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boogiewrites · 2 years

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Seeing Stars Pt. 23

Part 1 if you missed it!

The first half of the infamous third date. Eddie plans a romantic date for Star at a place that holds special meaning for them. They talk about their feelings, their rights, and wrongs and Star confesses her deepest wants and fears about their future and falling in love. Eddie'll be there to catch her.

CW: None really, this is fluff, confessions of love, two young people in love and being joyful and terrified at the same time. (This chapter was over 20k total originally so I decided to split it up.)

After Hellfire, the club stood under the awning in the dark, seeing the rain in the parking lot lights pour down. Eddie had very eloquently observed that it was pissing rain outside as they’d emerged from their D and D cave after their session. They stood and sighed, muttering about making a run for it or waiting it out.

“Steve’ll be here soon. He should pull up so we don’t have to get soaked.” Dustin sighed.

“I’m not in a hurry.” Star shrugged, sitting down the spare backpack of Eddie’s she was helping carry.

“We can wait it out, wait 'til you guys get picked up.” Jeff added, the technical owner of the car that brought the older three members who weren’t in a relationship together to the meeting.

“You can’t get wet or you’ll melt, witch.” Eddie teased Star with high brows.

“I think you’ve proven that harmful stereotype to be untrue many times.” Star snickered, leaning towards him as he snorted back and pulled her against his chest.

“Ew, guys.” Mike gave them a judgemental glare.

“No one listened to me when I said it would be annoying.” Gareth rolled his eyes and mocked. “Now we have to deal with her asking if she can seduce the DM every session.”

“I still think it’s funny.” she giggled.

“It is but,” Dustin shrugged. “I think trying to seduce a dragon would be funnier.”

“I can take one for the party. I’ll try seducing the enemies before we attack next time.”

“You’re gonna die.” Jeff cackled. “A lot. You’ll be 5 characters deep before the end of the campaign.”

“Oh no, you’d have to help me fill out a bunch of character sheets, Eddie.” she said with fake woe. “You haaaate that.” she lilted and smiled up at him, her chin on his chest as he met her gaze, both arms hugged around her as he leaned on the brick wall of the building.

“I hate it as much as I hate you.” he grinned and kissed her forehead.

“Ugh.” from the audience.

“That wasn’t even gross!” Star squeaked and mushed her cheek into Eddie’s chest.

“It’s the principle of the thing.” Gareth shrugged.

“I could make it so much worse.” Star threw her head back and laughed maniacally.

“You’re riling up the troops, sweetheart.” Eddie shushed her and stroked her hair, pushing her face back into his chest to shut her up.

“Fine.” she mumbled, content to feel the heat from his body against the cold air outside, her fingers messing with the hem of his worn Hellfire shirt under the jacket he’d held out and partially wrapped around her. The conversation kept moving around them. Star shushed and let the feeling of Eddie playing with her hair comfort her.

The familiar beemer jostles into view through the sheets of rain. The headlights bobbed over potholes in the parking lot to light up the night around it.

“Hey, how are my favorite nerds?” Steve rolled down his window, pulling as close to the overhang as possible. He was annoyingly charming with his white teeth glinting in the lamppost light and rubbing his fingers through thick unruly locks.

“Triumphant it would seem tonight my fair, simple Steve.” Dustin said perkily, walking towards the car.

“Good so I don’t have to listen to you whine about losing the whole drive home in this…. hurricane.” He motioned to the rain broadly.

"We're too far inland for a hurricane Steve." Dustin corrected.

“He's already found something else to whine about.” Mike joked.

“Well don’t you two look cozy?” Steve wiggled his eyebrows at the snuggled-up couple against the wall. They both waved in unintentional tandem.

“Because we are.” Star said with a smile.

“You good?” He nodded toward them.

“Never better.” Eddie grinned.

“Did they annoy the shit out of you guys with their little back and forth this whole time too?” The three members of Hellfire who weren’t well acquainted with Steve outside of going to school with him in previous years looked at each other confused by the whole intervention.

“Not so much annoying as frustrating.” Jeff shrugged.

“They’re more annoying now that they’re together, to be honest.” Gareth added with a nervous chuckle.

“Yeah, we have to deal with them flirting during sessions now.”

“I can’t be judgemental, flirting is my favorite pastime.” Steve grinned.

“We know how much you love to flirt with Eddie, Steve.” Star snickered. “Only person better at it than I am.”

“Did you do the thing I said?” He added with high brows.

“What thing?” Eddie looked down at Star amused.

“I told her she should say some cheesy stuff when you guys do your… rolling the dice stuff. The activate seduction spell or… whatever it is.”

“YOU told her to make that lame ass joke?” Garrett looked confused but amused.

“I told her to seduce the enemies. Might be a more fruitful endeavor.” Dustin added now settled into the backseat.

“That's kinda gross man” Steve muttered.

“You’ve been mad at me and it was the least suspecting person the whole time.” Star said proudly.

“Steve, you’re a nerd.” Eddie grinned. “Join the alliance and come play some time.” He sounded genuine and not as teasing as he expected to. “You’re already giving tips to Lady Sandys here, you might as well.”

“No way.” He shook his head. “I can help her come up with pick-up lines but that’s where my expertise ends.”

“I’ll get you one day Harrington. I’ll make you admit you’re one of us.”

“Not in your wildest dreams, pal.” He cheesed with a smile. “We still on for next week?”

“For sure. I’ll be sure to break the table this time when I give ya a big boot.”

“Please don’t.” He said with his signature arched brow, rolling up his window before bickering with the backseat audience and moving away.

“What the hell just happened?” Gareth asked, all heads turning to Eddie and Star. “I knew you were somehow friends with him,” he said speaking to Star. “But why are you watching wrestling with Steve the king Harrington?”

“Turns out he’s a pretty decent dude. She convinced me.” He motioned his head down to Star.

“I found out he was a good guy, and Eddie did too when he called him to pick me up when I got blackout drunk months ago. Then I have Robin in music class and they’re like attached at the hip. They come into the diner after work and we started hanging out. I don’t know how he was before but he’s a really nice guy.”

“That seems like the opposite of what he’d do to a girl at a party when he was in school.”

“After Wheeler, he did start slowing down. He quit hanging with Tommy and Carol, the pricks.”

“Yeah he got involved with the kids through Mike's sister somehow and they hit it off. He’s a good time.” Eddie added.

“He’s a reformed asshole from my understanding. I didn't expect a guy that pretty to not be a garbage person.”

“You’re gonna call another guy pretty in front of your boyfriend?”

“Eddies prettier.” Star giggled and turn to him, mushing his cheeks in her hands. “Aren’t ya my pretty boy?”

“It’s also just a fact.” Eddie mumbled from squished cheeks. “Believe me I wanted to hate him too.”

“Besides you’re not jealous are you babe?”

“Not really, no.” He shrugged. “You turned him down and not me so as far as I’m concerned that’s a big win for the nerds and a big fat goose egg for the yuppies.” He squeezed her tight.

“Of course I did.” Star said sweetly. “I’d say why but the baby-eared boys over there would boo me again.” She laughed.

“We’re gonna head out anyway. This is as light as it’s gonna get tonight. You two have your little date night now or whatever. We’ll see you at practice.”

“I’ve got some ideas for new stuff too! I’ve been working on those lyrics I brought last week.” Eddie added as they pulled their jackets and bags over their heads to run across the parking lot to their getaway vehicle.

“Sounds good!”

“Speaking of… when are we going on that date?”

“During the full moon.” He smirked.

“The full moon?” she hummed happily, melting into his chest.

“That’s when I wanted to do it.”

“During the…” she swallowed and took a noticeably deep breath. “ You’re planning things by the lunar cycle now?” She openly swooned, a shakey exhale with a batting of lashes.

“Mm-hmm.” He nodded, smirking as he watched her become flustered. “Big night. Big emotions. Big moon. Makes sense.”

“That’s… true.” She nodded biting her lip and looking at his. “You’ve never been more attractive.” She whispered her lips wet and open as she gazed up at him. “I have a man who takes the moon phase into account when planning a date?” She whimpered. “Jesus Christ I need to calm down.” She looked away as Eddie chuckled. “I didn’t think that would turn me on so much.” She said a bit high-pitched. “Need to save all that energy I suppose.” She looked back at him as he nodded. “What are we…” she shook her head to clear it. “Doing again?”

“It’s a surprise.” He said with a playful lilt.

“I needed to be comfy? Or wear shoes that wouldn’t hurt.”

“Dress warm, for outside. And yeah some good walking shoes.”

“We’re going on a walk somewhere?” She seemed genuinely interested in the idea and it eased his concern about her enjoyment of his idea.

“It’s a surprise.” He said again leaning in to press his forehead to hers.

“Eddie.” She pouted. “I don’t like surprises.”

“You trust me don’t you?”

“I do.”

“Then trust you’ll love it.” He grinned.

The nights now moving into April we’re still cold but manageable. The days were pleasant and bright when the rain wasn’t coming down. Luckily for them, the rain would hold off for tonight.

Star has been determined to stay cute and still be warm for the date. She had to wear some big boots because of the rain, knowing if they were outside she’d get muddy. But she wasn’t going to dress in something shapeless for a night like tonight. She wanted to feel pretty, to believe him when he called her so. As much as it was about them having a moment to truly reflect and talk, the physical manifestations of those emotions being out in the open were still very much on Star’s mind. She found herself wanting Eddie differently since they’d been together. She’d gotten her sustenance from cuddles and almost make-outs. But she had a new urge to want to crawl inside him. To be as close to him as physically possible. She wanted to kiss him and have them swallow each other whole. She felt a little weird, like some horny Leatherface who wanted to live in her boyfriend's skin. It was even entirely about sex! That was the wildest thing to her. She felt as if she couldn’t be close enough, couldn’t get anywhere near physical enough to properly convey how much she wanted to be with him. She was hoping she could have sex tonight. Not sex as she'd come to know it, but the words make love still made her nose twitch a little in embarrassment. But that’s what it was. She hoped her boyfriend would make love to her tonight. She chuckled, cracking a joke to herself about saving it for the honeymoon. Then she pouted, a happy one full of whimsy thinking about marrying Eddie. She shook her head, surprised at herself every time she thought about the things she’d made fun of before. She was hopeless and no better than any girl in a romantic comedy now. It felt too good to care.

She was still floating and giddy, hearing the hiss of tires on the damp road outside as she bopped around her trailer turning off lamps and gathering her bigger crossbody bag. She opened the trailer door and bound out, her hair and chest bouncing in her tight sweater before she came to a stop.

“What the hell?” She said with a crinkle of her face. “What are you doing here?” She squeaked out.

Steve Harrington was standing by his car, surprised at how quickly she left the airstream upon his arrival.

“Well don’t you look pretty all dressed up and excited.” His genuine compliment caught her off guard with batting lashes.

“I thought you were Eddie. We’ve got a date tonight. Wait, you know that.” She held out her hands in confusion.

“I do. That’s why I’m here. He sent me.”

“He… sent you?”

“I know what he’s up to. And I was tasked with picking you up and dropping you off.”

“And he can’t do that why?”

“Part of the surprise.”

“I ha-“

“Hate surprises. We know! Get in the car, we’re losing daylight.” He snapped his fingers. She obeyed and trotted in her layers of thick opaque tights under her corduroy pinafore. She ditched the puffy jacket in the car as the Harrington chariot was beyond toasty inside compared to the cavernous van Eddie drove.

“Can I get a hint?”

“Open the glove box.” Steve grinned. She popped the handle to find a map.

“I know we’re a bit out of town but are we going that far?”

“Nah.” Steve shook his head. “Or I’m not anyway.”

“I hate these riddles. This is real life, not D and D. I don’t want to be chauffeured by some bridge troll whose riddles 3 I must answer.”

“Good to know you’re not as big of a nerd as I thought.” Steve grinned.

“I’d be into this if I knew what was happening. I don’t play well with the unknown.”

“Relax. He had a cute idea. I gotta give the guy credit. Under my wing, he’s turning into a real lady killer.”

“We’re driving in the middle of nowhere so maybe saying he’s a lady killer isn’t the best choice of words?”

“Good point. He’s turning into a real charmer.”

“He’s always been charming.” She gave a blushing smile, looking down.

“Different strokes, different folks.” Steve shrugged.

“He charmed you out of your clothes you have no room to talk.”

“I told you, I let him borrow some clothes! That’s the weirdest way to say that.” He complained and Star laughed.

“He charmed me out of mine too Stevie doesn’t worry. No shame. You’re in good company.” She snorted. “We’re going on a hike?” She tapped her fingers over the highlighted path on the park's map.

“You are.”

“Alone?” Star frowned.

“It’s a walk it’s not even a hike.” Steve clarified. “You’re barely going a couple of miles and it’s all a well-beaten, marked trail. You’ll be fine.”

“I can navigate a city without much issue but throw me in the woods and I might as well just have bear food written on my forehead.”

“There aren’t bears around here.” He laughed.

“When you have to call out a search party tonight when I don’t show up to whatever this end point is you won’t be laughing.”

“Don’t be so dramatic. You and Eddie were made for each other I swear. The only two who could put up with your theater kid level energy.”

“It’s a lot like jock energy. Both very high-level and physical. Both involve a lot of handling balls.” Star chuckled.

“Except jocks do it in public and you do it in private.” Steve joined in on the joke.

“You handle plenty of balls in private, I'm sure Steve.”

“Oh, my Wednesday nights?” He snorted out a dorky laugh that made Star wanna pinch his cheek.

“I’m really glad you and Eddie became friends, you know.”

“Aw shucks.” He goofed. “He’s a good guy. A little weird but then again he thinks I’m a little weird so what does weird even mean anyway?” He Shrugged. “I’m glad you two are together too. For what it’s worth. You make sense together.”

“And we can do stuff like this now too. Him getting you in on his little schemes. Maybe we can all three hang out. Or four I should say, Robin would be furious if we left her out.” Steve laughed and nodded.

“You two can have the time you need alone tonight and once you come up for air from your nasty little love nest I’m sure you’re gonna disappear into this weekend you can call me up and we’ll plan something, alright?”

“I take it your part of this date is coming to an end?” She felt the car slowing, Steve pulling off the paved road.

“Afraid so.” He sucked his teeth. “That trailhead is the path on that map. This.” He grabbed a flashlight from the back seat and handed it to her. “Is for you just in case it starts getting dark. It shouldn’t be more than a half hour.”

“He better have something special at the end of this. Making me walk alone for hours.”

“Again with the theatrics. You like being out in nature. Get a good pace and enjoy the scenery. It’s really beautiful out here. Give it a chance.”

“Man, you can get a girl to agree to anything.” She pinched his cheek and he smacked her hand away making her laugh. “You’re right. I just hate not knowing.”

“Don’t worry. Don’t think about it too much. You two will have a great night. Use the walk to think of what you wanna say, you know? Get in the right headspace.”

“That’s the plan. Thanks, Steve. For driving me and helping him out with this.”

“Eh, worst case scenario I get to be the last person who sees you alive.”

“Steve!” She squealed and laughed.

“Now go on! Get!” He slapped her thigh and unlocked the door. “Go make that freaks dreams come true.” He shot her a wholesome smile before she watched the expensive car shrink to nothing as it drove away.

She looked at the map in her hand after snuggling into the puffer coat that had protected her from a couple of Chicago winters. The flashlight that could double as a weapon was shoved into her bag, barely room left in it as it was. It was near dusk, still plenty of light, and the moon would be bright if the clouds stayed away, she wasn’t entirely concerned about her ability to do this, but she was partially convinced she’d get lost.

Luckily for her, the path was well laid out, as promised. There were intermittent signs when paths forked or connected and although it was far darker sooner under the thick canopy of evergreens she was still managing alright. She noticed the trail stopped right at the water, wondering if she’d end up having to get wet. She wondered if rain boots would’ve been a better choice. As the sky turned into a watercolor painting, it grew colder and she could hear what took her a while to convince herself was music being played up ahead. She figured she was getting close.

Over the small hill, she saw the trees drop off, as she made her way with slower steps, being sure to not breathe so heavily when she finally got to Eddie. The sky came into view, a backdrop of mountains and a skyline that immediately looked familiar. She sidestepped down as the trail ended, the thick trees stopping for sandier earth to break through to a small clearing with a picnic table and a valley view of the far side of the lakes.

Eddie stood in his layers, one of the many scarves Star had made him on but not wrapped around his neck. He swayed as he took his handful of rocks, slipping them across the surface of the water. Star took it in for a moment. The beautiful view, both of the landscape and Eddie letting out small grunts and noises of approval or dissatisfaction at his skipping attempts. She was pulled back to the chilly night in October they'd run from the cops and ended up here. It felt like a lifetime ago now, but it’d only been mere months. A song from the mixtape she made was playing softly from a boom box on the seat of the table. An old camping heat lamp sat on top with a glowing light around it. Blankets covered the seats and tabletop, and another stuffed into the bags under the table. He’d made a cozy little spot for them, one with a fond memory attached. Any annoyance she’d had for having to walk alone was quickly forgotten, being touched by the effort he’d put in.

Eddie spun all the way around with a throwing attempt, stopping himself and stumbling a bit when he saw Star's appearance against the tree line.

“Star! Hey! You made it!” He lit up like a Christmas tree at the sight of her, making her smile go soft, tipped with pinked cheeks from her brisk walk and the nippy air. A few strands of hair fell out around her face, her beanie snug on her head.

“It took a little longer than I expected.” She stated in place as he jogged the short distance toward her to bring her into a hug.

“I figured we’d be here a while don’t worry about it. I was prepared no matter how long you took.” He said supportively, pulling away to have his hands rest on her arms. “Leave it to you to find a way to make comfortable warm clothes cute.” He dropped his fingers to the buttons on her dress, a cream turtleneck under a burnt orange corduroy pinafore paired with layers of thick knit tights. Her black jacket went past her waist, long and sturdy to hold up against the Chicago winter wind. She was perfectly warm and had made many attempts to look cute while doing so.

“I’m not gonna lie, I tried very hard to.” She gave a light laugh as she looked to study him in his layers of knit, leather, and denim. He was wearing long johns under his jeans, she could see the soft material instead of his knobby scarred knees that usually glimpsed through the worn and styled holes.

“You were very successful.” He said with a warm smile, kissing her cheek. His lips were warm, but his nose was cold. “You sure you’re warm in a dress? Let’s get you by the heat.” He took her by the hand to lead her toward the table.

“I’ve got thick tights and then these knit ones over top. Not to mention shorts under the dress.” She lifted the almost knee-length hem to show spandex shorts creating another layer of protection.

“If I wore dresses I think I’d always wear shorts under them. Otherwise, I’d be giving everyone a show for free.” He chuckled and gently directed her to sit on the bench seat, already feeling her face begin to thaw. He hopped to the other side of the table to sit across from her.

“That’s why I wear so many long skirts and keep the short ones for you.”

“And it never goes unappreciated.” He shakes his head, his hair bouncing to frame his broad smile. “I’ve got blankets if you want them too.” He looked under the table and she smiled at his almost nervousness, tending to her.

“I’m okay right now. The lamp is doing the job.” She nodded tightly. “But there is one thing I’d like.”

“What?” He looked with high brows, hands on the table ready to jump when she said.

“I’d rather you sit next to me.” She pushed her chin to her shoulder in a sweet addition to her words.

“Yeah?” He gave a crooked smile as if he were touched by the simple request. “I brought some food I didn’t wanna crowd you.”

“You couldn’t crowd me even if you were inside me, Eddie, c’mere.” She lightly laughed and pat the bench by her. He clumsily threw his long legs over and jumped to her side like an excited puppy.

“It gets a little crowded inside you sometimes.” He joked with a big smile as he slid in next to her, straddling the bench and putting her leg over his to get closer, wrapping his arms around her from the side.

“And whose fault is that?” She scolded playfully, tapping his pink nose. He took her hands into his.

“It’s hard being gods favorite.” He pouted and sent Star into a laugh. She sat and watched as he dutifully tended to her cold hands, rubbing and blowing in cycles. He kissed her bare skin and breathed with a hiss into his hands to warm hers. “You find the place okay?”

“Well enough. I wasn’t the happiest about not knowing where I was going but now that I’m here I get why you didn’t tell me.”

“So you DO remember it?”

“Of course I do, not every day you get to run from the cops.” She nodded to the quickly turning navy sky. “Or that view.”

“I thought it’d be nice to go somewhere where we couldn’t be disturbed. That had some meaning for us.”

“It was very clever. I see why you came before I did. You brought enough stuff you probably broke your back carrying it all you poor thing.” She doted on him, turning to face him more head-on with a leg bent onto the bench. She rubbed his arms and squeezed his lean but strong arms in an attempt to soothe them.

“It wasn’t too bad.” He looked at her hands bashfully, the act of being loved on still something that he wasn’t used to. “I did bring us some food. I figured you’d be hungry after that walk.”

“You thought of everything.” She leaned in and pecked his lips and his lashes fluttered for a moment at the sudden contact.

“Didn’t want you cranky.” He leaned in and teased.

“Me? Cranky? Never.” she raspberries her lips.

“Uh huh sure.” He raise his brows, voice cracking as he sold the insincerity. He leaned down to open the small cooler he’d put bowls into. “I will agree with you only to keep to the terms of the boyfriend contract I agreed to.” He grinned. “Hell yeah, they aren’t cold yet.” He muttered, handing her a plastic butter container that still felt warm to the touch.

“The great mystery of what’s in the leftover butter container.” She chuckled as he pulled out another. She reached down to pop the lid and he put his hand over hers suddenly. Star blinked up confused.

“I tried it and I don’t think it’s bad but if it is you can tell me. If won't hurt my feelings.”

“Yes, it would.” Star teased and Eddie bashfully looked away.

“I would get over. I could use some constructive criticism. From you. Because I love your food. I want to be able to make you food too.” He almost mumbled it, as if he were ashamed.

“I’ll start waiting until you come over to cook. That sound good? You can help me.”

“I’d like that.” He nodded with big sweet cow eyes that watched as he released her hand and she popped the lid to find spaghetti and meatballs. “I didn’t make the meatballs! But I mean I heated them up. They were frozen and I didn’t make the sauce like you do, it’s from a jar but I didn’t burn anything.” He gave a nervous smile.

“Don’t sell yourself short, babe. You gotta start somewhere.” She insisted, plucking a fork from his hand and stabbing into the steamed food. She was starving, and that might’ve factored into how good she thought it was. It wasn’t from scratch like he said but she was touched by the gesture nonetheless. She wiped some sauce off his cheek as he noisily slurped up saucy noodles. “Thank you for making us something. It was very sweet.” She smiled and gave him a soft short kiss. “It’s good too. I was starving. I’ve been too nervous to eat today.”

“Nervous?” He asked with a mouthful of mashed meatballs. “Why?”

“I know we’re gonna talk and I know it’s not like the ‘we need to talk’ sort of talk but it means me having to talk about my feelings and that still makes me as jittery as a virgin on prom night.” She chuckled. “I’m just as inexperienced when it comes to sharing real feelings you know? Talking about things that matter. They mean a lot and it comes with a lot of baggage but I promise I’ve been practicing and thinking about it and writing it all down so I can properly convey the things I want to.” She had a serious face all wide-eyed and severe with the lantern light becoming a harsher source of main light between them. His turn to give her a kiss for comfort.

“It’s just me. If there's anyone you shouldn’t be nervous around it’s me.” He offered with the idea that he wasn’t precisely that for her.

“Just you?” She chuckled, digging through her spaghetti. “Just the one person I care about most in the world. The one person whose opinion I’ll take into consideration over my own. The one person that has the power to make or ruin my life with one word.” She looked amused as she gathered another load of noodles onto the fork. “Just you.” She shook her head meeting his eyes, and a sigh before shoving another fork full into her mouth.

“You mean that?” It hurt her heart to see he even considered that she might be sarcastic about those facts.

“Of course I do Eddie.” Her voice was soft, keeping the conversation just between them even if there was possibly no one around for miles to hear. “I’m taking this whole thing. Us. Very seriously. Even though I act like it doesn’t mean everything to me sometimes for the sake of being funny, it’s always true. That’s why I’m so nervous. Do you have any idea how nerve-wracking it is to find yourself feeling things you didn’t think were real? Or that if they were, that you would certainly never experience? I may have a lot of life experience packed into my 19 years but I don’t have any experience when it comes to things like this.” She kept eating and talking, Eddie subtly smiling at her the entire time as she mumbled and munched, her words and face serious but the red splatters of sauce around her mouth made him find her adorable beyond her words.

“Neither do I.” He offered with a one-sided shrug, another mouthful.

“Are you as scared as I am?”

“More.” He said with a mouthful and it made her laugh.

“That helps”.

“I’m scared all the time.” He admitted.

“I am too.” She nodded. “I can’t believe I thought I could not care and be fearless. I thought I had it, I really did. I was stupid. Well, in denial. Now that I’m feeling my feelings and not ignoring them everything is so much. All the time.”

“It never ends.”

“Constant state of what the hell?” They shared a mutually understanding laugh at themselves.

“Well. I got us some pop for energy. And a couple of beers for bravery if we need them. But I’d rather do this sober, to be honest.”

“I would too.” She nodded quickly. “We can smoke later back at my place. You are staying tonight right?”

“If you want me to.”

“Always assume I do.” She smiled and took another oversized bite.

“I can do that.” He grinned sheepishly and turned his face back to the almost empty container.

“Did you have anything specific in mind? That’s a dumb question of course you do.” She pursed her lips.

“Hey, not a dumb question.” He reached out and put his hand over hers, making her look at his face. “I was going to see where the conversation led us. Did you want to start with something?”

“We never have a hard time rambling do we?” She gave a much more reassuring smile. “We can start with the bad part, the fight. I know we’ve talked about it a little but… we’ve had a lot of time to think so I figured it was worth revisiting.”

“Totally agree.” He sat his container aside, a hollow scrape across the tabletop. “You know I’m sorry. I approached the whole thing wrong. I had an expectation. Which was dumb. I didn’t understand what you were going through. But I thought I did. So I thought if I forced you to see things from my perspective maybe you’d agree. Or that by baring my soul you’d be moved to see that you felt the same way or… something.” His face winced. “I hate to admit how very little thought went into what I said.” He rubbed his nose. “I was scared. I don’t remember half of what I said.”

“ It’s fuzzy when I think about it. Did I hear you right or did I turn it into something else that I thought you were saying?”

“Exactly.” He said with relieved eyes.

“I’m sorry too. As you know.” She muttered in addition. “When you’ve been through things like I have, you do things that don’t make sense to anyone on the outside. Sometimes they don’t make sense to you either but it’s something my brain does because it makes me think it’s keeping me safe. Not saying it back was that for me. If I said it, now logically I know this isn’t true, but if I didn’t say it then it couldn’t hurt me because it wasn’t “real”.” She did air quotations. “It was my way of protecting myself from how much it scared me to feel the way I do about you. If I made it real, then I’d have to figure out all these terrifying emotions you make me feel and deal with them. That’s closer to the real reason anyway. On the surface it was Bobby. That voice in the back of my head told me I’d fuck it up. That I didn’t deserve it. All that. That was my excuse, to live in that version of myself that I knew already. I know how she works. She runs on fear and hides and is stunted and therefore things don’t change and if they don’t change then she can’t be caught off guard or hurt because she knows what’s going to happen. But… people are supposed to change. And I was holding onto someone who was holding me back. And I see that now. I mean I did then too I just didn’t have the balls to believe things could be good for me.” He reached out after scooting closer to her to hold her hands in his.

“I think I weirdly understand what you mean. Where it applies to me, anyway. The staying the same because it’s comforting almost.” She nodded in agreement. “I’ve liked people before, thought I might be falling for them in one way or another but when I’d tell them I’d be met with a no. In whatever form that was. Getting laughed at, patronized, ignored, rejected. I felt so strongly about you, that you… that we were different and that it couldn’t possibly go that way again. That I’d fix you by telling you how I felt or something. That was my ego, I guess.” He rolled his eyes at himself. “Then when you didn’t reciprocate in the way I thought I got defensive. And I’m sorry. For whatever it said that hurt you, I’m sorry.”

“You did hurt me.” She admitted with tight lips. “More than I thought possible.”

“I’ll do everything I can to make it up to you. I can’t keep saying sorry like it fixes everything I know I-“ she put her fingers to his mouth to shush him.

“I do forgive you. We were both wrong. I’m sorry too. I should’ve been more open with you but I was afraid.”

“Me too.” He had sad eyes but a small tight smile. “I mean, I had to forgive you. With the card.” It grew and turned contagious. “I’m but a mortal man. I cannot forgo the rules of the card.” Eddie watched as she hid her face in her hands and laughed.

“It was a last-ditch effort. Did it work?” She laughed, peeking from behind her fingers.

“It did. In more ways than one. The fact that you kept it at all told me a lot.”

“I put it in my bedside table. I didn’t want to lose it. I kept it close the entire time.”

“The fact that you remembered some silly little game that me and Wayne played…” he shook his head and smiled. “The action said more than your words did with that one.”

“Especially since I was precisely lacking in the words department.” She poked fun at herself.

“Except you didn’t!” He perked up and leaned in, taking her hands again. “The songs. Your note was simple. I heard what I needed in the songs. The tape was really what made me realize you loved me. Everything made so much sense.”

“I was hoping it would.” She rubbed her thumbs on his hand. “I feel better prepared now to explain how you make me feel but at the time I used what I knew. Which was music. Something we both love.”

“How long did you spend making that tape?”

“Oh god, days. Hours and days.” She laughed. “I ruined so many tapes trying to make it.”

“It was perfect, by the way. It felt so you.”

“Yeah?” She said shyly. “I put my heart and soul into it. Sweat, blood, tears, the whole thing.”

“I did want to know why you picked some of the songs, some were obvious but others I wanted to see from your perspective. I want to know how your brain works.”

“I can talk about 'em if you want.” She gave a hug of her chin toward him, offering a closed-lip smile.

“C’mere.” He motioned soft her to come closer. He stretched to bring the portable stereo closer. “Sit back and let's dissect your hard work.” He pat his chest and she gave him her back, letting his head crane over her shoulder.

“This is like when you ask me about your dungeon builds.” She smiled, him kissing her temple as she fidgeted with the buttons.

“Show me the method behind your madness, milady.”

“Not as intricate or clever as your builds, that’s for sure.”

“Made this hardened black heart cry.” She felt him shrug and she turned to see his face watching her.

“You’re the softest man I’ve ever known, Eddie there’s no hard black heart in there.” She teased.

“For as mean as I was to you, I disagree.”

“I hurt you, you reacted. At least it was honest. And now we can talk about it. You could’ve held it all in and lied and we’d still be where we were.”

“I like where we’re going now.” She put her arm over his wrapped around her middle.

“I couldn’t fit all the songs you’d played for me on here, but I tried to get the main ones. I had so much to say, ironically enough, that I couldn’t take up space with filler. You know what songs you played for me, you don’t need a reminder.” She clicked down buttons with her non-Eddie petting hand.

“You got the best ones.” He agreed, cheek to her temple. “You got the one that I played the night I realized I was in love with you.” He added softly, gently as if the information might upset her. Instead, she turned in his arms, grip tightening with an unintentional plea in her eyes as they looked up at him.

“Which one?” She whispered.

“It’s always Fleetwood Mac with you isn’t it?” He grinned, a slow rise into deep dimples.

“Has to be Make Lovin Fun.” She giggled a smile to match his in its childish joy. “You remember the night you realized that?”

“Hit me like you hit that guy with your car. Probably harder.” He chuckled.

“It’s funny because…” she opened her mouth to shut it and look away, a blush rising to her cheeks. “That’s the night that I realized it. With you, I mean.”

“You would choose the night I got beat up.” He wrinkled his nose playfully and bit her cheek lightly. “If I got you out of it. Totally worth it.” He smiles into her blushing cheek.

“Stop.” She whispered out a whine of embarrassment. “I don’t know how to respond genuinely to that.” She laughed. “I wanna make fun of you for being so corny but I like it. A lot. It’s very warm and fuzzy and I don’t want you to stop being all gushy about me like that. Ever. It’s the best.”

“Then I won’t.” His voice was light and easy and soothing for her fluttering stomach. “Why that night?” He asked with an uptick in his chin.

“Why was it the night you played that song?”

“I asked you first.” He stuck out his tongue.

“Dammit. Okay.” She acted as if she was annoyed to answer but he only squeezed her tighter. “I felt that connection and that was a lot. Finding you and following my gut. Then feeling so strongly I blacked out at the idea that someone had hurt you. That was also a lot to take in. But…well there’s a song for it, actually”

“One of the songs was about that night?”

“Yeah, the Todd Rundgren one.”

“Saw the light in your eyes.” He muttered as she found it on the cassette. “I thought that one was oddly spot on. Not just for that night but in general. I figured it happened to you like me, where you suddenly had it hit you. And you realize you knew it all along.”

“A feeling hit me oh so strong, about you. Then you gazed up at me and the answer was plain to see. Cause I saw the light in your eyes. Fuckin Todd out here making the best albums in history and a song that sucker-punched me right in the feelings. He said it better than I could.” She pursed her lips at the music playing. “I can still see it. I don’t even have to close my eyes. You all woozy and unfocused, me begging you to look at me and holding you.” Her eyes seemed far away as he watched her. He kissed her cheek lightly to not distract her. “You were lit in a Rembrandt light with the headlights. God, you were beautiful.” She sighed. “I saw your eyes focus on me, you saying my name, the lights bright and making those big doe eyes look impossibly wet and large. You looked at me like I was the only thing you wanted to see at that moment.”

“Cause you were, baby.” He said softly into her hair, nuzzling his nose at her. Remembering how she’d been crying and calling him the same pet name.

“The thought of losing you hit me like my car did Greg. I felt it in my whole body. I was faced with the fear you could’ve been… you know... dead or comatose or something terrible I just…” she took in a sharp breath and he saw her eyes shining in the full moonlight. “I realized I couldn’t live without you.” She looked down, her fingers picking at the cuff of his jacket absent mindlessly. “The way you held my hand in the car, kissed it. Caring about me during all that. It was too much for me. Scared the shit out of me. Even though it was exactly what you should’ve done. I mean, if me loving you was your goal. Which I’m guessing it was.”

“Always has been if we’re being honest.” His smile was oddly smug.

“Even though I told you from the first time you tried to ask me out that it wouldn’t happen?”

“There’s a thin line between stupidity and optimism. I like to think I move between the two seamlessly.” He grinned. “From that night at the party I was hopeless. Even if you were a little mean.”

“You like it when I’m a little mean.” She snickered

“You’re good at it. You haunted me for what felt like months and then you finally appeared and I knew I couldn’t let you slip away again. I didn’t expect all this, to fall in love and be forced into this… growth and learning all this about myself, they’re perks, really”.

“Really shitty perks.”

“But necessary” he laughed

“True.” She nodded. “You said you were okay with being my friend though. Were you really?”

“Like I said, what’s stupid and what’s optimistic? I was willing to be anything to you. If you didn’t change your mind I’d live. I’d have an amazing badass friend out of it and that’s a win too. I never bargained for all this.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t realize it sooner.” He shushed her.

“It’s all turned out exactly how it was meant to.” He reassured her.

“You know. On Maggie May. Eddie May.” She chuckled. “I always thought the bit about you led me away from home, just to save you from being alone was about you.”

“How?” He asks with a snort.

“That you were lonely before I showed up here. That you asked the universe to not be lonely. And that led to the things that brought me right to you. You led me away from home. So you didn’t have to be alone. It all worked out how it was supposed to.”

“I love the way your mind works. I don’t think I tell you that enough.”

“You don’t.” She smiled. “But it’s true. I remember singing it and feeling it and it was like I was talking to you.”

“You DO remember it?” He asked, but shocked

“I remembered from the moment I woke up.” She admitted with a frown. “Sober me wasn’t brave enough to admit it. I cried so much that day.”

“You started acting weird after that. I had a suspicion you remembered.”

“You were right. I was just being a pussy." he planted a long kiss on her temple.

“It led you to be here with me. Tonight. Under a full moon talking about our feelings like two people who know a damn thing.” His voice held laughter. Star gazed up at the moon. It reassured her.

“I don’t know much but I know I love you.” She said willingly. Her voice was calm and sweet as if she’s said it 100 times before.

He turned to face her, his hand a light suggestion to her chin to have her face him.

“Let me hear it again?” His voice was a whisper but his face held back glee.

“I love you.” She said with the same calmness and ease. “I do. I mean it. I wish I’d said it sooner but I can say it more to make up for it now. I’m ready. I want to be able to bare my soul to you. I want to do these things that scare me because it makes me dependent on you. I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life figuring out what that means with you.”

“You really do love me.” a statement not a question.

“So much it scares me. I don’t have an option anymore. I’ve given up control and given myself over to the gods about it. I’m here to simply love you as best I can while we’re here.”

“You want a life with me?“

“You sound like you have a hard time believing it.” her brow creased, head tilted as she looked over his face.

“I am.” his large eyes grew with a sweep of his head.

“Why?”

“Why? Exactly! Why me? I can hardly stand being around myself for too long, the idea that someone would want to be with me forever on purpose is a bit baffling.”

“I’m not you. I don’t see you how you see you. I see you how I see you. And that’s as someone worthy of my devotion.”

“I need to work on that.” he mutters with furrowed brows, looking away from her giving face.

“I think me being honest with you about how I love you will help. Help you love yourself by seeing you how I see you. There are so many moments that have passed where I wanted to say something to you but I didn’t. Like, a compliment. Or having a moment of being overwhelmed with how much I love you. I’m looking forward to being able to tell you these things.”

“I am too. I get so stupid sometimes just watching you. And I’ve wanted to tell you how gorgeous you are.”

“Like when?” She snuggled closer.

“Like the night we came here.” She hummed happily and shook her head up at him as he put his arm back around her, crowding them together.

“That was a fun night.”

“I didn’t have the nerve to tell you then but you were beyond gorgeous that night. Ethereal. Arwen level beautiful.” He gestured broadly and she moved as he did, jostled slightly with his exaggeration.

“Thanks.” She smiled softly. “I enjoyed the dancing. It meant a lot to me.”

“I won’t lie to you, I didn’t.” He chuckled and winced. “BUT because I knew it made you happy I didn’t really mind. But having you mad at me is the worst feeling ever. I had to step up and do something that night. Robin talked me into it.”

“She’s weirdly good at that when she isn’t trying.”

“Right? Sometimes I guess I need someone to kick me in the ass and tell me to stop being such a pussy.” He laughed. “Especially when it came to you.”

“I needed the same.” Star shrugged away his concern. “I remember we had really good sex that night.” She giggled, looking down.

“It’s always really good.” he said leaning into her ear and kissing her cheek again. “But seeing you in lingerie was… attempted murder.”

“Good.” She grinned. “I like it when you’re all gooey and grabby over me like that.”

“Noted.” He promised. “For as good as the sex was and as sexy as you were in lingerie and that nerdy role play we had going on, I think when we were here might’ve been the top of the night for me.”

“Here?” She asked with a tilted head.

“You remember what you said?” He asked with a kind tone, lifting a piece of the blanket on the tabletop. “About all these markings?” She looked for a moment, her fingertips doing just as they had then, and explored the untold love stories adorning the weathered wood.

“I was really in my feelings wasn’t I?” She grinned at her past self. “Talking about romance when it was happening to me right at that moment.” She shook her head, amused at her frightened self. “You were so nice to me about it.” She met his eyes, black and large in the now navy sky reflected in them.

“It hit me. What you said. It was poignant, really. I saw how soft you were for a fraction of a second and I didn’t want to lose her.”

“You don’t have to worry about that now.” She let out a happy sigh, feeling his grip on her hand tighten. “You’re not gonna lose me. I’ll keep trying to be her, that soft girl. Promise. She just scares me a bit sometimes is all.” She let out an amused huff.

“She’s a poet.” He said supportively. “Talking about immortality through love and life after death through being remembered. It was beautiful, Star.” His earnest tone had always cut her down so quickly. She was weak to it, the tenderness of his hard appearance juxtaposed. “I might’ve stolen some of it actually?” He let out a grin with a wrinkled nose and rubbed his thigh nervously before returning his hand to hers.

“Stole it?” She laughed.

“For a song. I’d been sitting on it for a while. I didn’t want the guys giving me shit for writing a love song, you know? But being immortal because of love? That sounds metal as fuck.”

“Do I get to hear it?”

“Sometime.” He nodded. “It needs a lot of work. But there are lots of songs you inspired I’ve been working on. I have a journal too, ya know. It’s not a diary like yours but it’s got my more artistic stuff in it.”

“You wrote songs about me?” Her voice was higher pitched as her eyes gave away how much the gesture touched her.

“Of course I did. Most of my first album is gonna be about you you know.” He grinned and kissed her head.

“Do I get a cut?” She teased.

“I mean if we were married you’d be getting the benefit and money from it anyway.” he spoke with less confidence for his first statement, still a bit squirrelly and shy of saying the idea out loud. The next was far more confident and cocky. “Since it’ll be a platinum record.” He put on a big cheesy grin to hide the desire he had for both things to be true for him. She was soft and silent for a moment, looking over his face and letting out a happy sigh.

“You know?” She paused before meeting his eyes again. “I believe that.” She said with a single nod.

“Believe it?”

“I think you could go platinum.” She said seriously. He laughed and blushed, shoving her away slightly and muttering.

“C’mon Star.” He mumbled and hid behind his hair.

“I mean it.” She said, turning his face back toward her. “You’re special. You’re talented. You’re a hard worker and you’re a good person. If anyone deserves it, it’s you.”

“You… seriously?” She saw the fear and hesitation.

“I wouldn’t lie to you about it. If I thought you weren’t good I’d say so. I couldn’t stand to watch you get heartbroken over it. But you’re really good. I mean you’re just starting, so you’re good for how much experience you have, but you have so much potential. You love the music. It’s not a money and chicks gig for you. I mean I’m sure it doesn’t hurt.” She smirked and he shoved her with his shoulder. “But you have to be a little crazy to make it. You have to love it. And you’re both of those things.” She chuckled. “I felt like I should say that. Since we’re together, you know. I don’t want you to write about me in your autobiography later on and say I didn’t support you.”

He looked like he might cry. One thing Eddie always needed was validation. He’d never admit it. But having someone build him up instead of tearing him down, to offer their support and love was all he ever needed from anyone. For Star to make him feel important and special. Not to mention non jokingly give him hope for his deepest desires and pipe dreams? He felt the prickle of tears.

“You don’t have to-“ he swallowed audibly. “Thank you.” He decided on, meeting her eyes and having her put her hands on his cheeks.

“I mean it, baby.” She whispered. He closed his eyes and a tear fell, a smile kissing her thumbs as she rubbed it away. “I know it means a lot to you. I have big dreams too. Nothing's harder than making a living off your art. We can be delusional together, yeah?”

That’s a hard way to live. You sure you want that?” He rasped out, his hands on her wrists.

“I do.” She nodded and leaned in close. “When you love someone you have to love all of them. And I mean when you really love someone. The kind that makes you feel even crazier than you are and want to believe in your wildest dreams because if something this good can happen to you then why couldn’t everything else you want? The kind of feeling that’ll make you believe in…” she stopped and gulped, feeling her mother in the back of her head as she let it all tumble out unfiltered. The tears warmed her eyes, beginning to match his. She’d promised. “I’m willing to believe in a fairy tale kind of love, a tall tale of a life now, Eddie. That doesn’t mean I’m not still terrified. But if you can promise me that you’ll be just as crazy as I am, to believe in this, in us. that we’ll be insane but we’ll be insane together, then…” she fluttered her lashes feeling warmth in her chest bloom.

She paused and took a deep breath and he lovingly doted on her, letting her take her time. He’d have waited years to hear these words from her and he was giving her the patience to let her do it how she needed.

“In Chicago, I went to see my mentor, a friend of my mom's. She’s a psychic medium and I asked her about the things I was afraid of. About you, and us. Because my cards have been telling me we were made for each other and I felt like you were too good to be true and I couldn’t believe something so picturesque could happen to me. But she told me you were a gift and my mom…” Star let a sob leave her and Eddie kissed the tears on her cheeks as they fell, feeling as caught up as she was. “My mom came through to talk to her and she said you were a gift and that I should believe every sign I'd been shown because it was all true.” She started to cry, shaky breaths as she moved him back to meet his eyes. “And if it’s true then we’re as made for each other as two people can be. And I want it to be true, Eddie. I want you to be it for me. My first and last and everything between. This has to be more than me being young and in love for the first time and being blind to logic or reason. Because I love you so much I don’t think I could handle us being anything less than soulmates.” She cried, she broke and let it out, a release that had been building for months.

He cried with her, grabbed her up, and kissed her hard. She stuttered and shook, lips trembling as they fought to kiss him back. When they failed to grip his back, she spoke with the rest of her body. She pulled his neck down as he kissed her cheeks. She moved to sit in his lap, legs to either side of his as they held each other. He kissed her tears away, everyone that had slipped past the guard of his mouth and trailed down her jaw and throat he caught each salty fear as it was released and took it away from her. He held her as she was, so brave and bold to confess her deepest wants and fears to him. He let her cry and snuggle, whimpering into his neck as she regulated herself, having gotten swept away and raw with emotion. Her breathing settled, a rise and fall with the occasional stutter, his lips to her ear as she’d sank into him, a warm hand to her head and his arm around her body to keep her close and comfort her.

“I want those things to be true more than anything.” He whispered, pressing a kiss to the shell of her ear. “We both love fantasy, right? But we love it because it’s about lives we can’t live. People like us don’t get those fairy tale lives, do we? But there you were. Thrust into my arms from the moment I saw you. And I've never wanted you out of them for a second since. And I don’t ever want you to not be in them. If you… someone as brave and strong and cynical as you can believe we’re special, that we’re really some cosmic pairing then, baby I’ll believe it too. With every part of this jaded, cynical, black heart of mine I promise you I’ll be just as crazy as you.” As he spoke she raised, face warm from his hair and neck and now his hands as they wiped away the last of her tears. She returned the favor, soft small kisses to his temples and cheeks as he spoke softly but full of conviction. He rasped and whispered, fighting the urge to be overtaken with emotion. He wanted to be strong for her.

“I love you so much.” An angel sighing out a love spell couldn’t have sounded more perfect to his love-starved heart. With closed eyes from her kisses landing on his lids, he kept them shut to bask in the glow of it. She kissed his forehead and his cheeks. “I’m sorry it took me so long. I’m sorry… to you and myself that I was so afraid of it. It’s still scary, loving you this much. It feels like my chest might explode when I think about it too much. Like there’s so much love there my body can’t contain it. It had to be this way so I couldn’t deny it I suppose. But I love you. So much.” She kissed his lips and felt him smile.

“Say it again, sweetheart.” He then felt her return the smile.

“I love you.” She kissed him again and he groaned. “I love you, Eddie. You and only you.”

“I love you.” He smiled and kissed her back. “I love you so much it makes me crazy, baby.” He overtook her in his arms, tightening around her like she might get pulled away. His hand held her head, keeping their lips from parting as anything except becoming one singular entity wasn’t acceptable.

“I’m.” She spoke between overtaking of her lips by his. “Sorry.”

“You don’t have to apologize, it’s okay.” He whispered am into her mouth.

“I feel like I have so much to tell you. I'm sorry is just one of a million things.”

“That’s why we’re here.” He put his forehead to hers. “I'm all ears.” He promised. “And all yours.” He saw a smile grow and overtake her whole face, turning into a girlish giggle as she hid her face away from him, the heat in her cheeks visible and vulnerable. “You’re the cutest thing I've ever seen. You know that?”

“Eddie.” She whined and his her face into his neck.

“Get used to it baby, you’ve got a lifetime of dealing with me telling you these things now.”

“I won’t.” She kissed his head. “But I’ll try to not let it make me all embarrassed.”

“You’re adorable when you’re embarrassed.”

“You’re so sweet.” She huffed it out like she couldn’t believe him.

“Something about you makes me want to be.”

“I’ve never felt like this before.” She giggled again. “You make me want to run away and hide but in a good way?”

“I don’t know what the hell I'm doing.” He gave her a big grin and it made her smile before she planted another kiss on him.

“Me either.” She shrugged.

“We can figure it out together.” He nuzzled his nose to hers. She sighed into him, letting her body go slack except for the muscles it took to kiss him back. “According to you we’re immortal so there’s no rush to figure it all out tonight.“

“Did I make us vampires in a session and forgot?” She giggled.

“No.” He said softly, “It’s a big reason I brought you here.” He moved to pull back a corner of the blanket on the table. “You were talking about love living on through the carvings on here that night. And I saw a spark of romance and hope in you I hadn’t before. Maybe it was from running from the cops or how beautiful you looked with the moon lighting you, but I got to thinking while I sat here by myself and I thought, you know what I want? Her. I want her forever. The idea of being immortal through time travel because of our love was one, metal as hell but also something that felt like such a pipe dream that I had to take the leap.”He scoots them down, pointing to an EM + SR on the table. She could tell it wasn’t fresh as she touched it. The winter months having worn the etching down.

“You did this back in October?”

“I knew I loved you even before then.” She swallowed audibly. “I thought why the hell not take a chance? Carve this here so I could show you again someday. Or just be a testament of my love for you for someone else to think about. Make it real just for a little while, like you said.”

“I think I love you is going to be the new I'm sorry for me because it’s all I know to say.” She confessed quietly, clearly touched by the gesture. “You’re such a goober but then you do shit like this and I’m floored. You keep people at a distance and they don’t get to see this depth and I’m so excited to get to know this man better. This bold man who declares his love with knives and a story when it wasn’t supposed to be spoken yet. You are ahead of your time Eddie Munson. I’m playing catch up to how brilliant you are.”

“The way you talk about me makes me want to believe everything you say about me.”

“Good. I’m not going to stop until you love yourself as much as I Love you.”

“I’ll work on it.” He promises with a small nod.

“I know you will.” She kissed his cheek and wrapped herself around him again.

A feeling of their compatibility being on show through a comfortable silence made them both lose the tension they’d held for the intense emotions they’d marathoned. They sat and looked out at the lake, music soft and filling the voids between conversations. Everything felt calm like the surface of the lake. Their future felt bright like the moon and both warm and cuddled together despite the cold that surrounded them. Once a yawn escaped Star, Eddie suggested they pack up and head back home.

He had an efficient system, everything fitting in or on the backpacks. The lamp was held by Eddie who held Star's hand and pretended to be wandering through a dangerous forest filled with monsters. He used a mix of a goofy voice and his DM voice, both of which Star was a fan of for different reasons. He made her laugh and he hopes the creatures in the woods appreciated the bubbly sound as much as he did. It wasn’t hard to pretend to be in another world that night for him. The whole thing felt supernatural. The way she played along, scurrying up to him and gasping dramatically when he acted as if he’d heard something. Then going on to squeal and scream through the paths as he jumped and grabbed at her sides, a cue for her to act scared. It passed the time quickly, both out of breath from not only exertion as they threw everything into the back of the van. She insisted they listen to some of his music, claiming he needed some balance. Listening to her stuff over and over would make it less special, even though Eddie disagreed, he popped in the first tape that’d been in his holder between the bucket seats of his van surrounded by crumbled notebook pages. She said they could listen to her tape again when they got back to her place. For now, they could cut the intensity of their conversations and simply enjoy the night be two stupid kids in love for a brief moment.

Part 24

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anaisweird · 2 years

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Can somebody make a fic with Eddie based off this Lana song or recommend one based off of it :( !!!

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babybluebex · 1 year

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looking | joseph quinn x reader

summary: joe catches you looking and rewards (punishes?) you for your efforts pairing: joseph quinn x fem!reader (rpf - don't like, don't read) tags: smut (MINORS DNI), squirting, oral (m! and f!receiving), mostly dom!joe but surprise sub!joe at the end, praise kink, no condom, creampie, cockwarming author's note: yes i have a lecture this morning. yes i am writing this at work. no i will not apologize. enjoy <3 // follow @babybluebex-writes to be notified whenever i post a new story! (also big ole thanks to @freckledjoes for making this gif for me!! thanks a bunch!)

You heard his feet on the landing of the stairs, and then gentle padding as his bare feet sounded on the carpeted hallway as he made his way to the bedroom. These nights were your favorite— Joseph had made you dinner, cheesy pasta with garlic bread, then you had watched an episode of Succession before getting ready for bed. You could tell that Joe was in a sort of mood that night, the kind of mood where he lit a candle at dinner and kissed you and put on Al Green on his record player. He had asked if you wanted to join him in the shower, but you had declined; you had work in the morning, and a randy shower didn't exactly entail an early sleep.

But then, he rounded the corner and darkened the doorway, and you gulped. He looked good; wet curls on his forehead, singlet covering his beefy build, and those underwear, clinging to every curve just right. And he didn't even seem like he knew what he was doing. Joe rubbed his hair dry on his towel as he came into the bedroom, and he went to his dresser, rooting through the top drawer for some pajama bottoms. The silence was deafening, and damning, because Joe turned to you with an amused look on his face.

"What's wrong, love?" he asked. "Cat got your tongue?" He added a dramatic pout to his plush lips, and, fuck, you just had to kiss him.

"You just look really good," you said softly. "Can't I just look at you?"

"Oh, you want to look?" Joe asked teasingly. Oh. So he was in that sort of mood. "I thought it was rude to stare."

"I'm not staring," you told him. "I'm... Appreciating. Admiring."

"Admiring, eh?" Joe laughed. "What exactly are you admiring?"

"Well..." you started, holding out your hand and tracing the shape of his body in the air. He was certified grade A beef that day, finally having regained the weight he had lost to play Eddie, and you loved his plush hips and thick thighs. "And..." You made a cupping motion with your hand, and Joe let out a sputtered laugh.

"So you're staring at my dick," Joe said, shaking his head mirthfully. "I knew I was nothing but a piece of meat to you."

"No!" you exclaimed. Even though you knew he was joking, you didn't want him to think you were doing that for even a second. "I'm just... You just... Y'know? Just admiring every part of you."

"You're drooling," Joe cajoled. He hung his towel on the back of the door and made his way to the bed, and you watched as he grew closer, finally until he was lingering right next to you, his cloth-covered dick inches from your face. God, he smelled so good, you just wanted to take him then and there.

You leaned forward and placed a kiss on his bulge, looking up at him through your eyelashes to see his reaction, and you were overjoyed to see him slowly close his eyes and take a deep breath. "You gonna suck it or what?" he asked in a low voice, and the hot pressure of need slammed inside you belly. You loved when he got like this.

You readjusted yourself in bed, sitting on your knees to reach him properly, and you tugged him forward by his hips to get him closer. Carefully, you pulled down those black briefs, and his half-hard cock spilled forward. He was thick and heavy, beautiful, and you chuckled lightly at the sight before you. "You trimmed," you giggled, and Joe peeked his eyes open.

"Is that a crime?" he asked, and you slid your hands up his thighs, lightly dragging your nails up.

"No," you said. "I just like your bush."

Joe shrugged. "I'll grow it back out," he said. His hand smoothed your hair back, gathering it all up in a loose grip before he flattened his palm against the back of your head, pulling you towards him. You put an end to your games then, taking the head of his uncut cock into your mouth, lightly sucking, just enough to give him a little bit of pressure. Joe made a quiet noise, a sort of hum of appreciation, and you took him further into your mouth. He tasted good, musky but clean, and you moaned around him as your tongue lavished the thick vein that ran along the bottom of his cock.

"That's it," Joe whispered. "What a good girl... You love sucking my cock, don't you?"

You fluttered your eyelashes at him as an answer and took him deeper, then pulled back and suckled at his head for a moment, just to get a reaction out of him. His hand gripped your hair as he moaned, and he gritted his teeth. "Fuck," he whispered. "I knew you liked what you saw."

You pulled off of him with a gasping breath, letting your hand stroke him from balls to tip. "Did you do it on purpose?" you asked.

"Do what?"

"Dress like this," you asked. "Look so goddamn delicious. You know I can hardly resist you."

"That was the plan," Joe admitted. His stomach flexed when you reached up to cup his balls, and you leaned back in, sucking him down again. You didn't usually like giving blowjobs— you hardly ever went down on past boyfriends— but there was something special about Joe that made you want to swallow down his cock every single day, no matter what. "God, you look so hot like this, darling. Love watching you like this."

You moaned softly, then broke away from him, panting to try to regain the breath that sucking him off has made you lose. Joe didn't hesitate to lean down and kiss you, holding your face as his tongue swirled in your mouth, tasting himself off of you. You scrambled backwards to lay on your back, and you tugged Joe in by his shirt, urging him to lay on top of you. He did exactly as you expected, following you and nudging your legs open as he messily kissed you, and he broke the kiss to look down at you. Panties and a t-shirt (his t-shirt), nothing else.

"Fuck," Joe whispered, and he chuckled. His eyes were stuck on your covered pussy, and he wet his lips with the tip of his tongue when he spotted the damp patch on your panties. "Is this all for me?"

"Yeah," you told him. "F'course it is."

"Jesus, I'm a spoiled man," Joe whispered, kissing you deeply again. His hands scrambled to tug down your panties and expose you to him, and his greedy eyes watched as you opened your legs for him, showing him your wet pussy. Your blood was thrumming in every vein with desire, you needed him so badly, and he flicked his eyes up to yours, those lips of his falling open gently. He kissed you once more, then leaned down to kiss your neck, nibbling softly at your skin before trailing his kisses downwards. Ever downwards he ventured, until his warm breath was fanning across your cunt, and he did not waste any time before he licked at you.

The stubble on his chin and cheeks roughed up your thighs as he ate you out like he had never learned how to do anything else. He sucked at your quivering clit and made you cry out in pleasure, his tongue danced on your hole, he even added his fingers to help open you up. By the time the knot in your belly was straining, he was sucking lewdly and shaking his head, making sure that you felt every inch of his fingers and tongue on you. It was so good, it felt so fucking amazing, and you let the knot snap and come undone. You grabbed hard at Joe's hair and almost cried as you came on his fingers; it just felt so fucking good.

"Jesus!" Joe laughed, and you panted as you looked down at him. Something wet was in his beard, and you laughed when you realized that it wasn't just your regular juices. "Good fucking girl, do that again, baby."

"I-I didn't even know I could do that," you laughed breathlessly, letting your head fall back. Joe wasted no time in pushing his fingers back into you, thrusting hard into you and making your toes curl with the sensitivity, and you yelped when the sudden knot burst again, and you were able to watch this time as you squirted quickly on Joe's face. He seemed to love it, smiling up at you and panting, and he pulled out his soaked fingers. He looked at them in awe, wet and glistening, before he touched them to his lips, licking them clean.

You leaned up and stripped off your shirt, and you reached out for him, pulling his hips between your legs again as you shoved his singlet over his head. You discarded it across the room before you kissed him again, tasting yourself on his tongue, and he didn't wait a single second before he grasped his cock and pushed inside you. You were so fucking sensitive from cumming so hard, and you grabbed hard at his shoulders as he instantly started up a pace. He was quick, thrusting messily into you and holding down your hips to keep you where he wanted you, and you hid yourself in his neck. Jesus, he was insatiable tonight; he had made you fucking squirt, and now he was fucking you so hard that you were worried you two might break the bed.

"Baby," you whispered in his ear. "Easy, honey, we have all night."

"I almost came when you squirted," Joe told you. "Fuck me, I'm so close already. Let me cum, and then we can go slower and nicer, but, right now, I need to— Fuck!"

His cock throbbed inside you as he fucked you, and you knew that he was right. He was dangerously close to his release, and you to yours, and you could have sworn that you heard him whimper when you clenched down on him, tightening around his cock.

"Please, baby," Joe whispered. "Let me cum inside you, please, fuck, I need it."

"Fuck, yeah," you breathed. "Cum inside me, please."

Joe's nails dug into the flesh of your hip, and you gasped as Joe moaned deeply, and he filled you. You could feel it inside you, so much thick cum— your poor boy really needed to cum. He moaned in your ear and panted heavily as he tried to catch his breath, and you pulled yourself from his neck to smile hazily up at him. "Was it good?" Joe asked, and you chuckled, brushing back his curls.

"Yes, my love," you told him. "So good. I didn't know I could squirt, that was interesting."

"A surprise, for sure," Joe laughed. "But it was hot. Can you do it again?"

"I don't know how I did it the first time," you chuckled. "I don't know if I can do it again."

Joe huffed out a laugh, and he leaned up on his elbows, rocking his hips into you again. Your nerves were so scorched and sensitive that you instantly let out a yelp, and Joe said, "Well, let's see."

#joseph quinn #joe quinn #joseph quinn x reader #joe quinn x reader #joseph quinn smut #joe quinn smut

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jksprincess10 · 2 months

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Storm || Eric x reader

A/N: I fear I'm back in my Joe Quinn phase after watching a quiet place day one, don't look at me.

Summary: There's a thunderstorm and you can finally make noise.

CW: fluff, smut, eric is kinda shy and soft, reader has a bush, pre-established relationship implied, oral sex (f receiving), fingering, eric loves eating pussy, protected p in v, reader is a tad more dominant, minimal editing.

(1.3k words)

divider by @saradika-graphics

There is only one way to make love when any sound could lead to death: silently.

But when the outside is louder, when thunder tears the sky apart, when rain pitter-patters loudly against the asphalt, you can be as loud as you want.

In the darkness of your apartment, the first flash of thunder and the trickle of the rain provokes immediate joy. He knows too, his usually big, innocent eyes veiled by lust. Like Pavlov’s dog, Eric knows how to react when the outside sounds get louder and louder.

“Yes.” You immediately confirm what you want, and he gives in to you.

You wrap your hands around his neck as he brings you into a soaring kiss that makes you moan against his plush lips. You feel like you’re outside in the rain, drowning. Your fingers trail down his neck until you come across his first buttons, that you undo expertly, along with tossing aside his ridiculous tie. Despite everything, Eric still insisted on dressing like the lawyer student he once was.

Under the soft candlelight, you discover his pale skin, his soft body like it’s the first time. He takes care of your sweater, pulling it over your head.

“You’re beautiful.” You whisper, out of habit.

“Stop.” Eric reacts, his voice under the flow of his British accent. “You are.”

His arms are around your waist, pulling you close as he nuzzles your breasts that you hadn’t bothered covering up with a bra (who cares it’s the fucking end of the world, right?). The tip of his tongue shyly teases the tip of a hard nipple. Too used of being gentle, quiet.

“More, please.” You beg softly.

He sucks the flesh into his warm mouth, and your body arches against his chest, pushing your ass into his careful hands. Eric’s right hand come up to your other breast, caressing and squeezing the fat until you’re letting out pretty moans for him.

Your hands come down to his leather belt, that you’re soon discarding on the floor with a loud metal clank. But you don’t care, as the thunder is already responding even louder. You’re both taking each other’s pants off embarrassingly fast, and he’s pushing you on your couch until you’re splayed out for him, a beautiful painting under a warm glow, occasional cold light revealing more. His nose traces your covered mound, inhaling the soft laundry scent of your floral panties.

The rain is still pouring, taping violently against your apartment windows as he pulls down your panties, freeing the dark curls and the wetness of your slit.

“You never told me if it bothered you –”

“What? This?” He’s asking as a finger curls around some of the untamed hair. His tone is almost mocking, and you feel your cheeks heating up.

“Yes.”

“I quite like it, actually. You look like a woman. And this is what I want. ” He punctuates his words with an index trailing over your slit, making you shudder. Your fingers tangle in his unruly, soft brown curls, pushing him closer to where you want him. You know he can never resist eating pussy, it’s probably his favorite meal. He spreads your lips with his fingers, keeping you open for him as his pink tongue lays flat against your slit, caressing and experimenting.

As the thunder growls, you remember you can show him your appreciation freely. Your mouth hangs open, and as his plush lips latch around your clit, you moan his name. And it’s the most beautiful song he has ever heard.

“You’re always so good to me, Eric.” You praise him softly, the tips of his ears reddening when you compliment him.

Eric sucks even harder before letting go to caress all of you with the flat of his tongue. Your ass lifts off the couch without really wanting too, pushing more of you into his mouth. He licks and sucks messily, wet sounds filling the air. You like him like this, free and disheveled. One of his fingers breach your hole, stretching you slowly. You want to tell him you won’t break, but you don’t know how, your mind blurry with pleasure.

A strangled “more” is all you can let out, and he listens, pushing another finger in. He thrusts them almost all the way out, then in, curling them at the right angle as his numb tongue keeps sucking. You fall apart just in time for the next thunder crack, a cry coming out of your throat as you gush around Eric’s fingers. His lips are wet with your juices as he comes up for air, climbing on the couch to kiss you. Your fingers tangle in his hair, pulling him on top of you as you lay down.

“Make love to me.” You whisper against his lips, your hands trailing down his body to take off his boxer briefs. Your hand circles the base, teasing his cock with a slow movement of up-and-down, momentarily distracting you from your wish.

“Don’t you want me to make love to you?” He whispers in your hair in an amused tone.

“Yes. But I like this. I like touching you.”

Eric chuckles and pushes your hand away. “Stop. I want you.”

He gets up momentarily to get a condom and covers his cock with it, pumping himself as he gazes down at the perfection that you are, laid peacefully on the couch. You rarely look as relaxed, and he cherishes those moments when you’re not fearing for your life.

You beckon him closer with a movement of your fingers, and he lays on top of you. He’s always so careful with you.

“Hold me.” You wrap your legs around his middle and push him closer. His arms wrap around your neck as he fills you up, slowly, inch by inch. Your eyes flutter closed; you can barely see the violent lightning anymore; you can only hear it. But you try to concentrate on Eric’s heavy breathing in your ear. He stops when his hips are flush with yours, just holding you peacefully.

“I love you.”

You don’t know if you’ll live to see another day, but you love him and it’s the only certainty.

“I love you, too.” He kisses your brow, your nose, and your lips. You keep him there, your tongue tangling with his as he starts moving gently. Your moans die in his mouth, and you realize how much you crave him, harder, faster. You push him off you and he looks at you with concern until climb on top of him.

“You won’t break me. Fuck me like you mean it. Fuck me like it’s our last day alive.”

You align him with your pussy, and you sink down. His reprieve is short, as you’re already bouncing on top of him. He moans obscenities, covered by the sound of the rain. His hands wrap tightly around your hips and his thrusts meet yours in a chaotic, unsynchronized dance that you both make work. The two of you are letting out cries freely, and it’s somehow liberating.

“Come for me, Eric.” You let out between strangled moans.

He slows down, thrusting harder and deeper.

“Not before you, love. Touch yourself.”

You anchor yourself to the couch with a hand on the leather underneath your bodies, your free hand coming down to play with your clit. You try not to fall as he keeps fucking up into you, in a slow but rough pace.

“That’s it baby. God, you’re so hot.” He says it like it’s physically hurting him.

With another one of his deep thrusts, your walls tighten around him and you come with a final moan. You then let him use you, until he’s also done. Your body falls on top of his, and you caress his sweaty curls as he whispers sweet nothings to you.

You love storms.

#eric a quiet place day one #eric aqpdo #eric aqpd x reader #eric a quiet place x reader #eric a quiet place x you #joseph quinn #joseph quinn x reader #joseph quinn x you #eric aqpdo smut

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joequinnisgod · 1 year

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Caught in the act

Pairing: Joseph Quinn x f!reader

Summary: You wake up from a wet dream, but Joe’s asleep, so you have to take care of yourself. You end up in the shower, where he catches you in the act.

Warnings: smut, f!masturbation, shower sex, squirting

Word count: 2k

Your eyes slowly opened at the buzzing sound of your phone, tearing you from your dreamland. To not wake Joseph, you quickly reached for your phone and turned off the alarm.

After rolling on your back, you noticed something unpleasant that made you frown. You were all sweaty and a particular dull ache sat between your thighs. Pictures from the dream you were living in just a few moments ago started flooding your mind. After you opened your eyes again letting them adjust to the bright room, you turned your head to the side. Joseph was sound asleep. His eyelashes stroking his face, his lips all puffy and slightly open as soft snores escaped his throat every now and then. He had a long, busy day the previous day and he got home quite late so you didn’t want to wake him.

With your eyes closed, you started re-living your dream. Your fingers traced your skin all the way down to your panties and slipped them under the thin, soft fabric. With two fingers of yours you started gathering the wetness and spreading it around before you started playing with your clit. Not having the patience to tease yourself, after a few slow circles your fingers began picking up the pace. Your free hand made its way to beneath your shirt and you started massaging one of your boobs and playing with your nipple.

Soon, you had to realise it wasn't enough. You were used to Joe's heavenly, skilled tongue and fingers and the feeling wasn't the same at all. Suddenly you remembered the pastel pink vibrator you had in your top drawer, purchased a few years ago. You enthusiastically reached for the handle of the drawer, only to meet the sad reality again. The batteries in it died a few weeks ago and each time you visited the grocery store, you forgot to get new ones.

A heavy sigh fell from your lips as frustration started to get under your skin. After not being able to come up with any ideas, you decided to just start your day. Glancing at Joe, you saw him still laying there, deep asleep. You walked to the en suite bathroom and washed your face before brushing your teeth. Still feeling sticky and sweaty from your sleep, you decided to take a shower.

You opened the glass door of the walk-in shower and opened the tap. After stripping out of your pyjamas quickly, you walked underneath the big, fixed shower head and enjoyed the hot water pouring down your chest. You stood there for a few minutes, just getting mentally ready for the day but your with your excitement not quieting down, it was a little hard. As your eyes wandered across the water droplets on the wall tiles, your gaze stilled on something. The handheld shower head.

"Back to the good old way." You murmured to yourself after a few seconds of thinking about it as your hand reached for it. You opened the tap for the detachable shower head, adjusting the temperature and pressure of the water. Not knowing any better, you sat down on the floor of the shower, with your back against the wall and your legs spread wide, and aimed the shower head towards your pulsing core. A loud gasp erupted from your throat, already starting to feel a little relieved.

"Oh, yes." You moaned quietly and carefully, not to wake Joseph. Your free hand went to your boob again, as your mind wandered back to the same place.

His lingering touches, his hot kisses, his burning, sweaty skin, his thick, heavy moans, his deep voice...

"You take me so well, baby."

The way his hips slammed into you, along with the unholy sounds filling the bathroom of a fancy place where a long forgotten award show was held.

"Joey, please..don't stop."

"I'm not planning on it, princess. I'm gonna make you cum so hard.. – he said between heavy breaths – the whole building will know what we were doing in here. And they're gonna be so..fuck...so jealous of us."

You looked at the both of you in the mirror. The way his eyebrows furrowed in pleasure and concentration while looking at where you connected, then to your reflection was almost enough to make you come undone right away.

"Look at you, baby. Such a pretty thing. Being such a little slut..only for me."

"Only for you, oh." You squeezed his hand. "Joey, I'm so close." You panted.

"C'mon baby, cum for me. I wanna feel you fall apart around me. Show me how naughty you can be for daddy."

"Oh, Joey, fuck."

"Having fun there?" His voice startled you, making you jump and drop the shower head.

"Fuck..are you kidding me? I was so close.." You whimpered in between heavy breaths as a teardrop full of frustration rolled down you cheek as you reached for the dropped head.

"Oh, I'm so sorry, doll." He pushed his boxers down as he made his way towards the shower.

"No, you're not."

"No, I'm not." He flashed a cheeky grin as he closed the door behind himself.

Just when you thought your problem was finally to be solved, he started spreading the body wash on his chest and stomach, actually taking a shower.

"What are you doing?" You looked him up and down.

"Taking a shower." He gave you a confused, teasing look. "You know..that's what people usually do in here."

"Fuck off." You aimed the shower head at him.

"C'mon, love." He reached his arm towards you to help you up from the floor. "What got my baby so frustrated and whiny?"

"You." You muttered as he wrapped his arms around you.

"Me?" His eyebrows ran up his forehead.

"Yeah."

"What did I do?" He chuckled.

"I had this dream about you. About us."

"Hmm..really? What were we doing?"

"You were doing me, Joe. So well.."

"And that's why you're whining?"

"No..it's because you weren't awake when I woke up, so I had to take care of myself. But that wasn't enough, and the batteries in my vibrator have been dead for weeks now and I aways forget to get new ones, and now you interrupted me right when I was about to cum."

"Oh, my poor baby. What do I do with you now? Hm?"

"Make me cum, Joey, please."

"Fuck..how could I say no when you're asking me so nicely? And how do you want me to do that?" His hand travelled down the curve of your back and caressed your ass before grabbing it firmly, making you moan softly.

"I don't care, just make me cum. Fast, cause we're both gonna be late."

"Okay, I have a photoshoot, but where are you going?"

"I'm going out to have late breakfast with your mum."

"I thought that was tomorrow."

"No, it's today, but please do something with me now. What will I tell your mum when I'm gonna be late? Sorry I'm late, I was busy 'cause your son was fucking me senseless?"

He pressed his lips to yours in a heartbeat to shut you up.

"Jump." He murmured as he tapped the back of your thighs.

You wrapped your arms around his neck and your legs around his lower back, making your aching core touch his hard cock. A gasp left your mouths as he stepped to the wall you previously sat against and pushed you up against it. A small hiss left your lips because of the cold walls, giving Joseph the chance to slip his tongue into your mouth. You took your hand from the back of his neck and traced it down from his chest to his angry length. You started tracing the veins with your fingertips to rile him up even more before wrapping your hand around it and slowly starting to pump him up and down.

"Fuck..I'm not gonna last if you do that." He swallowed thickly.

You lined him up with your entrance and moaned out loudly as he started to push inside you, filling you up. Your hand went back to his head, tugging on his curls.

"Fuuck.." A breathy, deep moan fell from his lips. You couldn't help but clench around him, making his breath hitch in his throat. "What..what happened in your dream?"

"We were in the bath- oh..in the bathroom..during an award show and..we couldn't wait 'till we got home, so..so we did it in the bathroom...in front of the mirror."

"Shit..we can do it in front of the mirror."

"And we will when we get home..but don't you dare stop now."

"Anything you want, my love." He took a hand from under your thigh and caressed your hot skin from your leg to your breast at first. He gently massaged it, making your eyes close and your head tilt back against the wall. His hand then came up to your throat and his fingers were wrapped around it in a second, squeezing the sides of it gently.

"Joey, I'm gonna.."

"You gonna cum already? I haven’t even been inside you for five minutes. My poor angel, so worked up, so needy, huh? Look at me, baby." When he didn’t get any reaction from you, he let let go of your throat and cupped your cheek. "You with me? I wanna see those pretty eyes."

You were so lost in the feeling of his cock so deliciously deep inside you and his scent filling your nose, that you didn’t even notice him stilling his hips at first.

"No, no, no! Why’d you stop?" You opened your eyes and looked at him with an upset look on your face.

"I said look at me. Keep your eyes open for me, doll. Can you do that for me?" His thumb stroked your cheek lovingly, yet somehow still in a mean, teasing manner. His lips came close to your ear as his voice got quiet and low. "Can you do that for daddy?" He started moving his hips again.

"Oh, fuck. I’m so close Joey.."

"Cum for me, baby. C'mon..soak daddy's cock."

Your hand went to your clit, circling it fast and impatiently. The feeling of Joseph’s hand leaving your cheek to wrap itself around your throat again was only fuel to the flame. Your back arched off the cold, wet tiles and your eyes rolled to the back of your head as your frequent, sinful moans bounced off the walls. At the same time you felt his hand choke you harder and suddenly everything became so overwhelming. For the first time in your life you felt liquid gush out of you, right around his cock.

"Thaat's it baby. Good girl..oh, fuckfuckfuck."

You felt Joe's hot seed spill inside you, making your orgasm even more intense. He drove his hips into you at a fast pace, making sure to get the most out of your orgasms. His thrusts slowed down at the end after he rode out his high as well, until he didn’t stop completely.

"Fuck..that was so good" You whispered as you pressed soft kisses along the side of his neck, gently sucking on the skin.

"You fucking squirted." A proud smile sat on his face.

"I’m not surprised..I’ve been edged three times this morning." You whimpered to him before pressing a kiss to his lips.

"I love you." He murmured into the kiss.

"I love you." A content smile spread on your face.

"I really gotta get something we can sit on in here."

"I'm not against it..I had to sit on the fucking floor."

"God..every time I'm gonna look at the shower head, that's the only thing I'm gonna think of." You chuckled as you shared a few more kisses.

"When'd you brush your teeth?"

"When you were a little too busy. It was the hottest thing I've ever seen." He pressed kisses down your chest.

"So you were watching me like a fucking perv?"

"Mm-hmm...can I have that view again when I brush my teeth tonight?"

You slapped his arm as he let you down onto the floor, sighs leaving your lips as he pulled out of you. His hands grabbed your ass again as he pulled you close to kiss you one more time, before starting your actual shower.

Thank you for reading, hope you enjoyed it! Have a beautiful day / night!! <3

#joseph quinn #joe quinn #joseph quinn smut #joseph quinn x reader #joseph quinn imagine #joseph quinn x you #joseph x reader #joseph quinn fanfiction #joseph quinn rpf #joe quinn smut #joe quinn x you #joe quinn x reader #joe quinn rpf #joequinnisgod

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harringtons-cupid · 2 years

Text

Happy 29th birthday Joseph Quinn x Fem! Reader

➻Wc: 2.1k

➻Warnings 18:

Very Smutty: Cunnilingus, fingering, clit spanking, ass spanking, skin grabbing, biting, scratching, nail digging, nipple sucking, creampies (pls use protection!), daddy kink, squirting, neck sucking. Brief car sex, making out, alcohol use. Slight fluff

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You had bought a new red dress, he always said he liked you in red. You were feeling confident as the day rolled along.

His agent helped you with the plane tickets, the hotel and the other finicky details. All you needed to do was get Joe in the car.

He was lying naked on your bed, gazing at you with those beautiful brown eyes. His hands were grabbing every bit of skin, pulling you right onto his hard throbbing cock.

His hands roughly rubbing your clit, making you gasp and whimper at the sensation. Your legs were positioned either side of him on the bed, his cock was grinding between your folds and teasing your entrance.

You moaned into his mouth as he kissed you, your clit twitching as he slapped it hard. Feeling it pulsate against his skin, his tip edging further and further inside you. Your cunt clenching with every movement of your clit, your nails digging into his skin.

“Fuck baby, I’m going to try to not move until your cunt is dripping wet and begging to be fucked” he growled into your ear.

Making you whimper at his words, biting your lip as he flicked your clit. Feeling it grow wetter and wetter with every movement, his cock twitching inside you.

He brought your nipples closer to his mouth and sucked aggressively on them, feeling you move slowly on his cock from the intense pressure. His fingers still playing with your clit as you rocked back and forth.

“Joe, it feels so good” you whimpered, moving quicker with each moan.

Your cunt was dripping around his cock, pulsating and needing to move. Your nails scratched his chest as he gripped hard onto your hips and slammed your cunt down on his cock.

Listening to you groan as his tip hit into your sweet spot that was feeding your insatiable hunger to be fucked.

He held you down as he began to slam hard into your cunt, the wet sounds flooded his ears. Your clit twitched from the on and off attention it got from being slammed down onto his pelvic bone with every thrust.

Edging you closer and closer to your orgasm, your body shaking, your breath hitched as he gazed at you. Seeing you in such pleasure was the best birthday gift you could ever give him.

''You going to cum all over Daddy's cock for his birthday baby?'' he hummed, the pain from his fingernails made you rock back and forth.

Your moans turned into gasps as your eyes shot open and rolled back as you felt yourself cum. Nodding and whining as you squirted hard over his cock, covering the bed and his thighs.

He smirked, continuing to thrust inside you as you collapsed onto his chest to catch your breath. Your hot and sweaty bodies sticking together as his tip hit your soft spot over and over.

After gaining the energy, your clit clenched around his cock hearing him grunt and groan beneath you gave you the overwhelming feeling of power. Leaning backwards rocking your hips on his tip, it felt sensitive inside as you rode him closer to his orgasm.

''See Daddy, it's your turn to cum. You going to fill this pussy up, Daddy's birthday treat'' you smirked, watching his eyes flash darker as he let you fuck him.

''Oh fuck baby, I'm going to fill your pussy up for my birthday'' he grunted, his cock twitched inside you.

You could feel him trying to refrain from cumming to early but you rode faster and faster until he fucked a thick load of cum inside you. Not stopping until more his cum leaked out, if he got you pregnant right now he really wouldn't mind.

Panting heavily as you fell onto the bed next to him, laughing as he closed his eyes and pretended to snore. He smirked and leant over to kiss you before climbing off the bed and dashing into the bathroom.

As he showered, you organised the rest of the plans with his agent. Your stomach was bubbling with anxiety and excitment, after an hour you both stood on your doorstep as you waited for the car to arrive.

Joe's hand in yours as the blacked out car pulled up, his questioning had begun to annoy you but you hid it well. It was his birthday.

Much to his protesting you forced a black satin blindfold over his eyes as you drove to your first destination.

His favourite restaurant in New York was reserved completely for him as you led him inside.

Watching as his eye lit up with delight at the sight in front of him, you were brought to a table for two overlooking Central Park. You ate lusciously at the restaurant for lunch before taking a stroll through the park.

As it grew closer to the evening, Joe's hand in yours. He pulled you closer to him and kissed you.

''Thank you for a lovely day baby, I have enjoyed it so much'' he grinned, kissing you once more before walking back towards the arranged car.

''It isn't over yet'' you giggled as he fought the black satin blindfold once more.

As he opened the eyes, in front of him was a black tie outfit as you winked at him. He sighed and raised his eyebrows before quickly changing with you in the car, taking your hand as you quickly blindfolded him again and led him into the second venue.

''A bar? oh baby you've out done yourself'' he blushed, resting himself against the bar.

''Not just any bar though baby'' you giggled again, ordering over the bartender for drinks.

''It's the one where we first met'' you both spoke in unison, laughing as your lips smashed together.

The bartender took your drinks as you both remised about your first meeting, you were in a similar outfits which when he noticed his eyes shone even brighter and kissed you harder.

Pushing you hard against his body as his tongue slid into your mouth just as the bartender placed down the drinks in front of you and waited for your payment. Playfully fighting Joe with your card, you won and teased him about it being 'his day'.

You spent just under 2 hours at the bar before you shoved another blindfold over his eyes and shoved him into the car again. His tipsy protesting made you laugh as you dragged out in front of the final venue of the night.

His hand in yours as undid his blindfold, the fancy restaurant was full of live and bright lights. Round the corner all your friends sat around the table, raising their glasses and cheering at the sight of you both.

Joe grinned happily pulling you in for a hot kiss in front of everyone, causing more loud cheers from your friend group before sitting down.

You had arranged a set menu for the whole group with your friends paying ahead, spending a couple of hours with the group before giddily being pushed into the restaurant toilets by Joe.

His hands were all over you as he grinded your clit against his hands, heavy breathing against your face as he kissed you and smirked.

''I have wanted to fuck you since I saw you in that red dress'' he smirked, nibbling onto your neck where his words were mumbled.

''Joe, why don't we sneak out the back? Everyone else is going to go home soon anyway'' you winked, pointing towards the signs on the wall.

A bottle of champagne clinked in your bag as you ran out the staff delivery door giggling with Joe as the cool air hit your faces. The blacked out car started at the sight of you, still giggling as you jumped inside.

His hands were on you as he pushed you onto the backseats of the car, pinching and biting every bit of skin. His rock hard cock pressing against your skin as he lifted up your dress, pulling down your underwear and dropping them onto the floor. He found your clit and sucked softly onto it as the car pulled to a stop, giggling he stopped and stepped out the car.

Your clit throbbing from the brief attention, picking up your belongings and rushed after him. Once inside, his clothes were scattered across the house following them upstairs. Biting your lip as your eyes fell upon his completely naked body once more.

His hands grabbed you and pushed you hard onto the bed, your ass up in the air as his head buried deep between your thighs. Sucking your clit hard as your hips rocked in his face, his fingers played with your opening before sliding them one by one inside you.

Gasping at the pleasure as you rode his fingers hard, pushing your cunt against his face dampening his beard as he edged you closer to your orgasm. Your legs trembling as your head buried deeper into the bed, your moans were loud and quick.

Your eyes rolled back as your body shook, his fingers curling deeper and deeper inside you until you felt yourself squirt all over his face. His fingers continuing to slide in and out of you faster each time until you felt like screaming, your body twitched hard as you felt yourself cum for the second time.

Smirking to yourself, he let you fall onto the bed for second as he stroked his cock and positioned it between your entrance and teased your clit before sliding it inside.

Pulling you closer, he pushed your head back into the bed as his hands spanked hard onto your ass cheeks. His cock sliding in and out of you from behind, the bed rocked as you gripped onto the bed covers for minimal support.

''Fuck Joe, my cunt is so sensitive please be kind to me'' you practically screamed into the bed covers.

He laughed which rippled against your body as he thrusted harder into your dripping cunt, watching it slide in and out of you. Spanking your ass hard, enjoying the feeling as it rippled against his cock.

Panting “fuck, fuck, fuck” hard as you slid back onto his cock from behind, his fingers scratching your back as you continued to thrust back onto his cock until his moans turned into whimpers.

His hands gripped onto your hips and slammed your cunt hard onto his cock, not letting you move a muscle from the speed as his cock made your cunt wetter and wetter.

Your body shook as he thrusted harder into your cunt until you felt yourself cum for the third time that night. Squirting harder onto his cock, the sounds of your cum hitting his body and coating the bed.

He kept fucking your cunt until you felt like you couldn’t cum anymore, his fingernails hurt your hips as he groaned hard. His head tipped back as his eyes shut tightly, his cock twitched as it hit your walls hard.

“Fuck baby, Daddy is going yo fill your cunt up even more today.” He moaned pathetically as his body began to slow down his thrusts.

You rocked your hips weakily on his cock as he twitched more quickly inside you, his body shook as he came hard inside you. Not stopping completely until the mixture of your cum seeped out your sore and swollen cunt.

He hummed as he leant backwards, watching the cum slide out you with his cock. His fingers slid between your entrance, dipping inside you and lifting out the cum mixture.

Sucking it slightly off his fingers before lifting your head up and forcing his fingers in your mouth until you gagged. Making sure you tasted it too.

He spanked your ass and clit hard until you whimpered with overstimulation and exhaustion. Kissing down your body as he let you collapse onto the bed.

His body snaked around yours from behind, gripping hard onto your body as his head nestled into your neck and hummed.

“I love you baby, thank you for today. We both got some treats today” he kissed your head and neck as he felt you fall asleep quickly in his arms.

#joe quinn smut #Joe quinn #joseph quinn imagine #joseph quinn x y/n #joseph quinn x you #joseph quinn x fem! reader smut #joseph quinn x fem!reader #joseph quinn x reader #joseph quinn x f!reader #joseph quinn #joe quinn x y/n #joe quinn x you #joe quinn x fem!reader #joe quinn x reader #Joe quinn birthday

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ho-for-joequinn-fics · 2 months

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I know I said I wasn’t going to write anything else for this blog, buuuuut... I just had to get this idea out of my head.

Emperor Geta x f!servant reader

warnings: 18+ only! Minors DNI! mean!Geta (ofc), face slapping, insulting names (bitch, cunt, whore), degradation, oral (forced throat fucking), spanking, unprotected p in v smut, rough sex, creampie, profanity (obvi 💀), a happy ending yay for both Geta and Reader yay!, etc

You were a mere servant, never really caring to catch the attention of either of the Emperors, but unbeknownst to you, you had caught the undivided attention of one. Emperor Geta.

To you, Geta was a power hungry and extremely pompous asshole. And you weren’t afraid to say so. You’d never say it to his face though, knowing the consequences could quite possibly end with your demise, and you weren’t ready for death yet.

“I think he’s into you,” Mabel, one of your fellow servants, whispered while the two of you organized Emperor Geta’s wardrobe, making you furrow your eyebrows in confusion. “You should see the way he looks at you.”

“Who?” You asked, hoping she wasn’t about to say who you thought she was going to say.

“Emperor Geta.” She responded with a sheepish smile, hanging up one of his robes in its respective place.

You scoffed at that, giving your head a shake as you responded in a not as hushed manner. “I sure hope to the gods that he isn’t. Geta is a pompous asshole. I’d love to smack that cocky smirk off of his stupid fucking face.”

You noticed the way her body language and demeanor immediately shifted, back straightened and eyes wide as she seemed to stare behind you. He’s behind me, isn’t he? You slowly turned around towards where her gaze was fixed, mentally slapping yourself for expressing your feelings about Emperor Geta right in front of him. You didn’t even realize he was in the room.

He was giving you a displeased glare, pupils blackened as he seemingly burned a hole right through you. “Come here. Right now.” He demanded, his pointer finger pointing towards the floor directly in front of him, ready to fix that disrespectful mouth of yours.

“Make me.” You scoffed, turning away from him to continue your work. You weren’t about to give in to his demands when you were trying to finish your duties that he assigned you in the first place. “Pompous asshole.”

Mabel gasped at your disobedience, her gaze dropping to her feet when Emperor Geta stomped his way over to you. She’d never speak to him like that, she knew better and she feared him more than anyone in all of Rome.

Geta grabbed you by the arm and forcefully spun you around, his ringed hand laying a harsh, reprimanding smack across your face. Your head whipped to the side from the force, but you weren’t going to back down. Not yet. “You better watch your tongue, you disrespectful little bitch. I own you, so you will do as I fucking say. Got it?”

You stared up at him with defiant orbs, your fists clenched by your sides to prevent yourself from smacking him like you so desperately wanted. You could have apologized and moved on from this, but you enjoyed egging him on, wanting to see how far you could push him and if your disobedience would get you killed after all. Or if he was into you like Mabel suspected, then maybe he’d make an exception. Maybe he’d someway, somehow start to like this defiant side of yours. “Own me? You don’t, own me. I belong to no one but myself. You just think you own me because you’re a self righteous dick with power.”

Geta took in a deep breath through his nose, jaw clenching tightly at your continued disobedience. You used to be so innocent, so obedient to his every demand, what happened to that version of you? If only he knew you were intentionally getting under his skin. “If you’re going to run your mouth like a cunt, then I’m going to treat you as such.”

Immediately he was forcing you onto your knees, giving your face another harsh slap when you tried standing back up. “Stay on your fucking knees. If you’ve got nothing of value to say, then I’m going to put this mouth to better use.” He quickly freed his cock from beneath his tunic and robe, thankfully not wearing his armor at this very moment.

You had to prevent yourself from widening your eyes at how endowed he was, not wanting to give him that ego boost when his ego was already through the roof. His shaft was girthy and long, and the vein running along the length of it was visibly throbbing already. Maybe I should have disrespected him way before now if this is what I get in return.

“Open your fucking mouth and don’t make me tell you twice.” He growled, grabbing your face in his hand and squeezing your cheeks hard enough to get you to part your lips for him. As soon as your jaw dropped open, he was forcing his cock into your mouth, groaning deeply when he hit the back of your throat. “Hollow your cheeks, whore.”

You automatically choked on his cock once he reached the back of your throat, hollowing your cheeks and taking a deep breath through your nose just before he started ruthlessly thrusting back and forth, choking even more when he reached to plug your nose thus cutting off any possible supply of oxygen you could get. Maybe he is going to kill me. At least I’ll go out with his cock down my throat.

“Look at you, already choking on my cock and I’ve only just started.” He mused with a snarky smirk, making you roll your eyes in mock annoyance. His hand gripped on your hair at the back of your head while his hips repeatedly snapped forward, using his grip to force your face to meet each thrust down your throat, smirking even wider when it pulled a garbled moan from your throat. “Oh you like that, huh you filthy whore? You like it when I violate your throat? Hm?”

You couldn’t help it, you moaned even louder, your eyes rolling into the back of your head for different reasons now. You hated to admit it, but the way he was throat fucking you with no remorse had you dripping, your pussy pulsating with each inconsiderate thrust down your throat. As much as you wanted to take a breath through your nose, you couldn’t, so you tried with all your mental and physical energy to stay conscious while he took his frustration towards you out.

Geta kept his gaze on your face as he forced himself down your throat, a wider smirk tugging at his lips when he noticed tears started to spill from the corner of your eyes. He wondered to himself if this was making you learn your lesson or if you were going to continue pushing his buttons to see what else he would do to you. He couldn’t deny it, your defiance which led to this moment made him hope you would test him some more, especially since your mouth and throat felt divine. He could only imagine how your cunt felt.

You snapped your gaze back on him when your lungs started to burn from lack of oxygen, looking up at him with eyes begging him to let you breathe, your fingers gripping onto his pristine robes to prevent yourself from collapsing. “Mmf!” You whimpered, one of your hands moving to wrap around the wrist of his hand still plugging your nose.

Geta took the hint and released your nostrils from between his fingers, letting you catch your breath through your nose while he continued abusing your throat with his cock. He watched as the color of your face returned to normal now that oxygen returned to your lungs, but your tears still resumed spilling down your face. “If you’d listened to me the first time, I wouldn’t have been so cruel while I throat fucked some respect into you.”

You narrowed your eyes to glare up at him, lifting your hand to give him the middle finger which only had him grinning sadistically. You knew you were playing a dangerous game, but part of you felt that your life wasn’t on the line, he was just really going to put you in your place if you continued your disobedient acts towards him.

He suddenly pulled his cock out of your mouth, allowing you ample opportunity to take multiple deep breaths to fully satiate your lungs while he glanced over at his other servants who were trying their best to ignore what was happening. “Leave us.” He ordered, waiting until the few of them scurried out of his chambers and the doors closed behind them.

Now your heart was pounding in your chest, hoping to the gods that he wasn’t going to kill you now that the two of you were alone. You hissed when he yanked you off the floor by the hair and forced you to look at him, him smirking at how swollen your lips had become from being wrapped around his cock. Gods he’s so cocky.

“You are very lucky that you’re my favorite. If it had been one of those servants who just left to disrespect me like this, their throats would have been slit the moment their disrespectful thoughts left their mouth.” His eyes roamed your face as he spoke, before he was dragging you over towards his bed and forcefully bending you over it. “Now you’re going to lay here like the obedient girl I know you can be while I deliver a well deserved punishment and you’re going to apologize for your blatant disrespect as I do so, got it?”

“Yes, Augustus.”

Geta grinned impishly at that, finally seeing an inkling of obedience from you again. “Now that wasn’t so hard, was it? Keep that up and I’ll have forgotten all about your disobedience in no time.” His hands gripped onto the fabric of your skirts and yanked them upwards before moving to your undergarment beneath and ripping it in two right off of you, giving his lips a lick at the sight of your plush ass cheeks.

You gasped at the sheer strength in his actions, biting down on your bottom lip as his fingers started tracing along your supple flesh before letting out a loud cry when his hand came down with a hard whack. “I-I’m sorry, Augustus!” You gasped, bracing yourself for the second smack you knew was coming, crying out again when it was received.

“I’m sorry Augustus for...?” He inquired, wanting a detailed apology and nothing less.

“I-I’m sorry for disrespecting you! For calling you such mean things, for not obeying your commands, for...for intentionally getting under your skin to see how far I could push you!” Your cries grew louder when his spanks grew more harsh, fresh tears spilling down your face all over again.

“And...?”

“And I’m sorry for saying you don’t own me! I-I’m yours! All yours, Augustus! I belong to you and you only! I-I’ll do anything you ask of me, like an obedient servant does!” You braced for more spanks, but they never came. Letting out a shaky breath, you dared to look over your shoulder, finding Geta staring down at you with something new in his eyes.

“You’ll give me my heir, that’s what you’ll do for me.” He gave you no warning before he was slamming his entire length inside you, your scream so loud, your pleasure could be mistaken for murder. A guttural moan erupted from his throat when he felt how tight and wet you were, his fingers digging into your hips as he started repeatedly slamming his cock in and out of you. “Fuck, I’ve never felt a more perfect cunt in my life. She’s all mine now. Say it!”

“She’s all yours, Augustus! All yours!” You squealed as you took every harsh thrust of his cock into you, the pain mixed with pleasure a feeling you never wanted to forget. Your eyes rolled into the back of your head with each ram against your cervix, fists clenched tightly into his sheets while you started squeezing around his cock. “Right there! Right there!”

Geta groaned at the way your walls squeezed around his cock, repeatedly aiming for that exact spot so they’d continue to do so, needing the added pleasure to coax him closer to his release. He wasn’t going to stop fucking you until you were filled to the brim with his seed. “Keep fucking squeezing me, going to claim my perfect cunt by filling her with my cum.”

You did just as he demanded, giving squeeze after squeeze after squeeze around his cock while he ruthlessly fucked you until finally he was tossing his head back with a roar and filling you with thick, heavy loads of his cum just as you coated his cock with your own cum. You buried your face into his bedding with a mewl as he filled you, not stopping your squeezes until he told you to.

“That’s enough.” He hissed after a minute, slowly pulling out of you once your vise-like clenches ceased and allowed him to easily slip out of you. He rolled you over onto your back after a moment before lifting you up to place you further up his bed, grabbing one of his pillows and using it to raise your hips up so not a single drop of his seed would go to waste. “Now you stay right here while I go tend to some important matters. Don’t let anything drip out of you, okay? Gotta be sure my seed takes.”

You gave your head a nod, watching as he fixed himself up while a thousand thoughts started swimming around your mind. You couldn’t stand him this morning, but now he was everything you could ever need. Did this change things between the two of you? Did he really want a servant to be the one to bear him his heir? Were you more than just a servant to him now? You needed to know.

“Augustus...” You whispered, nervously chewing on your bottom lip as you prepared yourself for the questions you had.

“Hmm?” He inquired, tossing your destroyed undergarments to the floor after cleaning his cock of your cum before tucking it back beneath his tunic.

“You don’t really want me to be the one to bear your heir, do you? I’m just a lousy servant... Don’t you want someone of a higher status to be the one to do so?” You frowned, your gaze refusing to meet his as you fiddled with your thumbs.

Geta sighed, moving to sit down beside you on the bed and reaching for your hands to still their anxious movements. “Look at me.” He commanded in a more gentle tone now, waiting for you to look up at him before continuing. “You’re not just a lousy servant. I’ve been wanting to make you more than that since your parents sold you into servitude, I just had to wait for the proper time to do so.”

“Really?” You blushed, completely taken aback by his confession.

“I did tell you you’re my favorite and I didn’t mean as a servant, I meant in general. I knew you were special when I first laid eyes on you.” He chuckled, bringing your knuckles to his lips for a kiss. “I’m sorry if I was too hard on you earlier. I just, I don’t take too kindly to that level of disrespect and when you kept pushing, my resolve snapped. I wasn’t expecting my favorite girl to say such cruel things about me.”

“I’m sorry.” You whispered, a soft frown on your face. “I only thought those things about you because I still have so much pent up anger over my parents selling me to be a servant. I guess I just never gave you the chance to prove yourself to be more than what you show yourself to be to everyone else in Rome.”

“Will you give me that chance now? Will you let me show you that there’s more to me than meets the eye?”

“Of course.” You smiled, your breath catching in your throat when he cupped your cheek and leaned in to press a deep kiss to your lips, your hands cupping his face as you kissed him in return.

“Thank you. I promise you, you will not be disappointed.” He breathed into the space between your mouths as he rested his forehead against yours. “I have some things I need to tend to right now, but I promise come tomorrow, you will no longer be a servant.”

Geta held true to his promises, proving to you that deep down he had more than a heart of stone, and turning you from the servant you were sold to be into the Empress you were destined to be. You never would have anticipated marrying the man you once despised, but now you wouldn’t change it for a thing.

Thank you for reading! Comments and reblogs are highly appreciated! 🩷 This was annoyingly difficult for me to write because I just couldn’t get the words to flow how I wanted, so I hope you enjoyed how it turned out 🥺

Tagging some Emperor Geta sluts 🩷 @nailbatanddungeon @usergeta @somethingvicked @ceriseheaven @littlexdeaths @3rd-conchord @jasminelafleur @eddiesxangel

#emperor geta x reader #emperor geta x you #emperor geta x f!reader #emperor geta x servant!reader #emperor geta blurb #emperor geta smut #emperor geta #gladiator 2 #joseph quinn #joe quinn

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the-witty-pen-name · 5 months

Text

Love is Blind (Part 3)

Eddie Munson x PlusSize!F!Reader

Summary: In a last ditch effort to evade the normal disappointments of dating, a group of misfits desperate to have someone see who they are on the inside volunteer for the most recent brain chemistry study at Hawkins Lab.

Word Count: 2.9k

Warnings: 18+ ONLY, smut in later parts (part 4), reader has low self-esteem and struggles with self love/acceptance, anxiety/trauma related to bullying, tooth rot worthy fluff, Eddie being a major flirt, cursing, mentions of substance use, descriptions of bullying & people being jerks but like also very overdone tropes, mentions of smut

A/N: Please let me know if you liked it!! Feel free to send me an ask if you want to fangirl with me over these two because I cannot stand them at this point. LOL Or if you want to share any ideas/predictions for upcoming parts with me or other ideas for future stories with Eddie, I would love to hear them. Also, if I forgot to include a warning that should be included, please let me know!

Series Masterlist

“Eddie.”

“Hey, Eddie.”

“Earth to Eddie.”

“EDDIE.”

“Shit! Sorry,” he says, breaking out of his thoughts and coming back to reality. He stares at his notes in his DM folder and he literally has no idea where the campaign has left off. He clears his throat and awkwardly flips through the pages. “Umm..”

“We just made it to the fishing town and we were tasked by a local merchant to kill a sea serpent that’s poisoning the local fish in exchange for..”

“Oh yeah,” he interjects, grabbing the correct script he needs to continue. “Uh, did you roll..?”

“Are you kidding me, man! What the hell?” Gareth exclaims, exasperated. “What’s wrong with you today?”

Eddie’s face turns pink, shaking his head and ignoring the question. He was not going to admit to being distracted. He’s not embarrassed to talk to the guys about you, but he hasn’t told anyone he signed up for the study. He didn’t want to admit he was desperate or lonely, he’s too proud. He knows his friends don’t care, but it’s a mental block he can’t pass.

“Nothing, I’m good. Just let it go,” he says defensively.

“No way. Fucking spill it,” Jeff laughs.

Eddie racks his mind for the most sane way to answer their questions. He sighs, pushing a mess of his curly hair out of his face.

“Who is she?” Gareth asks, raising an eyebrow.

***

DAY FOUR

“I’m mad at you,” Eddie says, and you roll your eyes.

“What did I do now?” You ask, playful sarcasm evident in your voice.

“You’re throwing me off my game”

“I don’t even know what you mean by that.”

“Obviously because I’m really cool and popular,” he jokes, “I’m a Dungeon Master as you know.”

“Yup, I’m familiar,” you toy.

“My friends called my ass out so many times last night for not paying attention and I kept fucking up.”

“I don’t appreciate you pinning this on me,” you chuckle. “I didn’t do anything.”

“Lies!” He says in a bravado. “You are the distraction! You have managed to weasel your way into every aspect of mind- I hope you’re proud of yourself. I’m probably going to be dethroned. My reign is over.”

You bite your bottom lip, to hold back the goofy smile you know is creeping over your whole face. Never before has anyone made you feel like this. The notebook to keep track of other “dates” is long forgotten. You only want to continue talking to Eddie. You wonder if any of the other people you spoke to felt a connection this strong. You’re dying to know if there are other people who feel as good as you right now.

“What were you thinking about?” you ask shyly. You can hear the way it makes Eddie stop in his tracks. You assume he wears some sort of chain on his pants cause you can hear it when he paces, but suddenly, his end of the wall falls silent.

“How honest do you want me to be?” he asks, suddenly sounding shy.

“What do you mean by that?”

“Well, I could go the cheesy, romantic, ‘I was thinking about you’ way- which is true. Or, I could be brutally honest because ‘I was thinking about you’ in this context has much more implications than that.”

“You’re confusing me,” you laugh, “just tell me.”

“Do you ever fantasize about when we get out of here? In like, a you know-”

“Like sexually?” you ask, throwing him a bone. He was drowning.

“Yeah,” he admits, and you can hear the chain on his pant leg as he fidgets.

“Yes,” you answer honestly, “I do.”

“I think about it all the time,” he says, the confession spilling out, “The fact that I can’t touch you is driving me fucking insane. It’s not even like just like the thought of getting to fuck you- it’s like being close to you and like feeling your body heat, or like the weight of you sitting on my lap, what it feels like to just touch your skin- just everything that we’re being denied. I don’t even have a visual in my head to go off of it’s just like- I don’t know, man…”

You wince at the mention of sitting on his lap. “I don’t know if you’d want me on your lap for a long time..,” you sound defeated.

“Um, don’t speak for me,” he cuts you off, playfully. “Any man who doesn’t want the full weight of his woman on his lap is a fucking idiot. Ugh, I don’t even think you understand just how amazing it is. I don’t care if you try to fight me on this, princess. You’re sitting on me, and I will love every second of it.”

“I’m not thin, Eddie,” you whisper, feeling defeated. You hear him blow a raspberry and then he knocks on the wall.

“I… don’t… care,” he emphasizes by drawing out each word. “You need to believe me. I couldn’t care less about your weight, your height, your hair… whatever it is. I like you! And that means I like every part of you.”

His voice begins to raise, like he is yelling up, “If these fuckers would realize we’re done already and let me out.” He then lowers his voice like he’s looking back to the wall. “I want you. The experiment fucking works, I wish I could show you what you do to me cause maybe then it’ll finally stick. I’m going out of my mind that I can’t touch you and show you how much I want you, your body, everything. Do you need me to spell it out?”

“Would you have still found me attractive if we met outside of this experiment?” you ask, “I bet you wouldn’t have even looked my way if you saw me at a bar or something.”

“Sweetheart,” he coaxes, “absolutely. I know that I would’ve been annoying the shit out of you for your number. You’d have been the one to reject me, I guarantee it.”

“I would have never,” you reply.

“So if it’s possible for you to know that you wouldn't have rejected me without seeing me,” Eddie muses, “why can’t you believe the same for me?”

“You haven’t asked me a single thing about my appearance,” he continues, “Do you care how much I weigh? Do you care if I’m short?”

“Not at all. I haven’t thought about it,” you admit.

“I haven’t either. Now, please let me have my fantasy of you sitting on my lap please,” he whines, “I need something to get me through the day, Christ.” You laugh at his fake annoyance.

You’re so happy at how he’s able to talk you down. It amazes you how he’s able to see through the insecurities and brings you back down to Earth.

“Okay, okay,” you say, settling back into the couch and getting comfortable. You rest your head back.

“I don’t know, basically, we’re in the middle of the campaign- I literally spent weeks writing it,” he continues, “and I literally just can’t stop thinking about how amazing it would be if you were there. I’m just sitting there, thinking about what it would feel like to just have you sitting on my lap while we’re playing and then I’m thinking about how I want to feel lean back on me and I’d have my arm around your waist holding you, and maybe I’d rub little circles on the side of your thigh and I thought about how soft you probably feel and then suddenly I’m sporting the most embarrassing boner which thankfully no one saw- Fuck, this is what you’re doing to me.”

***

“Is there any way to end the trial early?” Eddie asks, sitting in the interview room. There’s a man putting a pulse oximeter on his right index finger and another testing his blood pressure with a monitor on his left side.

Two other technicians sit across from Eddie, taking notes from Eddie’s answers on a clipboard. They have tested his levels of dopamine and norepinephrine. They’re taking extensive notes on Eddie’s physical reactions to you, and the same is done to all of the candidates- including you. They continue to ignore Eddie’s questions as they ramble on about his levels of oxytocin.

“In order for us to gather all of the information necessary, this isn’t possible,” one of them finally answers.

“But I’m telling you how I feel- I’m telling you it works,” he insists.

“Mr. Muson,” one says, closing a file folder that contains his charts. “This is a study in brain chemistry. You agreed to participate for the designated number of days and in exchange you’d receive compensation. Your conversations between yourself and the other candidates is not our business, nor what you choose to do afterwards. Our job here is to collect data, not the details of your personal life.”

“I can’t believe this,” he scoffs, rolling his eyes. He pulls off the oximeter and grabs his jean jacket. He walks out, despite their protests, flipping them off as he goes. He couldn’t care less about the lousy $200. As far as he was concerned, they poked and prodded the two of you enough.

Of course, he did show up the next day. Promptly with a big grin on his face, he walked in with a happy go-lucky attitude that the entire lab team was secretly sick of dealing with. These sudden outbursts and dramatic tirades were becoming a staple of Eddie’s interviews and they equally couldn’t wait to be done with him.

***

DAY FIVE

“Are these dice?” You ask with a chuckle, opening the small, black velvet bag that’s been left for you on the table in the room. You empty the bag out into your hand and watch as the dice roll into your palm one at a time. They’re all red and shimmer as you move them around in your cupped hand.

“Well, I wanted you to have them,” you hear his voice explain from the other side of the wall. You’re beaming as you carefully pour them back into the bag and tie it off.

“This is so sweet, Eds,” you marvel. “I love them.”

“I also brought my guitar and like in a non-douchebag way I was kind of hoping to play something for you,” he says, his guitar perched on his lap. “I’ve just been working on this song and I wanted your opinion on it.”

It's surprisingly soft sounding. You were expecting heavy guitar, something really metal based on what Eddie has told you about his music taste and his band. It’s slower paced, like a dreamy, slow rock ballad.

You wished you could see him, observe how he looks when he’s concentrating or how his fingers look strumming against the cords. You just know he has the most beautiful hands. You imagine his fingers and try to visualize them flexing as he strums. You’re so distracted by it that you almost miss him singing a verse.

“It’s not done yet,” he prefaces, still strumming. “I’m still working on the lyrics so don’t think too much about them, just like the meaning and the melody you know?”

“Yeah totally,” you hum in agreement. “I think it sounds great.” He smiles at the praise.

***

Before

You anxiously sit by the front window, peeking out between the blinds occasionally. You smooth out the skirt of the new dress your mom bought you, and you make sure your hair is still how you requested. Your mom let you wear makeup and you picked eyeshadow that matches your dress and you feel like a million bucks. It’s your ninth grade formal, and the star of the JV basketball team asked you to be his date.

The minutes tick by and the time changes from reasonably late to stood up. You still hold out hope, and reject your parents' offers to just drive you to the dance. It’s been 45 minutes now, and you still hoped he’d be there. It was long past an hour that you admitted that he wasn’t coming.

The following Monday you learned the whole thing was a prank, and he never wanted to ask you to the dance. It’s in the school paper that he’s at the dance, dancing cheek to cheek with one of the cheerleaders, who you can’t help but compare yourself to.

***

Eddie is sitting at the middle school cafeteria table alone. He’s about a hundred pages into the Hobbit and the crusts of his peanut butter sandwich are forgotten about on the crinkly brown paper bag Uncle Wayne packed his lunch in. He’s long forgotten he’s sitting alone, far too engrossed in the story to care, when suddenly his head is yanked back by someone tugging on his t-shirt.

“What’s up, Freak?” the voice asks before shoving Eddie back towards the table. He catches himself on the edge before his head comes in contact with the surface. He winces as anger boils up inside him. The three jocks laugh amongst themselves until a familiar voice shoos them away.

“Sorry about them,” she says apologetically as Eddie looks to see her. Chrissy. He notices how she glances from him to the cafeteria table where the cheerleaders sit, and Eddie knows she doesn’t want to be seen with him for too long.

“You can go, I’m fine,” Eddie says, forcing a laugh to make her feel better. “But, uh, I wanted to ask you-”

“Okay, thanks,” she says, cutting him off and practically skipping to sit next to the prick who shoved him. Eddie recoils as the jock’s arm wraps around her. Eddie rolls his eyes and gets up to have lunch outside. Along with the remains of his lunch, he shoves the necklace he meant to give her in the bin. He’d stayed up past his bedtime, Wayne showing him how to drill a small hole into the top of one of his guitar picks to put a metal jewelry loop through so it could be put on a silver chain.

***

You’re sitting at the table in the dimly lit restaurant and sipping on your cocktail when you see him walk in. He matches the description your friend gave you, and you feel yourself smile at how cute he is- definitely living up to the hype. Your friend spent weeks convincing you to go out on this date- one of her boyfriend’s best friends. They’re in the same fraternity.

You can see as he walks into the dining room, he’s looking around trying to find his date. You offer a smile when he makes eye contact, and you offer a small wave.

“James?” You ask, “you’re exactly like how Donna described you.” He offers a polite closed lipped smile, and a nod, taking a seat across from you without saying anything.

As the date continues, you notice you’re doing a lot of the talking. You ask him questions and you’re met with a lot of one word answers. He looks detached, checking his watch and his attention seems to be wandering throughout the restaurant at anything but you. By the time your entrees arrive, he yawns.

“I’m sorry, did I do something or say something?” you ask, hesitantly.

“No, no you’re good,” he says, straightening his posture like it would correct the behavior he’s been exhibiting.

He pays for dinner, and you ask if he’d like to do this again sometime (just to be polite, you knew it was going nowhere). He sucks in air from between his teeth, and lets out an exhale.

“You’re a nice person,” he says, putting his hands in his pockets as he waits for the valet to bring his car. “I’m sorry, but you aren’t really my type. Tom didn’t tell me anything about you really. I just felt like we didn’t click.” You notice the way his eyes scan your body, the unspoken awkwardness of you knowing what he isn’t saying. You nod, and say strained goodbyes as he gets in his car. You wished you were more surprised.

***

Eddie is met with dirty looks when he approaches a girl at the bar. He feels her eyes on his tattoos and on his clothes, judging him. He sees her friend, who's also looking at him, lean in and whisper something and they both laugh. He knows the joke is on him, yet again.

He opts to hang where he is, leaning against one of the high top tables, when he watches another guy approach her. He’s muscular, of course he is, and Eddie looks down at his own torso in comparison as this guy’s abs strain his shirt. Eddie scoffs, but now feels incredibly insecure at how his own shirt hangs loosely on his figure.

***

DAY SIX

“Are you still worried about tomorrow?” Eddie asks, playing haphazardly with his rings as he sits with his forearms rested on his thighs.

“A little,” you admit sheepishly. “Are you?”

“More excited than nervous,” he replies honestly. “This whole thing has been fucking wild,” he chuckles, shaking his head.

“Insane,” you agree, laying on the couch, staring up at the ceiling.

“I just wanted to ask, no pressure,” Eddie says, clearing his throat, “Uh the other day, when we talked about, you know- what’s gonna happen when we see each other…”

“Yes?”

“You said to not hold back, I don’t remember exactly what it was but along the lines of ‘I don’t want you to hold back. Just whatever feels right to you in that moment, do it. Kiss me, touch me, I’m down for everything.’ Or something. I just want to make sure…”

“You don’t remember exactly, huh?” you tease.

“Is that still what you want?” he asks earnestly.

“Without a doubt,” you smile.

PART 4

TAGLIST

@woahnotmecryingoverafanfiction @ali-r3n @cherrycolas-things @hellfirebabe666 @trixyvixx @stardancerluv @i--wont-run-this-time @mewchiili @muamazon4 @1975lily @sadbitchfangirl @strangerthings36 @fanficfanatic000 @andrearose89 @sosawwycantrelate @animechick555

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stardancerluv · 1 year

Text

Petal and the Beast

Part Two

Summary: You are out with friends hoping to forget Michael.

Notes/Warnings: Suggestive 18+ thoughts, drinking (be safe!). For the collage I used pics of Joe from the GQ red carpet because he was rather 🥵 to give the idea of what he looks like at this bar. The ankle-boots & cocktail are to give an idea of how reader & her interests. Reader is fem.

Thank you for reading! Re-blogs, feedback & ❤️ are wonderful, thank you!!!

Meeting your friends for cocktails, you were able to lose yourself in their idle chatter. All week long, all your mind did was lap back to Michael.

The way his devil may care smirk curled his lips, how his chain grazed your chest as he moved between your legs. You couldn’t believe it possible, but you were addicted to the crumbs of that night. You yearned for another tumble between the sheets with him.

Sighing, you glanced out the window as you friend Rebecca shared her office gossip. Eager to lose yourself in the twinkling lights of the office buildings that filled out the skyline. Your breath caught, forcing you to cough as you watched Michael walk in. You grabbed your cocktail and finished what was left of it.

“Y/N, love are you ok?” Your other friend Janet patted you on the back, looking at you concerned.

You nodded and giggled nervously. “I’m fine. I’m fine.”

“So, you won’t give Andy a second chance?” Rebecca, had really felt good with the match she had made for you.

You glanced as he made his way by your table. Your heart began to race. Yet again, you had trouble gathering a breath.

Pressing your lips together, you shook your head. “No, he had his chance. He didn’t even call to apologize.”

Your friend made a face. “He told me he did.”

To be honest, he did but then Michael had showed up and you stopped looking at your phone. At this time, you didn’t care to tell your friends of your tryst with Michael. The waitress, placed a fresh cocktail in front of you. You were grateful.

“Well, the next morning doesn’t count.” You took a sip.

“Oh my god. Did you just see what walked by?” Rebecca leaned towards you and Janet.

You tried to play dumb and shrugged. “Who?” You glanced around.

Spotting Michael, you spotted how like you he was with others. You swallowed, seeing a red head grab his upper arm smiling up at him. How you wished to trade places.

“Now if we do, sweetheart. Don’t be catching feelings since I saved you from weaving and wobbling home by your lonesome last night, alright?”

You weren’t, you just wanted to feel his passions again. That was not feelings. You were not a silly little school girl with a crush.

You had felt so alive and reckless with him. Was it bad you wanted that again?

Chewing your cheek, feeling your frustration grow you quickly excused yourself from your friends. Finding, the ladies and seeing that it was empty, relief filled you. You leaned heavily on the door and sighing, you relaxed.

Going to the sink you splashed some cold water on your face. Dabbing yourself dry, taking a breath you headed back to your friends.

A small sound escaped your lips when a hand reached out in the shadowy hallway pulled up against them. “Let me go!”

You wiggled, a rich chuckle filled your ears and you stopped struggling. You looked up and gasped.

“Hi there, petal.” A smile was splashed across his face.

You pulled your wrist free, his gripped tightened before letting you go.

“You’re strong.”

Your bracelets jangled as rubbed your wrist.

“Do you always pull people to you in darkened hallways ?”

He chuckled. “Only ones who I slept with.” His lips curled into a lopsided smirk, that made your stomach do a somersault.

“You could just say hello.”

He took a step closer, his torso grazing yours. “What’s the fun in that?”

You grimaced and shook your head.

“Its nice to see you again Petal.”

You felt heat fill your cheeks at his pet name for you.

“I’m glad you are happy to see me too.”

“I only blushed.”

His face drew close. “That means your happy to see me too.” You could feel as he breathed.

“No it doesn’t.”

“Yes, it does.” His lips now grazed yours.

“Yes, it does.” You relented, and just as fast he pulled back.

He chuckled. “Since that is settled.” You could feel as his eyes moved over you. “Want me to meet me later for darts or something?”

“Or something?”

He shrugged. “Yes.”

“Where?”

“Where we met.”

“When?”

“Say 9?”

“Ok, that will work.”

“Good.”

You looked at him and then back towards your friends and back at him.

“Oh, after you Petal. I want to watch you move.” He made a gallant gesture.

You smiled and shook your head. “Alright, see you later.” With butterflies flapping hard in your stomach, you turned and walked away.

@amethyst-serenade @jamiethebanished @babybluebex (because you’re such an inspiration with your writing…hope you don’t mind!)

@lavenderquinn @moviegirlsblog @eternalmunson @munsongirl48 @seatnights (since you were all so wonderful to reblog me…I tagged you all, hope you don’t mind!) @emma77645

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boogiewrites · 2 years

Text

Seeing Stars Pt. 21

Part 1 if you missed it!

The aftermath of Star and Eddie's big fight spills over into the lives of those around them. It takes them a few tries before they're able to talk again, both feeling hurt and defensive. What will it take for Eddie's stubborn nature to be derailed? What will be the thing that makes Star realize she has to confront her fears to grow? Eddie finds out from the source what Star went through in her past relationship. Star is left with no more reasons to deny that she's in love with Eddie.

CW: Descriptions of events that happened in an abusive relationship given by the victim. Not graphic but I still wanted to mention it. The abuser uses hurtful language toward the victim. Use of gay slurs by the abuser. A short conversation on men and women and their differences, it's a bit black and white and outdated so I wanted to mention that as well, gender roles and that. More fighting and more hurt. But also a light at the end of the tunnel.

Star survived the long lonely night after her and Eddie’s fight. She drove to school, painfully aware of the fact that she was very alone. She had only taken her sunglasses off if commanded by teachers. She was hung over, she felt like hell down to her bones. New depths of feeling hurt and terrible had been discovered.

She was shaking, watching the clock tick to lunch. She was starving and somehow also nauseous. She didn’t know how to face him. Would he act like nothing happened? Would he tell her to fuck off? She had no idea. So she acted in the way he had called her, and she hid in the bathroom for lunch. She wasn’t proud. She’d try again tomorrow.

Feeling defeated already, the universe felt it suited to further punish Star for withholding her feelings. If she wouldn’t open up and be vulnerable on her own, it could always beat her into submission. So it started with her car. Except that’s exactly what it wouldn’t do. Start. She was on the side of the road out of town and banging her head against the steering wheel. Unlike the guys in her life, she didn’t know much about cars. When your older brother is a great mechanic you never have to learn anything. She let out a groan before popping the hood to make it feel like she was doing something. That way when Robbie inevitably asked her what happened she could say she looked and that it wasn’t on fire at least. She grabbed her bags, locked up the car, and started the walk home. The dark clouds were a middle finger from the universe as it started to rain.

“I would say it can’t get any worse but I know you’ll prove me wrong and hit me with lightning or something so okay I GET IT!” She shouted alone on the side of the road with her arms in the air in annoyance. Luckily it wasn’t too long of a walk.

Tomorrow came, and she’d found Eddie completely ignoring her in their classes like the day before. He made her wonder if she’d gone invisible. She didn’t know he could act like that. But then again, she hadn’t expected him to blow up like he had either. Even if she was starting to understand it. She felt really strange about it. As heartbroken and sad as she was, she felt oddly… calm. She didn’t know that it was acceptance creeping in. Deep down she agreed with everything he’d said. She just had to realize it for herself now.

Greeting her was a not-unusual collection of mail on her counter Robbie had politely sorted for her. She knew the news couldn’t be any worse than the one she’d already got about Bobby so she flicked through them without much thought until one from a Chicago address came into view. Holding it with unsure hands she realized it was from the art scholarship group.

“I don’t even have to open this with the week I’m having do I?” She said aloud.

Sure enough.

“We regret to inform you you were not selected to receive-“ she sighed and tossed it into the trash can not bothering to read the rest. “Fucking great. So I’m stuck here with a guy I love that hates me now and I can’t even escape after graduation to be some shitty artist. Great.” She kicked the cupboard and immediately regretted it. “I guess this summer I’ll be working doubles until I collapse to save up, huh?” She plopped into the bed, full of disappointment in herself.

The next day she made it halfway to the Hellfire table. Eddie still ignoring her, she thinks she would’ve preferred if he was been glaring at her. Indifference hurt more somehow. So she turned at the last minute and sat with Robin. She didn’t ask why. At least not at the table. She did demand answers when it was just her alone, so Star gave in and went to Family Video to spill the beans to both her and Steve. Both were disappointed in her. Both were surprised at Eddie.

After rehashing everything with the Family Video duo, she felt a new wave of gloom wash over her. The bad news of the scholarship and an out-of-service car was enough to push her into old habits. She fell back on the old coping mechanisms she’d taken comfort in before and found herself at The Hideout. She wasn’t proud of it.

Unlike his usual behavior, Eddie took to the confines of the dive too. He knew he could be left alone to brood and have a few drinks. Fulfill some aesthetic of a heartbroken man wallowing in his self-pity for a bit. But he’d been wrong. Now he was trapped, unable to leave the corner booth where he’d hidden away because Star was busy drowning her sorrows across the bar. He had his hood up, zip-up black hoodie, and thankfully no major identifying articles of clothing like his vest. Star had been quiet at first, sulking and somber, sipping away at hard liquor and making small talk with the bartender she liked. The longer the night went on, the louder she got. In 2 hours she was singing karaoke and although it wasn’t bad, the articulation of her words was certainly lacking. Sad song after sad song she went, being ignored by the few other bar customers. It wasn’t hard to tell the poor girl was going through something, so they let it be. She was finishing up a Queen song, trying to sing every part, which was physically impossible, but that certainly wasn’t stopping her from trying. To Eddie’s surprise he saw Steve enter the bar, a noticeable sigh, then a fond smile, a shake of his head as he watched her perform. He took in the space around him. A leftover paranoia from his trauma always compelled him to know where exits were, see who was in the room, and check for danger. He missed waltzing into a room without a care, thinking he was untouchable.

He met Eddie’s eyes, and despite his hair being pulled back into his hood to make himself less noticeable, Steve recognized him. At first surprise, a step back and glancing quickly around the room. His face then shifted and gave him a look that Eddie had seen him give the kids. It was full of irritation and disappointment. Eddie’s eyes widened as he saw he’d been discovered, quickly shaking his head no, pleading with Steve through his eyes to not draw attention to him. Steve picked up on the situation quickly, crossed his arms, and rolled his eyes, head still shaking back and forth as he ran his hand through his hair and left Eddie’s line of sight to retrieve Star.

He was being gentle despite how annoyed he was, Eddie could hear him politely telling Star it was time to go. He heard Star perk up at his voice, saw her melt, and hug him around the neck tightly.

“Oh, Stevie. M’so glad you’re here.” she cooed, kissing his face.

“Alright, there hun.” Steve pat her back and rubbed it as she nuzzled into his chest.

“God you smell so good.” she groaned. Eddie felt heat rise in his face.

“Thanks,” he mumbled, knowing any response from him wouldn’t truly be heard. “Let’s go home. C’mon. Get your coat.” he instructed the wobbly lady.

“We gonna go to your place?” she asked.

“Do you want to?”

“Whatever you wanna do Stevie, baby.” she pat his cheek and Eddie scowled. “Wherever you wanna take me I’ll go,” she said with a bright smile and a nod. She was fully giving in, throwing her misplaced affections at Steve. He was handsome and sweet, and she was craving intimacy something awful. Of course, Steve had no intention of letting her try anything. Eddie was his friend, and Star was drunk. That wouldn’t stop her from acting out though.

“Let’s get you back home then,” he said putting his arm around her shoulders and directing her out of the bar. He shot daggers at Eddie one last time, a look of, 'see what you’ve done'. But to his surprise, Eddie was shooting them right back at him this time. Steve scrunched his face in confusion, shaking his head and turning his attention back to Star who had slid her hand into Steve’s back pocket.

“You gonna stay with me? I don’t wanna be alone.” he heard her whine as they walked out the door. Eddie didn’t hear Steve’s reply but he could certainly hear the blood rushing in his ears with jealousy.

So the next day she sat with them at lunch. Eddie was surprised but from a lifetime of hiding his emotions he didn’t give away anything at first. She tried to talk to him, fleeting moments of eye contact as he’d lower them to the table and give her sharp, short answers. He could see her hair hadn’t been washed that morning or the night before, he saw the way it lay flatter in the back because she’d slept on her back. Or had she been on her back for other reasons? He took in every inch of skin he could, any mark of redness or bruise pulling his attention and fueling his delusion that she’d slept with Steve. There was a red splotch on her neck, it wasn’t like the ones he’d left on her before but his mind wasn’t listening to reason. He was fuming, grinding his teeth down to nothing. Star could feel the anger coming from him now, assuming it was from her. The conversation kept moving among the other people at the table.

“I don’t know, I’ll ask Steve after school, I couldn’t get ahold of him last night.” Eddie’s eyes shot to Dustin, snapping the pretzel he had in his fingers.

“He was with me,” Star said casually and Eddie wondered if she was crueler than he had ever imagined she could be.

“Oh, did he say anything about this weekend?”

“No, sorry. Not that I remember anyway. But we weren’t really talking about him taking you all to the movies so I doubt it.”

“What were you talking about then?” Eddie hide his emotion, looking down as he asked then a pointed swing up as he saw Star turn her head with hopeful eyes that were matched with his, black with anger.

“We-uh.” she stuttered at the surprise of the question, and more so the fact that he was speaking to her directly at all.

“Or were you two not doing much talking?” he accused and she tilted her head in confusion. Everyone felt the wave of anger now, looking at Eddie with the same expression.

“I don’t-? I was…” she huffed, her cheeks turning red. “I didn’t wanna talk about it but I was drunk and he took me home,” she confessed, looking down, her hands fidgeting. She was ashamed. She looked at him defensively, turning in on herself, feeling hurt from his stinging accusation. Dustin glared at Eddie.

“Dude,” Jeff said sympathetically to Star at Eddie’s tone.

“Why are you talking to her like that?”

“If you’re so sore-assed about it maybe you should’ve taken her home.” Gareth, a surprising voice of reason caught Eddie’s attention as they stared each other down. No one knew exactly what had happened, they only knew Eddie was being a dick this week.

“Thankfully Steve was there to take care of me last night,” she said looking down, gathering her things as Dustin reached to stop her but she shook her head. “You’d be surprised what a little support and kindness would make a girl wanna do.” She stared right into Eddie's eyes as she stood. She was seething with anger. She wanted him to hurt, wanted him to think his friends had scorned him by sleeping together. She walked away with her tray and Eddie was left to be gawked at.

So naturally, the next question Eddie asked Steve when he went to Family Video the next day was direct and full of venom.

“Are you fucking her?” He almost growled at an unsuspecting Steve in the empty store. His eyes blinked rapidly, his hands raising between him and the glaring man across the counter.

“Woah, Woah. What?” Steve sputtered out.

“Don’t play stupid, sweetheart. I know you well enough to know you aren't.”

“That’s the weirdest compliment I’ve ever gotten,” Steve said bewildered.

“Stop avoiding the question.”

“No!” Steve shouted, now moving into being offended. “What the hell, man? You think I’d sleep with Star? Now? You’re off your meds, man. Don’t be crazy.”

“I saw her all over you at the bar.”

“She was drunk. You saw her. You know how she gets. She’s very friendly.” his nose wrinkled at the underselling of Star’s physical affection needs when intoxicated.

“And she’s pissed at me. Plenty of reasons to try it with you. I know she wants to fuck you. It’s the perfect storm to fuck me over.”

“Calm down,” Steve said in a drawn-out deep voice, leaning on the counter. “We didn’t do anything like that. I took her home, and all she did was cry over you.” he shook his head, his hair bobbing at the force.

Eddie blinked and leaned back in response.

“You think I’d sleep with her knowing you loved her? Good to know you think so highly of me, shit.” he leaned back and crossed his arms.

“I-” Eddie shook his head and put his hands to his face. “I’m sorry, Steve. Fuck.” he groaned. “I accused her at lunch and she-”

“You didn’t.” Steve groaned, his chin leaning forward “You idiot! Why would you do that!” he shook his hands at the run-down looking man across the counter.

“I don’t know. I’m all messed up. I saw her all over you and I saw red, man. I’m sorry.”

“All she did was sling snot and blubber on about how much she loved you but she couldn’t say it because what if she fucked it all up? What if she’s a terrible person and you find out and leave her? And you go and accuse her of sleeping with me? No offense but- you know, NO, FULL offense that’s bullshit!” Steve was angry on his behalf as well as Star’s now.

“I see that now,” Eddie muttered and hit his head on the counter in front of him.

“Get your shit together man, Jesus.” Steve scowled. “Go talk to her. Apologize. Don't be a dick. She’d never do that to you. I can’t believe you’d think that. And about me! I thought we were friends!”

“We are! I’m sorry. Old habits die hard.”

“You’d gonna die alone with your old habits if you don’t stop being such a stubborn jackass.” Steve pointed out, leaning down to Eddie’s mushed face on the counter.

“I know I hurt her, I thought she was trying to hurt me. I know she used to-”

“Yeah. USED TO. She even said that. That before she would’ve tried. To distract herself for a minute with someone else. But she wouldn’t anymore because of you. That she didn’t want to take a step back or hurt you. She was already upset she got so drunk.”

“Fuck.”

“Yeah. Fuck… you.” Steve said with a joking tone but there was truth behind it.

“Yeah, fuck me.” Edie groaned and hit his head a few times on the counter.

“Stop that shit. Someone’s gonna come in and 5150 you.” he shoved Eddie’s shoulder and he stood up.

“The Van Halen album?” Eddie asked, a bit dazed.

“Did you hit your head that hard?”

“Sorry I-”

“The more you say that the less it means you know.” Steve glared.

“What?”

“Sorry doesn't mean shit if it doesn’t come with changed behavior.”

“You sound like her.”

“Good! Because she’s smart! She’s trying to get better despite you being a baby and saying you were done with her because she couldn’t say she loved you back.”

“Wouldn’t you wanna hear it?” Eddie hit his hands on the counter, the weight of them making a heavy sound.

“Of course! But when she tells you she can’t because she’s afraid she’ll fuck everything up and then YOU go and leave, proving her right…what does that accomplish? Nothing! You need to see how much she loves you. She needs to be brave enough to say it and not think everything is gonna go to hell when she does. You’re both wrong and you’re both right.”

“I have the right to want to hear it from her. I’m not wrong.”

“That isn’t wrong, no. It’s how you’re going about it.”

“I deserve to hear it. I said she has to say it for me to be able to keep doing whatever it is we’re doing. I’m not even asking her to be my girlfriend, I just want to hear her say it.” Steve sighed, seeing the circles under Eddie’s eyes and the hurt behind them. He was just as sensitive as anyone else. So much for the whole macho tough routine. “If I don’t stick to my guns, then nothing I say means anything.”

“Yeah, you’re stubborn.”

“I’m not stubborn, I’m sticking to what I said.”

“Dude! That’s THE definition of stubborn.”

“Ugh!” Eddie threw his arms up. “It’s like everyone’s gone crazy this week.”

“If everyone around you is an asshole…. Chances are you’re the asshole.” Steve said with a lecturing face.

“I’m not the asshole here. Neither is she. I’m stating what I need from her. That’s it. That doesn’t make me the bad guy.”

“It doesn’t… not.” Steve bobbed his head side to side in thought. Eddie stared with a deadpan expression back at him. “Look, you’re asking her to do the one thing she can’t. That’s the issue. If you can't get past that then you need to tell her and drop it. End it. Completely.”

“But I love her, I don’t want to lose her.”

“You can’t have both.”

“Yes, I can. She’ll say it.”

“At least stop being an asshole to her in the meantime then? Just treat her like she’s your friend.”

“I can’t. If I’m around her I'll give in. I can’t act like she’s just my friend anymore I don’t know what that feels like. I’ve loved her for months now and I don’t know how to act.”

“Sounds like a you problem.”

“Now you’re being a dick.” he grumped at Steve.

“Yeah. That was me being a little bit of a dick.” Steve grinned. "Cut me some slack I’m stuck in the middle of you two. It’s not fun for you? Imagine how much it sucks for me to have to hear you both bitching and moaning?”

“Nothing about this is fun.”

“No shit,” Steve said sarcastically. “Love hurts, man. It sucks. It’s also the best thing that exists. It’s…” he sighed.

“Yeah. I know what you mean now.”

“First time, huh?”

“Yeah,” Eddie grumbled.

“I don’t have any happy metaphor for you man. My first love ended in flames. I won’t bullshit you.”

“I appreciate it.”

“Then don’t accuse me of sleeping with your…girlfriend…person situation.”

“Sorry about that.”

“Yeah, you should be.” Eddie sulked. “You’re a good guy.” Steve slapped his arm. “But even good guys can be assholes sometimes.”

“Not an asshole.”Eddie lilted, raising his head, his mood lighter but not chipper by any means.

“You’re not… not an asshole.” Steve clarified.

Thursday was awkward. Eddie felt like an idiot after what he’s said the day before. But Star braved his misplaced anger and sat with them anyway. If anything, she could use spite to be brave even if she was still hurt and sad. Eddie was apologetic with his eyes. They didn’t say much, but the intensity was certainly more tolerable. The group conversation flowed with no issue this time, Eddie answering like a sane person and Star doing the same. They exchanged a few words and kept it civil. She felt hopeful.

At the end of the day when Star shut her locker, she jumped at the appearance of Eddie after the door moving gave away his approach.

“Shit!” she squeaked and grabbed her bag. “You scared me,” she said, looking down immediately.

“I didn’t mean to,” he muttered, hands shoved into his pockets.

She stood with her face downward, fingers picking at the yarn in the strap of her bag, her eyes turned upward to meet his. She didn’t say anything, she didn’t know what to say.

“I wanted to apologize for what I said yesterday. At lunch.”

“Okay.” she nodded slowly, eyes wandering again.

“I saw you two in town that night and you looked… awfully cozy together.” he groaned out, eyes now losing their bravery as he too looked away.

“I was drunk. You know how I get,” she answered quietly, but the tone wasn’t lost on Eddie’s ears. I was drunk because of you, is what she’d wanted to add.

“Yeah.” he kicked at the linoleum floor with his sneaker.

“We didn’t do anything. Not that you’d have any right to be mad at us if we did." Eddie tilted his head and his nose twitched.

“I think I would have the right,” he muttered.

“You essentially told me to fuck off,” she stated plainly. “Or do you not remember storming out and saying you were done with my bullshit?”

“That’s not what I said.”

“It’s burnt into my memory because I’ve been crying about it for days, I’m pretty fucking sure that’s what you said.” she hissed back.

“Then that’s not what I meant! Okay?” he said back with the same defensive attitude she had.

“Then what did you mean?” the snarky attitude she was giving him wasn’t helping their situation.

“I meant…” he lowered his voice. “That whenever you were ready to give me the validation I needed to hear that I’m here. I didn’t mean I’m done with you, like, totally. I..” he groaned and sighed. “I love you, I don’t want you being with anyone else,” he mumbled, eyes paranoid and seeing if anything else was around to hear. “I meant I was done with… that conversation. There was no point in fighting more about it. It wouldn’t have helped.” he added with his exhaustion showing through.

“And I still can’t give you that,” she said entirely annoyed with herself and the situation, but Eddie took it for her not caring. He felt like a dagger had been shoved in between his 4th and 5th rib. “I’m sorry,” she added quietly. “I’m… trying,” she whispered, less angry as she saw the hurt in his body language. “I don’t know how to do this. I’ve never done this… felt this before. I’m not... equipped to deal with this level of shit.”

“So what we have is shit now?” he blurted out.

“No.” she whimpered, “You know that’s not what I meant.” she huffed and closed her eyes.

“That’s what you just said.” he bit back.

“Shit as in the overwhelming amount of emotions I’m having. Everything little fucking thing is triggering the hell out of me!” she admitted with a crack in her voice.

Eddie didn’t say anything, he sighed in response. They stood in painful silence for a moment.

“Well, I’m gonna go. This clearly isn’t going anywhere. I wanted to say sorry for accusing you of sleeping with Steve. And I did. What I said still stands. When you want to give this a real try, and man up to how you feel then come talk to me. Otherwise…we’re just going to argue.” he threw his hands up.

She didn’t respond as he turned and walked away. She felt the exhaustion hit her all over again. She missed him so much. She missed how he used to bring her comfort and not pain. She was sick and tired of feeling sick and tired. Something had to give.

Star was dehydrated she’d cried so much. She thinks if she tried again dust might come out of her eyes. She was drained. So she did what she knew, and sat at her kitchenette, her cards in her hands.

“Alright. Hit me with it.” she sighed.

The Star reversed slapped onto the table.

Star let out the first laugh she’d had since the argument.

“Yeah.” she let out a deep breath. “Fuck me, right?” she snorted and chuckled, rubbing her face. “Okay… Two card pull here.“ She says aloud, another shuffle. “If I tell him I’m in love with him. If I let myself be vulnerable enough to very likely fucking up... What’s gonna happen?”

The Lovers.

Star rolls her eyes and pulls another card.

10 of cups.

“If I had a dollar every time I pulled that when I asked you about him.”

“Then maybe you should fucking listen, you dumb bitch.” She heard in her head and laughed again.

“It’s too good to be true though. But… every time.” she tapped the 10 of cups card. “Is he really it?” she whispered, holding up The Lovers card. “Did you really send me a soul mate?” her face was sad, tired at even the thought of the effort it’d take for her to digest such a weighted statement. “Okay, so if I don’t tell him? At this point... why pull these? You’re going to hand my ass to me.” she slapped down a card.

Two of swords.

“Yeah, no shit.” she cringed.

Five of cups.

“Ugh.” she leaned away from the table, concerned. “Fuck.” she frowned and looked around as if something was going to jump out at her. “Tell me how you really feel.” she slumped back in the booth. She lovingly put the cards that had just rode her hard and put her up wet into their velvet holder. She sat, elbows on the table, chin on her hands, looking out the window. She wasn’t being left with a choice. Not if she was going to grow and change. What Eddie had said had hurt. Deeply. She wasn’t denying that there was truth to it though. How long was she going to stay like this? She wasn’t happy. It wasn’t working. And according to the cards she’d handed a gift she was shunning. So of course her life was going to shit. She had to adjust. She’d extend the olive branch, she’d figure out how to tell him. Somehow.

So then came Friday. She wore her Hellfire shirt, the same as the rest of them and Eddie was visibly tense. More so than usual before a session. She could feel it coming off him from where he sat at the table adjacent to her. Lunch was civil enough again. She hoped he wasn’t as angry as he had been the previous afternoon. She stopped him, waiting him out to be the last two to leave the table.

“Eddie?” she asked, his back facing her as he was walking away. His eyes screwed shut at the way she said his name. Man, he missed that.

“Yeah?” he asked, turning, his shoulder shifting with anxiety.

“I just wanted to say I’m really looking forward to Hellfire tonight,” she said with a subtle smile.

“You are?” he met her eyes, surprised.

“Yeah. I was looking forward to it as a distraction at the least. I’m sure you’ve come up with something brutal. Plenty of… fuel for that sort of thing.” she laughed nervously, tucking her hair behind her ear.

“I’ve put a lot of time into it this week,” he confirmed with a small nod.

“I was looking forward to seeing you too.” she offered, losing her nerve halfway through the sentence and looking away.

“Yeah?” a hint of hope in his upturned voice.

“Yeah.” she nodded chewing her lips. “I mean, it’s weird not seeing you. Talking to you.” she quietly added.

“Yeah.” was all he was managing to say. “I’ll see you tonight then.” he nodded and turned away. It wasn’t the warmest of interactions but it helped fuel Star’s optimism.

So she showed up early to Hellfire. She hoped to extend that olive branch. To show him she was trying. She wanted so badly to move past whatever this was that they were stuck in. If could just get through to him she was certain things could get closer to normal.

“Hey,” she said with bright eyes and a hesitant smile as Eddie was putting out the grid and making his control center.

“H-hey,” he said looking around, then to his watch seeing she was early. He hadn’t expected her to be early or alone.

“I thought I’d come early to talk.” she hesitantly stepped farther into the room. “Is that okay?”

“I mean… you’re doing it so…” he shrugged, anxious about her appearance. He saw the dejected look on her face at his response.

“I was hoping I could maybe… extend an olive branch, you know? I hate this weird disconnect, this animosity between us. I know it’s not good for anything, especially the campaign.”

“Yeah I’d been thinking about that.” he stood still and rubbed the back of his neck.

“I wanted to say that I get where you’re coming from, you know? I was hoping you had had time to think and see things from my point of view too. So maybe we could go back to talking to each other like…not like we used to but more like normal.”

“Star…” he sighed, and rest his hands on the table in front of him. “I said what I said. If you’re not ready, I can’t.” he saw the lump in her throat, and the shine in her eyes grow.

“I’m trying to meet you halfway. I’m trying. I want you to see that I’m trying.”

“Trying isn’t doing, sweetheart.” he shook his head.

“Don’t call me that,” she whispered, wiping away a tear before it fell. “Not like that.”

“I’m not trying to be difficult,” he said in an exhale.

“That’s good to know because it feels that way,” she admitted with a soft laugh, rolling her eyes and sniffling. “You have to try to do. And you being so cold and distant is making it harder. I can’t respond with love when I don’t feel it back.”

“You’ve been feeling it for months. It’s there. It’s just... I’m having a hard time too.” he admitted.

“Then we could make it easier on each other by trying to be normal again.” she offered with upturned hands.

“I can’t do that, Star.” he rubbed his face. “I’ll go back on what I said if I do.”

“And that’s SO terrible?” she snapped, covering her face after the outburst to hide the way it contorted with a building sob. “It’s so hard to see you and not be able to be myself,” she whispered, sniffling.

“Then maybe you should go?” he said calmly, his eyes sad as he looked up to find hers full of tears. “We’re both still emotional about this and I don’t want it to affect the session. It’s not fair to everyone else.”

“You don't want me in Hellfire?” her voice broke and her lip quivered.

“I mean you’re crying already and we’re not even fighting. It’s going to make you play poorly. It’ll distract me. Maybe sit this out until you figure your shit out?” he shrugged.

“Y-” she choked and stopped, looking away. “Fine.” she bit back, tears now proud on her cheeks. “I don’t see how I’m supposed to want to be with you when you’re picking this game over me.” she motioned to the table.

“Star, That’s not-”

“If you say that’s not what you mean one more time I’m going to fucking scream.” she hissed in a loud whisper. “Start saying what you mean instead of backtracking and maybe we could get somewhere!” she said fists balled and shaking.

“Maybe you should take your own advice,” he said back, his exterior so calm it made her infuriated. She said nothing, a huff, and a choked sound left her as she turned her heel and ran.

She sobbed in the girl's bathroom. She couldn’t control it. She’d run out of the theatre, and into the far wall of the bathroom where she slid down it into a lump on the floor.

Eddie hit the large wooden table so hard he worried he’d hurt his hands. He hadn’t meant to be so angry still. He was so cold. Too cold. She was trying but he couldn’t meet her in the middle. All he had was his word, and if he went back on what he said he’d do then his word would be nothing. He slammed himself into the throne, covering his face and groaning into his hands.

Dustin and his insatiable curiosity followed the sound of crying into the girl's bathroom. He hadn’t expected to find Star there, hiccuping as she was crying so hard. She met his eyes as he appeared, lip trembling before a cry broke from her throat, a wail that quietened only when she shoved her face into her sweater to dampen the sound.

“Holy shit, Star. What’s wrong? Are you okay?” he ran, sliding on his knees on the tile floor toward her.

“No.” she sobbed.

“Do I need to call an ambulance? The police? I’ll go get Eddie.” he began to rise and her hand shot to jerk him back into the floor so fast he was startled.

“No.” she said, wiping her face and raising her head. “He’s why I’m crying.”

“What’d he do? I’ll kick his ass.” he meant it and it broke Star out of her self-hating cycle.

“It’s my fault too.” she shook her head.

“I’ve never seen you like this, man. This isn’t normal. This seems like his fault.” he put his hand on her arm.

“We had a fight.”

“Oh.” he grimaced.

“Yeah.” she let out a wild-sounding laugh. “He kicked me out of Hellfire,” she said, looking at him and trying to stop her sobbing.

“He fucking WHAT?” he shouted.

“I tried to make amends. But he didn’t wanna hear it. He told me if I wasn’t there to apologize and do what he said that I shouldn’t come back. That me being there was too much of a distraction for him.”

“Eddie said that? Shit.”

“I fucked up, Dustin.” she whispered, shaking her head.

“Nothing could warrant him kicking you out of Hellfire.”

“Maybe it does.” she shifted and leaned against the wall, her eyes far away and unfocused.

“What happened?”

“I don’t know if he’d want me to say.”

“C’mon. Let me help.” his eyes were so kind, and his hand was so warm and comforting as he rubbed her arm. Star took a deep breath.

“He told me he loved me. But I couldn’t say it back. Even though I do. With the parole thing and the abuse from before I just… I’m having a really hard time. He got mad and told me I was a coward. And he’s right.” her lashes fluttered and she sniffled, wiping her face. “He told me he was done. Until I was ready to say it back he didn’t want anything to do with me.”

“He’s being a fucking asshole,” Dustin stated plainly. “I don’t know what’s wrong with him.”

“He’s right though. It happened over the weekend and I’ve been thinking a lot you know. And I thought that by coming here tonight I could start to make amends. But he…” her lip trembled and she whined, wiping her face again. “Don’t tell him any of that, please. I don’t want him more mad at me.” she grabbed Dustin's jacket and looked desperately into his eyes.

“I won't. I won’t. Don’t worry. I’m going to talk to him though.”

“I don’t know. I thought maybe I could do it you know. Stop listening to my ex’s voice in my head and maybe I could be with someone. Maybe I was worthy of it. But now he’s making me feel like I was right all along. That I’m not. Why can’t I just fucking say it back? It makes me feel like the world’s gonna end if I do. I hate it so much.” another sob grew.

“Star you’re a badass.” Dustin grabbed her face and shook it, her eyes went large from surprise. “You’re great. You’re a good person, you’re a great friend. I know you’d be a great girlfriend. You practically are Eddie’s girlfriend already. He’s just being a dick right now and I’m sorry. He’s a sensitive guy. I think he’s just acting out because he’s hurt too. But he needs to realize he’s not the boss. He can’t just demand things from you.”

“Thanks,” she mumbled from squished cheeks. “He was really mean tonight.” she whimpered.

“You should go home. I’ll talk to him. You shouldn’t have to be here while you’re this upset.”

“Okay,” she said meekly and it broke Dustin’s heart. She truly was defeated.

“Is there anything you want me to say to him? I can relay a message since he wasn’t willing to listen to you. I’ll make him fuckin’ listen.” he said angrily.

“Yeah I made him some things,” she muttered and dug through her bag. Dustin's shoulders slumped, seeing the formerly strong girl broken down to next to nothing in front of him. “I mean you can have it.” she handed a large cookie to Dustin, wrapped in plastic cling film. “It’s his favorite,” she whispered.

“It’s a D20.” Dustin grinned, hard icing tracing out numbers on its surface.

“I thought it was cute. He likes the hard icing.” she swallowed audibly. “I thought if I made him something he’d see I cared.” her bottom lip trembled.

“I’m so sorry he was such a dick.” Dustin looks at her with pity and she hated it but she needed it.

“I know.” she nodded, wiping her face and sitting up straight. “I also made him this but I wanted to give it to him myself. I don’t know if he’ll talk to me.” she shook her head and held out a cassette. “Don’t open it. There’s a letter inside for him. It’s… personal.”

“I won’t. Promise,” he says holding her hands as she extended it to him. “I’ll make him take it. And promise me he’ll read it. Okay? It’ll be okay.” he promised her with a nod and crooked smile.

“Thanks, Dustin. I don’t know that I deserve all this but thank you.”

“Don’t listen to him right now. He’s just hurt. He’s a stubborn dick when he’s got his feelings hurt.” Dustin rolled his eyes. “You go home and rest okay? I’ll handle this.”

“Thanks. You’re a really good guy. A really great friend. I mean it.”

“Shush, I know.” he grinned and stood, holding his hand out to help her up. “Let’s get you out of here.”

“What’s your fucking problem you absolute dick head?” Dustin strutted into the Hellfire Club chest first.

“Excuse you?” Eddie said with high brows.

“He kicked Star out of Hellfire.” he stood and declared it to the group, jerking his seat back and not taking his eyes off Eddie. He wanted him to be publicly shamed.

“You what?”

“What the fuck dude?”

“She was really good!” all came in a chorus of annoyed members.

“Shut up!” Eddie screeched and everyone leaned away, surprised. “That’s not what happened. You shouldn’t be throwing around accusations when you don’t know what you��re talking about.” Eddie gritted through clenched teeth.

“I do know. I just talked to her. I found her crying in the bathroom because of you, you asshole.” Dustin was pissed, and Mike was side-eyeing him, impressed and also scared at what Eddie might do. “She came here trying to make amends.” he raised his voice at the glaring man opposite him at the other end of the table, now standing with his hands on the table. Dustin looked at the group. “They had a big fight over the weekend, that’s why she’s been so weird and Eddie’s been such a pain in the ass,” he announced to the other members, meeting their eyes as they nodded and groaned, now understanding. “She brought you this.” she tossed the cookie down the table and it slid to a stop in front of Eddie. “But you were too busy being mean for her to give it to you.” It split on impact, and he looked just as sorry as he felt at that moment. “It’s your favorite.” Dustin spits out.

“Did she tell you what happened?” he asked, now less boisterous. Eyes not leaving the rifted cookie.

“No. She said you fought. She wanted to respect your privacy even after you were a grade-A piece of shit to her tonight.” He crossed his arms. The exact comment hit Eddie like a knife. That’s what he’d called her ex. That’s what he said he wasn’t. Shit. “I’m here to play. But this isn’t over. I’m talking to you after this.” he pointed his finger angrily at Eddie.

“She would’ve been a distraction from the campaign.”

“C’mon.” Gareth, to everyone's surprise, groaned. “So you and your girlfriend had a fight. Put on your big girl panties and deal with it.” Gareth gave a much-needed pushback to Eddie’s stubborn stance. “She’s a member of this party. We get a say in who comes and goes. You’re the DM, you aren’t God.” he sassed back and Eddie blinked with a blank face. “I’m here to play too. But this is about D and D, not your feelings.”

“Okay then. She can come back next session.” Eddie raised his hands in defeat.

“If she’ll come back.” Jeff says with a more subtle lecturing look toward Eddie.

“If she doesn’t I’m gonna be so pissed at you, dude,” Gareth says with a shake of his head. “Her stats were just getting good,” he mumbled.

“Fine!” he slapped the table to break the subject. “Let’s get this fucking going.” he said loudly as he plopped back into his throne.

The session was fine, Eddie went a little too hard on them but no one fought him about it. They understood why.

Dustin sat in his chair with his arms crossed, waiting for everyone else to clear out.

“So?” he says with a sassy bob of his head. “Since when do you make girls cry, huh?”

“I didn’t mean to. Not really. I might’ve gone a little too hard on her.” he said, sitting on the tabletop beside the judging younger guy.

“A little? She was hiccuping on the bathroom floor from crying so hard. That’s not you being “a little too hard” on her.” Dustin scowled and use air quotes.

“I couldn’t have her here tonight. I wouldn’t be able to think straight. I’m a fucking mess about all this. Is that what you want to hear?”

“YES!” he screeched, his arms going up in the air. “Maybe if you’d brought this kind of honesty, to begin with we wouldn’t be having this conversation!” Eddie rolled his eyes and slumped, his hands on the edge of the table by his thighs. “Look, she gave me this,” he said pulling out a cassette and Eddie’s brow lowered in surprise and hesitation. “I told her I’d give it to you and I told her I’d make you promise to listen to it. She said there’s a letter in it.” he held it out and Eddie took it, looking it over. “She’s really sorry. I’ve never seen her like that, man she was fucked up over you. She really loves you, Eddie.” Eddies eyes snapped to Dustin's.

“She said that?” his voice gave away a certain desperation.

“Yes.” Dustin leaned forward and nodded.

“Then she should say it to me. Why is she saying it to you?” he deflected again, back to brooding.

“Well, she’s not in love with me so I don’t think those two things are comparable.” Dustin snarked.

“I just want her to tell me,” he whispered and Dustin softened his approach.

“She would if you’d give her the chance. She said some super depressing stuff about her ex. She’s still really messed up from that, you know.”

“And how long am I supposed to just wait and act like I’m not in pain every time I’m around her? Huh? It physically hurts to be around her I love her so much.” he gritted out, still looking angry despite the soft subject. “And I know she loves me. She did everything but say it when she was drunk. She even said she feels it but can’t say it. What the fuck does that even mean?” he groaned and hung his head.

“I think you’re being selfish,” Dustin said calmly.

“What the fuck, man? Are you hear to make me feel like shit or talk about this?”

“I’m not trying to, you feel guilty and you’re feeling that way all on your own.” he said with a confident turn up of his chin. Eddie turned away and glared at nothing in particular.

“What if I am? Don’t I have the right to? I’ve been the dirty little secret for most of my love life, do I not deserve to hear it if it’s true now? I feel like she’s being selfish by not saying it to me. Because she knows it’s true. She’s being a baby about it.”

“You’re in so deep you don’t even know it.” Dustin chuckled.

“What?”

“You’re in love bad. You’re getting possessive. That’s how being in love goes bad. You think you’re entitled to something from her. You know better.” Eddie glared, unhappy with the truth coming from the little shitty sage. “You’re acting just like one of these assholes that bully us.”

“That is NOT fucking fair.”

“I think if you were honest with yourself you’d agree.” Dustin stood, leaving Eddie to sulk. “Maybe do that meditation stuff she talks about. Really think about it. Listen to what she has to say.” he motioned toward the cassette. “Maybe what you want is right there.” he shrugged, grabbing his bag.

“Unless it’s a recording of her saying she loves me back it’s not.”

“Quit being such a stickler for rules. I can’t believe I’m saying that to you.” he rolled his eyes.

“I said what I needed. I’m sticking to my word!” he said with a pointed finger.

“Rules are made to be broken, man. What can I say? Think of it this way, would you withhold affection from an abused dog?”

“That’s a messed up comparison, Henderson,” he said feeling defensive of Star.

“No! Hear me out. A stray shows up and it’s scared right, it's clearly been abused by someone before. Do you get mad when the dog snaps or cries or runs away? No. You understand that it has to learn that YOU won’t hurt it. YOU have to be in control and not get mad and hit it when it snaps or growls. You have to be patient with it.” he chopped his hands at Eddie. “Star had a bad owner before. He taught her she was bad and wrong and to expect to be hit. And how are you fixing that point of view for her right now by doing this?”

“It’s not the same.”

“Is it not?” Dustin said with a low brow, his head tilted and a tone full of disappointment. “You show her you love her by loving her, dude. It’s that simple. You can't demand she all of the sudden open up after she’s been told that opening up is the worst thing that she could do. Do you get it? She’s scared. That’s why she was such a tough nut to crack when she first showed up. You see how much she’s changed. If you’d keep supporting her like you have, she’ll be able to change. Just like she has with other stuff.”

Eddie looked away, not knowing what to say because he knew the child genius was right.

“It’s Psych 101 man.” Dustin continued to rub salt into the wound with his words.

“Okay! Fine. I get it. Shit, man.”

“No shame in being wrong. You can apologize,” he said walking back towards the door. “I’m looking forward to telling you I told you so!” he called out as he walked out of the room.

Eddie snarled, his nose wrinkled as he glared at the cassette. He put it in his bag and went on to put away everything else before heading home.

The tape mocked him that next day. He went to band practice, ran errands, and ignored it. He was now mad at himself and not just her. He smoked himself stupid and fell asleep. If he’d had more money he would’ve added some drinking to the mix. He hadn’t felt so emotionally drained in years.

He woke up sweaty, Wayne was already asleep, back from work in the living room. The sounds of the first frogs he’d heard since summer ended were croaking in the puddles around the trailer park. He shut his window, taking his comforter with him across the room. He sat back down on his bed and his bag sat there looking back at him.

“Okay.” he sighed and stood, still dramatic even alone. “Let’s do this.”

He took his portable radio and sat with it on the bed, plugging his headphones into it. He opened the cassette with its pink broken heart on the front and a letter, folded up tumbled out. He saw the label on the cassette, C120, and became more interested. This was two full hours of music. She’d put work into this. What he didn’t know was that she’d been working on it for days, from the time she got home to her falling asleep listening to the radio for inspiration. She’d put her heart and soul into the flimsy plastic rectangle.

He snapped the tape in and unfolded the sheet of paper. One side was simply a tracklist. It was written out beautifully in ink, he’d always admired how pretty her handwriting was with its loops and leans. The other side was a simple message.

“We know I’m not good at saying these things. The songs can say it better than I ever could. Listen to the lyrics. Please. I hope they tell you all you need to know.”

Another chunky square had fallen out of the squeezed-in paper. He dug around it, unfolding the intricate bends. He saw a flash of orange. He pulled out the Get Out Of Jail Free Card he’d given her. He cracked a smile, feeling a hint of tears in his eyes. He’d practically forgotten. On the inside of the paper around it, concealing it until he took he time to open it was also simply stated.

“Forgive me.”

He sighed, looking at the card, he put it to his mouth, tapping it against his lips in thought. It even smelled like her. He wondered where she’d been keeping it all this time. He had to play by the rules of the card. He had to forgive her. She’d held onto his silly little gift and remembered it this whole time. He owed her for the sentimentality it showed in the gesture. She really did love him, didn’t she?

Eddie clicked the tape on, mouth dry and fingers fidgeting on the edges of the paper. Looking over the track list it was apparent that this mix was not for him. It wasn’t music catering to him, it wasn’t metal or thrash or a collection of songs he liked. It was all songs that were distinctly Star. He could feel her in the choices. First, a gut punch of nostalgia with Fleetwood Mac. He recalled her singing and dancing, how he’d spent so much time learning new songs just for her. And she was always appreciative of each one. Even if he didn’t quite get every chord just right. A throwback to an evening with Wayne with her favorite Dion song.Then Maggie May. She memorized every song and every emotion attached. He felt a little nauseous, she had remembered. She’d remembered that post-Valentine’s night this whole time. Moving out of nostalgia he listened to songs that spoke to him directly in the lyrics. Stumblin’ In, Right Down the Line, I Saw the Light. They all told him what he needed to hear. He sat there, unmoving for hours. He rewound and listened to some over, he read her letter again. He finally laid back, Otis Redding in his ears. He looked to the window and the sun was up, he didn’t even know for how long. He stared at the stain on his ceiling, hand to his chest, hearing Star tell him how much she truly did love him through someone else’s words.

“But it seemed so natural darling, that you and I are here. Just talking over cigarettes and drinking coffee. And oh, my whole heart cried out love at last I’ve found you. And honey won't you just let me build my whole life around you?” he let the tears fall. Finally. The warm brass sounds pulled them out of him. He wiped them away, but not denying their existence this time. He sat up, switching off the tape, his ears suddenly cold from being housed in his headphones for hours. He put the papers in his bedside table, somewhere to keep them safe and close to his other prized possessions. He snapped the tape back into the case and put it into his bag. He stretched and took a deep breath, shaking off the anger he’d felt before. He had to go to her. He‘d forgive her and he could take it slow. Music was a love language for Eddie. It was also Star’s. By showing him in a way he could hear and feel, she’d been able to get through to him. He could feel she did love him. There couldn’t be lyrics like that that resonated with her if she didn’t love him. For her, he would try to be patient. He would apologize. He’d probably have to beg and maybe deservedly so. For her, he’d do anything.

Eddie had jumped into the shower, leaving without a word to Wayne, speeding to Star’s house with the tape in the console. To his dismay, she wasn’t there. No one was. Everything was locked and shut. He took the key he had, and let himself in her trailer, there was an old suitcase out, and a letter on the countertop.

“Shit. That’s tomorrow,” he whispered. The parole hearing. “Fuck.” he shouted out in frustration. They’d left early. He’d missed her. Being back in her space made the last words he’d said there smack him in the face. He’d promised her he’d be there for her for that. He felt another wave of nausea. “Oh god I really am an asshole.” he whispered.

Wayne was awake when Eddie returned, another morning just like the last, sipping his coffee on the front porch. He was no stranger to Eddie driving like a maniac. But Eddie leaping from the van and stumbling up the stairs was new.

“You okay?”

“I'm going to Chicago.” he said before disappearing into the house.

“What in the Sam Hill?” Wayne muttered as he followed him inside. “Now?” he followed Eddie to his bedroom, dumping the school contents of his backpack onto the bed and shoving things he’d need for a long drive in. “I didn’t think ya’ll would head out until later, maybe leave before dawn tomorrow.”

“Yeah, neither did I. I’ve been so caught up in being mad at her that I forgot. I didn’t forget I just… I didn’t think about it.”

“So that’s why she’s not been here and you’ve been sulking.” he nodded and took a drink.

“Yeah. We had a big fight. And she wrote me a really sweet letter and apologized and I’m seeing that I’m the asshole in this situation.” he shook his head, scoffing at himself. “I didn’t get it until this morning and I went to her place to apologize and she’s gone. So… I’m going to Chicago.”

“Do you know where to go?”

“I know the name of the prison. I can figure it out.”

“I'll grab a map.” Wayne said, calm amongst Eddie’s chaos. Eddie soon bound into the living room with his bag on his shoulder. “Here.” he handed Eddie a folded-up map. “Just in case.”

“Thanks. I’ll be back sometime Monday afternoon I think. I’ll call if I need to.”

“Take this too,” he said with a fatherly tone, holding out a 50-dollar bill to him. Eddie stared at it for a moment.

“No way, that’s too much. I don’t need that.”

“Take it.” he shook it at him.

“No, that’s too much Wayne, I’ve got gas money, I’m fine.” he insisted. Wayne took it and shoved it into his boy’s pocket.

“You say thank you when people give you things, Eddie. I raised you better than that.”

“Thank you.”

“That’s better.” he grinned and fixed Eddie’s collar. “Mind your manners when you find her, alright?”

“I will.” he nodded. “I”m gonna fix this. I’m gonna come back with her. It’ll be okay. It’ll work. Like you said. Me and her we’re… we’re supposed to be together.”

“C’mere.” Wayne said bringing him in for a hug. Eddie felt small in his father figure’s arms. They didn’t NOT hug, but it wasn’t a daily occurrence by any means. Eddie hugged him back, slow on the draw. Wayne pat his back. “You’re a good man. You’ll figure it out. Plenty of time on the drive to figure out how to beg her forgiveness.” he grinned at him, pulled away, and slapped his shoulder supportively.

“Yeah. Lots of that.”

“You be careful.” he wagged a finger at him. “And remember what I taught you about women. Don't make me look bad.” his tone was serious but he said it with a smile.

“I won’t let you down.” a promise to his uncle and himself.

“You never do.”

Eddie drove with Star’s tape blasting, shaking the metal of the van for hours. He cried, screamed, and talked to himself. The long hours of the highway gave him plenty of time to playback everything everyone around him had been saying. He could eat the I told you so’s with a smile if it meant having her back and happy again. He hoped his ego hadn't done irreparable damage.

He drove for hours in the city, finding the prison then seeing the parking wasn’t 24 hours. So he went on another adventure to find overnight parking somewhere. He figured a parking garage with a security guard at the gate was the safest bet to not get carjacked. He took a short walk, some blocks to find a place to eat. He took it back to the van where he played her tape at a much lower volume in his portable stereo not wanting to drain the van battery too much. He ate what might’ve been the best pizza of his life and talked to himself for hours. He had a method to his madness. He practiced apologizing, going over what he might say when he saw her. He tried to cover every retort and response he could think of.

Star had one place in mind she wanted to go upon returning to Chicago. She was someone Star’s mom had liked. She was part of the reason her name was Star. Robbie waited outside, not willing to leave Star alone or get involved with any of her hippy-dippy shit. His words.

The place smelled like incense and years of cigarettes. It smelled like home to Star. Through beaded curtains and shimmery drapes, she walked down the floor of stairs and into the small business.

“Would it be to cliche to say I was expecting you?” An older woman with wise eyes and a welcoming demeanor sat at her small round table. The entire space was covered in jewel tones and occult paraphernalia. The neon sign with a palm and the word psychic across the top buzzed and gave a glow to the sacred space.

“Just a little.” Star smiled and was welcomed into the arms of the woman. She was someone she’d sought out during hard times for guidance, especially after her mom had passed. She was a big part of who Star was now.

“Are you okay? I thought you were running when you left? Oh, wait no don’t answer that. You know I like a challenge.” She said spiritedly with her long layers of skirts and shawls flowing with animated arms. “Is this business or pleasure?”

“Both as always.” Star sighed contently and sat in the worn thatch chair across from the whimsical woman.

“Do you want your cards?”

“No, I’ve been doing them a lot and they’ve been very rude.” Star chuckled.

“You’ve kept up your studies?” The woman perked up at the news.

“I’ve never been more into them.”

“But?”

“I still need guidance.”

“Are the cards not clear?”

“Too clear. I kinda wanted to see what my guides had to say. I’m not good at tuning into them and certainly not like you can.”

“They’re annoyed.” She laughed. “Proud and annoyed.”

“Can’t blame them. Things have been weird lately. I’ve been struggling.”

“They’ve been trying to take care of you.” She looked around the room at times and others shut her eyes. Star sat amidst a realm she couldn’t touch yet. “But you’re fighting it. They don’t like being ignored when they work so hard to reach out.”

“I should say it shouldn’t I?” A question vague enough for the woman to not know what she meant. But her guides did.

“A resounding yes.” She nodded. “I’m seeing… two things?” She tilted her head, her eyes narrowing as she tried to see something more clearly. “Whatever these two things are they’re okay. Oh, it’ll be okay. You’ll be okay.”

“Good news.”

“They’re showing me…” she held out her two hands as if she were weighing something. “A good thing and a bad thing. They’re not being very clear sorry.”

“Outcomes?”

“No.” She paused.

“Oh, men.” Star nodded. “A good man and a bad man.”

“They seem to be happy with that answer.” “One is being tossed over the shoulder and forgotten. The other..” she giggled. “The other they're acting like they’re kissing something in their hand.” Star laughed.

“Eddie.” She grinned.

“Oh, they like him.” The woman laughed. “Tell me more about this Eddie.” She leaned in like a gossip. “There’s a man in your life already? So soon.” She seemed happy but curious.

“I said the same. I thought he was too good to be true.”

“Smart girl.” She nodded her hand to her chin. “You can ask them about him. They’re open to it.” Star pondered for a moment.

“I know the cards have told me I should be with him. Soul connections and whatnot. We’ve channeled each other before. It’s very intense. Is that all true?”

“There’s a box with a bow. Like a Christmas present.”

“I don’t know.”

“Oh! He’s a gift!” She laughed, amused.

“But am I the same for him? Or am I a lesson for him?”

“Don’t shoot the messenger but I’m being told to tell you to not be stupid.” Star snorted out a laugh.

“I’m trying.” She sighed. “So I should go against all my instincts and go balls deep, deep end of the pool with Eddie? Full in love and believing in soul mates and all that?” Star didn’t look convinced.

“Oh hello, darling.” The woman cooed. Star sensed she wasn’t talking to her. “Yes. Live the life I couldn’t.” The woman sighed. “She was always so sweet, wasn’t she? She loved you so much. Still sacrificing even now to give you good things.” Star softly smiled.

“I miss her.” Star pouted unintentionally.

“She knows.” a warm smile and nod from her mentor to ease her fear.

“I’ll do it for her, I’ll believe in fairy tales.” Star huffed out an uncomfortable laugh and wiped at her cheek.

“Believe in yourself.” The woman confidently said. “Open up your heart. That’s where your higher self is.”

“And becoming my highest self is the goal of this trip, this realm.”

“What scares you most shows you where you need to grow the most. You’re still cynical. For good reason, my dear but letting go of that and trusting the universe will care for you is the next step.”

“Hard to take the next step when you can’t see the stairs” Star sighed and stared at nothing.

“That’s why love is blind, sweetheart. You don’t have to see the stairs to know it’s there.”

Eddie set his watch for dawn, not knowing when to expect Star. So, he was going into the prison lot as the workers were. He parked out of the way, not wanting to draw attention to himself. Just being at a prison made him nervous. He thought the weird metal guy sitting in his van alone was suspicious enough, it’d be worse to stand at the gate and wait or be parked in the middle of everyone else and have them stare him down. Again, he waited hours.

9 am was the start of the parole hearings for the day. Like the prisoners, no one else knew when they would be called. So Eddie waited with burning eyes, watching the entry gate. Eventually, Robbie's truck pulled in. He saw him taking up a good portion of the cab and Star with her head against the window. Unlike the last time she had to speak in front of people she looked like herself today. He watched as they pulled in like him, a little out of the way. Eddie got out of the van. Taking a deep breath and then checking it to see just how bad it was. So a stick of gum was shoved into his mouth at the last second.

Star was feeling numb. Only because she was feeling so much she couldn’t compute it anymore. Robbie held her around her shoulders, half comforting and half making sure she didn’t run. She’d been so quiet the whole ride. The whole night in the hotel. She’d barely eaten and the one thing she missed the most about the city was the food.

Robbie saw Eddie before she did. Even his jaded heart lept a little at the site of the goofy guy. His hands were clenching and unclenching, slowly walking away from the entrance and toward them.

“Star?” Robbie said softly to not startle her.

“I’m fine.” She mumbled, still looking at the ground.

“Star.” he demanded again, this time in a deeper voice.

“What?” She said with a tired voice, looking up at Robbie.

“Look who showed up.” He had such a warm smile on his face Star was gobsmacked. Robbie didn’t smile like that. He nodded his head toward the already very apologetic-looking man tentatively approaching her, almost tripping over his feet as he dragged them.

Star turned with a low brow and her eyes landed locked with Eddie’s as if she’d been aiming for them. She stopped moving, involuntarily. Her face fell, mouth dropping open as he approached. She could swear there was a faint ringing in her ears from the shock. Her breath caught in her throat and she felt a wave of tingly ice move across her skin. Robbie stayed by her side as she shakily took steps forward. A sob erupted from her throat, but for the first time in a long time, it was accompanied by a smile. She took another step, another sob rocking her torso. She held her hands out with no shame in her desperation for Eddie who started jogging towards her, his frightened body language switching seamlessly to caregiver. She picked up her pace, leaving Robbie behind as her knees gave out on impact with Eddie’s chest. He lifted her into a hug, her feet leaving the ground and kicking up. She gripped him with white knuckles and sobbed loudly into his chest. He held her as tightly as he could and pressed his face to her hair. His tears fell then too, he didn’t sob like her but his cheeks were wet in the early light just the same. He held her, letting her sob. Ugly choked gut-wrenching sounds left her small body. It was a release she’d needed desperately.

“Man am I glad to see you.” Robbie said with a hand to Eddie’s arm.

“Wouldn’t miss it.” He smiled back, only his wet lashes giving away he was crying too.

“I told you not to give up on this idiot.” Robbie grinned, rubbing Stars back.

She cried something unintelligible.

“You’re gonna have to use your words, kid. Breathe for a second. It’s fine. Your knight in shining armor is here.” There was no ill will towards Eddie for Robbie. He’d known from the moment Star cried about their fight that he’d come back. Eddie wasn’t a quitter. He knew the guy that much. Everyone has fights, and he knew Star was admittedly hard to love sometimes. But she had people around her that were the same way. When you found your people like that you didn’t give up on them. He knew Eddie was one of their people. First loves were intense and these young fools were no exemption to the rules of messing things up when emotions ran high. Robbie's years of experience told him that with time, the two bumbling goobers he had watched fall in love would be just fine.

“I’m here.” He spoke softly in her ear. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

“M’Sorry.” She blubbered out as he smiled wide at her pitiful little red face. He took his handkerchief out of his pocket and wiped her cheeks then squeezed her snotty nose. She cracked a smile through her quiet tears and took the cloth to clean herself up.

“There she is.” He put his hands to her cheeks. “There’s my pretty girl.” He watched her face screw up into a comedically deep frown as he laughed and kissed her forehead.

“Y-yours?” She shakily breathed in.

“Yes. I’m sorry. Okay? We can talk about it later. Today's about you right?”

Y-yeah.” She nodded.

“Just know I’m here for you, okay? I’m sorry I made you doubt that.”

“Did you get my tape?” She asked with big bright glossy eyes.

“That’s what snapped me out of it. I'm sorry I doubted you. I was just so used to being a secret, a backup plan, a story to tell, you know? But I’m here now. I hope that counts for something.”

“It does.” She said finally losing her quivering voice. “I’ll fight you later, kay?” She gave him a soft smile and she saw a tear fall down his cheek as he beamed down at her, squishing her cheeks and kissing her pooched lips.

“You can hit me with your car if you want, I know you’re good at that.” He joked and got a laugh out of her.

“That would make me feel better.”

“Yeah? It’s a date then.” He kissed her forehead and squeezed her.

“No sex on the first date but murder is okay.” She said into his chest as she felt him warm and laughing around her.

“I missed you so fucking much.” He said pulling her away to kiss her cheek.

“I missed you more.” She admitted with a crooked smile, it and the statement made Eddie’s heart flutter for good reasons now.He kissed her briefly again.

“I’ve got you today alright? Whatever you need I’m your slave. Got it?” He smoothed her hair down and wiped some errant mascara off her cheek.

“Hold my hand and don’t let go until I say.” She stated as her first order. He stood next to her and laced their fingers together. He stood up straight and she mirrors him. He lifted her chin back up.

“Lead the way, boss.” He said with an approving nod, holding his free hand out for her to take the lead.

They sat on the uncomfortable wooden bench outside the room for hours. Star had her headphones on for a good part of it, Eddie sat next to her, only breaking their handhold to put his arm around her and take her hand with his other. She’d fallen asleep on him, he’d been stroking her hair and rubbing her back and she’d fallen into the missed lull of safety only he could bring her. Eddie looked down at her for the longest time, smiling and kissing her head.

The woman across from them watched them with an adoring smile.

“She have to speak against someone too?” She asked, giving the information that she too was there for the same reason.

“Yeah,” Eddie said softly, rubbing Star's arm.

“First time?”

“Yeah.” He nodded again.

“She’s lucky to have you “ she gave a sad smile.

“Nah.” He shook his head and chuckled. “I’m lucky she puts up with me.” He said wholeheartedly.

“You’re the boyfriend then?” The woman grinned. Eddie paused, his mouth open trying to figure out how to answer that.

“He is,” Robbie answered. “More like the husband.” He smirked from behind his magazine. The woman looked over at him in surprise as he joined the conversation. “I’m her older brother.” He added to give context. Eddie had blushed at Robbie's words. “I’m here for moral support since I dealt with her going through this the first time around with her piece of shit ex.”

“Ah yes. Same here. She reminded me of me my first time back here.” She gave Star a sad smile even though she couldn’t see it. “It won’t be so hard next time.” She said kindly, looking to Eddie. “It won’t be easy but there’s a fear that first time.” She shook her head. “You don’t get the same fear after that.” She sighed. “If she can get through putting him in there she can do anything. Remind her of that when she needs it.”

“Thanks,” Eddie said softly to not wake her. “I never know what to say because I can’t relate you know? It’s hard to understand sometimes.”

“Because you’re a man.” The woman chuckled. “No offense, but you can’t understand what it’s like dealing with a man like that unless you’re a woman. There are certain things you just can’t understand. It’s something that makes us different.” She shrugged. “The world is different for us. It’s harder in ways you don’t have to deal with. Just be there for her, listen to her. Believe her.”

“That’s what I plan on doing.” it was Eddie’s turn for a sad smile as he thought about how he’d failed her.

The woman let out a content sigh. A small sign of hope in the young couple.

She came and went before them, Star waking up as the doors opened and the next was called. She’d turned to read the list she’d written. She didn’t know if she’d stick to it, not knowing how she would react when she saw him. But she felt better to have it. There were only bullet points and words on the page, they didn’t make much sense to Eddie. It was funny, it was a list of reminders of the most heinous things he’d done to her. And he couldn’t understand a word of it. He would understand far more than he bargained for very soon.

The next steps ensued, the warning call of the name. Her standing by the door waiting to be let in. Her hand trembled in Eddie’s and he squeezed it tight.

“I’m gonna throw up.” She whispered.

“No, you’re not. You’ve got this.”

“What if I can’t?”

“You can. I know you can. You can do anything.” He meant every word and she felt it.

“You had to put that bastard in there last time,” Robbie said from her other side. “This time he’s already in. You’re just helping keep him there.”

She nodded and took a deep breath. The door started to open.

The funniest thought she had walking into the room to sit at one of three tables in a rather anti-climatic conference room, was that orange looked terrible on him. She wasn’t in any spot to chuckle about it, but seeing him and not feeling fear or conditioned attraction made her feel a huge wave of relief. Part of her was worried she’d fall under his spell as soon as she saw him again. But she stood a little straighter feeling the old her slipping away.

Eddie was flabbergasted at the guy. He didn’t know what he’d expected, but it hadn’t been this. This guy was very possibly the best-looking guy he’d ever seen in real life. He had two realizations, one, he understood why a 16-year-old girl would fall for whatever he said, and two, he looked nothing like Eddie. They both had dark hair, that was it. This man had hair that hit about his ears, swooping back thick and shiny. His eyes were a soul-piercing blue and stood out like some lich king around his dark lashes and brown skin. He had a jaw that could cut glass and a strong nose that suited his intense appearance.

He didn’t look in the guys' direction much, it wouldn’t have mattered anyway, Bobby's eyes were only set on Star.

They all three sat down at a table as his name and charges were read.

“We have Florence Reynolds. The plaintiff in the case that sentenced him to prison.”

Eddie’s brow lowered, confused, and looking at Star who didn’t flinch. He turned to look at Robbie and he nodded. Eddie hadn’t know Star's real name.

There were formalities. Name stating and the relationship to the prisoner. She was asked to stand and did so without stumbling or projectile vomiting across the room. She considered that a win.

“As she said I’m Florence, I go by Star.”

“I always like Flo better.” Bobby smirked.

“Please refrain until she’s done speaking.” The woman who was calling out the formalities said and gave Star the nod to continue.

“I’m Star.” She stated again just for the reason of making him hear it again. “I was the victim of Bobby, as I knew him. He was found to have a narcissistic personality disorder and one we now both share, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. I’ve been in extensive therapy since leaving the violent and manipulative relationship I had with him. My therapist has given me many diagnoses that affect my life every day because of the mental, emotional, sexual, spiritual, and physical abuse I endured while with him. I was only 15 when we met for the first time. A minor and a child. He was over a decade my senior and I believe that speaks to how he chooses his victims. If you let him out he will do it again. I know this because after I left him he did the same thing to one of my peers. He told them I was trying to get back with him and she believed him. That’s how I got the scar on my head, from a brick the girl and her friends hit me with. After a fire was set to the outdoor area of the school where I was knocked unconscious, I got these.” She held up her arm. “I have these and had to go through painful surgeries and physical therapy on top of mental therapy because of this inmate in front of you. I hesitate to call him a man because I don’t believe he’s human after the things he did to me and my family.” She put the paper down and took a deep breath, Eddie put his foot next to hers, she could feel it. She put her hand on the table, fingertips brushing the surface and she felt Eddie’s with its signature cold rings slide into hers. “He will tell you whatever you want to hear to get his way. That's what he does. He can act however the situation calls for. He'll lie and pretend and he’s so good at it that you won’t know it. Which is what I know is happening here. I went from a young teen who wanted nothing more than to be loved and dance with her friends on the weekends. I turned into a shadow of myself, alone and isolated and turning to drugs to make it through the day. He made me need them by tearing me down piece by piece for years and then supplied me with the drugs. He assured that I wouldn’t go anywhere. Control and isolation were his end goals. He framed me for stealing from my brother who knew of the trouble I was in and had warned me from the start about Bobby. But I didn’t listen because Bobby told me everything I ever wanted to hear and made me dependent on him for everything. Before I was able to escape I would be locked in our apartment with no key and no phone. He took my money and at one point my shoes so I couldn’t leave. As I said he made it look like I stole from my brother, both money and material possessions that belong to our mother. Robbie believed him and gave up on me. He thought I was a lost cause. This is what Bobby wanted. I was truly alone. He proceeded to keep me in the apartment after getting me fired from my job. I escaped by smashing a window and leaving via a fire escape. I made my way to Robbie where I told him the truth and seeing the state I was in and that I was sober he believed me. Without him, I wouldn’t have escaped. He had to physically defend me and himself to retrieve a few prized possessions I had left from my apartment, that’s when the original assault charge started. With that, I told everything to the cops, and trauma dumping as they asked me what happened, they took me to the station and asked if I wanted to press charges to which I said yes. I hope you believe me and the court's decision that he isn’t fit for public life. I hope you don’t make the same mistake I did and believe his lies. I hope you don’t force more women to be victims like I was by letting him free.” She nodded and sat, looking at the surface of the table in front of her and breathing through her nose. She’d done it.

“The board will take a recess to make a decision.” Was announced. Bobby was staring, unwavering at Star.

“You’ve looked better, Flo Jo.” The man smirked, spread legs, and sat back in his chair. Star met his eyes, glaring. “Was I so bad I turned you into a dyke? Who is this?” He laughed nodding at Eddie.

“It is a priviledge you get to stay out here while they deliberate. That can be taken away just as quickly.” The woman snapped as the officer standing off the side took a step forward.

“We’re just talkin',” he said with a smug face. Eddie and Star's hands were both shaking now. “This your boyfriend? That’s cute.” He looked them over. “Did she tell you what she told the courts that I did to her?” He asked sucking his teeth. “I didn’t do it of course.” He raised a brow. “But if you’d heard the things she told them you wouldn’t be able to hold her hand right now I’ll tell you that. She’s a dirty… filthy little girl aren’t ya Flo?” He winked.

“Robert! Last chance.” The woman says having the officer approach him.

“Nothing she doesn’t know. Don’t worry. I’m good.” He said with his hands up in cuffs.

With a united front of indifference, they didn’t give him the reaction he was hoping for. Nothing upsets a narcissist more than seeing they don’t have control over you anymore.

“Thank you ma’am it’s fine,” Star said as calmly as a glass lake. “He's trying to get a rise out of me.” She rolled her eyes and blinked lazily.

“You too good now?” He laughed. “You ran away from your home just like you do your problems and you think you’re too good for me now? That it?” He kept it lined with a huff of laughter to not seem angry and stay in the room to try to mess with her. “I hope you’ve your fun with Mr. Trianon over there because once he finds out what you’ve done he’s gone, baby girl.” He threw his head back and laughed. “I don’t know how she’s not the one locked up in here man. She's done some wiiiild stuff with me, my man. She’s a good time. Especially when you get a few drinks in her. I’ll give her that… but save ya some time and let me tell ya, that kitty cat ain’t worth it. If ya catch my drift.” He snickered and leaned into the table, despite being far away. They all three gave him a stone wall in response. They could see him get angrier, nostrils flaring. “You’re really gonna be with that pile of damaged goods?” He went for hurting them both again. “He must be as pathetic as you if he knows how messed up you are and he’s still with you.”

Star raised her hand to the woman who opened her mouth to stop him. “He’ll tire himself out eventually.” Another wave of reddened face from the handcuffed monster.

“You can’t talk to me like that alright? Just because I’m in here. You aren’t better than me now little Flo Jo. These?” He raised his hands in cuffs. “Don’t mean anything alright? They don’t make you right. They don’t make you okay now. Because I know you, Flo. I KNOW you.” He leaned in as far as he could and glared. “And you’re always gonna be that stupid little girl. The one with a sick mommy who can’t do anything right. You were born stupid that’s not your fault.” He lashed out. Star held a finger up as the woman caught on to what was happening. “Your mother was stupid for fuckin around with those queers and gettin' sick. She knew better, and so should you. But it never stopped ya. Your daddy was the only smart one because he got a jimmy free ride off ya mom and left!” He laughed again, deep and menacing, eyes growing slightly erratic.

“When you’ve said the same thing so many times it becomes boring.” Star responded, a perfectly timed yawn appearing afterward.

“There’s the mouth. There’s that smart mouth again, eh?” He nodded. “This guy isn’t hittin' you enough.�� He growled. Star saw the door the deliberations were happening behind start to open and she smiled. “You’ve gotta keep this bitch in line. If not she’ll think she runs the place. She’s got a bad attitude and no respect, you need to remind her of what a little fuck up she is. How everything she’s touched has turned to shit. She’ll take your money, she’ll fuck your best friend then have the nerve to cry about it when you hit her for it. You gotta hold her down and-“

“I think we’ve heard enough to make our decision.” The man speaks as Bobby jumps and turns with wide eyes.

“You’re back just in time. She’s been out here trying to make me mad this whole time! It’s like I said before, check the papers, she’s a lying little snot. She’ll push you to the edge until you pop.” He rushed out to place the blame on anyone else.

“Ms. Reynolds thank you for your time we know this wasn’t easy. We appreciate your candid nature and you’ll be happy to hear we agree with you. The board will not be granted parole. The case will be revisited in 5 years' time.”

“FIVE YEARS? You fucking kidding me with shit?” He shouted as he was being stood up and moved away. “You did this to me Flo! Look what you turned me into! You’re taking a man’s life away here!”

Star stayed sat until he was gone, his voice fading behind a now closed door.

“Thank you.” She said with a nod and stood.

“I'm sorry for him speaking to you like miss. But I believe you knew how he’d respond and it seemed to work in your favor today. I'm glad.” The woman with a very sharp and cold suit said but he eyes were warm.

“Thank you, ma’am. The one good thing to come from all my therapy is I know what makes men like him tick now. It’s not hard to upset them.”

“Good luck. Enjoy the rest of your time in the city. ” She nodded and gathered her files. Onto the next one.

Not a word was spoken as they walked out of the prison. Eddie had so much information thrown at him so quickly he felt like the words were falling out of his ears.

The early afternoon sun hung high but not harshly over the drab grounds of the prison. Star stepped out feeling the familiar wind on her face and in her hair. It was at its longest she couldn’t ever recall it being, a grown-out choppiness with a few of her home-style cuts in the mix. Breaching the gate she walked calmly until she reached Robbie's truck where she slowed to a stop. The two men trailed behind her, letting her set the pace for the next move. Eddie moved beside her to observe but not disrupt. He couldn’t help but be compelled to treat her like she was fragile. She had every right to be. Plus, focusing on her needs let him ignore the avalanche of epiphanies and questions the last hour had brought down on him.

She closed her eyes and took in a chest-rising breath she felt into her toes. A single tear tan down her cheek to meet the corner of her mouth that curled into a smile. Her closed lips were tight before she turned them in to chew at them for a moment. Fluttering her eyes open she released her second audibly exhale. She turned, knowing she should address her support system. She didn’t meet their eyes, mouth opening to speak before she tilted her head, brows rising and falling as she tried to pick which words to come out of her mouth like a ball being plucked from a bingo cage. That’s how her brain felt anyway, rattled and spinning. She didn’t know how she felt, she knew it was good but, it didn’t feel real.

She decided to meet Eddie first, he knew she had on her thinking face. It always made his hands want to mush her cheeks with the way her lips pouted and her nose took on a bunny-like characterization. He mirrored her loss of words, both blinking as if they were trying to remember how to speak.

The silence stretched over a minute. After which Robbie decided to be the adult and guide them in a direction. Any direction.

“You two have a lot to talk about.” Both a factual statement and a jab at how they were looking at each other like fish out of water. He put a hand on both their backs, putting them both into the shade with his large silhouette. “I assume you’re gonna drive back with Eddie?” He asked with a gentle tone.

Star had been looking up at Robbie like she had when she was small and listening to his advice, eyes full of trust and awe. They quickly flicked to Eddie’s as he too looked away and to her.

“I’d like that.” He stuttered out, leaning forward a little nervously. “If you want to. That is.” He nodded and looked away leaning back again with his chin pressed into his neck. This decision came much faster and not to mention easier as she nodded before affirming with words to accompany it.

“Yeah. I’d like that.” She looked down with the same bashfulness and took his hand into hers.

“Are you gonna stay up here a while or get on back?”

“We’ve got school tomorrow we should just get back.”

“Eat first,” Robbie instructed.

“Oh right.” Star became aware of the painful empty feeling in her stomach. For once it was from a physical cause and not an emotional one. “That okay?” She asked Eddie.

“Whatever you want.” He nodded with high brows.

With that Robbie wrapped her up as she smiled into his shoulder.

“Proud of you kid. You should be too.” He kissed her cheek and she pouted, almost tearing up again. “Shush you know I love you don’t make me say it.” He grinned and shoved her shoulder to knock off her balance. With the order to drive safely and not be stupid, Eddie and Star found themselves side by side in his van again. It felt like months they’d been apart. Both scrambled to recall the last time they’d been in his van together.

“You need to talk about it?” He asked before turning on the van. Star shook her head and looked at him with a subtle smile.

“Not yet. I’m still processing it. It’s not hit me yet. Not really. It’s been a hell of a week, I don’t think my brain's caught up yet.” She huffed out a quiet laugh.

“It really has.” They both stared at nothing, eyes out toward the front of the van. “I’m sorry, you know. For… everything. For me and this today and just..” he sighed.

“It’s okay.” She put her hand on his arm. “We have all the time in the world to talk about it now don’t we?” She said with hopeful eyes. He put his hand to hers in his arm. He gave her a smile that showed his dimples and she softened even more. He took her hand into his and kissed it.

“Yeah, we do.” It was a tender moment they both needed. A moment of recognition and reprieve.

“But food first.” Star said seriously then she shifted into a light-hearted smile.

“Of yeah duh, obviously. Food first. Always.”

PART 22

If you enjoyed it, reblogs, likes and comments help IMMENSELY.

Here's the playlist for the mixtape mentioned in the chapter if you're interested.

Tag List:

@kik511999 @banannie255 @paracetamollvr @honeyshiftss @simonsblueee @suspirian @likeficsinthewnd @hollyismentallyillhelpp @eddiesgoodgirl @ouuwitchywoman @michaelfuckinglangdon @hannahdinse8 @thikkiesixx @idyllicbutterfly @lonesome-dovee @kaelyn-lobrutto24 @eriseffigy @kriffingstars @psychedelephantt @laurathefahrradsattelltel @munsins @secularlunarsorceressss @angelofthorrrr @eddiemunsonsbedroom @justiceiswater @unnecesarysstuff @divadinag @boomhauerr @br0ck-eddiee @the-fever-of-mankind @nitafromtheshadows @sammararaven @bambipowerblueadditionaddtion @trixyvixx @bimbobaggins69 @sillypurplemurple @sunnyhoney420 @sugar-bears-smilee @hellfires-harlot

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ethereal27cereal · 2 years

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I posted 2,077 times in 2022

That's 2,077 more posts than 2021!

81 posts created (4%)

1,996 posts reblogged (96%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@wroteclassicaly

@ladyfogg

@thisishellfire

@boomhauer

@littledemondani

I tagged 1,468 of my posts in 2022

Only 29% of my posts had no tags

#eddie munson - 551 posts

#joseph quinn - 428 posts

#reese recs - 366 posts

#eddie munson x reader - 230 posts

#at least my queue is organized - 212 posts

#joe quinn - 181 posts

#queue pew pew - 134 posts

#eddie munson smut - 101 posts

#eddie munson x plus size reader - 97 posts

#writing inspo - 82 posts

Longest Tag: 132 characters

#she’s shy and reserved and he’s constantly doing stuff to annoy her just to bring her out of her shell and see if he can get a smile

My Top Posts in 2022:

Forever, right? - Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader

summary: Eddie has just met your parents, and it went...well...well kind of. With a few words of encouragement and sweet comfort, Eddie has the courage to confess some pretty big feelings and decides the next steps in your relationship. This is a part 2 to Curls but can be read on its own.

warnings: smut 18+ MINORS DNI. established relationship, kissing, breast play, semi-public sex (in Eddie’s van), unprotected p in v sex (wrap it up and be safe 👍🏻), orgasm (m and f), reader is implied as plus size but doesn’t have to be read that way, reader has relationship with both parents, even though they are judgmental and a bit old fashioned, brief mention of criminals and serial killers (nothing graphic), I think that is it but let me know if I missed something.

request: Thank you to the lovely anon who sent me this: i loved curls! i know it was a one shot but i'd love more from them. like maybe them talking on the drive home after meeting your parents and ofc the engagement. They didn’t quite get to to the drive home part (😈) but I hope you like it.

genre: angst, fluff, smut

word count: 6.1K

author’s note: I wasn’t planning on a part 2, but I just didn’t feel like I was ready to be done with these two sappy little cuties, and I got a few requests for more so here we are. I wanted to make it so you could read this without having read Curls, so there are a few callbacks and things to make it cohesive. I also wasn’t planning on making it at all angsty, but I just couldn’t imagine a world where reader’s parents didn’t judge him at least a little. 😈 Thank you to @boomhauer and @kissmecaiti for talking me through all the angsty little thoughts I had and giving me inspiration.

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511 notes - Posted October 9, 2022

Listen to the Trees - Eddie Munson x Plus Size Reader - Friends to Lovers

summary: Spending your long weekend home from college reading Tolkien with your childhood best friend, Eddie. Couldn't want anything more. Except you do. You want Eddie, more than just friends, but when the words don't ever seem to come out and you miss your train home, things get interesting...

warnings: little bit of perv!Eddie (he masturbates thinking about reader), nothing else really of note - this is pretty much just sappy fluff with two sweet stupid friends who don’t admit how much they love one another

genre: friends to lovers, fluff, little tiny smut

word count: 6.1k

author's note: I was inspired by a prompt I saw on @glasswriter1 "I missed the last train, and it is all because of you and your obsession with speaking trees!" and I just immediately thought of Eddie and his love of LOTR. This totally ends on a major cliffhanger so if you all are into it I have more to come. Asks are always open for any feedback 💚

part 2

The sweet solace of Eddie’s room is a welcome respite from the bitter chill of fall, the wind threatening against the thin windows of his trailer. Your long weekend home from college is almost up, not nearly enough time to spend with your childhood best friend and he is trying to consume every last possible second with you before your train leaves from Indianapolis. Taking you back to Chicago, back to the drudgery of school and work, and too far away from Eddie.

Bonding over fantasy lands and banding together as outcasts usually do, Eddie and you had been inseparable since that first moment you shared your lunch with him in 1st grade. You and Eddie had shared everything together since then; snacks, movie marathons, study notes, hopes and dreams, fears and secrets, looks that lingered too long for people who were supposed to be just friends.

Everything changed when you had decided to pursue an art history education in Chicago, wanting to get at least a little breathing space from Hawkins, and Eddie had stayed put, taking some vocational courses at the community college and working at Thatcher Tires. Late night phone calls and a stream of handwritten letters did little to fill the Eddie-sized gap in your life, only leaving a crater-sized chasm right in the middle of your chest. No friendship or sexual partner in college could ever muster up enough mortar to fill the cracks he created. No other man could ever match the way Eddie looked at you, deep coffee-colored pools of wonder and awe like you were the most captivating creature he’d ever seen.

Your romantic feelings for Eddie had bubbled up slowly, like a geyser waiting to erupt. They had always been there in some way or another, simmering under the surface as the years of friendship went on. He was your best friend, your protector from all the chaos in your life, your guiding moon in the dark night. He had always been there for you and you for him, but you didn’t know just how much you felt for him until the distance and separation made you reflect on everything that could’ve been. You were never sure if he felt the same way about you, you’d never had the courage to bring it up and it certainly wasn’t ever a topic he approached. He was always the affectionate, touchy type with the people he was closest to, so you had been resigned to the fact that you were just one of the guys to him.

The long holiday weekend had given the perfect excuse to make the train ride home. You told yourself were going to visit family and friends, but you knew from the moment Eddie scooped you into his arms at the train station, trying to hide the tears that were edging their way out of the corners of his chocolate brown eyes, that you would be spending every waking moment of the weekend with Eddie.

And there you are, lying propped up on your side on Eddie’s bed, covered in blankets that smell like smoke and the cheap cologne you had gotten him for his birthday last year, trying to tame a pending eruption of emotions inside you while staring and attempting to listen as he talks animatedly about everything and nothing all at once.

“Earth to Y/N?” Eddie asks, shifting forward from his upright position against the pillows to wave his hand playfully in front of you.

“Hmm, what? I’m listening,” you insist, adjusting your position so you’re sitting up fully facing him now.

“Sure you are. Then what did I say,” he smirks, his tongue prodding the inside of his cheek as he crosses his arms over his chest.

“You were talking about speaking trees, Ents. And how you’re going to use them in an upcoming campaign with the guys you met at college,” you reply confidently, matching his challenging pose with your own as you sit up and cross your arms, the blankets shrugging off your shoulders.

“So you did catch some of it!! But I literally just asked you a question about said Ents. You gonna answer it, since you were listening so super carefully there, Sunshine?” his pet name for you rolling off his tongue with a tart sweetness that makes you giggle.

“Ok fine, you got me. I zoned off for a second. I was thinking about what time we need to leave to get to the train station on time,” your words not entirely a lie, but also not exactly what you had been ruminating about. “What did you ask me, sorry?”

“Do you remember the Entwives?,” his face softens into a smile with your apology. You do indeed remember the Entwives, in fact you’re pretty sure you were the one who had brought them up to him during one of your many rereadings of The Two Towers, finding it so achingly sad that there would be never be a reunion between the Ents and their wives who had gone to plant beautiful gardens only to be killed or enslaved when Sauron burned through the land.

“I think I remember them, but remind me please,” you smile coyly, knowing the information he’s about to share but truly wanting to hear what he has to say.

“Well Treebeard thinks that the wives are lost forever after they moved to the Brown Lands to plant and grow smaller things and were wiped out by Sauron. But remember how Merry and Pippin say they’ve seen an Ent, or Entwife, walking north of the Shire?” he wiggles his eyebrows dramatically, waiting for your response. An uncontrollable shiver hits you, realizing just how cold the room was without the cocoon of blankets, but you nod, teeth chattering.

“Jesus, Sunshine, how’d you already manage to wiggle outta that blanket burrito I made for you. Come ‘ere, I feel like a furnace right now so I’ll share some warmth,” he motions for you to lay in between his outstretched legs, untwisting the blankets and folding them back for you to crawl under. You stare down at his form, frayed light wash jeans hugging his slender frame, faded black t-shirt riding up to expose the soft trail of curls that disappear into his waistband as he reaches his arms out for you in a grabby motion. You want nothing more than to curl against his chest and tell him how much you missed him, missed his touch, your skin melting against his, missed the feelings you get when you’re around him, sealing all your words and feelings with a passionate first kiss. But you don’t do that. You can’t. Not now at least. Instead, you just burrow yourself into his lap, letting out a contented sigh as he wraps the blankets around you tightly and you rest your head on the soft cushion of his lower stomach.

“So, for my campaign, I’m going to have one of my players see an Entwife while they’re out on the road. Or I guess a treant wife because they’re called treants in D&D. Anyway, the wives aren’t really all dead, they’ve just been in hiding or hibernation or something, I’m still figuring out that idea. But then the party gets a summons from the treant that is the guardian of the local forest that there have been several sightings of the wives and the party is sent off on a quest to find them,” Eddie’s words tumble from his lips in a babbling flow, hands gesturing wildly then coming to rest softly on your covered shoulder. “What do you think? Does that sound cool or totally lame? I need some trademark Sunshine honesty here,” his voice anxious as he coaxes out your answer, always valuing your opinion even when it would come out a little harsher than you meant, which it often did.

“I think that sounds like the start of a totally awesome quest. If I weren’t so far away, you know I would want to jump in on that campaign in a heartbeat,” you answer honestly, looking up into his pleading brown eyes.

“I wish you could play in my campaigns again too,” he echoes with a playful pout, but you can see the truth behind his eyes. He has missed you too, he says so several times throughout the weekend. But you are sure it’s not in the same way that you missed him.

“There is a D&D club on campus and I tried to join in on one of their campaigns, but the DM was…creepy,” you admit quietly, ice cold fingers creeping out from under the blankets to toy with the hem of his shirt.

“Even weirder than little ‘ol me?” he grins and you nod, the movement of your cheek against his shirt causing it to shift up and expose that deliciously inviting swath of flesh and delicate curls. “Creepy how?” he urges you to go on, his eyes fixed to where your fingers are pulling loose threads from the worn patch just above the front pocket of his jeans, inching closer to his tummy with each thread yanked away.

“He just made it weird. Like the only thing he focused on about my character was the fact that I was the only woman on the adventuring party, and it was all heaving bosoms and dirty jokes at my expense. I played like two sessions and then never showed my face again,” you admit with an injured chuckle, and Eddie jolts forward, though you’re unsure if it’s from your words or your frosty fingers suddenly making contact with the bare skin of his midriff.

“Christ, your fingers feel like icicles,” his whole body stiffens, a sharp intake of breath as you swirl your fingers playfully against his alabaster skin. “That is super shitty about the club and the DM. Many guy DMs are weird lonely losers, but can be surprisingly real pricks whenever they have a real live lady in their presence, especially one as pretty, scary, and charmingly intimidating as you Sunshine,” his voice stiff but he boops your nose playfully, still wincing away from your frigid touch.

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552 notes - Posted September 14, 2022

Constellations - Eddie Munson x Plus Size Female Reader Series

series masterlist

part 2/?

summary: After an eventful evening at the Battle of the Bands, Eddie provides some comfort and distraction at the diner, but the date isn’t over just yet. He has more planned and it gets a little....heated.

warnings: SMUT MINORS DNI! Eddie and reader are both 18+, mentions of previous sexual assault, mentions of absent parents (kinda?), brief body insecurities, pet names, little touch starved Eddie, basically just a whole bunch of kissing and heavy petting, then fingering, oral f receiving, orgasm f and m

genre: fluff, smut

word count: 8.6k (again, brevity is not my strong suit)

author’s note: I am so grateful for all the support and nice comments I received on part one, I really wasn’t expecting it to get much traction at all so I’m so thankful for all the positive feedback. I also have to thank @boomhauer for the tiddy wrangler line 🙏🏼 I have not written smut for 10 years so if this totally sucks, I am very sorry. 🫣

Eddie parked the van in a small clearing in the trees on the banks of Lover’s Lake. You had been there a few times during the day, soaking up some of the summer rays and tucking into a good book, but the lake looked entirely different by the light of the moon. Shadows play in the gaps between the trees, eerie silence save a few hooting owls and crunching of branches as other woodland creatures scurry about under the cover of inky blackness.

Eddie dramatically shifts in the driver’s seat once the van has lurched into park, turning to face you and clapping his hands together. “Ok, so, lay it on me babe. What do you know about metal music? What have you heard that you like?”

“Hmm, I’ve listened to a few Iron Maiden songs, ‘Phantom of the Opera’ and ‘The Trooper’. I actually liked a few Metallica songs that Holly played for me, I just can’t remember the names,” you list a few basics, hoping he was ready for your very beginner level knowledge on the subject. You lean back in your seat to face him, watching curiously as his eyes go wide, grinning and drumming his hands against the steering wheel.

“Alright, okay, I can work with that,” he chews his bottom lip in thought as he rummages through the tapes and general debris that scatter the front seat of the van. “Sorry ‘bout the mess, I don’t usually have company, especially company as pretty as you. Now where the fuck did I…aha!” Eddie triumphantly holds up an Iron Maiden tape, Piece of Mind scrawled across it in calligraphy with what looks like a zombie in chains lunging towards you.

“Yikes, he’s a bit creepy, isn’t he,” you suppose, tapping the case gently as if not to wake the creature lurking inside.

“That’s Eddie.”

“What?” you give him a quizzical look, head tilting to the side.

“I’m not being funny, that’s just the band’s mascot or whatever. His name is Eddie, pretty sweet name I think,” he beams, sarcasm lacing his tone as he inserts the cassette into the tape deck, careful to turn down the volume a touch, not wanting to burst your eardrums on the first music education lesson. “Are you ready to have your mind blown, sweetheart?” You nod and smile, the epic guitar and drums of the first song already beginning to thrum through your veins, goosebumps shivering down your arms as you let yourself relax and enjoy the music. It isn’t half bad, your body can’t help but move to the beat, subtle toe taps and head bobs with Eddie watching you intensely.

“So, give me your honest review. Do I have a convert or am I going to have to work a little harder than that?” Eddie presses as the first song comes to an end.

“I’m not completely sold, I think I’d still prefer to listen to New Order over Iron Maiden, but I am trying to be more open and accepting of new things. Hit me with the next song, my body is willing and ready,” your words playing tricks on you as they make their way out of your mouth, blood already thumping hot in your ears, staring agape at Eddie for his response.

“Christ, Y/N, well if you put it that way,” he cackles, his whole body in motion as the laughter shakes him.

“Let me rewind,” you make a babbling sound as if imitating a video tape rewinding, only causing Eddie to laugh louder and your cheeks to flame an even brighter shade of pink. “I just mean that my ears are ready for the music. My body is ready too, for you. I mean, I’m willing to be ready for whatever you want to do to me. Fuck. Shit. I’m going to stop talking now, just play the song and let me slowly slip away into my grave, please.” You shrink down in your seat, flopping the leather jacket over your face in shame as you hear Eddie’s laughter begin to fade out into a soft wheezy chuckle.

“Hey, hey, come back here, sweetheart. You can’t make a spicy confession like that and then just hide from me,” Eddie’s voice saccharine and playful as he tosses the jacket off of you, his finger curling under your chin to bring your eyes to look at him. “I’m glad you feel that way, knuckles. I will definitely be keeping that in mind for future reference,” he whispers, his thumb ghosting towards the plumpness of your bottom lip, his eyes flickering down to follow the steady path his thumb is trailing. You close your eyes, inhaling deeply, expecting his lips to meet yours within moments, but he doesn’t. You open your eyes to see him adjusting the volume on the stereo as another song comes to a crescendo, trying to hide the fact that he is peeking at you behind the curtain of his hair. Your lips purse into a thin line as you quickly look out the window, wondering if you have just misread the situation or maybe scared him off a little with how quickly you were willing to let him into your pants.

“Oh this is the best part,” Eddie hums softly and turns the volume knob, tapping his fingers against the steering wheel as a shrieking guitar solo wails from the speakers, ignoring whatever awkward exchange that had just been.

The next few songs play, but Eddie doesn’t ask for your opinion again. He smiles and nods when he sees your foot tapping through the chorus of “Flight of Icarus”, but he seems especially preoccupied with chewing on the loose skin around his thumbnail and reorganizing the center console.

After the final notes of “The Trooper'' echo through the speakers of the stereo, Eddie begins to get fidgety, gnawing raw red marks around the edges of his fingernails, bouncing his leg enough to shake the entire van as he looks over at you every few seconds, like you might suddenly disappear before his eyes. Without a word of warning, he suddenly scrambles to the back of the van, conjuring up a couple of blankets, a boombox, and a handful of cassette tapes, returning with a grin. “Wanna get high and look at the stars?” he blurts out, pulling out a little bag that was tucked in the inside pocket of his jacket and giving it a shake.

With a nod, you both tumble out of the van, quickly setting up the blankets in a plush arrangement in the soft grass that slowly slopes down to the sandy beach. Eddie’s deft fingers quickly rolling up a joint, licking the paper and pressing it neatly before bringing it to his lips to light. The earthy tang assaults your nostrils and makes your eyes sting momentarily as he takes the first drag, passing it over to you, fingers brushing in a moment that seems to last for an eternity.

~*~

You both develop a steady rhythm of passing the joint back and forth, settling back on the soft cushion of the blankets. You gaze up at the obsidian blanket above you, the blunt dangling haphazardly in between your lips, in awe of just how many stars there are. Of course, you knew there were millions of stars in the Milky Way, but they didn’t seem to shine as brightly in the city as they do on the banks of Lover’s Lake. The sticky sweet taste of strawberry milkshake lingering in your mouth, the crackling burn of the weed as it began to seep into your lungs and invade your senses, the gentle warmth of Eddie’s arm pressing against yours.

“There’s Cassiopeia, looks kind of like a W. Then right below her, it’s sometimes hard to make out, but there’s Cepheus and Draco,” Eddie’s pointer finger juts out to gesture at a cluster of shining stars that when strung together look a bit like a squiggly snake and a box with a triangle on top. “And of course right above Cassiopeia is their daughter, Andromeda. Kind of fucked that she’s forever bound to be next to her parent’s after what they did to her,” he rattles off the details eagerly, licking his lips as he scans the stars for other constellations and takes another puff off the quickly shrinking joint before extinguish it carefully in the damp grass next to him. You try to follow where his fingers are tracing patterns, connecting dots and telling stories, but you find it hard to turn your attention toward anything other than his face. His left eye squinting shut, pink tongue poking out of the corner of his mouth in concentration, his features softening as the boyish enthusiasm takes over.

“How do you know so much about Greek mythology and constellations?” your voice a whisper, as if not wanting to disturb the hushed peacefulness of the night air.

“Uhh, I got a little obsessed with the idea of the Underworld as a setting for one of my D&D campaigns in high school. That led to reading stories about Hades and Persephone, and before I knew it I had checked out every book the library had to offer about Greek myths and legends,” Eddie responds, his fingers absently twirling into the loose threads of the blanket underneath you both.

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567 notes - Posted September 11, 2022

Knuckles - Eddie Munson x Plus Size Female Reader

series masterlist

part 1/?

summary: Your summer spent with a best friend in Hawkins has thus far been uneventful. An impulsive outing to the Battle of the Bands competition and an unfortunate chain of events sends Eddie hurdling into your life and you are more than happy to make space for him there. A little hurt comfort, a lotta sweet fluff, and there will definitely be at least a part 2 if not more.

pairing: Eddie x plus size! reader

warnings: All characters are 18+ and you should be too. MINORS DNI! TW: this fic does contain mentions and depictions of sexual assault (not graphic, reader is non-consensually touched by a stranger at the bar), feelings of guilt after assault are briefly mentioned, plus size!reader with mentions of feelings around having their size compared to someone else, use of y/n, female pronouns and pet names used to describe reader, brief violence, mentions of bruising and blood, crying, eating and talk about food, eventual smut. if you find any of these things triggering, please do not continue to read

genre: fluff, angst, eventual smut

word count: 10.2k (oops, got a little carried away there)

author’s note: This is my first Eddie fic and the first fic I’ve written in about 10 years, so please be kind and repost and comment if you enjoy it 💜 Lightly proofread and edited, but tell me if there is anything super weird. I do not really incorporate anything from s4 and the characters are all college age. I have a part 2 of this already in the works, but let me know if there is anything specific you all would like to see from this story.

tags: tagging a few sweet mutuals who might like to read, feel free to ignore though :) @wroteclassicaly @boomhauer @thisishellfire @bayouteche @honeybee-reverie

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

“Please, please, please come!!” your best friend, Holly, whines, pouting with her hands on her hips. Soft afternoon summer light fades through the gauzy window coverings, fracturing and splitting as you flop back onto her pillowy bed, dust motes exploding in your wake. She has been making her case for over 20 minutes about why you should go see the Battle of the Bands competition that is being held at some dive bar called The Hideout, and Holly is always absolutely relentless in any argument you two have, especially if it is about metal music.

“It’s really not my thing,” your fingers dance lazily through the dust clouds and you try your best to avoid her laser-like gaze, “I know you want me to experience all of Hawkins while I’m here for the summer, but that is the one area we differ in. I’ll love you forever, but I will never understand how you can listen to the sound of shrieking guitars, drums that are way too intense, and some guy screaming scary lyrics at you and then you have the audacity to call it music” you smirk, catching her exasperated look out of the corner of your eye just as she tosses a pillow at your face.

“Hey!” you squeak and chuck the pillow right back at her, maybe with a little more force than you had meant to because she stumbles and plops down onto the bed next to you.

“Please, Y/N… if you absolutely hate it, we can leave and go see a movie or something, but I like really really REALLY want to go to this. It is the final battle between the top two metal bands in Hawkins, Corroded Coffin and The Feral Tomb, and….” she insists and then hesitates for a moment, chewing on her thumbnail, “...and there is this guy in The Feral Tomb, he’s the bassist, and, um…I…well…”

“Come on, Holls. So you want to drag me along to this…concert, and I use that term very loosely here, so that I can be your wingwoman and you can flirt with some metalhead? Am I getting all the details right here?” you sit up from the bed suddenly, still avoiding her puppy-dog eyes, but giving her sidelong glances through your eyelashes.

“Yes.” she replies sheepishly, her eyes dropping down to focus on the loose thread she is aimlessly unraveling from the pillow in her lap.

You had spent the last month at Holly’s childhood home in Hawkins, Indiana, enjoying the lazy small town summer and relishing in the much needed break after your junior year at Purdue Indianapolis. You two were roommates at university and when a family thing came up she said she had to head home for the summer. This meant giving up the apartment you shared, and you scrambled to try to find somewhere to stay. With no parents, relatives, or really other friends to speak of in the area, it would have been impossible to find somewhere you could afford alone on your measly coffee shop salary, even if it was just three summer months. When Holly offered for you to come along with her to her hometown, you felt unfamiliar knots in your stomach, maybe something akin to sisterly love, a feeling entirely foreign to you as an only child. She had been by your side since freshman orientation, her mom even acted the part of a parental figure for you since your mom was unable to make any of the welcome events, and when it came time to move out of the freshman dorms and into the nearby apartments she didn’t even second guess the idea that you two would be moving in together. So with a few futile “no I couldn’t possibly”s and “well I don’t want to be a bother”s you packed your bags and headed with her to Hawkins.

It certainly wasn’t the most exciting place to spend the summer, but with home cooked meals every night, late night giggle sessions with Holly, and the sweet tan you were getting from all the time out at Lover’s Lake, it felt like the home you’d never had.

You shake your head, clearing the reverie and aimless thoughts to focus back on Holly, who is practically gnawing a hole in the raw flesh of her thumb as she awaits your response.

“So, what’s his name then, this bassist? What’s so great about him? And is there one for me too?” you sigh and push her shoulder playfully. Her squealing immediately pierces through the room and she leaps from the bed, dashing over to the closet.

“His name is Theodore, but he goes by Theo. Isn’t that so sexy and mature sounding? He’s got this gorgeous blonde hair and he is just how I like them.” She coos as she begins to furiously push masses of hanging clothes aside, her lips pursing as she inspects a lacy black dress and then tosses it aside.

“And just how do you like them Holly?” you give her a quizzical look, already knowing her answer would leave most scandalized. She pops back out of the closet, her hands on her hips incredulously.

“You know, dumb and eager to make me cum,” she winks and disappears into the closet again.

“Jesus, Holly, subtlety has never been your forte has it? So what about me then? Keep in mind my type is usually someone with some semblance of a brain, I would still like them to make me cum though,” you inquire, trying desperately to think back to the last time a guy had made you cum, but either your memory is failing you or it had been a painfully long time since that has occurred in your love life.

“The other guys in his band are pretty cute too, maybe not quite your usual brainy, bookish type, but hey, it’s just a summer hookup. And the other band, Corroded Coffin, well I went to high school with all of them, and they were all kind of super nerdy then, so I can’t say that I find any of them sexy, but maybe you will,” she wrinkles her nose and sticks her tongue out at you.

“Alright, well give me all the details on the ones you went to high school with then,” you roll your eyes and stand up to rummage through your own clothes, trying to find something even remotely suitable for a metal concert.

“Well, Eddie is the lead guitarist/singer. He was the Dungeon Master of their little D&D club and I remember him always putting on some kind of dramatic production during lunch. He’s kind of full of himself, but in a charming way. Jeff is the other guitarist, he’s sweet, definitely a little shy. Gareth is the drummer, we had a project we were paired for in history and he did all of it for me so we love that. The bassist is Barry, or Larry. Maybe Carl? I can’t remember his name honestly.” She continues flipping through her closet, leaving piles of almost entirely black clothes in her wake, until she finds the winners. You flip over the names in your head, trying to imagine just based on her brief descriptions if any of them would be worth the effort of dressing up for this thing.

“Aha! Here you go!” she tosses a leather jacket, some ripped black jeans, and a faded oversized Iron Maiden shirt that has the sleeves cut off into your lap, then begins to shimmy out of her sweatpants and t-shirt in favor of a pair of leather pants and a cropped black shirt that maybe once had a band’s logo printed on it, but was so well loved and worn that there was only a whisper of a print that remained.

“But I barely even know who Iron Maiden is. What if someone asks me about them and I don’t know what to say,” you panic slightly, cautiously shrugging the shoulders of your sundress down to slip the foreign shirt over your head.

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1,142 notes - Posted September 4, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Curls - Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader

part 2

summary: Eddie is getting ready to meet your parents for the first time after a year of dating. He is particularly nervous about impressing them, so you help him do his hair. And then help him relax a little 😉

warnings: smut 18+ MINORS DNI. established relationship, kissing, breast play, oral (f receiving), unprotected p in v sex (mention of birth control but still wrap it up and be safe 👍🏻), lots of sweet sappiness between Eddie and reader, reader has curly hair but it is not described in great detail, reader is implied as plus size but doesn’t have to be read that way, reader has relationship with both parents. I think that is it but let me know if I missed something.

genre: fluff, smut

word count: 4.9K

author’s note: I couldn’t get the idea out of my head about doing Eddie’s hair and so this just all kind of came rambling out. Any feedback is always appreciated 💕

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3,032 notes - Posted October 5, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

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