#jascha look!!!

[moxsquanch]

MOXSQUANCH'S OFFICIAL FAVOURITE MAMMA MIA SONGS IN ORDER:

Disclaimers: slipping through my fingers is #1 but i cant listen to it bc it makes me cry so it's not ranked + the lower songs on this list are still A tier songs by normal music standards i don't hate any of them - this list killed me to make it was so hard

1. voulez vous

2. gimmie gimmie gimmie

3. chiquitita

4. lay all your love on me

5. does your mother know

6. take a chance on me

7. winner takes it all

8. dancing queen

9. i have a dream

10. i do, i do, i do

11. mamma mia

12. super trouper

13. the name of the game

14. thank you for the music

15. honey honey

16. money money money

17. under attack

18. entr'act

19. knowing me knowing you

20. s.o.s

21. overture/prologue

22. our last summer

23. one of us

[footy-fictionist]

Championship loss - Julian Brandt

Pairing: Julian Brandt x female reader

Warnings: I'm gonna break your hearts again with the Championship loss, but also a lot of fluff, soft moments, teeny tiny bit of teasing, badly translated German, mentions of Jannis and Jascha

Word Count: 1653

Note: As always, English is not my first language. This one has been on my mind since we lost. Next one should be a Jude one and then I can get to the requests in my inbox. This one just had to come out now. Remember it's fictional, some parts may be alike with real life and some I just came up with. Please do not copy and/or publish my work, reblogging is perfectly fine!

Dortmund vs Mainz. The last game of the season and all we needed to do was win. Win so we could win the league. Win so we could lift the Meisterschale. That was the dream, everything Dortmund had worked so hard for and we didn’t win it. The equalizer from Niklas wasn’t enough because Bayern won their game. And now everything has become a nightmare. She’s watching speechless as she sees the defeat and utter disbelief on everyone’s faces. 

But the one she is worried about most hasn’t come back onto the field again. Julian was subbed out in the 62nd minute and she knows he’s beating himself up. She may not be able to see him from where she’s stood, but she can feel his pain. Pain she also feels because she loves Dortmund, but it’s probably nothing compared to Julian’s pain and the other players. She’s not even surprised that not a single fan has left the stadium, the fans loyal to a fault. She’s still trying to find him when the stadium camera’s zoom in on the bench and there he is. Eyes red and teary, a few wet streaks and Julian just staring into the distance. That’s the moment she started crying too.

She watched as Terzic went to Julian and patted him on the face. The camera’s stopped showing the bench after that and a few moments later Julian stepped back out on the pitch. She watched as he slowly made his way to his teammates in front of the yellow wall. He didn’t really approach anyone, just standing between everyone and she knows he is already closing himself off. The disappointment is clear everywhere and yet the yellow wall sings and they support their players. They clap for the yellow wall, apologizing to the fans and thanking them for their support. 

She watches as Julian crouches down, hand going over his face. She grabs onto Jascha’s arm, who has been standing next to her the whole game. He looks down at her, eyes leaving his brother. He sees the pain on her face, the tears still streaming even if she wipes them every few minutes. He pulls his arm out of her grip and she looks up at him a little panicked. She’s scared that she had upset her younger brother-in-law, only to have him wrap his arm around her shoulders to help comfort her. In return she wraps an arm around his waist. She looks back to where she last saw Julian only to see his deflated form sitting near Nico. 

All she wants to do is go to him, but she can’t. She’ll have to wait till he comes to her. She watches as the team gets up and goes to walk past the fans. The fans comfort the players as they walk by, a few of them giving away their jerseys, Julian included. And even though it really isn’t the time, she can’t help but admire Julian and his physique. She sees him shirtless all the time, but after a game it always hits differently. But it’s not just his physique, it’s the way he takes the time with fans, talks with them and shows them he is as disappointed as they are. And yet he appreciates every single fan. His introverted side is not in sight with the fans. But she knows that’ll change once they’re alone.

She notices that Jascha stopped rubbing her arm and that’s when she notices her tears have stopped as well. She turns to him and thanks him for being a brilliant brother-in-law. She spots Jannis still near the other photographers, he turns that exact moment and they lock eyes. He waves at her and she manages to wave back with a bittersweet smile before he turns back to take more pictures. That’s when Jascha softly squeezes her arm and she follows his gaze to the pitch. And she sees her favourite sweaty blonde walk towards them. 

His head is down, but he walks with purpose.

She already has the boarding digging into her hips before he’s even close. But the second he’s close enough, her arms wrap around his shoulders. It’s as though a weight drops off his shoulders and he wraps his arms around her waist. They hide their faces against each other’s necks. She inhales his scent, a scent that’s pure Julian and she hears him do the same. She can’t help but tighten her grip on him a little and move one hand to his golden locks. He pulls her in a little closer and presses a few small, soft kisses to the nape of her neck. 

“Ich bin so stolz auf dich, Schatzie.” 

“Wofür? We drew the game and lost the title. We bottled it.” 

She immediately pulls away and he looks at her a little offended that she’s pulled away from him so quickly. She immediately makes sure to make it up to him by putting her hands on his jaw and drawing his face closer to hers. His arms tighten around her again as she does so and she presses a few butterfly kisses across his face. 

“I’m proud of you for the good times, the bad times and everything in between. You have given it your all, you all managed to get back from 9 points difference. You battled through an injury whilst being in your prime and you still managed to give Bayern the biggest challenge they’ve had in years. You, Julian Brandt, are one of the best players on this team and if you’d ask me alone, I’d tell everyone you are the best. For your spirit, your passion, your perseverance, your love for the club and the fans. You live and breathe football at this club Schatzie. And I wouldn’t be surprised if you’d end up being like Reus for the fans. You give everything and more Jule and you can’t imagine how proud I am that I get to call you mine.”

As she’s talking to him, she can see a few tears start to gather on his lashes again. He presses his forehead to hers and the smile he gives her is brighter than the sun. She returns the smile and presses a kiss to his lips. It’s sweet, loving and passionate all at once. 

“Ich liebe dich.” He whispers against her lips and she smiles, returning the phrase to him. 

It’s then that they realize where they are and that they’re not alone. Julian presses another quick kiss against her lips before going to hug Jascha, who is giving him a mischievous look. Both Julian and her give Jascha suspicious looks but he just waves them away. They share a look but let it go. Mats approaches them to tell Julian that they have to go inside. Julian nods and turns back to her one more time. He presses another kiss to her lips. 

“Will you wait for me here in the stadium?” She nods at him and presses another kiss to his lips.

As he makes his way to the dressing room, she and Jascha head inside to wait for Julian in the family area. She gets the chance to ask Jascha what his mischievous look was for. He just glances at her and tells her to look at her phone. She gives him a confused look but does as he says. She sees a few messages from him and the second she opens them, she knows why he was acting that way. He took some pictures of her interaction with Julian. And she can’t help but feel happy that he did. It’s clear in the pictures that they clearly love each other very much and she knows she’ll definitely use one as her background and that she’ll hang a few in their apartment. 

“Danke, Jascha.” 

Jascha just shrugs and gives her a wink. They talk for about 20 minutes and during that time Jannis has joined them. He’s showing her some of the pictures he made when some players finally enter the room. Julian makes an immediate beeline towards them, ignoring everyone else and she knows he’s in his own headspace now. He gives Jannis a slap on his back and then moves to wrap his arm around her. He stands close to her, now without the boarding between them. His forehead leans against her temple and she runs a hand through his still partially wet hair. 

They go home soon after that and once home they order some food and crash on the couch. He’s quiet as he hands her the remote for the tv. He makes sure she’s in the corner of the couch and then goes to lie down between her legs, his front pressed against hers, head on her chest. She chooses a series and runs her fingers through his hair as they wait for their food. They don’t talk and she knows Julian isn’t paying attention to the tv. He’s in his own head, thinking of today’s outcome.

They eat in silence once the food arrives and then move to their bed. She knows he needs his own headspace to get over it and she lets him approach her if he needs anything. She’s used to it and she knows it’s what he’s most comfortable with. He’s in bed before her, but the second she gets on the bed he immediately pulls her to him. He pulls her as close to him as he can, her head on his chest this time and the sound of his heartbeat calms her completely. His scent envelopes her again and she sighs in complete content, making Julian smile and press a kiss to her hairline. 

“Danke, meine Liebe. Ich liebe dich.”

"Natürlich, Schatzie. Ich liebe dich für immer.”

This time it’s Julian that sighs in content. He presses one more kiss to her hairline and then they both drift off. 

Ich bin so stolz auf dich, Schatzie: I am so proud of you darling Wofür?: For what? Ich liebe dich (für immer): I love you (always/forever) Danke: thank you Meine Liebe: my love Natürlich: of course

[soracities]

"I think I mentioned that there was a gramophone player and a record among all the things brought from Brasov. Just one record. I don’t know why he’d got hold of just one and why it was that one. On one side was a Hungarian dance by Brahms and on the other a Spanish dance by Granados, both played on the violin by Jascha Heifetz. It was a red His Master’s Voice record and I can still see it perfectly, though for some reason I haven’t bothered to look for it since. For two weeks, in the morning, at lunchtime, and in the evening—mostly in the evening, after dinner—waiting on the veranda for midnight, we listened to those two melodies, which became so familiar to us that they ceased being pieces of music and became a kind of domestic ritual, an integral part of our life there, similar to all the other household sounds—familiar footfalls on the porch, the ticking of the clock on the wall, the noise of a door opening and shutting. See, so many years have passed, I’ve forgotten so much and will forget so much more, but I think I’ll always remember those songs. Not because they’re beautiful—I don’t even know if they are—but because the holiday is contained so deeply within them that not even Andrei, who only knows tangos, has ever forgotten them."

Mihail Sebastian, Women (trans. Phillip Ó Ceallaigh)

[trauma-report]

𝐀 𝐖𝐄𝐄𝐊𝐄𝐍𝐃 𝐀𝐓 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐎𝐎𝐊 𝐇𝐎𝐓𝐄𝐋

Do you dare to check in? 🛎️ The infamous Overlook Hotel, nestled in the isolated Colorado Rockies, has a dark and mysterious history. Known for its eerie atmosphere and paranormal activity, the hotel has attracted visitors looking for a thrilling experience. This weekend, a group of individuals, each with their own reasons, has checked in. As night falls, strange occurrences begin to happen, turning a weekend getaway into a nightmare. ⸻ imagine yourself in the situation and create your character as they are trapped in a horror movie come true. bonus: get your creative juices flowing and write a oneshot. what happened before the picture? where is your character headed now? are they searching for their friends/the people that arrived with them or are they investigating something different entirely? what else is lurking amongst the shadows?

special guests (yes, Ana, I stole that from you): @ausgetrieben ,@thisis-elijah , @phasmophobie (kind of), @ertraeumte and @heartofglass-mindofstone

Colorado hätte eine Zuflucht sein sollen. Ein Ort am anderen Ende der Welt, an dem die Russen weder Elsie, noch ihn finden konnten. Die Russen. Seine eigenen Landsleute, gegen die er sich gewandt hatte, nur um die Frau beschützen zu können, nach deren Fähigkeiten sie trachteten. Nach mehr Macht, mehr Möglichkeiten, um über allen anderen stehen zu können. Jahrelang hatte er in diesem Teufelskreis mitgewirkt, der darin bestanden hatte, zu töten, zu sabotieren und Regierungen zu stürzen, damit seine Leute alles neu aufbauen und besser kontrollieren konnten. Es war befreiend gewesen, sich aus eben jener Kontrolle zu winden. Als wäre er ein Tier gewesen, das jahrelang in einer Falle gesessen hatte, aus der es nur schwer war zu entrinnen. Und gleichzeitig fühlte er sich seither so verloren wie noch nie in seinem Leben. Ohne Sicherheit, ohne Ziel waren Elsie und er um den halben Globus gereist, in der Hoffnung irgendwie so weit weg von ihren Häschern zu kommen, wie nur irgendwie möglich. Und sie hatten beide tatsächlich geglaubt, dass sie diese mitten im Nirgendwo der Rocky Mountains finden würden. Dass sie dort außerhalb der Reichweite von Furcht und Terror sein könnten, doch das Schicksal meinte es mal wieder nicht gut mit ihnen. 

Die kalte, finstere Nacht, die sich über die verschneite Landschaft gelegt hatte, hüllte auch das Overlook Hotel in eine dicke Decke des Schweigens. Jascha hatte in der Stadt gehört, dass es seit Jahren leerstand, weil es dort angeblich spukte. Der ideale Ort also, um unerkannt unterzutauchen, vor allem im Winter, wenn kaum jemand nach diesem Ort sah. Ein Fenster einzuschlagen, um sich Zutritt zu verschaffen war da noch das Leichteste gewesen. An Geistergeschichten hatte Jascha noch nie geglaubt, auch wenn er durch Elsie’s träumerische Gabe bereits wusste, dass es in dieser Welt Dinge gab, die sich dem menschlichen Verstand entzogen. Und doch würde ihn dieser Ort eines Besseren belehren.  Die ersten Nächte waren ruhig. Erholsam ruhig nach all den Strapazen der letzten Monate, die dem Speznas beinahe jeden Mut gekostet hätten. Er hatte sich verändert. Aber ob zum Guten oder Schlechten, das konnte er nach wie vor nicht beurteilen.  “Ich mag es hier nicht…”, hatte Elsie am dritten Abend gesagt, während ihr Blick aus dem Fenster hin zur verschneiten Landschaft geglitten war. “Ich hab Angst, dass man uns hier findet.”

Der Russe gab ein schweres Seufzen von sich, legte noch den letzten Holzscheit für den Ofen nach und trat dann zu ihr, setzte sich neben sie auf die Fensterbank und griff nach ihrer Hand, strich mit dem Daumen über ihre weiche Haut, ehe er ihr ins Gesicht sah. Die Blonde hatte bereits vor ihrem Eintreffen an diesem Ort geäußert, dass sie nicht glaubte, dass dieser Ort eine dauerhafte Lösung war. Dass die Sicherheit, die Jascha hier empfand, trügerisch war und doch jemand auftauchen und das zerbrochene Fenster bemerken würde. Oder den Rauch, der aus dem Schornstein trat.  “Wir haben das doch schon besprochen”, redete Jascha mit ruhiger Stimme. “Die Chancen stehen verschwindend gering, dass es der GRU bis hierher schafft. Wir sind hier mitten im Nirgendwo, keiner hat uns gesehen, keine Behörde ist auf uns aufmerksam geworden. Ich glaube nicht, dass uns die Russen hier finden werden.” “Die Russen vielleicht nicht”, äußerte Elsie weiterhin ihre Sorge, die er ihr an den Augen ablesen konnte. “Aber Murphy schon.” Murphy. Eine weitere Komponente, die vor allem in ihrem Leben Angst und Schrecken verbreitet hatte und das bereits seit ihren frühen Kindertagen. Eine rätselhafte, mächtige Figur auf dem Schachbrett der Welt, der auf irgendeine Art und Weise in die träumerischen Fähigkeiten von Elsie involviert war. Auch wenn er bislang nach wie vor noch nicht verstanden hatte, welche Rolle der Schatten in ihrem Leben genau spielte. 

Er beließ es bei dem Thema, ein weiterer schweigsamer Abend, an dem sich die beiden still und jeder für sich selbst an das erinnerten, was ihnen widerfahren war, bevor sie beide ins Bett gingen, um sich Arm in Arm in süßem Schlummer dem Vergessen hinzugeben. Doch von langer Dauer waren die Stunden des Nichts nicht. Dann schreckte Jascha aus dem Schlaf und saß kerzengerade im Bett. Geweckt von irgendeinem Geräusch, das er nicht zuordnen konnte. Etwas Schrilles, Kurzweiliges, doch es hatte ausgereicht, um ihn zu wecken, der ohnehin einen leichten Schlaf hatte. Als er neben sich blickte, lag Elsie ruhig im Bett, die Augen geschlossen und friedlich schlummernd, während er selbst schlaftrunken versuchte zu filtern, was er eben gehört. Zunächst hatte er geglaubt, dass es vielleicht doch nur in seiner Einbildung da gewesen war, ein Streich seiner Sinne, wenn man in diesem Zwischenzustand von Wachsein und Schlaf war, doch dann ertönte es erneut. Ein deutliches, glockenklares, aber doch durch die Zimmertür gedämpftes Pling. Elsie neben ihm rührte sich nach wie vor nicht, atmete ruhig weiter, sodass er sich nur kurz nach vorne beugte, um ihr einen Kuss aufs Haupt zu drücken, sie wieder ordentlich zudeckte und dann so wie er gerade war aufstand, um nachzusehen, woher das nächtliche und ungewohnte Geräusch kam. Etwas trieb ihn dazu, ohne dass er bewusst wahrnahm, was es war. Vielleicht die Sorge, dass Elsie recht behielt und sie hier doch nicht so sicher waren, wie sie es sich wünschten.  Doch als er hinaus auf den Flur trat begrüßte ihn dort niemand. Nur ein Schimmern in der Dunkelheit, das sich recht schnell als die Anzeige des altertümlichen Fahrstuhls am Ende des Gangs entpuppte. Sie hatten ihn nicht häufig benutzt, immerhin war das Treppenhaus direkt nebenan und sie befanden sich nur im ersten Stock. Vermutlich war es auch das erste Mal, dass Jascha diesem Teil überhaupt mehr als nur zwei Sekunden seiner Aufmerksamkeit schenkte. Denn diesmal blieb sein Blick an ihm haften. Besonders, als sich die leuchtende Anzeige bewegte und somit auch der Fahrstuhl. Vom Erdgeschoss ins vierte Obergeschoss, dann hielt er, es rumpelte und Jascha blieb wie erstarrt stehen. Gelähmt, abwartend und vollkommen irritiert. Jemand war eingestiegen. Doch wer kam mitten in der Nacht hierher und was hatte er im viertel Stock zu suchen?  Erneut setzte sich der Fahrstuhl in Bewegung, diesmal abwärts. Die Nadel der Anzeige ging zum dritten, zum zweiten und schließlich zum ersten Stock. Jascha glaubte, sein Herz setzte für einige Takte aus, als erneut das Anhaltegeräusch erklang und somit anzeigte, dass der Fahrstuhl erneut gehalten hatte. Hier. Direkt vor ihm.  Innerlich machte er sich bereit, zuzuschlagen, wer auch immer dort hinter der Tür stand, sollte er ihm nicht freundlich gesinnt sein. Er war unbewaffnet und wenn man sie hier tatsächlich gefunden hatte, war er so gut wie tot. Dennoch bewegte er sich nicht. Wissend, dass das kaum einen Unterschied machte. Wissend, dass er genug davon hatte, wegzulaufen. Vielleicht wäre sein Schicksal nun besiegelt. Innerlich machte er sich auf das Schlimmste gefasst und als sich die Türen des Fahrstuhls langsam öffneten war dort… nichts. Nur das Licht, das den Flur plötzlich erhellte und dadurch etwas in den Fokus der Aufmerksamkeit lenkte, das auf dem Boden lag. Ein Zettel, auf den irgendetwas gekritzelt war.  Irrationalerweise drehte sich Jascha um, so als fürchtete er, dass jemand hinter ihm stünde und die Sache mit dem Fahrstuhl reine Ablenkung war, um ihn hinterrücks zu ermorden. Doch dort war niemand, nur die angelehnte Tür, durch deren schmalen Spalt er das Bett sehen konnte, auf dem Elsie tief und fest schlief. Einen Moment lang hielt er noch inne, dann trat er nach vorne, hin zu den geöffneten Türen und trat ein, um den Zettel aufzuheben. 

T̴̝̙̅̆̈́̈́ͅh̸̗̠͓̭̭̰̺̬̗͗̓̔̂̀̑ͅě̴̡̢͕͕̬̰̀̌͋͌̉̏̕̕͜ÿ̴̢̗̲̤͎̱̉͗͗̇ ̶͇͔̦̹̲̫̼̎̿͘ā̶̡͈̤̩͐̀r̶̢̼̬͙̲͉͒̅͌̔ȩ̴̛̥͎̬̣̥͊̇̇͌ ̴̧̡͖͖̬̞̜̼̬͆̓͠a̶̼̳̪̩̦̬͎͖̽̈́̊͊͊̊̊͘l̸̦̬̝̟̭̝̀͋̽̌͘͠ḽ̷̢̘͖̯̤̟͌̌͘ ̸͚͇͍͍̬̦̅̂̓̐h̸̛̭͈̤́̋̓́̉̈́̎̾̚e̵̥̯͍̝̜̼̳̘̎̂̾̊̄̈̑̔̋͐ͅͅr̶̠͚̯̼̼̹͉͔̹̊́́̌ę̶̫̦͖̤̺̃͗͊̾̐́̓̈́.̷͈̫͉̣̂̃͌̔̾̋

Irritiert zog Jascha die Augen schmal. Sie sind alle hier? Was hatte das zu bedeuten? Doch noch ehe sich Jascha mit der Bedeutung des Satzes auseinandersetzen könnte, schlossen sich mit einem Mal die Fahrstuhltüren hinter ihm. Schnell wandte er sich um, wollte noch aussteigen und klemmte sich dabei fast die Hand in der Tür ein, bevor er sie reflexartig zurückziehen musste. Und ohne sein Zutun setzte sich der Fahrstuhl wieder in Bewegung. Weiter hinab ins Erdgeschoss, in den Keller und auch da blieb er nicht stehen, sondern bewegte sich weiter abwärts, bis erneut ein deutliches Pling ertönte und sich die Türen wieder öffneten. Jascha war ganz perplex, hielt noch immer den Zettel in der Hand und die Irritation löste sich noch immer nicht, als er in einen leeren Korridor blickte, der eigentlich genauso aussah wie die Restlichen im Hotel. Stimmte etwas mit der Fahrstuhlanzeige nicht? Sie konnten unmöglich bis unter den Keller gefahren sein. Auch hier hörte er noch immer den Wind von außen, der an den Fensterläden rüttelte. Und er staunte nicht schlecht, als da erneut eine Notiz lag. Direkt vor seinen Fußen vor dem Fahrstuhl.  Nur langsam beugte er sich hinab und hob den Zettel auf, der ebenso zerknüllt und undeutlich aussah wie der Erste. 

Ȩ̴̡̤͎͂l̶̗͉̪͎̜̉̆͌ͅi̵̢̠̙̋͋̀̈̈́̀̕ź̶̧̛̫̳̝͇̭̗̃̅̾̑̈͘̚͜͠å̴͈̖b̸̮̹̜͋̿ȇ̷̢̨̧̨̻̙͕͕͚̪̑̌̅͌͋̕̕t̸̢̮̟͚̓̎̔̂̈̿h̴̤̜̠͐͂̾̌͆͆̚,̷̢̝̼̆̑̈ ̷̪̼̲͚̥̱͉͇͇̈́̔̐͆͊̌y̵̲͖̖͚͕̪̬̪͇̒̑̄͂̾̾̄̌̍͋o̵͚̒͊̂̔̓͌͒̔́ų̷̥̮͍̬̯̩͈̍ ̷̝͂͒̒͌̈́ņ̵̞͉͕̭̖̺͍̰̚e̶̡̙̼͋͐̈́̔̎̑̃̓͘̚͜e̵̲͇̗̬̪̔̅̌̎̄̓̃́͘͜d̴̻̰̬͉̼̬͕͒͌̊̐̀͑̓̆͘ ̶̞̫̜̃t̴̻͆̋̅̍͌̀̎̌ó̴̖̳̰̗̻̘͚̠̰̍̎̊̇̆́̀̚ ̸̡̨̲̂̄̀̿̄͐̚ĺ̸̬̎́̈̒̓̿͝ͅe̷̡͍̥͋̉͛̚ä̸̮̦͈̠͙̳̳̖̟͇́͂́̎̈́̎̽̿̐̈́v̵̡̱͉̒̇̓̉e̴̖̖̮̬̕̚͝.̶̨̺̪̰̫̮̈̓

Erlaubte sich da jemand einen Scherz mit ihm?  Erneut hob er den Zettel auf. Erneut fragte er sich, was zur Hölle hier eigentlich gespielt wurde. Doch eine Antwort bekam er nicht. Hatte er bis eben noch daran geglaubt, dass hier Menschen aus Fleisch und Blut ihre Hände im Spiel hatten, änderte sich das prompt, als er aufsah und vor sich in den Spiegel blickte, der direkt gegenüber vom Fahrstuhl stand und dort statt sich selbst eine andere Gestalt sah. Eine mit langen, dunklen Haaren, einer dicken Jacke, die einen Großteil ihrer Figur verhüllte, jedoch nicht den geschockten Ausdruck aus ihrem Gesicht. Eine rote Flüssigkeit ergoss sich von ihren Füßen ausgehend auf dem Boden, schien über die Schwelle des Spiegels zu kriechen und tränkte nun auch den Teppich der realen Welt. Das Bild, das so plötzlich und unheilvoll vor ihm aufgetaucht war, erschreckte ihn so sehr, dass er automatisch nach hinten stolperte. Wieder zurück in den Fahrstuhl, dessen Türen sich prompt schlossen und ihn erneut weiter abwärts fahren ließen, diesmal schneller, ruckeliger, was seinem ohnehin bereits rasendem Herz keine Ruhe bescherte. 

War das ein Alptraum? Schon zwei Mal war er in der Welt der eigenen Träume gefangen gewesen, eingesperrt in seinem eigenen Kopf, beide Male durch direktes oder indirektes Zutun von Elsie. Doch sie hatte ihm versprochen, dass sie das nie wieder tun würde. Nie wieder würde sie ihm das antun, was ihn beide Male schon beinahe in den Wahnsinn getrieben hätte und er konnte ihr doch vertrauen. Sie wusste, was sich für Dinge in seinem Kopf abspielten. Es konnte also nicht sein, dass er das träumte. Doch was war das hier dann? Die Anzeige spielte verrückt, der Fahrstuhl wurde langsam und hielt schließlich an, sodass sich die Türen erneut öffneten, sodass sein Blick auf eine spiegelglatte Wasseroberfläche traf, dessen leises, plätscherndes Geräusch von dunklen Betonwänden widerhallte. Und als Jascha einen leeren Stuhl mittendrin stehen sah, neben dem ein weiterer Eimer mit Wasser stand, wusste er, dass er nicht mehr länger im Overlook Hotel war und dass er diesen Ort schon einmal betreten hatte. Nur war da diesmal anstelle einer blonden Frau wieder ein Zettel auf dem Stuhl.  Alles in ihm sträubte sich dagegen, den Raum zu betreten, in dem Folter und Terror stattgefunden hatte. Mehr für eine ihm damals noch Fremde, als für ihn, der erst der Terrorbringer gewesen war. Und das alleine aus dem Grund, dass ihre jeweiligen Regierungen im Untergrund einen Krieg führten. Einen, den Männer wie er an Frauen wie ihr ausgeübt hatten. Und doch siegte die Neugierde oder vielmehr ein unbewusster Drang, der ihn dazu trieb auch diesmal aus dem Fahrstuhl zu treten, hin zu dem Zettel und zu lesen, was jemand darauf gekritzelt hatte. 

‚̸̡̱̝̚K̶͕̅͒̏͂͋̓͠ṅ̴̼͚̟͙̤̞͕̙̑̌͂̒͘ĕ̶̗̞͎̯e̷̡̛̗̺̞͕̳͎̗̻͂̓́̎̔͂̎-̸̢͔̖̳̭̇̓̌d̴͍̮̟̺̎̂ȩ̸̼͉̼̪͔̯̉͋̉́̏͜͝͝͝e̶̪̱̺̓́͆͌̅p̶͇̹̥̦͚̱̥̱̥̈͌̓́͠͝ ̸͚̮̱̘͖͂̕͝i̶̳̠̣̹̪̘͗͒͒̿͜͝n̴̨̢̥̜̠̻̹̊̑̃̉̐͒́͘̕͠ͅ ̴̡͈͕̓̾͆͝f̵̘̳̭̦̹̽͛͋ļ̵̞̘͍͚̙̻̊̊͋͂̉͂̈́̊͜͠ơ̷̛͇̫̊͋͝w̶̱̑̑̏͘͝é̴̙̺̰̙̟͇̜͖̪̎͌̈́͐̓r̸̰̘̲̀͑s̷̢̛͈̞͖̫̥̟͚̲͋͂̾̈́̌͗̈́͐ ̸̨͖͐̊w̷̨̳̼̳̣͓̜̱̆̕è̸͙̹̺͓̞̠̫̙̿̏̓͂̒̎͘'̷̭̎̈́̎̈́̄͆̄̅͐̓l̷̡̛͍̪̬ļ̸͕̳̻̻̓̀̈́̇̂͌͌̽̉ ̷̗̜̼̻̳̗͉̯͉̾̀͋͒̉s̴̛̻͎͕͗̇̽̔̇̊͘͠t̸̨̝̞͔̤̦͍̞̹͐͜r̸̢̨͙̯̥͔̞̒̎͗ã̵̛̖͝ỵ̴̬̖̜̣̯̼̎̾̌́̔̑͝ͅ,̵̨̡̥̠̿̃ ̶̧̟́͋̌͝w̴̗̘̦̩͚̓̎͊̒̃͐͝ë̶̗͚̙̬̣͉̳͙͖̊͗̉′̶̱̘̹̙̳͇͙͍̓̔̃̓͊̓̂̇͑͠l̷̮͕̼̰̘̼̝͕̐̋̒̐̓͘͜l̴̩̘͎̯̤͚̙͉̒̌��͘ ̷͖͗͊̈́̊͌̃̚k̷̗̎̉̑é̶͇̳̹̥́̈́ě̶̱̉̊͌̏̏̑̾͑̚p̸̙̌̓̐̆̓͆͒͋̚͠ͅ ̸̱̹̖͇͑̅̅̀̄̾ͅẗ̶̨̈́̔̋͂̆̐h̷͚̙͕̋̊͝ḛ̶̛͚̹̞͓̱͕̙͕ ̵͖͖̟̀̋̓͘s̵̘͕̄̇̅̚͜͝h̶̢̛͖̠̻̦͇̰̊͗̈́͛̍ŏ̴̹͖̻̫w̵̥̹͎̲̞̣̗̏͜ḙ̶̡͇̗̄́͐̈͒͑ͅr̴̲̻͙̩͂͗̈́͊̓̕͝s̷͖̻̯̻̀̎͂̋͗͘ ̵̮̰̯͇͊̈́̈́̒̏͂̆̆͘a̵̫̙͙̯̠̤̼̗͊̅̍͊̾͒̃̒͘w̴̗̖͙͇̠̘̔́̂͂̂ͅȃ̶̲̩̠̓͛̀̑̊͘͘͝ÿ̶̘́͋̆̈͒͆̀̍.̶̖̤̞̼̺̲̤̱̫̽̍͋̌̈̓͒̾̃

Schon wieder konnte er sich keinen Reim darauf machen und auch jetzt hatte er keine Zeit, um sich weiter mit jenen seltsamen Gegebenheiten auseinander zu setzen. Denn mit einem Mal wurde ihm ein in Wasser getränkter Lappen aufs Gesicht gedrückt und er selbst gepackt. Und egal, wie sehr er sich auch dagegen wehrte, den Kopf drehte und zu versuchen der luftraubenden Falle zu entrinnen, der Griff blieb eisern und die damit entstandene Schlinge um seinen Hals zog sich immer fester zu. Er spürte, wie er zurückgezerrt wurde, während er Wasser schluckte, hustete, um dann erneut Wasser anzuatmen, bis es urplötzlich aufhörte und er um sich herum wieder die Lichter des Fahrstuhls sah, während sich die Türen vor ihm schlossen. Jascha atmete schwer, lehnte sich an die Wand hinter ihm und sah hinab zu der weiteren Notiz, die er in seiner Panik halb zerknüllt hatte. Sein Herz raste, sein Verstand lief Amok und konnte gar nicht greifen, was hier überhaupt geschah. Und als sich zum dritten Mal die Fahrstuhltüren mit jenem ikonischen Geräusch öffneten, zögerte er am längsten.  Vor ihm erstreckte sich die Nacht, eingerahmt durch hohe Hecken, die aussahen wie das Labyrinth, das sich unweit des Hotels befand. Der Wind heulte und der Schnee auf dem Boden wirkten genauso, wie er diesen Ort zuletzt gesehen hatte, als er abends aus dem Fenster gesehen hatte. Vielleicht war das ein Ausgang… oder eine Falle.  Der Fahrstuhl bewegte sich nicht mehr. Die Türen blieben offen, sodass das gelbe, warme Licht den unmittelbaren Bereich davor erhellte. Es gab also kein Zurück. Er musste aussteigen. Auch wenn er das Gefühl hatte, dass das eine schlechte Idee war. 

Der Schnee fühlte sich kalt an unter seinen nackten Füßen und er begann recht schnell zu zittern, als die winterlichen Temperaturen ihn einnahmen. Dennoch lief er weiter, obwohl sich die Kälte bald wie Nadelstiche auf seinen Fußflächen anfühlten. Jascha schlang die Arme um seinen Oberkörper, auch wenn das kaum Abhilfe verschaffte. Ein weiterer Zettel lag im Schnee, teilweise bereits durchnässt und angefroren. Einen Moment lang hielt er inne, dann hob er ihn auf, in der Hoffnung dann wieder zurück in den Fahrstuhl zu steigen, um der Kälte zu entkommen. 

Ȩ̵̬͇̫̞͆̊l̷̡͎̠̖̺̻̻͈̺͆͌̂͛̾̄��͝͝ĩ̶͙͉̩̲̦͖̯͑̇͑̽͗͛̌͒͝j̸͉͙͋̄̄͊̿͒͌̕a̸̢͔͕͍̯̯͉̖͊̃͘ͅḩ̸̢̤̦̮̲̤̰̓̍͠͝,̶̨̮̩̩͋̋ ̴̘̫̱̙̈́I̵̪͎͂̎͠ ̶̭̏͑͆́̎̀d̴̨̠̤̜͕͉͍̮̪̤͗̒̀̈́̈́̓̉̊͝͝o̷̭͇̒̓͌͗̿͑͆͌̇n̶̛̯̠͛͒̑̌̉̀͝’̷̨̧̰͓̓̿͂̉͜͠t̸͚̠͚̼̣̥̏̈͑̾̍͋ ̸̖̖͙̄͋̓͋̚͝k̵̨̹͙̫͍̖̟̅̀͂͒̉͠ǹ̴̢̝̖͉̲͚̯̖͗̎̃͛̊o̵̧͔̪̿̔̆͒͊̍̇̉̔͠ẁ̷̹͕̫̠͓̘͎͑͛͗̑̅ ̵̢̲̜̣͚̿̽̂̈́̏̎̚w̵̩̖͎̥̥͐̌̎͗̕h̸̭̺̄̐́̓̓͑e̶͖̳͇͛̓̄̽̉͑̓̈́͊͌r̶̡͔̰͉͈̈́͗̈e̷̹͉̽͂́̿͋̓̄̀̚͝ ̴̡̢͓̙͈͔̺̯̞̰̒̔̋́̑̓Ị̷̻̺̹̫̝̜̯͇̎̂̽͂͒̂̇͝ ̶̢̜͓͑͋͝a̶̡̛͓̙̞̺͚͍̺̜̋̍̈͐̐̍̇͐̿m̷̨̙͔̈́́̈ͅ.̵̡̧̼̝͙̘̹͊̓̀̑́͋̉͠͠͝ ̶̯̩̫̘͌͒̒̉͑̏͗I̸̱̫͕͙͉̥̣̗̋͌͜’̴̨̛͕̺̘̩̞͔̙͒̑̊͆̓̌͑m̸̲͈͔͔͍̗̪̂̍̀̍̓ ̷̧̟̠̙̹̝͇͑̈̊͑̇̆͛́̚ͅs̴̲͇̞̔̾͐c̴̩͕͚̗͙̤͗͑̔͝͝a̶̜͇̫̣̭̯̋̎̊̆̒̐͝ṙ̵͓͚̙͕̝͉͖͕̪ě̸̢͙͍̤́͂͊͛̊͠d̶̮̀́̇̎̉ͅ.̴̙̯̥̖̘̩̱̝̳̦̎́̈́̀́̍͗̓͝

Angst. Spürte er sie auch? Hatte er nach allem, was ihm widerfahren war überhaupt noch wirkliche Angst um sich selbst? Diese Nachrichten, die er gefunden hatten klangen alle nach Menschen, die sich in der Dunkelheit nach etwas Licht gesehnt hatten. Als wären sie davon verschlungen worden und auch er verspürte Furcht. Jedoch nicht um sich selbst. Er konnte nur an Elsie denken, die noch immer in diesem Haus war und daran, dass er zu ihr musste. Doch was ihn selbst betraf, war da nichts dergleichen. Da war nur eine gewisse Akzeptanz, eine Gleichgültigkeit, nachdem er die letzte Nachricht gelesen und sich wieder umgedreht hatte.  Der Fahrstuhl, er war weg. Verschwunden. Vor ihm war nur eine weite Schneefläche und keine Spur vom Overlook Hotel oder irgendetwas, das darauf hinwies. Die Eiseskälte zehrte mittlerweile an seinen Kräften, kroch in seine Extremitäten und schien ihn zu lähmen, seine Finger konnte er kaum noch krümmen, jeder Schritt fiel ihm unglaublich schwer. Seine Lippen waren blau und er vollkommen ausgelaugt. Er schaffte noch drei Schritte, dann brach er hinab auf die Knie und blickte vor sich in den Schnee, der immer wieder von roten Linien durchbrochen war. Von Blut. Blut, das jemand genutzt hatte, um Namen ins Weiß zu schreiben. 

Isaiah. 

Liz. 

Ana. 

Pavel. 

Elijah. 

Würde er der nächste Name sein, der sich im Schnee wiederfand? 

Schwerfällig hob Jascha den Blick, als sich ein Schatten vor ihm auftat. Er wuchs und wurde größer, bildete Gliedmaßen und einen Kopf, der ohne Gesicht blieb. Eine rauchige, düstere Gestalt, die nun ihre langen Finger nach ihm ausstreckte, während der Wind um ihn her heulte und ihm den Schnee in die Augen trieb, sodass er sie schließlich schloss, innerlich ahnend, was nun folgen würde. 

“Elsie”, murmelte er noch leise, bevor ihn die Finsternis gänzlich einhüllte. “Du musst aufwachen.” 

tagged by: @thisis-elijah and @heartofglass-mindofstone tagging: all of my mates had been tagged yet, I think. So feel free if you wanna to his muse game! But I wanna do a big shoutout to @thisis-elijah , @ausgetrieben and @heartofglass-mindofstone , who literally gave me the inspo for this writing prompt.

[thekingofworems]

what if Frankenstein’s creature felt more like a woman. What if they liked more to wear dresses and spinny skirts and style their hair in fancy buns and curls. Trans woman Creechur.

OMFGGG I SEE THE VISION I SEE THE VISION

👀👀👀👀👀

Nodding and looking at this with my big brown autistic eyes

Personally I headcanon Jascha as genderqueer with more masc/androgynous gender preferences, but I definitely love the idea of this large, freaky homunculus and then it's like "flowy... look look the dress spins :D" LIKE DJJHDJJD THAT'S ADORABLE??? Plus he absolutely deserves to get flowers n shit braided in his hair I'D LOVE THAT FOR THEMMM

Yknowwww you could go say a lil hihi howdy how are ya to my interpretation of the Creechur on the ask blog BUT HEY NO PRESSURE /lh /nf

HEADS UPPP finna yap yap yap abt a cool Frankenstein au fanfic I take inspiration from for my take on Adam. If you don't care feel free to skip!!! Mwah mwah mwah love you<3

Btw if u want an awesome, sorta modern Frankenstein university au fic I HIGHLYYYY recommend Song Of Myself on AO3!!! It's a slowww burn and it's like 40 chapters long BUT IT'S AWESOMEEE, instead of Adam, Creech is Jascha because this fic plays into the trope of the creature having memories from the body parts of the people he's made from BUTTT i think it's awesome cuz there's only one person (aside from a few adjustments) that's used to create Jascha. No spoilers, but basically the og person's legs were destroyed, and because Jascha has the person's memories, he has phantom pains, needs to get used to having a mostly different body, etc.

It's a pretty cool take imo, and each chapter is told through Victor, Henry, and Jascha's POVs in that order!! There's an interesting take on Victor, giving him a/a few types of mood disorders. Idr if they were specified BUT YEAHHH😋 I love this fic with all my heart and I need more people to know abt it lmaooo

TOODLESSS

[phasmophobie]

📜 (komplette Truppe)

elijah: Croissants: dropped

elsie: Road: works ahead

daria: BBQ sauce: on my titties

pavel: Shavacado: fre

jascha: Miss Keisha: fuckin dead

lily:

lily, grumpy: I didn’t understand a single word of that and I hate every single one of you.

(the first prompt has Vines-Compilations energy and i'm in tears)

elijah: If you bite it and you die, it’s poisonous. If it bites you and you die, it’s venomous.

daria: What if it bites me and it dies!?

elsie: Then you’re poisonous. Jesus Christ, Daria, learn to listen.

lily: What if it bites itself and I die?

pavel: That’s voodoo.

jascha: What if it bites me and someone else dies?

elsie: That’s correlation, not causation.

pavel: What if we bite each other, and neither of us die? :)

daria: That’s kinky.

elijah: Oh my God.

(this feels like a real convo, oof)

*Everyone is standing around the broken coffee maker*

elijah: So. Who broke it? I'm not mad, I just wanna know.

elsie: ...I did. I broke it.

elijah: No. No you didn't. Daria?

daria: Don't look at me. Look at Pavel.

pavel: What?! I didn't break it.

daria: Huh, that's weird. How'd you even know it was broken?

pavel: Because it's sitting right in front of us and it's broken.

daria: Suspicious.

pavel: No, it's not!

jascha: If it matters, probably not, but Lily was the last one to use it.

lily: Liar! I don't even drink that crap!

jascha: Oh really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?

lily: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that, jascha!

elsie: Okay let's not fight. I broke it. Let me pay for it, Elijah.

elijah: No! Who broke it!?

jascha: Elijah... Daria's been awfully quiet.

daria: rEALLY?!

*Everyone starts arguing*

elijah, being interviewed: I broke it. I burned my hand so I punched it.

elijah: I predict 10 minutes from now they'll be at each other's throats with warpaint on their faces and a pig head on a stick.

elijah:

elijah: Good. It was getting a little chummy around here.

(... pretty sure this already happened.)

[cartridgeconverter]

My life goal is to have a poster of Jascha Heifetz on my bedroom wall that I can look at sadly whenever I play bad like the guy from Whiplash with Buddy Rich

[beardedmrbean]

Nation of Islam leader Louis Farrakhan, who for decades has spouted off about “Satanic” Jews who control the government and Hollywood and once called Hitler a “great man” — is claiming his venomous reputation is a “false narrative” pushed by the Anti-Defamation League.

Farrakhan, 90, has filed a $4.8 billion Manhattan Federal Court lawsuit against the civil rights group, accusing it of interfering with his First Amendment rights by wrongly labeling him an antisemite.

“This lawsuit is to ensure that the abuse, misuse, and false use of the terms ‘anti-Semite,’ ‘anti-Semitic,’ and ‘antisemitism,’ as falsely charged by the [ADL] is permanently barred from being a tool to defame [Farrakhan and the Nation of Islam] and stifle the exercise of constitutional rights,”‘ he contends in court papers.

Farrakhan contended he “has never harmed a hair on the head of any Jewish person or even advocated for such,” and boasted he “honors, respects, and even admires many members of the Jewish community, including his boyhood idol and one of the greatest violinists, Jascha Heifetz, who was a Russian Jew, and his own Jewish violin teachers.”

He called his contentious relationship with the ADL a “battle of Biblical proportions” and buttressed his court filing with 787 pages of “supporting” documents.

Farrakhan has referred to Jews as “termites;” allegedly called Judaism a “gutter religion,” and proclaimed “the powerful Jews are my enemy.”

“The Jews have been so bad at politics they lost half their population in the Holocaust,” he said during a 1998 speech.

“Jews are responsible for all this filth and degenerate behavior that Hollywood is putting out: turning men into women, and women into men,” he said more recently, in 2018.

The Anti-Defamation League is “an unAmerican organization and has woven itself into the fabric of both the United States government, in general, and into local governments within America, in particular, to advance interests that are unAmerican to the extent that it tramples and trammels upon the Constitutional rights of Minister Farrakhan and American citizens,” he said in the lawsuit.

The dispute began in 1984, according to Farrakhan, when he supported then-presidential candidate Jesse Jackson after he was accused of referring to Jews with a racial slur.

“It is because of Minister Farrakhan’s unwavering defense of himself and Reverend Jackson that the ADL began plastering him with the false and injurious label of ‘anti- Semite,'” Farrakhan said in court papers.

While the ADL typically doesn’t comment on litigation, Director Jonathan Greenblatt told The Post the suit “has no merit.

“Louis Farrakhan is an antisemite. One need look no further than his own words and statements to come away with the same conclusion,” he said.

Lawyers for Farrakhan did not immediately return a message seeking comment. ______________

Quoting you directly and with context isn't defamation my dude. Even the splc has you on their list.

[spatsandcravats]

Hm. I gotta decide what kind of smocking pattern I wanna do for Jascha's coat (probably the simple braid bc I can do it nicely and it doesn't look too bad if it gets squished over time) and I gotta find a white gel pen to mark the fabric

[jhavelikes]

Have you ever done a dense grid search over neural network hyperparameters? Like a *really dense* grid search? It looks like this (!!). Blueish colors correspond to hyperparameters for which training converges, redish colors to hyperparameters for which training diverges.

(10) Jascha Sohl-Dickstein on X: "Have you ever done a dense grid search over neural network hyperparameters? Like a *really dense* grid search? It looks like this (!!). Blueish colors correspond to hyperparameters for which training converges, redish colors to hyperparameters for which training diverges. https://t.co/yqJlschvVK" / X

[footy-fictionist]

This is it - Julian Brandt

Pairing: Julian Brandt x female Schlotterbeck reader, Nico Schlotterbeck x sister reader, Karim Adeyemi x ex-girlfriend reader

Warnings: fluff, nervousness, some awkwardness, bit of jealous Julian, hurting a little bit, Jule's yellow card

Word count: 1737

Note: As always, English is not my first language. This is the third part of my Julian series. Is this it? and This might be it are the first two parts. I don't know any of the players personally. This is completely fictional. Please do not copy or publish my work, reblogging is fine. (I also just have to mention how good Julian looks in this gif!!!)

The game against Leipzig is supposed to be an intense one and she just can’t sit still. It didn’t help that she is being watched by both of Julian’s brothers and Karim’s family. She doesn’t know what they are thinking, but she can only hope there won’t be a confrontation. Before the game she managed to share a look with Julian, she didn’t dare do more than smile at him. Both the eyes on her back and the way that Karim was beside Julian, made her a little nervous. She’s not sure Karim saw her and she shouldn’t care because she doesn’t love him anymore. And still it makes her nervous.

She jumps a little when just before kick off, someone sits beside her. When she looks to her right, she locks eyes with Karim. Since she didn’t really keep up with everything anymore, she missed that he was injured. She only noticed when he walked onto the field with Julian in his normal clothes. She looks away from him and shifts a little uneasily. He doesn’t say anything at first and honestly, she has no clue what to say to him either. She hasn’t seen him in months and the last time they talked, she broke up with him for cheating on her. 

He doesn't say anything at first, he just looks her over. She knows he's trying to discover how she's feeling based on her body language. She's pretty sure he sees that she's nervous. But she doesn't respond to it and focuses on the game. Julian is running around the pitch with quite a bit of speed. Getting passes in through any opening he sees. It makes her proud that he's doing so well. But then someone else sits on her other side. Or should she say two people take to her left side. Julian's younger brothers have taken a seat on her left side. She's not sure why, she's never spoken to them before. But somehow she thinks that they're now sitting next to her for back up, just in case. So she smiles at both of the boys, who smile back at her warmly. 

"So you've decided to get into football again?" It's more of a rhetorical question but she answers it anyway.

"I've always been into football. I've seen all of Nico's games." 

"You know that's not what I mean. So, you and Brandt huh. How did that happen?" 

"Not that it should matter to you, but I bumped into him a few weeks ago. We've been close ever since. I hadn't seen him in months since I cut everyone off after breaking up with you for cheating on me."

She knew she was being very straightforward and maybe even a little harsh. Karim flinched a little when she mentioned the break up. He purses his lips a little as he looks back at the field. And just then Julian scores a goal and it's a beautiful one at that. She immediately jumps up to cheer, his younger brothers cheering with her and even giving her a hug. But during the hug there is the announcement that the goal has been ruled out by VAR. But before she pulls away, Jannis whispers something in her ear.

"If you need us to help or intervene, just squeeze my arm a little and we'll help."

She softly thanks him and then pulls back to sit back down. Karim is watching her again, but he doesn't really say anything else. During the rest of the first half, Karim is silent and she doesn't make an effort to talk to him. She does talk to Jannis and Jascha though. During the first half Marco Reus is given a penalty, which he scores and soon after Emre Can makes a beautiful goal! When it's halftime, she sees Julian look up at her in the stands and he smiles. She smiles back but when he looks to the side, his smile leaves. She knows he sees Karim and she wishes she could just reassure him.

She gets up to use the restroom. Once there she also takes the time to take a deep breath. As she walks out, she finds Karim leaning against the wall opposite the restroom. She wants to walk away when he softly grabs her by the elbow. She halts in her steps, but doesn't do much else. She knows he wants her to turn around, but she doesn't until he asks her to. As she turns to him, she sees the almost sad look in his eyes.

"Does he make you happy?" She's a little confused as to why he's asking, but she confirms that Julian makes her happy. 

He heaves a big sigh. "Then I won't intervene. I wanted to tell you for so long that I still love you, but I understand that I hurt you way too much and that Julian makes you happy. Would it be okay for us to be friends? Maybe not immediately but over time?"

She doesn't know why but she's a little surprised. She didn't think Karim loved her anymore, not after the cheating. But she sees how sorry he is and the pain in his eyes. So she agrees, she tells him that they won't go to immediate friends and that she's willing to give him time to get over her. They walk back to their seats, talking about the last few months. Jannis and Jascha give her a questioning look and she lets them know everything is okay. As the second half starts, they see a bit of change in Julian. He plays a bit more fiercely than the first half and that's proven when he gets a yellow card. Which is quite surprising because he usually doesn't get a card often. She's a little worried it has to do with her and Karim. She can confirm it when he looks their way right after the card.

Julian sees her worried looks, but doesn't take it as concern. He sees it as disappointment and drops his head down. He can't believe he let the emotions get to him, when he knows she'd never take Karim back. He tries to play like he did in the first half, tries to score again, but it isn't working in his favour. In the 74th minute they concede a goal and Julian is cursing the way he plays. And about 10 minutes later he is subbed off. He doesn't even dare look up at the stands. 

She keeps glancing at the bench and the field. Nico is still on the field defending and he's definitely saved the team with his shoulder. But she worries about Julian. Karim had gone to stand a bit closer to the field and that way she could finally introduce herself formally to Jannis and Jascha. But Karim isn’t that far away so she definitely hears Karim's scream of 'FÜNF' when he hears the amount of added time. It makes her laugh for sure, but doesn't completely take away her worries. 

"Will he be okay?" She asks Jannis the question that's been plaguing her mind.

"He'll be fine. I'm sure he's worried about you, like you are about him.”

Jannis’ words comforted her a little. When the final whistle sounded, she saw Julian get back on the field to thank the fans for the support. In the meantime she decided to head to the tunnel to meet him there once he gets off the field. After a few minutes a few players come down the tunnel. Nico is one of them and she immediately congratulates him. He gives her a hug and a kiss on the forehead before heading to the changing room. It took Julian a little longer to walk down the tunnel. It takes him a minute to spot her and when he does, he grimaces. She doesn’t know why that is, but she approaches him anyway. She goes to wrap her arms around his neck, but he dodges her hug. She immediately intertwines her fingers and pulls her arms closer to her. She knows she can’t hide the hurt look on her face and when he looks at her face he notices. His face drops when he sees it and he immediately goes to wrap his arms around her waist, but this time she steps back.

“I’m sorry. I’m ashamed. My goal didn’t count and then I saw you with Karim and jealousy completely took over and then I got that yellow in the second half and continued to play bad whilst you were here for me. And now I’m already hurting you and you haven’t even been my girlfriend for 24 hours.”

Julian goes to continue his rambling when she goes to wrap her arms around his neck again. He immediately stops talking and wraps his arms around her waist, pulling her as close to him as he can. She kisses his cheek and runs her hand through the strands of his hair. They’re a little damp with sweat still, but she doesn’t care at all. All she wants to do is comfort him and show him that it’s alright. She clings to him just as much as he does to her.

“It’s okay. Everything between Karim and I is settled and there is absolutely nothing you have to worry about. You were brilliant today, it doesn’t matter if your goal counted or if you got a yellow card and didn’t play as well anymore. I’m yours and hopefully I’ll be yours for a long long time.” 

Julian pulls back a little, but he still has a tight hold on her waist. His eyes rake over her face and he sees no lies in them, just admiration. He puts his forehead on hers and she puts one of her hands on his jaw, the other still around his shoulders. She leans up slowly and presses a soft kiss to his lips. It’s their first kiss and honestly, it’s everything they both hoped for. They don’t notice anything but each other. They only pull away once they hear a lot of whistling. When Julian looks over her shoulder and she looks back, they find Nico, Jannis and Jascha laughing at them whilst whistling. Even Karim joins in. She turns back to Julian and presses another kiss on his lips. This is it, everything they both hoped for and probably more.

[jhave]

(10) Jascha Sohl-Dickstein on X: "Have you ever done a dense grid search over neural network hyperparameters? Like a *really dense* grid search? It looks like this (!!). Blueish colors correspond to hyperparameters for which training converges, redish colors to hyperparameters for which training diverges. https://t.co/yqJlschvVK" / X

[trauma-report]

📜 & Teo

Teo(7 years old, influenced by Kuz): .. .----. -- / ... --- .-. .-. -.-- [translation: I’M SORRY]

Jascha: What's that?

Teo (7 years old, influenced by Kuz): Remorse code.

Jascha: I'm even angrier now.

Jascha: You fuckers don’t know about my knife stick. It’s a knife taped to a stick and it’s the ultimate weapon.

Teo, 12 years old, not looking up from their book: Spear.

Jascha: BLOCKED.

[mixamorphosis]

Blog post and linked up tracklist [HERE]

Fake Glasses - Dancehall (Red Motorbike)

Oyama Edit - Ghost Guide (Most Excellent Unlimited)

Nots - Reactor (Mikey Young Remix) (Heavenly)

The Noodleman - Acid Ting (Red Motorbike)

Osmose - A Lonely Sound, Slowly Dying (Friendly Monster)

Bill Withers - Make A Smile For Me (Trishes Edit)

B-Jam - Later (Midnight Riot)

Boule Noir - Aimes-tu a Vie Comme Moi (Noodleman Rework)

Paul Hardcastle - Still Thinking About You (Bydesign Edit)

Minnie Riperton - Inside My Love (Late Nite Tuff Guy Edit)

BB King - Thrill Is Gone (Rock n Rolla Soundsystem Edit)

Jona Saucedo - Look At Me

Red Hot Chilli Peppers - Under The Bridge (Dynamicron Edit)

Rhythm Heritage - Barettas Theme (Jack Sparrow Edit)

Talk Talk - Life's What You Make It (The Starkiller Space Remix)

Astrodynamics - Acela (Baltimore Version) (Vielspaß)

Mugwump - Until You're Worth It (Andrew Weatherall Mix) (Subfield)

Jascha Hagen - Early In The Morning (Luettje Luise)

Seahawks - Islands (No Man Is Mix) (Ocean Moon)

Eddie Hazel - California Dreamin' (Be With)

Bella Figura - Better Man (Craig Bratley Remix) (Claremont 56)

Download available via [Hearthis]

[gouldblogger]

Jascha Heifetz looking absolutely iconic in a Kimono, 1917

[taken from Library of Congress]

[jcmarchi]

Physical Constraints Drive Evolution of Brain-Like AI

New Post has been published on https://thedigitalinsider.com/physical-constraints-drive-evolution-of-brain-like-ai/

Physical Constraints Drive Evolution of Brain-Like AI

In a groundbreaking study, Cambridge scientists have taken a novel approach to artificial intelligence, demonstrating how physical constraints can profoundly influence the development of an AI system.

This research, reminiscent of the developmental and operational constraints of the human brain, offers new insights into the evolution of complex neural systems. By integrating these constraints, the AI not only mirrors aspects of human intelligence but also unravels the intricate balance between resource expenditure and information processing efficiency.

The Concept of Physical Constraints in AI

The human brain, an epitome of natural neural networks, evolves and operates within a myriad of physical and biological constraints. These limitations are not hindrances but are instrumental in shaping its structure and function. I

n the words of Jascha Achterberg, a Gates Scholar from the Medical Research Council Cognition and Brain Sciences Unit (MRC CBSU) at the University of Cambridge, “Not only is the brain great at solving complex problems, it does so while using very little energy. In our new work, we show that considering the brain’s problem-solving abilities alongside its goal of spending as few resources as possible can help us understand why brains look like they do.”

The Experiment and Its Significance

The Cambridge team embarked on an ambitious project to create an artificial system that models a highly simplified version of the brain. This system was distinct in its application of ‘physical’ constraints, much like those in the human brain.

Each computational node within the system was assigned a specific location in a virtual space, emulating the spatial organization of neurons. The greater the distance between two nodes, the more challenging their communication, mirroring the neuronal organization in human brains.

This virtual brain was then tasked with navigating a maze, a simplified version of the maze navigation tasks often given to animals in brain studies. The importance of this task lies in its requirement for the system to integrate multiple pieces of information—such as the start and end locations, and the intermediate steps—to find the shortest route. This task not only tests the system’s problem-solving abilities but also allows for the observation of how different nodes and clusters become critical at various stages of the task.

Learning and Adaptation in the AI System

The journey of the artificial system from novice to expert in maze navigation is a testament to the adaptability of AI. Initially, the system, akin to a human learning a new skill, struggled with the task, making numerous errors. However, through a process of trial and error and subsequent feedback, the system gradually refined its approach.

Crucially, this learning occurred through alterations in the strength of connections between its computational nodes, mirroring the synaptic plasticity observed in human brains. What’s particularly fascinating is how the physical constraints influenced this learning process. The difficulty in establishing connections between distant nodes meant the system had to find more efficient, localized solutions, thus imitating the energy and resource efficiency seen in biological brains.

Emerging Characteristics in the Artificial System

As the system evolved, it began to exhibit characteristics startlingly similar to those of the human brain. One such development was the formation of hubs – highly connected nodes acting as information conduits across the network, akin to neural hubs in the human brain.

More intriguing, however, was the shift in how individual nodes processed information. Instead of a rigid coding where each node was responsible for a specific aspect of the maze, the nodes adopted a flexible coding scheme. This meant that a single node could represent multiple aspects of the maze at different times, a feature reminiscent of the adaptive nature of neurons in complex organisms.

Professor Duncan Astle from Cambridge’s Department of Psychiatry highlighted this aspect, stating, “This simple constraint – it’s harder to wire nodes that are far apart – forces artificial systems to produce some quite complicated characteristics. Interestingly, they are characteristics shared by biological systems like the human brain.”

Broader Implications

The implications of this research extend far beyond the realms of artificial intelligence and into the understanding of human cognition itself. By replicating the constraints of the human brain in an AI system, researchers can gain invaluable insights into how these constraints shape brain organization and contribute to individual cognitive differences.

This approach provides a unique window into the complexities of the brain, particularly in understanding conditions that affect cognitive and mental health. Professor John Duncan from the MRC CBSU adds, “These artificial brains give us a way to understand the rich and bewildering data we see when the activity of real neurons is recorded in real brains.”

Future of AI Design

This groundbreaking research has significant implications for the future design of AI systems. The study vividly illustrates how incorporating biological principles, particularly those related to physical constraints, can lead to more efficient and adaptive artificial neural networks.

Dr. Danyal Akarca from the MRC CBSU underscores this, stating, “AI researchers are constantly trying to work out how to make complex, neural systems that can encode and perform in a flexible way that is efficient. To achieve this, we think that neurobiology will give us a lot of inspiration.”

Jascha Achterberg further elaborates on the potential of these findings for building AI systems that closely mimic human problem-solving abilities. He suggests that AI systems tackling challenges similar to those faced by humans will likely evolve structures resembling the human brain, particularly when operating within physical constraints like energy limitations. “Brains of robots that are deployed in the real physical world,” Achterberg explains, “are probably going to look more like our brains because they might face the same challenges as us.”

The research conducted by the Cambridge team marks a significant step in understanding the parallels between human neural systems and artificial intelligence. By imposing physical constraints on an AI system, they have not only replicated key characteristics of the human brain but also opened new avenues for designing more efficient and adaptable AI.