#john laurens x you

[therealslimshakespeare]

Well here it is. Finished product. As soon as I saw the “she said yes” scene my mind went to another war and another set of bros who didn’t know what to do with all the love they had for each other in the times they were in. So here, have a whole Webweave out of Gale Cleven and John Egan to the revolutionary wartime letters of Alexander Hamilton and John Laurens. Whatever kind of love it is that they share, I want it.

“The value you had taught my heart to set upon you—”

[anthonys237thfreckle]

i am dreaming of writing on tumblr (like some 5-10 part series - mostly x reader, some character x character) and my first chance would be may 2025 :( blow up that inbox for requests/ideas until then! y’all have a lot of time. much love.

AND IM GONNA START MATCH UPS!! i check tumblr notifs sometimes, so i’ll def get those done faster. If you’ve given me an ask, it’s cause I wanna answer it in great detail which is why It’s still in my inbox.

Next inbox clearing - october 17.

[adorawritesalot]

I have cutely resurfaced, now, John Laurens (my beloved) and Alex Kralie with an s/o that's RICH rich, like comes from generational wealth and is very well known

I hope you've been eating or drank some water btw cause you deserve it <33

GUYS!!!! im back! exams are over, and i couldnt be happier. i am sorry to everyone whos adk has been ignored for a long time, ill be working on finishing them. send more! i love writing, epsecially for soneone i know will enjoy it!

also, if theres anyone who likes six of crows.... send that, too. ive been obsessed with them (and shadow and bone, obviously) and i would love to practice writing different characters!

i have drank and ate! thank u sm ily!!!! u deserve it too:) i hope its not a problem i made john in a modern!au:) this also might be a bit diff, idk. im very tired HAHA

please mention if u want headcannons or a oneshot!! i wouldnt want u to be unhappy with any of my works!

John Laurens

You met in college. He didn't like you very much at first- he thought you would be just a stuck-up kid, considering your family's status and wealth.

He could not be more wrong.

You got paired up with him for a project, and he knew that he was gone for the first time you smiled at him.

You quickly became friends. He introduced you to his friends (one of which you already knew; Marquis de Laffayette was quite known amongst the rich).

You started dating shortly after. A little later, you invited him to your house for the first time. He was very nervous, and not just because he would be meeting your parents. He didn't come from the wealthiest family, so this was a new territory to him. What if he said something wrong? Spilt something on himself, or worse, on something accidentally?

His worries quickly vanished when he saw your smile. That smile that could light up the room, the world. He was instantly calmer.

Well, after dating for a while, his birthday came up. Obviously, he told you not to go all out- he didn't want you to think he was with you just for money (even though you wouldn't even think of that).

But, you did go all out. You went on a picnic, went to see a movie, and then, after an eventful day of roaming the streets of New York, you came to your house.

He wasn't expecting anything else. He was wrong, though.

You bought him a turtle.

Alex Kralie

He didn't know you grew up rich. Or were rich, for that matter.

You've been already dating for some time when he started writing the script for Marble Hornets.

When he finished, the only thing that stopped him from actually filming was a crucial thing; he didn't own a camera. And he didn't have actors.

So, obviously, you bought him the best camera that you could get your hands on.

When he saw it, he bawled. And said a lot of thank yous and I love yous.

He asked you how did you get the money for that. In reply, you just told him your family has a literal crest and invited him to meet your parents.

The shock on his face when he saw your childhood house- no, mansion - was quite amusing. You would laugh if it wasn't for the nervosity of your boyfriend meeting your filthy rich parents.

Let's just say that you and your parents never stopped financing him and his ideas. They love him.

[pythiaswine]

CAN I JUST TALK ABOUT HOW BAD I WANTED LMM TO LEGITIMIZE LAMS but i kept being let down over and over again like ughhhh. first he gives the Angelica relationship a whole song and subplot and yes it was great, the whole musical's a lyrical, compositional, choreographed masterpiece BUT WE AREN'T HERE TO DISCUSS THAT. we are here to talk about how his source material was biased because Chernow gave breath to the Angelica thing, as improbable as it was (especially compared to the probability of the Laurens/Hamilton relationship? homophobia.) but then picture it, I'm a young, naïve teenager, I'm very fixated on lams and history, I loved the Hamilton musical, was a Hamilton teen and that part of me is irreparably burned into my brain. then LMM drops this sneaky little tidbit like the beacon of wisdom his fans see him as bc he wrote a historical self-insert fanfic for broadway, he says the Laurens/Hamilton relationship was real. great! but he didn't actually put it in the musical and that disappointed me. And damn, okay, he had a few lines here and there in the off-broadway version that were cut but maybe that wasn't his fault or maybe he planned on fleshing it out more and had to cut it down to make it more palatable for the people sponsoring his ride to broadway, a pathetic excuse but it could make sense. For all that, I could have forgiven, forgotten, etc etc... but I will NEVER forget naïvely believing during the year the Hamildrops were released that we'd finally get a Laurens/Hamilton song. In April it didn't happen, I thought okay, maybe pride month. Didn't happen in pride month. Didn't even happen in September or October, or as a last-minute gay reveal in December. It just didn't happen at all. We even got some covers of songs that already existed without notable variations on the lyrics and it's like... bro couldn't have done the bare minimum and had a Laurens cover of Satisfied? That's the moment I was let down for real. I had truly BELIEVED that because he said himself that the Laurens/Hamilton relationship was real, he'd actually follow through on something that could be digested by the fans more than a forgotten tweet. but damn it hurt. absolutely no queer representation in a musical about Alexander Hamilton. bro. to play devil's advocate, there is no way to "prove" hamilton wasn't straight (eye-roll) but it's not like Hamilton: An American Musical is historically accurate in the least. It's embellished, fun, glamorous. It paints people in their best (unless you're charles lee lol) considering it's about a bunch of people who definitely were not kickass abolitionist BIPOC, but because LMM found it important to represent America today, he made the cast very inclusive to cultures and ethnicities of those these historical figures oppressed. so why can't he fictionalize the story a bit more? it's not even FICTION BRO it's literally more provable (and less problematic and more interesting) than the Angelica/Hamilton affair so WHYYYY. all i mean to say is, i was very let down and i can't appreciate the musical or LMM the same as I did when i was younger because now it gives me the straight-man ick. the "yeah they were gay!" for ++ points with the lgbtq+ fans but a severe lack of action. i hate that shit. real allies would say "fuck your homophobia, i'm publishing my art as it is even if i face backlash and censorship," because that's how shit gets done. it really really let me down, that's all, good night.

[prettytragcdies]

[rafesfavgirl]

the palm of your freezing hand — r. cameron

part 1. part 2. this could technically be part 2 or 3, depending on how much of this little series you've read (or if you’re not into reading smut). either way, thank you for coming along for the ride. i hope you like it :)

❝ oh, goddamn my pain fits in the palm of your freezing hand ❞

pairing: friend!rafe x pogue!reader

context: it's been three weeks since you found out jj cheated on you, and a week since you hooked up with rafe.

words: 1.4k+

warnings: fwb situationship, mean!jj (just for the sake of the story, we all know he’s BABY), bitchy!kie (again, just for the story—i adore her), jealous!jj, slut shaming, a little bit of angst, a little bit of blood and violence, fluff. rafe being a menace too, lowkey

you sat on a log at a party in the boneyard—one that you let john b and pope convince you to go to (you felt bad for icing them out for almost three weeks now when they weren't the ones who screwed you over)—staring out towards the ocean in a red bikini top and a pair of jean shorts, sipping on some beer that john b had brought over to you in a red cup.

he was now occupied talking to some blonde touron, sitting up in a tree, while pope talked to some other girl by the keg, and jj and kie chilled with a few other pogues, his arm slung around her shoulder.

so much for claiming to love you—he was just on his knees begging you to forgive him last week. and now, he was here with your best friend—former best friend, anyway. the two of them really had no shame.

pulling your phone out of your pocket, you begin to text rafe.

you: please tell me you're on your way.

rafe: miss me already?

you roll your eyes at his response. last weekend, after your break up with jj, you made the somewhat idiotic decision to hook up with rafe at a kook party on figure eight. you're still not exactly sure how it happened, but the sex was good, so you've kinda formed a sort of friendship with him in a way—with benefits, of course.

the three dots appear again, signaling that he was typing something else, and you wait for the message to come through.

rafe: turn around.

you furrow your brow at the text, but do as you're told and turn around, only to find a smiling rafe standing over you���dressed in a ralph lauren, short-sleeve, white collared shirt and a pair of khaki shorts.

"hey pretty girl," he greets you as you stand.

little did you know, jj was watching from afar, his eyes focused on the way you throw your arms around rafe's neck in a hug, while his hands trailed around your waist to press your body against him.

"what the fuck?" jj mutters beside kie, who snaps her head towards him.

"what's up?" she asked.

"what is he doing here?" jj felt heat rise in his chest, his eyes narrowing at you and rafe.

kie furrowed her brows at him in confusion before following his line of sight to you and rafe a good distance away, you playfully pushing against his chest with a giggle.

"shit," kie says. "i didn't see that coming."

"yeah that makes two of us," jj slams his empty cup down on the ground and stands up without another word, beelining straight for you and rafe.

"so this is why you wanted to break up," you hear jj's familiar voice fill your ears, but it wasn't sweet and sarcastic as usual—it was bitter.

you shift your eyes towards him, causing rafe to turn too, to see what or who had just pulled your attention from him.

"excuse me?" you asked.

"rafe cameron, y/n?" he snarled. "seriously? i thought you knew better than that."

"clearly i don't, considering i trusted you," you spat, causing a scowl to fall over his sharp features. "and by the way, we didn't break up because i wanted to be with rafe. we broke up because you cheated on me."

that makes rafe snap his head towards you—he knew that your relationship didn’t end on good terms, but you never really told him why. "he cheated on you?" 

"with kiara."

a scoff mixed with a snicker leaves rafe's mouth as he looks at jj. "you're an even bigger idiot than i thought."

"look, shut the fuck up, man, a'ight?" jj motions a hand at him. "this isn't about you. this is about you." he turns to you again. "you're really slutting yourself up for this asshole?"

"better than slutting myself up for a cheater," you retort. "and in case you haven't noticed jj, we're broken up. what's it to you if i'm hooking up with someone else?"

"and she is, by the way," rafe throws jj a wink and smirk. "you really fucked up. i mean, really fucked up. the way she feels bro? i don’t know how you coul—"

"shut up, man," jj was getting riled up now, a hand coming up to push rafe back, a deep chuckle falling from rafe's lips as he used both his hands to push jj back.

that's enough to push your ex-boyfriend to the edge as he comes at rafe, causing him to trip over a skinny log as both of them tumble onto the sand. the noise from the tussling only pulls attention from everyone else, john b and pope immediately running over to break the two hot-headed blonds apart.

you really had a type, huh?

"what did you do?" kie comes up beside you, along with a few pogues, kooks, and tourons—who had now formed a makeshift half-circle around the scene.

you look at her, more pissed off at her accusation than rafe and jj fighting. "what makes you think i did anything?"

"you usually always do," she says.

you cross your arms and scoff. "you're one to talk."

"and what's that suppose to mean?"

"it means you were supposed to be my best friend, kiara," you tell her. “and not only did you screw our friendship over, but you did it by fucking my boyfriend. no wonder sarah cameron dropped your ass.”

she purses her lips at you, upset by your mentioning of sarah’s name. “don’t act as if this is just all on me,” she argued. “you were the one who weaseled your way in, and stole him from me.”

“stole him?” you asked, taken aback. she was the one who set you up with him in the first place. “you’ve clearly reached different levels of delusional.”

“you think i'm delusional?" she spat, crossing her arms. "you're hooking up with rafe cameron. do you really think you'll get him to fall for a pogue like you?"

before you could even answer, rafe separates the two of you, bumping into you both as jj pushes him back, and you reach out to steady him.

"you think i'm scared of you, man?" jj shouts at him, john b holding him back.

rafe chuckles and wipes at the little bit of blood beside his now busted lip with his thumb. "i think you should be."

"get your fucking boyfriend, y/n!" jj yells, his eyes shifting from rafe to you.

"you got it," you nod at him with a smile, just to piss him off more—rafe wasn't your boyfriend, but he didn't have to know that. "you wanna get out of here?" you tilt your head up at rafe, who turns his head towards you and smiles. 

"lead the way, doll."

you do as he says, giving kie a small smirk as you walk past her and the makeshift crowd that had formed, everyone's eyes on the two of you.

"so… your boyfriend, huh?" rafe swings an arm around you and squeezes you to his side.

"chill, cameron," you laugh, pushing him away from you playfully. "i only said that to piss him off."

"so i'm just a toy to you then, is that what this is?" he asked, a small smile pulling at the corner of his lips as you both stop by his truck.

"that depends…" you trail off and turn to face him, your back resting against the passenger door of his truck. "am i just a toy to you?"

"i'm not sure yet," he shrugs, honestly. "i wouldn't have just taken a bloody lip and sand stains on my polo for anyone though."

you giggle and bring your thumb up to swipe at the beige-colored stain on his white shirt. "yeah, sorry 'bout that."

"no worries," he shakes his head, his eyes locking with yours. "i can think of one or two ways you could make it up to me."

"oh, is that so?" you kink a brow at him. "because i can tell you right now i don't have a hundred dollars to spare for a brand new ralph lauren polo shirt."

he leans a hand against his truck, beside your head, and closes the distance between you. "and who said that's what i wanted?"

you tilt your head to the side, an amused smile on your face. "then what did you have in mind?"

"let me take you out on date," he says. "a real one."

part 4.

writing rafe being soft for the reader is literally my favorite thing ever.

reblogs and comments are deeply appreciated <33

click here to be added to my tag list!!

tags: @sublimepenguinpeach-blog @immyowndefender @chiaraanatra

[timetravellingkitty]

SAPPHIC ARTISTS TO LISTEN TO

(instead of writing your 69th essay about how Taylor Swift is a closet lesbian)

Starting off with my holy trinity:

Rina Sawayama (she/her, bi/pan): if you follow me you're probably aware of what a huge Rina fan I am. Lots of pop and rock, with a chunk of her earlier songs being R&B. Her debut album SAWAYAMA (my favourite album of all time!!) was her major breakthrough moment as it received critical acclaim and her sophomore album Hold the Girl made her the highest charting Japanese artist in the history of the UK. Known for her musical versatility, she made her acting debut in John Wick 4. I recommend: Cherry, Frankenstein and Bad Friend

Janelle Monáe (she/they, bi/pan): pop, funk, neo-soul and psychedelic. They have an entire series of concept albums about an android named Cindy Mayweather (her ALTER EGO?!) as she commits the crime of falling in love with a human. Lots of social commentary. Her album Dirty Computer comes along with a narrative film and a book taking place in its world. She's starred in movies like Antebellum, Glass Onion and Moonlight. I recommend: Electric Lady, Django Jane and Pynk

Raveena Aurora (she/her, bi): Experimental pop, R&B and soul. Her second album Asha's Awakening is a concept album following the journey of Asha, a Punjabi space princess, as it explores Aurora's South Asian identity and past relationships. Such a beautiful and soft voice to die for. I recommend: Headaches, If Only and Kathy Left 4 Kathmandu

Moving onto some other artists I like:

Boygenius: a band comprising of three sapphic women- Phoebe Bridgers (indie darling™), Lucy Dacus and Julien Baker (the first two are bi while the third is a lesbian). Indie, folk and alternative rock. Very melancholic. I urge you to check out their individual projects too (especially Phoebe's, I love her Punisher album). I recommend: Emily I'm Sorry, Satanist and True Blue

Kelela (she/her, queer): R&G, electronic and alternative R&B. Her debut EP Hallucinogen covers the beginning, middle and end of a relationship in reverse chronological order. Her second album Raven showcases Black futuristic art, which I fuck with. I recommend: Contact, The High and Bluff

Zolita (she/her, lesbian): dark-pop, R&B and electropop. She incorporates witchcraft into her music and mvs. She literally has an EP called Sappho what more could you want? I recommend: Holy, Ashley (the sapphic Speak Now) and Bedspell

Victoria Monét (she/her, bi): pop and R&B. She's written songs for artists like Ariana Grande (7 Rings) and Chloe x Halle (Do It). Go stream her Jaguar EP you will thank me later. I recommend: Touch Me (erotic sapphic song), Cupid and Love U Better

And finally some honourable mentions (can't make this post too long now can I): mxmtoon, Michelle Zauner, Arooj Aftab, Sir Babygirl, Dodie, Chloe Moriondo, Lauren Jauregui, Baby Queen, Sara and Teagan, The Butchies, Sofya Wang and Melissa Etheridge

[goldenroutledge]

par for the course

pairing ⤜ rafe cameron x fem!kook!reader

word count ⤜ 3.2k

summary ⤜ in which you forgive your childhood nemesis, rafe cameron.

a/n ⤜ season one reminiscent? i’ve had a draft of this piece forever so i decided to finish it!

rafe cameron masterlist

© goldenroutledge || do not plagiarize, repost, or translate my work in any way

The slam of your bedroom door echoes through your house and the fall onto your bed is cushioned by the decorative throw pillows on top of it, drowning out your exasperation for the moment. A deep exhale fell past your lips as reality sunk in. The nags of your parents reached an all time high so far this summer, as they went on and on about how you were going to be stuck in the house with nothing to do.

Unfortunately, your explanation didn’t cut it. In the back of your mind, you were well aware that your friends would be busy doing their own things. You just chose not to believe it until it came true. John B and JJ became camp counselors for some group of kids over the summer, those poor kids. Pope decided to fill his free time with summer classes, and Kiara was tied up at The Wreck. And with John B going away, Sarah didn’t have a reason to stick around either, much to your displeasure. She’d decided to visit her cousins overseas. Not that you really blamed her, or any of your friends for that matter.

But it was slightly embarrassing to have nothing to say when it was your turn to reveal your plans for the next few months. Any other time, you’d always assumed your plans would be with any one of them.

And now, your problems were a whole lot bigger. Judging by your lack of plans, your parents went ahead and made some for you. And with the last person you would’ve wanted to spend your summer days— or any days at all— with, Rafe Cameron.

Both of your fathers had worked together in the past, and they still kept a friendship because of it. If that’s what you call two middle-aged businessmen drowning in drinks and making small talk at the occasional kook event.

To put it simply, Rafe had it out for you. Just the mention of his name made you shudder; your horrific childhood experiences with the boy forever carved in your memory.

His bratty behavior towards you began at about age 9 or 10. For instance, when you wouldn’t budge off of his favorite swing at the park. It would be impossible to forget how he popped one last bubble from his piece of bubblegum, faded pink and chewed thin, before wading it up and planting it right in your hair.

You lunged off the swing towards him immediately, screams of terror piercing the serene island air. He ran in circles, cackling mischievously as you chased him. All for Rafe to ‘take back’ his spot on the swing while he had you distracted.

As years went on, the memory became less and less vivid— except for that moment when he popped in another piece of gum, one bigger than all his teeth combined, before shouting: “Thanks for keeping’ it warm for me.”

And without an inkling of remorse, he began swinging gleefully while you ran to find your mother, hot tears cascading down your cheeks. The tear stains remained for another day or so. The sadness and frustration was simply too much for your nine year old self to handle. Not to mention the wad of gum that had to be cut out of your hair later that day. And it was all Rafe’s fault.

So it couldn’t be chalked up to anything less than betrayal, really. For your parents to coordinate summer golf lessons with your childhood nemesis. It was pure treachery. Especially after your strong argument of course, not failing to mention the dreaded gum incident. Only to be told off by your mother, as she assumed any child of Ward’s would mature into nothing short of an upstanding citizen. If she only knew.

Days later, you were throwing on a Ralph Lauren polo and a tennis skirt to match, hating every minute of it as you knew what was to come. You couldn’t deny how the material hugged your body just right; and a shred of your subconscious hoped that Rafe would notice too.

For no reason other than revenge, of course. How dare he terrorize you as a child and not be consumed with regret years later? His unforgivable acts couldn’t go unpunished.

Grabbing your keys and phone, you sped off in your car without so much as a goodbye to your mom before leaving. No amount of time could help you process what you were in for, and no amount of forethought would make this reunion any more bearable.

-

Scanning the cream colored walls of the Island Club, it didn’t take long to spot the tall Cameron leaning up against one of its pillars, scrolling on his phone with an expression of pure boredom. His foot tapped the floor occasionally, his eyes lifting every minute or so in search of you.

Just two taps on his shoulder was all it took to grab his attention. Rafe’s lips spread into a smirk just as quickly as he turned around to meet your irritated gaze. That stupid smirk, one you knew all too well.

“Long time no see, Y/n. Missed me?”

“Not a chance in hell. I’m here against my will.”

“Yeah, right. I bet you were just begging for a chance to see me again.” Rafe whines dramatically.

“Delusional as ever, huh, Rafe? I guess some things never change.”

“Childish as ever, huh, Y/n? Good to know we agree about something. And to think I had hope that you’d leave the hostility at home.”

“Didn’t you get suspended from the Academy for fighting? Twice?”

His expression shifts from smug to scowl.

“That was a long time ago. You ready to get started or what?”

You smile at him with faux innocence, glad to have landed a punch in this endless match between you two.

“Ready as I’ll ever be.”

—

The silence remained as thick as molasses, tension lingering that not even the sharpest of machetes could slash through.

Rafe steered the golf cart in silence, movements hasty and abrupt as an expression of his frustration. Your memory wasn’t as short as he’d expected; and now he was subjected to a summer of what he anticipated to be vengeful torture.

Lost in thought, he came to a stop at your destination. And by the looks of it, you were more than ready, willing and able to carry on without him as you began teeing up.

“Aren’t I supposed to be teaching you how? Isn’t that the whole reason why we’re here?”

With a sigh, your eyes darted to the clear blue sky, silently praying to a higher power to keep you sane. “I’ll ask for your help when I need it.”

You resume lining up your footing and the club with the ball, envisioning your swing before Rafe interrupts once again.

“Why bother showing up here if you’re gonna act like a bitch?”

“I was sent here against my will, remember?”

“So you say.”

“And I’m not a bitch. Not to those who don’t deserve it.”

“I couldn’t tell the difference.” Rafe scoffs. “And I never said you are a bitch, I said you’re acting like one.”

A cold chuckle makes its way out of your throat at his blatant contradiction. “You do not wanna go there with me, Cameron.”

After the mumble fell from your lips, you were set on taking a swing at the golf ball. Until Rafe opened his mouth once again, as if he was just waiting for you to swing, to piss you off even further. Provoking you at this point.

“Actually, let’s go there. I’d love to go there. Please enlighten me as to why you feel entitled to be so rude to me. Especially since I am the one doing you this little favor, aren’t I? Giving you a break from those losers on the Cut you love so much.”

“Isn’t it disrespectful to talk when I’m trying to hit a ball?” You query, quoting his very own words during an encounter with the notorious blond pogue. “Learn some etiquette, my friend.”

“Pathetic. So it’s Maybank? He’s been whispering in your ear? What, is he your boyfriend?”

“As if I haven’t experienced enough of your obnoxiousness firsthand. Trust me, I hate you plenty on my own. And he’s not my boyfriend, idiot.”

Rafe raises an eyebrow, his smirk returning at your defensiveness. “Though from what I hear you have some ‘losers’ of your own these days. Barry, isn’t it? Would be a shame if Uncle Ward found out.”

Rafe rolls his eyes at your disingenuous mention of his father. Sure, your fathers were somewhat close friends, but for some reason, it made his blood boil. “What’s it to you? Don’t tell me this is your attempt at blackmail.”

You shrug, grip still firm on the golf club. “Not necessarily. Have to admit it does feel good to get under your skin, though.”

“Touché.”

—

You moved through the golf course rather quickly, nearing its end. Both of your intentions were evident that you were eager to get home, and best of all, away from each other. Rafe slides into the driver's side of the cart, but doesn’t pull off immediately.

“You never actually answered my question, by the way. About why you’re being such a pain in the ass to me.”

You stop scrolling on your phone to look at him, trying to understand his purpose for bringing this up again. “You don’t happen to have some sort of short-term memory loss, right?”

“You said you hate me plenty on your own. But what fucking reason have I ever given you to?”

“Oh?”

“I told you to go there, didn’t I? I’m giving you a chance to let out your grievances. And that’s one more than I should, you know patience isn’t my strongsuit.”

“Can’t a girl just hate Rafe Cameron with no strings attached? I’m sure it’s not the first time.”

He looks over to you, blue eyes staring into yours. “You and I both know there’s always strings attached.”

“What can I say, Cameron? Guess it’s just par for the course. Or are you so desperate to know because you crave my validation?”

“What can I say, Y/l/n? I guess you wouldn’t be able to understand what it means to learn from your mistakes.”

“You’re full of it.”

“No more than you are, peach cake.”

“Just drive us back to the club already.”

“Not until you confess.” He protests, dangling the keys in your face before sliding them into his pocket. Rafe leans back, unintentionally manspreading as he does so, and drapes an arm over your shoulder. “We could be here all day.”

The exasperation was pretty much dripping off of you. His antics felt so familiar in the most intense way possible, and it made you want to scream. He was the same Rafe bullying you out of the playground a decade ago. The same Rafe you were now wondering had you misjudged. Or judged a little too harshly over some measly childhood rivalry.

“Primrose Park.”

“Excuse me?”

“Primrose Park.” You reiterate. “Don’t feign amnesia. I know you know.”

“How could I forget? I was the king of that place for years.”

“King? More like dictator.”

He shrugs. “I had a delicate ego back then.”

“As well as no patience or manners. If I didn’t know any better I would’ve thought you were raised by wolves.”

Rafe chuckles, amused by your memory of him as a child. “Blame it on Uncle Ward.”

“Sarah and Wheezie were always sweet as pie, so I don’t know if that’s fair.”

“Probably just caught me on a bad day, Y/n. I, too, am sweet as pie.” He defends, eyes twinkling as he smiles.

“Like hell you were! Do you recall wading up your gum and sticking it in my hair? Does that ring a bell?”

His eyebrows furrow as he recollects the memory.

“When we were kids at the park, you got all pissed that I wouldn’t give you a turn on the swings, so you spit your gum in my hair.”

He chuckles at first, but his laughs grow much louder as he ponders the memory.

“It’s really not that funny, Rafe. My mother had to cut that chunk of gum out of my hair.” You remind him. “You’re lucky I don’t shave your damn head right now!” You take a swat at his cap, knocking it to the ground as he’s struggling to get his laughter under control.

“And after all these years you never forgave me? It’s been decades, Y/n.”

“You never apologized.”

“Well I’m sorry, now. If that means anything.” He mumbles the last part, apologies being a foreign art to him. “But you should be thanking me, actually. You have no idea what you were in for had you stuck around.”

“What?”

“Henry Haberstroh. He was gonna give you another one of those stupid bouquets of weeds.”

“The dandelion bouquets?” Your mouth hangs open at the revelation, remembering the boy with an incessant crush on you. A crush so intense in fact that he wouldn’t stop giving you bouquets of dandelions he’d picked from the grass— not until you’d agreed to a playdate with him despite being painfully uninterested.

“The gum idea was more of a last resort but I thought you might wanna get out of there. I mean, dandelions? You’re allergic to bees.”

“And how do you know this exactly?”

“As King of Primrose Park I was privy to information. And was subtlety ever Henry’s thing? The kid was a blabbermouth. He never shut up about you.”

“Well I must say I’m impressed, Cameron. That’s quite a scheme you pulled off. Not that you’re forgiven or anything. But Henry was a creep.”

“Couldn’t take a hint to save his life, either. I don’t think I’ve seen you run away from someone so fast, not even from me.” Rafe teases, nudging your arm with his as you giggled.

“The bees!”

Rafe gives you a look of disbelief, knowing damn well it wasn’t the pollinated dandelions you were running from.

“Seriously, I’m really allergic! But you already knew that?”

“What kind of secret admirer doesn’t know his admiree’s allergens?”

His blue eyes lock with yours, smiles replacing the scowls on both of your faces from earlier. You raise an eyebrow at him in question.

“Shame on Henry.” Rafe critiques, realizing the implication of his words.

“Yeah. Shame on Henry. But I wouldn’t call us even quite yet, so sleep with one eye open just in case.”

The two of you share a genuine laugh for the first time all day, before Rafe begins driving towards the next hole.

“Remind me to lock my windows when I get home.”

—

You move towards your ball once again, but gaze at your target uneasily. Maybe you still had a thing or two to learn about the sport. Rafe leans up against the cart, arms crossed and biceps stretching the fabric of his shirt much thinner. The tension was almost gone in comparison to how you started the afternoon. Almost.

Now looking at Rafe, it felt different. How could you be angry anymore? Holding a vendetta against him took too much energy at this point when it was no longer warranted.

To your luck, you could excuse the fiery feeling rising to your cheeks as a result of the sweltering sun. No matter how hard you tried, your former memory of him melted away. You could no longer see Rafe as the pesky little boy he once was. Perhaps a symptom of heat stroke, you thought. Hopefully it would be temporary, you still had the whole summer with Rafe ahead of you.

“I almost forgot you’re supposed to be teaching me how to play this joke of a sport.” You gripe. “Will you show me?”

Rafe bites his bottom lip to avoid cracking a smile. That you had finally cracked, giving in to ask him for help. “That’s what I’m here for.”

Leaning off the cart, Rafe saunters over to you. “I need you to start on your form first. May I?” He offered, gesturing to set his arms over yours for some adjustment.

With a slow nod, you decide to taunt him further. He’s not gonna get away that easy. “You’re not chewing any gum are you?”

“No, Y/n.” He responds, and you can just hear the smirk in his tone. Hearing your name roll off his tongue makes your stomach flutter— now feeling his body against yours, the heat increasing tenfold.

“Hold the club firmly, and swing through the ball, not at the ball.” He guides your arms with his, mimicking how to prepare for a swing. As his head peers over your shoulder, you swear you hear his breath hitch at the faint aroma of your perfume. Rafe almost seems relaxed, doing the movements with you a few times over again before stepping back to let you try it.

You do just as he taught you, and Rafe repeats the instructions under his breath as he watches you take your swing.

From the woosh of the ball leaving the grass, your eyes follow as it lands in a close proximity to the cup. With a scream of victory, your hands collide with Rafe’s in a high five, before wrapping your arms around his neck, his hand instinctively falling to rest at your waist as he pulls you into a hug. “Atta girl!” He marvels.

“I did it!” You cheer, smile beaming off your face. Once the initial shock wears off, you realize whose arms you’re engulfed in, stepping back from the embrace abruptly. “Uhm- I’m sorry. I didn’t…” You begin, trying to explain yourself and your sudden outburst of physical affection.

“Don’t apologize.” Rafe assures, reaching his hand out for yours. You accept it with a shy smile. “You did great for your first big swing. Can’t say I’m surprised, though, you do have one hell of a teacher.”

“He’s not bad.” You confess. “Actually, better than I thought.”

Rafe quirks an eyebrow, his cerulean orbs gazing into your eyes, finding for once they held not one drop of bad blood while looking back at him. He steps forward, the space keeping you both apart dwindling. “Yeah?”

“Yeah. Don’t tell him I said that, it’ll go straight to his head.”

His eyes flicker from yours then to your glossed lips, which is the final straw before giving into your growing urge to kiss him. Rafe’s free hand clings to your cheek immediately as he deepens the kiss; as if a magnetic pull between you two had clicked.

Pulling away, the surprise on Rafe’s face is evident, but the confidence in his voice made it impossible to tell a difference. “I’m glad to see you came to your senses and forgave me.”

“Jumping to conclusions already? What makes you think you’re forgiven?”

Rafe shrugs, and that familiar look of pride returns to his expression. His thumb grazes across the apple of your cheek, and his hand gives a gentle squeeze to your waist. “Call it a wild hunch.”

taglist @ilovejjmaybank @missevi @nxsmss @cameronsrafe @msgorillagripcoochie @bibliophilewednesday @tovvaa @rudybarnes @annab-nana @reawritesthings @moniamaybank @outerbankspreferences @laneylaneylaney @jjpouggues @milkiane @mildkleptomaniac @whcclxr @mrs-cameron @alanniys @amourology @luversgirl @fallingwallsh @scenesofobx @bradleybeachbabe @chrisevansfuturewife @drewstarkeysbitchh @littlementalpolaroids @destourtereaux @iammirrorball

[buggybambi]

Lip x reader best friends to lovers where reader was in a relationship with a guy that everyone knew was a jerk besides her. She has like prom or if in college some like sorority event or something and like hours before it starts, she finds out he was cheating and dumps him… she thinks she’s going to have to go alone, and then right as she’s all sad and getting ready to leave, lip shows up all dressed up nice with flowers ready to be her date 😭 like it would be so precious because he usually has this like “cool guy” exterior but would so totally do anything for someone he loves 🥹

-🐻

soft shell | lip gallagher

omg my love thank you for requesting this!! i hope my writing does your amazing request justice 🫶🏻 | wc: 387 - nav post

Lip Gallagher was not the person you had intended on seeing tonight, not this early anyway. Your plans for the evening had been simple - go to prom, have fun with your boyfriend, then meet with Lip and eat fast food while you talk.

The only problem with your plan of having fun with your boyfriend was he already had plans. In bed, kissing another girl. A girl who wasn’t you.

Lip had been your best friend for years. He had been your solace, your rock, your everything. He was the first one you told about your boyfriend, John.

Your friends had been trying to convince you all night to come to prom anyway. Forget about the scene you just witnessed and have fun with them instead. But that was easier said then done.

You weren’t expecting the knock on your front door, pulling you out of your sobbing. Wiping your cheeks dry from any tears, you slowly open the door. Half of you was expecting John, begging for your forgiveness. The other half knew that wasn't going to happen.

Maybe now that you and him had broken up, you were starting to see the warning signs. You knew none of your friends liked him, most of all Lip who had a grimace anytime John invited himself to your plans.

Speaking of Lip, he's on your doorstep. In a suit, holding a bouquet of flowers. He turns, smiling and looking you up at down. There's a fascination in his eyes, like he's admiring you.

"Lip? Why are you here?" You question, your mutual friends had to have been talking about you and John breaking up and Lip had to have heard about it, right?

"I'm taking you to prom. Lauren called." Lauren, one of your close friends who happened to know Lip. "She told me about what that douche did to you. I'll kick his ass if you want-" He begins, but your laugh cuts him off.

"Lip. You got dressed up and came here just for me?" You ask through giggles, tears forming in your eyes as you wrap your arms around him. "Thank you. I really.. I really appreciate it." Translation: I think I'm in love with you.

"Just doing what I can." He says softly as he hugs back. Translation: I love you, too.

[dorkszn]

— letting you do their hair

— thomas j, alexander h, and phillip h x gn reader, john laurens x masc reader

+ black coded reader for thomas and john! modern-ish au!

PHILLIP H !

✩ he loves letting you do this hair. sometimes you don’t even have to ask, he’ll ask you.

✩ he only trust you and his parents to wash it and take care of it

✩ you style it a lot for him and eliza loves it

✩ tender headed as fuck

✩ if someone flirts with him in public, especially if they bring up his hair, he’ll just go on and on about you

✩ “oh my hair? yeah it’s nice, ain’t it? my (s/o) did it. Aren’t they so skilled?”

✩ you teach him how to braid his hair and style it the way you do so he can do them himself if there’s a time you’re not around

☆ watching your favorite shows 🤝 washing and drying his hair

THOMAS J !

☆ he is so protective of his hair. like he’s the only one allowed to touch it

☆ so obviously it took you a lot of begging and convincing but he eventually gave in

☆ he’ll make snarky comments and act like a baby when you first wash his hair or attempt to style it but a little pop with the comb gets him to shut up

☆ he almost fell asleep the first time you braided his hair, but he likes to pretend it never happened

☆ so embarrassed to ask you to wash his hair and you can’t help but tease him for it

☆ after a while, he had you braiding his hair once a week for an extra curl

☆ you guys have matching bonnets

☆ he will literally call James mid hair session and just start talking about the government with him

☆ he was very skeptical about your products but eventually they become the only thing he uses

ALEXANDER H !

☆ he was genuinely surprised when you asked him to do his hair

☆ he hadn’t had anyone to do it or take care of it for years, especially since his mother passed

☆ “you’d do that for me?” he’d question, genuine shock on his face

☆ and it takes all of both of you to not start crying when you do take care of his hair

☆ the first time you washed it for him was the most relaxed you’d ever seen him

☆ it was the most loved he’d felt for a while

☆ then there were times were you just played in his hair

☆ whether we was working or just watching tv, you were putting silly little styles in his hair. and it he loves it. he thinks it’s adorable.

☆ some mornings, he ask you to put his hair up for him or slick it back for him just so he can have the best start to his day

☆ his hair was very first thing he asked you to do when he came back from war

☆ scalp massages >>>

☆ they’re one of the only things that convince him to leave his office, just for a little bit

JOHN L !

☆ after he meets you, he refuses to do his hair unless you’re away on a trip

☆ he whines and pleads, making an excuses on “how you do so much better” and “how loved it makes him feel” while giving you kisses

☆ but if you’re truly tired, of course he’ll give you a break

☆ you came home once and found him wearing your bonnet/durag

☆ you also do most of his haircuts

☆ he doesn’t mind his hair growing out but he knows it’s getting too long when you start beating him while play fighting

☆ to him if you’re winning, his hair is messing with his vision and it’s a “handicap”

☆ definitely gets popped with the comb everytime you do his hair

“john, could you turn your head just a little bit?” you question, your frustration already growing. he couldn’t help but tease you constantly, it was in his nature. he slightly turns his head with a small smirk on his face, knowing he was pissing you off.

“john, don’t play with me right no—“ you cut off your words when john grabs you by the waist and pulls you in and onto his lap. his hand gripping the outside of your thigh to support you as you straddle his legs.

“this angle good enough for you?” he asks, giving you his typically stupid grin. you can’t help but softly smile as you look at him, your previous anger from before leaving.

“t’s fine, i guess.” you shrug before going back to attempting to cut his hair.

“see? why let anyone else do my hair when i can have you do it for free and get a lap dance at the same time?” he says nonchalantly, continuing to scroll on his phone. his free hand caress your thigh and slithering back to ass.

“john, i swear you’re going to wake up bald one day.”

[wyrmarchives]

Main | Navigation | COD Writing | Send a Request

Tag List! Google Form, doesn’t collect emails

COMING SOONISH!

On the Side Masterlist

John Price x Reader (angst)

MDNI

Triggers: Age Gap (Price: 37, reader in early 20s), Cheating, lying, fighting (verbal, and shoving)

May add more triggers later

Summary: Reader is the side piece, and John?… God he’s a dick. A real piece of work. A liar, a cheater, and god dammit… a good man lover.

Snippet:

I really fucking hate her… She’s ditzy, loud, chatty, platinum blonde. She’s got those baby blue eyes. She’s thin, she doesn’t fit your sweater- swims in it like a teenage love story. I wanna gag… why does she smile at me?

Did you not tell her what we do?

Part:

Prelude: Celebrations

God, I hate her (She’s all I wanna be, Tate McRae)

I see you (If you think I’m pretty, Artemas)

I know what I am (Bad Idea, Girl In Red)

When the bend breaks (Dark Red, Steve Lacy)

Is that it? (Alien Blues, Vundabar)

You wanted it (All Time Low, Jon Bellion)

Whatever you feel (Back To Friends, Lauren Spencer Smith)

It cuts deep (I always kinda knew you’d be the death of me, Artemas)

Don’t worry about me (Son of a bitch, Jessie Murph)

We spiral (Chemical Love, Magic Whatever)

Borders: @cafekitsune | Star Divider | Series Divider

[trixter-god]

Self indulgent Arkham story where we get to find out what exactly happened to Crane.

Like we saw him get nabbed by Croc and then assumed he died until in AC when you find out that Crane somehow survived the being a chew toy. Then in AK we find out this man decided instead of fixing his mauled face to some “normal” he reconfigures his face himself to look like his mask.

TO LOOK LIKE HIS MASK.

Along with the facts he now hobbles/walks slower, he wears a leg brace, the sickly green/white/yellow coloring to his skin.

I want this man’s hospital report, x-rays included, I want before and after full body pics. along with both his and Waylon’s statements and any (if any) eyewitness accounts of watching john probably clawing himself out of the sewers like a zombie. 

Johnathan Lauren Crane (not his real middle name) how you intrigue me so

[littlesunshine1223]

Hello

I would like to order Hamilton (Smut)

Something like John Laurens x fem.reader in a modern au and they are a couple and live together but their relationship is too complicated because John is too jealous and the reader is someone with a lot of friends and they have too many arguments.

In one of those discussions they stop talking and ignore each other, then the reader goes to a party with the Schuyler sisters and dresses up looking very sexy just to bother John.

The reader returns late at night and a little drunk and they start to discuss why he believes that she was unfaithful to him and she just to bother says that it is true (although it is a lie).She complains to him out of jealousy but he just doesn't want her to leave him for someone better.

I don't know how to explain, but do they reconcile?

Sorry, I'm embarrassed 🥹😅

Cruel Jealousy

John Laurens X FEM!Reader (modern au)

(TW: smut, swearing, jealous sex, slight mention of alcohol, etc)

“I can’t believe you! All you ever do is piss me off! Did you really think I wouldn’t notice the way you were hanging all over my friends?!” John yelled at you.

You rolled your eyes at him. It was another fight, the same argument over every little thing you did when he was around.

“Do Not roll your eyes at me Y/N! You’re half drunk and it’s nearly 2 in the morning. Also that dress you’re fucking wearing is way too revealing, some random guy could’ve coped a feel at any point!” John once again exclaimed upon your non-listening ears.

Your mind felt fuzzy from the couple glasses of wine you’d drank at the party as you chatted with the Schuyler sisters. John continued to rant about how what you’re wearing is revealing and how you were supposedly flirting with his friends. But he didn’t know what really happened, as you were walking over to get another drink you accidentally slipped over the bottom of your dress and Hamilton caught you before you hit the ground. In John’s eyes he saw you hanging all over Alexander, he didn’t know the full story and wasn’t letting you explain what actually happened.

You snapped back to reality when you heard him exclaim that he thinks you were cheating on him with his friends. “What made you think that I’d ever cheat on you?!” You asked him in disbelief. He looked at you with his eyes brimmed in tears, “You’ve ignored me for the past two days, you wear clothes that practically show off everything, and all you do is hang all over everyone you come close to like they’re a damn playground! So just tell me, tell me the truth…have you been seeing someone else?!”

You thought for a moment before answering. Your drunken thoughts only fueled the flames of the argument when you told him that you had slept with his three best friends.

He looked at you in disbelief for a moment but once he snapped out of his gaze he heard you complaining how none of his best friends didn’t take you back to their houses after the party. You saying this made something inside John’s mind snap as he was pushed over the edge. He walked towards you angrily, grabbing you roughly and pinning you to the wall. His lips found yours hungrily. The kiss slowly became a makeout session until he pulled away. “You’re lying right through your fucking teeth.” He purred into your ear seductively.

His hands slipped from your hips to your thighs, one hand slipping between your legs. His fingers and palm rubbed you through your pants which made you moan for him from the friction. “You like that baby? You like pissing me off just so I’m rough with you? Bet you want me to fuck you like a whore. If you wanted me to touch you so bad then get on your knees and suck me off. Clearly you wanted a dick down your throat since you were flirting up my friends.” He smirked as you slipped down to your knees. You unzipped his pants and tugged them down along with his boxers to reveal his nod fully hard erection.

You licked some pre that was oozing from his shaft which made him let out a shaky breath. “Stop teasing me and just suck it properly.” He warns in an irritated tone but seconds later you take him into your mouth properly and suck as hard as you can, causing him to let out a gasp which faded into a moan. The more you bobbed your head and ran your tongue over his sensitive skin the more he tugged at your hair and thrusted his hips into your mouth.

“Damn baby, feel so fucking good.” He whined as his hips kept bucking into your mouth. His sounds of pleasure kept getting more desperate and slightly higher in tone as you continued to suck him off. After a few moments passed he came down your throat with a broken moan. “Baby, go back to the bedroom and strip. I’ll be in there in a minute.” He whispered into your ear seductively. You do as he says and walk back to your shared bet room. You strip your clothes off and lay spread out on the bed, legs open and hands behind your head.

John walks in after a few moments and immediately positions himself between your legs. He tossed his clothes off and grabbed the lube from the nightstand before lubing up his still erect cock and pushing it deep inside you. Both of you let out sounds of pleasure but you had to admit that the stretch from his girth stung a little bit. He noticed your whimpers nearly immediately and kisses you deeply. “It’s alright y/n, I’ll wait till you’re ready for me to move.” He continues to kiss all over your face until you tell him you’re ready. The seconds you tell him that he starts thrusting slow and deep, not wanting to overdo it too soon.

A couple moments pass and his thrusts get rougher and you swear you feel him in your stomach from how deep he is. Your moans and sounds of pleasure only fuel his thrusts and make him throw his head back with a groan of your name as he pounds you oh so harder. “Hell, maybe if I get you pregnant then you’ll stop whoring around with my friends. You’ll look good all stuffed and swollen because of me.” He rambled as his mind got fuzzier and fuzzier from how hard you’re squeezing his aching hardness inside you.

The pleasure was becoming too much as you got closer and closer to your climax. You felt his hands grabbing at your own, after getting a hold on your hands he holds them and ruts into you deeper and harder. “C-Close!~ Jo-John!~” you moan before hitting your peak and cumming around his cock when it was balls deep inside you. John throws his head back with a moan before he pulls out with a wet pop noise and cums on your chest with a whimper as his eyes rolled back for a second or two.

He lays on the bed next to you, both of you panting. “Did you mean what you said?” You turn your head to face him. “Did I mean what?” “Did you mean what you said about getting me pregnant just to make sure everyone knows I’m yours?” Johns face went red at the question but after he over came his embarrassment he kissed you and nodded. “I hate when other people look at you like they’re just waiting to pounce. I just…I don’t want you getting hurt. I love you too much to just stand around while you tease some other random person.�� He explains to you. You couldn’t help but kiss him deeply on the lips while snuggling closer. “Here babe, I’ll go get a rag to clean us up then-” he offered but you cut him off. “Who said we were done?” A smirk formed on his face before he kissed you deeper than ever and pinned you down to the bed.

It was going to be a long night…

[froggywritesstuff]

lafayette, thomas jefferson, alexander hamilton, and john laurens with an s/o who stutters

Pairings: Lafayette, Thomas Jefferson, Alexander Hamilton, and John Laurens (seperately) x g/n!reader with a stutter

Warnings: mentions of anxiety, mentions of ableism (i think?)

Time: not specified but probably modern

request: anonymous: heyyyy can I request Hamilton headcanons (separately) for Lafayette, Thomas Jefferson, Alexander Hamilton, and John Laurens with a s/o who stutters? 

A/N: idk why this took so long considering they're so short but i hope you like it. also idk if some of this stuff applies to everyone who stutters, but i mainly based some of this around how my stutter is so apologies if you can't relate to some of this stuff

Lafayette

with english being his second language, he isn't always the best at speaking it, so he's super patient and understanding with you. he legitimately doesn't care if he has to listen to you repeat and restart the same sentence ten times until you can finally say that one word you're stuck on.

Thomas Jefferson

to be honest, he's kind of an asshole when he first hears you stuttering. it has nothing to do with you, he's just not very educated about it. but he does do his research and apologises like, a hundred times for making fun of it. from that moment on he doesn't really bring any attention to your stutter whenever he hears it, not wanting to ever make you feel bad about it again if he brought it up. but he will throw hands if he sees someone making fun of your stutter.

Alexander Hamilton

I kid you not, this man will be cursing anyone out if he even thinks they’re judging you for your stutter. he's super patient when it comes to you, and never rushes you when you stutter. if someone else tries to rush you when you're stuttering he just gives them a cold death glare to shut them up, and when you're out of ear shot he'll just verbally murder them.

John Laurens

he's just like. super sweet and understanding about it. if you're ever in public and he can see you're anxious about talking, he knows instantly how to calm you down and ease your nerves. 

buy me a coffee <3

[gaysindistress]

Cocaine Jesus - Part 3 of Fine Line

Pairing: Mafia!Steve Rogers x reader

Warnings: you know the drill; angst, mentions of abuse, vague descriptions of abuse, the feels, Peggy Carter andddd John Walker slander

Word count

Master list

Fine Line & Dial Drunk

Word count: 4.3k

Tag list: @vickie5446 @cakesandtom @zaraomarrogers @deafeningvoidcloud

a/n: you guys - "I need you to promise me that you'll give Honey and Steve a happy ending.

me -"I promiseeeeed other people that I'd write all the angst possible and I gave 'em my word sooooooo"

disclaimer: credits to original creator/poster of image/gif. found on Google/Pinterest

The letter read the most ridiculous thing that she has ever seen. A poor excuse, a failed lie, a fucked up story, a concoction of rumors mashed together to make something out of nothing. He left it on her bed without a second word to her, a word to her parents, and walked straight out of her life. He left the letter detailing every single lie he could’ve thought of for the last 48 hours on her bed, on her pillow to be specific like some fucked up love story you read about in high school. She always joked that they might be Romeo and Juliet but this? 

This? 

His actions were far beyond anything that Shakespeare might’ve thought of. 

“I used you to cheat on Peggy but we’re getting married so this has to end. Goodbye, Steve.” 

One single sentence to end a relationship that they had talked about that could last for years. One single sentence that shattered everything that she thought to be true and concrete in her life. 

One sentence to take everything she’s been looking forward to drowned in it in her own tears. 

She threw the letter into the fire, with tears streaming down her face, and a vengeance as she stared at the flames. Ashes of the relationship flooded around her, but a shard of light called her attention. On her nightstand is the picture of them from that first night; a polaroid of two bright and smiling faces, so hopeful that life will be OK. You already know the story behind the picture, but in the wake of the letter, she contemplated destroying that picture and any memory of Steve she could find. A part of her wouldn’t let her burn it so instead she slipped it into her nightstand and crawled into a ball on the floor to cry. 

That night she slipped into adulthood and decided never again would she allow herself to be fooled by men like Steve Rogers. 

“Hey doll, where would you like me to start?” Bucky gently calls over to her as she stares around the room around her her entire life from birth to know I haven’t packed up into boxes and is laying like a field of memories around them. 

“I don’t know. I guess just pick up one and start putting them in the truck?”

But he gives her a no and does what she says; picking one box up and hauling it out to the truck. Her mom had helped her pack, shuffling through all the items that she felt like her dear daughter no longer needed. Her mother, Lauren, knew not to touch anything in the nightstand. She had seen the polaroid some nights after Steve’s week departure and figured that her daughter had hidden in the picture in the nightstand. She had liked Steve and talked to her husband many nights about how she had hoped that maybe one day he would be the one to harness that wild spirit within her daughter. Having known the Rogers since practically birth herself, it was a shock that Sarah had let something like this happen. Lauren had tried to get her husband to say something to Mr. Rogers however, nothing came of the conversations, but frustration and misplaced anger. She didn’t think that she nor her husband would ever be able to give the Rogers the time of day after this. It was a miracle to even get Bucky in the house given their new sentiment towards the Rogers.

Bucky chose to keep his words to himself and only offered her sad smiles or gentle hugs. He was so unbelievably pissed at Steve when he found out when it happened because they had known since his return that he would be forced to marry Peggy. On that Fourth of July night, he urged Steve to let go of this honey, to give her a chance but he refused. He was selfish like that sometimes, taking and taking from everyone around him, because it made him feel better. It caused many fights between the two childhood friends seeing as Bucky had taken a liking to her too. It was fun for him; the girls, the wine, and the weed. Nothing that Bucky could say would make him stop because he has always got what he wanted and Bucky was forever indentured to him so his hands were tied. His own father was in the same position as him, but to the older Mr. Rogers. So he watched on the sidelines as Steve ruined yet another young girl's life with his charm. 

When Bucky had walked back into the room, he sensed a shift in the air as she kneeled in front of her nightstand, frozen in time she held that stupid portrait in her hands and gawked at it as if she saw a ghost. Every ounce of life and color drained from her face as she held this momento of pain in her hand. It burned him to not just rip it from her hands and destroy it for her. He wanted to give her everything that she had been promised and so much more but he knew that if he did that he would risk the wrath of Steve. He knew that if he tried to give her any ounce of comfort, Steve would know and make his life a living hell. He already had enough control over Bucky’s life and he didn’t want to give him another reason to be even more controlling.

Instead of doing what his heart screamed at him to do he gently placed his hand on her shoulder so she would know that he was there for her if she needed. She brought it as if burned by his touch and quickly dropped off, turning slightly to look at him. He saw the tears in her eyes, and he gathered her into his arms for a death grip hug. One hand snuck into her hair, and held her head against his chest, as the other gripped her tightly, as if to provide her with all the physical comfort that she could ever need as her body shook from the sobs, a wet spot forms on his shirt and his own throat tightened at the feeling resolves quickly turned from that of a heart broken woman to those gut, wrenching gasps of a person experiencing true agony. The sound stopped leaving her mouth, and her body heaved in efforts to keep up with the demand for air. Her knees buckled and they dropped to the floor together in a heap of tears and bones.

“I got you, doll. I won’t let you go. I promise.” 

His words seemed to make her cries worse, but her arms wrapped around him and her hands Claude into the back of his shirt. She was gripping him as tight as he gripped her, the strength of their shared misery, keeping them together. 

“I got you. It’s okay. Let it out.” 

“After this, we can’t see each other.” 

Once again, the boxes of her life scattered around them as they ate Chinese food and settled into her small apartment. 480 square feet of nothing but everything that she could possibly think of. She drops the chopsticks, flinging rice and vegetables everywhere when she hears the words come out of his mouth.

“I don’t… what?”

I just don’t think that it’s a good idea for us to hang out because…”

“ I swear to god if you tell me that Steve had anything to do with this I will actually kill him.”

He gives a sad laugh and looks down at his feet, “ doll. I don’t know what to tell ya.”

“You can start by answering my question. Did Steve have anything to do with us?” 

He refuses to answer her question and won’t meet her eyeline. That’s all the answer she needs though. Steve had yet again ruined another chance for her to be happy and this time he wasn’t even there to do it. 

She slummed against the couch and almost dropped the food container on the floor with disbelief. She stares ahead and says nothing. She can’t say anything. Nothing she could possibly think of would make this moment feel any better than it does.

“I’m sorry,” Bucky mumbles as he drops a light kiss onto her forehead and walks out of her life. 

Once again, that Polaroid staring back at her as it peeks out of the top of the box it’s in. All she can see is the fireworks, but she knows what the picture is. She knows the curse that inevitably brings, but she can’t throw it away. 

She won’t. 

“You know, my apartment is bigger and you wouldn’t have to get rid of anything,” the blonde jokes as he lugs another donation bag out of her room. 

Y/N shakes her head while she sorts more of her things, deciding what can go to D.C. with her and what stays behind with the rest of her past. 

“But you’re here and I’m going to be 4 hours away. How is that supposed to work?” she calls after him. 

“I wasn’t talking about my old place.”

She cocks her head but continues to focus on the task at hand, “Yeah your old place would be like a 5 hour drive on a good day.”

“Look at me, gorgeous.”

When she turns to look at him, he’s leaning against the door frame with a set of keys in his hand and a smile wide across his face. She gives him an even more confused look. He shakes them before tossing them to her. Turning over the keys in her hand, she spots a key chain that reads “I heart D.C.”

“I don’t…” she pauses for a moment, “Oh my god you got the job?!”

“I sure did. I start in a week which means…” he trails off and his smile grows even bigger. She jumps up and hugs him so tightly that he stumbles back. 

“That’s so exciting, John! I’m so proud of you,” she all but exclaims holding him against her and the excitement vibrates off of her. 

“Thank you, gorgeous,” he whispers as he takes her chin in his hand and tilts so their lips meet, “But that’s not even the best part. I had your landlord put us on the same lease and get us a bigger place.”

She stills and pulls away, “You did what?”

“Don’t be like that. Be happy that we’re both moving up in our careers and we’re moving to a new city. You even said it yourself; if I moved with you, we’d move in together.”

Nervously chuckling, she nods her head, “Oh I just wasn’t expecting it so soon, I guess.”

“What? You have a secret boyfriend or something?” tension fills his voice at her hesitation. 

“No, no! It’s just a lot of info at once, that’s all,” she tries to reason and it seems to calm what storm was brewing. 

John lets out a deep laugh and kisses her once more before letting her go. 

“Good because I saw this,” he says, pulling out that god forsaken polaroid from his back pocket, “And got a little worried.”

Her smile freezes once more and she scrambles to come up with something, “Oh that’s an old family friend that’s all.”

“You look awful… close.”

“Just friends… well not even that anymore,” she tells John as she returns back to her cleaning, “You can just put it in a box.”

John hums but it’s filled with dismay as he debates ripping it to see her reaction. He’s not stupid, he could tell that whoever the man in the picture was, he meant something to Y/N and it was beyond just old friends. He takes a picture of it to send to a cop friend of his and slips it back into his pocket. He’s going to figure out who this man was and erase him from Y/N’s life. 

Five days later John gets his answer. 

Steve Grant Rogers, born July 4 19xx to Sarah and Joseph Rogers in Brooklyn, NY. Married to Margaret Carter Rogers. No known criminal record or alises. Father has a lengthy record and is suspected to be the current leader of the Rogers crime family. Steve is expected to be take over when Joseph dies. 

John’s jaw clenches when he reads the emails and closes his computer. Anger licks up his spine at the thought of his sweet Y/N being at all connected to this criminal let alone as close as she appeared to be. Almost immediately his anger is drowned out when she walks through the door of their new apartment, arms full of groceries. 

“Here, gorgeous, let me get that for you.”

Time flies by when you’re having fun or at least that’s what they tell everyone. Y/N hadn’t thought about that Polaroid since John brought it up. She assumed that he did as he was told, and just slipped into another box. She didn’t even question it when she hadn’t found it when they were unpacking. Time really did seem to heal her wounds and Steve had finally left her mind. Nearly 5 years after he’d left her heartbroken and angry, she finally was able to forget the hold he had on her. Even though she’d briefly tried to start something with Bucky, John Walker had been the one to show her what love meant… or at least what his version was. 

Her new friends in D.C. had warned her about the red flags they’d seen but Y/N dismissed them. She felt she knew him better after all they’d been together for three years and were engaged. She always brushed it off as them being unhappy in their own relationship or John just had a bad day or he wasn’t always like this. It had gotten to the point where her own mother Lauren started to point out the concerning things she saw; however, it wasn’t until her three year anniversary dinner that it all came to a head. 

John had suggested they go back to New York for a little getaway considering how stressful their jobs and wedding planning were. He’d made reservations at one of the finest restaurants on the Upper East Side along with staying in one of his friend’s condos. Everything had been perfect; champagne, rose petals, quiet instrumental music, and two people fighting in the bedroom. 

“I can’t believe you! You’re such a fucking asshole!” She shouted at him from the bedroom as he continued to get ready. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he calmly responded, fixing his tie. 

“You know exactly what I’m talking about, John.” 

“No I don’t.”

“You had Joaquin look into Steve.”

“I did so what,” he leveled a very stern gaze towards her through the bathroom mirror. 

“And you didn’t tell me for 2 years.”

“So what?” He said even lower than before but finally turned to look at Y/N, “why does it matter if I looked into your little boyfriend?”

“What are you talking about?” She huffed, back straightening as chills began to run down her spine. 

“I know about you and Steve. You didn’t want me to know so YOU lied to me about it so what was I supposed to do? Ignore it? I wouldn’t be a very good fiancé, husband even if I ignored my gut when it comes to you.”

“You’re seriously trying to say that you were concerned about me? I would’ve told you anything you wanted to know, you didn’t have to have someone get a whole ass police background check,” she tried to reason and to defuse the situation. She could sense the anger and aggression boiling under John’s skin no matter how calm and collected he seemed in the moment. 

He ignored her, instead fixing the cuffs of his jacket and shirt. Waiting and making her think he was ignoring her was his favorite tactic to get under her skin. 

“I didn’t lie to you, I would never do that,” she tried again whilst taking small steps towards him. 

“I care so much about you, gorgeous,” he started, closing the gap before engulfing her in a bone crushing hug, “Steve is a dangerous man, so much more dangerous than you could ever imagine.” 

She gasped at the pressure he was putting on her, “John you’re hurting me.” 

His grip loosened for a moment before he spun her around so she could look in the mirror. One of his hands looped around her shoulders and the other found its place around her neck. Her own hands flew to his wrist and she began to claw at his wrist as he dropped his head so he could speak directly into her ear. 

“I am the only person who can protect you from him. Me,” he punctuated the words with a tightening grip, “I’m disappointed that you didn’t tell me about him, gorgeous. I can’t have a lying wife and you know that; I need someone who is completely loyal to me. Do you think you can do that?” 

Tears fell down her face, ruining the makeup she’s just finished putting on as she rapidly nodded her head. Satisfied he dropped her and let her fall forward to catch herself on the bathroom door frame. 

“Clean up, we’re leaving in 15 minutes,” he whispered into her ear before leaving the room. Once she knew she was alone, she scrambled to grab her phone and dialed a number she’d hoped to never dial again. 

“Doll?” The voice answered with confusion. 

She cried even harder when Bucky picked up and she choked on her words, “I need your help please. I’ll pay you anything, everything. Please just… please.”

“Doll what is it? Where are you?”

“I’ll send you the address but you have to come quickly. Hide in the alley and I’ll figure out how to get there.”

“Of course, do you want me to call HIM?”

“No,” she barely held back the next wave of sobs at the thought and hung up. 

She took a few deep breaths, calming her nervous system before standing to fix her makeup. Within minutes, she’s managed to make herself look presentable to John’s standards. However she’d exchanged her heels for flats in hopes that if she did have to make a run for it, she wouldn’t break her ankle. 

Her phone pinged beside her, alerting her that Bucky would be at the restaurant when they got there and was in the back alley like she’d asked. 

“I’ll be right back. Can you order me the salmon if I’m back when they take our order?” she sweetly smiled at John as she got up. 

He gave her that sick PR smile he used on his sponsors and went back to reading the menu. 

Y/N’s body shook as she got closer and closer to the bathroom. On her way she stopped their waitress, a younger red headed woman that John had been relentlessly rude to. The woman smiled and stopped her by gently grabbing her arm to pull her closer. 

“Go through the kitchen and out the back door. He’s waiting for you,” she whispered to Y/N. Fear ran through her body again as she stared wildly at her. 

“Go. Bucky hates waiting around,” she smirked before releasing her arm and guiding her into the kitchen. The red head waved a hand at Y/N as if to shoo away a child and pointed to a set of doors that she assumed led outside. 

She mouthed thank you and ran for the doors, pushing them open with all her might. Before her was a blacked out SUV and a smiling Bucky in the backseat. He had opened the door when she came bursting out. 

“Get in Doll.”

She didn’t need to be told twice. She climbed in and sunk into the leather as the car pulled away. 

“Where to?” He asked after they’d gotten away from the restaurant. 

“Somewhere safe.”

Bucky nodded as he tapped the driver on the shoulder and said something to him. She didn’t register what address he gave him because fatigue took over her body and she drifted off into the abyss of sleep. 

10 years. 

10 years since she’d been home, seen family, spoken to her friends. 

10 years since she’d left John in that restaurant and gotten into the car with Bucky. 

It had been 10 years since she’d gained her freedom but at the cost of a normal life. 

During that time, Bucky and Natasha, the waitress from that night, had hidden her and kept her in some sort of witness protection program. Bucky knew of John’s reputation and knew that the only way to guarantee Y/N’a safety was for her to disappear. He’s made her a ghost, changing everything about her so that no one could find her aside from him and Natasha. Of course going into hiding meant she had literally no other connections but the two of them. 

Nat had offered her a job working alongside her as an executive assistant to Bucky and another man named Sam Wilson. Bucky had assured her that he didn’t work for Steve anymore and she wouldn’t see him. His promise did little to quell her fears but she trusted him nonetheless. 

It became clear pretty quickly after she went into hiding that John had no idea where she went but he kept looking. Her family had been told about the situation but everyone else was kept in the dark, which made John even more furious. His efforts to find her had been in vain and roughly around the 4th year of no results he stopped looking. Regardless she remained hidden because at this point, she’d lived most of her adult life this way. Y/N didn't really know anything outside of the world that she’s created but that’s not to say she was naive. Of course working as the assistant to a mob boss, she wasn’t oblivious to the real world. In fact she probably understood it better than most, she simply preferred her world. 

It had been nearly 15 years by now since she’d seen Steve. Occasionally she’d see his name on paperwork from Bucky’s time working under him. Other than that, there had been nothing. Peggy, on the other hand, she’d seen far too often between events, galas, and even in Bucky’s office. Y/N doubted that the woman remembered her, let alone knew who she was so she didn’t let it phase her when she saw her. Natasha was quick to fill her in on all of the gossip if she wanted but it was usually the same; Peggy cheated with the same two men, Steve found out and would threaten divorce but it never came to fruition because she would claim she was pregnant. Spoiler alert she never was but if she made a big enough deal about it, Steve would have to reconcile with her to save his and his family’s reputation. 

However this round of accusations and threats seemed to stick; Steve had actually filed for divorce and demanded a paternity test if she was, in fact, pregnant. Of course she wasn't, hence why they were fighting in the lobby of Bucky’s office. Natasha chuckles under her breath at their petty words and glances over to Y/N. 

“You ready?” She asks as she gathers her own things. 

“Can we even get out? It sounds like they’re literally at the door.” 

Before Natasha can answer, Bucky walks in followed by the arguing couple. They’re shouting so many things at each other that no one can keep track of what they’re actually arguing about. 

“Oh fucking believe me. I can’t wait for this divorce to be over. Maybe I’ll stop getting so many fucking STDs,” Steve shouts as he slammed the door behind himself. 

Peggy scoffs as she crosses her arms over her chest and shakes her head. 

“Yeah that’s right. Don’t say anything because you know I’m right,” he scoffs back, dropping himself onto the couch Nat and Bucky had christened several times. 

Y/N winces at his loud voice and turns around so that her back is to them. She grabs whatever paperwork she can and shoves it into her bag. 

Nat clears her throat and whispers, “Let’s go.” 

She loops her arm in Y/N’s and bids everyone a goodbye. Dropping a kiss on Bucky’s cheek, she tries her hardest to sneak the other woman out before Steve can see her. As soon as they’re out the door, they hear exactly what they’re afraid of. 

“I swear to god, Buck, if that was Y/N, I will execute you right here, right now.”

Nat stiffens for a moment but quickens her pace and practically drags Y/N along with her to get them out as soon as possible. Steve’s booming voice chases after them and they make eye contact as the two women climb into the elevator. Before the doors close, Y/N can see the absolute heartbreak and pain that’s written across his face. 

She doesn’t care though. 

He’d done the exact same to her. 

She’d gotten a few weeks of privacy before the oaf of a man came knocking at her door. The day had been rainy like the week prior and she kept to herself inside. Y/N had always loved the rain no matter where she was at because it reminded her that the earth could renew itself after a storm. However her peace is shattered when she hears the familiar sound of a luxury car pulling up in front of her house. Grabbing the gun Bucky stashed for her, she goes to peek out of the window to see her worst nightmare walking up. 

Albeit it’s Steve and not John, she still tucked the gun back into its place before answering the door. 

One knock. 

Two knocks. 

Three knocks. 

She opens it and her breath hitches in her chest at the sight. 

“What are you doing here?” 

The first words that came to her mind after 15 years of nothing at all. 

[umi-teardrop]

(Based on the conservation I had with Zayn aka @ask-chubby-hamilton while asking them about the lore)

@ask-chubby-hamilton :

-1, 2, 3, 4! Counting every day, I been stuck in here… can someone help me get away? 5, 6, 7, 8! Time is just a hoax in a musically world of characters and historical jokes

Zayn - Creator/Anons:

-You must think that your dreaming

@ask-chubby-hamilton :

-Just tell me what your scheming

Evil Anon:

-You look like you’ve seen a ghost

Anons:

-But your lucky to have such amazing anons like us

@ask-chubby-hamilton :

-I’m scared to lose myself here

Anons/Creator-Zayn:

-But there is nothing to fear

@ask-chubby-hamilton :

-I can’t take it anymore! Is that an exit door?

Everyone( @ouioui-lafayettes-askblog , @ask-thomas-jefferson-1 , @ask-james-madison-stuff , @ask-general-washington , @ask-john-laruens , @askh3rculesmu11igan , @ask-aaron-burr1 , @ask-theodosia-blog , @mreynolds-ask-blog , @jreynolds-ask-blog-1 , @ask-susan-reynolds , @e-schuyler-ask-blog , @angelicashuylersaskblog , @peggy-schuylers-ask-blog , @samuel-seaburys-askblog , @that-876girl474 , @martha-manning-laurens-ask-blog , @ask-deborah-sampson ):

-Just your imagination! The exit Is your fixation door after door you find that it is just a chaotic hallucination! You try to find a way out… But your stuck here day after day inside a chaotic hallucinations

*music*

@ask-chubby-hamilton :

-A, L, E, X! I don’t know my past tell me if I’m real or I’m just a fake E, N, D, E, R!

The writing on the wall! The vowels and the consonants say save us all

@ask-thomas-jefferson-1 :

-You must think that you’re dreaming!

@e-schuyler-ask-blog :

-it’ll be okay believe me!

@askh3rculesmu11igan :

-You look like you’ve seen a ghost

@ask-thomas-jefferson-1 :

Your lucky to have what’s left of your sanity

@ask-james-madison-stuff :

-and some might call it tragic…

@ask-aaron-burr1 :

-when the fandom lost its magic…

@ask-chubby-hamilton :

-I can't take it anymore

Is that an exit door?

Everyone:

-

Just your imagination

The exit is your fixation

Door after door, you'll find that it's just a chaotic hallucination

You try to find a way out

But you're stuck here day after day

Inside a chaotic hallucination

(Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh)

(Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh)

@ask-chubby-hamilton :

-Is it an amalgamation of my own fixation?

Door after door, I find that it is just a chaotic hallucination

I’m done trying for a way out

I'm stuck here day after day

Inside this choatic hallucination

Everyone:

-Just your imagination

The exit is your fixation

Door after door, you'll find that it is just a chaotic hallucination

You try to find a way out

But you're stuck here day after day

Inside a chaotic hallucination

Chaotic hallucination (oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh)

-End

[original song by OR3O from YouTube]