#jin comfort fic

[wangxianficrecs]

Devil Flute Upon Graves, Wei Ying by cloudyrobinwrites (jwyoomi)

Devil Flute Upon Graves, Wei Ying

by cloudyrobinwrites (jwyoomi) (@chirpycloudyrobin)

M, WIP, Series, 47k, Wangxian & Hualian

Summary: Wei Wuxian received the news of his first death a little bit too late. Kay's comments: I think this series was a Follower Rec during the last WIP Rec Week and I picked it up there, because it sounded absolutely delightful and it sure didn't disappoint! Here, Wei Wuxian died earlier, but he didn't notice! He only noticed when he was staying in the Burial Mounds with the Wens and that changed a lot. For one, he's a ghost, so when he "dies" again, he actually goes full TGCF and even meets Hua Cheng and Xie Lian. Really interesting world-building. The current and ongoing part of the series is a canon retelling of how Wei Wuxian being a death changed his resurrection. Also! Xuanli as Gods! And Jin Ling growing up under their proctection! So much good stuff. Excerpt: “I would know if you’re dead, Wei Wuxian,” Wen Qing tells him. “I’m your doctor.” Wei Wuxian sputters, “W- Well, look again!” He shoves his wrists at Wen Qing, his face just a tad bit hysterical. Okay, maybe he’s not taking this ‘I’ve actually been dead the entire time’ debacle as well as he thought. Wen Qing gives him a look that is half-exasperated and half-concerned and checks his pulse anyways. Maybe she’s thinking that all that demonic cultivation is chipping away at what remains of his sanity. Maybe she’s right. A few moments pass. Wen Qing slowly lets go of Wei Wuxian’s wrists and looks him dead in the eyes. “Wei Wuxian,” Wen Qing says, slowly and deliberately. “What did you do?”

pov alternating, canon divergence, tian guan ci fu fusion, hua cheng/xie lian, ghost wei wuxian, hurt/comfort, burial mounds settlement dwys, post-first siege on the burial mounds, mo xuanyu lives, immortal jiang yanli, immortal jin zixuan, fix-it of sorts, somebody lives/not everybody dies

~*~

(Please REBLOG as a signal boost for this hard-working author if you like – or think others might like – this story.)

[giddyfatherchris]

Bunny threat

Pairing: bts x gn!reader (platonic)

Genre: crack? comedy? all good stuff haha

Warnings: None

Word count: 820

Requests: Open for stray kids and bts!

A/n: okay so funny thing. I wrote this a billion years ago, and forgot it existed (tbh i also forgot i had this account lol). Since i want to bring this page back to life i thought i could update the original version (and correct some grammar mistakes lol) and bring it back as my first official post. So here we go! I hope you like it :))

*gif is not mine

“Stop practicing and come eat!” shouted Jin for the fifth time.

You were all at the studio rehearsing a few new choreos for an upcoming performance. It was now 8:00 pm, and the delivery guy just came in with his precious cargo. As soon as the good smell of the local Korean meals filtered into the room, your seven friends instantly stopped what they were doing to rush on the food like starved men. 

“Y/N! Come before Taehyung eats everything!” urged Yoongi. You faintly heard him scold his younger brother, as he was probably trying to steal said food. 

“Won’t be long. Just let me get this last move right!”

Still in the dance studio part of the room, you just couldn’t be satisfied with the execution of a certain move. It wasn’t precise enough, and you couldn’t eat without having this part right. It would be a defining moment in this new choreo you created for the boys, so you had to get it right. 

Minutes passed, bowls emptied themselves, and you still hadn’t eaten anything. 

“Y/N, stop it now. Too much is like not enough!” advised Joon with his father-like tone. His concern and the smell of the delicious food almost made you stop, but you took a deep breath to focus and went back to dancing without a word. 

“Tae has gotten to the bowl of samgyeopsal!” tried J-Hope to make you rush in to get your hands on your favorite dish. 

“Mmmmmm, SO GOOD!” added the boy while making huge slurping sounds, though you weren’t sure if those disgusted you more than they made you envy him. 

They sat still, waiting to see if you would stop your tireless rehearsing, but you were so intent on doing it perfectly that it felt like they didn’t even exist. 

“They really won’t come to eat.” pouted Jimin while he looked at Namjoon with the saddest puppy eyes. 

“Makes me think of someone,” mumbled Yoongi, not without earning an annoyed sigh from the talented dancer. 

“Alright, Jungkook, I think we need to take drastic measures.” sighed Joonie, already wincing at the idea of your reaction. 

The youngest boy simply nodded, finished his bite, and headed out of the little room without saying a word. The other boys stared at the door, waiting for what was coming. It started with the music stopping abruptly, then you whining, “Oh please, one last time! I was starting to get it. AH JUNGKOOK LET ME DOWN! JEON JEONGGUK!” Some laughed, but they all winced when you started screaming like a lunatic. Jungkook entered the room with you thrown over his shoulder, screaming and whacking his back. He dropped you on a chair and went to his plate with the most unbothered expression. You opened your mouth to start whining again, but Jimin and Tae were faster and stopped you by dropping a steaming portion on your plate.

“Eat. You don’t want to overwork yourself, don’t you?” encouraged Jimin with a caring look. You reluctantly looked at the bowl he nudged in front of you.

“And if you faint, you will forget all the progress you have made, and you will be back to step one,” mocked Yoongi with his nose still in his plate. You rolled your eyes at his remark but still felt a pang of stress from the thought. 

“Funny, but seriously," You started getting up. "One more time, and I’ll-”                                                                                                                                                   

You were cut short by a pretty mad Jungkook as he reached for your wrist across the table. 

“If you get up one more time before you’ve eaten all of this goddamn plate. I will tie you down to this chair and feed you each bite until you’re done, and I won’t be gentle this time.” 

He uttered his threat in a growl, and just at the thought you gave up, suddenly plopping down on your chair. Once he felt your body relaxing he let go of your hand, still looking at you, then at the bowl until you ate four big spoonfuls of the dish. Only then did he focus again on his own, going back to being the cute little bunny he was. All the other members stared silently at you guys, too shocked to say a word. Until they exploded in laughter, you and Jungkook quickly joining in. The bantering followed right after, the atmosphere finally lightening up.

“Don’t be upset Y/N. We just want you to be okay and healthy, but don’t worry we'll help you with the choreo,” assured Jimin as he stood up, finished with his plate, and encouraged you to follow through. 

“Thank you, but… I still have some food left, and I don’t want Jungkook to put his threat into execution.” 

They all laughed at your comment as the brown-eyed boy on the other side of the table shot you a huge bunny-like smile.

[twistedappletree]

Just had an ‘accidental time travel’ thought where Jin Ling and Lan Sizhui suddenly wake up in present-day China but find out it’s only them who got sent to the future

and while LSZ keeps calm and lowkey gets excited about all the new things around him, JL straight up has a mental breakdown in public and all everyone sees is some weird kid dressed in ancient clothes, strapped up with a bow and sword and curled up in a ball in the middle of the street while screaming and sobbing for his “jiujiu”

[honeylemonteaasblog]

Loved You Once

summary: Our MC, Jia, moves back to Korea after living abroad and reconnects with the boys, including Jungkook, the boy who has been in love with her since they were kids.

pairing: Jungkook x Reader (Named MC)

genre: angst, some fluff, healing

word count: 6.3 k

warning (triggers— please read them): domestic abuse, emotional abuse and manipulation, implied physical abuse, trauma, depression, talk of mental health

note: I tried to portray mental health in a real way that represented trauma and abuse without romanticizing it. I understand that parts of this may be difficult to read, but I also firmly believe that we should talk about mental health, trauma, and abuse in an effort to create safe spaces for survivors’ stories. Please let me know if anyone has advice or concerns about writing about sensitive topics. I’d love to hear it.

“Did you hear? Jia’s back.” Jungkook’s head snapped to Hoseok. It looked like the rest of the boys were also surprised. Your family had moved to the states when you were still in high school. You all had maintained your friendship for a while through excessive texting and random facetimes, but the distance made it difficult. Then, life got really busy and you all fell out of touch. Well, you fell out of touch with them; they still talked with each other.

It was something that the boys would never forgive themselves for. They had each other, but they felt like they had abandoned you. Even if that wasn’t the case and you didn’t actually blame them. The boys felt bad that they were all friends still and didn’t even know how you were doing. They don’t check in anymore. They were supposed to be your best friends, but they had done a horrible job of maintaining that relationship. However, it was also something they would never admit to each other. Mostly because they didn’t want to say it out loud. None of them had talked to you in years.

“I overheard my mom talking to her mom.” Hoseok admits. They could see the frown on his face. And they could all relate. They wish that they didn’t need to resort to overhearing their parents’ conversation to hear about their best friend’s life. Well, the girl who used to be their best friend, now they aren’t sure where they stand anymore. It’s not like they had planned on growing apart. They still cared for you. Now, it’s just… hard.

Jungkook wasn’t sure how to make sense of his emotions. Of course, the 8 of you had been best friends, but he was in love with you. He thinks that he had always loved you, even before he had realized it. But you moved away before he was able to fully understand that you were the love of his life and he would never be able to love someone else like he loves you. He’s not trying to be dramatic, he had a few girlfriends. It’s just that he quickly realized that none of them were you. You were across the ocean. Then, he remembers seeing an instagram post about an anniversary and decided that he needed to move on. You looked happy in the photo and he decided that he couldn’t threaten that by claiming that you were the love of his life. He couldn’t just barge into your life after abandoning you. It’s just, that he couldn’t get over you. How was anyone supposed to get over you?

“Maybe she’ll come to the event on Friday?” Seokjin wondered aloud. Hoseok’s family and your family were close. So, if you were back in town it made sense that you would be at the Jung family’s charity event. Your parents would be there. They just didn’t know how to prepare for seeing you. Were they supposed to act like nothing happened? Were they supposed to beg for your forgiveness and apologize profusely? It’s not like you had made an effort to maintain your friendship either. It was just… that life got busy. They would never hold that against you though. Your entire life changed. They were the ones that were supposed to keep your life stable, but they didn’t.

“I guess we will see in a few days.”

You sat in front of your vanity for a while because you couldn’t bring yourself to get up. You had already finished getting ready but you didn’t want to go down stairs because then you would have to see all the people that you had left. Your family had moved while you were in high school, but your parents moved back to Korea when you went to university. You had gotten a scholarship and didn’t want to waste it, so you stayed. It was one of the hardest decisions you had ever made. You didn’t know if you could live in the states without your family. But you were also in love, which made the decision easier though you would deny it.

You lived in the states for four years as you finished college. You had a masters program lined up but then everything went to shit— well everything was already shit, you just hadn’t realized it yet. You hated yourself for dropping out of the masters program. It had been one of the most competitive programs in the country and you just… left it. Even though you know it’s not your fault (a fact that your therapist made sure to remind you over and over until you could remind yourself), it feels like your fault. It feels like you gave up.

You blink away the tears. You had spent way to long on your make up to ruin it now. “Let’s get this over with” You mutter to yourself. You are already tired just thinking about the small talk.

To be honest, you hadn’t thought about seeing the boys. Of course they were your best friends, but now they weren’t. Unlike the boys suspected, you didn’t blame them. You had drifted away from them and you knew that they were pursuing their dreams. You would never let your problems hold them back. But that means you also hadn’t thought about seeing them. Ever since getting back you had been struggling, so no offense to the boys, but they weren’t really the priority.

You allowed yourself one deep breath before pushing the door open. The event was being held down stairs so you knew that you wouldn’t have much time to steel yourself once you left the room. You had to be prepared before you left.

The room was beautiful. It was like an extravagant ballroom fit for a gala. Hoseok’s family had gone all out this year. The doors at the back opened into a garden. You could see a beautiful water fountain out in the garden. You knew that you would spend most of the evening outside, hiding away from everything else. It’s not that you didn’t want to see anyone, it’s just that you had only gotten back a little more than a week ago. That’s not a lot of time to adjust to life in Korea again. Let alone, prepare for the Jung Family’s charity event, which was always an impressive event.

You didn’t see the boys until the event was almost over. You had been successfully hiding in the garden for most of the night. But the fountain was really beautiful so you decided to sit on one of the benches. Yoongi had seen you sitting there for a little while and decided that he had to consult the rest of his friends to decide what they should do. To decide how to approach you. What to talk about and which questions were good questions. How not to overwhelm you. They knew all of them going over at once would probably be overwhelming, but none of them would wait. They didn’t even play rock paper scissors to decide; the stakes were too high and no one wanted to risk losing.

Besides, if some people were forced to stay back, they would most likely end up watching from the bushes and that would be even more awkward when you inevitably noticed.

You looked up when you heard the footsteps approaching. Your eyes widened comically and the boys thought that you were about to begin a long rant about how everything was there fault. They really should have kept in touch just to save themselves the scolding. But you didn’t. You simply took two long strides and threw yourself into Jungkook’s arms. Jungkook easily caught you. Like the rest of them, he was surprised, but he didn’t dare not catch you. You felt Jin pat your head, ruffling your hair. You turned to glare at him, but kept your arms wrapped around Jungkook.

“Jia, it’s been so long. We’re sorry we didn’t keep in touch.” You simply waved Namjoon off, much to the boys surprise. “Life got busy.” You reply. That was the understatement of the year.

“We have plenty of time to catch up.” You reassure them, still clinging to Jungkook. Though you reluctantly pull away and put some distance between the two of you so you can hug the rest of the boys. Jungkook thought he felt physical pain when he let you go.

You always knew that Jungkook had a crush on you, and you thought it was adorable. Mostly because you thought Jungkook was adorable. When you left you had a crush on him too. The secretly-writing-in-your-diary, middle-school-love, innocent kind of crush. The one that you would never act on because it was too pure for this world. The love that you would hold on to when other boys broke your heart to prove that love really did exist. But then you had been in the States and Jungkook was here. You couldn’t let yourself be stuck on him. Then, you fell in love with another man and dreamed of marrying him and your children and a happy ever after. You dreamed of experiencing the love that you felt for Jungkook with another man. You should have noticed that first mistake, to think that that love could be replicated. None of those dreams worked out, but despite all of it, you never didn’t love Jungkook. He was your first love. Deep down, you think you’ve only loved Jungkook, but you aren’t ready to think too much about that yet.

So the rest of the night you keep your distance from Jungkook and catch up with the boys on what you’ve missed. You fill them in on some of what they’ve missed, but you decide to keep most of the shit show that is your life to yourself. It’s not that you think the boys would judge you, but some things you aren’t ready to admit out loud to anyone, not even in your room by yourself with no one else home.

When you leave the boys at the end to the night you all decide to meet the next morning at one of your favorite cafes. You used to go there multiple times a week when you all were still in high school, before you left of course.

You knew that today was going to be a hard day as soon as you woke up. The past week you had been full of energy and happiness, most of which you attribute to seeing the boys again for the first time and having your schedule packed with cafe hopping and catching up with their lives. But here you were, lying in bed with the covers pulled over your head, crying for no real reason other than that today sucks. It was only 9 in the morning. You were supposed to meet up with Jungkook, Jin, and Yoongi for brunch, but you couldn’t bring yourself to move. You wanted to curl up and die.

Are you being dramatic right now, of course. But that’s also the reality of life. Some days are harder than others. And today is one of those. Once your life went to shit and you realized the love of your life was not in fact the love of your life, there were a lot of hard days. You tried to power through them through sheer determination and will power, but quickly realized that you were too exhausted. You had been fighting to stay afloat for so long as your life tried to drown you, that you didn’t even have any fight left once you realized that you were being drowned in the first place.

It took you a while to realize, and accept, that somedays were slow days. The days when you let your self roll around in bed and cry without needing to feel guilty. The days when you ate all the chocolate in your apartment and didn’t change out of your pajamas. Honestly, there were a lot of those days.

It is admittedly harder to allow yourself those slow days when your back in Seoul, and when you have brunch plans in a couple of hours. But you are also well aware that you aren’t going to be able to show up for brunch in a few hours. It’s simply not something you have the energy to do and that’s okay. The boys will understand. They have to. If they don’t, and they aren’t able to accept this new, broken version of yourself, then you aren’t sure how your friendship will work. And you can’t lose them all over again. So, they have to understand that sometimes there are hard days and you won’t be able to make it to brunch.

You reach over to your nightstand to text the new group chat, with you and the boys. You send out a text about not being able to make it to brunch, you aren’t completely sure what to tell them and you don’t want to lie. You decide to leave it ambiguous and hope that they don’t read into it. When you sit up in bed and assess your situation, you think that your therapist would be proud of you. Recognizing your emotions. Setting boundaries. Communication.

You realize that, despite everything, you are proud of yourself.

Today’s slow day will start with a bath, you decide. And ordering pastries and coffee from your favorite cafe.

The boys are all gathered in Namjoon’s office reading your text, again.

“I’m sorry I can’t make it to brunch today. I’d love to reschedule tho. Some time later this week work?”

They had called an emergency meeting as soon as they had seen the text this morning, despite some of the boys working. They rearranged their schedules for it. They didn’t want to seem overbearing. You had just gotten back from the States. And they have been making plans with you constantly for the past week. Now that they think about it, it might have been a little overbearing. Okay, definitely overbearing.

There was something formal about your text that they couldn’t figure out. Hence the impromptu meeting. You didn’t make an excuses or claim that you were tired. You just said that you weren’t coming. Honestly, it stumped them. It made them feel like something was wrong. But they weren’t sure how to ask if something was wrong without being even more overbearing than they already were.

Hoseok had asked your parents where you were staying, claiming that they wanted to deliver some food for you. But they also didn’t want to intrude on your space. And you clearly wanted some space. They just also wanted to check on you. They needed to check on you. Ultimately, that was the deciding factor. The guilt of the past years was consuming them whole and they couldn’t bare the idea of you hurting in your apartment alone as they continued on with everyday life.

They decided on Jungkook heading over to your apartment to check on you. If anyone was going to get through to you, it’d be Jungkook. And if anyone needed to see you and make sure you were okay, it’d be Jungkook.

Jungkook got to your apartment before you had time to order from the cafe which would have been bad because you really wanted coffee and a chocolate croissant. But Jungkook brought coffee and a chocolate croissant.

You still made him sit on the couch until you had drank half the coffee. And he was happy to wait, he thought that you looked like you needed the coffee. It made Jungkook happy that he was the one to bring you the coffee.

You looked exhausted. He could see bags under your eyes but he couldn’t tell if they were from last night or it was the first time he was seeing you without makeup since you had gotten back. You were wearing a sweatshirt and baggy sweatpants that seemed to be swallowing you whole. You looked really comfortable. And cute. Like really cute, but in a way that made Jungkook want to pull you into his arms and cuddle with you for the rest of eternity kind of way.

“Why did you come?” You didn’t bother asking how he knew where you lived, you knew your parents would’ve provided the information easily. They adored the seven boys who both protected and comforted you throughout your childhood. Jungkook watches you with careful eyes considering your reaction. He doesn’t see any anger.

“You look exhausted.” Jungkook didn’t really mean to say that, but he couldn’t help himself. “Are you sleeping okay?” He is suddenly overcome with guilt. The boys had wanted to make up for the past, they had wanted to learn about your life without them, and they had wanted to share their lives with you. Suddenly, Jungkook wasn’t sure if that was the right choice. They should’ve let you settle in and get adjusted to life in Seoul, rather than drag you around where they wanted to go. They shouldn’t have pushed so hard.

You laugh a little, breaking Jungkook out of his mental spiral. Guilt can do that to you, especially when it’s a little misplaced.

“I am, but that’s why I’m in Seoul. Right?” Your voice is firm, but vulnerable. Jungkook wants to push because he wants to understand what that means. Were you not sleeping well in the States? When he looks into your eyes he sees a vulnerability that tells him not to push you. So, he holds his tongue and instead reaches over and pulls you closer into his side.

“Then let’s rest.” Jungkook doesn’t leave room for your protests. But when he glances down at you, he doesn’t think you were ever going to. You simply burrow into the couch more and suggest that Jungkook turn a show on.

By the end of the first episode, you are asleep and Jungkook is smiling.

This is what the boys should have been doing, even well you were so far away. They should have found a way to comfort you, even when you didn’t ask for it. Especially when you didn’t ask for it. They should have showed up for you, both metaphorically but also literally. Why hadn’t they ever visited you?

The next few weeks are slower. You and the boys still go to brunch and try as many new cafes as you can. You still learn about each other’s lives and introduce each other to the new parts of yourself. You can tell that they care. It’s just like how they used to be: a perfect mix of protective and caring while creating space for you to be the person you want to be.

There are moments, mostly in the middle of the night when you can’t sleep, that you think about how they stopped reaching out after you went to the states. But even in those moments you scold yourself. Life was changing for all of you. You never wanted to blame them for your friendship falling apart.

More often than you would want to admit, you think about the man that you loved, the man who broke your heart and tore you apart. You wonder what the boys would have thought of you if they saw that. A part of you wanted them to rescue you. Another part of you was glad that they weren’t there. That they never saw how much power you gave to someone else and how he used it break everything you loved about yourself. He turned you against yourself.

You fell in love with a man who seems so perfect. It wasn’t until you had been dating for over a year and moved in together that you realized he wasn’t perfect. Rather he was an angry drunk. You knew that he was under a lot of stress with work and you liked to think that he loved you, but the more rational part of your brain also knew that you didn’t deserve to treated like that. No one did.

It’s a shame that it’s really hard to leave a relationship with someone who tells you that they love you. It’s really hard to leave a relationship with someone when you live with them and the rest of your family is an ocean away. And it’s really hard to leave a relationship when they apologize every time that they hurt you and promise that they will never do it again.

The longer you stayed, the harder it became. You started to think about how everyone would be disappointed that you hadn’t left the first time he put his hands on you. You started to think about how this is all your fault, and that you should have know better.

It wasn’t until you called a crisis text line in the middle of the night when he was on a work trip that you started to realize how wrong he was. You were under the blankets like someone was going to hear you. You didn’t tell them what was going on because you didn’t want it to be real, but it was the first time in years— since the boys— that someone just listened to you. That someone wanted to hear how you were doing and what they could do to help make life, even a little bit, easier.

After that call you started online therapy. It took a little bit until you found the right therapist for you, but when you did, you both just clicked. Within a few sessions you had spilled your story to her and despite all of your worries she didn’t blame you. She told you how strong you are. She told you that you were never the one to blame. She told you that he is the one at fault. Over the course of the following weeks she helped you move out and build a new foundation. She helped you reframed your thoughts so you weren’t blaming yourself for things that weren’t your fault and could recognize that no one should treat someone so horribly. That he is responsible for his actions. And possibly the hardest thing to recognize, that no matter what he told you what he felt for you wasn’t love. It was in those dark moments that you thought about Jungkook. You clung to those feelings and promised yourself that that was what love felt like.

And slowly, so slowly, you rebuilt your life. Then you moved back to Seoul because you couldn’t bear to be in the same city as that man. You never pursued any legal action, you were too exhausted. But you also knew that you’d likely be fighting a losing battle. You could tell your therapist wanted to hurt the man and see him in jail, but didn’t voice her opinions because ultimately they didn’t matter. Only your opinions mattered. You were the one who got to make decisions about your life.

Now back with the boys and in a city that you once loved, you are starting to feel better. You aren’t naive enough to think that your healed, in fact you think that you are broken, but you are no longer blaming yourself for being broken. There is something beautiful in being broken. At least that what you try to convince yourself.

You rush around your apartment, shoving things into closets and preparing for the boys who are coming in a few minutes. It will be the first time that all of the boys are coming over to your apartment together. You decided that you would host a dinner. It had been a month since you had gotten back to Seoul and you wanted to thank them for being there for you— even if they didn’t realize how much it meant to you.

When the door bell rings, you hesitate. You know it’s not true, but you can’t help but think that they will find something missing or think that you’re inadequate. You think that there will always be that little voice in your head that sounds like him. You shake your head and go to the door. You’d rather hear their voices.

Jungkook is standing there holding a bottle of wine. But Taehyung shoves the man out of the way at the last minute to pull you into a hug. Jungkook scowls and starts muttering threats. Hoseok slaps him on the shoulder before pulling you in for a hug, which makes you giggle. The boys immediately shut up and watch.

They love it when you laugh.

The dinner had been perfect and you were all sitting in front of the tv for a mario cart tournament when your phone rang. You didn’t think about it when you answered. That was your first mistake. You had gotten so used to the boys calling you. And if it wasn’t them it was probably your parents. They loved having you back in Seoul. They had missed you so much after they moved back to Seoul from the States.

“Jia.” His voice cut through the phone and it made you still. When you think back to this moment you won’t be able to help being a little disappointed in yourself. You had put so much work into getting better and into becoming stronger. Yet, all it took was one word to send you right back into that old version of yourself. The version that thought that what he felt for you was love. That’s what trauma does to you. No matter how much healing you do, you often can’t help some things from triggering you. You can’t always stop something having power over you. One day you will make sure that this man never holds any power over you, but until then you’ll always be scared of him.

The boys are so caught up in the race that they don’t realize. They will blame themselves for not realizing sooner, but how were they supposed to look out for something that they didn’t know was a threat.

You didn’t say anything, not to the boys and certainly not to him. Instead you stood up and shot the boys a little smile and walked to the balcony. You closed the door behind you and sunk into a chair. The boys that had seen the smile began to worry, it was their first warning, but they weren’t sure what to make of it. They weren’t sure how to help you.

“You left.” The anger in his voice startles you. It shouldn’t have. “You didn’t even say goodbye. I came home and you were gone. How could you do this to me!” You knew he didn’t actually want you to answer the question so you stayed quiet. You kept reminding yourself everything that your therapist had told you. You kept reminding yourself of everything that you told yourself in the mirror at night when the nightmares were particularly bad.

He was talking, but you weren’t listening. You hung up the phone. Even if you weren’t listening to him, you didn’t want to hear his voice anymore. There was a moment of panic after the line went dead that you were worried about what you had done. That you worried about what he would do to you. Then you looked around to remind yourself that you weren’t in the states anymore. You were in Seoul. He couldn’t hurt you anymore. You wouldn’t let him.

You started to laugh. It was a broken laugh that portrayed just how much that phone call had hurt you. The kind of laugh that screamed pain and trauma. But it felt so good. He had called you, ranting about who knows what, and you had just hung up. You hadn’t said a single word to the man and truthfully, he didn’t deserve anything. Despite all of the pain and knowing that the next few days were going to be hard days, you felt like you had taken back a little piece of your power. You had stripped him of his voice, just like he had taken yours. You had silenced him.

When the laughing stopped, the crying began. But this time it felt different. It didn’t feel like the world was ending, it felt like you were being reborn. You were mourning over something that had happened, rather than crying over something that was happening to you.

The boys sat there watching you cry. They had never felt so lost, so helpless. They wanted to fix it, but they didn’t know what happened or where to start. So they just stood there. Some of them were crying out of frustration and helplessness. Others had a heartbreaking, blank look to mask everything that they were feeling.

Yoongi turned to Jungkook. “Help her. Tell her that you love her and support her through whatever just happened.” Then he turned to the others and told them to get out. You didn’t need an audience. Besides, Jungkook would be able to help you.

If nothing else, Yoongi was sure of that. Jungkook would do anything you needed.

The boys shuffled out of the apartment, tossing worried looks in your direction, but when Yoongi leveled them with a glare they started moving. Some of them looked like they wanted to argue, but Yoongi again just glared at them and they accepted defeat. Yoongi is a difficult man to argue with.

Jungkook didn’t ask what was wrong. He wrapped you in his arms and took you inside. Then, he held you close until you stopped crying. By that time you were asleep and his shirt was wet. He held you close as you slept, afraid that if he let go you might start crying again. He held you close even after he fell asleep, his body intuitively knew that he never wanted to let go ever again.

When he woke up again, you were still asleep so he continued to hold you in his arms.

And when you woke up, you snuggled deeper into his chest. You felt him laugh which made you laugh too. “Are you okay?” His voice was deep, like he had just woken up and it made you want to look up and see what his hair looked like in the morning. But you stayed snuggled into his chest instead, not wanting to meet his eyes.

You nodded, but apparently that want enough for him because he pulled you up so he could see and asked again.

“Yeah, I’m feeling better.”You hesitated, but Jungkook could tell you wanted to say something so he stayed quiet and let you think. “I know that you want to know what happened, but I’m not ready to talk about it.”

“Okay.” He didn’t look mad and that made you relax a little. “But whenever you’re ready. Any of us would be privileged to hear. We’re all here for you.”

“Why do you care?” It’s not that you didn’t know. You know that Jungkook loves you. You know that you love Jungkook, but there was that part of you that would never believe him until he said it out loud. And despite everything that you had gone through you wanted to believe it.

You had mourned the girl who lost everything in the states. You had mourned the girl that believed love was apologies and flowers to make up for missing your anniversary rather than for your anniversary. So, you were ready to move on and experience everything that love actually was. Doesn’t mean it didn’t terrify you though.

“I love you.” Jungkook’s voice was strong. A true declaration. “And I know that you love me too.”

“I can’t Jungkook.” God, it was everything you wanted to hear, but it also hurt to hear it. Because you were selfish. You wanted Jungkook to love you because you wanted to experience that love. Yet you also weren’t sure if you could say it back despite how you felt. The last time you told a man that you loved him, he explained that you loved too much. That it felt suffocating and you needed to be less. When you had cried he kissed you softly and apologized for being too harsh, stating that he had forgotten how soft you were. It had been a sugarcoated insult, and one you hadn’t noticed at the time because you were so desperate for affection. You had wanted him to love you so much that you missed the toxicity underneath his false apologies.

Jungkook makes a distressed noise and holds you tighter as he watches you spiral. “I can’t.” Your voice cracked, but neither of you moved. You couldn’t bring yourself to move and Jungkook didn’t want to move until he understood what you were telling him, but his heart was breaking because of how broken you sounded.

“I don’t want to love anyone again. I’ve always gotten hurt. And…” You hesitated because it was painfully to recall the words that had been thrown in your face. “My love is a burden. I am a burden.” You tore your eyes away from Jungkook, finding the floor because you were too humiliated to look at him. So, you didn’t see the devastation that crossed his face. You didn’t see the tears that welled up in Jungkook’s eyes when he realized what you were saying. He could tell that a part of you believed it and that was utterly devastating to Jungkook, it felt like he had just gotten punched in the gut.

You tried to get out of Jungkook’s arm, but he just held you closer. You started to feel like you were drowning in your own selfishness. You wanted to hear this and yet now you can’t face it. You had practically begged him to say it. You’ve never hated yourself more.

Just moments earlier you thought that you were ready, but now that the moments come you don’t feel ready at all. It’s cruel, but its true. Everyone feels prepared until you’re faced with it. It’s easier to feel ready compared to actually being ready.

“You aren’t a burden.” Jungkook tilted your face up so that he could see your eyes. He wanted to make sure that you were hearing him. You had this unbelievably annoying tendency to avoid all reassurance because self doubt was easier. That’s something many people may not realize. Some people have struggled for so long that they have normalized all their negative thoughts and that they are too scared to deviate from their normal, even for reassurance.

It was one of the main things that you were working on with your therapist before you left to Seoul.

You search Jungkook’s eyes for doubt or malice or literally anything that will reaffirm your own belief that while the world is a cruel place, people are even crueler. Deep down you know that you wouldn’t find any, not with Jungkook. But a part of you wants to be able to see that Jungkook is lying because then you could make yourself walk away and protect your heart, even though it may be from love. But instead you are stuck here looking at him. You find that you are wanting to believe him. You want him to be telling the truth because you don’t want to feel sad anymore.

That scares you more than anything else.

“You aren’t a burden.” Jungkook repeats his words because he can tell that your mind is beginning to get distracted and he really wants you to hear him. His hands cradle your face, softly rubbing your cheeks as you look up at him. It’s like he think that if he touches you with enough softness it may weaken your defenses enough to see how to fix everything. Even though deep down, he knows that this isn’t something that he can simply fix for you. It doesn’t mean he doesn’t want to.

You don’t know what to say to him. You’ve never heard someone tell you that you aren’t a burden. You aren’t sure what is expected of you. But then again, you think that is what he is trying to tell you. That there aren’t any expectations. There is no right way to respond. All of your possible responses are right. So you take the leap of faith.

You press your lips to his, trying to say everything that you don’t know how to vocalize. You don’t know how to say what you are thinking. You don’t even know what you are thinking, but you trust that Jungkook will be able to get the message. And he does because one hand slips to your waist, holding you even closer. You hadn’t thought that was possible.

You break away first, a shy smile on your lips and flushed cheek. He loves how close you both are. He loves that he can see the vulnerability in your eyes. It’s the first time since you were children that you are letting him in.

“I love you.” Your voice is soft, but it holds this sharpness to it that lets him know how serious you are. You never thought you’d ever be able to say that again. It isn’t just a declaration to Jungkook, but it’s also your own little act of defiance to your past self who thought that you would never recover. It’s defiance to the last man to hold your heart. The man who no longer owns any part of your heart.

“I’m sorry I didn’t see it sooner.” You murmur, unable to prevent yourself from apologizing. Jungkook understands, so he simply kisses the apology away. “I love you.”

“I love you so much.”

[ravenesse]

Borrowed Stars — Chapter 18 🤍

Summary:

“But this is normal, Seokjin assumes."

[jichanxo]

can't hold it in

[jungkookslipring]

I think you should know you saved my life

Pairings: Jimin x reader

Relationship: Platonic

Genre: Hurt/Comfort

TW: mentions of c0vid, depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts

AU: this was written so fast in such a short amount of time but it was what I was feeling in my heart. I apologize if there is any misspelling or repetitiveness. They truly got me through the roughest time in my life, and if I could tell them this face-to-face, I would. As always, be safe out there, sending all the love and hugs, and I can't wait for 2025.

"Remember there is a person here in Korea, in the city of Seoul, who understands you."

-Jimin

Nothing could have prepared anyone for what happened three years ago. Nothing could've prepared you for the sadness, fear, anxiety, loneliness, anger, and mental/physical toll it would take on you and your loved ones, making you feel 20,000x worse because they were going through it too.

Now that the world was in its current season, you couldn't help but look back at where you were when it all started. It was truly the lowest point of your life. You couldn't have felt any lower than that season of your life. Life also didn't prepare you for the blessing it would send you. Well, more like seven blessings.

Your wave of emotions hit you so randomly. You were watching a movie in your room when everything hit you all at once. The familiar stinging behind your eyes were not tears of sadness but tears of gratefulness. They didn't burn as much, but were quick to build before they would flow out of your eyelids. You couldn't help the sob that escaped your lips, and before you knew it you were throwing the blanket off of your body, in need of finding the person who was making you feel this way.

You pulled open your door and before you could run out, you were face to face with the angel who got you through it all.

Jimin looked at you, eyes wide with concern. Before he could say anything, you threw your arms around him, burying your face into his shoulder. Jimin was quick to engulf you into a tight hug.

"Hey hey hey whats wrong? Whats got our y/n so sad?" he asked gently. You shook in his hold while he walked you back into your room.

"Lets sit down, try to catch our breath okay?" he said calmly. He held you so safe and securely in his arms, your heart rate was calming down just a little.

"I-I just- you-"

"Shh shh shh shh let's try to calm down first y/n, we don't need you passing out on us okay?" he whispered into your hair, rubbing one hand up and down your back while the other held the back of your head. You sat there as small sobs wracked your body and tears plopped on Jimin's shirt. After a few minutes you calmed down a little more, Jimin never stopping the motions on your head and back.

"Do you feel a little better?" he asked wiping at your cheeks with his thumb. You nodded as you let out a sigh.

"What's got you feeling this way, sweetie?" he asked kindly. You shook your head, trying to keep the oncoming tears at bay.

"I'm just so thankful for you," you whisper, biting your lip.

"Aww y/n I'm thankful for you too," he said with a warm smile. His eyes filled with concern as you shook your head and moisture pooled your eyelids again.

"Y/n..." he whispered.

"Three years ago I was so lost. I was not in a good place, I wasn't happy, I hated my life, I hated myself, I started to believe there was no light at the end of the tunnel. My heart hurt every day. I felt like I had nothing to look forward to, nothing to get me through the day, nothing to bring me any sense of comfort or happiness. I was drowning in everything that was happening and I was letting whatever dark power is out there get a hold of me because I had nothing left in me," you say thickly as the tears started falling.

"But then I met all of you. All seven of you pulled me out of the dark hole that was swallowing me up. When I had no more fight in me you let me know it was okay and you got me out. You helped me find happiness, you helped me smile more, laugh more, and live more. I wouldn't physically be here if it wasn't for you. You saved me in more ways than you could ever know, and I don't know how to repay you or thank you properly for all that you've done..." you finish before wailing into Jimin's shoulder. The arms wrapped around you tightened enough to be comforting and grounding. Jimin shushed you gently as he swallowed the lump in his throat. He pulled you further into his hold and up onto the bed to where you two were lying down. You had to get everything out because you didn't think he realized all that he had done for you, but little did you realize all that you had done for him.

"Thank you for saving my life," you whisper when you feel your eyes drooping. Jimin placed a kiss on your head, tears falling from his eyes as he whispered

"Thank you for saving mine."

taglist: @felixmainacc @felixburneracc @myforevermelody143 @dunno-wut-to-do

[theinfinitedivides]

so much for not writing the fic

[haruhar-u]

I’m Tired Of Always Chasin’, Chasin’ After You

-1117 words

Xiyao modern au, hurt no comfort

AO3 upload

TWS: breakups, overall angst, cursing

A/N: they may be out of character as this is my first time writing for this fandom

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･**･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'･

Lan Xichen was always slow to anger. He always had control over his temper. Whenever pissed, he always would remove himself from the situation; making sure to take a breath of fresh air. The only time he remembers actually losing it was at his brother’s husband but those two are happily married now and recently adopted a son. However, his boyfriend, Jin Guangyao, was close to pushing him over. He slept in his office instead of coming back to their shared apartment at night. The actions he took in his plot to climb the ranks at his company hurt everyone Jin Guangyao Yao was close to. His brother, father, mentor, and friends all cut ties with him. The only one who didn’t was Lan Xichen. 

Xichen wanted to give his A-Yao a chance, really he really did. However, the trust that was the glue between the two was weakening to the point where it might as well have fully dissolved into nothing. Was there really nothing between the two left? Xichen didn’t want to believe that. Surely the blossoms of his love for A-Yao were still in full bloom and hadn't withered and expired yet. 

He invited A-Yao out to their favourite cafe. It was where they had their first date and where A-Yao asked him out before that. It was a high tea place with exquisite china cups and teapots. On the platter placed in the middle of the table, there was an assortment of different cakes, macaroons, and other small baked goods. 

Xichen was surprised that this date could even happen. A-Yao was so concerned with his job that they had to reschedule multiple times because he worked too late or took on another project, pushing their date further and further back. Sometimes he even forgot to show up, leaving Xichen at the place alone. They were only able to go out today because Xichen quite literally chased after him to remind him. Xichen had this thought that occasionally popped into his mind. What if A-Yao didn’t give a fuck about their relationship anymore. Xichen knew this was an intrusive thought and tried to push it away. 

“What’s been keeping you busy?” Xichen asked him.

“I’ve received an anonymous letter detailing Qin Su.” A-Yao replied, cutting a piece of cake on his plate.

“A letter? About your assistant?”

“Former assistant, and no, not completely ” A-Yao corrected. Former? He fired her? A-Yao loved his assistant and would always sing praise about her over text, phone, and in person to Xichen. Why would he fire her?

“Not completely?” Xichen asks, confused. 

Complete and utter silence from A-Yao.

“Please answer me.”

“They threatened me. They told me that all my secrets would be released unless I fired A-su.” He muttered, avoiding eye contact with Xichen. “They wanted her fired because they felt I only hired her because of nepotism.” 

Xichen let out a sigh of disappointment. “A-Yao, what if they didn’t even have your secrets? Then, you just hurt your sister for nothing.” 

“Babe, I had no choice! What if they did know? Then what would I have done if they were released?”

“Did you want to fire her?” 

“No! Like I said, I didn't really have a choice. Maybe they were right, maybe it was nepotism.” 

“How could you not have a choice. She was your assistant, a part of your branch at work. Besides, if you felt it was nepotism, why would you hire her in the first place?” Xichen scolded 

“I-I was pressured into it by my father a few years ago.”

Xichen settled down. “I see.” 

“I was just scared this person would just reveal the fact that I got my father and brother fired just last year..” 

“You what?” 

A-Yao looks him dead in the eye, pleadingly his voice shaking. “I-I felt I had to. But, babe, you don’t have to worry. You know I’d never hurt you, right?” 

Xichen snaps at him, standing up and putting his hands down on the table, gaining attention from everyone else around. “You said you loved her. You say you love me, but how do I know that? How do I know you’re not just using me?! I just wish you’d thought things through before I you know, fell in love with you?” Fuck. Xichen can’t take that back. He does admit that he wanted to confront him about that. Not like that, though. He wanted to ask him about his worries, have A-Yao comfort him, and then tell him it’s okay and he won’t have to worry. Xichen fucked that up. That won’t ever happen. Especially considering Meng Yao’s reaction. His eyes widen, he mumbles something that looks somewhat like an apology, rummages through his wallet, leaves money to pay, and then he runs. Xichen felt he should chase after him and say he’s sorry, so he’s not the one who got away. But he can’t. He feels glued to his seat. 

After a while and a very concerned waiter who went by the name Wen Ning from his name tag asking if he’s okay, Xichen decides he’ll go home, apologize to Meng Yao, and maybe they can move past this like nothing happened? He leaves money to pay for his portion of the bill and spends what feels like forever on public transit. 

Once he unlocks the door, His apartment looks more desolate, as if something were missing. The grey colour palette looks more hostile. It reminded him of when he and A-Yao discussed painting the walls and agreed their landlord would have their heads. He walks into their bedroom when he finally notices it:All of A-Yao’s stuff is just gone, as if it were reduced to nothing by ashes. He found a note tied to a bouquet of hyacinths and rue...hyacinths and rue? Xichen wasn’t very well versed in flower language; that’s something he’d have to ask his brother-in-law about. He decided to read the note.

To my dearest Xichen,

I really cherished every moment we spent together. However, I realized I really treated you like shit. As if I didn’t give a fuck about you and as if I was only using you for protection against my father and for your status as a Lan. Towards the end of our relationship, I couldn’t give you what you deserved, and I didn’t communicate well enough with you. I want you to know I really give a fuck about you. I love you, and for that reason, I’m killing our relationship. Despite you telling me you’d die for me at one point, I feel you’re better off without me. I bid you well, my love. 

With regret,

Jin Guangyao

[wangxianficrecs]

Young Madam Jin by StarClearWaters (Readoutloud)

Young Madam Jin

by StarClearWaters (Readoutloud)

G, 5k, Wangxian

Summary: “Jiejie, I thought he had killed you!” “A-Cheng, what do you mean? A-Xian didn’t hurt me. I was protecting him. It was not his fault. It was my choice” A stupid ridiculous choice. She knows now just how she had been used. Kay's comments: This story was a super cool read and I loved this portrayal of Jiang Yanli! I loved to see her live (longer) and I really loved the time travel, though it caught me completely off-guard because I didn't read the tags before :D I think Yanli should be allowed to go apeshit more often actually. Excerpt: “They were Wen-” “They were the ones A-Xian owed his and your life to. And A-Xian’s A-Yuan, was he not a child? When we went to Yiling, did he not tell us stories? Does killing war orphans and refuges make us better than the Wen. Do you feel better now A-Cheng?” Jiang Cheng does not say anything, I can see he wants to yell and scream at me, but this at least he can't bring himself to do. Maybe it is because I have not raised my voice, or maybe it is that I look a little too much like mother. “Was it Jealousy again A-Cheng? Did you let others guide you to hate him, like mother did?”

pov jiang yanli, canon divergence, temporary character death, jiang yanli lives, time travel, time travel fix-it, bamf jiang yanli, jiang yanli/jin zixuan, hurt/comfort, grief/mourning, jiang family dynamics, cloud recesses study arc, cold springs cave, marriage proposal, shameless lan wangji

~*~

(Please REBLOG as a signal boost for this hard-working author if you like – or think others might like – this story.)

[kanene-yaaay]

The Only One Monster

Kanene's Notes: I started to write this fic like oiuygtfrdfghj an month ago and completely forgot about it as it was burried in my drafts so that is the fun fact of today kjhgfghjkl This was not written for Jiang Cheng's birthday but it is a convinient time so. :D

Warnings: None. Only Familial tickles, since I know some aren't comfortable with that. Around 2.500 words (probably? I forgot to check). Ticklish Jin Ling and Ler Jiang Cheng. A tiny little bit of angst and hurt/comfort.

[~*~]

"Hush, now. Enough." Even in a harsh tone Jiang Cheng brought the kid closer to his chest, heart tearing and brittling with each sniffle. "It's just a nightmare. Is that the behavior of a future sect leader?"

"Jiujiu, stop." His voice was low, so different from his usual snarking words, who would never run out of cutting words, matching him complaint from complaint, shout to shout. Hearing it, Jiang Cheng froze before pulling his nephew even closer, curling all around him as if he could protect them from the world.

He slowly rocked them from one side to another, a hand rubbing his back lightly, just like his jiejie used to do when they were kids and Jiang Cheng ran to her with tears in his eyes. So alike their little A-Ling now. Pressing his lips to the top of his head, the adult held a sigh.

His sister would know what to say in his place. She would comfort with touches soft and caring, with a smile so brilliant that made everything vanish in the pure light of it, so truthful and caring that would leave you wanting to smile too. Jiang Yanli would never say such cutting words, never made her own son sound so small, even if he was (already) almost hitting his shoulder.

But since she wasn't here anymore, he would be. With a too broad hug and a thougher touch, with a lotus pork rib soup that didn't taste the same, with the same lullaby she sang to them with a much rougher voice and all the sharp edges he kept turning and twisting away from his dear waisheng who deserved more than the harsh words of his fool jiujiu.

"What can those dreams even do to you now, brat?" He scoffed, and maybe it was the sleepness of being woken in the middle of the night, of having his entire family in his arms, but his words were softer, the memories of his sister much less hurting than the usual. "Can they hurt you here? Is there anywhere safer than Lotus Pier?"

Jin Ling sniffed and bright, teary eyes turning to look at him, getting away from his chest just enough to do so. "But what if they get in, jiujiu?"

Jiang Cheng grinned and let Zidian send unharming and bright purple sparkles across his arms, in the exact same way that would make A-Ling as a baby squeal and try to chew the ring. Nowadays there was no chewing, but the growing young still stared at it reluctantly amazed. "Let them come, A-Ling, and they will be the example why no one dares to challenge the Yunmeng Jiang Clan nor my family."

With his sleeve (the robe was already ruined anyway) he cleaned the tears and snot, pinching Jin Ling's nose lightly, putting him immediately back to the scowling and trying to push him away with a whine.

"Jiujiu! Weren't you just talking about protecting me?" A knee found a way to the bottom of his ribs and Jiang Cheng very much gracefully did not send the boy back to his room for the disrespect. "Don't complain when I decide to not come here if I need you again!"

Jiang Cheng scowled.

"It's that so? See if I'll try to protect you from the monsters next time you come banging at my door in the middle of the night."

Jin Ling harrumphed exactly like his father used to when they're both teenagers and went back to lay on his chest, burrowing in the warmth as the adult rolled his eyes and laid a hand on his back, rubbing it softly, making him melt even more on the embrace. Both knew he would never have the heart to send him away, night, morning or any other moment.

Sleepness began taking over them, laying as an extra cover over them and Jiang Cheng barely heard his next words, even with his enhanced hearing.

"Jiujiu, is there a monster you've never been able to defeat?"

Way too many memories flashed in his eyes, of darker times and too many battles he could've never won and suddenly a spark of anger flashed in him, wishing nothing more than to push it and them all  the away from him. Wasn’t his efforts enough? What did Jin Ling begging doubting him now? 

But then there was a memory, that only exhaustion could bring with so much softness and so little grief. 

Yanli smiling, a hint of mischievousness in her eyes that only made his curiosity burn brighter as she let go of his bandaged hand and got closer to his ear, whispering: "There is a monster here in Lotus Pier, A-Cheng, one that not even A-Niang or A-Die could win against."

At the time, he gasped and widened his eyes, appalled by this very idea. Their parents were giants, with unending power that was above anything, untouchables, undefeatables. "Not even with Zidian?"

"Not even with Zidian, until today, no one can even approach it in combat without getting caught by its claws."

Jiang Cheng gasped and held her hand, trying to pull her closer, behind him. "I will get him, jiejie! You don't need to worry because I will win. I will."

There was a chuckle behind him, both fond and playful. "You're very brave, A-Cheng. Do you really want to face it?"

"I want! I will protect us, jiejie!"

And his voice, as it always did, was already leaving his mouth before he could even think about it. "There is one."

Jin Ling froze in his arms, face quickly turning up to face him, eyes wide. Jiang Cheng simply stared impassively back. "There is?!"

"Yes. It's an old monster that wanders across the humans and lands, with the power to possess people. Many families have been attacked by it and many other will fallen victims in the future. There isn't a single disciple from the biggest or tiniest sects or villagers and towns in the cultivation world that haven't heard about it." He stopped, narrowed his eyes and frowned in a thoughtful expression. "Maybe the Lans, living all the way up in the mountains with their thousands of rules."

(Somewhere, in Gusu Lan, Wangji sneezed, stopping momentarily his meditation and using the opportunity of distraction to help his son keep being awake for the lesson, softening at those bright giggles he continued to let out.)

"It can be here in Lotus Pier, too?"

"It already is."

"What?! Right now?!"

"Yes, I said. Are you becoming deaf at such a young age?"

"More like you're becoming crazy with old age! You're making no sense! How can a monster be here and no one is doing anything about it?"

"I truly must be getting crazy. I just now imagined that my waisheng decided to be disrespectful, forgetting the education I gave him and is asking for me to break his legs."

Said waisheng scowled at him, as if he was being unreasonable. "Jiujiu, there is no time to joke. If Lotus Pier is being targeted then I can help, I will grab Suihua and-"

"It's here." Before the younger could move, Jiang Cheng locked his arms around him, words grave. "It just got into the room."

"It WHAT?" Jin Ling clued on him, voice high and scared, hands gripping his robes so tightly that for a ke Jiang Cheng almost lost his façade by snorting, only being saved by Jin Ling who kept staring at every wall and object with growing alarm.

"Yes." And before anything else could be said, Jiang Cheng burrowed his hands on the back of the boy's ribs, wincing at the shriek it resulted. In a neutral voice, he continued. "Oh no, A-Ling, it got you."

"Wha-! J-J-JIHIHIHIUJIHIU!" Jiang Cheng began tazing his ribcage and he squealed, falling into an uncontrollable giggling fit as those dancing fingers scribbled over each bone and poked the space in between them, focusing on those awfully ticklish spots that always made his giggles higher and louder. "W-whahahahahaha-ack! Whahahat is thihihihis!"

"The tickle monster, obviously." Jiang Cheng was helpless for the grin that suddenly pulled on his lips at the sound of that laughter, strident and unstoppable, chasing away any cold from the night. Jin Ling began shaking his head and flailing around like a fish, squirming for freedom. Instead of that, however, he only managed to lift his arms enough for the other to start attacking it with scratches and prodding, snorts taking over the laughter as he decided to lightly dig on it. “Didn’t I just tell you? That is the only monster I can’t save you from.”

“NohohohohoHOHOHOT-” The loud giggling became a shrill when Jiang Cheng started to drum the center of his armpit restlessly with his thumbs, the other free fingers lightly wiggling on his ribs once more. “NOHOHOHOHOT A MONSTER! Eek!! JIUJIU!”

“It is.” Freeing his hands he began spidering and skittering his fingers all across his back, increasing all his squirming and wiggling around tenfold, the cackling laughter giving space to a snickering, giggly and squeaky chuckle, better for breathing. “What do you think then, A-Ling? You offered to help, do you think you can defeat it?”

“Ihihihihihihit’s yohohohohu! Snk! Yohohohou!!”

There was a spot on the back, right next to his sides, that would make Jin Ling squeal and guffaw like crazy, leaving even his ears as red as his vermillion mark with how much he was laughing. Jiang Cheng wasted no time before concentrating in scribbling and squeezing every single inch of that spot over and over and over again, summoning the laughter to fill the air with mirth.

“Is it?”

At the answering nods from the kid - his smile so big and bright and so, so similar to his jiejie that Jiang Cheng almost teared up - Jiang Cheng stopped his tickles, letting his hands rest on his sides. For the way Jin Ling kept snickering and jolting from side to side every time his fingers did much as lightly, just barely, almost not touching, claw at it, the ghost tickles were probably running wild at his nerves. 

He let him get enough gulps of air, those shiny eyes looking back at him with a mix of anticipation and joy, so much different from half shichen ago. 

“So it is me, then. I might as well change my question in this case.” Jiang Cheng let out an evil smirk, chuckling slowly and lowly. “Do you think you can defeat your jiujiu, A-Ling?”

With a sudden move, lifted the boy (lately he had been claiming to be ‘too old’ for this and the sect leader was secretly happy at the opportunity) who screamed bloody murder (what a dramatic brat) and immediately began kicking and throwing himself in high pitched crackles as Jiang Cheng decided to actually claw at his sides, actually getting hit on his chest twice (the disrespect) before shoving his head on his stomach and blowing a raspberry at it.

“EEEEEEEEEEEEHEHEHEHEHEHE NOOOOOHOHOHO! GEHEHEHET OOHOHOHOHOHOUT!” Jin Ling felt his eyes close, entire body buzzing with the tickles, snorts, squeals and screech falling from his mouth with no hope of being held back, head throwing backward with the force of his laughter, trashing and squirming around by instinct while holding his jiujiu’s hands in a firm grip. He shrieked when he was moved again, now resting on his lap, almost not listening to the (so rare and delightful) playful voice making his smile grow even bigger. “YOHOHOHOU’RE BEING MEHEHEHEAN! BAHAHAHAHAD JIUJIHIHIHIHIU!!”

Jiang Cheng scoffed in unbelief. “What am I now, Fairy?” Suddenly he grinned again and Jin Ling squealed again in anticipation, trashing more. “The nerve. Actually, I should warn the servants to not bring me my breakfast this morning. Tiny brats who refuse to show any respect are my favorite meal.”

“BAHAHAHAHAHAD JIUJIU! BAHAHAHAHAD!”

The raspberries stopped and Jin Ling took a few giggling breaths before he felt one of the hands on his grip moving.

“Nohohohoho,” he snickered, eyes still closed, trying to pull those hands back into a hug or anything that would stop it from going to the next target. A wiggling finger lightly tickling his armpit quickly weakened his hold, however, and soon that hand was snatching his ankle, making him do a half spin on Jiang Cheng’s legs. “Thihihihihis not ahahahaha fair fihight!” 

“Oh, so if it was a fair fight you think you would win?”

“I would!” Especially because his jiujiu would never try to hurt him, so he was technically right. “Yohohu’re getting ohold!”

“You-!” There came the affronted voice that made him snicker for another unrelated to tickly reasons. “You’re literally begging me to go for the legs.”

And suddenly everything made sense. Unfortunately it was already too late, before Jin Ling could struggle enough to tear his ankle away from the grip there was already raspberries shaking and tickling with an awfully unbearable feeling every single nerve on his sole. He could only shriek when a ‘nomnomnom’ sound began following little nibbles on his toes, everything else in the word disappearing except the tickles and how much he was losing himself in laughter, every muscle finally going limp and tears appearing in the corner of his eyes.

Jiang Cheng gave him a last raspberry and huffed fondly, almost snickering when he realized the kid lightly pushing him away with a frown that didn’t last at all in the face of the remanescent giggles and smiles as he adjusted the younger back on his chest and brought them both back to laying on the bed, kissing his forehead and combing his hair softly.

“I’m getting revenge, tomorrow.” Without opening his eyes, he snuggled more in the embrace. “You’re too silly, jiujiu.” 

Jiang Cheng actually snorted. He was pretty sure that was an opinion that no one else would agree with his waisheng, but it didn’t matter. For once, he thought that they both would be able to go back to sleep again and find no nightmares. “Go to sleep, A-Ling.”

And they both did, falling back to a restful, soft sleep.

[twistedappletree]

if jiang cheng, wei wuxian, lan wangji and lan xichen all got turned into rabbits and the juniors had to coparent them, jin ling would obviously take care of jiujiu-bun, lan sizhui would take care of bun-xian, lan jingyi would take care of bun-ji (so wangxian could stay together) and ouyang zizhen would take care of zewu-bun 🐰

[crystalsnow95z]

Two different 3am stories copy and pasted together to create this, apologies for any mistakes after doing so. I didn't reread before posting. It's been sitting for months now.

Sickie; Taehyung with snz/cough and fever. Green zone means vom, not important to story but its staying. Skip to next green line to avoid.

Caretaker: Jin (a bit of Namjoon)

"Heh'ehhitch!" The sound of Taehyung's sneeze echos throughout the hotel room, followed by a wet sniffle.

Jin bolts up right, startled by the sudden loud sound. "Taehyung-ah you scared me.." He yawns out the words. "That's the fifth sneeze Tae, I think you're coming down with something.."

"I'm sorry Hyung. I think it's something in the air here.. my nose has been bothering me since we landed.." Taehyung goes into the bathroom to blow his nose, loudly filling the wad of toliet paper with mucus.

"Did you take any allergy pills?"

"Jungkookie gave me some this morning.. I guess they..ah..ha..Heh'ehhitch!" Taehyung sneezes into the tissue with a roar. "Heh'ehhitchaaugh...!" Another sneeze follows, followed by a cough, his sneezes starting to leave his throat feeling raw. "Hyung it hurts.." Taehyung whines, returning to his bed. "Do you think Jungkookie is still awake?"

"It's two in the morning Vuu, and he was super jet lagged. I don't think he'd be up and he's a super heavy sleeper." Jin tries to call him anyway when he sees Taehyungs eyes water. "Okay, okay I'll call."

"No its not that.. I just..hehtchii!" Taehyung muffled his sneeze with his arm. "Ah..ahchtich..!"

Is that Taehyung?

Namjoon sends a text to the group chat. His room was right next to theirs and he could tell Taehyung's monstrous sneezes anywhere.

I think I'm allergic to something here.🥺 do you have any allergy pills? Or maybe Hobi-hyung?

Taehyung sends a text back to him, trying to ignore the itch building up in his nose, but to no avail. "Aa..attchetu..! Ugh..." Taehyung pinches the bridge of his nose. "Heh'ehhitchaa..mmm.."

Hoba is asleep, and I don't have any. Sorry Tae. I could see if there's any store open nearby for you.

Namjoon messages back.

No, it's okay.. I'll wait until morning..

"Jaykay didn't answer." Jin informs him with a frown. "Are you sure you want to wait until morning? Me and Joonah can go together."

"Do we at least have something for a headache? I'll be fine if we have tha..tha..." Taehyung stops talking feeling another sneeze coming, but this time it doesn't come leaving him with just the painful pressure."mmm..."

"I think I have something..hold on, I'll look." Jin gets up to check his bag, finding the small travel size packet he was looking for. "Here Tae, hold this while I get you some water.

Taehyung rips the packet open, taking the small tablet out of the package. "H..heh..tchu!" He drops it somewhere on the bed when he covers his nose his cupped hands covering in mucus.

"Taehyung-ah, I said to hold it, not open it..don't worry. I'll find it.." Jin puts the water bottle on the side table, going in the bathroom to get a washcloth, wetting it to wash Taehyung off.

"Euuh.." Taehyung looks at his hands with disgust.

"Let hyung wash you up." Jin dabs near Taehyung's nose, cleaning the yellow-tinged mucus from his face, then wiping off his hands. "There, all done. Now, don't move until I find where you dropped the pill."

Taehyung tries to sit still, but a sneeze snuck up on him without any warning. "Actichivvah...!" Taehyung sneezes on Jin, eyes growing wide. "I'm sorry..I'm sorry!" Taehyung bows in apology.

"Taehyung, I'm not mad. It was an accident. You can't help it if you don't feel well, just try to cover it next time,okay?" Jin says soothingly,holding the round pill in his hand. "Open your mouth."

Taehyung obeys, Jin placing the pill on his tongue, giving him the water to swallow it down, not letting him hold either in case another sneeze came.

"Good, now lay down and get some sleep.. we'll get you feeling better in the morning." Jin pulls the blanket over Taehyung.

"Jinnie-hyung?" Taehyung asks softly, coughing under the blanket.

"What is it Tae?"

"Will you sleep next to me?"

"I'll lay with you for a bit, but then I'm going to my bed okay? It'll be hard for me to sleep with you sneezing and coughing.."

"Then nevermind. It's okay." Taehyung tries to sound indifferent about it, but Jin could hear the disappointment in his voice.

Jin puts in his earbuds to tune out Taehyungs sneezing, turning off the light. "Alright, I'll sleep next to you, but try not to sneeze on me."

Taehyung nods, hugging his pillow to his chest to cover his face as another cough comes. Jin wraps around Taehyung's small frame, hugging him from behind. "Good night, Tae."

Jin woke up feeling uncomfortably warm, trying to push the blanket away, still half asleep. Why is it so hot? Only when his blanket started coughing did he fully wake. "Taehyung-ah you're burning up.."

Taehyung was still asleep,laying on Jin's chest, his leg pinning him to the bed. His cheeks were now flushed red like his nose and a layer of sweat covered his body.

"Oh Tete, I don't think it's just allergies..I think you're sick.." Jin whispers when he sees he's still asleep not daring to wake him. I need to tell the others. We were supposed to meet up in the morning..Jin moves Taehyung's bangs that plastered his face to behind his ear. My poor baby..you're definitely going to break out.. I need to try to get this sweat off you..

Jin gently pushes up Taehyung's shirt to try to get what he could off, using the blanket to dab the sweat off of him, noticing the hives have already started on his lower back. "Aiigo.."

Jin slowly rolls Tae off of him, only getting a small whine as a complaint. "It's okay Vuu I'll be right back.." He gets his phone off the bed and goes in the bathroom, calling Namjoon and putting it on speaker.

"Hyung you're up early. Did you sleep well?" Namjoon responds quickly to the call.

"Joon Tae is sick.. we need to find some medicine. I put you on speaker phone so i can look something up.." Jin gets right to the point when he hears Taehyung sneezing again.

"Heh'ehhitch...ahh.." Taehyung whines, sitting up slowly but falling back down on the pillow when vertigo hits him. . "Hyung...?" He looks around the room for Jin, but the dizziness blurred his vision. "Seok..ah..ah Heh'ehhitch.. Heh'ehhitxch.." Taehyung sneezes into the blanket. It feels like someone's trying to push my eyes out from the inside.. Taehyung whined miserably as he felt the itch switch from his nose to his throat a cough rattling his chest.

"Why do you sound so worried? We can get him some allergy medicine, and he'll be okay." Namjoon replies unaware of the situation.

"No, it's not that. He has a fever now, and it's not clear runny nose snot anymore, it's thick yellow goo, that means he has some sort of infection. He's actually sick." Jin's speaks quickly, looking up the difference on his phone.

"Calm down Hyung. Even if he caught a cold we can get him some proper medicine. Is he still asleep?"

"He was asleep when I left the bed to call.." Jin quickly wets a washcloth and goes back to the main room, dropping it when he sees Taehyung coughing uncontrollably into the blanket, eyes streaming with tears. "Aiigo, Taehyungie don't cry.. Hyung here.." Jin places the phone down on the bed to wrap around Taehyung.

"Oh sh*t.." Namjoon speaks in English. "I'm already out and about right now. I decided to get some fresh air before we got ready to practice on stage.."

"The concert.." Taehyung feels his heart shattering. The reason why they flew there is that they were going a three day concert. I can hardly breathe, how will I be able to sing?

The tears flowed harder, leaving Taehyung gasping for air.

"Namjoon-ah be quiet! Don't talk about it right now." Jin scolds him the usually carefree vocalist glaring at the phone.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm so stupid.." Namjoon didn't mean to upset Taehyung. He wanted to tell him he had time to recover, but he didn't want to bring his hopes up."We'll figure this out okay?Seojinnie Hyung keep your distance so you don't get sick too.."

"Namjoon, hang up the phone." Jin speaks in a serious tone when Taehyung quickly pushes him away from him.

I already sneezed on him and had him hold me all night. There's no way he's not going to get sick, too.. Taehyung sobs into the pillow. I don't know if we can do the show with two missing members..

"Vuu, baby come here. You didn't know and I should've been more careful, so it's my fault too. It's okay. No one's upset at you." Jin pulls Taehyung close, but his words weren't getting through to him. "Taehyung, Tae you have to breathe.." He says in a panic when Taehyung starts coughing without any signs of stopping. "Please Tae, it's okay, I'd rather be suffering with you than see you like this, it's breaking my heart.." Jin pries the pillow away from Taehyung's face feeling his chest tighten as he pulls him to his chest, just stroking his hair.

Taehyung takes a few deep breaths to try to slow his breathing, hearing Jin's accelerated heartbeat. "I.i'm s..sorry.. i..I didn't mean to sc..a. ah..etchiuu!" A sneeze stops him mid-sentence, sneezing into his arm. "I..I'm sorry.." Taehyung sniffles.

"Hey Tae?" Jin asks suddenly. "What do you call an apologetic fruit?"

"Huh..?" Taehyung is taken by surprise by the sudden question.

"What do you call an apologetic fruit?" Jin smiles when he sees Taehyung's breath becoming more steady. "

"Oh..I think you told me the answer before..wait.." Taehyung sniffles. "Heh'ehhitch..ahh.. It was sagwa!"

"Well what did zero say to eight?" Jin asks before Taehyung could go back to worrying about the future events.

Taehyung just looks at him with a confused expression, scratching at his belly. His mind was fogging from the fever. "I don't know.."

"Nice belt." Jin laughs at his own joke, getting a small smile out of the young vocalist. Jin continued to tell him jokes until it looked like Taehyung forgot why he was crying, stopping when Taehyung's giggle turns into a cough.

It worked.. but he still isn't looking good... Jin sighs. "Are you feeling a little better?"

"I'm calmer now.. but Hyung.. it hurts.. to breathe.." Taehyung's breath comes out in short gasps, his throat swollen and his nose completely clogged. "What am I gonna do..?"

"I know, Namjoonie will bring you some medicine to help.. We need to worry about getting you better before anything else." Jin goes in the bathroom taking the roll of toliet paper from the roll and bringing it to him. "Here Tete."

Taehyung tries his best to clear his nose, but no matter how much came out, it was like more magically appeared. "Heh'ehhitchii." Another round of sneezes come, his constant rubbing to try to keep it from dripping, irritating it further. "Heh'ehhitch..Heh'ehhitxch!..a..ahh.achtchi...!" Each sneeze was louder than the one before it, jolting his body. "Mmmm..." Taehyung sniffles whining softly, the drainage into his throat causing him to cough. He rubs his hand across his chest to try to ease the pain. Now, not only does my head and throat hurt, but my ribs too..

Namjoon knocks on the door, Jin jumping up to answer, peeking through the peep hole before opening the door for him.

Namjoon enters, spilling the contents of one of his shopping bags onto the desk, finding his new thermometer, using it to scan Taehyung's temperature. "We gotta get it down, it's on the borderline of being a high grade fever.." Namjoon frowns at the orange flashing number.

Jin was already cracking the seal of the cold medicine Namjoon brought. "I'll get him in the bath."

"I don't want to get up..my head feels all floaty.." Taehyung says in a rough whisper. "My voice..."

"Shh..don't talk, you'll make it worse.." Jin hands him the medicine. "Here Vuu, take this for me."

Taehyung swallows the medicine down, reaching for the water to wash it down. "Hyung.."

Taehyung falls forward, Namjoon putting out his arm to catch him. "Woah, Tae. I got ya.."

Taehyung closes his eyes tightly waiting for the dizziness to fade, nausea swirling in the pit of his stomach. "I.." Taehyung tries to convey his needs to Namjoon, but his voice breaks off into a cough. I'm going to be sick.. "Nam.." His stomach sloshed painfully, pushing up his dinner from last night. Taehyung wraps his hand around himself with another bout of coughing, unable to get the words out, letting out a whine in frustration.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Sh*t..Seokjin get a waste bin.." Namjoon finally understood what he desperately wanted, quickly jumping onto the bed to anchor him onto the bed as he doubled over the waste bin Jin brought him.

Taehyung gagged on the thick mucus mixed with bile that filled his throat. His body trembled with effort as he heaved everything in his body, burping up mouthfuls of mostly digested pork belly and rice.

"It's okay, it's okay.. I got you.. just let it all out.. You're okay.." Namjoon strokes his hand across Taehyung's back, drawing shapes.

Taehyung didn't feel like he would be okay. His body was being pushed past its limits, even after he had nothing left he couldn't stop the dry heaves.

"Vuu.. Try to take deep breaths for me okay? Deep breaths baby.." Jin strokes his hair and he speaks softly to him. Taehyung tried to be obedient to his eldest hyung, but when he tried to breathe in, it caused him to cough.

"I know it hurts, but please.. keep trying okay Tae?" Namjoon encourages him, gently holding the youngers swollen throat to ease some of the pain.

Taehyung manages to take a few breaths, the gagging dying down, leaning into Namjoon. He tried to speak, but his throat was so raw nothing came but a breathy whisper that just looked like he was mouthing the words.

"Here, wash out your mouth Tae.." Jin gives him a water bottle, holding a small cup. Taehyung takes a mouthful of water, swishing it in his mouth before spitting it out in the cup.

"Is your stomach feeling any better now?" Namjoon asks, rubbing his hand across Taehyung's stomach.

Taehyung nods, then makes makes a gesture for telephone.

"Good idea. You can text instead. "Jin searches for it, finding it on the table. "Here Tae."

Taehyung types in a note app.

I got realy dizzy, and it made me feel sick to my stomacj, I'm okay noq.. I think it's just stress.. I just want to lay down for a bit..I still feel bad..

Taehyung's hands shook when he typed, making him hit the wrong keys.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Namjoon gently moves Taehyung to a laying position, leaving the bed when he hears his phone vibrating in his pocket. "I'm sorry, but I got to take this.." Namjoon frowns looking at his phone.

"It's okay if you need to go. I'll take care of Taehyungie. Thanks for going shopping for me."

Jin whispers as he hears Namjoon talking to one of the directors on the phone.

Namjoon bows apologeticly before nodding, leaving Jin alone with Taehyung again.

"I have to bring down that fever.." Jin evaluates the situation he's in, watching the sleeping figure on the bed.

I could carry him to the bath, but he's so weak right now, I don't even think he could keep his head above the water.

Jin opts to use a wet cloth, gently stripping Taehyung down to his boxers.

"Heh'ehhitch..!" Taehyung sneezes when his shirt brushes against his nose.

"I'm sorry Tae-yah. I didn't mean to wake you, go back to sleep Baby.."

Taehyung curls into a tight ball, shivering from the cold sweat that coated his body. It's cold..

"I know, I know..please just wait a bit and I'll hold you. I just need to try to cool you off a bit. I'll be right back."

Taehyung reaches for Jins hand before he walks away, but underestimates how far he is grabbing at the air. Jin uses the hotel ice bucket to hold water, bringing it to the table to gently wipe off the sweat that covered Tae's body. Taehyung shiveres, trying to push it away.

"Now, now please don't fight me, it's for your own good. Stop it. The faster i can do this the sooner i can give you cuddles." Jin holds his hands still, continuing his sponge bath, making gentle circles, humming softly.

"Heh,'ehhitchew!" Taehyung's sneezes were also starting to lose their power, becoming quieter. That didn't stop them from being messy, though. Jin wipes his face clean again, relieved when he notices the vocalist had fallen asleep again.

Using the opportunity to escape to the best of his ability, he goes to check his arsenal of supplies. Cold Medicine, vitimins, two boxes of tissue, ginseng tea,cough drops, cooling cloths,water bottles, pain killers,a whole bag full of food...

Jin's stomach rumbled at the thought of food, pulling out a pack of instant ramen.

I'll eat while he's asleep.. I need to get him to try to eat when he wakes up..

Jin takes a break from taking care of Taehyung boiling some water. His nose started developing an itch similar to Taehyung's a quiet sneeze escaping him. "Hehtigh.." I sure hope that's the only one..

[ravenesse]

Borrowed Stars — Chapter 17 🤍

Summary:

“Taehyung has over a thousand playlists on his phone."

[sopebubbles]

Chapter Eleven

Summary: How many men will it take to save you? To be honest, you’ve gotten pretty used to saving yourself. Even though you’re far from a delicate thing, Los Angeles is a dangerous place you can’t seem to escape no matter how hard you try. The top 7 members of Bangtan should never have crossed your path, but they soon find they’d do just about anything to help you escape your past and make it safe for you to stay. But will you?

Genre: mafia au, poly ot7, angst, some smut, honestly a lot more fluff than i expected, POC reader/oc

A/n: I'm sorry this update is a little shorter than the others! I think thematically it made sense to separate them this way. Also I swear I did not mean to post this on beastie-writes 😪 so I'm sorry if that threw anybody off! I made the update and saw my draft was saved under the wrong name and didn't want to start over. The other chapters will continue on sopebubbles!

A/n 2: I am re-posting this chapter because t*mblr did a t*mblr thing and deleted @/beastie-writes, where this chapter was originally posted. It's not new. Now back to our regular programing.

Warnings: angst and lots of feeling (hopefully good ones too!!)

Word count: 3.8K

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It was easy to fall into a routine at the Bangtan house. You’d wake up in the morning, grab something to eat and chat with Jungkook by the poolside before he left with Namjoon to fulfill their duties. Then you’d “go for a walk” around the house. You told yourself that this was to wear off some of your excess energy and become familiar with the grounds in case you needed to escape, but the fact that your walk ended every day with you finding Yoongi was not lost on either of you. 

Yoongi was endeared to see the way you would shuffle and stare at your feet, asking him what he was up to when what you really wanted was to sit on the couch and watch dramas together. You may not have wanted to take him away from his work or maybe you just weren’t in the habit of asking for what you wanted, but regardless of you never expressing your wish, Yoongi was always happy to be the first one to offer.

“Do you want to finish watching that drama from yesterday?” he’d ask, watching your face brighten as you’d nod eagerly. “Lemme finish up here and you can go grab Jimin.”

And you would. Because their roles rarely required them to leave the grounds, Jimin and Yoongi became your natural drama buddies. Every afternoon you’d pile on the couch together while Yoongi gathered snacks. They always seemed to be able to spare a couple of hours for you. Even Jimin, who at first seemed apprehensive around you, was showing signs of enjoying your company.

Jimin started sitting closer to you on the couch and offering you some of his snacks. He liked to look up fan theories on his phone while you guys watched and would often share them with you and ask your opinion about them after each episode. 

But Jimin noticed the way you never closed the distance when you sat near him on the couch, how you kept your muscles tense even as Yoongi catered to you. There was a calculation in your movements so that even as you were at-ease in your body language, you were never quite relaxed. Jimin wondered if he was contributing to your tension. He thought he was demonstrating his acceptance of you, but maybe he needed to do more.

“Val, do you want to cuddle?” Jimin asked one afternoon while you were both waiting for Yoongi to bring snacks.

The question caught you completely by surprise, your face heating with embarrassment, “I…um…”

“You don’t have to,” Jimin added nonchalantly. “I just thought it would help.”

“What would help?” Yoongi asked, setting the popcorn down in front of you.

“Us cuddling with Val.”

“And that would help with what exactly?” You kept your face to the paused screen in front of you, not trusting yourself to look at either of the men giving you their full attention.

Jimin shrugged, “You just hold yourself like someone who’s been rejected, but we’re not rejecting you. So I thought maybe us holding you would make you realize we’re not rejecting you.”

Yoongi chuckled awkwardly. Jimin’s brand of matter-of-fact honesty always toed the line of refreshing and uncomfortable. Jimin was sharply attuned to people’s body language, but not in predicting how his words could make other people feel. “There’s no pressure. You don’t have to,” Yoongi offered kindly, giving you an out.

“It…it might be nice,” you whispered shyly. You thought back to the tender touches and closeness you shared with Taehyung and how nice it used to feel. But back then, it always led to something more. “Only cuddling, right?”

“If that’s what you want,” Jimin shrugged again, leaving the implication that you could want more hanging in the air.

“Only cuddling. And if you want to stop, just tell us you want to stop,” Yoongi assured.

“Okay,” you agreed, feeling awkward about what to do next.

Jimin scooted closer to you, tapping on his chest, “Go ahead, snuggle up. I’m softer than Yoongi-hyung.”

Yoongi scoffed and you couldn’t help the giggle that escaped you as you curled up against Jimin’s chest. He was comfy and warm, smelling of clean laundry as he let his arm hang lazily around you.

“You can lay out your legs across mine,” Yoongi suggested, scooting closer to you and Jimin. You were still a little worried as you stretched yourself across Yoongi, but he gave you a reassuring pat. “It’s like I have a Val blanket,” he giggled.

You could have laughed at that too, lost in the giddiness of how cozy you felt. But instead, you hummed in acknowledgement, already being lulled by Jimin’s heartbeat and the warmth of his chest. 

Jimin glanced down to see you completely slack against him, eyes heavy as your breath evened. He smirked, satisfied that he had finally gotten you to relax as he started to play with your hair, earning a happy sigh from you. 

>>>>

“You look rested,” Jin mentioned, as he finished chopping up some green onion. His usual “Kiss the Cook” apron was tied around him while he reached for mushrooms to chop. 

Your stomach swirled with uneasiness as you thought back to how you fell asleep on Jimin’s chest during your afternoon cuddle session. You’d woken up to a gentle nudge from Yoongi, your fists clenched tightly in Jimin’s shirt and a small drool stain where you had rested your head on Jimin’s chest. Jimin was unbothered, and rather amused to see how relaxed you had been, but the thought of you letting go of your well-practiced control, even for a moment, unsettled you. You made a quick apology and excused yourself to help Seokjin, who had started the habit of coming over to make dinner in the evenings. 

“What’re you making?” You asked, pointedly ignoring his comment and hopping up on the stool across from him.

“Doenjang-jjigae,” Jin answered with a happy hum, expertly cutting up the vegetables in front of him. Having watched him for several days now, this was not the first time you wondered what other skills Jin wielded with a knife.

“Jjigae? Is that stew?” You guessed.

Jin nodded, “It’s made with a soy-bean paste. It’s a pretty common dish.”

You gave a thoughtful hum, but said nothing more.

“Is something bothering you?” Jin asked, combining the vegetables together. “Normally by this point you’re asking how you can help and taking it upon yourself to add seasoning to everything. Yesterday I nearly had to wrestle you to the ground to prevent you from dumping a whole tub of gochujang into the japchae.”

“Gochujang is good though,” you grumbled, poking at a bit of mushroom that rolled across the counter.

“Yaeya, dong-uihae! But the secret to good japchae is the right balance of soy sauce and brown sugar and I have been perfecting that balance for decades.”

“You’re not that old.”

“I started young. Do you think I let my mother eat bad japchae after I was conceived? No! She had terrible morning sickness because of me and lots of bad japchae,” Seokjin was basically shouting as he dumped the vegetables into the bubbling broth.

You laughed heartily, hands covering your face at Jin’s overzealousness. With a spirit like his, you imagine his mother probably did get indigestion.

“Why’re you always coming over here to cook dinner if you have your own place?” You asked once your laughter subsided.

“I asked you a question first.”

“I’m ignoring it.”

Seokjin shrugged as if to say “suit yourself”  before responding, “Namjoon asked me to. He wants to make sure you stay well-nourished and I’m the best cook in the bunch, so…” he gestured openly with his arms, “here I am.”

“No offense, but you don’t really seem like the type to follow orders,” you mused.

“None taken,” he replied, focusing now on on the slow-cooked beef from the oven. The smells in the kitchen were starting to blend together and permeate the air, making your stomach rumble inaudibly. “There’s no shame in following orders. Plus, I get to enjoy your company.”

You pouted, unsatisfied and hungry, “I don’t believe you.”

“That there’s no shame in following orders or that I enjoy your company?”

“Both.”

“Well, the most powerful thing you can do is believe you have power in the first place; regardless of if you’re on the giving or receiving end of orders,” Seokjin explained, putting the beef into the stew and lowering the temperature on the stove to a simmer. You grunted, still not impressed. Power was power in your mind. You either took what was yours or you didn’t. “And as far as your company,” Seokjin continued. “It’s a tragedy you’re the last to know, but you’re kinda cool to hang out with.”

“Yeah, right,” you scoffed. “All I do is sit around all day.”

Seokjin’s eyes widened dramatically and, putting a hand to his mouth, he gasped in mock-horror, “I hadn’t considered that. I guess I am having a terrible time.”

“Cállate, pendejo,” you laughed.

“Once I figure out what that means, I’ll have a very witty comeback,” Seokjin grinned, wagging a finger at you. “Go get the others, dinners ready.”

>>>>>>>

You wouldn’t want to admit it, but you enjoyed the cacophony of the Bangtan dinner table. So often you were left to eat dinner either by yourself or, on rare occasions, with Joaquin, that you weren’t sure how everyone could be so noisy and chew their food at the same time. Even just the hums and moans they made as they ate and complimented the food made the meals loud even without active conversation. It seemed like every meal was the best meal they ever ate. And to be fair, every meal was delicious. Perhaps Seokjin really was the best cook in the bunch, though you hadn’t tried everyone else’s cooking to compare it.

You liked to sit next to Yoongi during dinner. Partly because Yoongi was good at loading your plate while explaining what you were eating and how to eat it. But mostly because, even if you were still embarrassed from earlier, Yoongi always had a way of making you feel safe and unjudged.

“Keep your thumb steady and only move your pointer finger. And remember, we have forks,” Yoongi advised as he watched your kimchi sliding off your chopsticks again and again.

“She’s got it, she’s got it,” Hoseok chanted in Korean. You were sticking your tongue out a bit in concentration, studying carefully with furrowed brows as the red piece of cabbage made it to your lips. The entire table erupted in applause and you scooted your chair back to stand up and take a bow.

“To Val!” Namjoon cheered, raising a shot glass of soju, the other men echoing “To Val!” as they downed their shot.

When you plopped back into your chair, you reached for Yoongi’s hand on the table and while everyone was laughing and carrying on you whispered, “Thank you for always looking out for me, Oppa.”

Your heart swelled while you watched his ears turn red, “Always,” he whispered back, rubbing the back of your hand with his thumb. 

The dinner continued on in a light-hearted, joyous mood with little talk of Bangtan’s work life or your dire predicament. You tried to let yourself be lulled by the conversation, but the unease you were familiar with was back, bubbling up through your stomach and clawing its way to your throat. You kept quiet though, looking out over the table, listening to the blend of Korean and English around you, wondering when they might confront you about earning your keep or when they might get sick of taking care of you and ask you to leave. No one could really be that impressed with your ability to use chopsticks. It was silly and stupid and everyone else could do it anyway, so why did they need to pretend on your behalf? Were they setting you up for something? Trying to gain your trust? You became acutely aware of how you had slumped in your chair and were no longer contributing to the conversation. Were you killing the mood? Were the boys aware of how untrusting you were? Would they care? Your eyes settled on the empty spot where Taehyung still failed to show up for dinner. He wasn’t there because you didn’t want to see him. You knew that. You had asked for this space and he was giving it to you. It was kind, more kind than you were used to or expected. Everything here was. But why did it feel ominous now? Where was the catch?

“Excuse me,” you said, standing up with a polite smile before you finished your plate. “Everything was delicious, Seokjin, thank you.”

If anyone noticed the way your mood was faltering, no one said anything. Seokjin had been laughing at something Hoseok was telling him when he passively said, “My pleasure! It’s nice to have your moral support in the kitchen.”

“Do you need me to get you anything?” Yoongi asked, searching your face for an explanation as to why you were leaving early.

“I’m good, Oppa,” You lied. “Just a little tired.”

Yoongi nodded, “I’ll clean up your plate. Don’t worry about it.”

“Thank you.”

It felt like miles before you got to your bed, but when you finally reached it, you buried your face into a pillow and let yourself cry.

>>>

The light from outside your bedroom shone underneath the door creating dramatic shadows from the furniture in the room. Sitting up slowly, you blinked and rubbed your puffy eyes. You hadn’t meant to fall asleep but you were grateful that it was dreamless. Unfortunately, it meant that you would have an even harder time falling back to sleep. You sighed, the heaviness of your emotions had subsided but the echo of them was still there. You let yourself be ebbed by the flow of your aimless thoughts until your mind found itself back to when you had napped earlier that day. Between Yoongi and Jimin. Against Jimin’s chest. There was no pressure or expectation in listening to Jimin breathe and the way he and Yoongi avoided clinging to you made you feel secure in the fact that you could leave whenever you wanted. It was nice and you missed it. It was warm and you wanted more.

Before you could chastise yourself for being greedy, you left the room quickly to find Jimin. You told yourself, at the very least, you could apologize for drooling on his shirt earlier. Lucky for you, no one was around as you made your way to the basement, so you could avoid explaining your true motives.

When you approached the door, you heard gunfire and shouting. Jimin was clearly yelling at his TV. You knocked on Jimin’s door tentatively.

“Fuck this, man.” Jimin grumbled from the other side of the door. The noises from the action sequence stopped suddenly as he called, “Come in!”

“I think you’re loosing your touch–” another voice teased as you opened the door to see Jimin leaning back on his couch, game controller to his left as he idly played with Taehyung’s hair and watched you come in. It took you a second to register what you were seeing. Taehyung was stretched out on the couch, head in Jimin’s lap, game controller in hand. Neither of them were wearing shirts and their sweatpants hung low around their hips. It wasn’t anything you hadn’t seen before, but you still looked away. “Sorry, if I’m interrupting something…” you trailed off, rubbing your arm to get rid of the goosebumps.

“No, no,” Taehyung shot off of Jimin’s lap and to his feet. “I’m sorry. I can leave, it’s getting late anyway–”

“It’s okay,” you said, finding his eyes to show him you meant it. “You can stay. It’s, um…Nice to see you.” Even this small confession left your heart aching in your chest. After everything that happened, you hoped Taehyung didn’t hate you, but you also hoped you wouldn’t have to explain yourself tonight. “Please stay.”

Jimin watched the two of you, not sure of what to make of the exchange. He ultimately decided it wasn’t his responsibility to figure out why the two of you looked so uncomfortable, so instead he said, “Did you need something?”

“I just wanted to apologize for earlier,” you answered, sheepishly. Now that you were actually in Jimin’s space, your plan felt very silly. 

“What happened earlier?” Jimin said, confused. He was genuinely unaware of something you had done wrong and you had never visited him before, so all of this seemed highly uncalled for.

“When I drooled on you…” You replied, feeling more and more embarrassed by the moment.

“Oooh,” Jimin realized. “Oh that? It’s fine. Sometimes people drool when they’re relaxed. I think it’s kind of nice.”

“Did you guys play together?” Taehyung asked, trying to hide his shock.

“Play together?” You echoed, having no idea what Taehyung meant.

“Nah, she fell asleep on my chest and drooled on my shirt,” Jimin said easily. “I have an extra controller. Do you want to play with us?”

You looked at the screen with the words Call of Duty across the top, “I’ve never played video games before.”

“This wouldn’t be a good one to start with then,” Jimin thought out loud. “You guys should sit down. I’m gonna get the Switch so we can play Mario Kart. I’ll be right back.”

Jimin stretched as he stood up, cracking his neck as he did so, and briskly walked out of the room, leaving you and a shirtless Taehyung standing in the middle of the room, dim lighting letting the weight of each other’s presence be known.

“Are you sure it’s okay if I stay?” Taehyung asked hesitantly.

“Yes, but could you put on a shirt please?”

“Right,” Taehyung said, suddenly embarrassed. You turned your eyes to him, watching as his white tshirt fell loosely over his tanned shoulders, hiding away the muscles in his back that you once knew so well. That ache you had returned again and you were suddenly desperate for being held. Your emotions bubbled up to your throat as you struggled to swallow them back, wrapping your arms around yourself in an attempt to be soothed. 

Taehyung’s heart broke as he turned back to look at you. You were only a few feet in front of him and closer than you had been in weeks, but standing there, looking so small as you held yourself away from him, he thought you were farther than ever. He wanted to kiss you again and keep you safe in his arms. He wanted to explain that when he called you his before it was only because his heart knew it found its missing piece when he met you and that he was wrong to think of himself as entitled to you and he was sorry he ever did. He was a monster in your life while you were the light in his and he was so, so sorry.

When Jimin walked into the room, he noticed that you were both on the brink of tears. He knew that you both had history with one another, but he wasn’t quite sure what could cause such a reaction when neither of you had even been talking to each other.

“Do you guys need to hug?” Jimin suggested.

“Um..” You knew your answer before Jimin had even asked the question, every nerve in your body was begging for it. 

Jimin narrowed his eyes like he had formed some conclusion while observing you, “I think you guys need to hug.”

“Please,” you had barely gotten the word out when Taehyung closed the distance and wrapped his arms around you. Breathing in the familiar scent broke the last defense you had in protecting yourself from your emotions. You nuzzled into his chest and let the tears fall from your face, feeling a wetness against your shoulder as Taehyung buried his face in your neck.

Taehyung tried not to squeeze you too tight despite the overwhelming sense of relief he felt with having you in his arms. He told himself that even if this was all you were willing to give him for the rest of your life, he would accept it. He would never again ask for more than what you were willing to give. His shoulders shook as he wept against you and eventually he felt you rubbing his back, still not moving away or asking him to let go.

Jimin was content to let the moment continue for as long as you both needed, seeing that there was a lot that you guys needed to process even if neither of you had words for it yet. 

Eventually, your tears had stopped and you whispered gentle shushing against Taehyung, feeling warmth spread throughout your body at feeling the weight of him in your arms. Slowly, he pulled himself away from you, looking down at you with a sense of wonder that you hoped you returned in kind. Whatever the embrace had done for you, it appeared Taehyung had needed it just as desperately.

“Do you guys still want to play Mario Kart?” Jimin asked, already moving to set up the switch as if you had said yes.

You giggled wetly, still high from your relief, “Sure.”

Taehyung also laughed, a little awkwardly as he ran his fingers through his hair, “Yeah, that sounds fun.”

Jimin turned back to the two of you, noticing something he had missed before, “Do I need to put on a shirt too?”

“If you don’t mind,” You said.

“I’ll wear a fuzzy shirt so you can lay against me again,” Jimin announced. “I think you like cuddling.”

You had experienced too many emotions today to be embarrassed anymore or try to deny it, so instead you nodded, “I think you’re right.” You turned to Taehyung. “You’ll stay and cuddle too, right?”

Taehyung could have cried again if he hadn’t already drained himself of all of it. He sniffled, happily, “If you want me to.”

“I want you to,” You assured, taking his hand and leading him over to the couch. Jimin plopped on the other side of you, wearing a fuzzy black sweater. You were all snuggled up together, you leaning into Jimin and Taehyung leaning into you. Your leg was trapped between Taehyung’s body and the couch but you wouldn’t complain. You didn’t want anything to change. 

Chipper music began as the start menu loaded, looking at the tiny controller in your hand, you couldn’t help your fit of laughter.

“I have no idea what I’m doing,” you said, not sure if you meant the game or in general.

“Don’t worry,” Jimin said, quickly making selections on the screen before you were able to choose your own character. “We’ll help you.”

[onhajoon]

NEW UPDATE FOR THE TAXI DRIVER S2 AU!

CHAPTER 3 is HERE

In which Danwoo makes some progress and learns how to lean on the others (Doki mainly), team hijinks happen, but then shit hits the fan (in the next update, due this week!) ✊😔(😎😏🕶👌)