#john b angst

[cute-sucker]

note: im begging for requests for this au!!! i'm sobbing, idk what character it is <3

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jonbee taking care of you during an apocalypse and you're in near tears begging him to kiss you. it happens all the time, the casual way that he's dominant over you. if it's the way that he's so much taller, the way his rough hands feel on yours. he always drops a kiss on your forehead before serving you french toast.

you love the normality of it all. the way he's humming the song on the radio, and you're bobbing your head to it. ivy is growing in the trailer park, and the shorts you have on have dirt smudges all over it when the two of you were running.

yet john b is giving you everything he can to serve you a normal lifestyle. he's trying everything to make you feel better, tucking back your hair, and coaxing you to eat. he's even found an old apron that has, 'kiss the chef,' on it, and suddenly your tearing up, holding up your brittle knife and fork.

hot tears drip down your face, as you sniffle quietly nudging at the food on your plate. almost immediately john b turns around, eyes full of concern.

"hey? hey, what's wrong?" he murmers, dropping down to your level. his hat is on backwards, and you fight the urge to turn it the other way. "don't cry pup," he cooes, grazing your wet cheeks, and you fight the urge of jumping into his arms, or asking to sit on his lap. after all, the two of you are platonic anyways. that's clear to tell.

you choke on your sob, "iono, just feel this pressure on my chest. i really need to be close to someone." even as you say this, your eyes are wide ready to be rejected, but john be is always there for you, as his hands snake up your sides, and sits you down on his lap.

"alright now. let's eat something now. maybe that'll make the ache go away."

you nodd at his soft words. he's right, he's always right. the two of you could barley find normal food now, always preservatives, or food that makes you hurt. you like it when he embraces you like this, his big arms around your waist, as you feel like a kid swinging your legs. and yet here you are crying the one day that there is good food.

suddenly you feel worse. the world is ending, and you'll be dead soon, and john be will never be with you, and you will have never kissed anyone. you'll never be a librarian in a niche town with a husband who would kiss you off your feet. no, you will have never kissed someone! what a tragedy to love someone so deeply yet never touch their soothing lips. maybe john b's lips on yours would fix everything.

you feel so stupid.

finally, john b puts the fork down, warm breath on your neck, and he sets you off his lap to look you in the eye.

"i need you to tell me what's wrong, and so i can fix it." he whispers to you, his hand rubbing soothing circles on your back. you shake your head, feeling the pounding feeling in your chest, as if you were going to vomit but your stomach was empty.

john b sighs, his voice firm now, "this won't go away. show me where it hurts. do you feel sick?" he murmurs to you, giving you his hand to guide, and you tentivally take it to place it on your heart.

"here," you croak, "it hurts here."

he looks surprised, yet his eyes are warm as he speaks in his soothing tone, his words practically melting in your mouth, "why does it hurt pup?"

"i need you to kiss me," you blurt out, and let go of his hand, "so it can stop."

he tilts his head almost amused, "yea? you need me to kiss you, so your heart can stop hurting."

you hate the way he's teasing you, a soft lint in his tone, his large hands still settling on you as he talks to you. he's so gentle with you it burns your skin, it burns everything inside of you.

"i can't take it. i can't take the fact that i've never kissed someone," and then you pause, your voice a whimper, "i can't take it that i haven't kissed you jonbee-"

and then without a doubt, he looks at you again, his eyes so feverious, so full of emotion, burning with the exact same fire that you feel your body ablaze with.

just like that john b cups your jaw, and kisses you so sweetly you see stars.

[cameronsprincess]

— warnings: smut! 18+ mean!john b, bimbo!reader, degrading, oral (m receiving), slight choking, fingering, hair pulling.

likes, reblogs and comments are appreciated <3

❥ john b snaps at bimbo!gf!reader

“he’s my best friend, y/n! and you don’t expect me to get upset that you were flirting with him?”

you sink down into the couch further, fighting the tears that pricked at your eyes. you’d never seen john b. so upset before. you didn’t mean to make him so mad. you only flirted with jj because you’d saw him talking to sarah cameron. his ex girlfriend. it set you off, so naturally, you wanted to hit him where it hurt. flirting with jj.

“i-i didn’t mean to make you so mad, baby.. it-it was innocent. i-i was just upset that you were talking to sarah, i’m- i’m sorry” you choked out, finally letting your hot tears fall down your face.

“maybe don’t be such a slut! have you ever thought of that? hmm? sarah means nothing to me!”

you stand from your spot on the couch, taking a step toward john b and smacking his chest. “and jj means nothing to me!”

you turn quickly on your heels and storm off to the bedroom, slamming the door behind you and throwing yourself onto the bed, burying your face in the pillows as you screamed out in frustration.

the sound of the bedroom door pushing open makes you lift your head, turning slowly to see john b standing in the doorway, slight regret filling his eyes.

“i’m sorry baby. i didn’t mean to upset you. i just- i’m so used to everyone choosing jj, that seeing you flirt with him set me off”

you sit yourself up in the bed, crossing your legs as you look into his beautiful brown eyes.

“i wouldn’t ever choose jj. i want you. only you.”

john b sighs, running a hand through his messy brown hair. he takes two long strides towards you, pushing your back into the mattress as he crawls on top of you, his arms caging you into the bed.

he leans down, his lips softly ghosting over the shell of your ear, the feel of his breath on your skin as he whispers sending a shiver through your body. “i know that. let me make it up to you”

you suck in a shaky breath, wrapping your arms around his neck, smashing your lips with his in seconds.

he kisses you back, his lips consuming yours like he was a man that was touch starved. he slips his tongue into your mouth, dominating yours instantly, pulling a string of whines and moans from you.

“you’re so pretty when you’re like this. all whiny and hot, and i haven’t even touched you yet” he rasps, placing one hand around your throat and squeezing at it softly.

you bring your bottom lip between your teeth, eyes stuck on his darkened over, lust filled ones. you loved and hated when john b was mad, you loved it because he always made up for it in the dirtiest ways possible, but you hated it because, honestly, john b was sort of scary when he was angry.

“gonna make you remember who you belong to, you want that? want me to show you that you’re mine?”

you nod your head slowly, the grip he had on your throat tightening as you moved your head.

“words. you know i don’t like silent responses baby girl”

“y-yes. want you”

he releases the grip he has on your throat, pulling his shirt over his head and tossing it onto the floor, leaving his tanned, muscular body on display for you.

you sit yourself up, reaching for the zipper on his shorts and pulling it down with haste. you help him slide his shorts down his legs, leaving him in nothing but his tight boxers, his already hardened cock pressing tightly against the fabric.

you reach your hand out, palming him through his boxers, making him growl from the contact.

“my girls a needy little thing isn’t she? good thing i’m in a giving mood tonight” john b says, his tone slightly mocking at your need for him.

“s-so needy. please, let me suck your cock” you beg, fingers playing with the waistband of his boxers, lightly tugging at them.

“don’t worry baby, you will”

john b pushes his boxers down his legs, lifting himself off the bed to remove them completely and tossing them onto the bedroom floor. you swipe your tongue across your bottom lip, mouth salivating at the sight of his thick, veiny cock in front of you.

you eagerly reach your hands out, gripping at him lightly, stroking your hand softly up and down his length, pulling a low groan from his lips.

his fingers grip the back of your head, pulling at your hair as he pushes your face down. “suck. now” he demands.

you smirk up at him, licking a hot stripe up the bottom of his shaft and placing a sweet kiss to his swollen head. he bucks his hips forward, fingers tightly gripping at your hair.

you push the head of his cock into your mouth, swirling your tongue around it, the taste of the precum that’s leaked from the tip making you hum in appreciation.

“s-stop—fuck— stop fuckin’ teasing. you know i don’t like games, baby”

you place both hands on his thighs, steadying yourself before pushing him fully into your mouth, gagging slightly when the head hits the back of your throat. you begin slowly bobbing your head up and down his length, drool running down the sides of your mouth as you work his length.

john b groans, using the grip he has on your head to push himself farther into your mouth, thrusting his hips forward to fuck himself into your throat.

“s-so fuckin’ good. such a sweet dumb cock whore, takin’ me so good”

john b’s words have you squeezing your thighs together, your arousal beginning to pool between your legs. you lower one of your hands, fingers finding your clit and rubbing slow circles around it, trying to relieve some of the pressure you felt.

john b pushes you of him, your back hitting the mattress with a soft thud.

you gasp when you feel john b’s large hands on your inner thighs, prying them open quickly and running his thick fingers through your slick folds.

“john b. please” you breathe out, bucking your hips forward.

your mind was hazy, craving the feel of him stretching you, pushing you to see stars.

he continues the teasing motions with his fingers, coating his fingers with your arousal.

you open your mouth to speak but the words die on your tongue when he shoves two fingers inside you, curling them slightly and hitting your g-spot repeatedly.

“shiiit, john b, need more” you whine, fingers fisting into the bed sheets, toes curling from the pleasure building inside you.

he harshly thrusts his fingers in and out of your soaked cunt, his free hand gripping at your throat lightly. “so fuckin’ needy, so whiny. just let me take care of you, okay?”

you squeeze your eyes shut, nodding your head. john b picks up the pace of his fingers, pushing them in and out of you harshly, the band in your belly tightening as your first release of the night threatened to wash over you.

“s’close john b, p-please”

“cum for me. let it all out baby girl”

a few more harsh thrusts from his fingers and your release was washing over you in toe curling euphoria.

“fu-fuck”

john b helps you ride out your high, pushing his fingers in and out of you slowly as you came down. you go limp below him as he slowly pulls his fingers from you, making you wince at the empty feeling.

“you did so good baby. so so good for me”

you lift up on your elbows, chest heaving up and down as you try and steady your breathing back to a normal rhythm.

“i love you, jb. only you”

he leans down and presses a soft kiss to your lips, giving you a small smile as he pulls you down to lay beside him, wrapping his arms tightly around your waist.

“i know. and i love you. just, no more flirting with jj, got it?”

john b masterlist | taglist form

[sugarcoatedstarkey]

On my boat? p2

Pairings- John B Routledge x fem!reader

Summary- John B comes crawling back.

Warnings- Smut. A lil bit of fluff and angst, but mostly sexual intercourse, hair pulling, scratching, Oral, language. (18+)

A/n- part one incase you missed it

You had kept yourself busy since sleeping with John B, staying away from Tanny hill in case you ran into Sarah. Though you doubted she would do anything, the fight wouldn’t end very well for her.

Your phone had been on silent for the past 15 days, the day after the boat, John B had tried calling you multiple times. But you didn’t want to get involved in the drama, you slept with him to help him get back at Sarah. You hadn’t slept with him hoping he’d want you back.

But apparently that’s exactly what John B wanted, he wanted you. He didn’t want Sarah, he told her it was over.

So when he turned up at your door one night, you were shocked. Your facial expressions portraying exactly that, he gave you his famous grin. “Hey” you stated, guarding yourself behind the door.

“Hey, I’ve been trying to reach you”

“I’ve been busy”

“Well can we talk? About the other night?” He questions, his palm pushes on the door slightly. It nudges against your shoulder but you stay put, not letting him into your house.

“No John B, I don’t think we need to” you state, you start to close the door. His scuffed sneaker blocking it from closing, his eyes beg you to listen to what he has to say.

“Seriously, it’s not going to happen. We broke up John B, you can’t come crawling back because Sarah hooked up with Topper… you got even. It’s done”

He sees the betrayal behind your eyes, he knows he shouldn’t be doing this to you. He had broken your heart once before by moving onto Sarah so soon after the break up, it wasn’t right for him to be trying to get you back.

So he let you close the door this time, you watched him through the peephole hole. He stayed rooted in his spot for a few more minutes before he finally walked away, you hadn’t expected it to be so easy.

A small part of you feeling crushed he didn’t fight harder to get inside, fight harder to tell you why he was coming around.

But you turned around and kept pushing his face to the back of your mind, kept going on with life and pretending you didn’t want him back in your life.

You hadn’t expected any of the pogues to be at the house party of your friend James, you knew they didn’t really have time for drinking and normal lives now that they were involved with the gold.

So when you see John B standing in the corner of the room, talking to Pope and eyes searching the sea of bodies. You couldn’t stop yourself from ducking, zigzagging your way through open gaps until you were outside.

“Great” you mumbled, eyes falling on Sarah Cameron and Topper. Of course, the two of them however ignored you. That was until you felt a hand on your shoulder and suddenly Sarah was staring at you. “Hey”.

You turn your body slightly, John B stares down at you with his boyish grin. His sun kissed skin glowing under the moonlight, you offer him a small smile and let him give you a hug. “Hey John B”.

“Want to get a drink?” He questions, nodding his head over to the messy table in the corner. Far enough away that Sarah couldn’t watch on, you nod your head before you can talk yourself out of leaving the party and follow beside him. “How are you?” You question, small talk was never your forte.

“Sarah and I broke up”

“Oh… I’m sorry”

That’s why he was coming around and wanting to talk to you.

He shrugs, taking a sip from the red solo cup in his hand. You reach across the table and grab the bottle of tequila, the exact same brand you two had been drinking a few weeks ago. “Shots?”

He repeats his actions from last time, grabbing the bottle and taking a swig. You copy but keep your eyes trained on him from the side, his Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows harshly.

A small trickle of tequila escapes from your mouth, running down your lip, falling from your chin and landing on your chest.

“Can we go somewhere private” he questions, the tequila is doing the thinking and you're pulling him away from the party. Throwing all warnings out the window, you can feel his friend's eyes on the two of you.

Sarah’s eyes bored holes in your fingers that looped John B’s belt, you pretended not to notice them. Giving him a nudge into the secluded pool house, you don’t bother turning the light on. The fairy lights from outside give you both enough light to see.

“I didn’t fuck you because I wanted to get back together… I fucked you because you deserved to get even” you state, your bodies are close. He’s looking down at you and you can just make out the chocolate brown of his eyes. “So, you wouldn’t be into the idea of getting back together?” He questions, dropping his head a little lower.

Your mouths linger against one another, his hand cups your right cheek. Thumb caressing your chin, pulling slightly to open your mouth for him. “What?” You whisper, chest rising and falling heavier.

“I miss you”

“You miss the idea of me”

“No, I miss you Y/N… I need you, I physically ache without you, my brain won’t stop thinking about you… I can taste your lips, I can feel the warmth of your body”

“Stop John B”

“I can’t… I physically can not Y/N, I’m so sorry for the way things ended. I’m so sorry for bringing you into this mess, I fucked up and I will spend the rest of my life making up for it”

You push up on the balls of your feet and gently press your lips to his, you can feel the thudding of both your heart beats in your ears. You surrender yourself under his touch, his fingers dance up the length of your arm until he’s cupping your face with both hands.

The kiss becomes heated, both your breathing is heavy. Your mouth parted letting his tongue slip inside, his lips are warm and soft against your own. You could feel the soft tickle of his breath on your upper lip.

You wrapped your arms around his neck, pressing your chest against his. His hands moving from your cheeks to your waist, he begins walking you backwards.

The back of your knees meet the small bed, pushing you until you lay down completely. His body hovering over your own, you part your legs enough to let him kneel between. “Do you think… you should be rushing back into this?” You stutter, his mouth sucking at your neck has your thoughts all over the place.

You had told yourself you didn’t need him, that you needed to move on from the idea of having John B in your life again. But, here you were. Spread, wet and desperate for him. You couldn’t keep lying to yourself, you wanted him. Not just in a sexual way, you wanted his mind, body and soul.

The feeling of his warm hand on your thigh has you snapping out of your thoughts, you nudge John B on the chest. He pulls away from you, soft chocolate eyes meet yours. “Answer me”

“Sarah and I have been over for a long time… things got too much when we were stranded on that island, we just didn’t know how to end it” John B states, his eyes flickering to the door of the pool room. “Her kissing Topper just helped make it easier to call it quits”.

You nod your head, understanding sometimes you just need something to solidify why you needed to break up. “I totally get that… but do you think us sleeping together is what you need?”.

“I need you Y/N, I needed you the moment I laid eyes on you the other night… I needed you when you left, the past 15 days, I needed you when I turned up to your house, when I saw you duck and run from me.”

Your cheeks flush bright red, embarrassed that he had noticed you hiding from him. Your heart thumping, the sound travelling to your ear drums, you push on his chest and guide him down onto the bed. Straddling his waist, pressing your palms to his abs.

“John B, if we do this… You need to be certain your done with Sarah”

“I am... I promise pretty girl”

You kiss his lips, silencing the both of you. Your body ached for him, grinding your hips against his. He deepens the kiss, running his tongue on your lower lip.

“I could kiss you forever” he mumbles, placing open mouth kisses down your throat. Warning signs went off behind your eyes, telling you this would end badly. But you squeezed them shut to rid the thoughts, you’d deal with the repercussions later.

“Show me how much you need me” You murmur, eyes pleading with his. He gives you a grin and scoops your chin between his palm, enveloping your lips with his.

Pulling you down so you lay on him, holding your waist with his other hand. The hand that held your chin moved to tuck the strands of hair behind your ear only to move them down your neck to hold you in place.

“Need you here” he mumbles against your lips, kissing his way down your neck to your collarbone. “Here”.

His fingers fiddle with the buttons of your dress, exposing your triangle bathing suit. Cleavage exposed, his lips travel down until he’s sucking dark marks on your cleavage. “Here”.

You're mesmerised by his touch, your body tingling with excitement. You watch quietly as he moves the flimsy material of your bathing suit and exposes your breasts. Your nipples hardening from the cool air, his mouth takes them in. Sucking on them until you were grinding your core into his bulge.

“Here”.

“John B, I need you to touch me” you beg, your arousal drenched your panties. Soaking his shorts as you moved your hips against his. “Please”.

“I thought I was showing you how much I needed you” he chuckles, his fingers massaging the swell of your breast. You back arching into his touch. “Show me how much you need me by giving me an orgasm”.

He nods his head, placing his hand on your upper back and one around your bum. Swapping you both around until you sat at the end of the bed, he shoots you a quick look as though to ask for permission.

You grip the waistband of your panties and pull them down your leg, your arousal dripping onto your thighs. “Needy” he whispers, pushing you down onto the bed before you can respond.

He parts your legs wide, staring directly into your core. You clench around nothing, pussy weeping for him to fill you up. “So pretty” he whispers, kissing his way up from your ankles until his breath fanned over your aching core.

Just as you begin to pull yourself up from the bed to hurry him along he brings his fingers to your folds, spreading you so his mouth can swallow your clit.

Your head drops back onto the mattress, back arching at the simple touch. “Fuck” you gasp, clenching your fingers around the material of the bed.

He moves your legs, bending them and pushing them up against your stomach. Opening you wider for him, his tongue slipping into your core, circling his tongue against your walls. “Jesus Christ!” You exclaim, your vision is blurry.

“Just me baby girl” John B chuckles, he’s inserting two fingers inside of you while his tongue laps at your clit. Your body is shaking, pleasure courses through your veins. “I’m gonna cum!” You cry, your walls pulsate around his fingers as he adds a third, angling them up against your g spot.

Your orgasm hits you at full force, knocking the breath out of you. Your legs shake against the bed, eyes squeezed shut as you let the pleasure rock you. “Shit shit shit”.

“That’s how much I need you”

You don’t give yourself time to recover, you're reaching for him. You needed him more than ever, shaky hands fumbling with the string of his shorts. He helps you remove his clothes, his cock swaying proudly.

“I’m going to fuck you now” he states, lining himself up against your hole. Your arms find home around his neck, both of your eyes training on where he eases himself in.

You both exhale, your fingernails scratch at his sun kissed skin. Chewing on your lower lip, he begins to rock his hips against you. His hair tickles your chin, his arms pulling you flush against him.

“You're perfect… I’ve missed you so much”.

“Show me how much… show me by fucking me hard… and fast”.

A switch seems to go off inside his head, he pulls your body away from the bed. Changing the position, your knees meet the mattress. He pushes you down until your cheeks press against the sheets, his hips connect with the swell of your ass.

His heavy balls hitting at your swollen clit with each thrust. The grip he has on your hips is harsh, red marks that are going to bruise. His cock hits deep into you, nudging at your sweet spot.

“Fuck… pretty girl, your magic” he exclaims, his hands run up the length of your back until they grip around the locks of hair, pulling you slightly away from the bed. “Your pussy is the best goddamn pussy I’ve ever had”.

You're clenching around him, his words stirring something inside of you. “Fuck.. John B, harder please!”. He quickened his pace, you try to look behind you but the grip on your hair stops you from doing so.

The sound of your skins meeting in the middle fills the small room, you can hear the bass from the music outside. You only just realise the curtains are open, anyone could walk by right now and see the predicament you were in.

This just has you more aroused, your soaking his thick cock. The wet sound has you arching your back and pushing back into him, your moans are growing louder and a sheen of sweat glistens on both your bodies.

“Shit… babe-”

Your words are cut short as he pulls out of you and repositions you, your legs straddling him. He pulls you down against him, his cock deep inside of you.

His hand presses against your lower stomach as he helps you move against him again, your body bouncing harshly as you chase your high. He can himself deep inside of you, grunts of pleasure leave his lips.

His eyes train on your breasts as they bounce with each thrust, he pulls himself up slightly to capture one between his lips. Sucking and pulling at your nipples, your finger nails dig into his skin.

Hips grinding and circling against him, the familiar tingle spreads from your toes up to the hair on your head. Goosebumps litter your body, arching your back as the wave of pleasure hits you once more and you're coming around his cock, walls sucking him as deep as humanly possible. “Fuck!”

“Oh shit… shit shit shit” John B cries, he grips your hips. His own hips stuttering against yours as he orgasm floods through him, he pulls out of you, his cum coating his lower stomach.

You move to sit next to him, regaining your breath. Your eyes meet his and he moves to kiss your lips.

“I promise to make up for everything, I promise to prove to you everyday why it was a good idea for you to take me back.. I promise to be better” John B states, his hand cups your face. Thumb caressing your cheek, you give him a soft smile.

All you could do was move forward, you can forgive and forget and see where the future takes you both. “Okay, let’s do this”.

You meet in the middle, lips pressed together once again.

Tagging people who wanted part 2 @novxturient @thirsty4nonlivingmen @thekidscallmebossss @bigenergy777 @gillybear17 🖤

[rafesfavoritegirl]

where currents collide

chapter 2: escape

𓂃⋆.˚ Viv, John B’s younger sister, just wants to escape the chaos of the pogues for a little while, after John B decided she can't come to a Kook party. After a night of tension and betrayal, she seeks some peace on her own, but it’s never that simple when you’re surrounded by the Pogues. What starts as a quiet moment alone on the beach turns into something unexpected when old wounds and new faces collide.

word count 1.1k

Content Warning: Mild language, emotional conflict, sibling dynamics, mentions of substance use, and tension-filled situations.

Trigger Warning: Mentions of family trauma (loss of a parent), emotional distress, mild substance use (marijuana), and moments of secrecy and betrayal.

As I watched everyone leave the house, I accepted defeat with humility. They were always going to perceive me as a little girl. I was disappointed in Jj most of all. He never used to choose sides. But now, knowing how he really felt, it stung to realize he was just like the rest of them. It all left me mentally and physically drained, pushing me to take a nap and escape for a little while from everything that had happened.

༄ ༄ ༄

I woke up feeling dehydrated, still unsettled by everything that had occurred earlier tonight. In an effort to clear my head, I decided to build a bonfire. I do not often get the house to myself, so I figured it was the perfect chance. Stepping into the yard, I spotted the hammock that Jj, John B, and I had put up when we were kids, still hanging from the tree. I grabbed some extra firewood to revive the ashes from the bonfire a couple nights before and headed back inside for a lighter, my phone, and my headphones.

Once I was back in the yard, I started to light the fire. When the flames finally caught, I settled into the hammock, slipped in my earbuds, and blasted my favorite playlist. The cool breeze brushed against my face, and for a moment, I realized maybe it wasn't so bad to have missed out on the chaos of tonight.

Just as I started to get comfortable in the silence combined with the arguments that happened previously, I did not hear the infamous sound of the half-broken twinkie entering the front yard, muffled by the music still in my ears. Once settled in, they made their way into the backyard, and suddenly, I could not ignore the look on their faces. They sat down, unintentionally crashing my bonfire, their eyes landing on me in my relaxed state.

"See? Told you staying home wouldn't kill you," John B said with a smug grin, clearly pleased with himself.

It only fueled my internal anger, making it burn even deeper. How could they sit there, knowing I was still upset? No apology, just laughing and reminiscing about the greatest night they have ever had, like nothing was wrong. Seeing my best friends ignore my existence, continuing to smile and laugh while I sat there in utter silence.

Hearing them all talk over one another, what caught my attention was Kie's voice: "Dude, when Jj brought the gun! I swear we were gonna get arrested," she said, and the rest of them laughed, agreeing with her.

I pulled off my headphones, cutting in. "Wait, what gun? What happened?" I asked, concern and curiosity creeping into my voice.

Kie dismissed me with a casual wave. "It was nothing," she said, laughing as she spun around, her back turned to me once again.

That was it. I stood up abruptly, my frustration boiling over. "Fuck this," I muttered, walking off without another word.

I headed to my room, shutting the door behind me, and sat down. For a moment, I just stared at the wall, my mind racing, trying to figure out what to do next. It took a moment, the silence giving me too much space to think.

༄ ༄ ༄

The bright white full moon shined through my window, and suddenly, an idea sparked. I needed to get to the beach—just to clear my head. I knew everyone was asleep by now, either in the living room or in John B's room, given the lack of space in our house.

That thought reminded me of how I would get there? The idea hit me out of nowhere, like a sudden rush of clarity. I could just take Jj's weed and the keys to his dirt bike. I needed a way to get out—escape, even if just for a little while—and the bike would get me to the beach in no time. Jj would not even notice, right? It was not like he was gonna miss it tonight, or even notice it was gone. Fixating on the thought, I convinced myself I would be back in time.

I knew where he kept everything—he always kept his stash of marijuana in that jar on the communal nightstand, and the keys to his bike were usually tossed carelessly on the dresser. I could not even explain why I was doing it, but it felt like the only way to get some space.

With that thought in mind, I quietly crept toward his room, my heart racing, but my mind set on the plan. I quietly opened Jj's door and paused for a moment, glancing at him as he slept, admiring how peaceful and cute he looked. A rush of guilt hit me—doing this behind his back felt wrong, but I could not shake what he had done. I knew he would be furious if he found out, but I had to go through with it. I tiptoed over to the drawer, quickly sorting through his mess, finding condoms and loose jewellery, until I found his dirt bike keys, weed and rolling paper. I left the house swiftly, starting up the bike, the engine roaring to life. I glanced back at the worn-down house, checking the window to see if I had woken anyone up. Coast clear. I grabbed the items I needed, then rushed out of his room, with everything at hand, I knew there was no turning back now.

༄ ༄ ༄

The moon reflected off the blue ocean as I parked the bike and made my way down to the beach—the same one the Pogues had visited not too long ago during their rioting. A few kooks were still hanging around, but I paid them no mind. I spread out my blanket and got ready to roll up.

I sat there, the mix of marijuana and saltwater breeze filling the air. For the first time in a while, I felt at peace, the worn-down headphones that I had earlier playing softly as I drifted into a stoned calm.

The kooks from when I had first arrived were packing up. Their infamous jeeps slowly rolled off the beach, and a part of me did not care, but another part felt relieved to be completely alone now—no talking, no people. Just silence.

That was until I saw a tall, shadowy figure making its way toward me. I did not think much of it, assuming they would just pass by. But then, without warning, the figure sat next to me. I was confused—though, in my stoned state, it did not register right away. I glanced to my right and froze. It was none other than Rafe Cameron.

Follow the wattpad, this fanfic will be posted consecutively every week with new chapters! : https://www.wattpad.com/user/rafesfavoritegirl-

[a-aexotic]

hii i feel like john b doesn't get nearly enough fics and i <3 your writing so could i request a fic where he's having a rough day so he comes over and reader does her whole nighttime routine w him to help de-stress? 💗💗

ren's notes ! yes i totally agree, john b is so overhated for what

pairing. john b x fem!reader

warnings. literally nothing except fluff and ward being ward

➜ missing out on updates? ❪ navigation. masterlist. taglist. ❫

Today was not John B's day.

He woke up in a shitty mood and everything else just went along with that. He burnt his pancakes, he forgot to pay the water bill so he was stuck with cold water as a shower. He forgot to do laundry so he had to wear his dirty clothes. And the Camerons were being more asshole-ish than usual.

He just wanted to go home and eat, relaxing while watching a TV show. So why did Ward make him clean the yacht for the second time this week?

He texted you throughout working and you felt really bad. You wanted to do something that would cheer him up.

He heard a ding and pulled out his phone.

Y/N:) 💋☀️ oh, im sorry to hear that baby:/

Y/N:) 💋☀️ do u wanna come over and watch something?<3 maybe that'll help

Y/N:) 💋☀️ i love u jb:)

He smiled at your texts as he sent a quick text back, not wanting to hear another lecture about phones from Ward again.

JB 😎 No worries babe 😘💕 I love u too

JB 😎 That sounds like heaven 😫 Be there at 6 x

--

Work couldn't have even sooner for John B. He was so excited to go see you; he's felt like it's been weeks even though in reality, it's only been maybe a day. Today just felt so long but he knew that one kiss from you, and all that stress would go away.

He pulled up to your house and quickly got out. He was prepared to spend the entire night with you, sleeping in your arms so that all his stress would melt away.

He knocked at the door and your mother answered, letting him know you had just got down with your shower and that you were upstairs. She also reminded John B to knock before going in.

As he was told, he knocked before going in.

"Mom, I'll be down in a minute, let me finish my skincare."

"It's not mom, It's John B."

You quickly jumped out of your chair and ran to the door, opening it and embracing John B. He smiled at your enthusiasm.

"Oh, John B. I missed you."

He leaned into you, sighing in content. "Me, too, baby. Me, too."

"I was just going to finish my skincare and we can go get some popcorn and eat, okay?"

"Um, actually. I think after the day I've had, I need a mask."

You smiled at your boyfriend. Your glad your skincare is rubbing off on him because you wanted him to relax (you also didn't want him to age badly). "Of course, baby! Just uh, go take a quick shower and we can get started!"

He didn't even have the energy to be offended at your underlining comment so he just nodded and went into your bathroom, closing the door.

As he showered, you got the candy and popcorn ready. He got out and he sighed in relaxation. He then looked at the bowl next to your bed to find his favorite candy. "Ooo."

He took a handful before you came in with a huge grin on your face. "Okay, we have either a peach collagen mask or a vitamin d matcha mask."

He laughed immaturely at the mention of D. "Vitamin D, of course."

You rolled your eyes playfully as you put down the other mask, opening the vitamin d sheet mask. "Did you wash your face?" You asked before putting it on.

"Yes."

"With my CeraVe cleanser?"

He nodded and sighed as if that was the most obvious thing in the world. But if you asked him that a few months ago, he would've asked who CeraVe was and what a cleanser is. You're glad you've taught him well.

You smiled at that, nodding. "Good."

You put on the mask and John B felt his muscles relaxing from your soft touch, and the gentleness of the sheet mask on his face. "This feels so nice. I can't remember a time when I didn't use masks."

"Mhm, I bet your skin feels the same."

He sighed contently as you fully adjusted the mask to his face. You walked away towards your mini-fridge to get a Jade roller. You went back to John B and started massaging his face with it.

"Wow, this feels nice. Is how the rich feel?" John B commented as you laughed.

You kept massaging for a few minutes before stopping, making John B groan. You rolled your eyes.

"My arms hurt, John B, I can't do this until it dries."

He sighed and nodded, "Okay fine."

John B then went to go sit on your bed and turn on the TV as you put your mask on. John B then went to the bedside table and grabbed the popcorn, eating it happily.

You smiled at your boyfriend. You're glad that he feels better now. You got into the bed too, taking some of the popcorn and eating it.

"Okay, babe. It's your pick, what're we watching?"

"21 Jump Street."

You sighed. "... Again?"

"Oh shush, I know you love staring at Channing Tatum."

You rolled your eyes playfully, knowing it was true.

[maybankspov]

The Heart Wants What It Wants ♡

Summary: Y/N is John B’s girlfriend and has been for over a year. Her and Jj have a weird relationship, They’ve always cared very deeply for each other, even after all the awkwardness and blunts remarks. But recently Jj’s is starting to see the girl in a way only his best friend should.

Warning: ANGST!! Jealousy, Cheating. Not much else i don’t think :)

Italics: JJ’s POV

The Heart Wants What It Wants

The Pogues had always been a tight nit group ever since they were younger especially Jj and John B. They had been best friends ever since the third grade, you would never see one without the other. They were like brothers growing up together practically living together due to Jj’s family situation. But just like any other friendship there are some times where the don’t see eye to eye, even if it is over a girl.

It all started when John b introduced her to the Poges for the first time. “Guys this is y/n” John b announced as he walked in his own home after picking her up from work on a Saturday afternoon. “The girl I’ve been telling you about, My girlfriend.” Jj looked up and was met with a girl he had never seen before, he’d remember a face as gorgeous as hers. “Hey, it’s so nice to meet all of you. John B never shuts up about you guys “ she says with a massive smirk on her face as she bumps her hip into JB’s. He wraps his arm around the back of her neck and brings her into his chest. “Alright shush you” he says with a huge smile on his face as he lets out a breathy laugh which the rest of the pogues return. Except for one. JJ turned to look at both Kie and Pope hoping to see if he can predict what they’re thinking of this girl however he was met with two admirable faces looking up at the happy couple. They seemed to approve so why was he conflicted over the matter.

That night Jj had spent his time ignoring her, watching her from the sidelines. He watched the way she interacted with each one of his friends. Her and Kie immediately clicked bonding over similar clothing styles and their passion for saving the environment. Her and Pope managed to get along like brother and sister, he never shut up when she was around. Immediately feeling comfortable around the new girl which is weird for him, he’s always been a bit of an introvert. Jj tried to shut out every affectionate interaction her and John B had together. He still didn’t understand why but everytime he’d find his eyes glancing over at the happy couple his chest immediately felt tight.

It’s not like Y/N shut Jj out she just felt odd around him. From the beginning their interactions were limited to small nods when greeting one another, tight lipped smiles whenever they said goodbye. It was awkward and neither one of them truly understood why. John B had told y/n all about Jj and how well they would get along but to his dismay the blonde wouldn’t even look in her direction. She had tried to speak to him that Saturday night when she met them all but it didn’t go the way she thought it would.

“Jj right?” She announced her presence as she took a seat beside him on one of the logs that was situated around the fire, Pope had set up for us. “Yeah” he replied, very bluntly. Anyone from the outside could tell he felt awkward. Like he didn’t know what to say to her. “Wow, I’m glad to be finally meeting the Jj. How are you?” She asked him politely with an adorable smile finding its way onto her face, whilst also turning her body towards his. He shifted his eyes to look at her, he swear he felt his heart beat in his stomach. He didn’t understand why he was so nervous maybe it was the feeling of a brunette headed pogue watching their interaction. “I’m fine” he answered her question with a slight nod of his head. A moment of silence is shared between the two as she looks over at her boyfriend with wide eyes. John B lightly scowled at his best friend confused by his behavior his eyes shifted back to his girlfriend and light shuck his head silently telling her to “leave it “ assuming Jj’s in one of his moods. She lightly pressed her hand against Jj’s shoulder as she stood and made her way over to John B. Jj couldn’t help but feel clarity as she walked away from him, like he could breathe again however a small feeling inside of him longed for her to come back.

One night y/n hadn’t been able to sleep so she unwrapped her boyfriends arms from around her waist and went out to the front porch to smoke. As that usually seemed to calm her down when she felt this way. Unknowing to her, Jj had been feeling the same way. Lying wide awake facing the ceiling, thoughts running his mind and they all had the same common denominator which was indeed, his best friend’s girlfriend. The girl he’s barely spoken a few words to. It turns out great minds think alike as he finds himself walking towards the porch with a freshly rolled blunt in his hand.

The floorboards cracked underneath his feet which caused the attention of the young girl curled up on the couch to look up at the disruption. Jj stopped in his tracks as soon as he saw her sat there, the only thing his mind could comprehend at that moment was how fucking hot she looked smoking a blunt, wearing nothing but an oversized t-shirt which he recognized was John b’s. “Sorry i don’t know you were out here, i-uh i’ll just go” he quickly turned away planning on walking back inside the chateau and forgetting this ever happened. “Y’know, You don’t have to do that” she said whilst lifting one of her hands up to her face, taking another hit off her blunt. “Do what?” He asked her once he stopped and turned back around. “Leave as soon as you see me.” Jj turned his head towards the girl, to see that her attention was focused on the marsh. His insides feeling torn between walking back inside or sitting beside the girl which he so desperately wanted to do. “What are you looking at?” He asked her. “The water, the way the moon reflects its light on the water is so pretty” she said without moving her eyes from the spot she was fixated on.

Jj’s face immediately relaxed feeling most of his awkwardness slip away as he took a seat next to the girl and began to pull out his blunt from his front pocket. She suddenly clears her throat getting his attention as she offered him hers. “What’s the point in lighting another, save that for another time” she lightly winked at me. Jj swore he felt his heart beat quicken in pace and his face immediately redden. He smiled back at her as he lightly took the blunt from her delicate hand lingering ever so slightly as their fingers brush against each-other. They just sat in silence for the next few minutes sharing a blunt, as she ever so often looked out at the marsh which caused him to do the same thing. She was right. The way the light would reflect off the sky and hit the water was truly beautiful. But not as beautiful as the girl sat beside him. No! This is his best friends girlfriend he shouldn’t think of her in that way but he just couldn’t help it. “I think i owe you a bit of an apology.” Jj began to say, “ya think” she replied. He couldn’t help but laugh at her reaction matching the expression of the smiling girl on his side.

“Yeah I- um, i don’t really know what came over me, i- uh, i guess you could just say” Lie Jj. Lie. “I’m not use to John b having a girl round all the time” i said to her as she hung on to my every word. “Like he’s never stuck to one girl before. Usually he just fucks them and forgets them” i tell her honestly.

“Wow, i feel honored” she says back to me which caused a smile to appear on my face. I cant help it. I know i shouldn’t be feeling this way about my best friend’s girlfriend, i mean it’s just wrong. Not to mention I’ve only just met the girl, i don’t even know her that well but there’s something about her. I’ve never felt this way before. And of course it had to be for her if all people. “No i get it, you were we worried about your friend. Don’t worry i won’t break his heart.” She actually thought i’d be happy about that. I mean i-uh guess i am. I don’t wanna hurt John B but i wouldn’t be upset if they summarily harpooned and there weren’t together anymore. “Um yeah i guess” I quietly mumbled which i don’t think she heard. Thank fuck.

We had spent most of the night on the porch smoking, laughing about absolutely nothing. We even managed to move ourselves so we were more relaxed. She had moved so her back was facing the arm rest with a pillow supporting her as she faced me with her legs out situated on top of my lap. I was in a similar position with my hand on her leg. We were so high right now, i don’t think she minded that i was touching her in quite an intimate place. I did know what i was doing, like i knew that if John b were to walk out the front door and see my hands on her leg he would probably beat me up but… in this moment i didn’t really care. It was just me and her.

“Y’know when i first met John B, i low key thought he was quite annoying” she giggled in a slight daze, it was adorable to watch. I smiled at what she just said a bit of hope started to rise in my stomach as i thought the high had given her the courage to tell me if she had any doubts Shoot her and JB’s relationship, which i am all for. Since we finished her blunt, we had decided to use mine. So it’s safe to say we are so fucking high right now. It’s actually made me realize why I’ve been feeling this way, i like this girl. I actually like my best friends girlfriend, all i’ve wanted to do this past month I’ve known her was go up to her, hold her, kiss her but i couldn’t. I had to sit and watch John B do everything i wanted to do. It hurt. It hurt a lot.

“Phh, oh-yeah, he’s always been like that I don’t think he’ll ever stop” i can’t help but subconsciously smile everytime she goes to say something. She opens and shuts her mouth obviously wanting to say something but just doesn’t now how. “Go on, say what you wanna say. You can tell me anything” i leaned forward testing the waters and placing my hand higher up on her leg. I saw her eyes moved down to my hand i actually couldn’t tell what she was thinking. I didn’t know wether she liked the affection i was giving her or if she wanted me to stop. “There’s just something about him. I feel safe around him. Like over the past few months, if anything were to happen like if we saw a bunch of kooks or even if we were just crossing the street. He’d hold onto my hand” she placed her hand on top of mine and leaned forward. I visibly gulped as she came closer to my body. “He’d squeezes it twice” she squeezed my hand twice. Her face felt much closer to mine than it really was but that didn’t stop me from looking down at her lips. Imagining myself kissing her in this moment. All the thoughts surrounding John B and how he would feel if i kissed her went out the window. It was just me and her. No one else. “It was almost like he’s letting me know I’m safe, like I’m loved” After she said that my eyes snap back to meet hers. Her eyes weren’t looking at me she was looking out at the damn marsh again. I don’t like where this is going.

“I think i love him Jj”

“We sat on the beach last night and i told him the same thing i told you, about the way the moon reflects its light on the water and how pretty it looks. After i said what i said, he told me i was prettier than any of that.. I think that was the moment i knew. I love him. So much.”

Jj hasn’t sobered up that quickly in his life. He felt a sudden pressure behind his eyes after hearing her declare her love for his best friend. He could feel his eyes glaze over but he didn’t want her seeing that. “Maybe go tell him that then” Jj said, whilst trying so hard to avoid her ongoing gaze. He had removed his hands so that not one ounce of his body was touching hers. The instant warmth he felt from being so close to her quickly washing away and was replaced with a bitter breeze. “Your right Jj, I’m gunna tell him. Thank u for everything, I enjoyed tonight maybe we can do it again sometime” he sent her the fakest smile he could matter, as well as a small nod when he looked up at her. She had stood up ready to go back to her boyfriend but before she left she reached over and placed her lips on my cheek before heading through the doors of the chateau.

Well, I’m 100% fucked.

[consciouscarrot]

john b routledge tags

[strrynigghts]

— series

— oneshots

[gxdsfavgal]

OBX Miscellaneous

⋆❀˖° 𖦹𓇼.ೃ࿔*:･

Insta Stories

Pogue Summer

Season 1 Vibes

[cameronsprincess]

John B. Masterlist

smut = ☆ angst = ❀ fluff = ♡

one shots:

↠ john b snaps at bimbo!gf!reader ☆

↠ sharing is caring (ft. jj)☆

moodboards:

↠ john b in a zombie apocalypse

[rafesfavoritegirl]

where currents collide

chapter 13: where the waves lead

*last chapter of this fic*

𓂃⋆.˚ Viv struggles with Rafe ignoring her after a drunken call the night before. Determined to confront him, she attends a Kook party with Sarah. At the party, she discovers Rafe kissing another girl, sparking a heated argument where he accuses her of harboring feelings for Jj. The confrontation escalates, drawing Jj into the drama. After a chaotic fight involving Rafe, Jj, and the Kooks, Jj defends Viv, but later, an intimate moment between them ends abruptly when Viv realizes her heart still belongs to Rafe. Conflicted, she finds Rafe at the beach, and their emotional reunion leads to a passionate kiss, rekindling their connection.

word count 1.9k

content warnings: underage drinking, toxic relationships, heated arguments, physical violence, emotional manipulation, and romantic tension, smut.

As we made our way home, laughter and reminiscing filled the air, the memories of tonight still vivid. I couldn’t believe Jj had defended me—it felt surreal. Once we arrived, everyone drifted to the back of the house to set up a bonfire. Meanwhile, Jj climbed onto the couch, his usual carefree self.

I glanced around to make sure no one was nearby before mustering the courage to ask him something. “Hey, I want to take my dress off... could you unzip it?” My voice came out softer than I intended. Without a word, Jj followed me as I headed to my room.

As we stepped inside, he quietly closed the door behind him, turning the lock with a soft click. I turned to face him briefly, then quickly pivoted, presenting my back. His fingertips lightly traced along my spine, brushing my hair forward over my shoulder. The warmth of his hand resting gently on my shoulder sent an unexpected shiver through me.

He slowly unzipped my dress, the fabric slipping away to reveal a navy blue lace bra and matching panties that complemented the dress perfectly. His hands lingered at my waist, and his voice was low and filled with something unspoken as he murmured, “You look really sexy.”

Before I could process his words, I turned and kissed him, instinct overriding thought. His hand tangled in my hair, pulling me closer, deepening the kiss. His other hand traveled down my back, skillfully unhooking my bra. The bra fell away, and he paused just long enough to admire me. He moves his hands back firmly around my waist, lifting me effortlessly as he carries me to the bed, my legs wrapping around his waist.

Our lips never parted as he lowered me gently onto the mattress, his body pressing against mine. The heat between us built as his hands roamed, his fingers unbuckling his belt and unbuttoning his pants without breaking the rhythm of our kiss. His touch was everywhere, igniting sparks as he reached into my nightstand, retrieving a condom. He asked me “Are you sure?”

His words hit me with a storm of emotions, was I ready?, a sudden realization struck me, freezing me in place.

“I can’t do this,” I said, pulling a random shirt on my bed back over my head, my voice trembling.

Jj froze mid-movement, his shirt nowhere to be found and his jeans unbuttoned. “Did I do something wrong? What happened?” he asked, confusion and worry etched on his face.

Without answering, I turned away, grabbing my phone from the bedside table. The screen lit up with a string of missed calls and texts from Rafe, all filled with apologies. My heart sank. Shoving the phone into my pocket, I began hastily putting my clothes back on.

Jj, now attempting to get fully dressed, zipped up his fly and moved closer. “Can you at least tell me what I did wrong?” His voice cracked slightly, frustration creeping in.

“It’s not you,” I mumbled, fumbling with my jacket and slipping on my shoes.

“Not me?” he repeated, his tone sharp. “So, what? We almost fuck and then you just decide to dip?”

I hesitated, my hand gripping the doorframe. The words I was about to say felt like a dagger in my chest, but they needed to be said. “I’m sorry, Jj,” I whispered, my voice barely audible. “But I think I’m in love with Rafe.”

His face fell, disbelief flashing in his eyes. “What?” he started, but I didn’t let him finish.

Before he could say anything more, I grabbed the keys to the Twinkie from the counter and bolted for the door.

“Wait—just stop for a second!” Jj called after me, but I didn’t turn around. My footsteps echoed in the hallway, and within moments, I was gone.

Jj stood there, alone in the silence, staring at the spot where I’d just been, his fists clenching at his sides.

Frustration bubbled up, but it wasn’t enough to deter me. My heart led the way as I decided to drive to the beach—the one where we’d had our first real conversation. It felt like the only place I might find some clarity.

The drive blurred past, my mind racing with what-ifs and unanswered questions. When I finally arrived, I parked the Twinkie and stepped out, the salty breeze hitting my face. Kicking off my shoes, I grabbed them in one hand and began walking across the warm sand.

I think to myself as I drive, If he isn’t here, it’s a sign. I’ll take it as a loss and let it go. 

The sun was dipping low, painting the sky with a mix of blue and black tones. I made my way toward the shoreline. My feet sank into the soft sand with each step, my heart pounding harder the closer I got.

Then, I saw him.

A tall, lean figure stood in the distance, facing the horizon. Even from afar, I recognized the way he carried himself—the sharp line of his shoulders, the effortless confidence in his stance. My breath hitched as realization hit me.

It was Rafe.

He hadn’t seen me yet, and for a moment, I froze, torn between relief and anxiety. But there he was, exactly where I hoped he’d be. 

I tapped his shoulder gently to get his attention and murmured, “Hey.” He turned at the sound of my voice, his eyes widening slightly in surprise. “Viv?” he said, his tone unsure but warm.

I stepped around him so we were face to face, my heart pounding. Before I could even find the words, he pulled me into a hug. His arms felt strong, and his voice was filled with regret. “Viv, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have treated you the way I did.”

I hugged him back tightly, but after a moment, I pulled away just enough to look him in the eyes. “Rafe, I don’t care about that,” I said softly. Then, without hesitation, I leaned in and kissed him.

The moment our lips met, something shifted. It was different from my kiss with Jj—this felt real, raw, and everything I’d been craving. The kisses deepened, growing more passionate as the seconds stretched.

Rafe broke away briefly, his eyes meeting mine, filled with longing. Without a word, he tugged his shirt off hastily, the fabric flying to the side. His hands found the hem of my shirt, and he paused. “Can I?” he asked, his voice low and rough.

I nodded, my breath catching, and he pulled it over my head in one swift motion, his lips capturing mine again with even more intensity.

The heat between us built quickly. I tugged at his belt, fumbling slightly before he took over, unfastening it and dropping both his pants and boxers in one smooth motion. His hands slid to my waist, pulling my shorts down and leaving me as bare as he was.

Now, with nothing between us, the air felt electric, and all that mattered was the closeness we’d been denying for so long.

We lay down on the soft sand, his hands gently guiding me as if to ensure every movement felt right. His touch was deliberate, exploring every curve of my body, his fingers trailing over my skin with reverence. He pressed kisses along my neck, his lips warm and lingering.

Slowly, he worked his way down, his mouth brushing against my collarbone, then my stomach, tracing the delicate curve of my waist. His kisses grew more purposeful as he reached the soft space between my stomach and thighs, holding me gently by my legs as his lips explored the sensitive skin just above my vagina.

He paused, lifting his gaze to meet mine, his eyes asking the unspoken question: Are you sure? This time, I answered aloud, my voice steady despite the rush of emotions. “Yes.” This was what I wanted—what I had been longing for.

With a knowing look, he leaned in closer, his lips tracing the edges of my most sensitive places, teasing and gentle. A soft sound escaped me before I could stop it, and he chuckled quietly, the vibration adding to the heat building between us. He knew exactly how he was making me feel.

After a moment, Rafe shifted, climbing back on top of me. His voice was low and intimate as he asked, “Do you have a condom?”

I reached for the shorts lying beside us, pulling the small packet from the pocket and handing it to him, the anticipation palpable in the space between us.

Rafe ripped it open and put it on his aroused member. He looked down at me while hovering above, his eyes locking onto mine with an intensity that made my breath hitch. Slowly, he inserted it and he let out a soft moan. He continued to move within me, each thrust deliberate and filled with a deep intensity, his rhythm unwavering as he stayed connected to me. Our breaths mingled, heavy and ragged, the heat of the moment overwhelming every sense. Each movement sent waves of pleasure through me, and I clung to him, feeling the connection deepen with every passing second.

As the intensity reached its peak, I felt him tense, his movements becoming erratic, and with a shared cry of release, we both gave in, succumbing to the overwhelming sensation that swept over us like a tidal wave. He came out of me and fixed himself up. He collapsed gently onto me, his weight comforting as we both caught our breath, the moment lingering in the warm air around us.

After a while, Rafe propped himself up on his elbows, brushing the damp hair from my face. “You okay?” he asked softly, his voice tender. I nodded, a small smile tugging at my lips as I basked in the afterglow. He gave me a passionate kiss. 

He pulled away briefly to retrieve our clothes, helping me back into mine with gentle hands. He pulls on his pants and looks at me.

“Let's go eat,” he said, his tone light but caring. 

After sharing the meal together, Rafe packed everything up and offered his hand. “Come on, let's go to my place. You can stay the night.”

He drove us back to his house, his hand resting on my thigh the entire ride, the gesture reassuring and grounding. When we arrived, he led me inside, offering me one of his oversized shirts to sleep in. As we settled onto his bed, he wrapped his arms around me, holding me close. His warmth and care lingered as sleep eventually claimed us both.

༄ ༄ ༄

When morning came, sunlight filtered through the windows, casting soft shadows across Rafe’s room. I woke in his arms, my head resting against his chest. His steady breathing matched the rhythm of my own, and for the first time in what felt like forever, I felt at peace.

It was then that I knew—I’d made the right choice.

With Rafe, it wasn’t just passion or fleeting chemistry. It was the way he made me feel seen, the way he pulled me back to myself when I felt lost at sea. Despite everything we’d been through—all the chaos, the mistakes, and the hurt—he was the one who understood me in a way no one else could.

As I quietly slipped out of bed and into the soft light of the morning, I felt the weight of my decision settle in my chest—not as a burden, but as a certainty. This was where I belonged.

Looking out the window at the calm sea in the distance, I thought of the journey that had brought me here. It hadn’t been perfect, and I had made my share of mistakes, but those choices had led me to this moment, to him.

And for the first time in a long time, I felt free.

The End.

[nemesyaaa]

LITERALLY me while reading (stitch is my bby)

THIS IS SO SO SAD. BUT I LOVE GOOD ANGST LIKE THIS ESPECIALLY WITH JOHN B ?? I FEEL LIKE SAD PLOT FIT HIM VERY WELL. I NEED TO PLAY SOMEONE LIKE YOU BY ADELE. I MEAN I KNOW THIS IS NOT THE SONG CODED, BUT THE STORYLINE MAKE ME THINK OF THE SONG TOO'. AS ALWAYS, THIS IS AMAZING !! WHAT A BEAUTIFUL SERIES. TYSM !!! ✨

‘I’m sorry. I just have to see for myself. KFKZKDE NOT MY HEART BREAKING INTO YOUR WORDS

“you know that’s not true. look, listen to me—”IM NOT LIKE READER, I WILL BE SO WEAK IN FRONT OF JOHN B. I LOVE HIM SO MUCH. AND HIS VOICE TOO....

“i have to! okay i—” he takes a breath, ripping his fisherman cap off to run a hand through matted brown hair, streaks of silvery grey through the sides illuminated in the warm orangey light of the chateau that made your heart clench with fondness and familiarity. “its not right that i’m feeling this way for someone so much younger than me, and more importantly — it’s not right that you’re dating someone so much older! you should… i don’t know, be out there! experiencing the dating pool! going on dates with guys that are allowed to be seen with you! not… your dads friend.” he shakes his head, defeated. THIS IS SO ANGSTY ???? WHAT I TRULY APPRECIATE. THE MIXED FEELINGS THAT JOHN B FEEL MAKE ME WANT TO SHOOT MYSELF. LIKE HE WANTS THE READER SO BAD BUT HE DONT WANT HER TO WASTED HER YOUTH ?? THIS IS SUCH A FUCKING HARD ROLLERCOSTER ACTUALLY. I GOT HIM, BUT PLEASE, DONT YOU WANT TO BE HAPPY YOURSELF ????

“uhm, did you walk here in a storm? are you— what, have you lost your mind now?” HELLOOO MOTHERFUCKER (READER CORE LMFAOOO) SHES A BOSS

now you’re knocking at the older man’s door, shivering from the icy droplets that are tickling your hot skin. you feel feverish, wrong, all muddled up. john b was yours. THAT LAST LINE. YES. GURL. HE'S YOURS.

I THINK IT'S MY FAVORITE ONE-SHOT OF THE SERIE

⊹ ᜊ(ᜊ ´ ˘)੭ ♡ … DUMB & POETIC ♡

track eight of the short n’sweet series. pairing: dbf!johnb + reader. based loosely off the song dumb & poetic by sabrina carpenter. enjoy! ໒꒰՞ ܸ. .ܸ՞꒱

word travels fast when you’re hopelessly in love with your dads best and youngest friend.

rain was starting to spit down on the crown of your head as you marched your way up the dry grass to the chateau. a storm was headed your way, and john b was probably to give you a real earful at the fact you’d even walked here so late in the evening with a storm on the horizon but that didn’t matter. it seemed a feeble thing now, too focused on the tugging of your heart strings.

“old john b’s got himself a date.” your father had chuckled into his newspaper that morning and you froze at the sink, pouring milk into your coffee. your skin felt hot, eyes prickly.

“what?” you ask quietly, trying your hardest to sound unshaken by the news.

“the guys down at the garage stitched him up. i didn’t get involved, was too busy working but… yeah. finally getting himself out there. was wonderin’ when he might. times ticking for him.”

your milk pours over the rim of your now overflowing coffee mug and you curse, lurching to clean it up.

now you’re knocking at the older man’s door, shivering from the icy droplets that are tickling your hot skin. you feel feverish, wrong, all muddled up. john b was yours.

he’s frowning when he opens the door, and you don’t let him speak.

“is it true?” you yell over the wind, voice cracking and he pulls you inside by the arm.

“uhm, did you walk here in a storm? are you— what, have you lost your mind now?”

“is it true, john b?” you don’t lower your voice even though you’re inside now, infact your words are punctuated by a harsh shove at his chest. he stills, staring down at you solemnly and shamefully.

“i assume your…dad told you—”

“so this — us, it just means nothing to you?” you go in for another push, crying now and he catches your wrists, eyes softening sympathetically as he pulls you in.

“you know that’s not true. look, listen to me—”

“who is she?” you wail and he holds your wrists tighter.

“listen to me!” he raises his weathered brow, hands loosening around your wrists just enough to swipe his fingers gently in windscreen wipers on the skin. you stare up at him expectedly — fat tears even frozen on your cheeks and his shoulders drop slightly. how was he meant to compete? it wasn’t fair when you looked at him like that. “the guys at the garage set me up.” he explains calmly and you’re quick to cut him off.

“and you agreed! you could have just said—”

“i have to! okay i—” he takes a breath, ripping his fisherman cap off to run a hand through matted brown hair, streaks of silvery grey through the sides illuminated in the warm orangey light of the chateau that made your heart clench with fondness and familiarity. “its not right that i’m feeling this way for someone so much younger than me, and more importantly — it’s not right that you’re dating someone so much older! you should… i don’t know, be out there! experiencing the dating pool! going on dates with guys that are allowed to be seen with you! not… your dads friend.” he shakes his head, defeated.

“i don’t care about all that!” you step up to him, a glimmer of hope in your eyes.

“well i do!” he bellows back, and just like that it dies.

you crumple, heels of your hands coming to press into your eyes as you lower yourself to the floor. you mewl in devastation, salty tears burning into your retinas and he watches in heartbreak, heaving out a long sigh before lowering himself to the floor with you.

“its not fair! its not fair— just because shes older than me doesn’t mean — it doesn’t —”

“i know.” he mutters into your hairline, pressing a kiss there. you clutch his shirt like he’s the only thing keeping you tied down gravitationally to earth.

you get real worked up into hysterics so soon he’s calming you down the only way he knows how, straw-feeding you water as you sit in his bed wearing his clothes, still snivelling. he shuffles in beside you with a book, pulling your head to rest down on his shoulder and shushing you when you fight.

“you think y’know everything john b.” you croak, glaring at the dumb pretentious poetry book on his lap.

he clears his throat, flipping to a random page.

“though the night was made for loving, and the day returns too soon, yet we'll go no more a roving, by the light of the moon—” his husky voice begins to read, lulling you into that calm safe space that only he creates. there’s a lingering sadness in your chest when you drift off, knowing it could be the last time and between his words you’re sure you whisper a “dont go”. but you’re not sure whether or not you dreamt it.

you wake up at noon somehow. all that crying wore you out and it goes without saying with the situation you’re in, you didn’t have the greatest sleeping pattern. sticky eyes flutter from the alarm clock, to the absence of john b in his own bed beside you. you hope for the reassuring sound of coffee being stirred or the tv in the living room but the chateau is deathly quiet. once your eyes focus, you’re confronted with a note on the bed side table.

his familiar scrawl, it reads —

‘I’m sorry. I just have to see for myself.

— Yours, J.B ♡’

[blac-ivy]

One thing golden era Wattpad writers had going for them was that they knew the importance of a buildup. I'm of the opinion that the sexual tension is WAY more satisfying to read than the actual sex and quite frankly there is a serious lack of non smutty writing.

Like I really miss reading fics/ x readers that start from scratch. Meeting the characters, initial reactions getting to know them, the tension the jealousy the TENSION the freaking tension.

Looking and looking away when they get spotted, touches that feel like they linger but perhaps they didn't and they're both so hot for each other that they think it's wishful thinking. And I don't mean just sweet sunshine romances, darker works can have a buildup too but it seems like so much is just about getting to the smut instead of the psychological aspect.

Bring back the build up!!!!!!!

[a-aexotic]

hey so i was wondering if you could do like an angsty fic about john bs sister aka the reader dsting rafe, and then one day she gets into a fight with rafe and he won’t let her leave his house, like keeps her in his room or something. and john b finds out and him and jj help get her out and rafe finds out and is pissed sorry if this is a lot!

pairing. platonic!jj maybank, platonic!brother!john b routledge x fem!reader x rafe cameron requested? yes no

warnings. mentions of getting high/drink, an arugement, description of a fight but pretty much angst to fluff!

summary. when rafe gets high, he gets paranoid about y/n's friendship with barry's friend and traps you in his room. john b and jj come to the rescue.

➜ missing out on updates? ❪ navigation. masterlist. taglist. ❫

You had no idea how you ended up in this mess with Rafe. It started off with a smoke with his friends at the beach and now, it's escalated to Rafe and you arguing in his room.

You were usually the responsible one, always making sure everything is in order and everyone's fine, so how did you end up in this mess? John B was going to kill you when he finds out.

"Rafe, it was nothing, seriously!" You were angry at that point, the entire drive to his house had been him just screaming at you incoherently about cheating?

Rafe was shaking at that point, his eyes were red and you could tell he wasn't sober. That's something you will never learn to love about Rafe; his awful addiction to anything and everything unhealthy.

"I-I saw you Y/N!" He trembled angrily as he pointed an accusatory finger in your face. "With Barry's tall friend, I saw you! You and him obviously knew each oth-"

"From Chemistry, Rafe! We had Honors Chemistry sophomore year, I told you!" You explained but Rafe was just shaking his head.

"I thought you loved me."

You shook your head as you walked towards him, tears brimming in your eyes. "I do."

"Then why did you cheat?" His voice broke. That's when you realized that Rafe wasn't acting; he truly felt like you had cheated.

"I didn't Rafe, you did too many lines and now you're acting all crazy." You tried to explain and Rafe had turned almost immediately when he heard you say the word "crazy."

"Oh, I'm crazy?! Really?" He screamed. You jumped at the sudden yelling and you sat back in the chair as tears started falling from your eyes. He walked away towards the door.

"I'm not letting you out until you apologize." He walked out and closed the door, locking it. You thought he was joking until you had gotten up and tried to open the door.

"Rafe!" You screamed. "Let me out, Rafe! Seriously, this isn't funny! Come on, Rafe!"

After about 10 minutes of being in that room, you were tired. You didn't know how this would end. No one was home; not even Wheezie, she was at a sleepover so you were stuck until Rafe's manic had calmed down. You wanted to call someone but you left your purse in Rafe's car.

You thought you were done for until you heard a van pull up. You looked outside to see the Twinkie and you let out a breath of relief - John B was going to help you get out. Until you realized that Rafe was still home and John B was most likely very angry.

"Shit," you mumbled to yourself.

You saw JJ and John B exit the car and you didn't know how to prevent all of them from getting hurt; you would usually just make sure that all of them weren't near each other or draw the other one away, but how could you do that if you were locked in a room.

You then heard some banging at the door. You prayed to every higher power you knew to make sure all three of them don't get too seriously hurt. You didn't want to spend the rest of this godforsaken night in the ER.

You couldn't really make out anything they were saying downstairs but they were shouting. Then you heard one loud crash and some running upstairs.

You heard the door unlock and your heart jumped. The door revealed JJ and a very angry John B.

"What the hell, Y/N!" John B shouted as he sighed disappointedly. "Stay away from Rafe, I said. He's crazy, I said. He's an actual psychopath who will hurt you, I said. And what did you do-"

Before he could continue, you went up to John B and embraced him tightly. You were crying into his shirt; the fact that you weren't completely sober didn't help either. John B was shocked. He'd never seen you cry so hard in your life. You were usually the one to be the rock.

He held you tightly, putting his head on top of yours as JJ watched sympathetically.

"I love him, John B." You managed to choke out. "I swear, it's just when he's high."

JJ shook his head. "Y/N, he's just not a good guy."

You pulled away from John B, wiping your tears. "What'd you guys do?"

"Just gave him a good punch. He's passed out." JJ responded as Joh B nodded. "Let's get out of here before the beast awakens."

John B hit his arm as warning before getting a small, "Too soon, sorry."

John B put his arm around your shoulders comfortingly as you guys walked to the Twinkie. The drive home was pretty quiet but you got some answers.

John B was calling you and you hadn't answered but that wasn't like you at all and he knew something was wrong. He called it 'brother intuition.'

You didn't care what it was, you were just grateful they came and helped you. You were grateful to have such good friends.

[c6nrad]

❝I like to think it’s not so much how many years you get, but what you do with them. And JJ packed it in.❞

— John Booker Routledge

[karmasloverrr]

godspeed - rafe cameron

pairings- rafe cameron x maybank reader, established relationship

SZN 4 SPOILER!!!!!!!!!!!! you’ve been warned

this takes place in ep 10 right after everyone’s fighting and all that

———————————————————————————

The adrenaline was still running through your vains, like the hot, dusty sand you all found yourself in over the past couple of hours. Your hands are shaking, can’t fully grasp the weight of what you’ve just done.

“Baby?” You snap out of your shocked haze when a pair of comforting, familiar hands come to rest on the side of your waist , “a-are you ok?” His blue, stress ridden eyes bore into yours.

You take a shaky breath in, letting the gun you held drop to the ground below your feet. Wrapping your arms around his neck, you jump up into him. “He almost killed you, Rafe. I thought I was gonna lose you, I-I didn’t have any other choice, he was so close to-“, your rambling was paused by him shushing you quietly and rubbing a hand soothingly up and down your back, his other gripping the back of your head like his life depended on it.

“I know, I know, breathe Y/N, breathe” You were sobbing now. Not out of remorse for one of Dalia’s men, whom you had just shot dead out of defense for Rafe, but because you almost lost the love of your life.

Rafe pulls away, still keeping a hand on your back, keeping you close. “You just saved my life, Y/N. I’m so proud of you for being strong, it’s gonna be ok.” He was now using a thumb to wipe the tears falling from your eyes.

You nod frantically in understanding, sniffiling and leaning into his palms touch. Bringing a hand to his on your cheek, you intertwine fingers. “Are you o-ok? I mean you almost just got stabbed, Rafe. I don’t know what I’d do with myself if-“. He places both hands on your face now, demanding your attention.

“Hey, listen to me. You did exactly what I would’ve done if you were just in my situation, ok? Hell, I would’ve beat that fuckers face in before I let him get the chance to even go near you so don’t overthink this for a second, do you understand? I love you so much.”

You licked your lips and nodded. After Rafe had told you to stay with Kiara when he went to bide JJ some time with the crown, he got into trouble with one of Dalia’s men and hadn’t come back. You couldn’t stay still knowing he was by himself.

Despite protest from Kiara and how your brother needed you right now, you ran to look for Rafe. You could hear the sound of distress and punches being thrown before you could see them. Even through poor visibility you knew it was Rafe, your Rafe, being attacked. As you got closer you could see that he was being held at knife point and without thinking you pulled the gun out that rested at your hip and fired at the man’s back.

With JJ’s constant tutorials and a little bit of practice over the years you hit your target dead on. Except this time it wasn’t a beer bottle or a teddy bear, it was a human being and nothing could’ve prepared you for that.

Rafe continued to try and work you down from the shock and complete panic, rubbing your back and whispering sweet nothings into your hairline. He eventually brought a smile onto your face when he praised your accuracy and said how bad ass it was, “that’s my girl”.

“It was kind of badass wasn’t it?” He let out a laugh at your rebuttal. Even in your state of mind, the sound of it made your stomach tingle with butterflies.

“If I’m gonna be honest, after I realized what just happened and saw you standing there, I got a little turned o-“, you scoffed at his antics and pushed him away from you playfully. “Shut up.”

He pulled you back into him before you got any farther, wrapping both arms around your waist, in turn you grabbed his biceps, looking into the eyes that you love so much.

You let your smile fade a little when you saw his eyes glaze over, knowing he was about to get emotional.

“I’m serious, Y/N. You saved me and I couldn’t possibly thank you enough, please don’t feel guilty or anything like that. I would do anything for you too, y’know that.”

“I know, and seeing you like that, in that danger, made me sick and I-I just blacked out.” He nodded slowly in understanding, “but I’d do it again if it meant that you were ok.” you continued.

You were now the one stroking his arms in comfort, his head nodding up and down telling you he was processing it all. Now putting yourself on your tip toes to reach his face, you placed your lips on his in a loving kiss.

Pulling away, you placed your forehead on his. “It’s you and me, Cameron. Always.” He pulled away and placed a loving peck on the crown of your head, “Damn right, sweetheart.”

Taking his hand in yours, you began to walk back towards the direction that Kiara and JJ were. “Let’s go see if J found this fucking thing.”

Rafe scoffed but followed your lead, “I’ve had enough of this fairytale pogue sh-“, you gave him a ‘really?’ look, to which he held his hand up in defense and shrugged.

“They’ve made it this far, you’ve gotta hand it to them and besides, this is a little exciting don’t you think?”

He frowned and shook his head, “Almost just got stabbed to death but yeah, sure, having a grand old time.” You giggled at his sarcasm, used to it by now.

Walking up the hill, you exaggeratedly began to swing your intertwined hands back and forth to which he protested against immediately stating “this isn’t a rom-com, please stop” but deep down, he loved seeing you make light out of a shitty situation.

He knows it’s due to you being so used to doing it because of Luke growing up, which never fails to make his heart beat in rage, but everything in his world is ok, perfect, when he gets to see you smiling like this.

When you both reach the top, there’s an absence of your little brother and Kiara that causes your smile and stomach to drop. The sandstorm passed yet they’re still nowhere in sight.

“JJ?” you call out, in hopes that they’re possibly somewhere in ear range. Nothing.

“J! Kie! Guys?” You let go of Rafe’s hand, heading to go circle around the statue.

“Woah, don’t go by yourself. If they’re someplace close by they sure as hell didn’t stick around here, let’s head back towards the buildings. They probably met back up with John B and Sarah.”

You shook your head, “No, if they got the crown and were ok, they would’ve just came and found us. Rafe, somethings not right.” You started to head more towards the statue in hopes that they went a different direction but Rafe steps infront of you before you can get any further.

“Hey, stop. I know you’re worried but incase you forgot, it’s not just them that Daria’s men are looking for, ok? I’m not letting you get hurt in the process of trying to find them.”

You took the arm that he held out to his side as a barrier and shoved it. “Rafe, that’s my brother, please we need to at least look around the area and see-“ He began to side step along with you so you couldn’t move around him.

“I understand that, Y/N/N, but let’s use the brain I know you have and think rationally, alright? They probably went back with the group assuming we were there too, ok? Let’s start there.”

You shook your head in annoyance, you’ve always been stubborn and you’re certainly not budging about this. “All I’m saying, Rafe, is that we check around the area first, m-maybe they didn’t hear me when I yelled.”

“Baby, please listen to m-“

“John B! Pope! Y/N!”

You whipped your head to the direction of Kiara’s wail echoing through the air. A sound of desperation like you’ve never heard and don’t wanna hear again. “Oh my god.” you whispered in fear.

Rafe looked at you with agony in his eyes, recognizing the same fret in her voice that you did. Without any hesitation you took off down the hill, not listening to Rafe’s protest to “wait for him”.

Your mind was moving as fast as your legs, you didn’t know where you were going but it’s like your body knew exactly where to take you.

Weaving down and through the same maze like corridors that you had escaped from earlier led you closer to the sounds of your friends, “Kie?”, you yelled out in despair, now acknowledging Rafe’s footsteps a few seconds behind you.

You felt the room before you saw it, your stomach already declaring that somethings wrong, very wrong. Before you could brace yourself, you saw the image infront of you. Blood. John B shaking him. Kiara with her head on his chest and hands on his stomach. JJ.

“JJ?” you didn’t even recognize your own voice as it barely came out of your mouth, cracking and whispery, desperate and defeated.

Stumbling to a halt against Rafe’s chest, you felt your legs giving out from underneath you, a pair of arms coming to catch you before you collapsed. No, not him, please God, don’t do this to me, no. Rafe’s arms were the only thing keeping you stable while you began to crumble, him collapsing down to the floor with you as weeps exited your mouth, shaking your whole body.

You didn’t have to look at him very long to know he’s gone, you could feel it. Sobs and pleads from the group didn’t register against your own. It sounded so foreign coming out of your body. “He’s dead” you sobbed, physically feeling your heart breaking. “JJ, no”, you wailed. Your head feels a thousand pounds as you slowly lift it off the ground.

Rafe has his own placed against the top of your spine, his forehead making a known presence on your back, still gripping your arms as if you’ll go too if he doesn’t. To the best of your ability you try to stand, legs still feeling mush as you feel Rafe’s touch disappear the closer you get to your little brother.

Halfway through, you give up on the poor excuse for walking and collapse back to the ground again, now crawling towards his lifeless body. “JJ, wake up, please!”. The only sounds you can hear is the ringing in your ears, your sobbing screams and your heart breaking.

Your palm meets his face, already feeling so cold and lifeless, the exact opposite of JJ Maybank. “Please don’t do this to me. W-wake up, JJ!”. You continue stroking his cheek, patting it lightly a few times, hoping, begging, pleading for your brother to wake up.

Stroking his hair, you shake your head out of disbelief. Hushed whispers exit your lips, trying to reach the deepest parts of him.“I can’t do this without you JJ, don’t leave me.” It’s been you and him against the world, the shit hand you’ve been given wasn’t too bad when you had each other to fall back on.

Growing up you found solice in each other, you didn’t need anyone to help you or comfort you, you had your little brother and he had his older sister. When Luke was to drunk to help JJ get ready for school in the morning, it was you brushing his hair, picking out his outfit, making his lunch. With your mother long gone, you took pride in being that figure in his life and it was your greatest achievement, seeing the man he had turned into, no matter how rebellious and defiant, you loved him like your own, and now that he’s gone, what’s left for you?

“Who was it? Kiara, who did this to him?” you now turned your attention from JJ to Kie, her looking just as horrified as the rest of the group. A look of disgusted rage took over your face, your stomach bubbling with hatred.

She sniffled before speaking, “Chandler, h-he stabbed him, I- JJ saved me and gave him the crown, I don’t know- I can’t.” She began to sob, recalling the traumatic moment.

Motherfucker. If the betrayal wasn’t enough, knowing JJ was just trying to save his loved one and this is how he’s repaid?

You can’t see or think straight, one moment you’re mourning the loss of your best friend and the next you’re taking all the strength you have left and standing up with the gun on your hip, reloading the clip and heading towards the direction Kie said he went.

You don’t get very far before Sarah and John B rush to your side. “Y/N. Stay. We need you right now. Don’t do this.” You shake them off of you, sending your elbow into John B’s stomach in the process. “Get the fuck off of me.”

You whip around and point the gun at the group, they look at you in shock, not processing what’s going on. Your breathing is uneasy as you lick the forming sweat off your lips. “If any of you touch me one more time, I swear t-to God. I’m going to kill Groff and none of you are getting in my way.”

Looking around you see the faces of your best friends, sad, confused, and angry. The gun pointed at them has your stomach dropping. “I-I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it, I’m sorry.” The gun you have aimed at them is making you sick all over again.

Rafe takes a few hesitant steps forward when he sees you begin to rub your chest anxiously, knowing it’s your way of trying to work your way down from a panic attack.

“Sweetheart, put the gun down, ok?” None of his words are registering with you. He’s gone, he’s gone, JJ’s dead.

Rafe catches you just before you start to collapse again, this time into the comfort of his chest and arms. He takes the gun that’s hanging loosely from your hand and reaches it behind his back for John B to take.

“Rafe, he’s dead. He’s g-gone.” sobbing the dreadful words into his chest, his shirt catching your tears. You’re both on the ground now, him cradling you like a toddler as he rocks you back and forth in comfort.

“I’m so sorry, Y/N. I’m so sorry, baby.” He strokes your hair and rubs your back, soaking in all of your pain. Your sobs begin to muffle as the others join in with you, still begging JJ to wake up, to open his eyes and to come back.

The weight of the air feels similar to your chest, no matter how much comfort and apologies Rafe whispers into your hair, it’s still not enough, your baby brothers gone and he’s never coming back.

The warmth of the fire fans your face. Emotionally and physically drained is where you and the Pogues have found yourself. Rafe keeps a steady eye on you as your head leans against his shoulder, knowing the last time you spoke was a few hours ago when he buried JJ, none of you being able to bring yourselves to do it.

Stray tears slip down your face, your expression remaining uninterested and dry. The only sound that can be heard is an occasional sniffing from the group and the cracks of the wood in the dying out fire infront of you.

You feel Rafe’s heartbeat against your back and his chest move when he talks. “I don’t know. If it was my friend I’d probably go after the guy that just killed him, yeah?” You take a steady breath in, getting ready to defend him when Pope tells him to “shut up”.

“You guys think that JJ would just sit here if it was one of us?” The whole group turns its attention to you, knowing you’ve been far too quiet for far too long, like JJ, you can be a ticking time bomb in moments like these.

John B is the first to speak up, “We all know what JJ would do. He’d get even.” You nod, still looking at the fire, kicking some sand as you stand up to begin pacing in rage.

Rafe watches your moves carefully, ready to defend you and back you up for whatever you’re about to say. He trusts you and he’s knows your best interest, you could tell him the sky was purple and he’d agree, while placing a loving kiss on your cheek.

You shake your head in agreement, feeling the never subsided rage bubble back up into your throat.

“Revenge.”

———————————————————————————