#jj x reader fic

[vampiriito]

Summer was my first love (JJ Maybank x shy! kook! reader)

A/N: Hi loves! this is my first fic and i just wanna let you know that I'm open to any criticism, but i want you to be able to nice at the same time. This is inspired by my favorite author on here the lovely @featherandferns, her fic daylight was so good and i read all the parts in less than 2 hours. With that being said the plot is completely different but i recommend checking out her works too because she's very talented! this might be a bit long, i wanted to write a slow-burn. Let me know if i managed to do that (┬┬﹏┬┬)

Summary: After getting locked into a closet with a kook girl, JJ Maybank comes to the realization that his animosity towards the spoilt people living on Figure Eight doesn't have to apply to every single one of them.

"Fuck! Seriously?" JJ Maybank's blue eyes meet yours through the frame of your glasses as he sneers at the door which was now shut. Leaving you both stuck together in this small cramped closet. If you weren't panicked cause of the claustrophobic tendencies of your stupid brain, you definitely were now.

You were alone with your 3rd grade crush, and he had no idea, you were a kook, (which he hated,) and one hell of a wallflower person. You've been watching him from a far since you were 9, and it got a little weirder once you could walk around freely and just... take pictures with your camera as your hobby flourished. You were now, glancing shyly between the door and his face, 'he's probably feeling weird being stuck in here with a complete stranger.' you thought to your self, making sure to stick to your corner of the closet.

"What’s your name?" He demanded, his arms crossing over his chest as he leaned against the wall, his eyes flicking over you, studying you. Of course, he would ask that right away, JJ could be direct and kind of an ass most days. And he felt like if he wasn't gonna ask, you weren't gonna speak up first.

Of course he didn't know your name, he wasn't bordering on creepy stalker most days like you were in your free time. Across these years you managed to gather a lot on JJ surprisingly, being quiet and so reserved got you very far, going almost invisible when you went out. It didn't help you were a shutterbug, always taking pictures and people watching, "Y/n.." you responded softly and weakly, adjusting your glasses.

He raised an eyebrow, studying your face for a moment. That name sounded familiar, he could swear he'd heard it before somewhere, the only question was where.

"You're a kook, huh? I should have known." He grumbles, running a hand through his messy dirty blonde hair. You looked so.... soft, and it somehow made him scoff. He hated your kind more often than not, and here he was, stuck in a closet with one.

You nodded, frowning gently. You were aware of his hate and animosity towards the people living on figure 8, but you weren't exactly the picture perfect image of a snarky preppy kook girl. Or so you liked to think anyway.. He looked even more beautiful up close, more defined than what you usually saw through your camera lenses when photographing him. 'Suddenly i feel like a creep being here..' you thought, playing with the hem of your baggy sweater.

His eyes flicked down to your hands as you fidgeted with your sweater, his lips curling up into a subtle smirk. 'How can someone be so shy?' he thought to himself, wondering why you were so nervous.

"You look like you've never talked to a human before." He comments, letting out a soft scoff, and you flinch gently, your eyes snapping up to meet his. He noticed this and his smirk grew a little wider, enjoying that he was able to fluster you.

That's the most JJ thing he could say to someone like you. "i.. well, i don't talk usually." you face palmed internally at the way your words came out. You had the chance to come off as something you weren't given he didn't know you, and you weren't doing a very good job at it. You could've faked being confident and charm him, yet here you were talking like you never had anything to eat in your life.

He lets out a soft scoff as he watches you stumble over your words. There was something he found so weird about you, you were so… different from everyone he encountered on a daily basis. You were shy, quiet, and awkward, not like the sarcastic and arrogant persona that most kooks had. But, he tried to shake the thoughts away, he didn't need to be thinking about you this way, of all people.

"I can tell.." he responds, his accent ringing through slightly as his smirk turned into a slight frown.

There was an awkward silence that fell over the two of you in the cramped closet, the music that played throughout the party muffled by the thick walls. JJ glanced around for a moment, almost bored before his gaze settled back on you. His blue eyes studying you intently, trying to figure you out. The frown on his face remained, 'Why are you so shy?' he thought to himself, biting his tongue before he continued.

"What are you even doing here anyway? You don't seem like the type to be at a party.."

'Got dragged against my will by my very loud and obnoxious best friend here...' you thought to your self, the thought amusing you but of course not letting that mirror on your expression, "I'm sorry?" 'what? dumbass..' you scolded your self mentally. The question was loud and clear.

He raised an eyebrow as he looked you up and down for a moment, wondering if you always spoke in a quiet and awkward way, or if it was just because you were in a small, dark, and very cramped closet with a stranger.

"You heard me. I doubt you'd normally come to a party like this." He repeated, his frown returning to a small smirk as he pushed off the wall to take a hesitant step towards you.

Again, such a JJ thing to say. Your stomach jumped as he took a small step towards you, suppressing the urge to shift awkwardly. All you needed now was to look more awkward than you already were, you acted and sounded like a pathetic dumbass, in front of your childhood crush nonetheless. "i just ended up here.."

He took a few more steps until he stood a few feet away from you. He was towering over you, his 6’1 height compared to your, what he could only guess, 5.2 or 5.3 height. He had to admit, in some weird way, it was amusing being able to fluster you so easily. That was until he noticed there was nowhere really for you to go. The walls of the small closet caged you in, he was blocking your way out of the closet, unless you tried to push him out of the way.

He was quiet for a moment, just studying you as a small smirk returned to his face.

"There's nowhere for you to go.." he teased, taking another step closer, closing the gap between the two of you even more. He noticed you shiver gently and took note of it.

"Are you usually this weird with strangers?" you found yourself asking, surprising even yourself after the words left your mouth. 'caging me in like this wouldn't create a good first impression... he's just lucky I've been in love with him since i was 9.' you thought.

This time it was his turn to be surprised. He was definitely not expecting you to say something so blunt, you were full of surprises. He chuckled softly, taking another small step forward, effectively caging you against the wall. His smirk grew into a wide smile, his eyes studying you intently as he spoke.

"Only when I get stuck in a small crowded closet with them." He was now only a few inches away from you, his eyes studying your face. He was so close, you could take in some of his scent, which somehow matched perfectly with his personality. A mix of weed and the smell of the ocean and sunscreen. You could also now see little details in his face, like his freckled cheeks, and his jawline that looked hard enough to cut glass.

Being able to smell him was a pleasant feeling as weird as that sounded, his scent matching with the way he was completely. The small freckles scattered over his soft skin made you want to be able to take mental photographs. He looked breathtaking up close, even in the dim light of the closet. Like he was some kind of modern day demigod or some bullshit. You hummed gently, turning your body towards the door to try the door weakly, your hand wrapping around the door handle and shaking it with little to no force to actually get it open.

He chuckled at the sad attempt you made of trying to open the door, "It ain't going to open, believe me, I've already tried that." He said, his voice almost a murmur as he leaned against one of the walls of the closet, watching you struggle with the door. His eyes slowly traveled down from your face, down to your hips and to your beat up vans. Strange, he thought. He'd expect someone of your social status to have more expensive looking threads and shoes. Not like a librarian on vacation.

You side glanced up at him, adjusting your glasses. You felt absolutely wrecked, nerves and claustrophobia tugging at your sensitive stomach, it didn't help this closet was dimly lit and smelled like mold. 'What a great setting to interact in for the first time..' you thought bitterly, leaning your back against the wall opposite him.

He kept his eyes on your hips, letting his gaze rake over your body. He felt a weird and small pang of sympathy for you. You looked so small against the wall, and you looked like you were ready to jump out of your skin any moment now. It was different than when he usually had the unfortunate chance of speaking with a kook kid.

"Are you scared of small spaces or somethin' ?" He asked, his voice softer than usual as he spoke.

You nodded mutely in response, your expression probably resembling that of a deer in front of a truck. Sometimes you forgot JJ's voice carried a southern drawl to it, given he never spoke to you. You would hear him when he'd pass you in the school halls while talking to his friends animatedly or when he'd say something snarky in class to the teacher, his voice never directed towards you.

When you nodded, he mentally groaned. That was his luck. He ended up being stuck in here with a kook that was also terrified of small spaces. He let out a sigh, he would have to try and find a way to calm you down, since he was now stuck in this closet with you until whenever someone decided to let them out.

"How in the hell did you even manage to get yourself into a situation like this..?" He questioned, running a hand through his messy blonde hair.

You were asking yourself that question too, but i guess being so easy to push around wasn't really helping your case here. Truth was you were just a collateral victim of a prank which was meant for JJ, getting pushed into the small closet by mistake or just to make it worse for him by locking him up with a complete stranger.

You shook your head shrugging, chewing on your bottom lip nervously. You knew you had to say something, actual words at one point but your mind came up blank. Or your mouth wasn't able to say them out loud.

He let out another soft scoff, knowing deep down this was no accident. Some of his pogue buddies probably set this up just to screw around with him. Although, you didn't seem to know that. You looked genuinely clueless.

"My friends probably did this on purpose..."

He muttered, leaning against the opposite wall to you. He wasn't happy about this situation, especially not being locked in here with a girl for what could be hours. Which he would usually be elated about. But seeing you barely talked or moved, seemingly scared of loud sounds and sudden movements like a small animal, he was aware you weren't gonna makeout any time soon.

He looked you over again, his eyes roaming over your small and fidgety figure. In some weird way, he kind of felt bad for you. You looked so nervous and uncomfortable being stuffed in this dumb closet, and you looked like you didn't belong at this party in the first place.

"What were you even doing here anyway?... this ain't exactly a place a shy girl like you would go on your own free will..." he echoed the question once again, the curiosity and desire to fill the silence stronger than the fact that you were strangers.

"That's because it wasn't my own free will.." you spoke up in minutes of being almost completely silent, your voice small and weak.

He was both surprised and not surprised at your answer. He was surprised that you answered so quickly, but he could have guessed this wasn't your idea.

"Let me guess... one of your loud and obnoxious friends dragged you out here to try and get you to 'have fun'?"

Bingo! You nodded silently again, your eyes darting around his face taking in every detail, hopefully being able to recall every single one of them to draw or paint later.

He grumbled something under his breath. He knew it. From his experience, kooks were always so loud and overbearing. It was what he hated most about them, and yet, you didn't seem like that kind of girl at all... you were quiet and soft spoken, something he hadn't seen in a kook girl since... well, never really. "Figures.. can you not say no to them or somethin’ ?"

You stared at him silently, blinking as you raked your brain for what to say, your eyes narrowed just a hint. You were aware he usually spoke a lot but not this much. Or you were too quiet. You were also way too nervous to speak or think properly, having your lifetime crush speaking to you, like actually.

He was watching you intently, taking note of the expressions that flashed on your face as you tried to come up with an answer. You were obviously nervous, he didn't need to be a mind reader to know that. And there was something else about you... something he couldn't place his finger on. It was weird.

"You look like you're gonna pass out or something..." He commented, watching you closely.

You shook your head 'no', reaching to try the door again. You suddenly didn't feel so lucky you got this rare chance to speak and admire JJ shamelessly given you were stuck in a closet together. You were anxious and feeling like he could see right through you, see all the weird tendencies you had and judge you for being so pathetically in love with him for so long.

He chuckled softly as you tried to open the door, again and again. It honestly reminded him of a small animal trapped in a cage, frantically looking for a way out. Something about the way you were acting amused him. "There ain't no point trying to open it again, trust me, it's stuck good..."

JJ could tell you were anxious, and it was easy to guess why. It was probably terrifying being stuck in a small, dark, cramped closet with him of all people. And judging by how quiet and shy you were, this was probably one of the hardest social interactions you ever had.

"Jesus... can you even speak a full sentence?" He piped up after another few seconds of silence, his smirk returning to his face as he watched you struggle against the door.

You looked to the side, a small frown making its way on your face at his question. 'Not when you're so close to me that i can smell the sea salt water in your hair.' you groaned internally, still silent. You kept your eyes locked with his in the almost dark closet, scolding yourself for not being able to handle social interactions like normal people.

JJ's smirk widened at your expression, you looked like a kicked puppy, it was almost cute. He stood up straight, lazily pushing himself off the wall and slowly making his way towards you. When he was a few steps away from you, he stopped, looking you up and down with a hint of mockery.

"You're a real quiet thing, ain't ya?"

With a few more confident steps, he was now standing just in front of you, leaning his shoulder against the wall. He looked down at you again, his smirk still present on his face. You could almost feel the heat radiating off his body, him being so close. His ocean like scent mixed with the weed smell, filling the closet and making it even harder to breathe than it already was in here.

"You afraid of me or somethin'? "

"No.." your voice rung out without missing a beat this time, a soft and gentle sound as you frowned to your self. You were probably one of the few people who wasn't afraid of JJ. Years of following him from a distance and watching him closely took away the fear factor. If anything he'd probably be afraid of you.

JJ let out a quiet scoff at your answer, an odd response. He had expected you to be as afraid of him given the way you were acting. You were clearly nervous being in a small, dark, and cramped space with a man, yet you weren't afraid of him or his presence.

"You're an odd one then.." He said, his eyes roaming over you again, taking in your small, timid figure.

He was a few inches away from you, towering over your small frame. Being this close to you, he could see more details in your face. How your eyes were framed with small dark eyelashes behind your glasses, how your skin was unnaturally smooth and soft looking, and how your lips looked almost velvety, almost as if they were made of silk. In addition to that, your scent filled his nose now, mixing with his own and the smell of the closet. You actually smelled very good... which definitely wasn't something weird to be thinking. JJ found himself lost in thought the more he looked at you. You looked so... tender and yet the way you were acting, so nervous and small, you looked like a spooked stray dog. It didn't add up in his head, you were probably the first kook girl he had ever met that acted this way, it was making him curious. Just as he opened his mouth to ask something, a loud banging noise echoed from the other side of the door, making you jump slightly, surprised by the sudden sound.

The whole silent staring contest you both had going on was interrupted by a loud sound from the other side of the closet door, almost startling you to death given you were so focused on how beautiful JJ's eyes looked while he studied you intently. You sighed, squeezing your eyes shut for a second, adjusting your glasses and grimacing to yourself.

The sudden sound made JJ roll his eyes, whoever was on the other side of the door was clearly trying to be annoying.

"Oh come on..."

he grumbled, annoyed already by the person who was trying to interrupt. Before he could say anything else, the banging continued once again, this time twice as loud as before, making him grumble another curse underneath his breath. He was beyond annoyed now, a small scowl forming on his face at the constant knocking. He turned around, staring at the small closet door, his hands on his hips as he waited for the knocking again. He was about to say something, but just then, the door was suddenly swung open, making him nearly jump out of his skin.

He let out a surprised noise as he stumbled forward, nearly collapsing to the ground, but he managed to catch himself just at the last moment by grabbing the nearest thing which happened to be the closet wall, next to your head. His heart felt like it was about to burst out of his chest, he was breathing heavily, the unexpected event nearly giving him a heart attack. After a few moments he slowly looked up, turning his head to see who had opened the door.

To say he looked surprised would be an understatement. Standing in front of him was none other than one of his pogue buddies, John B, who was smiling and laughing like this was the most fun he had in forever as he looked down at JJ. JJ quickly managed to regain his composure, standing up straight before speaking up:

"Are you tryin' to give me a damn heart attack, John B?"

You were just as startled as JJ was, for a second time in less than 2 minutes nonetheless. Your gaze shifted from looking up at JJ's side profile to the boy standing in the door way of the closet. John B, JJ's best friend since forever, someone you also saw on a daily basis while doing your... usual checking up on JJ. John B also probably didn't know who you were, and you wouldn't be surprised even in the slightest.

John B looked between you and JJ, a smirk slowly forming on his face as his eyes landed on the proximity between the two of them. John B leaned against the door frame, his arms folded over his chest as he spoke up, a hint of mockery in his tone. "Seems like you got yourself into a situation, huh JJ?"

JJ's eyes narrowed at his best friends tone, he immediately knew what he was implying. He shot him a small glare before speaking up, a hint of annoyance in his voice

"Can it, John B... it ain't what it looks like."

John B chuckled at his response, he clearly didn't believe JJ given the awkward and somewhat embarrassing situation the two of you were in. "It sure looks like it though. Locked up in a closet together, all alone. You two got up to anything in here?"

Your eyes darted between the 2 best friends, adjusting your glasses as your gaze landed on John B, his teasing words making your face heat up. The implication of getting up to anything with JJ was enough to probably give 9 year old you a aneurysm, "Excuse me?" you spoke up, trying to sound irritated at his words although you sounded so weak and shy you regretted speaking instantly.

John B chuckled again at your response, clearly enjoying making you both uncomfortable. The way you spoke was so quiet and awkward, it was almost laughable. JJ continued to glare at him, trying to non-verbally tell his friend to shut his damn mouth, but it obviously wasn't working.

"Oh... I see, there's a voice under there, huh? You sound like a damn mouse, girl.. can you speak louder than a whisper?"

He continued to smirk at you, now mocking the softness of your voice. JJ grimaced at what John B had just told you, a pang of guilt suddenly shooting through his chest. He didn't like the way John B was talking to you, in fact, he was getting a little mad that he was being so rude.

"She ain't gotta speak louder. Leave her alone." JJ spoke up, glaring at his friend once again, finding himself defending this stranger.

You looked down, scowling to yourself at his question, now definitely not speaking another word for the rest of the conversation, knowing you'd just slip away once they were distracted. Your finger pushed the frame of your glasses up and down, your eyes fixed on your beat up sneakers. This was certainly one hell of a first impression.

John B held his hands up in mock surrender, clearly enjoying the fact that he was getting both you and JJ annoyed. "Relax man, I was just messing with the poor mouse."

He joked, his eyes still on you, now watching your fiddling. JJ just scowled at him again, silently debating punching his friend square in the nose. The fact that he was making fun of you was bothering him more than it should. He was used to his friend making stupid jokes and being a dick, but he couldn't stand the thought of him mocking you, especially since you were acting nothing but polite and shy.

Mouse? you could see the resemblance i guess, with the small one word answers which sounded like small squeaks from the anxiety. Still, John B was being kind of a dick at the moment which caused your frown to deepen as you debated just making a run for it and disappearing.

John B chuckled quietly, not taking his eyes off you as you fiddled with your glasses. He knew he was being a dick, but he was just enjoying it too much. He suddenly had an idea in his mind, a way to further piss off JJ. With a sly smirk on his face, he spoke again, this time, directed solely at you, ignoring JJ completely. "So, mouse, what's your name?"

'Seriously? neither of them know my name?' you groaned internally, looking up to lock eyes with John B nervously. In moments like these you wished you had at least a bit of semblance of a back bone, and not just clam up like a dumbass, "Y/n.." you answered simply, your expression twitching slightly from having to repeat your name once again. You wanted to roll your eyes in annoyance so badly.

There was something about the way you said your name that made JJ's heart stutter in a way it never had before. It sounded almost magical coming out of your small lips, it was so... mellow, and yet so beautiful. John B's smile widened at your answer, obviously not expecting to get an actual answer and a name at that.

"Huh... nice name. Suits you." He said, his eyes roaming over you again, studying your face to figure out if he knew you or not. He came up blank, probably due to being tipsy.

JJ continued to stay silent, watching the interaction between his best friend and you. He was feeling a weird mix of anger and curiosity as he watched. You looked so much more fragile and unthreatening than he had thought. You were like a small cat, a cute but easily spooked cat. Or maybe a mouse, he wasn't sure which.

You felt awkward suddenly, the 3 of you going silent save from the music coming from downstairs after John B's comment about your name. You looked between them momentarily before stepping forward shyly to signal John B to move out the way so you could escape this weird and sufficiently awkward situation at once.

John B chuckled again as you stepped forward, his eyes following your every move. But just as you were about to slip out of the closet, he suddenly reached a hand out, blocking your way.

"Where do you think you're going, mouse?"

JJ furrowed his eyebrows at his friend's behaviour, he knew exactly what he was trying to do. He was trying to annoy both of you, as well as prevent you from getting away. JJ had had just about enough

"Okay, that's enough John B. Don't you think you've teased the poor girl enough?"

John B sighed dramatically, pouting at JJ's annoyed response. He took a small step back, opening up the doorway once again "You're no fun. I was just having a little fun. Don't take it so seriously, JJ."

As much you enjoyed being in JJ's presence you hated social interactions and you wanted to just find your best friend to tell her that this was a bad idea and you should just skate home. So you took a final glance at JJ, before stepping out of the small cramped closet when John B removed his arm which was blocking your way hesitantly. But stepping out wasn't any better cause you were met with the party, still in full throttle, the music making your head feel weird, weirder than being stuck in a moldy closet with your childhood crush. There were less people on the floor you were on, but it was still crowded enough by drunken couples and some rowdy friend groups to make you feel anxious. This was most definitely a bad idea.

JJ watched you step out of the closet, a small pang of guilt shooting through his chest from knowing you were uncomfortable but now having no way to help the situation. He shot a glare at John B for the 10th time in the last 5 minutes through the doorway, silently warning his friend once again.

"You're a damn dick man. Why did you feel the need to be so rude to her?"

John B just shrugged, looking back at JJ with a sly smile as he replied "Because I thought it would be funny. Besides, I didn't think she'd answer me. I thought she was mute or something."

JJ grimaced, of course John B would find making fun of the shyest person he had ever met, fun. He pinched the bridge of his nose, groaning quietly. He took a deep breath before speaking up again:

"You really can be an annoying bastard, you know that? Sometimes i wonder how you even manage to speak with girls.."

You weaved through the mass of people at the house party, bumping into couples getting busy and grimacing in apology, trying not to stumble over your feet in the cramped space on the staircase. You quickly descended down the stairs, looking for your friend Maisy, to scold her for bringing you here in the first place. Suddenly, a hand on your shoulder stopped you in your tracks. A hand that you recognized, and yet dreaded at the same time. JJ had followed you, and was now stood next to you at the bottom of the stairs.

He gently grabbed your hand, stopping you from walking away. His hand was calloused and rough from years of surfing, yet warm. He spoke up, trying to get your attention over the loud R&B music blaring from the speakers. "Can I talk to you for a second?"

You tensed up from the sudden contact and because well, you thought someone else was grabbing you to pull yet another dumb prank on you, not expecting JJ to follow you and try to talk to you. You shook your head 'no' because as much as you wanted to spend time with him, you knew you'd just clam up and make it weird because this was JJ and you were you.

He noticed how tense you suddenly became once his hand touched you, he couldn't help but silently worry in his head. He wanted to sigh at your immediate response of shaking your head no, but he decided to persist a little more despite not having any reason to:

"Please? I promise I won't make fun of you or anything. I just wanna talk."

"Well, i need to find my friend." you find yourself speaking, although you weren't sure if he heard you over the music or the myriad of sounds and things going on in this house. Really, it was surprising how the neighbors hadn't called the police yet.

JJ leaned closer to you, trying to hear your soft spoken words. He could just barely make out what you had said, but he heard it enough. He looked around for a moment, searching for your friend but not seeing them anywhere in the crowd. But it was a given, since he didn't even know who he was looking for. "Where is your friend? I'll help you look for them."

You shrugged, because you had the same question. Where the hell was Maisy anyway? she disappeared and expected you to what? have fun and party? as if you could do that. Your eyes were fixed on JJ's face, the one you knew and loved through the years, anxiously shifting on your feet at the feel of his big hand still wrapped around your wrist, stopping you from scurrying away.

JJ could sense your anxiousness, he could practically feel the anxious energy coming off your small frame. He subconsciously let his thumb slowly and gently caress your wrist, an attempt to somehow soothe you, even if only slightly. He didn’t like seeing you so anxious.

He suddenly realized that he was still holding your arm, gently keeping you by his side and preventing you from slipping away in the chaos of the house party. He had forgotten in the moment. He looked down at his hand on your arm, "Maybe they went outside.."

You could call her! yeah, you could do that... but what if big mouth Maisy actually showed up and saw JJ Maybank, the dude you had been crushing on since you were a 3rd grader, holding your wrist and actually speaking to you? She'll make this awkward and run her mouth, possibly getting you rejected at the same time. So, you thought it was best to just let him speak to you and then leave you to look for her alone. "What do you wanna talk about with me?" you asked, still quietly, hoping and praying he'd hear you and that you didn't come off as rude.

JJ was a little surprised at the fact that you still stayed by his side after he suggested looking for your friend. He honestly thought you would run off. He mentally shrugged, taking the opportunity to talk to you even more. He turned slightly to look down at you as you spoke, leaning forward to hear you better.

His heart skipped a beat as he heard your quiet voice. That same feeling of both guilt and curiosity ran through him again. How could one voice be so soft and quiet, yet so beautiful at the same time? The thought confused and intrigued him.

He took a moment to register that you had asked him a question, the shock of you actually talking to him making his brain fry for a second or two. He quickly brought himself back to reality, realising that he had to reply.

"I just wanted to apologize. About John B i mean, he's a massive dick, no doubt about that. I told him off.."

"It's okay.." you mumbled smiling slightly, adjusting your glasses with the hand that wasn't in JJ's grip. You actually managed to hold the conversation normally, albeit you were still squeaking out your words.

JJ's eyebrows raised at your smile, his eyes widening slightly. He wasn't expecting you to smile as an answer to his apology, it was the last reaction he had expected. And yet, it was a welcome one. It made him feel better, deep down he felt guilty for his friend's behavior.

He stared at you for another moment, the hand he was using to hold your wrist moving once again, his thumb still slowly caressing your skin. He hadn't even noticed he was doing it this time.

JJ quickly snapped out of the little trance and cleared his throat, speaking up again. He didn’t want to make things weird and freak you out. He could feel John B’s eyes on him, he knew the bastard was watching him from the top of the stairs and silently giggling about the whole thing. He pushed down his annoyance, his eyes moving away from your face and around the room, looking at the other people gathered around them. "You said this party was your friend’s idea, right?"

You nodded silently, glancing around the room for your stupid best friend. You were gonna kill Maisy for disappearing on you like this, especially at a party of this calibre. You tried to ignore how JJ was still holding onto your wrist, now rubbing his thumb over your skin to probably soothe you. It made you feel more nervous and anxious, the urge to bolt even more strong now. You didn't wanna mess it up and make it awkward or worse come off as a creep by staring at him or saying something stupid, although the last part was impossible given you barely spoke.

JJ bit the inside of his cheek as you silently nodded back to his question. He was starting to realize how hard you were to talk to, how shy you were. It made him feel bad. He found himself wishing that he could just hear your voice just a little louder. It was so gentle. It made him want to hear more of it, but he had no idea how to get you to speak more without making you uncomfortable.

He quickly stopped himself from thinking any further, realizing that he was starting to sound like a creep in his own head.

They stood there silently for a couple more seconds, as JJ desperately tried to think of something to say to break the silence without making things weird. He could still feel John B’s eyes on him, silently watching the whole situation and probably having the time of his life.

"So...how come I've never seen you around at school before? "

He tried, even though he knew the answer. He just needed to get you talking.

Ouch. You saw him at school all the time, even took routes around the school just to get to pass by him in the halls and hear him talk so loudly to his friends and laugh. So the question stung a little. You looked up at him, shrugging your shoulders, narrowing your eyes and blinking a couple of times, your brain desperately trying to just block out the sound of the music which was making your lungs feel like they were being shaken up.

JJ mentally cringed as he saw the slightly hurt look in your eyes, he regretted his choice of question immediately. Stupid. Of course you were at school, he saw you at school, he just never seen you with anyone.

He winced as he heard that music change to something even louder. The constant music was starting to grate his nerves.

"Can we go outside for a second? I can't even freaking hear myself think in here."

Your brows furrowed, considering his suggestion. It was a good idea, you could call Maisy, maybe have a cigarette too and let your ears get a break from this loud music blaring in them. So you nodded hesitantly, glancing around one last time in case you magically spotted your best friend.

JJ let out a breath of relief when you nodded your head in agreement. He was glad he didn’t have to try and shout over the music anymore. He turned, pulling gently on your wrist to lead you toward the front door. He weaved through people, avoiding getting into conversations. He was determined to get you alone outside so he could talk to you.

Finally, they made it outside. JJ released your wrist as they reached the front door. He took a deep breath, enjoying the sudden lack of music and the relative quiet (well, aside from the still loud music coming from inside). JJ took a step away from you as he turned to face you.

"Thank god, I thought my ears were gonna bleed with that damn music in there."

'Yeah..' you agreed mentally once again, nodding with a small smile and adjusting your glasses as you stood on the porch, finally able to breathe fresh air, a stark contrast from the muted and sweaty smelling air inside. You needed to start saying words out loud, instead of just answering in your mind.

JJ leaned against the porch railing, stuffing his hands into his pockets. The air was much cooler outside, compared to the stuffy heat that was present inside.

He took a few seconds to study you as you stood across from him. The light from the porch made you look even more softer, if that was even possible. You looked so small in that moment, it made him wonder how you had managed to make it to high school.

He shook himself out of his thoughts, clearing his throat before speaking up again. He couldn’t believe that he was actually talking to you, and the fact that he hadn’t messed it up yet was a surprise to him. He didn’t want to think about how bad he would screw it up in the future.

"So uh...wanna explain why you were hiding in a closet? "

There. A question to get the conversation going. He mentally cursed himself in his head, realizing how stupid the question sounded.

"I got pushed in at the same time as you." You found the courage to speak yay! and not so shaky and quiet either. Maybe it was the fact that he thought you were just hiding in the moldy closet, like an actual mouse, which made you wanna defend yourself. That's what was missing from this situation, for him to think you were an actual dumbass who was hiding in a closet because she was afraid of party sounds.

JJ found himself chuckling, raising an eyebrow at your answer. He didn’t expect that particular answer, he was expecting you to say that you just decided to hide in the closest instead of socializing. But pushed in? He could actually believe that. "Damn. Got pushed into a closet with me? That’s gotta be some pretty shitty luck."

'I'd like to think it was kinda lucky of me to get pushed in with you, of all people...' you laughed internally. You glanced at him, tearing your eyes from the street in front of the house, narrowing your eyes at his words, but deciding to just stay silent. It was better than saying something to counter it or even worse.. to try and be funny and fail.

JJ’s eyebrows nearly raised at the sound of your small, quiet laugh. He hadn’t expected you to laugh at his joke, he was actually surprised that you had responded at all. That laugh was definitely enough to make him keep going to get that sweet, soft sound to come back.

“You know, you have a really pretty laugh..“ The sentence was out of his mouth before he could even realize it. He internally winced, hoping he hadn’t just made things weird by complimenting you. Not that he didn't compliment girls usually. If anything, that's how he managed to score in the first place. But in your case he wasn't trying to flatter you to get in your pants. He simply found you interesting.

You could feel yourself blush at his compliment, not realizing you actually laughed out-loud instead of just thinking about it in your head. You scolded yourself internally for reacting to such a casual sentence, he was just being nice after all, not asking you to marry him. "Thanks." you managed to mutter out quietly, hoping it sounded at least a tad bit grateful, and not rude and clipped.

JJ’s heart skipped a beat when he saw that adorable blush on your face. He had never seen you so expressive yet quiet at the same time since he'd met you less than an hour ago. He silently smirked to himself, now he knew how to make you blush. He mentally noted that fact down for later. The fact that you had mumbled out a simple “thanks” in response, just made everything even better for him. He would take anything you responded with, just so he could get you to keep talking and hear that angelic voice.

He shifted against the railing, his hand moving to his back pocket to pull out a pack of cigarettes. He quickly took one out, putting it between his lips. He glanced down at you as he pulled out a lighter to light the cigarette.

He held the pack out to you, silently offering you a cigarette as well. Which as he did, he realized that it wasn't really the epitome of smooth or romantic. But he already had his hand out stretched. JJ was becoming annoyed at himself for overthinking his every move, feeling like he was losing his footing on a ground he'd navigated countless times.

A small amused grimace made its way on your face despite trying to stop it, silently debating if you should take a cigarette. You pulled out your own lighter, stepping a little closer, not too much to look weird, lighting his cigarette before taking one for yourself. 'Wow.. so confident, lighting his cigarette for him.' you quipped sardonically in your head as you lit the cigarette for your self and took a long drag from it.

JJ’s eyes widened a little in surprise when you stepped closer to him, so close that you could reach out and touch him, if you wanted to. He watched you flick your lighter on, a small wave of excitement rushing through him as you held the light to his cigarette. He leaned his head forward slightly, putting the other end of the cigarette to his mouth and taking a drag. He exhaled the smoke as he watched you light your own cigarette.

He almost laughed when he saw the small grimace that came across your face.

He took another drag of the cigarette, his eyes studying the features of your face. You looked so beautiful like this, in the soft light of the porch with a cigarette between your lips. It was enough for him to realize that he wanted to see you like this more - not just tonight but anytime he could.

He turned away slightly as he exhaled the smoke, trying to calm his thoughts once again. He didn’t know you and yet here he was, already getting addicted to being close to you and hearing you talk.

The cigarette was a welcome relief given the fact that you were on edge since you came to the stupid party, leaning on the railing and taking long drags to fill your lungs with the smoke, the nicotine swirling around in your brain. Here you were, smoking a cigarette casually with the guy you were pinning after for years. 3rd grade you would probably faint and break her glasses in 2 if she knew.

JJ silently watched how you exhaled the smoke that was going into your lungs. It was hypnotizing watching you do this, something about it just made him want to keep watching. It was just so oddly satisfying to watch you smoke. He knew it probably wasn’t, but he didn’t care in that moment. It was oddly pleasing in a way he couldn’t explain.

He took another drag, letting the cigarette sit between his lips as he spoke. "You smoke often?"

"Yeah.. helps with the whole social anxiety thing.." you nodded your words followed by a small dry chuckle as you side glanced at him, exhaling the smoke to the side to avoid blowing it directly in his face.

JJ couldn’t help but notice the little side glance at him. That action, for some reason, made his stomach flip and flutter like it had a mind of its own, the way your eyes fixed on him momentarily making him nervous for some reason. A small smirk formed on his face as he blew out his own puff of smoke.

"Social anxiety, huh?"

He took another drag of the cigarette, his eyes looking straight at you as he did. He chuckled slightly, he never thought you would be the type to suffer from social anxiety, mostly because of his prejudice towards your social status. You had always seemed so quiet and reserved, but he never assumed it was because of that. But, as he looked at you now, taking a puff of your cigarette and shyly glancing at him every so often, he was starting to realize that maybe social anxiety made sense. The thought made him realize that he really didn’t know you at all, and that he desperately wanted to change that.

He leaned against the railing once again, taking another drag from the cigarette as he decided on what to say next.

Before he had the chance to do so, none other than your best friend Maisy, burst through the front door, her eyes fixed on you and probably not noticing JJ at first, "Y/n/n! where have you been, girl? You just missed the whole ordeal with Maybank getting locked in a closet with some random girl. It was so crazy.. I looked for you so i could tell you all about it!" she gasped excitedly as she clasped her hands on your shoulders, her loud voice and sudden appearance startling you and JJ. She could not, for the life of her read the room. Ever.

JJ’s eyes immediately went from you to Maisy, he was going to attempt to make more conversation until your best friend burst through the door.

He stiffened at hearing his last name, instantly tensing at what Maisy had said, now staring at the strawberry blonde mess of hair when she stepped in front of him to grab your shoulders.

You cleared your throat awkwardly, glancing over Maisy's shoulder to signal JJ's presence, glaring at her subtly. You didn't want her to say something stupid and reveal your feelings by mistake and embarrass you in front of him. Maisy’s eyes suddenly widened as she realized that she had walked out in the middle of a conversation you having with someone. She followed your gaze and looked over her shoulder, noticing JJ for the first time.

She gasped as her eyes widened even more, her look of surprise quickly turning into a smirk as she glanced back and forth from JJ to you.

You shook your head as if to say, 'don't, i'll kill you.

Maisy, the best friend she was, completely forgot about the look you had given her and the silent threat you were trying to convey in seconds upon receiving it. She had suddenly realized that you were standing beside JJ by yourself, and she was about to take full advantage of the situation. She smirked at you and wiggled her eyebrows dramatically, silently teasing you in her own way.

"Maisy. Please." you widened your eyes, silently scolding her and desperately suppressing the urge to groan out loud. Maisy was well aware of your MASSIVE years long crush on JJ, and you knew she was happy about this, in her own way, of course.

Maisy’s smirk grew as she saw how you widened your eyes and silently begged her not to say anything. She knew how big of a crush you had on JJ and how long you had wanted a moment like this. She was going to make the most of this.

She feigned innocence, silently raising an eyebrow at you as if to say "what".

JJ glanced back and forth between the two of you, picking up on the tension that he couldn’t fully understand. He glanced at you, noticing the look in your eyes as you looked at your friend. He could almost feel the pleading in your eyes, silently begging her not to say anything.

He looked at your friend, catching the smirk that was on her face. He silently tried to figure out what was going on. What was going through the mind of your bratty friend in that moment?

Mimsy glanced at JJ, noticing the curious look he had on his face. She couldn’t help but tease her friend, this was a once lifetime chance and she wasn’t going to pass up on the opportunity to tease her just a little.

She continued her innocent look as she turned back to you. She smirked as she leaned her head in your direction, acting as if she was going to whisper something into your ear. But instead, she spoke loudly, making sure JJ could hear her too. She loved tormenting you just a bit too much.

"You're alone with JJ Maybank of all people. How does it feel?"

Maisy said, a sly grin on her face as she watched your reaction. She was enjoying messing with you and making a fool of you in front of the guy that you liked a little too much for her liking. She didn't care, she loved embarrassing you. It was a friend’s right to tease their other friend in front of a potential love interest, right?

"Embarrassing, given you're here now." you glared at her, probably the most expressive JJ had seen you since you started speaking in the closet. A small sigh escaped your lips and you barely contained the urge to face-palm dramatically.

Maisy let out a loud gasp, acting as if she was offended by your words. She put her hand over her heart, a dramatic look crossing her face as she spoke. She was really enjoying this just so she could get a reaction out of you, which in turn would get a reaction out of JJ.

“Oh, wow. You’re being a bit rude, aren’t you? I can’t believe you’d say that in front of JJ. So insulting.”

JJ let out a stifled laugh as your friend dramatically pretended to be offended. He couldn’t help but find her antics amusing as he watched the whole scene unfold in front of his eyes. But he really couldn’t help but notice the glare you gave to your friend. It was the most expressive facial expression he had seen you wear so far, and he had to admit that he rather liked it. There was something about you standing up for yourself that he found attractive, even if it was just in a small way.

"And also I'm gonna kill you for ditching me like that.. " you added quietly, slapping Maisy's shoulder teasingly even though you were still glaring at her.

Misy let out another gasp as you slapped her shoulder. She feigned a look of pain on her face as she dramatically winced and rubbed the spot where you had slapped her in a playful way. She let out a loud melodramatic "ow". Clearly she was just messing with you at this point.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to ditch you. I just had to do something REALLLLYYY important." she countered, her words dripping with suggestive undertones rather than genuine apology.

"Like?" you raised one brow, feigning annoyance.

Maisy shrugged her shoulders slightly, trying her best to look innocent. It was all an act, and she was enjoying it so much. She loved getting a rise out of you just so she could see the way you reacted and how you acted in front of JJ. In another world, she would’ve been a professional drama actor with the way she was able to act so well.

"Just something..., you know. The usual. Important, fun, necessary stuff."

"You need to drive me home. I hate this stupid party." you put out your cigarette, sighing and groaning out loud this time as you adjusted your glasses, leaning away from the railing.

Your best friend laughed at your irritation. She knew that you hated parties and that you dreaded them, that’s why she’d convinced you to come to this one in the first place. It was just her way of being a good friend.

"Alright, alright. Stop being such a prude. I’ll take you home, you baby. Just let me say 'bye' to a few people first. You’re such a buzzkill, you know that?"

"Ugh Maisy.. you're just gonna take forever." you groaned once again at the thought of having to follow her around while she bid her never-ending goodbyes.

"I'll just skate home. Where's your car? i left my board in there." at that point, given how quiet JJ was you forgot momentarily that he was there, speaking freely and more expressively.

Misy raised her eyebrows dramatically as you mentioned skating home. If there was one thing she hated more than parties, it was your habit of skating everywhere. It was like you were allergic to cars. She let out a fake gasp and dramatically put her hand on her chest like she had been wounded.

“Skate home this late!? Alone!? You’re joking right?”

"Unlock the car. I can see it from here." you deadpanned, wanting to get this over with as soon as possible, nodding towards her car parked a bit messily on the lawn of the house.

Maisy scoffed and turned towards where her car was parked. She pulled out her keys out of her pocket and unlocked the car.

“Ugh. Fine. But if you get kidnapped or murdered, I’m not taking the blame. You’re such a pain, you know that right?”

"Bye... I'll see you tomorrow when you're hung over." you waved a hand in her face dramatically, the gesture sarcastic.

Maisy rolled her eyes at your sarcastic wave. She couldn’t help but smirk at how much of a pain you were being. She put a hand on her hip, raising an eyebrow at you in a sarcastic way.

“Ugh, thanks for that. I look forward to your sarcastic and overly annoying comments in the morning. See you, baby.”

With that she turned on her heel and walked back into the house, heading back into the party with a smirk still on her face. She was beyond satisfied with herself. She had pushed your buttons enough for you to be a bit more expressive in front of JJ and get a reaction from both you and him. It was one of her favorite pastimes to see you flustered and a bit irritated just at her presence.

The moment she disappeared inside, the only person left outside on the porch was you and JJ.

After Maisy had gone back inside, the porch suddenly felt much quieter than before. The only sounds heard were the crickets in the background and the muffled noise from the party inside. JJ glanced over at you, his eyes studying your face once again. He couldn’t help but notice the change in your demeanor the moment your annoying friend left.

As soon as your best friend left you were aware that you were alone with JJ again. You glanced at him adjusting your glasses nervously, "sorry about that.."

JJ couldn’t help but chuckle slightly as you nervously adjusted your glasses the moment you realised you were alone with him. He raised an eyebrow as he leaned against the railing of the porch once again, his gaze fixed on you.

"No need to apologize. Your friend is… something else.”

Back to clamming up like a dumbass you go. You nodded silently, a small apologetic smile tugging at your lips. You were going to skate home, but you weren't sure how to.. end the conversation with JJ? should you just leave? wave at him? no... that's too casual, he doesn't even know you. Saying bye felt pathetic.

JJ chuckled again as you fell back into your shy, nervous demeanor. He could tell that you were overthinking the entire situation in the moment, trying to find the right way to leave. He thought that you looked so awkward and nervous. It was almost cute how unsure of yourself you were.

He pushed himself off the railing and took a step towards you.

"You’re still gonna skate home?"

You hummed faintly and nodded, looking out to Maisy's car. You didn't hate the idea of skating home, given you had your earphones with you and you could just take a shortcut to your house from here.

He couldn't help but smirk slightly as you hummed weakly and nodded. He took a couple more steps towards you, closing the gap between the two of you completely. He stood right in front of you, looking down at you with a raised eyebrow. "Not afraid of being kidnapped or murdered like your friend said?"

"I skate at night pretty often." you stated as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, your voice back to its quiet and soft tone again.

JJ smirked even more as you stated your regular night time skating routine as if it was natural. He let out an amused chuckle, his eyebrows raising at the idea of you skating home alone in the dark so often.

"You skate at night often? You must have a death wish, doll."

You furrowed your brows at his nickname, whipping your head to look up at him with an expression resembling confusion. It was mostly to hide how flustered it made you, a small frown forming on your face, which wasn't supposed to be rude in any way, you were just... thrown off.

He smirked as you whipped your head up to look at him, your face showing a look of confusion mixed with… dare he say it, was that a hint of blush on your cheeks? He let out a small chuckle as he noticed your small, almost pouty frown. "What's with that look for, doll? You got a problem with the new nickname?"

You pursed your lips, as if mulling over the nickname in your head and dissecting it. He had no reason to call you that, but you knew JJ even though he didn't know you. You knew he was carefree and casual with everyone, so it wasn't hard for him to say certain things or make jokes. A part of you had always been envious of that, ever since you started liking him. Maybe that's why you liked him. He was the opposite of you, and in some ways you wished you could be like him, or like the girls you knew he usually went for.

He observed your facial expressions closely as you seemed to be deep in thought. He could practically hear the gears turning in your head as you thought about the nickname he had given you. He didn’t know why he called you "doll", it just came out naturally in the moment. He had a habit of nicknaming people, especially pretty ones, without even thinking about it. But for some reason, he was more interested in your reaction to it this time. It was the first nickname he had given you, and he wondered how you would react to it.

He chuckled softly to himself as he watched you purse your lips slightly, your facial expression almost looking like you were analyzing and dissecting the nickname he had given you. He couldn’t help but feel amused at the way you were acting. You were so quiet and soft-spoken, so different from anything he was used to. It was almost endearing in a way. He found your shyness refreshing and cute.

You decided you had enough of just standing there awkwardly and you looked up at him, nodding in greeting and walking towards the steps off the porch, your feet moving slowly, as if you were hesitating, afraid not to create a hole through the wood or something. You didn't wanna leave obviously, but you were awkward and weird and flustered easily and he was... well, JJ. You decided that you liked pining after him from afar from your camera lenses and behind corners rather than embarrassing yourself by talking to him face to face.

JJ watched as you nodded in greeting and began to walk down the steps of the porch. He let out a small chuckle as he noticed the slow and hesitant way you moved, as if you were afraid to break something on the way. He found your nervous mannerisms to be endearing, and he couldn’t help but wonder what was going on in your head at that moment.

As you started walking away, he couldn’t help but step forward and speak up before you got too far.

"Hey, wait."

He took a few steps towards you, closing the distance between the two of you again as he spoke up, his voice low and gentle. "You’re just gonna leave like that, doll?"

"Well.. yeah?" you grimaced hesitantly, curious as to why he seemed so adamant on speaking with you even though you were silent most of the time.

He raised an eyebrow at your hesitancy and grimace. He couldn’t help but feel a mix of annoyance and interest at the fact that you were just going to leave without a second thought. He had wanted to talk to you more, and he wasn’t about to give up just yet.

"You can’t just leave after you’ve barely said anything at this party. You’re too quiet, it’s a little weird."

Ouch again. He probably didn't mean to make another stingy comment, but you still felt the sting a little. You didn't let it show though, raising your brows and adjusting your glasses, looking at him as if expecting him to continue, despite the obvious figurative period at the end of his sentence.

He noticed the subtle flash of hurt in your eyes at his comment, but he didn’t apologize for it. He had a reputation to maintain after all. He raised an eyebrow in return at your raised brows and expression, expecting you to say something. When you didn’t, his eyes narrowed slightly as if he was annoyed that you weren’t responding. "Is that all you’re gonna do, just stare at me?"

You looked to the side as if considering his question, nodding slowly and silently. You knew he probably didn't like it, you weren't the kind of person that would hang around JJ Maybank after all. But you couldn't help it, your brain just didn't wanna speak sometimes, it was like it was selectively mute, which was very asshole-ish of it.

He let out a low sigh at your nod and silent response. He found it both annoying and endearing at the same time how reticent you were. He wasn’t used to someone being this quiet and reserved around him. Usually girls would cling to him or talk endlessly, never shutting up.

He took a small step closer to you, his eyes narrowed slightly as he looked down at you. He leaned forward slightly, his voice low and gruff as he spoke. "You can at least say something, doll."

"Something." you spoke without realizing, the word soft and quiet even though it was more sarcastic than anything.

A surprised laugh escaped his lips at your unexpected sarcastic response. He didn’t expect you to actually say something, let alone something sarcastic.

"Clever."

He said dryly as a smirk formed on his face, his eyebrows raising slightly. He was enjoying this more than he cared to admit, he wasn’t used to people being sarcastic back to him, not someone as quiet as you anyway.

He leaned in slightly closer, his smirk slowly morphing into a small, amused smile. He liked how blunt and sarcastic you could be, and the fact that you were being sarcastic with him was almost funny. "You sure know how to make conversation, doll."

You raised your brows and nodded looking to the side once again as if to say 'i know right?', a small scoff leaving your lips.

He chuckled softly at your raised brows and subtle scoff. It was like you were trying to match his confidence and snarky attitude but by being quiet at the same time, and he couldn’t help but find it amusing. He took another small step forward, getting even closer to you. "You sure are a sassy one, doll. Most people would be a stuttering mess in front of me right now."

'I am stuttering... mentally.' you thought, fixing him with your gaze. You were sure you were plenty nervous in front him anyway, stuttering would just make you explode probably. You were sure that would actually happen if it came down to it.

He could see the hint of nervousness in your eyes as you fixed him with a steady gaze. He knew that you were probably feeling very nervous and intimidated by his presence, but you were doing a good job at not letting it show. It was refreshing to him that you weren’t falling all over yourself in front of him like most girls did.

"You’re awfully quiet though. How come you’re not all over me like most girls are?" He asked, his voice laced with sarcasm and subtle curiosity.

'Oh, how i would love to-..' you stopped that thought before it actually finished in your mind, shaking it out of your brain quickly. Your version of being all over him was stalking him around and taking pretty artsy and stalkerish pictures of him from afar. Of course that was embarrassing to think about, especially when he was standing right in front of you, talking and giving you casual nicknames like 'doll and mouse.'

He noticed the brief second when you seemed to zone out for a moment before snapping yourself out of it. He couldn’t help but be intrigued by the look that had crossed your face, if only for a split second. He raised an eyebrow at your sudden change in demeanor and wondered what had just gone through your head.

"You sure love zoning out, doll. You alright in that head of yours?"

You nodded swiftly, looking back up at him. Still, you couldn't seem to get a word out, which was becoming annoying for you. You can talk to him, he's not gonna bite.

He could sense your frustration at your inability to speak, even though he could also tell that you were trying to remain calm and collected in front of him. He found your struggle both endearing and irritating at the same time.

He chuckled softly before speaking again, his voice soft and casual. "You know you can talk to me, right? Like, actually say something out loud."

"I'm a girl of few words." you spoke up, pursing your lips gently as you looked up at him, nodding in a self-assured way.

He chuckled again at your response, his eyes fixed on your pursed lips. There was something strangely intriguing about the way you looked at him, even with your glasses in the way. "I can tell, doll. You’re practically mute." like an actual doll, that was even more funnier to think about in JJ's mind.

He found himself moving closer to you again, a smirk playing on his lips. He was enjoying the fact that you were struggling to speak, and secretly found it cute how shy and awkward you were around him.

"You’re a little mouse, aren’t ya? Too shy to talk?"

You hated that word when it was used to describe your quietness by others, but when it came out of his mouth and it rolled off his lips you found it almost... sweet. The way he seemed to weigh his words and keep his rowdy and loud behavior in check made you feel.. special? but also pitied, like he was scared of scaring you away. You raised your brows, adjusting your glasses and smiling slightly at him, nodding again after a few seconds.

He could see the hint of annoyance in your eyes when he called you a mouse, but it was gone as soon as he saw you smile slightly.

"Awww, look at that, she finally smiled. I didn’t think it was possible with you being so quiet."

He mocked your silence once more, just to tease you a bit more. He found your reactions and facial expressions entertaining, even if you were silent most of the time.

Somehow you found the courage to reach up and smack his shoulder playfully, glaring at him half heartedly. The action surprised even yourself, retracting your hand fast in fear that you might've made him uncomfortable.

His eyes widened slightly in surprise when you reached up and smacked his shoulder, the action catching him off guard. It was the first time you had physically touched him, and he couldn’t help but feel a small spark of electricity at the contact. He also noticed the way you retracted your hand quickly, as if you were afraid of what he might do.

He laughed softly at the look on your face, his smirk widening.

"Did you just SMACK me, mouse?"

"Sorry.." you stuttered out, stepping back a little nervously. It was supposed to be a casual teasing smack but as per usual, you made things awkward and weird. Just like you always did.

He chuckled again at your stuttered apology, the sound low and gruff. He found your nervous mannerisms and stuttering quite endearing. It was an odd thing, being intrigued by someone who hardly talked and was very awkward. He took a step closer to you, closing the distance between you again. "Don’t apologize, doll. I’m not mad." He said lowly, his smirk fading into a soft smile.

You nodded quickly, turning away suddenly and walking towards Maisy's car to retrieve your board and skate home. God, you had spoken to him more than you ever did in these 8 years of pining after him. And it was so nerve wrecking, having someone have some much control over you without even knowing.

As you walked away, JJ couldn't help but feel a bit of disappointment that you were leaving already. He watched you walk towards Maisy's car, and a part of him wanted to call out to you to stay, but he didn't.

He couldn't quite understand why, but there was something about you that he found strangely captivating. Despite the fact that you were very shy and awkward around him, he felt strangely drawn to you. He didn’t want the conversation to end just yet.

He thought about calling out to you to wait, but something stopped him. He wasn't sure what it was, but he couldn't bring himself to speak up. Instead, he just watched as you walked away, his eyes fixed on your retreating form.

Maybe it was the way you had looked at him with those shy, behind-the-glasses eyes, or the soft, almost sarcastic responses you had given him despite your quiet nature. Something just made him want to keep talking to you, even if all you did was just nod and stay silent most of the time. Maybe that's what JJ needed, someone quiet enough to help him ground his loudness. But that thought was shaken away when he realized you were a stranger and the 2 of you might not even interact ever again.

JJ was still standing there at base of the porch steps, watching as you opened the back seat of Maisy's car. He raised an eyebrow at the state of the car, thinking to himself about how messy it was. As you retrieved your board from under the pile of clothes and Gatorade bottles, he watched your every movement intently.

When you suddenly turned around and waved at him, JJ couldn’t help but feel a fluttering in his chest. He couldn’t quite understand why, but he found the gesture strangely adorable.

He raised his hand in response, waving back at you.

"Night, mouse. Don't get lost on the way home."

He called out, his smirk returning to his face. He couldn't help but tease you a little before you left, it was too hard not to poke at your shy demeanor.

You couldn't help but smile at his use of the nickname again, placing your board on the sidewalk and glancing at him one last time before finally forcing yourself to skate away down the sidewalk, the sound of the party becoming distant as you skated down the street.

JJ watched as you placed your board on the sidewalk and started skating away. He couldn’t help but notice the small smile that had appeared on your face when he had called you 'mouse' again. He felt a small twinge of satisfaction being the cause of the smile, even if it was a small one.

—♡‧

A/n: Okay so... what do we think about the first interaction? I decided mid-way that I'm making this multiple parts..☆*: .｡. o(≧▽≦)o .｡.:*☆ if this does well I'll post part 2.. JJ is such a yapper, and the reader is.. not. I'll take this down if people don't read it but i have an entire story about these 2 :( I'm just curious if this was too long

Divider credits: @cafekitsune

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[skyrigel]

me: feels unloved *searches x reader tag*

[r4di0h3ad]

just practice

paring! bsf!jj x reader

in which! you have a date coming up and you still haven’t lost your virginity, so you go to your best friend in the hopes he will help you out and save you from embarrassment

warnings! smut. loss of virginity. oral sex (f. receiving) pnv sex. unprotected sex.

part 2

you find jj at the chateau, laying in a hammock on the porch with his shirt off and a joint between his fingers. you could smell the scent of weed before you even made it to the door and jj gave you a smile when he noticed you.

“hey, j.” you greeted, now standing in front of the bench. “you busy?”

“what’s it look like?” he took a long drag from the joint and exhaled. you couldn’t help but grin at his glazed over eyes and his genuine, high smile.

you glanced into the screen door, looking for john b, or anyone else, but couldn’t see well from the smoky haze.

“anyone home?”

he shakes his head no.

“kie and pope are working, think john b’s out with sarah.” he says. “why? you okay?” his eyes soften and you notice his look of concern.

“yeah,” you smile, “everything’s fine, just need to uh- talk to you.” you had no idea how you were gonna go through with this without making it incredibly awkward. you already felt sick to your stomach at the thought of him rejecting you and never seeing you the same way after this.

jj nods and stubs out his joint. he stands up and opens the screen door, motioning for you to enter first.

“after you.”

you smile and step inside, but you soon begin to feel ill at the fact that you were really going to ask him this. you wanted this to happen, but you were terribly nervous.

you lead him to his room and close the door behind you. he sits on the edge of the bed and you follow, sitting crisss cross, facing him.

“you sure everything’s fine?” he asks, obviously questioning the fact that you wanted to speak to him in his room, and that you were silent.

“i told you about that guy i’ve been talking to for a few weeks, yeah?” you start, not wanting to make eye contact with the boy.

“yeah.” he nods.

you try not to pick at the skin of your fingernails.

“okay, well, he asked me out.” you say. “the date’s tomorrow.”

he furrows his eyebrows in question, noticing that you sounded kind of disappointed about something that was supposed to be good.

“well that’s a good thing, right?” he scoffed. “i mean, i cant remember the last time you went on a date.”

“shut up.” you nudge him. “yeah, it’s a good thing… i like him- i think.”

“alright, well, that’s all you wanted to tell me?” he asks. “you don’t need dating advice right? because i can’t help you in that department.”

you fight a smile at his remark and shake your head no.

“okay, here’s the thing.” you sigh before you force out your next words, absolutely dreading his reaction. “i don’t know if he’ll wanna sleep with me eventually, and, well he’s kind of experienced with girls and all that, and i’m kind of…. not.” you cringe at your choice of words, already regretting coming to jj out of embarrassment. you glance at him momentarily and he seems to be studying you, waiting for you to keep talking. “what i mean is, like-“ you sighed. you knew you sounded like a complete idiot, but you didn’t want to back out now.

“you know i’m a virgin, right?” you didn’t even want to look at him after the words came out of your mouth.

he smiled a little.

“i, uh, i figured.” he scratched the back of his head awkwardly and cleared his throat.

“don’t be a dick.” you shove him once again and he chuckles, which allows you to lighten up just slightly. “i’m saying that i don’t know what i’m doing - y’know, with guys and all that. i don’t want to embarrass myself in front of him.”

“so you want… sex advice? from me?” he asks, raising his eyebrows with suspicion.

you nervously bite the inside of your cheek and your face grows hot.

“well, i thought maybe a little more hands on.” you said before you could even stop yourself. you knew you had to just come out and say it or you would’ve backed out and nothing would ever come of this situation. you searched his face for a reaction.

he looked confused, but he didn’t seem whole heartedly against the idea. the silence between you both was becoming awkward and you felt the need to explain yourself, hopefully making the situation sound less like you were coming on to him and more like a friend just asking for help.

“i mean like, because you’re a guy and all, you would know what guys like best, i guess?” you said, as you watched him cross his arms over his chest and lean against the headboard of the bed. “and i was thinking about the fact that i’m going on a date for the first time since freshman year and now there’s a very high chance that i’ll sleep with him in the coming weeks, and it just- i don’t know, the idea of losing my virginity to someone i’ve known for a month didn’t really sound good to me.” you we’re rambling at this point to try and defend your case. “i would rather do it with someone i know, and trust.”

“you want me to take your virginity?” he asked, blatantly. “that’s what you came here for?”

you nod, probably chewing a hole into your cheek now.

“if it’s too weird for you, you don’t have to do it at all, it’s okay.” you said. “you were just the only person i felt like i could ask without it being awkward.”

“no, no,” his expression softens and he shakes his head, pulling his arms from his chest and taking his back off the headboard. “i’ll do it.”

“really?” your eyes light up because you expected this to go far south.

“yeah, no big deal.” he shrugs, even though in his head he knew it was a huge deal. he was going to be your first time and if he screwed it up, there was no telling what would happen between you two. “but, this won’t change anything between us right?” he asked. “like i just don’t want it to be awkward afterwards.”

“i swear.” you said, although you didn’t entirely know if that was the truth. “you’re just helping me out, right?”

“alright.” he responds. “you, uh, you wanna do this now or..?” he clears his throat again, visibly getting nervous, but your fears seemed to be disappearing now that you knew he wasn’t against the idea.

“the sooner, the better.” you said.

jj gets up from the bed and flips the lock on the door on the off chance someone were to come home.

“just a warning though,” you start, “i’ll definitely be really bad at this compared to the other girls you’ve been with.”

“that’s all right, you gotta learn somewhere.” he says, walking back to you and stopping right in front of where you were sitting on the bed. your heart started to race as the reality of what you were about to do started setting in. he sits down next to you and you could smell salt water and weed on his skin. “i’m gonna start with kissing you, is that okay?” you searches your face for confirmation and you nod, giving him the okay. “and you’ll tell me if i’m taking things too fast or if you wanna stop, right?”

you giggle a little at his attention to the matter.

“yes jj.”

you see a very slight smile appear on his lips before he slowly leaned in and connected them with yours. he tasted like weed but in the most perfect way as he skillfully moved his lips in sync with yours. his tongue softly swiped your bottom lip at the same time his hands found their way to the sides of your face and he held you there gently. you took him touching you as a sign to occupy your own hands with his body as you brought your hands around his back, feeling his bare skin.

his kisses started leading down your chin, and further down onto your neck where he connected his lips with your skin. you shivered at the new feeling of someone kissing your neck as he went lower still, reaching your collarbone. he pulled away and tugged at the him of your shirt, asking for more access to your body and he helped you out of the fabric.

“you doin okay?” he asks.

“totally fine.”

he connects his lips to your collar again as he carefully lays you down onto your back. he fights the urge not to leave any hickeys on you, knowing you had a date tomorrow.

you scoot your body up until you’re in the middle of the bed so that he can easily get on top of you. he continues kissing your body, getting lower and lower and with each passing second, you could feel yourself getting hotter and your arousal getting stronger. his mouth reached the waistband of your jean shorts and he looked up your for permission to take them off. you nodded and he unbuttoned them before sliding them down your legs and tossing them somewhere on the floor.

jj kissed the curve of your hipbone and you mindlessly rolled your core up towards his mouth, to which you could feel him smirk against your skin at your neediness.

“i’ll get there princess.” he said against the space under your bellybutton. you practically lost your breath at his words and your cheeks flushed out of embarrassment.

he continued kissing you even lower, placing his lips over clothed core and hooking a finger underneath the hem of your bikini bottoms.

“can i take these off?” he asked.

“please.” you nod, almost sounding too desperate.

he pulls your bottoms down your legs, leaving you exposed to him. the first time anyone had seen you like this, and you were thankful it was jj and not some random boy who didn’t know the first thing about you.

“you still alright?”

“jj,” you giggle. “i’ll tell you if somethings wrong, okay?”

“just being courteous.” he joked.

he brought his hand to your now bare core and used his thumb to swipe a line from your entrance up to your clit, making you whine from just one touch. he spreads your wetness around your clit, his pants growing tighter at the sight of your arousal. as he rubs painfully slow circles, he searches your face for signs of enjoyment, but your eyes were shut tight and your lips were parted, quiet whimpers leaving your mouth.

“just relax, okay?” he said, to which you nod eagerly. you were totally not relaxed at all. in fact you were amped on adrenaline from the way he kissed you.

and then before you could register what was happening, you felt something new touching you. you opened your eyes and looked down at jj’s face in between your thighs, seeing his tongue swirling over your clit. it felt better than any time you had ever touched yourself. his eyes met yours for a second and you wondered why you never asked him to do this any sooner even though you pictured him going down on you many times before

your hands found their way to his blonde locks, your fingers tangling into his hair as you threw your head back on the pillow.

“oh my god, jj” you moaned, to which he picked up the pace a little. he gripped your thighs firmly, holding them apart, occasionally rubbing circles into your skin with his thumbs to relax you.

his lips wrapped around your clit and he sucked, making you jolt your hips up in pleasure at the new sensation. your legs were trembling under his grip and jj didn’t think he could get any harder, but he was, in fact, getting harder by the minute.

“jj,” you moaned his name, “please don’t stop!” you were pulling his hair tighter, trying not to be too loud in case anyone were to come home, but it was impossible to keep your mouth shut with the way he was eating your pussy. “feels so good” you cried.

your hips were rocking back and forth, rolling in the same rhythm as his tongue, practically riding his face. he knew you were close based on the fact that your moans were getting closer together and your legs were shaking harder. he suddenly switched the direction of his tongue, now going side to side and occasionally sucking on your clit, swallowing your juices.

your back was arched off the bed, your hands flying to the sheets for something to hold on to as your high approached in small waves. you moved one hand to cover your mouth, trying to stifle your moans, but jj immediately reached up to your arm and pulled it from your face, not stopping his movements.

“need to hear you cum” he said against your clit before harshly sucking on it.

“fuck” you moaned, his words alone almost leading you over the edge.

he snuck two fingers into your entrance and slowly moved them against the sweet spot inside you. the mixture of his mouth expertly lapping at your clit and his fingers pushing into you had you coming undone.

“fuck- don’t stop- please- don’t st-“ you couldn’t even get the last words out as you felt yourself completely lose control. you didn’t know how loud you were moaning because all of your senses had faltered as the tidal wave of ecstasy crashed over you.

he kept licking until you had fully ridden out your orgasm, and even then, he continued, his grip still tight on your legs as they trembled. you pushed his head away from the overstimulation and then lay limp, your chest rising and falling as you came down, your eyes still closed.

“need a second?” he asked, mockingly, his hands running up your torso and to your still covered breasts. he felt your nipples harden under your bikini top and he desperately wanted to get you out of it.

you wrap your arms around his back and pull him on top of you, connecting your lips with his again. he immediately kisses you back and reaches behind you to undo your top, which quickly comes off and jj’s eyes land on your breasts. he takes them both in his hands and leans over you to suck your nipple, making you shiver.

you occupy your own hands with his belt, fumbling with the clasp until it’s undone and pulling it through the loops.

he pulls himself away from your tits and starts undoing the zipper before his eyes meet yours.

“you sure you’re okay with this?” he asks.

“i wouldn’t be fully naked in front of you right now if i wasn’t.” you joke.

he gets up from the bed to take his shorts off and look around the room, presumably for a condom.

“john b’s gotta have some around here, hold on.” he says, opening up the top drawer of the dresser and rummaging through the pairs of socks and underwear.

“you don’t have to, jay.” you say, but he doesn’t listen, still looking inside the dresser for any small, silver packages. “i’m on birth control.”

he turns around cocks his head at you.

“what?” you question. “makes my periods lighter.” you shrug.

“i’m still pulling out though.” he says before he walks back to the edge of the bed and slides his boxers off, revealing his achingly hard cock. you visibly got nervous at his length, swallowing the saliva in your mouth. jj notices the redness in your face and gets into the bed, pushing hair out of your face with his fingers. “i’ll stop if it’s too much, just tell me.” you nod, anxiously and he positions himself on top of you, stroking his cock a few times before you feel his tip at your entrance. his eyes meet yours for confirmation and you give him a nod.

his cock slowly pushes into you, not even an inch as he doesn’t want to hurt you. you shut your eyes hard, preparing for it to hurt, but you feel barely any pain. he kisses your neck and pushes himself in a little farther.

“this feel okay?” he asks against your skin.

“feels good, j.” your hands find their way to his back again.

once he bottoms out, you feel a slight pressure at your cervix before he slowly starts moving, giving you time to adjust to the feeling.

you hear jj moan in your ear from the painfully slow strokes he was taking, trying to keep himself from going too fast for you. his cock rubbed against your g-spot and you kiss the area in between his collar and neck.

“i’m okay jj.” you reassure him. “faster, please.”

he picks up the pace and continues kissing your neck. your nails dig into the skin of his back.

“you feel so good” he moans. “doin’ so good for me- fuck.” he didn’t even realize what he was saying, but you enjoyed the hell out of it. his praises added to the pleasure of him inside you.

he was going fast enough now that you could hear your skin hitting against each others as your hips connected. every thrust was stroking your sweet spot and you were pretty sure you were leaving scratches on his back, but jj felt too good to even notice.

he leaned back a little so that all his weight was on his knees and his back was straight as he grabbed one of your legs for support and used his other hand to rub your clit at the same time he was fucking you. the double stimulation illicited a loud moan from you that encouraged jj to keep going, almost nearing his end.

his thrusts were getting sloppier and his breathing was heavier but he wanted to make you finish before him. your chest heaved, feeling the new sensation of him filling you up at the same time as his fingers worked on your clit. the pressure was building up and you knew you were close. you suddenly pulled him against you so that your chests were pressed against each others.

“fuck- jj” you moaned. “m’so close.”

his heavy breathing sounded like heaven to you as he started to fuck you even harder, his cock sliding perfectly in and out of you.

“sweetheart” he moaned into your neck. “m’not gonna last much longer.”

almost immediately after he said those words, you felt the band in your stomach snap as you came around his cock, squeezing and pulling him deeper inside you. you cried out his name as he fucked you through your second orgasm.

“fuck, baby-“ he pulled out of you and stroked his cock that was slick with your wetness. you watched his face contort in pleasure, his eyes barely open and his lips parted, his eyebrows furrowed. his cum shot onto your stomach and tits.

he tried not to stare too long at the mess he made of you, realizing almost as soon as he finished that this was a one time thing he may never get you like this again.

he got out of the bed and grabbed a shirt of the floor, which he cleaned you up with and tossed it.

“you okay?” he asked again.

you rolled your eyes.

“how many times are you gonna ask that?” you scoffed. “i liked it, j. don’t know how my date’s gonna top that.” you joked.

then, jj remembered that this was all practice for you to go and have sex with another guy and he suddenly felt sick. he pulled his boxers back on and picked up your articles of clothing from the floor and tossed them to you.

the truth is, you didn’t even want to go on that date anymore. not after the way jj took care of you.

“hey, jj!” a voice, john b’s, ripped through the chateau and both of your eyes widened, looking at each other with panic. “you home?”

you swiftly put your bottoms and shorts back on in under 30 seconds and shrugged yourself into your flimsy shirt while jj was putting his belt back on. you quickly exited john b’s room before he could see where you both came from and you nervously greeted him in the living room to see that sarah and kie were home as well.

“heyy, jb.” jj said, awkwardly.

“what have you two been doing all day?” john b asks.

kiara walked over to the kitchen to grab a beer and when she turned around, she noticed the marks on jj’s back. she paused in her steps.

“jj, what’s with all the scratches on your ba-“ and then she realized. her face contorted in disgust. “ewwww, are you guys fucking serious?”

your face grows hot with embarrassment and you wanted to dig a whole to die in, but john b seems barely faced as he walked past you, saying something near you.

“at least you made that boy’s dreams come true.”



[robinsgrl]

Rafe with weird girl is a bit more nonchalant and tame compared to JJ with weird girl. he WILL match your freak and that’s a threat and yeah you might be weird but he’s much weirder he makes you shy. YOU.

weird girl masterlist

MDNI 18+

you’re talkative. You’re never not talking someone’s ear off. Most people can’t handle it. Sometimes your own friends need a moment of silence. But never JJ.

you’re laid back on your bed, legs spread open as his face hides between you. “deb deserves so much better. her boyfriend is such an asshole.” you breathe out shakily as he laps at your cunt.

he hums into you, nodding. “she does, mama. much better.” he dives right back in, your fingers threading through his hair.

“yeah, and the weird thing is she doesn’t think she does,” a small moan leaves your lips but you continue. “we tell her all the time. oh! I forgot the worst part! when they were on a break, he came to the store and-and bought condoms. at her register.”

this makes him pull his face from your heat, eyes wide as he looks down at you. “no fucking way.”

You nod, just as exasperated. “yeah, i know, it was fucking crazy” you tell him as you push his head back down

you’ve gone fishing with him and you’re so damn bored. you came to tan but the suns slowly going down and you're sure you’re as tan as you can be. he adds bait one last time and throws it far into the water. your eyes trail on his strong arms that are flexing under the soft hue of the sunset.

you dont even question your thought. you lean over and chomp down onto his bicep. he’s not even phased. “what’s my sunscreen taste like?” he asks as he glances over at you with a pretty smile. it makes your cheeks flush.

“delicious. wanna try mine?” it’s a joke. but you should know better than to joke like that with him. he doesn’t hesitate to drop his rod and rush to you.

a loud laugh leaves you as he tackles you in a hug, making you land on him as he falls to his back on the boat. he’s nipping at your neck, biting and sucking on you. “jj!” you can’t stop the happy laughs that leave you.

“you taste so good, mama!” he trails his lips down to your chest and bites the side of your boob that’s pressing out of your bikini. it doesn’t take long for him to fully take your tit out and bite your pebbled nipple.

“JJ!”

you’re in bed with jj when you realize something. he’s butt naked. “bro, where are your pants?”

“bro, i like letting my balls get air”

“bro, are you clenching your cheeks right now?” You ask with a laugh as you smack his ass. He lets out a fake moan and pushes his ass to you.

“Bro, i loved that. Do it again.” He’s laying on top of you now, feeling his everything against you. Your hands fall to his butt and you easily squish his cheek. “Bro, im getting a boner.”

“Your bro is giving you a boner? Bro, that’s fruity.”

He nuzzles his face into your neck as you keep smacking his naked butt. “Your little butt is so cute” you comment.

“My butt is NOT small”

“Yes, it’s a tiny lil bubble butt”

“There’s nothing tiny about me, mama” you laugh as he rolls his hips into you.

“JJ! Oh my god!” You laugh and try and push him off of you.

Yeah, no one can ever truly grasp JJ’s freak— he leaves you miles behind. Moral of the story…… he wins.

[almadelsur]

💋 The Secrets One Keeps

summary: You're in love with jj but he's with kie, so in moments of pure desperation you often find yourself turning to the person he hates the most...rafe

warnings: some good old angsty pining, very very slight smut if you squint, fem!reader, one or two uses of y/n, plz let me know if I missed anything

a/n: SHE'S BACKKKK, so I've decided to completely reformat and re-post this fic with a few tweaks and editing considering i first wrote this like 3 years ago, and yes for those of you who have been asking, I fully intend to finallly continue this fic....more info on that later ;)

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・

JJ’s eyes change the moment Kiara steps into any room. Immediately his presence is ripped away from your immediate atmosphere, popping the little bubble you'd spent all afternoon crafting as he sprung up to greet the olive-skinned enigma that captured his affections.

“Kie!” The joy in his tone was incomparable to anything he’d directed at anybody else. Nothing could draw out such happiness from the blonde. You hated that about her.

In an attempt at self-defense, your brain shut itself off. Shielding you from processing the scene in front of you, your emotions ran cold like cement pouring down and across your neurons. It was the only way you could survive such a beating to your heart.

You figured that by distancing yourself mentally, you wouldn’t have to raise suspicion and distance yourself physically. In reality, you knew the real reasoning was your inability to stay away from JJ but the facade helped you cope.

“Hey J” she embraced him and his body relaxed around her as if she was the only source of his happiness. The only way he’d find alleviation from what he perceived as a shitty life being through her. “Sorry I’m late my parents had me running like crazy at the wreck today.”

Scattered greetings filled the air from the rest of the pogues, yet you could only focus on the way his eyes fixated on her like she was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen.

“Here come sit baby” he offered her the seat he had just previously been place holding. What you thought had been quality time with your best friend, presented itself to you now as momentary attention to pass the time until his actual desire arrived.

Settling herself down and offering you a wide smile, her shoulder bumped against yours gently as a sign of acknowledgment.

“Hey dude” she directed at you, but you didn’t reply. You just couldn’t bring yourself to pretend. Not today anyway. Instead, you offered her a small smile, it was minimal but it was the best you could do under the circumstances.

“Yo" A crumpled tissue paper flew at your head, jj attempting to refocus your attention on him, "didn’t you say you were gonna get some water or something?” He spoke up, the scheme evident in his tone.

“um yeah I guess” You lifted yourself up and took a few steps before jj used the opportunity to slump himself down where you had been sat and sprawled his arms across his girlfriend’s shoulders.

“snooze ya loose sucker” he joked as he turned to Kiara to start up some mindless conversation. Leaving you behind in the dust.

Your teeth gritted as you focused on making your way to the kitchen hoping the distance from the scene unfolding would lift the iron grip on your heart.

You made the fatal mistake of glancing back and you were met with the image of jj nuzzling up to kiara in a picturesque display of love. The lump building at the base of your throat indicated that it was your time to get the hell out of there before you broke down in front of everyone. 

“Shit guys, y’know what I just realized I gotta go” You spoke quickly, your tone matching your pace as you rushed to the exit of the chateau. 

“You’re still coming to the party later though right?” John B asked, not tearing his eyes away from the screen in front of him. 

“Mhm yeah sure” you opened the door ready to depart. 

“Shit I forgot about that! Me and jj are gonna be late, we got dinner at the wreck tonight.” kiara added as you stepped out, unable to control the escape of a rogue tear.

“Date night babyyyy” You heard JJ cheer before you slammed the door behind you. 

“Is Y/N okay? She seemed a bit off.” Kie nudged JJ as she questioned. 

JJ furrowed his eyebrows momentarily. Glancing out the window, he saw you jog away from the house, and a brief flash of worry flashed through his mind. As quick as it came, it dissipated. He shook his head figuring that if there had been something wrong, he’d have been the first to know. 

“Nah she’s okay don't worry.” he offered to kie.

Boy was he mistaken. 

——————————————————————

“Fuuuck me” you moaned out, sinking into him one last time. You were hot, sweaty, and heaving as you pulled him out of you.

“I thought I just did” Rafe taunted leaning back to lie down, arms crossed behind his head causing his taut abdomen to flex.

You scrambled off the bed, picking up your garments and shoving them back on your body forcefully.

“What, no pillow talk?” He tried again.

“Rafe..” you trailed off. Whenever you’d finish fucking, you’d struggle to even look at him. The self-hatred flooded your body as soon as the orgasm poured out.

“Hey you called me” he eyed you intently but you knew he didn’t actually care. To rafe cameron everything was just a game. At this point it was pretty much common knowledge. “In fact” he moved closer to you so that he could speak directly into your ear “It’s always you that calls me.”

“Don’t be a dick” you stood up and eyed your heels contemplating whether you could face the walk back in them. “You know it makes me feel like shit.” It might have sounded brutal but that’s how things were with rafe.

“Yeah, it’s like you punctuate your orgasms with self-hate.”

“I'm a pogue, rafe.” You argued back as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“So? Kooks and pogues can fuck you know.” You couldn’t comprehend why you were even having this conversation. Why now, why tonight.

“Yeah maybe, not you though.” You didn’t want to tell him the reason explicitly.

“I fuck pogues.”

“You fuck anyone.” The words came out almost instantly and without thinking, yet rafe took no offense.

“Exactly so what’s the issue?”

“The issue is, rafe.” You paused trying to find the words without actually having to say the words. “The issue is that if my friends found out they’d hate me, probably more than I already hate myself.”

He just chuckled, the look in his eyes changing as he figured you out.

“What's funny?” You challenged.

“You don’t have to bullshit me princess.” He looked up at you with a devilish glint in his eye. “You just don’t want jj knowing about your little escapades huh?” Bingo.

“He’s with Kiara.” You shrugged him off.

“Uh huh, you like him but you can’t have him.” Every word he spoke striking a nerve deep within you. “So you’re fucking me to fuck him over.”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.” You grabbed your heels and shoved them on, wincing as you buckled them up.

“Don’t I?” He threw his joggers on lazily as he stood, the level dynamics changing significantly. The older boy towered over you. “Where are they tonight?”

“Back at John B’s, we had a little get-together.” You crossed your arms. More often than not you usually called rafe after a few drinks left you feeling lonely. “Sorry, your invite must have gotten lost in the mail.” You attempted to jab at him with sarcasm yet he clearly held the upper hand with his line of questioning. 

“So all of them are there now?” He stepped towards you.

“Mhm,” You lied.

“Even jj?” Moving closer until your neck was craned upwards to meet his eyes.

Taking your silence as an answer, he reached up and ran his palms across your upper arms, prompting you to uncross them.

“He was uh- him and kie should be getting there soon” You mumbled.

“So would i be wrong in guessing, that might have prompted your call then?” You let yourself be guided by his movements leaning your neck further back as his hand trailed up to your jawbone.

“rafe…” you called out insignificantly.

He leaned in and pressed his lips against your neck, right over where he could feel your pulse, and pressed down.

You couldn’t help the gasp that left your mouth. Because as much as your heart belonged to jj, rafe was just so fucking good at raising your temperature.

“Round two?” He mumbled against your neck.

“Yeah..” you attempted yet it came out as a whisper. He grabbed you swiftly and lifted you, moving you across the room and throwing you down onto his bed, crawling on top of you in a predatory manner as he did so. As your back hit the bed, the ringing of your phone brought you back from the haze he had you under. 

“Wait rafe stop stop” you pushed him off and grabbed the screeching mobile, pressing it up to your ear. “Hello?”

“Dude, where are you?” The sound of jj’s voice came through over the pumping sound of music and party chatter. “Me and Kie just got back and John B says no one’s seen you for like over an hour.”

“Oh I’m uh, I had to go do something for my mom” The lie pouring out of your mouth caused rafe to chuckle which was of course met by a slap from you signaling for him to be quiet.

“Oh well, when are you getting back? I have to tell you about this date. You’re gonna be so proud of me I actually think I’m ready to tell Kie I love her” you screwed your eyes shut as he spoke.

“Yeah I- you know what I can’t make it back my mom needs me to stay and help out but uh I’ll see you tomorrow or something.” You hung up before he could even reply, throwing your phone down uncaring of its state.

“What’s wrong? They getting hitched?” Rafe spoke up from behind you.

You turned to Rafe, the fire in your veins pushing your arms to grab him, roughly pulling him back onto you.

“Just shut up and fuck me rafe.”

And fuck you he did.

——————————————————————

The next morning you woke up to the sight of rafe’s bare back. Not much of a cuddler, you figured.

Quietly you pushed the covers off and began to dress yourself back up. As you got to your shoes you sighed and shook your head, as if there was any way in hell you were going to walk home in heels. You scooped up your shoes and your now-cracked phone shaking your head, slightly ashamed at your outburst.

Without even a second glance at the sleeping body you were leaving behind, you made your way over to the door. As you turned the knob and stepped out to leave, a husky voice spoke up.

“I’ll keep my ringer on for you babe.”

You rolled your eyes looking back at him, “Fuck you rafe.”

“Yeah, that’s what I’m counting on.” He didn’t even open his eyes as he answered, instead just rustling around in the bed and turning to the other side, once again facing his back to you.

You scoffed as you exited. Your internal rant clouded your vision, body on autopilot with an excellent self-navigation of the Cameron house from the countless times you’d made this exit.

“Y/N?” The gentle voice wiped your thoughts clean as the shock stilled you dead in your tracks, slowly turning to come face to face with none other than Sarah.

“Sarah” you drawled out. “What are you doing here?”

“It’s my house?” Her head was cocked to the side, equally shocked to see you.

“No I just mean- I thought you were spending the night at John B’s.” You forced the small talk, avoiding the topic of why you were here, sneaking out at 8 in the morning.

“He had to work today, did you spend the night here?” She glanced up at the door of rafe’s bedroom.

“Umm-“ There had only been two other instances where you had been at a complete loss for words. The day jj told you he and Kiara were dating, the morning after your first sexual encounter with rafe, and now this.

“Are you sleeping with my brother?!” She whisper-shouted, eyes wide as the realization hit her. Busted.

“No?”

“Oh my god!” She grabbed you by the wrist and dragged you to her room, slamming the door as soon as you were both inside. “How long has this been going on?!” Her tone was loud and her hands wild as she interrogated you.

“Just a little under a year.” You sat on her bed and looked at your lap as you spoke. Reminiscent of a child being scolded.

“A year?! Oh my god!” She repeated. “Who knows about this?!”

With that, you looked up at her desperately. “No one. No one knows so please don’t tell them.” You didn’t have to name names for her to know who you were referring to.

“Are you two like” she paused “together?” She scrunched her nose up, disgusted at the thought of her bully of an older brother dating anyone.

“No god no. It’s just sex” you were just as uncomfortable as Sarah was, having to tell her about boning her older brother.

“Disgusting.” She turned away from you with her arms crossed, looking out the window.

“Look I’m not proud of it okay? Just-“ You sighed “Just please don’t tell anyone” pleading again.

Sarah let out a long sigh and uncrossed her arms. She walked over to you and joined you on the bed, her eyes showing concern mixed with something you couldn’t quite place your finger on.

“I thought you were into jj” she spoke softly, there it was. Pity.

“Yeah well, jj is with kie and instead of sitting around wallowing in self-pity, I decided to do something about it.” As the words left your mouth, you realized how weak the explanation was.

“So you just use rafe to bang the jj out of you.”

“It’s not like Rafe cares, if anything he’s also using me.” You tried to reason.

“I don’t doubt that. But I mean, that’s- It’s not healthy, you’ll never move on if you don’t actually process your emotio-“

“Look Sarah, I don’t need to do any of that shit okay? What I have here works, when I fu- when I’m with rafe, I don’t think about jj.” Tears began to swell in your eyes “Sleeping with rafe helps me forget about everything, even if it’s only for a little while he uh- he makes me feel good.” To an extent, there was truth behind your words, while you and rafe fucked the rest of the world went away. It was only after, that the crippling self-hatred hit you along with the return of your immense feelings for jj. 

Sarah shuffled over and threw her arm around you. “That’s not good for you, it’s just momentary. It’s easy and it's a cycle, you’re never going to get better going down this path. Especially not with rafe.”

“Rafe he’s- he’s not that bad.”

“Yes he is. But i bet it gives you satisfaction fucking him knowing jj hates him. Feels like revenge right?” She’d always been so perceptive your Sarah, you hated how she could see right through you.

Tears ran down your cheek silently. “You’re not gonna tell anyone right?” You sniffled.

She gave you one of those classic salt-of-the-earth Sarah Cameron smiles, the kinda smile that would light up any room she walked into. “Takin' it to the grave babe.”

A loud beeping caused both your heads to whip towards the window. “Shit, I completely forgot I was supposed to go on the HMS with pope and jj, we were gonna chill there until John B and Kie finished work.” She rose to her feet and extended an arm towards you. “Wanna come? Or we could drop you home if you’re not up for it.”

With a sigh you took her hand and pulled yourself up, walking beside her as you mentally prepped yourself to face the blonde you desperately pined for.

“Well rise and shine campers.” jj yelled out of the window of the drivers seat.

“Y/N! Where you been dude? you totally bailed last night.” Pope was next to speak as you and Sarah filed into the Twinkie. As JJ began to drive you avoided any form of eye contact in his general direction.

“I had to go help my mom out, blackout at mine again.” You didn’t even look at pope either, instead focusing your attention on the blur of trees and houses pacing by the window as JJ sped down the winding roads.

“Isn’t that what you were wearing last night?” pope, observant as always, pointed out.

“Uh yeah, I didn’t really get any time to change cause…”

“I called her last night when I got home, I was so drunk I don’t think I was ready to stop the party.” Sarah covered for you.

“Yeah I wrapped up helping my mom out and then this one calls me talkin bout a sleepover or something so I didn’t exactly have much time to change.” 

Thankfully pope had lost interest as soon as he had asked the question, otherwise, your overcompensating ass would have been caught out straight away. You always had to add to the lie until you felt like you had sold it completely.

Keeping your eyes trained on the outside meant that jj’s frown directed at you through the windscreen mirror went completely undetected. He always knew whenever there was something up with you and right there and then he knew something definitely was.

“Hey, you okay?” He didn’t need to address you explicitly for you to know he was talking to you.

“Yeah just tired.” You shrugged him off in an attempt to distance yourself from him yet again.

He knew you were lying but he didn’t understand why, you never lied to each other. Apart from John B, the pair of you were closer to each other than with anybody else in the group. You’d been best friends since kindergarten, and since then you’d sworn 3 things to each other.

1- You’d always share your snacks.

2-You’d always be best friends even if you argued.

 3- You would never ever lie or keep secrets from each other.

Of course, as the both of you grew older the rules became more and more lax. The snack sharing was limited only to when you felt nice enough and sometimes you’d go for days without making up if you had argued particularly badly. Having kept two friendship-breaking secrets from him, the childhood rules seemed pretty insignificant by now.

“Mhm,” he responded, flickering his eyes between you and the road. “Are we taking you home to change first?”

“Yeah, I don’t know if I’ll join you guys afterward though.” You chewed down on your nail anxiously as the tension from being in the same space as jj paired with the guilt from having fucked rafe prior, suffocated you.

JJ made a face as he focused on the road, something was wrong with you and he’d be dammed if he wasn’t going to put his everything into finding out what that was.

[peavhyshy]

⋆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆ - BACK TO YOU

ᯓᡣ𐭩 paring ─ ୨୧ ─ jj maybank ⋆ ex!pogue!reader

ᯓᡣ𐭩 summary ─ ୨୧ ─ in which you return to the island after moving away and have to confront unresolved feelings and changes in the friend group.

ᯓᡣ𐭩 warnings ─ ୨୧ ─ explicit language, angst, hurt/comfort, smut, fluff, drama, mention of past self-harm, mention of past suicide attempt, mention of depression/mental health issues, alcohol abuse, unresolved emotional/romantic tension, trauma, mention of parental abuse/neglect, emotional cheating, jj is dating kiara, pretend luke didn’t leave, tw: surf competition, reconciliation, emotional vulnerability, unprotected vaginal sex, fingering, oral sex, dirty talk, praise, teasing, power play, and overstimulation (please dni if your sensitive to any of these topics your mental health should come first)

ᯓᡣ𐭩 wc ─ ୨୧ ─ 19,166

⋆˚✿˖° a/n ─ ୨୧ ─ this is long and very emotional/dramatic which is half of the reason it's been sitting in drafts forever. this was only written because I just love the song and wanted something based on it.

⋆.˚✮back to you✮˚.⋆

(༝༚༝༚ selena gomez)

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──. Outer Banks Masterlist ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── Navigation ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆

JJ stands awkwardly by the cooler, his fingers drumming against the metal surface as he watches you grab another case of beer. The setting sun casts long shadows across John B's backyard, painting everything in hues of orange and pink. The salty breeze carries the distant sound of waves crashing against the shore, mixing with the muffled laughter and music inside the house. He can't help but steal glances at you, memories of your past flooding his mind like an unwanted tide.

"So uh..." JJ clears his throat, adjusting his shark tooth necklace nervously. "How was... wherever the fuck you went?" He tries to maintain his usual carefree demeanor, but an edge to his voice betrays his discomfort. His blue eyes dart between you and the ground, unable to maintain steady eye contact. The weight of your unspoken history hangs heavy between you, thicker than the humid Carolina evening.

You stand awkwardly, your fingers nervously playing with the label of your beer bottle. You avoid JJ's gaze, focusing instead on the peeling paint of John B's deck railing. The tension between you two is suffocating, making the humid evening air feel even heavier. "Maine," you finally answer, your voice barely above a whisper. "We went to Maine."

JJ's jaw tightens at the mention of Maine, his fingers flexing around his beer bottle as he processes just how far away you’ve been. "Maine? Fuck, that's like... way up there with all those lobsters and shit," he says, trying to maintain his usual lighthearted tone but failing miserably. 

"You look..." He starts, then stops himself, shoving his free hand into the pocket of his board shorts. "I mean, it's good you're back and shit. The group missed you." He deliberately leaves out the fact that he missed you too, that your absence left a void that even Kiara couldn't quite fill. The tension between you is palpable, like the electricity in the air before a storm - something the Outer Banks knows all too well. He takes a long pull from his beer, using it as an excuse to break the uncomfortable silence that's settled between you.

You take a long sip from your bottle, using the moment to gather your thoughts. The sight of JJ - still as handsome as ever with his messy blonde hair and those blue eyes - makes your heartache in a way you thought you’d gotten over. The sound of Kiara's laughter from inside feels like a knife twisting in your gut. "I see you and Kie finally..." you trail off, unable to finish the sentence. Your skin glows in the porch light.

"Yeah, me and Kie..." he trails off, taking another long pull from his beer to avoid finishing the sentence. The truth is, things with Kiara are good - great even - but standing here with you brings back all the complicated feelings he'd tried to bury in the sand. 

"The group seems... good," you manage, trying to keep your voice steady. "Different, but good." You risk a glance at JJ, immediately regretting it when you catch his eyes. Those same eyes that used to look at you with such intensity, now belong to someone else. You shift your weight, your sundress rustling softly in the evening breeze. 

A loud crash from inside the house makes you both jump causing you to spill a bit of beer on your dress, followed by John B's distinctive "Everything's fine!" JJ lets out a forced laugh, but it doesn't reach his eyes. He's hyper-aware of every movement you make, every shift in your posture, every breath you take. The familiar scent of your perfume mixed with the salt air brings back memories he's tried so hard to suppress - stolen kisses behind the Wreck, late-night surfing sessions, promises made and broken. He adjusts his stance, trying to maintain a careful distance between you, even as every fiber of his being wants to close it.

"Shit," you mutter, dabbing at the spot with your free hand. You can feel JJ's presence just a few feet away, and it takes everything in you not to close that distance. "I should've called or something," you say suddenly, the words tumbling out before you can stop them. "Before I left, I mean. I just... I couldn't." Your voice cracks slightly on the last word, betraying the emotions you're trying so hard to keep in check.

The raw honesty in your voice, when you mention not calling, makes his throat tight. "Yeah, well..." JJ runs a hand through his hair again, his shark tooth necklace catching the light as he moves. "Probably wouldn't have answered anyway. Was pretty fucked up back then." He lets out a laugh, but there's pain behind it. "Still am, just better at hiding it now." The admission hangs between you like smoke, heavy and suffocating. He can hear Sarah and John B singing off-key inside, the sound a stark contrast to the tension-filled bubble you're standing in.

He watches as you dab at the beer stain on your dress, fighting the urge to help you like he would have before. "Fuck, hold up," he mutters, pulling off his worn t-shirt and offering it to you without thinking. The porch light illuminates the scattered bruises across his torso - some new, some old ones you’d recognize.

You stand there, your heart racing as you stare at JJ's shirtless form. You reach out hesitant to take his shirt, your fingers brushing briefly in a way that sends electricity through your entire body. "Thanks," you manage to say, your voice barely above a whisper. 

"You look good though," he finally says, the words escaping before he can stop them. His eyes meet yours for a moment before quickly looking away. "I mean, like, healthy and shit. That's... that's good." He shifts uncomfortably, very aware that he's still shirtless and that the space between you feels both too large and not large enough. The familiar scent of your perfume is making his head spin, or maybe it's the beer, or maybe it's just you - it's always been you. "Did it help?" he asks quietly, genuinely wanting to know. "Going away? Did it... fix things?" The question carries more weight than he intends, loaded with all the things he never got to say before you left.

The sound of Kiara's laughter drifts out again, and you flinches visibly. You take another long drink from your beer, needing the liquid courage. "It helped," you finally answer his question, unconsciously running your fingers over the faded scars on your wrists. "The doctors, the therapy, the distance... It helped. But it didn't fix everything." You look up at him then, really look at him, taking in how the years have changed him. He's still JJ - still beautiful but there's something harder in his eyes now, something that wasn't there before.

You clutch his shirt in your hands, the familiar scent of him - salt air, coconut surf wax, and something distinctly JJ - making you dizzy with memories. "I..." you start, then swallow hard. "I wanted to call. Every single day, I picked up my phone and stared at your number until the screen went black."

"I missed you," You confess quietly, immediately regretting the words as soon as they leave your mouth. "I mean, I missed everyone," you quickly add, but you both know it's not the same thing. You can feel the weight of everything unsaid between you, three years' worth of words you never got to say. "You look happy," you say, trying to smile even though it feels like your heart is breaking all over again. "With Kie, I mean. You guys... you make sense together." The lie tastes bitter on your tongue, but you force it out anyway. Because what else can you say? That seeing them together feels like drowning? That every time you close your eyes, you still see him? That Maine might have helped you heal your mind, but it did nothing to heal your heart? 

A burst of laughter from inside makes him jump, reminding him where you are and who's waiting for him. "Happy?" he scoffs, the word tasting like ash in his mouth. "Yeah, sure. I'm fucking peachy." His sarcasm is sharp enough to cut, a defense mechanism he's perfected over the years. He takes another long drink from his beer, finishing it in one go before setting it down with more force than necessary. "And don't do that shit about me and Kie making sense. You don't get to..." he stops himself again, running a hand over his face.

"Fuck, Y/N/N," JJ breathes out, using your old nickname without thinking. His fingers twitch at his sides, wanting to reach for you but knowing he can't. The sight of you touching your wrist scars makes his stomach turn - he remembers the day he found you, remembers the blood, remembers feeling more terrified than he'd ever been in his life.

"You can't just come back here and say shit like that," he says, his voice rough with emotion. He runs both hands through his hair in frustration, pacing a small circle on the deck. "You left, Y/N. You fucking left and I..." he trails off, the rest of the sentence dying in his throat. The memory of those first few weeks, after you disappeared, hits him like a physical blow - the drinking, the fights, the reckless behavior that even John B couldn't talk him down from.

"I didn't want to leave, JJ," You say, taking a step closer to him despite yourself. The electricity between you is almost tangible now. "You think I wanted to be shipped off to fucking Maine? To be locked up in some facility where they watched my every move? Where they made me talk about every fucking thing that was wrong with me?" Your voice rises slightly before you catch yourself, glancing nervously at the house. "I was drowning here, JJ. I was drowning and I couldn't..." 

"You know what? Fuck this," JJ says suddenly, his eyes blazing with a mix of anger and something else - something that looks dangerously close to the way he used to look at you. "You want to know what happened after you left? I fucking lost it, Y/N. I was so fucked up I couldn't even..." he cuts himself off, aware he's saying too much. The space between you feels charged with electricity, like the air before a storm. 

"But hey, at least the doctors fixed you up real nice, right?" The words are meant to sting, but there's a tremor in his voice that betrays him. He's still that same boy who used to sneak into your room at night, who used to hold you when the darkness got too heavy, who promised he'd always be there - until you made it impossible to keep that promise." His eyes intense as they lock onto yours. "I used to check your social media every fucking day. Every. Day. Just to make sure you were still..." he trails off, unable to finish the sentence. 

Your hands tremble as you clutch his shirt tighter, his familiar scent making your head spin. "Lost it?" You repeat, your voice cracking. "You think you were the only one who lost it?" The words come out sharper than intended, years of buried pain rising to the surface. Your skin flushes with anger and hurt, your eyes glistening with unshed tears. The bitterness in his voice when he mentions the doctors makes you flinch. "Fixed me up real nice?" You repeat, a hollow laugh escaping your lips. "Is that what you think? That I'm all better now? That I just went away and came back brand new?" You move closer still, close enough to see the flecks of darker blue in his eyes, close enough to smell the beer on his breath. "I still have nightmares. I still get days where I can barely get out of bed. The only difference is now I have better coping mechanisms than..." 

His confession about checking your social media makes your heart stutter in your chest. "I deactivated everything," you admit quietly, your voice thick with emotion. "Because every time I logged on, all I wanted to do was message you. Tell you I was sorry. Tell you I..." you stop yourself, very aware of how close you're standing now, of the fact that he's still shirtless, of Kiara just inside the house. "It doesn't matter now, does it?" You say, taking a step back, trying to create some distance between you even though every cell in your body screams to move closer. "You moved on. You're happy. That's... that's good." The lie tastes like poison on your tongue, but you force it out anyway, because what right do you have to come back here and disrupt his life? What right do you have to still want him this much?

JJ's body tenses as Pope's voice cuts through the charged atmosphere. "What’s taking so long with those beers? John B's about to start drinking mouthwash if we don't..." Pope trails off as he steps onto the deck, his eyes darting between JJ's shirtless form and you holding the said shirt. "Oh shit, my bad, I didn't..." he starts, but JJ cuts him off with a sharp laugh that sounds more like a bark.

"Nothing to be sorry for, Pope," JJ says, his voice carrying an edge that makes Pope raise his eyebrows. JJ snatches up the case of beer from the cooler, his movements jerky and aggressive. "Just catching up with our prodigal pogue here. Sharing war stories about her fancy fucking therapy in Maine." The words come out dripping with sarcasm, but there's a tremor in his hands as he grips the beer case. The porch light catches the tension in his jaw, the way his muscles are coiled tight like he's ready to either fight or flee.

"JJ," Pope says warningly, recognizing the signs of his friend spiraling. He's seen this before - usually right before JJ does something spectacularly stupid. "Maybe we should all just-" But JJ's already moving, shouldering past both of them towards the house. He pauses at the door, his back to you, his knuckles white around the beer case. "You know what the fucked up part is?" he says, not turning around. "I actually thought..." he stops, letting out a bitter laugh. "Doesn't matter what I thought. Welcome home, Y/N. Hope Maine was worth it."

Pope watches JJ disappear inside before turning to you with an apologetic look. "He was really messed up when you left," he says quietly, always the mediator. "Like, more than usual messed up. Started getting into fights with Topper almost daily, drinking more than his dad. Kiara was the only one who could calm him down sometimes." He runs a hand over his face, looking tired. "Look, I know it's not my place, but... maybe give him some time? He's better now, but seeing you again..." Pope glances at the door where you can hear JJ's forced laughter mixing with the others. "It's like reopening an old wound, you know?"

You stare at the door JJ just disappeared through, your heart feeling like it's being ripped apart all over again. His shirt is still clutched in your trembling hands, and you bring it unconsciously closer to your chest. You can feel tears threatening to spill over. "Time?" You repeat Pope's words with a hollow laugh. "Yeah, because three years wasn't enough time, right?" Your voice cracks on the last word, and you have to take a deep breath to steady yourself.

"In Maine, they made us write letters. Letters to everyone we hurt, everyone who hurt us. I wrote so many letters to JJ that they had to give me extra paper." You let out a shaky breath, running your fingers over the soft fabric of JJ's shirt. "Never sent a single one. How do you put three years of 'I'm sorry' and 'I miss you' and 'I still...' into words that don't sound completely fucking pathetic?"

The sound of breaking glass comes from inside, followed by Kiara's concerned "JJ?" Pope closes his eyes and sighs. "And there it is. I better..." he gestures towards the house. "You coming?" The question hangs in the air, heavy with the weight of everything that's just transpired.

The sound of Kiara's concerned voice calling for JJ makes your stomach twist painfully. "You should go check on him," you say to Pope, finally looking up. Your eyes are swimming with unshed tears, but you refuse to let them fall. "I'll... I'll be in in a minute. Just need to..." You gesture vaguely at yourself, trying to pull together the pieces of your composure that JJ's words had shattered. "And Pope?" You call as he turns to leave. "I know everyone probably hates me for leaving. Hell, I hate myself for it. But I didn't have a choice. It was either leave or..." 

You can hear more commotion from inside - JJ's voice raised, something else breaking, Kiara trying to calm him down. The sound makes your chest ache in a way that feels physical. "Fuck," you whisper to yourself, looking down at JJ's shirt still in your hands. You bring it to your face, inhaling his scent one last time before forcing yourself to fold it neatly. You’ll have to give it back eventually, but right now, you need a moment to remember how to breathe without feeling like you’re drowning all over again. The irony isn't lost on you - you left the Outer Banks to stop feeling like you were drowning, only to come back and find yourself deeper underwater than ever before.

The tension in living room is thick enough to cut with a knife as you enter. JJ is sprawled on the couch next to Kiara, his arm draped possessively around her shoulders while nursing what appears to be his fifth beer. There's broken glass by the kitchen counter that Sarah's carefully sweeping up, shooting concerned glances at everyone.

"So this competition tomorrow," John B says too loudly, clearly trying to diffuse the tension. "Heard Topper's entering too." He's sitting cross-legged on the floor, picking at the label of his beer bottle. "Gonna be some sick waves though, bro. Weather report's saying six-footers at least."

JJ snorts, his blue eyes deliberately avoiding your direction. "Yeah, well, Topper can suck my-" Kiara elbows him in the ribs, cutting him off. "What? I'm just saying the trust fund baby probably can't even tell the difference between the nose and tail of his board." His words are slightly slurred, with anger and alcohol making his voice thicker.

"Actually," Sarah pipes up from the kitchen, dumping the broken glass in the trash, "I heard he's been practicing a lot." She settles onto the arm of John B's chair, her blonde hair catching the dim light. "Something about wanting to prove himself or whatever."

Pope shifts slightly as you sit next to him, creating a protective barrier between you and JJ. "You still surf, Y/N?" he asks, trying to include you in the conversation. "Remember that time you totally schooled JJ on that left break by the pier?"

"Fuck off, Pope," JJ snaps, his grip tightening on his beer bottle. "That was one time, and I was hungover as shit." Kiara places a calming hand on his thigh, but he shrugs it off, standing up abruptly. "I need another beer."

"Maybe you should slow down," Kiara suggests gently, reaching for his hand. "The competition's early tomorrow and-"

"I said I need another fucking beer," JJ cuts her off, his voice sharp. He stalks toward the kitchen, purposely taking the long way around to avoid passing near you. "And for the record," he adds, pausing in the doorway, "that left break? I let her win. Figured she needed the ego boost since she was so fucking fragile back then." The words are meant to wound, and from the way you tense beside him, Pope can tell they hit their mark.

John B stands up, running a hand through his hair. "JJ, bro, come on-"

"What?" JJ whirls around, his eyes blazing. "We all just gonna pretend like everything's normal? Like she didn't just fuck off for three years and come waltzing back expecting everything to be the same?" He lets out a bitter laugh. "Nah, I'm good. You guys can play happy fucking family without me."

The room falls into a heavy silence after JJ's outburst. Sarah is the first to speak, her voice gentle but firm. "JJ, that's enough." She moves from her perch on John B's chair, positioning herself between JJ and the rest of the group.

Your hands are shaking as you stand up, your voice quiet but steady. "You want to do this now? Fine." You take a step forward, ignoring Pope's attempt to grab your arm. "You think you're the only one who was hurt? You think you're the only one who was fucked up?" Your voice rises slightly, years of pent-up emotion breaking through. "I didn't just 'fuck off' to Maine for fun, JJ. I went because the alternative was being lowered into the ground in a fucking coffin!"

Kiara stands up too, torn between her boyfriend and her old friend. "Y/N, maybe we should-"

"No, Kie," you cut her off, your eyes locked on JJ. "He wants to talk about being fragile? About letting me win? At least I'm trying to get better. What are you doing, JJ? Getting drunk and picking fights? Real fucking healthy."

John B moves to intervene, but Pope holds him back, shaking his head. This has been brewing since the moment you walked through the door.

"You know what the difference is between us?" You continue, your voice cracking. "I admit I'm broken. I went and got help because I was tired of hurting everyone around me. But you?" You let out a hollow laugh. "You're still that same scared little boy, hiding behind your anger and your booze because god forbid anyone see that you're hurting too. You’re acting just like your daddy.” 

The moment the words leave your mouth, the room erupts into chaos. JJ's beer bottle shatters in his hand as he lunges forward. "Don't you fucking DARE!" as John B and Pope rush to grab him. His muscles strain against their hold. "You don't get to say that shit! You don't get to fucking compare me to him!"

"JJ, stop!" Kiara shouts, but he's beyond hearing. His blue eyes are wild, unfocused, filled with a pain so deep it makes everyone in the room flinch. "You want to talk about being broken?" JJ spits, still fighting against John B and Pope's restraining arms. "At least I didn't run away! At least I stayed and faced my shit instead of leaving everyone wondering if you were even fucking alive!" His voice cracks on the last word, raw emotion bleeding through the anger. "Do you know how many times I drove by your house? How many nights I sat outside your window hoping you'd just... fuck!" 

 "Where the fuck was all this concern for mental health when I was showing up at your window covered in bruises? When I was sleeping on the beach because I was too scared to go home?" Blood continues to drip from his hand, creating a small puddle on the floor.

"You know what's really fucking funny?" JJ continues, his voice cracking. "The day you left? I was gonna tell you everything. About my dad, about how fucked up I was, about how you were the only person who made me feel like maybe I wasn't completely worthless." His words are like bullets, each one aimed to hit where it hurts most.

"Bro, calm down," John B grunts, struggling to maintain his grip. "This isn't helping-"

"Helping?" JJ lets out a laugh that sounds more like a sob. "Nothing helps! Nothing fucking helps because she LEFT!" He finally breaks free, stumbling forward but not advancing towards you. Instead, he stands there, chest heaving, looking more vulnerable than any of them has ever seen him. "You left," he repeats, quieter now, his voice thick with unshed tears. "You left and I couldn't... I couldn't fucking breathe. And now you're back and I still can't breathe and I..." He runs his hands through his hair violently, turning away from everyone.

Pope steps forward cautiously. "JJ, maybe we should-"

"Don't," JJ cuts him off, his voice dangerous again. "Just... don't." He grabs his keys from the counter, ignoring Kiara's protests. "I need to get the fuck out of here before I..." He doesn't finish the sentence, just storms out, the screen door slamming behind him. The sound of his motorcycle roaring to life fills the night air moments later.

The room falls into a heavy silence after JJ's dramatic exit. You stand frozen, your whole body trembling as tears finally spill down your cheeks. Sarah is the first to move, wrapping her arms around you as you begin to sob.

"I didn't mean..." you choke out between sobs. "I didn't mean to say that about his dad. I just... I was so angry and..." You collapse onto the couch, Sarah still holding you while Kiara paces anxiously by the door.

"Someone needs to go after him," Kiara says, grabbing her jacket. "He's drunk and upset, he shouldn't be on that bike." She looks torn between staying with you and chasing after her boyfriend.

John B runs a hand through his hair, exchanging worried looks with Pope. "I'll go," he says, grabbing his keys. "Pope, you stay here with them. Sarah, can you...?" He gestures at you, who's still crying into Sarah's shoulder.

"I got her," Sarah assures him. "Just... bring him back in one piece, okay?"

Pope starts cleaning up the broken glass, his movements careful and methodical. "You know," he says quietly, "JJ never told anyone this, but he used to sleep in your treehouse after you left. We'd find him up there some mornings, usually after really bad nights with his dad."

"He kept your bracelet too," Kiara adds softly, still hovering by the door. "The one you made him at that bonfire. Wears it under his watch sometimes." She pauses, conflict clear on her face. "I should go with John B-"

"No," you say, wiping your eyes. "Stay. Please. I... I need to tell you all something. About why I really left." You take a shaky breath, looking around at your friends - the family you left behind. "It wasn't just the self-harm or the suicide attempt. There was... there was more. And JJ... he deserves to know the truth. You all do."

Sarah squeezes your hand encouragingly while Pope settles on the floor in front of you. The sound of the Twinkie starting up outside fills the momentary silence.

"Take your time," Sarah says gently. "We're listening." 

John B finds JJ at their usual spot - the abandoned dock near the marsh where they used to fish as kids. JJ's sitting at the edge, legs dangling over the water, a fresh beer in his hand that he definitely grabbed from his emergency stash hidden in the old boat nearby. His motorcycle is parked haphazardly in the grass, still ticking as it cools down.

"Figured I'd find you here," John B says, settling down next to his best friend. The moonlight reflects off the water, casting everything in a silvery glow. "That was quite a show back there, bro."

JJ takes a long pull from his beer, his knuckles still bloody from the broken bottle. "Fuck off, John B," he mutters, but there's no real heat behind it. His hands are shaking slightly as he brings the bottle back to his lips. "I don't need another fucking lecture about controlling my temper or whatever shit you're about to say."

"Actually," John B says, pulling out two fresh beers from his pocket and handing one to JJ, "I was gonna say she had no right bringing up your dad." He cracks open his beer, the sound echoing across the quiet marsh. "That was fucked up."

JJ lets out a hollow laugh, running his uninjured hand through his messy hair. "You know what's fucked up? She's right." His voice cracks slightly. "I am turning into him. Getting drunk, breaking shit, can't control my fucking temper..." He throws his empty bottle into the water with force, watching it disappear beneath the dark surface.

"Nah, man," John B shakes his head firmly. "You're nothing like Luke. You know how I know?" He waits until JJ looks at him. "Because you care. Like, actually give a shit about people. Luke never did." He pauses, choosing his next words carefully. "And you loved her. Still do, probably."

"Doesn't fucking matter now, does it?" JJ's voice is rough with emotion. "I'm with Kie. And Y/N... she's..." he trails off, unable to finish the sentence. The crickets chirp in the silence that follows, the marsh grass swaying in the gentle breeze.

"You know," John B says after a while, "Kie knows. Has known for a while, I think. About how you feel about Y/N." He takes another sip of his beer. "Maybe that's why she's been so... I don't know, different lately?"

JJ's head snaps up, his blue eyes wide in the moonlight. "What the fuck are you talking about?"

"Come on, bro," John B sighs. "You've been wearing that bracelet under your watch since the day Y/N left. You sleep in her old treehouse when shit gets bad. And the way you looked at her tonight... that wasn't just anger, man."

JJ stares out at the dark water, his jaw working as he processes John B's words. "It's not..." he starts, then stops, taking a long drink. "Fuck, man." The moonlight catches the silver threads in his shark tooth necklace as he shifts uncomfortably. "You can't just say shit like that about me and Kie."

"Why not?" John B presses, watching his best friend carefully. "Because it's true? Because you've been trying so hard to convince yourself that what you have with Kie is enough?" He dodges the empty beer can JJ throws at his head with practiced ease. "I love Kie, man. We all do. But she deserves better than being someone's second choice."

"You think I don't know that?" JJ explodes, jumping to his feet. He paces the dock, his shoes making the old wood creak. "You think I don't fucking hate myself for it? For not being able to..." he trails off, running both hands through his hair in frustration. "Y/N left, John B. She fucking left without a word and Kie... Kie was there. She picked up the pieces. She..."

"She's not Y/N," John B finishes quietly. The words hang in the humid night air, heavy with truth. "And that's not fair to any of you."

JJ stops pacing, bracing himself against one of the dock posts. His knuckles are white where they grip the wood, blood from his earlier injury leaving dark smears. "You should've seen her that night," he says so quietly John B almost misses it. "The night before she left. She came to my window like she always did when shit got bad. But something was different. She wouldn't look at me, wouldn't let me touch her. Just kept saying she was sorry." His voice cracks. "I should've known. Should've fucking done something."

"JJ..." John B starts, but JJ cuts him off.

"And now she's back," he continues, his voice rough. "She's back and she's wearing that fucking perfume that makes my head spin, and she's got these new scars I don't know the stories too, and she's looking at me like... like..." He slams his fist into the post, adding fresh splinters to his already injured hand. "Like I'm still that stupid kid who couldn't save her. How I didn't see how bad it was getting. How I was so caught up in my shit with my dad that I missed all the signs." He runs his hands through his hair roughly. "And you know what the worst part is? Even after everything, even with Kie... I still..." He can't finish the sentence, but he doesn't need to.

The marsh is quiet except for the gentle lapping of water against the dock and the distant sound of a boat horn. John B watches as his best friend falls apart, knowing there's nothing he can say to make this better. "Maybe," he finally suggests, "you should talk to Kie. Like, really talk to her. And then..." he hesitates. "Maybe you should talk to Y/N too. About everything."

JJ lets out a bitter laugh. "Yeah? And say what? 'Sorry, I just had a fucking meltdown in front of everyone because seeing you still makes me feel like I'm drowning'? 'Sorry, I'm such a fuck up I couldn't even move on properly'?" He slides down to sit on the dock again, his energy seemingly drained. "Nah, man. Some things are better left buried."

The two make their way to the van it rumbles down the dark road, headlights cutting through the night as John B glances worriedly at JJ in the passenger seat. JJ is slumped against the window, his breath fogging up the glass, the streetlights casting intermittent shadows across his face. His bloody knuckles rest in his lap, the makeshift bandage John B made from his t-shirt already soaking through.

"Your dad's been better lately, right?" John B asks cautiously, turning onto JJ's street. "Like, with the new job and everything?" He knows these periods of calm with Luke are temporary, like the eye of a hurricane - peaceful until it's not.

JJ lets out a laugh, his eyes still fixed on the passing shadows outside. "Yeah, for now. Give it a week, maybe two if we're lucky." His voice is tired, drained of its usual energy. "He's actually buying groceries instead of beer. Fucking miracle, right?" The sarcasm in his voice is thick enough to cut.

As they pull up to JJ's house, they can see Luke's truck in the driveway, the porch light on - a rare sight. Through the window, they can see him moving around in the kitchen, looking almost normal, almost like a real father. "You sure you don't want to crash at my place?" John B offers, killing the engine. "Sarah won't mind, and you know Pope's probably got Y/N calmed down by now..."

"Don't," JJ warns, his voice sharp. "Just... don't say her name right now, okay?" He runs his uninjured hand through his hair, a nervous habit that's become more frequent since your return. "I can't... I can't think about that shit right now. About what she said, about Kie, about..." he trails off, shaking his head.

The front door opens, and Luke steps onto the porch. "JJ? That you, son?" His voice carries across the yard, lacking its usual angry slur. "Got some leftovers if you're hungry. Made that fish you like." The attempt at normalcy is almost more unsettling than his usual violence.

"Fuck," JJ mutters, unbuckling his seatbelt. "Look at him, playing father of the year." He grabs his backpack from the backseat, wincing as the movement jars his injured hand. "Thanks for the ride, bro. And for..." he gestures vaguely, encompassing everything that happened at the dock.

"JJ," John B calls as his friend opens the door. "Just... be careful, okay? And if shit goes south..." He doesn't need to finish the sentence. They both know JJ's always got a place at the Chateau.

"Yeah, yeah," JJ forces a grin that doesn't reach his eyes. "Save the emotional shit for Sarah, man." He slams the van door, shouldering his backpack as he heads toward the house. Each step feels heavy like he's walking through water. The weight of everything - your return, his relationship with Kiara, his dad's temporary stability - sits on his shoulders like a physical burden.

Luke's waiting at the door, and for once, his eyes are clear. "Rough night?" he asks, noticing JJ's bandaged hand. There's genuine concern in his voice, the kind that makes JJ's chest ache because he knows it won't last.

He follows his father into the house, the familiar scent of fried fish and something else - hope, maybe? - filling the air. The kitchen is cleaner than he's seen it in years, dishes are actually washed and put away, no empty bottles littering the counters. It's like walking into a funhouse mirror version of his life, everything familiar but slightly wrong.

"Sit," Luke gestures to the table, already moving to reheat the food. "Got paid today. Foreman says I'm doing good work." There's pride in his voice, the kind JJ used to dream of hearing when he was younger. "Even got you something." He pulls out a small package from one of the kitchen drawers, sliding it across the table.

JJ stares at the package like it might bite him, his injured hand throbbing in rhythm with his heartbeat. "Dad, you didn't have to..." he starts, but Luke waves him off.

"Open it," Luke insists, putting a plate of steaming fish and rice in front of JJ. "Saw it at the store, thought of you." His voice is gruff with emotion he doesn't know how to express.

With trembling fingers, JJ unwraps the package. Inside is a new surf wax and a professional-grade fishing lure - the expensive kind they used to admire together in the shop window when JJ was little. "This is..." he swallows hard, something thick and painful lodging in his throat.

"For the competition tomorrow," Luke explains, sitting down across from him with his own plate. "Figured you could use some good gear." He pauses, studying JJ's face. "Your hand gonna be okay to surf?"

JJ flexes his fingers experimentally, wincing. "Yeah, it's fine. Just some scratches." He doesn't mention how he got them, and Luke doesn't ask. Some things are better left unsaid, even in this temporary peace.

They eat in relative silence, the only sounds are the scrape of forks against plates and the distant hum of crickets outside. JJ can't help but wait for the other shoe to drop, for his father to notice the alcohol on his breath, or ask why he came home so late. But Luke just keeps eating, occasionally glancing at JJ with something that looks almost like concern.

"Y/N’s back," Luke says suddenly, making JJ choke on his rice. "Saw her at the store today. She's grown up nice." He says it casually, like he doesn't know the weight those words carry like he doesn't remember the nights JJ came home drunk and broken after you left.

JJ's grip on his fork tightens, his knuckles white. "Dad..." he warns, but Luke continues.

"You know, I never told you this," Luke sets down his fork, his voice unusually serious. "But that girl... she used to come by sometimes when you were out. Would bring groceries, say she was just dropping off extras her mom bought." He lets out a dry laugh. "We both knew she was lying. She was checking on you, making sure I hadn't..." he trails off, shame coloring his voice.

The revelation hits JJ like a physical blow. He pushes back from the table, his chair scraping loudly against the floor. "I can't... I can't do this right now," he manages to say, his voice rough. "Thanks for dinner. And the..." he gestures at the gifts, unable to finish.

Luke nods, understanding in his eyes that hurts worse than any punch he's ever thrown. "Get some rest, son. Big day tomorrow." He watches as JJ practically flees to his room, the sound of his door closing echoing through the unusually quiet house.

In his room, JJ collapses onto his bed. The surf wax and lure sit on his nightstand, mocking him with their newness, their promise of a father he's always wanted but never quite had. He pulls out his phone, seeing missed calls from Kiara and texts from the group chat. But it's his wallpaper that catches his eye - still that old photo of him and you at the beach, your smile bright and real, his arm around your shoulders. He'd never changed it, not even after starting things with Kiara.

"Fuck," he whispers into the darkness, throwing his arm over his eyes. Tomorrow's competition suddenly seems like the least of his problems.

JJ is hunched over his surfboard on the front porch, a half-eaten piece of toast dangling from his mouth as he meticulously applies the new wax his father gave him. The morning sun casts long shadows across the worn wood of the porch, the air already thick with humidity. His injured hand throbs as he works, the makeshift bandage John B wrapped it in last night now stained and fraying.

The knock makes him jump, nearly dropping the wax block. "It's open!" he calls out, not looking up from his work. He knows it's Kiara before she even speaks - recognizes the pattern of her footsteps, the jingle of the shell anklet she always wears.

"Hey," Kiara's voice is soft and cautious. She's wearing her competition bikini under a loose tank top, her curly hair pulled back in a messy bun. "You weren't answering your phone." She settles down next to him on the porch steps, close but not touching - a careful distance that speaks volumes.

JJ continues working on his board, his movements perhaps more aggressive than necessary. "Yeah, well, been kind of busy." He gestures at the board with his injured hand, causing Kiara to suck in a sharp breath at the sight of his knuckles.

"Jesus, JJ," she reaches for his hand but he pulls away, standing up abruptly. "We need to talk about last night-"

"No," JJ cuts her off, running his good hand through his already messy hair. "We really don't. I fucked up, lost my temper, same old shit. Can we just..." he trails off, finally looking at her. The concern in her eyes makes his stomach twist with guilt.

Kiara stands too, crossing her arms. "Y/N told us everything last night," she says quietly. "After you left. About why she really went away." She watches as JJ's entire body tenses, his jaw clenching. "JJ, it wasn't just about the self-harm and the attempt. She was-"

"Stop," JJ's voice is sharp, dangerous. He turns away from her, gripping the porch railing so hard his knuckles turn white. "I don't want to know. I can't... I can't hear that shit right now. Not before the competition."

"You can't keep running from this," Kiara says, her voice stronger now. "And you can't keep pretending that what we have is..." she stops, taking a deep breath. "I see the way you look at her, JJ. I've always seen it. Even when you're angry at her, even when you're with me, you look at her like... like she's the sun and you're drowning in her light."

JJ lets out a bitter laugh, turning back to face her. "That's some poetic shit, Kie." But there's no humor in his voice, just pain and exhaustion. "What do you want me to say? That I'm sorry? That I'm a fucking mess who can't get his shit together? That I-"

"I want you to be honest," Kiara interrupts. "With me, with yourself, with her." She steps closer, reaching up to touch his face gently. "We both knew this wasn't forever, JJ. We were just... holding each other together until something better came along."

"You deserve better than that," JJ says quietly, leaning into her touch despite himself. "Better than me using you as a bandaid for my fucked up heart."

Kiara smiles sadly. "Yeah, I do. And so do you." She drops her hand, stepping back. "The competition starts soon. Y/N’s entering too, by the way. JJ? She still wears that shell necklace you made her. Never took it off, even in Maine."

The information hits JJ like a physical blow, making him grip the railing tighter. The surf wax sits abandoned on his board, the morning sun turning it soft and sticky. JJ sighs heavily, sliding down to sit on the porch steps. The morning sun continues to rise, casting long shadows across the yard where weeds push through cracked concrete - a perfect metaphor for their relationship, beautiful things growing in broken places.

"You're not mad?" JJ asks finally, his voice rough. He picks at the fraying bandage on his hand, avoiding her eyes. "About... everything?"

Kiara lets out a soft laugh sitting back down next to him bumping his shoulder with hers. "I mean, I probably should be. But honestly?" She tilts her face toward the sun, closing her eyes. "I think I've known since the beginning. We were both just... trying to fill empty spaces."

JJ runs his good hand through his hair, a nervous habit he can't shake. "You're too good for this shit, Kie. Too good for me and my fucked up baggage." He glances at her sideways. "I never meant to hurt you."

"I know," Kiara says simply. "And hey, at least we had some good times, right?" She grins at him, that familiar sparkle in her eyes. "Like that time we got caught skinny dipping at the country club pool?"

"Fuck," JJ laughs despite himself, the tension in his shoulders easing slightly. "Your dad's face when he found us... thought he was gonna have a stroke." The memory feels lighter now, less weighted with guilt.

They sit in comfortable silence for a moment. Finally, Kiara speaks again, her voice gentle but firm. "You need to talk to her, JJ. Like, really talk to her. No yelling, no running away."

JJ's jaw tightens. "Kie..."

"No, listen," she cuts him off. "What she told us last night... it changes things. And you deserve to know." She stands up, brushing off her shorts. "But first, you need to kick Topper's ass in this competition. Show him that pogues rule the waves, right?"

JJ looks up at her, gratitude and affection washing over him. "How are you so fucking cool about all this?"

Kiara shrugs, a small smile playing on her lips. "Because I love you both, you idiot. Just... not in the way we've been pretending." She starts walking backward toward her car. "See you at the beach. And JJ?" She pauses. "Whatever Y/N told us last night? It's not my story to tell. But when she does tell you... just remember she never stopped loving you either."

JJ watches her drive away, his heart feeling both lighter and heavier at the same time. He turns back to his surfboard, running his fingers over the fresh wax. The competition starts soon, and somewhere on that beach, you’ll be there. The thought makes his stomach flip in a way that has nothing to do with pre-competition nerves.

The beach is alive with pre-competition energy, the morning sun casting long shadows across the sand as spectators and competitors mill about. The group has claimed your usual spot, a patch of sand near the judges' stand where you're spread out with blankets and coolers. The air smells of salt spray and sunscreen, mixed with the distant scent of food vendors setting up their stalls.

JJ sits cross-legged next to Pope, obsessively checking the fins on his board while stealing glances at you. His injured hand is wrapped in fresh bandages - Pope's handiwork from earlier that morning. "You think the swell's gonna hold?" he asks Pope, his voice tighter than usual. "Weather report said it might pick up around noon."

"Dude, stop stressing," Pope replies, not looking up from his phone where he's tracking the wind patterns. "You could surf these waves in your sleep." He pauses, glancing at his friend. "Though maybe focus more on the waves and less on staring at Y/N every five seconds?"

A few feet away, Kiara and you sit huddled over your board, your heads close together as you work on the design. "Pass me the blue paint?" Kiara asks, her voice carefully casual. "I think it'll pop against the white."

"Here," You hand over the paint pen, your finger steady as you work on your own section of the board. "Thanks for helping me with this, Kie. I know it's... weird."

Sarah's voice carries over from where she's practically sitting in John B's lap, her laugh bright in the morning air. "John B, I swear to God, if you get any more sunscreen in my hair..." She squirms as he deliberately rubs more lotion on her neck.

"What? I'm being helpful!" John B protests, grinning. "Can't have my girl turning into a lobster." He catches JJ's eye and makes an exaggerated kissing face, earning himself a handful of sand thrown his way.

"Get a room, you two," Pope groans, but there's affection in his voice. "Some of us are trying to focus here."

"Yeah, focus on what?" JJ snaps, more harshly than intended. "The competition doesn't start for another hour." His eyes drift back to you, watching as you tuck a strand of hair behind your ear - a gesture so familiar it makes his chest ache.

"Speaking of the competition," Sarah pipes up, clearly trying to diffuse the tension, "heard Topper's been practicing his aerial moves. Might actually give you a run for your money this time, JJ."

"Please," JJ scoffs, his trademark cockiness returning. "Trust fund baby probably had to pay someone to teach him which end of the board goes in front." But his bravado falters when he catches you hiding a smile at his comment.

"The waves are looking good though," you offer quietly, your first direct contribution to the group conversation. "Nice clean sets coming in." Your voice carries over the beach noise, making JJ's hands still on his board.

The group falls into a loaded silence, everyone pretending not to notice the way JJ and you carefully avoid looking at each other, or how Kiara's shoulders relax slightly when JJ doesn't snap back with a sarcastic comment.

"Alright, enough of this weird energy," Pope announces, standing up and brushing sand off his shorts. "Who wants to help me get drinks from the vendor? We've got..." he checks his watch, "forty-five minutes to get JJ properly hydrated before he has to show these kooks how it's done."

"Let me help," Sarah jumps up, linking her arm through Pope's. "John B, Y/N, you coming?" There's a pointed look in her eyes that everyone pretends not to notice.

"I'm good," You reply, still focused on your board design. "Need to finish this before the competition starts." Your fingers trace the intricate pattern you and Kiara have created - waves and stars intertwining across the white surface.

"Me too," John B replies, stretching out on their blanket. "Someone's gotta make sure these two don't kill each other." He gestures vaguely between JJ and you, earning himself a glare from both of you.

Kiara looks up from the surfboard, her hands covered in paint. "Get me one of those açai bowls if they have them?" she calls after Pope and Sarah. "And maybe some water for everyone? It's getting hot out here."

As Pope and Sarah head toward the vendors, the remaining group falls into an awkward silence. JJ continues fidgeting with his board, though there's nothing left to adjust. The morning sun beats down on you, the humidity making everything feel sticky and tense. The beach is getting more crowded now, the excitement building as more competitors arrive with their boards.

"Your hand looks better," You say suddenly, your voice soft but carrying clearly over the beach noise. You're still focused on your board, not looking up, but your fingers have stilled on the paint pen.

JJ flexes his injured hand unconsciously. "Yeah, well, Pope's got practice wrapping shit up. Comes with being friends with a walking disaster." He tries for his usual sarcastic tone but it falls flat.

"Remember that time you tried to do a backflip off the pier?" John B interjects, clearly trying to ease the tension. "Pope had to use an entire first aid kit on your stupid ass."

"That was one time," JJ protests, a genuine smile finally cracking through his facade. "And I totally would've landed it if that jellyfish hadn't been in the way."

"There was no jellyfish," Kiara laughs, rolling her eyes. "You just chickened out halfway through."

"I did not!" JJ's voice rises indignantly. "Tell them, Y/N/N, you were there-" He cuts himself off abruptly, realizing he'd used your old nickname without thinking.

The silence that follows is deafening, broken only by the distant sound of waves and other competitors warming up. Your hand has started trembling slightly, though you try to hide it by gripping the paint pen tighter.

"There definitely wasn't a jellyfish," you finally say, your voice barely above a whisper. "But there was that group of tourist girls watching, and you were trying to show off..."

"Classic JJ," John B jumps in, trying to keep the conversation flowing. "Always trying to impress the ladies with his 'sick moves.'" He makes air quotes with his fingers.

The moment breaks when someone calls out "Maybank!" from down the beach. It's one of the competition organizers, clipboard in hand. "You're up in heat three, twenty minutes!"

"Shit," JJ mutters, standing up and grabbing his board. "I should probably warm up or whatever." He pauses, looking down at your board. "The design's good," he says quietly, before quickly adding, "Both of you. It's... yeah." He turns and jogs toward the water, his board under his arm.

"Well, that was almost a normal conversation," John B observes, earning himself an elbow in the ribs from Kiara. "What? I'm just saying..."

"I should warm up too," You say suddenly, standing and picking up your board. The morning sun catches the shell necklace around your neck - the one JJ made you years ago - making it gleam.

"Want company?" Kiara offers, but you shake your head.

"I need to..." you gesture vaguely toward the opposite end of the beach from where JJ went. "You know."

They watch as you walk away, your hair blowing in the ocean breeze. John B wraps an arm around Kiara's shoulders. "They'll figure it out," he says confidently. "They always do."

"Yeah," Kiara agrees, leaning into him. "But how many hearts are gonna get broken in the process?"

The question hangs in the air as they watch you two paddle out into the waves from opposite ends of the beach, like magnets simultaneously attracting and repelling each other. The waves crash against the shore as the competition gets underway, the beach packed with spectators cheering from the sand. The morning sun glints off the water, creating perfect conditions for the surfers waiting in the lineup. JJ sits on his board, straddling it as he watches the sets roll in, his injured hand gripping the rails slightly tighter than necessary. He's in heat three, along with you and Kiara, a cruel twist of fate that has his stomach in knots.

From the beach, John B's voice carries over the crowd. "Let's go, JJ! Show these kooks how it's done!" Sarah and Pope join in with their cheers, their enthusiasm infectious enough to draw smiles from other spectators.

JJ catches sight of you about twenty yards to his left, the shell necklace he made you glints in the sun. You're focused on the horizon, reading the waves with an intensity he remembers well from your late-night surfing sessions years ago. Kiara floats between you two, creating a triangle formation in the water, her presence both a buffer and a reminder of everything that's changed.

"First wave of heat three!" the announcer's voice booms over the speakers. "Riders, get ready!"

A set approaches and JJ feels the familiar surge of adrenaline. He watches as you turn your board, positioning yourself for the wave. Your form is different now - more refined, more confident. You catch the wave with practiced ease, your movement fluid as you drop in. The crowd cheers as you execute a perfect bottom turn, spraying water in an arc that catches the sunlight.

"Fuck," JJ mutters under his breath, both impressed and frustrated. He spots his own wave approaching, bigger than yours, and paddles hard. As he pops up, everything else fades away - the crowd, the competition, the complicated mess of emotions. It's just him and the wave, the way it's always been. He drives hard off the bottom, launching into an aerial that has the crowd screaming. His injured hand protests as he grabs his rail, but he sticks the landing, finishing with a powerful snap off the lip.

Kiara catches the next wave, her style more aggressive than yours but equally skilled. She shoots JJ a quick smile as she paddles back out, no trace of their earlier conversation in her expression. You're all competitors now, regardless of your personal drama.

The heat continues, each rider pushing themselves harder with each wave. JJ finds himself watching you more than he should, noticing how you’ve incorporated new techniques into your surfing. There's a grace to your movements that wasn't there before, a confidence that makes his chest tight with something between pride and regret.

From the beach, Pope's voice cuts through the crowd noise: "Time check! Two minutes left in the heat!"

JJ sits up straighter on his board, scanning for one last good wave. He needs something big to secure his spot in the finals. A set approaches, and he can see both you and Kiara eyeing it too. It's the kind of wave you used to fight over during your dawn patrol sessions - clean, powerful, perfect for showing off.

The tension in the water is palpable as you all turn toward shore, ready to battle for position. JJ glances at you, catching your eye for the first time since you paddled out. For a moment, it's like nothing has changed - you're just two kids from the Cut, living for the next wave. Then the moment breaks as the announcer's voice booms: "Final wave of heat three approaching! Who's gonna take it?"

The tension crackles through the air as all three surfers eye the approaching wave. JJ's muscles tense as he prepares to paddle, but suddenly you make your move first, cutting across his line with precise timing. You catch the wave perfectly, popping up with fluid grace that makes the crowd gasp.

"Holy shit!" John B's voice carries over the noise as you drop into the face of the wave. Your form is flawless, body low and controlled as you set up for your first maneuver. 

JJ can't help but watch, even as he and Kiara paddle back to position. You carve up the face of the wave, your movements more aggressive than before, spraying water in an arc that catches the sunlight. You transition into a series of snaps that have the judges leaning forward in their seats, before setting up for your finale.

"No fucking way," JJ mutters, recognizing the setup. It's a move you used to practice together, late at night when the beach was empty - a risky aerial that you’d perfected during those endless summer sessions. You launch off the lip, grabbing your rail and rotating in a way that seems to defy gravity. The landing is clean, and precise, sending another spray of water toward the sky as the crowd erupts.

"That's my girl!" Sarah screams from the beach, jumping up and down while clutching John B's arm. Pope's got his phone out, recording everything while shouting his own encouragement.

As you paddle back out, JJ catches your eye again. There's something different in your expression now - a mix of pride, challenge, and something else he can't quite read. Kiara paddles up beside him, a knowing look on her face.

"Damn," Kiara whistles low. "She's been practicing."

"Time!" The announcer's voice booms across the water. "Heat three is complete! Riders, return to shore for scoring."

The paddle back is quiet, each lost in your own thoughts as the judges figure out scores. JJ can feel the energy on the beach, knowing without looking that your last wave changed everything. As you hit the shallows, John B and Pope rush out to help with your boards.

"That was fucking insane!" John B exclaims, grabbing your board. "When did you learn to fly?"

You push your wet hair back, that shell necklace still somehow perfectly in place. "Maine has waves too," you say quietly, but your eyes flick to JJ as you say it. "Different, but good for practicing."

"Attention competitors," the announcer's voice cuts through their conversation. "Scores for heat three are ready..."

The group falls silent, tension building as you wait for the results. JJ finds himself holding his breath, his injured hand throbbing. The morning sun is high now, turning the ocean into a field of diamonds, and somewhere in the back of his mind, he remembers teaching you that aerial on a night just like this, under a full moon with no one else around.

The announcer's voice crackles over the speakers: "In third place, with a score of 8.7 - Kiara Carrera!"

Kiara grins, accepting high-fives from the group. "Not bad for a warmup," she says, squeezing water from her hair. Her eyes dart between JJ and you, anticipating what comes next.

"In second place, with a score of 9.2..." The pause feels endless, "JJ Maybank!"

JJ's jaw tightens, his fingers flexing around his board. He knows what's coming, and can feel it in the electric tension running through their little group. Pope claps him on the shoulder, but he barely feels it.

"And taking first place in heat three, with a score of 9.8 - Y/N L/N! That final aerial was something else, folks!"

The beach erupts in cheers, but JJ's focused on your face - the way your eyes widen in surprise, the slight tremor in your hands as Sarah pulls you into a crushing hug. You look exactly like you did years ago when you landed your first aerial under his guidance.

"Holy shit, Y/N!" John B whoops, lifting you off your feet in celebration. "That was fucking incredible!"

"All riders advancing to the finals, please check the board for heat assignments," the announcer continues. "Thirty-minute break before the next round."

JJ watches as they swarm you with congratulations, his emotions a tangled mess he can't sort through. Pride, jealousy, regret, and something deeper, something that feels like the undertow that used to drag you both out during night sessions.

"You taught her that aerial," Kiara says quietly beside him, her voice carrying a knowing tone. "I remember watching you two practice it for weeks."

Before JJ can respond, you break away from the group, approaching them with hesitant steps. You're holding something in your hand - his old surf wax, the one he'd always let you borrow during your sessions.

"Found this in my bag this morning," you say, your voice barely audible over the beach noise. "Thought you might want it back." Your finger brushes his as you hand it over, sending a jolt through his system that has nothing to do with the competition.

"Keep it," he finds himself saying, his voice rougher than intended. "Looks like you're putting it to better use anyway." He tries to make it sound casual, but there's too much history in those words, too many memories of dawn patrols and midnight sessions and promises made under starlit skies.

The moment stretches between you, heavy with unspoken words, until Pope's voice breaks through: "Guys! They're posting the final heat assignments!"

The group moves toward the bulletin board, but JJ hangs back, watching you walk away. The shell necklace catches the light again, and he remembers making it for you on this very beach, his fingers working the knots while you talked about constellations and dreams and futures that seemed possible then.

"You okay?" Kiara asks, lingering beside him.

"Yeah," JJ lies, running a hand through his salt-stiffened hair. "Just... fuck." He doesn't need to finish the sentence. Kiara understands - she always has.

The finals loom ahead, but all JJ can think about is that aerial, and how your form was exactly the same as when he first taught it to you, right down to the way you point your toes during the rotation. Some things, it seems, don't change - even when everything else does.

The beach is winding down as the sun begins its descent, painting the sky in brilliant oranges and pinks. The competition crowd has thinned, leaving behind only the most dedicated spectators and the Pogues, who are sprawled out on their blankets celebrating their friends' success. JJ, you, and Kiara stand together on the podium, your medals glinting in the late afternoon light.

"Third place, Kiara Carrera!" The announcer's voice booms one final time. Kiara grins, holding up her bronze medal as Sarah and John B whoop and holler from the crowd.

"Second place, Y/N L/N!" You step forward, accepting your silver medal with a small smile. The shell necklace around your neck catches the light, drawing JJ's attention momentarily.

"And your first-place winner, JJ Maybank!" The crowd erupts as JJ accepts his gold medal, his signature cocky grin in place despite the storm of emotions brewing beneath the surface. His final wave had been spectacular - a combination of raw power and technical skill that even the most critical judges couldn't deny.

As you step down from the podium, Pope approaches with a cooler. "Time to celebrate properly!" he announces, pulling out beers for everyone. The group gravitates toward your usual spot on the beach, away from the dispersing crowd.

"To the most talented pogues in the OBX!" John B raises his beer, his other arm wrapped around Sarah's waist. "And to Kiara for not killing JJ when he snake dropped her wave in the finals!"

"Hey!" JJ protests, but he's laughing. "All's fair in love and surfing, right?" The words hang in the air for a moment, loaded with meaning as his eyes unconsciously drift to you.

"That last aerial though," Pope interjects, sensing the tension. "Thought you were gonna break your neck, JJ."

"Please," JJ scoffs, taking a long drink from his beer. "That was nothing compared to the shit we used to pull during night sessions." He freezes slightly, realizing what he's said, and who he's referencing.

You shift beside him, your silver medal catching the dying light. "Remember that time we tried to surf during a lightning storm?" You say quietly, surprising everyone. "John B had to come to rescue us in the Twinkie."

"Jesus," Sarah laughs, but her eyes are watchful. "You two were always doing crazy shit like that."

The group falls into a comfortable rhythm of storytelling and laughter, the competition tension slowly easing. JJ finds himself hyper-aware of your presence, the way you laugh at John B's terrible jokes, and how you unconsciously play with that shell necklace when you're thinking.

"You've improved," he says suddenly when the others are distracted by Pope's dramatic reenactment of a wipeout. "Your form, I mean. It's... different. Better."

You look at him, really look at him, for what feels like the first time since you’ve been back. "Had a good teacher," you reply softly, your fingers still toying with the necklace. "Some things you don't forget, even when you're trying to."

The weight of unspoken words hangs between you, heavy as storm clouds. Kiara watches you two from across the circle, a knowing look in her eyes as she catches JJ's gaze.

The Wreck is bustling with the usual dinner crowd, but Kiara's parents have reserved the back section for their celebration. The smell of fried shrimp and hush puppies fills the air as you pile around your favorite table, medals still hanging around the winners' necks. The sunset streams through the windows, casting everything in a warm golden glow.

JJ slouches in his chair, one arm draped over the back as he nurses his beer. His eyes keep drifting to you, who's sitting between Sarah and Pope, your hair still damp from the ocean. The shell necklace catches the light every time you move, a constant reminder of everything that's changed and everything that hasn't.

"Yo, check it out," John B nudges JJ, nodding toward the entrance where Topper and Rafe are making their way over. The entire table tenses slightly, years of rivalry making everyone wary.

"Hey," Topper says, stopping at their table. He looks different - less aggressive than usual, almost humble. "Just wanted to say... that was some sick surfing today. All of you." His eyes linger on you for a moment longer than necessary, making JJ's jaw clench.

Rafe, surprisingly sober, nods in agreement. "That move in the finals, Maybank? Pretty fucking impressive." He shifts uncomfortably, clearly not used to complimenting pogues. "And Y/N... didn't know you had moves like that."

"Thanks," you reply quietly, your fingers automatically going to the shell necklace. The gesture doesn't go unnoticed by anyone at the table, especially JJ.

"Yeah, well," JJ starts, his voice carrying an edge, but Kiara kicks him under the table. He swallows whatever sarcastic comment he is about to make. "Thanks, man. You weren't half bad either, Topper."

"Listen," Topper says, running a hand through his hair. "We're having a bonfire in Figure Eight tonight. Victory party kind of thing. You guys should come." The invitation hangs in the air, surprising everyone.

Sarah raises an eyebrow at her brother. "Rafe? You're okay with this?"

Rafe shrugs, looking almost uncomfortable. "New leaf and all that shit, right? Besides," he grins, some of his old cockiness returning, "can't let you pogues have all the fun."

The group exchanges looks, years of kook-pogue rivalry making them hesitant. It's Pope who finally speaks up. "Yeah, alright. Could be fun."

"Cool," Topper nods, already backing away. "Starts at nine. Bring whatever." He and Rafe head back to their table, leaving you in stunned silence.

"Did that just happen? Did we just have a civil conversation with Topper and Rafe?" Kiara says surprised.

"End times," Pope declares solemnly, making everyone laugh. "The apocalypse is definitely coming."

"Well, that was weird," John B says, voicing what everyone's thinking. "Think it's a trap?"

"Nah," Sarah shakes her head. "Topper's been different lately. And Rafe... well, rehab changed him. A little, anyway."

JJ snorts, taking another drink. "Still don't trust them." His eyes find you again. "You gonna go?"

The question feels heavier than it should, loaded with implications. You meet his gaze, something unreadable in your expression. "Maybe," you say softly. "Might be nice to see how the other half lives, right?"

The tension at the table shifts, everyone pretending not to notice the way JJ's grip tightens on his beer bottle, or how your fingers haven't left that shell necklace since Topper walked away.

"Well," Kiara stands up, ever the peacemaker, "if we're doing this, we should probably get more food first. Can't show up to a kook party on empty stomachs." She heads toward the kitchen, leaving the others to navigate the complicated dynamics at the table.

The bonfire casts dancing shadows across the beach as JJ stands near the water's edge, the sound of waves mixing with distant laughter and music from the kook party. He's already several beers in, trying to drown out the memories that keep surfacing every time he catches sight of you. The others have conspicuously disappeared - John B and Sarah wandering off toward the dunes, Pope getting caught up in some debate about marine biology with a group of college kids, and Kiara conveniently remembering she needed to help set up the speakers.

You approach quietly, your presence announced only by the soft crunch of sand under your feet. You’ve changed since dinner, wearing a loose white beach dress that catches the firelight, that damn shell necklace still around your neck. Without warning, you reach out and take his beer, replacing it with a bottle of water.

"The fuck, Y/N/N?" JJ protests, the nickname slipping out before he can stop it. His voice is rougher than usual, whether, from the alcohol or emotion, it's hard to tell.

"You've had enough," you say softly, but firmly. "And we both know you get mean when you drink too much." There's no judgment in your voice, just stated fact - you know him too well, even after all this time.

JJ runs a hand through his hair, agitation clear in every movement. "Yeah? And what makes you think you still get to make that call?" The words come out harsh, but he takes a drink from the water bottle anyway.

You settle into the sand, patting the spot next to you. After a moment's hesitation, JJ sits too, maintaining careful distance between you two. The fire casts an orange glow across your skin.

"Remember the last bonfire we were at together?" You ask suddenly, your voice barely audible over the waves. "Before... everything?"

JJ tenses beside you, his fingers digging into the sand. "Don't," he warns, but there's less bite in his voice now. "We're not doing this, Y/N."

"Aren't we?" You turn to look at him fully, the firelight reflecting in your eyes. "Because I think we've been doing this dance since I got back. Everyone sees it, JJ. Even Kiara-"

"Leave Kie out of this," he snaps, but you both know it's a weak protest. His hand unconsciously moves toward yours in the sand before he catches himself. The shell necklace gleams as you shift, drawing his attention. "You kept it," he says suddenly, nodding toward the necklace. "Even in Maine."

"Never took it off," you admit quietly. "Even when they..it was the only piece of home I had left. The only piece of you."

JJ's breath catches at your words, his fingers curling into fists in the sand. The firelight dances across your faces as the party continues behind you, but you might as well be alone on the beach. The sound of waves seems to grow louder, matching the thundering of his heart.

"You can't just..." he starts, his voice cracking.

"You can't just say shit like that, Y/N. Not after... not after everything."

You shift slightly closer, the hem of your white dress brushing against his leg. "Then what can I say, JJ? Because we need to talk about it. About that night. About why I really left." 

"Yeah?" JJ's voice turns sharp, defensive. "What's there to talk about? You made your choice. You left. End of fucking story." But his eyes betray him, constantly drawn to your face, to the necklace, to the way the firelight catches in your hair.

"It wasn't a choice," you say quietly, your voice trembling slightly. "My parents found the letters, JJ. The ones I wrote to you about... about everything. About your dad, about what we were planning..." You take a shaky breath. "About how much I loved you."

JJ's whole body goes rigid at your words. The water bottle crumples in his grip, forgotten. "Stop," he says, but it sounds more like a plea than a command. "Just... fuck, Y/N."

"You want to know why I really left?" You continue, your voice stronger now. "Because that night, after I left your house, after your dad..." you swallow hard. "After I saw what he did to you, I went home and wrote everything down. Every bruise I'd helped you hide, every night you climbed through my window bleeding, every time you flinched when someone moved too fast. I was going to turn him in, JJ. I couldn't watch him hurt you anymore."

The confession hangs in the air between you, heavy as storm clouds. JJ's breathing has become ragged, his jaw clenched so tight it must hurt. Behind you, someone cranks up the music, but it feels distant, muffled like you're underwater.

"My parents found the letters before I could do anything," you continue, your voice barely above a whisper. "They read everything - about us, about your dad, about how we were planning to run away after graduation. They didn't give me a choice, JJ. It was either Maine or..." 

JJ stares at the water, his whole body vibrating with tension as he processes your words. The firelight catches the tears threatening to spill from his eyes, but he blinks them away furiously. His injured hand flexes in the sand, leaving small indentations that quickly fill with darkness.

"You were gonna..." he starts, his voice hoarse. "You were trying to protect me?" A bitter laugh escapes him. "Fuck, Y/N. I thought... all this time I thought you just couldn't handle my shit anymore. Thought you got tired of dealing with the fucked up pogue kid."

You shift closer, close enough that your shoulders brush. The contact sends electricity through both of you. "I could never get tired of you, JJ," you whisper, your voice catching. "Even in Maine, even when they had me so medicated I could barely remember my own name... I never stopped..."

"Don't," he cuts you off roughly, but he doesn't move away. "You can't just come back here and tell me all this shit. You can't just..." he runs his hand through his hair again, agitation clear in every movement. "Fuck, do you know what it did to me? Finding your room empty that morning? Your mom wouldn't tell me anything, just kept saying you were 'getting help' like you were some kind of..." he can't finish the sentence.

"I tried to call," you admit quietly. "That first month, I called your number every day until they took my phone. Left so many voicemails I filled up your inbox." You touch the shell necklace again, a habit he's starting to recognize as nervous comfort. "Did you... did you ever listen to them?"

"Every fucking one. Over and over until the system deleted them." He finally turns to look at you fully, his eyes intense in the firelight. "I still have that old phone. Can't bring myself to throw it away because it's got your last message saved."

The confession hangs between you, heavy with meaning. Behind you, the party continues, but you might as well be alone on the beach. The waves crash steadily, a rhythm you both know by heart from countless night sessions together.

"I kept every letter," You say softly. "The ones they wouldn't let me send. There's a whole box of them under my bed. Three years' worth of things I needed to tell you." Your hand moves unconsciously toward his in the sand, stopping just short of touching.

JJ stares at the ocean for a long moment, processing everything. The firelight dances across his features as he finally turns back to you, his expression raw and vulnerable in a way you haven’t seen since that last night three years ago.

"Every time something good happened, or something shit happened, or just... anything happened, my first thought was always 'I gotta tell Y/N.' Then I'd remember you weren't there anymore." He lets out a shaky breath. "Took me almost a year to stop turning to tell you stuff."

Your hand finally bridges the gap between them, your fingers brushing against his in the sand. Neither of you pulls away. "I did the same thing," you admit. "In group therapy, they'd ask who we missed most from home. I'd always say my parents, but..." You touch the shell necklace with your free hand. "It was always you, JJ. Every single time."

JJ's thumb unconsciously strokes across your knuckles, a gesture so familiar it makes your heartache. "I can't..." He starts, his voice catching. "I can't go through losing you again, Y/N. I barely survived it the first time." The admission costs him, you can see it in the way his jaw clenches, the way his fingers tighten slightly against yours.

"I'm not going anywhere," you whisper, the words carrying on the ocean breeze. "Not this time. Not ever again." You turn your hand in the sand, properly lacing your fingers together. "I'm done running, JJ. From you, from us, from everything."

The silence that follows is heavy with possibility. Behind you, someone calls your names - probably Pope or Sarah looking for you - but neither moves. "We can't just pick up where we left off," JJ finally says, but he doesn't let go of your hand. "Too much has happened. We're different people now."

You nod, understanding in your eyes. "I know. But maybe..." you squeeze his hand gently. "Maybe we can start something new. Something better."

JJ looks at your intertwined hands, then back at your face - at the girl who's haunted his dreams for three years, who's sitting here now in the firelight wearing his necklace and holding his hand like you never left. "Yeah," he says softly, a small, genuine smile finally breaking through. "Maybe we can."

The party continues behind you, but you stay there on the beach, hands linked, watching the waves and starting the long process of healing what was broken. It's not perfect, and it's not fixed, but it's a beginning. And sometimes, that's enough.

The moonlight streams through your bedroom window as you and JJ slip inside, your footsteps quiet on the hardwood floors. Your room looks different than JJ remembers - new paint, new decorations, but somehow still unmistakably you. The fairy lights strung across the ceiling cast a soft glow over everything, creating shadows that dance across the walls.

JJ hovers near the door, hands shoved in his pockets as he watches you drop to your knees beside the bed. The fabric of your dress ghosting around your legs as you reach under the bed frame. His shell necklace catches the light as you move, making his chest tight with memories.

"It's here somewhere," You mutter, pushing aside boxes and old notebooks. "I kept everything organized when I moved back, but..." you trail off, stretching further under the bed. 

JJ forces himself to look away, focusing instead on the photos newly tacked to your wall. Most are recent - your time in Maine, new friends, new places. But there, in the corner, partially hidden behind others, he spots one that makes his breath catch. It's you two, three years ago, on the beach after a night session. His arm is around your shoulders, both of you grinning at the camera, saltwater still dripping from your hair.

"Found it!" Your voice pulls him back to the present. You emerge from under the bed with a large shoebox, worn at the edges and covered in doodles. Your hands shake slightly as you set it on the bed, looking up at JJ with uncertainty in your eyes.

"That's... all of them?" JJ asks, his voice rougher than intended. He takes a step closer, drawn by the box like a magnet. Three years of words you couldn't say, couldn't send, all contained in one shoebox.

You nod, sitting cross-legged on the bed beside the box. "Every letter I wrote. Every time I missed you, every time something reminded me of you, every time I..." you trail off, fingers tracing the edge of the box. "Every time I needed you to know I still loved you."

The admission hangs in the air between you, heavy with possibility. JJ moves closer, perching on the edge of the bed, careful to maintain some distance. The fairy lights cast soft shadows across your face as you open the box, revealing stacks of envelopes, some crisp and new, others worn from being handled repeatedly.

"You don't have to read them now," you say quickly, noticing how JJ's hands have started to shake. "I just... I needed you to know they existed. That I never stopped trying to reach you, even when I couldn't actually send them."

The tension breaks as he lets out a snort of laughter, picking up one of the envelopes. "Your handwriting still looks like shit, Y/N," he teases, falling easily back into your old dynamic. "Seriously, did they not teach penmanship in Maine?"

You gasp in mock offense, snatching the letter from his hands. "Excuse you, this is art." You fought back a smile though, relief evident in your features at his attempt to lighten the mood. "Not all of us can have perfect surfer boy handwriting."

"Perfect?" JJ grins, reaching for another letter. "Have you seen my grocery lists? Even Pope can't read them." He settles more comfortably on the bed, his earlier hesitation melting away. "Oh shit, this one's got little hearts drawn all over it. Fucking sap."

"Shut up," You laugh, shoving his shoulder playfully. "I was heavily medicated and missing your stupid face." You pull out another letter, this one covered in doodles of waves and surfboards. "Oh god, my therapy art phase. We don't talk about this one."

JJ snatches it before you can hide it, his eyes scanning the page with growing amusement. "Holy fuck, is that supposed to be me?" He points to a stick figure with spiky hair riding a wave. "My hair does not look like that!"

"It absolutely does when you first wake up," you argue, reaching for the letter. JJ holds it above his head, laughing as you try to grab it. "JJ Maybank, give that back!"

"Make me," he challenges, his blue eyes sparkling with mischief. It feels like old times - him in your room, playfully arguing about nothing important, the weight of your earlier conversation temporarily lifted.

You lunge for the letter, causing you both to tumble backward onto your bed, letters scattering around you. JJ's still holding the drawing above his head, grinning as you try to reach it. "You're such an ass," you complain, but you're laughing too.

"Yeah, but you missed this ass," he quips, then freezes slightly, worried he's pushed too far. But You just roll your eyes, finally managing to snatch the letter back.

"Unfortunately," you sigh dramatically, settling beside him among the scattered letters. "Though I'm starting to question my judgment."

JJ clutches his chest in mock hurt. "Wow, three years and you're already tired of me? That's cold, Y/N. Ice cold." He picks up another letter, this one dated from about a year ago. "Oh look, more hearts. And are those little JJs surfing?"

"I'm going to murder you," you threaten, but there's no heat in it. You're watching him with soft eyes, taking in how the fairy lights cast shadows across his face, how his smile reaches his eyes for the first time since you’ve been back.

"Nah, you love me too much," he says automatically, then stills as he realizes what he's said. The playful atmosphere wavers for a moment, the weight of your history threatening to crash back in.

But you just smile, reaching out to fix his messy hair. "Yeah," you say softly. "I do."

The admission is simple, honest, lacking the heavy emotion of your beach conversation. JJ looks at you, really looks at you, surrounded by three years worth of letters you wrote to him, wearing his necklace, smiling at him like nothing's changed and everything's changed all at once.

"Well, shit," he says finally, a grin tugging at his lips. "That's convenient. 'Cause I might still love you too."

The moment stretches between you, charged with three years of unspoken feelings until JJ finally closes the distance. His lips meet yours softly at first, hesitant, like he's afraid you might disappear if he pushes too hard. His hand comes up to cup your face, thumb brushing across your cheekbone as letters crinkle beneath you.

You respond immediately, your fingers threading through his hair as you pull him closer. The kiss deepens, three years of longing and regret and love pouring into it. JJ tastes like ocean and bonfire smoke, exactly how you remember.

"Fuck," JJ breathes against your lips, pulling back slightly. His blue eyes are dark with emotion as he looks at you, his thumb still tracing patterns on your skin. "I've missed this. Missed you." His voice is rough, and vulnerable in a way he rarely allows himself to be.

You smile, tugging gently at his hair. "Yeah?" You tease, though your voice trembles slightly. "Even with my shit handwriting?"

JJ laughs, the sound rumbling through his chest where it's pressed against yours. "Especially with your shit handwriting," he murmurs, before capturing your lips again. This kiss is different - deeper, more urgent. His hand slides from your face to your neck, fingers brushing against the shell necklace.

You shift on the bed, letters scattering to the floor forgotten as you pull JJ closer. His weight settles over you naturally, like you never spent time apart. The fairy lights cast a soft glow over them, creating shadows that dance across your skin.

"Is this okay?" JJ asks between kisses, his forehead resting against yours. Despite his usual confidence, there's uncertainty in his voice. "We don't have to..."

You cut him off with another kiss, your hands sliding under his t-shirt to trace the familiar planes of his back. "JJ," you whisper against his lips. "Shut up."

He grins against your mouth, some of his usual cockiness returning. "Make me," he challenges, echoing your earlier playful banter. But there's heat in his voice now, promise in the way his fingers trail down your sides tracing the curve of your waist through the thin fabric of your white dress. His touch is familiar and electric, leaving trails of heat in its wake. The fairy lights cast a soft glow over them as he captures your lips again, deeper this time, more urgent.

"Fuck, Y/N," he breathes against your mouth, his voice rough with want. His fingers find the hem of your dress, playing with the fabric as he kisses down your neck. "Tell me if you want me to stop."

"Don't you dare," you whisper, tugging at his hair the way you know he likes, The action draws a low groan from him, his hips pressing instinctively against yours. JJ pulls back slightly, his blue eyes dark with desire as he looks down at you. The shell necklace gleams against your skin, making his chest tight with emotion. He leans down, pressing open-mouthed kisses along your collarbone, following the path of the necklace.

"You're wearing too many clothes," he murmurs against your skin, his hands sliding higher under your dress. His touch is reverent, relearning every curve and dip of your body. When his fingers brush against the lace of your underwear, you both inhale sharply.

You tug at his shirt impatiently. "So are you," you breathe, helping him pull it over his head your hands immediately explore his chest. "God, I've missed touching you."

JJ's response is to kiss you again, hard and deep, as his hands work to dress up your body. "Lift up," he instructs softly, and you arch your back so he can pull the fabric over your head. The sight of you in just your underwear, his necklace resting between your breasts, makes him pause.

"What?" You ask, suddenly self-conscious under his intense gaze. But JJ just shakes his head, leaning down to press kisses across your chest.

"Just..." he murmurs between kisses, "trying to memorize everything." His hands slide up your sides, thumbs brushing the undersides of your breasts through your bra. "In case this is a dream."

You reach up to touch JJ's face tenderly, your thumb tracing his bottom lip. "Not a dream," you whisper, pulling him down for another deep kiss. Your legs wrap around his waist, drawing him closer as his hands explore your body with increasing urgency.

JJ's fingers trace the edge of your bra, his touch teasing yet reverent. "Can I...?" he asks against your lips, and you nod, arching your back so he can reach the clasp. His hands are slightly shaky as he unhooks it like he still can't quite believe this is real.

"Fuck," he breathes as the garment falls away, revealing your breasts. The shell necklace rests between them, catching the fairy lights. JJ leans down, pressing open-mouthed kisses across your chest. His tongue traces patterns on your skin, remembering exactly how to make you gasp.

Your hands tangle in his hair as he takes a nipple into his mouth, your back arching off the bed. "JJ," you moan softly, mindful of the quiet house. His free hand palms your other breast, thumb circling the sensitive peak until you're squirming beneath him.

"Missed these sounds," JJ murmurs against your skin, switching his attention to your other breast. "Missed making you fall apart." His hand slides down your stomach, fingers playing with the waistband of your underwear. "Can still remember every spot that makes you shake."

To prove his point, he kisses down your ribs to that sensitive spot just below your left breast - the one that always makes you gasp. Sure enough, your breath hitches, your fingers tightening in his hair. "Still so responsive," he grins against your skin, nipping gently.

"Shut up," you breathe, but there's no heat in it. Your hands slide down his back, nails dragging lightly across his skin in the way you know drives him crazy. JJ groans, his hips pressing against yours instinctively.

"Make me," he challenges, echoing your earlier banter as he kisses lower, across your stomach. His fingers hook into your underwear, but he pauses, looking up at you with dark eyes. "Tell me you want this, Y/N/N. Tell me you want me."

You prop yourself up on your elbows, looking down at him with eyes full of love and desire. The fairy lights cast shadows across his face, highlighting the intensity of his gaze. "I want you, JJ," you whisper. "Always have, always will."

When you reach the waistband of his shorts, he groans softly against your neck. "Can I?" You ask, fingers playing with the button of his shorts. JJ nods against your skin, his breath hot on your neck as you work the button free. The sound of his zipper seems loud in the quiet room.

JJ helps you slide his shorts down his legs, his breath catching as your fingers trace the waistband of his boxers. The fairy lights cast a soft glow over his skin, highlighting the muscles that flex under your touch. "Fuck, Y/N," he breathes as your hand palms him through the thin fabric. His hips buck involuntarily, seeking more friction. "You're gonna kill me."

You smirk up at him, enjoying the way his breath hitches as you hook your fingers in his boxers. "That's the plan," you tease, slowly pulling the fabric down. JJ kicks them off impatiently, leaving him completely bare above you.

His hands slide up your thighs, fingers playing with the edge of your underwear. "These need to go," he murmurs, pressing open-mouthed kisses along your hip bone. "Want to taste you again."

You lift your hips, letting him slide the lace down your legs. The shell necklace gleams against your skin as you move, drawing JJ's attention. He leans down, pressing kisses along the chain until he reaches the shell pendant resting between your breasts.

"Still can't believe you kept it," he whispers against your skin, his hands exploring your now-bare body with increasing urgency. "Kept wearing it all this time."

"Never took it off," you breathe, arching into his touch as his fingers trace patterns on your inner thighs. "It was like keeping a piece of you with me."

JJ groans at your words, capturing your lips in a deep kiss. His hand slides higher, fingers teasing where you want him most. "Tell me what you need," he murmurs against your mouth. "Want to make you feel good."

Your response is cut off by a gasp as his fingers find where you need him. Your hands clutch at his shoulders, "You," you manage to say. "Just you, JJ. Always you."

JJ's fingers trace slow, teasing circles against your sensitive flesh, watching with dark eyes as you arch beneath his touch. His other hand explores your body with reverent familiarity, relearning every curve and dip that he's missed for three long years. The fairy lights cast shifting shadows across your bare skin as you move together on your bed. "Fuck, you're so wet already," JJ breathes against your neck, his voice rough with desire. His fingers slide lower, teasing your entrance as his thumb continues its maddening circles. "Always so responsive for me, Y/N."

JJ can't resist leaning down to trace the chain of the necklace with his tongue, following its path down to where it rests against your sternum. "Please," you gasp as he slides one finger inside you, your legs spreading wider to accommodate him. "JJ, I need..."

"Tell me," he murmurs against your skin, adding a second finger and curling them just right. "Want to hear you say it, baby. Tell me what you need." Your response is cut off by a moan as his thumb presses harder, his fingers finding that spot inside you that makes you see stars. JJ watches your face intently, memorizing every expression of pleasure that crosses your features. His cock throbs insistently against your thigh, but he ignores it, focused entirely on making you fall apart.

"You," you finally manage, your voice breathy and desperate. "Need you inside me, JJ. Please."

JJ groans at your words, his control wavering. But he forces himself to maintain his slow pace, wanting to draw this out, to make it last. His fingers continue their steady rhythm as he kisses down your body, paying special attention to each sensitive spot he remembers.

"Not yet," he whispers against your hip bone, nipping gently at the skin there. "Want to taste you first. Been dreaming about this for three years, Y/N. Gonna take my time."

JJ settles between your thighs, his hot breath teasing your sensitive flesh as he presses open-mouthed kisses along your inner thighs. His fingers maintain their steady rhythm inside you, curling just right. "Missed how you taste," he murmurs against your thigh, nipping gently at the sensitive skin. "Missed making you fall apart like this." His free hand slides up your body to palm your breast, thumb circling your nipple as he finally presses his tongue against your clit.

Your back arches off the bed, one hand tangling in his salt-stiffened hair while the other grips your sheets. The shell necklace catches the light as you move, a constant reminder of your shared history. "JJ," you gasp, trying to keep your voice down despite the pleasure coursing through you.

JJ hums against you, the vibration making your thighs tremble. His tongue traces patterns around your clit as his fingers continue their steady thrusting, finding that perfect spot inside you that makes you see stars. He watches your face intently, memorizing every expression of pleasure that crosses your features.

"That's it, baby," he murmurs, pulling back slightly to blow cool air against your heated flesh. "Want to see you come apart for me. Been too fucking long." His words are punctuated by another curl of his fingers, another swipe of his tongue.

Your hips buck against his face as he sucks your clit into his mouth, your breathing becoming more ragged. JJ's free hand slides down to hold your hips steady, his grip firm but gentle. "Close," you manage to gasp, your fingers tightening in his hair. "JJ, I'm so close..."

JJ doubles his efforts, his tongue moving faster as his fingers maintain their perfect rhythm. He can feel your walls beginning to flutter around his fingers and can taste how close you are. "Come for me, Y/N, Want to feel you fall apart on my tongue."

The combination of his words, his fingers, and his tongue finally pushes you over the edge. Tour back arches sharply, your thighs trembling as waves of pleasure crash over you. JJ works you through it, his movements becoming gentler as you come down from your high.

When he finally pulls back, his lips are glistening and his eyes are dark with desire. He presses soft kisses up your body as you catch your breath, paying special attention to the shell necklace that rests between your breasts. His cock presses insistently against your thigh, but he makes no move to rush things.

"Beautiful," he murmurs against your neck, nipping gently at your pulse point. "Fucking beautiful, Y/N. Missed watching you come undone like that."

Your hands slide down his back, nails dragging lightly across his skin in a way that makes him shiver. "Need you," you whisper, pulling him up for a deep kiss. You taste yourself on his tongue, making you moan softly. "Please, JJ. Need you inside me."

JJ positions himself between your thighs, his cock pressing teasingly against your entrance. The fairy lights cast shadows across your sweat-slicked bodies as he captures your lips in a deep, passionate kiss. "Need you to be sure," he murmurs against your lips, his voice rough with desire and emotion. "Tell me this is what you want, Y/N." His cock slides against your wetness, making you both gasp at the sensation. 

You wrap your legs around his waist, pulling him closer. "I'm sure, JJ," you breathe, your hands sliding up his back to tangle in his hair. "Been sure since the day I left. Want you, need you, love you."

JJ groans at your words, capturing your lips again as he slowly pushes inside you. You both freeze at the sensation, overwhelmed by the feeling of being connected again after so long. "Fuck," he breathes against your neck, his arms trembling as he holds himself still. "You feel fucking perfect, baby."

Your nails dig into his shoulders as you adjust to his size, your breath coming in short gasps. The fairy lights dance across your skin as you start to move together, finding your rhythm like you’ve never spent a day apart. JJ's movements are slow, and deliberate, wanting to savor every moment.

"Missed this," he murmurs, pressing open-mouthed kisses along your neck. "Missed you, missed us." His words are punctuated by slow, deep thrusts that make you gasp and arch beneath him. One hand slides down to grip your hip, angling you just right.

The shell necklace moves with each thrust, catching the light and drawing JJ's attention. He leans down to trace it with his tongue, following its path between your breasts. The action makes you moan softly, your walls clenching around him.

"JJ," you gasp as he hits that perfect spot inside you. "Please, need more." Your hands slide down his back, nails leaving light scratches that make him groan and thrust harder.

He continues his slow, deliberate pace, savoring every gasp and moan that escapes your lips. His hands explore your body with increasing urgency, one sliding down to grip your thigh as he adjusts the angle of his thrusts. "Fuck," he groans against your neck, nipping gently at your pulse point. "Feel so good around me, so fucking perfect." His words are punctuated by deep, measured thrusts that make your walls clench around him. The shell necklace gleams between your breasts, moving with each roll of his hips.

Your hands slide up his back, nails leaving light scratches that make him shudder. "Please, JJ," you gasp, your legs tightening around his waist. "Need more, need you harder." Your voice is breathy, and desperate, making his control waver.

But JJ maintains his torturously slow pace, wanting to draw out every moment. His free hand slides between them to circle your clit, making your back arch sharply off the bed. "Not yet, baby," he murmurs, capturing your lips in a deep kiss. "Want to feel every inch of you, want to make this last."

JJ's thumb continues its maddening circles on your clit as he thrusts deeper, hitting that spot inside you that makes you see stars. "JJ," You moan, your walls fluttering around him as you get closer to the edge. "I'm close, so close..." 

His thrusts become slightly harder, and deeper, but still maintain that measured pace that's driving you both crazy. JJ's free hand slides up to palm your breast, thumb circling your nipple as he continues to work you higher. The combination of sensations has you gasping his name, your body trembling beneath him.

JJ grins against your lips, his hands sliding down to grip your hips. "Want to try something?" he asks, his voice rough with desire. Without waiting for an answer, he suddenly rolls you over, keeping himself buried deep inside you as you end up straddling his lap.

"Fuck," You gasp at the new angle, your hands braced against his chest as you adjust. The shell necklace swings between you, catching the fairy lights as you move. JJ's hands slide up your thighs, gripping your hips as he guides you into a slow rhythm.

"That's it, baby," he groans, watching as you start to move above him. Your breasts bounce slightly with each movement, making his mouth water. "Ride my cock just like that." His hands explore your body freely from this new position, one sliding up to palm your breast while the other keeps a steady grip on your hip.

You set a torturously slow pace, rolling your hips in a way that has JJ cursing under his breath. Your walls clench around him with each movement, drawing low groans from deep in his chest. "Missed watching you like this," JJ breathes, his hands roaming your body possessively. He sits up slightly, capturing a nipple in his mouth as you continue to ride him. 

His hands guide your movements, helping you maintain that slow, deep pace that's driving you both crazy.

"JJ," You moan as he hits that perfect spot inside you. Your nails drag down his chest, leaving light scratches that make him buck up into you harder. 

JJ's control starts to slip as he watches you move above him, your head thrown back in pleasure. "Fuck, Y/N," he groans, his hands tightening on your hips. "You look so fucking good riding my cock like this."

He watches in awe as you continue to ride him, your movements becoming more confident with each roll of your hips. His hands slide up your sides, thumbs brushing the undersides of your breasts as you move above him. "Fuck, just like that," he groans, bucking up to meet your movements. His hands grip your hips tighter, guiding you into a rhythm that has you both gasping. 

You brace your hands on his chest, using the leverage to grind down harder. Your walls clench around him with each movement, drawing curses from his lips. "JJ," you moan, your head falling back as he hits that perfect spot inside you. "So deep like this..."

JJ works faster on your clit as he continues to thrust up into you, hitting that spot that makes you see stars. You gasp, and your movements become more desperate. He suddenly pulls out of you, making you whimper at the loss. His chest heaves with heavy breaths as he tries to regain some control, his cock throbbing painfully between you. 

"Need to slow down," he groans against your lips, his hands sliding up your sides. "Don't want this to end yet." His fingers trace patterns on your skin as you straddle his thighs. Your hands slide down his chest, nails dragging lightly across his skin in a way that makes him shiver. "JJ," you whimper, trying to move closer. Your pussy is dripping wet, clenching around nothing as you seek friction.

"Fuck, you're so wet for me," his fingers slid between your legs to tease your entrance. He watches as you gasp and arches into his touch, your walls fluttering around his fingers. "Could stay here all night, just watching you fall apart."

You rock against his hand, seeking more friction. JJ's free hand slides up to palm your breast, thumb circling your nipple as he continues to tease you with shallow thrusts of his fingers. "Please," you moan, your hands gripping his shoulders for support. "Need you back inside me, JJ. Been too long without you."

You shift in JJ's lap, deliberately grinding against his thigh. The friction makes you gasp, your wetness coating his skin as you rock your hips. His hands gripping your hips to guide your movements. "Fuck, Y/N," he groans, feeling your pussy slide against his thigh. "You're so fucking wet." His fingers dig into your flesh, leaving marks that will be visible tomorrow. 

Your hands brace against his chest for leverage as you grind harder, chasing the friction you need. The shell necklace swings between you with each movement, occasionally brushing against his heated skin. "JJ," you moan, your head falling back as pleasure builds.

JJ's free hand slides between them, thumb finding your clit as you continue to grind against him. "Please, more, need you inside me again." Your words are punctuated by the roll of your hips, your pussy sliding against his thigh with increasing urgency.

His thumb works faster on your clit as you ride his thigh, drawing you closer to release. "Come like this first," he commands roughly. You continue grinding against JJ's thigh, your movements becoming more desperate as pleasure builds. Your wetness coats his skin, making each slide of your pussy against him smoother, more intense. JJ's hands grip your hips tighter, guiding your movements as he watches you chase your release. 

"Want to feel you soak my thigh before I fuck you properly." JJ’s words, combined with the pressure on your clit and the friction against his thigh, finally push you over the edge. Your body trembles as waves of pleasure crash over you, your pussy pulsing against JJ's thigh as you come. Your wetness coats his skin, making everything slick and hot between you. 

"Fuck, that's it," His cock throbs painfully between you, demanding attention. "So fucking beautiful when you come." His thumb continues to circle your clit, drawing out your pleasure until your gasping and squirming.

Without warning, JJ flips them over, pinning you beneath him on the bed. His cock slides through your wetness, teasing your sensitive flesh. "Need to be inside you again," he groans, capturing your lips in a deep, passionate kiss. "Been too fucking long without this."

You wrap your legs around his waist, pulling him closer. "Please, JJ," you whimper, still sensitive from your orgasm. Your walls clench around nothing, seeking the fullness of his cock. "Need you inside me."

JJ lines himself up with your entrance, watching your face as he slowly pushes back inside. You both groan at the sensation, your walls stretching to accommodate him again.  "Fuck, still so tight," JJ breathes, setting a slow, deep pace. His hands explore your body possessively as he thrusts into you, memorizing every curve and dip. "Feel so good."

Your hands slide up his back, nails leaving light scratches that make him shudder. Your pussy pulses around him with each thrust, drawing low groans from deep in his chest. JJ maintains his deep, steady rhythm as he thrusts into you, his hands gripping your hips with bruising force. "I’m close," you gasp, your hands clutching at his shoulders for support. "So close, JJ. Please don't stop."

His hand slides between them to circle your clit as he maintains his punishing pace. "Come for me again," he commands. His thrusts become more erratic as he feels his release approaching, his grip on your hips tightening with bruising force. The fairy lights cast dancing shadows across their sweat-slicked bodies as they move together with increasing urgency. Without warning, he suddenly pulls out, his cock throbbing painfully between you.

"Fuck," he groans, his hand wrapping around his length as he strokes himself. "Where do you want it, baby?" His eyes are dark with desire as he watches you beneath him, your chest heaving with heavy breaths.

Your hands slide up his chest, nails dragging lightly across his skin. "On me," you gasp, still trembling from your release. 

JJ's control finally snaps at your words. With a low groan, he comes hard, painting thick stripes across your stomach and breasts. The shell necklace gleams in the fairy lights, covered in drops of his release.

You collapse together on the bed, breathing heavily as you come down from your high. JJ reaches for his discarded t-shirt, gently cleaning his release from your skin. "Stay," you whisper, curling into his side. Your fingers trace patterns on his chest as your breathing slowly returns to normal. "Please stay this time."

JJ pulls you closer, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead. "Not going anywhere," he murmurs against your skin. "Never again." The fairy lights continue to cast their soft glow over the room as you drift off to sleep, tangled together like they never spent a day apart.

His phone buzzes on the nightstand, the screen illuminating the dim room with a soft blue glow. He groans softly, careful not to wake you who's curled against his chest, your breathing deep and even. 

The group chat notification shows several messages from John B and Pope:

John B: yo where tf did you and y/n disappear to??? 👀

Pope: they definitely left together bro

John B: fucking FINALLY

Pope: 20 bucks says they're at her place

John B: nah man, bet they're at the chateau

JJ can't help but grin at his friends' messages, his free hand absently playing with your hair as you sleep.

His phone buzzes again:

John B: JJ we know you're reading these messages asshole

Pope: let him live, he's probably busy 😏

John B: BUSY WITH WHAT POPE??? 🤔😂

JJ rolls his eyes, typing out a quick response with one hand:

"fuck off both of you”

The response is immediate:

John B: HE LIVES!!!

Pope: told you they were together

John B: you better not fuck this up again maybank

JJ's jaw tenses at John B's last message, his arm tightening slightly around your sleeping form. The fairy lights cast soft shadows across your peaceful face as he looks down at you, remembering everything you’ve been through to get here. The shell necklace rests between you, a constant reminder of your shared past and the promise of your future but for now, in this room with its fairy lights and scattered memories, nothing exists beyond the two of you.

[maybanksprincess]

trouble sleeping? // j.m

warnings: fluff, cuddling, kissing, pet names.

summary: jjs girlfriend is having trouble sleeping <3

small blurb for my baby @jjblunts requested by this ask, i hope you like it!

for a couple days now, you've been having sleeping problems. when you lay in bed, you toss and turn for hours until you fall asleep, waking up with a sore back and grouchy from the lack of sleep.

however, jj has been noticing the slight changes in appearance and mood from you. he's been noticing dark circles starting to form, and the way you've been super quiet all day, and drinking multiple cups of coffee to stay awake.

he didnt know what was going on, but he knew he wanted to help. so tonight, instead of laying on the couch, he comes in to sleep with you instead.

you had been laying on your back, desperately trying to get just an ounce of sleep, but there was no use. you let out a huff of frustration and turn onto your side, hugging the pillows close to you.

as your fighting to fall asleep, you hear the door creaking, meaning someone has entered the room. you open you eyes to see the blonde standing above you.

he reaches down to carress your cheek, rubbing the pad of his thumb across it. "hey babydoll. you cant sleep?" he asks softly.

you smile softly up at him, a tired and weak smile on your face. "no..." you shake your head.

he sighs, sliding into bed next to you gently moving you over by your waist to make room for him. "why didn't you tell me baby? you know i would've came to sleep with you." he says, running his fingers through your hair gently.

you lean into his touch, resting your head on his pec. "i dunno, didn't wanna bother you..."

he chuckles softly "baby your never bothering me. jus' go to sleep, hm?" he says, and moves your hair away from your face to kiss your forehead.

within minutes, your softly snoring in his arms, your face buried in the crook of his neck.

he smiles, pressing his lips to yours in a gentle kiss. "sweet dreams, sweetheart." he says before falling asleep, holding your body against his protectively.

[amandabbbbb]

summary: rafe who protects maybank!reader from luke bc jj is too busy finding gold to protect his sister

tw: parental abuse, mention of drugs, rafes sweet but kinda demanding

word count: 526

you covered a shift working at the wreck because kie could never be bothered to take a shift at her dad’s restaurant, too busy running around the island trying to find whatever gold bullshit that john b has got your brother’s friends and him hung up on. you call jj, overwhelmed from the morning of dealing with your father luke’s fit of rage.

“are you gonna be home tonight? dad just bought a bunch of drugs from barry’s and i don’t want to be alone. i’m scared.”

“sis, you know i love ya, but do you want our lives to get better or not? i’m tryna get us out of this hell, alright? so just stay in your room and don’t come out. love ya, bye.”

he hung up before you could squeeze in another cry for help. just as your salty tears fall, rafe cameron motions you over to give him his bill. you wipe your tears away and give him the fakest smile. he orders you to sit in the opposite empty chair.

“are you alright, sweetheart? i heard that. you know, i know your dad’s a druggie dick. i’ve seen him at barry’s. I gotta get you out of that house. i see your bruises. you know all that makeup doesn’t cover it.” he grabs your arm and rolls up your sleeve, showing your bruise from your father. you, flustered, pull away as his tone was demanding.

before you could even respond, kie’s words ring in your ears: “rafe cameron wouldn’t be caught dead eating here, especially alone. he usually spends his time at the country club. to a kook like him, the wreck is a dump. but ever since you started working there, he always sits at the same table almost every day, staring at you your whole shift, and if you aren’t his waitress, he makes a huge fuss. he’s so sweet to you, always.”

“rafe, really, i’m alright. don’t worry about me.”

“stay at mine tonight, y/n. i’ll take care of you.” he sets 1000 dollars down on the table. he usually gives you a 100 or 200 dollar tip but never this much. you barely know rafe.

“rafe, no. i can’t take this. i don’t even know… uh, uh, rafe, i can’t.”

“stop mumbling and take it. your dad spends all his money on drugs and your brother’s too goddamn worried about god knows what to even be home to take care of you. so i’m going to man up and protect you, okay? so shut up.”

that night after your shift, you stay at rafe’s house. he lets you stay in sarah’s room since the camerons are away. for the first time in ages, you finally relax, safe from your abusive father. you fall asleep almost instantly, exhausted from the stress. rafe makes sure you’re comfortable, checking on you throughout the night. when you wake up in the morning, you find a note and breakfast waiting for you. the note reads:

“good morning, sweetheart. had to run some errands. i know we’re very different but i know what you’re going through. stay as long as you need. you’re safe here. - rafe.”

[thewritergx]

Texts between JJ’s little sister and secret bf!Rafe

Fucked around and got myself addicted to making these. Here's the smut to go with this: Lavender

[personapeters]

✰ 𝐭𝐞𝐱𝐭𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐛𝐨𝐲𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝!𝐣𝐣 (1)

— random texts with your boyfriend, jj maybank

rating: sfw — cw: slightly suggestive — links: one • two

 personapeters 2024 — all rights reserved • masterlist

[vampiriito]

Summer was due for another thank you.. (JJ Maybank X shy! kook! reader ) Chapter 6

A/N: Hey loves! valentine's day special hehe ;), we're finally getting something from these two, like.. it was about damn time.

Summary: After JJ ends up spending the night in your bed and in your arms, he promises himself he's not gonna crush on someone as unattainable as you, but the universe has other plans on how his night at the kegger ends.

Maisy was convinced JJ was ignoring you after that night because he was scared of his feelings, that had to be it in the mind of the strawberry blonde. Her voice boomed excitedly through the speaker of your poor phone as you got ready unenthused, gesturing wildly as if she was right there in your room, and not on a facetime call, by the pool and in another city surrounded by other people. You had promised, no—swore that you wouldn't listen to her stupid ideas and advice. Her life was chaotic and her guardian angel probably needed a cigarette after every decision she took.

But here you were, standing awkwardly on the edge of the Boneyard, your eyes scanning the people having fun at the kegger. This kept getting stranger, and quite frankly pathetic for you..

Since JJ had slept over at your house, after the fight with his dad, almost a week ago; you couldn't help but feel like the interaction had been left unfinished in a way. But as you stood there glancing around at the couples and friend groups which were already drunk, despite it being very early, you couldn't help but feel like it was a bad idea. Your fingers were fidgeting with the hem of your sage green satin summer dress, sparing an almost disgusted glance down at the soft fabric adorned with small pink flowers. 'I should've stayed home' you thought, your mind already writhing in social anxiety. He obviously had no interest in talking to you after the whole strange ordeal of waking up in your room and in your arms save for the occasional smile and wave (which was probably from politeness now that you thought about it), so why were you here?

The sun had just dipped below the horizon, casting a warm, golden glow over the sandy beach. The sky was a canvas of swirling purples, pinks, and deep blues, with stars beginning to twinkle as the night settled in. A large bonfire crackled at the center of the gathering, its flames dancing and casting flickering light on the faces of those gathered around. The bonfire was the heart of the event, providing warmth and a focal point for the evening's activities.

Beach blankets and towels were spread out in a semi-circle around the fire, with groups of friends lounging on them, laughing, and sharing stories. Coolers and portable speakers were scattered throughout the area, playing a mix of R&B music and the occasional pop song that added to the lively atmosphere. The sound of waves gently crashing against the shore provided a soothing backdrop to the party, blending harmoniously with the laughter and chatter of the attendees.

A keg, the star of the show, stood prominently near the bonfire, with a line of people waiting to fill their red Solo cups. Surfboards and beach gear were propped up in the sand, and a few adventurous souls took turns riding the waves illuminated by the moonlight. Others played beach volleyball or tossed a frisbee, their silhouettes barely visible in the dim light. The camaraderie was palpable, with everyone enjoying the carefree spirit of the night.

Except for you, of course. How in the hell did Maisy convince you to go to a kegger alone, you didn't know either. Unsolved mystery.

JJ stood a few feet away, with John B and Pope, drinking beers and chatting. His attention was half-focused on their conversation, but his eyes kept flicking towards you, standing awkwardly off to the side of the party. He couldn't help but notice how out of place you looked, your pretty dress standing out among the casual outfits of the Pogues and Kooks alike. If you could even call them that. Most of them were either topless of in bikinis.

His eyes lingered on you for a moment, taking in your nervous fiddling with the hem of your dress, the way you seemed uncomfortable and out of place in the crowded party environment.

But he made no efort to walk up to you too scared and unsure, and you didn't notice him, despite, secretly looking for him. You took small hesitant steps forward, further onto the beach and away from the spot you were in a few moments ago. You hated crowds and cheap beer, so why were you at a kegger? alone too? Cause you were dumb that's why.

You weaved through the crowds and tried not to bump into people as you made you way around the beach mindlessly, no purpose in mind, just trying not to have a panic attack hopefully. Stopping next to a cooler you pried it open, kneeling down next to it to grab a can of... something. You weren't sure what you were drinking here, seltzer maybe? But oh, well. Alcohol is liquid courage.. or confidence, you didn't remember how the saying went. You needed both of those, anyway.

As you knelt down next to the cooler, the fabric of your dress hugging your figure in a way that accentuated your curves, JJ's eyes couldn't help but be drawn to you. He felt a jolt of... something. Attraction, definitely, but also a hint of something else, something inexplicable inside him, a feeling he couldn't quite place. For a moment, he just stared, his mind going blank.

Finally, he snapped out of it, suddenly aware that John B and Pope had stopped their conversation and were now staring at him with curious smirks.

Pope cleared his throat, nudging JJ with an elbow, a hint of mischief in his eyes. "Yo, JJ... seeing something you like there?"

John B chuckled, also noticing where JJ's gaze had been fixed. "Looks like our resident flirt has found his next target."

JJ tried to play it cool, rolling his eyes at his friends. He didn't want to admit to them that, yes, he was indeed "seeing something he liked" and that he couldn't tear his gaze away from that "something"

He grumbled, trying to sound nonchalant. "Oh, shut it, man. Just... just checking out the crowd, y'know. That's all."

John B exchanged a knowing look with Pope, before both of them broke out into grins.

"Yeah, sure. Checking out the crowd, my ass. You were eye-fucking her. We're not blind, JJ." Pope chimed in, amused by JJ's denial.

John B added with a smirk, "And who can blame you? She looks good tonight. Like, really good."

JJ felt his cheeks heat up at his friends' teasing. They were right, he was definitely checking you out, ogling at you in that damn dress that kinda looked like a night gown now that he thought about it. He couldn't help it. You looked so different from your usual self, the soft, pretty dress a stark contrast to your usual jeans and oversized hoodies that you wore for skating, your hair usually tied up in a ponytail, now loose and falling past your shoulders in beautiful curls. He swallowed, trying to find an excuse, something to hide how he was really feeling.

"I... it's just... you know who that is, right?"

The guys both nodded, sharing another amused smirk between themselves. John B chimed up first, chuckling. JJ was trying to act nonchalant, but both of them could see how flustered he was. They rarely saw JJ flustered like this, especially over a girl. "That the chick you got stuck in the closet in? The 'mouse' one? You trying to make a move on her or what?"

JJ groaned in frustration, feeling cornered at the annoying barrage of questions and knowing looks from his best friends. He didn't want to admit to them, or even himself, how attracted he was to you that night. He couldn't explain it. Sure, you'd always been cute, in a nerdy, quiet way. But seeing you all dolled up, dressed up in that pretty dress for the first time ever... it was doing things to him. Things that he was trying to desperately ignore since you helped him out that night.

He took a deep breath, trying to regain his usual aloof attitude. "I... I don't know, man. It's not that simple."

Unbeknownst to the conversation that was unfolding about you a few good feet away, you stood up straight, studying the can of alcohol you picked up from the cooler, snapping the lid shut with your foot as you looked at the label. Vodka seltzer it seemed, you shrugged cracking the can open and taking a hesitant first sip. Tastes fine. Fruity and stingy, as all alcohol was but not unpleasant, and definitely not beer. It will have to do, you thought.

JJ watched as you popped open the can and took a sip. He couldn't help but feel a pang of... Concern? Yes, that's what it was. Concern. He knew you rarely drank, and here you were, at a kegger alone with a can of alcohol.

Without thinking twice, he excused himself from his friends, who were still teasing him about you, and pushed through the small crowd of drunk teenagers towards you.

As he approached you, he noticed that you were looking a little overwhelmed, standing alone with the can in your hand, taking small, hesitant sips. He felt a wave of protectiveness wash over him. Despite the rivalry between Pogues and Kooks, he couldn't help but feel the need to make sure you were alright. Not as a pogue talking to a kook but as an acquaintance checking up on a girl alone at a party.

He stopped beside you, giving you a small, casual smile.

"Hey, mouse. You holding up okay?"

When you showed up to the kegger, alone and inevitably too dressed up for the thing you didn't know exactly what you had in mind. Getting black out drunk? Addressing the whole picture in the wallet and sleeping over at your place situation with JJ? You didn't know. The crowd overwhelmed you, and you were slightly uncomfortable from the makeup and the dress.

You turned around at the sound of his voice, your demeanor becoming even more meeker. Great. He actually came up to you. "hi.." you greeted quietly, maybe too quiet given the blaring music around you and the sounds from the teenage crowd floating around both of you. "Yeah 'm holding up.."

JJ leaned closer to you, the loud music in the background making it difficult to hear each other. He could see the unease in your demeanor, the way you fidgeted, the quiet, nervous look in your eyes. It made him feel strangely protective, a feeling he wasn't used to.

He gestured at your drink, attempting a lighthearted tone. "What're you drinking there, mouse? Never pegged you as an alcoholic."

"I'm not sure.." you mumbled, looking down at the can and adjusting your glasses.

JJ chuckled, a hint of amusement in his voice.

"You're not sure? That's dangerous, mouse. You don't know what you're putting in that pretty mouth of yours." The words were out before he could stop them, a little suggestive. He couldn't help it. Especially with the beer he had and the weed he smoked before coming up to you.

'Okay? that was a little suggestive', you thought. You looked down, shifting awkwardly on the sand trying to think of something to say without sounding too flustered or awkward, "it tastes fine.."

JJ watched as you shifted awkwardly, taking another sip from your mystery drink. He smirked, seeing how flustered you were at his little comment.

He took a step closer, his eyes roaming over your face, pausing on your lips, then your eyes, before returning to your lips again. "Yeah? Well, let me taste it."

Before you had the chance to process his words, JJ had already closed the distance between you, taking the can out of your hand and bringing it to his lips, taking a sip. He watched as your eyes widened in surprise, a mixture of shock and shyness.

He handed the can back to you, a cocky smirk on his face. "Mmm... you're right, it does taste fine. What is it, peach seltzer?"

"That's my lip-gloss.." you stated awkwardly, knowing that aside from your drink he had probably tasted your lip gloss stuck on the rim of the can when you took some sips of your own.

JJ's eyebrows raised in surprise, and he let out a soft chuckle at your words. "Your lip-gloss, huh?"

He looked down at your lips, now slightly shiny from the gloss, his gaze lingering. He couldn't help but imagine how it would feel to kiss you right now, tasting the sweet, fruity flavor of the lip gloss on your lips, or the actual drink on your tongue. He cleared his throat. "Well, it tastes better than the drink."

"You should've cleaned the rim.." you suggested awkwardly once again, shifting on your heels, your sneakers digging into the soft sand beneath them.

JJ couldn't help but chuckle again at your comment. You were always so damn cute when you were uncomfortable. He stepped closer, now standing only a few inches away from you. He couldn't resist teasing you a little. "Yeah, guess I should've. But it's a bit late now, isn't it? Guess you'll just have to forgive me."

You looked up at him, shrugging slightly, "it's okay.." you spoke, taking a small step back at the close proximity, despite having slept in the same bed almost a week ago.

He noticed your slight step back, the hint of awkwardness between you both despite the close proximity. He couldn't help but wonder what you were thinking about that night when you had let him stay over at your place.

He smirked, deciding to bring it up, half-joking. "You know, I still haven't thanked you properly for letting me stay over that night."

"You had... you thanked me like 5 times... i think." you answered meekly, "how's your rib?" you pointed vaguely to his side.

He chuckled, amused by your memory of the event. "Mmm, you're right, I did. But maybe I'm due for another 'thank you' tonight."

He lifted his shirt slightly, revealing the now bruised rib (and a sneak peak of his toned abs in the process), the colors of the bruise faded into a pale green. It was almost healed, just a little stiff.

"It's a lot better. Still sore as hell, though."

You nodded knowingly, your eyes studying the fading bruise from behind your glasses, trying not to let your eyes drift to his abs. "Well, I'm glad it wasn't broken.."

He watched as you studied the bruise, your eyes hidden behind the glasses. Despite the casual situation, he felt a strange sense of vulnerability under your gaze. There was something intimate about it, but he quickly brushed it aside. He shrugged, nonchalant as always. "Mhm, me too. I'd have been in for a world of pain if it were. So, don't worry. I'm good as new."

As the silence between you continued, JJ found himself studying your face, the way your glasses framed your eyes, the hint of redness on your cheeks, or the subtle makeup enhancing your soft and pretty features. He suddenly felt the urge to reach out and touch your hair, to see if it was as silky as it looked. But he held back, not wanting to make things even more awkward than they already were.

Instead, he broke the silence, changing the subject. "You know, I still can't believe you're wearing a dress."

You glanced down at the velvety sage green dress flowing gently into the breeze from the ocean, your faded converse dimming down the look of it. You wore dresses, sometimes. When you weren't skating, of course. But this one tonight was Maisy's idea. In your opinion the small pink flowers made it look like a sleeping gown. "it's a bit uncomfortable if I'm being honest.."

JJ raised an eyebrow, taking a moment to appreciate the way the dress hugged your curves and how the soft material swayed with each gentle breeze. You looked absolutely sinful, and he was definitely staring. But in a respectful, neutral kind of way.

"Yeah, it looks a little like a nightdress. Cute, but not really kegger-appropriate." He smirked, a hint of amusement in his eyes.

He took a step closer, the gap between you closing even more. He reached out, gently tugging on the hem of the dress, his fingers grazing your hip.

His voice was low and teasing. "Why'd you dress up so nice for this kegger anyway? Trying to impress someone, mouse?"

"I'm not dressed nicely... it's a summer dress.." you spoke quietly, glancing down at his hand with a subtle questioning look and then back up at his face.

JJ smirked at your quiet response, amused by your denial of the obvious. He tugged on the hem of the dress once more, his fingers still lingering on your hip, the subtle touch sending a shiver down your spine. "Bullshit, mouse. You're practically glowing. You look gorgeous in this. You definitely stand out among the drunk teenagers on this beach."

He tilted his head slightly, locking eyes with you. "So I'm gonna ask you again, why the hell are you wearing a gorgeous, pretty dress at a kegger, hmm?"

His fingers traced a small circle on your hip, the contact causing your heart to race.

"No reason." you shrugged, trying to ignore the fact that he was actually touching you, and questioning you so intensely. What the actual fuck?

JJ raised an eyebrow at your nonchalant response, his fingers still tracing small circles on your hip, his touch light yet electrifying.

He leaned in a little closer, his voice lowering to a huskier tone. "Bullshit again. You don't dress up like this for no reason, mouse. You don't come to a kegger all dolled up for no reason."

"Why do i gotta have a reason?" you asked gently, narrowing your eyes in mild and shy curiosity.

JJ chuckled softly at your question, the innocent curiosity in your eyes endearing to him.

"Because people usually have reasons for doing things, mouse. You don't just dress up and go to a party that's usually full of stoners and drunk people in board shorts and bikinis for fun."

He took another step closer, his chest now almost touching yours. He smirked, his eyes roaming over your body again.

You could tell he was drunk and high, that much was obvious. Maybe that's why he was prying and being so touchy—and the dress was a step up from your usual clothing. Men were really simple creatures it seemed. "I just wanted a small change... besides.. it's a nice summer dress. Perfect for a kegger on the beach.... in the midst of summer." you spoke quietly, your fingers reaching up to adjust your glasses.

JJ chuckled again at your response, appreciating your quiet honesty. He knew damn well that you were still avoiding the truth, but he didn't push it. Not yet, anyway.

He leaned in even closer, his breath hot against your ear. "It is a nice summer dress, I'll give you that... but I think it would look even better on my floor tonight."

Before you could stammer out a flustered response to his obvious and shameless flirting, you were interrupted by a small cough. Your head snapped to the side at the sound, eyes falling onto the source of the voice.

You knew Ben from Maisy. He was one of the few acquaintances you actually didn't mind. You turned to face the boy, giving him a small, polite smile and adjusting your glasses. "Hi, Ben..." you greeted hesitantly, a touch of confusion coloring your tone. It was unusual for him to approach you, especially when Maisy wasn't with you.

JJ groaned internally at the interruption, annoyed that his moment of closeness with you had been cut off by some random guy approaching you. He was waiting for your reply intently. He recognized Ben as one of Maisy's friends and instantly disliked him on principle. He took a step back, his face hardening as he crossed his arms over his chest, watching you interact with the other boy closely.

Ben, on the other hand, was giving JJ a friendly smile, totally oblivious to the underlying tension between the two of you. He was a typical Kook, charming, athletic, sociable, and completely unaware of the world outside his little rich bubble.

He returned your smile, giving you a nod in greeting. "Hey Y/n, I thought that was you! You look great tonight."

"Aw thanks..." you shifted awkwardly at his compliment. You knew Ben from the countless band practices you went to with Maisy when she was hooking up with their guitarist. Ben was on the drums and pretty nice too. Never 'come up to you at a kegger and compliment you' nice, though. Weird.

Ben chuckled, clearly enjoying the shy, flustered look on your face. JJ scowled, silently hating the way this guy was making you blush.

Ben glanced at JJ over your shoulder, noticing the pogue's stern expression. He gave JJ a small nod, acknowledging his presence before returning his attention to you. "You here on your own?"

"Yeah.. um.. Maisy's out of town unfortunately." you stammered nodding.

Ben nodded understandingly, a hint of disappointment on his face. "Ah, that's a shame. I've been meaning to hang out with her more. She's been so busy lately.."

JJ rolled his eyes, wishing these two dorks would hurry up with the small talk so he could have you to himself again.

"Well... it would be awkward since her and Riley broke up. But hey, you can convince him to have us over at another band practice.." you chuckled awkwardly, shaking your head.

Ben let out a laugh, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly. "Yeah, it has been kind of weird between them... but I guess that's just how it is when you date a bandmate and it doesn't work out."

JJ was starting to lose patience. He was tired of watching you and Ben chat about irrelevant band drama. He decided to intervene, taking a step forward and placing a possessive hand on your hip.

"Hey Ben, sorry to cut this chat short, but I need to talk to mouse alone for a sec." He looked at Ben coldly, almost daring him to object.

Ben looked surprised, clearly not expecting JJ to interject like that. He looked between you and JJ, his friendly expression faltering a bit at JJ's possessive hand on your hip and the way he called you "mouse". "Oh, uh... sure, man. I don't mind."

JJ smirked, satisfied that Ben had taken the hint and backed off. He pulled you a few steps away from Ben, his hand still firmly on your hip.

He leaned down, his lips brushing against your ear as he spoke, glancing over his shoulder at the retreating form of Ben. "That guy's a total dork, mouse."

"Ben's my friend." you mumbled in confusion side glancing up at him in quiet confusion. "Well, sort of.."

JJ chuckled, the alcohol and weed making his irritation and possessive streak even stronger than usual. "Yeah, yeah... I get that. He's one of Maisy's friends. But he's still a total dork. Do you think he's cute?"

"I dunno... -why does it matter?" you asked, your brows furrowing gently.

JJ shrugged, his grip on your hip tightening slightly. "No reason. I'm just asking." He leaned in closer, his lips practically touching your ear as he spoke again in a low, almost possessive tone.

"You wanna know what I think?"

He didn't wait for you to reply, continuing on "I think that he was all over you tonight. The whole 'you look gorgeous' comment, the 'i've been meaning to hang out with Maisy' line.... what a load of bullshit."

"No he wasn't.. Ben's always nice." You mumbled, grimacing slightly. What was in the air tonight, and why is JJ acting like... whatever he's acting like right now.

JJ rolled his eyes at your naiveté. "Mouse, if you think that dork was just being nice, then you're even more clueless than I thought." He pulled you closer, his hand now on your lower back, almost hugging you against him

He continued speaking, his voice low and rough, his head tilted down close to yours. "He was hitting on you, mouse. That whole 'you look great tonight' and 'I've been wanting to hang out with Maisy more' crap was just an excuse to make himself look good."

"But... why are you so worked up?" you voiced your curiosity without meaning to. You just kept switching between different levels of disbelief, each one more intense than the other. Especially since he was being so touchy-feely.

JJ felt his irritation and possessiveness flare up even more at your question. Why was he so worked up, you ask? "Because I don't like seeing some dickhead kooked up dork drooling over you. It pisses me off."

He tightened his grip on your waist, his fingers digging into your skin as he pulled you even closer, a bit over the boundary he respected usually.

He leaned in even closer, his lips hovering over your neck, his breath hot against your skin as he spoke. "You're supposed to be hanging out with me tonight, mouse. Not some lame ass Kook with a dumbass haircut and a drum set."

Your brows furrowed, growing more shocked at his actions. What the fuck was happening, like actually? "ah.. okay?" you mustered out. You weren't sure what to do with your hands or how to feel given he was practically clinging to you in the middle of the beach.

JJ smirked at your flustered, shocked reaction. He was enjoying the way he was making you squirm in his hands. He pressed himself against you even more, his chest now fully pressed against yours, his chin resting on your shoulder. He inhaled the scent of your hair, all too familiar with the smell of your shampoo since that night, his fingers tracing small circles on your lower back just above your hips.

He spoke in a low, huskier tone, his lips grazing your ear.

"You smell good, mouse. You look good too. In this goddamn pretty dress and those stupid high tops you always wear... you look so damn pretty tonight."

"What's happening?" you asked, your hands resting on his shoulders hesitantly.

JJ chuckled, amused by your bewildered expression. He liked that he could fluster you so easily. He liked having you close like this, in his arms, all dressed up in a pretty little summer dress.

He pulled you even closer, his hands now fully on your hips, his fingers digging into your skin. "What do you mean 'what's happening'? I'm touching you, mouse. You know... cause I want to."

He leaned down, his lips brushing against your neck. He didn't kiss your neck, though he wanted to, just teased you a bit, enjoying the way your hands clenched around his shoulders in response to his touch. "You like this, don't you? Being close to me... being touched, pretty little mouse?"

"I'm just a little confused that's all..?" you spoke, trying to keep your voice steady, even though you were freaking out inside, close to an asthma attack.

JJ chuckled again, his hands still on your hips, his fingers slowly tracing small circles on your skin through the fabric of the dress.

"What's so confusing, sweet mouse?" He nipped at your earlobe teasingly, then licked a spot on your neck just below it.

He smirked against your skin as he spoke again, his voice rough and full of desire. "You taste good, mouse. You think I should taste you somewhere else, just to see if you taste as good there too? Just to make sure."

Okay something definitely was in the the air tonight. Cause what? did he actually just ask you that? You blinked a couple of times in confusion and flusteredness, your brows furrowing, "what exactly are we talking about?" you asked meekly.

JJ chuckled huskily, loving how you kept letting him fluster you. He leaned back a bit so he could look into your face, his eyes roaming over your flushed cheeks and wide eyes.

He raised an eyebrow, his voice dropping an octave as one of his hands slowly travelled down to the hem of your dress, grazing over the bare skin of your thigh, and making the fabric ride up on your leg just a little bit.

His hand on your hip stayed in place, his fingers tracing lazy patterns on your skin, while the one on your thighs traced higher, slowly pushing up the hem of your dress, causing it to expose more and more of your skin to him as it went.

He leaned in close to your ear, his lips just barely touching your skin as he spoke, his words laced with a hint of desire. "You want me to show you what I mean, pretty little mouse?"

"I think i know.." you mumbled breathlessly, a small nervous smile tugging at your lips as his hand slid under the fabric of your slip dress. This genuinely felt unreal. The same guy who didn't bother sparing a glance in your direction before you got stuck in a closet like a month ago, was... well groping you shamelessly? in the middle of a kegger nonetheless. Same guy who you've been in love with since you were 9. Crazy. Your brain and breathing had trouble keeping up.

JJ chuckled, loving the breathless sound of your voice as he teased his hand farther up your thigh, his fingers tracing the edge of your underwear. He loved the way you looked right now, wearing that cute little dress and your favorite sneakers, with a flushed, flustered expression on your face.

He nibbled on your earlobe again, his breath hot against your skin as he spoke. "Oh yeah? You gonna tell me what you think then, pretty girl?"

His hands continued to roam over your body, one on your hip, the other under your dress. He shifted, pressing his body against yours even more, his chest flush against yours. His breath was now coming in warm, ragged pants, his eyes darkened with desire as he leaned down and started leaving a trail of soft kisses along your neck and shoulder.

"All i know is that.. well... we're still on the beach? I dunno what's happening but.. seems like something that shouldn't be for the public." Yeah no shit dumbass. Whatever he's suggesting is, in fact not public worthy. This is still shocking. His hand was actually under your dress, his face buried in your neck. While you stood there like a scarecrow, unmoving.

JJ chuckled, his breath tickling your neck. He looked up and around at the people dancing and partying around them, realizing you were right. "Yeah... guess you're right about that one, mouse. Wouldn't want anyone to get a show they didn't ask for, huh?"

He smirked, pulling away from your neck, his hand slipping out from under your dress with some reluctance.

He took a step back, putting some space between you. He looked down at you, his eyes roaming over your flushed face and outfit. You looked so damn pretty, and it was driving him nuts. "C'mon, sweet mouse. Let's go somewhere a little more private."

At that point who were you to protest. The guy you've been in love with secretly was basically dragging you away to well... fuck? And that was more than enough instead of some sort of awkward conversation. And it wasn't like you didn't want to. Or thought about it before. You'd be a liar if you said you didn't.

The walk to the chateau from the beach was hurried and frankly too quiet for your liking. Surprisingly. But given you were a bit tipsy, you didn't mind escaping the crowd to be alone with JJ. Especially he seemed more than eager. He was the reason you came to the thing in the first place anyway.

JJ pulled you through the throngs of drunk teenagers and away from the beach, his hand still gripping yours as he navigated the dark streets. He led you towards the Chateau, knowing they could get some privacy there. He wasn’t sure what was going on at this point, but he was too intoxicated and aroused to question it too much. Initially JJ was gonna stay a good distance from you when he first noticed you at the kegger. Wave and shoot you a friendly smile, careful not to push the boundary too much like he did a week ago. But who was he trying to fool here, he was still carrying that picture of you and he found himself checking it when he had the time to throughout the days.

When they reached the house, he led you inside, pulling you into a dark room and closing the door behind them.

He pushed you lightly against the wall, his hands on your hips, trapping you between him and the wall. He looked into your face, his eyes roaming over your flushed face, your messy hair, your pretty little dress.

He spoke in a gruff, huskier voice, his eyes dark with desire. "This better, mouse? You like being alone with me like this?"

He leaned down, his lips brushing against your neck again as he spoke, his hands slowly moving up your sides, slipping under your dress. "You look so pretty in this dress. Such a pretty little thing... all dressed up for me, huh?"

You found your self humming and nodding without realizing, basically melting in his hands as he continued to compliment and touch you shamelessly, completely in disbelief at the situation.

JJ smirked against your skin, loving the way you were practically melting in his hands, responding to his touch so eagerly. He continued to whisper praises against your neck, his lips nipping at the sensitive skin there, his hands roaming under your dress, slowly sliding up your thigh.

"You like being alone with me like this, don't you, sweet mouse? All alone, in a dark room, with me touching you like this?"

He continued to kiss and nip at your neck, his lips and tongue leaving a trail of wet kisses along your skin, moving down towards your collarbone. He pushed the strap of your dress off your shoulder easily, giving himself more access to your skin.

His hands continued to move along your thighs, pushing up the hem of your dress as they went. "You feel so damn good, mouse. So soft and pretty and warm..."

Your hands reached up instinctively, raking through the hair at his nape gently, small quiet sighs escaping your parted lips as you writhed against the wall next to the door. He sounded heavenly, complimenting you and touching you like he couldn't get enough of it.

JJ let out a soft moan as your fingers raked through his hair, the sensation sending shivers down his spine. He pressed himself closer to you, his body pinning you against the wall, trapping you there as he continued to shower your neck and collarbone with kisses and bites. JJ found himself more and more satisfied as writhed and sighed softly, reveling in the way you sounded in the quiet room.

He moved one of his knee between your legs, causing your dress to ride up even more, exposing your inner thigh to him.

He nipped at a sensitive spot on your neck, his teeth gently scraping against the skin, before he spoke in a low, huskier voice, his words coming out as a gruff whisper against your skin.

"You like this, mouse? Like having me pinning you against the wall like this? Having me touching you like this, running my hands all over your skin, just how I've been thinking about?"

Your breathing was ragged your hands still tugging at his hair gently, taking a few moments to catch your breath before speaking, "i.. genuinely didn't expect this to happen." you chuckled breathlessly.

JJ let out another soft moan, loving the way you tugged at his hair. He continued to kiss and bite your neck and collarbone, marking your skin with hickies and pink bite marks as he spoke, his voice gruff and full of desire. "Me neither, mouse. But I'm sure as hell enjoying it though..."

He slid his hands up higher, pulling up your dress, exposing even more of your bare skin to him. He trailed kisses along your bare shoulder, then started to lick and bite his way back up to your neck, his tongue and teeth leaving a trail of bite marks along your skin.

He pushed his knee up against you, pressing his thigh between your legs, letting you feel how hard he was for you already. Which shocked him too, you didn't even kiss him directly and he already was worked up.

At the small pressure between your legs you let out a small almost imperceptible moan, writhing against him and the wall. You didn't know what was more shocking, the fact that he was hard and pressed against you, or the fact that you were doing this in the first place.

JJ felt a small smirk tug at the corners of his lips as he heard the tiny moan that escaped your mouth. He loved the sounds you were making. He loved hearing you talk, and laugh softly at times when he made a dumb joke while making small talk with you out and about.

But JJ realized that he loved the way you were pressed against him, writhing and pushing against his knee as he pinned you to the wall, causing sweet shy moans to escape your lips more than anything.

He nipped at your ear lobe, then whispered gruffly into your ear, his words full of desire and need. "Hear that, mouse? You like having me rubbing against you like this, don't you? You like feeling how hard I am for you?"

He continued to whisper into your ear, his voice rough and full of need and desire as he spoke, his hands grasping at the soft flesh of your hips and thighs, pulling you closer to him.

"Can you feel how hard you're making me, mouse? How much I want you, pretty little mouse?"

You nodded, although he probably couldn't see it, another small strained sound leaving your lips. One of your hands reached up to adjust your glasses, your body feeling like it was on fire, both from his words and actions. The thought that, this was nothing out of the ordinary for him while you were experiencing these things for the first time tugged at your brain, but you were too aroused to care. You might try and talk to him about it after. If you could. For now your hands moved to cup his face gently, cradling his jaw as his thigh continued to press between your legs, causing small jolts of pleasure shoot through your body.

JJ felt his breath catch in his throat as you gently cupped his face, your thumb brushing against his cheek. It was a strangely tender gesture, and it sent a pang of something unreadable through him. Something that had nothing to do with the hard-on pressing insistently on your inner thigh.

He looked into your face, his eyes locking onto yours. Your eyes were wide and full of need and desire, your face flushed and hair messy. He loved the way you looked right now, all flustered and excited because of him.

He leaned his head down, resting his forehead against yours as he spoke in a gruff, husky voice.

"You drive me crazy, pretty little mouse. You know that, don't you? You drive me crazy with those big eyes of yours starin' at me through your glasses, and that innocent, sweet little mouth of yours."

He nipped at your bottom lip, his teeth raking against it before he pulled back to speak again, his voice huskier than before. "How you feel against me like this... it's like you were made for me."

He leaned down again, his lips brushing against your skin, planting soft, gentle kisses along your jaw and neck, continuing to whisper gruffly into your ear. "You're so damn sweet, mouse. So soft and pretty. Makes me want to keep you all to myself."

His hands continued to roam, his fingers tracing your thighs and hips, pulling you closer to him as his thigh pressed between your legs, continuing to cause those jolts of pleasure to shoot through your body. "Maybe i just might.." he added quietly, more to himself than for you.

At the moment you wanted to speak, say some things of yourself but you couldn't. It was like when you got all shy and clammed up flustered, only 10 times worse, or better. He looked even prettier than usual, his hair messy and his face buried into the crook of your neck, the kisses he pressed there gently making you even more aroused. Who would've thought you liked neck kisses? The way his hands were roaming under your soft thin dress was shameless, groping and bunching up the fabric was driving you mad, making you dizzy and like you were in a dream. Maisy would die when hearing about this.

JJ continued to kiss and bite at your neck and collarbone, his teeth and lips nipping at the sensitive skin there. He loved the sounds you were making, the small gasps and moans you couldn't hold back as he touched you, his hands roaming across your thighs and hips. He felt like he could worship your body like this forever, just touching you and kissing you and marking you as his.

He pulled back for a moment, his eyes roaming over your flushed face and messy hair, his voice gruff and full of need.

"You have any idea how pretty you are, mouse? How pretty you look right now, all flushed and messed up like this? It's like you were made for me, all soft and warm and mine..."

He leaned down, his mouth attacking the other side of your neck again, his lips and tongue leaving more kisses and bite marks along your plush skin, his hands continuing to touch and grope at your thighs and body without any actual care for any boundary that might have existed previously. He had enough of those.

Your hands switched between cradling his face and running through his hair, the softness of it making your head even fuzzier. He smelled like cologne and weed mixed with sunscreen and your brain didn't know what to focus on. The feeling of his thigh between your slightly shaky legs? his lips all over your neck and collarbone or the way his hands roamed all over your skin under your dress? You were overwhelmed, in a good way, soft moans escaping your lips without meaning to, slightly shocked that you could make such sounds.

JJ felt his heart thudding in his chest as he heard the soft moans you were making, the sounds making him harder than he ever thought possible. He loved the feel of your fingers in his hair, the way your hands clung to him like you never wanted him to stop touching you.

He pulled back slightly, his lips and teeth leaving your neck with a quiet gasp, his breath ragged as he spoke in a gruff, huskier voice. "God, you sound so damn good, mouse..."

He pulled your hips closer to him, his hands grasping at your body, bunching up the fabric of your dress as he pressed his hard body against you. He could feel you against him, soft and warm and needy, and it was driving him insane. He leaned down, his lips ghosting over your ear as he spoke in a low whisper. "You feel that, pretty mouse? You feel how hard you're making me? I want you so damn bad, I can hardly stand it."

One of your hands trailed down his chest, your touch small and almost shy despite the situation you were in, your fingers brushing against his belt and the skin above it, under his shirt, your eyes darting across his face in the low light of the room.

JJ felt a jolt go through his body as your small, warm hand touched his bare skin, your fingers trailing down his chest and towards his belt. He let out a soft hiss through his teeth, his body reacting to your touch like it was electric.

He couldn't believe how soft and gentle you were being, given the circumstances. It was a sharp contrast to his own rough, demanding touch, and it made his heart thump in his chest. "Careful, mouse," he breathed, his voice huskier than before.

He looked down at you, his eyes dark and full of desire, his hands still clutching at your hips, holding you tight against him. He could feel the heat radiating off your body, the soft, small press of your hip against his, and it was almost too much for him to bear.

"You keep touching me like that, and I'm going to start thinking that you want me," he said, his voice ragged and full of need.

You let out a small breathless chuckle at his words, your hand stilling its movements, your brows furrowed in amusement that was probably overshadowed by your arousal and flusteredness. As if that wasn't obvious.

JJ's eyes darkened even further as he heard your breathless chuckle, his body tensing as he looked down at you, his gaze intense and hungry. He loved the sound of your laugh, even in this situation, and he wanted to hear it again and again and again. Like a song he likes to overplay.

He pulled you even closer to him, his body pressed firmly against yours, his hands still grasping at your hips.

"You think this is funny, mouse? You think it's funny how much I want you right now? How much I need you?"

You shook your head, a small grin tugging at your lips as your eyes stayed locked on his. You were chuckling nervously if anything, your arms wrapping around his neck loosely and gingerly as he pulled you closer, his face inching closer as he pressed you against the wall and between him self.

JJ couldn't take his eyes off yours, your small grin and the way you gingerly wrapped your arms around his neck sending a thrill through his body. He could feel your breath against his skin, the small, shy way you moved, the way you were letting him hold you like this, holding you against the wall like he couldn't bear to let you go.

He leaned in closer, his face inches away from yours, voicing out his curiosity which was mixed with an overwhelming amount of lust.

"Where were you this whole time?"

He was so close to you now, his body pressed flush against yours, his lips mere inches away from your own. He could smell the scent of your skin, a mix of sweetness and musk that was driving him wild. His hands slowly slid down the side of your body, tracing the curves of your waist and hips, his fingers gently caressing the soft fabric of your dress.

"You know what I want, mouse...?" he whispered, his voice husky and full of need. "What I need from you?"

You shook your head, your eyes locking into his as he leaned even close, your breaths mingling and his lips ghosting over yours as he spoke. You were tempted to close the distance for a moment. Before realizing that you didn't even know how to kiss.

JJ's breath hitched as he saw your eyes lock onto his, your breaths mingling with his, so close together that he could feel the heat radiating off your body, and hear the unevenness of your breathing.

He couldn't think straight anymore, his mind full of only one thing, one person, you. He could feel the desire growing within him, the need to be even closer to you, to touch and caress and taste you. Anything you'd let him do.

"Say please," he whispered, his voice a rugged husk against your skin. "I want you to say please to me.."

"Please?" you questioned meekly, finally speaking up after god knows how long of just gasping and moaning softly, your voice wavered and shaky.

JJ let out a small groan as he heard your soft, meek voice say "please," the word ringing in his ears. It was the first time he'd heard you speak in what felt like hours, and he loved the sound of it, your voice soft and wavering.

He could feel his body react to you, the need within him growing even more intense, his heart pounding in his chest. He leaned in even closer, his breath ghosting over your lips as he spoke again, his demand hurried and strained.

"Say it again."

"Please.." you pleaded quietly, questioning tone leaving your shaky voice. You weren't sure what for, your brain too focused on how close his lips were to yours.

JJ felt a jolt of desire run through him as you said "please" again, your soft, shaky voice making him even more desperate for you. He loved the way your body felt pressed against him, the heat between you, the way your voices sounded so close together, how you both sounded out of breath.

"Good girl," he murmured, his breath ghosting over your lips, so close he could kiss you, but he held himself back, wanting to hear you say it one more time.

"Again."

"Are you gonna kiss me?" you wondered out loud, your brows raised. Your body thrummed at the small praise and it was like something in you was unearthed. Praise was something your fuzzy brain liked apparently because you could feel your self grow more aroused. It was a shocking revelation.

JJ felt his heart thump in his chest as he heard your question, your brow raised and a hint of need in your tone.

He could see a new spark in your eyes, as if something had been awakened inside of you, like you were craving his touch, his attention, his praise. And he was more than happy to praise you if it meant he got to do this with you.

"Is that what you want, pretty little mouse? For me to kiss you?" he breathed, his lips hovering millimeters away from yours, taunting you with the closeness.

"I don't know how.." you whispered, your voice wavering gently, your arms still wrapped around his neck for support. You played with the hair at the back of his neck, more out of nervousness than trying to be touchy feely.

JJ felt a wave of tenderness go through him as he heard your soft, wavering voice, his heart swelling in his chest. He hadn't expected you to say that, to admit that you didn't know how to kiss.

His desire for you was still strong, burning in his chest like a flame, but he also felt a sudden urge to be gentle, to go slow and show you how.

"It's okay, mouse. You don't need to know anything," he murmured, his hand brushing against the side of your face.

"Just let me take care of you," he continued, his voice a soft, gruff whisper as he drew even closer, his body pressed against yours, his lips now so close that you could feel his breath against yours.

"It's okay, pretty mouse. Just close your eyes, and let me show you how it's done."

"Don't you find it weird?" you asked meekly even though you knew you were supposed to be silent and not ask irrelevant questions anymore, furrowing your brows and shifting your face gently.

JJ shook his head, his eyes never leaving yours as he spoke softly, his hand still resting against the side of your face, his thumb tracing a gentle path across your skin.

"No, mouse. I don't find it weird. I find it...endearing, actually. The idea that I'll be your first kiss...I've never really thought about a girl not kissing anyone before..."

"But I can't say I'm complaining. I like the idea of being the one to teach you what it's like."

His fingers traced a soft path down your jawline, his touch gentle and unhurried. "Just close your eyes for me, pretty mouse. Trust me, you'll love it."

You let your eyes flutter closed despite how nervous you were. I mean who would've thought that you would actually end up having your first kiss with the boy you liked since, forever basically. Maybe you were a little lucky after all. You tilted your head to the right side, parting your lips in anticipation.

As your eyes fluttered closed, JJ felt a rush of tenderness go through him, almost overwhelmed by how beautiful and innocent you looked in that moment.

He gently brought his thumb to your chin, tilting your head back slightly, his eyes tracing over your face in the low light, taking in every detail.

"Relax, pretty girl," he murmured, his voice impossibly soft, his breath warm against your cheeks. "I've got you."

Then he leaned down, his lips gently pressing against yours.

JJ's heart raced in his chest as he finally kissed you after thinking about it all night and these past weeks. His mouth moved gently against yours, hesitant and tender. He was careful, slow, almost a little unsure, but he wanted you to feel as comfortable as possible, and he knew that your inexperience made this moment all the more special.

He didn't quite know what he had been expecting, but feeling your soft, sweet lips against his was something he hadn't been prepared for, especially since he could taste the peach lip-gloss faintly just like he'd wanted. It was a completely different experience, and he found himself enjoying it more than he ever thought himself capable of.

One of your hands slid to cup the side of his face gently as he kissed you, the feeling so unlike anything you felt but not unpleasant. It was soft and hesitant, a stark contrast from how he was kissing your neck just a few moments ago, and you found your self kissing him back surprisingly with little to no hesitation. Obviously. You'd imagined this countless times before. When watching him in the school halls, laughing with his friends loudly. Or when he'd finish surfing, coming out of the water all sun-kissed and whooping happily.

But none of those day dreams compared to the real thing. To the way you felt while experiencing it and the way he was reacting to the kiss. You didn't take those details in account when daydreaming. You weren't prepared by how gentle he was being or how soft his lips were against your own, his hand sliding down to tangle in the hair on the back of your head, just resting there.

As you responded to his kiss, cupping the side of his face with your small, gentle hand, JJ felt a wave of heat and affection wash over him, surprised and pleased by your willingness to respond. He was used to rough, roughhousing and quick, heated moments with girls he didn't care about, but this was so different, so new and special and tender.

He let out a soft sound against your lips as you kissed him back, his hands sliding down to your waist, pulling you impossibly closer to him.

You leaned in as his hands pulled you closer, your back lifting off the wall a little as you kissed him, both of your hands cupping his face now, smiling against his lips at the small sound that left his lips, slightly muffled by your own. God, he sounded even better than you could imagine.

JJ felt his heart thump again in his chest as you leaned into him, your hands gently holding his face, your bodies pressed closer together. The feeling of your lips against his, the way you responded to him, and the small, sweet smile on your face, sent a wave of warmth through him that he didn't quite know what to do with.

He brought one hand to the back of your head once again, his fingers tangling in your hair, gently angling your head so he could kiss you more deeply this time.

He deepened the kiss, his lips moving against yours with more fervor now that you seemed to get the hang of it, his body pressing closer to you, his other hand shifting until it rested on the small of your back, pulling you even closer to him.

He let out a soft, almost needy sound, his tongue gently tracing the outline of your bottom lip, as if silently asking for permission to go further.

Your lips parted hesitantly, a sound similar to his leaving your lips too, your hands cradling his jaw tugging him a little closer to deepen the kiss yourself.

When your lips parted, JJ felt a jolt of desire go through him, your sound like music to his ears. He took that as permission, and his tongue gently dipped into your mouth, exploring and caressing gently, tasting you with a hunger that surprised even him.

He pulled you even closer, his body flush against yours, his hand in your hair, his other splayed on your lower back, holding you tight against him, never wanting to let go.

The kiss was hot and sweet, JJ's tongue dancing with yours, the taste of you igniting a fire in him that he hadn't expected, the combination of vodka seltzer and peach lip-gloss almost making his knees buckle right then and there. He could feel the heat between you growing, the way your body seemed to fit perfectly against his, as if you were made to be this close, to be in his embrace.

He wanted more, so much more, but he forced himself to hold back, knowing that this was your first kiss, and he didn't want to overwhelm you.

Your fingers clutched at his jaw, instinctively trying bring him more close than he already was, your tongue moving against his a little shyly but eager. For your first kiss it was going great, even better than great actually.

JJ's heart skipped a beat as he felt your fingers clutching at his jaw almost desperately, pulling him even closer, your tongue responding shyly but eagerly against his. He was both surprised and flattered, and the feeling of you wanting more, wanting him, was almost overwhelming.

He felt his body respond to you, his desire for you growing by the second, but he forced himself to reign it in, reminding himself that he needed to take things slow, to be careful with you.

He broke the kiss momentarily, pulling away just enough to catch his breath, his eyes locked on yours.

Your brows raised, your eyes fluttering open and taking a deep breath in pressing your lips together, "that-.. that was great, right?" you asked quietly, one of your hands reaching to adjust your glasses nervously.

JJ couldn't help but smile as you spoke up after the kiss, your voice so soft and shy, your glasses now slightly askew on your face. The way you looked so innocent and unsure, it was endearing, and he found himself feeling even more protective of you.

He brought a hand up to gently push your hair out of your face, his fingers brushing your cheek tenderly as he adjusted your glasses too.

"Yeah, mouse...it was great," he said softly. "You're a natural."

Your lips stretched into a shy grin, your eyes locked onto his lips in awe. They were smudged by your lip gloss and slightly swollen and the sight made you almost dizzy, "yeah..?" you questioned breathlessly.

JJ couldn't help but notice your gaze lingering on his lips, the way you looked at him in awe, and he felt his heart thump in his chest once more. He'd never had a girl look at him quite like that before, like he was something precious, something rare.

He gently ran his thumb over your bottom lip, wiping away the bit of smudged lip gloss. Then he smiled, his eyes never leaving yours as he spoke. "Yeah, pretty mouse. You were amazing."

He leaned in again, gently pressing another soft kiss on your lips, tasting the sweet sweetness of your lip gloss. He couldn't get enough of you, the way you responded to him, the way you looked at him, it was all driving him a little crazy.

He reluctantly pulled away, resting his forehead against yours, letting out a soft exhale.

"You've been holding out on me, mouse," he murmured, his hand still gently against your face, his thumb caressing your cheek.

You were a little disappointed the kiss ended quickly but you were sightly confused by his statement, "what'dya mean?" you asked gently.

JJ chuckled softly at your question, his eyes fixed on yours as he spoke, his thumb still tracing a gentle path on your cheek.

"You're a damn natural at this," he said, his voice a little huskier than before, his lips still barely a breath away from yours. "Never would have thought that was your first kiss..."

"Maybe i just like you.." you chuckled, your grin widening a little at your sudden boldness.

JJ felt his heart thump in his chest as you spoke, the smile on your face making his stomach flutter. The idea that you liked him, that this might not just be a one-time thing, was enough to send a rush of emotions through him.

He pulled you closer to him again, his arms wrapping around your waist, holding you tight against him.

"Yeah? You like me, mouse?" he murmured, his mouth hovering just above yours again.

"Yeah.. do you?" you asked still grinning, silently hoping he wouldn't brush off the question and reject you. You didn't know what came over you saying that.

JJ's heart skipped a beat as you asked your question, his arms tightening around you involuntarily, as if the thought of rejecting you was physically painful. In reality, it was.

He'd never felt this way about a girl before, and the idea that you actually liked him, that you might want him as much as he wanted you, was both exciting and terrifying at the same time.

"Yeah, mouse...I like you," he said quietly, his voice gruff, almost vulnerable. How couldn't he?

He leaned in again, capturing your lips in a soft, lingering kiss, his arms holding you tight against him. There was a sense of possessiveness to the way he held you, like he never wanted to let you go.

When he finally broke the kiss, he couldn't help but smile at the look on your face, the way you were looking at him with those big, beautiful eyes of yours. He gently took your chin in his hand, tilting your head back so you were looking up at him.

"But I have to know something,"

"What?" you asked, dazed by his confession and the kiss that followed, not even registering what he said for a moment.

JJ's heart thumped in his chest as he saw how dazed and disoriented you looked, the sight sending a wave of a mixture of affection and satisfaction through him.

He waited until your eyes focused on his, your head still tilted back in his grasp, before he spoke, his voice low and filled with a hint of possessiveness. "You're mine now, right, mouse? You're my girl?"

'Helloooo.. I thought you'd never ask.' you screamed internally. Your brain stopped for a moment and it probably mirrored on your flushed face, "yeah.. no, yeah.." you replied meekly, shock probably evident on your face, even in the dim light of the room you were in.

A hint of a smirk tugged at the corners of JJ's lips as he watched your reaction to his question, the way your brain seemed to short-circuit for a moment, the shock and disbelief on your face. It was honestly adorable, and he couldn't help but feel a sense of satisfaction.

He chuckled softly, his hand still on your chin, his thumb gently caressing your skin. "You don't sound too sure, mouse...you're not trying to back out already, are you?"

"No. Sorry-.. i was just like shocked for a second there... as if that wasn't obvious, i probably looked like a dumbass. But I'm not unsure, god knows.." you rambled, answering his question and it was like your meek nature dropped for a second as you rambled nervously.

JJ chuckled again, watching as your usually shy and quiet demeanor dropped for a second as you rambled nervously. He'd never seen you this talkative before, and he found it strangely endearing, the way you got so flustered and flustered around him.

He kept his hand lightly under your chin, tilting your head back so your eyes stayed on his as he spoke, his voice a gentle but firm.

"Hey, hey, mouse, calm down," he said softly. "No need to ramble like that. I asked a simple question, and I want a simple answer, that's all."

"Yes... god, fuck-.. no. I'm not backing out." you stuttered, locking eyes with him.

JJ felt a wave of warmth and affection go through him as you finally managed to give him a direct answer, your voice a little flustered and your eyes fixed on his. The way you looked at him, so shy and cute but so sure of yourself at the same time, it was a strange mix of endearing and attractive.

He couldn't help but smile, a hint of possessive satisfaction in his gaze as he spoke.

"That's my girl.. my pretty mouse.."

He didn't wait for a response, instead he captured your lips in a soft but firm kiss, his touch was protective, possessive, and despite the gentleness of his kiss, there was a hint of desperate need in the way he held you against him.

You smiled against the kiss once again, your hands cupping his jaw once again, kissing him back almost instantly, still pressed against the wall and you found your self wondering how his legs didn't give out, because yours would've by now if he wasn't holding you up against the wall like that.

JJ's legs were starting to ache a little from holding you up against the wall, but he didn't care. The way you were kissing him, how your small hands were holding his jaw, how your body fit perfectly against his, he wouldn't let you go even if his legs gave out completely. It was worth it.

His hand on your back gripped a little tighter, pulling you even closer to him, his kisses growing more insistent, more urgent, his tongue gently slipping into your mouth.

The taste of you was addictive, and JJ found himself wanting more, needing more, his mouth moving against yours hungrily as he deepened the kiss, loosing some sense of gentleness. His hand in your hair gently pulled, tilting your head back a little, giving him better access to your neck, his lips and teeth nipping and biting at your skin, exploring the sensitive flesh of your throat.

"So.. this isn't just a one time thing right?" you asked hesitantly, tilting your head back gently, your words punctuated by a small breathless moan.

JJ paused for a moment, feeling your head tilt back against his hand, the sound of your breathless moan sending a jolt of electricity through him. For a moment, he just held you there, his mouth still on your neck, his hand still gripping your hair.

He lifted his head after a moment, his breath hot against your skin, his answer a low, gruff murmur against your ear. "Absolutely not, mouse. You think I'd let you go after one kiss? No way in hell..."

"Ah, okay... good.." your eyes met his in the dim light nodding, "that's good—cause i like you a lot.." you mumbled almost desperately leaning in to ghost your lips over his and then kiss him briefly.

JJ's heart thumped in his chest as you spoke, hearing the desperation in your voice, seeing the need in your eyes. It was such a stark contrast to your usual shy and reserved demeanor, but he found himself loving it. He found himself loving seeing you open up like this, loving the fact you wanted him, just as much as he wanted you.

He caught your lips in a brief, soft kiss, before pulling back just enough to speak, his voice hoarse with desire. "Yeah? How much do you like me, mouse?"

"So much.." you almost whined out, your brows scrunching up slightly. You were gaining confidence rapidly and you weren't sure if it was a bad thing or a good one.

JJ's grip on you tightened slightly as you practically whined out your answer, your voice so soft and needy, it was almost enough to make him lose his mind. Seeing you like this, hearing you like this, it was a side of you he'd never seen before, and God, he loved it.

A small, satisfied smile tugged at his lips as he looked down at you, his hand in your hair gripping just a little tighter. He leaned down, his mouth right next to your ear, his breath hot against your skin. "Show me."

You didn't need more encouragement, leaning once again kissing more boldly this time, your hands clutching at his face and moaning softly as your lips met, your hands sliding from his face and into his hair tugging at it in a needy manner. You wanted to make up for all the time you lost pinning from afar, pouring all your affection and feelings into the kiss.

The feeling of you pulling at his hair to kiss—your hands in his hair generally, your moans against his mouth, it was driving JJ absolutely wild. He'd never seen you like this before (not that he had a chance to), so needy and desperate, and it was like a drug, a drug he couldn't get enough of.

He deepened the kiss in response, his mouth moving against yours hungrily, fiercely, his hands sliding down to your hips, pulling you close so your body was flush against his. He'd never wanted someone so much in his life.

As your bodies pressed together, JJ felt his control slipping further and further away, the desire to be a gentleman replaced raw desire. The feeling of you in his arms, your hands in his hair, your body against his, it was all too much, and he found himself struggling to hold back, to keep himself from completely losing control. He pressed you harder against the wall, his body pinning you in place, trapping you between him and the wall, his mouth moving against yours almost brutally, his tongue delving into your mouth with a possessive need.

You matched the pace of his kiss, your fingers almost clawing at his scalp as you kissed him. It was insane, how 3 hours ago roughly you would've never imagined you would be at his friend's house making out with him against the wall—near the door, not even moving to the bed or anything. What was more insane was the fact that you enjoyed kissing JJ so much, and you weren't even shy about it at that point.

You probably should consider yourselves lucky that you were here, in this dark room away from the kegger. Because you probably looked disheveled, your dress bunched up and one of the straps slipped down your shoulder, moaning into his mouth while he pressed you against the wall roughly, positioned between your legs, which were wrapped around his waist loosely. Mind blowing.

JJ was beyond caring about anything besides you at that point. The party, the time, the place, his friends, nothing else mattered except you. The way your body felt against his, the way you were reacting to his kiss, the way you clung to him, it was all he needed in that moment.

He didn't bother to be gentle anymore as he pressed you against the wall, his body pinning you in place, his hands roaming over your body, his mouth devouring yours ruthlessly.

He couldn't get enough of you.

He had no idea how long he held you against the wall like that, his mouth on yours, his body pressed against yours, his hands touching and roaming over you greedily. It could have been minutes or hours, and he wouldn't have cared either way.

Finally, reluctantly, he broke the kiss, pulling back slightly so he could look at you (and breathe), his breathing ragged, his eyes dark with desire. He gently cupped your face in his hand, his fingers tracing softly over your cheek.

When he broke away you took the chance to breathe, seeing as breathing through your nose wasn't enough, panting gently and adjusting your glasses, "That's so-... i wanna do it over and over.." you chuckled breathlessly, your teeth gnawing at your bottom lip.

JJ felt a wave of satisfaction wash over him as he watched you, panting and breathless, the sound of your soft laughter almost making his heart burst in his chest.

He couldn't believe that this was you, the shy and reserved girl he'd always known, the one who barely spoke to a soul, and now here you were, pressed up against a wall, gasping and panting, looking so beautiful it was almost painful. Kissing him nonetheless.

"Yeah? You wanna keep kissing me, mouse?" he said, a small smirk on his face as he watched you gnaw on your lip.

You nodded silently, grinning at him while your eyes darted across his face in awe. If this was what it felt like to have a boyfriend you realized you had been missing out on so many things. But it was worth the wait it seemed, because it was JJ and you wouldn't even be this comfortable doing these things with no one else.

JJ smiled as you nodded, a wave of affection washing over him. He'd never really dated anyone before, but with you, it all just felt so natural, so easy. Just like waking up next you that morning felt. He realized that he was a bit silly for getting scared of the intimacy of that moment. More so while he carried a picture of you in his wallet everywhere he went like a lovesick boyfriend.

He leaned in, gently kissing the side of your neck, his lips trailing down to your shoulder, tasting the bare skin where your dress' strap had slipped down.

"You're so damn beautiful, mouse. All flushed and panting, lookin' like a goddamn mess.."

He pulled back, looking at your disheveled state, your messy hair, your flushed face, the strap of your dress that had slipped down, revealing the skin of your shoulder, and he found himself wanting more. He wanted to see what you looked like completely wrecked, completely undone by him. the thought made his heart thump faster in his chest.

"You know, I can think of a few more things I wanna do with you besides kissing." he said in a low, gruff whisper.

"Like what?" you asked narrowing your eyes, still grinning.

JJ's smile widened as you played coy, your grin and narrowed eyes almost defiant. It was an adorable contrast to the flustered, needy mess you had been just moments before.

He leaned in closer to you, his mouth hovering just above your ear, his voice a soft, seductive murmur.

"Oh, I got a lot of things in mind, mouse. Things that'll make you scream my name, things that'll make you forget your own damn name."

You grimaced teasingly, "that's so corny.." you muttered, chuckling breathlessly. Despite the teasing lilt in your voice, his words were very arousing. Even if in a corny way.

JJ's smirk curled into a wider smile as you teased him, calling him corny. He'd expect no less from you.

He lifted his head, moving his mouth to your ear, his teeth gently nipping at the sensitive skin, as his hand slid up your thigh, lifting up the hem of your dress slightly. "Oh yeah? You want me to be less corny? Or should I show you how corny I can really be?"

His hand continued to slide up your thigh, his fingers slowly moving under your dress, his lips moving from your ear down to your neck, kissing and biting your skin gently, leaving little marks that only the two of you would be able to see. As if he hadn't left blaring red and pink hickies all over your neck already.

He chuckled against your skin, his other hand gripping your hip, pulling you against him firmly. "Or should I just shut up and keep my mouth busy doing something else?"

"I like the last option better.." you smirked, cupping his face once again as he continued to nip at the flesh of your neck, your eyes trained to his lips.

JJ chuckled again, the sound low and rough. He loved how eager you were to be with him, how you wanted him just as much as he wanted you. It was a feeling he'd never experienced before, and it was addictive.

He looked at your eyes, trained on his lips, and he felt a stirring in his gut, a heat pooling within him. Your eyes were practically begging for him to kiss you, and who was he to refuse? He leaned in, his mouth meeting yours in a deep, insistent kiss.

His hand on your hip gripped you tighter, pulling you closer, while his mouth deepened the kiss, his tongue pushing past your lips, delving into your mouth, hungry and insistent. He wanted more, he needed more.

His hand under your dress moved higher, his fingers tracing over your inner thigh, his touch setting off sparks of pleasure that shot through your body as his finger brushed over your clothed core before he moved them away.

His hands moving under your dress more insistently, groping the flesh of your inner thigh. The feeling sent a kind of warmth at the pit of your stomach that you never felt before. You moaned softly into the kiss, your head leaning forward gently deepening the kiss, as if you were afraid he'd pull away.

The sound of your moan sent a jolt through JJ, his blood heating at the sound. Your soft, needy little moan was like music to his ears, and it only made him want you more. He wanted to see what other noises he could coax from you, what other ways he could make you moan and moan and moan.

He deepened the kiss in response, his tongue twining with yours, his hand gripping your thigh a little tighter, his fingers tracing higher, seeking as much of your skin as he could touch.

He broke the kiss, his lips moving to your neck, sucking and biting at the sensitive flesh, leaving little marks that would surely be visible later.

His hand moved higher, his fingers brushing against the edge of your underwear once again, feeling the heat and dampness between your legs. "Goddammit, mouse. You're so damn hot, you know that? and so wet.."

No one had referred to you as hot. It was corny to think about but as his fingers brushed higher between your legs you couldn't help but let out a shudder and a small moan, looking at him with a look between amusement and arousal.

JJ's heart thumped faster in his chest at the sight and sound of you, your look a mix of amusement and arousal, your head tilting back slightly as his fingers touched you. It was a sight he wanted to see over and over again, he wanted to make you moan and mewl like that over and over again. Didn't matter when. Taking him from behind? Above him? Under him? In your room? On the beach? JJ wanted to see all of those and then some.

His mouth moved down to your neck, leaving a trail of biting kisses along your skin as his fingers traced over the damp fabric of your underwear.

He could feel how wet and hot you were, and it was sending his mind reeling, his body tight with need, his control slipping further and further away.

He could feel the heat growing between you, could feel it like a physical presence in the room, and it was all he could do to push down the urge to lose himself completely.

His mouth moved to your ear, his breath hot against your skin, his voice a rough, ragged whisper. "Want you so damn bad, mouse. Can't think of anything else but you. Not right now, not for the past weeks."

Your thighs clenched a little, your legs wrapping around his waist tighter, almost shyly as his fingers ghosted over you, rubbing slow circles over your clit. It was dizzying, and a little pathetic to be honest, to shudder just from a few feather light touches, especially when you were probably so turned on he could feel it. You were beyond caring, your breathing heavy and your head thrown back a little.

JJ groaned at the sight of you, your thighs clenching around his waist, your legs wrapped around his body. The way you were responding to his touch, the way you were panting and shuddering, it was driving him crazy.

He pressed himself against you, his hard erection straining against his shorts, pressing against your core. He bit back another moan as he felt your heat against him, his control stretched thin, his mind clouded by the need to be inside you or anything to release the pressure in his lower belly.

He bit back another moan as he felt your heat against him, his control stretched thin, his mind clouded by the need to be closer, to be inside you, to make you scream his name in pleasure.

He pushed you against the wall, his hands gripping your hips, his mouth moving to your ear.

"You have no idea what you do to me, mouse. No idea how bad I want you right now. Gonna give you what you want..."

Your hands gripped at his shoulder gently, your legs pulling his closer rolling your hips hesitantly against his obvious arousal, without realizing. You were still pressed up against the wall so the action was a bit strained but full of need, and your eyes were locked despite feeling so shy you could pass out. The sight of you would probably get a nun to pass out though, all disheveled and letting out sinful sounds, letting him dry hump you. It was unbelievable to you that this was the same person having trouble while ordering food or speaking to the cashier.

JJ's breath hitched in his throat as you pushed against him, your body rolling against his, your need for him clear in every movement you made. It was a sight he'd never imagined seeing from you, the usually quiet, shy girl who was now in his arms, moaning softly, looking at him with a look that was a mix of shyness and desire.

He knew he should stop this, he knew he should pull away before they both did something they might regret.

But he was past the point of caring.

He slammed you back against the wall, his body fitting against yours tightly, like two pieces of a puzzle.

He lifted you up just slightly, his hands grabbing your thighs and pulling your legs around his waist more securely, the move bringing your core against him in a way that made him bite back a moan.

His breath was hot against your neck as he started to speak, his voice strained with need and desperation. "Mouse, you gotta say something, or I'm gonna lose it."

Before you spoke another soft moan left your lips involuntarily, "what... what am i supposed to say?" you asked, your hands still digging into his shoulders, taking small fistfuls of his shirt, your heart beating so loudly that it rang in your ears.

JJ gritted his teeth as you replied, your soft moan and voice driving him closer to the edge, his self-control hanging on by a thread.

He pressed you hard against the wall, his hips grinding against you, making sure you could feel how hard he was, how badly he wanted you. "Say something, anything. Just gotta make sure you want this, mouse. Or I might do something we'll both regret."

"Regret? no.. fuck no." you questioned, another moan leaving your lips as you spoke, "i thought it was obvious i wanted this.." your voice was strained and soft, still shy and a little overwhelmed to speak properly.

Your words, so out of character for you yet so sweet and hot, sent a surge of desire coursing through JJ's body.

He wanted you, wanted you so badly he could barely think straight.

He let out a guttural moan, his hips grinding against you again, his head buried in the crook of your neck, his voice rough and ragged against your skin. "Just making sure... didn't want to assume anything."

He lifted his head, looking at you, his eyes darkened with need and lust, his breathing heavy. He leaned in, his mouth hovering just over yours, his breath hot against your lips.

"Need you, mouse. Need you so damn bad, I don't think I can hold back anymore and be a gentleman."

"What.. what do we do now?" you asked, and regretted it after. It was a stupid question but you were itching to ask it Even if it ruined the mood in the process.

JJ chuckled softly, finding your question adorable and incredibly sexy at the same time. It was the perfect mix of shyness and boldness, completely unexpected from the normally reserved you, and he found he liked it a lot.

He pushed you up against the wall again, his body pressed against yours, his mouth moving to your neck, leaving a trail of soft, open-mouthed kisses along your skin. Not bites, just tender kisses "We do what we want. Anything and everything we want."

"Yeah but... like, i mean i dunno how this works.. you gotta coach me through or something.." you snorted in amusement at your own words, a bit distracted by the way he was kissing your neck.

JJ's mouth curled into a smirk against your neck as you spoke, the sound of your voice, so soft and vulnerable, mixed with the shyness and eagerness in your words, was like music to his ears.

He lifted his head, his eyes meeting yours, his voice low and gravelly as he spoke.

"You want me to coach you, huh?"

He leaned in closer, his lips brushing against your ear, a low, ragged whisper. "I think I can do that."

His hands tightened around your thighs, his fingers gripping you firmly as he held you against the wall, his mouth moving back to your neck, nipping and biting at the sensitive skin.

He gently rocked his hips against you, his jeans rubbing against your core, the sensation sending sparks of pleasure through both of your bodies.

He spoke again, his voice rough and ragged, his breath hot against your ear. "This okay, mouse? Feel good?"

You let out a long hum nodding, the sound mixed with a moan at the feeling of his hips against you, your legs spreading a little, as much as they could while being wrapped around his waist and your back still against the wall.

JJ groaned at the sound of your moan, your body responding to his touch, your legs wrapping around his waist, opening you up to him and the hot friction of his body against yours.

He pressed himself against you, his hips rolling slowly, his erection rubbing against you through the denim of his jeans, the friction making him bite back a moan. "You like that, mouse? You like how it feels when I press against you like this?"

He rocked his hips against you again, his movements slow and deliberate, wanting to memorize every soft, needy little sound you made as he touched you.

His hands moved up, gripping your hips, guiding your body against his, the friction between you both making it harder and harder for him to think straight. "Want more.. want more of those soft, pretty little sounds. Let me hear you moan for me, mouse."

"I need more.." you found yourself speaking between the quiet moans, your expression clearly flustered but very very aroused. Sure you've been turned on before but it seemed to be different when you had another person being turned on by you too. And JJ nonetheless. It was like a dream.

JJ swore loudly as you spoke, your words sending a surge of desire through his body. He loved that sound, your breathless words, the way you were asking for more from him, wanting him as badly as he wanted you.

He grabbed your hips again, his fingers digging into the soft flesh, holding you tightly against him. "Yeah? You need more, mouse? Just tell me what you want, baby, I'll give it to you. Anything you want." he found himself whispering almost desperately, last part coming out as a soft plea. Which he would have been embarrassed about if he wasn't so damn turned on and tipsy on top of it.

"I dunno... what can you give me?" you asked, which frankly sounded better in your head than it did into words "furthest i got was... well fingering?" you spoke hesitantly, feeling unreal that you were uttering these words out loud, "myself of course.."

JJ gritted his teeth as you spoke, your words hitting him straight in the gut, making his cock throb in his jeans.

He groaned softly, his breath hot against your ear, his voice rough and ragged. "Is that so? You never done anything with anyone before?"

"Obviously not.." you chuckled, shifting against him a little, still holding on to his shoulders.

JJ's heart thumped in his chest at the sound of your soft laughter, and he felt a strange mix of desire and protectiveness wash over him. The thought that you had never done anything with anyone else, that you were all his, was both hot and endearing at the same time.

He leaned in, his mouth moving to your neck again, his lips leaving a trail of soft kisses along your skin.

"I like that."

His hands tightened on your hips, his body pressing against yours even more firmly, his need for you growing with each passing second.

He spoke again, his voice low and rough. "That means I get to be your first... your only."

"Yeah.." you hummed, your arms wrapping around his neck pressing your bodies incredibly close.

JJ let out a low groan as you pressed your body against his, your arms wrapping around his neck, the gesture intimate and sweet but also incredibly erotic.

He tilted his head, his mouth moving to your ear, his breath hot against your skin. "And I plan on making it unforgettable for you, mouse."

He started to move his hips again, a slow, steady rhythm that sent jolts of pleasure through both of you.

His hands moved slowly down your thighs, his touch gentle as he caressed your skin, wanting to memorize every inch of you, wanting to learn what made your breath hitch and your body shutter against his.

He was careful not to get too carried away, still wanting to make sure you were enjoying this, still wanting to make sure it was okay.

"That's nice.." you whispered, your brain overwhelmed by the feelings coursing through you. You were clinging to him, almost like you were melding into one, and you could feel your head getting fuzzier with lust. It was exhilarating, his smell was surrounding you and you couldn't get enough of how soft his hair was. Your hands were moving through it, raking through the strands slowly, messing it up even more than it already was.

JJ let out a soft moan as you tangled your fingers in his hair, the feeling of your touch sending a shiver down his spine.

He loved the way you held him, the way your body clung to his, your legs wrapped around his waist, your arms around his neck, like you were trying to get as close to him as possible. He shifted his hips a little, changing the angle, his movement rubbing against you in a way that made your breath hitch in your throat.

He could feel the way you shivered and trembled against him as he moved, and it only fueled his desire for you even more.

He leaned in, his mouth moving to your neck again, his lips ghosting over your skin, his breath hot and ragged against your flesh, his mind swimming from your perfume.

"Sound so damn good, mouse. Like music. I want to hear more of those pretty little sounds you make."

"Are.. should we go further?" you asked gently, tilting your head back a little against the wall, the pleasure of grinding was good, but it wasn't enough, especially with your underwear and his jeans still on.

JJ's breath hitched in his throat at your question, the implications of it sending a surge of desire through his body.

He pulled back just a bit, looking at you, his eyes dark with need and lust. "You want to take it further? Are you sure you're ready for that, mouse?"

"I dunno... well yeah I'm ready... but like am i ready?" you asked, hoping he'd catch what you meant.

JJ smiled at your words, his eyes softening a bit as he realized what you were getting at.

He lifted a hand to your chin, gently lifting your head up so you were looking at him, his thumb brushing against your bottom lip softly. "You mean like, are you ready for me?"

You grimaced awkwardly, grinning a little, "yeah.." you chuckled nodding.

JJ chuckled as well, the sound soft and affectionate. It was cute, the way you were being so shy and awkward, especially considering the position you were currently in, legs wrapped around his waist and pushed up against the wall.

He leaned in, his mouth moving to your neck again, leaving soft affectionate kisses along your skin as he spoke. "Don't worry, mouse. I'll take care of you... just tell me if you want me to stop, okay?"

He shifted his weight a little, adjusting his body against yours, his hips grinding against you again, the move more deliberate and direct this time, making sure he was pressed tightly against your core, the friction sending sparks of pleasure through both of you.

You nodded at his words, knowing if you wanted to stop, you would have shied away a long time ago. The movement caused another wave of heat wash through you, another moan escaping your lips, more sweet than the others.

JJ groaned loudly at the sound of your moan, the sweet, plaintive sound making his jeans feel even tighter and more constricting than before. He leaned in, his mouth moving to your ear as he rocked his hips against you, the friction sending sparks through both of your bodies. "You make the prettiest noises, mouse. Can't wait to hear you really let loose."

He shifted his hips again, changing the angle, a low curse falling from his lips as he was able to grind against you even more firmly than before, his jean-clad erection pressed hard against your core.

He lifted his head, looking at you, his eyes glazed with lust and need, his voice ragged and rough as he spoke.

"Feel that, mouse? That's what you do to me… just from hearing those pretty sounds you make.. just from kissing you."

One of your hands slid down his chest from his shoulder, your finger teasing his belt and toying with the belt loop gently, a sudden spark of confidence igniting in you.

JJ's breath hitched as you trailed your hand down his chest and towards his belt, your touch making his heart thump even harder in his chest.

He watched as you toyed with the belt loop, his eyes locking onto your fingers, the sight making his cock twitch in his jeans. "Mouse, what're you doing?"

You shrugged, your eyes watching him intently as one of your hands continued to toy with his belt loop. You suddenly felt more bold, your fingers slowly undoing it. You expression stayed shy and flustered, despite what you were doing, a small smile tugging at your lips.

JJ's breath hitched again as your fingers undid his belt, the unexpected move making his heart thump even harder in his chest. He watched you intently, his eyes dark with lust and need, his body tense with anticipation.

He swallowed hard, trying to maintain his composure despite the way your touch was making him feel.

"M-mouse, you don't have to-"

He broke off as you started to undo his button and zipper, the sound of the zipper being undone sounding loud in the quiet room. He could feel his heart hammering in his chest, thump thump thump, like he had just run a marathon. Or seen a ghost. Or fuck it, both.

He was torn between wanting to stop you and wanting to see how far you were willing to go.

He was about to say something, to stop you, to tell you that you didn't have to do this, that he didn't want you to feel pressured into something you weren't ready for.

But then your hand slowly moved to the front of his shorts, palming him through the thin fabric of his boxers, and all words flew out of his mind like a flock of startled birds.

You didn't tug the jeans down, you weren't sure if you could in this position anyway without unwrapping your legs from his waist. But your boldness grew, especially when you got the belt undone with just one hand, undid his zipper and pressed your palm against his boxer clad erection. The touch was slow, not rough or fast, just tentative, your brows raising ever so slightly.

JJ's brain short-circuited. All thoughts, all words, all coherent thought gone. All that was left was the sweet, soft pressure of your hand against him, the slow, hesitant touch, so different from what he was used to, so different from what he expected. It was like electricity flowing through his veins, setting every nerve ending on fire.

He let out a sharp, ragged exhale, his eyelids fluttering shut, his head lolling forward, his forehead resting against your shoulder, almost a little out of desperation.

His breathing was ragged and uneven, his body trembling slightly as he tried to control himself, tried to keep from losing control completely. He felt like his whole world had narrowed down to just that one spot where your hand was pressed against him, the touch sending waves of pleasure through his entire body.

He didn't dare move, didn't dare do or say anything, afraid that any motion or sound would break the spell that you had cast over him.

Unsure of what to do, and frankly a little paralyzed by shyness, your thumb rubbed small hesitant circles, applying just a little pressure where your were holding him, gnawing at your bottom lip as you listened to every breath he took and every sound that left his mouth.

JJ's breath hitched again, sharper and rougher than before, his whole body tensing at the feel of your thumb rubbing against him, the small, hesitant circles sending jolts of pleasure through his body.

He groaned softly, almost like it was against his will, his body pressing helplessly into you.

"Mouse… don't… mmmphh…"

He couldn't form a coherent thought, much less a sentence. All he could do was let out soft, ragged sounds, little moans and groans that escaped his lips without his permission. He was trembling now, his whole body taut with need and desire, every nerve ending on fire under your touch. Which he found to be unusual, given JJ wasn't one to shy away or get this worked up over such soft and tentative touches.

He tried to speak, tried to say something, but all that came out was a strangled moan, his body arching helplessly into you.

You were still pressed against the wall, legs wrapped around his waist and your other arm wrapped around his neck for support. Your hand continued to rub through the fabric of his boxers, your eyes darting down from time to time to watch your own hand in awe.

JJ's body was practically thrumming with tension, his muscles straining to hold himself still, to keep from grinding against you the way he wanted to. He was hanging on by a thread, barely holding it together, his breathing coming in ragged, uneven gasps.

He lifted his head from your shoulder, his eyes locking onto yours, his gaze dark and intense, his eyes almost feral with desire.

"Mouse I... please…"

He sounded almost desperate now, his voice ragged and rough. He tried to pull back a little, to give you a chance to stop this before it went too far, but his body seemed to have a will of its own, his hips pressing against you involuntarily, seeking more friction, more contact, more of you.

He was struggling to speak, his words coming out in broken gasps. "Mouse, if you…. If you keep… mmmph… touching me like that…"

Your brain short circuited at the look of desperation on his face, especially at your shy and soft touch. Your eyes were raking over his face, and you wanted more too but the position you were in was kinda awkward and limiting, glancing over his shoulder at the bed.

JJ could feel your gaze on his face, your eyes raking over his features, and he knew what you were thinking.

He leaned in closer, his mouth moving to your ear, his breath hot against your skin. "Mouse... we need to get on the bed..."

He shifted his weight a little, his movements more deliberate now, his muscles flexing as he readjusted his hold on you. He started to take a few steps towards the bed, his hands on your hips, holding you firmly against him, supporting your weight as he moved.

He was careful and gentle as he walked, making sure not to drop or hurt you as he moved across the room. He didn't want to break the moment by being clumsy.

He reached the bed and gently laid you down on the mattress, his body covering yours, his arms on either side of you, holding himself up so as not to put his full weight on you.

He looked down at you, his gaze roaming over your face, taking in every feature, every freckle, every little detail. You looked so sweet and innocent like this, lying under him on the bed, your hair fanning out around you like a halo.

He was breathing hard, his chest rising and falling with each ragged breath, his heart hammering in his chest like it was trying to break out of his ribcage.

As he set you down on the bed your body relaxed, reaching up to take off your glasses gently and set them down on the nightstand near the bed, your hands then cupping his face. He looked so pretty all flushed and looking down at you with his hair all messy and draping down too as he leaned over you.

JJ's eyes darkened further at the feel of your hands on his face, your touch so gentle and soft. Nobody had ever looked at him the way you were looking at him now, like he was something precious, something special.

"Mouse..."

He leaned down, his body pressing against yours, his mouth moving to your neck, his lips brushing over your sensitive skin, leaving soft, tender kisses along the curve of your shoulder.

"What JJ?" you asked quietly, a small chuckle leaving your lips as he slid the straps of your summer dress gently to kiss your shoulders and neck, the feeling a little ticklish and arousing you more if that was possible.

"You... mmmph... are so... pretty.."

JJ's words were mumbled against your skin, his mouth making its way up your neck, leaving soft, tender kisses as he went. His hands were moving now, roaming over your body, tracing every curve, every contour, like he was trying to memorize the feel of you.

Your body felt so small and fragile under him, your skin so soft and smooth, and he was being careful not to hurt you, even though his hands were practically aching with the need to touch you everywhere.

He moved lower, his mouth moving down to your collarbone, leaving more kisses there, his lips warm and soft against your skin. He was breathing in your scent, a mixture of vanilla and something sweeter, something he couldn't quite place but that he was quickly becoming addicted to. You smelled like vanilla and strawberries last time he saw you.

His hands moved to the hem of your dress, lifting the fabric slowly, pushing it up over your hips, exposing more and more of your skin to his gaze.

Your stomach fluttered at his muffled compliment, your hands resting into his hair, raking through it almost soothingly as he continued to kiss your neck and shoulders tenderly yet hungrily, his hands lifting your dress little by little.

JJ groaned softly as you ran your hands through his hair, the feeling sending a shiver down his spine. He leaned into the touch, almost like a cat being petted, his body arching into you instinctively.

He pulled back a bit, looking down at the exposed flesh of your stomach, his hands roaming over your skin, tracing over the soft curves of your hips and thighs.

He gently spread your legs, his body settling in between them, his weight pressing down on you, pinning you to the mattress.

He leaned down again, his mouth moving to your stomach, his lips leaving a trail of hot, moist kisses along your skin, slowly making their way lower and lower, his hands pushing your dress up over your hips, exposing more of you to his hungry gaze.

As he spread your legs, settling between them and trailing the reverent kisses down your stomach your breath hitched. It was like your body was already aware of what he was about to do, his hands bunching up the soft sage green material of your slip dress pushing it up. Despite being flustered beyond belief, your eyes were following his every move, your brain focused on the feeling of his lips on your warm skin.

JJ could feel the way your body was reacting to his touch, could feel the way you were arching up into him, seeking more of his touch, more of his attention. It was like your body was begging him to continue, like you were desperate for him to keep going.

He lifted his head, his eyes locking with yours, his expression intense and hungry. He held your gaze for a moment, almost like he was asking for permission, then his head dipped down again, his mouth moving down over your stomach and lower, lower...

His hands found the waistband of your panties, his fingers hooking into the elastic, gently pulling them down, his lips trailing over your hipbone, leaving hot kisses in their wake.

His breathing was ragged now, his body tense with need, but he was still being gentle, still being careful not to move too fast, to move too rough. He wanted to draw this out, to make this special for you both.

Your brows shot up as he pulled your underwear down slowly, your hips raising from the bed a little as if to help him, without even realizing.

JJ smiled at the way your body responded to his touch, the way you lifted your hips to help him, even before you realized you were doing it. It was so damn cute, almost innocent.

He let out a soft chuckle, his fingers still hooked into the elastic of your panties. "Eager, are we?"

He tugged your underwear down the rest of the way, his eyes never leaving yours, watching your face the whole time, taking in every little expression, every little gasp and moan that escaped your lips.

He tossed the scrap of fabric aside and gently parted your legs, his hands tracing up your inner thighs, his touch almost feather light, leaving a trail of fire in its wake.

He settled in between your legs and hooked them over his shoulders, his body pressed against you, his chest rising and falling with each deep, ragged breath. He was looking down at you, his eyes roaming over your naked lower body, taking in every detail, every curve, every inch of exposed skin.

He was so close, so close to where you wanted him, but he was still taking his time, still being gentle, still being patient. He was savoring this moment, wanting to commit it to memory.

Your breathing grew more ragged as he leaned down, gnawing at your bottom lip as you gazed at him in anticipation. He looked even more beautiful, between your legs, his hair tickling the inside of your thigh gently as kissed and teased you, your hand darting out to push it out of his face gently and shakily.

When you touched his hair, JJ felt a shiver run through his body, your touch sending jolts of electricity through his veins. He leaned into the touch, his eyes fluttering shut for a moment, before looking back up at you again, his expression almost feral now, his eyes burning with need and desire.

He gently parted your legs a little more, giving himself more room to work with, and gently blew a stream of hot air over the sensitive flesh of your core watching your face intently for a reaction.

The sensation made your legs twitch involuntarily, and a strangled moan escaped your lips before you could stop it. JJ saw the way your body reacted to his touch and a cocky smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. "Hmm... like that, do you?"

You nodded, your thighs threatening to close around his face for a split moment in nervousness, your teeth still gnawing at your bottom lip. It was insane, how just a small huff of air made you react so.. eagerly. It would've been embarrassing too, if you weren't so turned on.

JJ chuckled softly at your reaction, your legs almost closing around him involuntarily. He could feel the tension in your body, could feel the way you were already so worked up and desperate for him.

"Oh, I see... you're a little needy, aren't you, Mouse?" He leaned down again, his mouth skimming over your slick fold, his tongue darting out to tease you, just barely making contact. He wanted to prolong this for as long as he could, to draw this out as long as he could.

He flattened his tongue against you, slowly licking upwards to brush against your clit, his eyes fluttering shut as he took in the taste of you, his hands tightening on your thighs. God, you tasted so good JJ wasn't sure how long he was gonna be slow and gentle for.

When he applied more pressure you couldn't help the moan that escaped your lips, almost like a whimper. The contact was slow but your body felt it like a strike of lightning, the hand in his hair taking a fistful of it. Your body arched up gently, almost like a twitch, your eyes fluttering closed.

JJ groaned softly as you tugged at his hair, the feeling sending a spark of pain through his body that somehow turned into pleasure, heightening the need that was coursing through him. He wanted more, more of you, more of your little gasps and whimpers. He knew he had you right where he wanted you now, lost in lust and desire, eager and willing and completely under his spell. "so sensitive..."

He pressed a gentle kiss against you, just above your clit, almost like he was teasing you, and when he spoke his voice was thick with need.

"Mouse... tell me... what you want... I'll give you anything... just say it... tell me what you want"

Maisy had told you before how getting eaten out felt. Of course you could only imagine it up until a point, given you never actually experienced the thing. 'The thing is, if the guy doesn't wanna do it, it's just routine for the both of you... but god, Y/n/n if he does...' Maisy told you before. And you understood, somehow in this moment her words made sense because JJ actually seemed to revel into what he was doing.

You tried steady your breathing, opening your eyes to gaze down at him, and the sight alone almost made you finish. He looked like he was the one on the receiving end, not you, his eyes already watching you intently, "just.. keep going that's... that feels good." surprisingly you managed to speak, even praise him a little.

JJ felt a surge of pride at your words, his ego growing even more as you praised him. It was music to his ears, to hear you telling him he was doing well, that he was making you feel good. He smirked, knowing that he had you right where he wanted you now, completely at his mercy.

He chuckled again, his breath warm against your skin as he spoke. "As you wish, sweet thing..."

He lowered his head again, his mouth finding your most sensitive spot once more. His tongue traced slow, teasing circles around your clit, not quite touching it, but giving you just enough to keep you on edge. His hands were still on your thighs, holding you firmly in place, making sure you couldn't move before JJ leaned in, his tongue flicking out to trace your slit, a low moan escaping him at the taste of your arousal. "Fuck, baby, you taste like fuckin' heaven," he rasped still not over the way you tasted, his grip tightening on your thighs as he dove in, his mouth covering your pussy completely.

Your head tilted back against the pillow once more, your thighs closing around his head a little, small moans leaving your lips with every movement of his tongue, his face buried between your legs. The sight was probably so lustful, that if someone were to walk in they wouldn't even recognize you. Your hand still in his hair, hips arching to meet every movement of his lips or tongue.

JJ's mind reeled as you wrapped your thighs around his head. It was such an intimate gesture, almost possessively keeping him in place, like you were claiming him as yours. The sight would have driven any man wild, but even more so with JJ, who had never in his life ever felt wanted or loved or needed. He'd never in his life felt even remotely treasured, and suddenly here you were, trembling and arching up into him, making these little needy sounds, clutching at him, as if you never wanted to let him go.

It was too much, nearly overloading his brain.

He groaned against your pussy, the vibrations sending shockwaves of pleasure coursing through your core. He could feel your thighs trembling around his head, your nails digging into his scalp as you gripped his hair tighter. Fuck, he loved how responsive you were, how fuckin' eager for his touch.

He focused his efforts on your clit, sucking and flicking the sensitive bud with the skill of a guy who knew exactly what he was doing. His tongue delved deeper, plunging into your tight heat, fucking you with broad strokes that had your hips bucking against his face.

But JJ wanted more, so much more than that. He slid two fingers knuckle-deep into your dripping cunt, pumping them in and out of your tight heat at a good pace. At the same time, he zeroed in on your clit with laser focus, sucking the sensitive bud between his lips and flicking it with his tongue.

JJ curled his fingers just right, rubbing that special spot deep inside you that made your toes curl and your eyes roll back in your head. "Come on, sweetheart. Give it to me. Wanna hear you scream my fuckin' name as I make you cum harder than you ever have before," he demanded his hot breath washing over your pussy, his fingers pumping faster,

You were already close, your writhing somehow intensifying under his mouth, your body almost arched up in place in pleasure. Your voice drawled out, moans a little higher and more longer now, your legs wrapped around his head and slung over his shoulders loosely.

JJ could feel that you were close, could hear it in your voice, could see it in the way your body was writhing and arching against him. He was loving every second of this, loving the power he had over you, the way he was making you feel. It was addictive, the feeling, and he knew he was hooked for life.

He lifted his head for a moment still pumping his fingers in and out of you, his eyes burning into yours, a smirk on his lips, even as he spoke.

"Are you gonna come for me, Mouse?" His voice was deep and hoarse, almost rough, his lips damp and hair mussed up as he locked eyes with you, watching you intently, waiting for your answer.

Fuck yeah, you thought, the only thing you could manage was a small whimper as you nodded, your brows scrunched up in pleasure, eyes raking over his face as he lifted his head for a moment. God, he was so pretty, and not only because he was eating you out.

JJ smiled at the whimper that came from your lips, his heart swelling with some strange foreign feeling in his chest, a feeling he'd only ever dared to dream of, but never knew how to recognize or understand. It was love and tenderness and something deeper. He ignored it though, he could think about that later, not while he ate you out and finger-fucked you.

When you nodded, JJ let out a low growl, deep in the back of his throat, his eyes boring into yours, his words hoarse and thick with need.

"Good girl..." he said, his free hand tightening on your thigh, his mouth diving back down to give you what you wanted, what you needed. The praise fell easily from his lips, even though he didn't know why he was doing it. It felt right in the moment, and JJ always followed his gut feelings, even if they didn't make sense in retrospect. And in this moment, his gut was telling him to praise you, to make sure you knew how good you were being.

You mewled quietly at his small praise not having much time to think about how it made you feel because he was back to working on you, even more intensely than last time and you knew you were just on the edge. You could feel it in your lower stomach, both of your hands in his hair now. If you weren't so worked up maybe you'd apologize for squeezing him that tightly but in the moment you didn't have it in you. Your moans, although still shy and characteristic to you, were now a little more high pitched, a little less held back.

JJ could feel your arousal coating his chin and dripping down onto the bed under him and it was so hot. The obscene sound of your juices squelching as he pumped his fingers in and out of your tight heat filled the room, mingling with the crude slurps and suckles of his greedy mouth.

"I'm gonna.. I think I'm-.." you panted, your words shaky as they slipped from your parted lips, melting with moans and sighs of pleasure. You looked down at him, brows knitting up in pleasure at the focus etched on his face as he just watched his fingers drive inside you, making eye contact with you before diving in once again.

Eye contact was so hot, especially when he looked like that. And did the things that had your eyes rolling in the back of your head, and your hands grinding his face against you almost desperately. Your thighs were spasming gently, back arching a little as you clamped your legs around his head like a snake encircling its prey.

JJ couldn't care less if you were squeezing his head with your thighs. In fact, he loved it, loved knowing that he was making you feel so good that you couldn't help but cling to him in pleasure. It was the best he'd ever felt in his life, all his senses flooded with you, with the taste and the feel of you round his fingers or the sound of you, completely coming undone for him.

He could feel your walls starting to flutter and clench around his fingers, your body tensing as your orgasm rapidly approached. He gazed up at you with lust-darkened baby blues, a small grin spreading across his face as he watched you come undone above him.

"That's it, baby.. look at me while I make you cum," he murmured softly, his fingers pumping faster, his tongue lashing over your clit with firm strokes. "I wanna see those pretty eyes roll back in your head as I send you fuckin' flyin'."

JJ could feel your thighs trembling violently around his head, your nails digging into his scalp like a woman possessed. He fuckin' loved it, loved the way your body responded to his touch, the way you grinded your soaked cunt against his face like you were fuckin' starved for it.

He felt your body tensing up, on the edge, and then he heard you whining his name in a whimper and that was it for him. It was the sexiest sound he'd ever heard in his life, and he knew he would be replaying that sound in his head on repeat, over and over again.

A few more moments and the pressure in your lower stomach snapped, your body arching up and breathing rattling gently, lips parted in pleasure as you let out a strangled moan, legs wrapped around his head more tightly than before. You tensed for a couple of long seconds, head thrown back in ecstasy as your thighs closed around his head even more tightly, the orgasm washing over you and knocking your breath out of your lungs, your moans almost inaudible.

JJ groaned as you squeezed his head between your thighs, the feeling almost painful and yet somehow pleasing. He didn't mind being squeezed tight, in fact he loved it. It made him feel like he was wanted, like he was desired and treasured and needed, all things he'd never in his life ever felt or experienced before. He pushed down the strange unfamiliar feeling that was beginning to form again in his gut, and instead focused on you, on making you feel good.

He didn't let up, though. No, JJ kept suckin' and lickin' and fingering your spasming cunt, workin' you through each wave of your intense climax. He wanted to draw it out, make it last as fuckin' long as possible. Wanted you to feel this fuckin' incredible every second until you were completely fuckin' spent.

He gave you a few more gentle licks, just enough to ease you down from the high, before lifting his head again, his eyes burning into yours.

He smirked, his tongue darting out and licking his lips, binging his arousal-coated fingers up to his mouth, makin' a show of licking them clean. 

If it would have been humanly possible you would've came a second time as his smirked up at you, licking his lips and fingers in the most sinful and erotic way. Genuinely how was this guy between your legs, instead of sleeping with someone more.. his type? "goodness gracious.." you muttered, your head tilting back on the pillow, one of your hands reaching to rub your face, the other still in his hair, almost limp now. Just like your thighs.

JJ chuckled at the way you spoke, your voice hoarse and shaky as you tried to catch your breath. He was pretty smug, proud of the effect he had on you, smug to know that he had made you feel good. He gently patted your hip, signaling for you to release his head from the grip of your thighs.

He rose up on his elbow, looking at you, his eyes roaming over your face and down to your body. You looked utterly debauched and JJ loved the sight, almost like he'd won some kind of trophy.

He smirked again as he leaned forward, propping himself up above you. His face was just inches from yours, his voice low and rough as he spoke. "Did I do good, sweetheart?"

Did he do good?? it was like you went to heaven and back for a split second there, and he's asking you if he did 'good'. You ascended to the heavens and he was smirking casually down at you like it was the most normal thing, "good..?" was all that you managed to ask, your voice breaking a little full of disbelief.

JJ chuckled at your reaction, his ego swelling even more. The fact that you were so stunned, almost like you were dumbfounded, just from what he did to you, made his chest puff up in pride a little.

He lowered himself down to rest his head on your stomach, his cheek pressing against your skin. He looked up at you from this angle with a smug look on his face. "I'll take that as a yes."

He nuzzled his head against your stomach, almost like a cat, his arms coming up to wrap around your waist, holding you loosely. He was strangely content in this moment, his mind quiet for once, his thoughts not running a mile a minute. Instead, he was focused on purely you, on the way you felt against him, the way you smelled, the way your hands felt on his skin.

As he nuzzled his head against your stomach you took the time to steady your erratic breathing, your hand reaching up to rake through his hair. You were a little in shock, not believing that this had actually happened and that he was actually your boyfriend, "... so you're my boyfriend now right?" you asked after almost a minute of silence, save for your breathing, regretting the hesitant question instantly. He called you his girl, or something along those lines when he was kissing you, but JJ didn't say the word boyfriend and girlfriend.

JJ's heart nearly stopped at your question, at the use of the word 'boyfriend'. For a second he just laid there, his face buried in your stomach, his arms wrapped around your waist. He could feel his stomach clenching with some strange emotion again, his heart beating in his chest, his mind racing with thoughts.

He lifted his head slowly, looking up at you, his eyes searching your face. He wasn't good with emotions, but he felt so strongly for you that the thought of being your boyfriend felt like a lifeline.

For a second you just looked at each other, which scared you mildly, regretting the awkward question more now that you were just staring into his blue and intense eyes silently. You felt your self grimace awkwardly, "sorry.."

JJ shook his head, his arms holding you a little tighter, almost possessively.

"Don't apologize. It was a good question."

He said it quietly, his eyes still fixed on your face, his expression unreadable. His heart was still thumping in his chest, and he still didn't understand the feeling that was rushing through his body, but he knew he should pull himself together and answer your question before you got even more worried.

Your grimace deepened, suddenly feeling awkward at having asked in the first place and making everything strange and quiet. It made a lump form in your throat, your breath rattling a little when you inhaled.

JJ's eyes traced your face, taking in the expression on your face. He could see that you were starting to get uneasy and he didn't like it, he liked you happy and at ease with him, so he decided to speak.

"Mouse..." He said quietly, his voice soft, his fingers tracing small circles on your skin.

"What?" you asked meekly cutting him off gently, your brows furrowing a little as your face melted into a small frown without realizing, thinking you misread his earlier signals.

JJ's chest ached at the sight of your frown, and his hand came up to cup your cheek, his thumb gently grazing your skin. He gazed at you for a moment, his eyes soft, his voice even softer as he spoke.

"Stop frowning like that..."

One of your hands came up to cover your mouth, "sorry.." you apologized again, your eyes darting around the room for a little. 'God now it was all awkward and he'd have to say something out of pity' you thought.

JJ felt a pang in his chest when you covered your mouth. He didn't like that, he didn't want you to be nervous or insecure around him. He wanted you to feel comfortable, safe.

"Hey, hey, look at me..." He said quietly, his hand on your cheek trying to tilt your face to look at him.

You propped your self gently on your elbows, locking eyes with him, "maybe i should go..?" you spoke, the awkward grimace back on your face as you questioned quietly.

JJ's heart dropped at your words. Go? Why would you want to go? No, he didn't want you to go. "No, no, no. You don't have to go." He said quickly, his hand on your cheek moving to tangle in your hair and hold the back of your neck gently.

He leaned forward and pressed his forehead against yours, his body shifting so that he was a little closer to you now.

"I don't want you to go." He murmured, his voice barely above a whisper.

"I didn't mean to ask that.." you murmured, blinking a couple of times as you locked eyes with him, his forehead resting against yours.

JJ's thumb stroked your neck gently, trying to soothe the tension he was feeling rising in your body. "It's okay, you don't have to apologize. I'm glad you asked, I just..."

He trailed off, suddenly feeling shy and sheepish, which was not an emotion JJ Maybank was familiar with at all. He took a deep breath, steadying himself before continuing to speak. "I just want you to be happy, okay? I don't want you to feel like you have to walk on eggshells around me. You can ask anything, say anything, and I won't get mad. I...."

He cut off again, pausing for a moment before forcing the words out.

"I just want you to feel comfortable with me... cause I'm gonna be your boyfriend and all..."

"...You are?" you asked, raising your brows at his words.

JJ rolled his eyes at your disbelief, lifting his head to look at you properly, his arms still wrapped loosely around your waist.

"Did I stutter? Of course I am. Why in the world would I not want to be your boyfriend?" He asked it more rhetorically, a small smirk tugging at the corner of his lips.

—♡‧

A/N: When is it my turn, i say as i fall to my knees, when is it my turn to have a blonde munch surfer thank me by giving me head? i enjoyed writing this one though. But here's your valentines gift for being such sweeties to me, hope i did good. And if you find any mistakes or something its like 4 am atm, just don't mind them okay? I wanted to post this as early as possible and so I'm kinda sleepy. Don't forget to comment or leave asks and join the taglist, i love you all, happy valentines!💕

Tag-list*:･ﾟ✧ @cali-888, @bee-43, @jjscoquette, @melsbels-zip, @stanseventeen @imsiriuslyreal

Previous | Next*:･ﾟ✧

[r4di0h3ad]

just practice part 2

part 1!

pairings! bsf!jj x reader

in which! you cant stop thinking about the night you lost your virginity to jj…. even though you have a boyfriend

warnings! 18+ smut. cheating. fingering. oral sex (m. recieving) pnv sex. unprotected sex. not proof read.

it had been two months since you lost your virginity to jj and almost a month and a half since you started officially dating your new boyfriend.

he was nice. he took you out to eat once a week, he bought you small gifts, he complimented you and you never argued. but the sex was just…bad. it was always over way too quickly and he never payed any attention to your body or what you wanted. you figured he was just one of those boys who was too scared to go down on a girl, which was fine, but it probably wouldn’t suit you in the long run.

you hadn’t been hanging around your friends very often, usually turning them down to go out with your boyfriend and jj was getting increasingly frustrated with this.

but every time you were around your friends, jj in particular, you couldn’t even look him in the eye. when you talked to him, all you thought about was the way he called you baby when he came on your stomach and the way he made you cum on his face. you felt so completely guilty for these thoughts, but nothing would stop them. you figured the best plan of action was to avoid him. not entirely, but just try not to be around him alone.

but, you did end up alone with jj by mistake one afternoon.

you had just finished surfing with kie as the swell had come in that day. you both planned to stay at the beach a little longer, but you were hungry and didn’t have any food. kie decided to go pick up something from the heyward’s shop and you went back to the chateau to grab a six pack, only to find jj working on his bike, his shirt off and his shorts dirty, probably from engine oil.

you didn’t say anything as you walked up the steps to the porch, but jj noticed you and called out.

“hey, y/n!” he yelled, wiping his hands off on a towel and throwing it on his bike. “thought you were gonna stay at the shore until later?”

you were in your damp bikini top and bottoms and a pair of sandals. you turned around at the sound of his voice and met his gaze.

“yeah..” you said. awkwardly. “i am, i was just grabbing some beers.” you turn back around, pulling open the screen door and stepping inside. once you’re in the kitchen with the refrigerator door cracked, you hear jj come into the château after you.

“what’s going on with you?” he asks, standing in the living room. you shut the refrigerator and look over at him with furrowed brows.

“what do you mean?” you question, although you knew exactly what he meant. you didn’t expect the confrontation to happen now of all times.

“don’t act like you don’t know.” he crosses his arms over his chest. “you’ve been weird around me ever since we..”

you didn’t want to hear him say it.

“jj, i’ve just been hanging around my boyfriend a lot,” you try to defend yourself, hoping he’ll stop questioning you. “i’m sorry i haven’t been talking to you. ‘been busy.”

he nods, biting his lip and looking down at the floor.

“do you regret it?” he asks, looking back up at you.

“what?” you shake your head. “no, i just-“

“you promised you wouldn’t make things weird between us and now you barely even talk to me.” jj said. “you sure i didn’t do something wrong?”

“no jj!” your voice raised slightly. “i-“ you cut yourself off, not knowing what to say. “it’s just that every time i try and talk to you, i think about what we did.” you blurt out, almost making it sound like you both murdered someone and hid the body. you made it sound like a crime, and it pogue rules, it technically was. “i thought that avoiding you was gonna take my mind off it until i got over it.”

he walks closer to the kitchen, tossing his hat somewhere on the counter.

“so you do regret it?” he questions, leaning against the counter and looking straight at you.

you shake your head no.

“i don’t, but it’s kind of wrong of me to think about you while my boyfriend’s fucking me.”

you realized what you said after it had already left your mouth and your eyes widened.

“what’d you say?” he asks, cocking his head a little at your admission, a barely visible smile playing on his lips.

“uh-“

you quickly turn around to open the fridge again, looking for some beers to take and get the hell up out of there.

“no, say it again.” jj pulls your arm, twisting you back around to face him so that your bodies were dangerously close together. your face flushed with embarrassment and your heart was thumping out of your chest.

“jj,” you say, shrugging off his touch. “i really gotta go back to the shore.” you say, but you weren’t moving. jj knew that wasn’t what you really wanted.

“i’m not stopping you.” he pulled back from you and leaned against the counter once again, showing that you had free will to leave, but you still didn’t budge. your feet were glued in place.

you wanted to kiss him so bad and get that ridiculous smile off his lips, but the thought of your boyfriend who did little to please you was the only thing that was keeping you from doing it. you bit the inside of your cheek, nervously. the tension between you two was going to make your head explode.

“he doesn’t fuck you like i do, does he?”

his words were your final straw.

you grabbed both sides of his face and instantly connected you lips with his. he kissed you back without a second thought, wrapping his arms around your waist. he backed you into the refrigerator as his lips moved perfectly with yours.

his fingers trailed down your hips and to your clothed core. he pulled away from the kiss to look at you, silently asking for permission for him to touch you, and you gave it.

still having you against the refrigerator’s surface, he skillfully moved your bikini bottoms to the side as two of his fingers sunk into your entrance. you were embarrassingly soaked already. you fight back a moan as he pulled out of you, just to slide right back in, hitting the spot he knew you needed.

“all this and i’ve barely even touched you?” he mocked, taking his fingers out of you and bringing them to his mouth. he looked you in the eyes as he sucked your slickness from his fingers. your lips were parted as you watched, desperately needing his hands on you again.

he then picked you up, his hands hooked under your thighs. you giggled as he carried you to the bedroom, kicking the door closed.

he gently placed you on the bed and reconnected his lips with yours, his tongue swiping yours. you reached to work on his belt, swiftly undoing it and pulling it off while never breaking the kiss. you slid his shorts down, his boxers barely hiding his desperation for you.

you palm him through the fabric, eliciting a groan from him against your lips that you needed to hear more of.

you sunk to your knees in front of him, yanking his boxers down and allowing his painfully hard cock to spring free. you took him in your hand, pumping a few times before your tongue poked through your lips to lick a long stripe from the base of his shaft to the tip.

he gently grabbed your hair, trying to pull you away, but you licked him again, which loosened his grip.

“you don’t have to-“ his eyes rolled back as you finally took him all in your mouth, hollowing out your cheeks as you sucked his cock. your hands were placed on his knees. the moan you heard from him encouraged you to keep going, although his tip was hitting the back of your throat and you were trying hard not to gag. “fuck- baby, you don’t have to do this.”

you pull him from your mouth, a string of spit connecting your lips with his tip.

“i want to.” you say before taking him in your mouth again. he tries to keep his eyes locked with yours, but his head falls back in pleasure, his fingers lacing into your hair.

you only knew how to do this because your boyfriend showed you. you had to keep your eyes closed the whole time so you could pretend it was jj.

his breathing was getting heavier with each rise and fall of his chest as soft moans and strings of curses fell from his lips. he couldn’t help but thrust his hips forward, forcing his cock farther into your mouth. there were tears brimming your eyes as you tried to focus on pleasuring him.

“fuck- m’not gonna last much longer like this.” he said.

you kept going, desperately wanting to bring him over the edge, but he pulled your hair back, taking you off of him.

“gotta stop you, princess.” he grabbed your hands and helped you up from your knees. you sat on the bed, pouting. he stood over you, brushing your hair out of your face and noticing your change of attitude. “didn’t wanna cum like that.”

as much as you wished you could make him cum by sucking him off, you couldn’t complain now that he was giving you attention.

his hands guided themselves to your waist, where he then told you to turn around so you were now on your hands and knees, your ass facing him. he was still standing as he held your hips from the edge of the bed. you felt his tip at your entrance.

“this okay?” he asked.

you give him a yes, and then you feel him slowly enter you. it felt so much different than when he had been on top of you before. there was a slight pain due to how much deeper he could push into you from this angle, but the pain melted into pleasure within seconds.

he pulled out just to drive himself back into you. his pace was slow until you adjusted to the position, and then he steadily began going faster. his fingers dug into the sides of your ass, pulling you into him with every thrust.

as he went harder, you gripped the sheets and stuffed your face into the mattress under you, trying to keep yourself quiet, but you couldn’t stop the moans that escaped your lips.

“fuck-“ jj cursed under his breath, his grip on you getting even harder. “feel so good, can’t get enough of this pussy”

his words brought you closer and his pace increased. you could feel him getting tenser, his thrusts getting sloppier.

“could have you like this every day if i could- shit.”

you were almost over the edge, the knot in your stomach threatening to undo.

“fuck- m’gonna cum princess” he moaned.

his last thrusts were deep and slow and they led you into perfect ecstasy. you came undone around his cock, moaning into the sheets right in time for him to pull out and finish on your back- your name leaving his mouth with curses and moans.

your body was limp when he cleaned your back with a towel, still in a haze from your orgasm.

“you okay?” he asked, running a hand down the middle of your back, feeling the ridges of your spine.

you nodded and sat up, grabbing your bikini from the floor and slipping it back on.

“kie is gonna kill me.” you say, slipping your sandals on your feet. “she’s not gonna believe any excuse i try to give her.”

“i’ll drive you down there.” jj offered. “i mean- are your legs alright to walk all the way to the shore or-“

you threw his shirt at his face and scoffed at him.

you had agreed to let him drive you to the beach while you fixed your hair in the visor mirror, trying to make yourself look presentable. although the whole way there you could only think about the words he said while he fucked you. you had no idea if he meant it or if it was just a thing he said in the moment. and this definitely wasn’t going to help save your thoughts about your boyfriend.

a/n: don’t know if i will write a part 3 to this, but requests are open for any jj or rafe fic!

tag list! (comment or message to be added or removed!)

@ifilwtmfc @sabrina-carpenter-stan-account @xcallmetaniax @moondustedlily @x-0-madi-0-x @tumb1rgir1z

[moonlightrafe]

⋆₊˚⊹♡ 18+, MDNI

Imagine best friend!JJ being in the middle of jacking off to photos of you when you call him. His cock is hard and pre-cum leaks from the tip as he scrolls through your instagram feed. Mainly clicking on the photos of you in bikinis.

A desperate whimper escapes him as he imagines it’s you wrapped around him instead of his hand.

JJ is quickly irritated when his phone first goes off and sets him off pace, but his demeanor changes once he sees that it’s your name lit up on the screen.

The right thing to do would be to let it go to voicemail. It would be disgusting, perverted, even, to pick it up… but he knows he’ll do it anyway. Since when did JJ ever do the right thing? He needs to hear your voice.

“Jayj?” you say when the line picks up and he instantly feels like his heart is going to beat right out of his chest.

“H-hey!” He chokes out, his voice on the brink of inaudibility.

“Hey Jay.”

Fuck. Your voice is perfect, he thinks.

“Um, what’s up?” He stutters as he continues to glide his hand over his thick cock, tugging at it harsher now than before.

“The boys mentioned they hadn’t heard from you yet today, so I wanted to let you know we’ll be down at the boneyard later.”

“Yeah? A party?” he asks coolly as he attempts to keep his composure, a sheen veil of sweat beading on his forehead.

“Mhm, and I need someone to protect me from those douchey, frat boy, kooks,” you flirt innocently, “so I was hoping you’d wanna come?”

Yes, he wanted to cum.

He wanted to cum on your stomach, in your mouth, inside your pussy. Just hearing you say the word nearly sent him over the edge. For a split second he was unable to respond, too focused on his pleasure.

He was close. Too close. It didn’t take much for JJ to cum these days — especially not when the pent up lust he had for you had reached new heights. He just needed you to talk to him some more with that sweet, angelic voice of yours.

As if you read his mind, you let out a deep sigh into the phone.

“Well, JJ? Are you coming or not?” you huff and that is all he needs to be sent over the edge.

“Fuck,” your best friend groans out.

“Yes! I’m— I’m coming,” he chokes into the phone, practically moaning at you as he pumps his cock a few more times, squeezing at the tip before spilling himself into his palm.

“I—I’ll be there,” he reassures you through bated breaths.

“Sheesh, Jay,” you giggle at his enthusiasm, oblivious to the situation. God, you were so fucking innocent.

“I’m glad to know you’re excited, I am too! I’ll see you there! Bye!”

JJ lets out a deep breath as the line disconnects down on your end.

“Yeah,” he mutters to himself, “I’ll see you there.”

He could consider himself totally fucked.

[autumnscribbles]

come back | r.c

summary: you and rafe get into a fight on a night out, when you’re left to find your own way home, you find yourself in a bad position

warnings: drinking, creepy men, i think that’s about it

wc: 2k

a/n: my first official rafe fic!!! thank you so much to the person who sent in this request, i’m a little rusty but had so much fun writing this! pls send more :) enjoy

~~~~~ ~~~~~~ ~~~~~~ ~~~~~~ ~~~~~~

You let out a loud laugh as JJ continued to tell you one of the most ridiculous stories you’ve ever heard. Between fits of laughter, you took small sips from your red solo cup. You were starting to feel tipsy, the alcohol coursing through you. It made everything funnier, and you found yourself leaning in towards JJ, unable to control your laughter. You clutched your stomach as he laughed along with you, his own laughter triggered by how much you were laughing. It was always an endless cycle with JJ, when one of you started to laugh, it was over.

“I’m gonna go get another drink,” you hiccuped, as you stared down at the empty cup in your hand.

JJ patted your leg and nodded at you before you stood up, making your way over to the table where the drinks were. The room spun slightly around you as you clumsily poured yourself another drink. You were mixing it yourself, and chuckled at how heavy handed your pour was. You tilted your head back as you took a sip, nodding to yourself in approval.

As you turned around to head back to the couch you were sitting on, you bumped into a familiar chest. You looked up at your boyfriend, smiling drunkenly at him.

“Hey! There you are!” you cheered, leaning your head on Rafe’s chest as you inhaled his familiar scent.

“Took you long enough,” he scoffed, stepping to the side and approaching the same table you were just walking away from.

“What does that mean?” you asked, furrowing your brows as you took another sip.

“It means you should probably lay off the liquor and maybe don’t hang all over JJ like an idiot,” he retorted, his eyes glued to the table in front of him.

You thought it was hypocritical, him telling you to stop drinking as he poured himself another rum and coke. He drank as much as he wanted, whenever he wanted and you never said a word to him about it. JJ had been your friend since childhood, your family taking him in when he had no one else. You grew up together. Your friendship would always be special.

“You should lay off the liquor,” you muttered under your breath as you walked away from him, going back towards JJ.

“Running back to him?” Rafe called out to you.

You turned around, seeing his bright blue eyes darken as he looked at you. His jaw twitched as he clenched it. You knew he was biting his tongue. Holding himself back from saying something he would really regret.

“You know what Rafe? You’re childish. JJ is my friend, and you know it. Maybe you should stop drinking and you wouldn’t be so fucking delusional,” you bit back.

Rafe rolled his eyes and you walked back over to JJ, plopping on the couch beside him again. He looked concerned as he asked you if everything was okay. You assured him you were perfect, and tapped your cup against his as a cheers.

You ignored Rafe as you saw him walk passed you, not even sparing you a glance. You knew you upset him, and that he was bothered. For once, you didn’t care enough to do anything until you got home. You didn’t want to cause a scene, and more importantly, wanted to have fun with your friends.

After a few rounds of pong with John B, Pope, JJ, and Kie, the alcohol was really getting to your head. You realized you hadn’t seen Rafe since your argument, anXd thought maybe you should look for him.

“I’m gonna get some air and look for Rafe,” you said to your friends, voice raised to be heard over the music. They nodded at you before setting up for another game.

You weaved through drunk, sweaty bodies before stepping outside. You breathed in the fresh air, closing your eyes as everything spun.

“You should lay off the liquor,” you muttered to yourself as you stumbled down the front steps.

You assumed Rafe would be outside. He usually stepped out for air when things were tense between you. He used it as a way to calm down. You were surprised when you didn’t find him.

You glanced down the street full of parked cars. You couldn’t spot Rafe’s truck. Did he leave? Would he? You felt tears springing to your eyes, suddenly feeling guilty for what you said to him. You pulled out your phone, calling him. It rang and rang, but eventually left you on voicemail. You shot him a quick text before sitting on the steps, spinning head in your hands.

“Hey…” you heard an unfamiliar voice behind you.

You looked over your shoulder to see someone you didn’t recognize. Obviously a kook, based on the polo shirt and khaki pants he had on. You had never seen him at one of these parties before. Or maybe, you just never recognized him.

“Hey,” you muttered, pulling out your phone to see if Rafe answered.

“Lost your boyfriend?” he asked, sitting down comfortably beside you. You felt yourself slide over, wanting distance from him.

“No,” you shook your head. “Just waiting for him.”

“Don’t think he’s coming back, sweetheart. I saw him get in his truck,” he chuckled. “I could drive you home though.”

“I’m good,” you answered shortly.

You stood up, taking a second to regain your balance. You had to go home. To find Rafe. You realized you didn’t have the keys to your place. Rafe had them. You came together and were going to leave together. You guessed you’d just knock until he answered once you got there.

You knew you should tell your friends you were leaving, but in a drunken haze you were too focused to go back inside. You’d just text them later.

The boy on the stairs was in a conversation with a clone of himself, so you started walking. The cool evening hair sent a slight chill down your spine, your shoulders exposed. You tried to walk as quickly as possible without falling.

When you heard footsteps behind you, you reluctantly decided to look behind you. You were surprised to find the boy from the stairs and his friend walking a few paces behind you.

You felt your heartbeat pick up a bit, your hand clutching your phone tightly, willing Rafe to call. You took a turn, and realized they were not too far behind you. Enough distance to try to make it seem like they weren’t following you, but you knew.

You decided you’d take the short cut. You had to go through the woods, but it wasn’t too far. The boys behind you wouldn’t know the path, even if they saw you turn off. You’d just run, you thought to yourself.

As you dashed quickly into the woods, your breath was loud in your ears. You were trying not to panic. You would be fine. You heard the footsteps behind you, branches cracking under their feet as their pace picked up. You’d run as far as you could.

Eventually, you slowed down, catching your breath. You squeezed your eyes shut as you tried to listen for the boys following you. Your heart beat hard in your ears as you took deep breaths. You didn’t hear them anymore. You were in the clear.

You pulled your phone out of your pocket and flashed the light, realizing you had no idea where you ended up. You were surrounded by trees, no path in sight.

“Fuck,” you whispered.

You started walking where you thought you had come from, hoping to end up back on the path. You’d tripped over something, landing harshly on the hard ground. You hissed in pain as tears started filling your eyes.

You dialled JJ, thinking maybe you had a better chance of reaching him. No answer. You tried Rafe again, and again, and again.

The third time, he picked up. His voice choppy on the other line because of the bad service.

“Rafe?” you cried, overjoyed that he answered. “I need help I-I was walking home and I cut through the woods to get home but I’m lost.”

“Y/N?” Rafe answered. “Where are you?”

“The woods, I-I don’t know where exactly. Please help me, baby,” you cried.

You couldn’t hear his reply as the call dropped. You cursed under your breath again as you began to cry. You didn’t even know if Rafe heard you. You felt yourself starting to crash, the adrenaline wearing off and the effects of the alcohol hitting you all at once. You felt your eyes flutter shut, and succumbed to the exhaustion.

You eyes opened again to a faint sound in the distance. You sat up, disoriented, your head pounding behind your eyes. You winced as you tried to figure out how much time had passed.

You heard a voice in the distance, and as it approached you realize they were calling your name.

Rafe.

He came.

“Rafe!” you screamed as loud as you could, trying to signal to him where you were.

You heard his footsteps pick up as they got closer, and you kept calling out. Eventually he was in front of you, crouch down as his hands cradled your face.

“Baby, oh my god,” he breathed. “I’ve been looking for you, are you okay?”

“I’m sorry I acted like a bitch,” you cried, falling into his chest. “I shouldn’t have talked to you like that.”

“Shhh I shouldn’t have left you there. I was a fucking asshole. I’m so sorry. What if something happened to you?” he rambled, holding you close.

“These guys were following me so I cut through the woods. I tried to get away,” you breathed. “I didn’t know what else to do.”

“What? Who?” he asked angrily.

“Doesn’t matter,” you sighed. “I just wanna go home.”

*

Rafe brought you inside and into the bathroom, turning the light on.

“You’re hurt,” he whispered. There was a cut down your leg, bleeding from when you tripped. You were covered in dirt, leaves, and branches.

“It doesn’t hurt,” you told him.

“Fuck,” he breathed. “I’m so sorry baby, I can’t say it enough.”

He turned the shower on, the steam starting to fill the room. He helped you gently peel off your clothes and step in, where he joined behind you. He rinsed off all the dirt and blood, and gently massaged your head with shampoo to wash out the dirt. You began uncontrollably sobbing as the warm water fell down your body, and you were so worn out you didn’t even know why anymore.

Rafe dressed you into your favorite pyjamas and brought you to bed, tucking you in gently. All while whispering that you were okay, that he was sorry, and that he loved you. He set down a glass of water beside you, urging you to drink it.

“Do you need anything? Are you hungry? Cold?” he asked.

You shook your head, reaching your arms out to him. He fell on the bed beside you as you lay on his chest, his heart beat faster than normal.

“It’s okay, baby,” you whispered to him, your eyes beginning to close. “I’m okay.

“I don’t know how I can forgive myself,” he said. “What if those guys..” he stopped himself before continuing. He didn’t want to voice what he was thinking. It was unimaginable.

“I shouldn’t have ignored you, or walked away when you were clearly upset. It was stupid,” you muttered.

“It doesn’t matter,” he whispered. “I was just being jealous and stupid. I overreacted.”

“As always,” you chuckled, making the corners of his mouth turn up.

He watched as your eyes began closing, your previously stressed out facial expression smoothing out.

“Just rest, baby,” he cooed as he rubbed his hand along your back. “I won’t leave you again.”

You finally gave in to your exhaustion, just happy to be safe and warm in Rafe’s arms. You didn’t care about the fight anymore, or anything that happened. All that mattered was you were safe. You were okay.

He came back. He would always come back.

[maybanksprincess]

jj maybank headcannons!

warnings: none, pure fluff!

requested by this ask! thank you anon <3

pairings: boyfriend!jj x shy!girlfriend!reader <3

ᥫ᭡ shy!girl!reader who always has to tutor jj because he cant listen in class for shit. lucky for him, his girlfriend has all the notes, cause shes observant <3

ᥫ᭡ shy!girl!reader who tugs on jjs arm when shes ready to leave a public setting, or just wants to get out of a conversation, luckily her boyfriend is good at making excuses.

ᥫ᭡ shy!girl!reader who always asks jj to order her food for her in a drive thru, or when waiters take their order, cause shes too shy to tell them what she wants, afraid she will stutter or say something wrong.

ᥫ᭡ shy!girl!reader who hates going on on dates in public, not because shes embarrased of jj, but because shes scared she will get mean looks.

ᥫ᭡ shy!girl!reader who texts jj when she meets up with him at a place, making him come get her instead of finding him her self

𓆉 boyfriend!jj who always has to make the first move in the relationship, whether it be the first kiss, first time having sex, first time sleepover, etc. but ofc he doesnt mind, because he loves how shy his girl is, he knows that shes only his.

𓆉 boyfriend!jj who doesnt pay attention in school on purpose, so that when he gets home he can call his pretty girlfriend over to teach it to him instead of a lame teacher <3

𓆉 boyfriend!jj who constantly does goofy things to try and get you to bring out your goofy side that he hardly sees

𓆉 boyfriend!jj who randomly pecks your lips or your forehead, during conversations with others when your sitting on his lap, to let you know he's still there

𓆉 boyfriend!jj who always lets you rant about books or movies to him, even if he doesn't understand because he doesn't ever wanna not hear you talk.

[4vanaa]

— MODERN FAMILY.

an outer banks alternate universe

— PAIRINGS dad!rafe cameron x mom!reader | dad!jj maybank x mom!kiara carrera | dad!pope heyward x mom!cleo | dad!john b routledge x mom!sarah cameron | singlefather!topper thornton | uncle! barry |

— SYNOPSIS a slice-of-life series that takes you into the heart of one big, chaotic, and loving family. at the center of it all is you and rafe navigating the ups and downs of parenthood with your own kids—ranging from toddlers to teenagers—while trying to balance your relationship, your personal growth, and the wild, unpredictable moments that come with raising a family. but it’s not just about you, the obx cast is all here. they all have their own families, with different parenting styles, dynamics, and struggles.

— TROPES/TAGS established relationships, slice of life, chaotic family dynamics, fluff, very mild angst, humor, original characters, everyone’s married, parenthood, no real plot, everything is a standalone.

TEASER

—MEET THE FAMILIES 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 |

REQUESTS/DRABBLES.

HEADCANONS.

ONESHOTS.

SMAUS/TEXTS.

a/n: credits to @zyafics for the layout!! this work is also inspired by @papercranesandinkstains elementary smau. and credits to @vesearartistry for the dividers!! heavily inspired by modern family. there is no plot, every drabble/headcanon are all in the same universe but not needed to understand the other. if you’d like to request something you’d like to see just comment below here, or send an ask.

🏷️ taglist: if you’d like to be tagged for this smau, or any future or current ones, you can reply and i’ll add you!!