#jen streams stuff

[sparkwithinme]

Many a clips from my Twitch streams of Final Fantasy XIV :D First time I've edited any video in yeaaars. It's not brilliant quality, but did my best. XD

[if-whats-new]

What's New In IF? Issue 25 (2024)

By Brij, Dion, Bex and Jen

Now Available!

Itch.io - Keep Reading below

If you read the zine, consider liking the post: it helps us see how many people see it! And sharing is caring! <3

~ EDITORIAL ~

Wow what’s that? So many jams!

Game jams are a great way to bring together all kinds of game enthusiasts and make exciting new things. It’s also a great way for us readers to find new stuff. And this issue just broke its record in featured jams! So check them all out.

We want some feedback!

As we’re starting to get a hand of things, we would love some feedback from you guys! What you enjoy, want more or less off, how we could improve... Anything goes! We even have a nifty form!

Still looking for members!

Due to the severe changes in the Zine team, we are once again looking for free hands with a couple of hours to kill, and minds, looking to make a little difference in the community!

If you too would like to help us out in a more official capacity, please shoot us a message! You can check out the available positions here, but if you’d like to help in any other way, feel free to contact us as well!

No Small Talk for some time!

We hope you enjoy this new issue!

BRIJ, DION, BEX AND JEN

~ BE A PART OF THE ZINE ~

THIS ZINE ONLY HAPPENS WITH YOU!

Want to write 1-2 pages about a neat topic, or deep-dive into a game and review it in details? Share personal experiences or get all academic?

WRITE FOR THE COLUMN!

Prefer to be more low-key but still have something to share? Send us a Zine Letter or share a game title for Highlight on…!

WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU!

Excited as we are about next week's interview and have questions for our guest? Or want to see a certain author answer questions next? Message us!

SMALL TALK... IS WAITING!

Came across something interesting? Know a release or an update announced? Saw an event happening? Whether it's a game, an article, a podcast… Add any IF-related content to our mini-database!

EVERY LITTLE BIT COUNTS!

Contact us through Tumblr asks, Forum DMs, or even by email! And thank you for your help!!

~ EVENT SPOTLIGHT : ECTOCOMP 2024 ~

La Petite Mort or Le Grand Guignol? Either way, it’s going to get spooky!

Ever since October 2007 spooky-game enthusiasts all over the world have a chance to participate in ECTOCOMP, an annual competition for interactive fiction celebrating the SPOOKY MONTH OF HALLOWEENTOBER. Whether you celebrate Halloween, Day of the Dead, All Saint's Eve, or just love ghost stories and creeping people out, this is your time to shine!

Previously organized by Jason Guest for ADRIFT games, the jam is now open to all development platforms. Since the beginning of this initiative, there has been a motivation to unite and strengthen ties between international communities in the IF world. Creators can submit games either in one of the four main languages - English, Spanish, French and German or any other!

This year marks the 40th anniversary of Ghostbusters. Named after the Ghostbusters’ car license plate number ECTO 1, this year the jam pays tribute to the film that inspired the title! Some other subthemes and inspiration prompts are: Spooky adventure, Sweet supernatural, Halloween fest, Día de Los Muertos, All Saints', All Souls' Eve and any other festivity or mythology around the world.

As per tradition, Ectocomp has two categories:

La Petite Mort, for those who want to speed-write their game in 4 hours or less.

Le Grand Guignol, for games that, for whatever reason, took longer than 4 hours to write.

When the jam is over, all of the submitted games will be uploaded to the IF Archive.

~ ENDED ~

The voting for IFComp ended, the votes are boing counted and the results will be announced on October 19th! You can tune in for the Awards Ceremony stream. (October 19 at 4pm Eastern)

~ ONGOING (VOTING) ~

Entries have been submitted for the 6th Spooktober Annual Visual Novel Jam! You can vote for your favourites until October 27th! Every October Friday you can also watch Chizu's sponsored Spooktober Stream where she plays through all submissions!

~ ONGOING (SUBMITTING) ~

Another edition of the Bad Art Visual Novel Jam is upon us! The submissions are open until October 19th for anything following the theme Super Hero/Super Villain. Just remember: No good art!

Find inspiration in dusty old decrepit corners, revivify the forgotten - the Revival Jam 2024 is here! You can submit anything you want until the 20th of October.

Strip IF to it’s bare bones and all it become beautiful text. That’s what The Bare-Bones Jam is about.

It’s spooky month and with it comes the annual ECTOCOMP 2024. If it’s spooky or supernatural why not submit it?

Running until Halloween, the Phantasia Jam is a three months game jam to create a fantasy narrative game, with the theme of “Hidden Magic”. It accepts both VN and IF.

On the CoG Forum, Halloween is already there! Until Oct 31st, you can submit your projects to the Halloween Jam - but don't forget the theme! VAMPIRE, Murder, 70’s Disco!

Disabled Rep VN Jam has a very simple premise but a very important message.

Once upon a time, a game jam was held to create stories around the theme of fairy tales… and that game jam is the Once Upon A Time VN Jam. It’s running from October 1st to January 31st.

Concours de Fiction Interactive Francophone 2025 is for all French-speaking enthusiasts. Submissions are accepted March 3rd 2025.

Are you perhaps a fan of more somber, melancholic themes? Then check out the Dying Year - Visual Novel Jam! You have until the end of the year to participate.

The Black Visual Novel Jam is all about working with creative professional developers who work in visual novels to bring more Black stories to life. The goal is to create a space where Black creators can show their unique storytelling through visual novels.

Bare your teeth and sharpen your claws because the Monstrous Desires 2024 Visual Novel Jam is here! Dedicated to the love of entities, horrors, and monstrosities, this jam will be full of romantic Visual Novels (VN) that heavily focus on a monster may it be original or from classics, folklore, modern media, etc.

~ OTHER ~

The Interactive Fiction Showcase is still running! If you have completed an IF piece this year, consider submitting it! It is happening only on itch!

~ NEW RELEASE ~

Ink and Intrigue (CScript) is an interactive erotic fantasy novel about finding love on a lush tropical island among immortal warrior-mages as you explore ancient mysteries, craft dragon-rune tattoos, and discover your true loyalties. @leiatalon

Locked Out (Ren'Py) is a short kinetic visual novel about a young women that gets locked out of her own apartment.

Are you a The Sims lover? Then check out Buck and Jill's Trick-Or-Treat Adventure. @emperorofthedark

Daemonologie (Unreal Engine) is a short folk horror story influenced by the Scottish witch trials of the late 17th century.

Playing the game is letting it exist. (Decker) is a narrative game structured as an interview for a day trader position.

Oblivious Melodies (Twine) Volume I. is now available to play. @oblivious-melodies

As always, don't forget to check out the submitted entries to the events mentioned in the previous pages. They deserve some love too!

~ NEW RELEASE (WIP) ~

Blood of the Living (CScript), the Field’s of Asphodel sequel is here! The demo is now available for Patreon supporters. @chrysanthemumgames

In Enderbane (CScript) you’ll get to travel back in time from the London of the 1800s to a lush medieval era in Normandy. @enderinthebane

The Beast of Glenkildove has stalked Ireland for centuries. Now, you must hunt it. The Hunter: The Reckoning — The Beast of Glenkildove (CScript) demo is now available.

The Shadow Whisperer (Ren’py) is a visual novel where you get to attend what would have been just another uneventful ball, if only you had not piqued the interest of the mysterious Lord Helderon.

The Soulforge Order (Twine) is a sci-fi fantasy text-based game about becoming an elite warrior that helps to protect the world of Azish. @thesoulforgeorder

In The Empire (CScript) you’re the sole heiress to the great Empire of Ethrean whose expected to be the next ruler. But that is not a title that comes lightly; with assassins, possible backstabbers and increasingly daring rebels, your future is in jeopardy.

So you have a stalker, but he's your type, so what now? Find out by playing Marry My Stalker.

~ UPDATES ~

A Shriek of Ash and Fire (CScript) added extra content to their demo. @krogpile

After Dark (CScript) added the second part of the fifth day of the journey to the demo.

College Tennis: Origin Story (CScript) released Chapter 5 to the public. @collegetennisoriginstory

Grey Swan - Birds of a Rose (CScript) added content to their re-written demo. @reinekes-fox

Incubus (Twine) released Chapter 5. @sonnet009games

Meteoric (CScript) finished Chapter 4.

Misplaced (CScript) released Chapter 8. @calliopefiction

Parasitical (CScript) added new content to the demo. @parasitical-if

The Mighty Shifter (CScript) updated the demo. @miss-briar-novels

The Unbeheaded (CScript) released Chapter 2.

Thicker Than (CScript) released their monthly update. @barbwritesstuff

Virtue's End (CScript) updated the public demo with a part of Chapter 2. @virtues-end

Drink Your Villain Juice (CScript) added new content to their demo. @drinkyourvillainjuice

DEERBOURNE (CScript) added Chapter 2 to their demo. @daisychainfiction

Seven's Deadly (Twine) finished Chapter 3. @sevensdeadly-if

Love the Guard, Be the King (Ren’Py) added new content to their demo. @ligiawrites

Our Life: Now and Forever (Ren’Py) added Patreon beta update that completes the trick or treating adventures of Step 1. @gb-patch

Weeping Gods (CScript) added extra content to Chapter 2. @jcollinswrites

~ OTHER ~

Werewolves 3: Evolution’s End is in need of beta testers.

The VNture podcast is back with another episode! This time talking about festivals in VNs.

~

As always, we apologize in advance for missing any update or release from the past week. We are only volunteers using their limited free time to find as much as we can - but sometimes things pass through the cracks.

If you think something should have been included in this week's zine but did not appear, please shoot us a message! We'll do our best to add it next week! And if you know oncoming news, add it here!

~ MAYBE YOU NEXT? ~

We did not get a submission this week. But if you have an idea for a short essay, or would like a special space to share your thoughts about IF and the community...

Shoot us an email!

~ HIGHLIGHT ON ~

A couple of games that we thought were cool.

Your favourite game here?

Do you have a favourite game that deserves some highlighting?

An old or recent game that wowed you so much you spam it to everyone?

Tell us about it! And it might appear here!

Thank you for the issue! 💗 I found out so many ifs thanks to you guys

- @lacewing707

WE LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU ALL! WHETHER IT'S GOOD OR BAD, OR EVERYTHING IN BETWEEN...

Have something to say? Send us a message titled: Zine Letter!

Everyone’s favourite holiday is upon us, and as a celebration, we in the WNIF team decided to make the next two issues HALLOWEEN THEMED! What does that mean? Aside from a slight graphic change, we will be adding a recommendation section - something of a larger version of the Highlight on... section you’re already used to.

But for that, we will need your help! Is there a game that you love that just screeches "Halloween!" at you? Share it with us and we will include it in one of our Halloween double-issues so all our other readers can check it out as well.

We even have a form for it!

As always, huge thanks to all you readers who liked, shared, and commented on the last issue!

What might be tiny actions are huge support and motivators to us!

Thank you for cheering us on this journey

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

We now have a Linktree! Accessing all of our links has never been easier.

And see you again next week, this time more spooky! (So bring a costume.)

BRIJ, DION, BEX, JEN

WHAT'S NEW IN IF? 2024-ISSUE 25

[chaotic-toasters]

Keep in Touch

If you cried, please let me know. I cried while writing this and now I feel like a wimp

Jen Beattie x Teen!Reader Arsenal WFC x Teen!Reader --------------------

You awoke to the creaking of your bedroom door, followed by the dipping of your bed.

"Hey, kiddo," your mam's voice soft, fingers carding through your hair. "Time to wake up. We've got a big day ahead of us."

You cracked your eyes open, blinking rapidly at the light streaming through your window. "Five more minutes?"

She smiled fondly. "Sorry, kiddo. We've got to finish packing, and then we're gonna meet the girls at Colney one last time before they send us off at the airport."

A few months ago, you and your mam had received almost identical offers from the newest team in the NWSL, Bay FC. Your mam had jumped at the promise of something new, but you'd hesitated.

Arsenal was all you'd ever known. You'd grown up in the academy, winning tournaments left and right before signing your first professional contract for the gunners at fifteen years old.

You had memories of Katie chasing you through the Emirates, practicing pens with Kim, and doing media with Leah. If you left, you wouldn't get to make any more of those memories that were so near and dear to your heart.

It was a difficult decision to make, one that your mam assured you was totally up to you. Any of the girls would take you in in a heartbeat if you wanted to stay.

You hated change, and you hated the position Bay FC's offer put you in. Whether you stayed or left, your life wouldn't be the same.

Stay, and be an ocean away from your mam.

Leave, and abandon everything you'd ever known since you were a wee child.

Stay or leave.

Your mam or your found family.

Pain or pain.

Stay.

Leave.

Stay.

Leave.

Realistically, as much as you dwelled on the decision, the choice was made the second you opened your email.

You could never leave your mam. Your mam who never forced you to do anything you didn't want to. Your mam who always made time for you. Your mam who would stay home from matches or training when you were sick. Your mam who always supported you and loved you.

So, you accepted. You accepted the offer to leave the WSL behind, comforted only by the knowledge that your mam would be right next to you the whole time.

It had hurt to accept the California team's offer, a metaphorical knife to the gut, but your teammates had reminded you that you were still in the early stages of your career and could come back later on. That had brought you some sense of relief, knowing that they would gladly welcome you back if you wanted to return.

But now, on the final day of your life in London, it all came crashing down, and you suddenly did not want to leave.

"O-kayyy," you mumbled, rolling off the bed. "When do we leave? To Colney?"

Your mam extended her hand, pulling you up. "In an hour. Get the rest of your stuff, and we'll have breakfast on the way."

-------------------

"He—oof!" You grunted as someone tackled you into a hug, taking you both to the floor.

"I'm gonna miss you, kiddo," Leah's voice wavered. "So, so much."

You squeezed her tightly. "I'll miss you too, Lee. Who'll make fun of your five year-old diet now?"

Katie joined you on the floor, stealing you from Leah's embrace to pull you into her own. "I will, kid. Don't ye' worry."

Leah wiped away a stray tear. "You remember this, Y/N. Once a gunner, always a gunner. You hear me? You'll always have a place hear at Arsenal."

You smiled sadly as yet another one of your teammates stole you for a hug. "Thanks, Lee. I'm gonna miss you all so, so much."

"She was proper crabbit this mornin'," your mam said with a sad smile of her own. "She cried, yelled at me, cried again, then walked into the door frame because she couldn't see through her tears."

"Maaaam!" You turned red as your teammates laughed. "That didn't happen!"

Kim ruffled your hair. "It's okay, sweetheart. You did that exact thing with a goalpost when you were younger."

You tried unsuccessfully to hold in your laughter. "Kimmy!"

Your mam grinned. "Nothin' I'd rather be doing during my last day as a gunner than making fun of Y/N with you all."

Unfortunately for you, that was all that you and your teammates did for the remainder of your time together. Make fun of you. Oh, to be the baby of the gunners.

-------------------

"I don't want you to leave," Kyra murmured, gripping your shoulders desperately as your flight was called. "You're like... my little sister."

You softened at the uncharacteristically wholesome confession, hugging the Aussie who you'd grown so close to tightly. "Keep in touch, Ky. We'll be sure to visit."

"You promise?" you'd never heard Kyra so vulnerable, not even when Australia had lost to England in the Semifinals and been knocked out of the World Cup.

"I promise. I love you."

"I love you too, Y/N."

It was Kim who scooped you up into a hug last, the Scotswoman practically having watched you grown up since your birth. Your second parent in the absence of your father.

"We'll miss you here, kiddo," she whispered in your ear as you tried to hold back tears. It was almost comical, the short Midfielder having to stand on her tippi toes to do so, barely able to reach you even as you leaned down to hear her. "You'd better call or I'm boardin' the nearest fly to San Francisco and takin' you back home."

You patted her on the back before pulling away, averting your eyes before you started bawling. "I will, Kimmy. I will."

As you and your mam boarded the plane, you shoved your fist into your mout to choke back a sob.

Sitting in your seat, the tearful goodbyes of your teammates echoed in your head. They hadn't wanted you to go, and you hadn't entirely wanted go either, torn between two sides, but you'd known this was the right decision. You'd stay with your mam, broadening your horizons and giving yourself more experience.

Staring out the window, you took in the landscape. The English landscape that you'd known your whole life, left behind as you started a new adventure in the United States.

As the plane took off, Leah's voice echoed in your head.

Once a gunner, always a gunner.

[love-takes-work]

Streamily Signing with Jennifer Paz as Lapis Lazuli and Malachite

Jennifer Paz did a signing through Streamily for fans who bought a signed print. Here are just a few highlights of the stream.

She remembers dressing up as "Bob" for a charity purpose.

She does some line reads that Lapis had in the show.

Lapis was not Jen's first voice over work. She did The Angry Beavers back in the 90s. She's done a lot of ADR work for films. However, Lapis was her first recurring character.

Regarding a fusion between Peridot and Lapis, she didn't think much about that, but she thinks they could work together at a nursery in the barn and being a therapist.

She points out that she can't draw "worth shite" when a fan wanted her to draw on the print, so she just wrote her favorite quote ("I just wanna go home").

Responding to "can you do impressions of other Steven Universe character," she did some callbacks from "The New Crystal Gems," doing "the Garnet" and an Amethyst impression.

In response to someone asking if she auditioned for the role of Amethyst, yes she did audition for Amethyst and recorded the pilot episode for it. They just decided she wasn't the right voice for it. She loves Michaela's take on the character.

She loved the Mary Poppins rendition by Lin Manuel Miranda.

She comments that Steven Universe helped her with her mental health.

She thinks Lapis and Peridot were great as an Odd Couple type.

Her plans for the holidays include in-laws coming in next week and her kid gets to hang out with his grandparents. She loves her in-laws who are coming in from Philly. They love to drink and she's not a drinker.

Can Lapis waterbend people's tears? Yes, Jen thinks she can. Ask Rebecca, though. She could've done something to Blue Diamond with that. Jen loves that Lapis said "I've felt worse."

Jen quotes when Lapis said "No" to "Lapis, fly us in!" She loves that Lapis is a "waterbender" but her humor was so dry. She's getting over being traumatized and just wants others to do their stuff.

She gives some advice for handling adulthood: the only way out of difficult things is through it. If you avoid difficulties they will come back somehow.

She thinks Lapis would enjoy flying a kite.

Wouldn't it be funny if Lapis became Bob the Coach and started a Little League? Maybe she'd say "There's no crying in baseball."

Her favorite character from Steven Universe was Greg.

Lapis did a lot of sleeping and reading to recover from her trauma.

Jen's favorite colors are blue and magenta.

Jen used to not know what "ship" meant in a relationship context and had to find out on Urban Dictionary. She has a Gen Alpha kid now and there are phrases she is forbidden from saying them.

One of her favorite lines from "Hit the Diamond" was "This plan sucks."

Her favorite ship was probably Stevonnie.

She thinks if Steven and Lapis fused it'd be because they were playing catch or hanging out--it would be accidental while playing a sports game.

Someone started a goth band called Cult of Lazuli because of Steven Universe and Lapis. Jen loves this!

She can't commit to saying a favorite song. She agrees that Lapis would secretly listen to Taylor Swift.

She would love Steven Universe to come back but she doesn't know if it will. She'll just say yes, in her opinion it will come back.

Her opinion is that Lapis's water powers are somehow related to Blue Diamond's.

She made a joke about how Cult of Lazuli rocks "because we're rocks."

While signing a Malachite print, she said some stuff toxic relationships and how incredible it was that Lapis dragged Jasper into the sea--but for what? She hopes those who have been in toxic relationships are okay now.

She could not sing in Brazilian Portuguese in response to a request, but she took out a shaker and sang some of "That Distant Shore" in English. She thinks it might be fun to learn it in Brazilian Portuguese and loves the singer who did the voice for the Brazilian dub.

She would love if someone could do fanart of Lapis singing "Home" from The Wiz, or "Home" from Beauty and the Beast--all the music about home should be a Lapis playlist.

She answered what kind of car would Lapis have? She would have an electric car, because as a reformed terraformer, she cares about the Earth now. The car would be a VinFast, "because uh, just because." ;)

She was at one time bald due to alopecia during one of the cons that she had met one of the fans at. She remembers L.A. Comic Con. She was wearing a wig that she referred to "a bob wig." (A "Bob" wig? Heehee!) She found it itchy. She asked Kimberly Brooks and Michaela Dietz if they could tell she was wearing a wig. She was stressed out and ended up recovering through the use of addressing vitamin deficiency. She sends a message of support to anyone struggling with alopecia.

She signs some prints with "I'd love to see your color shining through," "Maybe I'm not alone," and "I just wanna go home."

She shared that her mom's name is Aurora (which was somewhat similar to one of the fans getting a print).

She shares that she loves the Muppets and her favorite characters are "the two curmudgeons in the box seats."

She said "Bob" is a favorite for her and she has a few new items in the shop. Some orders were not made in time to get into this signing, so she wants to schedule another one.

[atheostic]

Atheist YouTube Masterpost (Update 3)

In English

Apostate Aladdin - A look at Islam from an atheist perspective by a former Muslim.

Aron Ra - Mostly posts of his speeches at atheist conferences, responses to religious nonsense, and educational content relating to where the Bible gets science wrong as well as an awesome breakdown of major taxonomic sections.

Atheist Experience - A call-in show where anyone can call in to discuss religion. They prefer theist callers, but atheists who need advice on issues regarding being atheist (e.g. family conflict because of one’s atheism, how/if to come out, etc) are welcome to call in too.

Atheist Lowdown - Atheist Lowdown is a weekly secular news aggregate vlog intended for busy freethinkers, humanists, atheists, agnostics, and any combination thereof who want the latest coverage of religious violence and oppression, the efforts of likeminded nonbelievers, and other related stories. 

Cosmic Skeptic - A place for the discussion of philosophical topics ranging from the crucially important to the trivially interesting.

Dallas Wade – A channel with mostly video essays and reaction videos regarding Christianity.

Dan McClellan - He's said before that he's not an atheist, but he is a Bible scholar and does not flinch away from the immoral passages in the Bible. He also has a podcast called Data Over Dogma.

Forrest Valkai – A channel by an evolutionary biologist where he talks about evolution and science as well as reacts to creationist videos. He’s very funny and friendly and his explanations are very approachable for laypeople of all levels.

Friendly Atheist - The YouTube channel of Hemant Mehta, a former member of the board of directors for Foundation Beyond Belief. He mostly discusses news and has a playlist where he discusses “Everything Wrong In Genesis in the Bible”. He also runs a website, friendlyatheist.com in case you prefer reading to viewing or listening.

Fundie to Frei - An ex-Jewish channel on "advice and awareness about growing up with religious fundamentalism and coping in the "afterlife" transition."

Genetically Modified Skeptic - An atheist look at various issues relating to religion.

Godless Bitches - The Godless Bitches is a podcast focusing on atheist issues from a feminist perspective featuring Vi La Bianca, Jenna Belk, Jen Aldrich, & guests. The show streams every 2nd & 4th Sundays of the month at 6pm directly after The Atheist Experience.

Godless Engineer - Focuses on response to religious videos. Also has a “Bible Study” series.

Godless Granny – “Atheist commentary on the Bible, women’s issues, LGBTQ issues, legal/ political and other current events. Intent is to invite discussion leading to critical thinking about religion and it’s effects on people.” If you’re interested in hearing from an older atheist who deconverted later in life,this is the channel for you.

Gutsick Gibbon – She’s a PhD student in Biological Anthropology, so her main area of interest is human evolution and debunking creationist misinformation. According to her, in her channel you can find content  “concerning primates, general zoology, paleontology, anthropology, and evolutionary biology.”

Holy Koolaid - A channel by Thomas Westbrook (a former Jehovah’s Witness) that features news, discussions about the Bible, discussions about the historicity of events in the Bible, and more. He has a playlist for “Nothing Fails Like Bible History” and also often looks at religious cults.

JaclynGlenn -  An atheist who talks about a variety of topics.

JeGaysus – I’m not really sure if he’s atheist (sometimes I think he might be, other times I’m not sure), but his gay Jesus persona is too funny not to share.

Jimmy Snow - A show with a mix of subject material, typically dealing with atheism and LGBT+-related stuff.

John Cedars - A range of videos aimed at dissecting the various teachings of Jehovah's Witnesses, as well as new developments in the religion. In particular, he tries to keep on top of the latest propaganda released by Watchtower by way of video rebuttals as much as possible.

Kristi Burke - An ex-Evangelical who discusses religion and atheism (mainly focuses on Christianity when talking about religion).

The Line - A call-in show similar to Atheist Experience started by Jimmy Snow.

Logicked – “Entertaining responses to bad arguments, with a focus on atheism and debunking religion.”

Matt Dillahunty - Matt Dillahunty’s personal YT channel.

Non-Prophets - The Non-Prophets focuses on atheism and the separation of church and state.

NonStampCollector - Lots of fantastic little animations regarding atheism.

Parenting Beyond Belief - Parenting Beyond Belief is a live call-in show every 2nd and 4th Saturday at 1pm Central dedicated to peer support and guidance for secular parents and those wanting to learn more about non-religious families.

Paulogia -  A former Christian takes a look at the claims of Christians, wherever science is being denied in the name of ancient books.

Professor Stick - Mostly does reply videos to debunk pseudoscience on the internet.

Prophet of Zod - Everything from satirical atheist cartoons to a guy with a static head and no discernible facial features talking about atheism-related stuff. His most popular section is a series on “Dumb Things People Say to Atheists”, where he very calmly and respectfully explains why what the thing is dumb and how best to respond.

Rachel Oates - A channel which deals with a variety of sujects, from poetry to atheist news to book reviews of religious books and more. 

Secular Sexuality -  Secular Sexuality is a weekly call-in show live from Austin, Texas every Thursday at 7pm CT where they talk about sex from a secular perspective.

Shannon Q - An atheist who talks about a variety of topics.

Secular Spirit - An ex-Muslim who talks about religion and atheism.

Sir Sic – A reaction video channel where the host is a cartoon knight.

Skeptics & Scoundrels – A very new channel by an atheist ex-JW. I personally like him already. Before talking about why he disagrees with the paster he’s responding to, he makes a point of finding something nice to say about the person (“Your beard is cool – baby birds could nest in that thing!”), which I think it’s a neat and unique approach. He doesn’t have a lot of videos yet but give it time. :)

The SkepTick – A pretty fun channel of mostly reaction vids reacting to religious videos.

Sound of Science – Mostly a reaction video blog regarding unscientific beliefs.

Suris the Skeptic - He tackle issues of religion, morality, philosophy, and a touch of science.

Talk Heathen - Talk Heathen is a weekly call-in television show in Austin, Texas geared toward long-form and on-going dialogue with theists & atheists about religion, theism, & secularism.

Telltale - Typically looks at cults and religion-related news.

The Thinking Atheist – Typically video essays and the visual version of a podcast by the same name. The host’s voice sounds exactly like an old-timey radio announcer. lol

TMM – A channel mostly featuring reactions to Christian content.

Truth Wanted - A show similar to Atheist Experience and Talk Heathen, it focuses on how and why people believe what they believe, and how you can talk about beliefs in more effective ways.

Viced Rhino - Response videos to pseudo-scientific nonsense on YouTube.

Em português

Antônio Miranda - Teologia Reversa - Videos sobre contradições Bíblicas, mentiras contadas sobre a Bíblia, origem dos mitos cristãos, etc.

Canal do Pirulla - Um canal brasileiro sobre ateismo, ciências, e evolução.

David Ribeiro - Canal focado em Filosofia da Religião. Ele não produz tantos vídeos, infelizmente, mas ainda pode ser interessante.

Prazer, Karnal - Canal de um professor de história social da USP. Ele tende a concentrar em discutir filosofia mas também tem videos sobre religião.

Prof. Daniel Gontijo - O canal é bem focado em psicologia - em especial psicologia da religião.

[brooooswriting]

Hello broko loco it's been a minute.

So this idea just came to mind.

How about a Mafia AU.

Jenna x Mafia leader FR

So how about Jenna getting kidnapped by R's rivals and that's when she actually finds out r is part of the Mafia. Her being taken away, then R finds out before the other bitches make demands because... connections. And she goes on a killing spree just to save her girl.

Then they talk about everything [tragic backstory intestifies (only if you feel like it)] and Jenna ends up falling asleep in R's arms due to being exhausted.

Feel free to delete this if it makes you uncomfortable. Take your time ik you have situation pt 6 on the way that's why I'm insisting on this.

And I hope you have a great day<3

Should have told ya

Jenna Ortega x Mafia leader reader

A/n: I don’t know shit about the mafia and I couldn’t really find anything online that made sense to me😂

There was a part of your life that you didn’t like to talk about and you didn’t want people to know about. Sure that sounds drastic but everybody who knew was in danger too, so you liked to keep to yourself. You actually did in general, until you met a certain actress. You ran into each other when one of your newbies fucked up, you and your crew were in a hurry and one of them ran into her. In General no problem but you didn’t like the fact that he didn’t say sorry, sure you were a mafia boss but that doesn’t mean that you guys can’t be polite. Especially after you saw how pretty the girl was, you let the others walk past you as you hurried back to say that you’re sorry. And somehow a relationship built from that.

You still never told her that you were part of the mafia, let alone that you were the boss. Your mafia was kinda different thou, you didn’t like killing people for nothing and you didn’t like the rivalry between the different mafias, you believe that you did more of a good thing. You still killed people and did some dirty stuff but a lot of them were people who abused kids, rapists or stuff like that. Because let’s be honest, the law system was shit and someone had to do something.

But there were people who had problems with that, especially another mafia group in California. You liked to believe that this was the only useless blood flowing you were the cause off.

“Baby?” You called as you walked into your house, Jenna was waiting for you after a long day of work, you couldn’t wait to see her. “Jen?” You called out again, your voice louder this time, but there was still no answer. You called out again and again, dialing her number walking trough every room, she was nowhere to find, you even started calling her co stars but nobody knew where she was. You couldn’t help but panic as you called in some of your members, hoping that they would help you find her. It only got worse when you found a envelope in front of your house with headphones in it.

After around 20 minutes you sent 12 troops of 3 out to look for her all around the city, you and four others tried to track her. There was no luck in tracking her phone, it was either turned off or destroyed, but you did have luck when you hacked into some cameras of your rivals where you found Jenna sitting in an abandoned building, tears streaming down her face. Your blood boiled with anger, you immediately called everybody to the location, this was gonna be their end.

After around 10 black cars pulled up to the house you entered. They were checking each room, you darting for the living room where you thought she’d be but there was only one person, Tom, second man of your rivals. “Where is she?” You growled at him, having problems keeping your anger at bay. “You really thought we were gonna keep her here? You’ll give us what we want and then maybe, just maybe, you’ll see her again” that was enough for you, you nodded at Mike, your second man, who grabbed Tom to hold him still.

After you’ve punched him around 20 times his face was bloody, his nose and jaw broken but he still wouldn’t talk and it fueled your anger. “You know what, I’m over this and I’m over playing nice. Torture him until he talks and if he doesn’t? Kill him.” Suddenly the guy was panicked, you weren’t known for torture and you seemed so serious that it scared the shit out of him.

Not even 15 minutes after you’ve left you heard him call you causing you to grin. “Now you wanna talk?” You asked as you entered with a smile, “yes, she’s at the warehouse down south” he was heaving, tears streaming down his face while yours held a smile. “Good, keep him here, if she’s not there, kill him” after you hit him one more time you left with 10 more people.

“Alright, this time no talking. Me and Mike are going in and if there’s a problem I’m calling back up alright? Somebody gets in your way? Kill them, nobody takes my girl” everybody was surprised by your behavior, you normally were pretty chill and laid back and you never got close to anyone really. “We are going in”

You kicked in the door, making your presence known as two people already came running towards you. Each of you fought one to the ground, you slicing the throat of yours. It went like that until you had around 10 people down, most of them dead. After you killed the last one you finally saw her, they had stuffed her mouth, tied her to a chair and ripped her shirt to the point where you could see her bra. Their leader, Paul, a complete ass, stood in front of her saying something that made her whimper which made you growl.

You nodded at Mike before running off and tackling their boss to the ground, a surprised sound coming from the girl next to you. While you repeatedly hit the man under you, Mike cut the ropes to free the smaller girl who cowered next to him, the guy she knew as your best friend. “Never. Touch. My. Girl. Again” you stressed each word with a harsh hit to his face before finally standing up to look at Jenna.

“Are you alright baby?” Your voice immediately went soft when you talked to her, your hands reaching for her waist while hers landed on your shoulder. “You’re part of the fucking mafia” she gasped slightly pushing you away from her, “you’re not just a part, you’re the fucking boss” you studied her face as your thumb rubbed circles over her waist. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, I thought it was saver when you didn’t know, I’m so sorry baby” you told her but she only shook her head. “Let’s just get out of here” she grumbled and walked away causing you to sigh. “Mike, go with her. She shouldn’t be alone right now” you told him as you knew that she didn’t wanna see you right now.

Mike jogged towards her until he was next to her, “you’re a part of this too huh?” She said looking straight toward. “Yes, but you shouldn’t be too harsh on y/n. She was scared of you getting hurt and when you disappeared today? It was the first time in 19 years that I saw her really scared, she would have blown up the whole damn world to find you” he explained as they walked up to your car. Jenna’s heart sank when she heard that, it did kind of make sense that you didn’t tell her but today really was a shock.

“I’m gonna let somebody drive you home… to your home and there’s gonna be someone stationed in front of your house the whole time” you told her as you opened the door for her as she nodded. “Goodbye Jenna, im sorry” you mumbled again before closing the door. Her heart sank again when you closed the door, the whole thing sounded like a forever goodbye. She hoped that you’d come to her house in a different car, but you didn’t.

She waited a whole hour before calling you. “Jenna? Are you alright?” You quickly rushed out the words as soon as you picked up the phone, “no! You’re gonna get your ass here and we are gonna talk about everything” you sighed, “Jen-“ “Stop it! Get your ass here right now” this time you didn’t protest, you said your goodbye and walked to your car.

When she opened the door for you, your heart sped up. She was wearing one of your hoodies that went to her knees which made her look adorable. “Come in” she said as she pulled you to the couch. “Talk” you chuckled at her bossiness but started nonetheless.

“My parents were shot in a mafia fight when I was 8, I was alone in their restaurant sitting next to their dead bodies when an old man came inside. Just minutes before I saw him trying to protect my parents, he introduced himself as Frank, saying that he knew my parents and that he was very sorry for their death and that he’d like me to come with him. He’d take care of me and he did, he did more than I could have asked for. Years later, I believe I was 14 I learned that he was the reason my family died, he was the reason they were involved in it. But I couldn’t be mad at him, my father decided to join on his own, he was a grown man after all and he tried to do good.” you took a deep breath, talking about your parents was still hard for you. Jenna noticed and slightly curled herself into you, the heat and the familiar feeling that radiated off of her comforted you. “Frank retired 5 years ago, making me the boss as I was like his daughter, I learned everything about it since he took care of me. We always tried to make this a better place which some of the other mafia groups didn’t like, which is what brings us to today. I never told you because I thought I could keep you safe that way, my dad told my mom and she died because of it. You’re my first relationship since I’ve been 15, I was always too afraid of putting them in danger. Until you came, you had this hold on me that I just couldn’t break your heart” you finished as tears welled in your eyes.

“Oh honey” Jenna sat herself on your lap with her arms around your neck pressing your face into her chest as you silently cried. “I get that you didn’t tell me but next time, just be honest so I know what I’d get myself into. I still would be here you know?” She pulled your head up to kiss you, you immediately kissed her back as your arms tightened around her waist to pull her closer. “I love you Jenna” you whispered against her lips, making her smile, “I love you too my little mafia boss” both of you giggled before she settled into your arms in a more comfortable position. You just held her for a moment, happy that she was still with you and that she was fine. “I wanna meet Frank this week” she mumbled sleepily and not even 2 minutes later she was asleep on top of you causing your heart to melt.

You carefully moved until you were laying on the couch with her laying on top of you, you kissed her head before closing your eyes too.

She is going to make a great mafia boss

[fishenjoyer1]

I'm just starting to get into marine bio, and I found your blog today and I love it so much!! Do you have any recommendations of where I can learn stuff? (I hunger for fish knowledge)

It's always wonderful when someone else starts getting into marine bio, I'm honored to share resources!

Texts:

I personally learned a lot of what I now know from a series of textbooks I've picked up over the years, here some of my personal favorites!

Biological Oceanography An Introduction by Carol M. Lalli & Timothy R. Parsons: I personally found this textbook wonderful! Written very clearly and easy to understand, and contains summaries at the end of each chapter. Here is my favorite used&new book sellers results for this book. Here is the book on internet archive.

Marine Ecology: Processes, Systems, and Impacts by Michael J. Kaiser, Martin J. Attrill, & Simon Jennings: Covers much of the same things as biological oceanography, but valuable on its own. Here is the link to buy a copy for cheap. Here is the book on internet archive.

Limnology: Lake and River Ecosystems by Robert G. Wetzel: I personally found this the most dull textbook of my life, but, it is written very well. The chapters end with summaries also, which makes it easier to study, and this book is rather well renowned in freshwater studies. Here to buy a copy on my favorite book website. Here to read on internet archive (I'm relatively uncertain that its inaccessible) so Here is a preview on google books. (maybe I'll find the time to scan my copy and put it in a google drive)

The Diversity Of Fishes: Biology, Evolution, and Ecology by Douglas E. Facey, Brian W. Bowen, Bruce B. Collette, & Gene S. Helfman: I adore this textbook, it is easy to read and comprehend, a personal favorite. Not only that, it is wonderful for understanding fish. Here you can buy it (it's a bit pricey, so I recommend just using the internet archive). Here you can find it on internet archive.

Methods for Fish Biology by Stephen Midway, Caleb Hasler, and Prosanta Chakrabarty: A bit dense and hard to read, but it's a wonderful text on understanding how to do research, and how a lot of farming and understanding of fish is done. Here to buy it. Here to read it on internet archive

All the other textbooks I own are about marine mammals, so I'll recommend them if asked, but you seem more interested in fish and aquatic environments.

Audio:

I personally struggle to listen to informational audio and podcasts, so this section is a bit threadbare

The Marine Mammal Science podcoast by The Society for Marine Mammalogy here

Marine Biology in 5 minutes podcast here

Oceanlovers podcast here

The Deep-Sea Podcast here

Video:

I have some great recommendations I'm a personal fan of here!

I personally really enjoy Natural World Facts, he has some wonderful playlists and documentaries on the deep sea, different environments, animals, and ecosystems there.

MBARI (the Monterey Bay Aquarium Research Institute) Has wonderful videos with their discoveries and research,

The Nautilus live, which does frequent live streams as they're exploring the ocean with ROVs and a running commentary from the staff!

The octopus lady does some good work, I haven't watched the most of her but she's relatively fun to put in the background to just generally learn about things marine

I also enjoy the work of AVNJ Fish Biologist, who does a lot less serious scientific videos, but he also has a video series on ichthyology I'm fond of so, check that out here!

Other:

when doing fish of the day, some sources have continually come back again and again, I'll list these off first.

Wikipedia: I personally find the wikipedia is a good resource, but it never gives the full picture when your trying to learn. Do not base your knowledge only on wikipedia, i recommend trying to read through some of the sources that wikipedia has listed on a topic, and if you are new to a subject I suggest trying to find introductory textbook before plunging in head first. I find that wikipedia is wonderful at convincing you that you know what its talking about, as it's very easy to just read without knowing the definition for a small handful of words. But, you will quickly come to realize at some point or another that you understood less than you think. As much as it is a wonderful tool, don't use it exclusive well learning

WoRMS- World Registrar of Marine Species has basic info and distinguishes between species, along with some good research, I'd recommend checking them out!

Fishbase! contains good information on most fish

.gov websites, and websites that align with governments across the world can be trusted for fish purposes mostly, the NOAA is a great resource for learning and searching info on animals, as is the Monterey Bay Aquarium

If you're looking to find a scientific paper, I recommend searching on google scholar, as it will show you which you can access the pdf of without paying.

And, if your looking to come into contact with papers you just cant seem to find the pdf of, I would recommend Scihub other than scihub, you can also look for any number of things locked behind a paywall with this niffty website I found ! A lot of resources there.

That's everything I can think of! Have a good time learning ! :)

[pizza-splitter]

I was testing streaming stuff to get some things working, was playing Tactical Breach Wizards. Its a funny game. Jen is often a vibe.

[elliewiltarwyn]

infopost

hello! this is a sideblog for my three FFXIV Warriors of Light OCs, as seen above, so i can put them in a jar and shake them a lot, watch them rotate in a microwave, and other such things we do with our blorbos.

i do some gposing, rant about my girls, and reblog everything from others' gposes and gushing about their WoLs to shitposts and dumb jokes about this award-winning mmo with a free trial up to level 70 including the first two award-winning expansions and no restrictions on playtime.

my likes and follows come from my main blog @wildknightblaze which is just my normal life shit, you don't have to follow that one lol

blog tags include:

#my ocs: ellie wiltarwyn, #my ocs: mia longhart, #my ocs: lilyana tsuki - main focus tags for each of my three wols, if someone wants to look at a specific one.

#oc loreposting, #ask games, and #tag games for the sort of character-building stuff i usually get from prompts or friends' questions

#ffxiv gpose - not a blog-specific tag, but it's what i put on all of my gposes

#my fanfiction - not quite as much use as gpose, but i do occasionally write stuff and put this on it! includes ao3 works, whatever spontaneous writing inspiration i get, and FFXIV Write entries

#ellie's ramblings - whatever other ffxiv-related musings i might have about playing the game or the story or anything else

re: spoilers, i tend to stick to the unofficial two-week embargo after patch releases and will tag them with "#[expansion name] spoilers" and "#patch [Y.X] spoilers" for some time afterwards. i do still tend to yap about stuff in the current state of the game untagged, so use discretion if you wish to remain spoiler-free.

I also play the game's savage raids with my static as they come out, and stream our progress on my Twitch channel, mostly for archival purposes and so our FC members can watch. currently* we raid on Sunday and Tuesday evenings, usually from 9:30 PM-12:00AM US Eastern time. *well, as of this writing (January 2025) we are done with the raid tier and are sort of in hibernation until the next one, though I may also consider streaming Ultimate prog if we get into it!

as for the WoLs themselves:

Elilgeim "Ellie" Wiltarwyn

The most well-known of the trio of Warriors of Light, Elilgeim grew up in Limsa Lominsa with lofty dreams of higher education and bettering the world, only to be rejected by the Studium and lose both her parents in the same day. She ran away from home and weathered the Sixth Umbral Calamity on the streets of Ul'dah, eventually making her way to Gridania to start over as a novice conjurer and rebuild her life. Fast-forward six years and she's the strongest member of the Scions of the Seventh Dawn, dubbed Ellie by her co-Warrior of Light Mia and having taken the vanguard as a dark knight and multiple styles of melee combat in order to save the star and its shards from varying threats on numerous occasions. Even after achieving such victories, she's not about to let her thirst for adventure go unsatisfied. Yet for all that fame, she tries to keep a low profile and only truly relaxes in good company, where a seemingly grouchy and cold exterior gives way to a self-confident, easily amused, and deeply caring inner self.

She may care a little too obviously, though; tales abound of her doomed romances with multiple notable women of historical import to these worldly conflicts. While some range from truth-adjacent to flat-out fanciful faerie tales, only her closest friends know she's happily married to her co-Warriors of Light after far too many years of mutual pining.

-----

Mia Longhart

As far as anyone could tell, Mia sprang fully-formed into existence as a member of Ul'dah's Gladiators' Guild, earning her keep on the bloodsands and eventually becoming the first swordswoman to claim the mantle of free paladin in decades. It's only deep into the battle against the XIVth Legion of Garlemald that it comes out that she too is Garlean, born and raised Maia jen Asina, having fled the empire after growing discontent with its colonialist ambitions. No one doubts her commitment to the fight against the Empire, however, which she drives forward with a levelheaded temperament, endless kindness to her peers and allies, and an incorruptible moral compass. Events in the First and a reckoning with the origin of her soul and its relation to the Ascian Emet-Selch shake her to her core, but with the support of her friends and the love of her co-Warriors of Light, she forges on, willing to shoulder burdens so her friends don't have to - which is how she ends up forming a pact with the voidsent whose strength Ellie used to fell Zenos viator Galvus. Coming to grips with the complicated tapestry of her homeland's history, she takes up the art of the reaper and the scythe that killed Zenos to prepare for any future battles she must fight.

-----

Lilyana Tsuki

Born L'ilyana Shuru, she left home after traumatic events and escaped to Vylbrand, where she took a job waitressing at the Bismarck for some time before falling in with Limsa Lominsa's secret Rogues' Guild. After saving the Mizzenmast from destruction with them, she is recruited into the Scions alongside Elilgeim and Mia as another one blessed with the Echo, fighting by their side to become one of the three Warriors of Light. She has a bright and cheery air and is always smiling, supportive, and enthusiastic, managing to charm even the cold-shouldered Elilgeim, but the trauma of the past weighs heavy on her heart, crippling her with a lack of self-esteem and a deep-seated belief that she will never be good or worthy enough. It's not till she admits what and who is important to her that she is able to stand on her own two feet and reach out to take what she wants. Though she is a master of stealth and by far the most agile and light-footed of the Warriors of Light, when she finds happiness she feels motivated to express her creative side and takes up the art of pictomancy alongside her friend Krile.

[smolwritingchick]

The Bangtan Gal Chapter 86- WINGS 8

Chapter Summary: After 3 years, Jennie finally dyes her hair for a BTS comeback and films her WINGS 8 Concept video.

Words: 9,000+

Author's Note: Some smol angst regarding Jimin's diet during the BST era. And mentions of anxiety. I apologize in advance :(

I'm going to create a smol chapter when it's around that time for the love yourself videos. I'd like to put my spin on it, not going too much into the crazy theories. I'm hoping to write more of Jen's story for it. And I wonder if I made it obvious who found Jennie for her WINGS video at the end of the chapter. I'll write about all that when it's around 2017 in the story. Some ideas sparked in my head when those videos were released years ago and I kept them in my old documents. I gotta revisit them and check out everything. 

 I had thought of this idea for her concept video and decided to just stick with it and have fun with it instead of stressing about making her fit "perfectly" in this comeback. Supernatural type of shiz. And I did some research on using a Damien quote from the book to add to it. I think it fits quite well imo.

I lost count of how many times I changed Jennie's WINGS song. It's getting ridiculous at this point. But for this, I decided to go a different route. Jennie has said that she wants to be a versatile artist, especially as she looked up to Rihanna as an inspiration for that, singing in different genres. 

I LOVE PVRIS! One of my favorite groups. I'm not too big on their new music and the direction they're going musically these days but am always vibing to their old stuff. I truly miss their old sound tbh.

I decided to choose a song called I Don't Wanna Do This Anymore from PVRIS' latest album, for Jen's song. I really like the vibe as it would showcase her skills on the launchpad and I love the lyrics. I'll probably switch it up a little bit. I wanted her song for WINGS to be blunt and a bit sad. Like literally she is telling people she does not want to do this anymore. She does not want to perform, she does not want to be famous, she wants out, which was how she felt during the situation of her sister's play and getting mobbed by all those people. So, she'll express those negative feelings in the song. And I thought of her changing the lyrics to be more optimistic as the song goes on. Maybe for the chorus. I even thought of the fan chant ARMY would do. She would sing negatively, and they'd respond positively. For instance, when RM sang "I wish I could love myself." for Reflection and ARMY shouted, "WE LOVE YOU!"

So yeah, I think that's it. I'm rambling but I'm not going to overthink it too much when it comes to her song for this album. I had a vision for her WINGS video and I kind of hope it makes sense. So I'm just going to go with the flow :) Happy reading!!

--------

Jennie made it back to America safely and Facetimed the boys to let them know. She was lying on her bed, feeling the jetlag as the boys expressed how much they were already missing her. After speaking to them, she finally had one on one time with Yoongi.

"And thanks again for the cookies. I tried to make them stretch but it was too good," he said. "Now I have to impatiently wait for you to return to make me some more,"

She giggled at that. "Sounds like a plan. I'm happy the mixtape is being well received,"

"Me too. So many streams on SoundCloud. Thank you again for your help,"

"Always. I knew it would do well,"

Once July 31/August 1 hit, How's This was finally released and Jennie got to watch the two Music Videos as well as the jacket shooting. She and Hyuna looked fun and the visuals were astounding. Now, of course, there were those kinds of fans that would complain that Jennie was acting 'too grown'. She already saw tweets about it with fans babying her and saying that she shouldn't act too sexy. But she chose to ignore it and just enjoy what she and Hyuna created.

She thought about the filming as she watched the jacket shooting video.

-------

Dressed in one of many outfits for the video, Jennie and Hyuna awaited instructions while they stood on the set that resembled a club different from the first music video.

"I'm getting more comfortable with this sexy vibe because of you. Doing this with you, I feel at ease. So, I am so stoked to be here with you today," Jennie told her with a smile.

Hyuna looked relieved. "I'm happy. I was a little nervous asking you if you wanted to do this. I sighed out of relief when I got confirmation that this collab was a go,"

When they saw that Cube wanted to film a documentary on this music video, they waved at the camera.

"Today Jennie is with me to film! I am so happy that she is a part of this fun song," Hyuna said, clapping her hands.

"Hi~!" Jennie hugged her from behind, waving to the camera. "We are ready to shoot~!"

"This is going to be fun! Stay tuned!"

Jennie let go of her and cheered, "Fighting!"

"Fighting!" she high fived her.

Jennie was filmed first and they started with shots of her being sexy and having fun inside the club while lip-syncing the song. Walking through the club, she met up with Hyuna who danced along with her. For How's This with the version with Jennie in it, the choreography was different and looked more fluid instead of all the body shaking. In Jen's opinion, this choreography fit better for the song after working on new moves with Hyuna. They performed the choreography in the crowd and then did some twerking shots.

As the crew prepared for the next take, the camera showed Jen and Hyuna talking again.

"How was the first music video shoot?" Jennie asked.

"It was fun! It went well. I kissed one of the guys on camera," Hyuna felt flustered about the mature kiss.

"OOP!" Jen covered her mouth, making her giggle and hold onto her. She turned to the camera and repeated herself, "OOP!"

For another shot, after an outfit change, Hyuna and Jennie danced together behind a background. It reminded them of a honeycomb as they lip-synced.

Before Jen knew it, she was in the area she wanted to film at the most. The DJ booth.

"My happy place. Look at it. I am in love," she pointed over to the DJ booth. "Errbody throw yo hands up, we getting' hot, hot, hot, hotter!" she sang her verse from fire cutely before giggling.

When filming commenced, she approached the DJ and asked if she could take over. Winking at him, she placed the headset on and began mixing for the party while dancing around. The party got more lively once she began to DJ while Hyuna joined her as they lip-synced the chorus.

eottae igeon eottae

eottae chumchuja

Up dwae igeon Up dwae

Up dwae chumchuja

Jen was filmed all over the place for her shots. Hyuna had a lot of shots already from the previous music video and Cube just needed more Jen and then her together with Hyuna. Shots consisted of her lying across a table while lip-syncing, dancing on the table, then filmed against the wall as she flipped her hair and swayed her hips around.

"Is this too much?" Jen giggled as she watched her shots with Hyuna.

'As if looks could kill. Her piercing gaze against the screen flusters Jennie'

"Oh no, I bit my lip," she laughed. "I didn't even notice. Pure instinct. We look good, though,"

The last shot consisted of a dance battle. Jennie had a group of black dancers with her against Hyuna and her dancers.

----------

Jennie smiled at the memory and was excited to perform it live near award season. After watching the videos, she scrolled through Twitter and saw what was going on. BlackPink had recently debuted and she loved their debut music videos. Although she was still hurt about 2NE1, she loved seeing new groups debut.

But because one of the BlackPink members was also named Jennie, it started some fan wars, which made no sense at all.

'Netizens compare BTS' Jennie to BlackPink's Jennie. Who is better?' read the latest controversial ALLKPOP article.

It didn't sit right with BlackPink and BTS fans as the comment section was filled with mixed reactions. It was drama waiting to explode.

'So we have a Black Jennie and a Korean Jennie'

'There can only be ONE Jennie and I choose BTS' Jennie'

'BP's Jennie is what BTS' Jennie wishes she was'

'Ugh STOP already'

'I think BTS' Jennie is better.'

'BP's Jennie has more charisma. BTS' Jennie still hasn't shown what she is all about. Her part in fire was cute but I wish she did more. I kinda gave up on her as my bias and moved on to Jimin'

'LOL I bet BTS' Jennie is threatened by BP's Jennie'

'BlackPink's Jennie showed more effort and energy in her debut than BTS' Jennie. Just stating facts. I'd take BlackPink's debut over BTS' any day'

'Jennie and Jennie. I love it. I hope they meet'

'Are you serious?!'

'Ew wtf is this article?'

'BlackPink's Jennie is still a rookie. She has a long way to go before getting up to BTS' Jennie's level'

'Can you not? This is disrespectful to both girls. They both are doing great'

'I'm tired of people comparing groups. Just love and support both'

'I hope they become friends'

'Eh...BP's Jennie is better and prettier. She wears better outfits too. BTS' Jennie has been looking rough for a while. She gained a few pounds too. I miss her debut look'

'Who cares? They both flop'

'BlackPink's Jennie ain't even all that.'

'The difference is BlackPink's Jennie knows how to rap. BTS' Jennie's little Full Moon cover wasn't that great. She annoying af'

'BTS' Jennie just doesn't have that IT factor like BP's Jennie does.'

'I like Blackpink's Jennie more'

''Stop pitting women against women. It's disgusting'

'Delete this article. They're both great'

Jennie frowned and rolled her eyes at the name of the article and scrolled past to look at something more positive. It seemed like they were trying to get her to reply and react but she refused. First, they did this with Alex Reid, and now BlackPink's Jennie. It needed to stop. She was not going to be the "mean girl" that the media wanted her to be and make people think that she hated or was jealous of other female idols like Alex and Jennie Kim.

The last thing she was going to do was let the media try to make her think negatively about someone whom she hadn't met. She refused to be sucked into this jealous and petty scenario with BlackPink's Jennie. She was excited about what BlackPink would be doing and wished the best for them.

Suddenly she received a notification from V-Live about Hobi going live and began to watch it.

"Oh, that's right. Bangtan is in Japan for their concerts," she murmured.

"We had our concert, tonight. It didn't feel the same without Munchkin with us. Jennie, if you are watching, I hope you are doing well," Hobi said on camera in his hotel room.

"Doing good, missing you guys," she sighed.

But then something weird happened on the live. The comments started bringing up other members. Fans then began to ask for Jungkook, V, Jimin, and Yoongi.

"No, they didn't..." Jennie looked on in disbelief at the comments.

All Hobi wanted was to spend time with Armies and now this happened. It made her upset and then she watched as he went to Jimin's room and then left abruptly after a few minutes. Jimin was also stunned because it was Hobi's phone on the live so what in the world?

Unable to keep her thoughts to herself, she went to Twitter to tweet about it.

'Are you KIDDING me? Did you REALLY just ask for other members while J-Hope was trying to talk to you? #Jen'

'No, like really the amount of disrespect is completely unacceptable. The hell is wrong with some of y'all? #Jen'

'You got me ALL the way f'ed up! Don't ever do that to Hobi #Jen'

'We take time out of our day to talk to you one on one but you ask for the others? You need to consider our feelings and how bad it makes us feel. #Jen'

Her tweets blew up and spread like wildfire as fans were commenting sorry and tweeted sad emojis. A lot agreed with her tweets while some others began to complain that she was overreacting.

'I know right!? Like how dare them?!'

'Ennie, we're sorry'

'These fans are so disrespectful. Please don't think all ARMY are like this.'

'I am so bothered by them doing that crap.'

'omg shut up,'

'You must be one of them asking for other members if you're telling her to shut up. YOU shut up! Jennie is speaking facts!'

'What are you so extra for? Calm down,'

'Here she goes always sticking her nose in everyone's business. All the way in America. Just stay in America and go away,'

'I cannot believe they did that. Ugh'

'GO OFF SIS! This infuriates me! Hobi don't deserve this'

'I'm so sad...'

'We don't deserve him'

'I cannot believe this. And they call themselves an Army?'

'Yeah...my heart is broken'

'IM SOOOOO MAD!'

'The sweetest sunshine ever and gets treated like this. I want to cry'

Jen then tweeted one final tweet before going on a social media break.

'ARMY, don't apologize to me. Apologize to Hobi...#Jen'

Later that evening after Jimin ended the live that was supposed to be him and Hobi, she facetimed him after he got his phone back.

"Hey, Jennie," J-Hope greeted with a fake smile but she saw right through it.

"Nah uh. Don't do that. Screw them for making you feel like that,"

"It's okay. Don't worry about it," he shook his head. "They just want to see the other members,"

"No. I will worry about it. You're upset and bummed out. I understand. I wish I was there to take you out and treat you to food or something. That was so rude of them and they are so ungrateful. Those aren't real fans. Don't let them get to you, okay? You have real fans who love and appreciate you. Love and respect you. Love and support you," she went on as he listened.

"Hobi, they can call me annoying or whatever for my tweets, I don't care. What just happened was wrong and unfair," she declared. "And if you don't want to be vocal about it, then I will because I refuse to sit here and let people do this to you. You don't deserve that. You should get just as much love and affection as the rest of us. I love and cherish you. Always. Don't ever forget that. I'm going to always have your back,"

Hobi broke out into a huge smile at her words and began to feel better. "Thank you, Jennie. I appreciate you cheering me up,"

--------

While being home, Jen spent the majority of her time in her room which was also her mini studio. Although she wasn't physically there with the group to work on their upcoming album, she still did her part and sent in her vocals and instrumentals.

For the WINGS album, she was going to be more involved in the music. For now, everyone is focused on their solo songs. She was first involved in working on Jungkook's song, Begin. Since she had been home, Jungkook had sent her his vocals and asked if he sounded OK. Every time was better than the last which boosted his confidence as he recorded. Jennie's role in his song was to play the guitar.

With her headphones on her ears, she played the guitar smoothly under his angelic vocals. Begin was about his journey to Seoul and meeting Bangtan. It was beautiful. The lyrics did not mention her but talked more about the rest of the boys. His brothers. Jungkook kept apologizing to her about it and said he had something planned for her in the future. She was not bothered by it at all and understood. If anything, her curiosity towards what he had planned for her rose as she thought about what he was going to do.

After sending the music back to Big Hit, she got confirmation that it was great and continued working on the rest of her assigned songs. Next up was Jimin's song called Lie. She worked on the background vocals and guitar for his song. Out of every solo song by the guys, this one was her favorite and she was so proud of him for his efforts. She couldn't help but smile as she listened to the demo track after putting her recorded guitar chords in it.

Closing her eyes, she began to focus on the emotion of the song and pondered on her background vocals. This song was about lying and the conflict due to lies and temptation. So, she wanted to try to have some emotion and desperation in her vocals to fit the tone. She recorded her light breathy 'yeahs' in the beginning and sang 'Naega malhae' under his voice.

Be smooth like a like a snake

beoseonago sipeunde

Hearing an opening instrumental part after his voice, she hummed but shook her head, stopping the song.

"Nah...maybe it should be better. Humming is too common. I should do something different," she pondered, taking off her headphones.

She spent the next hour working on what would fit during that part. Her notebook with crossed out words and random lyrics was all over her papers as she worked on thinking what would work for his song. She wanted something to pop and to be memorable.

"Ah...woo...woo." she wrote down. 

She began to sing it out several times in diverse ways until she found a tone that fit with the song. 

"I should make it a little haunting when I edit it. A tad bit of autotune or something..."

Putting her headphones back on, she stood by her microphone and pressed record as it played Jimin's song. The first opening notes were clear enough to give listeners one hell of an eargasm. The producers that put the violin and other string instruments were geniuses.

"Yeah," she said in a high, breathy tone while looking at her notebook in her hands.

As soon as Jimin's voice filled her ears, she sang softly under his vocals, "Naege malhae..."

Neoui dalkomhan misoro naege

"Naege malhae..."

soksagideut nae gwitgae malhae

"Yeah. Don't be like a prey, be smooth like a like a snake,"

beoseonago sipeunde

Finding that inner strength in her voice, she belted out, "Ah woo woo~"

naegeseo tteona tteona tteonajwo

naegeseo tteona tteonajwo

"Ah woo woo~"

mworado nareul nareul guhaejwo

nareul guhaejwo

This song was such a bop as she swayed around to the song, focused.

gyesokdwae domangchyeobwado

geojit soge ppajyeoisseo

Caught in a lie!

"I'm drowning, I'm losing myself. I can't disobey, I can't break away..." she sang emotionally under his vocals.

nae useumeul dollyeonwajwo

Caught in a lie!

"This torment gets worse every day."

i gotongeseo heeonal su eobseo

beolbanneun nareul guhaejwo

After recording everything multiple times, she went on to edit and made sure her vocals fit nicely under his. Things were coming together as that bright smile appeared on her face. She was so satisfied with this. She hoped he and the producers like it when they did their final touches.

Her phone buzzed and she sat back in her seat to read a text from Jimin.

Jimin: Ennie, I know you're awake! Don't stress over it too much. Get some sleep, okay? We can work on the song tomorrow.

Jen: Facetime me. I just sent you what I created :D

It didn't take long for them to be on Facetime together as Jimin was thrilled to see her face.

"Ennie! What time is it over there?"

"Late but it's okay," she said and yawned.

"You should really go to bed. You look so sleepy," he looked concerned for her when he noticed her tired eyes.

"I know, I know. I will."

"I miss you," he pouted.

"And I miss you, too. Don't worry, I'll be back in Korea before you know it,"

"Well, I hope it's soon! It's not the same without you here," the 95 Liner shook his head. "The guys...I...we're kind of all over the place without our Bangtan Girl to keep us in order. We're a bit of a mess. It's weird without you. We just want you to come home,"

His words made her heart leap as she felt emotional, yet again. But then the word 'home' struck her. She was already 'home' in America. But the fact that he said 'home' as in living with them in Korea made tears appear in her eyes.

"Jimin..." she smiled sadly. "It won't be much longer, I hope. Being away from you and everyone else in Korea is a struggle. As soon as I come back, I will nap this jetlag off and we can all go out to eat,"

"I would like that very much, Ennie. So, you wanted me to call you?"

"Yes. Check the email. I sent my work for your song. I hope it sounds okay."

"Wait, you finished it?! All of it? Your background vocals and all?"

"Yeah! I just gotta finish up Stigma and the others,"

"You worked on it so quickly."

"Well, you are a priority," she smiled softly, earning an adorable eye smile from him.

Him a priority? That made his heart leap.

"I played around with it and I like how it sounds. Play it. If you like it, I will send it to the producers to see if they give it the OK. And if you want me to change something, let me know."

Opening up the file, Jimin played it for both of them. The look in his eyes when he heard her guitar was priceless.

"Oh-my-God," he blurted out in English, causing her to laugh. "They have to accept this! This is-this is so good! Thank you for doing this for me. I hope this version makes it on the album after they do their final touches. And if they reject it, let us release it on SoundCloud. Army should hear this,"

"Sounds like a plan,"

After shutting down her computer and ending her call, Jen sat on her bed and tuned in to Jin's Eat Jin V-Live on her laptop. There he was with Jungkook and Jimin rambling about various things. And they had her cracking up with their bickering when they playfully fought over snacks.

But once fans brought up Jennie in the comments, her heart ached as she realized how much she missed the guys. Especially Jungkook. She missed his hugs. How he would hold her firmly and gaze down at her with that adorable smile of his. This visa needed to hurry up and go through. She wanted to wrap her arms around her man again.

"How is Jennie?" Jin read the comment. "My sweetie is doing fine. She has been working very hard. Please look forward to her return. Jennie, you are missed dearly,"

She let out a chuckle, "I miss you, too..."

"I miss your baking, too," he added, making her laugh at the screen. "Bake for me when you come back. Just don't tell the others,"

"We're sitting right here, Hyung!" Jimin called out. "Bake for me, not him!"

"Hush!" Jin playfully smacked him while Jungkook laughed. Turning back to the camera like he knew she was watching, he continued. "The dorm doesn't smell that great without your bath and body works items. You know, the ones you always buy for us. Please return soon and get the visa straightened out. I look at your picture in my wallet every day," he showed Armies the photo of him and her back in 2015.

"He still has that picture?" Jen murmured as she smiled.

"Jungkookie misses her the most," Jimin teased, making the Golden Maknae blush and look down shyly.

"Of course, she's my best friend. I bet she misses me more than you two," Jungkook added.

"Lies! I am Jennie's favorite," Jin stated.

Laughing, Jennie went on to text Jungkook.

Jen: Awwww this live is too cute. I miss you guys, more. I'll be back soon. P.S: I miss you the most, Kookie. I love you. Can't wait to hug and kiss you again

Ding!

The sound of bells was heard as Jungkook looked down at his phone. He read her text with a big smile and looked up at the camera like he felt her looking back at him. It made her heart flip and her face warm up with the way he stared at the camera. Meanwhile, Armies were gushing over the loving gaze Jungkook was showing out of nowhere.

'Why tf is he staring so hard like that?! He looks so hot!'

'Omg Jungkook is showing so much boyfriend material right now.'

'That stare! He's making me blush!'

'Jungkook a warning would have been nice!'

"Who was that?" Jin asked.

"Jennie. She's watching the live," Jungkook smiled brightly.

"She texted YOU and not me!?" he complained.

"Hey, that ringtone sounded familiar. Like a bell. Why a bell?" Jimin teased.

"No reason, Hyung. I thought it sounded nice," Jungkook shrugged.

------

The next day, Jennie started to work on her solo song. Bangtan's solos were supposed to go by age. The plan was for her song to be the first but Big Hit switched it and made her song last. The boys had begun filming for their WINGS films while she hadn't yet. A lot of big things will be happening for this comeback. One of them was her hair was finally going to get dyed. She was nervous because everyone had anticipated her having a new hair color since debut and she wanted it to be worth the wait.

With her solo song, she thought the lyrics and instrumentals were fine. But every time she sent it to the producers, they told her something was missing and it frustrated her. How come everyone else's song was fine but her song was getting the most criticism? Her song was different. Experimental even. This wasn't a sound that is usually in BTS. She'd showcase her DJ skills on the launch pad and guitar.

"Do you feel like singing today?" Pdogg asked as she sat on a video call with him and Slow Rabbit.

Jennie furrowed her eyebrows. "Of course I do. Why wouldn't I?"

"Because to me, it seems like you don't feel like singing,"

She sighed sharply, trying to not let her annoyance get to her. "I'm doing the best I can,"

"It's missing something, Jennie. It's almost there but something is missing," Slow Rabbit added.

"Look, this is the best I can do," she exclaimed.

"No, it isn't," he shook his head. "I know you can do better to make this song even more enhanced. Shout it out. Scream it,"

"I'm trying to shout it,"

"Well, you aren't shouting it," Pdogg said. "You need to dig down deep and sing out what you're feeling for this song,"

"Here, take a break from working on your song, today. Work on the guitar for 2! 3! and Lost. Send it when you're finished," Slow Rabbit said.

"Fine," she nodded and ended the call. 

She sighed loudly out of annoyance and ran her hair back with her hands.

"Fuck my life..." she complained.

She didn't want to work on anything at this point, she was so bothered by what they told her. After a moment of getting herself together, she did what she was told, playing the guitar for Lost and 2! 3! 

After she sent it in, she was praised for her efforts and had the rest of the day off from working on music. But her song continued to be on her mind. How much better can she do for this song? What else did they want? What was missing? She did want to sing. She sang as passionately as she could.

"What do you want me to do...?" she complained softly.

She went back to the document for her song and stripped all her vocals to start over. She listened to the instrumental of her song and sighed, understanding what she had to do.

'You want me to go back to that dark place...' she thought.

She didn't want to. She didn't want to think about it. She even had second thoughts about picking this song for this album but it was way too late to change now. This song was to express how she felt the day she got mobbed during her sister's play. Sure, it happened last year but that anxiety she felt and the whole experience still traumatized her. All those hate comments, the pressure, the high expectations, and the growing fame, began to overwhelm her as she realized that she was not a normal teenager anymore.

She'd always appear to have a smile on her face but deep down she was scared and in the back of her mind would always wonder when this would all come crashing down. 

That dreaded day of Vienna's play made Jen want to stop performing entirely and just go back home and deal with school, no longer being in the spotlight. To try to grasp what normality she had left. But after the support from everyone after that incident, she wanted to try to face all that negativity and destroy it with positive thoughts once and for all. This would be a start to that. To sing about it and twist it to optimism.

As she sat by her desk, she put her headphones on.

"Okay...let's go back to that nightmare..."

---------

After crying, belting out high notes, and singing out her pain, she made the producers happy with her new and improved vocals and took a break from singing to dance.

Jen continued practicing the choreography for Blood, Sweat, and Tears, which will be BTS' comeback song in October. She was in the living room, performing a demo version of the song while Vienna and Alani were on their phones chilling nearby. Mr. Son and J-Hope sent her videos of where she will be and her choreography for the comeback.

It was...very sexy. This seemed like it was going to be a sexy comeback.

As she worked on perfecting her movements, she sent them recordings of her craft to get feedback.

After dancing for a few hours, she took a break and watched Family Guy with her sisters on the couch.

Buzz Buzz Buzz

A video from Jimin? What was he up to now? Since she left, the boys had sent her funny videos and photos. This was probably one of them.

"Ooo another video? Let's watch it! They crack me up!" Alani said.

"Yeah, why not?" Jennie pressed play while her sisters joined her in to watch.

The video showed Jimin, V, and Jungkook goofing around and practicing BST in the practice room.

"Jungkook! Imagine the floor is Jennie!" Jimin called out.

Out of nowhere, Jungkook did his signature handstand for the song, slowly lowering himself on the floor to grind against it.

"Jennie..." he said in a low voice, smirking at the camera.

"AHHHHHHH~!" her sisters screamed around her while Jen dropped her phone and shrieked.

"He did NOT just do that!" Alani shouted.

"And said your name like that! Are you two-"

"No!" Jen exclaimed, cutting Vienna off with her face flushed.

"You sure!?"

"Yes!"

"I dunno man, that sounded like that's not the first time he said your name like that~!" Alani added.

"Oh my God! Stop!" Jennie covered her face.

Vienna grabbed the phone and replayed it so they could watch the entire video. Her sisters continued to freak out around her from his floor grind.

Jennie was NOT expecting a video like this. She thought it would be meme faces. Not him grinding against the floor.

'Wow, I wish I was under him...' she thought before shaking the dirty thoughts away.

My gosh, what was he doing to her? Everything he was doing made her squirm.

After he finished grinding on the floor, Jin was heard yelling to stay professional while Jimin and V laughed.

Her sisters kept replaying the video, expressing how surprised they were.

"Is this really your boyfriend? Because whew, the duality...girl..." Vienna fanned herself.

"I'm a little nervous about how he can turn into such a cute boy to something like this," Alani added.

"Right? He is so adorable and then he ends up popping out like this. No wonder so many girls swoon over him. Jen, watch out for all them female idols after your man," she teased.

"You know, you were staring kind of hard at the screen," Alani called Jennie out.

"I was not!" Jennie exclaimed as she grabbed her phone.

"She's so flustered," Vienna laughed with Alani.

Alani snatched the phone from her hands and ran to their mom who walked out of the kitchen to see what the ruckus was about.

"Mom! Get a load of this!" Alani laughed.

"Stop it! Give it! Mom, it's not what it looks like! Get off me, V!" Jen shouted as Vienna held her down while Alani showed the video.

"Um...what is he doing to my youngest?" their mom asked, wondering what the heck was happening.

"Nothing! Nothing at all! He was just messing around!" Jen said and got let go.

"You think he was? He looked pretty serious," Vienna teased.

He was just joking...right?

Or perhaps he wasn't. Because her head began to go crazy with the way he said her name so low like that. It'll be something that wouldn't be out of her mind for a while as she plotted a way to get him back for making her so flustered in front of her family.

---------

With Jimin and V, they waited for her to reply. Curious as to why she had not responded yet, they looked back at the message and saw that she had read it. The two burst out into laughter.

"Jungkook, I think you killed your girlfriend," Jimin giggled.

"I did?" he asked, surprised. "What happened?"

"She hasn't responded to the video and left us on read this entire time," V laughed.

"I-I didn't make her uncomfortable, did I?" Jungkook asked with worry.

"Nah, don't worry, it's the other way around, Jungkookie! Hehe, you'll see. Just give her a moment to pull herself together. I'm sure she's quite flustered as we speak because of you," Jimin smiled confidently.

-------

Back with Jennie, she continued to pull herself together. This man may just be the death of her. She then thought about the time she and Jungkook performed the coming of age ceremony in the practice room and recorded themselves. Man, those lyrics...

Jen: Jimin wtf!?

Jen: Wtf is he grinding on the floor so hard for!?

Jimin: kekekeke it took you a while to reply. You liked it, didn't you!?

Yes. Yes, she did.

Very much actually. To the point, she wanted to be the floor.

Jen: Okay yes but he needs to calm tf down! He can't be doing stuff like that when I'm not there! I'm suffering here!

Jen: omfg wait don't tell him I said that!

Jimin: Tell Jungkook. Okay. Got it

Jen: Jimin! NO!

"She liked it," Jimin laughed and showed Jungkook the messages.

Jungkook laughed, feeling his cheeks warm up. A large part of him felt relieved that she liked it. 

Maybe they could make it a reality soon.

---------

As the days went by she continued to finish up working on the choreography, and went to Facetime with Jimin. Things were beginning to appear...off about him. And the sad part about it was that she knew.

She knew all too well what was going on.

She didn't want to believe it. She thought that her mind was playing tricks on her but his face was slimming down at a rapid rate and it began to worry her.

"Jimin?" she called out his name softly after he stopped laughing at his story about pranking Hobi.

"Yes, Ennie?"

"Did you eat today?"

Jimin's stomach dropped at her question. Of all days she had to be so observant. He would only eat once a day and tried not to eat a lot to lose as much weight as possible for their next comeback. It was an intense choice and he had already been feeling the side effects such as dizziness and fainting as he tried to work hard on his dancing.

"Yeah, why?" he lied, feeling his heart ache.

He hated lying to her. He knew she would do anything to get him to stop if she had known what he was doing in Korea.

Jennie narrowed her eyes slightly, watching his body language.

'You're lying to me...' she thought sadly.

"I dunno, to me you just look a little smaller in the face," she admitted.

"I'm eating, don't you worry, Ennie," he flashed her an eye smile

"I really hope you are..." she murmured. "Just take care of yourself, please. Promise me that?"

"...I promise."

"Okay...I have to go. I'll talk to you later,"

"A-all right. Bye Ennie,"

"Bye, Chim Chim," she ended the call and exhaled.

"I truly hope you're okay..." she murmured, fearing for the worst.

After her conversation with him, she scrolled on Twitter to check out what Armies had been saying about her while she was away. She was pleased to see how much she was missed.

'I'm so upset Jennie isn't in the ISAC this time because of her visa.'

That made her realize that today was the day everyone would be filming for ISAC. She was bummed she couldn't play volleyball this year. Instead, she would be cheering Bangtan on miles away whenever they sent her videos and photos.

'Whatever team she was supposed to be in volleyball would have won'

'ISAC probably made sure to schedule it when she couldn't attend since they know the other girl idols can't beat her in volleyball. Their loss'

'ISAC knows damn well Jennie will beat every single female idol in volleyball. They just don't want her to shine. They did that for The Boss Is Watching. We didn't forget!'

Snickering at the comment and agreeing, Jennie went on and liked it on BTS' Twitter which quickly got a reaction from fans.

'OMG I KNOW SHE WAS THE ONE THAT LIKED IT!'

'She liked!!'

'Who else would like it from their page? Jennie knows what's up!'

'Ooooo she's watching us'

'Lmaooooo she knows!'

'She soooo petty. The shade!'

'This confirms it!'

-----------

With Jungkook, after filming for the show, he went to visit Namjoon in his studio. He had a lot on his mind regarding his relationship with Jennie. And he felt like Namjoon was the best person to talk to.

"Hyung," Jungkook spoke up.

"Jungkook," he greeted with a smile and gestured for him to come in. "What brings you here?"

"I uh...can I talk to you? I figured you were the best one to talk to about something like this,"

"Yeah, of course. Shut the door and take a seat,"

As soon as Jungkook plopped down on the seat next to him, he sighed. "It's about Jennie,"

"Is everything all right between you two? I know you've been feeling down because of the distance,"

"I'm fine. And yeah, things are great. It's just that...well she...she's just...on my mind a lot lately and I can't stop thinking about her in that way."

Namjoon immediately knew what he meant and nodded. 

So, it was about that time, huh? 

He had a feeling this was going to be happening sooner or later with how touchy he's been with her, lately. And with that floor grinding video, it didn't just look like a simple video to mess with her.

"I had a feeling this was going to happen sooner or later. Have you told her any of this?"

"No, I...I want to but part of me chickens out,"

"You two talk about everything. Why do you think this conversation will be different?"

"I just don't want to turn her off or scare her away, I guess. Or make things awkward if she's not ready like I am,"

"Communication is key and Nini is extremely understanding. You're overthinking it. She loves you and is not going to be scared away that easily. When you feel ready, speak to her about this. And make sure you two are alone for this conversation. Not when the boys are around and acting loud,"

--------

After spinning around in her seat, Jennie played what she had worked on for Taehyung's solo song, Stigma. She helped with the background vocals with jazzy oohs and ahs. She smiled at how his voice sounded. His high note was astonishing to hear and she couldn't wait to hear it live when they go on tour.

For Suga's solo, First Love, she played the guitar for it and noticed the hidden melody of So Far Away which had gotten her emotional.

"Take a break!" a loud voice startled her. Jennie turned her head to see Alani by her door, arms crossed. "You've been on that thing all day. A break won't hurt. The album ain't going nowhere. And you finished everything so just chill for once,"

"Nooooo, I feel like there is still work to be done," Jen complained.

Alani simply rolled her eyes and left.

"Well, that was easy to get her to leave me alone," she murmured.

While she continued working, she suddenly heard music blasting which happened to be Rihanna's Pon De Replay. Before she knew it, Vienna and Alani came in with a large speaker, dancing.

Come, Mr. DJ, song pon de replay

Come, Mr. DJ, won't you turn the music up?

"Oh my God..." Jennie covered her face with her hands, laughing softly. "Really?"

"Come on~! Living room, let's go!" Alani said over the music, holding the speaker.

"Rihanna dance party! Take a break! No more album work, today!" Vienna grabbed Jennie and dragged her downstairs with them.

After Alani set the speaker on the floor, she continued to dance around Jennie with Vienna.

"No more thinking about work today. Loosen up and dance with us. It's Rihanna! Come on~!" Alani exclaimed, earning a sigh from her youngest sister. "If you ready to move say,'"

"Yeah, yeah!" Jen sang with a smile.

"One time for your mind say it,"

"Yeah, yeah!" her smile got wider and she joined in to dance with them. "Well, I'm ready for ya, come let me show ya. You want to groove, I'ma show you how to move. Come, come,"

"There you go~!" Vienna cheered.

It was good to take a break and Jen was thankful for her sisters. She did feel overwhelmed with this album dropping in October. There were high expectations and she wanted to make sure she did everything she could to make the songs great with the small role she was given.

Where Have You Been came on as Vienna tried to remember the choreography.

Where have you been?

'Cause I never see you out

Are you hiding from me, yeah?

Somewhere in the crowd

"I learned it in a dance class a while back. Hold on," Vienna began to think as she stood in the middle of her sisters.

Once the beat dropped, she executed the dance break with no errors while her sisters followed her.

"Oh~! I remember! From the music video!" Alani added.

"When Rihanna and the dancers did that pose that looked like an eye? Top tier!" Jen praised.

"Yeah, that was the coolest thing," Vienna beamed.

As songs like What's My Name, Hard, and Umbrella came on, the trio sang their hearts out while bouncing around the living room and on the couch. Once Breakin' Dishes blasted on the speaker, they became excited since it was one of their favorite Rihanna songs.

"I was waiting for this one!" Vienna yelled happily.

"Are we singing it like we usually do?" Jennie asked with anticipation.

"Let's switch it up!" Alani suggested.

"All right, I'll go," Vienna offered.

He been gone since 3:30

"3:30!" Jen shouted.

Been coming home lately at 3:30

"3:30!"

As the chorus came on, the trio danced around, pretending to be angry while shouting out the lyrics.

I'm breakin' dishes up in here, all night

I ain't gon' stop until I see police lights

"I'm still waiting, come through the door. I'm killing time, you know, bleaching your clothes!" Jennie sang the second verse like she was tired of a man's BS. "I'm roasting marshmallows on the fire. And what I'm burning is your attire. I'm getting restless,"

"Uh!" Alani shouted.

"I'm getting tested!"

"Let him know!"

"And I can't believe he's always out every night and never checks in!"

"He cheating?"

"Is he cheating? Man, I don't know. I'm looking 'round for something else to throw!" Jennie grabbed a pillow and threw it.

After spending the next hour partying to Rihanna's songs, Jennie went to plug in her music and pressed shuffle. Fall Out Boy's Irresistible came on which made her smile.

"Hey, didn't you make a cover of this song recently?" Vienna asked.

"Uh huh!" she beamed, thinking about the series of covers she had done and posted on BTS' SoundCloud for ARMY.

"Did Fall Out Boy notice you, yet?"

"Yeah! I met them! They're so cool! I hope we can collaborate, soon!"

---------

With Matt Rife, he continued to search on social media about Jennie, getting to understand who she was and what she did. He even checked out some fan accounts about her and thought she was even cuter than he anticipated. What surprised him the most was that she was taking self-defense classes. Her teacher had posted a recent video of her throwing him over her hip for a quick takedown after grappling him. Matt was astonished by how strong she was.

What a beauty.

He scrolled through the comments as fans geeked out that she was doing fine in America and raved about how strong she was.

'Omg she really did that!'

'I feel bad for the members if they try to mess with her now, lol'

'RIP Jin! She's preparing for their wrestling match!'

'Can she throw me like that on the ground?'

'If she throws me like that, I would say thank you'

'She can punch me in the face anytime!'

'MOM!'

'Wow, she's so strong'

'I love that she's taking self-defense classes. I want to take them now.'

Soon after, he couldn't help himself and wrote a comment too.

'@JJennie_JW you can throw me like that anytime ;)'

And of course, he was told by Armies to back off.

---------

For a while, ARMY began to notice a shift in Jungkook's demeanor. He did not seem as happy as he usually was and his jokes weren't common like they used to be. Sure he'd smile and laugh whenever he was with the members but the truth was that this distance between him and Jennie was difficult to adjust to. It did make him ponder about this being a preview for when he goes off to the military.

Twitter noticed his attitude change and made threads about him being unhappy. Along with that, people were asking about Jennie and her future with BTS because it seemed like she wasn't doing anything or being involved anymore.

'Okay WHERE is Jennie? Thread'

'Guys Jennie has not been active with BTS in a while. She has not been with them for their recent concerts or V-Lives and I am worried something bad happened'

The thread went on to come up with various theories on the matter while armies were quick to put in their two cents.

'I hope she isn't leaving BTS.'

'Yeah, where tf is she? And she hasn't posted anything in a while! That's unusual! BTS stay posting but there is nothing about her these days'

'They talk about her on vlive so that's a good sign things are fine, right?'

'You think she fought with a member or something?'

'Come to think of it, maybe that's why Jungkook has been looking off these days. They may have fought and aren't on speaking terms'

'Like you see the body language of Jungkook lately? They had a bad argument and aren't friends anymore'

'What? What kind of mess is that? That's a dumb theory'

'You guys are dumb. It's her VISA'

'A visa doesn't take that long to go through. She should be back by now'

'Come to think of it, yeah, you may be right. I'm sure things are finished by now and she could come back to Korea'

'I think her visa is taking longer than usual and that's why. Relax,'

'Maybe Big Hit is just letting her spend more time with her family like the perfect company they are!'

'Nah, Big Hit is sabotaging her. She should be back with Bangtan'

'No, they're probably letting her spend more time in America before coming back. They're a great company and allowing her to spend time with her family. Calm down'

'No, they're not a great company! They are ruining her! She needs to get out of there. I hate seeing her inactive'

'All y'all need to just trust that things with Jennie are going to be fine. Stop making everyone anxious about this. Jennie is still with BTS'

Since Jennie still couldn't go back to Korea yet, the staff decided to fly to America to film her Wings 8 video. They rented a big space to make sure they had all they needed for the short film. The company decided to have her video and song be the last ones out of the group. The solo videos were going to begin getting released around September 4th and her video was scheduled for September 19th before they changed plans and made her show up last.

Despite working on the album, Big Hit still wanted her to remain off social media. It had been hard since she wanted to engage with fans and shout out other idol groups for their comebacks like Monsta X and Got7 but she did what she was told.

'Short Film Making Story'

'#Evermore'

With the camera filming her getting ready, she happily waved to it and began to speak.

"Hey, it's your girl Jennie and today I am here to film my Wings short film! And look! My hair is finally dyed! Frickin red! Ahhh~!" she cutely jumped up and down and showed it off before letting the stylist continue their work. "Now y'all can stop asking me every single comeback! I mean look at this! Look! This hair is amazing! I look so good! I'm glad I went through with it. Red looks great on me! Rihanna vibes!"

"She cried," the stylist put her on blast.

'Miss Bangtan Is Put On Blast'

Jennie stared at the stylist, astounded. "I-I didn't cry!"

"Yes, you did. You were like, 'Oh God please let my hair be okay. Please don't let it fall out or get damaged,'" the stylist teased.

"Shut it!"

Jen went over to the set that looked similar to an airport as she wore jeans and a black and white hoodie with a messy bun.

"I have no idea what the guys are doing for their short films," she added. "But since I'm here in America, the staff came here so we can film. Even though I'm having some visa issues, that doesn't mean I'm stopping my bag. We're making this work. I want you to see a different side of me for this comeback. I hope you look forward to it and keep cheering me on,"

She was given a bag to carry as the stylists did the finishing touches to her hair and makeup. 

"I'm supposed to be playing three people today," she announced to the camera with a nervous expression. "My regular self as you see now and then my dark and good personas. Kind of like an angel and a devil on your shoulders. It's going to be cool how the video is going to be created."

"Action!" the director announced.

Jen went on with the role, walking through the airport, clutching her bag. She looked around frantically before rushing into the women's bathroom. 

After recording her walking a couple of times to get all the right angles, she was then filmed in front of a bathroom sink. She placed her palms on it with a troubled facial expression as she stared at herself in the mirror. Before she knew it, she backed away, startled, and began to look confused.

For the scene with her back in the home she was in for the I Need U MV, she did a costume change, wearing a black suit with a black lace bodysuit under it. This time she was playing her evil persona with her hair down.

"I lowkey always wanted to play an evil person. I wonder how long it'll take for me to get into character. My sister helped me practice for the role. I hope she likes my acting and doesn't roast me for it. My acting lessons will pay off too!" she laughed. "I'm supposed to be speaking to myself. It'll be weird speaking to air but in the video, it'll have all three of me in the shot. So, you'll see how it all develops,"

Once she heard action, Jennie leaned her back against the counter and glanced over nonchalantly at her dead ex who was on the floor.

"Welp..." she murmured coldly and turned to where her other self would be leaning over the counter. "Hey. Pull yourself together."

'Jennie channels her inner evil self with charisma'

"Come on, let me take over. I'm tired of this 50/50 fight," she said smugly like she was looking at the good persona of herself.

For the last shot, Jennie sat in the waiting room of the airport, playing some notes from her solo song on the guitar. While she played, someone walked over to her which caused her to stop and acknowledge the person. The camera remained on her, only showing the person's footsteps to keep viewers guessing who had found her.

Once the director announced that the shot was finished, everyone cheered while Jennie happily jumped out of her seat and bowed politely.

"Thank you! Woo! I'm done~! Yay! I can't wait for the video to drop! Look forward to it ARMY!" she waved goodbye to the camera.

-----

Wings 8: Evermore

"I wanted only to live in accord with the promptings which came from my true self. Why was that so very difficult?" Jennie narrated from Demain before the screen faded in to reveal her feet running through the airport.

It panned up to her back as footsteps and her heavy breathing were heard. She had been running and slowed down the pace to speed walk. There was hardly anyone in the airport as she looked around, clutching her bag tightly with her guitar on her back. She appeared troubled as several thoughts went through her mind like she did something regretful and thought someone was going to find her.

All that was on her mind was that she had to leave. Asap. She could not stay here. Not after what happened.

Finding the women's bathroom, she rushed into it and set her bag and guitar down against the wall. Jen exhaled sharply, and approached a sink, placing her palms on it. Slowly, she looked up to meet her reflection in the mirror.

"You're okay..." she whispered to herself.

She looked fine but on the inside, she felt like hell. Upon looking at herself, she was startled when a woman that looked exactly like her, stared at her from behind. Only not in a bun but with her hair down and black clothing.

This dark figure she stared at smirked softly, which caused Jennie to look confused.

What was going on? Why was she staring at herself wearing different clothes and hair? The dark figure even had the same white butterfly necklace in contrast with the dark clothes.

Jen tilted her head to the side and watched as the figure copied her movements. She then tilted her head to the other side and watched as the figure did the same. Swiftly turning around, she was met with nothing. The woman was gone.

She took a few steps forward. Okay, maybe she was imagining things.

But little did she know, the dark figure was behind her. When Jennie turned around, her face was cupped into the dark figure's hands, and her forehead pressed against hers, ending the shot as the screen went black.

For the next shot, Jennie was back at home where she was in for the I Need U MV. She had on the same white dress from the MV with the messy bun still intact.

She stood against the kitchen counter with her forearms on it. Her face remained emotionless as she thought about what had just happened.

The camera panned over to the feet on the floor that belonged to her ex. To ease her nerves, she tapped her shaky fingers against the glass of water she had in her hands. Her mind began to fog up with negative thoughts about her fate.

Abruptly, the dark persona of hers leaned her back against the counter, crossing her arms. She glanced at the body nonchalantly.

"Welp..." her dark persona spoke coldly. She had no remorse for the man. She turned to Jennie and watched as she was still in a state of shock. "Hey. Pull yourself together..."

A loud sigh was heard as Jennie's good persona stood on the other side, facing the counter. She wore a white suit and her red hair was straightened. A black butterfly necklace was placed around her neck as she stared at the body sympathetically. She placed a hand on Jennie's shoulder.

"Are you all right?" her good persona asked.

"Of course, she is. He got what he deserved," her dark persona answered, earning a frown in return.

"It was an accident,"

"An accident? Please...if he's dead, he deserved it," her dark persona bluntly replied.

"She is not a bad person," her good persona denied and removed her hand from Jennie.

"That's where you're wrong. There's a bit of evil in all of us and you know it," her dark persona turned to Jennie who continued to look forward. A wicked smile crept on her lips. "I bet that felt good...tempting..."

"It was a scary situation she was put in. It didn't feel good at all. She's full of remorse,"

"To you. She's more like me now and soon she will become all of me,"

"She will never become what you are. Not while I'm here,"

"Look around you," the dark persona gestured, briefly looking around. "Look at what happened. This is her true self,"

"This is not her,"

"Yes, it is. She won't be needing you, anymore. Come on, let me take over, I'm tired of this 50/50 fight,"

"She'll atone. I'm not giving up on her," 

"Well, it certainly wasn't you that she channeled to do what she did. You're too soft. Enough was enough."

The good persona ignored her and leaned toward Jennie's ear. "You are still a good person. You defended yourself. It was self defense."

Having enough, the dark persona grabbed Jen by the chin and turned her head slightly, speaking in her ear as she glared at his body. "Look at what you've done. Look at him suffer! He deserved every bit of it! This was what you wanted to do for a very long time. This was building for weeks!" she began to shout angrily. "These men think they can do whatever they want to us, say whatever they want, disrespect us, and hurt us?! No. They did it to the wrong one this time,"

Jennie seemed to have slowly gotten out of her shocked state when she heard a loud groan from the floor.

So he was still alive...

That calmed her nerves a bit as Jennie managed to walk across the counter to stand and look at his weakened state. He faintly called out her name in anger, uttering out curses.

"Huh. So, the piece of shit is still alive," her dark persona said with a scowl as she stood next to Jennie with her arms crossed.

"Good. There's still time," her good persona said, standing on her other side.

"No..." her dark persona turned to Jennie. "You know exactly what to do...end it,"

"No. Don't throw it all away. You're better than this. You are not alone and you know which route to take," her good persona said as the trio looked at the man on the floor.

Back to reality, Jennie had awakened in the waiting area of her flight thanks to her phone notifications going off. She also noticed that it was getting close to her flight arrival and more people were showing up at the airport.

Curious about the messages, she went through them and noticed it was all about whether she was all right which made her tear up. Everyone was asking for her whereabouts. But she had to ignore it and keep moving forward. She needed to leave.

Before she could turn her phone off, the person she wanted to avoid the most began to call. She hesitated to answer as she stared at the caller ID while the camera didn't show who was calling. 

Placing her phone back into her bag, she grabbed her guitar out of the case and began to play the opening notes of her song to distract herself.

The camera panned to the floor to show footsteps approaching her and they stopped near the row she sat at. As Jen stopped playing, the instrumental of her song continued to play in the background.

Feeling a hand on her shoulder, she let out a breath and acknowledged the hand. She then slowly turned her head to look up in the direction of the individual she predicted to find her as the screen faded to black.

"Looks like you found me..."

[goodlucktai]

thank you for pulling me through

one piece pairing: brook & luffy word count: 2k title borrowed from precious love by james morrison smile again au

read on ao3

x

[The livestream begins without any introduction, the camera stationed to that side so that the baby grand piano and the bench are both in profile. The Soul King himself is sitting in front of the keys, playing scales idly and humming to himself. He seems to be waiting for something.]

skuuuullj0ke  Anyone know what this is?

gremlin energy✨✨ @ skuuuullj0ke check his pinned

existential dread but make it cute  @ skuuuullj0ke probably an apology

A handful of angry bees @ existential dread but make it cute Apology for what?? 

A handful of angry bees There was a loss in his family

A handful of angry bees Get some perspective maybe??

existential dread but make it cute  @ A handful of angry bees i paid like 200 dollars for my ticket and he canceled a week before the show

👻SOUL PARADE👻 @ existential dread but make it cute Literally his brother died whats wrong with you?

👻SOUL PARADE👻 @ existential dread but make it cute Also his team worked with all the event organizers to get everyone refunded asap so idk why youd choose to cry about money you already got back.

5924874392607 imagine spending 200 usd on soul king tix lmao 

gremlin energy✨✨ @ 5924874392607 i think you’re in the wrong place actually

skuuuullj0ke  Yikes

[A door somewhere out-of-frame opens with a mighty slam, and someone lets out an ‘oof’ as it presumably bounces back off the wall and knocks the wind out of them. Brook turns around on the bench to face the newcomer, an animated smile on his face. “So glad you could join us!” “Sorry, sorry,” a younger voice replies brightly. “Zoro went the wrong way and we ended up at a Mexican diner somehow. The food smelled amazing so we had to get some. And then Barto was there because I think he’s still tracking my phone? But he paid for lunch so that was cool. And I brought you some steak tacos!”  “In that case, all is forgiven!” A teenage boy in a worn straw hat finally scrambles into view. He launches himself at Brook for a full-bodied hug that almost knocks them both onto the floor. Brook catches him easily and hugs him back with equal enthusiasm.]

clankclunk imagine being this extroverted 😭😭

Jen.  I dont know who this child is but I’d die for him

⋆｡°✩lullabyparry⋆｡°✩ OH MY GOD ITS LUFFY!!!!!!!!

gremlin energy✨✨ He looks like hes doing a lot better !

A handful of angry bees Aww we haven't seen Luffy on here in ages 👒💛

Water 7 🔛🔝 Is anyone else worried about the dude apparently stalking his phone?????

clankclunk @ Water 7 🔛🔝 no that’s just bart. he’s weird but harmless.

existential dread but make it cute  @ Water 7 🔛🔝 lbr wed all stalk brooks contacts if we could 💞

skuuuullj0ke  We really really wouldn’t though

stream “1000 sunny days” album now 🔪 @ existential dread but make it cute hey mods come get this weirdo

👻SOUL PARADE👻 @ stream “1000 sunny days” album now 🔪 I wouldnt worry. His sister is the mod today and she wields the block hammer with an iron fist  

⋆｡°✩lullabyparry⋆｡°✩ @ 👻SOUL PARADE👻 lmao our queen is in the room 👑🙇

[“Come sit, Luffy,” Brook says cheerfully. “Ah, but first, throw your bag as hard as you can that way so the food smell doesn’t distract me this entire time,” he adds, pointing off to the left. Gamely, the boy gathers his tote bag together in his hands and flings it with what appears to be all the strength he can muster. It clatters noisily against something off-camera and there’s a deafening bang.  “Perfect!” Brook declares.  “Ah, wait, I forgot that was Sanji’s stuff,” Luffy says.  “He’ll get over it,” an unnamed person replies off-camera.]

Jen. RIP whoever sanji is 🙏

skuuuullj0ke  So much chaotic energy, so little time

clankclunk Luffy’s been here for 1 minute and already something is broken. New record??

[Moderator] Nami 🌊☀️ @ clankclunk Not even close. 

newname92 Woah when he threw the bag and his shirt fell open for a sec

newname92 Did anyone else see that crazy scar????????

A handful of angry bees @ newname92 You know what, I'm not even going to bother explaining why that was an insensitive question, because I’m not actually your kindergarten teacher 

[“My manager as well as the rest of my team have been very forthcoming about my recent absence,” Brook says, seeming to address the thousands of people watching the stream for the first time. “I know that the cancellation of my Sunny Days tour was a disappointment to many of you, and I’m very sorry for that. You know by now how important it is to me to be able to share my music with you all. But I do not regret it, because as much as I love the stage, my heart lives at home, and home is where I was needed.” Luffy leans against him, his head barely making it to Brook’s shoulder. He lays his own fingers on the keys and starts up a stumbling rendition of Binks’ Brew. The musician’s more practiced hands guide him along patiently.  “While there was plenty of anger to be heard from a number of you,” Brook goes on, “mostly your voices poured out to my family in sympathy and support. Your kindness means more to me than I can explain, so I’ll simply say thank you, thank you, thank you.”  “Thank you!” Luffy adds. “I always said Brook’s fans were the best.” “That you did,” Brook confirms cheerfully.]

stream “1000 sunny days” album now 🔪 Not me literally tearing up in the break room rn

👻SOUL PARADE👻 Oh OK cool I’ll just sob horrifically into my pad thai then thanks so much Soul King

clankclunk HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE NORMAL WHEN THEY EXIST

⋆｡°✩lullabyparry⋆｡°✩ 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Water 7 🔛🔝 Ive only been a soul king stan for like 2 days but already i would give my life for this family

stream “1000 sunny days” album now 🔪 @ Water 7 🔛🔝 welcome to the crew 🏴☠️

[“So the reason for this livestream is not to apologize,” Brook says. “But rather something more personal. Today marks the very start of a brand new year, and also the birthday of one Ace D. Portgas—the first birthday we find ourselves celebrating without him.” “Ace can’t be here anymore, but he loved a good party,” Luffy pipes up. He’s still smiling, but some of the energy is gone from him now. His hands are in his lap, no longer tripping merrily across the keys. “We’re gonna make sure he hears it from wherever he is. Marco and Thatch and everybody’s gonna be there.” “That’s right! But the party is later. For now, I’d like to play him a song.”  “A birthday song?” Luffy asks.  “His favorite,” Brook confirms.  He begins to play without further ado, accompanying himself as he sings a slow, acoustic version of James Morrison’s “Precious Love.” Luffy watches him with wide, lamplike eyes, expressive face strangely unreadable. Brook’s voice swells and fills the room.    [CAPTIONS] 🎶 I was so lost, didn't know what to do with myself.  I was my own worst enemy, I was lost and oh, I needed help. Then you came along, and saw what state I was in. You picked me up when I was down, showed me how to live again. 🎶   A young man with hair dyed vivid green comes into frame, but only to sit on Luffy’s free side with his back to the piano. His face can’t be seen, and he doesn’t offer any obvious condolence or comfort; but he sticks his elbow out, and Luffy immediately loops their arms together, and that seems to be more than enough.  There is movement from elsewhere in the room. The light shifts as the door opens again, and shadows move across the wall as the three by the piano are joined by an unknown number of other people. Luffy looks up and whoever he sees makes him smile. Brook continues singing, soulful and slow and golden.    [CAPTIONS]  🎶 I say thank you, for pulling me through, I'm a lucky man. I didn't know what life was, but now I understand. 🎶]

Jen. Okay i did some googling. I dont really follow artists personal lives beyond what they share on their own social media bcus its not really any of my business

Jen. But goddamn this is sad 

skuuuullj0ke  @ Jen. Bro I cried so hard when I found out about the accident i had to leave class

stream “1000 sunny days” album now 🔪 @ Jen. No joke. Some of my friends met ace backstage once during brook’s sabaody tour, the second night of the oakland show, but i never got the chance. Still, his entire familys grief was so raw and horrible, i know in my heart he must have been like a really really wonderful guy

gremlin energy✨✨ Ace is in a lot of the older videos on this channel, those are still up 

gremlin energy✨✨ I’m not saying go be super weird about it but if you watch like 2 of them you’ll understand immediately 

Water 7 🔛🔝 @ gremlin energy✨✨ Ace was brooks brother?

A handful of angry bees @ Water 7 🔛🔝 Not biologically, but yeah. 

gremlin energy✨✨ @ Water 7 🔛🔝 They all sort of adopted each other. Even Ace and Luffy aren’t biologically related but that’s so much a non-issue that i cant remember the last time it ever came up 

⋆｡°✩lullabyparry⋆｡°✩ @ Water 7 🔛🔝 they’re family 

clankclunk I didnt know this was ace’s favorite song. I didnt even know this song existed. Adding it to everything as we speak 

👻SOUL PARADE👻 @ clankclunk This cover might be the most beautiful thing Ive ever heard

skuuuullj0ke  @ 👻SOUL PARADE👻 FR like i want to be respectful but i also want this version released on spotify asap 😭

Skeletons on parade  The way they talk about ace like hes just somewhere else is kind of beautiful 

owl be back 🦉 @ Skeletons on parade they’re throwing him a birthday party 😭😭😭

clankclunk @ owl be back 🦉 love isn’t past-tense

[When the last ringing note from the piano fades, Brook looks down at Luffy and says, “What did you think, boss?” Luffy rubs his face with the heel of his hand, which is the only indication he’s been crying. Arms come around him from all sides, half a dozen faces spilling forward to hold him. The green-haired boy beside him gets squashed into the group hug before he sees it coming and no amount of flailing gets him out of it. Brook laughs above it all and flops over to splay his weight on the top of the pile playfully.  The piano keys give a jarring clang when someone’s elbow lands against them. A knee slipping from where it’s braced on the bench is all it takes for the entire group to go down in a tangle of limbs. A woman with long black hair is the only one aside from Brook who remains upright, effortlessly graceful. It’s her arm around Luffy’s shoulders that keeps him from falling, too.  “I loved it,” Luffy declares, in response to Brook’s unanswered question. “Ace would have loved it, too. Can you play it again?” “Until my arms fall off,” Brook agrees at once, already fanning his hands out over the keys, as if there’s not a bunch of people bickering noisily and wrestling with each other on all sides of him, just out of view of the camera.  Luffy grins and says, “Louder this time!”  The music that starts up is boisterous and triumphant and raucous—less of a bittersweet remembrance, more of a call for everyone to join in at the top of their lungs. And that’s exactly what everyone does. Clambering upright to hold onto each other, their voices ringing off the walls. The words of the song are clearly familiar to every one of them. The act of screaming out the chorus together is even more so. This was their brother’s favorite song, and they sing it like they mean it.   [CAPTIONS]  🎶This is precious love, it’s precious love. No, I can't let it go. This is precious love, and it’s teaching me, everything I need to know. 🎶]

skuuuullj0ke  Raise your hand if your singing along 🙋 

gremlin energy✨✨ @ skuuuullj0ke ✋✋

stream “1000 sunny days” album now 🔪 @ skuuuullj0ke My coworkers hate me but ✋

👻SOUL PARADE👻 @ skuuuullj0ke ✋😭

⋆｡°✩lullabyparry⋆｡°✩ @ skuuuullj0ke 👐👐👐

Skeletons on parade  @ skuuuullj0ke 🙋🙋

clankclunk So now im supposed to go to dinner with my friends and act like im not a fundamentally different person after this????

Water 7 🔛🔝 @ clankclunk 🤝 I SEE YOU BESTIE I KNOW YOUR PAIN 🫂🫂 

Jen. They’re laughing and being silly on his birthday. Idk its just rly nice. Its like proof that the good things can outlast the bad 

A handful of angry bees RIP Ace, I hope you had even half an idea of how loved you are

clankclunk @ A handful of angry bees He must have known

clankclunk @ A handful of angry bees Look at how goofy his family is. Theres no way they loved him quietly

skuuuullj0ke  He knew 🧡

[sparkwithinme]

I really didn't realize how long it's been since I posted... gosh. x_x Apologies for being mia so bad... I have been lurking a bit, but yeah. Uh. Life sure has been happening. lol Have few things I will probably post, but I hope you can all forgive me if I plug a thing first?

SO I'm taking commissions again. This time just sketch ones, as I don't think I have it in me to do full finished work right now. Since keeping things simple, using Ko-Fi for this!

(Trying to raise funds to get a new desktop that isn't 15 years old, so I can continue to play and stream FFXIV (my desktop couldn't even run the benchmark cry XD), but also have lot of software and things I want to do that I haven't been able to... I really need something not so vastly behind. lol)

More examples: (5.4 Spoilers)

(Yes, I know mostly ffxiv, but I'm happy to draw not!XIV things too of course :3b)

[hannahssimblr]

Chapter Five (Part 4)

When we finally get back, Kelly and Claire are still gone. I wonder how long it’s been. It feels like Jen and I were gone forever, and there’s a big part of me driven by habit that wants to go into the house and find them, but I don’t. I know it’s not what Jen would want me to do. 

I sit back down next to Liam and he squeezes my knee reassuringly. “Are you okay?” He whispers, and I nod. “Yeah, I’m fine now.”

“So you’re just finished fifth year?” Joe asks me then. I appreciate that he’s making an effort to be normal and make me feel comfortable after my ordeal. 

“Yes” I say. “Leaving cert next year! So scary.”

“Don’t be scared, sure we all survived it.” The gang laughs apprehensively. “Well, we think we did. We’ll find out when the results come back.”

“I imagine waiting is hard” I say. 

“It’s better not to think about it too much. We all just want to enjoy our last summer here.”

“It’s strange, isn’t it?” says Jen. “All the times we came down here as kids and now… it’s like we don’t know if we’ll ever come back after this year.” Everyone looks a little sad then, and Shane nudges me suddenly and tries to lighten the mood. “Tell everyone what you want to do in college.” He says. 

“Oh. Well, art I think.”

“You make art?” Jude looks at me with interest, and I immediately want to downplay my abilities for fear that he’ll think I’m full of myself. “Yeah, I suppose, I’m okay at it.”

“Everyone says she’s great at it.” Liam tells him. “I haven’t seen her drawings yet, but the girls were raving about her. She draws in her sketchbook every day.”

“That’s cool – what do you draw?” Jude asks me.

“Just whatever I see. Landscapes, people, sometimes still life, like stuff that’s lying around in the mobile home. I really like doing it, because when I’m drawing I don’t have to think about anything else.”

“Oh, mad. Jude is an artist too.” Jen says. “Ye have something in common.” Oh no. I think. He’s going to be able to somehow tell that I’m an imposter. 

“Yeah, I’m studying art in college next year,” He says. “I already have my place in the Berlin Academy of Fine Arts to do a degree.”

“Oh, so you’re studying abroad?”

“Yeah, it’s going to be good. Four years in Germany, I can’t wait. I’m actually leaving at the end of the summer.” I think about how that’s the coolest thing I ever heard. I imagine what it’d be like to live somewhere other than Ireland, surrounded by like minded artists sharing ideas and painting together in beautiful parks. I can picture myself somewhere like that, with my own studio in a big white room overlooking a cultured European city, huge windows wide open with warm light streaming in and  birds singing outside.

Claire finally comes out of the house looking worried. She’s alone, and there’s a line etched between her brows. She crouches down beside me as everyone else continues to talk. “Kelly is really sick.” She says in a low voice. “She drank too much of something and now she’s throwing up everywhere. I think we should bring her home.” I consider this. I don’t feel sympathetic to Kelly at all, because she put herself in this situation, but at the same time I know that it would be terrible for Claire if I let her deal with her on her own. I sigh and start to stand up. “Where is she?”

“She’s in the bathroom. We’ll have to go and get her.” Liam, ever the gentleman, gets up to help too. “I can get my dad to come and collect us.” He says. “We’d just need to get her out onto the road.”

“I think that’d actually be good.” Says Claire. “I really don’t think she’s going to be able to walk all the way home.”

“Is everything okay?” Jen asks us, and when I tell her what’s happened with Kelly she sighs with exasperation. “You don’t have to go, Evie, you can stay here with us if you want to.”

“No, I do.” I say. “I want to go with them.”

She shrugs, and then when I turn to leave she pulls me back suddenly. “Hey, you should come to Dublin with us at the weekend.” 

“Huh?”

“Jude and I are going to an exhibition and you might really like it.”

“I’m forcing her to come.” Jude tells me, leaning over to us. “Jen hates contemporary art but I’m making her come so I don’t have to go on my own.”

She rolls her eyes and pulls a face. “Contemporary art.”

“No pressure at all.” He tells me. “But yeah, if you want to, you’re welcome. We’ll mostly be hanging out in the city for the day anyway so whatever you feel like doing.”

“I’m just saying, it might be nice to get away for an afternoon.” Jen pats my hand. 

“I’d love to.” I say, feeling my chest fill with happiness at the invitation. “Yes, definitely. I’ll come along. What day?”

“Saturday.”

“Okay, see you Saturday.” I turn away and rush inside, smiling from ear to ear as I go to help peel Kelly off the bathroom floor.

Prev // Next

[iwasforcedtomakethisbytum]

Help me ahhh i can't stop thinking about what I'd do if i were in charge of a reboot of 6teen

For starters it would be more serialized, the original already had some of that and i don't wanna it to be so serialized you can't watch episodes out of order but we have streaming now so why not just have more mentions of previous episodes or foreshadowing future episodes

I'm mainly just thinking about Jonesy and how i could to not be the most hateable character, but i still want him to be a bit of a jerk to be honest but dear Lord I'm gonna give him a little chill pill like maybe he shouldn't be a literal criminal in multiple episodes, i wanna keep him being a selfish dick but maybe instead of flirting with literally all the women it's mostly just with his friends i kinda like the idea of him being demisexual idk i just like it, i also gave him more necklaces, mostly they mean nothing and he'd be happy letting another wear them, but one of his necklaces is his cremation necklace and is just really uncomfortable with the idea of others wearing it

i made jude trans, again i don't remember why i hc it but it's fun, so my design for him shows his binder under his tank top, i feel it would be mentioned but not a lot outside of a joke or two, i give him the more girly hands the women are given as a way to hint it and maybe older photos could show him with long hair or a dress. I also gave him a scarf which one thing i did add was maybe he'd like crochet/knitting and made the scarf himself (i also like to think nikki carries an opossum around that Jude made) he rollerstates everywhere even when he bumps into everything! I don't know what to headcanon his family like, they almost seem neglectful in the series as they're usually mentioned leaving jude alone at the house i feel but does that mean they're bad

Jen i feel she'd roughly stay the same, but maybe she'd be complaining a bit more about shit, i imagine she puts up with her job and school and stuff she hates because she knows it'll help her get what she wants but she doesn't care for it in private. Her parents are divorced like the original but i feel her dad isn't really explained in the original because jen remembers him as a good dad and some lines may reference him having died (omg what if he died by suicide, no I'm sorry not today) but it's never said that he's dead explicitly so it would make me wonder why in the original jen only lives with her mom, did he flee the area, was jen an unreliable narrator and he truly did something awful that warranted him not having custody, did her parents both choose to let Jen's mom have full custody for some reason? I don't know but in my version i like the idea of it being mention that she has to move between the houses (wait would she even have too, i know 16 is a bigger deal in Canada so would that give her the right to decide to not live with one of them?) but in my version of the show jens parents would have split costody of her and that would be mentioned

Nikki is a bit more nerdy i feel i made her, i like the idea of Chinese being her home language, and maybe she can also speak other languages outside of English and Chinese, i feel she'd speak Quebec French, Spanish and ASL to varying degrees of proficiency i could see her maybe considering being an interpreter as a career, she'd still be into protesting the same stuff she has before, she now has a half shaven head, one thing i don't necessarily care for with redesigns is just making her really emo but she's not really that in the original i mean sure it's alt but i don't see it as really emo. I feel like her and Wyatt talk about anime a lot. I feel she'd be fairly distant from her friends at the beginning of the series, like she's there with them they've known her most of their lives but it's not like she opens up to them about things and might seem unemphatic to them but overtime she tries to care about them and open up more maybe starting with them saying they're bi, which one is just like "wait you hadn't told us this before?"

Wyatt is also just nerdier, he draws, he sucks at it but he does draw, he obviously in a band, and so is jude, he just gets to do everything wyatt gets really obsessed with things he likes and will be upset if you don't like them, he also wears his headphones almost all the time, usually they're no music on though, i feel the music his band makes is just stuff that stimulates the ears it's just "hehe brain go brrrr" he's really into written art as well like fanfiction and poetry, i feel it would also be mentioned he takes care of younger siblings a lot as it's mentioned he's part of a big family in the series, i see him on the younger end of the family but still, idk maybe he could also have nieces and nephews

Caitlin also is into art, i feel she'd really be into the idea of fashion design but doesn't know how to make/modify clothing, she is the best drawer of the group, you can still very easily tell she's an only child, i liked the headcanon of her being homeschooled before joining the same school as the rest of the group, you could make an argument the first episode could imply it by saying "she didn't start until grade 10" but that also could mean she just went somewhere else, but i do think it would be fun if she didn't stop being friends with trisha despit being a bitch and the others keep trying to tell her to not hang with her but she "sees the good in her" i think it would be interesting to see it play out

I feel their parents would be mentioned more in the series, they might not show up but they are teenagers/young adults living under their parents roof so i feel it would make sense for it to be brought up more, like maybe the mention of a curfew or them complaining about something they're parents are doing or complain about rules they don't understand

It would be kinda cool to have a moment where both jen and jonesy bitch about their home lives and maybe complain that the marriage shouldn't even happen

Well that's it, i could probably say more but my brain has been satisfied

[larakb117]

LONDON ADVENTURE

Joseph Quinn & female y/n

Summary: You pack your things for the New York trip with Joseph while he desperately waits for you in his apartment…

Content Warning: implied smut (18+), making out, fluff, rpf

Part 8

“Are you hungry now?”, he asked. “Yes.”, you still trembled a bit and tried to collect your thoughts.

“I´ll get you something.” You sat up and covered your naked body with the blanket. Joe placed a glass of water on the living room table in front of you. He went back to the open kitchen counter and prepared something for you. “Is garlic bread okay for you? I don´t have a lot of stuff here, because of next week. I made the bread earlier this morning.”, Joe asked with his back turned to you. “Yes, thank you!” Joe came back with a wooden tray and set it right next to the glass you had already emptied. You instantly grabbed some grapes from the plate and shoved them, one after the other, in your mouth. You were so hungry now. The garlic bread tasted amazing.

You both ended up under the blanket, your bodies intertwined, still no clothes on. “What is your biggest secret?”, you gazed at his face. “I don’t know.”, he pushed his lower lip forward and put on a serious face. “Oh, come on!” “I don’t know, don’t know!”, he repeated cheekily: “What´s yours?” “Ehm, probably my huge collection of sex toys.”, you answered quickly. Joe looked at you in surprise: “Really?” You nodded. “But it seems like I don´t need them anymore.”, you smiled widely at Joe. “Babe, who knows! Maybe they get in handy at some point.” The new pet name sent goosebumps down your spine. Joe touched your cheeks, the other hand went around your waist and pulled you on top of his lap. His bulge pressed into your ass cheeks. You started to sensually kiss. He caressed every accessible part of your body. After a few minutes of making out and moaning into each other mouths you both slowly fell asleep. All the sex made you really tired.

You woke up before Joe, you took the opportunity and intensely looked at Joes face. His head laid on top of your cleavage, you could not see his whole profile, but you inspected every facial feature. Joe had some winkles around the eyes and on his forehead, they surely were there because he laughed a lot, not just simply laughing, it was full of joy. You recognized a little scar on his forehead as well and wondered why he might had got that. Joes lips were just perfect, you closed your eyes and it was like they were touching yours. His eyes had a wonderful shade of chocolate brown, his mother was totally right. Even though you just thought about him looking at you, you could feel his gaze which made the butterflies in your stomach flutter wildly. Maybe this was all a dream. This could not be real. Impossible that you went from “no men are interested in you” to “one unbelievable orgasm and compliment and touch and pet name after another” in just three days, you grinned to yourself. Your eyes opened again and you began to gently stroke his curled hair, down his cheek and over his facial hair, which was kind of messy. He had it on cheeks, above the upper lip, on the chin and down his jaw.

Joes eyes slightly opened as well, while you moved your fingers down his face slowly. “Oh, sorry.”, you whispered. “What time is it?”, Joe blinked into the sunlight streaming through the big window. “I don’t know. But I think I need to leave soon.” Joe hugged you tight and dramatically cried: “Please!!Don´t leave me!” You could not resist a chuckle: “I need to pack, remember?” “Oh you´re right.” You got up from the sofa and started to collect all of your clothes which were distributed all over his apartment. Fully dressed the last thing you needed was your phone and your small bag from last night. Joe handed you both of them. Some missed calls from Jen were shown on your lock screen. You would call her as soon as you got home. Joe hugged you from behind, his arms nestled around your waist. “As soon as you finish packing you´ll come here with all your stuff, okay?” “Yes, Joe.”, you loosened his grip and turned around to face him. His lips met yours before you even finished the rotation. “I´ll miss you.” He genuinely meant it, you could see it in his gaze. And you´ll miss him too, very much, so you told him: “I´m going to miss you too, babe.” You liked that pet name so you imported it to your vocabulary as well. “Don´t forget to send me your passport details so Maddie can take of your esta for the trip.” “I promise. I really need to go now.” It dawned outside and you had about 60 minutes of underground travelling to get home ahead of you. You kissed Joe for the las time today and left his apartment. A weird feeling to be honest.

As soon as you got home you started the first round of laundry. You took your phone out of your bag and dialled Jens number. “OH MY GOD!!!!WHY DO YOU NOT ANSWER ME?!” Jen yelled into the phone. WHAT HAPPENED?!I THOUGHT SOMETHING HAPPENED TO-“ “Can you please stop shouting at me!!!”, you yelled back at her. A quiet “sorry” came from the other side of the line. She sounded kind of abashed. “It´s fine.”, you tried to soothe her: “I´m totally fine.” “You don’t feel sick anymore?”, Jen asked you curiously. “To be honest…I didn’t feel sick at all. I actually never felt happier.” “Y/n? What happened?”, you could basically see Jens face with the wide eyes and lips formed to an o right in front of your inner eyes. “To make it short: I think I´m in love and I finally had sex…multiple times.” You had to remove the phone from your ear, due to the loud squeaky screams coming out of the speaker. Jen was 34 years old but she behaved like a teenager when it came to these kind of topics. “YOU.HAVE.TO.TELL.ME.EVERYTHING.” You began to tell Jen about the dinner yesterday, but stopped with the details as soon as you told her about his apartment. “Girl, you need to give me more information.” You wanted to keep it to yourself, the only thing you revealed was the following: “He is such an awesome person. I could have not wished for somebody better to have my first sex with.” But Jen did not let go: “ You can get more in to detail when we meet next week!” You remembered, you had plans with Jen, but she would forgive you: “Oh Jen, I am so sorry! I need to cancel our dinner.” You could hear the disappointed in her voice: “Why?” You smiled into yourself because you could not believe what you were about to say: “I´m going to New York with Joe.” A gasp came from the other side of the phone. “You don´t!” “Oh yes I do!” You both squeaked together now. Jen interrupted the noises: “Damn, I woke up Cameron.” Her son was crying in the background. You could not supress a laugh. “Need to go y/n! We´ll text later?” She didn’t hear your yes because she already hung up. You looked around the bedroom, your suitcase was on top of the wardrobe. You teared it down from there and started to throw clothing in it.

About half an hour after you had started the packing you realised that you did have enough clothing for 6 days: enough underwear, dresses, socks, pants and shirts. You checked for the New York weather, it would be pretty changing. Most of your clothing were still in Germany with your father, you did not have a lot of stuff here, so you did not need to think about different outfit options. Basically, 90 percent of your wardrobe was in your suitcase, the rest was in the laundry machine. In the bathroom you began to pack all of your makeup and skin care, toothbrush and paste and some shampoo. That’s it, you thought to yourself. Just the passport, and some more paperwork you needed to take with you went straight into one of your tote bags. You had a huge collection, you had a stranger things one as well. You teared the one out of the pile and realised that Joe was on it. It was a stranger things 4 tote bag with Eddie Munson on it. Unbelievable, you walked around with his face on your bag for several months about two years ago, without realising it. You definitely fancied Steve more than Eddie. And now you were packing for a trip to New York with Joe.

You took a quick shower and got into a comfy lounge two piece. Again you looked around the apartment and threw every possible thing into your bag and suitcase that could become in handy. A book you had not touched for a lot of weeks now, your headphones and a charger. And now? You did not know what to do. It was 9 pm, your laundry machine had just finished. Well, Joe told you, you should come with your stuff as soon as you were done packing. You checked for all the electronic devices in your apartment to be turned off, closed the window in your bedroom and left the building with a suitcase and a tote bag over your shoulder.

The way to Clapham took a little longer, you´re suitcase was pretty heavy but somehow you managed to get to his house without looking at your phone once. You ringed the doorbell which did not have a name on it, and his voice came out of the speaker: “Yeah?” “It´s me.”, you said. The door automatically opened right away. Joe already came down the stairs and kissed you before he took all of your bags. “I missed you so, love.”, he mumbled while kissing you. With the bags in his hands, he easily climbed up the stairs to his apartment. He placed them right next to the entrance door and pulled you into the living room. Right on the other side of the entrance door where your suitcase was standing, Joe pushed you against the wall. He hungrily kissed you, you slightly opened your mouth so his tongue could slip in your mouth a little. He grabbed your thighs and brought them up into a right angle. You did not have any control now, everything that kept you in that position were your back at the wall and his arms holding you up. Your legs twined around his ass, your arms did so around his neck. Joe pressed his lips onto yours passionately.

Then it hit you: “Oh babe! The passport details” You jumped back to the floor, grabbed the passport and handed it to Joe. He took his phone out and sent a photo to his assistant. “You want to drink something?”, he turned to you. “Some water please.” He went to the kitchen counter right after winking at you saying: “Some water coming up.” You sat down on the sofa and tried to calm down from the hot but short make out session at the wall. Joe came to the sofa too and sat next to you. He laid back and pulled you into his arm. His jeans from earlier had changed into some sleeping trousers. Joe gently wiped away some strands of hair out of your face, your fingers intertwined. You both played with each other’s fingers. “So you were fast with packing.”, Joe mumbled into your hair, his chin rested on top of your head. “I just wanted to get back to you.” “Same love, same.” He kissed your hair. “I´m kind of overwhelmed about all of this, to be honest with you.”, you confessed. “Me too, probably not the way like you, but I would have never thought that I would be crazy in love with somebody just within a few days.” You startled: “What did you just say?”, you gazed at him. His brown eyes sparkled, you could not understand why, but you felt tears building up in yours. He nervously chuckled and ran his hand through his curls: “I think I´m in love with you.” There was nothing else to do than caressing his lips with yours. A tear ran down your face, Joe wiped it away. You could not say it, but he totally understood that you felt the same way. You moved closer together, cuddled, kissed, talked and laughed for hours. Until you both fell asleep.

To be continued…

[atheostic]

Atheist YouTube Masterpost (Update 2)

Apostate Aladdin - A look at Islam from an atheist perspective by a former Muslim.

Aron Ra - Mostly posts of his speeches at atheist conferences, responses to religious nonsense, and educational content relating to where the Bible gets science wrong as well as an awesome breakdown of major taxonomic sections.

Atheist Experience - A call-in show where anyone can call in to discuss religion. They prefer theist callers, but atheists who need advice on issues regarding being atheist (e.g. family conflict because of one’s atheism, how/if to come out, etc) are welcome to call in too.

Atheist Lowdown - Atheist Lowdown is a weekly secular news aggregate vlog intended for busy freethinkers, humanists, atheists, agnostics, and any combination thereof who want the latest coverage of religious violence and oppression, the efforts of likeminded nonbelievers, and other related stories. 

Cosmic Skeptic - A place for the discussion of philosophical topics ranging from the crucially important to the trivially interesting.

Dallas Wade – A channel with mostly video essays and reaction videos regarding Christianity.

Forrest Valkai – A channel by an evolutionary biologist where he talks about evolution and science as well as reacts to creationist videos. He’s very funny and friendly and his explanations are very approachable for laypeople of all levels.

Friendly Atheist - The YouTube channel of Hemant Mehta, a former member of the board of directors for Foundation Beyond Belief. He mostly discusses news and has a playlist where he discusses “Everything Wrong In Genesis in the Bible”. He also runs a website, friendlyatheist.com in case you prefer reading to viewing or listening.

Fundie to Frei - An ex-Jewish channel on "advice and awareness about growing up with religious fundamentalism and coping in the "afterlife" transition."

Genetically Modified Skeptic - An atheist look at various issues relating to religion.

Godless Bitches - The Godless Bitches is a podcast focusing on atheist issues from a feminist perspective featuring Vi La Bianca, Jenna Belk, Jen Aldrich, & guests. The show streams every 2nd & 4th Sundays of the month at 6pm directly after The Atheist Experience.

Godless Engineer - Focuses on response to religious videos. Also has a “Bible Study” series.

Godless Granny – “Atheist commentary on the Bible, women’s issues, LGBTQ issues, legal/ political and other current events. Intent is to invite discussion leading to critical thinking about religion and it’s effects on people.” If you’re interested in hearing from an older atheist who deconverted later in life,this is the channel for you.

Gutsick Gibbon – She’s a PhD student in Biological Anthropology, so her main area of interest is human evolution and debunking creationist misinformation. According to her, in her channel you can find content  “concerning primates, general zoology, paleontology, anthropology, and evolutionary biology.”

Holy Koolaid - A channel by Thomas Westbrook (a former Jehovah’s Witness) that features news, discussions about the Bible, discussions about the historicity of events in the Bible, and more. He has a playlist for “Nothing Fails Like Bible History” and also often looks at religious cults.

JaclynGlenn -  An atheist who talks about a variety of topics.

JeGaysus – I’m not really sure if he’s atheist (sometimes I think he might be, other times I’m not sure), but his gay Jesus persona is too funny not to share.

Jimmy Snow - A show with a mix of subject material, typically dealing with atheism and LGBT+-related stuff.

John Cedars - A range of videos aimed at dissecting the various teachings of Jehovah's Witnesses, as well as new developments in the religion. In particular, he tries to keep on top of the latest propaganda released by Watchtower by way of video rebuttals as much as possible.

Kristi Burke - An ex-Evangelical who discusses religion and atheism (mainly focuses on Christianity when talking about religion).

The Line - A call-in show similar to Atheist Experience started by Jimmy Snow.

Logicked – “Entertaining responses to bad arguments, with a focus on atheism and debunking religion.”

Matt Dillahunty - Matt Dillahunty’s personal YT channel.

Non-Prophets - The Non-Prophets focuses on atheism and the separation of church and state.

NonStampCollector - Lots of fantastic little animations regarding atheism.

Parenting Beyond Belief - Parenting Beyond Belief is a live call-in show every 2nd and 4th Saturday at 1pm Central dedicated to peer support and guidance for secular parents and those wanting to learn more about non-religious families.

Paulogia -  A former Christian takes a look at the claims of Christians, wherever science is being denied in the name of ancient books.

Professor Stick - Mostly does reply videos to debunk pseudoscience on the internet.

Prophet of Zod - Everything from satirical atheist cartoons to a guy with a static head and no discernible facial features talking about atheism-related stuff. His most popular section is a series on “Dumb Things People Say to Atheists”, where he very calmly and respectfully explains why what the thing is dumb and how best to respond.

Rachel Oates - A channel which deals with a variety of sujects, from poetry to atheist news to book reviews of religious books and more. 

Secular Sexuality -  Secular Sexuality is a weekly call-in show live from Austin, Texas every Thursday at 7pm CT where they talk about sex from a secular perspective.

Shannon Q - An atheist who talks about a variety of topics.

Secular Spirit - An ex-Muslim who talks about religion and atheism.

Sir Sic – A reaction video channel where the host is a cartoon knight.

Skeptics & Scoundrels – A very new channel by an atheist ex-JW. I personally like him already. Before talking about why he disagrees with the paster he’s responding to, he makes a point of finding something nice to say about the person (“Your beard is cool – baby birds could nest in that thing!”), which I think it’s a neat and unique approach. He doesn’t have a lot of videos yet but give it time. :)

The SkepTick – A pretty fun channel of mostly reaction vids reacting to religious videos.

Sound of Science – Mostly a reaction video blog regarding unscientific beliefs.

Suris the Skeptic - He tackle issues of religion, morality, philosophy, and a touch of science.

Talk Heathen - Talk Heathen is a weekly call-in television show in Austin, Texas geared toward long-form and on-going dialogue with theists & atheists about religion, theism, & secularism.

Telltale - Typically looks at cults and religion-related news.

The Thinking Atheist – Typically video essays and the visual version of a podcast by the same name. The host’s voice sounds exactly like an old-timey radio announcer. lol

TMM – A channel mostly featuring reactions to Christian content.

Truth Wanted - A show similar to Atheist Experience and Talk Heathen, it focuses on how and why people believe what they believe, and how you can talk about beliefs in more effective ways.

Viced Rhino - Response videos to pseudo-scientific nonsense on YouTube.