#jamie gets to spend the rest of his life with his doctor

[witchofthemidlands]

tales of the tardis is enough for me, it is, it really is, after all those years, jamie & zoe finally got their memories back & if that's the last we see of jamie mccrimmon that was fantastic, it was more than enough, there is & now will always be a conclusion

but

if i had to bring any classic who companion back to new (new?) who it would be jamie, it would always be jamie because the idea of jamie meeting a modern doctor sends me just a tad feral, just a a little bit balls to the wall feral.

[jamiesfootball]

🌷🌸🌹🌺💐🌷

some flowers for u when u need them <3

You told me to get back here and fix it. So here is a small scene from a sequel to last week's prompt for "Did it ever occur to you that maybe we don’t want to see you get hurt?”

Jamie shifted to block his path.

“Look, don't worry about me and the grouchy dick, alright? I just wanted to say sorry for before. At the hospital.” The distance on Sam's face softened into something Jamie could reach. Yet all his teammate said was, “That isn't necessary.” “No, see, 'cause it is. I mean, I don’t really remember what I did to set you off. Mostly I just remember some yelling. But if you can remind me what it was, I want to apologise for it proper- take accountability and make amends and all that, you know?” Because before he could apologise, he needed to know what he'd done. Knowing what you were apologising for was a big part of taking accountability, Jamie knew that now. The part where he'd gone and gotten his head rattled by a midfielder with anger issues didn’t excuse his actions, and it didn't make it any less his fault. Whatever he’d done to drive Sam — Sam — to yell at him, it couldn’t’ve been good. Still, he didn’t know what he could’ve done that was so bad that just the mention of it had Sam’s face turning spoiled sick. With a hand pressed to his chest, the lad looked seconds away from fainting, the grip on his water bottle so tight it might burst at any moment. Before Jamie could ask how high a debt he’d be paying off for the rest of his life, Sam shook his head and said, “No. Jamie, no. No, that is not-“ Whatever it wasn’t apparently wasn’t worth mentioning, because Sam chewed through the distance between them in two large steps. His body barely had a chance to startle backwards before Sam had him in his grasp.

He cradled Jamie against his chest. Lean, capable arms wrapped tightly around his shoulder and lower back, avoiding the sore spots the doctors had pointed out like they were real injuries instead of short term inconveniences. Sam breathed in deeply, a long inhale followed by a welcomed exhale, and Jamie found his own breathing struggling to match the pace. He let his head drop onto Sam's shoulder; since he couldn’t have painkillers around the house right now, the headache was killing him. “I worry sometimes that we are speaking two languages,” Sam admitted quietly against his ear. “That if I am not careful, I will accidentally do something to harm you. “Nah,” Jamie argued. “I’m tough. Not much you could do to hurt me.” Sam hummed, a rumbly little noise that rattled into Jamie’s chest, clearing away the cobwebs. “Let me cook for you. Come over to my place tonight.”

Some things were just too good to last.

“Can’t." Jamie said, starting to pull away even though regret tugged between his ribs. “Roy said we could start training again, and I've got stuff I need to get ready. 'Sides, I’m not supposed to -“

Sam held him fast.

"Jamie, please," Sam begged. "Training can wait one more day. In the meantime, I would like to cook for my friend. Please. Come over. Let us fix things. He should say no. He had responsibilities, things he'd committed to that should feel more important than jumping at the chance to skive off and play tea party with his friends. But he was so so tired, and any excuse not to spend another minute at home was a fucking life raft, and Sam-

Sam looked so bloody hopeful. “Yeah, alright," Jamie agreed, allowing the life raft to drift him a little further offshore. "D’you want me to bring anything?” Sam squeezed his shoulders. “Thank you. And no, that isn't necessary. Do not worry- I will stick to your nutrition plan. Only if Coach asks, we will tell him that all the food was fried.” Jamie grinned. It didn't even feel like a chore this time. "Sound."

[presidentdisastraofgallifrey]

Doctor Who and The 500-Year Diary

(Take 2)

One: 0-650. Was in his mid-200's upon leaving Gallifrey, a little over 100 years out of the academy. I choose to believe he was born disabled, because some sort of looming issues, hence the cane, but I have given up reconciling him looking old. It doesn't matter. He and Susan wander for a while before the show starts, so that by the time he leaves her on Earth it's been 150 years since they left home (so he's around 400 and she's somewhere close to 220). The show doesn't represent the true gaps he has between companions, so he's in his mid-600's when he actually regenerates, having already filled up his first diary. He mostly grumbles and complains in it, requiring reading between the lines to get the adventures, but if you look closely you can see his care and the fun he had. Also he sometimes unexpectedly includes genuinely funny jokes and anecdotes.

Two: 650-700. Very short life, the vast majority of it spent with Jamie. Prefers art and music to writing, and most of his diary entries are just watercolors of landscapes with Jamie in front of them.

Three: 700-748. Equally short life. About 8 years with unit as punishment, and 10 dying of radiation in the tardis, leaving 30 that he spent adventuring. That was almost all during Sarah's time, but he went off without her so much that she only spent like 5 years with him. While trapped on Earth, he would often start diary entries out as complaints about humans and Time Lords and other foolish things, but end up talking excitedly about some adventure or his current companion or Bessie. Not needing to sleep as much as humans do and getting bored very easily, he spends whole nights writing out lists of places to travel when he can and half-formed emergency plans and other such things. He writes very rarely once he has his freedom back, but occasionally comments on some adventure or other.

Four: 748-1,113. As best canon can tell, he only spent about 65 years as Four, but I refuse that to believe that two Time Lords didn't spend centuries traveling together. He spent somewhere between 4-6 years with Sarah, a few decades alone, 5-8 years with Leela, a few decades alone, and the rest with Romana except a few months at the end. He's really bad at remembering to keep his diary. He does sometimes write about the feelings he doesn't realize he doesn't share aloud, and intermittently writes about adventures, but when he does he heavily editorializes them into the way he wants to remember them. After Romana's regeneration, she (with minimal permission) starts correcting his entries, and then just writing about their adventures for him - much more accurate and somewhat more consistently, but still not every adventure, just the interesting ones. He still writes, but mostly about interesting thoughts or sometimes feelings or those moments when he realizes "OH! That's what they meant!" days later. He doesn't write at all between her leaving and his regeneration. He fills the second diary.

Five: 1,113-(almost) 1,500. I can't say how he writes yet, but this is the era he stops bothering to accurately keep track of his own age and just starts telling everyone he's 900.

Six: 1,500-1,700. He finishes his third diary soon after regenerating, realizes "oh, I must be 1500," and immediately goes back to telling everyone he's 900.

Seven: 1,700-2,000. Fills fourth diary.

Eight: 2,000-2,080. He has a lot of adventures, but I feel like he shouldn't last long. May change this when I actually get this far. He takes a break from the 900 thing and just makes up random numbers to cover for having no idea how old he is.

War: The Time War messes it up so he doesn't really count against age, both because trauma and it's genuinely impossible to count. Doesn't write. Actually tries to destroy his diaries and his useless, pointless past, but the tardis rescues them and spits them back out into the library after he regenerates.

Nine: 2,080-2,100. Shortest life ever. Tries to recapture a hint of his former self by going back to saying he's 900. Writes about every adventure (at least, every one with Rose), but in an emotionless, listed itinerary sort of way.

Ten: 2,100-3,000. Starts counting his life again, but has almost convinced himself he really was 900 and starts from there. And also is bad at math. Writes a lot, like way too much, about his emotions without actually processing them. Does also gush about his companions, and people he meets on adventures, rarely telling the full adventure story but more talking about pieces of it in detail. Finishes fifth and sixth diaries, but both times registers how old that must make him and immediately forgets.

Eleven: 3,000-4,200. The most ADHD anyone has ever been. Starts describing an adventure and trails off mid-entry into a totally different story or a ranking of cool planets or lists of funny words or doodles of his companions. Sometimes gets frustrated at his past self for this because he was trying to look something up and found the diary useless. Fills up his seventh and eighth diaries, and both are heavily dented from being chucked across the room.

Twelve: 4,200-5,700. His diary is a weird mix of things. Right after a traumatic adventure, will rant and rave against the universe. Months or years after a fun adventure will fondly remember it, crossing out messily bits that he misremembers and re-remembers mid writing. Infodumps about new hobbies while pretending not to care about them. Skips decades at a time, which is how Missy took it and roleplayed as him for so many years without him noticing that she eventually just told him. He didn't cross out her entries but did write in the margins angry commentary. Filled ninth, tenth, and eleventh diaries.

Thirteen: 5,700-5,790. Spent 20 years with Yaz (and others), 10 alone between adventures, and 60 in prison. Didn't have her diary in prison. Did write a lot for the other 30 years, but is the second most ADHD anyone has ever been and had a tendency to start stories ("so we landed in London in 1863"), get distracted talking about how amazing Yaz is or this cool person they met or the wonders of some ordinary thing, and then forget to tell the middle before concluding the story ("and we sent the daleks packing"). Also just goes on a lot of happy rants with no story attached. Uses SO many exclamation points, but never shares more than surface level excitements and annoyances.

Fourteen: 7,790-6,000. The other round numbers are estimations, but this one is not. He stays with Donnas family for over 200 years, until Rose's grandchildren are old, and heals and relaxes and finally chooses to regenerate (sort of; who knows how that works) when he has filled up the last of his 12 diaries. Uses his diary to finally work through his emotions, talk with excitement about the wonders of ordinary life he's discovering, and sometimes draw, paint, or do those scrapbook-type journal pages.

Fifteen: 6,000+. Being done with a whole diary set feels like a fresh start, but is also sad. It's not like he can just go home for more. But then, inexplicably at first, he discovers more in the tardis library (that she put right by the others). Another whole set, matching (unlike his), of the type often given as academy graduation gifts. It turns out these were Romana's. The first 80 years are filled by Romana i, but after her regeneration she sort of shared his. So he reads them (and cries), and then starts using the first one has his new diary. Fourteen was in the habit of writing every night, so at first (while Ruby is there), Fifteen actually writes about every adventure in detail, though slowly he does get more and more distracted and writes less often. He also tends to focus very heavily on the little details he loved and gloss over big things like almost dying or the horror of whatever they saw this time.

The Doctor never writes about their regenerations. They will note that they did, and write in detail about who they are now (sometimes. depends on who they are now), but never about what killed them.

[renee-writer]

Natural Remedies Chapter 11

AO3

“So, it is working?” Doctor Joe leans against the paddock with a grin. Yes it means less income for himself but he is comfortable and the health of the horses come first. Always.

 

Jamie sighs. “Aye it is. No offense but much better then the standard remedy. They are taking their feed better and having less issues with their digestion.”

 

Joe nods. He sees it himself. The way the horses move about the paddock is easier. The five there are the ones that have been suffering from colic. They are now galloping around as if their stomach has never had an issue.

 

“Very good. May I asked what changed your mind?”

 

His eyes grow distant as he glances out way past the paddock and the fields beyond it. After a second, he blinks and comes back to the present.

 

“I started seeing her as a human,” he laughs, “I should say, as less of a troublesome pushy person. She is a single parent as well. I get that struggle well. I get needing to do whatever is necessary to see to a bairn.”

 

“Yes, that would make a difference.”

 

Jamie sighs. “Joe, I dreamed of her last night.”

 

His mate fully focused on him.  His brows go up. “What type of dream?”

 

He squirms. “Uh, the type that is usually about Mary.”

 

“I see.”

 

“Do you, I don’t. She isn’t my enemy anymore, if she ever was but…”

 

“Jamie, maybe you were angry with her because you are attracted to her.”

 

He jerks as if slapped. “Christ Alive! I cannae be!”

 

“Why not, she is an attractive woman, smart, kind.”

 

“She isn’t Mary.”

 

Joe moves to put his arm around him. “She wouldn’t want you to live in the past. You know this.”

 

“Nae I know she wouldn’t. It just isn’t that simple. I really thought I would be spending the rest of my life with her. To imagine being with someone else…”

 

“I know. You have however much time you need to get there. But, this might be the opening you need to do that.”

 

“Maybe. I will give it some thought. It probably doesn’t matter. She is grieving too.”

 

“Something in common.”

 

Jamie laughs with Joe. “A horrible thing to have in common, eh. But true enough.”

[fanfictiongirlie]

Classic Who: Oh Jamie, I Love You -Chapter Two

Parings: Jamie Mccrimmon x Female OC (Can be read as reader too so no use of Y/N) - written in first person.

Description: OC has been travelling with the Doctor for a while, and when Jamie comes along it gets even better. And smuttier, it gets smuttier.

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: Fluff & Smut thats about it :)

Words: 21,171 (Currently where it stands, I haven't finished it, I just keep adding chapters)

p.s I wrote this because I love Jamie Mccrimmon. Like most who love Doctor Who. There's a small amount of plot, with mostly every chapter being cute scenarios with Jamie. Originally I wrote this for myself, but I thought, why not share.

Jamie and I reached the Tardis, the Doctor and Zoe were standing at the console, the Doctor gave us a knowing smile. I looked back at Jamie seeing him blush the same as I. 

"Did you have fun out there?" Zoe asked us. 

"Yes loads, what did you get up too?" I asked, leaning against the console. The Tardis began moving after the Doctor pressed a few buttons. 

"I took a walk through the plants and analysed a few of them, I've never seen plants so amazing" Zoe smiled. I nodded, agreeing. 

"I may go sit in the Library, would you like to join me Jamie?" I asked turning to Jamie. 

He smiled at me "Yea I'd like that" And he began following me to the Library. Happily I wandered through the Tardis and finally reached the Library, I walked over to the couch and sat down, I patted the space next to me, Jamie walked to the couch and sat next to me, close by. 

"This is my favourite room in the Tardis" I admitted to Jamie, I loved nothing more than being around books. 

"The Library? You spend a lot of time reading then?" He asked, looking around the room.

"I guess I do yeah" I say as I shuffle myself closer to Jamie. Jamie shifts closing the gap in between us, wrapping his arm around my waist. I felt the blush creeping back onto my face. I leant forward and pressed a sweet kiss to Jamie's lips. He returned the kiss, whilst placing his other hand on my arm, stroking my skin gently. 

We kissed for a little while long before I pulled away smiling brightly at him. 

"Jamie, I'm sure you've guessed by now, but I really like you" I admit. 

He chuckled, and his cheeks pinked slightly.

"Well I guess I've had a slight hint that you liked me" He grins cheekily, his cheeks turning a deeper shade of pink, his eyes not looking away from mine.

"I really do want to spend my life travelling with you" I admit "And the Doctor!" I add sheepishly. 

"You want to spend the rest of your life with me?" He asks, his eyes lighting up, getting brighter by the second "That's probably the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me"

"Yes, if you'd have me for the rest of your life" I say nervously, I reach over and hold his hand in mine. 

"I would love to spend my life with you" He says, his fingertips tracing circles on my hand. 

"Hmm love" I say quietly to myself. I move forward and rest my head on Jamie's shoulder, cuddling into him. He wraps his arms around me in a comforting hug, he then brings his hand up to my hair and starts running his fingers through my hair. 

"I'll fall asleep if you carry on" I say wistfully, letting my eyes close at the feeling of his fingers in my hair. 

"Hmm I wouldn't mind if you fell asleep while I was holding you" Jamie says with a little smirk.

"Oh Jamie, you sweet talker, who knew" I say cheekily, whilst snuggling further into him. 

"Who knew, I could be so sweet" Jamie chuckles whilst holding me tighter "Do you know what else I want to do?"

"What?" I ask feeling so content. 

"I want to kiss you again" He whispers, he moved slightly so we were face to face.

"Kiss me, I'm yours" I say hopefully, looking into his perfect eyes. 

His smile grows, and he leans in to kiss me, feeling our lips lock together, as his hand wraps behind my hair, pulling me in slightly closer. I lazily move my lips against his, and let my hands hold the sides of his face, caressing him gently.

Jamie moves his hand from the back of my head to my neck, whilst his other hand goes down to hold my hip. I pulled away from the kiss and grinned up at Jamie. 

"Does this mean you like me?" I ask, giggling. 

"Is that even a question, I adore you" He chuckles.

I wanted to tell him how I adored him too, but instead I pressed my lips against his once more. Loving the feeling of him. Jamie guides himself back into the kiss, our lips locked together, more passionately than before. 

I moan breathlessly against his lips, my hands reaching out for his shirt collar bringing him closer to me, if that were possible. His hands moved down to my back, his fingers sneaking under my shirt, touching the lower skin of my back. I felt so intoxicated by Jamie, feeling his fingers on my back drove me insane with passion, I wanted all of him, forever. 

Jamie kept running his fingers up and down my back, I start to lean backwards so I could lay flat on the couch, Jamie continues to kiss me and follows me down, the kiss becoming more heated. Soon he was hovering over me, his lips still captured by mine, I poke my tongue out slightly and lick his bottom lip. 

Our tongues moved together, and Jamie's hands were still tracing up and down my back. I moaned quietly, not wanting to be too loud. I ran my fingers to the back of his neck, gently rubbing where his hair line ended. 

Jamie let out a low moan, his lips away from mine now, and slowly moving down to my neck, he kisses down from my lips down to my collarbone, making me pant softly. 

"Feels so good Jamie" I whisper, his lips burning my skin with each kiss. 

"Yeah? Does it feel good?" I can feel his lips smile against my skin.

"So good, you're perfect" I giggle, I run my hands through his hair.

"I don't think I'm perfect" He says, slightly laughing, his tongue poking out and trailing along my collarbone. 

"I think you are, my sexy scotsman" I say, feeling a little cringe but I didn't care, I only cared about Jamie's lips on my skin. 

"You think I'm a sexy scotsman?" Jamie asks, I could see his cheeks redden from where I was laying. He continues kissing along my neck. 

"You're torturing me!" I groan, my skin tingling wherever he touched. 

He looked up slightly and grinned widely at me. "Am I?" He asks, he goes back to kissing my neck, his hands slowly moving to my hips, and holding onto them. Suddenly he starts kissing me slightly lower than my collarbone. 

I gasp pleasantly at him kissing a new area on my body, it was making me feel dizzy. I tried focusing on his hands moving their way up and down the sides of my body. 

"You know you are" I groan at him. 

"How would I know?" He asks cheekily, nibbling at my skin. 

"If I wasn't enjoying this so much, I'd punch you" I giggle breathlessly.

"Oh really?" He asks, looking up to give me a goofy grin. He kisses along my collarbone to my shoulder. 

"Your lips are intoxicating" I say, feeling slightly embarrassed.

"You love my lips?" Jamie asks, kissing up towards my jaw. 

"Jamiee!" I whine, feeling overly teased. 

"Hm?" He giggled sarcastically "What's wrong? Don't you like?" His lips still touching my skin and his hands still slowly rubbing up and down my side. 

"I love, really love, please don't stop" I beg, loving the attention I was getting. 

He chuckles and carries on. 

"Never stop" I mumble, watching Jamie kiss my shoulder. 

Jamie lets out an amused sigh "Never?" He looks up at me, grinning. 

"Never ever" I giggle, leaning forward to capture a quick kiss on his lips. As we were kissing, he moved his hand down to the thigh, his fingers moving slightly against my jeans. 

"Mmm" I hum softly from his touch. I squirm slightly as his hand moves slowly up my thigh, and back down again. 

"Oh Jamie" I moan softly his fingers on my thigh being the best feeling ever. His hand continues caressing up and down my thigh. His other hand moving up across my stomach and up to my jaw, holding my face in his hand. 

He moves up slightly so his lips were pressed to mine, I kiss back though I was slightly distracted by his hands on my body. 

"I love you" I mumble against his lips, hoping that it wasn't too soon to say that. He pulls away from my lips, his smile grows, whilst he blushes like a schoolgirl.

"You really mean that?" He asks.

"I do" I say, feeling my face heat up, scared he'd reject me. His smile brightens, and his eyes almost looked like they were gleaming with joy, the blush from his cheeks covering his entire face now. 

"I love you too, I mean it" He grins, happily I threw my arms around his neck, bringing him in for a tight hug, our bodies firmly pressed together. 

He wraps his arms around me too, and pressing his lips against mine again, kissing me passionately. I kiss him back, matching his passion, hoping no one would walk in on us, my hands moving up and down his back. I slowly move my hands until their under Jamie's shirt, I stroke the skin of his lower back. 

Jamie lets out a surprised breathless laugh, pulling away from the kiss. 

"I feel so comfortable with you" I say bashfully.

"I feel very at ease with you too" He says warmly. 

"Oh Jamie, I'm so glad we can tell one another our feelings" I smile, and snuggle into him. 

"I'm glad we can too, it's nice being so comfortable" He says, looking at me lovingly. 

As we laid and snuggled for a bit longer, I felt the Tardis had landed again.

"We've landed, the Doctor will be expecting us" Jamie says "He always lands at the worst moments" He chuckles.

"We could always hide out in here" I grin, slightly moving my body against his. 

"The Doctor will surely come looking for us, we can't exactly hide out in the Library" Jamie chuckles. 

"I suppose not, maybe we can hide in one of our rooms, he never goes into them" I say, smirking. 

"Well, we could, let's do it!" Jamie smiles widely. 

"Or, we could just tell him the truth, that we want to spend some alone time together" I say. The Doctor would never have an issue with that. 

"I think I like that second idea more, he'd understand if we wanted some alone time" Jamie smiles. 

"Definitely!" I smile "I'll go and tell him" I climbed off the couch, missing the warmth of Jamie as soon as I did. I gave him a quick kiss before leaving him in the Library, I skip towards the console room where I believed the Doctor to be. 

Zoe and and the Doctor were standing in front of the scanner looking outside.

"Doctor?" I grin walking towards the two of them. 

"Yes?" He asks, turning towards me. 

"Would you be okay if Jamie and I had a day to us?" I ask, he looked at me confused, but Zoe smiled knowingly. 

"Finally told him then?" She smirks at me. I poke my tongue out playfully at her. 

"Why yes, if you two so wish, make sure you use protection" The Doctor smiles and turns away. I blushed heavily, I left the console room and rush back to the Library, seeing Jamie still lying on the couch.

"You look comfortable" 

Jamie chuckles, and sits up. 

"Was the Doctor okay with it?" He asks. 

"I think so, he even made a joke about us using protection" 

I could see the embarrassment on Jamie's face. 

"Did he really say that?" He asks, shocked. 

"Yes" I answer nervously. 

Jamie chuckles "You know, the Doctor is a bit too much sometimes, I don't think he understands boundaries"

"No, but we still love him" I chuckle. I lean over and take Jamie's hand in mine.

"We do, are you ready to spend some alone time together?" He asked, like we hadn't just spent so much alone time together. 

"I think I am Mr McCrimmon, shall we go to your room or mine?" I ask. 

Jamie chuckles "You can choice, I don't mind"

"Such a gentleman" I smirk, still holding his hand I pull him towards the Library door and out into the Tardis corridor. 

[percontaion-points]

Edible Delectables chapters 9 & 10

Click to see the rest of the snark & image descriptions

Chapter 9

"They cost over two hundred dollars, woman! Find those sheets!"

JFC what the goddamned fucking hell are they made out of, unicorn hair? I got a new sheet set the other week, and they cost me FORTY DOLLARS. 

He was suddenly acutely aware that his life was going to be drastically changed by this woman. And he couldn't be more excited about it.

They literally went on one date. YESTERDAY. Calm the fuck down, buddy. 

Jason was currently sitting in her living room, instead of burning rubber to get the hell away from the crazy girl he slept with the night before. This was going to take more than cupcakes to atone for; oral was definitely in his future. 

No, Jason is still at fault here. He still could have and should have sent her a text or literally anything other than to assume that her incoherent “mm-hmm” was an indication that she was awake and coherent enough to understand. 

The fact that Kara feels like apologising is super gross. 

Thankfully, he didn’t get called back into work that night.

Chapter 9 summary: Eva continues to yell at Kara as she wades through the dumpster, screaming at her that the sheets cost $200. As the two of them are going in, Jason pulls up and wants to know what’s going on. 

He tells Kara that he got called away to tend to a patient (you know, seeing as how he’s a goddamned hospital doctor and everything), and when Kara “responded” to him, he thought that leaving a note wasn’t necessary. 

They go inside, but Jason waits while Kara showers to rid herself of the stench of the dumpster. As she’s doing this, she thinks that she owes Jason an apology, rather than the dude who left without leaving a fucking note or even bothering to send her a goddamned text. 

She gets out, apologises for her behaviour, and then goes down on him. After this is finished, the narration glosses over them having sex, like the author is already bored with her own work. I know I am; there’s literally no actual problem in this novel. 

Chapter 10

 Jason just smiled silently, and slipped his arm around her shoulder as they walked to the parking lot.

Chapter 10 summary: The next morning, Kara makes plans to spend the evening together with Jason. But once she’s in the bakery, she realises that she has too much work, and cancels on him. 

Jason meanwhile decides to go to the gym since he doesn’t have anything better to do on his day off. While he’s there, his sister comes over and says that she’s meeting up with some guy. Jason then rehashes the miscommunication between Kara, as if we hadn’t spent the past three fucking chapters going over this! But there’s literally no plot, so I guess the author wanted to hammer in the only actual problem in the book. 

After Jamie leaves with her date, Jason then is despondent over not getting to see Kara that night. So he decides to bring roses to her bakery, which Kara is obviously pleased about. She lets him into the kitchen for a baking lesson, and the two of them leave together.

Plot? What plot? Everything has been resolved by chapter 9. There is nothing keeping them apart from each other, no petty mean girl driving a wedge into their relationship, no miscommunication, etc etc. Why the fuck are there 23 chapters in this book if 14 of them are the “and they lived happily ever after”?

[lostmind3]

Oh boy. I have So Many suggestions, you have no idea.

For the 2nd Doctor:

- Dr Finlay by Andy Stewart - I’ve always thought that it feels exactly like the kind of song that Jamie would sing to tease the Doctor

For the 5th Doctor:

- Jiggery Pokery by The Duckworth Lewis Method - it’s a cricket song and the singer loses the game because he underestimated the bowler. Lots of 5th Doctor vibes

- You’ve Got to Be a Cricket Hero (To Get Along With the Beautiful Girls) by Cantabile The London Quartet - again it’s a cricket song but this one just has Tegan vibes to me. Like with Dr Finlay and Jamie i can see Tegan singing it (extremely sarcastically) to annoy the Doctor

For the 7th Doctor:

- Mr. Shorty by Marty Robbins - a short man, a friendly but lonely and sad stranger, who stumbles upon trouble and defeats his opponent “before he could start” and then leaves, never to be seen again.

For the 8th Doctor/War Doctor:

- ButterflyWaltz by Brian Crain - this is a pre-war 8th Doctor song. No lyrics, just a waltz, but it’s the kind of music I can picture him playing in the tardis

- Sound the Bugle by Bryan Adams - the 8th Doctor loses hope, rejects his name and becomes the Warrior. But in the end he becomes the Doctor again and saves Gallifrey.

- Mars by Sleeping at Last - this song makes me think of the time war in general, the line about bodies born to heal become so prone to die really fits with time lords and regeneration. The whole song just fits really well with the 50th anniversary and the end of the time war.

For the 9th Doctor:

- Old Scars/Future Hearts by All Time Low - Nine is kicking and screaming his way to healing, he’ll carry the guilt forever but this is HIS life to live and he’s going to live it (and he begs the universe not to hate him for that). This song also has some Rose post meeting Sarah Jane vibes (I don’t wanna be the one left behind)

- Walk Me Home by P!nk - I don’t think I need to explain this one do i? It’s Nine’s feelings about Rose to a T

- Eye of the Storm by ONE OK ROCK - this song practically embodies Nine’s era. Ominous signs and bad luck following you, “Wolves at the door”, but ultimately there’s always hope and things will get better

For the 10th Doctor:

- The Edge of Tonight by All Time Low - lots of Rose and 10 feels, “I can’t breathe without you near, you keep me safe, you keep me sane” kinda just sums up how 10 feels about Rose.

- Ghost of a Rose by Blackmore’s Night - you can probably guess from the name what this one makes me think of right?

- i love you by Billie Eilish - 10 and his “I can’t spend the rest of my life with you” mentality that keeps him from being able to admit he loves Rose

For the 11th Doctor:

- DARKSIDE by Neoni - specifically, this one makes me think of the Eleven and the Dream Lord in Amy’s Choice

For the 13th Doctor:

- The Downfall by Ruelle - she’s just found out that her whole life is a lie and has no idea what to think

For the Doctor in general (no specific incarnation):

- Don’t Think Just Run by Beth Crowley - it’s fun and really fits the whole don’t stop, make it up as you go along lifestyle the Doctor lives

- It’s Time by Imagine Dragons - has really strong regeneration vibes with the chorus about getting a bit bigger but remaining who I am. Plus the idea of not really wanting to leave reminds me a lot of the first Doctor talking about how one day he and Susan will return to Gallifrey

- Hold the Line (feat. ARIZONA) by Avicii - listen to it and tell me that this doesn’t fit the Doctor to a T, I dare you

- Change by Kimia Penton - another song that reminds me of regeneration, but this one is more about how the companions respond to it

- Run by OneRepublic - this song is the Doctor’s whole mentality on life honestly

- Ghost of You by Selena Gomez & the Scene - regeneration vibes again; this time the Doctors thoughts on how the ghost of past incarnations influence who they are now

- Takes Me Nowhere by the Offspring - the Doctor (post time war) and his guilt complex

For the Master:

- Meet Your Master by Nine Inch Nails - you cannot convince me that the Simms Master wouldn’t have blasted this on the Valiant’s loudspeakers at some point

- Drumming Song by Florence + the Machine - lots of Missy vibes frankly

- Genghis Khan by Miike Snow - if you haven’t seen it before please watch the music video. It is an ExperienceTM. Tell me it doesn’t scream the Master and the Doctor and their weird relationship. Especially Thirteen and Dhawan’s Master.

- Kristy, Are You Doing Ok? by The Offspring - This is almost an Academy Era song to me? Early days of how the Master and the Doctor started to fall apart as friends.

- Fix You by TheOffspring - both the Doctor and the Master wish they could “fix” the other, both of them ultimately know it’s not possible but they try anyway

For various Companions:

- Rose: Fire in the Rain by Måns Zelmerlöw - I think this song perfectly sums up how Rose feels about the Doctor and travelling in the Tardis

- Clara: Highwayman by Johnny Cash - Clara and her many echoes

- Jamie McCrimmon: The Battle’s O’er by Andy Stewart - it’s a short and bittersweet song about Scottish soldiers who returned home and those who didn’t. I think I it fits the mood of how Jamie was returned to his home time without his memories of the Doctor very well

- Companions in general: Into the Storm by BANNERS

- the Tardis: You’re My Home by Billy Joel

Also you should look up Legs Nose Robinson and Chameleon Circuit. Both artists create music based on Doctor Who and it is brilliant.

I need recommendations for my Doctor Who playlist any suggestions?

[doccywhomst]

Hey Miss Doccy! Speaking of autism monopoly- which monopoly pieces would the Doctors pick??

as someone on the autism spectrum who's extremely passionate about my chosen monopoly piece (if you guess it, you win an arbitrary doccywhomst point), I AM QUALIFIED TO ANSWER THIS!

HERE WE GO!!!

one: cowboy on horse, hands down. he'd be like "hee hee hoo hoo" and make it gallop across the board, and he'd refer to all of his houses and hotels as "stables" and "saloons"

two: he strikes me as a scottie dog fellow?? i feel like he'd be absolutely terrible at monopoly but a joy to play with. he'd lose and hold the little dog and mope around until jamie inevitably gave him a bail-out loan

three: you already know. this bitch is so obsessed with the car that he carries it around in a special little pocket, perpetually ready for someone to challenge him at monopoly. he's quite good at strategy games, but he keeps redistributing his funds to other players and "donating" enormous sums of money to the free parking pile, so he loses

four: this hoe is the boot. look at him.

that's the most raggedy-ass leather boot man ive ever seen in my life (affectionate)

five: he'd think for a really, really long time, trying to decide between the thimble, the iron, and the cannon, and i think he'd eventually go with the cannon, probably saying something like "the best defense is an excellent offense, turlough!" before immediately and decisively losing

six: special edition cat.

i rest my case.

seven: for some reason, i think he'd choose the iron. i'm probably getting a bit psychoanalytical, but he'd pick it because it seems like a fairly innocuous and innocent piece - it's traditionally domestic, feminine, and unassuming. but irons are so fucking dangerous that it's kind of insane, which fits his personality *nervous sweating*

eight: he's a thimble. not to say that he's symbolically harmless, because he's easily one of The Scariest and most eldritch doctors ever, but he'd pick the thimble every time and spend most of the game talking in circles about the history of thimbles, who made the first thimble, why thimbles have dimples, what thimblettes are, and he'd tell sixteen different terrible jokes about thimbles. what a specimen. best character

shalka: he's so wild, i feel like he'd casually whip out a monopoly piece from the future, or like, an alien monopoly piece with tentacles n shit, and alison would just be like

war: contrary to popular belief, he'd be the wheelbarrow, or the dog. trust me on this. he radiates extreme wheelbarrow vibes and i'm not sure why, but i feel strongly about it

nine: he doesn't play monopoly. it's a game about capitalism and market manipulation, and by proxy, worker exploitation. he'd rather play with all the pieces and make a story, which is so valid-

ten: he'd be the top hat because he likes holding it on the tip of his finger like it's a little dapper gentleman. donna does the same thing with the thimble. they talk back and forth in dapper gentleman voices and wiggle their fingers until they're in hysterics

eleven: he'd have a slap fight with One over the cowboy piece until amy puts them in their get along shirt. they come to a compromise by duplicating the piece, so now there are two little cowboy horse guys galloping across the board, and they keep pretending to shoot each other. "this game ain't big enough for the two of us!" amy quits.

twelve: he joins forces with nine and refuses to play monopoly, preferring to design an increasingly complicated fantasy world for the pieces to live in, complete with maps and diagrams and magic systems and physics, and nine just sort of nods while making the plane and the cannon kiss

thirteen: she's absolutely the battleship. she slays so fucking hard at monopoly, she takes no prisoners. a menace to civilized society. you've never seen this level of chilling, merciless dedication in someone's eyes. she's dead serious about it, a total fanatic, and then she wins and it's like

end note: i want to hear how your favorite piece chalks up to this, as well as what your headcanons are! but also im right, sorry, lol

[multifandomfix]

To-Do List: Fics

Updated December 24th, 2024

Requests will be removed from this list when they’re finished being written and put in my queue/drafts. There’s also a possibility of them being removed due to lack/loss of inspiration for them.

❤️🧡💛💚💙💜

Crane Games - Niles Crane (Requested by @msiecrane)

You and Niles aren’t ready to tell people about your relationship, and you’ve gone to great lengths to keep it under wraps, but nothing can stay secret forever.

It’s Good To Be Bad - Leland Townsend (Requested by Anon)

You’ve done something you’re not proud of, but Leland hopes to wipe you of your shame and bring out the darker side of you.

The Queen’s Secret - Queen Charlotte (Requested by 🦎 Anon)

Charlotte confides in her closest friends about her growing feelings for you, a servant in her court and they advise her on matters of the heart.

Read You Like A Book - Tom Koracick (Requested by @ghostsunderstoodmysoul)

Five times you and Tom spend time together reading in some form and one time where someone else joins.

Happy Accidents - Tom Koracick (Requested by @ghostsunderstoodmysoul)

You come into Grey Sloan after a minor car accident. Your doctors want to give you an X-ray, but you refuse. Then word makes its way to Tom.

Where Work Meets Play — Tissaia de Vries (Requested by Anon)

All the stress in her life has really been weighing on Tissaia lately, so you decide to offer her a little bit of relief when you find her still in her office late one night, but you’re not expecting Triss to be paying her a visit as well.

Model Girlfriend — Elizabeth James (Requested by Anon)

When you begin modeling for wedding dress designer Elizabeth James, you don’t expect to fall in love with her, and you definitely don’t expect her to love you back, but with the help of her adorable yet meddling twin daughters, you find that being with her might just be possible.

Conditional — The Handler (Requested by Anon)

When you were growing up, you lived next door to the Hargreeves siblings and were close friends. Years later, you’ve disappeared, and they don’t even seem to notice. The Handler thought you’d lure Five and the rest of them right into her clutches, but it’s taking too long for them to find you. You’ve tried everything to get back home, but perhaps it’s time you gave up and resigned yourself to your life the way it is now.

From Bad To Worse — Louise Walker (Requested by Anon)

When you pass out from the heat and fall into one of the holes, Louise is called to get you out, but not before you’re also bit by a rattlesnake. Looks like she’s going to have you all to herself while you recover.

The Accomplice — Wadsworth (Requested by Anon)

You’re married to Wadsworth, and you’re wise to his scheme. You even go as far as aiding him in the murders, though no one else knows you’re there.

Betrayal - Uther Pendragon (Requested by Anon)

During a moment of crisis, you save Uther’s life with magic, but even so he doesn’t take kindly to you having kept it a secret from him. Will he see you executed, or have a change of heart?

Game, Set, Match - Jamie Tartt (Requested by Anon)

Post match, you have an exciting announcement for Jamie.

Whoopsie Baby - Gregory House (Requested by Anon)

After you find out you’re pregnant, you’re having a hard time telling your boyfriend Greg, but maybe he won’t take the news in the way you pictured.

On Paper - Jethro Gibbs (Requested by @lemmons1998)

You and Gibbs are undercover as a married couple and just when you’re closing in on the killer, he has one final surprise left in store.

A Necessary Secret - Susie Myerson (Requested by Anon)

Though you’re married, you carry on a relationship with Susie in secret. She wants you to leave him, but staying with your husband is the one thing that’s protecting her.

Flirting With Fire - Esmé Squalor (Requested by @ruvelle)

After Esmé hires you on as her assistant, you realize just how dangerous and alluring she can be. And your risky attraction to her is only spurred on by Esmé’s ceaseless game of teasing you.

Best Kept Secrets - Melissa Schemmenti (Requested by @strawberrypink-jellybeans)

The Abbott staff start to suspect there’s something between you and Melissa. Little do they know, you’re actually married.

❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🖤🤍🤎

Let me know which fics you’re most excited for!

[daydreaming-of-doctor-who]

hullo may I request headcanons for being in a romantic relationship with jamie?🥺 (also how do you think he would ask the reader out?)

A/N: Ah yes, our favorite Piper. Absolutely, I hope you enjoy! <3 I honestly made myself cry from what I wrote. Jamie is just such a sweetheart, thanks.

Being in a Romantic Relationship with Jamie McCrimmon:

Jamie was raised a different way, coming from 18th century Scotland. However, he would always be a gentleman and isn’t afraid to help those who need him.

If he’s attracted to you, he’s pretty good at making it obvious from the start, either by; being protective, flirting with you, or just telling you outright.

If you remain oblivious or Jamie is unsure if you feel the same way about him, he will ask the Doctor for some help in this matter.

However, once you both get past that barrier, he’s going to treat you perfectly like the gentleman that he is.

Instead of ‘dating’, he tells others that he is courting you with intentions to marry later on.

If that seems like things are moving too fast, Jamie will understand and follow your wishes.

He tries to come up with fun things for you to do when visiting another planet the Doctor has brought you to. He wants to get to know everything about you.

Jamie may even try to request the Doctor bringing you both to some exciting place for a date.

Thoughts of introducing you to his time and family may come to his mind from time to time. It’s not that he wants to leave the TARDIS, but he wants to his family to meet the person he has fallen in love with and plans to spend the rest of his life with! 😭

Zoe and Victoria (and the Doc from time to time) looking to you to help control Jamie or calm him down.

IF you both eventually decide to get married: it’s a beautiful scene in the TARDIS, with the Doctor marrying you both off. ❤️

Jamie didn’t expect to be traveling with the Doctor forever, but when the time comes and the Time Lords start to send everyone back to their proper times, he pleads with them to not be separated from you. To at least be able to remember each other, even if you won’t remember Zoe, the Doctor, or your adventures with them.

However, the Time Lords say there is nothing that can be done, sending you all away.

Returned back to your own times and places with no recollection of what happened, one thing crosses Jamie’s mind: the smile of someone. He can tell they are important to him from the swell of his heart. But how can he know of someone he’s never met?

Either way, he wants to find out. He wants to find them out there. He’s never one to give up.

[mutatedangels-a]

He wanted to hoist the words back where they came from as soon as they came out.

Who was he in telling her who she could and couldn't be with?

Jamie cursed himself. Though, really, all he wanted was for the girl to be happy. And in this moment, standing in a clinic with none other than her professor of all people, she didn't seem happy.

Not that he regretted being here for her, but Tobi should have had someone else to go through this with. Ryan should have been a good enough, trustworthy enough person for her to lean on over something like this. And yet, he wasn't. That was the most frustrating thing of all.

He took a deep breath and listened, waiting until the blonde was finished—there she was again with all of her zig-zagged sentences—before he spoke.

"You're so young to be thinking about spending the rest of your life with somebody. Waiting things out," he told her earnestly, shaking his head and letting out a dry chuckle.

"You can wait and wait and wait for somebody to end up being the right person you want, but it's a bold move.

"That person's either never going to live up to what you want them to be, no matter how much you simplify your desires. Or they're going to end up feeling like they're not good enough for you.

"Either way it's a risk that I don't think is worth it. You might come out of it realizing you've wasted your time. Almost your whole life if you're that unlucky."

Jamie took a deep breath and finally looked at her, lips thinning. "What if that point never comes and you don't get to look back and laugh at whatever it is you're going through? What if you'll be going through something, exhausted all the time, in perpetuity?"

It was a fate similar to purgatory. He reached up and rubbed the back of his neck in thought.

"Take it from me." It would be his last piece of wisdom before insisting the two leave the doctor's office and she get rest.

"After all, my wife divorced me, not the other way around," he continued. "I know what it's like to hold somebody back, and I also know what it feels like to be held back. You don't want to be on either side. And the younger you are when you realize that, the better."

October took a deep breath and nodded. The worst of this was over, now it was just time to move onward. Onward meant...well, not telling anyone. Sure, she could, and sure, it was probably the best option, but she was scared. That fear was not a distant memory. It was a nagging thing that demanded her attention.

"N-not right now." She shook her head, absently fussing with her bracelet as she spoke.

"Too much going on, I wanna at least get...settled in school, and stuff." The anxiety of a new year where she didn't have him as a professor loomed over her.

His comments about Ryan made a cold chill run down her spine. Her blood seemed to run ice cold, causing her to absently shiver and wrap her arms around herself, despite the summer heat.

"I---I---"

What was she supposed to say? Was she truly happy? No. Was Ryan a placebo, a replacement for what she wanted? Yes. She couldn't look Jamie in the face and tell him what she really wanted, because that was insane.

"Do you remember---"

No. She couldn't bring up the day at the beach. It wasn't right. She was sure he wasn't leaning to kiss her. Why would he? There was no reason for someone like him to want someone like her. Tobi went pale.

"Nevermind."

A pause hung here, demanding both their attention.

"He...might not be equipped for dealing with me. Most...people aren't, and that's hard, but it's not...his fault."

She curled into herself.

She could never have what she wanted.

"You ever love someone you can't have? You ever try to fill that void with...other people?"

Her voice was soft and strained. Tobi refused to look at him as she spoke, her eyes wide and her face a little pale.

"You just...fill the void with...stuff, and hope it goes away. And one day, you'll be able to look back and laugh about it. But in the moment, you're exhausted, and stressed out, and the person you want will never see you."

She was shaking terribly.

"Ryan might be filling the void. And...maybe one day, I'll snap out of this, and realize that he's fine. He's plenty...good enough, and I'm being unreasonable."

"D-don't worry about me. I'll be just fine. It's just a college romance, nothing too...serious, or crazy. It's just...I don't know. I wish I did."

She let out a breath she didn't realize she was holding. "I'm being silly. I'm sorry. Don't...don't worry about it. Any of it. It's fine, I'm fine."

[sweetbuckybarnes]

In Our 30s - Nine

Pairings: James Maguire + Erin Quinn

Summary: A post-series fic cantered on James and Erin. With University, Michelle and stupid decisions getting in the way of James and Erin getting together into their 30s.

Word count: 559

Series Masterlist | Main Masterlist

Present Day

The sound of an alarm brought Erin round from her slumber, Erin pushed her leg into her husband's leg to rouse him.

James reached his hand over and turned off the alarm - then rolled over a little to wrap his arms around his wife.

"Morning Erin," James said, pressing multiple kisses to her cheek and tucking her closer to his chest.

"Morning love," Erin replied, shuffling and James watched with half-open eyes as Erin rolled over in bed and stared up at him.

They were silent as they revelled in the piece before their kids woke up. 

"We better get up or else we're going to be late," James says - and this spurred them to clamber out of bed and get dressed for the day.

As Erin worked on her new novel at the kitchen table, she stopped typing as her chin rested on the palm of her hand. 

"James?" She called, seeing her children quietly (for once) sitting in the kitchen eating their cereal, with little to no complaints.

"Yes, love?" he asked, looking up from the shots they had filmed on his phone yesterday.

Erin smiled at him for a second, this is the man she gets to spend the rest of her life with. "Do you still have your old video camera?" She asked. "The one you used for our 18th?"

"I'll go get it," he tells her, pressing a kiss to the top of her head.

James found his camera, along with the old video tapes he used.

He even found the tape he was editing in the 90s. The one he swore he would never show Erin.

"What's on this one?" She asked, taking said video tape out of his hand.

"Something I never wanted to show you in the 90s," James said, getting a raised eyebrow from his wife in return. She slowly goes to put it back in his hands, until James laughed. "Not like that!"

James goes over to their old video player, which James has clung onto thanks to his old Doctor Who tapes from the 70s.

The video was the two of them and the girls, from the 90s - along with close-ups of her in her red jacket and old school uniform.

"You were smitten with me, weren't you, love?" Erin commented, throwing her arms around her husband's shoulders smiling at the young Orla, Clare and Michelle.

"Still am," James replies, pressing multiple kisses along any skin he could find of Erin's.

The sound of fake vomit drew James and Erin's attention away from the TV. Their son, the eldest. Jamie Joe Maguire.

Erin raised her eyebrow at him, and he stopped, having always been Erin's boy (but could appreciate Doctor Who more than his ma).

"Is that you, daddy?" The small voice of Elizabeth 'Liz' Rose Maguire. The apple of James' eye. His little girl, and their youngest.

James nodded, holding his hand out for Liz and the four watched the video tape before school. They explained what everything was like in Northern Ireland in the 1990s.

It was like Granda Joe said, at Erin and Orla's 18th birthday. They never believed James and Erin, shocked to think soldiers would climb aboard the school bus every day and check for bombs.

It was like a ghost story now.

[sunmoonandeddie]

feelings are fatal (20/24)

pairing: bucky barnes x reader, past steve rogers x reader

word count: 4,030

summary: After the events of Endgame, you struggle to come to terms with what you’ve lost, though you’re learning that you still have something to gain.

chapter warnings: swearing, violence, fluffiness

masterlist

a/n: I really hope

There was something to be said about how much Bucky Barnes cared for the people in his life that he considered his friends, his family.

Hell, he’d jumped out of many, many aircrafts for Sam, even though he wouldn’t admit it was for him.

He sent his therapist flowers and a gift for her birthday, despite the fact that more than half the time, they just annoyed the shit out of each other.

The amount of times he’d pulled you out of a funk was… Well, there was a lot.

However, there was also something to be said about how overboard Bucky Barnes could go when someone he loved had gotten hurt.

Or kidnapped by a Nazi terrorist organization and almost shot in front of him.

“Alright, you’re all tucked in,” he muttered under his breath, even as he went around the bed once again, his hands carefully tucking in your comforter all over again. “There we go… Are you comfortable? Too warm? Not warm enough?”

He’d been hovering the past four days since you’d gotten out of the medbay, and the five days before that when you’d been in and out of unconsciousness.

God, the feelings that had washed over you when you’d woken up again and found that he was back and your Soldat was gone. It was so bittersweet. You loved both of them, even if it was in different ways. Different shades, different tones of love.

You just kept telling yourself that the Soldat was right.

It was time for him to rest. Your time together was over.

But that in itself meant that it was time for something new to begin.

If only you could find a way to tell Bucky how you truly felt.

You watched him with your eyelids half closed, a drowsiness slurring your words as you laid there. “Jamie… Can you stop for a moment?” You don’t even think about how your words might make him feel, how they might sound.

“Oh… Right. Sorry if I’m annoying you,” he said, his voice dropping to where it was almost inaudible. He started to head for the door, having set down the water bottle in his hands.

“What?! No!” You said, quickly sitting up. You still felt like absolute shit, but you couldn’t let him leave. “I’m sorry. That’s not the words I wanted to come out. I… I just want you to relax for a moment. I’m okay.” Pulling your arm out of the warmth of your blankets, you patted the spot next to you. “Can we just… lay down and watch a movie for a bit?”

Bucky’s baby blues softened immediately, and he nodded, toeing off his sneakers. “Of course. I’m sorry… I’ve been…”

“Helicopter parenting?”

His cheeks flamed fire engine red as he slipped into the bed beside you, hesitating before pulling the blankets over him. “I don’t know if I like the parenting aspect of that,” he muttered, his arms wrapping around you and pulling you close. “FRI, can you turn on a movie?”

“Legally Blonde,” you added without a second thought, grinning at the confused look that painted his face. “Have you never seen Legally Blonde?”

“What? No? What the fuck is a Legally Blonde?” He asked. And, okay, yeah, he could gather from the context that it was a movie, most likely a girly one based on the title, but he loved the way you looked so aghast and the way you laughed at his old man tendencies.

“Only the greatest early 2000s chick flick of all time!” You squealed, playfully smacking his chest.

A wave of contentment, of happiness, washed over you as you laid half on his chest to watch the movie. His fingers were absentmindedly running up and down your spine, his breath tickling your forehead.

And it hit you that you could have this for the rest of your life. You could have this happiness, this peace, for the rest of your life with the man that was holding you.

Once again, you just needed to figure out how to tell him how you felt.

“Wait… So he broke up with her because she wasn’t… serious enough?” Bucky asked, his brows furrowed. “Or because she was too pretty and girly?”

“Both,” you said, glancing up at his face. “He sucks.”

“Yeah, he fucking does.”

When the movie ended, you sat up, risking a glance at Bucky’s face. “Well? What did you think?”

He couldn’t help but shake his head, groaning dramatically. “If Sam finds out that I’m a fan of early 2000s chick flicks, he’ll never let me hear the end of it.”

Oh, this was good. So, so good.

“Jamie, I’ve watched Legally Blonde and other chick flicks with Sam. He loves them,” you revealed, watching the way his eyes lit up.

“There’s more?!”

You took it upon yourself to show him the best of the late 90s and early 2000s, finding that when he was distracted with tales of cheesy romance and girl power triumphing, he wasn’t so worried about your health.

But he did have a few problems with Clueless. “Let me get this straight,” he said with a scowl as he held you close in between his legs. “She’s… still in high school. Sixteen, right?”

“Mmhmm.”

“And he was her step-brother?”

“Yes.”

“And… he is still treated like her step-brother by her father?”

“Yeah.”

He blinked owlishly at the television that hung up on your wall, his mouth hanging open in an astonished ‘o.’ “And people just…”

“Decide to ignore that bit? Yup,” you supplied, turning your head to look up at him.

He frowned, tightening his hold around you. “I really don’t know how to feel about that. It’s a good movie. But…” His head then slightly cocked to the side. “Her step-brother looks like that one guy that helped us at the fight in Germany… You know, the one at the airport?”

“You don’t even remember Scott’s name?!” You asked, snorting. “You really are an old man.”

His fingers flew to your sides, tickling you mercilessly. “Yeah?! And what about it?! Huh? Huh?” When he finally stopped and your laughter had died out, he hid his face in the crook of your neck and took in a deep breath. “I missed you… when you were gone… Sometimes I forget just how integral you are to my life, but that… Being without you reminded me of how desolate my days were when we were separated before.”

Heart clenching, you squeezed his flesh arm with both of yours, resolving yourself to not move the rest of the day. You’d quickly come to the conclusion that cuddling with James Barnes could be considered one of the great pleasures in life. “Well, we’ll never have to be apart again,” you murmured, closing your eyes. “What if… What if we took some time away? And we went on a little… vacation or something?”

“A vacation?” He said, and you could feel his heart rate speed up underneath your head. A vibranium hand smoothed over your hair. “Where do you wanna go?”

“I don’t know…,” you admitted with a snort, shaking your head. “Just… away. Give us time to relax and really… I don’t know. Process?” Your eyes fluttered shut at his soothing touch. “Maybe we could go up to the cabin for a few days… maybe a week…”

“Yeah? You wanna stay a whole week with just me for company?” He asked playfully, even though he felt like his spirit was soaring.

Biting your lip, you pulled your knees up to your chest until your entire body was pressed against his chest. “Could spend my whole life with just you for company, Jamie.”

He’d understand, right? He’d understand that you meant ‘I love you.’ He’d understand the words that you were trying to say but were too nervous to get out, that your throat closed up and your eyes burned because the last person you said those words to in that way had demolished your heart, your soul?

But then again, he’d been the one to teach you what those words meant in the first place. Well, the Soldat had.

Bucky’s entire face was pink, all the way to the tips of his ears, and he leaned down and kissed your forehead. “Me, too, malen’kaya.”

You reached up to run your fingers through his hair. It had grown out since his last haircut, and it was getting to be about ear length. “You know who you look like right now kinda?” You asked, an impish smile on your lips.

“Who?” He was clearly already anticipating the worst, even though he was letting his head tip forward to let you continue playing with his hair.

“Prince Kit or whatever his name is.” You were preening as your foreheads pressed together, his breathing even as you massaged his scalp. “From the new live action Cinderella.”

You can hear the smile, even though you can’t see his face. “You think I look like a prince?”

“Don’t get cocky on me now,” you shot back. But, in truth… You liked this side of Bucky. You had caught little glimpses of it when you were on the run with Steve, Sam, and Natasha. But this felt like the real him, and you loved it.

And as far as you were concerned, he could be as cocky as he wanted to be.

“Let me check with your doctors and get their opinion on when they think you’ll be okay to travel,” he said, his lips pressing to your hair. “And then I’ll talk to Pepper about letting us steal the cabin for a bit…”

A huff escapes your lips as you tug on his hair in retaliation. “Do you really think Pepper isn’t gonna let us stay there for a bit?”

You missed the way his breathing had hitched and his heart had skipped a beat, and he nuzzled into your hair to hide himself even more. “No, but it’s still nice to ask, you heathen.”

“Soldat, where are we going?” You asked curiously as you were led out of your ballet class, your hair still pulled back into a tight bun. “What’s going on?”

“No time to talk. We have a mission,” he said sternly, his voice deep and gravelly.

A mission?

You’d never been on a mission.

“Wait, are we leaving the Red Room?” You asked, glancing at the handlers that flanked the both of you. “Where are we going?”

“Do you understand the phrase ‘no time to talk?’” The Soldat asked with a snort, shooting you a glare.

Something was off.

The Soldat and you had been training together for over two years now, almost three, and you’d never gone on a mission.

Also, he never spoke so harshly unless there was something wrong or there were others present, and the handlers around you weren’t important enough for him to put up the mean teacher facade. No, there was something else going on.

Two hulking doors were waiting at the end of the hallway, leading to the outside world. Snow was swirling outside, frost painting the windows.

And you were still in just your leotard and tights. Fuck.

Of course, they weren’t gonna give you time to change.

You hadn’t even been outside of the Red Room since you were a toddler. Hell, you didn’t even own any cold weather clothes.

The doors opened, and you let out a sharp gasp as the icy cold wind hit you. In your peripheral, you could see the Soldat look at you and immediately move to take off his jacket, before remembering who was around and stopping himself.

It was a nice thought, knowing that if he could, he’d warm you.

Maybe you could daydream about him scooping you up, holding you in his lap… He’d run his fingers over your hair, his other hand smoothing up and down your back. That deep, gravelly voice you loved so much would murmur sweet things to you, his lips tickling your ear…

God, your little crush was getting out of hand.

Snow covered your hair as you were led out to a van that was waiting for you, smoke coming out of the exhaust pipe as the headlights shone through the dense white landscape. One of the handlers shoved your head down as you were pushed into the back seat, the Soldat following right after. A thich, kevlar covered thigh pressed against yours as you settled in. Pretending to not be cold was becoming a lot harder than you thought it would be.

“So… What exactly are we doing?” You asked tentatively after about ten minutes of terse silence.

“You’re our bait,” one of the men said simply, cocking his gun.

Ice cold water ran down your spine as you blinked at him. “Bait? What… What do you mean?” You could feel the Soldat’s thigh tense beside you, and you realized that he had known.

That’s why he’d been so cold, even beyond the fact that there were others present.

“It means you’re going to be bait,” another man said with an eye roll.

“Well, I mean… When you say bait, do you mean like bait that can be reused so you keep it alive or bait like a worm that ends up dead on a hook?” You said, your arms crossed over your chest. Being sarcastic probably wasn’t the best thing you could do at the moment, but whatever. If you were gonna die, you might as well die with a few good one-liners.

Beside you, the Soldat’s chest jolted, his lips pressed together as though he was trying to stifle a laugh.

See, you knew he’d get your humor immediately.

“Guess we’ll just have to see how well you behave,” the first man snapped, his voice threatening.

When you finally arrived at your location, it was several hours later, and you’d passed out, your head lolling back against the seat. You jolted awake when the van stopped, realizing that the sun had set. “Where are we?”

No answer.

“Great talk.” One of the handlers yanks you out of the van, pulling you over the Soldat’s lap and almost dislocating your shoulder in the process. “Fuck! You didn’t have to manhandle me, you asshole!” You’re not shocked when his hand meets your cheek, though you do have to take a moment to take a breath. “Can you just tell me what I have to do so I can do it and we can leave?”

The mission is simple enough, at least on your end. Apparently, there were a few vigilantes running around that Hydra needed gone.

And what vigilante doesn’t love a young damsel in distress?

It’s over before you realize, and you’re hit with a deep realization.

You had wanted the vigilantes to win, just for a second or two. You had wanted them to win and maybe you’d get to go somewhere where you weren’t almost killed everyday, where you were handcuffed to your bed each night, and where most meals consisted of protein shakes.

But only if it meant the Soldat could be rescued with you.

“We’re not going back tonight?” You asked in surprise when the van pulled up to a seedy motel.

“No,” one of the men said with an eye roll. “Don’t feel like driving.”

You were left alone in the car with the Soldat as the men went to get a room, but you didn’t mind. “Are you okay?” You asked softly, eyes flickering up to meet his.

The man grunted, his lips pressed into a thin line as he kept his face forward, watching for the men to come back. But his hand slowly moved down his thigh until you felt cool metal, and his pinky linked around yours.

It stays there until the men come back, and he lets go at the right second, as the van door is starting to open.

“Come on,” one of the men grumbled, leading you two down the length of the motel. “This is where you two will be staying,” he said as he opened up a door.

Brows furrowing, you looked up at him. “What? Alone?” They trusted you like that? You were going to be staying the night with your crush in a room alone?

“Just don’t get her pregnant. She won’t go through graduation for another few months,” another one taunted, letting out a loud, obnoxious laugh. They all looked the same, and sounded the same. Like Hydra had created a bunch of clones. “And you know what to do if she tries to escape, Soldat.”

There was a rock in the pit of your stomach as you walked into the room.

The men had left you alone with the Soldat because they thought he’d have sex with you.

They thought he’d already had sex with you, despite the fact that you were just seventeen.

And your Soldat wasn’t like that. Despite the fact that you were (admittedly) in love with him, and despite the fact that you’d heard of the other Soldats having… pleasure women, you knew that he’d never touch you.

Not like that.

That was the only thing that relaxed you as you walked into the room and the door shut behind the hulking man, a dim yellow light casting shadows all around the room.

“I’m not—”

“I know,” you said as you turned to him, cutting him off. “I know you’re not going to… do that. I trust you.”

He slowly nodded, a weak smile spreading over his lips, and it occurred to you that it was possible that no one had ever told him that they trusted him.

At least there were two beds, because you didn’t think your little heart could handle sleeping so close to him. God forbid you wake up cuddling him. You’d be absolutely mortified.

“I’m gonna grab a shower,” you said, pointing to the bathroom. You didn’t wait for a response before speeding over and shutting and locking the door. Fuck. You were gonna have to sleep in your leotard since you didn’t have any other clothing with you.

The shampoo and conditioner the motel provided smelled like nothing, and the body wash and face wash were the same. Even so, you took your time lathering and scrubbing and washing, taking a shower that was longer than five minutes or so for the first time.

It had been over an hour by the time you got out, every inch of your body scrubbed and then scrubbed again. It probably wasn’t good for your hair, but you washed it twice, just because you could.

What you were most surprised by was the few suitcases that were on the bed closest to the inside wall when you got out, redressed in your leotard.

“What is this?” You asked the Soldat, who had stripped out of his leather and kevlar and was just wearing his cargo pants and a white shirt.

“You didn’t have clothes,” he said bluntly, glancing over at you as he sharpened his knife on the cheap chair.

“Where did you get these?”

“Lost and found. I just grabbed a few in case one didn’t have what you needed.”

Sometimes you forgot just how caring he could be in little ways.

“Thank you,” you said with a grateful smile as you moved to dig through them, eventually moving to the bathroom to change into a fresh pair of underwear and a huge t-shirt and shorts. “How do I look?” You asked as you came out, striking a dramatic pose.

The ghost of a smile appeared on his lips as he looked up at you. “Radiant,” he said after a moment, having thought of the perfect word. “You always are.”

Why the hell did he have to say such things when you knew you couldn’t be with him? You were too young, and the likelihood of Madame B allowing you to be together was… zero.

He motioned for you to get in the bed farthest away from the window. “You need rest, malen’kaya. I will keep watch.” After watching you crawl under the blankets and cuddle up to your pillows, he moved to sit on the bed, caressing your cheek. “Sleep… I will be here when you wake…”

“Sometimes I forget just how fucking beautiful it is out here,” Bucky said with a breathy laugh as he pulled up the long drive to the Stark Cabin. The sun was glittering out on the lake, the leaves just beginning to turn shades of ruby and gold. He threw the car into park and rushed around to your side to open the door and help you out before you could even blink.

The look you gave him didn’t do much as you placed your hand in his. It had only been a few days since he’d even let you get out of bed on your own and walk around.

As much as you loved him carrying you around like a blushing bride, it became a bit much when he was carrying you to the bathroom because you had to pee.

“It feels like so long ago… last time we were here,” you said as you watched him grab your bags.

He barely let you walk, there was no way in hell he’d let you carry your own duffel bag.

“What are you feeling for dinner?” He asked as he led you inside, setting your bags on the couch for the time being. “I was thinking maybe I could whip up some of that creamy chive chicken I made the other week? You liked that, right?” Bucky seemed to have a nervous energy running through him as he moved to the kitchen and began to figure out what they had. “I’ll need to have some groceries delivered…”

“Anything’s good with me,” you said faintly as you watched him, leaning against the doorway. “I’m really glad we decided to do this… It feels nice… getting away from everything for a little bit…” Your cheeks flushed as you glanced at the ground, arms crossing over your chest. “I mean… I love our family. You know I do. But—”

“It can get loud and crowded,” he finished, a kind smile on his face. “I get it.”

There’s a light inside your chest as you move further into the kitchen, giggling as his hands immediately go to your waist and lift you up onto the counter. “I knew you would.”

Bucky glanced up from his phone, having put in the grocery order faster than you expected. His vibranium hand rested on your thigh, and he gave a gentle squeeze. “You in the mood for a drink while we wait on dinner supplies?”

“Depends, bartender. What are you making?” You asked, letting your legs kick back and forth. You had to do something to prevent yourself from wrapping your legs around his waist and pulling him close.

Would he ravish you like in the dreams you sometimes occasionally but totally-not-often had?

“Baby doll, I can make whatever magic potion you want,” he said, winking. His lips found a place on your cheek, letting it linger before he left your side, his hand leaving behind a warm spot on your thigh that felt empty without it. The way he moved around the cabin, so confidently, was such a far cry from when you’d been spending a few days in the guest rooms after the final battle.

It was fucking hot.

You were barely paying attention as he listed off cocktails and various concoctions.

“Malen’kaya? You there?” He called out, though you didn’t really hear him as he said your name.

It wasn’t until a floorboard creaked under his weight that you focused back in on the present. “Huh? Just… whatever you think I’ll like. I trust you,” you said, rubbing your hands nervously on your thighs.

“You okay?”

“Yeah,” you said as your tongue wetted your lower lip.

“Okay, if you say so,” he said as he glanced back at you with a fond smile, his blue eyes sparkling with mirth. “And… I agree.”

Your head tilted to the side. “Agree about what?”

“I’m really glad we decided to do this.”

[scapegrace74-blog]

New Ways of Turning into Stone, Chapter 4

A/N  Some strong reactions to the last chapter, which I admit caught me by surprise.   Writing is a funny craft, where you spend a lot of time and effort trying to show your reader exactly the picture you have in your mind, but then also have to surrender to each reader’s interpretation of what you wrote.  That said, some interpretations miss the mark entirely, and for that reason this chapter is entitled “False Assumptions”.   Trigger warning for childhood disease.

Jamie’s weekly appointments continued through the grey slumber of late April and into the wakening month of May.  Thursday became Claire’s favourite day of the week, for reasons she didn’t care to scrutinize too closely.

With regularity came a certain brand of predictability.  Their appointments took one of two forms, she realized.  Some days Jamie was full of life, witty and exasperating by turns.  He would spin long yarns about some trivial aspect of his life, fascinating tales that turned out to be nothing more than surface reflections, revealing little of the murky depths beneath.  He was also adept at using his considerable verbal charm to draw her into divulging more about herself than she ought.  Those visits left her equally frustrated and challenged.

The rest of the time her patient arrived with a weary slump, the thousand watt bulb of his personality dimmed to an occasional flicker.  Given his offhand comment about whisky and women, she tried not to ponder if he was hungover or suffering from the effects of an all-night hook-up.  From a diagnostic point of view these days of low ebb were beneficial because Jamie was far more likely to offer some nugget of inner revelation, truth sneaking out through the cracks of his weakened defences.

“I was away on business, in Hong Kong, when my Da passed,” he said on one such afternoon, the skin below his eyes drawn tight and the copper in his hair somehow muted.

“Did it happen suddenly?” 

“No’ really.  Jen had been at me fer months tae come hame, sayin’ that Da was workin’ himself tae death.”   Jamie looked out the window, eyes reflecting the overcast skies beyond.  “I ignored her.  Too wrapped up in my own grand self tae pay any heed.  Twas Ian, my brother-in-law, who called tae say Da had dropped in the pasture.  Massive coronary.  I caught the first flight back, but he was gone before I landed.”

She watched Jamie’s face closely as he spoke, but beyond the understandable emotion of reliving the sudden loss of a parent, he remained inscrutable.  The urge to draw him out overcame the deference she paid to Jamie’s well-defined boundaries.

“Do you think you’re to blame for his death?” she asked, half-expecting to be met with silence or a nimble deflection.

Jamie shook his head ruefully.

“Nah.  I dinna think I’m tae blame.  I ken it.  I was the only surviving son, ye see?  In the Highlands, tradition is everything, an’ a Fraser man had worked those lands fer generations.  I was only meant tae complete my studies abroad, an’ then return tae Lallybroch and take o’er from Da.  Instead, I left my sister an’ Ian tae watch o’er the farm while I played the business tycoon.”

“Is Lallybroch still in your family?” she wondered aloud, the name rolling about in her mouth like marbles.  

“Jenny and Ian couldna keep it.  I wasna well enough tae object, an’ they sold tae a developer.  It’s some kind of corporate wellness retreat now,” he finished with a distasteful grimace.

For every disclosure Jamie made, two more questions arose in its wake, like hacking away at a many-headed Hydra.  She wished she could delve further, but the chime from her computer announced the end of the session.

“Will I see you next week, Jamie?” she asked as he reluctantly rose to leave.

“Aye,” said with a sad smile.  “I’ll be here.”

***

The following Tuesday, Claire took the afternoon off work to perform an errand she’d long been avoiding.

Her departure from the Royal Hospital for Children had been so precipitous, she hadn’t filed the necessary paperwork to close her employment file.  The Human Resources department had been pestering her to complete the process for months.  The threat of holding up the transfer of her accreditation finally forced her hand.

To her great relief, the personnel offices were nowhere near the actual wards.  They lay at the end of a long white hallway broken by large windows looking into a series of meeting and activity rooms.  Her plan was to get in, sign the damn forms, and leave without running into any former colleagues or patients.   

The sun slanting into one of these sparsely furnished rooms glanced off the top of a bent head, causing it to glow like a freshly minted penny.  She stopped and stared, trying to reconcile the image of James Fraser seated in a too-small plastic chair, surrounded by a group of hospital-gowned children.

He must have caught sight of her while she stood gaping.  Running to the door before she could find the motor function to turn around, he called out joyfully from behind a blue hospital mask.

“Doctor Beauchamp!  Fancy meeting ye here.”

She mumbled something incoherent, damning herself for the blush she felt enveloping her cheeks.   Behind Jamie, a row of dewy eyes watched on.   She recognized the paper-thin skin and missing hair of chemotherapy patients, and a salty knot rose in her throat.

“Can ye spare a few minutes? Ye’re jes the pair of steady hands we need.”

She longed to decline, to disappear, to come up with a plausible excuse why she couldn’t enter that room.  Her heart thumped angrily in her chest, warning of its fragile state.

Seeing her conflict, Jamie extended a welcoming hand.

“Come, Sassenach.  The lassies would love tae meet ye.”

The space smelled of sterile laundry and sawdust.  With a habit borne of years of practice, Claire disinfected her hands in the small utility sink and donned a spare mask from the nearby dispenser, all while wondering what the hell she was doing.

The children were seated on colourful chairs arranged around a low table, its surface covered in pieces of pre-cut lumber, colourful pots of paint, a glue gun and all manner of cheap decorations such as you would find at a craft store.  The little girls ranged in age from pre-school to young teen, but they all looked at Jamie as though he’d hung the moon as he addressed them.

“Ladies, I’d like ye tae meet Doctor Beauchamp.  She’s a braw doctor but I bet she kens next tae nothing about woodwork.  Ye’ll have tae show her how it’s done.”

A chorus of nervous giggles was the only response.  Claire knew from experience that being a medical professional wasn’t going to endear her to children who spent much of their lives being essentially tortured in the name of science, hoping for some kind of miracle.

“Hello, everyone,” she waved meekly.  “You can call me Miss Claire, if you like.  Now, whatever are you doing with all this wood?”

It turned out that Jamie was supervising the construction of a half-dozen birdhouses.  He had pre-cut the lumber for easy assembly, but was assisting each girl to create a custom masterpiece that would hang outside her hospital window.  With the patience and steady manner of a primary school teacher, Jamie led the group through each step.  

A waifish girl of perhaps six sat directly to Claire’s left, her bare scalp covered by a brightly coloured bandana, offset by a huge pair of peacock-blue eyes that glimmered above her mask.  Eyes that were the mirror of the ones that visited her office every Thursday.  Something heavy settled inside her ribs.

“What’s your name, sweetie?” she asked in a low voice as she pushed an open pot of sky blue paint away from the table’s edge.  Small hands busied themselves pulling apart a package of cotton balls that looked suspiciously like the ones kept in the hospital’s supply cabinet.

“Margaret Murray, Doctor, errr, Miss Claire,” came the timid reply.  

Not Fraser, then.  But that didn’t necessarily mean anything.  She snuck a glance across the table at Jamie, who was just then teasing the youngest girl by tickling her cheeks with a fake feather.  Despite her heavy thoughts, she couldn’t help but smile.  That smile faltered when she noticed that the inside of Jamie’s elbows bore a matching set of fresh bandages.   A series of puzzle pieces tumbled into place.

Perhaps sensing the weight of her scrutiny, Jamie looked their way, whistling in admiration when he saw Maggie’s near-complete birdhouse.

“Tis a fine hame ye’ve built fer yer wee birds, Maggie.  What is all yon white fluff for?”

“Tis clouds, Uncle Jamie,” Maggie replied with the certainty of childhood.  “I dinna want the birdies tae miss the sky, even when they arenna flyin’.”

Claire watched the words hit him as surely as though they had been bullets.  A frozen gasp, a shudder that travelled the length of his body and the crest of tears that he tried valiantly to blink away.

“Aye, ye’re right, a nighean.  Any bird would be fair honoured tae sleep in yer skyhouse,” he managed to reply, voice bouldery with contained emotion.

When each birdhouse was complete and left along the window ledge to dry, Jamie set his small crew of helpers the task of clearing up the mess.   Claire stood next to him as he loaded his tools back into a small carrying case.

“Thanks for inviting me to join you, Jamie.  It was... well, it was unexpectedly wonderful,” she admitted.

“Ye’re most welcome, Doctor Beauchamp.  We couldna have managed wi’out yer steady hand manning the glue gun,” he teased.

“You’re not my patient here, Jamie.  You don’t need to use my title,” she said, a bit vexed by his formality.

“Aye, but it doesna feel right tae call ye by yer given name either.  An’ Miss Claire is jes weird.”

She had to acknowledge that he had a point.

“What was it you called me earlier?  Sassa-something?”

“Sassenach.  My Da woulda skelped my hide if he heard me call a lady by that name,” he said ruefully.

“Why, does it mean something terribly offensive?”  She was almost afraid to know, having enjoyed the delusion that Jamie felt as fondly towards her as she did towards him.

“Nah, tis jes an old-fashioned word for an English person in Scotland.  Seemed tae suit ye, is all.”  He shrugged, seemingly embarrassed by the explanation.

“Well then, Sassenach it is.  When I’m not on the clock, that is.”

Jamie’s eyes danced above his mask the way they did when he smiled, and she imagined hers replied in much the same way.  A long moment passed when nothing was said, neither of them looking away.

“You’re her platelet donor,” she said at last.  “Maggie’s, I mean.”

“Aye.  Every week while she’s in hospital for chemotherapy.  Tis the least I can do.”

It was an explanation that fit all the facts, but one that she never would have guessed.  Jamie had always worn long sleeves to his appointments, but she was certain the weeks when he was haggard and worn out coincided with the times he was donating the litres of blood necessary to distill into the platelet concentrate that would then be injected into Maggie’s body, helping her combat the poisonous effects of her chemotherapy.

“Whisky, women and song?” she prodded, relieved and yet frustrated that his offhand comment had kept her from seeing the truth.  “Why didn’t you just tell me, Jamie?”

“I didna want yer pity, Sassenach.  Fer once in my life, tis no’ about me, ye ken?  I didna want ye lookin’ at me like I was some kind of hero.”

She held back her reaction that his was a textbook definition of heroism, and instead asked the next obvious question.

“Are you a compatible bone marrow donor as well?”

Jamie shook his head slowly.  Although he was a close match, he explained, it wasn’t close enough.   Maggie’s older brother, Wee Jamie, was a perfect match but the law prohibited him from becoming a donor until he was at least sixteen, in seven long years.

“We’re jes tryin’ tae buy her enough time,” he said sadly before stepping out of the room, explaining he’d be back momentarily.

Claire stood in a daze, running through everything she’d assumed about Jamie in light of these newest facts.  A light tug on her hand drew her back into the moment.  Maggie was looking up at her with wide, trusting eyes.

“Are ye the Sassenach lady Uncle Jamie and my Mam argue about?”

“I suppose I might be,” she replied, curious what had been said between the siblings that Maggie had overheard.

“Are ye a heart doctor?” Maggie continued.

“Well, no.  Not exactly.  I’m the kind of doctor who helps people who are sad, and I try to find a way for them to be happy again.”  It sounded so easy when explaining it to a six year old.

“Sometimes Mam and Da talk about Uncle Jamie when they dinna ken I’m listenin’.  I’m verra good at sneakin’,” Maggie confided, and Claire couldn’t help but smile.  What a precious child.    “I’m sure you are,” she replied warmly, a hand coming to rest gently on the tiny cloth-covered head.

“Mam says Uncle Jamie is more stubborn than a mule and that he canna see past his own big heid,” Maggie continued.  Claire couldn’t say that she disagreed with that assessment.

“But Da says Uncle Jamie’s heart has been broken too many times, and thas’ why he’s given up on living.  Can ye fix his heart, Miss Claire, so that it isna broken any more?”

She couldn’t have stopped her tears if she tried.   She knelt on the floor and gathered Maggie’s thin, fragile body in her arms.

“Oh, Maggie.  I’m certainly going to try.”

[secretlittlerandezvous]

A Day With The Benns - Jamie Benn

Summary: A look into the Benns household and a day spent with the family.

To the angel who requested this: From the bottom of my heart THANK YOU. I don't know who you are but I love you - for this request and for the beautiful words that came with it. It keeps making me feel like my heart will burst from happiness. I also thank you for giving me a reason to write about how I see my future life and what I hope for (this is basically me writing about my dream life) 💘🕊💫

Note: D/n means “daughter’s name”. The bedtime story is an excerpt from the book “Goodnight, hockey fans” by Andrew Larsen.

Words: 2487

“The truest, best love had nothing to do with luck. Luck was faithless, and worth little. True love wasn’t fancy, and it wasn’t magical, but simply true in every sense: honest, loyal and sure.” — Sonja Yoerg

It was that kind of a morning when you wake up and you know summer finally arrived. The sun was nicely warm and comforting unlike the stinging and cold winter sun, the birds were chirping in the trees from early in the morning and the air was fresh and warm. Y/n was woken up by the streaks of sunlight creeping into the bedroom through the window. She opened her eyes for a second and then closed them again and enjoyed the peace she felt which was quite unusual in the past few weeks. She didn’t hear a baby crying or the older kids running around the house wildly, she wasn’t woken up by them jumping on the bed to wake her up or by her husband leaving early for work. She loved her life and the chaos of it but it felt so nice to have a calm morning for once. After she fully enjoyed the silence, she opened her eyes, stretched her arms, and with a smile already present on her face she turned around to see her husband. Jamie had his back to her, but she certainly enjoyed the view at her husband’s muscular back and arms and she even blushed at the sight of him. But what warmed her heart, what couldn’t be beaten by his tattoos or muscles was the way he talked to their four months old baby girl. He had his arm protectively around her and Y/n found the contrast of his strong tattooed arm and her tiny little hand and fingers covered in a pink onesie absolutely adorable. He tickled her on her belly, and she smiled at him or watched him with her bright eyes with pure love. Y/n and the kids wished he could spend a little more time with them but they all understood why he couldn’t and whenever he was home he made the most of it and he dedicated his time to help his wife and to entertain the kids.

“Good morning my loves,” Y/n said happily as she looked over Jamie’s shoulder, kissed his cheek, and then smiled at their daughter who got even more excited when she noticed her.

“See? I told you mommy will wake up soon to give you a breakfast,” Jamie said to the little one. “Unfortunately, that’s the only thing I can’t do honey.” He said to Y/n and kissed her back.

“Not sure if anyone would want you to breastfeed babe,” she joked and took their daughter into her arms to feed her. “Are the kiddos awake?”

“Don’t think so,” Jamie mumbled. “I’ll go wake them up in a bit.” But first, he wanted to enjoy his wife’s company.

She was beautiful. He found her so beautiful. And he adored everything about her. Her kindness, the way she always loved him even though he could get a little grumpy sometimes. The way she handled everything with such ease. How smart she was. How supportive and understanding she was of him and his career. How she raised the kids, took care of them and their household on her own when he was away, and never used that against him. How good she was at her own job. How she created such a loving atmosphere in their family. Everything.

Jamie soon left to wake up the two older boys who even despite the complaints got out of the bed pretty quick and happily ran downstairs to help their dad in the kitchen. Y/n stayed behind a little to take care of D/n and to put herself together before she headed to the kitchen to join the rest of the pack. She heard laughter and giggles coming from there and she stopped and listened to the conversation they were having, she smiled to herself and enjoyed everything that was said.

Y/n often felt that she didn’t have enough time to pause and enjoy the present moment, but she was slowly learning to do so. The kids were growing up way too fast for her liking, life kept moving forward without a chance of it ever slowing down and she got sad at times when she realized how fast the kids will turn into adults. Y/n wanted to stay stuck in time, stay this old for a little longer and have the kids stay little longer, and have more time to process it all. But mostly she wanted a little more time off for Jamie who even though never said it out loud regretted not being there for them all the time. But they knew he loved them more than anything or anyone else in the world and that was enough.

“Can we go skating with you dad?” Their oldest son asked with hope, but he knew what answer was coming. He asked the same question, every morning when Jamie was home and about to go to practice. Each time the answer was no but he never gave up. The positive attitude towards everything and how he was never losing hope was Jamie’s favorite trait of their oldest son. It reminded him of Y/n.

“You know you can’t come with me buddy,” Jamie said with a sad voice. He hated saying no to him and he even wished he could bring the boys with him, but it was never convenient. “But I can ask the boys and we can go skating together on the weekend. What do you think?”

“I think we should hurry up,” Y/n joined the conversation, but no one heard her because the boys started screaming in excitement. She then sat down at the table and enjoyed the pancakes Jamie and the boys made for her and she helped their younger son with eating because he preferred to play with it rather than eating it. “Did you guys tell daddy where you’re going today?”

“No,” the older boy said. “We’re going to the zoo with the kindergarten.”

“And you wanted to miss the zoo to go skating? The zoo’s more fun for sure.” Jamie answered.

After the tasty breakfast, everyone headed to the bathroom to get ready for kindergarten and the day. Jamie helped them brush their teeth and hair, he even let them use a tiny little amount of his deodorant because both boys adored their dad and wanted to be just like him. It wasn’t rare for the boys to draw on their hands and pretend the drawings were real tattoos or them putting on Jamie’s hockey gear and playing hockey around the house. Y/n in the meantime prepared their outfits, soothed the crying baby, and managed to get dressed up without being disturbed.

“I’ll drop the kids at the kindergarten,” Jamie whispered as he wrapped his hands around Y/n’s waist from behind and hugged her tightly. “And I’ll try to get back home sooner than usual, and we can then do something fun.”

“Aren’t you amazing?” Y/n said happily, turning around to face Jamie, wrapping her hands around his neck, and kissing him before he got to answer. She expected a cocky answer from him, and she wanted to avoid it.

A few minutes later the whole family was outside their house, all of them about to head in different directions to different places. The boys were going to the kindergarten, Jamie to the arena and Y/n and D/n were going for a regular check-up at the doctor. “I love you boys,” said with a proud face and kissed all three boys goodbye.

“And we love you girls,” Jamie said, kissed Y/N and their daughter and the boys repeated after him before they all jumped into the car.

Later that day after Y/n returned home from the doctors and the grocery store, she cooked lunch for herself and then picked up the boys from the kindergarten. They then went for a walk around the neighborhood to put D/n to sleep in her stroller and the boys being the amazing brothers argued about who was gonna push the stroller. Y/n felt joy in her heart she couldn’t describe. She was simply proud of how loving the boys were.

When Jamie returned home, 2 hours earlier than usual, he expected to find his pack in the living room and he secretly hoped they would greet him, but the house was empty. He went to the living room and that’s when he finally found Y/n and the kids. They were in the garden enjoying the warm weather and the sunshine, eating some fruit, and playing with way too many things but they seemed to be enjoying. Jamie watched them from behind the glass door and adored Y/n once again. She was smiling widely, she glowed and looked even prettier than usual at that moment. She was showing D/n some flowers they probably picked in their garden and D/n was from what Jamie saw laughing at it. The boys were sitting on the blankets around the girls, their younger son was drawing something (and judging from the dozens of papers lying around it wasn’t his first artwork that day) and the older son was playing the puzzles while telling Y/n some exciting story. She listened carefully to every word and looked at the kids with so much love and adoration that Jamie wondered how he could get so lucky.

“Dad!” The younger boy screamed when Jamie came to the garden and both boys happily ran towards him to hug him.

“When you said you were gonna come home earlier I didn’t expect it would be this early,” Y/n said to Jamie as he sat down next to her. “But I’m not complaining. I missed you.”

“Missed you too love,” Jamie whispered as he leaned closer to kiss her and he then picked up D/n and took her in his arms to cuddle with her. Jamie was such a great dad and Y/n always knew he would be even though Jamie used to call himself a boy dad and say that he wouldn’t know what to do with a girl. But the moment they found out their next baby was going to be a girl he changed his mind completely and couldn’t wait to have a daughter. And from the second she was born she had him wrapped around her finger. “If you want you can go take a nap, I’ll stay there with the kids. I know you didn’t get much sleep.” Jamie offered.

At the first moment, she wanted to accept the offer and go to bed but when she looked around, she changed her mind. The sky was still blue, the sun was still shining, and the kids were having way too much fun and there was no way she was gonna miss this moment with her whole family. “I think I’ll stay right here.” She said with a smile.

The family stayed in the garden until the sun disappeared from the sky and just when the air got significantly colder, they all realized it was time to head home and have dinner. Neither one of them wanted to move because they were having so much fun but all of them were hungry and tired after a long day. The boys happily helped Y/n with dinner and although it took a little longer and the kitchen was a little messier than if Y/n did it on her own she enjoyed it as any other activity with her loves. Dinner was a favorite time of the day in the Benn family because it was usually the time when they all gathered and spent time together. For Y/n it was a time where she finally had everyone home and that was when she felt best even if it meant Jamie would leave for a game later. Jamie loved it because he was finally home with the ones most important to him and nothing could ever compare to the warmth of being home with his family. The kids loved dinner just as any other time they would get to eat but even they knew it meant they would most likely be all together.

“Dad? Can you read to us tonight?” One of the boys asked Jamie after the dinner.

“Of course!” Jamie answered with excitement. “Go brush your teeth and I’ll be there in a second okay?”

The boys listened and ran upstairs to their bathroom to brush their teeth and put on their pajamas and quickly jumped to bed and waited for Jamie. Jamie soon left Y/n alone in the living room so she could feed the baby in peace and went to the boys’ room.

“Alright, boys, ready?” Jamie asked the boys as he sat down with the book the boys picked. It was their favorite book about hockey that Jamie got them when they were younger and both Jamie and Y/n lost track of the number of times they read it to them. “A young boy doesn't want to go to bed. The hockey game is on! ‘What if I can't fall asleep?’ the boy says. ‘Don't worry,’ says his dad. ‘You will.’ After his parents have tucked him in and turned out the light, he shines a flashlight on his prized hockey possessions around his room: the posters of his favorite players, the pennant for his favorite team, the puck.” Jamie read. Not for too long though, the boys well asleep after a few minutes. “Good night boys,” Jamie said quietly as he left the room.

Y/n just finished putting D/n to sleep when Jamie walked into their bedroom. “That was quick,” Y/n noted.

“Told you I have a talent at putting the kids to sleep.” He said with a grin. “Abd good night to my little princess.” He whispered and kissed his little girl gently on her forehead before Y/n put her into her crib.

“You’re just lucky,” Y/n answered.

“I am,” Jamie said with a proud smile as he looked at his wife. He knew he was lucky. He hardly ever told this to his family, but he knew they knew he loved them more than anything. “And now I can finally focus purely on you.” He announced when he got out of the shower and went to Y/n.

“This was one of the nicest days in a while Jamie,” Y/n snuggled to Jamie and traced Jamie’s tattoos mindlessly. “Oh, and you better don’t forget to take the kids skating on the weekend. They were talking about it all day.” She laughed.

“I told the team and they all agreed to hang out,” he said. “And now give me a big kiss.” He said seriously.

“You’re horrible,” Y/n laughed before she kissed him. No matter how annoying and cocky he could get she loved him with all her heart.

[thebrochtuarachs]

Something in the Rain - “Finding Solid Ground”

A/N:  Hi all! This chapter has been in the drafts for quite sometime now but I only had the time to pick up the writing. Thank you so much for your patience with my slow updates but rest assured, I absolutely love this story and daydream about the chapters ahead. As always, your comment and suggestions help a lot moving this story forward. Hope you all are keeping safe and healthy! Till the next one!

AO3  / C1: A Day In June : C2: Definitely, Maybe : C3: So We Meet Again : C4: Friday Lunch

XXXXX

She was 45 minutes late.

Claire was running as fast as she could, catching some curious eyes on her as she raced towards Mrs. Kim’s Korean Street Food Hub to hopefully, still catch Jamie for their lunch.

She got off from her morning surgery quite late due to some complications but she still went as courtesy and because, in all honesty, she still wanted to see him. Their last encounter kind of left them in an awkward place and she was hoping that this meeting could help clarify some things. She has been waiting for this all week but alas, life (and medicine) had other plans.

Claire entered the store and knew instantly that he wasn’t there. The place was empty after the lunch rush and she sighed in disappointment.

“Claire!” Mrs. Kim suddenly called out. “This is for you, left by your friend”, she said while handing her a piece of paper.

“Thank you” Claire replied, opening it on spot.

Hi Claire,

Sorry, I left before you arrived but I have to get back to the office. Don’t worry about the wait, I really don’t mind but I just have a packed schedule today.

Forgive me if this is too forward but here’s my number. No pressure! Just figured we can text or call whenever is a better time to catch up. Just hit me up when you feel like it and I’ll be on the other line.

I do hope to hear from you soon. If not, I’ll be here next Friday, same time :)

Jamie

Claire did not waste any more time and punched in Jamie’s mobile number to call. After three rings, he answered.

“Hello?”

“Jamie? It’s me, Claire.”

“Claire, hi! I see you got my note.”

“I did. I am so sorry. My surgery ran a little bit long and…”

“Don’t worry, I figured that must be it.” he said cheerfully, cutting her off before she went into a long explanation. “I mean, you save lives and all, couldn’t be angry about that.”

Claire sighed relief on the other line and couldn’t believe just how understanding he is. So understanding that she’s starting to wonder if he’s even real. She hasn't really met anyone that chivalrous and it captures her.

“Oh, wow. Thank you - and thank you for the note and your number. My guilt would’ve eaten me alive if I couldn’t apologize to you.”

“You don’t think it was too forward?”

“No, not at all. To be honest, I was going to ask it last week before we got, erm, interrupted.”

“Well, that’s good to know. And in any case, I would’ve given it.” Jamie said.

She could hear his smile from the other line and she couldn’t help but smile too.

“Anyhow,” Claire followed. “I am so sorry I missed you today. To make up for it, would you happen to be doing anything tomorrow?”

“Hmm, let me check." Jamie checked his board calendar. "Nope, my weekend is free. Anything you had in mind?”

“Well, if you’re up for it, I’d like to invite you to the center tomorrow, see what we’re doing with the kids. Fair warning though, they get a little rowdy sometimes.”

“I’m game! Text me the details and what time to meet you.”

“Really? Great! Sure, I’ll text you the details in a bit”

“Will wait for it. Claire, sorry to cut this short but I have to run to a meeting. I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Oh no, please. Go ahead. I’ll see you tomorrow, Alright, bye!”

-

It was a Saturday, two weeks since their encounter by the crossing, and now she’s waiting for him to arrive and bring him to one of the most special places for her.

Claire hadn’t absolutely thought through what inviting Jamie to the center would mean. Reflecting on yesterday, a part of Claire thought she may have panicked and this invite might’ve been a mistake. On another end was a part of her that was excited to see him and if she was really being honest, spend time with him, and show her the work they have been doing.

She had told her their meeting story and the extended invite to her friends and staff but left out the part about their lunches. She messaged the team on WhatsApp about their upcoming guest and her inbox has blown with messages asking her for more details about the man himself. She messaged that they’ll be able to find out for themselves tomorrow when they meet him and turned off her phone.

“Claire?” Deep in thought she hadn’t seen or hear Jamie arrive. “You okay?”

“Yeah, sorry. Spaced out there for a bit” she embarrassingly admitted.

“A penny for your thoughts?” Jamie asked as Claire pointed the way in.

“Erm, nothing much. Just thinking about giving you fair warning about everyone upstairs. They’re quite curious about you, Jamie Fraser.” she said jokingly the half truth.

Jamie got a bit nervous suddenly and Claire felt it. “Don’t worry about it, I’ll save you if they get too rowdy. Be ready to answer questions though." She said, smiling, hoping to ease his thoughts.

“Is any topic off limits? Should I not mention anything to them?”

“I leave it to you. But if you ask me, just be yourself and charm everyone away”

Jamie chuckled and Claire turned to him. “What?”

“You think I’m charming?”

Claire laughed and smacked him in the arm. “Oh, bug off!”

“I’ll take that as a yes”

“Anyway!” Claire interrupted. “Today’s event is just art and crafts and a story session. The rest, the kids can do and play how ever they like. I usually just play with any kid who asks me to and time just flies and suddenly, the afternoon is done.”

“Got it. I honestly hope I can help more than distract or whatever”

“Pssh, you’ll be fine, Jamie. You’ll be fine”

--

The moment the elevator doors opened, a line of people greeted Jamie and Claire at the entrance.

“Hello, everyone” Claire greeted but to her surprise, no one spoke or moved. Everyone was just looking at Jamie. “This is Jamie. Jamie Fraser, our guest for today”

She ushered them closer to the stunned group and began to introduce them one by one.

Mary, the receptionist and admin assistant.

Mrs. Graham, the secretariat and head of operations.

Joe, also a surgeon from Claire’s hospital.

Frank, the history professor he’d met a week earlier.

Geilis, a botanist and herbalist.

“It’s nice to meet you all. Thank you for having me this afternoon.” Jamie said and it was only then that the ice was broken.

“Hi, Jamie was it? Can I call you Jamie?” Mrs. Graham prodded.

“Yes, Mam”

“Alright, this way. Let me show you around”

As Mrs. Graham swept Jamie away for a short tour, the rest of the group crowded Claire with questions.

“Okay, he is even more handsome than in the pictures!” Geilis excitedly said.

“Pictures?” Claire asked.

“Ugh, I sometimes forget you’re a doctor who needs to catch up to the times” Geilis pinched her nose jokingly. “Jamie was named one of Scotland’s most eligible bachelors in a tatler magazine last year. There’s pretty striking photos of him in a tux and in casual clothes.”

“I remember that issue. Gail had one lying in the house and I happen to peruse it one time. You’re right, the pictures don’t do him justice.” Joe chimed in.

“I had no idea. I mean, I just literally bumped into the guy on the street!” Claire said, a curiosity pooling in her mind. She had to look for that magazine later.

“Such a meet-cute story. Ugh, Claire! It’s like something out of the books or movies” Geilis added.

“Psh, he seems too manly for me. I mean, who is that fit and that put together.” Frank mused.

“I think he’s quite charming” Joe added.

“If you ask me, Claire, I don’t know what’s going on between you two but keep it going” Geilis added.

“Aish, nothing is going on. I just extended a polite invite to make up for - “ Claire stopped as Jamie and Mrs. Graham arrived back, thankful for the Interruption.

“Make up for what?” Geilis asked, not missing that info.

“Oh, nothing.”

“Mhm” Geilis hummed raising an eyebrow to Claire. She’ll pull it out of her later.

---

It was a long but fun afternoon for everyone.

Afterwards, one by one, the space cleared out, the kids were picked up, saying goodbye to the staff with some even approaching and waving at Jamie as they left, leaving him with a heartwarming feeling.

“Well, another successful weekend, folks!” Frank called out and the team gave themselves applause.

“Great job to Joe and Mary for taking on the storytelling and painting sessions this afternoon and I would also like to thank our guest, Jamie, for being patient and helpful with the kids” Mrs. Graham added, earning another group applause.

“Thank ye, I hope I helped at all today but otherwise, I enjoyed today and thank ye for inviting me.” Jamie shared.

“Come join us anytime” Joe patted him on the back. “Alright, everyone, have a goodnight. See you all next week, I’ll bring Gail and Lenny along.” With that he made a way for the elevator and it was everyone’s cue to leave.

Claire approached Jamie just as he was going to her. “Well, how are you and how was it?” she asked. If she expected to spend time with Jamie, well, it didn’t happen. First, he was whisked away by Mrs. Graham. Afterwards, it was Joe asking help to build his set. Next up was Mary who got him assisting on getting and serving the food, and the rest of the time, it was kids calling out on Jamie here and there and he was more than happy to oblige.

“Fun and a little bit tiring” he replied and Claire gave a small laugh. “But in all honesty, thank ye for inviting me to come here. Made me miss my niece and nephew”

“I’m glad you had fun and I’m glad you got to see what we’re doing here.”

Jamie might be overthinking things but he knew that Claire sharing this part of her to him seems like a big thing and he intends to cherish that.

“Anyway, I’d like to offer to drive ye home...or to the nearest bus stop” he added, panicking he put her in a tight spot.

Claire paused, eyed him jokingly, intentionally making him more flush and nervous.

“I’d take that offer but” she began and Jamie swallowed the lump on his throat, “I actually live nearby so we don’t need to drive”

“Okay,” Jamie sighed in relief which Claire found very cute. “Lead the way, then”