#joaquin pheonix x reader

[jokerislandgirl32]

How Us Arthur Lovers Look At Him:

Just like that….we look at him just like this lady in his daydream and we think exactly what’s in the thought bubble, 😂.

[glitterhammies]

Should i call you Joker?

FLUFF 

You and Arthur had been together for quite sometime now. You knew when he ups and you knew when he had his downs, but right now you couldn't tell what he was feeling. His Mother had died the day before, he was going to be on the Murray franklin show and in between all of this he seemed calm. Even happy. you lay on top of him your head on hist chest listening to his heartbeat "whatcha thinking about" you ask him softly. " I don't know anymore" he replied taking a long puff of his cigarette. " you know you can talk to me Arthur. please just let me know what's going on in there" pointing towards his  head. 

He was silent but not an uncomfortable silence almost like he was preparing himself for what he was about to tell you " you know I haven't been happy one moment of my entire fucking life, but right here right now I feel amazing. Like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders" he was staring into your eyes. " I have you, I'm going on Murrays show I'm now free from my mother, i feel truly happy"

You smiled up at him giving him a slight kiss on the lips which he received and returned" should i start calling you joker? Or is that for only when you have your makeup on" you giggle poking him in the ribs. You knew he was changing. Not just mentally but physically as well. he was becoming more confident, talking without his usual stuttering and getting his way in most confrontations, this was his joker side taking hold. 

You sat up on his chest slowly kissing down his neck " come on baby were gonna need to get ready soon". you were going to be on the Murray franklin show and you both needed to look your best. Arthur had told you his plans for Murray, one which you agreed on. you wouldn't be on stage but you will be watching from the sides and you couldn't wait to see Joker take control of Murray and show him who's the one laughing. 

TIME SKIP 

you were sat on the floor of Arthurs room, makeup scattered all around you, putting on the last final touches of your face paint. You wanted to look the part so you opted for some black white and red face paint to match his. Looking up you saw Arthur at his vanity slowly scrunching up a photo of his mother. Arthur was leaving and Joker was taking full form you could see his confidence growing the more he added the white paint to his face. He looked at you through the mirror smiling at your reflection " come here" he whispered. You approached him putting your arms round his waist looking at both your reflections. " we look good together" you giggle into his ear admiring the clown paint you both had on. " Gotham's not going to know what hit them, well be the king and Queen" Arthur gestured opening his arms like he's welcoming a crowd into his embrace.

That's when you both heard the doorbell ring. you got up to answer it. " wait don't" he called after you. you saw him reaching into his dresser and pull out a pair of scissors, slowly concealing them in his back pocket. " Coming" he shouted looking at you, knowing everything is about to change. 

Thank you for reading my first Joker fanfiction, I know its quite short. Ill promise I will get better but I'm taking small baby steps uploading all my ideas onto here. Joker is like my number one hyper fixation character so expect a lot more stories for him. I love writing Arthur and find it so easy to do. If there is any prompts or ideas you would like to see please let me know and ill be more than happy to write them. 

until next time little Hammies*

[sabbqj]

wip Joker

[oneinajuniverse]

☛Jokers Masterlist

↠ Heath Ledger's Joker

↠ Joaquin's Arthur Fleck (Joker)

[ashtonwritesstuff]

✩ hiii i’m ashton & this is my NEW writing blog

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so my old writing blog (freddurstsbbg) has been logged out of and my new phone literally won’t let me log back into it 💀 unfortunately my drafts were stored on that blog </3 but that’s okay !!

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ .

✩ anyways here’s who/what i will write for:

- korn (not fieldy)

- limp bizkit

- joey jordison

- eminem

- insane clown posse

- joaquin pheonix’s joker (i have not seen the second movie yet do not spoil !!)

- heath ledger’s joker

- my chemical romance

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ .

✩ what i WON’T write:

- smut. i don’t know how to write it, it feels weird. sorry 😭 i am open to doing smutty headcanons tho

- anything besides x reader

- anything nasty or bad in general (pedophilia, abuse etc.)

- character death. i will literally cry myself to sleep </3 sorry

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ .

✩ other stuff that you should know:

- i am currently taking requests !!

- please keep in mind that i have very little experience posting my work. constructive criticism is appreciated, but please just know that i’m new to this 😭

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ .

[sylverfishies]

My fanfiction rulez 😱 + intro

Hi!! I'm Sylverfish! or just Sylvester 🤭 my pronouns are It/De/Xe/He

I'm new to fanfiction writing I am so sorry if it sucks in the beginning💀

Fandoms I'm in and who I write for:

🦇Batman universe🦇:

Batman (any version)

Joker (Joaquin Pheonix, Heath Ledger, Cameron Monaghan (Jerome and Jeremiah) + any comic)

Oswald Cobblepot (Comics, Robert L Taylor, Paul Williams)

Riddler (Paul Dano, Cory M Smith)

Victor Zsasz (Anthony Carrigan)

Butch Gilzean <3 <3 (Drew Powell)

Jim Gordan (any version)

Maria "Fish" Mooney (Jada Smith)

💣Team Fortress 2💣:

Medic

Spy

Sniper

Scout

Soldier

Demoman

Heavy

Engineer

🔪Slashers🔪:

Jason Voorhees

Michael Myers

Patrick Bateman

Norman Bates (Movie only srry bates motel lovers :(

Bubba sawyer <3

Robert (Chop Top) Sawyer

Nubbins Sawyer

Lester Sinclair

⚛️The Big Bang Theory⚛️:

Leonard Hofstadter

Sheldon Cooper

Rajesh Koothrappali

📺Crashbox📺:

Professor Rocket

Jumpin Johnny Jumble

Captain Bones

Sketch

🏃‍♂️Extras that don't make a whole category:

Shaun Murphy (The Good Doctor)

Morticia and Gomez Addams (Anjelica Huston & Raul Julia) (yes it has to be poly >:(

Stuart "2d" Pots & Murdoc Niccals

Pavi Largo & Luigi Largo (Repo! The Genetic Opera)

Red guy (dhmis)

HEADS-UP: I picked these characters at 2 am so I most likely forgot a few people, if ur fav isn't on this list just ask if I write for them!

Rulez! Do's and Dont's

✅️What I will write for✅️:

Lemon and Lime

Fluff

Minor fighting/violence

Male readers

FTM readers <3

Character x reader

Imagines

Headcanons

full fanfictions?? Idfk

🚫Stuff I WON'T write🚫:

Fem readers or gender-neutral readers

Non-con

Dub-con

CNC

P3dophilia

"Watersports"

Sc@t or V0m!t

!nc3st

Death of the reader

This list will have updates probably -Sylverfishies

[ivedescoveredheathsjoker]

[peachmegirl]

Saint Lindsay Lohan.

[sexy-monster-fucker]

Dreams

Joker|Arthur Fleck x Reader

warning: super nsfw

word count:  2,005

~~~

He was on top of you.  You both were wrapped up underneath your comforter.  He was pounding his cock inside you fast and hard.  Your skin was sticky from sweat.  You moaned his name loudly.  He was breathing heavy.  He kissed you passionately, but sloppy.  You had never had sex this good.  You could hear your skin colliding, it was like heaven.  He grinned down at you, sweat dripping from his locks.  He kissed you once again.  

You woke up the next morning in a sweat.  “It was all a dream,” you thought.  You ran your fingers through your hair.  Arthur Fleck was your neighbor.  He was odd, but you found it charming.  You both would often have long conversations in your doorways, neither of you ever inviting the other inside.  You did not know how Arthur felt about you.  He obviously enjoyed talking to you because you had seen him dodge plenty of conversations with others, but he always stopped to talk to you each time he saw you.  You enjoyed Arthur.  You thought about him a lot.  Sometimes you thought about him in ways someone should not think about another unless they were romantically involved.  The dream you had had was one of many about him.

You decided you wanted to go over to Arthur’s apartment today.  You made some food, dressed yourself up slightly, and headed over to his apartment.  You hesitated to knock on the door.  “He’s going to think you’re crazy,” you thought.  But that was okay with you.  You knocked on the door.  It took a moment, but Arthur opened the door.  You smiled at him widely.  He also smiled upon seeing you, “Y/N, what are you doing here?”  You held up the food, “I thought maybe you’d like to have lunch?”  Arthur smiled widely, “Oh, wow.  I would love to.”  He led you inside, taking the food from you and sitting it on the dining room table.  He pulled out a chair for you, scooting it in for you as you sat.  He grabbed plates and silverware from the cabinets and drawers.  He set them for you and himself.  You split the food and both began enjoying the meal.

Arthur stared at you from across the small round table.  Truthfully, he had been thinking about you a lot.  He did almost anything to get to talk to you.  He wanted your attention more than anything.  He longed for you.  He wanted you.  He had pleasured himself to thoughts of you several times.  He had even been thinking about you this morning.  He was thinking about taking you in his hands next time he saw you and bringing you back to his apartment.  He thought about pinning you against the counter and fucking you right there.  “No need to waste time going into the bedroom when I could fuck her right her,” he had thought.  It was different seeing you in his apartment.  He felt like this was a sign.  “God,” he thought, “The things I am going to do to her.  She just waltzed her little self in here.  She has no idea what she’s got in store for her now that she’s with me.  Fuck, I hope she wants me as much as I want her.”  

“That was delicious, Y/N,” Arthur complimented you.  You blushed slightly, “Thank you so much, Arthur.”  Arthur stood and began clearing the table.  “You should stay a little while.  We can find something on the TV to watch,” Arthur spoke in a deep voice.  “I don’t mean to intrude on your day, Art,” you opposed.  “I’m inviting you.  Please, stay with me,” he shot a grin at you.  You nodded with pink cheeks, “Okay, I will.”

Arthur led you into the living room.  You sat on the couch, hoping he would join right beside you.  He walked away into the hallway.  He came back with a blanket the perfect size for the two of you.  He laid it on you, covering you politely.  He joined you on the couch, putting his arm around the back of you.  He did not join you under the blanket which disappointed you.  You threw part of the blanket onto him.  “But it’s supposed to be all for you,” Arthur opposed.  “I would rather share with you,” you smiled.  You snuggled up against Arthur, placing one of your hands on his thigh as you stared at the TV.

“Oh my God,” Arthur thought, “She’s trying so hard to be near me.  D-Does this mean she wants me?”

“He’s being such a gentlemen,” you thought, “I hope I am reading into this right.”

You rested your head on his chest.  Arthur’s heart skipped a beat.  He petted your head.  

“Y/N,” Arthur questioned.  “Hmm, yes, Arthur?”  He looked at your deeply, “Did you come here for more than just lunch?  Are you looking for... dessert perhaps?”  You felt your cheeks and other places flood with heat.  “I-I don’t know if I understand,” you were embarrassed.  He pinched your chin between his fingers, “Did you come here with food, all dolled up, to come and fuck me?”  You let out a deep breath.  You could feel yourself growing wet with his words.  You nodded innocently.  “Clever little thing, aren’t you.  Coming here, getting me all snuggled up with you on the couch, how did you know?  I’ve been dreaming about fucking you for weeks, doll.  I’ve even gotten off to you a couple times.  Fuck, I’ve been dreaming about dicking you until you couldn’t leave this place,” Arthur growled.  You basically moaned at him, “Arthur, I’ve been dreaming about you fucking me for weeks now.”  Arthur smirked, “Is that so?”  He ran his hand up your leg, under your skirt, inches away from your opening.  You trembled at his touch.  His hand continued to inch closer and closer to your opening.  

“Arthur,” you muttered.  He raised an eyebrow, “Yes, baby?”  “I’m not wearing any underwear,” you slightly giggled.  Arthur’s face became painted with a wide grin, “Oh, so you did plan on getting something from me today?  What a naughty girl you are.”  His fingers finally reached your opening.  Arthur placed his lips against your neck, “I hope this is what you wanted.”  He shoved three fingers deep inside you.  You threw your head back in pleasure.  Arthur smiled against your skin.  He began to pump his fingers inside you fast.  “Fuck, Arthur,” you moaned with every motion he made.  

He pulled his fingers out of you abruptly causing you to whine.  He looked at his glistening fingers, admiring them.  “God,” Arthur stuck the fingers in his mouth sucking them clean, “What a good girl you are.”  You watched him as he wiped his fingers on his pants.  You placed your hands on both sides of his face, pulling him to your lips.  You pressed a deep kiss onto him.  You parted his lips with your tongue.  He placed a firm hand on your waist.  Your tongues intertwined.  You groaned as Arthur bit at your lip, pulling away from you.  He quickly placed his lips to your neck.  His top half was pushed against yours, he was trying to be as close to you as possible.  He left open mouth kisses all over your neck.  You shivered at him.  You felt him smile against your neck.  He worked his way up, kissing the soft spot behind your ear.  You smiled, arching your back at him.  He reached his arms around your back, grabbing you in the lower part of it.  He held you close to him.  He moved away from your neck and looked at you.  He was admiring you.  He loved the way you looked, he would never get tired of this view.  You stared up at him, leaning and placing a small kiss on his forehead.  

“Come to the bedroom with me,” Arthur questioned, mostly demanding.  You ran a hand over his hair, “Of course.”  Arthur took your hand in his, guiding you to his dark bedroom.  He led you in first, closing the door behind him.  It was almost completely black in the room.  You stood completely still, trying to let your eyes adjust.  It was cold and silent in the room.  Arthur placed a hand on you in the dark.  He pulled you into him, his hard member poked at you through his pants.  You could hear him breathing.  You placed a hand on his chest, feeling it rise and fall with each breath.  He took your other hand and placed it on his hard member.  You blushed.  Neither of you could see each other completely, you could make out small details of each other’s figures.  You gripped his hard member through his pants, he let out a low breath.  You tugged at him slightly, seeing how he would react.  He rested his forehead on yours, his mouth was open.  You could feel his warm breath hitting you in the face.  Your name fell from his lips quietly.  He grabbed your wrist lightly, removing it.  He ran his hands down your back, taking your ass in them.  He pulled you against him, holding you there.  He rested his chin on your shoulder.  His lips met at your ear, “Are you ready?”  You nodded innocently.  

He picked you up, carrying you the short distance to the bed.  He laid you down softly.  “Undress,” his voice was raspy.  You did as he wanted.  You dropped all your clothes to the floor.  You heard his belt hit the floor.  He was on top of you now.  You felt his hard member hit your thigh.  You ran your hands up his bare chest.  He was bony.  His ribs stuck out.  You could feel his heart beating out of his chest as you rested your hands there.  His skin was softer than you expected.  He kissed you tenderly.  His lips traveled to your jawline, placing kisses anywhere he could.  He grabbed your leg, pulling it up on him and the other directly after.  He positioned himself at your opening.  You saw his eyes in the dark.  They looked hungry.  He slid inside you.  He filled you nicely.  You called out to him.  He began to pump himself inside you fast and hard.  He was breathing heavy.  You moaned and groaned with each of his motions.  You could feel a knot growing in your stomach.  You ran a hand up to Arthur’s face, “I-I’m about to finish, Art.”  He crashed his lips into yours.  He began slamming himself into you.  He was hitting all the right spots inside you.  You clenched around him as your orgasm ripped through you.  You called out Arthur’s name loudly.  He did not slow his pace.  “Fuck, you feel so good all tight around me like this,” Arthur moaned.  The darkness was spinning as you came down from your high.  You felt Arthur’s cock twitch inside you as his climax was approaching.  Arthur began to kiss you as he spilled inside you.  He pumped himself inside you, filling you with his seed.  One of his hands ran through your hair.  He pulled out of you once he was finished.  

Arthur rested his body on yours.  You wrapped your arms around him as his body relaxed.  You ran your fingers up and down his back, your nails scratching him slightly.  “That was amazing, Art,” you whispered to him.  You heard Arthur smile, “You are amazing.”  You blushed.  He was so kind.  Arthur rolled off you, pulling you on top of him.  You rested your head on his chest as he petted you.  “I want you to lay here with me all night,” Arthur murmured.  You chuckled, “It’s the middle of the day.”  Arthur chuckled along with you, “I don’t care.  I don’t want this moment to end.”  You got comfortable on him.  You felt yourself growing tired.  “Can I just lay here and snuggle and nap with you,” you yawned.  Arthur kissed the top of your head, “Of course.  That sounds like heaven.”  

You felt yourself drifting off.

~~~

//Thank you for reading!  If you are interesting in being tagged in future Joker works, let me know!//

[Tags]

@vengealis ~ @sigynbandraoi-blog ~ @mapreza1 ~ @starguardian0319 ~ @yoonbum-in-drag ~ @she-he-or-it ~ @girlwithwolftatoo ~ @reewriterofdarkness ~ @garagepills ~ @fandomintentions ~ @the2dgirl ~ @vampirozi ~ @littlejunkettes ~ @daddywisesslut ~ @herteardrop ~ @treadinthedeadlights ~ @ilovecrzybear ~ @xmusichealsthesoulx ~ @millandram​ ~ @soulsdontbreaktheybeeend ~ @obsessedandthirsty ~ 

[kholei-nazareth]

My Man's!!!💖💖💖✨✨✨

[ive-got-99-problems]

Father Phoenix

Photo was done by the amazing and beautiful @clown-prince-of-pussy​ , be sure to check her out!

You were never really a religious person, while you had no problem with religion it just never really suited you. Your family, on the other hand, every Sunday your mother would usher you out of bed and tell you to get dressed for church. You were old enough to make your own decisions but when it came to going to church, you didn't want to hurt your parent's feelings by not attending with them. But it wasn't all bad, you had some friends at church and there were always plenty of attractive men to look at.

It wasn't until recently though, when you started to get up before your parents and would practically drag them out of the door to attend church. You were now always signing up to help clean and help with cooking at the church. Why were you doing all this? Father Phoenix.

He had just started preaching at your church and by god, you could listen to him all day. He had such a smooth voice and such elegant movements. His hair graying and his fingers, oh god his fingers. It was unholy all of the things you thought whilst he preaches. You also attended confession a lot more, sometimes you could hear Father Phoenix snicker at some of the 'sins' you would confess.

"Y/N," he mused, "Saying no to going out with your friends isn't a sin."

You squirmed in your seat, it was late and you and the father were the only ones left in the church. As the father was about to leave you mentioned how you needed to confess but it could wait, he of course denied and the two of you immediately went into the confession booth.

"I-I'm sorry father," you muttered with flustered cheeks, "I'm wasting your time."

He laughed again, "You are not wasting my time, my child. If there is anything on your mind I only wish to put it at ease, that's my job."

You smiled shyly, there were multiple things he could do to put your mind at ease.

"Thank you, father," you whispered, a moment of silence sat before you got the nerve to speak again, "There is something else, father."

"And what is that, my child?"

You swallowed thickly, "I have been having these.... thoughts. Sexual thoughts," you tensed, "They've consumed my life, all I do is think about them. Even when you are preaching, I can't stop."

The father was silent for a moment, "And who, may I ask, are you thinking of these acts with."

You bit your lip before whispering, "You, father."

You could hear the church settling as you both sat in silence, you squirmed before wrapping your arms around yourself.

"I-I've been volunteering because I've wanted to see you, to be near you. Every time you preach I just imagine being under the pulpit and sucking your cock as you preach God's holy word. During one of the baptisms, I had to leave to go to the bathroom so I could touch myself because just seeing your body soaking wet...." you paused, "It was too much for me. I've had dreams where you fuck me on the alter, shove your fingers into my mouth. God, I can't take it, father."

You froze as you heard him stand and walk out of the confession booth, you whimpered. Fuck, you fucked everything up. Now he'd never speak to you again, maybe he'd kick you out of the church! Your parents would be so ashamed if they found out that you were kicked out due to having sexual thoughts of the preacher.

You jumped when the door to your booth swung open, father Phoenix standing before you with a smirk on his face.

"Well Y/N," he murmured, "If these thoughts are the reason you're doing such wonderful things for the church," he began to unbutton his robes, "Then perhaps we should give you more."

[devasafikir]

"Put On a Happy Face" The Joker ( Joaquin Phoenix )

[joaquinfeed]

Standing Still (Arthur Fleck x Reader)

Prompt: Reader and Arthur deal with mental health issues and sad feelings. But amidst all the pain, they’re still in love. (Please read the warnings!!)

A/N: Really, this one’s just for me. I wish I could hug him. :( Enjoy.

Warnings: Near suicide attempt, mentions of/implied depression and dissociation.  Angsty and dark themed, but has a hopeful/happy ending.  ——

You could hear Arthur’s words echoing through your head, ‘just breathe, baby.’

You tried breathing; you were desperate just to feel something, anything other than what you’re feeling now—if you could even call it feeling.

You knew something wasn’t right when Arthur’s words stopped bringing you comfort. The expressions of love and assurance that used to bombard your body with warmth and serenity, now ghosted over your ears like he never even opened his mouth. Or if he did, you didn’t hear him.

Over your own thoughts, you could barely make out the rattling of your ring hitting against the handgun as your hands clenched and unclenched the grip nervously. You honestly weren’t sure if you could ever go through with it; still, you enjoyed the power that came with finally having a choice over something in your life.

You could see the headlines now— Gotham City loses another to the suicide epidemic. Such a cruel and impersonal way to let others know of a loss, but you’ve seen one too many of these articles lately. Arthur, your boyfriend, always likes to keep newspapers lying around. And for a brief moment, if you did make the headlines as another statistic, you wonder if Arthur would be the first to read it.

The thought of him almost makes you smile. Never have you known anyone to be so selfless, kindhearted, and just utterly deserving of love more than him. It’s no secret that he has his flaws or his difficulties, as you prefer to call them, but you couldn’t help but feel like he’d be better off without you. 

He swears to you that you’ve helped him stay sane—the only thing in this Godforsaken city. But you know every time his gaze meet yours after a long day at HaHa’s, and your eyes are just as empty as his, he crumbles a little inside. The relationship teeters on a thin line of 'who can stay strong long enough to help the other out?’ You know there will come a time when you’re both too tired to keep the line from breaking.

Your hands begin to tremble as you bring the gun up to your chin and press the cold muzzle against your skin. You glanced out the window, wondering if anybody could see you, wondering if anybody would care if they did see you.

'Arthur would,’ your mind reasons. 'He would be devastated, and you know it.’

You shake those thoughts away, fighting to keep your heart and hands steady. You considered leaving a note telling Arthur that it wasn’t his fault. That he didn’t do a single thing to you; he only made life better. But you couldn’t find it in you to pick up the pen. As selfish as it was, you knew you wouldn’t be able to think of him and write the word goodbye.

Your finger hovered over the trigger as you closed your eyes and braced yourself for the impact. Before you could make another move, you felt strong arms ripping the gun from between your hands. As your eyes shoot open, you’re met with a heartbreaking sight. Arthur is standing in front of you, remnants of Carnival’s paint still discoloring parts of his skin, tears already dripping lines down his face. You stay silent, watching your lover open and close his mouth in a loss of words. The only thing coming out,

“Why would- why?”

A simple question, yet the weight of it holds you down. You shrug, and even though you know it’s not what he wants to see, it’s honest. You just wanted to feel.

“Why would you ever want to make me live without you, Y/N?” He asks, and honestly, that’s not what you were expecting. You know Arthur’s compassionate, and you know just how deeply he feels. But you were anticipating him to be angry. So angry he’d give you a speech about how he loves you, and how Gotham is full of shit-heads, and how if he can get through it, so can you. That speech never comes.

Instead, it’s “I’ve got you, baby,” as he holds you close to him while you sob. Neither of you even try and stop the tears as you standstill in the middle of the kitchen, holding onto each other for dear life.

You both calm down enough to walk to the bedroom, the gun Arthur ripped from you still lying on the counter. He tucked you into the covers of the bed before getting into them himself. He silently asked if you wanted to cuddle by holding his arms out for you, and of course, you buried yourself into his sweater.

After you were sure that several hours had passed, you moved to sit up in the bed, and Arthur followed your lead.

“I can’t hear you anymore,” you tell him, you’re voice sounding raspy from the hours spent crying. Arthur only gives you a puzzled look, wondering if he should call a doctor over your apparent hearing loss.

“I can’t hear anything the way that I used to. I listen to birds chirping, people laughing, songs playing, and I feel nothing. I hear-” you falter, your voice cracking. “I hear you singing and laughing, and saying all these sweet things, and I feel nothing.”

You couldn’t stop another sob from escaping your lips. Saying this all out loud, especially to Arthur, felt so wrong. You felt guilty for ever having to look at him and tell him he made you feel nothing because God, you loved him so fucking much.

You could see his laugh attack coming before you could hear it. A painful, deafening laugh that shook the bed beneath you. You reached over and grabbed his hands, trying your very best to push out some comforting words.

You couldn’t imagine how you both would look right now to an outsider. Arthur, laughing, tears running down his face, while you continued to hold him, whimpering into the darkroom. You run your fingers over his back, being careful not to hurt his newly formed bruises. Stupid bastards, you thought to yourself. The residents of Gotham and how they treated your boyfriend made you sick.

“You don’t love me anymore,” Arthur questions, but it comes out as more of a statement.

“No, no, no, baby. Of course I do. I can’t imagine loving anybody the way that I love you. You’re my world.”

Arthur shakes his head. “No. You said- you said you feel nothing for me.”

“I’m- it’s so hard to explain, but it’s not about you. It’s about everything. I don’t know what’s going on with me, but I can’t take it anymore.”

“Is that why you were going to…is that why?” His voice stays low, not bothering to look you in the eyes.

You nod, although he’s not looking at you. “I wanted to feel like I’m in control for once.”

“But you weren’t! Y/N, you’re not in control. Even when you were-"He pauses, letting out a shaky breath, like he was going to start laughing again. "You were never in control. Your illness is.”

“But-”

“No,” He says firmly, finally looking you in the eyes. “I hadn’t been happy a moment of my entire fucking life until you. Before that, I was letting my illness win. But I won’t let that happen to you. I refuse to let it. We’re going to get you help.”

“Arthur, how are we going to afford that? They cut the funding, and now you don’t even have a therapist anymore. How the hell am I supposed to get one?”

“I will take extra shifts. I-I will look for another job. I’ll-”

“No, Artie. Now I have to be firm. You already work hard, and you push yourself too hard for me. You taking another shift would mean coming home later. The later you stay out, the more Gotham idiots you run into,” you argue. “This is what I was afraid of for our relationship. If we’re both so fucked, how are we going to help each other? How am I supposed to be good enough for you if I’m not even good enough for myself?”

“You don’t have to be good enough for yourself yet. You don’t have to do anything to be good enough for me. You just are. I-I hope I don’t have to do anything to be good enough for you either.”

“You don’t,” you promise, and he leans down to kiss you for the first time since he got home.

“I’m not going to say that everything will be okay,” He tells you. “But we’re going to figure something out until you can feel the warm air outside, feel the fresh grass and the blue sky, feel me."



"What if I never do? What if I just stand still feeling nothing forever?” You lock eyes with him, worry displayed on your face.

“Then, I’ll stand with you.”

At that, a small sliver of happiness—the first genuine feeling you’ve had in months— washed over you, and a slight smile formed on your lips.

“I wouldn’t want anyone else to stand still with." 

You lean in, and your lips met in a chaste kiss. You were both too drained to let passion take over, but that surely didn’t stop you from laying back down with him and burying your head in his soft sweater once again.

Maybe you both can learn how to love yourselves again, together.

[dumbassfriendsgc]

joaquin phoenix really is that bitch

[local80smotel]

Headcanon; how he would kiss you

A/n: I just watched Joker and now I must spoil Arthur with affection that he deserves

Arthur;

The thing you would always notice is how much his bottom lip would tremble before it would connect with yours.

He would usually hold your hand while doing this too, pinkies intertwined.

You both would stay that way for mintues on end, sunlight that would lazily leak into the small, roach infested apartment through the curtains would warm the faces of you & him.

With him having no prior relationship experience it would be on you to deepen the kiss

He'd always be so happy to be this close to you in a physical sense due to his abandonment issues from his late mother

When you two would part, his face would be tinted with blush as he would smile your favorite smile; a genuine one.

He would smooch your cheek with a loud pop, whispering a "I love you"

Joker;

His blood soaked hands would be tangled in your hair, which would make you mentally groan at the mess it would be to wash out.

Still what would be funny would be the fact that his lip would still shudder, giving you the depressing feeling that maybe, somewhere, the man you loved deeply & dearly was still in there. That maybe the uncaring city of Gotham hadn't taken him away.

But, his kisses would be sharp and more hungry for your love and affection. For you to see him still even with all the chaos in the city that he caused.

It'd be a shock for him to kiss you so passionately and then deepen the kiss himself.

The taste of blood would always be present, making you miss the lone taste of tobacco but you'd never complain of that fact; you still loved being this close to him, even if you had no clue who he was anymore.

Kisses would last only mere seconds as he would have to keep moving

But the kisses that would last minutes were amazing, making every hair on your neck rise and made the question of if he loved you anymore disappear

[engagedlesbiansblog]

This would've been me if I was in the audience of Murray's show when Joker was announced