#jealousy and effort to get their feelings out is definitely one of my fav thing to read/watch

[ponuchuu]

as much as i like a good ol pining love story i kinda dont like to see a female's character whole worth is this one man she has a crush on

[bucky-bucket-barnes]

Bucky Barnes X Reader (Last Updated 1/27/2022)

All works below are in chronological order. I strive to write inclusive fiction, especially for women of color. If you would like to request something or have any questions about my blog please look at my navigation post and happy reading!

🧸 - fluff

💔 - angst

🔪 - enemies to lovers

💛 - personal fav

Series:

↬ The Two of Us Masterlist:  🔪💔🧸💛

You and Bucky go to investigate the phenomenon happening in Westview, New Jersey. While attempting to understand the issue, you yourselves are sucked into Wanda’s world of pretend. Now, you believe yourselves to be the happily married Mr. and Mrs. Barnes; in real life, you are most definitely not a happy pair. It is up to you and Bucky to piece together what’s happening while dealing with one another inside the hex.

My Strange Affliction 🔪💔🧸

Sex. Money. Fame. James “Bucky” Barnes is one spoiled son of a bitch who really gets to have it all in this world. With his band, My Strange Affliction, taking off into stardom, he’s a seemingly unstoppable force. Well, that was until a scandal broke out and he’s recorded beating the shit out of a member of his band’s longtime rival, Loki from Golden Horn. With a rocky perception in the public eye, his PR team decides in order to help his image he needs to be paired with his total opposite. Someone sweet, meek, and most of all, someone who can put up with Bucky’s bullshit. That lucky bastard appears to be you.

One Shots / Mini Series:

↬ Singing In the Rain Part 1/2 & Singing In the Rain Part 2/2:  🧸

You leave the compound to go home on a stormy night. Barnes isn’t too keen on the idea of the new girl walking home all by herself in such weather and decides to drive you home. (bucky x civilian!reader) 

↬ Moving On:  💔

After Bucky had been missing for a year, you had presumed him dead. Time passed, yet you seemed unable to move on from his death. That was until a familiar face came to your doorstep one winter night. (bucky x civilian!reader) 

↬ Bucky Bitchass Barnes to the Rescue:  🔪🧸

In an attempt to escape from hectic life as an Avenger, you decided to go out on a date. Unfortunately, you got stood up. While Bucky hates you, he hates seeing you embarrassed more and decides to fill in for your M.I.A. date. (enemies to lovers bucky x avenger!reader) 

↬ Pansies, Pain, and Other Things about Bucky: 🔪🧸💛

You and Bucky are begrudgingly paired on a mission together. This is less than ideal considering neither of you are too keen on the other tagging along. All goes as normal until a surprise attack severely hurts both of you. Feeling incredibly guilty, Bucky helps you tend to your wounds. He has trouble admitting it, but he wants to make sure you’re safe. (enemies to lovers bucky x avenger!reader) 

↬ Sex and Sage Flowers (Stand alone/Part 2 to Painseis, Pain, and Other Things about Bucky):  🧸

You and Bucky have been going steady for roughly four months now. After he returns home from a mission, you two decide to have a well-deserved night of fun. This encounter sets off your powers, causing you to accidentally cover the entire Compound in flowers. While you are embarrassed that you let your feelings get the best of your powers, Bucky can’t contain his smitteness at making you lose control. (bucky x avenger!reader) 

↬ Jealousy and James Buchanan Barnes:  🔪💔🧸

You and Bucky had had an ugly breakup months ago. He mistakenly thought he had moved past his feelings for you, until he saw you hanging out with another guy at one of Tony’s parties. He appears to be having some difficulty containing his jealousy, to say the least. (jealous!bucky x avenger!reader) 

↬ The Right Partner:  🔪💔🧸💛

 You and Bucky have always possessed a complicated history, and even more strained relationship with one another. Begrudgingly, you’re sent out on a mission with Barnes where you two are posing as a newly wed couple. In an effort to investigate the consistent disappearance of young women in a certain neighborhood, you find yourselves forced to confront a whirlwind of emotions. (faked married au bucky x avenger!reader)

↬ One Bed, Two Buddies:  🧸

You’re out on a mission with Bucky and Sam. Everything operates as usual until the room you’re sharing with Bucky only has one bed for the two of you. You try not to make a big deal of it, but that’s a little difficult when you both have some unresolved feelings for the other. (friends to lovers bucky x avenger!reader) 

↬ Grilled Cheese and Other Love Languages:  🧸💛

 Bucky has recently begun residing in the Compound. While out on a mission, as a favor to your friend Steve you promise to watch over his slowly recuperating friend while he adjusts to life out of Wakanda. While shy and resigned, he takes an interest in the pretty girl who checks on him. (bucky barnes x avenger!reader )

↬ Staying In:  🧸

On a rainy day, Bucky is more than content to spend it cuddling with his girl. (bucky barnes x reader drabble). 

↬ And Then There Were None:  💔

It had been two months since Bucky and you broke off things. In a moment of heartache and weakness, he couldn’t help but call you just to hear your voice again. You spend the night trying to patch up what happened between you two. (bucky barnes x female!reader) 

↬ The Devil's In the Details:  🔪💔

You and Bucky didn’t always give into the other’s twisted little games. You didn’t always hate each other. You didn’t always quip back and forth, the other waiting to see who would break first. Now, there you were, accompanying Bucky on a mission to a ballroom of all places. Despite your tense history, Bucky can’t help but assume a protective role around you, guarding you like a crown jewel as you complete the task at hand. But who’s to say he plans on keeping his hands off of you? (bucky!barnes x enhanced!reader) 

↬ Boys Don't Cry:  💔🧸

 Bucky keeps all his emotions buried deep within because that’s what he believes he’s supposed to do. One night after he’s attacked, he goes to you searching for some sense of comfort. After a loving conversation, Bucky learns to let it all out. (hurt!bucky x comfort!reader) 

↬ Smile Again:  🧸

Having recently moved down to Louisiana, Bucky struggled a bit in the relationship department. It’s not until he met a firecracker of a girl one night that he sees change and trusting yourself can be quit rewarding. (domestic!bucky barnes x female!reader) 

↬ Strawberry Lips:  🧸

 Bucky sees you applying lipstick one day and becomes completely enamored with the concept. (domestic!bucky x gn!reader) 

↬ When It All Falls Apart:  💔💛

The fate of the universe was in your hands. Bucky and you had been sent to retrieve the soul stone, a seemingly simple task. Unbeknownst to you, there was a hefty price to pay for such an exchange. You’re able to return to Earth, but it’s soon apparent part of you was left in Vormir. (bucky barnes x avenger!reader) 

↬ My Girl:  🧸💛

Bucky’s always been a bit of an active sleeper, twisting, turning, and talking as he rests. Occasionally, he has a habit of becoming sentimental when in his dreams. (domestic!bucky x female!reader) 

↬ Bad Soup and Good Boyfriends:  🧸

You come down with a minor stomach bug and Bucky goes into protective™ boyfriend mode. (domestic!bucky barnes x gn!reader) 

↬ Small Bump:  🧸

Bucky has fought literal armies, survived multiple murder attempts, and still nothing worries him like his pregnant wife. (bucky barnes x pregnant!reader) 

↬ Tiny:  🧸

Bucky is an absolute sucker for his girlfriend. (beefy!bucky x short!reader)

↬ Skinny Dipping:  🧸

To battle the intense summer heat, Bucky takes you to the local lake. What he fails to mention is that you two will be enjoying the day in the nude. (soft!bucky barnes x gn!reader)

↬ Snow Days 🧸

Upon realizing Bucky has never had a proper winter fun day, you take it upon yourself to show him the perfect night. (bucky barnes x gn!reader)

Love me Or Leave Me 💔

In an attempt to keep you safe, Bucky tries to put further and further distance between you to. His plan goes accordingly until you two break out in an argument. (bucky barnes x gn!reader)

Control 💔

John Walker makes the dire mistake of messing with Bucky’s girl. This misstep causes a major fight to break out between the two, ending in nothing but blood and rage. (bucky barnes x avenger!reader)

Beautiful Boy 💔🧸💛

Summary: You never pictured a lifetime where Bucky wasn’t there. Suddenly, a war breaks loose and it appears you two would be torn apart by space and eventually time. But James Buchanan Barnes always keeps his promises; he will always find his way home to you. (40s!bucky x artists!reader)

B.B. Boy 🧸

Summary: Bucky and you have been friends ever since he arrived that rainy at the Compound. Silently pining, you’d hope he would pick on the numerous hints you dropped. It’s not until a small miscommunication happens that he confronts his feelings for you. (avenger!reader x bucky barnes)

Dance With Me 💔🧸

Summary: After a bandage session with the lovable but stubborn Bucky Barnes, you decide to end the night with a dance. (female!reader x bucky barnes)

The Cure💔

Summary: You have an unrequited crush on Bucky that leads to a lot of tension in your friendship.

Headcanons

↬ bucky’s hair

↬ morning bucky

↬ uncle / dad bucky

↬ calling bucky james

↬ bucky seeing other guys hit on you

↬ domestic dad!bucky

↬bucky meets your ex boyfriend

↬bucky shows you his artwork

[lizacstuff]

Hi! What did you think of ep23?I love your in depth thoughts on the episodes. I really enjoyed it, especially the EdSer moments (was smiling like an idiot during the skating scene - when Eda complained about it being hot (girl same), and also that she understood what he said in French omg). I hope the grandmother doesn't turn out to be as evil as everyone is assuming. I guess the one big con was Ayfer. She's gotten more annoying right? That's not just me? But I love me some Aydan!

Hello! Thank you for the kind words. Let's see, I did like the episode, but as I said in another ask I was a bit on edge while watching for a couple of reasons, but they're all Edser related so I'll talk about that when I talk about them at the end. As far as Ayfer is concerned, I FEEL YOU. 

Good grief, woman. Why does she have to be such a harpy? It feels like she complains about absolutely everything. Plus, she's forcing a situation where her beloved niece can't trust or confide in her, and all the girls have to hide Eda's work schedule from her. Look, if Ayfer doesn't want to spend time with Aydan, fine, but her anger towards and disapproval of Eda's job and her relationship with Serkan are completely selfish. She may tell herself she's disapproving for Eda's own good, but come on.

Because, seriously, what does Ayfer think she's protecting Eda from? Serkan is handsome, rich, successful and head over heels in love with Eda. Let's be honest, Eda could do worse. He might be a tad arrogant and controlling, but he's a very good man with a very good heart. Also he tries with Ayfer. I get the connection with Alptekin is upsetting, but Serkan and Aydan have cut him completely out of their lives and neither had anything to do with what happened. I also get that Ayfer was put off by the whole contract thing, but it took two to tango there, and Eda's entire world opened up because of that arrangement.

Maybe that's the problem? 

(more under the cut)

Maybe Ayfer can feel Eda expanding and growing and her world getting much bigger than Ayfer's and it scares her? She thinks she'll lose her, or won't recognize her? Privately, Serkan and Eda have talked about running away together, maybe Ayfer senses that's a possibility? (PRO TIP: Then don't be a negative force they have to get away from!) 

Also what's happening with this Chef Alexander thing? Is he actually going to make an appearance? Is there going to be a romance? I think that would be good, maybe that will salvage Ayfer's character and she'll get distracted and maybe even happy. I did laugh, though, at her her calling Aydan and Seyfi out on their lie about having him on board with their charity scheme. They should know better than to try that. Amateur move, kids!  But I will always applaud their matchmaking efforts when it comes to Eda and Serkan. 

I enjoyed the girls this episode. I like that they don't share Ayfer's concerns about Serkan and are ready to go to the mat for whatever Eda wants. Poor Melo is the worst detective, but she gets points for trying. Also points for picking up what Eda was putting down and skillfully sweeping Balca and her broken heel out of the way. I'd want Fifi for protection as well, girl is badass. I can't tell what this Fifi/Erdem thing is supposed to be.  Does she have a soft spot for him, she must because I don't know why she would give him the time of day otherwise. She's not one we have to worry about not being able to say no. If she wanted to rid herself of his presence, she'd do it. Ceren and Ferit are just kind of... there. I don't dislike it, but I also don't really care. They need something to spice that up.

Which is what we finally got with Engin and Piril! Holy moly, who is her dad!?! Mafia boss? Politician? Wealthy recluse? @alicekepley suggested on another post that maybe it's Aydan's first love. Now that would be interesting. Maybe he turned to a life of crime after being disappointed by Aydan? I am now looking forward to see how this plays out and how it affects them. However, there's one thing that gets me almost every episode. I love Engin and Anil, but he looks at least a decade older than Serkan, Piril, and Selin. So much so that I don't buy they could have gone to school together. This is where I'll have to call on my well honed suspension of disbelief I guess... I'll tell myself he spent a lot of time in the sun and is graying a bit prematurely. 

I did like Engin and Serkan sitting around commiserating about their relationships and hoping things were about to turn around. That's the more equal buddy talk I want to know happens. 

Speaking of Serkan, duuuuuuuuude. You're being hunted, wise up!  I'm really stuck on what he said to Sirius after Eda left his house at the top of the episode. "Don't look at me like that, everything is under control, I know perfectly well what I'm doing, this is my tactic." We know from last episode he thought Eda would show, and this episode while talking to Eda he told her that he was expecting her and the candles were for her.  So... did he purposely allow Balca in to provoke Eda's jealousy? If so, I'm not sure this is his best course of action. It's certainly not with regards to fanning Balca's dangerous pretensions, but I'm not sure he's getting his best result with Eda either. It's true that it gave him an excuse to flirt, make the bet, tease her, bask in her obvious jealousy even if she won't admit it, and get a Parisian date out of it. I suppose that's not a bad day's work. On the other hand, if he'd sent Balca on her way, he would have had a happy Eda, in his house, sitting on the couch next to him, watching a movie with him, which also could have led to a very good place for him.  

It's also a mystery to me if Serkan is really clueless about Balca's intentions, or if he's playing dumb to suit his own purposes with Eda. I'm thinking it's the middle. He probably sees it but thinks it's a whole lot more harmless than it is. Like maybe he gets Balca has a crush on him, but he has no suspicion that he's in dangerous fatal attraction territory. Which is where we are. I don't want to fling words like 'crazy' around, but... bitch be crazy! If she is capable of trying to large-scale sabotage his company in her pursuit of him, that's some seriously scary stuff. WAKE UP, SERKAN. 

I said I was uneasy while watching this episode and part of it was concern over what would happen with the tender, and worrying if Balca's sabotage was going to work, leaving Eda to blame. If that had gone the other way, the fallout would have been painful. Also storylines where a fav is falsely accused always make me antsy. I was able to handle the Serkan roof collapse one because it was at the end of the episode, and they were able to figure out that he wasn't responsible right off the top of the next. But this one had me on edge all ep.  I was especially nervous after Eda made the independent report on her recommended firm part of a trust test. Sweetie, I love you, but NOOOOO. That was not the move of a professional. Serkan, as the company principle, wanting to vet a partner or vendor is completely normal and has nothing to do with how much he trusts her. Put aside the fact that she's only been in the workforce for a few months, you always want a second set of eyes on something that important. Always. She showed some of her immaturity there, which is fine, she's young and inexperienced, but it's a sign of how desperate Serkan is for her to forgive him that he humored her. That man will do anything for her, even if it doesn't make sense or is potentially damaging. I get why the writer's did it, for the suspense of Eda being out on that limb all on her own, but it was also actually a bit of a missed opportunity for him to mentor her there. (And I love when she learns from him.)

The other reason I was uneasy watching this ep was due to some frustration with Eda. See above on the trust test, but it was also a little hard to watch her just completely succumb to Serkan's charm and be in the moment with him one moment, and then the next second shake it off and be adamant that she was going to be leaving the job and him shortly.  It felt like constant whiplash. Also if she won the bet she wanted him to leave her alone? Sure, Jan. She could have asked for something really good! We all know she doesn’t really want him to leave her alone, so that pretense has gotten harder and harder to take. However, the times she rebuffed him didn't bother me as much as when she told Melo she was leaving the job. I can chalk up the ones to Serkan as part of her act, trying to protect herself and poke holes in his pretensions, but when she said it to Melo it felt more real. Like that was really what she was still planning to do, and it's really hard to reconcile that with all the moments where she puts down her guard and it's obvious she's madly in love with him.  

On a positive note, scenes where it’s clear they’re madly in love with each other were plentiful this episode. The romantic robot used every opportunity he could find to make her melt. My GAWD she has a will of iron that she was able to back away from him after he recited all the ways he could tell if a woman (her) was in love with him. He is one smooth bastard. And boy does he know her, he knows exactly what he does to her. That scene was FIRE. Not to be crass, but how did they not do it right then and there? After the last few eps, they have to be at a 100 on a scale of 1-10 when it comes to pent up sexual energy. Hey Eda, maybe you wouldn't be so jealous if you knew he had an outlet for that. I'm just sayin'.

The lunch was pretty funny and I definitely enjoyed the kicking and the under the table conversation. After refusing to admit she was jealous, Eda totally deserved that Serkan said that whatever Balca's feelings for him were, they were between him and Balca. Eeesh. I see what he's doing, he's trying to bring her feelings out into the open, and she deserves it, but I don't think he realizes how vulnerable she is over everything. He's walking a tightrope here. However, I do appreciate that he finally just admitted that he's jealous. If he'd just done that in 18, he would have saved himself some angst. Are we to infer from Serkan asking Eda not to use emojis with Efe, that Edser likes to use emojis when they text? Or was that just a generic, "don't be cute with him?"  I think I'll take that Serkan and Eda use emojis, just because it tickles me to think of Serkan Bolat doing that. All of shipper twitter thinks that's the writers poking at the actors because of how much they use them with one another on social. Who knows, maybe that explains it, since it sort of came out of the blue. You gotta love, though, that every manipulative thing Balca did either failed or backfired spectacularly. Showing up at his place, sure she succeeded in upsetting Eda and derailing their night, but it also put Eda on her guard and brought about the flirty wager between Eda and Serkan. She left the earring, but Eda found it before she could use it as an excuse to return. She broke her heel, but that just gave her a ruined pair of shoes and Melo an excuse to get her out of there so Serkan and Eda could be alone. She and her devious friend succeeded in throwing Melo and Eda off the scent, however all that meant was that Serkan won the bet and gave him the pretense needed to get her to agree to the most romantic date on the planet. She sabotaged the report, but Eda still found out about the company's background and Eda was the hero when ArtLife won the tender. Balca: 0 percent success rate so far. 

THE ICE SKATING SCENES WERE PURE MAGIC!  It was fun to see the whole cast out there having a blast, but obviously it was the Edser scene at night that lit up the whole show. Damn was that pretty. (it's currently my ipad lock screen and home screen) The chemistry between the actors was on display all episode, but here it just exploded. When Eda said she was hot, no kidding! How could you not be? And I agree that Serkan speaking French to her was OMG. Love, love, love the date that Serkan planned for them in Paris. I'm bereft that we'll likely never see it. Damn you pandemic, look what you've taken from us! The characters, and the audience, deserve an entire episode of Paris romantic fluff. We've all earned this! 

The date sounded perfect and I found it very interesting that he had purposely never been to Montmartre. So at some point he promised himself he'd only go there with a woman he was truly in love with, makes me wonder if it was a much younger Serkan who made that promise. The Serkan we met in the pilot didn't believe in love, he was hard-hearted, he actually talked with Engin about how a contract, a bloodless business transaction, was the way to go for relationships. Robot Bolat. So I don't think he made that idealistic promise any time recently. If so, that means he's had that in the back of his mind for years, but Eda's the only woman he's ever considered taking. My heart. I love how the show keeps showing us and telling us that this is the first time Serkan has ever been in love. You could see in that scene that Eda was right there with him. She was so happy and in the moment and swept away by the romance. She was as excited for Paris as he was. I know we all wanted a kiss/declaration here, it would have been a very good moment for it. A very good one. But the show has other plans for them, so we wait.

So, yeah, I really liked the Edser we got, but Eda’s hot and cold act was hard to reconcile at times. However, perhaps it all came together in the end, when she's talking to Melo and Ceren about Paris. She was feeling troubled over it, probably what agreeing to go with him meant, but they both told her to listen to her heart in Paris and it seems like she was going to do it: "From now on I'll stop worrying. I'm opening a new page in life." So I think in that moment she was ready for next steps and was planning to be open with him in Paris, let's hope it carries over to the next episode even without Paris. 

Actually, that whole conversation was a bit of a window into her psyche and was more illuminating than almost anything in the episode in that regard. When Eda says she’s worried, Melo teases her that she's nervous to be alone with Serkan Bolat, and then jokes that all young women would like to have that problem, including herself.  Eda does NOT like that joke and actually verbalizes it, "Melo, at least you don't do that."  That was a huge spotlight into Eda's insecurities, like she is really discombobulated by witnessing women showing interest in him while they're in such a nebulous place. Since she is coming off of what happened with Selin, and was already feeling jealous when the first candidate set her off with (her creepy) talk of chemistry last episode, then finding Balca at Serkan's house in the opening scene, I suppose it's no surprise that all of that has had some residual effects. But that it's to the point where she can't take a joke from Melo is telling. Poor thing.  

My hope is that this is just something she's working through while she's feeling off-kilter about everything. It would be one thing if they were together, but she's in this headspace where half the time she says she's leaving and it's over between them and half the time she acting like his wife, so I think she's just discombobulated. Maybe she just wants time to figure things out, but feels like she doesn’t have it, because someone is going to swoop in and take her place and that’s feeding her jealousy? The fact that Serkan can’t see it (Selin and Balca) until it’s out of control doesn’t help. 

It's natural for her to be upset that this woman has entered the scene and is clearly trying to maneuver herself into Eda's place in Serkan's life. However, there is an easy fix to this. Just go be with him. Come on, Eda, we know you can do it! You're ready. You’re primed. Bring on the New Year's Ep!

[crossbows-and-moonshine]

Guys I did it! *Sobs violently*

Alright, here’s my list of recommended fics you super awesome humans. 

As I said in my other post, writers helping writers is awesome so I’m so happy to tell you some of the fics I’ve read that I love. Go show these amazing people some love for the time and effort they have put in to create wonderful fics. Any fics I mention have been read by me (multiple times with some), and I totally recommend them. 

I’m gonna do this in a few ways, first off, I’ll section Archive of Our Own separately to FanFic.net, just to make it easier for me to grab the links. Ao3 has a nifty little thing where you can see your reading history so I can grab them from there, with FF, I need to go through and find them, pray for me lololol.

I’ll also be separating the Boondock Saints ones and Daryl ones, just for your ease, if you're only interested in one and not the other. The Daryl ones are only on Archive, because I haven't really read any over on FF for some reason, don't ask me why, I just haven't.

They’re not in any particular order, just as I see them, I'll grab them.

These aren’t all the fics I’ve read, some of the ones I love have been deleted by the writer, which breaks my heart honestly, and some of them I just can't remember.

It’s so fucking long guys, brace yourselves, I’ll put it under the cut.

So, here we go!

Archive of Our Own [Boondock Saints]

- One of Three 

I really like this one and you guys should really check it out.

Author Summary; She had cocooned herself, letting routine and safety run her life. After everything she knew it wasn't much of one, and because she decided to do the right thing her life's about to hit a tailspin in some of the worst and most fantastic ways.

This is a Murphy/OC/Connor story and it’s amazing.

Chapters; 18

- Boondock Saints OC Arc

This ones a little different because it's not set out like the usual fic. Its an arc and some bits have one chapter, one of arcs even has 36. They all follow the same storyline and it flows like a normal fic, the author has just chosen to post it this way, and it works.

Author summary; The story of one girl's first up close and personal encounter with one of the brothers on a late-night subway.The 1st story in my Boondock Saints OC story arc.

This is a Murphy/OC/Connor fic, and it's one of my favs honestly, I've read it all numerous times.

Chapters; I can't give you an exact number with the way it's set out, but as I said, one arc alone has 36, so there's plenty to sink your teeth into.

- Everybody Knows

I love this one, it's short and sweet.

Author summary; Everybody knows exactly what Marissa needs to do to get over her recent breakup. She's spent the last month in mourning and her friends are ready for her to move on...

Murphy/OC/Connor.

Chapters; 4, but there's also a sequel which is 5 chapters long, I won't post the link for that since when you've read this one, the option to click on to the next part is at the bottom.

- Saints Alive

I looooove this one!

Author summary; Skid is once again on her own and she has to find a new place. Luckily for her, she knows a friend who knows a guy who knows of a place for free. Downside is it's in the South side of Boston where crime is rather terrible. Of course, with two Irish brothers as new next door neighbors, what's the worst that could happen? 

Murphy/OC/Connor

Chapters; 7

- Time Zero Blues

Okay, so this one, omfgjwoehdjshndloihd. This is one of my favvvvvs of all time, I’ve read it so many times, if you don't read it, I just might cry.

Author summary; Murphy and Connor get out of work early and are headed to McGinty's. Murphy finds a trail of Polaroids along the way that lead them to an unexpected situation. 

Murphy/OC/Connor

Chapters; 23

- Sacrament of Penance

If you’re after something to get you hot and bothered, this is it :’)

Author summary; "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." (1 John 1:9) Pure PWP, sacrilege, and gratuitous smut.

Murphy/OC/Connor

Chapters; 5

- Robyn Hood

This one is mine! Lololol. I’m not recommending it because I’m saying its good, but I haven't posted it here because honestly I’m lazy, so if you wanna read another one of my multi-chapter fics, then hop on over :)

Author summary; When Robyn gets thrown into the life of The Saints, it causes a big stir between the brothers. The boys deal with their feelings for her in very different ways, and all of their lives get turned upside down. Connor/OC/Murphy.

Slightly AU, set a year after the first film, they don't go back to Ireland.

Murphy/OC/Connor

Chapters; 15

- Choíche Is go deo

Another one of mine I’m pretty sure I’ve never posted here.

Author summary; Follow Niamh Flannagan as she grows up with the twins in Ireland and watches them turn from boys into men. How will they both deal with having feelings for her? Will jealousy get in the way? 

Murphy/OC/Connor.

Chapters; 8

Fanfic.net [Boondock Saints]

- Risk it all

I’m in love with this one, it’s really fucking good.

Author summary; Nolee moved to South Boston with a hope to escape her past and make a better life for herself. What she didn't plan on was the peculiar Murphy MacManus coming into picture and breaking down everything she thought she knew. As they attempt to bond, can she overcome her tainted old life and let down her walls? Especially with one extra problem: she's already pregnant.

Murphy/ OC

Chapters; 22

- Warrior Shepherds

Another one of my all time favs. I love the dynamics of the characters and how well the boys are written. There’s some serious humour thrown into the mix and I laughed out loud so many times when I read this one. You’ll also be pleased to know this author is on Tumblr, @risingphoenix761. If the username looks familiar, it's because I tag her in all of my shit and recently wrote her a BDS drabble for her birthday. She's an awesome human, so check her out :D

Author note; They were called to destroy evil, but crossing paths with a wayward soul meant compromise. And in compromising, the MacManus brothers get more than they bargained for. Connor/OC/Murphy (rated M for violence, language, and sexual content)

Murphy/OC/Connor

Chapters; 37

- Amaryllis

Also by @risingphoenix761, and equally good and worth a read.

Author summary; She wasn't necessarily in their plans. They definitely weren't in hers. Yet between fate, coincidence, a few misadventures and some small favors, plans don't count for much anyway. Now the only question is, are they really just friends?

Murphy/OC/Connor

Chapters; 6

- Two Lads and A Lass

I love this one!

Author summary; This is a story about my OFC, Timi, who meets the MacManus brothers a year and a half before they become the Saints of Boston. Follow their adventures as Murphy and Connor try to pull the shyness out of Timi and teach her what love and fun truly is.

Murphy/OC/Connor

Chapters; 27

- Her Defenses

Yet another high on my list, I love everything about this story.

Author summary; "What do you two see in me that makes you want to try and fix me?" A new life in Boston meant giving up everything she had back home. That never meant that she had to give up her defenses at the same time. Rated M for language and (future) adult situations.

Murphy/OC/Connor

Chapters; 40

- A Saint, A Sinner

Now this one right here, I have probably read so many times I know it word for word, I’m not even kidding. This is very high on my list. The boys are written perfectly, I love every fucking thing about this one, and there's some very interesting hot and heavy shit along the way.  If you only read one fic of this list, it needs to be this one.

Author summary; Connor M./OC/Murphy M. BDS prequel/romance. What happens when you drink whisky with the boys? It's got it all: romance (as far as the boys can DO romance), fluff, hurt/comfort, plot, canon plus research. Rated for MacManus mouth, violence, & explicit three-way smut (no twincest). Note: The BDS belong solely to T. Duff

Murphy/OC/Connor

Chapters; Now it says 87, but the author has been reworking this fic so it's actually about 67 I think? I’m unsure, and the chapters are a little shorter than usual fics. It’s still amazing and a lot for you to immerse yourself in.

- Saints Angel

Another good one you need to check out.

Author summary; The Saints help to protect everyone in their city, but what if they had a protector of their own? In comes a woman, a hurt, young, lovely woman that was rescued by them, given a new life. To her, they are her boys and she will now do anything to protect them. She will become their Angel...forever to walk by their side...forever to watch over them. 

Murphy/OC/Connor

Chapters; 21

- Once More, With Feeling

This one is perfect quite honestly, I fucking love the OC so much and everything about this fic.

Author summary; [HIATUS - UNDER REVISIONS][ConnorxOCxMurphy] Avery, an emotionally independent journalist becomes complicated by her simultaneous feelings for both of the twins. As their secret life of vigilante world unfolds, Avery is left unattended to an entitled, delusional psychopath.

Murphy/OC/Connor

Chapters; 9

- Alexis's Saints

Another one I absolutely love.

Author summary; Alexis just recently moved to South Boston with her mother. When a nightmare from her past returns full force, she runs into the MacManus brother's and despite trying to stay away from them, she finds herself growing attached to the two brothers as the three try to figure each other out. Rated M for language and some adult themes. Please Enjoy

Murphy/OC/Connor

Chapters; 13

- The Possessed 

This one is fucking amazing. It’s so different from any other BDS fic I’ve read and well worth the read. There's also a sequel which is Connor/OC, so if you wanna read that, click on their username after reading this one and give that one a read too.

Author summary; She is possessed by something evil and supernatural. They have been asked to help save her, to call upon their faith, but one of them is struggling to believe in anything anymore. If she can't be saved then they will be forced to kill her. Do they have the strength to do what they must? Can he believe in something again? 

Murphy/OC

Chapters; 19

- The Librarian

I love the humour in this one and just everything about it.

Author summary; "You're murderers." Rhetta held up a hand, "And please don't give me a speech about how you only killed 'evil' men. I've heard it all before. And while I do agree that the men you killed deserved it, I do not believe that you have the right to take the law into your own hands." "So, you're no' a fan?"

Murphy/OC/Connor

Chapters; 17

OKAY, I’m gonna leave it at that for the BDS ones, I know there's more but you have no idea how long that just took me, omg lolololol.

Archive of Our Own [Daryl]

- His Walls

This one is so fucking good, it’s number two on my list of Daryl fics. I love how it starts off with young Daryl, they write him so well and exactly how I imagine him to be. It’s soooooo good guys, read it

Author summary; People build up walls, not to keep others out, but to see who cares enough to break them down. Truer words have never been spoken where Daryl Dixon was concerned. He never expected anyone to care enough, until someone did.

Starts out AU with 20 yr old Daryl, from Chapter 22 on out we'll be in the ZA-world.

M-rating for smut, language, adult topics, descriptions of abuse & attempted rape.

Chapters; 51

- Gorgeous

I hadn't actually read this one before, but I came across it when searching for ones I had read, and I fucking loved it. Young Daryl is my jam and this was so well written and just a good read. It’s a young Daryl AU, so the rest of the twd characters are in it too, like Rick his best friend, Maggie the readers best friend etc. 

Author summary; After meeting Daryl on the way home from a party the reader hatches a plan to get him to like her. But if it isn't friends and well-meaning King County citizens that tell her to stay away from him than it's Daryl himself, who's trying to keep his own feelings from coming to the surface.

Chapters; 16

- 357 Daryl Jerkin' It Drive

This one is a little different, this is a collection of works by the writer where they write not only about Daryl, but a lot of different characters Norman has played. As you can tell by the title, they’re all smut based, and well worth the read. It's also worth mentioning that the writer also has a tonne of other Daryl stories so make sure to head onto their profile to check everything else out, it would take too long to link them all here. Most of them are AU Daryl which I love and they're a really talented writer.

Author summary; none.

Chapters; it's hard to say since its a collection, most are one-shots but I know at least two of the works in there are nine chapters each.

- Night Stalker

Okay I lied, this is the same author as above and the next one is too because it's a sequel to this, but they're my favs by this author, I love them. They're a little dark and they're AU, but if you're like me, you'll love them. I recently recommended the sequel to this one to someone in my ask box.

Author summary; Daryl is mentally unstable, but functioning. He falls in love.

Chapters; 15

- Walking in the Light

The sequel to the above story, I’m in love with it, read it now!

Author summary; Sequel to "Night Stalker". Daryl is improving under the care of his new nurse, Krissy. He is still confused by the hallucination, and why Krissy reminds him so much of Kristin.

Chapters; 17

- Just Another Day

Another AU Daryl story that is amazing.

Author summary; Redemption. It's a concept Daryl Dixon is completely unfamiliar with- but desperately needs. It lives in his dreams, where he's a hero among men in the zombie apocalypse... but that's not real life. Real life is sorrow, loneliness, and pain. Until he meets his beautiful neighbor- then its possibility, hope, and maybe a bullet to the brain.

Chapters; 15

- In The Little Town of Jasper…

Yet another amazing AU Daryl story. Are you sensing a theme here? Looool. I’m pretty sure this is the same author as His Walls that I recommended, but I’m too lazy to check. 

Author summary; -Abrasive. Yes, that description fit him perfectly. The guy smelled like trouble, and she knew he would get even more abrasive the longer she talked to him. Too bad she didn't care. -A pretty stranger that talked to him, knew his name and his place of work? In Daryl's book, that just couldn't be good news. AU - Daryl Dixon/OC, Explicit for language and sexual situations. Yes smut!

Chapters; 65

- Second Hand Hearts

This is another fic I highly recommend you read. (Duh, or it wouldn't be on the list, God Sarah ur like so annoying) :’)

Author summary; In her darkest hour, a woman who has lost everything is rescued by a handsome man with a crossbow and nothing to lose-until he meets her. In a nightmarish new world, where the dead prey on the living, can they beat the odds and together make life worth living again?

Chapters; 32

- Transference

Another AU Daryl one, but it’s so fucking good and different to a lot I’ve read.

Author summary; Be warned. This is a story about Daryl seeking out a different and not so mainstream relationship. It is 100% consensual and he asks for it. He seeks out what he wants so if you have read the tags and you continue to read it's on you. Xoxoxox Krissy

Chapters; 14

- Hope is a Waking Dream

I know I keep saying I love the fics, but I do, clearly. This one though is another favourite of mine and you really need to read it. I love the dynamic between the OC and Daryl.

Author summary; Set between Seasons 2 and 3. Melissa Sheppard is alone in the ZA, but she was alone before the dead owned the earth. She prefers it that way. Boy, is she pissed when she gets back to her cabin to find it has been taken by strangers.

Chapters; 24

- Paths Crossed

I’m getting sick of hearing myself say I love it over and over, so just fucking read it and make me happy! *sobs*

Author summary; While out hunting Daryl comes across a stranger and decides to help her despite his better judgement and they begin on their journey together.

Chapters; 61

- Daryl Dixon Loves Me

This is another I hadn't actually read until now when I was searching, I actually really loved it. It's full of smut and that's never a bad thing. It took me a couple of chapters to really get into it, but it's really worth the read.

Author summary; Daryl comes across Lucy (OC) in the woods and claims her for his own. The story begins during the Farmhouse era of the series.

Chapters; 14

- A Star In A Sea Of Darkness; Darkness In A Sea Of Stars

Another one, just read it.

Author summary; After the Governor attacked the prison, the only person left in Daryl's shitstorm of a life was Judith. For Daryl, it's enough. Until he met her.

Chapters; 28

- Roommate

Holy shit, this fic is everything. It's AU pre-ZA and it's just the best. It's so good, I can't even put into words, very high on my list and it also has a sequel set in the ZA that’s 13 chapters long, please read it. If you like AU things, this is for you. The way they write Daryl in this, it's just gold. It’s also told in Daryl's POV which is just amazing.

Author summary; Several bodies are found in the area of a small town. In this town lives Daryl, the killer of all those people. The investigation goes on, the profile is made, and now the police and the FBI look for a specific type, a loner type, ... Daryl's type. He decides to find himself a roommate in an attempt to mislead the police. Let's see how that will turn out for him. AU pre-apocalypse horror story. Obviously very OOC Daryl.

Rated M for a good reason, violence, foul language, adult content... it's all there, consider yourself warned.

Chapters; 12

- Wallflower

Okay, so this ones a little different. It's actually a Daryl/OC/Rick love triangle and I usually don't read Rick fics (loool that rhyme though) but this is a good fic.

Author summary; Thea Graham has lived in Alexandria for over a year and is happy being mostly invisible. This is what happens when she suddenly has the attention of two men.

Chapters; 20

- Running Wild

This story is number one on my list guys, this is right up there with His Walls. This is my number one fav Daryl fic of all time and I’ve read it so many fucking times it's unreal. This fic is life, it’s everything. If I could only read one fic over and over for the rest of my life, it would be this one.

Author summary; Four years have passed since their sanctuary at the prison fell at the hands of the Governor and the surviving members are now thriving at their new home just north of Atlanta. Out of the blue, late one afternoon, Daryl Dixon stumbles across someone they thought they'd lost long ago; a member of the Woodbury community that had returned with Rick to the prison.

Warning: This fic is quite a bit darker than my other ones. If you are looking for fluffy bunny, happy prancing unicorns and rainbow colored endings, this is not the story you are looking for.

Chapters; 67

- Amnesia

I love this fucking story, ‘nough said.

Author summary; Her story isn't all that different from anyone else these days. The world went to shit, and the dead don't want to die. She's lost people. So has everyone else. Who she was before isn't who she is now. But there is one difference between Lena and every other survivor she's come across. She doesn't know who she was. And who she is? Well, she's still trying to figure that out.

During the mayhem of the early days of the apocalypse, a fateful smack on the head stole her memory. All she's ever known is the world she's living in now. But that doesn't mean she's adept at surviving it. Eventually, she ends up alone and near death's door. Till a man on a motorcycle chooses to save her life.

Now she has to decide if who she was is worth finding, or if she'll fight the hell that comes with what's forgotten and strive for something better with the one man in the world who can see past it all.

Chapters; 48

- Cherokee Rose

Yet another amazing fic!

Author summary; Daryl and Raven's world collide after a visit to Hilltop by the group from Alexandria. Raven's only love is her Black Stallion Obsidian and Daryl has been done with loving anything for a long time. He's had a lot of practice hardening his heart but the dark vixen is finding cracks in his armor. Will Raven be the one that will finally make Daryl feel again? Rated for sexual situations.

Chapters; 21

- Lips of an Angel

I fucking love this fic. This author has already made it on this list because she's so fucking good. Just go read all of her shit. Its AU Daryl, which by now you guys should probably be able to tell I love looool.

Author summary; Daryl calls a phone sex line. I know this is a trope that has been done before but I feel like I added my own spin on it. I hope you enjoy. I love Hinder, and I heard this song on the radio, so here we are.

Chapters; 11

- The Country Singer

Amazing story, go forth and read my children…

Author summary; Country Music rising star, Melanie McCall and her songwriting partner are headed to D.C. to find hope after their tour bus breaks down and their band is wiped out. They are given a chance to come to Alexandria...but what will happen once their new neighbors find out she was Beth Greene's favorite singer?

A story about losing voice, but finding hope.

Chapters; 18

- Home at last (Redux)

Yet another good one for you guys to read. 

Author summary; There are two people alive in this world for whom childhood was a dangerous, precarious, frightening place. For whom life has never been easy and relationships always strained and unnatural things. Having connected, against the odds and then been torn apart by civilization falling around them. How will they react when they meet each other again.

One of them has survived on a deep well of anger and pain, found a family, of sorts, and begun to try and put his past behind him and learn to let people in. The other has dropped the pretense she'd built up before the world went to shit and now she is as detached and self-reliant as he used to be. What happens when these two meet? Can two misshapes fit together and face the world as a better, stronger, complete whole? Can they find, in each other, a place to call home at last?

Chapters; 84

- Of Myths and Men

I fucking love this one, please read it.

Author summary; This story will follow an Original Female Character and her dog through to TWD world from the beginning of the turn.

She will meet the rest of the group, around mid season four.

There is no Beth in my story, Beth fans. I'm sorry.

Artemis. Greek Goddess of the hunt, wild animals, wilderness, childbirth and virginity. Though many Gods vied for her affections only her hunting companion, Orion, could win her heart.

She'd heard them all, been asked if she was a virgin, asked if she had a twin brother, Apollo, asked if she was raped and attacked by her friends and family, asked if she had killed anyone... She was just a girl from a small town with a stupid name.

Artemis had never wanted an Orion, and now the world was falling apart she gathered the chances of meeting one were slim to none. Right? She has Diablo, her best friend and protector.

Who needed the Greek giant Orion when you had the Devil on your side anyway?

Chapters; 42

- Saving Valentine

OH MY GOD THIS STORY GUYS. I love this one, really fucking love it. High on my list. It's got a little bit of Negan/OC in there, but who doesn't love a bit of Negan? I certainly fucking do lololol It’s mainly Daryl/OC though, so even if Negan isn't your jam, I would really recommend reading this.

Author summary; She fought and killed to survive but she lived for revenge. Valentine waits for the right moment to kill the man who murdered her family. Can she do what needs to be done to escape the Sanctuary that is her prison? Can she accept the helping hand from strangers to do it? Can she live with all she lost? TWD world, non canon timeline.

Chapters; 51

- The Living and The Dead

Can we just talk about vampire Daryl for a second, because like HOLY FUCK WHY IS THIS THE ONLY VAMP DARYL FIC I HAVE EVER FOUND. *Breathing intensifies*

Anywho...this story, just fuck. It's everything, it gives me life, please read it omfg.

Author summary; Daryl is the last of his species, in a world that has just turned stranger and stranger since the day his brother turned him.

He's living as normal a life as you can on your own in the woods surrounded by Walkers... until Evie shows up, and threatens to bring all his instincts right back to the surface.

Chapters; 65

- Beasts and Monsters

If you're after a badass OC, this is the story for you. It's so good.

Author summary; Having lost her entire group, Lena finds herself alone in a crumbling world watched through darkened eyes. She is courageous, savage and uncomplicated. Her only companions being an obedient horse and two pet Walkers. When she finds herself outside a prison, inside the walls she finds a group of survivors capable of giving her a glimmer of hope.

Chapters; 31

- Stay

I really love this one *whines*

Author summary; Hannah has been alone for months, but somehow she's made it. But after discovering a school tucked into the northern hills of Georgia, she encounters a stranger who is just as damaged and broken as she is.

Chapters; 48

- Born Nameless

What's this? Yet another good story? Why yes, it is. 

Author summary; Anamika has been alone from the start of the apocalypse and she likes it that way. Groups meant vulnerability, which meant death and Anamika wanted to survive. However, circumstances change and when she agrees to give Alexandria a chance, she finds that she just might not have met the right sort of people before, in particular a dirty, gruff redneck with a hidden heart of gold.

Chapters; 35

Random bonus fic;

- I think I liked you better when you didn't have a knife in your hand, Peaches…

I thought I’d throw this one at you, why’s it a bonus fic you ask? Its a Negan fic, not Daryl, but what the fuck, have it anyway, its really fucking good loooool I fucking love Negan man, I’ve thought about writing him so many times :’)

Author summary; When Blake finds herself sold out to the Saviours by her abusive fiancé, she realises that she's certainly not on her own anymore and finds an unlikely friend in Negan. And Negan does NOT like men who beat their girlfriends, one tiny bit….

Chapters; 140

And that is it guys! Holy fudge nuts, can we just talk about how long this list took me to make? It’s 20 pages long guys *sobs* don’t say I never give you anything.

That nifty history thing on Ao3 I mentioned, for some reason, quite a few weren’t there and I had to go through the fics to find them. Not every single one is on the list, that would take me fucking forever to do, but these are the best ones I've read.

On that note, I want to just say something.

I’m an avid reader of fics, and as you know if you're here, a writer. So let me just take a quick minute to tell you how much writers appreciate feedback on their fics. 

We write for free, we gain no money from what we do, using our spare time and take painstaking hours to not only write fics, but edit, make them perfect and get them out to you. Every like/kudos, or comment/reblog, it means the fucking world to us.

I reply to every comment I get, every time someone likes my shit or comments, it makes my fucking day. Because it reassures me I’m doing good.

I have my days where I think I'm a shit writer and that no one would care if I gave up, and then someone will comment, even something simple like’ this was good’, and it fills me with so much fucking joy.

So, if you read a fic and like it, please let us know. Even if you just like/kudos the thing, just a click, it doesn't take any time, it means so much to us. If you really liked it, comment, let us know. Don't know what to say? 

‘Awesome’

‘Good job’

‘I loved this’

All of these are adequate, you don't need to over think what you say. If you liked one line in particular, tell us, it's everything. 

Of course you don’t have to, but it’s always welcome is what I’m trying to say.

So with that out of the way, I hope you enjoy the fruits of my labour with this list and I’ve given you a lot to read. My eyes feel like they’re falling out and I might die, but there we go, it’s done. :’)

Much love

Sarah x

[dxscxndxnts]

Ok I’m HERE for the Buma brotp I definitely feel like Uma would give Ben tips on how to be more assertive when people undermine him. Ben would help Uma get better at diplomacy when things are rocky between the AKs and the VKs. Uma, Ben, and Evie would work together to get ALL of the kids off the isle 👏🏻 Also I feel like Ben and Uma’s friendship would force Mal to at least try to make amends with Uma. Pleeease feel free to add more hc!!

YASS TO PARTNERS IN POLITICS ANON!

Uma is kinda like the current champion of the villain kids because they all looked up to Mal at first, but then she didn’t give them a second thought for sixth months (except for that one time she went back during Return, saw them, and then…did nothing?) Then Uma fights for their freedom by force, and something actually comes out of it, so Uma is the fav among most of the VKs when they come over.

Ben doesn’t immediately catch onto this. At first, he uses figureheads like Mal and Evie to try and inspire VKs into being good, but it’s not working how he planned. He goes to Uma, remembering how she’s a natural born leader who also cares about the Isle, and at first she’s adamant against helping Ben (because it would be like helping Mal), but Ben plays the “don’t do it for me then. do it for the other kids who deserve a better life.” and that gets Uma on board.

It’s hard at first, and Uma’s first order of business is having Ben kick Mal off the initiative. Ben says he can’t and that the vks love Mal, but Uma stops the every vks she sees on their way to his office and asks them their opinion of Mal. Words like “traitor” “poser” “hypocrite” and plenty more colorful words were among the responses. Ben concedes and gently let’s Mal off the vks initiative (only for the time being).

Uma looks at all of their plans and is a cross between pissed and amused. Putting high school aged vks in high school classes? She knows better than anyone that most of the vks are probably not up to par with Auradon’s curriculum (her best friends are Mr. Can’t Read and Mr. Can’t Count). They’d be setting them up to fail! She demands classes be opened up for villain kid remedial courses, and that they are given any resources necessary to succeed. Ben is instantly astonished by Uma solving such a big problem that he didn’t even notice. It makes the scheduling business harder, especially with finding teachers willing to teach vks, but Uma reminds him that no one said it would be easy, so he’s willing to put in the effort.

In their little working Trio, Evie’s the brains, Ben’s the spirit, and Uma’s the perspective. Under their watch, the VKs get along just fine. Evie helps tutor the kids and even offers to teach some of the younger kids basic skills as well as get other honors students like Doug and Jane and Carlos in on it. Ben does his cute little Ben thing and checks in on all the vks regularly to make sure they’re all doing great (he’s like the super happy principal that always gives kids high fives). If any teacher has a problem with a vk, he oversees the problem (with assistance from Uma of course). Uma is kinda like the reluctant parent of all the vks. She has so many responsibilities: reviewing disciplinary cases on vks, keeping an open door policy so vks can talk to her about their problems, approving all of Ben’s ideas for the vks, doing her own damn school work–yet she cares about them all and does it all anyway.

Of course, doing all of this while Mal and Uma hate each other is tricky. Mal is trying to convince Ben that Uma is evil and that she has been since they were kids, and Ben does something Mal never thought he’d do: ask Uma’s side of the story. He brings them both into his office and has them both state their side of the story with no interruptions. It goes from childhood drama to teen angst to the whole ‘Picked for Auradon’ situation, and it all eventually ends with a reluctant truce, and Ben just has to accept that as the best he’ll get for now.

I’m gonna dip into my hc that Uma and Audrey are bffs for a sec. In exchange for making her be nice to Mal, Uma makes Ben properly apologize to Audrey for dropping her (despite being spelled) and never going back and saying anything about it. Yay! Friendship rebuilt!

I should probably mention that Harry HATES how much attention Uma gives Ben now that they’re all buddy-buddy on the council. He’s always had that little bit of jealousy since Cotillion (even though Ben was spelled) and he just can’t stand Ben bc he’s a King, he’s successful, AND he’s now Uma’s “friend.” Harry starts doing dumb shit to get in trouble so Uma will have to see him more (she represents the villain kids, of course) and it just makes drama WHICH WE LOVE!

Okay that’s all I got for now :)

[01010010-posts]

abo anon. how would the omega bois tease their alpha? what would motivate them to do it? Jealousy? Boredom? Need?

my friend abo anon i’ve missed u sm,,,, how are u cutiemhh let’s see, for connor it’s totally all 3 of them. jealous? he’d tease the HECK out of his alpha, just to be fucked a lot, as to mix both their scents together and to get his ‘prize’ bc honestly?? he’s not afraid to cut a bitch it’s HIS alpha not someone else’s fuck. boredom? that’s the most unlikely to happen but it’s still on the list: he’d rub himself all over you and the nest, to make it clear that he hates not doing anything for a long period of time and maybe maybe as his alpha mhh you could help out a bit? need? yes!!! needy boy,,,, shy about it because perhaps now’s not the time but gosh you look so good and he really wants your hands on his body in this moment. he’d be subtle, lingering touches, a lightly distressed scent to catch your attention, minuscole unnecessary sensual movements60 is more the type of jealousy & need. i mean he’s always a teasing mess so boredom does not count,,,, but you? someone being too close? hinting something too much? he’d see red. he wouldn’t even tease too much at first probably, completely bothered by the fact that your jacket smells weird and he doesn’t like it AT ALL, because he’s full of insecurities so no wonder others might make you happier than what he’s able to. this stupid dork. he clams up (which is a thing that never happens so?? take the clue?? you idiot uncaring alpha) and his nervous scent (no matter how much he tries to hide it) is often present. confronts him about it and let him know that there’s no need to be so worried because you’re there for him and nobody can change that. you have a mark to prove it too! give him lots of cuddles and kisses and THEN he’ll get all cocky, teasing you to no end. need? absolutely. esp in heat; he still hates it a bit so teasing is a nice way to relieve the stress. esp if it means getting fucked sm.RK900 is ughh do i really need to spell it? he’s a ultra fucker teaser. he TEASES every time he has the chance. actually more as a game between you two than anything, in public he’d whisper you some phrases that leave few things up to imagination, the more you react the more fun it gets. ofc if you don’t like it just say so & he’ll stop immediately, apologizing. but if you whisper him hot words back? ghhuu he’ll melt and won’t be able to wait to go home!!! and yes at home? he teases ALOUD who cares everyone needs to hear how fucking much he loves you and how fucking much you love him,,,, which is a thing the neighbours know too well with his little yelps and moansomegas: ahh well connor praises tons of them, his fav is ‘perfect’ but talking about petnames good boy could still be a nice way to call him, not always tho or it’ll lose the power of making him shiver and feel all warm, otherwise, normal ones are ok! honey is so cute it totally gives off the dripping image of him panting, cheeks blue, at the mercy of pleasure, his alpha on top giving him kisses and murmuring sweet nothings. i guess saying his name over and over gets him into a kinda fuzzy ecstasy yes it’s his name, he’s his own person, that’s the name you repeat everyday and so it will be like this for a long time still, it relaxes him. what would he say? most of the time he’d be too busy moaning and focusing on letting both of you feel good so he prefers talking without any rush when two are spent from the effort, not actually doing anything if not hugging60 would love to get praises too but he’s not actually the type to ask, it would make the gesture meaningless he thinks (which is not the case aaaa) so if you know he’d be all preciously gasping for air, if not that’s a bummer :( but he wouldn’t mind you saying soft things either, be it something you want to say about him, about you, about your relationship or what you’re feeling rn. maybe you can say you’re going to bite him?? pLEASE? as for names,,,, gosh you have quite the choice. it can be something a bit out of a crappy & steamy romance novel but you can easily throw in some ‘slut’ or light things like that, nothing too extreme. but then again that’s the heat of the moment, otherwise some petnames that are implicit compliments like ‘pretty boy’ and so on are his favs. his name, if he decides to get one, he’d be p happy if you used that. what he would say? yep. he’d be rough & dirty but if you don’t appreciate it just tell him so not a prob. he can be a total sweetie if he wants.RK900 he wants you to,,,, simply be you. like, i know it sounds stupid but he’s cheesy. he wants you to openly express only what you want, if you want to praise him good, if you want to keep silent good too, if you want to kiss him for the whole time GOOD too!!, if you want to slur half words because he feels so good well VERY good too. petnames? the concept is quite cute, honestly, totally a human feature but he likes to try his best at them. his fav is baby because it’s the complete opposite of what he is, big, perfectly able to survive on his own, human (okay maybe the second thing’s not so true,,, let him believe it fam) but it’s,,,, so cute,,,, his alpha caring for him sm he’s weak. would say? he would moan a lot as connor does but he’s the superior model so he’d still be able to say things, not so coherent but it’s all about how you make him feel: fucking nice.alphas: connor uhh whatever sounds you do to let him know that you’re enjoying this as much as he is which is A LOT. since i’ve already said what petnames he’d like i’ll say what petnames he’d call you,,,, his fav is definitely cutie, sweetie and everything that’s tiny and pretty. what he would say? is this ok? checking on you constantly he’s worried!!!!60 he would love to hear what really gets you excited so he can do it next. his fav petname gosh that’s hard,,,, he’d tease you with a name that only you two know. as for him he talks too much, you need to kiss him so he can put that stupid tongue to a better use.RK900 fuck,,,, he’d noiselessly bask in you, your sounds, your body, everything you want him to see and more so continue like this thank you. petnames he’s a fucking moron if you think he’d be too shy to say them aloud you’re right but if you think he’s not so bold as to overcome that just to see you happy you’re wrong big wrong he’ll call you every sorts of name esp when you’re being all cuddly, his fav is ‘love’ do i even need to specify. he’d be super smooth with words when it’s just the two of you making love he doesn’t know how he can be but gosh,,,, you’re not complaining at all this guy is my weakness.

[doomedandstoned]

THE GREAT REVEAL:

OHHMS Frontman Talks Doom Metal & The Tarot

~Interview by Lara Noel~ Photos by Angelique Le Marchand

English rumblers OHHMS have been making their presence felt across oceans for over three years now, receiving near unilateral praise from critics of heavy underground music and high profile coverage from big dogs like Terrorizer.   Their rep has been solidified by an incredible series of live shows (including a match-up with one this editor's personal favs, Mammoth Weed Wizard Bastard). We figured it was high time for a good chat with OHHMS, so we dispatched our roving Gypsy reporter, Lara Noel, to interview vocalist Paul Waller about the Kent quartet's most expansive effort yet: 'The Fool' (2017 - Holy Roar Records). In addition to this fascinating exchange, Doomed & Stoned is proud to feature some stunning live moments from the recent Holy Roar 420 Fest at Boston Music Room, where OHHMS shared the stage with Bossk, Conjurer, Haast's Eagled, and Slabdragger.  These shots are captured brilliantly by Angelique Le Marchand, a regular contributor to Echoes And Dust.   It is the London photographer's first feature set in these pages and we certainly relish the opportunity to see more of her work in the future. (Billy)

Should we or shouldn't we? Let's do it.

I've listened to 'The Fool' (2017) in constant rotation.   First full-length for OHHMS, right?

Yes.   We put out two EPs, but they were pretty long.   Two songs each, both over a half-hour long.   We thought very long and hard about what we wanted to do for our first album proper, and we’re pretty stoked.   It was a long gestation period to put it together.

Listening to this release, I have to say there’s no filler.   It goes in so many different fascinating directions -- really heavy in parts, then these more ethereal moments, like the track “The Lovers.”   It’s a wild ride.

That’s just it.   When we started, I said to the guys, "I don’t care what we do, but I want to keep the talent of the first six Sabbath albums.   Do it the way you want to do it, but as long as we don’t step out of that range -- keep a running tune with the band so you don't stray too far, but we can stray as far as we can within that range of instruments."   But yeah, with a tune like “The Lovers,” should we or shouldn’t we?   I mean Metallica had “Fade To Black.”  Just do it.   Once it was in that in that context, it was like, yeah, okay.

The Fool by OHHMS

Tell me what fed into this album.   What led up to it?   What bred the lyrics and fully brought it to life?

We had just written the first EP and did a tour seeing if we could get on as mates, because you need to know if you can handle each other in a band.   On this tour, which is the end of 2014, we really did get on like fast, fast friends.   With a band, you might have a few close friends and others you really don’t know, so it was a bit like that.   So right there and then we decided to ride out our first five years and said, “Well, what do you want to do?”   With this album, I was really keen on the idea of tarot cards, with each person who purchases the album getting a past, present, and future reading.   I was really keen on that idea and played around with it in my head for a while.   Every month, we’d get a card from a designer in Italy that I really liked, so we based the whole album around these cards and the journey of the four, the different characters in this tarot pack.   Two years later, we got our final card through.   With that idea, we just ran with it.   Lyrically, it’s been so easy for me, because once I got that idea in my head, one song flowed to the next.   Such fun.   It’s been great.

That’s beautiful.   With the songwriting, is it a joint effort?

It definitely is.   We always have someone come in with a riff, whether it is me, the guitarist, the bassist, or drummer.   We can all play instruments to varying degrees.   I mean, I’m pretty shit (laughs), but the other guys, they’re all tiptop.   When we get that riff idea, we just build and build around it.   We might leave the practice room and go around and around and say, "Ok, it’s one riff" -- like a Melvins-type riff -- just so we can get the feel of it.   Then next week, we might come back and say, “You know what? That wasn’t good enough.”   Those are the times that can be quite annoying, because you spend hours and hours building up.   It’s tricky in the practice room, but we all come together.   It’s totally natural and to be honest with you, I prefer it in a practice room to being on stage, even prefer it to being in the studio.   I have the best time in the practice room with the guys.   It’s like, you know, when you’re in your room as a teenager and you put that track on that you love and you know no one else is in the house.   You’re slamming your head and dancing like a freak.   That’s what it feels like when I’m in the practice room.   I love what we do with the music and it just fills me with so much passion.   The practice room is the place to be for us.

I can’t leave without buckets of sweat. It’s the best fun.

When you’re in the practice room, what is that discovery like with the other band members?

It’s not very complex.   We rattle through ideas.   For instance, with this latest record, there’s a song that’s twenty-two minutes long at the end, "The Hierophant."   I really like listening to Sunn O))), but I really just want something more from it.   I don’t really know what it is.   When I listen to Sunn O))), I come away thinking I want more.   When it’s live, it’s insane, but on a record I just want more.   So what can we do to make a drone appealing and pique interest, more than if I was listening to a Sunn O))) record?   Our guitarist pointed me in the direction of Earth’s album Earth 2, I think it was, and it really helped influence what we could do with a drone, so that’s how that song started.   It began as a twelve minute drone we made interesting, then we cut it in half.   Our guitarist and bassist hammered out this song and before we know it, we’ve got a twenty-two minute epic beast on our hands.   The final eight minutes of that song, in the practice room, like I’ve said, I love it so much.   I can’t leave without buckets of sweat.   It’s the best fun.

I’d have to say it’s honestly my favorite track of the album.

It’s a strange one, lyrically.   It’s the only one I’ve written that has to do with personal feelings.   It’s about being dumbed down, being depressed.   You’re alone in the world.   I can’t talk about it eloquently to people, so I don’t.   It’s the first song where I’ve ever written about it.   So I said to myself, “Well, what’s alone in the universe? It’s a satellite.”   That’s how I related to it.   The lyrics just flew out.   I think everyone suffers to a certain degree with depression, at times, some people more than others, of course.   Like when someone says, “Are you alright?” It’s tricky and I can’t really talk about it.   It feels so great to play it.   When those lyrics are over and you got that last eight minutes, I feel like I can save the world.   It sounds weird, but I feel the bummed-outness, the rage -- all those emotions that tie you down and stop you from being the best person that you can be.   That was the point of that song.   Like I said, that last eight minutes are the best thing OHHMS has done so far, to me.

As artists, we all have these very expansive minds. It’s often a blessing and a curse.   I think we all fall into these depressions from time to time.   It just comes along with the territory.

Yeah. I have friends that suffer far worse than me.   I see a lot on Facebook, as huge as it is now.   Every day, I see a mega-long status by someone that I know that comes out as being mega-depressive.   Never in a million years would I have guessed this, but now it’s out there and people are talking about it far more than they did when I was growing up.   At the same time, it can be too much and I just don’t want to hear it.   I think if you get bombarded with it day after day, it does get a bit blasé and “Oh here we go again."   That sort of thing.   So I just thought, "I’m going to put it all into a song."   So far, it’s really worked for me. I feel stronger because of that song.   I’m not going to say never, but I have no intention of ever writing a personal song like that again.  My songs are always observational.   It just felt right at the time.

I just sit down and look around. People are strange, very strange.

When you say "observational," can you expand on that a bit?

Sure. You pick a song and I’ll talk to you about it!   Every song on there is observational, like you mentioned “The Lovers” earlier.   We have a newspaper over here called The Independent and I was reading an article in it a few years ago.   It was a story that stuck with me.   People who have heard “The Lovers” think it’s a love story, like it’s just some romantic song, but it’s not.   It’s about arranged marriages in Africa.   There was a man who was having an arranged marriage with a lady who was a lot younger than him and what happened is that over the course of the first year of marriage, he realized that she was not really into the marriage, spending a lot more time with his brother.   His jealousy caused him to go to the village elders and declare her as a witch.

[Suddenly, Paul’s dog interrupts the conversation barking.   “That’s my dog, Mister Puggles. I love that dog, but he’s so noisy. Hi, Mister Puggles!”   We both laugh, then resume.]

Because he was a man, they listened.   She was stoned to death out of jealousy.   He didn’t know how to relate to her and was jealous of this relationship she formed with his brother and had her killed.   I had no idea that witchcraft existed in that sort of way in people’s beliefs in Africa.   I had no idea.   That story really stuck with me and I read into it more.   I learned that witchcraft is huge everywhere.   I found the whole thing fascinating.   When it came to writing that song, I tried finding someone with a really witchy vocal.   I’m so glad we found Sienna Hollihan, a 19-year old folk artist that we met supporting a band we saw at a pub somewhere.   It was incredible.   I spent weeks and weeks with an email I didn’t send to the lead singer of Blood Ceremony, Alia O'Brien.  It was like, “Would you be able to help us? Here’s a song. I love your voice and I think it would be perfect for this track.”   I just couldn’t send it.   The fear of like, maybe she wouldn’t even reply, I just couldn’t do it.   Anyway, sneakily, we found someone who could do it, which turned out perfect.   Yeah, so there you go.  That’s “The Lovers.”   I tell you, it’s just observational material.   I just sit down and look around.   I carry these little journals with me.   Things like that fascinate me.   People are strange, very strange!

People are indeed strange.   I have to admit that I have a hobby of people watching.

When I was growing up, there was this song by Suzanne Vega where she’s sitting at a restaurant just observing people outside the window, and I feel like that’s me. (laughs)   I’m just looking at people, writing things down in my journal.   I’m such a weirdo stalker. (laughs)

He was shaking when he went into his reading.

How does this work with the rest of the band?   You’re speaking about writing in your journal and documenting your observations.   How do they take and relate to all that?

They are really cool with it.   With the first EP, there was a lot about animal rights and animal welfare on there.   I had just gotten Mister Puggles and I just couldn’t eat meat anymore.   I was a meat eater up until the day I got him.   He’s become like my best friend.   It’s bizarre.   I just didn’t eat meat anymore.   There was no rhyme or reason to it.   I write a daily note about it.   I write poetry about it.   I write in my journal about it.   In the band, we’ve got a couple of meat eaters, and I just thought they’re not going to be cool with that, but they really were.   They respected that this was my opinion.   They give me complete artistic freedom and I do with them, but sometimes they will change things up.   Say, if I’m singing a certain melody and I’m ripping off Paul Stanley, or I’m ripping off Ozzy or Bruce Dickinson, I just don’t know why I do it.   I hate it, but they always pick it up.   They always say, well, I can redo this, and I’m glad for it, or else -- oh my God -- what would that record sound like?   They’ve never said anything negative to me about the lyrics.   This album artwork that we spent such a long time on, that was tied in with the tarot, I just thought it was really key that the lyrics were actually printed this time.   This way, you can read along as the song is going, because it's clean vocals.   I find that you can follow along even without them printed, but sometimes things get lost in translation.

I think even without the lyrics printed, the album speaks for itself.   It’s a beautifully crafted record that goes through all these transitions and it actually feels like a tarot reading.

That’s the whole fantastic thing about this process.   A print magazine from the UK wanted us to go for a tarot reading.   Then another one, I think CVLT Nation, wanted us to film a tarot reading, as well.   I’d never had it done before.   The thing I love about the tarot more than anything is the artwork.   It just stirs so much emotion in me.   It’s such a wonderful thing to look at.   Writing this record and learning about the tarot, the artists reading the cards -- I was fascinated by it.   I’m quite the skeptic, as is the bass player, and he was shaking when he went into his reading.   I don’t know what he’s done in his past, but he was terrified.   He had a little flask of whiskey with him, as well, and before he went into his reading he had taken a few swigs, just to calm himself.   The strangest thing happened.   We both went in for separate readings in October and November, and we both pulled out exactly the same cards.   It was spot on the same.   It spelt disaster -- something awful is going to happen unless we manage things carefully.   So we both left the tarot reader going, “Nooooo!” (laughs)

There’s just something. It’s like a magnet. It draws me to it.

Do you have a favorite tarot deck?

I really do.   It’s one that I’ve bought in the last year.   I think in the mid '90s, a lot of tarot decks came out and they were pretty air brushy, wishy washy with the artwork.   I didn’t like it.   I came across one late last year.   It was the artist Klimt, with his artwork interpreted into the tarot.   It blows me away.   You will not believe how well it works.   That’s my favorite.   I’ve got several now and they’re very expensive, so I’m going to stop buying them (laughs).   Yeah, I can’t even afford to buy records anymore, let alone have a collection of tarot decks.   It’s awful. (laughs)   I just really love the artwork and that’s what pulled me in.   I’m just so proud of the artwork, let alone the music, but the artwork.   Just as a whole.

The artwork with tarot is interesting, because it feeds off you going into that other realm.   I think the artwork is important, contributing to the act itself.   When an artist is really able to pull off the meaning of the cards, it’s so different.

I’m just so proud of the artwork for this album, let alone the music, but the artwork, just as a whole.   It was a series of very long-winded calls.   We had conference calls going on between the band members and our artist.   It was quite hard to get the point across we wanted.   It took a few attempts before we got on the right track, but yeah, you’re so right; it’s ever so important to make sense of things.   Even if you have a tarot reader who has years of experience, an order of cards could come up that completely throws them.   I could see this with our tarot reader when we had our readings done, that she was taking inspiration from the card itself, from the artwork and the position of the characters in the card.   Again, that’s something I didn’t know about before it happened.   It’s a completely fascinating thing.   I love horror.   I love supernatural things.   I love all that, but I’m so skeptical.   And yet, I reckon even if I saw something that wouldn’t make anyone else believe or what’s going on scientifically to prove that wrong, I don’t know. I don’t know.   There’s just something.   It’s like a magnet, it draws me to it.   My whole life has been like that.   Even as a kid, when I first started getting into music, horror and gore, then later on, spiritual biographies and things like that.   It’s something that means a lot to me.   I’m not sure I could tell you why.   It’s just always been there, since I could remember.   Like how do you feel?   Are you a skeptic with tarot cards yourself?

No.   In fact, I actually read tarot cards.   Readings for myself, too.

No way!   That’s amazing.   So did anything I said make sense to you, like how you can pull information just from the position of a character?   I just find it fascinating

If I bought this record and put it on my turntable, I’d say, “What the hell was that?”

It is.   I’ve done readings where people didn’t always want to hear what was coming from the cards.   In a way, I equate tarot to music.  There are a lot of albums that are like tarot readings.   It may sound silly, but even if you go to a live Grateful Dead show, it’s exactly like a tarot reading: the songs they play, the state of mind that you’re in, the way it all flows.

I totally agree.   Putting together The Fool, it was a long, hard process, because not only did you want to get a nice flow of the songs, but it was being related to the tarot.   You can’t just throw that shit together.   It has to feel right and it has to appear right.   There are hidden messages and hidden symbols all over the artwork.   If people want to explore that, they can.   If you’re not into tarot and even not into the artwork, then just play it and bang your head, but for those who want to gain something from it, there’s a lot on there.   I put a lot of thought into it, a lot of meticulous hours with my guy in Italy.   I can’t wait for people to hear it and start messaging me and saying, “Is this because of this?”

Some people will actually get it in the sense that you actually meant, but other people will take away something else, and that in itself is almost like a tarot reading.

I can’t believe you’re a tarot reader.   That’s great.   That’s made my day.   Just to know that you’ve listened to this from that sort of angle is perfect, and the fact that you’re psychic, as well. (laughs)   It’s strange, as far as what’s been released before.   It’s far doomier and stoner rock based.   The Black Sabbath element, the guys really brought it out.   We got played on a national radio station with the song, “The World.”   To be played on the radio was mad.   Some of the comments were like, “Don’t know about this...”   Then a week later, getting comments from the same people saying, “Getting it. Loved it.”   At first, I was worried people would be like, “That’s not the band I fell in love with.”   It’s all still there.   Maybe "mature" might be the wrong word, but it feels a little more mature.   I feel like if I was a fan of OHHMS, and I am a fan of OHHMS -- when I’m in that rehearsal room, I’m a fan -- if I bought this record, brought it home, and put it on my turntable, I’d say, “What the hell was that?”   Straight again, that’s the reason I put some of those pop like hooks in there.   We don’t get enough of those earwormy melodies you might have gotten in an '80s pop song.   I’m not afraid of that.   [Paul sings a tune]   That little nursery rhyme-type rhythm that sticks in your head, that’s what I really want.   I want people to remember it and dig deeper, 'cause there’s a lot of subtleties on there.   I want people to get it.

Again, some people are going to get that and others aren’t.

That’s one thing I’m also a little bit cautious about.   I mean a lot of these songs are observational, like the song, “The Lovers.”   If someone hears that, they’re going to think it’s a love song and it might ruin their interest or view of the song, what it’s really about -- pulling them away from the true topic of that song.   I don’t know how to handle that.   Do you admit what it’s really about or do you keep it a secret?   Like you said, if you read that as a tarot reading, how that was sort of meant to be digested, then like you said, you’re going to take away something that’s really personal to yourself, and I don’t want to put a fork in that road for people or have them step over rocks to get to the original point where they understand themselves.

To hear you speak about the background of the song, I personally want to go back and listen to it again and relive the whole experience.

When I was doing this with Sienna and I go back hearing how she hit those notes, it breaks my heart every time.   I went to the lyrics and I said, “You can change whatever you like,” because it was this 19-year old girl who’s never appeared on an album before, never been in a recording studio, either.   My concerns I expressed was for her to do what she likes and feel comfortable, but she said, “No, I love what you’ve written. Let’s do it.”   When we were listening to her singing that, we were all looking at each other, like when you get those prickles and your hair stands up -- one of those moments.   She totally nailed it.   In the future, I think it’s going to be difficult now, because it brings back my initial reaction to that story.   It’s a good story.   It’s mad, mad.   It was one of those things where when she wasn’t even singing words and just [Paul hums a melody], it was like, “Oh my word. My breath is taken away.”   I have listened to some of her recordings, but nothing prepares you for her standing there singing in front of you.  It’s weird.   It’s witchy.  It feels earthy.   I wish I had the vocabulary to explain how I felt.

It’s a very unexpected track, yet it works and is right where it needs to be.   The song audibly is beautiful, but you can feel that there is heartache involved.

Yes, and I reckon I owe a lot of that to her.   It was sort of weird for me to sing in that kind of low, groovy-type register, but yeah, she just nailed it.   Thank God we found her, 'cause if not, I’d be sitting here still waiting to hit that send button for Alia O, Brien! (laughs)

So we’re going to give a shout out Sienna!   Paul, thank you so much for talking with Doomed and Stoned.   It’s been an amazing conversation and so wonderful hearing more about what went into this album.

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