy has her classes with him since she’s advanced and honestly they’ll be going back forth with infodumps one minute and he’s teaching her to make paper airplanes the next

(she writes notes on the paper airplanes the next time she’s in claude’s office and flies them towards him, stuff like, 'does uncle cius also snore loudly like papa?’ and he gets seriously offended like a pissbaby)

jennette first met kiel when he was visiting his mom - vivian had to leave for a bit and she taught him a bunch of flower names and their meanings in the meantime - he makes sure to research a new flower every time he visits her, and brings her a bouquet of said flowers she always knows them but never says anything coz she doesn’t wanna hurt his feelings and he gets so excited as he tells her about their meanings it’s so cute

speaking of jennette - claude and ana may seem worlds apart but they’re at the same level of emotionally constipated

ana watches his brother and niece interact and he craves that, an unconditional, timeless love that can’t possibly be tainted by ulterior motives or the like, but he just doesn’t know how to approach little jettie

it seems easy enough - she’s a smiley, sweet girl and theoretically would be friendly if he is to approach her

but gods he’s just so ashamed - such a sweet babe grew without either of her parents and he doesn’t have an excuse because holy hell, even claude is close to athy

he’s being served food in his chambers when he asks the maid about jennette, and she tells him how among her first words was 'love’ and the brunette would just stroll the palace pointing at people and declare “love you” and watch their face light up

thats so CUTE OMFG

his jaw is touching the floor when he’s told that his daughter knows the names of every worker within the palaces

at this point he’s honestly questioning whether this child is his at all

he’s absolutely horrified at the realisation that this maid, who doesn’t even work in jennette’s part of the palace, knows more about her than he does - hell, he hadn’t even asked vivian to keep him updated on her growth, what right does he have to stick himself into her life now?

now, the maid quietly suggests starting with something small like inviting jennette to tea and

of course he goes about it the wrong way??

poor jettie thinks she’s being tested by the ruthless emperor on her etiquette and spends the entire day practicing with claude after athy guilted him into it

she’s so nervous in front of her dad that he honestly feels even guiltier, and anastacius hurries to grab her hands in his to calm their tremble as she reaches to serve him tea

she apologises lmao and he’s just so flustered himself that he orders for her to sit down and instructs her through a few deep breaths

as she calms down, ana serves her the tea before asking whether girls her age even drink tea

she says no and you can literally hear the crickets

he slides the cup he’s poured for her over to his side before gesturing towards the deserts (it was claude’s daughter-luring pro tip) on her side

“you look like you read a lot,” ana says, before asking whether she’s been reading anything interesting lately

“i don’t, actually,” she tells him shyly

anastacius laughs at how of all things his hate for books is what she got from him - and only when jennette chuckles does he realise that he said that out loud

he lets her go around her bedtime, feeling rather… energized? he doesn’t know how to explain it, but it’s a good feeling

he’s busy again the next day, but has an aide send her flowers - the same ones she had put in her flower crown for him

yes lucas is still sleeping in the palace, yes athy still finds him

so athy sees the flowers from uncle cius and is enraged, literally walks up to her uncle and demands he leave jennette alone if he’s only gonna break her heart by neglecting her

and so we have fifteen minutes of the emperor of obelia stuttering as he explains himself to this seven year old

smfh his cluelessness reminds her of her own dad and she takes pity on ana’s suffering soul

the next morning, to give him a chance to redeem himself, athy asks all four of them to have breakfast together - they accept the invitation, and despite an awkward start, the meal seems to be going well

peace is not written in this family’s fate however, and this is where the first coughing up blood thing happens

ohhhh the palace staff almost gets massacred that day

athy’s limp body is moved to jennette’s room since it’s the closest - lily bursts into tears at the very sight of her princess, jennette refuses to eat or drink until her sister can, felix hears his heart break, claude is barely holding himself together

ana is livid - who dares poison a member of his family? what has he even done to earn the privilege of calling these girls his family, when he can’t protect them, at the very least?

claude absolutely refuses to leave her room and finishes all his work right outside her door, lest she wake up in pain again

anastacius can’t keep his own anxiety about jennette at bay, insisting she sleep with him as long as claude stays with athanasia - he can tell she’s drained, and she ends up sharing some of her worries late at night. he soothes both her worries and her cries, letting her curl up into him despite it being a rather uncomfortable position

the family is thrown into chaos again once they realise it was never poison, but athy’s own magic that caused this

aka when chibi lucas drops by and voodoos her back to 100%, everyone legit starts worshipping the ground he walks on - he saved their precious princess!!

ana insists on making him athy’s royal playmate after hearing she isn’t fully healed yet

what does this give us? well, a very very early lucas vs kiel

since they’ve both got the title of royal playmate, they constantly argue on whether being the future duke alpheus is a better title than the future royal magician

the girls are always dragged into this - athy always takes kiel’s side to avenge blackie, and jennette likes kiel too, but the young magician sir saved her sister!!

so.

when vivian passes away due to an illness, it’s like roger is an entirely different person

jennette + kiel + athy all help with the funeral preparations since she was a mother/aunt to them all

felix seems to be paying extra attention to kiel

it isn’t long after this that roger decides to send him to arlanta for his studies, leaving behind two disillusioned princesses

athy spends her time viciously studying to stay ahead of arlanta’s curriculum, while jennette takes an interest in cooking

(athy tries and fails spectacularly; lucas laughs at her and jettie accidentally serves him his favourite food too salty to be edible)

a/n: this would be the first of the two parts, so stay on the lookout, hope y'all enjoyed n have a great day <3

edit: part 2

[charming-2d-boys]

Yes I’ve found another chrollo simp 🙏🏼😝 but I’m actually feeling some hisoka relationship hcs if ur ok writing for him XD <3

Hello! I'm so happy you like him too and thanks for requesting Hisoka! I definitely want to write him well and this is a start 😄

Again, sorry for the length, but when inspiration hits, it hits hard 😌

so you've apparently gotten the attention of our lovely clown 🃏

whether you have a Nen or not and whether you're physically strong or not, you're definitely patient enough with him (like a saint) or just really sassy (he always appreciates wittiness and humour, no matter how different/weird/dark it is)

since he's so used to people getting scared of him or angry, Hisoka will definitely perk up when he sees that you react differently to him, whether it's at the way he looks, acts or even what he says (he loves teasing you no matter what, but he has his moments of niceness where he teases you more light-heartedly or covers whatever he really feels with teasing tone and words)

someone treating him nicely, as if he was a normal human being and not (only) a psycho would definitely make him suspicious

I mean, no one would be nice to him unless they want something from him, right?

so when you actually treat him nicely and he realises that it's not just something temporary, either by being worried about him, making him something to eat or drink (something homemade would definitely give him a different feeling compared to some expensive dish from a Michelin 3-star restaurant) or just showing concern or interest in him as a whole, not just a side of him, he's going to be hooked and drawn to you (out of interest and curiosity, plus to rile you up and make you crack, he says at first but we know what’s gonna happen in the end 😌)

Hisoka thinks it's funny when you worry about him since he's so strong, smart and capable of taking care of himself and you, but he appreciates it nonetheless, even if he doesn't say it

when you start dating it's going to be... a bit different

he won't really ask you out and if he does, it's going to sound teasing and like he's making fun of you (I mean, he is, Hisoka loves your reactions, but when he's serious, his posture is just going to be a bit more tense than usual and if you've known him for a while, you'll notice, no matter how much he looks or sounds like his usual self)

but you'll notice how he actually spends more time with you, either at your place, his at Heaven's Arena (especially if he wants you to watch a match) or how he just takes you out more often (his favourite date was at a local festival where he managed to win a huge teddy bear without using his Bungee Gum for you and that you sometimes both sit on or cuddle since it can be used as a chair or a beanbag of sorts)

speaking of the carnival date, Hisoka will never admit it, but when you got cotton candy because he didn't want any and you asked him if he wanted to try some anyway, he kissed you and he felt his heart flutter because your lips were so sweet and he felt warmth pump in his veins when you kissed him back eagerly (he definitely teased you about it, but he felt his ears go a light shade of red, thank God his hair was down and covering them)

Hisoka will definitely teach you a few magic tricks since he knows that you're always watching him play with his cards and Bungee Gum (that has the properties of both rubber and gum.......................................................................I'm so sorry, I had to 😂)

despite saying that he's not interested in his past anymore, he often thinks about it and when you do manage to have a more intimate talk (especially when he's tired or the atmosphere is just right), he reveals snippets of how things used to be when he was a child or about his mother or even his time as a circus worker

whenever you're not feeling well, whether it’s because you're sick or just not in the mood, he's going to be there, at your beck and call, still teasing you and grinning, but actually being worried and trying his best to care for you (he definitely looked on the internet for help and asked Illumi for one of his butlers to teach him how to make some soup)

let's just say that when it comes to more intimate times, he'll always ask for consent and respect your wishes and boundaries (I headcanon that something happened to him when he was younger and because it affected him strongly, no matter how horny he is, he won't overstep those boundaries because it reminds him of what he went through)

Hisoka can read between the lines so he knows when you're playing hard to get just to rile him up and when you actually don't want to be intimate with him, if at all

in time, he'll realise that you're more than just a toy to him and he'll come to like you more and more until one day he's just going to realise he loves you

cue the Oh shit moment

he's going to need some time away from you to sort through his feelings because he's probably never felt this strong about someone before, so it's, you know, scary, probably even for him

but the realisation that he can actually see himself being with you for a longer time than he thought (you must've been together for at least a year or two, which is an impressive feat, mind you) would make Hisoka bounce back to you

again, declaring his love for you will happen very rarely, since he prefers showing you rather than telling you

though even he felt a bit embarassed when you were once ill and cuddling him (Hisoka, the human heater who doesn't really get sick, at your service), already asleep, and he only pressed you tighter into his chest and whispered an uncharacteristically soft I love you because he was worried about you when your fever wouldn't go down

he loves and I mean loves touching you, one way or another: an arm around your waist, his hand holding yours, having you in his lap or on his chest, he loves your warmth and your touch and absolutely dies on the inside whenever you play with his hair (if he had a tail, he'd probably wag it so much he'd break it)

since he has money because of all his victories at Heaven's Arena, Hisoka loves spoiling you: buys you whatever caught your attention, clothes that he knows you'd like (also buys you some clothes that he likes and thinks would look great on you - he's right, you love them and he's got great taste in fashion and no, we're not talking about the waist ball or accordion looking green undershirt), expensive food (though he always loves when you cook or when you can cook together, even if he mostly just watches and annoys you by hanging off you like a koala and kissing your neck, just because he's annoying like that) and even vacations (totally not an excuse to see you in a swimsuit)

he might not be perfect (even he admitted he has issues), but Hisoka's sure that he loves you and wants to keep you close and safe and even with all the teasing and his...hobbies, you'll always be among his priorities

[pearlsephoni]

The Trial of Shoyo Hinata’s Rising Heartrate, Witness Three: Tanaka

Can also be read on AO3!

Rating: T (just for language)

Fandom: Haikyuu!!

Pairing: Kagehina (Kageyama/Hinata)

Characters: Ryuunosuke Tanaka, Shoyo Hinata, Yu Nishinoya, Chikara Ennoshita, Hisashi Kinoshita, Kazuhito Narita

Word Count: 1,794

Summary: Ever since Kageyama and Hinata were first banned from the gym by Daichi, Tanaka had found himself taking the troublesome crows under his wings. But he still doesn't understand why he can't stop worrying about the first years' fight.

A/N: Author’s notes can be read on AO3.

Tanaka was no stranger to fights.

Well, no, that wasn’t quite right. For all his posturing, he’d never actually been in a fight. He’d gotten close a few times, but a threatening tap of his fist to his palm usually got his message across fine. And while disagreements were bound to arise within the team every now and again, he’d never seen an actual fight break out. The closest they’d come was the argument between Nishinoya and Asahi, and thankfully Tanaka had managed to hold the libero back before he tried to cause any real damage.

Which was why he’d reacted so instinctively when he followed Yachi into the gym just in time to see Kageyama fling Hinata to the floor, only for Hinata to throw himself back into the fight as recklessly as he went after Kageyama’s tosses. In the few seconds he’d seen, Tanaka knew this went beyond any other argument the first years had had before, and even went beyond any regular fistfight. There was real, tangible hurt and betrayal between the two, and his fresh instincts as a senpai made him put a stop to it as quickly and efficiently as he could.

So he punched them. And he didn’t regret it. His punches got the job done, after all.

But still…the emotions he’d seen the previous night weren’t something that would go away in the single day they had off. He wasn’t some sort of expert on emotions or anything, but he had a bad feeling their animosity would leak into the next day’s practice, and they only had a few weeks until the Spring Qualifiers.

“Ryuu.”

Those punks were at the center of their attack. If they couldn’t get their shit together, then…Tanaka would never say it out loud, but he really didn’t know if they could pull off the victories needed to go to Nationals.

“Ryuu?”

He wished he had Daichi’s calm state of mind and firm faith in the team. Maybe that was something that came with being the captain.

“Ryuu!!”

“Earth to Tanaka!”

He snapped out of his thoughts and found Nishinoya, Ennoshita, Kinoshita, and Narita staring at him, all in the middle of big bites of their lunches. “Huh?”

“Geez, man,” Nishinoya mumbled around his mouthful. “What’s up with you? You never zone out like that.”

“Sorry, I was just…did you guys hear about the fight between Hinata and Kageyama?”

“I overheard you telling the third years about it,” Ennoshita said. His eyes were on Tanaka, but he still managed to catch Nishinoya’s chopsticks before the libero could help himself to a sausage from his bento. “I don’t get it, was it any worse than their usual arguments?”

“Yeah, bruh, they were throwing each other to the ground and everything! It was crazy, Yachi thought they were going to kill each other.”

“Probably would’ve,” Kinoshita sighed. Tanaka couldn’t really see him around Narita perched on his desk, but he could imagine the chagrin on the blonde’s face. “You’d think those two hate each other if they weren’t attached to the hip.”

Narita hummed at that. “They didn’t look very attached this morning. They wouldn’t even look at each other, it was weird.”

“What’d Daichi-san say?”

Tanaka shrugged at Nishinoya. “He said they’d be fine. Said it’s not the first time they fought, and they’ve gotten over humps before. But I dunno, man…I don’t think he’d be so confident if he’d seen it himself.”

“No, that wouldn’t change,” Ennoshita murmured, “He’d still have faith in them, that’s how the Captain is.”

“So you need faith, too, Ennoshita!”

The look he pinned Nishinoya under was deeply unimpressed. “Shut up. Are you clowns done with your lunches? You gotta leave those desks soon.”

A chorus of groans rose from the group, before Tanaka, Nishinoya, and Narita obediently cleared out. After they parted ways with Narita in the hallway, Nishinoya slung an arm around Tanaka’s shoulders, tugging him into an awkward half-crouch as they walked back to their classroom. “Quit worrying about them, dude! They’ll be alright, like Daichi said.”

“Yeah...I guess we’ll see, huh?”

For the rest of the day, and the next school day, that was all Tanaka needed to ease his mind and forget about the fight. After all, Daichi was right - those two had gotten into arguments before, had entered the team practically at each other’s throats. There was no reason they wouldn’t bounce back from this, maybe even faster than they had before.

When Hinata bowed in apology to him before practice started the next day, Tanaka really thought everything was ok. The first year looked chipper as always, ready to play his hardest and push the rest of the team along with him.

Then Coach Ukai announced he would be playing with Sugawara instead of Kageyama. And the freak duo passed each other to opposite sides of the court without so much as looking at each other.

Shit.

Hinata still played well. Better than well. Tanaka didn’t know what he did with the team’s day off, but he could tell that it must’ve had something to do with volleyball.

And yet...something was off. For all his smiles and energy, he was strangely quiet. Any time he wasn’t actively playing or responding to a plan for the next rally, he seemed to draw into himself, clearly preoccupied with…something.

Tanaka could barely understand the odd, volatile, intuitive bond between the freak duo, and he didn’t really know what he could say to help them fix the fracture that had formed. But when the team got ready to split up for individual practice, he found himself approaching Hinata at the edge of the court. “Hey, Hinata.”

The first year looked up from where he was stretching on the floor. “Yeah, Tanaka-san?”

“Listen, I…I know fighting with a teammate sucks. Especially when you’re working together as much as you and Kageyama.” Or Nishinoya and Asahi. He couldn’t forget the days after Asahi left the team, when the barest mention of his name made the libero turn stiff and silent. “But it happens, man. And you’ll always have the rest of the team. We’ll be with you on the court, and we’ve got your back off the court, too.”

Hinata’s wide eyes became downcast as Tanaka spoke, and when he replied, his words were directed to the floor. “Thanks, Tanaka-san…but I dunno if I’ll even be on the court if Kageyama won’t toss to me.”

“Nah, he will!” Tanaka plopped down on the floor next to Hinata, joining him in stretching. “Kageyama’s an idiot, and he’s stubborn as hell, but man, does that guy know the game. He won’t mess it up because of a fight.”

“But then he’ll only toss the same toss that he always has, and I won’t be able to choose the path of the ball, and we’ll get blocked out again.” Hinata’s hands clenched against the floorboards, and when he looked up, Tanaka was startled by the cold focus in those usually-warm brown eyes. “I wanna fight for us on my own terms. I know I can do it. But it’ll never happen if Kageyama won’t believe in me. He’s my partner, and he doesn’t believe in me.”

Partners, huh? Tanaka was suddenly reminded of a conversation he’d stumbled across between Suga and Daichi at the beginning of the year. They hadn’t noticed him because Daichi’s eyes had been pressed behind his hands, and Suga’s eyes had been fixed on the new captain, hands gentle on his shoulders. It didn’t take long before Tanaka had felt too guilty to keep eavesdropping, but he’d heard one thing in particular from Suga that had stuck with him ever since.

“We’re partners, Daichi. On and off the court. So quit trying to handle everything by yourself and let me help.”

There was a stubborn pride in Hinata’s eyes where Suga’s had held gentle care…but their gazes did share a sense of yearning, an almost-desperate entreaty to their partners.

Tanaka knew Hinata hadn’t used “partners” with the same meaning as Suga did. But as he listened to the first year talk, he wondered if maybe it did hold the same meaning, and Hinata just had no idea yet. “He does believe in you, man. I think he’s just scared of messing with what’s worked so well. Maybe if you keep working at it by yourself, get some tips from Coach and stuff, he’ll come around. It’s happened before, and it already seems like he’s getting his ass in gear to improve his tosses.”

Hinata finally grinned at that. “I’m way ahead of you, Tanaka-san! I got Coach to help me out yesterday.”

“Yesterday. On our day off.”

“Yep!” He bounced to his feet, the pride in his eyes shining warmer with his smile. “I realized I need to get better at hitting all sorts of tosses. That way Kageyama will know that I can hit any toss he sends me!”

Tanaka could only hope his bemused disbelief didn’t show in the grin that crept across his face. “You really care about what he thinks, don’tcha?”

“Yeah! If I’m gonna beat him, then I have to be good with and without him. I have to be good by myself so I can keep playing with him.”

“That’s the spirit!” Tanaka cheered, slower to push himself to his feet. “But y’know…it’s not so bad to be ignored sometimes.” The look of pure confusion Hinata pinned on him didn’t hold any judgment, but Tanaka could still feel embarrassment creep through him. “Not on the court! Just, y’know, like how whenever Kiyoko-san ignores me, I feel extra pumped up! Even though I know she doesn’t mean anything by it.”

The small confused frown curving Hinata’s lips wasn’t making Tanaka feel any better. “Yeah, but…don’t you have a crush on her? That’s different from how it feels when Kageyama’s being a jerk.”

Oh. He really has no idea. He’s absolutely clueless. Fuck. “R-right,” Tanaka stammered. “Yeah, it’s different, sure. Forget I said anything.”

Hinata looked like he was going to ask another question, before his attention was distracted by Coach Ukai’s call for him. “Coming, Coach!” He ran off with a final smile for Tanaka, who was left standing dumbly with his bottle held limp in his hand.

So. Hinata definitely had a crush on Kageyama. And had no idea. And no one else had ever mentioned anything to Tanaka, beyond the usual musings over the way the first years bickered constantly and still managed to play like lifelong partners. Which meant Tanaka was likely the only person who had realized anything. And he wasn’t about to discuss it with anyone, it wasn’t his crush to talk about. But the realization still made secondhand embarrassment prickle through him.

“Shit,” he whispered to himself. “Those idiots are doomed.”

[fearfulkittenwrites]

“I’m fine. I’m fine.”

Summary: Dick has a nightmare that has him screaming in the middle of the night, and really struggles to accept the help of his younger brothers. His younger brothers don't really give a shit about that particular struggle of his, and stay with him even when he tells them to leave.

Word count: 1324

TW: Nightmares (No description of it in the story though)

Notes: Hello! I had this sitting in my file for a long time actually. I don't know why it took me so long to post it, tbh, but that's why I didn't include Duke, I still wasn't all that comfortable writing him a couple of months ago. Anyways, hope you enjoy!

Link for it on AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26037658

Tim heard a noise coming from his brother’s room as he walked back from the kitchen. At first he thought it was one of those noises you simply ignore, but something made him stop dead on his tracks and listen. Another weird grunt, bed creaks, and heavy breathing. Okay, that did sound too much like a noise you’d ignore. But then it got a bit louder, and he heard a small ‘no’ being mumbled. He thought about what to do, until he heard Dick screaming.

After the noise ceased, he knocked on the door and opened it slightly.

“Dick? Are you okay?”

He was sitting up on his bed, accelerated breaths and a thin layer of sweat covered his body.

“I’m fine. I’m fine.” He answered, running a hand down his face “Can you... Can you hit the lights for me?”

“Sure.” Tim clicked on the lightswich, making the room brighter.

“Thank you. I’m sorry for waking you up.”

“No problem. Also, you didn’t wake me up, I was coming back from the kitchen and heard you.” He walked in the room “Nightmares?”

“Yeah.” Dick hugged his knees. Tim sat down on the bed “It’s okay, You don’t have to stay here. I’m fine.”

Tim blinked.

“You can’t be serious.” He said.

“I’m a grown man, I can handle this type of shit.” Dick shot back, still curled in on himself. He knew his posture made the previous statement sound extremely unconvincing, but he couldn’t help it.

“Yeah, but you don’t have to do it alone. C’mon man, Jason’s like, only two years younger than you, and you never let him sleep alone after a nightmare. Let me help.”

“Grayson,” Damian asked from the door, holding his pillow “Did you have a nightmare?”

“Am I a circus show now?” Dick asked, a little annoyed.

“I mean, you are a circus freak.” Jason showed up, voice still raspy and face smushed by the pillow “C’mon devilspaw, walk in, I wanna sit.”

“Don’t call me that, Todd.” Damian shot back but complied anyways, too sleepy to defend his honor, following his older brothers and sitting on the bed “Do you need us to get you some water?” He asked, eyes half closed.

“No, I’m fine.” He answered “You don’t have to stay here guys.”

“Stop being an idiot Dickie, that doesn’t suit you.” Jason laid down “’Sides, this bed is huge. It can definetly fit us all comfortably.”

“I’m gonna go get you some water.” Tim annouced, standing up.

“Wanna talk about it?” Jason asked, hands under his head.

“Not really.” Dick answered.

“Okay then.”

“Your room is filthy, Grayson.” Damian said, looking at the pile of clothes on top of a chair.

“Shut up. Aren’t you supposed to be nice to me right now?”

“I think this is as nice as he gets.” Jason answered, snickering. Damian didn’t say anything as he hit his brother’s face with a pillow.

“Uhm, hi.” Bruce said, standing awkwardly in the door step “I heard a scream. Is everything okay, boys?”

“Yeah.” Dick nodded. Everyone was quiet for a second before Damian sighed, slightly annoyed.

“He had a nightmare, father. We’re taking care of him now.”

“Oh.” Bruce blinked. He stepped into the room and kissed the top of Dick’s head “Are you okay son?”

“I’m getting there.” Dick smiled weakly.

“Do you want me to stay here? Or maybe... If you want to, you can sleep in my room. Like when you did back when you were about this big.” Bruce smiled as he placed an open palm next to his waist to illustrate exactly how big.

“I’m fine, B.” Dick grinned up at the sleepy man, who now caressed his hair, absent minded. Dick enjoyed the touch, but knew the only thing that lead Bruce to be so open and generous with his physical demonstrations of love was his sleep deprivation reaching such a critical level that he could barely think. A whole new level of lack of self care. Still, Dick sighed, taking in the last contact he could before it ended, and said “You should go to bed. I can tell you haven’t rested properly in a while.”

“Will you be okay?”

“Aham.”

“Then I’ll go. Good Night boys.”

“’Night dad.” Jason, Dick and Tim answered.

“Good night father” Damian answered.

Tim rolled his eyes at the boy and handed Dick the water glass he had taken. His brother swallowed it down in no time. Jason scratched his back gently, making him more relaxed, and Tim played with his hair for a while. Damian rested his cheek on Dick’s shoulder, hugging his arm.

“Thanks guys.” He said.

“No worries.” Jason answered for the three of them “Can we turn off the lights now?”

“Are you... Planning on staying here?”

“-tt-. Obviously.” Damian rolled his eyes “You never leave any of us alone after a nightmare, do you think we’d abandon you now?”

“Guys, you don’t have to...”

“But we want to.” Tim cut him off “Would it kill you to let us help? Even a little bit?”

“It’s not that. I just... I feel like I’m putting a burden on your shoulders now.”

“C’mon Dickie, you’re no burden.” Jason said caringly.

“Yeah. Besides,” Tim chimmed in “I’m pretty sure this isn’t even the first time you woke up in the middle of the night over a bad dream. It’s just the first night you screamed, so it’s the first time we could help.” Dick frowned a little “Don’t look at me like that, you know I’m right. You know that you can come to us for help, right?”

The man looked down, quiet.

“I... I’m the one that’s supposed to be helping you. I’m the oldest brother. I should take care of you, not the other way around.” He said.

“Dickie, with all due respect and full offense, what the fuck kinda backwards ass, absolute clown logic is that?” Jason shot back “We’re brothers. We help each other out, no matter the ages.”

“You can lean on us, Dick.” Damian said. Tim nodded.

“Just barge into our rooms when you need to, like we do with you.”

“Yeah.” Jason spoke again “And you better start doing it more often now, jerk.”

Dick laughed a little.

“Okay, fine. I will. Just go back to scratching me though, it feels good.”

“I need to sleeeeeeeep!” Jason complained, scratching him again.

“Alright, alright, let’s sleep.” Dick laughed. Tim turned of the lights again, and they settled on the bed.

Dick slept on his back, and Jason curled up on his right side, scratching his arm. Tim settled on his left side, playing with his hair until he passed out. Damian laid on top of him, listening to his heartbeat and feeling his chest rising and falling as his brother breathed.

In the morning, they were a tangled mess of limbs and drool. Damian had, somehow, taken control of the bed, forcing the other three, much bigger boys, to smush against each other in one third of the mattress, his knees on Tim’s back. Tim was partly laying on top of the other two boys, body shaped like a ‘C’. There was a small drool puddle on Dick’s torso, and his feet were close to Jason’s arms. For some reason, the older boy held on to one of them through the night as if it was a stuffed animal. Jason’s legs were tangled with Dick’s, who had barely moved through the night, if you don’t count the several inches Damian pushed him to the right.

Alfred went up the stairs to wake the boys, but once he saw the scene, decided to call Bruce first, who may or may not have cried a little over his boys caring for each other, taking pictures he’d later fondly study and share with Clark.

(Dick was happy that his brothers cared, but not so much about the drool on his sleeping shirt.)

[malopascal]

Misery

Warning(s): crying, language, mention of alchol

A/N: This was inspired by this post

No words left Pedro’s parted lips as he softly panted, his eyes still staring down at the picture displaying on his phone. The gut-wrenching pain that he felt swell up in his chest was indescribable. He could barely feel his heart beating while tears slowly blurred his vision.

He knew very well that you were faking a smile, but the fact that you had decided to hurt him by going out with your ex and being photographed was more than enough to put the Chilean actor in a state of shock, pain, jealousy and anger.

He finally was able to blink and lock his phone, the image already burned in his brain. His phone was tossed onto the couch without a care while he slowly stood up from the couch and proceeded into pacing up and down his living room. His hands ran roughly through his delicate and silk hair before gripping the ends tightly, the stress and pain killing him.

He had so many questions.

Were you really considering getting back together with your ex while the two of you were on a break?

 Did you reach out to him first?

 Was Pedro nothing but a backup plan until your ex had his shit figured out?

The poor actor let out a frustrated groan as he stilled in the middle of the room, his breath shaky and the tears finally cascading down his handsome face. He couldn’t believe what was happening, the betrayal broke his heart.

When you had demanded a break from your relationship due to the constant fighting, he thought that you’d use the time to sit back and clear your mind. None of you could explain why the two of you couldn’t have a normal conversation without turning it into a screaming match. The reason why was because you were so focused on yelling and provoking each other that you didn’t bother to get to the bottom of your issues.

You didn’t give each other enough space and time to process every single disagreement through. Your work and inner pressure of having to be perfect had gotten the best of you, which resulted in the two of you becoming each other’s emotional punching bag. What had been a beautiful three-year relationship had now turned into bad one really quick. The love was still there though, it was just when the two of you were angry at each other, the whole world had to crash and burn to ashes.

If you hadn’t demanded a break, Pedro would’ve asked for it. You were the love of his life, but the two of you needed to fix your personal issues by yourselves. Not by constantly lashing out on each other. He wanted to marry you, expand your family of two with kids and spend the rest of his life with you.

But never would he have thought that two months into your break, you’d go back to your ex and humiliate him in front of the whole world. He didn’t know how you were doing as you refused to answer his texts and calls, which quickly resulted in him drinking his pain away. His friends and family had found him plenty of times passed out cold on the floor or in his bathtub with a bottle of Whisky or a dozen cans of beer in his grasp.

Their hearts were breaking for him.

The picture he just had seen was a few days old. Pedro was never a slave to his smartphone and caught onto the news way too late. If he hadn’t been bombarded with all the urgent texts from his siblings, he never would’ve opened the Instagram app and tumble upon the pictures of you and your ex.

How could someone be so cruel?

He thought that you loved him just as much as he loved you. Not ever did you shut him down when he talked about your future as a couple, hell, you even gave him the most beautiful smiles and answers whenever he jokingly called you Mrs. Pascal. The endless hours where the two of you gave your all into making your relationship work, all the hugs and kisses you shared…All the times you made sweet, passionate or rough love to each other… now felt like it was being flushed down the toilet.

Pedro felt his stomach churn in great stress and discomfort. He bent down and placed his hands on his knees for support as he really thought that he was about to throw up the few drinks and small dinner he had. Tonight, was actually the only night he was able to keep the alcoholic drinks to a minimum and consume some food without his stomach being in tight knots. He really thought that tonight was actually a decent night as he also had showered and changed into a fresh pair of sweats and his favorite t-shirt, his skin and hair moisturized and smelling great.

The other days, his sister and brother had to force him to down a few bites of the food they had brought or cooked for him while trying to keep him away from the alcohol, their remarks of his unpleasant body odor didn’t even make him blink as he didn’t care about how he looked or smelled.

He was finally getting back on his feet again but then this shitshow had to happen.

“I-I can’t take this anymore” Pedro hissed to himself, the anger and jealousy bubbling up in his stomach. All he could think about was you, he needed clear answers, needed to know your motives and whether the two of you were officially broken up or not.

So without a further thought, he regained his posture and snatched his car keys from the small coffee table before stomping his way out of his house.

 ~~~

 A loud sigh left your lips as you stared up at the ceiling of your bedroom. It was one a.m. but you still couldn’t sleep, the guilt of your recent actions leaving you with temporary insomnia. “Fuck” you groaned out loud and sat up in your bed, your eyes clenching shut for a few seconds as you felt absolutely disgusted with yourself.

Just an hour ago, you had blocked your ex on your phone and social media. Yes, the ex you had gone out with a few days ago. It was just for lunch but it was awkward as hell and you a got fresh reminder of why you had broken up with him in the first place. But you just had been sick and tired of hurting and being in suspense of whether Pedro still wanted to be with you or not that you had decided to let your pettiness and insecurities get the best of you.

You knew that it would only take a few days for him to see the pictures and hopefully feel as miserable as you were.

“Shit!” you hissed out and jumped out of bed, being hit with a wave or reality; Why in the hell did you even go out of your way to put up this stupid act when you refused to even let Pedro know how you were doing?

That man loved you to the core but instead of owning up to your past mistakes and contribution to the toxic circle your relationship ended up turning in to, you thought that being childish would solve everything and put you out of your misery.

Boy, were you wrong.

Tears filled your eyes as you felt so ashamed and disgusted by yourself. You had turned yourself into a monster and now the whole world had seen you make a fool out of yourself. You didn’t have to grab your phone and go on Instagram to know that people already were calling you a slut for jumping from Pedro right back into the arms of your ex.

You wished that you could go back in time and prevent yourself from sending your ex a text message that resulted in the two of you going out for lunch. The lunch itself was just bad and awkward, the narcissistic bastard happily voiced how he knew that “you’d run back to him” once realizing that “you needed him”.

Your stomach was in tight knots and you could barely swallow down the food while having to listen to him brag about all the other people he’s dated, even adding that you were “nothing compared to them”. Your stupid pride however prevented you from standing up, giving him the smack of a lifetime (something he really deserved) and leaving the place with the tiny bits and pieces of what were left of it.

Instead, you made yourself look like a bigger clown and pretended to enjoy the insults and useless information your ears were polluted with. You left the restaurant with the biggest, fakest grin on your face while holding onto your ex’s shoulders, trying to get to your car as quickly as possible. The second you hopped in it, you had noticed the paparazzis and knew that your idiotic plan had succeeded.

Ever since arriving home, the guilt started to eat you alive and resulted in you lying down in your bed since the late afternoon. Your stupid ex had the nerve to text you to let you know that he was horny and wanted some sexy pics of you. That text alone got him permanently blocked from your phone, social media accounts and life.

“I’m such an idiot” you cried to yourself, the room filling up with your sobs as you plopped back down at the edge of your bed. You knew that Pedro was somewhere hurting because of you, the mere thought of him in pain causing your heart to painfully clench in your chest.

You tried to calm down, even your breath while wiping the thick tears off your face. You needed to redeem yourself, let Pedro know that you loved him and hoped that he’d be able to forgive your petty and childish behavior.

“[Y/N!]”.

The loud call of your name startled you as your heart skipped several beats before pounding loudly against your ribcage. “Pedro” you whispered to yourself before slowly standing up and staring at the door.

The loud stomping of his footsteps approached your bedroom and you couldn’t help but freeze on the spot. You didn’t know what to do, you hadn’t prepared for this, but a part of you was excited that you’d get to see the man you loved so much again.

When the door to your bedroom finally opened and the love of your life was standing a few feet away from you, fresh tears cascaded down your cheeks again. He looked as handsome as always, but the stress and pain radiating off him was also instantly caught your eyes. His hair was a tousled mess and he was panting loudly while staring right back at you. His eyes penetrating yours so intensely, you started to feel shy under his gaze.

Seconds went by while the tension thickened in the room. A talk was overdue and you didn’t have the courage so initiate it.

“Why, [Y/N]?” Pedro finally asked, his voice calm but the anger still shadowing in the back. He swallowed hard while you slowly parted your lips.

“I-I-“

“Why?!” your boyfriend repeated louder, making you jump in surprise but also making you come to your senses.

“Because I wanted to make you feel as miserable as I am” you finally confessed, seeing him shake his head in pure disappointment. “So” he began and approached you, “You thought that hurting and humiliating me in front of the whole world would seal the deal?”.

Your stomach churned in shame and guilt as you avoided his now angered and pained glare. Your toes were suddenly very interesting to look at as you were being confronted.

“I-I didn’t know what to do…I was afraid and anxious that you didn’t want me anymore…That this break would make you realize that you didn’t wanted to stay with me…” soft sniffles left your nose.

You swallowed the last pieces of your pride and lifted your head, looking straight into Pedro’s eyes. “And instead of actually answering my texts and calls, you just jumped to that conclusion huh?”.

His words were cold like ice, his jaw was tensed as he waited for your response. “I-I’m sorry” you whispered weakly, exhausted and so over the thick cloud of pain and stress that was settled deep in your chest. Words couldn’t describe how sorry you were for having changed into this anger driven person that only sought out to seek revenge, focusing on the negative feelings instead of the positive ones.

“You hurt me” Pedro sighed, his expression changing from angered to pained and tired. You saw the dark rings he had under his eyes, silently concluding that he wasn’t sleeping well.

“

Scream how much I love you but also how much you’ve hurt me, [Y/N]”. Your heart painfully clenched in your chest as you threw your arms around his shoulders and buried your head in the crook of his neck, his delicate scent filling up your nostrils and making you realize how much you actually missed your boyfriend.

It took him a few seconds to hug you back as his brain was processing your touch. He had gone two months without it and had craved it so much to the point where he almost forgot how pleasant and soothing it was to feel you so close to him. When his arms finally wrapped themselves around your waist, you let out another sniffle before clearing your throat.

“I can’t explain how sorry I am Pedro, we were in a bad place and I am also to blame for it. Instead of telling you how I felt, I kept everything inside and just used every opportunity to lash out on you…

Your words and actions hurt me but I had to communicate correctly with you and try to get you to stop the madness and find a solution. Not turn into a petty child”. You could feel the pain slowly become lighter with every word that left your mouth.Why did you make the two of you suffer so much?

Pedro sighed and clenched his eyes shut, the tears rolling down his cheeks as he held you closer. “And I am so sorry for doing the same thing, getting angry instead of taking a breather and gently explaining the chaos going in my mind. Please forgive me, mi amor”.

“I forgive you. I forgave you a little while ago. I need you to forgive me too, my stupid actions and everything else…I don’t like him, never really did”. The room then was silent as you let your words process in your minds. Your boyfriend forgave you in a heartbeat, but knew that it would take some time for him to forget what you had done.

The sniffles slowly subsided, the tension lighter.

“I love you” Pedro whispered, his head nuzzling in the crook of your neck. His soft lips and beard tickling the sensitive skin there. “I love you” you instantly whispered back, your heart body and soul at peace again. He was the love of your life, no one could make you feel so secure and protected and at home. Both of you had some work to do as individuals but you knew that your love had only grown stronger for each other and would be able to survive other challenges life would throw at you.

~~~

Tag list: @pascalisthepunkest​ @thickemadame​ @talesfromtheguild​ @synystersilenceinblacknwhite​

Thanks for reading!

[jadekitty777]

Snapshot Aesthetics

OKAY BUT FG WEEKEND? WHO’S CRAZY IDEA WAS THAT.

You better know I want to participate though xD I didn’t plan to have an entry for today but, well, things change lol

Day 1: Outfits

Rating: K

Words: 2.2k

Summary: Clover's job was simple: Get the model to pose properly, smile, and take the shot. But the new hire, Qrow, was about to throw a wrench into that simplicity... in more ways than one. [Fashion Model AU]

Ao3 Link: Snapshot Aesthetics

~

Snap!

The sound of his camera shutter going off was almost inaudible under the early morning hustle that had overtaken the studio. Clover inspected the shot of Elm displaying back on his LCD screen. He shook his head, calling to the stagehand, “Lower the forelights! There’s too much washout!”

“You got it boss.” She saluted, stepping off the scene to go tinker with the fluorescents.

Th telltale sound of stilettos had his head turning, seeing Willow striding over, lips pursed with annoyance. “Are we ready yet?”

“Almost.” He assured, showing her the picture. “Just a bit more tweaking on the lights and we’ll be good to go.”

She placed a hand on her hip, scanning the team critically. “Good.”

“Everything alright? You look…” He mulled over all his safe adjective options, “Unhappy.”

She sighed exasperatedly. “Qrow is causing a bit of a ruckus back in dress. Won’t let Kali even do his makeup.” She pinched the bridge of her nose. “I don’t know what I was thinking, listening to Taiyang.”

“It’s probably because the new guy’s pretty.” And related to Raven, he thought but didn’t dare utter the runway model’s name aloud. If he did, then it would make his manager think of her ex-husband and Raven’s agent, Jacques Schnee. That was a nasty pandora’s box he’d rather keep closed.

Nevertheless, it certainly wouldn’t be the first time she hired someone simply based on an affiliation they had to someone in Jacques’ team, thinking it as some retroactive way of getting back at him. Taiyang himself was one such decision, also ironically due his connection with Raven. Though, he’d heard the two’s relationship had been more… carnal in nature.

The plus was, Taiyang had worked out great. He was handsome and jovial and easy to direct on set. Clover’s only hope when he learned of the new hire was that the same could be said for Qrow; but, it was sounding like he had his twin sister’s notorious diva-like personality, if Willow’s frustration was anything to go by. Which meant he was in for a long day.

“Light check!” Elm called, flexing both arms proudly like a muscle builder.

He snapped the shot, then nodded at the quality. “Perfect!”

Willow swiveled, heading for the door. “Let’s get started then.”

~

Over the course of the seven years Clover had worked for Trendy magazine, he’d discovered that each fashion designer had a specific ‘taste’ they were going for when it came to showing off their line-up and he’d learned to pose the models accordingly to keep their clients happy and coming back for each issue. So, he kept certain things in mind with each designer’s desires, like how Sienna preferred her poses to be as dynamic and wild as possible and Camilla wanted proper posture and a bit of elegance.

Unfortunately, today’s clothing line was from Roman and Neo. Which meant balancing the two designers’ conflicting requirements of flamboyance and subtlety into one picture. It tended to lead to a lot of small changes for limb placement and expression before he ever even rose his camera.

So, it tended to be a relief when the snap sounded off and he said, “Alright, you’re done!”

“Oh, thank god!” Tai slumped over immediately, rolling out his shoulders. “I think my neck has a crick in it.”

Clover snorted. “Alright drama king. Go take a break.” He turned towards the doorway, calling, “Who’s next up?”

He heard Kali’s faint, “Get in there. And stop messing with your hair!”

A gruff voice he didn’t recognize replied, “Yeah, yeah, yeah.” Before Qrow Branwen walked into the room and stole his breath away.

Though he’d joked before, Clover hadn’t actually known what the man had looked like. He rarely did see new models before their first shoot. But now that he was, it had to be said that maybe Willow had indeed hired Qrow simply for his beauty. In almost every way, he was like a softer version of his sister. Where her skin was striking alabaster white, his had more of a welcoming ivory tone. Where her eyes were bright scarlet, his were a gentle vermillion. And where her hair was an ink black, his held streaks of dusty grey that somehow was just enough to make him appear refined, but not old.

Combine that with Roman and Neo’s classy “modern early-1900’s” style, and he looked absolutely dazzling. It was one of their simpler pieces, but dress had made sure he wore it well, especially with the plain, long-sleeved, white dress shirt that someone had decided to undo the top few buttons off to frame a cross necklace hanging sideways. Pulled over that and adding some muted color was a double-layered vest that buttoned from the bottom of the ribs down. The inner layer was a slate grey while the outer layer was a deep charcoal and had a tasteful embroidery design flowing down the sides. The matching dark grey slacks were fairly standard but nicely fitting to the man’s ridiculously long legs. Completing the picture were some shiny cap-toed black dress shoes.

“So uh, how do you want me?” Qrow asked, fidgeting with the cross-shaped cufflinks of his shirt.

Splayed across my bed. Clover shook himself of any indecent thoughts, nodding towards the set that mimicked an old parlor room. “Center stage, leaning back on the table.”

He nodded, crossing the room.

As they passed each other, Tai offered a thumb’s up and a cheery, “Good luck!”

The little half-grin Qrow offered his friend left Clover floating.

Not that the other man was going to need any well wishes, as he’d decided on something fairly simplistic. As Qrow took position, he directed, “Alright, I want you to rest your hands on the table, in view. Keep your fingers spread out.”

“Like this?” He settled them by his hips.

“Mm no. Spread your arms further apart. Position your hands the other way, pointing opposite directions. Yeah – like that! A little more for the right hand. Relax your shoulders more. No, no not that much.” And on and on it went, as Clover altered each little angle and body part until he had the exact position in mind. Yet, despite the ease of what he was asking for, Qrow’s inexperience meant he had to spend twice as long getting things just right.

It quickly became clear by his 60th order that the older man was growing a bit exasperated.

Clover eyed him up and down. Hummed thoughtfully at the position of where his ankles crossed, the toe of one dress shoe pointed down. “Okay, tilt your left heel just a bit more.”

“Is all this really necessary?” Qrow grumbled, trying not to move anything else but his foot.

“When the client is picky, yeah. And stop clawing your fingers. Keep them flat.”

The other man breathed in and out slowly, carefully resting down his hands.

He gave him another once over. Frowned.

The tension he could easily see doubled as Qrow demanded, “What now?”

“Maybe we should try something different.” He considered.

The words were met with Qrow groaning out, “You got to be kidding me.”

And Willow cutting in, “Go with it. We got to get this shoot done before noon!”

He glanced at his wristwatch. Shit, was it really almost eleven? He still had four other designs to go. “Yeah, alright. Qrow, just try to relax your muscles a bit.” He rose his camera. “Alright, now smile.”

He did, stretching it as big as he could.

Clover looked at him over the lens, raising a brow. “I said smile, not look like you’re trying to imitate clown make-up.” Ignoring the other’s sarcastic laughter, he mulled it over, then snapped his fingers. “Ah, I know! Give me the same one you gave to Tai when you first walked in.”

He could tell it wasn’t quite right when it didn’t have the same cloud nine effect on him as before, but with the clock ticking in his head, he took the shot.

“Alright, that’ll do.” Clover said.

“We’re done?” Qrow asked, not moving an inch, as if worried he’d change his mind.

“Yep. You’re free as a bird.”

That earned him a real laugh. “That was awful!”

For the hell of it, he took another shot.

~

There was always such a sense of relief when Clover submitted the photos to processing. From there the team would do whatever touch ups were necessary before it went in for print. Normally, the rest of his day was done, but he had another engagement at a rally across town that would keep him busy well into the evening. So, he found himself stepping into the break room, intent on grabbing a cup of coffee and heading on his way.

He was surprised to find Qrow there, huddled in one of the corner tables. He was dressed down, back in his casuals, but still managed to make a t-shirt and some slacks look like runway material. They met gazes briefly, before the elder man’s eyes dropped back to his phone, not saying a word.

Already short on time, Clover was content to leave it like that, but as he finished mixing his coffee together, guilt seeped in. If they were going to be working together, then one of them had to take the first step and it was much harder for the new guy to take it.

“You did good today.” He spoke.

Qrow scoffed. “You kidding? I was a disaster.” He groaned, running a hand through his hair. “I’ll be lucky if they ask me to come back.”

Ah. So, he wasn’t a snob - he was insecure. Clover could work with that.

“Ah come on. It wasn’t that bad.” He crossed the room, turning the opposite chair sideways and falling into it. “You’re just a little stiff. A few more of these and you’ll relax.” He paused, then added, “Oh, and take it a little easy on the people in dress.”

“They were trying to poke my eye out! Whoever invented eyeliner is a demon.”

He guffawed heartily. “It’s not that bad.”

Qrow sighed, ruffling a hand through his hair. “Still, I don’t know what I was thinking, letting Tai convince me to take this job.”

Seemed Tai was doing a lot of that lately.

“I’m not a model. That’s my sister’s gig. And…” Qrow gestured to himself. “I mean, look at me.”

“Oh yeah, I’m sure it must get tiring getting all those calls from Mr. Universe asking you to come reclaim your crown.” He countered.

“Tch, if anyone’s got a crown to go reclaim, it’s probably you.” A second later, he seemed to realize what he said and hid his face in his hand. “Oh my god, I didn’t just- I’m sorry, that was inappropriate.”

Clover couldn’t stop grinning. “Relax gorgeous. You’re in the right business to be making comments like that.” He took a sip of his coffee. “Don’t feel so bad, either. You’re not the only one self-conscious around here. Winter? Breaks out before every shoot. James? Has a scar right here.” He ran a finger above the line of his right eyebrow. “And by now, we’ve got to be giving Tai a complex with how much gets altered in processing.”

“He certainly had a lot to say about last month’s issue.”

“Well, you know, we gotta follow those trends and freckles are in.” He was sure there was a lot of talk on the questionable ethics of digitally changing people’s appearances to portray an unobtainable beauty, but it was a topic he wasn’t too interested in engaging with. In the end, it all just came down to the paycheck and keeping people’s jobs. Because if a model couldn’t sell the clothes they were wearing, then they weren’t going to get to keep modeling them.

Qrow leant back, crossing his arms. “Wonder how much they’ll change about me.”

“Well, they’ll definitely take out those cute wrinkles you get around your eyes when you laugh.”

“I wasn’t laughing?”

“Not in the first shot. But I may have…” He shrugged sheepishly. “Taken another one, right at the end? You looked more natural.”

Qrow blinked. “Well. Alright then. Guess that’s why you’re the expert.” His gaze drifted past Clover’s shoulder at about the same time he heard the footsteps. “Hey Tai. All done?”

“Yeah.” The blond replied as he stopped at their table, eyeing him suspiciously. “Hopefully the company flirt wasn’t giving you trouble.”

“Oh sunshine,” Clover drawled, playing it up as he bat his eyelashes at the other man. “I hope you know you’re my one and only.”

He snorted, rolling his eyes. “Save it for the guys actually swinging your way.” He nodded to his friend. “Come on, we better get moving if we want to get the girls on time.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Qrow stood. “It was nice meeting you Clover.”

“Same here. Looking forward to working with you.” He replied sincerely. A pleasant little warmth tingled through him when the sentiment earned him an adorable smile.

As he watched him go, Clover cast his earlier worries aside and decided that this truly was the beginning of a beautiful relationship.

[xxforsaken-angelxx]

=> A Friendly Secret Visit.

chimericarchitect Howdy! I wanted to ask about the rods and how that was coming along.

xxforsaken-angelxx aww shit yeah i got them i just slipped on messagin you

chimericarchitect Neat! So, let me know whenever it is clear for me to come and get them and I'll do that.

xxforsaken-angelxx gotcha > You'll send her a time for later today, after your shift is over.

chimericarchitect > Presumably he will send updated coordinates since it's a ship in space and you will, at the time allotted, go there to pick up the rods. It'll be great.

xxforsaken-angelxx > He will, and she'll be teleported straight to his block.

> Or at least part of his block. It visibly looks like a study, with floor to ceiling shelves on the two walls without doors that are loaded with jars of herbs, crystals, bones, and basically any other magical trinket that gets used in his kind of trade. That and what's probably a fairly narrow curation of books, most of them looking old or otherwise well loved.

> You're at your desk nestled in there, in front of an oddly old looking computer. You're dressed in full goffik attire, with the boots and the long coat and the whole nine yards.

chimericarchitect > Saness might like what she knows of Grinmaww, she might think he seems a pretty decent troll, but that doesn't change the fact that he is an unknown. She is dressed accordingly, in what she used to consider 'cool adventurer attire,' something good to tussle in or go for an impromptu roam. It consists of a sturdy white vest over long dark sleeves, equally white boots over flexible black pants, an overly vibrant neckerchief, and a wallet chain on her hip that definitely doesn't connect to a wallet. With her sunglasses up in her stark-white dandelion puff of curling hair, useless but available, Saness looks like a starry-eyed kid dressed up as a cosplay biker.

> She arrives in a blossoming yellow-green light, accompanied by the sound of something stretching sharp, the hollow bell-tone echo of a rubber band snapping, an unnaturally compressed static twang. It's only a fall of a few inches to the floor of the ship, boots tmp-ing with the weight of her existence as the glow recedes as rapidly and efficiently as it had appeared. With her face fully exposed, it can be noted on a glance that her hair grows in this shade. That, or she spends way too much time dying her eyebrows and lashes.

> Immediately Saness looks to Grinmaww, the full attention of 5' 10" of dimension-hopping globetrotter drawn right to him by some force unknown. There is a sort of reckless energy to the way she carries herself, careless of her color, focused intently and intensely on the only other troll in the room. It lingers for a heavy second, gears turning behind her eyes, before scattering nearly as immediately under the force of her own curiosity and whimsy, the dopey little 'o' of her mouth and the perplexed pinch of her brow turning to a wowed smile while the slightly flighty hands-out posture of her arms falls to her sides as she straightens. Her eyes gleam when they catch light, a reflective plate of lime snapping here and there over all of the fascinating and colorful doodads filling the walls of this space.

> "My dude, you are absolutely killing this aesthetic."

> She defaults to common Alternian, for all purposes friendly and easygoing in tone, if a little bright with excitement.

xxforsaken-angelxx > That cracks him up immediately, after those few seconds of regarding each other in silence. His face is...oddly stretchy, the skin pulls a little farther than most people when he smiles.

> Which is why he doesn't, when he rises out of his office chair to full 6'5" stature. It's not exactly an Ampora Resting Bitch Face, his eyes stay friendly, but there's all the signs of someone who keeps their expressions trained.

"Well shit, mission fuckin' accomplished then. I'm diggin' your whole look too, though. Y'look cute."

> And how dare she, frankly? Meeting someone from a whole other universe was supposed to be a big deal, both from a mental and security standpoint, but here she was waltzing up with the aura of a box of novelty rubber ducks. It's hard to be all serious at that, bah.

chimericarchitect > Cute, huh? Saness grins a little wider, something easy and lopsided. She's being very loose with her expressions, leaning heavily into what charisma she possesses over her own stranger-danger default; there has not been one single Eridan in the history of fish-or-otherwise bastards that she has ever gotten along with, but in counter she has a great and hopeful fondness for Makaras and clowns in general. All she has to do is be her charming self and *surely* things will work out. Surely. So far so good, right?

"Well shit, mission fuckin' accomplished!" she intones in quick mimicry, momentarily affecting his cant and general tone of bearing. That too falls away, dripping from one instant to the next with the pulse of a rabbit. A flourish places her splayed fingertips over her chest, the goofish mockery of a stuffy tilt to her chin. "Saness Casper Psuede, The Mischief, at your service and pleased to finally meet you, Grinmaww!"

> She is, perhaps, a bit much at full-tilt, hyped to be here and make a solid first impression. Ideally, Grinmaww will like her as much as she hopes to like him. That's the plan. The scheme. The big cannoli. *Maybe* this critically informal introduction will entice him into relaxing as well. A girl can dream.

xxforsaken-angelxx > Hearing his drawl coming out of her makes him laugh again, and he instinctively tries to go for a handshake. Just a casual one. Business casual.  

"Man, you're somethin', arentcha? And somethin' that should use Mischief more often, that's a good one."

> Truth be told, he was already fond of her. Being in the position he was, he tended to like people who had a different view of the world, and Saness kept fitting that to a T. Even discounting her inherent otherworldly-ness, she was people smart in a way he couldn't manage, and just...had a certain way of things. Maybe a way that clashed with his way sometimes. But it was an interesting way, and an interesting clash.

> Sure being the leader of a big ass ship also put him in that same zone of inner stranger wariness, but y'know. So far so good!

"Nice to finally meet you too."

chimericarchitect > The Dreaded Handshake, As The Prophecy Foretold. With how sharp she keeps her claws these nights the best she can do to cover up is to wear fingerless gloves, but that is inconducive to the possibility of reacting to danger, and she anticipated that the ever-present threat of engaging in polite society might rear itself anyway. Thus, a counter arrangement has been prepared in advance: completely naturally, despite her lack of hand cover, as if this was the response expected of her, Saness reaches past Grinmaww's outstretched palm and clasps his covered forearm. A bracing, friendly gesture!

> It's loose enough an action that she doesn't have time to react to new information, or to accommodate the unexpected. From this close, she can feel her hair standing on end, a fresh tingle across the nape of her neck. This isn't Chill Boss Aura, the weight of his presence more intense with proximity, but rather something else entirely. Something otherworldly. The trouble with keeping her features emotionally available and reactive is that, they are, in fact, emotionally available and reactive. Her eye scrunches slightly and her smile ticks one degree toward uncomfortable on the matching side.

> Braced like this, she gives his arm the single handshake pump of proper business, albeit a fraction of a second delayed.

> Quick, say something.

"Ah, yeah, you think so? I thought it was kinda, heh, on the nose. If somebody were to roll up and introduce themself with the title of 'Mischief' you'd have certain expectations, I'd think."

xxforsaken-angelxx > Eridan isn't oblivious enough to miss her sudden awkwardness, but it's also not like he knows his own aura, or any other reason Saness might avoid handshakes. In his mind he just went too formal, like a dumbass. He goes a touch sheepish when she goes a touch awkward, and flicks his hair and plays it cool when she lets go.

> The third eye he draws in his paint wasn't peeking through his bangs until now.

"I mean, sure. But that kind of expectation would probably get you some friends around somewhere like here. Mischief and clowns go together, right?"

> Hopefully, at least?

chimericarchitect > Once released she gives him a conspiratorial smile, waggles a finger, and says, "Those mischievous clowns," in that fake-cursing sort of tone, meant to confirm his assertion.

> Now that she's aware of an otherworldly presence, she is Aware of it. It's kind of just all over the place, isn't it? And her new friend appears to be the epicenter...

> From this point out, her attention is going to be partially split. Whatever it is, it doesn't *feel* directly threatening, but it's definitely unlike the clown deities she's met. It's... not quite familiar. Grinmaww's angels? But it doesn't feel like the angels she's known either, not... quite... Perhaps they aren't angels at all. That's the unsettling part. People and things that identify as other things can have a lot of reasons for doing so. Half the angels she's met weren't so nice anyhow...

> Most of the time she keeps her attention politely fixed on Grinmaww, but it slips through him or past him here and there, occasionally flitting elsewhere in the room. Saness cannot help but be wary in the back of her mind.

> Uncultured, she points right at his face.

"In every timeline I've visited or heard of, face paint holds a lot of personal significance to the clowns who wear it." Her arm drops to her side and she rocks on her toes in a gentle and harmless fidget. "Is it too personal to tell me about? I'm curious."

xxforsaken-angelxx > There's those in the church that don't believe that *any* of the entities are who they say they are. Some believe they're all more of a subconscious figment than anything else- not nonexistant, per se, but a form to let the troll mind comprehend something uncomprehendable. Eridan does believe in his angels, but he's not... unfamiliar, with the idea that they might not be so straightforward.

> He doesn't know that's what's on her mind, but *they* do. They can sense her attention. They know she can feel them. And they...want to play nice, actually. Yes they're everywhere, yes they have him in their grasp, but does that have to feel so bad? They can at least try to be a bit more friend shaped.  

> Meanwhile, their host gets thrown by that question. Not in a defensive way, just in a purely off-guard one.

"Uh, no, it's not, it's-" He gestures, aimlessly. "It's not actually *that* big of a thing? For us? Like it's real fuckin' important, don't get me wrong, but it's not like- it's not *sacred.* It's fashion."

> He shoved his hands in his pocket, and gave his jacket a bit of a flounce.

"I uh...picked mine when I was pretty young. The whole painted on smile and the tears and the secret eye. It's all kinda obvious. But I still like the vibe. Still me and such."

chimericarchitect > Saness can... kind of feel them, the attention of Grinmaww's angels in response to her awareness. She can detect the things they broadcast most blatantly, the more gentle way they coil, the intentional friendliness. Perhaps an act like that would put a more paranoid troll on higher alert, but where most people have a healthy level of mistrust for the unknown, developed or instinctual, Saness has stubbornly hoarded olive branches to clumsily brandish at anything that exists. If they want to be friendly, then by the stars, Saness is going to give them her reckless trust and put her faith where her mouth is.

> Understanding that the angels are at least *similarly* aware of her the way she is aware of them, Saness begins working through the process of lowering her mental hackles, just as intentionally relaxing as they intentionally displayed peace. She loves being cool and playing nice, well and truly.

> It helps that Grinmaww is so cute. Look at him, fumbling and fluffing his feather. Normally she would giggle at him, laughter comes so easily to her, but with her focus split, all she does is smile fondly. It feels safe enough to relax around him, and they all vibe together as a unit, so... Yeah. Everything is cool and she is pleased to make more than one acquaintance. Yep. That's what she's rolling with.

"So, dedication to fashion is really important, but being a clown is not an organized religion beyond being purple and... being goth..." The last part is said almost like a question. "Would you be in trouble if you didn't wear paint, if it isn't sacred? What about like, partial coverage? In public and stuff. Oh, and, um, the whole... distinction thing. Goth is more elegant? Than punk? Or like, grunge, or emo. Are you supposed to dedicate yourself to YOUR aesthetic or is there a dress code? Is 'goth' an important word? Does equating it to other aesthetics come across as rude?"

> Special Move: One Thousand Needling Questions no Jutso.

xxforsaken-angelxx "You don't get in *trouble* for not wearing the paint, no. Like, most people around here wouldn't want to be out an' about without it or nothin', but just in the way anybody else who wears a lotta makeup wouldn't. Partial coverage's fine, too. I know this one chick who does a pattern with half her face, 's'cool as hell. And there is absolutely not a dress code beyond legal modesty and safety regulations, I almost can't believe you gotta ask that."

> He says it with fondness, as he leans up against his desk. He could talk about this stuff forever, he just had to settle into the rhythm of it. His gods seemed to enjoy it too, maybe, almost curling up beside him once he got on a roll.

"Self expression is important to us. It's an inherent part of our magic. We're all brought together around a school of thought with magic that's about experimentation and what you feel, so, like. If you're callin' up the damned with scryin' bones, why the fuck *shouldn't* you wear a full black velvet cloak, y'know? Why not wear it out to get a sandwich every night, if that's what makes you happy?"

"So comparin' us to punk or whatever else is rude just 'cause it's not us. We have an ideology, and punk has a totally different ideology, an' none of us really want to be lumped together when it doesn't stand for the same thing."

chimericarchitect "Then... what is the goth clown ideology? Under that umbrella of self-expression and exploration... are there pretty pastel clowns, peppy and chipper, or clowns that... essentially aren't goth? That sounds really kind of cool though, being encouraged to pursue happiness in the empire. Are there purplebloods that aren't clowns, or is it kind of mandatory?"

> Saness is slowing down a touch, pretty sincerely fascinated by this topic. Culture in general is wildly engrossing, but she has a particular passion for the heavy familial nature of mirthful society.

> She follows his lead, to a degree, crossing her arms and resting her weight unbalanced on one leg, hip cocked out just slightly to accommodate. Very laid-back. One foot taps, keeping time with the pace of her thoughts.

"And, I mean, I *assume* it's just purplebloods and not other colors that join the faith in your society, but it doesn't hurt to ask. Doctrines and ideologies tend to conceptually elude me, but I do so love to hear about them."

xxforsaken-angelxx "Just purplebloods, but it's not mandatory, no. Most of us end up here anyways, but there's plenty that don't. And..."

> There's a pause as he chews on his words a bit. He's had to explain something to this effect several times before, and every time it's a little different. A little closer to what someone who's Grand Highblood might say.

"We think that belief is the most important part of magic. The rituals you do and the entities you work with are just...methods. What makes it *work* is what you feel. And if you *know* that, then you can take your belief and apply it on purpose to somethin' workin' to your advantage. So we just... believe in doin' what personally works for you. Celebratin' what personally works for you. There's no reason you can't be cheery and also goth, or be some pastel fuck and also goth. We're only gonna question you if *you* don't think you're doin' it right. You have to believe you are. Genuinely."

chimericarchitect > Saness inclines her head, an inquisitive pinch to her brow. It's not fully intentional, but she keeps mentally checking in on the spectral presence surrounding Grinmaww, akin to curious little 'are you still there' pokes while he talks.

"That's what goth is? Celebrating the self?"

> Her expression smooths away and she straightens with a soft laugh.

"I mean, heh, wow." She waves a hand, gesturing over his whole him.

xxforsaken-angelxx "I have no idea what you're talking about," he says, playfully shaking his head.

> The angels are also very there. They're Always there. Or at least, some of them are. Sometimes there's more, sometimes there's less, but there's always *something*.

> They tend to poke back, too. It's fun having friends.

chimericarchitect > She shakes her head, still smiling.

"Alright, so, next question. I think I saw the answer before on tumblr maybe, but I don't remember it at the moment. Can you always sense your angels?"

> Yeah she came here with a purpose, but Saness has never been very business-oriented. She hasn't been here long enough for the recycled air to bother her, she's barely been here long enough to appreciate the fact that she's in space. Vacuums and stable pressurized ships aren't as easy to replicate, she's kind of lucky not to be experiencing some kind of reaction to the environment. The thought is starting to creep into her head, the idea that there could be so much more to see.

> Somewhere in the bowels of this contraption, Hydromatic dangles in some kind of torture stasis.

xxforsaken-angelxx > Somewhere, Hydromatic is at their station, filing through dozens of simultaneous requests and trying to scrape up the spare seconds to fantasize about their matesprit. Piers is somewhere as well, possibly finishing his shift.

> And the ship is just generally bustling with life. It was a massive place, filled with a town's worth of purplebloods. Each one had their own magic, their own loud style, their own gods...

"Pretty much always, yeah. Sometimes I get distracted, but they're always there."

chimericarchitect "Does it still get lonely sometimes, even if you're never alone? How old were you when you like, met them? And, um..."

> Saness glances toward the door and lets her continuation hang in the air for a moment, not quite stilling so much as slowing her idle animation. There's a lot to consider, all the mystery and intrigue just beyond, but she knows full well she'd never be allowed to pass through. Not in a thousand sweeps. What would she even do? Act like a lost tourist and get Grinmaww into trouble?

> She slides her focus back into the room, back onto her host and off of stray thoughts of the fantastical. Her hands go into her pockets and she gestures toward him with a shrug of her shoulder.

"Are the subjects of everyone else's devotion so present as yours? Can you sense or otherwise detect them yourself?"

xxforsaken-angelxx "I'm not the lonely type. But I met 'em when I was like...five-ish? Which is young, for us. I had more resources than most wrigs would've, an' I just...had a strong pull, I guess."

> A strong pull and a florid imagination. His eyes follow hers before he can get too wrapped up in thinking about his old hive life, though. If it were anybody else, he'd be glad to show her around the ship. There were constant visitors on the Hydromatic, so one more wouldn't be terribly out of place.

> As long as they were like, actual Imperial citizens with travel paperwork. And not of a blood color that didn't exist here. So unfortunately that wasn't happening, even if they both wished it would.

"...I don't think everybody's are. Kinda depends. But magic just has a vibe, I can feel that usually."

chimericarchitect > ...Huh. What if he's picking up magic vibes off of her? Wicked undid those... locks or whatever, and she did attend a single quarter of lessons at the magic college, even if she was pretty much fully incompetent with her abilities. She would think, 'nah, they're totally different things probably,' but here she is and she can sense his angels, so... maybe not? But maybe it's like, a warlock thing, rather than strictly a magic thing. She doesn't have a magic sugardaddy hovering around her twenty-four seven for him to detect. Or even like. Sugardaddy La Croix. Residual sugardaddy. Hint of having been near a sugardaddy that might have side-eyed her once.

"Well, the angels seem really pleasant and friendly, and if that says anything about you then, heh." Even with all of her training Saness's face is soft, tender cheeks squishing firm when she smiles. It doesn't stretch like Grinmaww's or Ringleader's. "How old do clowns normally take on a patron?"

xxforsaken-angelxx > The magic here *was* different from magic elsewhere, but mostly in how certain the clowns were of its mechanics. Magic was considered an action, a movement of energy. It wasn't something just sitting around in people willy nilly, in their minds. Without something actively magical lying around, there was nothing he was attuned to sense.

> His face softened a little at her compliment, and a small "Aww" slipped out before he could think it through.

"It uh, depends though. Six is when most people really start socializin' online, and that's a big factor for decidin' to participate in the faith. So seven-ish is the most common for gettin' serious with contactin' things, as far as I know."

chimericarchitect > A little 'o,' either of interest or surprise, anoints her.

"Did you meet them before you met any other clowns or joined the faith then?"

xxforsaken-angelxx > His eyebrows raise a little.

"Before I met any other clowns, yeah. But I was pretty set on being involved since I could read what I had about it."

chimericarchitect "Did I ask something strange? Sorry."

> Saness tries to play it cool, another pretty flash of a somewhat sheepish smile, but she is a weenie and the lift of Grinmaww's eyebrows causes her to fret a secret amount.

xxforsaken-angelxx > He tries to look reassuring. Or as reassuring as a much taller goth clown can.

"Nah. Just haven't had anybody ask that. Nobody really asks an heir how they started, y'know?"

chimericarchitect > It works, she's as easily reassured as she is unsettled. Intent is always WAY more important than appearances to little ol' Saness. She tilts her head, birdlike. Why *wouldn't* anyone ask?

"Well... How *did* you start?"

xxforsaken-angelxx > Eridan stews on that for a second, digging through his memories of his old swamp hive for the answer he was looking for. Then, when he found it, he very seriously said:

"Clown grubby books."

chimericarchitect > Her mouth opens, and then it closes. She considers this. Raises a finger. Opens her mouth again with the sound of an H turning to a W, then closes it again. A hum. The finger lowers.

xxforsaken-angelxx > He watches her flounder, and provides nothing. There's a smile in his eyes. Specifically a :o)

chimericarchitect > It ends with her giggling, one arm crossing her front to rub at the other. Her general demeanor has an air of vulnerability at the shift, gentle and earnest in both the way she speaks and the way she looks at him, smiling soft as a peach. Saness's eyes still gleam to an unnatural degree, the ever-present predator, but she's about as scary as a snail covered in dew drops.

"Sorry, that sounds really cute Grinmaww... Were they pop-up books? I hope you had a pop-up book, I have a little collection of those, I think they're very charming..."

xxforsaken-angelxx > He ends up laughing back at her, crossing his arms and actually smiling a little. She's so cute? She's so cute. Why does everything happen so much.

"Of course they were pop-up books. Like just one of 'em but what kinda church would we be if the grubby book wasn't a pop-up one. That'd be bullshit."

chimericarchitect > Her smile widens eagerly, the rubbing arm stopping in more the fashion of a half-formed self-hug.

"I wish I could read them. Obviously it inspired little you? You're here and all, and you seem happy to."

xxforsaken-angelxx "I sure am. Love this place, always have."

> He glances at one of his bookshelves in particular, scanning for a particular spot and then stammering.

"I uh- I still have the pop-up one. Like just a newer copy, lying around. You could, uh...I'd let you borrow it, for as long as you have the tubes, if you want. It's not like it has anything too secret."

chimericarchitect > Saness covers her mouth when she starts laughing this time, both hands. It lasts a good moment, eyes scrunched up with a fond sort of mirth once more. She's been charmed, how dare he. Like really, how dare he. This isn't the troll she made this trip to make friends with!

> And yet, she can't say she minds the direction this is going. Not one bit. What a good place this must be with leadership like this.

> She lowers her hands to rib-height, curled into loose and amicable fists.

"Really?" She pauses to nibble her lower lip, literally biting back another short string of giggles. "If you don't mind, I'd very much like that. Really."

xxforsaken-angelxx > Phththhghbhbhb, goes the clown. There's indignant hand waving and everything. He's trying to be NICE and she has the AUDACITY to like. Handle it in a playful friendly way. Rude.

"I don't mind at all, just lemme fuckin-"

> He strides over to the bookshelf in question, pulling out the thick little book from the spot it's been tucked away in, among serious magical tomes.

> The cover has a generic looking purpleblood wriggler, notably un-goth. They're curled up against a sheeplike lusus in a cool-toned forest scene, watching a glittery butterfly float overhead. A gold whimsical font proclaims that "Magic is Everywhere!"

> He shows her this for a second, then places it next to the other things she came here for.

chimericarchitect > Look at this guy. What a guy! A guy who keeps a copy of his wrigglerhood  pop-up book in his block! A guy that would lend it to a near-stranger with a smile! A guy that bends and breaks the rules to do whatever is best or most interesting! A guy that doesn't get annoyed when he makes other people laugh! A guy with a really impressive propeller hand dance!

"What, you aren't going to flip through it with me? Don't you want to take a trip down memory lane with your new friend~?"

> Saness flounces along in Grinmaww's wake, leaning around him to rappa-tap a dance of her claws on the cover before he can fully rid himself of the book. She no longer minds the increased density of his aura by proximity, having decided that yes, they are friends now. It's a mostly-sincere question carried on a teasing tone that leaves him room to turn her down without anything getting awkward; he can brush her off as playing or he can take her seriously and crack open the book, and neither answer would be wrong.

xxforsaken-angelxx > Her hands get lightly swatted away. Bap, bap bap. It's kind of fortunate that he has a boyfriend now and everything, otherwise he'd still be terribly unused to people just...approaching him.

"Look, if I'm gonna give this thing to my 'new friend~'," he says, mimicking her badly, "Then I want you to enjoy this the proper way, which is all curled up at hive or whatever. It's the cozy kind of wriggler book. Don't at me."

chimericarchitect > Saness accepts her defeat with wiggly fingers, politely stepping back out of the range of his personal space. She is a self-satisfied creature.

"Cozy wriggler book, you've got it."

> She stuffs her mitts back into her pockets (all better, no touchy) and resumes rocking from heel to toe, watching Grinmaww with interest.

"I have so many more questions for you, but like, I realize this wasn't supposed to be a social visit and you are a very busy troll." Gotta check in. Gotta give him an out.

xxforsaken-angelxx > He settles back into leaning up against his desk, all casual like. But clearly with his feathers playfully ruffled. If it weren't for the paint there'd probably be a bit of a blush...which Saness might can guess anyways, with how much time she spends with clowns.

"Nah, I don't mind. Once I'm off work it's not like there's anything I'm supposed to be doin'."

> That and he's really enjoying her company. But he can't just like, say those words out loud, right?

chimericarchitect > That's enough of an invitation for her! Beaming, Saness makes an invisible 'desk' out of her psi and leans back against it, copying him like the silliest roly-poly.

"Great! You're even cooler than I'd hoped, I like talking to you."

> Apparently she can just say whatever the fuck she wants, unabashed while in her element. A single clap!

"Tell me about your lusus!"

xxforsaken-angelxx > There's clear amusement in her parroting, but also...a lack of questioning how the fuck she's doing that. Miming is a pretty common skill around here, after all.

"A goat? But like, a fish goat. An angler fish goat. Real big fucker that'd go around the swamp eating basically anything."

> There was a bit of disdain in his voice. It's fairly obvious that he didn't have a *great* opinion of his goat figure.  

"Think I gotta pass that one back at you, though. What was your lusus like?"

chimericarchitect "Uh, well..."

> She would be more phased by having bonked so clumsily into the Makara-standard experience of bad wriggler-lusus relations, but Grinmaww just asked a bit of a tricky question. It's obvious that Saness has to really consider how to answer this; for a moment she even looks off to the side, brow pinched.

"I don't really remember my lusus. I had a guardian, and she was a troll."

> The "sort of" that follows is said lower. How does one smoothly segway into 'I have amnesia and also the troll that looked after me when I came-to was actually some kind of life-force golem'? The answer is, you don't. You just don't.

xxforsaken-angelxx > Obviously there's curiosity that arises from that 'sort of.' Like, sort of a troll or sort of a guardian? It's an easy follow-up, and one he doesn't take. Instead, he gives her a somewhat sympathetic look.  

"You don't gotta talk about it if you don't want to."

> It's said both sincerely and flatly. He's not effected by whatever emotions she has around the subject, but is okay with them. No judgement, but lots of instinctual professionalism.

chimericarchitect "R-right..."

> The flat tone doesn't feel like it fits with the sympathetic look. Saness does not thrive in professional or formal environments, and even the gentle stiffness is enough for her to trip and flounder over. What is she *supposed* to say? Is this one of those secret codeword things people do when they like someone and want to be polite, but don't actually want to hear what they have to say?

> And besides... *Does* she want to talk about it? It's reflex to say 'no she doesn't,' and that coupled with the above is enough to sway her decision.

"I don't believe I ever got around to asking. Are limebloods extinct in this timeline?"

xxforsaken-angelxx > He *would* be interested, but he's not... supposed to be. Being a boss has it's tolls, one of them happening to be that he has a firm habit of not prying too hard. Any piece of extra information is something that can trip up the works of Imperial bureaucracy.

> So she takes her out and he lets it be, moving on to answering her next question as if nothing happened.

"Yeah, they are. Though the real dock against you is the fact that you don't have paperwork for existin' here. Like, you could go all hemo-anon or whatever an not stand out, but not havin' a travel record would get you in trouble real quick."

chimericarchitect > She's quick to focus on this new topic, grasping at it a bit like a life raft. It was one little hiccup, everything is fiiiiine.

"Really? Travel record? ...I implanted an identity to assume on an Earth once so that I could open a bank account and a few other things, but like, I imagine something like that might be a bit more difficult in this timeline. Earth is just... Not very savvy. Then again, on a standard Alternia, there are LOTS of available identities to assume, trolls die super constantly on the ground..."

> Grim thoughts are grim, and Saness makes a face. This line of thought isn't pleasant, and she isn't neutral about it, no matter how plainly she likes to talk about it.

"Who even checks for those? Everyone I pass in the hall? Do you have to confirm your I.D. at every doorway?"

xxforsaken-angelxx > Eridan points up towards the ceiling and gestures around.

"Cameras. There aren't any in here, but they're pretty much everywhere else. Anyone out of place would get spotted immediately, an' then you'd get flagged down for some questions."

> There's an attempt to not make the word "questions" in that sound ominous. An attempt. But the eyes of the Hydromatic were in fact everywhere.

chimericarchitect "Oh, so the 'travel records' are digital, and Hydromatic can identify people and locate aforementioned records on the spot, and if something doesn't line up, then yadda yadda? Or do you mean, Hydromatic would send security after me or whoever else walked mysteriously out of a closet because they're just *that aware* of every single familiar face and *that aware* of who has gone where? Because, I've got-"

> Saness grabs for her wallet chain, pulling the end of it out of her back pocket. It's definitely still not attached to a wallet; it's attached to a retro sylladex!

"I've got..."

> Operating this thing is not efficient. She's still flipping through it... There's a reason technology moved on without this little pocket-lunk.

"I've got this amulet, it was a gift. A disguise amulet..."

> Fwip fwip fwip... She just wants to show him a neat trick, man... Why does this have to be so har-AHA!!

> With a declaration of triumph, she retrieves a very simple locket on a very simple chain, proudly holding it aloft and grinning mischief at Grinmaww.

xxforsaken-angelxx > He just...lets her. He's the one with an even more old-fashioned looking computer sitting behind him. But he has no idea what exactly a 'disguise amulet' implies. Like, it *feels* magic, but there's a lot of extents that thing could go to. Instead, he just answers her questions.

"It's like a facial recognition system, just with an actual pair of eyes as a step in the process. If you're authorized to be on board here, and also to be in whatever rooms you're goin' in, then everything's fine, mostly."

chimericarchitect > Saness nods along, but she only half-cares about the answer to her question. It's not like she's going to be skulking about on the ship.

"Okay, so, check this out. Do you have any printed photos? Small ones, or ones you don't mind being folded? Magazine cutouts count, it'd just be cooler if it's someone that you recognize from this timeline rather than whoever I have in my pocket."

xxforsaken-angelxx "Uh-"

> Now it's his turn to awkwardly fumble around for something. He turns to start going through his desk drawer, pushing around this and that. There was a lot in the damn things. A few pipes, art supplies, spare papers, weed...

> Eventually he found a photo tucked away amongst it all, and handed it over.

> It's a picture that was only able to print halfway for some reason or another, leaving only one person in the image. Said person is Nymede, the Hydromatic's lead IT specialist. She was in an open shoulder top and hot pants and fishnets, with big fuzzy legwarmers. Her face was half obscured by a gas mask, and she had bright purple and fuchsia hair extensions.

> She was...probably in the helmsblock, or near it, there was biowire visible behind her, but there was no sign of Hydromatic themselves.

chimericarchitect > Is it void nonsense? A lack of ink? Some sort of printer malfunction? A certain helm being fussy about their picture being taken and purposely botching the job? The world may never know, and further, the world is unconcerned. Saness accepts the photo and gleefully pops open the locket. There was already a photo inside - one of Saness that has been color-edited to have black hair and ordinary teal eyes - that she hastily replaces with the photo of this very Fashion(tm) clown person. She gives it a playful jostle once it's closed away.

"Now, hang on, this is the cool part-"

> The moment she slips the locket over her head, Saness is no longer standing in the room. Instead, in every physically perceivable way, Nymede has replaced her. Eeach visible detail is accurate to the picture, and Saness-as-Nymede gives a little twirl.

"Tadaaa...!"

> It doesn't alter her voice, unfortunately, and Saness still sounds like herself. She moves like herself too, despite whatever change in height there may be, fluffy legwarmers flouncing realistically to match.

xxforsaken-angelxx "Wow what the fuck."

> That was. Perhaps less enthused sounding than he intended, and he cracks up the second after that leaves his mouth.

"Man, what the *fuck*-"

>  It is perhaps somewhat alarming to see a perfect clone of your friend, even if you think it's fucking hilarious. Boy is it realistic, though. He saw Nymede just tonight, and he wouldn't have thought twice if she'd been able to mimic her voice. Scary, but incredibly impressive!

chimericarchitect "Isn't it neat? It's basically a hologram. The projection is magic and it has the most basic of shells to give an amount of resistance when touched, but if you pressed against it you would sink through until you touched me. When used to mimic smaller things, the parts that hang out turn completely invisible, but can still knock into things if you aren't careful."

> While she talks Saness is wafting Nymede's arm back and forth, looking it over herself. She has back some of the same energy she came in with, the excitable quickness to the way she carries her borrowed form bleeding into how quickly she talks.

> She pauses only a moment, snapping her attention from Nymede's arm to Grinmaww's face. There's more she wants to say and show him, but she's not the type to sprint on ahead without someone.

xxforsaken-angelxx > He's following along, mostly, the way someone tends to when they're fascinated by something they don't *really* understand. Holograms were a thing in common use here, hard light was something he understood in theory, using magic to create tech-like results was...imaginable, at least?

> Which amounted as far as it being conceivable, and him having no idea how the fuck something like that would actually be made. Miracles, man.

"Neat is a real fuckin' understatement for that."

chimericarchitect > She chuckles and goes to remove the locket, zooping back to her regular appearance with a sideways flicker as soon as the chain is off her neck.

"You can even disguise things as people, or people as things, or things as other things..."

> Saness looks around the room for an easy target that doesn't look like something personal or sensitive, something she could feasibly loop the chain around.

"...and you can keep the chain on the object you want to disguise while keeping the locket somewhere else, it will continue to function so long as neither are destroyed..."

xxforsaken-angelxx > There are, frankly, a lot of Things in this room, so there's a lot of potential targets. There's several large quartz samples of different colors that could easily have the locket wrapped around, or some of his jars of common herbs like rosemary and thyme. Or for something even safer looking, she could nab a big black candle.

> That last part is what really surprised him, though. The parts could work separately? The locket didn't have to be on the chain? It wasn't just the locket that did the thing? How the FUCK did this thing WORK?

chimericarchitect > Badda-boom, she slips the locket off of the chain and wraps the pretty metal in a loose cascade over an unsuspecting candle. Nymede appears where it was, but nearly completely physically static. If the candle was lit, she'll be wobbling her head around in a way that could be considered eerie, mimicking the flames with the limitations of hair and a neck.

> What's more, a candle is much smaller than a person, and... the projection seems to shiver and warp a lot like it is strained, glitching in a way that Nymede *definitely should not be moving* in. Saness seems to find these wild distortions and unnatural behaviors to be entirely hilarious, pointing up at her and giving the whole thing a very good laugh.

xxforsaken-angelxx > It was not lit, just sitting around waiting for use. But that only mitigated the weirdness of this somewhat. Like, here was one of his best friends, in lifelike form, magically superimposed over a candle when she really shouldn't be. The whole thing wibbled around with the uncanniness of a wax figure and the function of spaghetti code.  

> He also thought it was fucking hilarious, and laughed with her.

chimericarchitect > They'll likely spend a moment in shared laughter before Saness reaches into the illusion to fumble around and remove the chain. As before, Nymede stretches sideways and zlorps out of existence.

> Saness is still a bit breathy with laughter when she speaks.

"See, that's... I can be anyone, or anything, except maybe - pppbb - a candle, or a spoon, haha!"

xxforsaken-angelxx "That's fuckin' mindbogglin' to me. But impressive as long as you're not tryin' to dodge the guards with bobblehead candle clowns."

> He shakes his head, still giggling a bit. What a time to be alive and in charge of this joint.  

"I've been doin' magic for a long ass time an' I've never gotten to see shit like that.

chimericarchitect > A bit more laughter and apparently show-and-tell is over, because Saness is putting her magic tool back into her sylladex - but she courteously remembers to take out the picture and offer it back toward Grinmaww on an open palm.

"The multiverse is a vast place and... I guess I've seen a lot of things!"

> Actually, it was talking to Pierce before that really put it into perspective. She's a veteran of mystery...

xxforsaken-angelxx > The picture gets placed back roughly where it was before, in one of his desk drawers. Possibly not even the same desk drawer? There are only so many things that can be in his goth mind at one time.

"Guess so," he says. "And guess I haven't seen much at all."

> Which was solely exciting to him, really. There was nothing he loved more than learning about the way everything flowed along in the universe. All a vast *multi*verse meant was he never had to stop.

chimericarchitect > Prrp! Saness proceeds to brush herself down for reasons unknown, satisfied with his response. There is a threshold here that needs to be respected, and unlike some of her friends, she's going to try and reel it in before crossing it.

"There are a lot of things I could show you, but I think maybe that's enough for a first meeting. I may not be the most vibrant or interesting tour guide, but I am a willing and attentive one!"

xxforsaken-angelxx > There's a small scoff at that second part, immediately.

"You're plenty vibrant. I do think we're good on the touring for now though, yeah."

> His hand creeps a little towards the collection of things he's supposed to be passing along to her. It's that business instinct again.

chimericarchitect > That was? A compliment? Yeah, no, it's cool. It's COOL. She sure hopes it's a compliment and not some sign that she overwhelmed him though, but if it is then man, it sure does sound like Grinmaww is completely clueless, he should meet her friends, *they're* the vibrant ones... And probably also very literally insane.

> She doesn't fuss when he moves them toward the end of their visit, quirky in her lopsided-smile sort of way. Saness rocks on her toes with her hands jammed deep into her pockets. She'll wait politely for him to gather himself up and bring this meeting to a close; it is his place, after all. Grinmaww is the floor master.

xxforsaken-angelxx > The look he gives her seems to support the compliment theory... But a moment later he's distracted. No objection, time to give her the things. The picture book first, and then the two psychic tube-y things. They're neatly labeled with label machine stickers, one from Pierce and one from Grinmaww.

> They actually came out pretty distinct looking. Both of the glow bits are lit a similar shade of purple, but Grinmaww's is...actually a good bit fainter. He's never really had any other chances to compare himself, though, so it doesn't even strike him as odd. Pierce is just good at shit like this, obviously.

chimericarchitect > Her hands are freed from her pockets! In order! To accept a darling pop-up book! And the actual tools she came for!

"Thanks so much for being such a good sport. I'll get the bracers and your cozy grubby book back to you as soon as I've finished!"

> They disappear from her palms, slorped up by her sylladex like so much loose spaghetti.

"It will take me a little longer than normal to complete these though, as I'm uh, a little bit preoccupied back at hive."

xxforsaken-angelxx > He shrugs, and...smiles just a little. Why must she be so goddamn pleasant all the time always.

"That's fine. Ain't like there's any rush anyways. Just get 'em back when you can."

> There's a moment of realization on his face when he remembers that she's just going to like...zap out of herself out of here. And not use a door. Which means that normal farewell dialogue cues weren't going to happen.

"It was uh, real nice seein' you an' all man."

chimericarchitect > Saness wouldn't know a normal dialogue cue if it bit her full on the bulge, farewell or otherwise.

"Somenight we'll have to figure out how to swap tours for realsies!"

> Rather than saying goodbye or returning the compliment like a civilized or well-adjusted troll, she gives her new friend a big smile and an even bigger dwarpy salute, turning on her heel for dramatic effect as the crackly light consumes her once more.

> Just like that, she is gone.