#jo is nasty

[jolapeno]

not me pulling this face 🥹 because do me yourself is suddenly getting a lot of love?!! whoever out there must be loving on it, thank you! 😘 I wish to send you a bouquet of jo love and forehead kisses

[blacktofade]

Lads, how are we feeling after the latest Gem video with that whole gemtho feast of them working on the tunnel together?

Etho continually hitting her while they tried to mine simultaneously!! (Which also blew my mind hello??? Let me press against your back and help you mine in a way that is not efficient at all???)

Etho letting Gem put down the tnt!!!

Gem telling Etho he has to build a dock now so she can come and visit??!?! Very intrigued to see if Etho does immediately build one. And if he does, we know he's down bad!!!

[valdomarx]

reminding me of that short trip where the third doctor and delgado!master swap bodies

the doctor starts a fight in jail, breaks three people's noses, and ends up chained to a wall

while the master enjoys a nice stroll in the fresh air and fixes jo's love life for her

[goonersaurus]

hey seeing The Frog On The Lilypad is one of my life’s greatest pleasures, ok?

[ferrarihamilton]

Begging on my knees for a snippet of frat yukierre 🧎🏼‍♀️

I REALLY THOUGHT I HAD CRACKED MY WRITERS BLOCK WITH THIS ONE. alas. here's almost 2k that hopefully i will finish one day, inspired by yuki's outfit back in miami:

Pierre does make a pros/cons spreadsheet when he’s keeping track of all his bids, and he talks to his parents and his older brothers but at the end of the day he picks his frat mostly based on which one played the least shit music during rush, which lands him in SigEp. It’s a good choice: the house is newly renovated with a pool, and they don’t make him do anything too awful or offensively American for pledge, thank fuck.

But most importantly, SigEp is on good terms with most of the sorority houses. This means every weekend Pierre gets to flirt with a pretty girl over beer pong and drink Rolling Rocks instead of Coors.

Their last mixer before finals is with ADPi, which he’s glad for: the ADPi girls are hot but not crazy, and the other frat there is SigNu, who are always a good mix of chill and rowdy. He does the rounds before things get too wild, dialing his smile up a notch when he says hello to the girls he already knows, leaning on his vowels as he lets himself get introduced to a gaggle of littles in identical neon bandeaus.

“Are you French?” one of them asks, eyes wide.

“Oui,” he says, patiently, and smirks as they all giggle again. Amy and Laura, behind them, simultaneously roll their eyes, and Pierre winks at them. He’s hooked up with both of them before— together and separately, and he wouldn’t be opposed to a repeat, but the night is still young. He’s in no hurry.

He’s finishing his third beer and flirting with a girl from his stats class when Charles— who isn’t even in Greek life, and somehow gets invited to most mixers all the same— appears next to him.

“Pierre, mate,” she says, in a tone that never means any good. The other girl makes herself scarce almost immediately, because Charles has a reputation for being sweet until she’s not. Pierre suppresses a sigh and turns to her.

“Hello Charles,” Pierre says drily. “Yes, I am good, thank you for asking. How are you?”

Charles flashes him a crinkly smile, either oblivious or uncaring of his sarcasm. “Have you met Yuki?” she asks in French.

“Who?”

Charles points over her shoulder at a guy on the other side of the room. He’s wearing a bright pink shirt in a shiny fabric, with matching shorts. “Yuki, he’s from Japan. He is a mech-E major.”

Pierre raises his eyebrows. He’s known Charles his entire life, and she’s never meddled with his hook ups before. “I think you are supposed to show me a girl, no? You will get in trouble with the ADPi board.” He still looks though, because why wouldn’t he. The guy’s back is turned to them, talking to some people around the beer pong sign-ups. “He’s not my type.”

Charles just grins and starts shouldering her way through the crowd. Pierre shakes his head, feeling a smile pull at his mouth, and grabs another beer before following her.

“Yuki!” Charles calls when they get close.

Yuki turns around, breaking into a smile when he catches sight of Charles. It’s a nice smile. He’s short— shorter than most of the girls here, even, with round, soft features and broad shoulders. He’s wearing a pink snapback backwards, and his shirt is unbuttoned all the way.

Pierre knows he’s staring. Next to him, he can feel Charles’ smugness radiating off of her.

“Hey Charles,” Yuki says, holding his fist out for a fistbump. Once Charles has knocked their knuckles together, he turns to Pierre, looking up through his eyelashes at expectantly. “I’m Yuki,” he says. His lower lip is pinker than the top one, like he’s been biting it. On a girl, Pierre would call his expression coy.

“Pierre.” Pierre’s mouth is dry. He can’t stop looking at the line of Yuki’s tummy where his shirt is open. He wonders if he slipped a hand there, if Yuki’s waist would feel as solid as it looks.

“I know,” Yuki says. “I was in Intro to Civil last year.”

Pierre had TA’d that class last year, a freshman paper. Which makes Yuki a sophomore. “But you’re a mech major?”

Yuki shrugs, his grin widening. “Guess you were a shit TA.”

Pierre surprises himself by laughing. Charles, who had stepped around Yuki to peer at the beer pong board, gives Pierre a shit-eating smile of delight and two thumbs up, before disappearing into the crowd.

Yuki’s beaming up at him now. It makes Pierre feel powerful, confident; he puts on his best smile and angles his body so he’s leaning against the wall, facing Yuki. “You’re with Sigma Nu?”

Yuki looks him up and down. His smile falls into something more private, and Pierre’s about to straighten up, thinking he read the situation wrong, when Yuki deadpans, “No, I’m with ADPi.”

Pierre relaxes, laughs again. “I mean,” he drawls. “You’re the right height.”

“Hey, oi!” Yuki shoves at his shoulder. He’s laughing too. Pierre’s already leaning against the wall, so the movement does nothing but bring Yuki closer to him. His hands feel sure, strong. He’s the perfect size to fit against Pierre’s side, under his arm.

He takes a sip of his drink, smirking. “And what are you wearing, all this pink and purple? Definitely a sorority girl.”

“I’m on theme.” Yuki waves at the rest of the room, decorated with LED lights and projections of city skylines for the vaporwave theme, whatever the fuck that means. “Unlike you. Lazy. Every other frat boy here is wearing a white graphic t-shirt too.”

“You live in a frat too,” Pierre points out. It’s hard to forget, with the way he looks: open shirt, shorts string untied at the hips, snapback and sunglasses and delicate chain on his collarbones.

"A better one," Yuki says, grinning.

“No way, your house is old as fuck. And we’ve got a pool.”

“Not all of us need a pool to get people wet,” Yuki says, straight-faced, and Pierre squawks, startled, before laughing so hard he’s basically crying. When he wipes his eyes, Yuki is watching him, the apples of his cheeks dimpled with how wide he’s smiling.

He ducks his head when Pierre catches him, picking up his drink again, and asks, “You’re from France?”

The change of subject is so cute that Pierre gives in, and slides an inch closer to Yuki so their arms are touching. He can feel the muscles in Yuki’s bicep jump, briefly, before he’s pressing back, warm and sweaty. “What gave it away?”

“Charles told me.”

“Ohhhh,” Pierre makes an exaggerated sound. “You were talking about me, were you?”

Yuki rolls his eyes. They're crowded close together in the packed room, though they still have to raise their voices to speak. Yuki's smirking a bit at him. From this angle, he has to tilt his chin almost all the way up to look at Pierre.

“Want to play beer pong?” Pierre asks. He feels hot under is collar, clammy at his armpits.

“Fuck yes,” Yuki says. It’s hard to tell under the dimmed lights, but it looks like he’s blushing, and he’d stumbled just a teeny bit before replying. Pierre puts his hand on his lower back, steers him to the end of the beer pong table.

They win, easily. The girls on the other side of the table pout, which Pierre is definitely going to get a word about from his chapter president in the morning: the unspoken rule is to let the girls sink some cups in, break the ice for conversation later, but Pierre is having too much fun listening to Yuki’s cheers every time he makes a shot, feeling his body next to his, sweaty in the packed room. When he sinks his third cup in a row, he wraps an arm around Yuki’s waist without thinking, lifts him up. His side is warm, and Yuki turns his face into his neck for a moment when he puts him down. Pierre can feel him grinning against his shoulder.

“Bravo, bravo.”

“We make a good team,” Pierre says.

“We?” Yuki shoots back. “I sunk more cups than you.”

“One more cup than me.”

“One more is still more. Better start practicing.” Yuki touches his wrist, easily, with warm fingers. Pierre has to lean down to hear him, which puts him right in line with the shock of his neon cap. He steals it, puts it backwards on himself.

“How do I look?”

“Like a frat boy,” Yuki says. He’s teasing, but he’s also fixing Pierre with the growing smile of someone who starting to realise they’re going to get laid tonight, so Pierre doesn’t mind much. He can feel a matching smile on his own face.

“Want another drink?”

Yuki gives him a once over, so deliberate. “Not really.”

It’s still pretty early. If Pierre was doing this, he’d draw it out a little, maybe talk to someone else for a bit, circle back around to Yuki when it got closer to midnight.

“SigNu house is a bit far from here,” he says.

“It’s like, 15 minutes.”

Pierre grins. “SigEp is 10.”

Yuki rolls his eyes. “Let me get a drink. Then we can go.”

“Thought you didn’t want another drink.”

“I realised I need another one to deal with you.”

Pierre grins again. He can’t stop; he feels a bit giddy. “I can get them. Meet you outside in five."

When they meet out the front, he says, “Here," innocently, and hands Yuki the White Claw he’d nicked from Amy’s secret stash.

Yuki rolls his eyes, but still says, “Thanks,” and cracks it open to chug immediately. He gets halfway before making a face.

“Don’t like it?”

“American alcohol sucks.” He eyes the fresh Coors in Pierre’s hand. “Do you actually like that?”

Pierre does have some taste, so of course he doesn’t. “We’re in the land of the free,” he says. “Need to get the full experience.”

Yuki snorts. It's unbearably cute.

“I do miss wine though,” Pierre says.

“Mmm,” Yuki says. “Have you been to the Connection? They have a good selection, for pretty cheap too.” “You’ll have to take me,” Pierre says.

Yuki raises an eyebrow, like it’s a challenge. “Okay.”

He’s still at the top of the porch, much too far away for Pierre’s liking. He’s taller than Pierre, now that Pierre’s standing two steps down.

“You’re cute,” Pierre says.

“You wear too much cologne.”

“Bro." Pierre sniffs his collar. "No I don’t.”

“You don’t,” Yuki says, smirking. “But you were worried for a second.”

Pierre can’t remember the last time he genuinely laughed this much at a mixer. He shoves Yuki a little, then has to lean forward to reel him back in when it looks like Yuki might lose his balance.

“That was so your fault,” Yuki accuses.

“You didn’t spill your drink,” Pierre says instead of denying it. They're very close now, enough that Pierre can smell the sugar of White Claw on Yuki's breath. Pierre’s still got his hands on his hip and shoulder from steadying him; his body is just as solid as Pierre thought it would be.

“I have priorities,” Yuki says, and there’s a beat of pause, and then Yuki’s leaning down and slotting their lips together, still smiling as he kisses him. Pierre shifts, tightening his grip as he kisses back, pulling Yuki down and straining up. He licks Yuki’s lower lip and catches it against his teeth.

When they pull apart, Pierre tries to dive back in immediately. Yuki steps away, still smiling. “Let’s go,” he says.  

[1800-fight-me]

Goddamn I'd be beyond full of their seed that it'd probably be seeping out of me for a week or so. Unless my hips are propped up to have gravity keep it all in me

oh holy fuck. uh yeah. need to be absolutely full of logan’s cum just stuffed to the brim. i just know the breeding kink goes wild with him. he’s gonna stuff any cum that leaks out back in with his thick fingers cause you can’t waste any of that cum, no he’s gotta keep you full of him

[lilacerull0]

curly haired girl rules <3333 can save the world actually <3333333

[chussyracing]

look i think in theory i'd love to see max and nando fighting but only for p19/p20

[sasquach-scratches]

So I defo got the Lich Kitty bio in the works but idk when I'll end up posting the whole thing cause 1. the actual art is very ambitious and I'll want to touch it up now and then instead of just dropping it as-is and 2. there's like 3 different versions of my Skyrim OCs so I gotta figure that out too lmaooooo

[yurchenko-full]

the whiplash I'm getting from watching meets that use three different codes this weekend

[thesearchforbluejello]

One of my top 5 complaints about things that happened in this show is that we finally get to see Cassandra in Rite of Passage after not having seen her since In The Line of Duty (1969 does not count) and she's AWFUL. Just because she's like 16 now does not mean she had to be like that. It's so incredibly unnecessary. It's like they took the opportunity to develop Cassie's relationship with Janet and Sam and just deliberately sabotaged it for no explainable reason.

[vivalasthedas]

taggart and jo were better together than jo and zane ever could be.

[one-little-nerd-stayed-home]

Mordin’s Genophage war crime buddy was last spotted near Urdnot territory you say? Ha. Ahaha cool. Super good and fine. I have no bad feelings about this at all. 

[pnutbutter-n-j-elyy]

When They're Drunk|Hyungline

Warnings: Mentioning of alcohol, Complete and utter shanagigans and tomfoolery

Maknaeline

Chan|

“Hehe.” You snapped your head back, looking for the owner of the noise that just blessed your ears. When you couldn’t find the perpetrator you turned back to cutting up vegetables for the soup you were making.

“Hehe.” 

You turn around again. Surely you couldn’t have imagined that. You sighed, shaking your head. Am I going crazy?

Not even a minute passed and you heard it once more.

“Hehe.” This time when you turned you felt your foot hit something soft and squishy.

Chris just side eyed the foot that just kicked his dimpled cheeks and then trailed those same beautiful brown eyes up to you.

“Christopher Bahng get up from the floor, that's nasty!” 

“Hehehehehe.” He continuously giggled as you stared down at him, not even trying to help him get up because you were confident in your inability to do so.

Instead you set aside the knife for your vegetables and slouched down on the floor as well.

“Hehehehehe.” 

“Whats so funny?”

“Carrot.”

You deadpanned at the Aussie in front of you and it sparked another fit of uncontrollable “hehe”’’s.

“Love, what on earth is so funny about carrots?”

His lips shot out into a kissy face as he shook his head. “You don- hehhehe - undertan-heheheh-the- jo-hehehe.”

You sighed as you watched him try- but fail in explaining what he thought was so funny about the crunchy orange vegetable.

“Chris, I think tonight is the last time you should ever drink alcohol, baby.”

Your boyfriend - fiance - looked at you, his dimples showing even more as the giggles kept coming out of him.

“But I had to celebrate!” He pulled your hand from off the ground and put it close to his face. He outlined the ring he had given you. “See? This is a cause for celebration.”

You couldn’t help but laugh as you watched the man in front you look at your ring as if he was staring at his laptop screen - with complete 100% undivided attention.

“Chris, you knew I was going to say yes to marrying you, baby. Who in their right mind wouldn’t say yes?”

“Mmmm…a lot of people. Hehe.” 

You got up from the ground, this time Chris coming up with you.

“Alcohol…it…hehe…hehe…hehe…” 

At this point, anyone would have been annoyed with this amount of giggling from a drunk person. But his giggle was so heartbreakingly adorable you couldn’t help but turn around and kiss the lips it was escaping from.

His eyes widened and he cocked his head. “Why…”

“Why did I kiss you?”

“Y-hehe.” He started laughing, his giggles becoming nearly uncontrollable to the point he started coughing- then gagging - then straight up heaving onto the kitchen counter.

Onto the vegetables you had been cutting up for dinner.

You let out an exasperated breath, all while keeping a smile on you face as Chris stared at you wide eyed.

“I didn’t mean to!” He whined, a small hiccup accompanying the sad gesture.

“I know you didn't, baby. You just giggled too much.” You said as you took a damp cloth and began wiping at his face - taking the opportunity to poke his dimple.

“I’m sorry…” His lip poked out in a pout.

“Don’t be. It mighttttt have been one of the reasons I fell for you so hard in the first place.

He smiled and looked out you lovingly as you continued to wipe his face.

This time you were the one to let out the giggle.

`````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````

Minho|

Minho was extremely drunk. You didn’t know how he got so carried away with his drinks. He usually was very careful with the amount of alcohol he ingested, just in case things were to potentially get out of hand and get leaked to the press. 

But even if it did get leaked- you know nothing bad would come of it. Because Minho was not an extreme drunk.

Unless he was extremely caring.

“Baby, you have to put a jacket on or else you’ll get cold.” Minho said as he stripped himself of his jacket and placed it over your shoulders. You chuckled as you took off the jacket, because you were sitting in the guys' dorms, and it was rather warm in there. 

Minho huffed and put his jacket over you again.

“Yah! Baby. You need to put my jacket on or else you’ll be cold.” He said his voice turned more stern in the slightest.

“Its hot in here though…”

“Thats just all the alc…ac..al…acl- thats because you drank too much, love.” His head was shaking as he gave a few tsk tsk sounds. “You had too much fun.”

You sure it was me who had too much fun?

When he turned away to walk to the kitchen you slipped off your cardigan so you’d be slightly less warm, and to make Minho happy by wearing his cologne stained jacket. You inhaled as you always did. His scent bringing every single thought of him to mind.

You smiled as Minho walked back into the living room on wobbly feet with Advil and water. 

“Baby take these. It will help when you’re hungover tomorrow.”

“I’m completely sober, love.” You say, laughter coating your voice. 

Minho groaned and hit his head like a frustrated toddler. “YA! Baby! You’ll be hungover tomorrow if you don’t take your medicine! Here. Here.” He said pushing the medicine into your hands. You tried handing them back but he just groaned. “You’re so stubborn when you’re drunk. I’m never letting you eat again” 

“Eat?”

“Drink I mean drink.” He said, looking up as if he was thinking. “Yeah, drink.” He poured out a few more advil but then the entire bottle fell and the medicine scattered across the floor.

“I can’t have my baby’s head hurt.” He said, shaking his own. He picked up a few medicine tablets of the ground and blew on them. Then he pat your head and shot up onto wobbly feet once more, making a beeline for the fridge to get you a snack, forgetting to hand you the medicine he intended to give you.

He came back with a tub of icecream and a spoon. “Here!” He pushed the tub into your hands, the warmth of his own contrasting with the frigid feel of the container.

As Minho placed both his hands on his knees as he knelt down in front of you, making sure you eat and take your advil, you couldn’t help but feel an overwhelming sense of love for your husband..

“Minho, can you take it first?” You stuck out your lip and gave your best pleading face. “I don’t like it but if you take it first I promise I will.” You said raising your hand.

Without question he swallowed a couple of pills, downing a good bit of the water.

“Anything for my babyyyyy.” He laid his chin in your lap and opened his mouth, waiting for you to spoon feed him. 

His lips wrapped around the spoon in a small “O” but pulled back with a big smile.

“Baby.” He said poking your leg. “And baby.” He said poking your tummy.

“And baby.” You said poking his nose. 

He gave a quick nod and opened his mouth again, as you pet his hair. Except this time he pulled back with a frown.

“Baby! Why are you drinking so much! YA YOU’RE PREGNANT YOU CAN’T DRINK.” He pulled his head off of your lap and was about to scold you again, but instead rushed up to get to the bathroom but made it as far as the kitchen sink before he let out the contents of his celebratory night.

He looked up after giving a long sigh, the exhaustion for the night hitting him almost immediately.

He whimpered and went to go hug you, putting his head on your shoulder. 

“I think I’m drunk…” He whined.

“And I think I’m pregnant.”

`````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````

Changbin|

“YAH!! WHY ARE YOU LOOOKING AT MY PARTNER?!” You had to hold Binnie back as he kicked his tiny little legs trying to get to the poor guy who had only glanced in your general direction.

“CHANGBIN JESUS, MARY, AND JOSEPH WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!” 

The angry little gym rat turned to you and pouted. “He looked at you.”

“Be so for real Bin.”

“I am. His eyes landed on you.”

You couldn’t help but laugh as Changbin deadpanned at you, and the guy quickly scurried away.

“Changbin you won’t bite, but you’ll sure as hell bark.”

“I will bite.”

“Really, now?”

Changbin nodded with determination. “Watch and learn.” He waddled up to his hyung and latched his teeth onto Christopher’s shoulder.

“HOLY SHIT-” Chris pulled away quickly and Changbin smiled a you. “I told you I bite!” He said as he mimicked the nerd and finger emoji combination.

Seungmin and Minho were laughing their asses off as Chris looked at your boyfriend horrified. The at you with a look of utter betrayal.

“Y/N… how could you even suggest that.” He said his eyes wide.

“I didn’t think he’d actually bite to be honest…”

Changbin waddled back over to you and latched his arm by your side. Looking around intently.

“What are you looking for baby?”

“Enemies. If another dares to look at my preciou- hnnnghh - Y/N I’ll rip their - hnnnghgh - face off.”

You all paused in the middle of the street, allowing Changbin a few minutes of fresh air and even breathing until his nausea passed.

“He gets really feisty when drunk, huh?” Felix asked as you guys all sat on the sidewalk, Minho patting the younger’s back while he bent over closer to the ground - even though with his height he was basically at the ground. 

“Yeah haha… I knew he was possessive but I didn’t expect him to be this possessive.”

Changbin looked up to a see a woman and her child walking and he yelled out again. “ARE YOU LOOKING AT MY PRECIOUS Y/N-IE???”

The woman looked at Changbin as if he was a psycho and ushered herself and her child off quickly.

Felix began to laugh which sparked a fit of laughter from all of the people. 

“He really does want to pick a fight with every single person that walks by.” Hyunjin commented as he shot a look towards a group of young kids walking towards you guys.

They saw a drunk man bent over and like the smart kids they were crossed the street.

“He’s a handful.” You groan as you lay back on the sidewalk. Not even considering the amount of germs on it. “But he’s my handful.”

“Quite literally too. Because he is about as small as Bangchan is old,  and Hyunjin is dramatic.” Seungmin commented without so much as a smile. You couldn’t help but laugh at how serious he was.

“YAH SEUNGMINNNNNNN!! WHY ARE YOU MAKING Y- HNNHNDKFH-” Before he could finish his sentence Changbin was throwing up and you got up to go help him.

“Y/N…I don’t feel good.” 

“I know baby, I know.” You said. 

“Why do people keep looking at you? I only want to look at you.” He said as you guys all continued that last final stretch to the dorm.

“I don’t know. Maybe because I’m pretty?”

“No. You’re beautiful theres a difference.”

You smiled and opened your mouth to ask what exactly about you was beautiful, but Changbin ripped himself from your arms and started rushing towards a middle aged man who was stepping out of a restaurant with his wife.

“YAHHHH!”

You groaned and rushed after your little angry toddler - vowing to never let him get this drunk again.

`````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````

Hyunjin|

Hyunjin sat across from you at the sports bar you guys were at. Seungmin had dragged you all along to watch the world series with him; and since you guys were in America you thought the Kids thought it would be a fun experience to experience an American sports bar.

Hyunjin had long since drunk his fair share of alcohol.

“Its not like in Korea…” He had said before he went down the rabbit hole of different beverages.

Chan had been glancing over in concern, but relaxed a little when he noticed how well you were taking care of your boyfriend.

You popped an onion ring in your mouth and Hyunjin was staring at the basket of fried goodness in front of you.“Do you like onions? Would you like one?”

Hyunjin shook his head- yet proceeded to grab one and place it on your ring finger, then placing one on his.

“See Jagiya? We’re married now.” He mumbled, his cheeks flushed, a beautiful but slightly concerning pink.

“Baby, I think its time we get you back to the hotel.” You informed Chris that you would be taking Hyunjin back.

“Are you sure thats safe? I can send another one of the guys with you-” You shook your head. “Okay. Just call me if you need anything?” 

“Of course Christopher. And don’t worry. I grew up in this city so I know my way around.” You say giving a friendly wink and helping Hyunjin up from his chair.

The night breeze was cool, and you figured it would help Hyunjin sober up slightly.

Which you were correct about, since about ¾ of the way back to the hotel he was coherent enough to make normal conversation - albeit his response time was somewhat slow and his answers slightly slurred.

You noticed a small group of girls lock eyes with you and widen them simultaneously.

“Jinnie. I think you have some fans.” You said, a smile appearing on your face as they slowly made their way over. You helped them get over their hesitation as you waved them over.

“We won’t bite!” You giggled.

They came up to you and seemed to struck to speak.

“I-Is that…you and Hyunjin?”

You chuckled. “Yeah we were going to go public soon, but they were trying to figure out how to break the news that Hyunjin was dating a staff member…but I assume a lot of you have peeped something out. Especially since we’ve been together over a year now. The only reason why we’ve decided to disclose at all is because you guys are so intuitive. Stay should the new FBI.” You joked. The girls immediately eased up and Hyunjin bowed to them, giving a slightly sloppy smile. 

“Can we get a picture?” One of the girls asked, you looked at Hyunjin but the girl corrected herself. “We meant like..with… both of you? You guys are adorable together!” You felt your heart almost burst at your first supporting fans of you and Jinnie’s relationship.

“Baby are you good to take a picture?”

He nodded- in a seeming state of almost complete soberness and posed happily for a few pictures with you and the stays.

“Are we allowed to post this?” One of them asked meekly.

“I would wait until JYP releases an official announcement of our relationship. But after that of course.” You dig in your purse and pull out a few photocards. “Here…I think Chris and…Seungmin signed these ones. And this one is… Binnie!” You said handing them the cards. “Baby…can you sign the cards too?”

Hyunjin nodded and signed the cards, and you heard one of the girls gasp in surprise.

Hyunjin still had the onion ring on his finger.

“Jinnie! Why the fuck-frick do you still have the onion ring on your finger?!” You asked in complete shock, correcting yourself in front of the girls.

“Because we’re married? Duh.” He said in complete seriousness. He bowed to the girls politely and then came up with force. “Remember when you post to caption Y/N as my wife. I’ll even let you take a picture with the rings too.” He nudged your shoulder, provoking you to stick out your hand as well, and the girls looking at each other with slight giggles as they all snapped pictures of your and Hyunjin’s hands.

Once they were finished they waved goodbye they scurried off in the opposite direction.

You let out a big guffaw. “I really hope you remember this Jinnie.”

~~~~

“Y/N? Why is there a picture of my hand with an onion ring going viral on social media?”

`````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````@abovenyx @wolfs-archive @oddracha @iyeeeverydee @parisanmorovati @seungmincenteric @panbish-1209

[nenan]

Jo photographed by Elle Hioe at Rico Nasty's concert

[muniimyg]

𐙚₊˚⊹ bbydaddy!yoongi (4) ⋆𐙚₊˚⊹

series m.list // taglist

🏷️ permanent taglist: @joonsjuice @pamzn @defzcl @whoa-jo @taetaecatboy @jksusawife @un06 @firesighgirl @rrosiitas @butterymin @parkinglot-nights @musicjournalsjdb @kissyfacekoo @jkslvsnella @vampcharxter @bloopkook @somehowukook @bbystarcandykoo @ddanasjk @luvismenu @remgeolli @parapiop7 @lil0u0 @crazyovayou @mggv97 @thvgukk @rpwprpwprpwprw

//

when yoongi calls to confirm the results of the blood test, reality hits all over again. 

you’re pregnant. 

his voice was gentle, with the same calm professionalism he uses with all his patients… but it couldn’t mask his genuine warmth as he told you the news. you want to believe he sounded excited but it was hard to tell. you settle for the telling warmth in his tone instead.

hearing it out loud brought a whole new set of feelings—joy, fear, and then something else: the unavoidable question of how you’d tell your friends.

having a clingy friendgroup is not for the weak. 

but having a clingy adult friend group—the kind who carve out time for you amidst career chaos, endless emails, and hectic schedules—is something else entirely. 

they’re the type who know what you’re thinking before you can even say it. the type who catch your tone shifting over text and who will show up unannounced if they don’t hear from you for a day. they mean well, but keeping things under wraps with them is practically impossible.

which is why telling them worries you. 

you can’t hide it.

you know you can’t.

truth be told, you don’t want to. they’re your friends and you love them to death. this baby is worth every second of celebration.

the thought had barely settled before it started to plague you.

how exactly do you explain this to a group of people who work together? who run a whole practice together? a group who’ll want to plan out everything with you, to fuss over you like you’re a ticking time bomb, and who—above all—will probably have a shitload of questions you don’t have answers to. 

they’re the people you’ve shared birthdays with, career changes, heartbreaks, and random tuesday nights. now you’re going to share this news, but there’s no manual on explaining an accidental pregnancy to your closest friends without it sounding like a rom-com gone wrong.

a part of you already know how they’ll react. 

they’d be thrilled, supportive, maybe a little over-the-top. 

and then confused.

yoongi?

as the father?

… what, when, where, and why?

not that he’s a bad guy or anything but simply because there were no (obvious) moments that led up to this…

regardless, it’s like you can almost hear jimin’s gasp, feel jin’s bear hug, and imagine hyemi tearing up before tackling you in her usual affectionate way.

they’ll want to be there for every step of this (probably more than you can handle) but that’s the beauty of having friends who genuinely make the time… friends who go out of their way to show up—not just when it’s convenient but because they want to. they’re the type who, as adults, choose each other over and over again despite life’s demands. 

you all take pride in being involved in each other’s lives—big moments, small moments, and now…

this moment.

but exactly how much is there to be proud of when you explain how nasty you and yoongi were with each other?

how this mess could’ve been avoided if you didn’t beg for him to creampie you?

yeah…

that’s a tough one.

as you’re still trying to figure out how to break the news, your timer dings.

you pull the last tray of brown butter oatmeal chocolate chip cookies from the oven, the warm smell of melted chocolate filling the kitchen. you set the tray down with a sigh, hoping a night of stress-baking will take the edge off. but before you can even start on another batch, there’s a knock at your door.

before you can think to answer, hyemi is already pushing it open, holding an expensive wine bottle aloft like a trophy, her eyes alight with excitement.

“hyemi—”

“wine night!” she grins, crossing the room without hesitation, snagging a cookie from the cooling tray as she pushes the wine bottle toward you.

you catch the label and gasp. a prized chateau margaux. the kind of bottle she probably saved up for weeks (or borrowed namjoon’s credit card) to buy.

“you did not…” you say, eyes wide.

“oh, but i did,” she giggles, giving you a wink. “thank you, namjoon.”

you shake your head, a smile tugging at the corner of your mouth. “i knew it.”

“well?” she nudges the bottle toward you. “what are you waiting for? let’s open this and—”

you hesitate, trying to find the words. “i… i can’t tonight… or for the next few months.”

her smile falters. she clutches the bottle closer, looking genuinely wounded.

“w-wait, what? but—i fought namjoon for this, you know? and you’ve wanted this bottle for forever!”

“hyemi, i have to tell you something—”

“are you breaking up with me?” she jokes, only half-serious as she takes another bite of her cookie.

you roll your eyes and grab the cookie back from her hand, taking a bite yourself.

“it’s not you, it’s me.”

she laughs, swiping the cookie back with a shrug. “so what is it? and holy shit, these cookies are insane—”

“i can’t drink.”

“why? you’ve gone to work hungover before.”

you struggle to find the words, fingers tightening slightly around the bottle in your hands.

“no, it’s not that. it’s… different.”

hyemi’s brow furrows, her eyes narrowing as she peers at you, picking up on your hesitation. “what? don’t tell me you’re on some sober cleanse or something.”

“no… hyemi, i…”

“i mean if you are, i totally support you. i just think there’s too much good wine in this world and not enough time—”

“i’m pregnant.”

hyemi’s jaw drops, her eyes widening. her mouth opens and closes in shock, but before she can get a word out, there’s a loud crash behind you both.

you whip around to see the rest of the guys standing at the doorway.

jimin is frozen, a shattered wine bottle at his feet, red liquid pooling across the entryway as he stares at you in wide-eyed disbelief.

your eyes lock with yoongi’s, who stands in the middle of the group, his expression soft and steady as he takes you in. he tilts his head, just slightly, a quiet, unspoken reassurance passing between you two. you can feel your heart hammering, cheeks burning as you try to focus on anything other than his gaze.

the silence stretches for a beat too long before taehyung breaks it. 

“mommy?”

this isn’t exactly how you pictured them reacting to the news. 

as you sit on your couch, the atmosphere feels heavy. they’re in disbelief, and the only way they know how to process it is by falling into their medical roles.

nam joon and jin, being the doctors they are, sit close to you and begin a quick physical assessment and blood pressure test.

nam joon carefully rolls up your sleeve, a comforting smile on his face that softens the tension in the room. 

“just relax your arm for me,” he hums, positioning the cuff around your upper arm. his fingers brush against your skin, and you can’t help but notice how professional he is, even amidst the whirlwind of emotions flooding the room.

“you’ve been feeling okay, right? any nausea or dizziness?” he asks, focusing intently on the task at hand.

“tired. sleepy. think i’m nauseous the most, though,” you admit. “i throw up… like every other day.”

he nods, squeezing the bulb to inflate the cuff. “that’s completely normal.” he pauses, glancing up at you. “are you okay? emotionally and mentally?”

you nod, glancing around the room. “i’m fine.” 

your eyes meet yoongi’s.

he’s seated directly across from you, leaning forward, elbows on his knees, fingers interlaced. he’s watching you intently, with his usual cool indifference masking an intensity in his gaze. yoongi’s quiet presence anchors you, even though he says nothing.

should he say something?

what does he even say?

you don’t know.

he doesn’t know either.

as the cuff tightens around your arm, you take a deep breath, catching the supportive glances from everyone else nearby. their chatter fades into the background as nam joon’s focus brings you back to the moment.

“okay, let’s see what we have here,” nam joon murmurs, watching the gauge as the cuff slowly deflates. “hmmm. your pressure’s a little high but good overall. are you stressed?”

“a little right now,” you exhale. “guys, this is too much—“

“did you just do a home pregnancy test or go to the doctor?”

you freeze.

“oh shit,” taehyung calls from the doorway. he’s just been helping jimin and hobi clean up spilled wine. “screw the pregnancy test stuff—i wanna know who the babydaddy is.”

from the back, you hear jimin and hobi laugh as they finish picking up glass shards. taehyung raises a teasing brow. 

“okay but seriously… didn’t know you wanted a baby that bad, ___. could’ve just asked jungkook to help you out.”

yoongi straightens, shooting taehyung a sharp look. “alright. we good here? you guys did a quick physical and checked her blood pressure—”

“your babydaddy is clean, right?” jimin chimes in, feigning seriousness. “___, i hope he’s worth the labor and delivery.”

“oh my god. shut up,” you say, rolling your eyes.

it’s then that you glance at hyemi, who sits on the other side of the couch with jungkook. the two of them are stress-eating your cookies, crumbs dotting the space between them.

hyemi, chocolate smeared at the corner of her mouth, raises a brow. “is this why you’ve been so sick?”

“yeah,” you nod. “i got the confirmation yesterday.”

“yesterday?” her eyes widen, and she sets down the cookie, scooting closer to you. “oh my god, ___. this is huge! congratulations!” she grabs your hands, her excitement lighting up her face. “we’re happy about this, right? you want this?”

before you can answer, she wraps her arms around you, pulling you into a tight hug. you let yourself sink into her warmth, feeling the tension unravel.

“yes, i want this. ahhh! don’t make me cry,” you whisper, fighting back tears as you pull back, smiling through it. “god, it’s the pregnancy hormones.”

“already?” she gives you a small, amused smile and wipes at her eyes, fixing your hair. “i’m just so happy for you, ___. you’re going to be the best mom. seriously.”

“as long as her blood pressure stays stable—”

hyemi swats at him. “nam joon, shut up, yeah?”

yoongi lets out a quiet chuckle, leaning back with his hands in his pockets as he watches everyone swarm around you. though he’s giving his usual cool exterior, there’s something in his eyes—a soft, almost possessive gleam that’s hard to miss.

from the corner, jungkook sneaks in, sliding a little closer to you. 

“so,” he begins with a grin, “guess i’ll have to start calling you a milf now, huh?”

yoongi stiffens, jaw clenching almost imperceptibly, his eyes narrowing at jungkook. the tension isn’t lost on you as jungkook’s shoulder brushes against yours, and yoongi shifts in his seat, his gaze hardening in a way that feels oddly protective.

“so, seriously… who’s the babydaddy?” taehyung drawls from across the room, folding his arms with an amused smirk. “he’s clean, right? or should we head to the clinic and run a few tests? just to keep you and baby safe… big news and all, so we’re just trying to make sense of it.”

“god, you’re all insane.” you huff.

“maybe let ___ breathe,” yoongi mutters instantly. his gaze flicking between you and jungkook with a faintly annoyed look. “yah, she just confirmed she’s pregnant. that’s it.”

“that’s it,” you sigh repeating him. then, feeling a small wave of relief. “and honestly, why are the nurses in this room so immature? who can i report you guys to?”

jimin, taehyung, and jungkook laugh. 

“our bosses,” they reply in unison, completely unbothered.

the warmth of their support fills the room. 

as you soak in the moment, hyemi’s watchful eyes drift to yoongi.

he’s now casually seated beside you, close enough that his knee brushes against yours. every now and then, his hand lightly hovers by your arm or shoulder, his touch lingering just a little longer each time. hyemi tilts her head, something slowly clicking in her mind.

“wait a second,” she says, raising a brow. “yoongi… did you know about ___’s pregnancy before the rest of us?”

the room quiets, all eyes shifting to yoongi. before he can answer, jungkook—oblivious to the weight of the question—leans forward. 

“oh shit… is that what her blood test was for at the clinic? i might’ve accidentally seen the paperwork but didn’t peek—thought she was low on iron or something.”

silence falls over the room, each of them piecing things together. one by one, their eyes dart between you and yoongi, confusion shifting to surprise until jin’s eyes widen with realization.

“…wait,” jin’s voice is soft but full of shock.

yoongi keeps his gaze steady on you. 

his expression softening as he takes your hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. his thumb brushes over your knuckles, a small smile tugging at his lips. it’s subtle but full of meaning, and you feel warmth pool in your chest, despite the tension.

then taehyung breaks the silence, his eyes wide, mouth slightly open as he points at yoongi with dawning realization.

“...daddy?”