#julian route spoilers

[t-toxic-waste]

Its been almost two years and I still cannot get over this

[leighsartworks216]

"Are you missing something?" (Memories)

Asra: "Me? What would I be missing?"

[thisfuckingdork]

[nebbyy]

Asra Alnazar x reader - Intimacy before and after

Summary: just some headcanons that came to my mind about Asra<3

Warning: smuttt, but nothing crazy tho, there are mostly mentions or hints of smut, nothing specifically described (it’s mostly just angst tbh). There are also SPOILERS for Asra’s route and the Arcana plot in general, so if you haven’t finished playing it I suggest you don’t read this post. 

A/N: just to specify, reader is wrote as non-binary:) Also, this is the first smuttish thing I write, so feedbacks and advices are very much welcome<3<3

Asra has always been a passionate lover. It’s just the way he is, his body can’t help but follow the intensity of feelings his soul feels, and transfer it from the level of the soul to the level of the body

When he first met you, it was almost as if a wave washed over him, depriving him of balance, and he could find it once again in the feeling of you and your body, pressed against him

Passion mixes with intensity and haste the first times the two of you have sex. His every movement is a physical demonstration of  just how deep, how powerful, his feelings for you are

Once the two of you are done, you’re left breathless, legs shaking and sore, sweat covering your body, tears of pleasure running down your cheeks. You’re spent in the best way possible

It starts to change during the beginning of the Red Plague. The deep empathy you feel for the people dying in the streets, the desire to do something to help, takes all your desires to feel pleasure (or anything joyful for that matter), replacing it with the urge to help as many as you can

You start growing distant from each other, the atmosphere in the shop becomes tense, the interactions between you and Asra are short and almost void of any emotion. You start visiting the castle more often, volunteering to help doctor Devorak in finding a cure for this Plague. It comes without say that sex wasn’t really in neither of your minds

And it only becomes worse after your death. Asra feels that same wave washing over him, but this time he doesn’t welcome the feeling of it. It make feel lost, knowing that the very person he used to hold on to, the only one that made him forget the rest of the world, and just give into the pleasure the wave brought

This wave brings grief, desperation. Hell, it even brings hallucinations to some point. He can’t make out what’s real and what’s fake, he can’t discern when he’s dreaming and when he’s awake

It’s at this point that his situationship with Julian starts. We all know just how toxic it was, for the both of them. But Julian needed to feel love in these dreadful times, and Asra needed to feel that same feeling of grounding to save him from the power of that wave

It wasn’t the same as you, he knew that very well. Julian couldn’t fill the void of love Asra felt, he could only satisfy his carnal desires, give him that brief high that, for just a moment, made him forget everything that was happening in his life, his losses, his mistakes, his regrets

But not much time passes before that high becomes unsatisfying, and the guilt of what he’s doing takes over him. How can he do this with Julian, when all he’s thinking of is you? How can he deem himself worthy of having you once again in his arms, when instead of keeping the void you left empty, awaiting for your return, he filled it with someone else, someone not even comparable to you in his eyes?

That’s when the weird relationship between Asra and Julian ends, when Asra conveys all his energies and time in finding a way to get you back

At first, there was nothing in his mind when it came to you other than gratitude to have you back along with the utmost care to tend to you, to comfort you when you were in pain or scared at whatever appeared new to you after you came back. Your mind was at the same level as one of a child, there was no desire in Asra other than to have you back as you were

As time goes by, and you regain the aspects of the person you once were, that desire, that wave of passion, starts to awaken once again in him

And then after years of longing for the feeling of you’re touch, of your body pressed against him, he once again can feel that same feeling of euphoria once your bodies merge once again. Only that this time, his demeanor has changed. There’s a different kind of intensity in his actions

There’s not the feverish haste in his movements anymore; instead, he takes his sweet time kissing you, caressing your body, worshipping you as if you were some sort of deity. He holds you as if you’d disappear in his arms if he loosens his grip too much

His thrusts are slow and deep, making that wave of pleasure that’s in him fall into you too. It makes you feel a deeper kind of pleasure, one with such forse that it has you detached from reality once you reach your high, it knocks the breath out of your lungs, and it makes you only desire to hold Asra closer, to have him deeper inside you. You almost wish you could become one

There are still times where you have fast, rough sex, one that ends quickly and leaves you both breathless and spent. But you just prefer to feel that deeper connection, the one that has you longing for more, that morphs into endless hours of just holding each other. It makes you both feel as if time has stopped, and there’s no one else in the world but you two

[iliveforyouilongforyouvesuvia]

There's something I don't understand in Julian's route SPOILER ALERT

When Julian was force fed a plague beetle and got locked in the dungeon to find a cure. Why did he have asra's magic book with him? He doesn't belive in magic and he didn't get visions of the hanged man until he was almost dying. How did he know asra's book had information about the visions he saw before he even got them? I might have misunderstood the whole thing but if not I really would like to read ur opinion of this!

Hi friend! Here's my main guess, and a disclaimer XD

When it comes to the Arcana timeline and lore, truthfully, there's so many inconsistencies and revisions that it's not exactly the kind of plot I'd try to hold any water with. That's without the added complication of six different routes with two endings each, giving us 12 different canons for one story, and a main character written so vaguely that they could be almost any reader. Personally, I find it charming, but for people who like a watertight plot and intricate world building, it can get (understandably!) very frustrating.

To answer your question though, Julian having a magic book in his office starts to make a little more sense in the context of two key parts of his character journey: 1, the Julian we meet in the prologue is also missing memories, and 2, Julian's prejudice against magic doesn't go as far as claiming it isn't real, rather, he belittles it in an attempt to be less afraid of it.

Julian doesn't yet remember the events leading up to the masquerade when the magic book is found in his office - which means he also doesn't necessarily remember the extent to which he was involved with Asra and their search to bring MC back. The book itself, with the mark of magic on it, is implied to have information on it about Patron deals. Asra would have used to it come up with their plan to bring MC back, which means Julian likely wouldn't have been able to take it until Asra was done with it.

This also means that Julian would have been around Asra for some time at that point (long enough to form the close friendship between them and Nadia) and would have seen enough of Asra's magic research to know that it was real, powerful, and effective - and maybe an approach to curing the plague that he'd been avoiding. With source of the plague being Lucio's deals with the Devil (and others), Julian already had many of the puzzle pieces he needed to solve it and both the intelligence and drive to push through.

While the early-route Julian without his memories wouldn't go near magic and would call it silly, late-route Julian with his memories would absolutely borrow a magic book if he had reason to believe it held answers about the plague. Personally, I think that if he'd had the time to do so, Julian would have figured it out eventually on his own without contracting the plague and the near-death experience that let him interact with the Hanged Man. Being infected and confined accelerated the process by removing any other priorities he would've had and opening him to receiving help from a Patron.

The question it leaves me asking, though, is why Lucio felt the need to forcefully infect and imprison his top doctor when he already had everything in place to get a new body. Is it a testament to how cruel and twisted he could get pre-ghost form? Or was it at someone else's request, much like Aisha and Salim's imprisonment seventeen years earlier?

[deathlooksgoodonyou-if]

How Dylan relationship works with a male!Jules if there will be homo angst in the work?

Because the homo angst comes from what the mc thinks of Jules dating dylan. You don't know what is going through Julian's mind when he dates dylan. You don't know what goes throught Juliet's mind when she dates dylan.

I can't tell exactly how the route will play out because ahem... spoilers. But I'll clear things up a little because I know I will be hit with his question again, haha.

Juliet and Julian are the same person but still different. The way they think and express themselves— especially their body language— is very different. Juliet may exude the same air of confidence and relaxed state of being as Julian but her every response, in reality, is meticulously crafted. While Julian is raw and will scream till his throat is dry and his tongue burns— till he can exist loud enough, Juliet will swallow back the profanities she wants to hurl. Her irritation seeps into the narrowing of her gaze, the tightening of her lips and the coldness of her response. They may be the same person but the way they express themselves varies and that includes their sexuality. Julian won't hesitate to bluntly flirt with a male!mc in public. It's just lighthearted teasing. Juliet's romance is more subtle. It's in the hushed whispers, stolen gazes and secretive smiles from across the room. Hell, in fact, some scenes take place in a completely different setting depending on whether you are playing with a male!Jules or female!Jules. The prime reason for Jules not getting into a relationship with the mc will always be the same. (You'll hear it from their lips on your own) Mc's gender may throw Jules off but never to the point it could make them uneasy. The homo angst comes from what goes inside mc's mind. Jules will always have a gay awakening— either through the mc or dylan lol.

I...could have made a counterpart of dylan. I even had her name in mind. Delilah. But I...don't know. I didn't want to bend things just to fit the narrative and hence, Julian was born. Julian who is Juliet and yet so vastly different.

[longbobmckenzie]

Too Hot to Handle 3: Episodes 1-3 Thoughts

We're back, bitches.

And as always, I have thoughts.

First off, the customization. It was fine. I like the hair options and that there are additional prosthetics/CGMs, but the rest of it felt like the same thing all over again and it took me a good 10 minutes to come up with someone I was relatively happy with but not thrilled with. Also the smiles are still creepy but at least we get to preview them this time

I love being a bombshell as it adds something fresh and means I didn't have to sit through the opening where everyone comes in because that takes soooo long sometimes (maybe next time we're an OG we can be one of the last to arrive?)

FREE PASS!!! Buuut all we got was some kisses and making out? Like come on. They should've either said we get a free kiss on the date or at least let us be extra naughty

I also like that we got to customize the LI we took out on the date and the customizations were permanent instead of limited to during the date

I picked Taz. I gave him a beard and manbun, and now he looks like Marshall 🤣 I have a type, okay?

I typically like to whore around during my first playthrough but after picking Jirayu for the tour and Mattias for something else (clearly not memorable since I don't remember what it was), I just keep gravitating back to Taz. Him being stuck-up about the food on the date kinda sucked but then he said he liked that I wasn't just saying stuff based on what he likes and he relaxed and became a lot more fun and then we made out and I shared a bed with him and yeaaahhh I like him. So I've been picking him every option ever since

But that doesn't mean I'm not already dying to see who comes in as bombshells

As for the other LIs, the biggest disappointment to me is probably that... WHERE ARE THEY?!?! If you don't pick them for scenes, they're almost non-existent. I've seen Bear more than I've seen Carmen or Beatriz. I'd love for them to be more integrated into the storyline, which I think S2 did a great job of. That said, once we lock in to our LIs I'm sure we'll see more, but how am I supposed to get to know these people if I never see them and don't want to choose them over Taz?

That brings us to the non-romanceable (yet) characters. We know from the achievements that there are 3 achievements for a BFF-to-lovers route, so I guess 3 of them will be possible endgames (not sure if this also includes any future bombshells or if it's just from the 4 OGs). Anyway, so far... I'm not liking them. Victoria's a fugly bitch (spoiler: good riddance to her), Sean is cartoonishly annoying (he gives me Felix vibes but I also wonder if they're trying to make him like Hamish), and I'm just not vibing with Julian or Giselle as friends, let alone future love interests. And the problem with that is that they're the ones constantly being pushed in my face instead of the other LIs, which is just making me more annoyed with them. Again, I think S2 did really well with this, so hopefully it changes. But otherwise, ugh.

Back to Taz - I love that we have such amazing chemistry and he's willing to break rules with me, and it's all just purely physical at this point. Like yeah, we've talked a bit about ourselves too and expressed an interest in getting to know each other, but I don't feel like either of us are emotionally invested yet and I love that - because this is THTH, not Love Island. We're not here for love, we're here for sex. I don't wanna feel after a day that my LI is already half in love with me. There's plenty of time for that

Is it just me, or have there been a lot of potential rule breaks already? I've only been in there a couple days and I've already spent so much money - lots of heavy petting and manual gratification with Taz so far, plus kissing

I'm so getting kicked out 🤣

I'm intrigued to see more of Bad Lana and how that plays out - I've only seen the first episode of the new season of the show, so it'll be interesting to see how they do it in the game

another HUGE plus: less time in the beach hut!! They're not doing a full chapter of beach hut confessionals anymore, just tacking on a bit to the start of one of the chapters, and I LOVE that change. it also means we get more actual game time!

There's a threesome in the achievements. I'm ready.

Anyway, overall I think I preferred the start of S2 (I remember being pretty blown away by the potential and the branching), but this is still a good start and I'm excited for the season. I'm ready for bombshells, and I'm definitely gonna play a 2nd profile to see what Jirayu is all about because I'm intrigued by him. And I wanna be messy on one route and more loyal on another, because I love seeing all the branching when you play both ways!

[thearcanarevival]

SO SO SO, This is Venix, my Arcana oc. (Inspiration from a Phoenix, rising from the ashes) I originally made them for Lucio's route (i am failing at that btw 👍 have only drawn them with Julian) currently they mean everything to me. This was their original outfit, but I dont like it as much anymore so im looking to change it (I have an idea rn, which is seen kinda in the Julian Drawings)

-The paragraph above and artwork below was submitted by erosonline. Go check them out!

The Arcana Discussion

Absolutely love what you have going on! I also think there name is really cool. Keep it up!

This is them in their Masquerade outfit!

And I wanted to draw Julian, and I wanted to draw my oc, so all of these happened at once (they multiply if you dont look at them)

And these ones are me being hella inspired by a video game cosmetic recently (lucio reversed spoilers ahead ig?)

Feel free to give your opinion on this artwork in the comments. Also, give me your headcanons, theories, fanart, and so much more.

[spicypepperflakesss]

💚 Post-Route Muriel Headcanons | My Masterlist

How Muriel and Julian Can Be Friends

Julian and Muriel can contend with one another for the best wildest/goriest injury story. Maybe even bond over it! (⁠.⁠ ⁠❛⁠ ⁠ᴗ⁠ ⁠❛⁠.⁠)

-This is for post upright Muriel route (beware of spoilers below) -I feel like there isn't enough platonic julian and muriel headcanons but I thought of a new one:

MC and Julian bond over a shared work history under the plague and having lost memories

Then, Muriel goes to therapy! With Nazali. He decided he wants to give connecting with people another shot.

Her challenge is to connect with Julian - since he's his best friend's boyfriend and MC's other good friend next to Asra

For a long time until the present day, he refuses to do that. But on the rare occasion he does, it's always an accident.

After some time Muriel becomes comfortable talking to close friends about the weirdest/goriest stories from his gladiator days.

Julian would walk in sometimes and it absolutely captures his attention. Out of everyone, only Julian actually relates.

Sometimes he even hypes Muriel up, earning a shy smile from Muriel when done right.

Other times, they become competitive. But even then, Muriel will find himself smiling, before quickly covering it with a cough and a nonchalant stare. It still makes the doctor secretly happy - like he's finally unlocked a small key to understanding their most difficult friend.

Until Muriel finishes his stories, and he puts back his walls up again.

So, sometimes, Julian might start his own story. Muriel doesn't really notice the doctor's intention and goes along with it

When either person is telling a story, the other person chimes in and validate each other's grievances in dealing with the gory side of fighting by expounding the other person's experience, making the other person feel heard.

Sometimes either of them might throw a joke in or two. And they would be the only two "laughing" (the most Julian got out of Muriel is a chuckle).

MC and Asra are usually the other two people in the room. They'll fall back and give them the floor, giving each other a knowing smile as they watch their significant others slowly become unlikely friends.

(Or look at each other with concern when Julian and Muriel laugh about someone's really gory injury a little too much)

------------------------- Hey, thanks for making it to the end! Enjoyed this? Check out my other Muriel stuff! :

My Muriel Masterlist

Previous | Next ||

[iridescent-solstice]

Spoiler for Asra's route below!! Read at your own risk

૮꒰˶  - ˕ -꒱ა

I like how the whole crowd will decide the fate of Asra and Julian after they get arrested (before the masquerade ball). . . AND THIS BIG BRAIN BELOVED WHITE-HAIRED MAGICIAN THAT HAS MAH HEART IS LIKE TELLING EVERYONE IN THE GIANT ASS COLISEUM THAT THE COUNT DIED CAUSE OF SOME SPOOKY MAGIC STUFF AND TRYING TO MAKE SOME DEAL WITH THE DEVIL . . . Sir you're gonna get hanged like i'm sorry, rlly trying to be on your side but everyone else thinks you're nuts and lost your marbles LMAOOO

[still-a-morosexual-help]

Part 2 of interesting Mechat routes [Part 1] there'll be vague spoilers but nothing major

13. "Oh my god, they were roommates" + "there's only one bed" trope except they fucking hate each other

14. "Just inherited a large manor from a distant English uncle who died under mysterious circumstances" MC Vs. "Butler, willing to do anything to protect the manor, and trying his best to mask how much he loathes his new employer under a thin veneer of politeness" LI

So many instances where you can't tell if they are gonna fuck or tear each other's throats out

Also there's this moment after MC bitch slaps him, that's like

MC: .....wait am i a sadist? Shitfuckshit I shouldn't have hit him

MC: I'm so sor-

MC:

MC:

MC: Is he a masochist?!!!

Edit: ohh this just spiralled straight into porn with a side of possible murder mystery

that being said MC has a strong "I may not like him or even trust him but only I can be a dick to him" instinct

Edit: I'm screaming they're so funny

MC: I'm going to act mean and domineering and borderline cruel because it's clear he doesn't want me here and it's clear he's hiding something about my uncle's death and this is the only way to push him into revealing secrets

LI: I'm going to throw my kink for being subservient to the point of insanity and keen for punishment in their face at any opportunity so that it'll scare them away and they don't get a chance to ruin this manor

MC&LI: oh no they're into this

Edit: both of these characters are insane. And no I'm not talking about the 24/7 BDSM part I mean they're genuinely unhinged. What do you mean his response to feeling jealousy is to lock the both of you in a tomb that'll seal shut in 30minutes after which you'll eventually die of dehydration within days and your response to that is to fuck about it instead of oh I don't know FORCING HIM TO OPEN IT AND GETTING THE FUCK OUT ASAP!!!????

15. Two doms trying to out dom each other. 24/7 grind-hustle culture stock market invester he/they dom LI Vs. MC who said bet.

16. Retired (?) God of Dreams running a magic coffee shop (the profile pic of one of the versions of this story looks lowkey like goth Julian Devorak (and he only looks like this here btw) and with 0 thought behind it I named my MC "Nel" for this route and then took a whole half an hour to remember my MC for Julian's route is named "Len" so magic? lucky coincidence?)

17. Adrenaline Junkie LI (the story doesn't really interest me but his Cruella de Vil looking ass is pretty enough to drag me along)

18. Giant muscular marshmellow soft shy excitable nonbinary butch

19. College group project -> poly relationship. The dynamic & chemistry between the three of them is so good .

also why do all of them have issues😭💀

20. Wildcard fantasy storybook pirate come to life x geography nerd MC who is the best combination of fiesty, anxious & shy/flustered getting kidnapped & cursed to be their navigator to the Bermuda triangle

[thesongbirdssonginvesuvia]

Musing On Lucio

So hey, this is me being unable to sleep until I put this down into words, so if you have no interest then this probably isn't for you, but since it's his birthday I have been thinking about Lucio a lot especially as it pertains to my AU that I am currently writing. Now Lucio doesn't feature in a lot of my work currently, not because I don't like him (because I really do I find him fascinating and an interesting character) but more because the three routes I'm weaving together are Asra's, Julian's, and Muriel's, all of which feature Lucio as the "villain" and essentially defeated in the end.

That being said I was thinking of ideas of how-to bring Lucio back and 'redeem' in such a way to make him a more friendly figure. My ideas range from a Lucio from another world who has seen the light and is already working on changing, (though if you have any ideas let me know) but all this thought about it has made me think on how the Songbirds would actually interact with Lucio once he is a friend.

Robin, I think would be the most patient with him, given Robin's dad kind of attitude. I have thought that if Robin hadn't ended up with Asra, Lucio would probably have been my second choice because I could see Robin's gentleness as a good foil to Lucio's attitude. I think Lucio, like Asra, would be good at bringing out Robin's courage as well. I had a story line a while back that had Lucio even teaching Robin sword fighting (though that story line isn't really being used anymore, though could make for a cute side story).

Sparrow is a tricky one as she doesn't take any guff from people, and Lucio would probably try to push back, which would probably make him see why Sparrow is called 'the guard dog'. She would probably stare him down enough to make him listen, though once she could see his better side, I bet she would ease up a little (just a bit). She probably would over time develop a friendship with him, talking about adventure stories over tea which Sparrow would convince him is good.

Lark is probably the hardest of all however, even though he has the lightest temperament. I think because most of early interaction with Lucio came from Muriel's Route, that (without giving too many spoilers for those who have not actually played it) is a rough one for Lucio being a villain. It takes Lark a long time to realize that this is not the same Lucio and that he can chance for the better. I have the joke in my head that Lark says, "Old Lucio is a guy with the same name as you (New Lucio), who looks similar, but your face is better" (New Lucio: *Smirking* "Damn Straight."). I think they would become good friends, and I imagine they would start writing music together, with Lark playing guitar and Lucio singing (he might actually have a nice voice if he wouldn't try to do anything crazy).

Anyways that's my musing on Lucio's birthday. Happy birthday Lucio from the Songbirds who have adopted you as their goat friend.

[leighsartworks216]

Death Bed

Julian Devorak x gn!Reader/Apprentice

I transcribed almost an entire chapter of Julain's route just for this 💀 I want the Apprentice to react more when they find out they died. Like, THEY DIED let them cry about it

Title from "death bed (ft. beabadoobee)" by Powfu

Warnings: angst, hurt/comfort, crying, mental breakdown, coming to terms with dying, death, spoilers for Julian's route

Word Count: 1,395

Masterlist

AO3

“So… um, so.” Julian shifts a book in line with the rest, fiddles with the fraying edge of the spine, and slides it back out to shift the order around some more. “Well, it worked. I met the Hanged Man, got the rest of my memories back, got my cure, and…” 

He scratches mindlessly at the pressed together pages, brow furrowing. It’s like he wants to look over, but knows doing so would make what he wants to say even harder.

“Listen, uh, just stay calm and listen to me, okay? I found out that… that…”

His mouth opens. Closes. Opens again, before he bites his lip.

You take in a quiet breath. “That you knew me… and I died?”

His head whips up in a flash. Wide eyes stare at you. “Wh… How did…? I was psyching myself up to tell you that and you already knew?”

You could almost laugh at his shock. At the look on his face.

But a waver at the back of your throat prevented anything as joyful as that from forming. You swallowed before saying, “I didn’t know. Not until today.”

He blinks cluelessly at you.

“I saw you, in the Hanged Man’s realm. I couldn’t call out to you, I couldn’t reach you, but… I heard everything.”

You can see the realization dawn on his face, in the way his eyes widen and soften with sympathy. “Are you… are you okay?”

Your mind spins.

Are you okay?

This morning, maybe you could say you were. Even as Julian was being carted away to be hanged, as his eyes gaze across the crowd and locked onto you. As his body fell out from under him. You could have bit your cheek, sucked it up for a moment more, clinging to the hope his plan would work.

You could watch him die, and still hold on just enough to reassure Portia that he would be okay.

But this?

Every time the thought reaches the forefront of your mind, your head spins. A headache presses at your temples, your stomach churns, your heart feels off-beat. How… How can you be okay?

You shake your head weakly, eyes falling from his face, vision unfocused as hot tears begin pooling too quickly to try stopping them. “No. I… no, I’m not.”

His words sound distant. All you’re aware of is his cool hand touching your shoulder, guiding you down to the ratty old cot taking up space in the small cell. The way his hands glide around you, pulling you into his chest.

And all at once, you finally break.

Harsh sobs shake you to your core as you hug him back. The fabric of his shirt becomes a prisoner in your tight grip, tugging desperately to pull him closer and closer.

His hand cups the back of your head, guiding your face to his neck. He whispers reassurances - mindless platitudes to try distracting your mind from the terrible truth to your missing memories. Kisses planted sweetly at your temple and hairline.

“Who-” You have to gasp for air. Your lungs burn with the next sob, especially as you try to stifle it down against his skin. “Who was I?”

He stiffens under you, and squeezes you tighter in his hold.

That person you used to be… You’d never know them. When at one time, all you knew was yourself, suddenly that rug has been ripped out from under you. Is who you are now- are you even you? Would your past self have become this? Were you them anymore? Did you share anything with them anymore?

And all those memories. All those days, all that time spent living just… gone. Did you used to think of your parents on holidays? Were you even close enough to them to think of them? Were they even alive? You know your shop belonged to your aunt, but you don’t even remember her anymore.

How many childhood memories bathed in golden nostalgia are lost now? How many friends did you used to have, now faded into obscurity?

God, friends. You tried so hard to be kind to all of the vendors at the market, but they all stared at you so warily. No matter what you tried, they were always on edge, always whispering behind your back. Even the baker had his moments of unease toward the beginning of your newest memories. Asra was the only friend you had. For so long. Who else had come before him?

And Julian! You’d known him! Worked as his apprentice! Were you friends then? Did you drink Salty Bitters at the Rowdy Raven together back then? Did you share secrets late in the night? Did you welcome him at work with a cup of coffee? Or did you drift through life back then, too? Keeping a practical distance between you both, staying professional, never anything deeper than that.

You press your face further into his shoulder. You can’t imagine it. You can’t imagine not being as close to Julian as you are now. All the adventures and laughter and love…

But you wish you could remember it. Just for a moment.

Julian brushes your hair back, humming a song out of tune by your ear. You wonder how long he’s been humming for, you didn’t even notice when it began. You focus on the melody, however butchered it may be from years of singing shanties with pirates. If you listen carefully, imagining what it should sound like, you think it may be a lullaby.

The more you listen, the more aware of your body you become. Your skin is warm where he rubs up and down your back. His other hand is gloveless, though you don’t know when he removed it. It tangles softly in your hair, scratching gently at your scalp, sending tingles that mix with your trembling body to form goosebumps along your arms.

His chest rumbles as he hums. You’re pressed close enough to feel it vibrate through you, too. When the song pauses and he inhales, you feel it, too. You can hear it by your ear, the sharp intake of breath.

You remember the sight of him dangling by the neck. You couldn’t tear your eyes away when they waited for him to die.

But he’s not dead now.

You bring a hand around to rest on his chest. He pauses briefly, head shifting as he tries to see what you’re doing, but he doesn’t completely stop. His skin isn’t cold as death, it’s just cool. Underneath, you can feel the powerful beating of his heart. Its steady rhythm is persistent.

Your tears slow, until the leftover drops stick to your eyelashes. Your body stops shaking with the force of your despair. His hand slows to a stop on your back, melody petering off to welcome the silence of the dungeon once more. He kisses your temple.

“Are you alright?” he whispers hesitantly.

Are you?

You take a deep breath. The lingering smell of coffee and the sea greets you.

You nod slightly. Your voice is crackly and raspy as you speak, fragile. “I think so.”

He lets you pull away when you’re ready. You can’t stand the thought of leaving too wide of a gap, though. So your hand remains on his chest, over his heart. There’s a kind understanding in his eye as he covers it with his own.

“I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you back then,” he apologizes. “You needed me and I wasn’t there. I failed you.”

You shake your head, cutting him off. “You’re here for me now.” You muster up a weak smile. “That’s what matters.”

His shoulders sag a little with relief. He lets go of your hand to cup your cheek, wiping away the drying tears with his thumb, before drawing you forward and kissing your forehead once more. It’s easy to close your eyes and sink into the affection. Knowing how close you have both been to dying for good, it feels precious. It is precious.

But it’s all too soon when he pulls away, brows taught with seriousness. Too many questions are left unanswered. Too many things hinge on Lucio not coming back. For as much as you want nothing more than to linger in stolen moments forever, it will have to wait.

You won’t let this plague come back.

You can’t.

[fallenlightsif]

Since the chapter is now public, I just need to share this here, not only on Patreon...

So, I may have said that before, but I'm a "one canon route" type of player. Which also means that no matter the amount of delicious ROs you create, I normally commit to one...

And ever since the very first posts about this game, I'm commited to Orion.

But then... E... E was tempting me more and more and more... And with the latest update... well it was too much. You're one of the veeeery few authors who made me create a second save just to romance a different character than my primary choice, because I just can't resist anymore. I can't even express just how much I love them. It obviously doesn't make me love Orion any less, but I just can't resist E. And I'll be honest, Julian is making it hard too - but for the time being I'm staying strong (we'll see if it lasts!).

Also, E's latest extra story on Patreon is pure delight and I live for that.

That's it. I just needed to gush about E... And now that I see my post, I actually didn't necessarily have to wait for the public release since it doesn't contain spoilers.......

Now that I think of it though, romancing E feels especially tragic somehow? At least with a crush existing before MC's "death" and having already chosen some romance oriented option by the time it happens. I mean, considering their struggles, and how they really thought THEY would die with the arrow incident and all that... it must be such a cruel twist of fate from their perspective that they survived but MC ends up dying shortly (I'm assuming) later...

There are multiple facets of E’s story that end up making a rather tragic story. Just consider the fact that they are a conjuror as well, and someone who hates their talents to boot.

E has been used as a pawn their entire life by their parents as an eldest child. They’ve gone along with it to spare their siblings. I’m so glad they’ve had a good reception from readers and can’t wait to share more of their story!

[nebbyy]

I JUST REALIZED SOMETHING

(this is a rant of mine that CONTAINS SPOILERS FOR ASRA'S ROUTE IN THE ARCANA, so read at your own risk)

So, Asra right? My first love interest in the game, the person that basically built my ideal type,.. him.

It is common knowledge in this fandom that his love for the MC is completely unending end unconditional, right?

Well, I might disagree.

This idea came to my mind a few days ago, and from then on I spent my days contemplating life in despair and depression at my realization.

Asra's love IS FUCKED UP and I think it is more of an addiction to the MC rather than pure, unconditional love.

Let me elaborate: first he loses his parents, then he finds Muriel but he still lives in fear of losing him every time he had to fight in the Arena, then he had you, who for about 6 years had stayed by his side, with no signs of leaving anytime soon.

He wanted you all to himself, the only thing that remained stable in his life. That is, until the plague. That's the time where the selfishness of the purpose of his actions really comes to light: he wants everything and everyone to be just as he wants.

I mean, let's face it, no matter how much he might have pleaded and begged you to come with him and leave the city, he still left you there, alone, risking your life,... just so that he could be safe. Screw where you were, he was sure that at the end of it all, you would've still been there, waiting for him.

Because out of all the people in his life, you were the only one that never left

But it all changes when Julian's letter reaches him, and he comes back to Vesuvia. And you're gone.

I really think that his grief was mostly due to the loss of something stable in his life, rather than the lost of the love of his life.

After all, it didn't take long for him to start a relationship with Julian, and I don't care if some might say that it's some sort of coping mechanism, if Asra was able to do it all while still working to get you back, hitting it with Julian knowing that he was gonna have you back soon... that's just fucked up.

Also, his protective tendencies when MC comes back are rather possessive in my opinion: he keeps you like a trophy inside the shop, while he keeps wandering around the world, fulfilling his own selfish desire to visit as much as he can, while still keeping you in your cozy place, inside the castle.

That is also the whole point of the Reversed Ending of his route, that he could consider his own happy ending: he has you, all to himself, forever.

I think that the best side of Asra comes out when you play the other routes, because he has to come to term with his own issues and with the fact that at this point he cannot keep you to himself anymore. And with time he'll come to realize that what he feels for you is more of a spiritual connection, probably thanks to your own aura and magic, rather than a real romantic connection.

That's it, thanks for coming to my ted talk babes

[trashcatgallade]

The fact that Muriel and Asra are canon in Nadia's route is my favorite thing ever actually I'm so happy about it. I like Asra and Julian as much as the next person but if I were to hypothetically die in a freak accident and leave Muriel behind I'd want Asra to take care of him for me so I'm thrilled by this information

[screenshot spoilers for Nadia's route beneath the cut]

YIPPEE I LIKE THEM!!