#jude and cocoa

[xxblairexxss]

Cookies!

Pairing : dad!Jude Bellingham x reader

Them : Angst, I think.

Word count : 2k

Jude had a bad day and it seemed like a cookie wasn’t enough to cheer him up.

I haven’t written in soooo long. Apologize for any mistakes. Might delete this one. I don’t know. Sorry! Should start writing more. 😔

Jude and you were highschool sweethearts. Back when eveyone thought you guys wouldn’t make it because kids in love? Yeah, who would have thought you guys could pull through.

But you did.

There were ups and downs especially at the beginning of his career. Those multiple rumors and gossips came flooding all at once and you went from a normal girl to someone who was known to have a famous boyfriend. They ven called you “the girl who hit the jackpot”.

Some even called you lucky.

A few months after your marriage, Jude and you were blessed with a little girl named Aaralyn. Jude was a perfect father figure to her though to be honest, her arrival wasn’t really align with the immense growth of his career but he managed to balance it all out.

But there were still ups and downs.

The small little hand was flipping through pages of pages from your baking cookbooks whilst her other hand kept on tapping on her chin. Her soft little hums filled through the air.

“Have you make up your mind, honey?” You asked whilst rummaging through the cupboards to take out every baking tools needed.

Jude had been feeling under the weather these days. He tried to hide it from you as he always did but you always catch on it. You knew him very well.

And so did Aaralyn.

Apparently, your little girl was fully aware of it too. Aaralyn woke up this morning and came up with an idea to bake cookies for Jude because it was her favourite and based on her logic, whatever foods that made her happy, should made others happy just as much.

“Mommy, we… bake choco cookies!”

You let out a cackle. “You flipped through the whole book just to decide with a basic one?”

“It’s Alyn’s favourite!” Her small little hands started patting on her chest with a proud expression written all over the face.

“Of course, baby. Can you let mommy see the ingredients, please?” You were about to pull the book closer to your side but your duaghter was quicker.

She snatched the book back with her lips jutting out. “Alyn can read!”

“Okay, read it out loud while mommy gather all of the ingredients, yeah?”

“This one says..powder!” Her little finger pointed to the first ingredient on the list.

“What kind of powder?”

“Co— cocoa powder, mommy! This one..” The little finger then slid to the second ingredient.

••

Your little girl’s eyes widen when the sound of a car came from the garage. There was no other car that could have parked in the garage except for your husband’s.

“Daddy is here! Mommy, daddy’s here! We need to be faster!” She made a hop sound as her dangling little feet touched the ground and scrambled to get her princess plate from the cupboard.

“Use Alyn’s plate!” She lifted her pink coloured plate up high for you to place one of the baked goods.

The sound of the door slammed put your little conversation with Aaralyn to an end. There were no words exchanged as both of you stared at Jude. He threw his bag on the couch, the things inside hit with some of your daughter’s toys.

“Alyn, I told you to clean up your toys, didn’t I?” The tense in Jude’s voice was enough to make his mood known to the rest of the family members.

“Uh-oh, mommy wait!” Your daughter tiptoed to place her plate back on the kitchen counter before scrambling to the living room.

You were looking from afar as she straighten her arm to grab on her little toy whilst Jude was ignoring her existence, eyes solely on his phone.

“Daddy, can help me? Please?” Aaralyn mumbled a little as she patted on her dad’s laps.

“You should clean up your own mess. We talked about this yet you still refuse to learn.” He stood up, picked up the bag which he threw earlier and headed straight to the bedroom, leaving your little girl alone.

You saw she brought her little hands close to her chest, lips pouting as she stood there, completely baffled with what just happened.

“Baby, it’s alright. Mommy will help you.” You picked up your daughter’s toy box and brought it closer to the couch, Aaralyn then made a little noise as she jumped on the couch to gather all of the toys left.

“Daddy might be feeling a little sad today. I’m sorry about what happened, sweetheart.” You cupped on her chubby cheeks to give them a little kiss.

“It’s awright! Daddy will be happy after my cookie!” She squealed.

Your brows lifted, smile widen as she mentioned the main point of the day. “You are right! I forgot about the cookies. Should we bring it to daddy?”

“It’s okay! Alyn will do it.”

You trailed behind as she ran back to the kitchen, boths arms high up in the air to get her plate back.

“Be careful!” As soon as you handed her plate back, she already made her way to the room where Jude went.

“Alyn will come back after I make daddy happy!” Her voice sounded afar as she ran to the hallway.

Aaralyn’s pace stopped in a sudden as she nearly hit the closed door. There came a new problem as she couldn’t knock on the door whilst holding the plate.

“Uh-oh..” The soft little mumble slipped out from her mouth.

“Daddy? It’s me!” The back of her hand hesitantly knocked on the door as she took a step back, waiting for a response.

Jude heaved a sigh, arm propped up to cover his eyes. He wished a second for himself and he got was continous knocking sound greeting his ears.

“Daddy…?”

“Daddy!” She crouched down to carefully put the plate on the floor before bringing both of her fists thumping against the door.

“It’s me, Alyn!”

“What do you want from me?!” The inside of the door banged agaist the wall of the bedroom as Jude opened the door. There was nothing but tense in his voice.

Jude saw his little girl struggling to stand up straight with the plate of cookies right as he brought his gaze on her.

Startled by the sudden loud noise, some of the cookies in the plate fell onto the floor. Most of the perfect sized cookie now turned into little bits and pieces.

“Alyn just— just wanna give daddy a cookie…” Your little girl immediately cut the vexed gaze from Jude, her head hung low and she bit on the inside of her cheeks.

“You are making me suffocated. I need a fucking break and I can’t even do that in my house?!”

“Sorry daddy…” Her words turned into a mumble, lips started trembling.

Jude heaved a sigh when he spotted the cookie crumbles now all scattered on the floor. “Great, another mess. Clean it, Alyn. Now!”

Hearing the voice of your husband gradually got louder and louder, you immediately flipped the main valve. You barely had any time to wipe your hands as you scurried to the bedroom where you saw your little girl crouching on the floor, her little chubby hands quivered as she picked up the mess she did.

“Jude! What was that for?!” Fuming, you pushed him by his chest, tears welled up in your eyes.

“I just need a rest, Y/N,” He rolled his eyes with no hint of guilty.

“You could have just said so instead of cursing to my daughter. She did nothing wrong!”

“She should have just left me alone. No one gives a fuck about a fucking cookie right now! I couldn’t play for 2 months and you didn’t even ask me if I’m doing fine!” Jude responded back, not giving any sign to back down nor to tune down his voice.

“I know you aren’t doing fine. Alyn knows it as well. In fact, she knows it better than me. She planned all this. She planned a movie night, we waited for you to come home only to find out you spent a night at Vini’s without telling us beforehand. Alyn wanted to cook your favourite food. We did and you weren’t able to come home again. She then decided to bake her favourite cookies, thinking it could cheer you up only for you to shout at her face. Is it her fault that you have to rest for two months? That you had to lash it all out on her? Do it to me! Scream in my face, Jude! Do it.” Jude didn’t flinched when your fist repeatedly hit on his chest.

“This isn’t about you, Y/N.” He breathed out.

“So, is it about your daughter? Is that why you lashed out on her?”

Instead of saying anything else, he heaved a sigh and made his way to the bathroom.

You went back to where your little girl was sitting. The tears stain were immediately gone as you quickly wiped of your cheeks before crouching in front of her.

“Come, baby,”

Your little girl pulled her hand back from you and went back to picking up the crimbles. “Daddy— daddy asked Alyn to clean up this mess first or daddy will be mad again…”

Your heart broke when she kept her head low. Aaralyn always loved to make eye contacts, she had always been the mood maker in the house.

“Mommy will clean up the mess. Can you go back to your room, please, baby?”

“Daddy won’t be mad..?” She lifted her eyes and you were greeted a pair of puffy eyes, her cheeks were more round as she jushed her lips forward. She looked exactly like Jude and it broke the dam of your tears.

“Daddy won’t be mad at you anymore. Go back to your room? Mommy will see you once I clean this all up, alright?”

**

Jude clearly forgot what happened after. He was literally losing the grasp on time as soon as he woke up from his nap. The blanket was pushed aside as he grabbed on his phone. The brightness made him squint his eyes. The picture of you and your little girl greeted his sight.

3:02

Even in the dark, without him having to turn his head aside, he could still feel the bareness. He wasn’t sure what it was yet. Not until he tapped on the other side of the bed.

It was empty. Untouched even.

“Honey?”

His heartbeat gradually turned even faster as every call was left unanswered. You were a light sleeper. Even a slight noise could have woken you up. Soon as he left the master bedroom, his feet bought him to your little girl’s room. The light was left on but there wasn’t any sight of his baby girl too.

“Aaralyn. Honey?”

Jude went uneasy. His skin turned sticky as he broke intol cold sweats. Part of him wished all of this was just a dream. Before he reached the main door, he caught a glimpse of a pink coloured plate on the dining table with some sort of yellow coloured paper by its side along with a box of crayon pencils.

“Daddy’s

— Aarlyn ❤️”

••

You could have brush it off if it was only between you and him but not to your little girl. Aaralyn was clearly upset. Even when you packed her stuffs, she remained seated at the dining table, staring at her remaining cookie.

As you rearranged her folded clothes into the luggage, she came back into her room, looking determined as if she had to get something done. You let her be as she ran back outside as she took out her crayon set with a piece of paper from her notebook.

Unknown to you, she actually wanted to leavr a little message to her very first love.

“There! For daddy!” She mumbled, the crayon in her hand was slipped back into the rest of the set as she left the paper right beside her plate. Her little hand then rearrange the cookie right in the middle. Not before she took a small bite at the corner of it.

“Daddy will like it…” She murmured with a small smile on her face.

“Come, baby. We gotta go.” You called out to your little girl, voice half whispering not to wake Jude up. After all those things that he did, you dtill couldn’t believe he had the audacity to just call it a night.

“Okay, mommy!” Aaralyn hopped off the chair and ran to you as you crouched down to put on her shoes. As she remain still with her little leg on your lap, she sticked her index finger in her mouth, eyes locked at the dining table area.

“What are you looking at, sweetheart?”

“Alyn forgot to keep my crayon…” She answered.

“That’s alright. Just leave it be.” You picked up your luggage bag, your free hand locked on your little girl’s wrist.

“Mommy, where are we going? Aaralyn asked.

“Daddy needed some time alone so it’s just gonna be you and me.”

[whorekneecentral]

merry smutmas series

hi besties!! since I'm skipping out on kinktober this year, I figured I wouldn’t be fair for me to leave you guys without some sort of holiday treat so here we go again. 

I won’t be able to fit everyone into this series cause with would have taken me forever so between classes and other fics, I’ve been working on this since august lmao. I hope y’all enjoy these as much as I enjoyed writing it &lt;33 // massive thank you to @oconso for the banners and to @themandaloriansdiaries for all the help plotting and for listening to my complaining <3

running from: November 1st to December 31st - every Tuesday, Thursday and on the weekends

tagged under: merry smutmas xoxo 

November 1st: Sebastian Vettel - Sticky Fingers 

Your husband spends his first Christmas at home since his retirement and he went a little.. a lot over board. 

November 4th: Trent Alexander Arnold - As Red As My Stockings 

Trent’s crush on the pretty physio is well known amongst the players. They make sure to help him fulfil one last Christmas wish before you all head home for the holidays.

November 5th: Pato O’Ward - Snow Storms 

Your boyfriend insists the roads are fine to drive despite the massive incoming snow storm; as someone who grew up in cold weather, you knew better. yet, there you were stuck on the side of the road with him in the snow. 

November 7th: Ruben Dias - Miss Me, Miss Me

Your brother holds his annual Christmas party and you’re forced to spend the afternoon with the one person you had been avoiding all season but tis’ the season you guess. (stones!reader)

November 9th: Pierre Gasly - Cocoa

You have your boyfriend drive all around the city until you find the one thing you were looking for. When you finally find it, you decide you want something else. 

November 11th: Ben Chilwell - Snowflakes On The Glass 

Ben insists on having a snowball fight when he wakes up to the massive snowfall but you want nothing more than to stay in bed. 

November 12th: Kimi Raikkonen - Only The Best For You 

Kimi spends the holidays with his old friends. He doesn’t forget you; bringing you exactly what you had been wishing for and you make sure to thank him.. properly. (dad’s best friend!kimi) 

November 14th: Lucas Paquetá - Spin Me Around 

Lucas busts out the champagne and the streamers to celebrate the new years in your new place. 

November 16th: Yuki Tsunoda - Sous Chef 

Yuki finds himself more fascinated by the woman cooking than the food on his plate for once. (chef!reader) 

November 18th: Erling Haaland - Christmas On The Farm 

Erling takes you home to spend the holidays at the Haaland Family Farm and you two end up being the only ones there. 

November 19th: Lance Stroll - Old Friends 

Lance gets an invitation to an old teammate’s place to ring in the new year but he finds himself too distracted by someone in particular to care about the ball dropping (vettel!reader)

November 21st: Jude Bellingham - Ugliest Sweater Wins

Jude is invited to Luka’s Christmas party, an ugly Christmas sweater party to be exact. It took a bit of convincing but you got him to go. 

November 23rd: Daniel Ricciardo - The Flash Of The Camera 

You enlist Daniel to help you with your Christmas gift for him. 

November 25th: John Stones - Black Out 

Your boyfriend blows a fuse with the Christmas lights and you’re stuck in the dark, but you find a way to make the best of it. 

November 26th: Fernando Alonso - Your Pick 

Fernando enlists the help of a certain someone to get his Christmas shopping done but the list is oddly familiar (pr officer!reader)  

November 28th: Kostas Tsimikas - The Smell Of The Holidays 

You over baked for your niece’s holiday bake sale so you do the neighbourly thing and share with your neighbour, Kostas and his two puppies.

November 30th: Toto Wolff - Winter Wonderland 

Your husband skips out on Christmas every year due to work but this year, he ends up in London. You make it your mission to introduce him to some holiday fun.

December 2nd: Christian Pulisic - Ho Ho Hoe

You find a pair of Christmas boxers in Christian’s drawers and decide to tease him about it. 

December 3rd: Mick Schumacher - Merry Ruff-mas 

Angie goes missing the day before Christmas and Mick finds her at the neighbouring ranch, wrapped up with ribbon and bows. 

December 5th: Jordan Henderson - Shivers

Jordan comes in after shovelling the driveway and keeps trying to love on you. You tell him that you can feel how cold he is but he makes sure to show you what cold really feels like. 

December 7th: Lewis Hamilton - Tis’ The Season 

An old friend finds his way to you front door and no matter how much you try to get rid of him, you can’t. 

December 9th: Dominik Szoboszlai - Come Home 

The two of you are separated over the holidays and you’re missing each other a little too much to keep this going. 

December 10th: Charles Leclerc - The Night Before Christmas 

A massive snow storm delays Charles’ flight home for the holidays and you both begin to give up hope but a Christmas miracle occurs.

December 12th: Virgil Van Dijk - Holiday Greetings 

You send your old friend a Christmas card every year and when he sees that a certain someone was no longer in the picture, he pays you a long overdue visit. 

December 14th: Mark Webber - A New Term 

You send your professor an email over the winter break and the man wonders why you’re still working, urging you to come out and relax like everyone else. (Professor!Webber) 

December 16th: Thiago Alcantara - Bubbles 

You find yourself aching from all the holiday prep and your husband being the good man that he was, makes sure you’re feeling okay after a long day. 

December 17th: Jenson Button - A Sandy Christmas 

Jenson takes you on a dream vacation over the holidays but still makes sure you’ve got a gift to open come Christmas morning. (Sugar Daddy!Jenson) 

December 19th: Kylian Mbappe - Family’s Growing 

Kylian finds himself swooning over how good you are with his niece and nephew, the thought of having a family with you spins around his head. 

December 21st: Carlos Sainz Jr - Traditions 

Coming back from Christmas with your family, the two of you return to Spain to celebrate new years with his family and all their traditions. 

December 23rd: Andy Robertson - Mistletoe Means Kisses 

The overpowering smell of mistletoe hits you when you walk into he house, your husband came up with his own plan while you were out. 

December 24th: George Russell - A New Tradition 

You and George spend your first Christmas together and you mash together the traditions from both of your families. 

December 26th: Jack Grealish - Always Around 

A wild new years night out leaves you bumping the same person over and over again. 

December 28th: Esteban Ocon - The Gift Of Giving 

Esteban takes a liking to the barista that works at the cafe near his place. He finally works up the courage to ask her out in time for the holidays. 

December 30th: Sergio Ramos - Secret Santa 

The players and the staff play secret Santa every year; they write a letter, toss in a box and everyone picks. Sergio some how lands on the person he’s always had a soft spot for. 

December 31st: Max Verstappen - Time Is Running Out 

Max wasn’t one for resolutions but as the clock counts down the hours to new years, he finds himself running to resolve the biggest resolution on his list; you. 

[anadiasmount]

teach me how to forget - jude bellingham x reader.

summary: this is mostly based on some lyrics from romeo santos songs. a not so girls trip but getting an unexpected call that leaves you thinking… i’ll leave it there *winks*

wc: 2.5k | masterlist | jude’s masterlist

psa 🗣️: was in the mood to write and this was a request i had received so anon here you go :p i love toxic jude and i shall write what the girlies want :ppppo

This time of year was a time filled with love and warmth. The Christmas lights, the decorations, the hot cocoa, the feeling of giving back, the feeling of security. While those thoughts remained in your head, you were constantly reminded how single and lonely you were, especially when you decided to take a trip with your girlfriends and their partners. 

They laughed, rejoiced, hugged, smiled, and had that look of love every time they stared at them, you felt left out and felt the urge to have what they have. It wasn't jealousy or anger, you felt more than happy for them, but now the idea of love began to make you mad. You had given everything to him, and you would do it again only under different circumstances. 

It was your first serious relationship, well you thought, after the last one you had in high school. Serious as in you thought it would be the man you’d marry. The day every little girl wished for, though when growing up you hated it, why give so much commitment? But unexpectedly with his lies and broken promises, he changed your opinion about marriage. He changed your opinion about love.

You once looked at him with adoration in his eyes, hugged his bicep in public to send a message to others, kissed his cheek first and then his lips when he visited you or saw him after some time apart, you would giggle at night when talking about your futures together, the warm feeling inside never leaving your chest as he held you close to him. The way his soft brown eyes bore into yours when he left you. 

But he was never yours, there wasn't ever a label or words said to claim him as yours.

You poured your heart to him, asking him, you needed to know the why, to get rid of the heavy and painful feeling in your heart, that felt like it was being stabbed each minute that passed by. Couldn't he see it? Why was it so hard for him to see how much you were willing and had already sacrificed to be with him? Was the love you gave him ever enough, all the kisses, cries, laughter? 

For the first time in your life, you felt something real, a love like in the movies, yet this was actuality. No more good night calls or texts, cuddles, sharing a bathroom to get ready, or his big t-shirts, exchanging looks across the room which ended in the two of you going home, or kisses knowing that they were forbidden. In the end, whatever happened it happened for a reason. 

As much as it hurt and brought misery, you were able to reconstruct yourself. You tried to convince yourself this would be a lesson for the future, a lesson that was learned the hard way as not only you lost your best friend but also your first love. Love can be cruel and painful, but in the end, it brings two souls together that are meant to be. 

“Are you good babes? You look uncomfortable,” your friend joked, earning a small laugh from you. “I'm okay, just feeling very much like a third wheel,” you said honestly and shrugged your shoulders. This trip was planned at the last minute, a girls' trip to be said, but that changed when their partner tagged along, as it was conveniently their only time off from work. 

While it angered you and almost made you not come, you realized they also needed this with them, you couldn't be that careless and selfish, though you would keep it in mind for next time. You also had wasted your money on the trip so there was no backing out, you needed a deserved break from your busy life in Spain. 

“I promise tonight is our night. They guys are going to fish overnight by the bay so we can head to the club and drink till there’s no tomorrow,” she said cheerfully, giving you a side hug before standing up and walking over to the closet where your clothes hung. “How is it going with that guy Joel?” she questioned pulling out a couple of outfits for you. 

You grimaced and shook your head, “I don't see him like that… he’s amazing don’t get me wrong, but he’s kinda boring? I don’t know, he is marrying for image and I want something way different. The dates were fun but in the end, he’s looking for one thing and I don’t want that, you know?” you explained while fidgeting with your rings that suddenly felt loose. 

“But at the same time, when I'm with him, all I can feel is happiness. When he isn't being cocky or serious he treats me well, buys me flowers, and showers me with love. I feel like it feels so wrong, but at the same time, he is always there for me. He has seen me at my worst and hasn't once judged me for it.”

Your friend raised her brow and handed you a tight navy blue dress, “I understand, just have fun. You're single, sexy, an amazing woman, and independent. When the time is right, that person will appear,” she kissed your head and urged you to change. “I expect you to be the drunkest, don't think of him, he isn't worth your tears pretty.” 

With that she walked off, leaving you standing still, was she referring to Joel or Jude? She was right, no feelings could change the new ones you felt. 

It ended up being the complete opposite, your friends were all drunk and sang loudly to an old rock song, while you laughed and took small sips from your third cranberry vodka. You would join in at times, but their wobbly bodies made it hard as they would cling to you for support. The drunk selfies and videos you all took made them giggle as you all took a ride back home. 

Jude saw it all. He was watching but from his home in Spain. He felt the cold and empty space next to him. He realized it was becoming too much for him, and he had to do something about it. But he always held back knowing it wasn't fair on your part. You deserved to be happy after all the pain he caused. But knowing he fully hasn't apologized was killing him. Or the fact the picture of you laughing with another man built a rubble of jealousy in his chest.

His thumbs always found their way to your contact, where he had your name next to a white heart, and the contact picture he took when you accompanied him to Germany. It all felt so familiar to him, reminding him of the good times you’d spent together, whether it was in his home, the beloved coffee shop, or the bookstore in downtown London you love dearly. Your smile, the personality he envied because you were perfect, so pure, your eyes that said the truth, and hands that built warmth when he held or felt them. 

He missed you terribly, longing to hear your voice or see you even if it was for a second. He caved in and dialed you, coming face to face with your smile that shined bright as he heard the phone dial.

“If you need anything please let me know,” you said to your friend, who drunkenly fell asleep on her bed. You quickly showered and changed into your pajamas, putting your hair into a messy bun and laying down on the queen-sized bed. You scrolled through the TV and ate your salty crisps. You hadn't heard your phone ring, but when you saw two missed calls from his number you let out a huge gasp and sat upright. 

Your hand dragged across your forehead, the familiar feeling of fear and uneasiness hitting you again in a huge wave. You bit your nails and dropped your phone taking a huge gulp of water as your throat became dry. 

Hey. I called and you didn't answer. Can you call? 

Give me a second, is everything okay?

No. I’d like to talk to you about something. Please just answer. 

Why would he call? What was so important that made him call you twice and send you a message? You soon would find out as you heard your phone buzz again. Your heart raced again, banging loudly in your chest, everything in the room around you was bright and colourful, the cold sheets now hot, the crisps being hard to swallow, and the vibration of your phone reminding you he was waiting. 

“H-h-hello?” you said shaky, hearing the relief on the other end. Jude on the other end felt nervous, his airpods put away as he brought his phone closer to his ear to hear your voice clearer, to feel you. “Y/n hi. Hi, uh, hi…” Jude chuckled anxiously, biting his lip, forgetting why he even called. “Did you need something?” you said in a low voice, whispering almost, as you muted the TV. 

“I wanted to know something…” 

“Which is?”

“I wanted to know if you remember our trip to Munich after the season ended last year,” he said slowly, voice deeper than what you were used to. How could you forget that trip? Were you kissed for the first time and promised to be at each other's side no matter what went on? A deal is a deal, a promise is a promise, but you weren't sure why he was recalling this exact moment. “What are you trying to get at?” you said instead of responding to his question. 

“Answer the question… Do you remember the trip and what happened?” he asked again, leaving you confused and tugging your sheets up. “Yes. Of course, I remember,” you caved in, shutting your eyes, and attempting to calm your nerves. “And what did we promise, that we’d be there for each other, no?” he said. 

“Things changed Jude. You changed things when you decided to leave and walk out. I can't promise you that, because what you did in the end was break them. You want me to be there for you? What about that time I begged for you to stay so we could work it out, and you did the opposite? To give you that promise I would have to trust your word again…” you deadpanned seriously, feeling the bubble of anger construct in your chest, your knuckles white as you control the feeling. 

“You can't trust me?” Jude said softly and hurt. He knew he had hurt you, but for you to tell it and show it to his face was the least thing he expected. “No? How could I, when in the end you proved me wrong?” you said, but Jude had caught you when you didn't voice it, the no being a question instead of an answer. If he was there with you, your eyes would tell him the truth. 

“Are you happy with him? Does he know how much I consider him my enemy for having what belonged to me, even if the one to blame is me? That I envy him for being able to make you smile even the slightest bit when it should be me?” Jude says, leaving you dumbfounded before realizing why he called. “I'm tired of your silly games. You couldn't maintain a serious thing with me, and you have the nerve to call me about-”

“I saw you laugh, I saw you cry. I lived next to you. The best and worst chapters of our novel. From our history. If you taught me to love, also teach me to forget what I feel because you are the woman I love and want. I learned to love beside you, you taught me to love, but you didn't teach me what was harmful, that love was harmful…” he said breathlessly, your chest rising up and down as he confessed his pure feelings. 

“Jude-” 

“I love you so much that I'm afraid to see you again. I only relive those old memories where you'd sit on my bed, a warm cup of coffee in your hand as you watched your soap operas. I still read your love letters, in the hope that one day you’ll come back to me. Who will heal this pain that you left inside me when you went away? Whoever invented love, should have given instructions to avoid suffering,” you couldn't believe what you were hearing. 

The tears coming down your cheeks, and your hand covering your mouth to hide the loud sobs. He heard them, as a tear glided on his cheek wanting nothing more than to be there with you. But the same distance that separated the two of you, was the same reason he couldn't hold or have you anymore. 

“Why tell me this now? Tell me you love me but showed otherwise. You say I taught you how to love, and hope one day I'll come back? Where was this when I needed to hear when I begged you, Jude? I probably looked stupid confessing my feelings while all this time you hid yours away. You weren't ready, I get that, but it's too late. I learned and I lost, and I can't go down that road with you again,” you croaked, sniffling and whipping the tears away. 

“If you think I have replaced you, I haven't. As much as he makes me happy, you ruined that for me. I constantly picture you instead of him. I feel like a coward for leading on a good man, knowing that what I feel won't ever be enough or fair to him. I've tried Jude, i've tried to forget you without holding a grudge, but it's so hard when I love you this deeply,” you let out crying, yours and Jude’s heartbreaking every second that passed by. 

Jude couldn't stand it, the silence was killing him, suddenly spoke out and poured his heart out to you, your gut wrenching hearing him at the way he felt over the months that passed by. Pain clawed your hearts, chests heaving as you could feel the soulmate connection even from afar. His voice brings you a sense of calmness and relief. He felt the familiar feeling of home when he heard you laugh, slowly coming out of your protective shelf. 

“Without you, my life leads nowhere. But I took you for granted, and now I'm hanging from a rope. I know that you know I'll do whatever for your love, so tell me what I can do to call you mine again, baby?” Jude’s voice cracked, the pleading in his voice showing raw emotion.

“Come to me. I need you to prove your love to me and that it isn't for games.”

[musicforastylesrestaurant]

Snack Wars.

my masterlist || ask me anything <3

my blurb masterlist is here!

authors note - niall and louis have done it, now it’s time for hazza to take part.

word count - 2.6k

in which, on this episode of snack wars, we sit down with a certain curly headed lad who goes by the name of harry styles who happens to be comparing british and american snacks.

"Hi, M’Harry Styles, and this is Snack Wars: Britain versus America on LADbible."

He was sat at a small table, wearing an open buttoned black blouse revealing his swallow tattooed partially, and a matching pair of black trousers, with a black version of his satellite stompers.

The scene cut to a moment of anticipation as Harry, a playful smile on his face, leaned forward to lift the silver cloche that concealed the surprise snack showdown. With an air of curiosity, he wondered aloud, "What ‘ave y’got for me, huh?”

With a theatrical flourish, Harry unveiled the hidden treasures. His eyes widened as he beheld the items laid before him.

"Well, this is intriguing," he mused.

On the British side, there sat a classic bone china teacup, adorned with delicate floral patterns. Steam wafted from the cup, carrying the unmistakable aroma of freshly brewed English tea. A smile tugged at the corners of Harry's lips as he appreciated the comforting sight.

Then, on the American side, he found a tall Starbucks cup, its iconic logo staring back at him.

"Hot chocolate, huh?" Harry noted, his eyes sparkling with curiosity. The rich, velvety beverage was topped with a generous dollop of whipped cream, drizzled with chocolate syrup—a quintessential indulgence.

Harry couldn't help but chuckle at the contrast before him.

"A classic cup of English tea versus a Starbucks hot chocolate," he said with a playful grin. "S’like comparing tradition with a bit of modern comfort."

As he picked up the English teacup, Harry took a contemplative sip and savoured the warm, familiar flavour.

"Y’just can't beat a good cuppa," he admitted with a nod of approval.

Turning his attention to the Starbucks hot chocolate, as he brought the cup closer to his mouth and took a sip of the Starbucks hot chocolate, a warm smile crossed his face.

"Y’know," he mused, "S’m’son Jude's favorite drink at t’moment."

From behind the camera, the producer, Becky, chimed in with a playful tone.

"Well, Harry, you might have to take it home with you then," she suggested.

Harry turned toward the camera, a twinkle in his eye, and replied,

"Yeah, I might have to," adding a soft chuckle. The idea of bringing a taste of the challenge back to his family seemed rather appealing.

"N’this s’like a cosy hug in a cup," he quipped.

With both cups now in hand, Harry found himself in the middle of a delightful dilemma. He was torn between the classic cup of English tea and the comforting Starbucks hot chocolate. He took another sip of the hot chocolate, the rich cocoa flavour lingering on his taste buds, and then turned to the English tea, its aroma inviting him back to tradition.

With a playful frown, he mused aloud, "S’a tough decision, isn't it?"

The camera captured his contemplative expression as he hesitated. Finally, he extended his index finger, pointing toward the cup of English tea.

"Y’know," Harry said with a hint of hesitation, "y’just can't beat a bit of tradition."

As he made his choice, he looked into the camera, a mischievous glint in his eye, and added, "But don't get me wrong, s’hot chocolate s’fantastic too."

The crew behind the scenes chuckled at Harry's charming indecision, understanding the difficulty of choosing between two beloved beverages.

As the scene wrapped up with Harry having chosen the English tea, there was a moment of transition, and another producer, Sarah, stepped in, placing a fresh cloche on the table.

Harry, ever the showman, decided to play along. He feigned excitement, clapping his hands together as if he were a kid about to open a birthday present.

"Ooh, S’under this one, ey?" he exclaimed with playful enthusiasm.

The crew behind the camera burst into laughter at Harry's antics. It was a heartwarming moment of genuine amusement, and it made Harry feel happy that he could bring a bit of laughter to the set.

Sarah joined in on the fun, making a dramatic reveal as she lifted the cloche, unveiling a new surprise snack.

With the producer, Sarah, excusing herself to organise the next set of snacks, Harry turned back to face the camera. He couldn't help but maintain his charming grin, fully embracing the fun and spontaneity of the Snack Wars challenge.

With a sly wink to the camera, he reached forward, once again lifting the cloche. The reveal this time brought forth a quintessentially British delight – a plate of buttered crumpets. The golden-brown crumpets glistened under the studio lights, promising a warm, comforting taste of the UK.

As Harry lifted the cloche to reveal the buttered crumpets, he couldn't quite hide a slightly disdained expression. The golden discs of toasted goodness sat there, tempting, but his reaction was unmissable.

Producer Becky, who was watching closely, couldn't help but notice Harry's reaction. She raised an eyebrow and said, "Not a fan of crumpets, Harry?"

Harry chuckled, his signature honesty shining through.

"Y’know ‘hat?," he began, "M’not exactly t’biggest fan f’crumpets, t’be honest. S’the texture, y’see."

He leaned forward, elaborating, "M’don't really like how they feel in t’mouth. S’a bit... spongy f’m’liking." He demonstrated by pressing a finger into one of the crumpets, watching it bounce back. "But ey’, s’just me."

With the crumpets before him, Harry Styles decided to give them another chance. He leaned forward, picked up one of the buttered crumpets, and took a cautious bite. However, as soon as he tasted the spongy texture, his face contorted in discomfort.

He chewed for a moment, but it was clear that the texture didn't sit well with him. Harry quickly reached for a napkin and discreetly spat out the bite he had taken. He shook his head, a look of mild frustration on his face, and simply said, "I can't do it. I can't."

The crew around him chuckled, empathising with his culinary struggles. Harry Styles may be an international superstar, but even he had his food preferences.

Harry, ever the trooper, decided to set aside the crumpets and turned his attention to the colourful box of Lucky Charms. With a playful glint in his eye, he grabbed a bowl and poured a generous serving of the whimsical cereal. The rainbow-hued marshmallow shapes and toasted oat pieces tumbled into the bowl, creating a delightful medley of colours.

He then grabbed the jug of cold milk and added a generous splash, watching as the cereal pieces began to bob and soak up the milk. With a cheeky grin, he couldn't resist poking fun at his previous crumpet encounter. He turned to the camera and quipped, "Anything's better than those crumpets, am I right?"

The crew burst into laughter, sharing in his jest. Harry then picked up a spoon, scooped up a spoonful of Lucky Charms, and brought it to his mouth. As the sweet, crunchy goodness met his taste buds, his eyes sparkled with delight. He savored the delightful combination of textures and flavors, nodding approvingly.

With a mouthful of cereal, he gave a thumbs-up to the camera, clearly enjoying the contrast between the playful sweetness of the American cereal and the earlier challenge of the British crumpets.

“One point to America.” He grinned after he swallowed the mouthful.

The scene transitioned smoothly, and as the camera focused on the table, another cloche awaited Harry’s playful curiosity. With a grin, he leaned forward and lifted the cloche to reveal a Greggs bakery wrapper and a McDonald's wrapper neatly placed side by side.

Harry couldn't help but chuckle at the sight. "Well, well, well," he said with a twinkle in his eye. "Can't go wrong with either of these, can ya?"

The crew laughed, understanding the dilemma he was about to face – a classic choice between the savoury delights of a Greggs bakery treat and the fast-food comfort of McDonald's.

With a mock-serious expression, he picked up the Greggs wrapper, his anticipation evident. "S’what we've got here,ey?"

As Harry pulled the Greggs wrapper open, he was met with a surprise – a vegan sausage roll neatly nested inside. He leaned forward, his curiosity piqued, and brought the roll closer to his nose to take in its scent.

He gave it a tentative sniff and then grinned.

"Interesting," he mused, before taking a hearty bite out of the vegan sausage roll. His eyes twinkled as he chewed, clearly contemplating the taste.

After a few moments, Harry swallowed and offered his verdict.

"Well, I like it," he said with a nod. "S’got that sausage taste, y’know?

With the taste of the vegan sausage roll still on his palate, Harry shifted his attention to the McDonald's wrapper. He couldn't help but smile as he pulled out a Fillet-O-Fish box. The familiar golden arches symbolised a comforting fast-food favorite .

The producer, who had orchestrated this surprise, chimed in, "We thought you might enjoy that, Harry, considering you're pescatarian."

Harry's eyes brightened as he looked at the Filet-O-Fish box.

"Well, thank y’for thinking of me," he replied warmly. "S’always nice t’have options."

With gratitude in his voice, he proceeded to open the box, revealing the crispy fish sandwich inside. The delightful aroma of the fish and tartar sauce filled the air, making him even more eager to take a bite.

With a grin of anticipation, Harry took a big bite of the Fillet-O-Fish. The moment the flavors hit his taste buds, his eyes closed in pleasure, and he let out a satisfied hum. It was clear that the familiar taste brought him genuine delight.

He tilted his head back slightly, savoring the moment, and the producers couldn't help but laugh at his enthusiastic reaction. It was a simple yet heartwarming display of food appreciation.

As he finished that delicious bite, one of the producers asked, "Harry, do you have McDonald's a lot?"

Harry shook his head, his mouth still full. He chewed and swallowed before answering,

"Not really, but it does hold a special place in m’heart."

He continued,

"Y’see, it was actually mine and m’fiancée's first takeaway together, about six years ago. So, s’got some sentimental value." Harry's eyes softened as he reminisced about that memorable moment.

The crew smiled, appreciating the personal touch Harry added to the Snack Wars challenge.

So it was safe to say that McDonald’s got the point for that one.

As Harry lifted the next cloche lid, he uncovered a delightful surprise – a Victoria sponge cake and a Twinkie side by side. The contrast between the classic British treat and the iconic American snack was evident.

Harry couldn't help but smile at the sight of the Victoria sponge, its layers of sponge and sweet jam filling beckoning to him.

"Now, this looks promising," he remarked.

However, his gaze lingered on the Twinkie, and he let out a small chuckle.

"Ah, Twinkies," he said, a hint of amusement in his voice. "V’actually had a bit of a... bad experience with these."

Producer Becky, always curious, couldn't resist asking for more details. "Oh, really? What happened, Harry?"

Harry leaned back, a thoughtful expression on his face.

"Well, when I was around nineteen, I was touring in t’States," he began, "n’someone dared me t’eat a whole box of Twinkies in one go." He paused, his eyes crinkling with a mix of nostalgia and humor. "I took up t’challenge, but let's just say it didn't end well. I ended up... well, throwing them all up."

The crew burst into laughter at Harry's candid confession. It was a tale of youthful daredevilry and the consequences of overindulgence, and it added another layer of charm to the Snack Wars challenge.

Harry couldn't help but be drawn to the sight of the Victoria sponge cake. Its soft layers and sweet jam filling were a comforting temptation. With a subtle smile, he slowly pushed the Twinkie away from him, turning all his attention to the British delight that made his mouth water.

Without hesitation, he picked up the entire cake with both hands and, with a mischievous glint in his eye, took an enormous, unapologetic bite. The sweet icing smeared all over his scruff and lips as he indulged in the delightful treat.

Amidst Harry's enthusiastic cake-eating, the crew couldn't contain their laughter. Icing adorned his face, and the scene was a humorous mix of sophistication and playful indulgence.

With his mouth full of cake, Harry attempted to speak, his words muffled as he declared, "Britain... takes the point on this one!" His sentiment was clear despite the sugary obstacle, and the crew erupted into even more laughter at his charmingly messy verdict.

As the Snack Wars challenge continued, the next cloche was unveiled, revealing yet another intriguing matchup. On one side of the table sat a bottle of Pimms, accompanied by a glass of lemonade, and on the other side was a shot glass with a bottle of bourbon beside it.

Harry, ever the adventurer, leaned forward to examine the options before him. His eyes sparkled with curiosity as he took in the contrasting beverages.

"S’a fun choice," he remarked with a grin. "We've got a taste f’British summer with Pimms and lemonade on one side, and a good old American bourbon on the other."

With a thoughtful nod, Harry decided to start with the Pimms and lemonade. He picked up the bottle of Pimms and carefully poured some into the glass of lemonade. The vibrant red and orange hues mingled with the fizzy lemonade, creating a refreshing blend.

He brought the glass up to his lips and took a sip. His eyes lit up as he savoured the harmonious combination of flavours.

"S’good," he declared with a contented smile.

Harry leaned back in his chair, gazing into the distance with a nostalgic glint in his eye.

"Y’know," he began, "s’actually reminds me f’when I go back t’m’mum's house in the summer. S’her favourite drink."

After enjoying the Pimms and lemonade, Harry turned his attention to the bourbon, a drink he admitted he hadn't had much experience with. He picked up the shot glass, inspecting the rich amber liquid within.

"V’not really had bourbon before," he admitted with a curious expression.

Undeterred, he decided to give it a try and threw the shot down the back of his throat. The moment the bourbon hit his palate, he grimaced as the fiery liquid burned its way down his throat. He shook his head, trying to soothe the sensation.

The crew watched with amusement and sympathy, realising that bourbon could be quite the intense experience for a first-timer.

After his adventurous sip of bourbon, Harry Styles placed the shot glass back on the table and looked between the two drinks before him – the Pimms and lemonade and the bourbon. His expression conveyed a sense of contemplation as he considered the flavours and experiences each beverage offered.

With a thoughtful nod, he finally made his decision.

"I think," he began, "I'll give the point t’Britain on this one."

His choice was clear, as he favoured the refreshing blend of Pimms and lemonade, a taste that held sentimental value and fond memories for him.

With the Snack Wars challenge completed, Harry still faced the camera, a contented smile on his face after the culinary adventure he had just embarked upon. The table before him held remnants of both British and American treats, a testament to the diversity of flavours he had experienced.

Becky, one of the producers, couldn't resist the opportunity to share the results. She leaned in and asked, "Harry, would you like to know the final result?"

Harry turned toward her, his curiosity piqued, and replied with a playful grin, "Yes, I'd love t’know!"

Becky beamed and announced, "Britain won!"

Harry chuckled and nodded in approval.

"Ah, y’can't go wrong with t’British," he quipped, showcasing his patriotism with a touch of humour.

[kurishiri]

THE CHARA CAFE × Ikemen Villains menu translation

(src) this translation may not be 100% accurate or contain creative liberties. You can click on the image for better quality. Please reblog, not respost!

which ones would you order? ✨✨

To my precious robin and from the self-righteous king, a most sinful love: a frozen strawberry drink (William)

strawberry ice cream

strawberries

milk

strawberry sauce

whipped cream

I encaged the scenery I saw with you inside this glass: a blue ocean drink (Elbert)

blue raspberry syrup

lemon water

lemon slice

gold leaf

Drink this if ya want. I ain’t drinkin’ it though: a ruthless butterfly pea soda (Jude)

butterfly pea syrup

carbonated water

lemon syrup

violet jelly

I want your greatest happiness: a berry tea of happiness (Ellis)

berry tea

blackcurrant jam

For you, the sinful one who wandered into a den of evil: the death god’s hot chocolate (Victor)

cocoa

whipped cream

coffee sauce

Blooming in the dark night, a violet cream soda

cider

purple melon syrup

vanilla ice cream

cherry

wafer cake with bean jam (monaka)

I swear a most sinful love to you on this wedding mocktail

pink grapefruit syrup

peach cheese

carbonated water

edible flower

“So that you, the one I love, may smile, I cast a magic spell on this”: the Cheshire Cat’s fresh fruit salad (Liam)

salad mix

smoked salmon

raisins

grapefruit

diced nuts

lemon dressing

black pepper

edible flower

wafer cake with bean jam (monaka)

“Nothing like meat for a reward, don’t you agree, lil lady?”: the egoist’s roast beef plate (Roger)

roast beef

rice

rock salt

baby leaves

parsley

mini tomatoes

camembert cheese

steak sauce

The Crown members’ favorite! The head chef’s special tomato sauce pasta

pasta

tomato sauce

bacon

consommé soup

parsley

crouton

“Hey, wanna split this half and half with me?”: a chocolate mint parfait of the Lying Fox’s charm (Harrison)

bavarois

mint jelly

chocolate corn flakes

whipped cream

mint chocolate ice cream

chocolate sauce

mint

brownie

“Aha! It’s my creation, as someone with a steel stomach”: a special scone set made by Alfons

scone

vanilla ice cream

blue raspberry syrup

whipped cream

chervil

biscuit

silver dragee

A vow to fall deeper into your sinful love: a wedding berry cake set

berry cake

macaron

cookie

whipped cream

mint

cotton candy

rock salt

wafer cake with bean jam (monaka)

Dessert of the robin on a moment’s break: a fresh fruit cocktail

cider

orange (mandarin)

yellow peach

cherry

strawberry

three-colored agar agar

heart-shaped gummy

popping candy

if you order something from the food or dessert menu, you’ll be gifted a 2L photocard (top), and if you order a drink, you get a coaster (bottom).

[shatcey]

Names in IkeVil

All combinations of first and last names I find extremely good. They sound catching and are easy to remember. It has always been a challenge for me to remember the names of new characters, but here… I had only one problem. I've always confused William with Victor. To me, all names that start with the same letter (in this case, they sound like they start with the same letter) are very similar. And here not only one letter, but also the first syllable sound the same. You know… that was tough. It's only then I start calling them by pet names (Willy and Vic) I finally start hearing them differently.

There is a pseudoscience that claims that all words or names can be described in a few words that convey the emotions you experience when you hear them. It called phonosemantics. I cannot say that this is real science, because there is no (and cannot be) proof… everything is incredibly personal. But it exists, and I find the concept very fascinating.

But first let's talk about how I hear their names. Random order. Don't look for deep meaning.

Liam Evans. It sounds very soft and sweet to me, like marshmallows. It's very streamlined and even shapeless, but it's still extremely pleasant to hear and easy to remember. It's a good name for an actor.

Jude Jazza. Juicy. That's the first thought. It sways pleasantly in the mouth, I wanna repeat it again and again. To me, it sounds like a sour candy with a sweet core that constantly hits the teeth with an unpleasant, but for some reason attractive sound.

William Rex. A very loud and strong name. It sounds like the name of a political leader or something. But in the end it softened slightly, so the impression changed a bit. Now it feels like a warm blanket. I can't see him as food. A shame…

Harrison Gray. Another strong name. But it sounds softer, more stable… there are no sharp corners in it. It is strong, but soft. I don't know why, but it feels like something with carrot in it. Not juice, maybe cake… I'm sorry, Harry… You're not strawberry milk.

Roger Barel. I don't know why this name feels like a balm that smooths all problems. It's warm and cozy. It's like sitting by the fireplace with a cup of cocoa. Funny… I don't like this guy, but his name makes the most calming impression on me.

Alfons Sylvatica. Very unusual. I see it as something with a lot of spices, like an Indian food, but the taste is constantly changing. I love it. I like the softness of his name, how unique and very odd it sounds… This name is not easy to pronounce, but there is something alluring about it. I really like it.

Elbert Greetia. His name gave the impression of something big but soft. It sounds strong at first, but in the end it sounds like something small and even shy one… For some reason, he reminds me of cotton candy.

Ellis Twilight. Very soft, very smooth, but somehow cold… For some reason, I see a picture of being outside in the middle of the night (perhaps due of the meaning) in a field of flowers or on the riverbank… perhaps both. It's a summer night, soft and calm, with lots of stars in the sky. It's a little cold, but not enough to feel chills. Compare with food… maybe ice cream. It's incredibly delicious, but if you're not careful all the time, you may catch a cold.

Victor. It feels small (funny, considering the character), but soft, with a lot of cream.

And this is how phonosemantic analysis describes these names*:

Liam Evans. Good, safe, beautiful, rounded, smooth, bright, kind, joyful, simple.

Jude Jazza. Manly, brave, rude, big, strong, mighty, loud.

William Rex. Safe, nice, rounded, beautiful, big, majestic.

Harrison Gray. Manly

Roger Barel. Brave, mighty, courageous, strong, rude, big, loud, majestic, bright.

Alfons Sylvatica. Quiet, weak, frail, dim.

Elbert Greetia. Big, simple, good, beautiful.

Ellis Twillight. Nice, beautiful, safe, big, majestic, rounded.

Victor. There are no pronounced characteristics.

* I haven't found an easy way to get these characteristics in English. There are many articles, but I'm too lazy to read to figure out how to do it myself (and I don't really have time for this). I need a form where I can enter a name and click a button to get the result. But I didn't find anything like this in English. So I used transliteration into my native language, entered it into forms, found the result, translated it back into English (yes, I had time for that!!!). And suddenly I discovered that I probably don't pronounce all the names correctly. The biggest issue was with Greetia. I always pronounce it the way I see it [Gritia], but the translator says it should be [Grisha]. And depending on how it's pronounced, I get different results. Not much different, but still… So I choose the words the way I found it more correct.

I was a little offended because of Alfons, but you cannot change the facts, aren't you? And Victor, as always, is mysterious…

Take a look for yourself. I think there's a lot in common with the characters. So maybe devs are using this "science" when choosing their names. Or it's just a coincidence… Or this thing really works…

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🔝 Start page 🔝

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[glossyblue]

"A RECIPE FOR LOVE"

glossyblue: hi, hope you're ok🙋🏻‍♀️🤍 sorry it's short, *english is not my first language*

Summary: baking cake with jude in your first year anniversary is so much fun and lovely.

Pairing: Jude bellingham × Y/N

⋆

Jude Bellingham and Y/N found themselves in their cozy little apartment, surrounded by the sweet aroma of baking chocolate cake. As they worked together to measure out the ingredients, Y/N couldn't help but tease Jude about his questionable measuring skills."Are you sure that's a cup of sugar and not a mountain?" Y/N joked, causing Jude to roll his eyes playfully. "I like my cakes sweet," Jude retorted with a grin, as he attempted to pour the sugar more carefully this time. Their banter continued as they mixed the batter, with Jude making a few questionable dance moves to the beat of the mixer. Y/N couldn't help but laugh at his antics, feeling grateful for these silly moments they shared. As they poured the batter into the cake pans, Y/N accidentally spilled a bit on the counter, earning a mock gasp from Jude. "I thought you were the expert baker here!" he teased, grabbing a spoon to clean up the mess. Y/N chuckled, "Hey, a little mess adds character to the cake, right?" With the cake in the oven, they settled down at the kitchen table, sipping on mugs of hot cocoa. They reminisced about their favorite memories from the past year, sharing stories and dreams for the future. The warmth of the apartment and the love between them filled the room, creating a cozy atmosphere that felt like home. When the timer finally went off, they eagerly pulled the cake out of the oven, admiring their slightly lopsided creation. "It may not be perfect, but it's made with love," Y/N said, reaching for the frosting to cover up any imperfections. "Anything with you is exciting and romantic, my dear." And he kissed y/n's hair ...

As they sat down to enjoy the cake, they savored each bite, knowing that it wasn't just about the dessert itself, but the laughter, love, and memories they had created together in their cozy little kitchen.

---------------------------------------- ᵍˡᵒˢˢʸᵇˡᵘᵉ ᵒⁿ ᵗᵘᵐᵇˡʳ💌

[femme4ngel]

can i req some jude angst, maybe jude x bestfriend! reader who’s crying to him cuz her bf cheated on her and she walked in on it (jude already hated this guy- and all the guys before) and maybe jude gets a mad- a little yelling at her because a) that guy was obviously going to cheat- he was an asshole and y/n is blind, and b) he just doesn’t understand why she’s practically doing this to herself when he’s been right there the entire time- all of this leading to an aggressive confession and maybe a tearful kiss, or even further 😗 thank youuu!! i love ur writing 🫶🏻🫶🏻

𐐪♡𐑂 jude bellingham x fem reader

𐐪♡𐑂 angsty but everything turns out okay 💕

it happened again.your heart was broken into pieces. all you saw when you closed your eyes was him and her. your boyfriend and the girl he told you “ not to worry about”. it happened on your one year anniversary of all dates too. you decided to surprise your boyfriend by baking him a cake and taking it over to his apartment, fantasizing about a romantic dinner and an intimate night in. all of this to find him entangled with another girl on his bed. you ran out of the apartment, after smashing the cake on the bedroom floor, ignoring your boyfriend yelling after you. after finding yourself on the dark street alone and heartbroken you could only think of one person to call. your best friend jude. you called him and he not only comforted you through the phone but also came to get you in his car, picking you up and taking you to back to his apartment. it was clear that you didn’t wanna go back to your place, the house filled with pictures of you and your boyfriend, the memories of the two of you suffocating the rooms. and it has been always like this, judes was your safe place, the place you went to when you felt lost or heartbroken. he would make you food or a cup of hot cocoa, and the two of you would sit on the couch for hours and hours, talking and talking. being with jude made your heart feel at peace, any anxieties vanished from his presence.

so there you were in his car, sitting in the front in complete stillness. you could feel the tension, the way jude was grabbing the wheel, the angry frown on his face. the entire 20 minutes to his house was spent in an utter silence, sometimes interrupted by your sniffles or judes angry huffing puffing. you had no idea what his problem was but frankly you had no energy to ask and get into another argument of the night. and anyways you were sure the minute you arrived to his house it would erupt, jude couldn’t keep thing’s inside for a long time. oh you were so right. the minute you stepped over the sill of his room, he started speaking. his words came out loudly, slurred, filled with anger and so much tension you felt like the room will blow up.

“ you know y/n, i would say im surprised but im really not. he’s been doing this to you ever since you got together. hes a piece of shit y/n! you know i always hated him, but you just kept going back to him. i.. i.. don’t even understand why. when i was here for you all along.. i listened to you and i.. was here you know. and i still am.” - his voice was at first angry and full or repressed feelings, yelling about how your boyfriend was a horrible person but towards the end he quieted down, the confession rolling from his tongue in a sweet shy way.

you didn’t know where to look, what to do. he was standing in front of you, and as corny as it sounds, he was there for you. you were slightly shaking, the thoughts running, racing through your mind. you felt your cheeks blush, your whole body on fire from the adrenaline. how could you answer him? nothing felt enough, no words could express how grateful you felt for him, how your heart broke hearing his confession. you couldn’t let him stand there anymore, his eyes full of sadness and desperation. you reached for him, standing on your tippy toes, your hands cupping his face as you lips pressed against his. he tasted sweet, his lips soft and welcoming. it was such a different feeling than kissing your boyfriend, this kiss left you speechless. his hands around your waist, his tongue overtaking yours, the small sounds he made, the whimpering and heat that filled the room. there was so much emotion between the two of you, neither of you could express by words but as you thumbled around, holding each-other, kissing hungrily, heading towards his bed, all the emotions seemed to flow and get in order.

[jude-thedude98]

Listen

2

Your

Heart.

PQ (Poetic Quotes)

By Cocoa the Poet and her daddy, Jude PoetAll

[xxsycamore]

❄️🎄 SWEET & SPICY WINTERTIME 🎄❄️ ► MASTERLIST

Here you can find all the works created for this challenge hosted by me! (Link to the challenge)

I’ll be updating this masterlist gradually as the challenge progresses! (If you’ve created a work in the duration of this challenge and before the deadline - January 20th - and you can’t find it here, don’t hesitate to let me know!) -> all works are explicit unless stated otherwise!

█ Touching under the blanket

(ikevil) A Little Game - Victor x Reader by @nightghoul381

(ikevamp) A Break to Warm Up - Leonardo x Reader by @fang-and-feather

█ Canceling plans to snuggle and fuck

(ikepri) It's Cold Outside - Leon x Reader by @nightghoul381

█ Cold skin, warm hands

(ikevil) Taste of Desire - Jude x Reader by @nightghoul381

█ The recipe says "Add a pinch of love"

(ikepri) Recipe of Love - Luke x Julie (OC) by @queengiuliettafirstlady

(ikepri) The Secret Ingredient - Nokto x Reader by @nightghoul381

(ikepri) A Pinch Of Love - Gilbert x Silvio x Reader by @scummy-writes

█ Hot cocoa tastes better when shared

(ikevil) Sharing Warmth - Ellis x Reader by @nightghoul381

█ Gift wrapping distractions

(ikerev) Giftwrap Mishap - Zero x Reader by @nightghoul381

(ikepri) Distractions - Gilbert x Emma by @eventinelysplayground

█ In front of the fireplace

(ikevamp) By Firelight - Theo x Reader by @nightghoul381

█ Long winter nights spent awake

(ikevamp) A Lovely Recipe - Jean x Julia (OC) by @queengiuliettafirstlady

(ikepri) Keep Me Warm - Jin x Reader by @nightghoul381

█ Quickies at the holiday party

(ikevamp) Charles x Pureblood Reader by @fang-and-feather

(ikevil) Heightened Needs - Liam x Reader by @nightghoul381

█ Naughty Christmas wish

(ikepri) His Christmas Wish - Clavis x Reader by @nightghoul381

[carylerxsecretsanta]

Christmas Reminisce

Written For: @lola-andheruniverse

Title:  Christmas Reminisce Author: @theresnosafeharbor4myships Rating: G Summary: Daryl and Carol spend a quiet night in France missing and reminiscing  A/N: Happy holidays, @lola-andheruniverse!! I hope you've found some joy, moments of peace, and pockets of rest this season. Merry Christmas, and I hope you enjoy this quiet fic with your requested moment of tenderness. :D 

Daryl bolted upright, heaving breaths through his nose as his dream world slipped away. He turned immediately to his left, but the spot beside him was empty.

“You okay?”

On his right, Carol stood at the window, the blue-white moonlight filtering in, lighting up her face just enough for him to see the concern written on it. She'd wrapped her too-large, calf-length sweater around her, her arms crossed to help ward off the cold seeping into the monastery walls.

“Mmm,” he hummed noncommittally, throwing the covers away from his legs, grateful to leave the nightmare that haunted him behind.

The chilly air immediately stole the warmth of the bed from him as he moved to stand behind her, and he wrapped his arms around her, hugging her back into his chest. They stood in silence for a few minutes, slightly swaying to a slow rhythm and staring out at the frigid night, the frosted ground, the icy waters.

He'd never intended to stay in France, but he was grateful it'd turned out the way it had or he'd be fighting off the winter elements in parts unknown, and Carol...well, she wouldn't be in his arms right now, he knew that much.

On a good day in the Before, he never could've imagined visiting France. And while it wasn't home and it'd been a treacherous journey through the country, being here in a once-famous monastery was something he and Carol would forever share: the two of them—having separately traversed an ocean—found each other and ended up here. Together.

“Wanna tell me about your dream?” Her voice came softly, quietly, and without demand.

He dropped a kiss into her hair just above her ear. “Some other time.” Another kiss. “Same thing got you up?”

Silence for a few beats, then she murmured a 'no' on a sigh. “Just thinking about home. Hoping Jude and RJ aren't giving Aaron and Gabriel too much trouble.”

He waited for her to continue, and when she didn't, he asked, “Sure that's all?”

He saw her quirk one side of her mouth up in the window's reflection. “Remember our Christmas at the prison?”

He nodded. “Yeah,” he answered, an unusual sense of nostalgia washing over him. He didn't often let himself think about what had been—either the good or the bad. Both hurt too much, and he had enough on his plate on any given day without the added weight of memories. But for a few moments, holding Carol and remembering together, he let himself reminisce. The tree Carl roped Glenn into cutting down. The ornaments the kids made to decorate it. The songs the others had sung in hushed tones that echoed throughout their cell block. The smiles and laughter that accompanied them more on that one day they'd chosen to celebrate as Christmas than any day that'd come before for their group. How he'd felt like an actual part of that group of people.

“We barely had anything to make it an actual Christmas celebration, but it worked somehow.” Carol paused, and he wondered how she remembered it, which moments had solidified in her mind. “Those ugly ornaments the kids made,” she chuckled. “That bitter chocolate Hershel found in the warden's desk drawer that we made into hot choco-yuck.”

Daryl huffed a laugh, remembering Carl's name for the silt water they'd all pretended was cocoa.

Carol didn't continue, and he waited, the cold seeping through his pajamas along his back a sharp contrast to the warmth he felt with her against his chest.

“I wonder what the kids are doing this year.”

He felt more than heard the heartache in her words and wished, like she did, that they slept at home, with the kids and the rest of their family nearby.

The Nest leaders had been promising the kids in the commune a Christmas celebration, albeit a simple one, for the past week. Daryl had ignored the hype, much like he'd done with Christmases in the Before, but he'd noticed Carol's contemplative nature earlier at dinner. He'd sat next to her, deftly fending off the few attempts at conversation others threw their way. He hadn't asked her what was on her mind as they'd readied for bed, instead waiting for her to reveal what bothered her. It didn't surprise him it had to do with the kids. He missed them too.

“Hey,” he said softly, unwrapping his arms from around her and gently turning her to face him. “We're gonna see 'em again.” He cupped one hand along the side of her neck, just below her ear, his thumb running back and forth along her jawline. “Soon as the snow melts and it's safe to sail again, we're goin'.”

She peered up at him, her eyes full of trust and tears. “I know. Just feels like forever away right now. We've been gone so long...”

“Sorry I got caught up in stuff I shouldn't have. I didn't mean—”

She raised a finger to his lips. “I'm not sorry I came looking for you. And certainly not sorry I'm here.”

He nodded, believing her even as guilt sat heavy in his gut.

With a hand to the back of his neck, Carol drew his face toward her until his forehead touched hers. He closed his eyes for a minute, listening to her breathe, feeling her fingers ruffle through his hair at the nape of his neck.

“I'm so glad I found you.”

Daryl felt the breath of her words against his face and tangle in his heart. “Glad you came lookin'.”

She eased away from him a few seconds later to look into his eyes. “It's a miracle we didn't miss each other.”

“Oh, I missed you plenty,” he stated, feathering her hair away from her forehead with one hand. A smile lit up her face. “More'an you know. Never shoulda left you.”

“Now's your chance to never do it again,” she teased.

“Yes, ma'am.”

Carol shivered, and Daryl rubbed his hands up and down her arms to lend her warmth. “Head back to bed?” he asked, head nodding towards the large bed with layers of blankets on it.

She took a final glace out the window at the cold night and nodded. “Yeah.”

She waited for him to settle into the mattress before sliding under the covers and pressing her back against his chest. He draped his arm loosely around her waist as she tucked the edges of the blankets around her body, sealing the frigid air out and cocooning them in warmth.

“G'night.”

“'Night.” Daryl dropped another kiss into her hair and closed his eyes contentedly, the best Christmas present he could ever wish for wrapped in his arms.

[vespen666]

Campbell Bain Headcanons

these are a bunch of headcanons i have about our favourite loonie!

before we get started I will say trigger warning for SH, Suicide, BD and fire. Also I'm autistic, so i've used some of my experiences as reference. And my friends are bipolar so also took reference from them.

so without further a-doo lets begin!!!

1- He's bisexual but he prefers male/gender-neutral partners.

2- He likes to listen to Queen and David Bowie

3-His primary love language is touch (he didn't get much physical affection when he was a kid) however he is demi-asexual

4-He absolutely adores when anyone plays with his hair or gives him head scratches (especially if they've got long nails

5-He's an insomniac. His sleep schedule is none existent, he sleeps whenever he feels like it wether that be at 5 in the morning or once every two days. He is rarely ever asleep before 1 am

6-He's got ADHD. All that energy and fidgeting doesn't come from being bipolar alone.

7-He loves doing arts and crafts at the asylum. The nurses sometimes use taking it away as a bribe to get him to take his meds if cocoa doesn't work

8-He knows a sh1t tone about stars and outer-space. if you point at a constellation and ask him to name it he'll tell you in an instant with its whole back story and everything.

9-He's got some PTSD from his childhood and watching Fergus jump off the roof.

10-His favourite movie is the breakfast club. He relates to John and Allison a lot and likes to reminisce of his short time in highschool and all the detentions he got.

11-He use to self-harm and still has the scars. He's not proud of it but when asked about it he'll just say "well thats life"

12-When he went to school he was the type of kid to turn up in pyjama bottoms and a hoodie, never pay attention but still somehow pass and he would skip class at least once a week

13-On the rare occasion that he does get to sleep, he moves around A LOT. full on starfish and blanket hogger, he also fidgets in his sleep

14-He quit cigarettes and started smoking w3ed. He said it was to "calm his nerves and help him focus on his creative flow" but eventually with Eddies help he quit that too.

15-He (albeit rarely) gets panic attacks.

16-He'll just randomly set small things on fire when he's bored. Sometimes he accidentally sets himself on fire

17- He hates loud noises unless he's the one making them. He loves to shout and blast his music so loud he can't hear his own thoughts but hates it when other people do it.

19- He loves soft things. He has about 15 stuffed animals at home (his favourite came with him to the ward) and is always wrapped up in a blanket when he watches tv or is reading. Any chance he gets he'll be cocooned in blankets and pillows

20-He either has a God-complex or hates him self to no end. There is no in between one minute he'll think he's the best person alive and the next he'll think everyone hates him.

21-When he was 16 (around the time he was diagnosed) him and his dad had a falling out and he tried to overdose. That was the reason he got admitted to saint Judes

22-He is fascinated by witchcraft but never really tried it himself, just likes doing research on it

23-He considered suicide after Fergus died but decided to continue on in his name and prove that loonies could get jobs and that being manic didn't define him

24-He once tried to die his hair green but decided he didn't like it so he went back to brown

25-His favourite bands are Nirvana and Green day

26-He likes comic books and his favourite hero is wolverine

thx for reading and I'm open to suggestions for Campbell.

[loserboyrobinwrites]

Chapter One: Wild Child

welcome welcome welcome this is the first draft of the first chapter of my novel!! it has NOT been edited. There WILL be mistakes. Apologies for the formatting, it's a little different on here than it is in word. Uhhh tw for the f slur!

This chapter is approximately 3k words! Enjoy!

Atticus

The first things I knew were wild. Wild grass under my feet, rivers gushing though the wild forests, the animals scurrying and hiding about my bare feet. 

   The moss cushioned me as I fell while learning to walk. 

   I knew it then and I know it now that the wild had something to say and something to teach.      My childhood home was in the middle of the woods, nestled against a river that tended to flood during the spring.  

   My mum’s name was Lyllian and my mama’s name was Jude. But I never called them that.  

   Our home felt soft and kind, with warm lights and fireplaces and hot cups of cocoa during the winter. I remember I’d climb over the ends of the staircase railings and on the back of the couch despite my warnings not to. 

   Mama always scolded me and told me I’d have to go to bed early if I kept climbing. I would just pout and poke my tongue out at her.  

   Mum told me stories about frogs in the rain and raised me on apple pies and smiles. She was soft but her hands were calloused from all the wood-chopping she did. She never let me touch the axe, much to my dismay. Mama would smile from where she would be cracking pepper over dinner. 

   Because we were so close to the wild, it was woven into my veins just as securely as the love I was raised on, and I took my first steps on moss near the river.  

   We spent a lot of time outside. We even walked to the school I spent my days at when I was old enough. And I would always insist on walking barefoot, even when I was old enough to put my shoes on by myself.  

   Mama smiled at it, but Mum would always sigh and give me a pointed glance. She made me put on my shoes before I went inside the school building.  

   I was a nightmare as a student. I would always be itching to run, and I’d take off my shoes at every chance I got. I would mimic the wolves I heard howling in the woods, and I would squawk back at the birds outside. I couldn’t sit still in class, and I scribbled on my worksheets. 

   My handwriting was horrifically bad, barely even legible. There were many parent-teacher meetings and extracurricular lessons so that I wouldn’t fall behind. Mum always made sure to sit next to me at the kitchen table and help me with my letters and words, and I remember she smelled of fireplace smoke and incense.  

    Mama would always ask me if I’d done my homework and every time I would say yes even if I hadn’t. And she’d hug me and her work shirt would smell of grease and metal but on weekends she’d smell of pine needles and the woodshed.  

~-~

  Once, there was a movie that I watched, but I don’t remember anything about it except the portrait of a snarling, seething wolf.     When I was seven or eight, a boy named Harlow approached me at lunchtime and said, in a rather rude tone, “Michael says you have faggots for parents.” 

   Now I didn’t know what that word meant, so I asked him, my feet digging into the soil. 

   “It means they’re...” he leaned in to whisper to me. “They’re gay.” 

   I looked at him quizzically, still not sure what he meant.  

   Harlow huffed. “You have two mums,” he said pointedly.  

   I took a bite of my sandwich and nodded.  

   Harlow’s eyes widened. “Really? It’s true?” 

   I frowned and nodded. I swallowed my mouthful of sandwich. “Is that bad?” 

   Harlow stared at me in shock. “Of-Of course it’s bad! How will you grow big and strong without a dad?” 

   At this, the image of the snarling wolf appeared in my mind and rage rushed through me. I’m not sure why. I hardened my gaze and Harlow seemed to stumble a bit.  

   And then I tackled him to the floor with a guttural growl. He screeched and all at once that rage disappeared, and I stood up, backed off and turned away, fleeing into the trees. 

   I didn’t look back. 

~-~

Mama sighed as I sat on my hands and swung my legs back and forth. The clock on the wall ticked incessantly, and the air conditioning had been turned full.     It was one of those units that swung the blast of freezing air back and forth, so every twenty or so seconds I would be hit with a chill.      Across the desk in front of me was Mrs. Hillywinkle, her wrinkled face scrutinizing the documents in front of her. Her computer whirred so loudly I thought it might take flight. 

   Mama had come from the shop early to come to this meeting. Usually Mum would do it, but she had been held up on something she called “investigative precautions”.      So there I sat, in the very uncomfortable wooden chair of the principal’s office, nervously swinging my legs.      Every so often the air conditioning unit would brush the papers of artwork on the wall with a rustling sound.      The wind outside howled up a ruckus, and I resisted the urge to howl back. Mama fiddled with the edge of her shirt that smelled of grease and metal. It was how I knew it was a Wednesday. Mama sighed and I pretended not to notice the pointed glare she shot at me.  

   Mrs. Hillywinkle seemed to have forgotten we were there.     Mama cleared her throat, and Mrs. Hillywinkle peered up over her half-moon glasses.     She put down the paper she seemed to think was so important and sighed. “Ms. James-Harriet.” 

   “It’s Mrs. James-Harriet, actually,” Mama said, frowning.      Mrs. Hillywinkle paused for a moment and narrowed her eyes at Mama. “Mrs. James-Harriet.”     Mama nodded.      Mrs. Hillywinkle paused again. Then, “I’m sure you know why you’re here.”     Mama shook her head. “I don’t.”     Mrs. Hillywinkle hesitated to give me a glance. “Your... Atticus here assaulted another student.” 

   Mama seemed to stop in surprise. She turned to look at me and for once I saw the brewing wild in her dark eyes. The moment quickly passed, and she turned back to Mrs. Hillywinkle. “He wouldn’t.” Her hands turned to fists around her trousers.      Mrs. Hillywinkle raised an eyebrow. “Well, he did. Tackled another student to the ground.”     Mama inhaled. “And what provoked this?”     “Nothing, the student says he was minding his own business and Atticus came out of nowhere and tackled him onto the ground—”     “That’s not true!” I snapped, rather out of the blue. 

   “Atticus,” Mama hissed.      I shook her off. “I was the one minding my business,” I corrected. “He came up to me and told me that I couldn’t grow big and strong because... because I don’t have a dad.” 

   Mama took a sharp breath.      Mrs. Hillywinkle raised an eyebrow. “And you tackled him to the ground?” 

   I nodded. “He deserved it.” 

   Mama sighed. “I’m so sorry, he’s not normally like this—” 

   Mrs. Hillywinkle held up a hand. “I’m sure. But we’re worried about his home life. Is there any reason you can think of that would cause him to react with violence?”     Mama was taken aback. I stiffened. Mama sighed. “No. We’ve never hit him or each other.”     Mrs. Hillywinkle scribbled something down.     I continued to swing my legs.   ~-~

I gripped mama’s hand tight as we began walking down the long dirt road to home.      She didn’t speak. I wished she did. She was like that sometimes, when she was angry with me.     She’d get all quiet and I wouldn’t speak either because if I did I was sure it wouldn’t end well.     I sighed.      She squeezed my hand. “I’m not angry at you.”     I nodded.     “I’m just frustrated. With that boy. And the world. Me and your mother have tried so hard to shield you from those who speak bad about us, but...” she trailed off with a sigh.     I nodded.      Her eyes seemed to glisten but not with tears, with something I couldn’t quite place. Her steps on the gravel seemed to be profound and strong. Her braids rocked with every step she took. I squeezed her hand.     She looked down at me and smiled.  

   I tried to smile back. 

   And that image of the snarling wolf appeared in front of my eyes again and I inhaled and stopped walking and my hand slipped from mama’s and I couldn’t shake the picture from my mind.      Mama turned and furrowed her eyebrows at me as I seethed, hands balled into fists.      It was like every part of me was alive, like every part I had ever pushed down had just somehow surfaced and was screaming rabid desires and I wanted to listen, but I didn’t know what they were saying, I just knew that they were loud and scary and feral and wild. 

   I wanted to listen to their screeching wild wants and needs but I couldn’t, I didn’t have the legs or the teeth or the speed or the nose or the right ears that I would need if I wanted to listen and obey and so I just stood there, on the dirt road with my mama in front of me, asking what was wrong.     And I wanted to growl and howl and screech at her just like those wild things were begging me to. 

   I met her gaze and she took a breath, like... like she was afraid of me and some part of me seemed to jump at the thought, seemed to gleefully cry out at the notion that I was scary that I was powerful that I was wild.  

   I seethed there on the dirt road, wanting to howl because those wild things begged me to, and those wild things were deep within the ground and the trees and they were in the air and I was them I was them and they were me. 

   “Atticus.”     The voice cut through like a knife and all at once everything stopped and I took a breath and I could see my mama again and she looked so worried. 

   I tried to breathe, I took long deep breaths as my mama’s hand was on my chest and she whispered to me softly about how it was okay and that I was going to be okay and whatever it was that was bothering me was gone now and I didn’t have to be afraid.  

   I breathed, long and low. The wild things stopped their screeching and the wild things weren’t in the trees and the wild things weren’t chasing me. 

   I was grounded and my mama was there with me.      “Atticus, are you okay?” Mama asked after a moment of just the wind in the leaves and my breathing.     I nodded.  

   And so, we carried on. To home. My feet were wobbling and my legs were shaking but I felt more alive than I ever had been.      Whole. 

   That’s what I felt. And Mrs. Hillywinkle couldn’t do anything about it because my mum would call her a word I wasn’t allowed to say.      I followed mama into the living room where the fireplace sat when we got home. She sat me down in the big armchair that was very squishy and kneeled in front of me.      She said, “Atticus, did that boy who you tackled say anything?”     I nodded. “Lots of things. He called you and mum a word that I don’t think he knew the meaning of.”     Mama tilted her head, braids rocking again. “And was that word?”     I hesitated. “I don’t know what it means either.”     Mama shifted closer. “I promise you right now, Ti-Ti, that if you repeat what he said I won’t be angry at you.”     There was silence. Even the trees seemed to be holding their breath. I stared at them through the large windows.      “Ti-Ti?” Mama asked.  

   I looked back at her. I hesitated. She blinked at me. I said, “he... he told me that I had faggots for parents.”     Mama’s eyes flashed. She hardened her gaze and muttered something under her breath.      “What does it mean?” I asked.      Mama sighed and looked at the floor. “It means someone who loves people who are the same gender as them. Like me, I’m a woman who loves another woman.”     I nodded. “I love you. And I love Oakley. What does that make me?”     Oakley was my best friend for ever and ever. We played together at school all the time and sometimes he would even howl at the trees with me. 

   Mama chuckled. “No, I don’t think it’s like that, Ti-Ti. The way that I love your mum is different to the way I love you. And I’m not sure you’ll experience that kind of love for a while yet.”       I nodded. “But what’s so bad about that word that Harlow said?”     Mama sighed. “It’s a word used to insult people like me. It shouldn’t be said by anybody, so I don’t want to hear you repeating it.”     I nodded again. “Okay.” 

   She turned back to me. “If he says it again, just tell me, alright? And I’ll make sure he doesn’t bother you.”     “Okay,” I said again.  

   Her braids shifted again as she leaned back. “Ti-Ti,” she started. “Back on the road.”     There was silence as she tried to formulate her words. “What happened?”     I wished the silence would come back. I didn’t want to tell her about the wild things in my head who screamed at me. I really, really didn’t. It felt... wrong, somehow. Like if someone knew about the screeching, they would hate me. Or throw me out, or make me scared of them. Or maybe the wild things wouldn’t come back, or they’d be there for every second. And both of those possibilities scared me.  

   I didn’t like being scared. I stared at her, my mouth open like I was going to say something, but the words died on my tongue. 

   Mama leaned forward, eyes open and ready to listen. “It’s okay, whatever it was. You can tell me.”     I huffed. “I don’t know,” I lied. 

   Mama raised her eyebrow. “You’re lying.”     “I am not!” I said indignantly.      Mama laughed. “Yes, you are,” she teased, leaning forward. “You’re lying and I know you are because you chewed on your lip before you answered.” She extended her hands to me and began to tickle my sides. “You’re lying, Ti-Ti,” she said as I burst out with laughter.     She leaned to blow a raspberry on my forehead as I squirmed away from her tickles.      And I think she forgot about the time on the road, and I think I did too. I think the wild creatures in my head were gone and they didn’t dare come back and ruin my mama’s love. 

~-~

Mum got home late that night, and she looked like a mess. Like she’d “been dragged through a bush by her ankles,” as Mama put it when she took mum by her hand and kissed her cheek.  

   I rushed up to her to show her the drawing I’d done of a wolf howling at the moon. Mum took it from me and admired it for a moment. A long moment. I waited, brimming with anticipation.      She looked to me over the paper with wide eyes. “You drew this?”     I nodded enthusiastically.     Mum gasped. “Why, I never thought I’d be in the presence of such an artist!” She exclaimed. “Come look at this, don’t you think the linework is just astounding?” she asked Mama.     Mama smiled. “Very. We ought to hang it up.” 

   Mum nodded, proud. “Immediately!”     And so she did just that. It was the centerpiece of the fridge. 

   I stared at it for a long while. It seemed so grand. Like the most important place a thing could be was in the middle of the fridge.      We lit the fireplace and drew the curtains, and I had a cup of hot chocolate while Mama placed another log on the fire and mum laughed when mama accidentally dropped the wood onto the floor with a thud.      I smiled and turned to glance at the fridge again. My drawing of the wolf. And then Mum sat next to me and pulled me to her side and I was greeted with the comfortable smell of fireplace smoke and incense.       Mama made a remark about stealing all the cuddles and joined mum on the other side of me and suddenly it smelled of pine needles and the woodshed and I was very safe and that’s what it smelled of, it smelled of safety. 

   I was safe with them and they would protect me and I would protect them and my drawings would be hung in the centre of the fridge and I would have cups of hot chocolate even when I was supposed to be asleep. And when I did fall asleep in my parents’ arms, I would always wake up in my bed the next morning without fail.   ~-~

   I have vague memories of being carried to my room and the soft voice of Mama telling me goodnight, but that’s all. I don’t remember when I fell asleep.     I remember my dreams, though. I’ve always remembered my dreams, and I’m not sure why. I remember almost every dream I’ve ever had. Most of them are nonsense, as dreams often are. But this one... this one was different. It was filled with screeching and howling and wolves snarling in my face and then I was the wolf snarling in my face.      I was the scary, not the scared, and I liked it.     I was angry and loud and hunting and screaming and I was obeying the wild things in my mind that told me to hunt and howl. The wild things in my mind didn’t sleep, and some things never do, and I don’t think I could either.  

   I was wild and I was hunting and I was the wolf snarling in my face and I was the screeching things in my mind and I was howling not just at the trees but I was howling at everything that was and that has been.      I woke up screaming that there were wild things in my head trying to hunt me. 

[nightghoul381]

Sweet and Spicy Wintertime Masterlist

1. A Little Game--Touching under the blanket + Red Ribbon – Victor (Ikevil)

2. It's Cold Outside--Canceling plans to snuggle and fuck + a single snowflake– Leon Dompteur (Ikepri)

3. Taste of Desire--Cold skin, warm hands + eggnog – Jude Jazza (Ikevil)

4. The Secret Ingredient--The recipe says "Add a pinch of love" + a cup of hot cocoa --Nokto Klein (Ikepri)

5. Sharing Warmth--Hot cocoa tastes better when shared + shared knitted scarf– Ellis Twilight (Ikevil)

6. Giftwrap Mishap--Gift wrapping distractions + homebaked cookies – Zero (Ikerev)

7. By Firelight--In front of the fireplace + pair of warm gloves– Theodorus Van Gogh (Ikevamp)

8. Keep Me Warm--Long winter nights spent awake + favorite blanket – Jin Grandet (Ikepri)

9. Heightened Needs--Quickies at the holiday party + snowball– Liam Evans (Ikevil)

10. His Christmas Wish--Naughty Christmas wish + sweater– Clavis Lelouch (Ikepri)

[virgoilluminati]

HELLO 👋

Welcome to my page! As you can see I’ve had a bit of a makeover. Mainly because ya gurl is avoiding the constant amount of studying I should be doing instead.

In all honesty I’m not sure what I am planning to do on this blog. It really depends on what mood I am in, but I am open to requests and I literally can write or make social media fanfics for anyone so please tag along for the journey. 🏷️

Some things that I would be open to do is:

Individuals:

HARRY STYLES 🍉🍒🌸

(Whenever, wherever I will do these cos he is the loml ❣️)

- Belongings (complete)

One shots:

- Sweet Cocoa - in which Harry feels guilty for missing his children’s milestones but tries to make it up to his daughter through sweet cocoa after a concert. (Fluff)

FINN COLE 🤙🏻🐳🦋

- a night at the BAFTAs (social media fic)

Jude Bellingham 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🫶🏻⚽️

World Class - complete

[bloodwiine]

closed starter for @mortiiferas ( jude ) location: a little cottage they've claimed as home

"You know, I'm just proud of you for even trying to reach out, but I think we both knew it was going to take time," Pippa offered cautiously, though she understood both sides, this was the one time she knew she ought to stay out of it. Even if it was going against her usual self. "If you'd like, we can bake cookies and have hot cocoa, I'm sure no one would say no to a blanket fort movie night...and if they do, there is the shed out back we can send them there or to their rooms."