#jemima the plague girl

[idiotwithanipad]

Kinda maybe sort of a part 2 to the Plague Ghosts and Robin thing🫢 I couldn't resist. Self indulgence won yet again...

(Trigger warning: Death, sickness, description of a full plague pit, child sickness, sores, pus)

Don't worry, this times there's SOME cute stuff with Robin... Or maybe that's just sad, but let's pretend it's cute😂

Agnes watched solemnly as the heavy sheet was wrapped tightly around Maude's newly deceased body. Her face frozen in one of peace and rest, thankfully; after all the pain, discomfort and suffering, Maude finally closed her eyes for the final time that morning. After turning her face away from an unseen guest whom she'd grown used to. Jeff took Agnes by the shoulders as John and Walter bowed their heads for a moment, clasping their hands about their middles and biting their chapped lips.

"Perhaps we'd better do it sooner rather than later?..." Nigel suggested softly to their left. The village nodded in agreement, never taking their damp eyes from Maude's form beneath the sheet.

"Yeah. Before more rats come..." Mick's lips quivered and his jagged teeth chattered together like castanets as he slowly rose his head to look up at the sky, his attempt at willing away his tears.

"Yeah, but- be gentle with 'er. She was a good friend to us all, really" Agnes spoke, forcing a weak smile as Jeff rubbed her shoulders, nodding slowly. The whole village erupted into a series of hushed agreements and nods, they too forced themselves to smile.

John and Walter positioned themselves at Maude's shoulders and feet, each taking an end of the sheet, lifting Maude from the grass and slowly carrying her over to a deep pit, a few hundred yards away from the houses.

"Gently, boys..." Jeff reminded them, wiping a tear from his eye with his newly discoloured finger. With a final nod and a weak smile, John and Walter lowered their friend down into the pit. It had been getting shallower recently, since the plague hit, since the figure was seen. Bodies of the recently deceased began to line the bottom of the soil pit, every day, a new body was added, another old friend mourned.

An upthrust of foul air was forced out of the pit as Maude's body landed quite roughly atop one of the other's beneath her. John and Walter reeled back as a barrage of flies flocked around them. The two men quickly covering their mouths with their sleeves and turning their heads away so they wouldn't catch wind of that awful stench. They took a few steps back and caught their breaths, their eyes remained on the quickly growing mound of lost friends and neighbours.

Not one of the villagers could muster any words, only grimaces of loss and sickness, a sickness of the heart and body, for they were all doomed to this pit. They knew it.

Not far away from them, a tiny sound broke the silence. A soft lilting of words, sweet words, words from an innocent who hadn't yet grown wise to the situation, and one who the village folk wouldn't let anywhere near the pit.

"If you tell them you're sorry, they'll feel better" Jemima suggested. She stood idly, her poorly thatched straw doll clasped in her arms. She looked up at nothing, she spoke to nothing, and she reacted to nothing.

"You're nice to me. Are you bad to others?... Then why are we sick?...I don't know either...are you sick too?"

Mick was the first to notice the small girl standing alone, speaking to an unseen guest. His snaggled jaw cracked open slightly as he fought off another phlegm firing cough and picked at the oozing rash on his brow.

"Don't be sad, I didn't mean to make you sad... I'm sure you didn't mean to make us all sick... Please don't cry"

His eyes frozen on Jemima and his jaw now slack, his eyes bulging from their sockets like boiled eggs, Mick reached back towards the others and clasped onto the first thing he could feel.

"OI! Watch me 'air!" Nigel grunted, rubbing at his scalp and swooping his very tangled and greasy locks over his shoulder away from Mick's prying fingers. Mick could only stutter and squeak as he pointed towards Jemima, the others soon noticing the strange sight.

"Maybe if I sing to you, you'll feel better? My Ma told me this song..."

The girl began humming her 'merry' tune, now holding the doll by its hand and skipping around in a circle around nothing, still looking up at nothing, and smiling at nothing.

All of them, Mick, Nigel, John, Walter, Jeff and Agnes shared concerned glances at each other briefly, mumbling quietly about what could cause her to behave this way. Hunger, thirst, delusion, sickness?... Loneliness?

Agnes stepped forward, followed by Jeff and the others. She put on a brave face, pretending like she hadn't just witnessed her dear friend be tossed to the dreaded pit.

"Jemi?... You okay? Doin' your little song?" Agnes crouched slightly to reach the girl's level, Jeff's hand remained against her shoulder.

Jemima nodded slowly and pointed towards the nothing that she spoke to.

"He felt sad so I cheered him up"

Agnes followed Jemima's pointed finger and her eyes saw nothing. Agnes took both of Jemima's hands in her own and turned the girl to face her.

"Swee'heart, there's nothin' there. You might be tired, why don't you come for a lie down, yeah?" Agnes's voice cracked slightly as she gave Jemima a sincere smile. The girl's brow creased in confusion.

"Yes there is. There. The man with fur and big fluffy hair. He sounds like he just learned to talk, maybe he never got told how to?" Agnes's blood ran cold, Jemima's description of the figure thawing out the frozen memory of Maude's last night alive. The description matching, to a point, the one given by her late friend.

Agnes, frozen in place, sweat prickling at her scalp, looked towards the empty space behind Jemima. Seeing nothing. She instinctively inched the child closer and clasped her shoulders now.

"And, he's there- now?"

"Yeah he is, he's right the-...oh. He's gone now..."

Later that evening, after being given a nightly kiss on the brow from Agnes and Jeff, Jemima kissed her doll on it's 'head' and settled onto the straw pillow, coughing and spluttering. She remained this way for countless minutes, the sound of the crickets outside being the only sound to fill the deathly silence.

The child lie still, entranced, watching the flickering flame of a candle at her bedside, when she heard the voice.

"You sicker?" The figure returned.

Jemima sat up slowly, trying not to cough. She clasped the doll to her chest and stared at the creature.

"I think so. Why did you go away earlier? I thought you liked my song" Jemima looked almost betrayed as she lowered her eyes away from the figure and focused on her doll, stroking it's arm to 'soothe' it.

"No. Did. Just- not want see-..." The strange man-thing bent forward away from the wall where it stood, slowly making its way over to Jemima's bed. It's lips twitched and contorted themselves, as though trying to form a word which up until now had been unfathomable.

"... Pit. Drop. Dead family-.." A sullen shadow crossed the creature's face as it sat on the bed by Jemima's feet.

"Wish, could help. You child, you young. Should not be death yet for you" The creature's eyes flicked down towards the earthy floor, shining dimly in the flickering candle light like distant lanterns inside the evening fog.

Jemima clutched her doll closer and her eyes twitched in discomfort, dread. The creature seemed to notice and ceased it's explanation. It could barely look her in the eye without starting to choke up.

"I don't believe what aunty Maude said. If you brought the sickness here, you'd be mean to me, not nice" Jemima assured, placing the doll back against the pillow behind her as she sat up in the bed and crossed her legs.

The creature had no response, it just gave a single nod, it's nostrils and lips twitched briefly and it once again, turned it's face away back towards the darkness. It's almost human claw came up to brush against its unkempt fur. The other claw reaching higher. Towards it's face.

Jemima tugged her sleeve into the palm of her hand, crawling over to the twisted creature, reaching up her covered palm.

"Here... Let me. There's no need to cry~"

[shebeafancyflapjack]

Headcanons about how good the ghosts hug and what Ghost!Alison has to look forward to once she joins them.

Kitty - Will always hug anyone who will let her but is incredibly clingy and eventually will need to be pried off finger by finger at some point, even she finds it difficult to stop when she wants to, girl has serious touch-starvation, especially with other women.

Thomas - Similar to Kitty, gives pretty good hugs, might try to sneak in some hair stroking...sniffing? Ew, no, he's made it creepy even though he assures you he's being chaste and you probably wanna step back, he just needs to learn about boundaries.

Humphrey (head bit) - obviously he can't really reciprocate but is happy to be carried around and hugged like a comfort toy that can also be a good confidante.

Humphrey (body bit) - surprisingly gives very good hugs but like....would you want to? Also is he hugging or just trying to see who is there, it's hard to tell.

Pat - gives very nice Dad hugs but just be very careful of the arrow. Prefers mutual shoulder rubs more often.

Fanny - if she's in a very affectionate mood she might pat you on the head or the back of your hand. Trick her into thinking you're one of her pets and she will suddenly get very sentimental, crushing you in her arms.

Captain - Has the potential to give the best Dad hugs but needs a LOT of practice and learning not to be so rigid and military because he will welcome a hug but it's a bit like trying to cuddle a lamp post until he let's his defences down.

Robin - Gives the tightest and fluffiest hugs, closest thing you will feel to being hugged by a bear that won't try to kill you, just make sure to hold your nose until you're used to the smell and maybe try not to leave your head close to his beard because those fleas can jump.

Julian - Again, would you want to? He probably wouldn't. Try if you really want but maybe settle for a friendly arm around the shoulder and you'll both be content.

Mary (were she still around) - Proper comfy Mum hugs but like Robin you have to be able to bear the smell.

Plague ghosts - These guys are all amazing huggers but no one outside their circle will ever know. Jemima also can be very affectionate and clingy once people stop being afraid of her.

[penny-anna]

Maybe Robin was right but the ghost who moved on was Jemima the plague girl

[bbcghostssidecharactertournament]

Betty Cooper: Appears in S2 EP7 The Ghost of Christmas and S5 EP7 A Christmas Gift. Mike's overbearing yet loving mum.

Jemima: Appears in S1 EP1 Who Do You Think You Are? and S2 EP5 Bump in the Night. The ghost of a girl who died of the plague. She lives in the pantry and only seems to be able to sing ring a ring o'roses.

[unusual-ly]

Ly’s Six Idiots/ThemThere Fanworks Masterpost

Fanfiction

Never Did Run Smooth - Bill (2015)

~ The first Gabrian fanfiction ~ Ian is finally free of the Earl of Croydon. A chance encounter with Bill lands him in a new home, with a new job, and new friends, including Gabriel. Both are running from their past. Both have blood on their hands. The course of true love never did run smooth... [#never did run smooth fic]

Such Sweet Sorrow - Bill (2015)

~ The Ian backstory fic ~ Ian was always a rambunctious child, no different than any other boy in Croydon. When he is hired as the earl's new servant, all he thinks will come of it is money for his struggling family. What he gets, however, is broken [#such sweet sorrow fic]

Prompt Drabbles - Bill (2015)

Drabbles based on prompts I receive on Tumblr, canon/NDRS verse and uni!AU

You Find New Family - BBC Ghosts

One-shot collection. Humphrey befriends Jemima, the plague girl who hides in the pantry of the unused second kitchen, and eventually adopts her as his daughter. Slowly, he brings her out of her shell and she gets to know the other residents of Button House [#you find new family fic]

Thanktival Bang! - Bill (2015), BBC Ghosts, Horrible Histories

Holiday prompt event 2021. Mainly Gabrian and Jemima Bone

12 Days of Thanktival - Bill (2015), BBC Ghosts

Holiday prompt event 2022. Mainly Gabrian, Shakeaway and Jemima Bone

Musical Rewrites

Rewriting lyrics of songs from musicals to fit Six Idiots characters

Castle On A Cloud - BBC Ghosts, Jemima

On The Steps Of The Palace - Bill (2015), Gabriel

Still Holding My Hand - BBC Ghosts, Jemima and Humphrey

This Is Not Love - BBC Ghosts, Kitty

Jonny Don’t Go - BBC Ghosts, Isabelle

Playlists

Gabrian

Jemima Bone

Other

The Autistic Ghosts in Button House - BBC Ghosts

A list of autistic traits shown by the ghosts throughout the series

Memes - BBC Ghosts, Bill (2015), Horrible Histories, Yonderland

Arospec Headcanons - BBC Ghosts

Robin (aromantic) / Thomas (aromantic) / Kitty (lithromantic) /

University AU - Bill (2015)

Tag for a modern uni!AU with the Bill cast

v Tags v

#moonah stona (Robin, BBC Ghosts)

#oh its numbers (Mary, BBC Ghosts)

#left a bit (Humphrey, BBC Ghosts)

#and a r a i n b o w (Kitty, BBC Ghosts)

#damn your eyes (Thomas, BBC Ghosts)

#andimettheking (Mick, BBC Ghosts)

#do you want a glass of milk (Nigel, BBC Ghosts)

#Jemima Bone (BBC Ghosts)

#don’t stab the messenger (Ian, Bill (2015))

#crazy in the coconut (Gabriel, Bill (2015))

#Gabrian (Bill (2015))

#Shakeaway (Bill (2015))

#me or ruth (Elf, Yonderland)

#all i need is a quill (Scribe Elder Ho-Tan, Yonderland)

#achieving enlightenment (Geoff the demon, Yonderland)

#solar powered paperclips (Detective Mountebank AKA Leslie John Leslie, Yonderland)

#the burden of beauty (the Crone, Yonderland)

#buns and or cakesandpies (Edith, Yonderland)

#cake bake by the lake (Cake Bake Ladies, Yonderland)

#the wisp (Boo the Clown, Yonderland)

#thanktival bang 2021

#12 days of thanktival

[ailendolin]

i went a little crazy, but! for the bbc ghosts ask game: 3, 5, 8, 15, 20, 21, 26

Thank you!

3. How would you feel if you couldn't see the ghosts, but knew they were there, like Mike?

I would feel exactly like Mike in series 1 and be paranoid about them being in the same room as me. Him showering with clothes on or going somewhere else to use the bathroom? So relatable. That would be 100 % me.

5. If you were a ghost living in the house, would you rather be upstairs with the main nine ghosts, or downstairs with the plague ghosts?

Look, I love the Plague Ghosts with my whole heart but I'd pick the upstairs ghosts for the simple reason that I won't be stuck in a basement the whole time. I want to watch the sunrise with Thomas and the stars with Robin so upstairs it is.

8. Which ghost do you think you'd get along with the best?

Oh, this one's difficult. Fanny, I think. Or perhaps Humphrey.

15. If you could go back in time and live in the house/on the property at the same time as one of the ghosts when they were alive, who would you pick?

Oh, I'd pick Robin's era because I want to see a mammoth. Probably wouldn't last a day but who cares? I also wouldn't mind spending a day or two with the Plague Ghosts - before Mick left for London, of course.

20. Tag 5 favourite Ghosts fandom content creators!

@larryrickard because you also write Norne and do it so beautifully.

@the-20th-century-girl because of the wonderful gifsets you share with us.

@unusual-ly because I never thought about Jemima Bone until I read one of your fics.

@ginevralinton because you write wonderful fics & I really need to read more of them.

@fandomsmeantheworldtome because you made a Nigel gifset for me once and it still makes me so happy.

21. Are there any historical periods you wish we'd have gotten to see a ghost/ghosts from but didn't?

Not really, no. My first instinct was to say something between Robin and the Plague Ghosts but tbh the span of time between their periods just highlights how long Robin has been around and how different the world must look to him now, and I like that.

26. Favourite one-liner?

Probably, "I'm going to drown myself in the lake." Although, "You're dicked in the knob," is a favourite as well.

Ask Game can be found here.

[tamsinbeybey-she-no-porcupine]

Imagine a Librarians / Ghosts crossover.

-Robin announcing that he went through a Magic door like in the impro and played chess with Excalibur the flying sword

-the Lits then appearing at Button House because of the high concentration of Ghosts (maybe due to a broken ley line?) And posing as guests but they all can see the Ghosts and find out that it really isn't that kind of haunted house.

-Flynn and Jake playing chess against Robin and Julian

-Kitty and Cassie being the sweetest , bubbliest together

-Cassie bonding with Fanny because they are both science girls especially maths girls

-Baird and Allison bonding over their mom-friend roles

-Ezekiel getting into arguments about stealing with Pat and talking about the universe and Aliens with Robin

-Coronel Baird and the Captain bonding over their military history and their whole way to approach missions and problems because they were both soldiers

-Jake and Humphrey talking about History and Art and Art History and architecture for hours and tracking down humphrey's body so Humphrey can give Jake a house tour.

-Jake and Thomas fighting about Byron and poetry in general. It gets nasty Thomas goes into the lake before Jake helps him with his own poetry by talking about the true meaning and beauty of poetry

-Jake trying to learn as much as possible from Robin.

-Cassie making an impression on Julian when she uses mathemagics to help him with his online golf

-Mike and Baird just hanging out with each other being the most normal ones, adoring their very special significant others

-Robin being fascinated by Cassie's powers

-Julian getting a talking to from Baird and being super impressed afterwards because she means business

-Pat recruiting Ezekiel to food Club

-Ezekiel and Julian bonding over being tricksters/the Art of spin

-Jenkins showing up and impressing all of the Ghosts and they all swap stories from their times. Like when he remembers that he once was a guest at Button House. Or the Ghosts ask him what he did during their respective lifeteime etc.

-Jenkins bonding with Pat over their caretaker roles

-the Captain and Jenkins bonding over Stories about ancient battles

-Humphrey and Jenkins sharing a similar humour also the years of being alone also Humphrey is keen on Arthurian legend (my HC) and Jenkins is Galahad so.

-Jenkins impressing Fanny because he uses the proper etiquette from her time and is a true gentleman

-Cassie (aka a "Cassandra, a remarkable young woman") bonding with the Captain over the limpet mine project because she hast questions and he tells her about some difficult calculations and she solves them in a few heartbeats and he tells her how they could have used someone with her gifts back then but that his Lieutenant was very bright and he was glad to have him there and because her gaydar pings and she tells him about her Vampire (ex-) girlfriend.

-Ezekiel hanging out with Jemima ,playing dolls, because she reminds him of the time when he was a lost kid and because that's exactly whom he swore to help

-Flynn just being utterly enarmoured by the Plague Ghosts and spending a lot of time with them.

-ezekiel arguing with Fanny over her views on Australia. When Jake points out that he was indeed a thief he exclaims that that's besides the point

-also I feel like the salt of the earth, worked on an oil rig, cowboy with the 190 iq, love for travel, art , poetry etc., with the gentle smile and warm brown eyes and strong arms because of the martial arts would probably be worth a "Good Lord" upon first sight. (Flynn also looks like he fits the bill but I feel his energy is too manic in comparison. Jake is closer in demeanour to Havers, Adam and the Chap with the arms). Also I just really love Jake)

[lythinksabittoomuch]

No, but when you think about it there are a disproportionate amount of ghosts from the last 100 years (Pat, Fanny, Julian, Cap) than any other period of time. We already know about Annie, so it’s highly likely that many ghosts only haunted for a few hundred years or so and then got sucked off. (Moved on)

SO ANYWAY…. That leads me to the ideas of the older ghosts telling stories and starting with “and then Alexander and I…” and Alison/the other ghosts are like who the fuck is that.

And then it starts happening more and the names get more ridiculous to the point it’s like Mary going “And Frumplsteeds and I’s we was walking.”

And the younger ghosts can’t quite tell it Robin/Mary/Humphrey are just playing with them

+ Bonus, the plague ghosts and Jemima the plague girl vouching 100% that Frumplsteeds was a real and very beloved ghost.

[lifedistractions]

“Yes please, Jemima.”

[shebeafancyflapjack]

Ghosts Fic Masterlist

My works so far.

Daddy's Little Huntress (Alison discovers a cavewoman ghost on Barclay's land who she thinks might be Robin's daughter.)

Do Ghosts Dream of Dead Sheep? (A mysterious object puts the ghosts to sleep. Ongoing, 8/? Chapters. Found Family, Alison main pov, various relationships, mystery/thriller).

Home Is Where I Choose To Go (One-shot, 9k, Found Family, teenage Mia Cooper comes to her aunts and uncles for support, fluff and emotional hurt/comfort).

The Lady of Bone Hall (One-shot, 9k, Alison finds the ghost of Sophie Bone. Various relationships, exploration of loneliness and religious guilt).

One Last Move (One-shot, 5k, Robin & Alison, Robin & Julian queerplatonic. Post-canon Dealing with grief, friendship).

We All Fall Down (One-shot, 4k, Robin finds Jemima the plague ghost in the kitchen on the night Alison leaves them. Fluff, comfort, kidfic)

.

More Than A Monster series (Robin-centric, various characters)

Lost Soul (How Robin once lost his mind - 5 chapters. Robin & Original Characters, emotional and physical whump, conditioning and attempted SA)

A Man Called "Rohr" (How Robin met Elizabeth, Clarence, Godric & William - 4 chapters, Robin & Original Characters, found family. Emotional hurt/comfort. Tw for abuse, attempted SA, torture, mental illness, discussions of suicide.)

More Than A Monster (After Sophie leaves, Robin starts to form his current crew - 5 chapters. Robin & Humphrey, Robin & Mary, Robin & Annie, Robin & Kitty, Annie/Mary, Robin/Mary, Robin/Mary/Annie, Robin & Alison, Mary & Kitty, emotional hurt/comfort and found family, exploring relationships, angst with happy ending).

Kitty's Destiny (One-shot. Robin & Kitty, Kitty & Original animal character, Kitty & Annie/Mary, extra chapter from MTAM, reconciliation, of course Kitty is a horse girl).

Find Me In The Stars (One-shot. Time skips, Robin & Original Characters, Robin & Mary, Robin & Annie, Robin & Alison & Mia, emotional whump and comfort, dealing with grief and loss).

[archerygun]

@pinballlizard Glad to see nobody has coherent memories of this show at all it was a fever dream we all woke up from and only have vague recollections of.

Esme would terrify Kitty like she would shit herself on the spot being in Esme’s vicinity. You know the reaction the ghosts have to Jemima the plague girl? Times that by nine.

Okay, BBC Ghosts is objectively one of the best pieces of television ever made. But there was another (C)BBC show about ghosts. And I feel like it’s my duty to tell everyone about it.

(Particularly because I was banned from watching it as a kid and I have this oddly clear childhood memory of one episode - like I remember the full plot along with quotes - that apparently doesn’t exist? I digress.)

It was called Dani’s Castle (sequel to one I didn’t watch called Dani’s House) and it was set in like an Irish castle but nobody alive in it was Irish, just London and Mancunian. And much like Ghosts, Dani finds out an old relative has just died and inherits the castle, except another relative also inherits it and they find out that they have to deal with each other for the duration of the show (they aren’t happy about it).

AND THE GHOSTS.

So this disaster right here is Gabe (Gabriel Dunraven, think he’s 19th century):

He is a terrible ghost. He does not want to be a ghost. He wants to be polite. He’s Thomas Thorne if Thomas Thorne was genuinely a really nice guy and top boyfriend material but also had severe anxiety. He literally just wants to be nice to people and deserves all the love in the world.

Oh also, he may be a terrible ghost that really does not want to be a ghost, but he figures it’s better than being alive because

Social anxiety

People touching him

He had allergies

Familial pressure to be a good

HE DOES NOT LIKE BUGS

Flesh sucks and he can teleport now

And then his sister Esme, the icon herself:

ABSOLUTE GOBLIN. Mercilessly destroys her brother at all given opportunities. Sibling bickering 101. Not a fan of living mortals, loves being a ghost because she can be a scary little shit and haunt people into leaving the house. Sadistic as hell. I wanted to be her when I was a kid.

Like she is all gremlin little girls rolled into one and given a chainsaw.

AND JEDWARD WAS ON IT. I’M NOT MAKING THIS UP I’M 100% SERIOUS.

Like say what you will the 2010s were a time to be alive. My mum banned me from watching this show as a kid because it was ‘too adult’ and I um. I don’t know what the fuck she was talking about. I rewatched it out of curiosity at the ‘adult’ content and I genuinely don’t know.

(Do not go watch it, does not hold up, I promise).

[pointnumbersixteen]

Random Notes from a 4:30AM Rewatch of the Front-y Parts of Who Do You Think You Are?

1) It makes me sad that Heather Button was ninety-nine years old and entirely alone. 

2) So, Humphrey seems to have full control of his body when his head is perched in it’s precarious proper position at his neck (as we see in episode 6 of both seasons), partial control when they’re in direct contact (this episode, he tells his body to lift him up and it starts to before dropping him), and no control whatsoever when they’re apart (see all of the ‘over-here’s when Humphrey and his body are in the same episode). 

3) But Humphrey wouldn’t have needed to have to tell his body to lift him up if literally anyone taller than his decapitated neck and shoulders had let him stand in front. 

4) I love the hanging? ...mural? Whatever it is on Heather Button’s wall. I kind of wish modern home decor was still like that. 

5) I love how Heather Button didn’t bother to stick around to let Thomas finish his sentence. 

6) And none of them bother to stick around to let him finish his poem, except Humphrey’s head, which got ditched.

7) You know what I’d like? I copy of the Button House floor plans, with notations on who sleeps in which bedrooms. I still can’t keep the interior floor plan straight and I’m curious as to where the ghost bedrooms (well, besides Cap’s Fanny’s and Kitty’s, which we know) are placed in the house.

8) I enjoy that Ben Willbond is nearly too big for that bed. His head is at the headboard. His feet are at the footboard.  

9) Do y’all know how excited I’d be if I inherited a house with that many old books in it? Can you imagine what that room smells like? I bet it’s magnificent. 

10) I feel like I’ve never seen a gatehouse on this show?

11) I just think Pat’s really adorable in the bit where he suggests they try haunting.

12) I’m a little bit alarmed that Mike decided to use the garden tap water to make tea without first tasting it himself...

13) I love the way Cap says ‘None of those are plural, but...’ It’s like he made his voice sound a little extra-refined when he did it. 

14) I just realized that Jemima appears to be holding a little rag doll and now I’m sad again. It’s just always blended into the wraps on her arms to me.

15) I love how Cap asks Kitty is she’s finished after she interrupts him for her little pep-talk rather than snapping at her.

16) It might just be things bunching and/or draping weirdly in their haunting scene, but do we think the Captain has anything in his pockets? 

[bbcghostssidecharactertournament]

Jemima: Appears in S1 EP1 Who Do You Think You Are? and S2 EP5 Bump in the Night. The ghost of a girl who died of the plague. She lives in the pantry and only seems to be able to sing ring a ring o'roses.

Sophie Bone: Appears in flashbacks in S3 EP1 The Bone Plot and S5 EP4 En Francais. Humphrey's wife (not by choice). Tried to kill the queen, will not learn English and had a secret caveman ghost friend she didn't know about. No one is doing it like her.

I hate to pit two queens against each other, blame the randomiser

[buttonhouseparty]

The Ghosts Try ASMR

Super-niche but never mind. I was watching ASMR to help me sleep and then I got the idea to write this, so damn you insomnia, you win again. Headcanon daftness coming up.

LADY B: Instinctively revolted by the whole concept of ASMR, finds it cringey and most indecent. Disapproves of most of the content creators - “A LADY does not expose herself to the world that way!” - and male ASMRtists make her come over all peculiar. Will grudgingly accept 1. old school towel-folding tutorials and 2. this specific GentleWhispering one about dining etiquette and which fork to use when. 

KITTY: Adores any of kind of personal attention role play, satisfying her craving for connection and intimacy. Loves close-up smiling and eye contact - she finds the illusion of being seen rather delicious after centuries of invisibility. Forms intense attachments to her favourite creators and considers them true friends. She watches to calm down and relax, does not actually experience euphoric paresthesia (lovely brain tingles).

CAPTAIN: Claims that as a man of action, all that relaxation nonsense is of no interest to him. Actually finds lots of the sensory triggers unbearably irritating and like Fanny he is unnerved that some of it is apparently a bit sexy. Then he discovers male-voiced informational videos, is shocked to find he gets intense tingles (“good lord”) and is enthralled. Cue three-hour marathons of TheFrenchWhisperer murmuring deeply about the history of Roman warfare.* 

ROBIN: Really is a man of action, can’t be bothered with sitting down to watch it. However he quite enjoys mukbang ASMR, not so much for the eating noises but because he appreciates the beautiful sight of a huge spread of food. Especially if it’s bum and chips.

MARY: We’ve all seen her reaction to Rice Krispies, “They sounds like tiny people!” She’s definitely into tapping and crinkling sounds. Also likes cooking videos, especially those cute ones where people make miniature food using dolls house utensils. 

JULIAN: Initially interested because of the pretty ladies, quickly becomes bored when he realises they’re not going to take their tops off. His interest is briefly piqued when Robin mentions he can show him videos of people eating bum, but these turn out not to be as stimulating as Julian had hoped.

THOMAS: Initially interested because of the pretty ladies, quickly becomes fascinated and a bit obsessive. Like Kitty, he finds ASMR helps him to feel less lonely, and he forms intense crushes on his faves. It’s lucky he can’t type because he would write embarrassing odes to his favourite creators in the comments and get quietly blocked by everyone.

HUMPHREY: Mesmerised by visual stimuli such as finger fluttering and hand movements. (Imagine getting scalp tingles if all you are is a head. Wow.)

PAT: There’s evidence ASMR doesn’t appeal so much to extroverts, and Pat is a bit too gregarious to really get it. However, we all know he enjoys a good TED Talk and is a persistent joiner-inner. So he might ask to sit next to Cap while he watches his informational videos. He would be permitted to do this as long as he kept his lips zipped. Cap feels vulnerable when he’s experiencing tingles - it’s a slight loss of control - so the fact that he’d allow Pat to join him is proof of their close intimacy.

PLAGUE VILLAGERS: Unboxing videos. They are pretty chill themselves (wouldn’t we all feel soothed by Nigel offering us a calming glass of milk) and wish they could make their own videos describing how to fix the old boiler. But even if they could show up on a recording, it would have to be voiceover-only because their faces are distinctly un-relaxing to behold. Jemima knows lots of playground tracing rhymes but unfortunately has an unerring ability to make them creepy. Poor Jemima.

* This is my personal ASMR kink so I’m projecting, but also I bet I’m right

[plaguegirll]

ALSO I GOT JEMIMA BACK!!!!!! MY PLAGUE GIRLL!!!!!!!!!!

[ailendolin]

I have been watching ST Prodigy and can't get this idea for a BBC Ghosts Star Trek AU out of my head where the ghosts are holograms on an old, rundown ship Alison and Mike find drifting in space.

More thoughts on that under the cut:

the ship is an old training vessel for cadets that has been damaged in a battle and abandoned a long time ago

the holograms all represent different departments within the Federation: the Captain represents security, Fanny science, Thomas linguistics, Pat diplomacy, Julian command (though everyone secretly agrees that Fanny is more suited for the job), Robin tactics, Humphrey operations, Kitty morale, Annie flight control, Mary medicine and the Plague Ghosts engineering

some of the holograms have glitches, most obvious in Humphrey who's sometimes just a floating head without a body and sometimes just a body without a head (and sometimes both in different places at once) and Mary who panics every time she has to treat phaser burns, insisting she can smell them

none of them can interact with the physical world outside of their respective stations though Julian keeps on trying to

Thomas's programming got messed up when Cadet Francis Button thought it would be fun to put him in a holodeck scenario he couldn't win - his own Kobayashi Maru, so to speak - and see how long it would take him to break. None of the other holograms know how often he died in the duel scenario Francis programmed before the Captain put an end to it but they know it irreversibly changed him and made him unfit for combat situations

the former crew also messed with the original engineering hologram. Someone wasn't happy with it being a woman (Jean), so they duplicated and changed her. Unsatisfied with the attitude of the male counterpart they created (Walter), they made another one and then another one until the engine room was filled with a dozen holograms carrying a piece of the knowledge of the original that couldn't be pieced back together into one single hologram

Robin's speech programming was rough from the beginning on. He was one of the first hologram ever, a prototype, and got damaged during an attempted hostile takeover. The engineers did their best to help him but their own glitchy programming prevented them from accessing his code so Robin has been left struggling to communicate

Alison and Mike aren't too happy about sharing their ship with a bunch of weird holograms at first, especially when they realise the ship doesn't allow them to deactivate them

(finding the hologram of a little girl that isn't listed anywhere in the logs hiding in the vents around the holodeck and singing creepily to herself doesn't really help)

over time the holograms grow on them, though. They help them restore power and get the ship maneuverable again, make sure Alison and Mike know what they're doing and teach them all they know about the Federation and operation of a Starfleet vessel

with Alison and Mike's help, the holograms grow beyond their programming. Robin's speech improves, Humphrey's head and body are seen together more often, the Captain relaxes a little about possible intruders ...

eventually, Alison and Mike build them their own portable transmitters that allow the holograms to go wherever they please, both on and off the ship

Pat, realising they can now touch things, suggests they teach each other their respective tools of the trade. Mary learns how to fly, Robin spends hours in the lab with Fanny learning about the stars, the engineers are keen on learning about history and languages, Humphrey manages to coax Jemima out of the vents and so on

I'm not sure where I'm going with this. I just really, really like the idea of the ghosts as holograms that evolve past their programming and become part of the world around them again because two chaotic humans happened upon their ship in the middle of nowhere and decided to give them a chance.