#jaskier & aiden
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The first witcher Jaskier met besides Geralt was Aiden, a member of the Cat School, who had been hired to assassinate him.
Technically speaking, Aiden's contract was to eliminate the Viscount of Lettenhove, but he was taken aback to discover that the target was actually the same Bard who sings about the witcher he'd heard so much about.
Instead of fulfilling his contract, Aiden and Jaskier found themselves sharing a rather pleasant picnic.
Geralt, unaware of this turn of events, is frantically searching for the Cat witcher who he believes is out to kill his Bard.
At the same time, Lambert, having heard that his fellow witcher is intent on hunting down his dear friend, is racing to find Geralt to prevent him from killing Aiden.
#the witcher netflix#the witcher#geralt of rivia#joey batey#jaskier the witcher#henry cavill#the witcher jaskier#geralt x jaskier#geraskier#fic ideas#aiden and jaskier are besties#the witcher aiden#the witcher lambert#lambert x aiden#jaskier#gerskier#cirilla fiona elen riannon#freya allan#headcanon#yennefer of vengerberg#the witcher season 3#the witcher season three#anya chalotra
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Poor vesemir, he tries to give his pups life lessons beyond being a witcher, but this is the kaer MORONS we are talking about. The following occurs when they are all trying to make dinner one evening.
Papa vesemir: ok boys familiarize yourself with the spices, these can make walking the path a little nicer, as you can look forward to a delicious meal at the end of a rough day
So they go over to the spice rack to read the labels.
Eskel: basil, oregano, cilantro (yuck), coriander, thyme, paprika...
Geralt: hmm, ground pepper, sounds spicy. Hmm, not sure I like the sound of garlic, seems spicier...
Lambert: cinnamon, nutmeg. Cum? DRIED CUM!?!?!
Eskel: what?? Cum?? Is this a prank??
Geralt: did jaskier put you up to this??
Lambert: I'm not fucking eating dried cum!!!
Papa vesemir: Its CUMIN YOU IDIOTS. that's it! Everyone out of my kitchen and go run the walls, everyones getting plain boiled potatoes for the rest of the week!
Geralt: yay! Finally some good food!
Papa Vesemir: OUT!!!
Jaskier (in the background): *dumping a mouthful of the dried "cum" in his mouth and then gagging* that's NOT CUM!
Papa vesemir: *internally* I bet guxart doesn't have this problem with the cat witchers
*** across the continent at the cat caravan***
Aiden: *gagging* that's NOT CUM!
Guxart: *internally* I bet vesemir doesn't have this problem with the wolf witchers
#my nonsense#jaskier#geralt#geraskier#kaer morons#lambert#another day in kaer morhen#bard in kaer morhen#geralt nomming series#papa vesemir#papa vesemir vs lambert#aiden#guxart#eskel#vesemir#wolf witchers#cat witchers
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Jaskier meets Aiden at some point while traveling (for once without Geralt). They hit it off IMMEDIATELY and within an hour, are comparing notes over everything from their respective wolf lovers, favorite wines, best market cities, and weirdest small town traditions.
When they start comparing how many gay-wakenings they've each caused (of course they keep a tally, the dorks), they're annoyed to realize that GERALT is in the lead - and without trying at all.
Apparently, Jaskier's White Wolf songs are a little too popular...
#the witcher#jaskier#aiden the witcher#aiden & jaskier are besties and you can't convince me otherwise
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What Jaskier sees daily as he wanders the grounds of Kaer Morhen
(Vesemir is crying in a corner somewhere because his sons are idiots)
#kaer morons showing off#everywhere he looks#jaskier#julian alfred pankratz#geralt#geralt of rivia#lambert#eskel#coen#aiden#vesemir#kaer morons#the witcher#twn#the witcher netflix
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Prompt 63
After The Mountain™, Jaskier is desperate to prove himself a Worthy Travel Companion™ to Geralt, so he decides to take up alchemy. Perhaps if he gets very good at brewing Geralt's potions, Geralt will find him worthy of keeping around. When Geralt takes Jaskier to Kaer Morhen, he can't help but notice that Jaskier is suddenly spending every possible second with Lambert. LAMBERT. I mean, he loves his brother, don't get him wrong! But Lambert? Geralt's words were cruel, and he was still working out the full apology he wanted to give Jaskier (He deserved better than just an "I'm sorry") but he's worried that he's already lost his chance, as Jaskier is seemingly finding himself a new witcher.
#geraskier#the witcher#geralt x jaskier#geralt x dandelion#witcher fanfiction#fanfiction prompts#geralt loves his bard!#writing prompts#friends to lovers#requited unrequited love#love confessions#this post is not free from the mountain 2019#the mountain#the mountain breakup#rare species#witcher episode rare species#Jealous Geralt#extra points if there's secondary Lambert X Aiden!!!!#all my blorbos#kaer morons#kaer morhen#lambert#witcher lambert#lambert the witcher#geralt#geralt of rivia#geralt z rivii#witcher geralt#geralt the witcher#jaskier
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Witcher Fic Recs
Wanted to make a list of some of my favorite Witcher fics! Most of these are not Jaskier/Geralt, but I did add some, and they are just as good! A lot are also Explicit, and some need an AO3 account to access. Feel free to message me if you want your work taken off this list.
*I do not claim any of these fics as mine, and I give all the credit to the original authors*
"Bat Out of Water" by @tafkamayle One of if not my favorite Witcher fic! 65k words, Explicit, Jaskier/Geralt Jaskier/Eskel Jaskier/Lambert, Vampire and Pirate AU
"The Songbird of The Cats" by @ohwhoopsok I've read this one so many times I cannot recommend it enough! 28k words, Mature, Jaskier/OCs Jaskier/Aiden Jaskier/Lambert, Jaskier becomes the School of the Cats new obsession, little non-human Jaskier
"The Shape of Love" by @jaskierswolf 17k words, Teen and Up, Shifter AU, Geralt/Jaskier, there's a bunch of works in this series and they're all great!
"Fateful Red" by @tafkamayle again, 16k words, Explicit, Jaskier/Geralt, Soulmates and No Powers AU, I love this one so much!
"That's my Jam(bert)" by @greenbirddraws/GreenBird, 14k words, Explicit, Jaskier/Lambert, I love them together so much!
"So Tight I'd Bruise You" by @sweetpeapod 496 words, General Audience, Jaskier/Lambert, little hurt/comfort and soft Lambert
"Cat Up A Tree(Going Down on a Witcher)" by Hallianna, 10k words, Explicit, Aiden/Jaskier/Lambert, love this one a lot!
"Bring Your Hunger" by @sweetpeapod again, 2k words, Teen and Up, Jaskier/Lambert, teasing and fluff
"Take a Chance on Second Chances" by Caelanmiriel, 9k words, Explicit, Jaskier/Lambert, some courting rituals
"Fingertips" by @ohwhoopsok again, 3k words, Explicit, Jaskier/Lambert, Lambert can't get hard, some fluff, this one is super sweet!
"to the wolves" by @besselfcn 1k words, Mature, Jaskier/Lambert/Eskel/Geralt, Past SA, hurt/comfort, revenge, past Valdo/Jaskier
"I Just Want to Feel You" by @stfustucky 6k words, Explicit, Jaskier/Geralt/Lambert/Eskel, Geralt and Eskel fuck up some aftercare so Lambert has to make things right, super sweet one!
"Soap, and the Scents of Home" by @round--robin/round_robin 32k words, Explicit, Jaskier/Geralt/Eskel/Lambert, lots of touch-starved Witchers, Scent kink, an amazing series!
"5 Times Geralt was Cat-Like (+1 Time He Was Wolf-Like)" by @xrdragonix 2k, General Audience, Geralt/Jaskier, Wolf and Cat traits, super cute and wholesome!
If you enjoyed any of these please let the authors know with comments, kudos, and/or bookmarking it!
#the witcher#witcher netflix#witcher geralt#witcher#witcher 3#witcher fanfiction#witcher lambert#witcher eskel#geralt#geralt of rivia#jaskier#geralt x jaskier#jaskier x lambert#jaskier/eskel#jaskier/lambert#lambert x jaskier#jaskier x geralt#jaskier x aiden#jaskier/aiden#lambert x aiden#aiden witcher#fanfic rec#ao3#ao3 fanfic#ao3 link#fanfic#fanfiction#geralt fanfic#not my fic#not my fanfic
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#the witcher#jaskier#geralt of rivia#geralt#the witcher netflix#witcher#dandelion#julian alfred pankratz#vesemir#papa vesemir#eskel#lambert#witcher aiden#kaer morons
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Due to his school being a little more diverse in the contracts it accepts (assassination, theft, etc), you can bet Aiden's going be a pretty passable actor, or at least have some decent improv skills when the occasion calls for it. Jaskier is a bard and a spy - enough said.
So, picture the two of them engaging in a friendly one upmanship of situations they've had to bullshit their way out of while Lambert and Geralt just sit listening in mute horror and strongly considering child harnesses for their SO's because 'fucking hell, how are these two actually still alive??!!?'
Geralt: I'm never letting you out of my sight again.
Jaskier: I know Love. Finish your porridge.
Lambert: Wait, that was when....where the fuck was I during all this?
Aiden: I snuck out when you were occupied at the Inn. We weren't even fucking at that point and you looked like you were getting somewhere with that Skellige bloke, I didn't want to interrupt. Besides, it should have been just a quick in and out.
Jaskier: Is that what Lambert said to the Skellige bloke?
*Lambert starts spluttering and choking around his mouthful of small ale while Aiden just about falls out of his seat he's laughing so hard.*
#the witcher#the witcher headcanon#geraskier#witcher jaskier#jaskier#jaskier x geralt#geralt x jaskier#witcher geralt#geralt of rivia#geralt/jaskier#Geralt#aiden/lambert#aiden x lambert#lambden#lambert/aiden#lambert x aiden#witcher aiden#witcher lambert#lambert
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Three wolves, a cat, a griffin and a bard walk into a hotspring…
#the witcher 3#the witcher#geralt of rivia#jaskier#dandelion the witcher#aiden x lambert#lambert#witcher eskel#tw3 eskel#aiden the witcher#coën#school of the wolf#school of the cat#Kaer Morhen's hotsprings#kaer morhen#kaer morons#geraskier#gay bears#boys will be boys#they're all gay#artistic nude
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New headcannon: most Witchers don't have a lot of sex. The rumour that Witchers are really sexually active was started due to Vesemir's slut era and was solidified due to Geralt's escapades.
Everyone else has depression and can't get it up
#the witcher#the witcher netflix#witcher geralt#witcher#jaskier#witcher lambert#witcher eskel#jaskier'sbaddecisions™#aiden witcher#incorrect witcher quotes
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It's winter in Oxenfurt, and Jaskier is spending these months working as a professor at the Academy. One night, he finds a cat outside in the cold. Not wanting the animal to freeze, Jaskier decides to take him in.
In some ways, the cat reminds him of Geralt.
When spring arrives, Geralt comes to fetch Jaskier, temporarily accompanied by Lambert. Jaskier's cat persistently meows at Lambert.
Unbeknownst to everyone, Jaskier's pet cat is actually Aiden, a Witcher.
#the witcher netflix#the witcher#joey batey#geralt of rivia#jaskier the witcher#henry cavill#the witcher jaskier#geralt x jaskier#geraskier#fic ideas#lambert x aiden#the witcher lambert#aiden and jaskier are besties#the witcher aiden#jaskier#gerskier#cirilla fiona elen riannon#freya allan#headcanon#yennefer of vengerberg#the witcher season 3#the witcher season three#anya chalotra
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Jaskier: *Screams*
Geralt: jaskier!? What's wrong??
Jaskier: i was cutting jalapeños and rubbed my eyes. I got the fucking juice in my eyes!
Lambert: Quick someone pee on it!
Eskel: No peanut butter!
Aiden: Garlic butter???
Papa vesemir: *already dragging jaskier to the sink to rinse out his eyes* I'm surrounded by idiots
(This is based on an incident at work. I was the one who suggested peanut butter 😆😆😆. Coworker is fine, he was rinsing his eyes out when we made all the terrible suggestions)
#my nonsense#jaskier#geralt#geraskier#kaer morons#lambert#another day in kaer morhen#eskel#bard in kaer morhen#geralt nomming series#papa vesemir#aiden
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Lambert smiles, sharp and ugly, "I know who you pretend I am."
Jaskier doesn't deny it. They both know he can't.
"Touche" he says lightly, skimming his fingers across the strings. Lambert can see the marks of his own nails in his back. He's bleeding faintly. "Remind what his name was again?"
Lambert sits up sharp in bed. "Don't you dare."
"Oh, Aiden, right?" Jaskier strums a chord. The name sounds like music in his mouth. "Aiden. Aiden at night, Aiden in the morning. Aiden in your breath and your tears and your mouth, Aiden so deep you can't claw him out."
"Get that name out of your mouth, bard," Lambert says. "Before I break it."
There is no fear in those blue eyes, no pity. Only a cold understanding. "Leave my wounds and I'll leave yours."
"Don't compare us." Lambert snarls.
"Why not?" Jaskier says. "We're exactly the same. That's why this works."
"My brother's alive."
Jaskier smiles, and there's something broken and desperate in it, like a shattered mirror. Lambert wonders if he looks like that, if it shows on his face in the same way.
"Yes, Geralt's alive. He's here, but I don't have him. I never had him. I will never have him. You had Aiden. All you had to do was be brave."
"Don't have him anymore." Lambert says.
"No." Jaskier responds. "Why else do you think we're here?"
#lambert x aiden#lambert x jaskier#lambert/jaskier#lambert/aiden#geraskier#my lambden lambskier geraskier fic has taken over my head#the witcher#the witcher fanfiction#i didn't edit this#might expand on this later#thank you to the 25 people reading herodias#my witcher fic#my angst brain took over#angst#fanfic#ao3 author#ao3fic#ao3 rec
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What Jaskier sees while watching the Kaer Morons do repairs to the Keep.
#the witcher#twn#the witcher netflix#the witcher headcanon#jaskier#julian alfred pankratz#geralt#geralt of rivia#geraskier#eskel#coen#lambert#vesemir#aiden#kaer morons
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Prompt 52
Jaskier is running away from his abusive home, cutting them all off without a word, and disappearing into the night to move to somewhere with a better future for himself. Only issue? He has no car, or money. So he sucks it up and tries hitchhiking, regardless of all the horror stories everyone tells you about. He was expecting some awkward drive with some old random trucker or something, like what always happens in the movies. What he wasn't expecting was for three brothers on a yearly family bonding road trip to agree to take him with them across multiple states (or uk equivalent) What he REALLY wasn't expecting was to fall in love with one of the men, who has long white hair, piercing golden eyes, an awkward-shaped smile, a ridiculously named pet horse, and a stupid sense of humor.
#modern au#road trip#road trip au#hitchhiking#hitchhiker au#geraskier#fanfiction prompts#geralt x dandelion#the witcher#geralt x jaskier#witcher fanfiction#geralt loves his bard!#writing prompts#fluff#fluffy#strangers to friends to lovers#optional aiden tagging along as lamberts plus one#give me jask and lambert spraying gas station pop directly into their mouth#and jask and eskel birdwatching at a rest stop#and geralt sitting uncomfortably so that jask can sleep leaning against him#kaer morons#the witchers#eskel#ALIVE ESKEL#(stupid netflix show)#lambert#witcher eskel#witcher lambert
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Hi! So.... How is Zombie!Aiden doing nowadays? (As you can tell, I've found your necromancer au, and I'm hooked)
A continuation of this from my necromancer!au. With the skeleton guys in the beginning (something that this Jaskier doesn't remember) it was more lighthearted. And it isn't the first time that corpses start to get reanimated it Jaskiers proximity too, but this time he pulled Aiden out of the afterlife and well- this is more of a warm bodies scenario and he is under Jaskiers thrall, if Jaskier likes it or not. lambert is so not going to be amused
#jaskier#geraskier#geralt of rivia#the witcher#necromancer!jaskier#witcher aiden#Aiden will have to relearn how to live#Geralt is concerned and distrustful because he gotta protect#(it's not needed Jaskier could kill him again with a snap - although he is not aware of it)#the baby-bard can do more than before but has not even an ounce of the practice and control he had in the past#geralt is kind of aware of this#people who are technically zombie in this au: Jaskier Ciri Aiden and Roach! (Geralt has had her for fourty years yet)#Aiden is the only one who was dead for a while tho and it's not like Ciri or Jaskier#he starts out as more like a puppet#lambert is gonna he appalled and furious#thank you for the ask!! i had nearly forgotten about zombie aiden 🙈#animal death
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