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curseofaphrodite · 26 days ago

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Heartbreak Protection Squad

REMUS LUPIN X FEM!READER

; where your tutor Moony goes batshit chaotic at the possibility of Sirius Black liking you.

The study session at the astronomy tower never happened, and you had fallen asleep waiting for Remus. Late to class and pissed off, you hardly flinched when you saw the dark-haired man rummaging through your bag.

"Are you stealing my chocolates?" You asked in surprise.

"Good morning, love," the man, who you now recognized as Sirius Black, sounded hardly apologetic. "Remus told me you always bring your muggle snacks bag for studying. It's the only reason I'd drag my arse all the way here as his bloody messenger."

You blinked.

Your assigned tutor's assortment of friends always caught you by surprise, especially since Remus Lupin did not look like an extrovert. He was smart, sweet, and shy, but his friends shared no qualities with him or among themselves. For example — the popular Quidditch captain James, the silent Peter, and the Hogwarts heartthrob Sirius Black — who just so happened to be staring right at you.

"Did you want this back?" he asked in confusion, handing the half-eaten Mars bar to you.

"No, you can have it," you said plainly, standing up. "And I don't want to hear his stupid apology."

"Remus warned me you'd be mad." Sirius sighed. "He couldn't come last night Y/N, he wasn't standing you up."

"What, you had a date with him and he lost track of time?"

A choking sound.

"I take that as a no?" You frowned.

"I am not fucking Remus, please!" Sirius was shocked. "Though if I'm being honest, he could use a good shag."

"Too much information, Black. Tell me this, why is Remus not here apologizing? Unless..." You knotted your hands together and stared him down. "Is he at the hospital wing again?"

If Sirius looked taken aback, he didn't show it. "Why would you say that?"

"Cause almost every month, you stupid idiots run around doing pranks that get him to the hospital wing! It's not that uncommon."

"Woah, woah, he has never been injured 'cause of us. We'd never do anything that would put Moony in danger."

"Why's he there then?"

Sirius threw his hands up in frustration. "I never said he was."

You threw your bag over your shoulder, and marched right into him, only stopping when he was an inch away. Your glare sent a chill down his spine.

"You tell Lupin that I'd rather fail my exams than wait for him for anything again. I don't want to see him or his stupid friends, including you."

And with that, you were off to Minerva's class, ready to be yelled at for being late.

"How did it go?" Remus asked when Sirius waltzed back in hospital wing. The bruises were almost healed thanks to Madam Pomfrey's blueseed oil, but he still felt knocked out. Apparently, Wolf Remus took last night to be an adventure more so than usual.

"Couldn't even begin to tell her any excuse," he said, grinning wide. "She's fierier than you said. I love her."

"You what?!"

"Do you want some chocolate? I nicked some."

Remus blinked, then threw his head back into the pillow, wishing a brick would take him out right then and there.

Sirius liked Y/N? That was just a phrase. He didn't mean anything by it. Or did he?

Questions like this flew through Remus's head throughout the first two hours of class, where he would look at you sitting a few seats away, then at Sirius. It was confusing really, but Remus felt a pang of annoyance every time the former laughed too loud or cracked a joke, all of which he usually does.

Out of everyone who could have liked Y/N, why did it have to be him? With his perfect smile and flirting, girls adored him. And all of them regretted it a month or two after, because that's when their relationship usually ends. Sirius wasn't a player, he had far too much heart to ever be one — but he never finds the right person to date. It goes from a Slytherin who's a bit too mean, Quidditch players too dedicated to the game, or one of the many admirers who only liked him for his popularity.

Sirius Black broke their heart one by one, and Remus knew you weren't going to be different.

In short, you can never date him, Remus decided firmly. He knew you were capable of dealing with these things, but he was just starting to get close to you, and what kind of tutor would he be if his best friend broke your heart? Wouldn't you hate him?

I'm such a good friend, he thought to himself, oblivious as ever.

Remus found you next to the Black Lake that afternoon. He breathed a sigh of relief when he saw you were alone, and he sprinted over before you could disappear.

"Go away Remus," you said, hardly taking your eyes up from the book you were reading.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I had other plans and I should have told you. It slipped my mind, I swear," he began blabbering.

You sighed. "Because of you, I got an 3 out of 25 on my test and McGonagall took off points from Gryffindor for being late."

"She does that with everyone! I forgive you on behalf of all Gryffindors." His words were so fast that they were a blur. If you forgive me first, of course. I'm truly, terribly, incredibly sorry, Y/N."

You finally met his gaze, and your heart did a little flutter at how soft he looked at you right then.

"You look bruised again, Lupin."

"No!" He whined, snatching the book from you when you looked back down again. You let out a cry of protest. "Don't make us go back to last-name basis again! I love having you as my friend!"

Remus cringed at how cheesy that sounded, and he regretted ever opening his mouth, but the crease between your forehead had finally cleared out. You were almost holding back a smile.

"The girl you hang out with, Sarah? Is she seeing anyone?" he asked, before he could lose his confidence.

You were caught off guard.

"Uhm, no? Why, do you like her?" you asked, trying to keep that hint of bitterness at bay.

"What no, James likes her," Remus said plainly. He wasn't meeting your eyes, like he was lying. Or hiding something.

"Sarah and James?"

"You don't think it'll work out?"

"No, it might but—"

"And, I want to apologize if Sirius was making you uncomfortable in the morning." He was watching you closely now, hardly blinking.

"Uncomfortable?"

"He's very flirty with everyone he sees."

"Oh," you furrowed your eyebrows. "Well, he didn't say anything that crossed the line. He was quite nice to me, don't worry."

"Nice?" Remus sat up straighter. His plan to be cautious went right out the window. "Do you like him then?"

"Excuse me?"

"It's alright if you do. Everyone does! I sometimes think he wouldn't have gotten so many Exceeds Expectations if he didn't give the professors compliments all the time."

"Wait—"

"You like him, don't you?"

"I didn't know this was an interrogation!" you said, putting the book down. "Now that I think about it, James would never go after Sarah, not as long as Lily is alive and breathing."

"Look, it's none of my business." His eyebrows scrunched up in a cute frown. "Actually, it is. Sirius is my best friend and he would fuck a troll if he could get the chance—"

You stood up, eyes flaring. "You did not just compare me to a troll!"

Remus looked alarmed. "Of course I didn't! I just meant I should know if my best friend was eating your—"

He couldn't finish his sentence because you had already aguamenti-ed water on his face. It got into his mouth and he was busy coughing it out to notice you were leaving.

"Asshole." You said under your breath.

"Chocolates!" He yelled, but to no avail. "I meant eating your chocolates Y/N, for fuck's sake!"

Remus had an entire day to himself to realize just how much he fucked up. But the nail in the coffin came about half past six, when James found him in library.

"Don't forget about Padfoot's surprise party tonight!" he said, easing his hand around Remus's shoulders. "I'm not sure if it's still a surprise when he's already deciding what to wear though."

"Ah yes, the party for his birthday that's almost a month away." Remus sounded bitter, then instantly felt bad about it. Sirius was one of his best friends, and he wasn't about to be sour on his birthday party just because of a girl.

"Okay, what's this about?" James asked, catching on.

"No, it's not Sirius- I have to sort some shit with Y/N and it's been bothering me." Remus confessed, sighing.

"Girl trouble," he tsk-ed. "It doesn't matter, you'll definitely see her at his party."

Remus stopped fidgeting with his pages. "Why're you so sure?"

"I saw him personally invite her. Only Sirius Black could be this loud about his own surprise party."

"Why is he suddenly interested in Y/N? Why does it matter to him if she's there?"

"Woah, woah," James looked at him closely. "Are you jealous?"

Remus paled under his friend's gaze. Jealous? Him?

"I don't think Sirius likes her," He continued matter-of-factly. "And even if he does, he'll never go after someone you like. Just tell him if you do."

Do I like Y/N L/N?

"Is there booze at the party?" Remus asked, giving up on his intricate thoughts.

"Is it a party if there isn't?"

"Then I'm definitely there."

James smiled. He didn't know what was going on with his friend, but he certainly didn't mind his sudden party-going spirit.

Gryffindor tower looked ten times crowded than usual. It seemed like the whole of Hogwarts had known the password to their dorm (which just for tonight, Fat Lady had agreed on "Sirius Black's Long Luscious Hair"), and the decorations brightened the place up even more.

Remus made his way further inside with James. He loved how the place looked so muggle-like, with muggle rock music and cheap beer all around, but he could hardly find James walking in front of him, let alone you.

"MOONY!" Sirius appeared at his shoulder, holding out a drink. He had no shirt on, something all the girls and a few guys were eyeing — like he had cheesecake plastered over his abs. "You're here!"

Someone accidentally knocked the drink Sirius was holding out, and it splashed all over Remus's sweater. Something in him suddenly got very angry, and the sticky liquor down his body didn't help the cause. You could have anyone he wanted. How dare you make a move on Y/N without clearing it with me first? You're supposed to be my best friend!

"Where is she?" he asked, eyes blazing.

"Which she?" Sirius asked in return, winking.

Remus Lupin snapped.

Before knowing what he was doing, he shrieked, a sound so loud everyone could hear it over the music — and he pounced.

A very confused Sirius fell to the ground with his friend on top of him. Remus didn't know any fighting techniques, nor did he want to hurt his friend, but he had to take the frustration out somehow. He took off his jacket and started slapping Sirius's chest with it.

"Owh, what are you doing?" he asked, not knowing whether to be alarmed or fighting back.

"STOP BEING NAKED ALL THE TIME!" Remus yelled, with a final smack to his friend's head. "STAY AWAY FROM Y/N! HAPPY FREAKIN BIRTHDAY, YOU WHORE!"

James, who was watching the scene unfold, laughed loudly. The sound brought Remus back to reality, about how ridiculous his reaction was, and how it looked more childish than manly.

Sirius pushed him off, and stood up groggily. The audience around the two of them were openly sniggering. The former groaned and pulled Remus by his arm until they were both on the staircase, with people who didn't mind them because they weren't witnesses to their Saturday Night Live routine from below.

"ARE YOU HIGH?!" Sirius yelled.

Remus was still breathing heavily. "I'm sorry for calling you a whore."

"No, you're not."

"No, I'm not."

Sirius rolled his eyes. "Do you want to catch me up on speed here?"

Remus hesitated, then told him about how he felt it weird that one of his best friends liked someone he have feelings for, how he didn't want you to get involved in his classic heartbreak drama. Sirius had his mouth wide open by the end of it.

"It's not my business if you like her," Remus concluded, stuttering through his words, knowing he didn't mean any of it. "But if she goes out with you, you cannot treat her like one of your other girls. She deserves better than that."

"Who. In. The. World. Said. I bloody LIKED HER??"

"You—?"

"That's a phrase! I like her does not mean I want to go out with her!" Sirius appeared disheveled. "She was bold and looked like she might knock my lights out with one punch! I was admiring her, not bloody wanting to fuck her!"

Remus's face drained of color. "James said you invited her—"

"She said something about a fight between you two. I invited her 'cause I knew you'd never miss out on my party! I thought you could talk it out here! Oh my god, you really do think I'm a whore."

"I—" Remus had never been at a loss of word like this before. He was embarrassed with a capital E.

"Come on! I'm getting you beside Y/N right now before you start sprouting more nonsense."

"DO NOT TELL HER ABOUT THIS!"

"How you physically assaulted me in my own party for her? You're right I'm telling her — now, where is she?"

Sirius was sweet, but he looked rattled for good reason. Remus did the smart thing and slipped away from him while he was looking around for you. He didn't know where he was going, but he climbed up the stairs.

The rules were simple.

Spin the bottle had its own take this time. There were serious couples in the group, so instead of kissing whoever the bottle landed on, there was one moderator who spinned all the turns. The one it landed on had the option to kiss whoever they wanted, including their partners.

Yes, it was boring.

So far the odds of the bottle spinning to you were low to none, because the group was that huge, and you had only signed up for it because it had Lily. She was the only sober friend you had at the party, and you didn't want to end up being close to a bunch of knackered out Ravenclaws on your own.

You glanced at the door to see a familiar wave of brown hair. Remus?

"You know Sirius may not like her," James whispered in Remus's ear. "But any guy in that circle would be kissing her if the bottle lands on them."

"Where the hell did you come from?" Remus asked, annoyed. "You've got to stop acting like a ghost."

"Look at her," James went on, ignoring him. "She doesn't know the minute it lands on some drunk guy, she's gonna wish she never came to the party."

"Shut up," Remus said, taking a drink from the nearby table. He downed it in one go and kept watching over the game.

He didn't notice your eyes gazing over to him every few minutes.

Should I go now and apologize? No, he should apologize first. Why's he just standing there? Does he want an apology first for the water I splashed on his face which he absolutely deserved?

The bottle had previously landed on the girl to your right, and she was passionately making out with her best friend. All the guys were watching with open mouths.

Remus had no right to interrogate me like that. As if I'd go after Sirius, when at least three of my friends had their heart broken by him! Besides, if I'd have my heart broken, it would be with that idiot himself but he's too dense to realize that.

"Y/N!" Lily pulled you out of your thoughts.

"What?" you asked, looking down quickly to see whether the bottle was pointing at you. You sighed in relief when you realized it wasn't.

"Uhm," she pointed at the bottle again. You followed her line of gaze and saw the guy it was pointing at.

The same drunk guy who had been ogling at you the whole night.

"Told you," James said, nodding towards the guy leaning over the group to Y/N, who was now frozen.

Remus felt an unexplainable anger for the tenth time that night. He took another shot from the passerby, then without hearing James's protests, walked over to the group.

He realized with disgust that the guy was already puckering up, while you were still frozen in shock. How can anyone see that expression and think they're comfortable in the current situation?

With just three drinks in, Remus's head was already floating around so he did the only solution he could think of at that moment.

He flew in front of you and met his own lips with the guy's. The latter's eyes flew open and let out a cry of alarm, pushing himself backward.

"LUPIN!" you yelled in shock.

"Thought he wanted to kiss!" Remus let his hands up, but you had already stood up.

"Oh my god." You pulled him up by his shirt, then led him away from the shocked crowd. "Hope you liked the show!" You said to James on your way out.

"Oh, I loved it," he replied over his shoulder. You groaned when you realized he might have recorded the whole thing.

"Just what did you think you were doing?" you started once you were out of everyone's earshot. "First you say I want to fuck your friend, then you follow me around like a stalker!"

Before Remus could protest, you had enveloped him in a hug. He was taken aback. He didn't question it, just hugged you right back.

"Thank you," you murmured when you pulled apart, though you still sounded mad somewhere. Remus thought you sounded adorable.

"Anytime, though I'd appreciate if you don't bring yourself to a position where I have to kiss a guy to save you again." His grin faltered. "I'm sorry. About Sirius. I know you don't like him, I was a jerk."

You gave him a thorough look over. "You smell like beer. Cheap beer."

"Is that a code? Am I forgiven?"

"Come on, I'll get you back to your dorm." You said, shrugging. "I'll make you a really disgusting hangover cure tomorrow morning. The kitchen elves owe me one anyway."

He didn't move. You turned around and saw him contemplating.

"Y/N." Remus tilted his head to one side. I think I like you. Can I take you on a date? Can I be your boyfriend? "You look pretty."

You grinned. "Say it again when you're sober."

Remus hung his head to other side. "You'll be pretty then too."

Cheesy. But you liked it. The blush on your face had made that clear. You decided right then that if he didn't remember any of this tomorrow, you'd make him remember.

He'd probably deny all of it, but you were going to kiss the hell out of him either way.

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THE END

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commissions | kofi

#remus lupin x reader #remus x reader #lupin x reader #remus lupin x you #moony x reader #marauders #imagines #fanfiction #reader insert #astoria writes #fluff #friends to lovers

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pretty-little-mind33 · 1 year ago

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James Potter x fem!girlfriend!reader

Summary: When your long-term boyfriend is slipped a love potion—he loses his memory of you.

Genre: Angsty Fluff (happy ending)

Warnings: intense swearing, violence, being drugged/spiking someone's drink, mentions of blood, vomiting, crying, a suggestive joke, James kinda has light trauma

~ again—to the kind anon that had this idea—thank you! ~

JAMES POTTER MASTERLIST

Everyone knew it was you and James. It has always been you and James. Ever since the third term of your second year when he'd stolen you an absurd amount of chocolates and candies from Honeydukes because you had failed an exam and were sobbing in your dorm, you knew he had you hooked around his pinky. Luckily, you had him wrapped around yours just as well.

He was yours as you were his.

It didn't worry you that you hadn't seen your boyfriend all day because N.E.W.T's were coming up and as much as he pretends not to study or care, you've never met someone more desperate for success.

James had even left you a little note signed "only yours" telling you he'd be in the library today, so you used this time to spent the day with the girls instead.

However, you didn't expect to see what you did when you walked into the Great Hall that evening.

Remus, Sirius, and Peter look just as dumbfounded as you when James stands from his usual seat, his arms outstretching towards another girl.

Your smile falters and you freeze up, your stomach sinking as his hands find the girl's waist and he spins her around.

"What the fuck?" Marlene mutters from next to you, her arms crossed.

"Who is that?" Mary asks, unhooking her arm from Lily's as she sympathetically touches your shoulder. You blink, unable to look away from whatever nightmare is happening.

James would never cheat on you—especially in public like this.

Never.

"Amerie something, she's in my Potions class," Marlene whispers but her gaze is hard.

James's grin is wide and the girl—Amerie apparently—holds him closer. She's beaming as her manicured hands finds his cheeks and your entire world shatters when she presses her lips to his. James leans into her kiss, one hand at her waist while the other runs in her dark curls.

Marlene breaks at the same time as Sirius does and they march up to the couple. You're stunned, your eyes watering as you replay how your beloved boyfriend kissed another girl in front of everyone. Including you.

James would never cheat on you—right?

Lily takes your hand and guides you towards where everyone had gathered. Marlene is being held back by Mary, but she's furious as she screams at James and Amerie. Sirius stands next to James, his arms crossed as he stares at his best friend.

When his gaze flickers to you all calm crumbles. "James," Sirius says, interrupting Marlene's shrieks, as he sounds unusually serious, "This is wrong. What the bloody hell is wrong with you?"

James has never looked this confused in his life. "What are you talking about, Pads?" he asks innocently, his eyes scanning all his friends and their upset expressions.

They skim over you as if you were nothing to him— as if he hadn't held you close to his heart just yesterday and whispered how much he loved you into your hair.

Amerie leans into James, her hand on his chest, and even Remus scoffs.

"You can't be serious, James?" Remus says. He stands and puts his hand on your other shoulder as Lily holds your other arm. He stands tall and looks stern, clearly unamused by whatever sick joke he thinks his best friend is playing.

James's eyes widen but even Peter squeaks, "You have a girlfriend," as if to remind James.

"I know!!" James exclaims and turns to Amerie as he smiles like a love-sick fool. You feel like you're going to vomit all over your uniform. "Aren't I allowed to kiss my lovely girlfriend?"

Chaos ensues as Amerie holds James closer, her icy-blue eyes staring into yours with venom and malice as Marlene lunges for the two of them.

Marlene is pulled away by Mary and Lily and Sirius and Remus speak up with confusion as they jumble out accusations and disbelief.

You stand there, frozen, as your boyfriend looks right through you.

"She is your girlfriend, you dimwit!" Lily shouts and points to you. "Not this minger," Marlene adds with a hiss at Amerie, eyes dark.

James finally looks at you and your breath hitches when you see the look in his eyes. There is no remorse or shame, just a blank expression as he looks you over.

"Who?" he asks as he turns to his friends with a genuine look of confusion on his face. His question brings silence to the group and you feel warm tears brim in your eyes.

Some part of you screams at you that the confusion is real. You know James and you know how he lies. But his voice rings in your ears as pain caves in your chest and you turn, breaking into an embarrassing jog as you run away.

James would never cheat on you—right?

Lies.

* * *

A few hours later, when Lily comes into the dorm with news that James is in the Hospital Wing, you don't want to care but you do. Just the mention of James in pain hurts you and Lily doesn't even have to convince you to come see him.

You walk into the room and your eyes instantly widen. Dumbledore and Amerie stand in one corner. Amerie's eyes are bloodshot and she's pleading with Dumbledore—who looks absolutely furious.

Lily pulls you to the main dilemma and you see James sitting up in a bed, a bowl in his lap as he's encouraged to vomit. He's surrounded by Sirius, Remus, Peter, and Madame Pomfrey.

Remus sees you and Lily and he walks up to you.

"Is he okay?" you ask, your voice small and hoarse from your crying.

"Love potion," Remus doesn't waste time as he glances at Amerie in the corner, his jaw clenched, "she slipped it in his drink when we went to lunch. I lost him this afternoon after that but I thought he'd gone to find you. It's strong, well made, but Madame Pomfrey is convinced she can reverse the spell it has on him."

You let out a shaky breath, shoulders relaxing as you take in his words. A love potion? It had all been fake.

You turn to look at Amerie and anger swims through you. She'd drugged your boyfriend and taken him from you. You clench your fist.

If she wasn't with Dumbledore, you'd punch her.

"But Y/n," Remus interrupts your violent fantasies and Lily takes your hand. Lily clearly knows the news Remus is about to break and it doesn't sound good. "The reason he didn't remember you is that the potions—well he was already in love with you so the potion messed up that chemistry and it was so strong it reversed all those emotions to Amerie. Erased any memory of you completely."

You feel like you can't breathe.

"Madame Pomfrey doesn't think she can fully reverse his memory loss," Lily whispers and tightens her grip on your hand, "Obviously, he won't be in love with Amerie anymore but—we don't think he'll remember you either."

You can barely hear her. Your eyes water as your eyes glaze over and you look behind Remus at James. Your James, who is puking his guts out and who doesn't have a clue who you are. He has no more memories of you. No more midnight secrets or scandalous touches. No more sweet confessions or fleeting arguments. Nothing.

And it's all her fault.

You storm up to Amerie, ignoring the Headmaster's presence, as you see red. You grab her by the shoulder and punch her in the nose.

The sound resounds around the room as she falls back, a broken cry leaving her mouth as she holds her nose. Blood runs down her mouth and chin, her tears mixing with the crimson liquid as nurses rush to her.

Your voice is unemotional when you snarl, "Stay away from him, you psycho cunt."

* * *

You sit in the common room, bandaging your bruised knuckles, as you let your tears fall freely. Your heart feels broken and crushed into absolutely nothing.

You don't even care about the detention Dumbledore was basically forced to assign you. "Violence, no matter how deserved, is never the answer," he had said and perhaps he had a point because breaking Amerie's nose didn't really make you feel any better.

She'd still taken your heart away from you.

All you want is to reverse time and prevent James from leaving so early in the morning and slipping through your fingers. You hate yourself for not finding him in the library that afternoon. You should have studied with him—maybe then you could have prevented this.

You unclench your fist and stare at James's crumbled note from a few hours earlier.

Early morning for Quidditch then I'll be in the library studying. You can always join me, lovie, or go to Hogsmeade with the girls, I know they miss you. I can't always be selfish and have you all to myself, can I?

I love you, my darling.

Only yours,

You choke on another sob and you resist the need to scream.

"Hi," a familiar voice suddenly whispers from above you and you look up. Color has returned to James's cheeks and he's standing in front of you. He's so familiar and so different.

He doesn't look at you the same and you want to cry harder. He looks down at the note in your hand and holds out his hand when he sees a glimpse of his own chicken scratch.

You hand it to him without a word, leaning back on the couch as you wipe your tears with your palms. You shut your eyes, feeling the cushions dip as James sits next to you and you can feel the tension in the air. You peek at him as he shakes the note and says, "So, this is real, hm? It's not some messed up nightmare? I- I don't even remember writing this. I remember this morning but—you aren't in the memory," his voice sounds shaky.

"It's okay," you whisper, unable to say much more or you'll cry.

James turns to you and shakes his head. "No. It isn't okay. I want to remember you," he whispers and takes your hand.

Your head snaps up, eyes widening at the sudden warmth of his touch. James puts the paper in your palm and closes it, squeezing your hand, "I obviously loved you a lot, and I think you loved me too—"

"Love," you whisper, looking him in the eyes, "I haven't stopped."

James makes a pained grimace and his hand loosens around yours. "I'm so sorry. I wish I could remember. I wish this never happened. I know I don't know you anymore or well, my brain doesn't know you but I still can't stand you being hurt because of this," he sighs, "Sirius told me everything. I have so many pictures of us in my room—my sheets smell like your perfume—I– I wish I could remember," he sounds so lost and your heart breaks.

You can't help yourself. You cup his cheek and lean your forehead onto his like you'd done a thousand times over the last years. James doesn't pull away. Instead he leans into you, as if your touch sparked a distant muscle memory.

"It's okay. It's not your fault. I-" you pause and then say, "I can help you remember, if you want?"

James doesn't hesitate and he nods, his breath unsteady, "I do. I don't understand why but my heart, well it misses you. I want to understand why."

Your heart flutters at his words and you smile. You pull away and smile at him. His smile is weak and you know him all too well to let that slide. "What's wrong, James?" you ask and when his eyes shift, you can tell he's feeling guilty.

"I'm sorry you lost your boyfriend. You didn't deserve that."

You sigh, "It's not your fault, okay?" you look him in the eyes and wait until he nods solemnly. "If we're meant to be, we'll figure this out, yeah?"

"Yeah," James whispers in agreement.

* * * Six Months Later * * *

The snow falls around you as you and your friend return from The Three Broomsticks one Sunday evening. Sirius and Remus walk much faster than you and James as Sirius rambles wildly about this new muggle band Remus helped him discover, and Peter loiters behind you all as he hurries to finish reading his Transfiguration book due Monday morning—he seems quite discouraged considering the snow keeps ruining his pages.

You are snuggled up against James, his arm wrapped around your shoulder as he adjusts your scarf and presses a kiss to your head. You sigh, continuing your conversation about how very clearly chocolate is the superior ice cream flavor, and James just listens even though he has no clue why you're talking about ice cream in the dead of winter.

Suddenly, your voice dies down and you tense when you see who's walking towards you. She's with three of her best friends—snotty Ravenclaws with egos larger than their brains—and you feel sick as all those horrible feelings come bubbling up again.

Amerie had been suspended for six months after what she had done to James and while you and your friends insisted she be expelled, your outburst of violence had inevitably lightened her sentence.

Dumbledore didn't want a scandal on his hands and Amerie's parents were well off—surprisingly more so than the Potters.

James senses your tension and he looks up too, his stomach sinking. Amerie is staring at you both and her friends are whispering. You look between her and James, sensing how uncomfortable he is with her presence and anger boils inside you.

Six months. Six months of peace and time you had to rebuild your relationship with him. Six months you spent taking him to all your favorite places, reminding him of all those secrets he had already earned, and telling him stories he should remember.

Six months to catch up on six years, all because of her.

You feel James's gloved hand find yours and he squeezes it, pressing his lips into your hair near your ear and he murmurs, "Ignore her, my love." His voice sounds a little strained and you look at him, the warmth of his hazel eyes calming you.

You nod and press a kiss to his lips. You can feel Amerie's eyes on you as you pass but you just walk faster. Once she and her friends are behind you, you squeeze James's hand too. "Are you okay?" you whisper.

James had been very open with you about how much what had happened scared him and still does. There were times he remembered snippets of you from before, but mostly nothing, and that scares him. I never want to lose you again, he had said three months into the six and you knew he meant it.

When James Potter loved, he loved hard, and it became very obvious his feelings for you had returned even stronger than they had been.

"Yeah," he whispers, his voice small.

You pause, turning around and taking his cheeks in your hands, encouraging him to look at you. "Baby, it's okay if it made you feel uncomfortable to see her. It's normal," you say, kissing his forehead and leaning against it.

James holds you close and kisses the crook of your neck, which causes you to giggle.

"I love you," he mumbles and you grin.

"I love you," you say and kiss his lips again.

James runs a hand in your hair and sighs, lifting his head and watching Amerie and her friends disappear down the road. "As much as I hate her for what she did, I am sort of grateful," he whispers.

"Oh?" I ask, caressing his cheek lovingly.

"Mmhm—it was an absolute pleasure falling in love with you all over again," James says sincerely and your heart flutters at his words.

You laugh and ruffle his messy hair. "You're such a dork," you chuckle.

James laughs now too, "It's true!"

Suddenly, you shriek lightly when you feel cold snow glide down your neck from inside your scarf. You and James spin around at the same time, catching Sirius as he makes another snowball and barks out a laugh, "Ooops."

Sirius smirks and as if on cue, James bends over and pats down his own snowball to throw at Sirius in your defense.

"Keep your grubby snowballs away from my girl, Pads," James shouts in between his laughter as he runs after his best friend. You hear Sirius mumble something that sounds like, "Ooh, kinky," before James shoves snow into his mouth.

You just smile, your heart feeling completely full.

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buckysleftbicep · 1 month ago

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letters through time (2) 𐙚 b.b

pairing: 1940s!bucky barnes x modern!fem!reader

warnings: bucky being an absolute flirt, some angst

summary: you find a letter from 1944 hidden in the old brooklyn apartment you moved signed by one james buchanan barnes. you write back, he did too, and somehow, across decades, you both fall in love.

word count: 1.8k

author's note: chapter 2 is here!! i love this chapter so, so much and i hope you do too! thank you for stopping by my loves! i miss 40s!bucky so much.

series masterlist

It became a ritual.

Each morning, before brushing your teeth or even checking your phone, you opened the drawer.

Sometimes the letter was already waiting—tucked beneath the linen cloth like it had grown there overnight, the envelope still warm from some invisible warmth. Other times, you had to wait. Hours. A day. But it always came.

And with every letter, Bucky Barnes became less of a ghost and more of a person.

You learned the rhythm of his days. The sharp whistle that pulled him from his bunk before sunrise. The sound of boots slamming against pavement during drills. The warmth of the boys in his unit, the fear of the war hidden behind their jokes, the quiet way Steve carried the weight of the world on his shoulders without complaint.

You told him about your own days. The museum. The cataloging. How every box of artefacts made you feel like you were touching echoes of a time you now saw through his eyes.

You joked about your coffee addiction, the neighbour’s cat who acted like it owned the hallway, and the fact that you were talking to a man who was born before sliced bread became a thing.

He told you he found that hilarious.

March 19th, 1944 Sweetheart, You said people in the future are obsessed with their coffee, right? I’m starting to think I was born in the wrong era. But you wanna know the real reason I wake up smiling lately? It’s you. Your words. Your voice in my head when I read your letters. I never thought paper and ink could feel like a heartbeat. I asked Steve what he thinks about writing letters to a girl from the future. He laughed and told me if anyone could charm a girl, it’d be me. So. Here I am. Trying. Yours, Bucky

Somewhere between shared stories and inside jokes, your letters turned soft.

You told him about your favourite books. The first time you got your heart broken. That sometimes you felt a little lost, like you were floating through life without knowing where to land. You asked if he ever felt the same.

He did.

You asked what scared him most.

Not coming home. Forgetting who I am, maybe. Being forgotten. Losing people I love. Losing myself. Does that count?

You wrote back that of course it counts. That he wouldn’t be forgotten. Not by history. Not by you.

He sent a dried daisy once. Pressed between the pages of his letter. He picked it, he said, from a patch behind his barracks, just for you. It arrived crisp and pale, as if time hadn’t dared touch it.

You said you like soft things, doll. Thought you deserved something pretty. Hope the flower’s not too crushed, I’m better at shooting targets than pressing petals. I like thinking of you with something I held in my hands. Makes this whole crazy thing feel real. You feel real to me, (Y/N).

You read that line more times than you meant to.

And then one night, after a long shift at the museum and the kind of quiet that makes you feel a little too alone, you sat down at your desk with a pen in your hand and a question you weren’t sure you should ask.

You asked him for a photo.

It felt like you were crossing some invisible line. But the way your chest fluttered when you read his letters, the way your cheeks warmed at his teasing, it made you want to see him. Not the black-and-white image in a museum. Not the name in a textbook.

Him.

You folded the letter before you could change your mind and tucked in a polaroid, nothing dramatic. Just you in the corner of your room, soft light spilling across your face, your favourite sweater slipping off one shoulder as you smiled, small and uncertain, into the lens.

You slid it into the drawer and closed it gently. You didn’t expect anything to happen.

But the next morning, when you opened it again and there it was.

March 24th, 1944 Hey there, gorgeous. Is it allowed for a guy to be knocked breathless by a picture? ‘Cause I think I forgot how to breathe the second I saw you. You're beautiful, (Y/N). There’s this look in your eyes, like you already know me. Like you’ve been waiting for me. You asked for a photo, so I’m sending one. Just me, back behind base, jacket half-off because Steve said I look less like a “buttoned-up cadet” that way. Punk said I should look like the guy writing love letters to a girl in the future. He’s not wrong. Thought you should see the face that’s been stealing your time, sweetheart. Do I get another photo in return? Maybe one where you’re smiling that secret little smile you keep mentioning in your letters? Always yours, Bucky

You pressed the photo to your chest the moment you saw it.

He was handsome, of course, broad shoulders, a strong jaw, that soft curve of a smile. But it was his eyes that got you. Cerulean-blue and impossibly warm. Kind in a way photographs rarely captured. Like they weren’t just looking out, but looking at you. Through paper. Through time. Through everything.

You wrote back with shaking fingers and told him he wasn’t playing fair.

I don’t think you know what you’re doing to me, Bucky Barnes. Your letters make my heart race. And yes, I’ll send another picture. But only if you promise not to fall in love with me too fast. Kidding. (Sort of.) Yours always, (Y/N)

After that, the letters got flirtier.

You called him trouble. He called you trouble he’d gladly ruin himself for.

You teased him about the way he laced his boots after he sent a picture of himself leaning against a wall behind base, jacket slung over one shoulder, boots perfectly tied like he’d stepped out of a training manual.

You really lace them like that every day? you wrote back. No wonder Steve calls you a tightass. You joked after he had complained in the last letter about how Steve comments about his boots and how he laced them.

He replied that a man needed to be ready for anything. Especially if he was trying to impress a girl from the future.

He teased you in return about your obsession with peanut butter and how it came up in almost every letter, how he still couldn’t wrap his head around it being spread on toast.

Can’t wait to try it, he wrote, especially if you’re the one handing me the spoon.

You asked about his childhood.

He told you about Coney Island. Stealing candy from the corner store. Watching fireworks with Steve every Fourth of July. His first kiss at sixteen that made him laugh afterward because he sneezed mid-way through.

You told him about your favourite street vendor, how you always bought two hotdogs and left one for the homeless man at the subway entrance. You said it reminded you that kindness still existed in the world, even when everything felt overwhelming.

Bucky’s reply came back with a line that made your breath catch.

You're the kind of person I fought this war for. You make me believe there’s still good waiting for us on the other side.

You didn’t sleep that night. Not really.

Just reread the letters under your covers like a lovesick teenager. Smiling into your pillow. Laughing softly at his dumb jokes. Heart aching at his soft words. And slowly, slowly, something bloomed.

You were falling for Bucky.

A man eighty years out of reach. A soldier caught in the pages of history. And yet, the way he wrote to you… the way his words wrapped around your heart like warmth in the cold.

It felt real.

And terrifying.

But you didn’t stop writing.

One night, you asked him a dangerous question.

If we could meet one day, if somehow the world let us, what would you want to do first?

His answer came in the next letter, scribbled quickly, like he couldn’t get the words down fast enough.

I’d want to touch your face. Just to make sure you're real. Then I’d probably kiss you. Slow. Like I’ve been waiting lifetimes. We could walk through Brooklyn, hand in hand. You could show me the future, and I’d show you the places where I left pieces of myself. I don’t know how this happened, doll. But I think I’m falling for you. Hell. I know I am.

You pressed your fingers to your lips as you read, like it might soften the ache building in your chest.

He was falling for you.

And god help you because you were falling too.

March 28th, 2020 Dear Bucky, I find myself thinking about you all the time. When I pass old brick buildings. When jazz plays from passing bars. You’ve become a part of my days without me even realising it. I fall asleep thinking about your words. I wake up hoping for another letter from you. And when everything around me feels too loud, it’s your voice in my head that quiets it. There’s something about the way you write, the way you talk to me like I matter, that stays with me through my day. It lingers and it reminds me of the warmth left behind after a fire. I keep your daisy tucked in my favourite book, it's delicate and a little crushed, but I love it because it came from you, because you thought of me. Maybe this is fragile and maybe it’s impossible too. But it feels real. And I don’t want to let it go. I don’t know what this is, not exactly. But I know how I feel when I read your letters. And Bucky… I think I’m falling for you too. Yours, (Y/N)

The reply didn’t come the next morning.

Nor the day after that.

Your heart twisted with worry. Every moment without a letter felt like a thread unraveling from your chest. But then—on the third day, you opened the drawer and found an envelope.

Thicker than usual.

And when you unfolded the pages, your heart nearly burst.

March 31st, 1944 Sweetheart, I’m being deployed. Steve and I are heading to Austria. Orders just came in. We leave in a week. I didn’t want to tell you at first. Didn’t want to break what we’ve built. But I can’t lie to you, I don't want to. You asked what I’d do if I could meet you? Well, I’ve started asking around, talking to Howard. He’s the smartest guy I know. He thinks that maybe there’s a way. A way for me to get to you. He said he’d help me, when we make it back. So, I’m writing this with hope, (Y/N). Hope that when this war ends, when I’ve done what I have to do, I’ll find you. Please wait for me. Yours, always, James

James.

You clutched the letter to your chest, tears stinging your eyes.

You whispered his name like a prayer.

And wrote back with your heart in your throat.

taglist: @ndanddnd @darling-eos @alikkatz @creepybake

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nobitchs-world · 11 months ago

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If I was y/n a nigga could never do me wrong without me doing them worse

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cherrys-muses · 5 months ago

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𓍯 ִֶָ FEBRUARY FOURTH; side b — once more to see you - mitski | j. patrick march x r

w; well … if he needs one — james patrick march, mentions of death, this is actually probably really short an; guys </3333 this sucks and i’m so so sorry :((( i tried my best, truly.

mixtape here!

The lights from the chandelier sparkle almost like glitter, the soft glow of lights that would, more than likely, not be enjoyed — but you found the warm dim hue of the lights beautiful.

James had the ground from underneath the pretty object polished so well, you could see your reflection if need be. Your lips pull into a tired smile, eyes glancing over at the man whose eyes had yet to stray far from your face.

“It’s beautiful, James,” Your hand reaches up, your knuckles brushing against his cheek. “Thank you.”

“I would do anything for you, darling,” His hand grabs yours, pressing his lips against your knuckles, allowing his lips to linger against your skin. You smile as your eyes linger on him, slipping your hand from his lips to cup his cheek softly.

“I know, March. That’s why I married you, of course — I have yet to ever question your love and loyalty.”

“And you’ll never have to. As long as we both are alive.”

The smile that remains on your lips suddenly wavers into something sad, your eyes beginning to water from his words as you nod quickly. You glance away and take a deep breath as best as you could, brows pinching together slightly.

He stares at you with worry evident in his voice, yet allows you to remain silent.

“I am…I’m sorry I am not dressed properly.” You breathe out. He smiles softly, shaking his head as his eyes take in the silk nightgown and robe. Your hair had been curled a day ago, yet, he believes he prefers the loose waves that they had flattened too.

“You look beautiful. It’s as if it is the first time I have laid my eyes on you,” His hand cups your cheek softly, his thumb brushing a tear that had rolled down your cheek. Your eyes close, head tilting closer to his palm. “I would never change a thing.”

Your lips press into his gentle palm before pulling away and looking at him. “Could we dance together?”

Without speaking, he leads you towards the floor underneath the glittering lights as he playfully bows. Laughing softly, you curtsy before grabbing the hand he has outstretched.

He didn’t mind the quietness, you didn’t either. It was just the two of you, in your small world.

Yet, it would soon shatter for James.

He stops when he feels the pressure from your nails against the back of his neck and how your feet suddenly stumble over themselves.

Pulling his head away to study you, he finds your eyes fluttering slightly as your brows pinch together. In a panic, he says your name loudly, hearing his voice echoing off the walls. His hand grips your side while the other remains on the back of your head, lowering you towards the ground.

You're still holding onto him, yet your grip isn’t as tight as it was a moment ago and your head is slightly dropping towards the side. He lifts his hand and pushes the hair from your face that covers it, before cradling your jaw.

“James?” It’s weak. James feels the tears burn at his eyes when he notices how you’re seemingly struggling for breath. He calls out for help, not knowing if anyone is close enough to hear him scream out. “No…No, shhh,” You shake your head.

“I-I need to get you some help.”

“It’s okay,” You smile up at him weakly. Your eyes are barely open and he hates feeling as if he’s already forgetting the color of your eyes. “It’s okay. Just…you can just hold me.”

James looks fearful. Yet he’s never been a fearful man until now.

“Please.”

James lets out a choked sob, nodding as he pulls you closer to his chest. His fingers wrap around your wrist and gently pull your arm around his shoulder before wrapping his own arm around your side once again.

He rocks with you from side to side, feeling the soft, small puffs of air against his cheek.

“I love you, James,” You whisper softly into his ear. “‘Til death.”

Squeezing his eyes tighter and gripping onto your body tighter, he’s hoping that will help teather you to him. To this earth and remain with him.

He doesn’t want to say it. He doesn’t want to accept it. Yet, you have to know he feels the same way about you — as if he had yet to make it clear.

“I love you. ‘Til death.”

Your lips pull into one final small smile, your arm slowly sliding away from his shoulder. Pulling away hesitantly, he stops rocking side to side slowly when he notices you’re finally gone.

His chin quivers as he drags the tip of his fingers along the contours of your face, engraving it in his mind as if he could ever forget. Face crumbling, his forehead slowly lowers and pressing into your chest as he tries to pull you closer.

‘Til death.

𓍯 ִֶָ tags; @ali-r3n — @marchsfreakshow — @bohnerrific69 — @sstar-ggirl

𓍯 ִֶָ thank you for reading! comments, reblogs, & feedback are welcome & greatly appreciated!

#evan peters x fem!reader #evan peters x reader #james patrick march x fem!reader #james patrick march x reader #james patrick march x you

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moonstruckme · 4 months ago

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Inspired by this adorable fic by @inkdrinkerworld <3

cw: hospital, mention of surgery, reader has a fear of anesthesia/being unconscious

emt!marauders x fem!reader ♡ 940 words

You wish that stupid heart monitor would stop exposing you to everyone in the hospital wing.

“You’re fine.” James rubs his palm over your heart consolingly. “Deep breaths.”

You inhale, and he does it with you, you feel his chest expand against your back. James got into bed with you soon after you got here, when you wouldn’t stop trying to get up and pace the room. After your IV was put in, Sirius threatened to sit on you if you tried to get out of bed again. James is a nicer compromise.

“This is so stupid.” Your exhale comes out in a disbelieving huff. “I don’t even have to do this.”

“Dove, you’re already here,” Remus reasons. “You’ve come this far, let’s just see it through. You’ll be alright.”

Truly, you’re not sure how you wound up here. When your doctor recommended you for surgery, you said you’d think about it, but you were lying. You knew it, your boyfriends knew it, your doctor probably knew it too. Going under was something you had no intention of ever, ever doing. You didn’t know if the problems you were having would persist without the recommended procedure. You almost didn’t care. The one thing you knew for absolutely sure was that you did not want it to happen.

And yet, it began to. All it took was one evening of lovingly made hot cocoa and sweet-talking from James to get you to set up the appointment. From there, the date marched continually closer, and all your boyfriends had to do was keep you from backing out. To their credit, they’ve had extraordinary follow through. Suddenly you find yourself in a hospital bed waiting for a surgery you could swear wasn’t going to happen.

“You don’t even have to stay the night,” Sirius says. He’s sitting cross-legged in one of the chairs against the wall, undeterred by the plastic arm digging into his thigh. “We’ll have you home by dinnertime. Focus on that, doll.”

“I want to be home now,” you mumble. You know you’re acting childish, but you’d rather gripe than cry, and the way you’re feeling those are your only two options. “Are we sure I can’t be awake?”

“You don’t want to be awake.” James kisses behind your ear. “It’s quite bloody. You’d think it was gross.”

“Don’t scare her,” Remus cautions quietly.

You talk over him. “I’d rather be grossed out and know what was happening.”

Sirius leans forward to grasp your hand, shushing you. “You already know what’s going to happen, baby. We’ve been over the whole thing. Do you want to hear it again?”

“No.” In truth, hearing about the procedure had grossed you out. But that’s not your main issue. Tears prick your eyes.

“Hey,” Sirius says softly. His thumb runs over your knuckles. “You’re okay. You’re going to be just fine. Home by dinner, remember?”

“I just… “ You pull in a wavering breath. “I really don’t like the idea of being unconscious while people poke and prod at me, and I can’t wake up. It freaks me out.”

“No one is going to poke or prod at you.” Remus is leaning his forearms on his knees, eyes honey soft. “It’s a routine procedure. They do it all the time, it’s their job.”

“I’d just feel better if I could be awake.”

“It’d be so much scarier if you were awake. This way, you only go to sleep, and the next thing you know it’s done.”

“That’s the worst part, though. It’s not like I can wake up even if I want to. I’ll be completely helpless.”

“Sweetheart, no one is going to hurt you.”

“I know that.”

“Are you sure?” he asks gently.

You shut your eyes, tipping your face down as tears start to drip from your nose.

“Baby,” Sirius coos. His fingers feel cool against your cheek, cupping so he can kiss between your brows. James hugs you tighter. “Oh, shh, shh. I’m sorry you’re so scared, sweet girl. It’s really not so bad as you’re thinking.”

“Can you come with me?” you whisper. It’s not the first time you’ve asked, but you’re hoping this display of obvious patheticness will sway things in your favor.

“You know we would if we could, doll. They’re really strict about who’s allowed in the room.”

You nod, taking in a ragged breath.

“We’ll be with you until you go in,” James offers, “and as soon as you wake up. You’ll get to meet your anesthesiologist before, too. Her name’s Kara, she’s a sweetheart.”

That James knows the person trusted with putting you out does comfort you some. He pats your chest with his hand over your heart, gentle and rhythmic. Slowly, it lulls yours into complaisance. Your heart monitor stops its ratcheting.

“Breathe.” James exhales slowly. “We won’t let anything happen to you. You’re in good hands, angel, I promise.”

“I’m sorry,” you say, opening your sore eyes. “I know I’m being crazy.”

Sirius is squatting by your bed now. He tuts, quick to right you. “You don’t have to be sorry. You’re scared, it’s fine. I wish you weren’t because it’d be easier for you, but it’s not your fault.”

“You’ll feel better once you’re in there,” Remus promises. “Really, lovely, it’s so much less daunting than you’re imagining it to be. It’s going to go by so easily. And then we’ll be with you, yeah?”

“Yeah,” you sniffle.

“What do you think?” James presses his cheek to your ear, pleasantly warm. “You think you can go an hour without us? You’ll be okay?”

You make a low, reluctant sound. “Maybe.”

“There’s our girl.”

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imtryingbuck · 1 year ago

Text

His Flower.

~ gif not mine credit to owner ~

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem!Reader

Summary: Bucky and Y/n have known each other since they were babies, they love each other but don’t say anything until Bucky goes to war.

Word count: 11,963

Warnings: angst. fluff. mentions of cheating (not Bucky) mentions of domestic abuse. Swearing. Steve never visits Peggy when she’s old. Bucky knew about Steve getting the serum. Pregnancy. Sad Bucky (that’s a warning in itself) Bucky was accused of the bombing in Vienna in 2015 in this. Blip happens but none of the avengers get blipped nor do any of them die. There’s a lot…so if I’ve missed anything please let me know

Masterlist

May 21st 1922

“Y/n stop running!”

“No”

“Why?”

“You have the lurgy”

Winnie and Y/m/n was standing in the shared courtyard laughing at the two five year olds as James ran after Y/n, the latter running as fast as her little legs could move.

The two women became friends rather quickly after Y/n, her mom and dad moved in next door just when Y/n was a year old. Baby James and Y/n spent everyday since they were introduced to each other, together.

“Those two…” Winnie laughed with a shake of her head as James finally grabs ahold of Y/n, her screams of laughter makes both mothers laugh along.

That was until the screams of laughter turns in to screams of pain.

James tripped over a loose concrete slab, in turn knocking into Y/n causing her to fall face first on the ground. Smacking her face and cracking her tooth.

“I-I-I’m sor-sorry Y/n I’m sorry” James cried backing up as their mothers came rushing over. His tiny hands shook as tears streamed down his puffy cheeks, he could see the blood flowing from her lips when her mom picked her up.

“Mo-momma it wa-was acciden-t I promise”

“I know sweetie, it’s okay” Winnie said after she helped her friend. Seeing her son shaking and crying as he backs up to the wall furthest away from them broke her heart, she and Y/m/n knew it was an accident and they both knew that James would never hurt his friend.

“I-it was accident” he hiccuped.

“Wan’ Jamie, mama wan’ Jamie”

Hearing her teary voice he pushed himself off the wall and ran around his ma going straight to Y/n. “I got you” whispering in to her hair as he wraps his arms around her.

December 24th 1922

As the fire crackled next to James and Y/n as they played with his toy trains and cars Y/n’s parents argued in the kitchen, from what Y/n could tell from this latest argument was that her dad had been fucking another woman. Again.

“Jamie what fucking mean?”

“I don’t know. I think it makes you cry”

“Mama always cries when dada fucking other women”

James shrugs, honestly feeling a little bit scared because of the raised voices and things being slammed down on the counters though he was just five years old he was trying to be brave in front of his friend.

The voices got louder as Y/n’s mom was pushing her dad into the hallway, screaming at him that this was the last time and for him to never come back. A photo frame that hung up on the wall falls and smashes loudly on the floor causing James to flinch, Y/n notices and takes his hand in hers smiling - she’s grown accustomed to the bangs, screaming matches and things being broken that it doesn’t bother her anymore.

James flinched once again when the front door opens and slams shut with a deafening bang. His scared wide eyes looked at Y/n’s, she gets up and moves to sit next to him as her mom screams once more and stomps up the stairs no doubt to chuck all of her fathers clothes out of the window.

“I got you”

She promised as she wraps her small arms around his body.

March 10th 1923

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY JAMIE”

Y/n screamed as she ran over to him, she was so excited for his birthday she had made him a card and got him a new wooden train.

“Ahhh who are you little monster?” He screamed when she jumped on his back.

“‘M not a monster”

“You are”

“Not”

“Are”

“Kids stop arguing, you’re both monsters” Winnie laughed hugging Y/m/n.

“It’s my birthday Flower”

“No it’s my birthday”

“No it isn’t”

Both moms roll their eyes as the kids continue to argue, heading into the kitchen leaving both of them to stand in the hallway arguing.

Y/m/n was sipping the coffee that Winnie had made her, Winnie expressed how happy she was for her friend for not taking back her husband, though finding it sad that he hadn’t been around to see Y/n. Luckily George stepped up and had even brought the five year old a present for Christmas.

“Mama where is present?” Y/n asked running up to her mom.

“Here sweetie and here’s the card you made” handing over the present and card, Y/n smiled and thanked her.

“Here you go Jamie. I made the card all by myself!”

“Thank you Flower” opening the card he smiles at her messy handwriting and the drawing of him and her that she drew. James gave her a kiss on her cheek before handing the card over to Winnie, then he opened the brown paper wrapping. “Flower…”

“It’s a train Jamie”

“I-thank you so much!” James had his other one stolen from Jimmy who lived across the street, mean kid who loved to bully younger kids.

“It’s okay. Do you like it?”

“I love it Flower”

June 2nd 1930

James and Y/n were walking down the street talking about how school went when James grabbed her hand causing her to pull it away and blush, giggling when he tried to grab her again.

“Flower stop, listen do you hear that?”

“No-wait now I do, what is it? Do you think it’s an animal? Can we keep it?”

“Yeah because animals can speak” he rolls his eyes, moving towards the entrance of the alleyway where the noise was coming from he turned to Y/n “stay here-“

“No I’m coming with you!”

“No you’re not. Just stay here”

Nodding in defeat Y/n watched him walk down the alleyway, a few minutes later she sees Jimmy and his goons running out and down the street. Running in the direction that James went she came to a halt when she saw him picking up a guy who was a lot smaller than him.

“Jamie who’s that?”

“Flower I told you stay where I told you to”

“Who is that?”

“M-my names Steve” the blonde said fixing his shirt.

“Hello Steve my names Y/n and this is James” moving closer to them she held her hand out to the blonde, turning to James “can we keep him?”

“Y/n he’s not an animal”

“But can we? We can be best friends forever and ever and ever and-“

“I’m sorry about her, she gets a bit excited sometimes” James said to Steve both watching Y/n go bright red as she continued to say ‘and ever’. “Flower breath”

“And ever and ever, please Jamie can we keep him I’ll be good forever and ever and ever-“

“Do you want to be our friend? Please say yes just to shut this one up”

Steve looked at both of them debating whether or not this was a prank, he’d gotten so use to being alone that the prospect of having two new friends scared him. But he could see the hopeful look in Y/n’s and James’s eyes, maybe just maybe this wasn’t a prank and maybe they genuinely want to be his friend.

“So…” Y/n asked getting impatient.

“O-ok, yes I’ll be your friend”

“Amazing! Come on we’re going to Mollys to get a burger-“

“And a milkshake! Have you ever been to Mollys? They make the best milkshake ever don’t they Jamie, they do so Stevie I swear”

“I apologise for her” James started.

Steve just smiled and shook his head “it’s okay bu-but I don’t have any money so I can’t come with you”

“Don’t worry about it Stevie I’ll pay for you. My father’s dead so we got money” Steve’s eyes went wide at how nonchalantly Y/n said that her father was dead.

“I-I’m sorry-“

“Don’t be I didn’t like him, so what milkshake do you want? They have vanilla, chocolate and strawberry. My favourite is strawberry and chocolate and Jamies is chocolate”

“Oh I-I’ve never had-“

James rolled his eyes as he knew what was coming. Steve looked at him wondering what he had said wrong when Y/n loudly gasped and threw herself on the ground.

“Flower-“

“He. Has. Never. Had. Milkshake. Before. Jamie”

“I know-“

“I-how, how does this even happen?”

“You going to get off the floor?”

“I can’t”

James leans over to take her hand in his and helped her stand. “Next time don’t throw yourself on the ground, your ma will get mad at you for ruining your skirt again”

“Come on Steve I’m going to blow your mind with the best milkshake in the world” ignoring James’s words she grabbed Steve’s hand and started to drag him to Mollys.

“Flower stop dragging him and be careful!”

To be truthful Steve didn’t honestly mind that she was dragging him along the pavement, he was quite excited about trying something new.

“Sooo whatcha think?” Y/n asked as soon as the glass was put in front of him.

“Flower he hasn’t even tried it yet” James laughed though he did have to admit that he was also wondering what his new friend was going to think of the drink.

Taking the straw in his mouth he took slow sips, liking the way it tasted straight away. “It’s good, I like it”

“Yes!” Y/n screamed causing some of the customers to look at her, not like she cared.

Luanne came over to serve them, she was an older lady who had grown use to the antics that James and Y/n liked to cause. As soon as she saw the two coming down the street she always had their milkshakes at the ready, knowing that on Monday, Tuesday and Friday Y/n had strawberry and the other days chocolate.

“Your usual darlings?”

“Yes please, Stevie what do you want?”

“I-I don’t have mo-“

“It’s on me I told you. We get burger and fries and they are the best”

“I-are you sure?”

“The best ever I promise”

“N-no about buying me food…you’ve already brought me a drink”

“Don’t be silly, do you want the same at us?”

“Okay, thank you”

Luanne smiled and walked away back to behind the counter. Steve watched as James or Bucky as he told him to call him, put his arm around Y/n’s shoulder and point at someone walking down the street. He couldn’t help but smile when Y/n laughed at whatever Bucky had said.

The food had come and true to her word it was amazing, Luanne came back over to hand them new drinks winking at Y/n who winked back, he found out that the second milkshakes were free. For the first time in Steve’s life he laughed and smiled genuinely, he had no idea that being beat up in some dingy alleyway would lead him to be making two new friends who actually seemed like they cared about him already.

Steve knew he had made two friends for life.

14th February 1931

“Hey Stevie” Y/n sang as she skipped up to him.

“Hey Y/n/n you still doing that?” Referring to her skipping, it was a new phase she was going through. Every where she went she skipped.

“Of course” she giggled.

“Where’s Bucky?”

“With his girlfriend” she grumbled. Poor James thought his best friend liked his girlfriend but Steve observant as always knew that this was indeed not the case.

“Yo-you still don’t like her I guess?”

“No. Are you okay? Is your eczema play-“

“Asthma, Y/n I have asthma”

“Oh yeah ah, is it playing up today?” Receiving a nod she nods too. “How about we walk super slow so you can catch your breath”

“I-I need to g-get back to home, n-need to help ma cle-clean up”

“That’s okay I’ll help you and your mom I don’t mind”

“A-ar-are you sure?”

“Of course, plus I’ve missed your mom”

Arriving at the Rogers’s residence Sarah greeted Y/n with a tight hug and a kiss to her cheek happy to see the young girl again. Ten minutes into cleaning Y/n told Steve to sit down as his asthma was getting worse, Sarah tried to help out but Y/n just shook her head and told her that it was fine.

She truly didn’t mind helping in cleaning up, she had grown use to having to do it at home since her mom was always working and her step father was too lazy and drunk most of the time to do it.

A year after kicking her father out of the house for the last time her mom got divorced from him as he was wanting to marry the woman he had been cheating on her with. Unfortunately her mom married another lazy man who only thought of himself.

But her mom was happy so Y/n was happy for her.

When her father died for some reason her mom received all his money. Which it had annoyed his new wife tremendously.

“It’s getting late darling, you should head home-oh just before you go here’s some mon-“

“No need to Mrs Sarah, I’ll see you tomorrow Stevie”

Waving goodbye and leaving the house before Sarah could argue about giving her money, skipping down the street she didn’t realise how dark it was when she was in the warm home that belonged to the Rogers.

As she got closer to home she came to a stop when she heard strange noises come from an alleyway, choosing to inspect the sounds she crept down the dark path, furrowing her eyebrows at hearing two different voices she was about to pop her head around before freezing.

“Oh Bucky” a girl moaned.

Slapping her hand across her mouth she started to stumble back. Of course she knew that James was going to be having sex, he was handsome and every girl wanted him, and of course she knew what they was doing she wasn’t stupid but hearing what followed after the girl moaned broke her heart.

He called his girlfriend Flower.

The name that he had always called her he was now calling someone else it. It was her nickname that he gave her since they was four and now he was calling some girl he had been dating for two months her name.

It broke her heart.

For three weeks she had managed to successfully avoid James she knew it was silly for not talking to her best friend over a nickname that he had every right to call someone else but she just couldn’t help but feel down knowing that she wasn’t his flower anymore.

“Y/n, Bucky and Steve’s here for you” her mom shouted from the door, she could hear her talking to them from where she was stood at from the top of the stairs.

Her heart dropped when her mom told both boys just to head up to her room. Scrambling and knocking over her little brother she ran into her room, shutting the door quietly before jumping on the springy mattress causing the metal bed frame to squeak loudly.

“Knock knock little monster” she could hear the smile in his voice.

“Come in” and she also knew that he would be frowning at her response, it wasn’t the usual one she gave him.

“Hi Flower” if he noticed her tensing he didn’t say anything about it.

“Hi Y/n/n”

“Hi boys. What are you doing here?”

“Missed you, you haven’t been around much” James said watching her reaction.

“I’ve been busy” she shrugged. It wasn’t a total lie but wasn’t the whole truth either.

“Doing?” James knew that she was lying, whenever she did she could never look him in the eyes.

“Things”

“What kind of things?”

“Things James! I do not understand why you are so nosey”

“Because I miss my Flower” stating it like it was the most obvious thing in the world. He frowned when she flinched at his nickname for her. “W-what was that for? Why did you flinch”

“I-I don’t know what your talking about”

“You flinched when I called you Flower”

“You did Y/n” Steve interrupted, he did hate having to come in between his best friends but he knew that if he didn’t it would probably go on and on.

“I-“ sighing with a huff she shrugged her shoulders. She knew James better than anyone she knew he wasn’t going to give up any time soon. “I heard you”

“Heard me? What are you talking about?”

“Calling your girlfriend Flower”

“I-I’ve never-”

“In the alleyway when you were having sex”

Steve shifted awkwardly on his feet whilst James stood still like a statue. He couldn’t understand what the problem was, so what he was having sex at least it was with his girlfriend, why would his best friend be upset about that?

“You called her Flower James.”

Oh. Oh shit.

“I-you-it-“

“Whatever it’s just a nickname right? I’m sorry that I haven’t spoken to you in weeks but it hurt Jamie, but she’s your girlfriend-“

“I broke up with her”

“Right…so can we be friends again?”

“Aren’t you going to ask me why I broke up with her?”

“No. I just want to be your flower again”

“You’ve always have been Y/n, nobody will take that away from you”

Sliding off the bed she jumped on James, wrapping her arms and legs around him hugging him like she had never done before.

Yes it hurt because he had called someone else the name he had given her but she realised she was being silly for not talking to him over it, he was her best friend as well as Steve and that’s all that mattered.

December 10th 1941

The Second World War had been going on for three years and now America was getting involved after the attack on Pearl Harbour, it’s all everyone spoke about, before there was young men leaving their homes and families to go over to Britain to help fight, a fight they had no reason to be apart off other than to help beat the bad guys, now no one had a choice but to fight.

When James told Y/n that he too enlisted in the army it crushed her heart, she knew he was doing it to help defend his country but that didn’t stop her from being scared. Scared of losing him.

“I can do this all day” Steve panted as the guy tried to get closer to him and Y/n. Y/n couldn’t help but roll her eyes at Steve’s confidence, she knew that he could not in fact do this all day. His asthma was getting the better of him.

Just as Steve was about to leap forward to defend himself and Y/n the guy was pulled away by the scruff of his jacket.

“Pick on someone your own size” James kicked the guy away, watching as the bully scramble away.

Y/n and Steve stood there frozen on the spot at seeing James dressed in his uniform.

It was really happening. She was going to lose her best friend.

“Why are you wearing that?”

“Because I’m a pirate. I’ve been recruited Flower, I ship out tomorrow” though James had a smile on his face his stomach churned at reminding himself of when he was going to fight, churned at not knowing when he was going to see his Flower or Steve again or if he ever would.

“Tomorrow? T-that’s not enough time-no Jamie you can’t-“

“I have to Y/n-“

“Tell them no.”

“You want me to tell the US Army no?”

“Yes”

“Flower”

“Or I’ll do it if your to chicken”

“Chicken? Really?”

“Guys stop arguing.” Steve tried to intervene but it was too late. He watched as his two best friends argued back and forth, feeling annoyed at the fact that he had been rejected once again no matter what name he used or what area he said he was from. And yet his best friend had been accepted by the Army and was allowed to go and fight against the bad guys.

“Anyway come on, we’re going to the Stark Expo”

What James failed to mention to the pair that he had a date with Connie or was it Bonnie? He couldn’t actually remember but whoever he was going on a date with the other girl was for Steve, he felt slightly bad that Y/n would have to be fifth wheeling even if he knew that she would end up leaving under the arm of some guy.

“-so I told him that he had to look after his own children you know? And guess what he said to me-Stevie? Ste-not again” Y/n muttered when she realised that not only had she been talking to herself for god knows how long, but when she turned around she saw the small frame of her best friend going into a recruiting tent that was set up at the Expo.

Following after him she watched as he went into a small makeshift room, entering she laughed when Steve tried to cover his naked chest.

“Steve seriously? You can’t keep doing this-“

“Why not? I can fight, just because I’m smaller then everyone including you doesn’t mean that I can’t help“

“You’d be killed straight away Steven!”

“So what?”

“So what? Steve-“

“I’ve agreed to be part of a science project for a doctor-“

“A science project? Steve what the hell are you talking about?”

“I-it doesn’t matter what does matter is that I’ve been accepted and I’m going to war”

“No. I forbid you from going”

“Forbid me?” Steve scoffed finding her behaviour stupid. He wanted to do that right thing and she was forbidding it. Ridiculous. “You can’t stop me Y/n”

“I-I don’t want to lose you too”

“What are you talking about? Buck will be fine”

“He might not Steve you don’t know this. I can’t-don’t want to lose my best friends please just stay with me here an-and wait for Ja-“

“No Y/n I’m doing this! Stop being selfish”

Being called selfish had whatever response she was going to reply back with to die on her tongue. Y/n was called selfish time and time again by her step father when she wouldn’t look after her siblings, his children. She had grown to detest that word, hated to be called it which James and Steve knew.

Steve instantly knew that he had messed up but before he could apologise he watched his best friend nod, spin on her heels and walked out.

James looked around with a smile on his lips when the flying car got higher off the ground frowning when he didn’t see Flower or Steve, his eyes darted around to find them, his left eye twitched slightly when he saw Y/n coming out of the recruiting tent he knew she had probably tried to talk to Steve out of signing up.

Ever since the war was declared Steve had become slightly obsessed with going on the front lines along with the rest of the hero’s and fight. James and Y/n took it in turns to get Steve away from the recruiting centres, took it in turns comforting him when he got turned down because of his health problems.

Leaving the girls where they were he went to find Steve to see what had happened. “Steve seriously man just give up”

“Don’t start Buck I’ve had enough of Y/n trying to stop me.” Steve told Bucky how Dr Erskine had given him the opportunity of joining the war to the whole conversation between him and Y/n, he quietly told his best friend that he had called their friend selfish.

“You called her selfish? Steve!”

“I know okay I know I messed up but-“

“Did she say where she was going?”

“No, I thought she was going to find you”

Bucky goes to reply when he gets interrupted by the two girls that he and Steve were meant to be on a date with, asking if they were still going dancing, James sighed before telling them no he had other plans. The girls wasn’t happy but James didn’t care, he needed to find his Flower.

Saying his goodbyes to Steve he turned on his heels to go to Y/n’s house.

Knocking on the door he waited patiently for someone to open, Y/n’s little sister opened and smiled instantly showing Bucky her missing front teeth. “Y/ns in her room”

“Thanks little one”

“‘M not little anymore!” She pouted, the same pout that reminded him of Y/n’s when she was younger.

“No, no you’re not” ruffling her hair he laughed when she tried to hit him, he’s always had a habit of winding up their younger siblings.

Bounding up the stairs nearly tripping over the toy train that belonged to her younger brother he turned the corner and knocked on Y/n’s bedroom door.

“Go away”

“Wow that’s rude Flower”

“Jamie?”

“Who else is calling you flower?”

“No one”

“Are you going let me in or we going to keep talking with a door in between us?”

“You may enter”

Entering her bedroom his heart clenched in his chest at seeing her eyes and cheeks red, tear strained track marks on her puffy cheeks. Ever since they were young he’s always hated seeing her cry.

His stomach dropping when he sees the photograph in her hands, knowing exactly which one it was. James had dragged Y/n and Steve to Coney Island for the day, James made Steve go on the Cyclone which was absolutely terrifying yet amazing at the same time. Steve didn’t quite enjoy it like Bucky or Y/n as he vomited pretty much everywhere.

Winnie, had taken the photo that morning they were standing outside the home James grew up in, smiling at the camera. Y/n in the middle of the two guys, Bucky had his arm around her shoulder and she had hers around Steve.

It was the only photo she had of the three of them.

“Flower…”

“He’s leaving me too, a doctor-a scientist has told him that he can join if he takes part in an experiment James. I-I don’t want to lose you both Jamie”

“Hey-hey your not losing either one of us doll-“

“But I am. This war is dangerous and if I lose either one of you I-I-“

“I promise you that I’ll come back-“

“You can’t promise me that Buck”

“I’m with you ‘til the end of the line, you know this. And I’ll always come back to you Y/n, always. Especially if you let me make an honest woman out of you” his voice went quieter, serious, hopeful that she would hear the genuine words that he spoke.

“You…want to-after going on a date with someone else on your last night of freedom-want to make an honest woman out of me?”

“I, yes. Y/n flower it’s always been you”

“I should be the one making an honest woman out of you-wait-what?”

He couldn’t help but chuckle at her facial expression when she finally registers his words “I’ve been in love with you for so long Y/n”

“And you’re telling me this the night before you ship off to god knows where?”

“You know me Flower, I’ve always been good with timing”

“You really aren’t” she laughed.

“Am too. But what do you say? When I get back I’ll marry you, get us a nice house maybe on a farm? We can have all the animals you want-yes even a dinosaur even though they don’t exist-and we’ll have children, and we can be happy forever”

“Y-you really want that with me?”

“There’s no one else in this world that I want that life with Flower”

Instead of verbally answering she threw herself into him, wrapping her arms around his neck and nodding so fast Bucky thought her head might fall off. Bucky held her face in between his hands just staring at her, he knew that she would never see herself in the same way he has always seen her, he lent in pressing his lips to hers hopefully being able to show her how much he loved her without saying those words out loud.

That night they slept arm in arm with one another both equally dreading for the sun to come up.

When the sun finally made an appearance, he left with the promise that he would be back in an hour so that their families could walk him to the docks, and not without stealing another kiss from her.

Hand in hand an hour later with Winnie, Rebecca, Y/m/n, Y/n’s stepdad and siblings met up with Steve who was waiting outside Mollys with three milkshakes. Everyone walked ahead whilst the three best friends walked slowly behind them, wanting to try and delay the inevitable.

“My promise still stands Flower, I’ll come home and we’ll have the perfect life together. I promise”

“You best come home to me then Jamie or I’ll beat you up”

“Wouldn’t doubt that for a second” he chuckled, everyone else joins in. “I promise to be safe and come home to you Flower. And I’ll write to you when I can okay?”

“I’ll write back to you I promise.”

When the last signal called for all soldiers to get on the ship, Bucky swallowed the sob that tried to make its way out of his plumb lips. Hugging his ma and sister one last time, and his best friends mom and siblings before making his way to Steve, hugging Steve he asked the blonde to look after Y/n which Steve promised he would. Standing in front of Y/n he smiled sadly and wiped her tears away before kissing her one last time, he’d already grown addicted to the way she tasted and the way her lips fit perfectly against his.

He couldn’t wait until he got back so he could spend the rest of his life kissing her.

March 15th 1942

“Y/n there’s a letter here for you!” Her little sister shouted from the bottom of the stairs, there was only one person that would be writing to her, hearing her sister she fell out of the bed with how fast she was trying to get out of it, running down the stairs she grabbed the letter out of her sisters hand.

“Y/n slow down” her mom tried to warn her but it was no use she was already running back upstairs. The excitement getting the better of her. Ripping open the envelope she settled back on her bed.

***

Dear Flower,

It’s been three months since I last saw you and I’m missing you more and more everyday, how are you? Have you been missing me? How’s Steve been? I’ve wrote to him too but I know you’ll tell me the truth.

I’m still holding on to my promise I made so don’t be finding any other man, please.

I’m sorry it’s not the longest letter but I don’t have much time, I’m sorry.

I love you Flower, I should have told you that the last time I saw you but just know I do with all my heart, I’ll see you soon.

All my love

Your Jamie.

***

“So…what did he say?” Y/n was so engrossed in the letter she didn’t hear her bedroom door squeak open or see her mom and sister standing in the doorway.

“H-he said he loves me, momma he loves me”

“Have you only just noticed?”

“What?”

“That boy has been in love with you for as long as I can recall” her mom said as matter of factly.

“I-I need paper a-an-and a pen I need to tell him that I love him too”

Her mom smiled before handing her a piece of paper and a pen that she hid behind her back, she even gave her money so she could get a stamp to put on the letter.

***

Dear Jamie,

I love you.

I’ve been doing good, helping down at the factory with the rest of the women it’s good, I’ve made a friend her names Dot her husband is also fighting, she’s got two kids and Jamie they are the cutest little kids I’ve seen! Of course I have been missing you Jamie! Steve’s doing okay, he’s got a crush on a British woman names Peggy (but don’t tell him I told you that) she’s pretty, smart and really nice. I think she likes him too!

No other man will take me away from you Jamie I promise, I can’t wait to marry you and be able to wind you up for the rest of our lives together, I’m joking. Or am I?

Don’t apologise for your letter being short, anything is better than not having any from you, as long as you are okay and safe that’s all that matters to me.

I love you with all my heart to Jamie, honestly and truly.

Be safe and come home to me.

All my love

Your Flower.

***

Folding the letter and sliding it in an envelope her mom had given her when she was writing, she slipped her letter into the envelope sealing it off she ran downstairs slipping her shoes on she ran out of the house and down the street to the post office.

“A-a s-stamp pl-please” she panted at the worker.

The second the stamp was sealed securely on her envelope she posted it. Her heart raising rapidly, the temptation to just stand there and wait for the mailman to collect all the letters was there until someone cleared their throat from behind her.

“Sorry, I’m sorry” she muttered before leaving, now she just had to wait now until Bucky wrote her back. Shouldn’t be too long. Hopefully.

June 21st 1943

She last received a letter from James three months ago, he told her where he was and how he was doing, told her all about his comrades, told her that he’d come back to her. Ended that letter like the rest, with him telling her how much he loved her. Writing back as quickly as possible she told him how things were going, telling him about her news friends from the factory, and like all the others she ended it with telling him how much she loved him.

Everyday for three months she waited patiently for a letter to come, sighing deeply when she never received one. She was starting to get nervous at the prospect of something bad happening to him, but she kept pushing that thought away as she saw Rebecca everyday at the factory and she hadn’t said anything to her.

Six months after James left for war Y/n moved to a small apartment above the post office, it was small but enough for just her. One night after finishing her shift at the factory, Mary who worked at the post office came running out to her handing her a letter, Y/n ran up the stairs struggled to open her front door like always before she managed to get it to open, quickly closing and locking the door - keeping her promise to James who had made her promise to keep her front door locked at all times.

***

Dear Flower,

I’ve missed you terribly. How are you? I hope you’re okay and safe.

How’s Steve doing? He’s not been really responding to my letters. I’m a bit worried about him.

I’m sorry my letters are getting shorter, it’s just things have been hectic lately.

You’re in my thoughts and prayers every day and night, I’ll come home soon and I’m all yours forever I promise.

I love you more than anything Y/n.

All my love

Your Jamie.

***

Wiping her tears she moved to get her paper and pen, settling on her couch she started to write.

***

Dear Jamie,

I’m missing you more and more every day, I’m doing okay and I’m safe, you do not need to worry about me just as long as you are safe and sound that’s all that matters to me.

Steve will be getting the serum tomorrow (22nd June) I’m scared for him but Peggy has told me that everything will be okay. She’s even said I can come along too, Rebecca has said she will cover my shift because she’s an angel. Steve’s been busy but he’s okay I promise, oh…he jumped on a grenade BUT don’t worry it wasn’t a real one! I screamed and cried when Peggy told me, then I smacked Steve…he deserved it.

I’ve already told you not to worry about the shortness of your letters, I reread every single one of them over and over again.

You’re in my thoughts and prayers day in and day out.

I love you more and more than you’ll ever know.

All my love

Your Flower.

***

Sealing the letter in the envelope she unlocked the door and skipped downstairs where Mary unlocked the door and handed her a stamp, Mary knew the routine that Y/n had every time she got a letter that she waited long after closing so her new friend could post it that same day.

“Thanks Mary”

“Don’t need to thank me, how is he?”

“He didn’t say…but he said he misses me, it’s hectic over there so”

“It’s understandable, are you meeting Steve and that Brit tomorrow?”

“Peggy-“ Y/n laughed “-and yes, it’s a very big day tomorrow”

“What’s happened again?”

“H-he has a special operation and I’m just going for emotional support” she smiled, Peggy told her not to say anything to anyone but Mary had overheard Y/n talking to Steve about it. So she told her Mary that it was an operation he was having.

“Well I hope it goes well. I’ll see you tomorrow, goodnight darling”

The next morning Y/n waited outside for Steve and Peggy to show up, nearly ten minutes later a sleek black car pulled up and Peggy got out greeting her. Instantly regretting sitting in the middle of two people who were flirting, made worse by Steve as he didn’t realise that Peggy was in fact flirting.

Just like the car ride Y/n blanked out most of what Dr Erskine was waffling on about, her eyes kept going to the bed where Steve lay strapped in to Howard Stark, still slightly star struck.

Everything happened next was lost on her. Her heart raced when she heard Steve screaming in the chamber, a beast of a man was released from said chamber it looked like Steve, her best friend Stevie but this guy was huge. Strong. Muscly. Taller.

Before Steve had to look up to her and now it was the other way around. He said her name and smiled, he pulled her into his arms as she gaped at her best friend’s transformation. Steve released her to look at Peggy as she moved closer.

The unmistakable bang of a gun firing sounded in the room, Steve wasted no time in knocking Y/n on the ground covering her body with his. Dr Erskine had been shot, Steve took off barefoot after the gunman, Y/n’s hands were drenched in blood as she tried to put pressure on the wound, Howard Stark helping her by covering his hands over hers.

It all happened in a blur.

It all happened to fast.

She didn’t like it, she was scared.

She wanted Jamie.

She was always safe with her Jamie.

“Y/n? Y/n look at me love, it’s Peggy. I need you to concentrate”

But she couldn’t. There was too much blood. There was chaos in the background and the only thing she could focus on was the shaking of her hands covered in someone else’s blood.

“Y/n please darling snap out of it” that sounded a lot like Howard she thought to herself.

She could hear them talking then she saw Howard standing and moving away slowly. Then everything came into focus. The look of distress in Peggy’s eyes, the destruction of the room, the white sheet covering a body.

“S-Steve?”

“He’s, he’s okay. We need to go love”

“I-I-I want Jamie”

“I know but he isn’t here right now an-and he will be rather mad at me if I don’t get you out of here, so please follow me”

Despite the blood on Y/n’s hands Peggy still took them in hers and helped her stand, although Peggy didn’t really know Y/n all that well she knew that Steve cared deeply for her, making her care about the woman. Her main focus was getting Y/n to safety and then she could worry about everything else.

December 10th 1944

It’s been well over a year since Y/n watched Dr Erskine get shot and killed, in that year she went back to work in the factory. Nothing really changed for her in that year that had gone by, months would go by without a letter from Bucky she knew that he was still alive as his family wasn’t informed to state that he was dead.

It brought her some relief. But that didn’t stop the sadness from sinking in when she didn’t get a letter.

Steve had become a circus monkey for America, gaining himself the name Captain America. When she saw one of his shows for the very first time she couldn’t stop laughing. The outfit. The way he looked so unsure and uncomfortable. The music. The acting. It was laughable.

“Stop laughing Y/n” Steve said walking into the tent as she followed behind him.

“I-god you look ridiculous Stevie”

“Stop laughing!” He tried to act mad but her laugh had his lips turning upwards. For Steve it had been a long time since he heard her laugh like that. He missed it.

In October of 1943 Steve showed up at her apartment acting different, he was quieter, avoided talking about Bucky. Y/n had asked him if there was something wrong but all he did was give her a tight lipped smile and shook his head.

He wanted to tell her that he was told that Bucky and his unit had been captured as POWs, he wanted to reassure her that he was going to do everything in his power to get him back, to bring him home to her so they could get the life he’s knows they’ve always wanted with each other.

But he just couldn’t do it. He couldn’t bring himself to say them words and see her smile fade, tears gather in her eyes so he remained silent and listened to her rambling about something one of the girls said at work.

He couldn’t fail her, he was going to bring Bucky back no matter what it took.

Unbeknownst to Y/n not only was Bucky captured and then saved by their once scrawny little friend but that in ten minutes there was going to be a knock at the door and she’d be taken by two soldiers to go somewhere.

“It’s like I’m invisible” Bucky mutters when Peggy doesn’t even give him a second glance, he found it funny that Peggy had to practically spell it out for the blonde to understand what she was trying to hint. He knew that if Y/n was here and saw the exchange she would have been smiling so wide with her hands clasped together against her heart.

A small smile made its way to his lips as he thought about Y/n, his Flower. As soon as he got back to camp from being saved by Steve he went straight to his tent and wrote a letter to her, sealing it up in an envelope he got from one of the soldiers, giving it to the person he needed to for it to be sent off. Already excited for her letter. He missed her more than anything.

“You thinking about her Buck?” Steve’s voice pulled him out of his thoughts.

“Of course, she’s always on my mind-what?”

“Who’s always on your mind?”

“Ms Potts from down the street-“ he rolled his eyes “-Y/n, you’re an idiot sometimes Steve I swear”

“I’m always on your mind Jamie?”

Bucky’s eyes went wide looking Steve in the eyes, the blonde just smiled at him. Slowly turning around, his heart thumped loudly in his chest, blood rushing in his ears he turned to find the source of the voice he has missed hearing.

Well aware that his unit, his team, strangers that became friends were standing around, he didn’t care if they saw their Sergeant with tears gathering in his eyes.

He didn’t care about anything other than Y/n who was currently standing in front of him. Her flower print dress fit perfectly, lightly moving as she stands there. Her eyes focused on him as he took her in, god she was so beautiful.

“F-Flower?”

“Hi Jamie”

“Wha-how-your really here? I’m not dreaming again am I?”

“No” she giggled, the sound making his heart tingle.

“If you don’t kiss her I will” Dum Dum shouted making everyone laugh. But not Bucky. No it made him move quicker than he’d ever moved before, cupping her face in his hands he smiled before placing his lips to hers. Steve joined in with everyone else as they cheered and clapped.

“You’re really here” Bucky whispered against her lips, resting his forehead against hers breathing in her scent.

“I’m really here”

That night he took her to his hotel room that they had been allowed to stay at, and made love to her for the first time. Three times that night. One more time before they had to say goodbye to each other again.

Just as she was about to get into the car Bucky kissed her one last time, and got down on one knee, proposing to her with a metal nut - that he had found in the room they shared - asking her to marry him before she could answer he promised that once he was back he’d buy her a ring.

Kissing him she held out her hand for him to slid the nut onto her finger.

“I’m getting married to my Flower” he said as the car that carried his love away. Steve smiled at his best friend’s happiness.

January 28th 1945

“Are you sure you’re alright?” Dot asked Y/n as she threw up for the second time that day.

“I’m okay. Must have been something I ate”

“You sure? Didn’t you say you saw James last month?”

“Yes…why?”

“Did you two…you know”

“Wha-oh, yes, a few times” she admitted, her cheeks going bright red.

“Do you think? Maybe? Right?”

“What are you talking about?”

“You might be pregnant” Dot whispered.

Her head spun as the words from her friend settled in. She hadn’t had her period she realised. No. Surely not, right?

“Go and see the doctor after your shift and check” Dot continued.

“I have half an hour off before I start back up again”

“I’ll cover you”

“You’ve got kids you need to-“

“My mom’s here to help me, I’ll be fine”

“But-“

“No buts missy, you need to find out if you are.”

After twenty minutes of arguing back and forth with Dot, Y/n finally caved. Going to the hospital she waited patiently for her bloods to be taken. Completely unaware that across town two families were receiving the worst news.

Getting her keys out of her bag she froze when she saw Steve standing outside her apartment dressed in civilian clothing as Bucky called it now.

“Steve? Hey! What are you doing here?”

“Y/n, I need to talk to you”

“Is it Jamie? Steve? Where’s Bucky?”

But Steve didn’t answer instead he took her keys from her shaking hands and unlocked the door, pushing it open he turned to grasp her arm and guided her in to her apartment. His heart sinking further into his stomach than it already was before coming to her apartment, when he saw the metal nut still sitting on her finger.

“Steve…”

“I failed you Y/n/n I-I’m so sorry”

“He’s okay. He is. I know it”

Shaking his head the scene replying over and over in his head like it had for the past week since he watched his best friend fall to his death “H-he-he’s gone Y/n, I’m so-sorry” He jumps up just in time to catch her as she falls to her knees, a painful sob leaving her lips.

Sadly Steve wasn’t done.

“Y/n…there’s something else, Michael…he’s been killed”

Michael was her half brother. She was close with him, closer to him than she was with her younger siblings. Michael never failed to make her laugh, he always acted like he was the oldest one of the two though there was eight years between them. Y/n was the first person he told when he got his orders from the Army, she hugged him as he cried. It’s not that he didn’t want to fight and help it was that he was terrified.

“No! No you’re lying.”

Helping her stand he took her home where her mom’s screams and cries could be heard from outside the home. Watching as mom and daughter cling together from the doorway Steve let a few tears fall.

Two days after finding out that her best friend turned fiancé and her sweet younger brother were killed Y/n found out she was pregnant. A few weeks later they buried Michael.

On the second of March 1945 Peggy arrived at Y/n’s apartment, eyes red and swollen. They held each other as they cried. Y/n gathered that Steve never got his letter to let him know he was going to be an uncle.

When Peggy noticed the small prodding bump her heart ached. She knew she had to keep the promise that she gave Steve, that she would look after Y/n. Steve had told Peggy that just before Bucky fell he told the blonde to look after his fiancée, the two best friend’s last thoughts were on their best friend and fiancée. Neither one knowing that she pregnant.

A month later Y/n and her family, Winnie and Rebecca were at the cemetery, she smiled sadly when she felt her baby kick for the first time when the preacher said James Buchanan Barnes, they watched as two empty coffins were put into the ground.

She knew that the baby she was growing inside of her would have been so loved and spoiled by its father and uncle Stevie, it broke her heart knowing that her unborn baby would never meet the two greatest men she had ever known.

Five years passed after she lost three men closest to her. After she gave birth to a healthy beautiful baby girl that she named Hope Jamie Barnes, she moved out of the tiny little apartment she had and moved into a farm house that had acres of land.

Just because her Jamie wasn’t with her anymore didn’t mean she was going to give up on the life that he had planned for them. She still wore that metal nut, everyone thought it was strange but luckily for her they never asked about it. However it no longer sat on her finger but around her neck on a silver chain.

A wedding ring sat there now instead.

Two years after Hope was born her mom made her get married. “You’re twenty nine now Y/n you need a husband” her mom told her, reluctantly she agreed and married a man named Frank. At first Frank was okay, nice even but things changed only after a few months of marriage. It started with small things such as telling her what to wear, how to act. Then it turned nasty, the abuse was mental, verbal and physical.

Three years into their marriage she had become numb and use to it all. Became use to the women talking and giggling like school girls when they saw her in the store or on the streets, the same women who were sleeping with her husband. It didn’t bother her anymore that her husband was cheating on her, the more women he had to satisfy him the more he was away from her home, the less she got beaten and berated.

It didn’t even bother her that he had gotten one of his mistresses pregnant or when the mistress’s husband found out and beat Frank to within an inch of his life. In fact she smiled.

Y/n and Peggy’s friendship became non existent after Y/n got married and Peggy married Daniel Sousa, when Peggy and Daniel started dating Peggy had asked Y/n if she was wrong for it but Y/n told her that she deserved to be happy and if he gave that to her then she should have that happiness.

Peggy worried if Steve would have been mad, Y/n had to remind her that he wouldn’t have wanted her to live a life of loneliness.

When Hope was five she was wise for her age, she knew Frank wasn’t her father, she knew her daddy had passed away when he protected the country from the bad guys. Hope enjoyed her nighttime stories where her mama would tell her all about her father, hearing about how funny, kind and loving her father was always made the little girl smile. One night Y/n showed Hope the few photographs she had of James, Hope giggled and pointed at her eyes and then at James’s “same mommy same”. It was true, Hope had the same colour eyes as Bucky and like Bucky’s eyes they changed lighter when she was happy or giggling, turned darker when she was sad or when she was poorly.

Every Sunday Y/n and Hope had a routine, they would go to the cemetery to put flowers down on the graves of James and Steve. They would sit on a blanket and eat the sandwiches that Y/n would take with them, they would sit, eat and talk for hours - depending on the weather. Hope would show the headstones all her drawings and tell them all about her schooling and friends, told them her favourite colour - the rainbow that’s her favourite colour.

Y/n knew that there was no bodies in the coffins but that didn’t mean she wouldn’t sit there with her daughter in her lap and tell the two empty graves that she loved and missed them. Every time.

It was still a tradition that they both did even as Y/n got older and weaker.

In 1970 her husband was killed, Franks brother Robert was arrested and charged with his murder. Robert found out that his wife was having an affair with his brother. Y/n went to see him in prison after Robert sent her a letter begging her to see him, he swore that he didn’t do it. That it was a man with a silver arm. Y/n believed him when he said he didn’t do it, he was with his sister, her husband and their children, along with Robert’s children. But she didn’t believe him about a man with a silver arm, that was a bit far fetched.

At Franks funeral Y/n stood there with Hope on her left side and the nine children he had with nine different women. She tried to comfort the children he had with the women he had cheated on her with, they allowed it until everyone left and it was just them standing at the grave. His oldest started laughing causing the others to join in, Hope looked at her mom with a raised eyebrow that reminded her so much of Bucky, she just shrugged.

They told Y/n that they were happy he was finally gone. Told her that they hated him and was glad he was dead.

It surprised her but they were at the age where they realised that their parents marriages broke up when their mom cheated on their dad, or when they saw Frank hit their mom. It was nine teenagers/young adults who knew that what the preacher was saying as the coffin was lowered in the ground that it was all lies, he wasn’t a good man, he wasn’t a good husband or father, he was everything they hated. He was everything the five boys had promised that they would never turn in to. He was everything the four girls promised that they would never end up with.

They all kept in touch throughout the years, it was nice. And through them years all nine of his offspring kept their promises.

As the years went on Y/n became more and more proud of Hope and the woman she had become. Hope got married and had children, her first born son was named James, her second son was named Steve.

“M-mom there’s someone here to see you” Hope stuttered from the doorway.

“W-who i-is it darling?”

“I-he-hold on”

Hope appeared at the door with a nervous smile on her face, her fingers twisting together as a man walked slowly towards her. His eyes going to the woman and then to the man behind him, he was scared.

“Hope?”

“Mom-“

Y/n slowly turned to face the doorway, her eyes widening as she sees the ghost of her best friend towering over her daughter.

“S-Stevie? You’ve come to take me to Jamie?”

Steve frowned looking at the woman who was the last person on his mind before the plane crashed in to the water, his best friend who had aged yet her eyes remained the same. Then he looked at Hope confusion written on his face, she looked up at him and smiled sadly.

“Mom I’m just going to get you a drink.” Nodding her head to Steve and Sam to follow her she went into the kitchen. “She thinks your taking her to heaven to see my dad”

“Dad?”

“James? He’s my father”

Steve’s heart thumped painfully in his chest. When Hope answered the door telling him that she was Y/n’s daughter he assumed that she had married and had children, he did not expect the woman in front of him to be the daughter of his best friend who he watched fall to his death.

“What?”

“Bucky Barnes is my father…you’re my uncle, well that’s what my mom always called you.”

“Oh. Now I see it, it’s your eyes”

“Mom always said I had the same eyes as him” she laughed.

Steve goes to open his mouth when there’s a sound of a cane hitting the floor, all three turn to face the doorway where Y/n stood.

“Are you re-really alive and not just m-my imagination?”

“I’m really here Y/n/n”

“H-how?”

“When I crashed the plane-ow stop hitting me” he cries out when she hits him with her walking cane, Sam and Hope laugh.

“Still mad at you for crashing that plane”

“I’m sorry. I was frozen and they found me a few years ago” Steve finished his explanation. Y/n nodded and sat down, being ninety five years old her legs weren’t as strong as they once were.

“This is my daughter, she’s beautiful isn’t she?”

“She is, she’s got Bucky’s eyes”

“Yes she has. Who’s your friend?”

“This is Sam, he’s the one that helped me track you down”

“I-it’s nice to meet you Sam.” When Y/n reached out to shake Sam’s hand Steve noticed a glint of a necklace. He watched as her free hand went to the necklace and started lightly tugging on it, he wasn’t the only one.

“Mom? Mom your alright, your safe don’t worry” Hope says softly, moving closer slowly. Sam looked at Steve worriedly.

“I-I don’t-don’t let him hurt me anymore”

“Mom he’s dead, he can’t hurt you anymore I promise” Hope helped pull the necklace out, handing her the thing she knew her mom was trying to hold.

Steve’s breath get caught in his throat at seeing the metal nut Bucky gave her all those years ago.

“S-Steve? Your dead. Hope wh-who is he? I-it’s not Stevie, he’s dead”

“It’s okay mom, he’s a friend. Let’s get you back to bed okay?” Turning to Steve and Sam telling them she’d be back in a few, they both nod.

Waiting patiently in the kitchen Steve can hear Hope calm Y/n down, his heart breaking when Y/n asks for Jamie. When Hope comes downstairs she offers the two a drink, both declines politely.

“Mom keeps forgetting things, she’s been like this for a while now.”

“The thing on her necklace, what is it?” Though he knew he just couldn’t see it lasting this long or that she even kept it.

“My dad proposed to her with it, it’s a nut. She’s kept it on her chain ever since-well, she’s wore it since he gave it her”

“Did she ever marry? Have other kids?”

“Yes, he died in 1970 and no I’m her only child”

“I’m sor-“

“Don’t apologise, bastard deserved it”

After an hour or so the men take their leave, the blonde asking if he was able to come back and see Y/n again, Hope said yes.

The year was now 2016, Y/n’s health declining as she was nearing one hundred. The doctors told Hope that it would be better to keep her in hospital for the rest of her time on earth, Hope told them that, that wasn’t going to happen. Y/n had told Hope that when she was going to die that she wanted to go when she was at home. No matter what.

Steve had showed up one day to talk to Hope, to tell her that her father was alive after all this time. Hope begged him not to tell Y/n. Y/n struggled to understand and come to terms with the fact that Steve was alive, she had grown so confused that she started to tug on her necklace. Hope didn’t want to imagine how her mom would react to the news that the love of her life was alive, not when she spent so long mourning him.

At first Steve was confused but understood at the same time. He told Hope that he and Bucky fought and the only way he could get him to snap out of whatever Hydra had done to him was by saying Y/ns name, Hope smiled at that. Hope asked Steve if he had told James all about her and how her mom was still alive, Steve said no but with her permission he would. And he did.

After seventy years of going without a father it was strange when she met Bucky for the first time, a man who didn’t look a day over thirty was her father when she looked like his mother, it was strange.

Bucky cried. Cried for never knowing Y/n was pregnant in the first place. Cried for never being there throughout Hope growing in her mother’s stomach. Cried for never being there for either one of them for nearly seventy years. Hugging his daughter for the first time ever Bucky crumbled.

Hope was very honest about hers and Y/n’s life, told Bucky how Y/n’s husband was a cheating abusive arsehole. Both Bucky and Steve clenched their fists at hearing that. Shocked when Hope told them that apparently a man with a silver arm had killed Frank, and because Bucky had his arm covered and gloves on Hope didn’t realise that it was her father that did it.

Bucky was open and honest about what had happened to him, expecting his daughter to look at him differently so when she threw her arms around him and cried he was shocked.

It took Bucky exactly twenty three minutes and fourteen seconds for him to ask when he could see Y/n. Having to think it over she agreed but on the condition that she was the one that would tell Y/n the truth.

Telling her mom that the man she had still been in love with after all those years since she had lost him, that he was still alive was the hardest conversation she had to have with her mom. Y/n didn’t believe her, of course she didn’t she’s spent seventy years mourning him. Seventy years wishing she saw him again, hoping and praying that he would still love her the way she still loved him.

Hope told Y/n that she had met him, hugged him, laughed with him but she still didn’t believe her.

A week after telling Y/n that Bucky was still alive her health deteriorated. Hope had to tell Bucky and Steve that Y/n didn’t have long left. Bucky was determined to see his love for the last time.

James stood in front of the house that Y/n had made a home since she left Brooklyn, the two floored farm house stood proudly in front of acres of land, due to his enhanced senses he could smell the lingering smell of animal food and waste. Hope had told him all about the animals Y/n rescued over the years, told him that when she was seven they had three horses, cows and goats, that in recent years Y/n had been rescuing cats and dogs from the streets or abusive homes rehoming them to those she trusted. Bucky smiled at hearing that she had lived the life he wanted for the both of them, smiled at hearing that Y/n’s kindness and love for animals never stopped.

Checking his hair was fine for the umpteenth time in the two hours it took them to get there he turned to face Steve.

“You ready Buck?”

“Y-yeah” Steve knocks on the door and they both wait patiently for Hope to answer.

“Hi, come on in-oh”

“T-they wanted to come, hope that’s okay” Bucky explained. Behind him and Steve stood the rest of the Avengers.

“We’ve heard all about your mom ever since blondie came out of ice, wanted to meet her” Tony spoke leaning in between the two super soldiers to hold his hand out.

“Oh right, come in.” Leading them all upstairs where Y/n was, Bucky’s nerves sky rocketed the closer he got to the bedroom. “You ready?” Hope asked.

“Yeah. She knows I’m here right?”

“She does, if it helps she’s nervous too”

Nodding his head he watched with a steady breath as his daughter - which he still found weird saying - twisted the door knob and opened the door.

Though older and frail Bucky thought she was still the most beautiful woman he had ever laid eyes on. His eyes stayed on her face as he moved closer, with every step he took his heart started to beat slower.

“J-Jamie?”

Wetting his lips and gulping he nodded “hi Flower”

“Took you long enough to come and get me”

“I know my love b-but I’m here now”

“Are we going to see Stevie?”

“Stevie’s right here darling”

“Is my mama going to be there too?”

Frowning he looked back to Hope as she stands at the doorway with everyone behind her. Hope shook her head and mouthed “she thinks you’re taking her to heaven”. His frown deepened, looking back at Y/n whose eyes didn’t move away from him.

“I’ve missed you Flower”

“I’ve missed you too Jamie. Ha-have you met Hope? She’s your daughter Jamie”

“I have met her, beautiful isn’t she?”

“She is. The best thing I’ve ever done”

“I’m so proud of you, you’ve raised our daughter amazingly”

“Sit down silly” sitting on bed next to her he took his gloves off and held both her hands when she reached for him. Y/n didn’t flinch when his silver hand touched her. “Don’t let Frank hurt Hope okay? Y-you have to promise me Jamie th-that you’ll lo-look after her”

“Doll he’s-I promise that no one will ever hurt her”

“Good. He’s mean. He hurts me Jamie”

“I know doll I know, I’m sorry I wasn’t there to protect you from him”

“Not your fa-wh-who are they Jamie?”

“They’re Stevies friends Flower”

Hope nudged Steve further into the room and nods to the others letting them know it’s okay for them to go in too. Steve says hello and introduces the team to her, each giving her a smile.

For three hours Steve and Y/n talked about growing up together and all the things they use to get up to, everyone laughed and asked Y/n questions about the two super soldiers, she answered them as best as she could sometimes she repeated herself or looked panicked when she saw strangers standing in her room.

Bucky though held her hand with the both of his, his eyes on her the whole time. Tracing over each line with his eyes, his heart clenching when he saw the unmistakable sight of a scar that ran down the side of her face.

His breath got caught in his throat when she took out the metal nut around the necklace. “Y-you kept it?” He asked interrupting when Sam was talking about.

“My Jamie gave it me during the war, he proposed to me” she smiled “you look like him”

“Do I?”

“Yes, but my Jamie was more handsome”

“Was he now?”

“Oh yes-“ a yawn cuts her off. Hope tells everyone that it was best if they left now so she could get some rest, and they do. Each say their goodbyes and waits for Steve and Bucky downstairs.

“We’ll come and see you tomorrow okay?” Steve says after he pulls away from giving her a hug and a kiss to her forehead. Y/n nods and smiles. “I’ll wait for downstairs Buck”

Bucky nods, then looks at Hope who understands without being verbally told that Bucky wanted a few minutes alone, she follows behind Steve.

“I have always loved you, you know? I still love you. I’m sorry that I didn’t come home to you when I promised you over and over that I would, I’m sorry I let you down Flower”

“Y-you didn’t let me down Jamie, never.”

Bucky smiles softly at her, watching as her eyes start to droop. “I’ll let you get some rest my love. I’ll see you tomorrow, I promise”

“O-okay Jamie. S-see you tom-tomorrow” Giving her a kiss to her forehead he stands and moves to the door, taking one last look at his first and only love.

“Thank you for the best years of my life”

He says before shutting the door and heads slowly down the stairs.

After Hope says her goodbyes and gives her dad a hug she busies herself cleaning the kitchen, she smiles happily to herself seeing her parents together something she had always wanted to experience.

She doesn’t know that her mom is in her bed with her hand wrapped around the piece of metal that she had wore and cherished from the moment James gave it her, she doesn’t know her mom is thinking about meeting her Jamie again.

She doesn’t know that her mom takes her last breath with a small smile on her lips.

A year after loosing the love of his life Bucky had to bury his only daughter, heart attack took her. In 2023 Tony had perfected his father’s Time Machine with the help from Bruce. Steve was going to be returning the stones, they all gathered together in the empty space and watched as Steve vanished.

“4…3…2…1” Bruce counted down for Steve’s arrival.

Once the smoke cleared Bucky had his eyes down as he knew that Steve wasn’t going to be coming back, he knew he was going to go back to live a life with Peggy. His head snapped up when he heard the voice that he always heard in his sleep.

There stood on the platform was Steve, Y/n and a two year old Hope.

“Fl-Flower”

“You died Jamie. You promised me you would be safe but-“

Bucky cuts her off by pressing his lips against hers, holding both of his flowers tightly.

One month after Steve brought Y/n and Hope to the future, Bucky and Y/n got married. A month after that she finds out that baby Barnes number two would be arriving.

“I love you Flower”

“I love you Jamie”

Tags: @imcinnamoons | @pigeonmama | @capsbestgirl77

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thatdammchickennugget · 9 months ago

Text

The Hottest One

pairing -firefighter!james potter x fem!reader

summary - your friend dares you to give cookies to the hottest firefighter

warnings - none

wordcount - 1k

a/n - inspired by this tiktok 💕

masterlist

The fire station is just a few steps away now, and you’re already starting to regret this whole thing. Your friends had a wicked sense of humor, and that’s exactly how you ended up here, holding a tin of freshly baked cookies, your heart beating a little too fast.

“It’ll be fun,” they said, giggling over drinks. “Just ring the bell, tell them you brought cookies, and ask for the hottest one. Come on, how hard could it be?”

Apparently, harder than you thought. You’re not even inside yet, and your nerves are threatening to send you running in the opposite direction. But you made a promise—no backing out. So, you muster all your courage, march up to the intercom next to the entrance, and press the button. There’s a brief, crackling silence before a voice comes through.

“Fire Station 7, how can I help you?” The voice is female, warm, and friendly, and you can hear a hint of curiosity, probably because they’re not used to getting unexpected visitors on a lazy afternoon.

“Uh, hi!” you start, sounding way too enthusiastic. You take a deep breath, trying to calm yourself. “I’m here because… um, I brought cookies.”

There’s a pause, then a little laugh on the other end. “Cookies, huh? Well, that’s new. Any particular reason?”

You try to swallow down your embarrassment. “It’s… a dare. From my friends. The cookies are still warm.”

There’s a beat of silence, and then the woman on the intercom bursts out laughing. It’s not unkind; if anything, she sounds delighted. “Well, I can’t say no to that.”

You hear a muffled conversation in the background, but it’s hard to make out the words. After a moment, the voice returns. “Alright, we’re sending someone down. Just wait right there.”

“Can you make sure it’s a hot one?” you blurt out before you can freeze up.

She laughs again and when she speaks again, there’s a slight teasing edge to her tone. “I’ll make sure it’s the hottest one.”

Your stomach flips. Oh no, what did I just sign myself up for?

You stand there, fidgeting with the tin of cookies, glancing nervously around the front of the building. It’s warm out, and you can feel the sun on your skin, but it does nothing to stop the nervous chill running down your spine. This whole thing is ridiculous—what if they laugh at you? What if they—

The door swings open, and you nearly drop the cookies.

Standing in the doorway is a guy who looks like he just stepped off a movie poster. Tall, broad shoulders, dark hair that falls messily over his forehead, and a pair of round glasses that somehow only make him look even more charming. He’s wearing the dark blue uniform of the station, and there’s a slightly amused smile playing on his lips as he looks at you, eyebrows raised.

“So,” he says, his voice smooth and warm, “I hear there are cookies involved.”

You try not to stare, but it’s hard when he’s right there, looking exactly like the kind of guy you’d imagine when someone says “the hottest firefighter.” He’s got a boyish grin, like he’s in on some inside joke, and the way he leans casually against the doorframe makes it seem like this sort of thing happens every day.

“I—yeah, I, um…” You clear your throat, realizing you’ve been gaping at him. “I brought cookies. It was, uh, a dare.” You force a smile, trying to salvage whatever confidence you have left. “They said I had to give them to the hottest firefighter, so… here I am.”

The guy’s smile grows, his eyes twinkling behind his glasses. “Well, I’m glad to know I made the cut.” He steps forward, his gaze flicking down to the tin in your hands. “I’m James, by the way.”

You tell him your name, trying not to stutter. “Nice to meet you.”

He repeats your name under his breath, like he’s testing how it sounds, and there’s something about the way he says it that makes your heart skip. “I’ve got to say, this is the best dare I’ve heard of in a while. Usually, people just come by for a tour or to ask for directions.”

You laugh, a little surprised by how easy it feels. “Well, I like to be original.”

“I can see that.” He takes the tin from you, his fingers brushing against yours for just a second, and you’re pretty sure he doesn’t miss the way you flinch at the contact. “And what kind of cookies are these, exactly?”

“Chocolate chip,” you say, relieved to be talking about something normal. “With a little bit of sea salt on top. It’s supposed to make them taste better.”

“Oh, I’m sold.” He opens the tin, glancing down at the cookies, then back up at you. “You wouldn’t happen to be trying to bribe your way out of a parking ticket, would you? Because if so, I don’t think I have the authority to make that disappear.”

You laugh, shaking your head. “No, no bribing. Just fulfilling a dare and hoping not to make a complete fool of myself.”

James looks at you for a moment, then grins. “Well, if it helps, I’m flattered. And I think I should let you know that my shift ends in about an hour.” He tilts his head slightly, still holding that infuriatingly charming smile. “If you’re around, maybe I could return the favor by grabbing a coffee or something?”

You blink, caught off guard by how casual he sounds. “I—yeah, that sounds… that sounds nice.”

“Great,” he says, and he’s still smiling as he backs up, holding the tin carefully in one hand. “I’ll see you then, love. And thanks for the cookies.”

You stand there, feeling like you’re stuck in some kind of strange dream, and as the door starts to close, you hear someone calling out from inside.

“Oi, Prongs! Who got you all flustered?”

A dark-haired guy with a mischievous grin pokes his head around the doorframe, and James just rolls his eyes, turning to give him a quick shove.

You can’t help but smile as the door closes, blocking out the sound of their banter. Your heart’s still pounding, but for once, it’s not just from nerves. Maybe your friends were onto something after all—maybe a dare was exactly what you needed.

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hirayalore · 5 months ago

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the one where sirius black escapes from azkaban and finds you.

pairing: sirius black x fem!reader

word count: 2.8k

rating: PG-15

content: angst, established relationship au

warning/s: swearing, kinda canon, and once more a lot of angst!!!!

note. well,,,, it’s abvious that your girl is going through it shdjshdjhs i basically have a lot of sirius imagines in my brain that i would like to write. this is the second fic i wrote that has a similar theme of sirius being reunited with a lover after he escaped azkaban and it’s likely that it won’t be the last hehehe

Sirius knew that it wasn’t wise to be here.

And yet here he was, in his Animagus form, watching you as you took your usual evening stroll at the park near your apartment building.

He was aware that after the war—after the death of Lily and James, after almost all of your friends who were part of the Order met the same demise, after his imprisonment because of what Peter Pettigrew made everyone believe—you moved to a small and quiet Muggle village, far from the wizarding world that tore you apart and changed you for the worse.

From what he has observed for days now, you were working at this old bookshop that was run by a family friend. You were some sort of assistant, arranging the books being delivered every other week and looking after the store throughout the day, acting as the cashier and all. You always wore different light colored blouses during your shift, tucked in faded jeans and matched with beige sandals, as if it was some sort of prescribed uniform that you had to wear during working hours.

Sirius could remember how the world felt like it stopped spinning when he first caught a glimpse of you again, finally finding you after weeks of trying to locate where you might have fled to. Despite how your face has matured over time and your aura has grown to be more sophisticated, he still saw the girl he fell in love with at Hogwarts, and it caused his heart to ache a thousand times more.

Nonetheless, he supposed that this new life was better for you.

You were no longer at risk to be hurt or in danger now that you were here. He could see that you were contented, that you were healed in some way after everything that you experienced—but he couldn’t deny that a small part of him wished that you at least stayed in contact with someone from the Order, knowing that it would assure Sirius that you were being looked after and wasn’t completely on your own.

Slowly following you to the bakery you often visited to grab something to eat, Sirius stopped across the street and sat there on the pavement, gazing at you from the window.

To passersby, he appeared like an intimidating large black dog waiting for his owner to come get him again. It was due to his eye-catching guise that there were people who looked at him anxiously as they walked along his path, or those who purposely avoided marching too close in fear of being mauled or chased after.

He paid them no attention whatsoever. All that mattered to him was you—and how when you turned to your left, gaze flickering outside the bakery and coincidentally landing on Sirius, he saw the instant flash of recognition that spread on your features, causing his furry black ears to shoot straight up.

****

You almost dropped the paper bag being handed to you by the cashier at the sight of the black dog on the other side of the street.

It can’t be… you told yourself, swallowing hard as the dog began to stand up from its sitting position and turn away, now walking towards the bushes where you could easily lose sight of it.

You might have been living peacefully at this Muggle town you’ve grown accustomed with over the years, have done a great job in mingling with Muggles and pretending to be one of them, but it has been two weeks since a copy of the Daily Prophet arrived at your doorstep that told you of Sirius’ escape from Azkaban, and it has easily brought you back to the world that you wished you could easily forget.

Hence, every part of you was screaming that it was him.

That the black dog you just made eye contact with was Sirius Black.

No matter how many years it has been, you couldn’t help but feel a rush of something familiar—something long forgotten that it overwhelmed you for a quick second before you found yourself running out of the bakery, sprinting to where the black dog had gone.

You ran as fast as you could, heart pounding inside your chest, chasing after him even though you have completely lost track of where he decided to go.

You ran around the area until your knees gave out, until you had yourself convinced that maybe you were only seeing things and it wasn’t a black dog that you saw earlier.

You stopped running at an alleyway, now covered in sweat as you tried regulating your breathing from the marathon you just did. Your chest made it seem like it was close to giving out, and your eyes were stinging from either the cold or the realization of how much you needed to see Sirius.

As you turned your heel around, about to walk back to your apartment and gather your thoughts there, a shadowed figure was standing before you a few steps away, his hair long and matted, his clothes tattered and large.

You stopped breathing.

“Sirius?” you whispered, taking a purposeful step forward.

He didn’t move. He remained frozen in place as you approached him, reaching to where he was and courageously placing your palms against his cheeks, a gesture meant to check if he was really here like your eyes were showing you.

Sirius closed his eyes, inhaling sharply at the contact, and without words spoken, you pulled him close, hauling his head down to lay on your shoulder and embracing him tightly as you let out a surprised gasp at what was happening at this moment.

When you fled from your old life, you swore you never wanted to go back. You were convinced that it was no use staying when everybody was against you—when Sirius, the man you loved and the man you were supposed to marry, was convicted for a crime you knew he could never do.

Regardless of how much you pleaded to everyone to believe in you, they never did. In their eyes, Sirius Black was a treacherous friend to James Potter, that he was the reason why James and Lily were killed that night and poor little Harry had to grow up without his parents. Even Remus, his best friend, had his doubts about Sirius’ loyalty that it caused a temporary wound to yours and his friendship.

Regardless of everything though, regardless of how much you stayed away from your old life and tried moving on, you never stopped thinking about Sirius. You were always haunted by his fate, by what happened to your friends, and by what could have happened if only all you had been wiser with your decision in switching Peter as the new Secret Keeper last minute.

“You’re here.” You pulled back, staring at Sirius who was still speechless, your eyes flickering to every part of his face as if you were memorizing his features. “You’re really here. How did you find me?”

A ghost of a smile appeared in his mouth. “I have my ways.”

“Of course, you do.” You breathed out, disbelief still lacing your tone. “But you—it isn’t safe. You’re supposed to be hiding. The Dementors—”

“I know,” he said, wincing a bit at the reminder of those awful creatures. “It’s unsafe for me to be here, but I had to. I just had to see how you were. I’ll leave as soon as—”

“No.” You shook your head, your palms falling from his face so that you could hold onto his arms. “Don’t be ridiculous. You’re coming with me.”

“____, let’s not—”

“I wasn’t asking for permission, Sirius.” You told him sharply. “Come on.”

He was about to protest, to reiterate that it wasn’t safe of him to be here nor was it safe for you to be seen in contact with him, but before he could let a word out, you were already tugging him with you hurriedly to where your apartment was, aiming to go there quicker to avoid detection.

****

You were like in some sort of frantic trance, he could see that.

As soon the both of you arrived inside your apartment, you were locking the door manually and then grabbing your wand that was hidden in some sort of cabinet, soon muttering a bunch of incantations at every corner of your place in what Sirius assumed was your way of ensuring that he wouldn’t get discovered here.

You have always been a smart witch, way too smart for everyone when the both of you were still studying at Hogwarts. Even though he was considered intelligent himself, you were on another level. It reached to the point that professors allowed you to visit the restricted section of the library, keen in helping you foster your potential by giving you access to advanced magical studies—the same advanced magical studies that he assumed were where you learned the spells you were chanting right now.

When you were done, you walked towards him again, only to abruptly pause.

You gazed at him, this expression on your face making it obvious that you weren’t used to seeing him so near and within reach. Sirius reckoned that he looked horrible, with dark circles under his eyes and a thin, gaunt face that was vastly different from the appearance he had when you first fell in love with him. The realization made him a bit self-conscious, like he didn’t deserve to be here nor should have shown himself to you in such a state.

But the second you started striding to him once more, this soft smile on your face as you reached for his hands, it made him remember how he managed to survive being in Azkaban all these years. It was the confidence that even if everybody easily turned their backs on him—he still had you.

“Do you want to take a bath first? Get settled in?” you asked.

He was silent at first, and then he spoke. “You’re handling this way easier than I expected.”

“What do you mean?”

“Aren’t you angry at me?” he replied to your question with another query himself.

You raised an eyebrow. “For coming here?”

“For everything.” His tongue felt like sandpaper. “For being the reckless git I have always been. For getting myself locked up. For leaving you. For letting James and Lily—”

You cut him off before he could finish speaking, squeezing his arms. “Love, that wasn’t your fault.”

“But it is. I was a coward. I shouldn’t have insisted on making Peter the Secret Keeper. I should have taken the responsibility myself, regardless of whether those bloody Death Eaters hunted me down and tortured me.”

Aside from Dumbledore himself, you were only the other person that was told that Peter would be the Secret Keeper instead of Sirius. It was Sirius who told you so, not being able to keep such important information from the person he trusted the most. And so when the Potters’ location was discovered, you believed Sirius’ suspicion of Peter being the one to blame.

However, Sirius decided to go alone when he went to confront Peter about it, thus being caught up with their friend’s uncharacteristically clever plan of framing him for not only James and Lily’s death, but his murder and the murder of several Muggles as well.

“It’s not your fault,” you repeated firmly. “We had no way of foreseeing the future.”

“He’s alive, you know,” he muttered. “Peter. He’s alive.”

At that, you leaned back a bit, surprised by the declaration. Although you didn’t believe that Sirius could kill him, you didn’t believe that Peter was still alive either.

“I saw him. On the Daily Prophet. He’s the rat perched on Weasley’s shoulder,” he said. “There’s no mistaking it. I could recognize his Animagus form anywhere.”

You pressed your lips together. “Are you sure?”

“Yes, I’m completely positive. It’s why—” he sighed, exhaling through his nose— “it’s why I escaped, ____. I have to avenge James and Lily. I have to talk to Dumbledore. There’s a lot of unfinished business I have to attend to now that the Dark Lord is rising again.”

“Unfinished business?”

“Yes, and Harry, I have to talk to him, make him understand and—”

“And what about me?”

It caught him off guard. “What?”

“Me, Sirius,” you retracted your hands, taking a step back and looking at him with absolute hurt, “what about me? Did you just plan on escaping, hurting everyone, getting your good old revenge without regard to what’s going to happen to us now that we can finally be together?”

He opened his mouth. “Don’t… don’t put it that way.”

“Then how should I put it? I mean, if I hadn’t seen you earlier, you probably wouldn’t have talked to me. You wouldn’t have shown yourself.”

“I didn’t want you to get involved,” he reasoned, attempting to regain the proximity you two had before you moved away. “I’ve been watching you for days. Weeks. And I know better than to ruin the peace you have now.”

“Peace? You don’t know what you’re talking about.” You scoffed. “Do you really think what I have now is peace? Before you escaped, the knowledge of you being Azkaban with those Dementors—knowing that I couldn’t do anything, knowing that I couldn’t talk to you and make sure that you were fine—” Your voice broke and your eyes began to well up rapidly. “I hadn’t slept properly since then, Sirius. Do you know why I still get newspapers from the Daily Prophet? It’s because if for some reason they found you lifeless in your prison cell—perhaps I’d finally gain the courage to stop pretending that I still want to live without you by my side.”

The implication of your words struck him. He didn’t think that his absence impacted you in that sense, that while the thought of you comforted him in the decade he has spent locked away from society, you felt the opposite, instead tormented by his case and the weight of his absence.

Without hesitating, he engulfed you in a hug, strong arms wounding itself tightly around your waist. “I—” He didn’t know what to say. He has never been good at words, anyway. “Darling, you’re the most important person to me.”

You cried on his shoulder, returning his embrace. “It doesn’t feel that way.”

“I just thought…” He closed his eyes in regret for ever thinking in this manner. “I just thought you’d be better without me. That you would have wanted it. You just… you looked okay. I didn’t want to ruin it.”

“You’re a twat, Sirius.”

Despite the insult, he found himself chuckling at the reminiscent feeling of being scolded by you, his hold becoming more unyielding. “I am. Perhaps even the bloody worst one out there.”

“You are. I’m glad you know.”

“I know, love.”

“And yet I wouldn’t have it any other way,” you muttered, a bit muffled. “I’d take you back. Every single time. So, please, always come back to me.”

He drew his head back, about to assure you about never wanting to leave you again, when he noticed your necklace and its pendant that twinkled slightly due to the light hitting it in the perfect spot.

The more he stared, the more he realized that it wasn’t an ordinary pendant or charm. It was a ring.

Your engagement ring. The exact ring he gave to you on his knees when he proposed.

Sirius never cried. He wasn’t that type of man who channeled emotions that proper way. He often resorted into inappropriate laughter or anger—but this moment right here, at the sight of your engagement ring dangling against your collarbone, the very object that he never imagined you would still have in your possession after everything that had commenced—it made his hands tremble, his throat to suddenly burn, his breath to hitch, and before he could control his composure, the dam cracked.

“Sirius?” You exclaimed, worried.

“You still have it.” He declared in between sobs, delicately adjusting your clothes so he could see the ring better on your neck. “The ring. The engagement ring.”

You glanced down, as if forgetting you had it, and smiled slightly in understanding. “Why wouldn’t I? You told me it cost a fortune.” You teased him.

“____,” he said your name again, groaning and pressing his forehead on yours, tears still streaming down his cheeks that you were wiping away with the pads of your thumbs, “tell me anything you need. I’ll give it to you. I’ll give you everything you want.”

He kissed you passionately and you didn’t think twice about kissing him back.

“I only need you, love,” you murmured. “Just you. Just us. That’s all I need.”

He nodded vigorously. “You have me. You always did, and you always will.” He couldn’t stop kissing you, couldn’t stop doing the one thing he felt like could make you grasp how important you were to him. “Once I fix everything, I’ll give you a good life. I won’t let anything get in between us ever again.”

Even if you wanted to reply, you couldn’t, for Sirius never strayed his mouth away from yours, as if he was afraid that the loss of touch would separate the both of you once more.

gentle reminder: this author loves feedback! let her know your thoughts if you enjoyed reading this fic and you’ll add 100+ points in her writing motivation meter ♡

#sirius black x reader #sirius black #sirius black imagines #sirius black drabbles #harry potter #harry potter fanfiction #harry potter imagines #marauders #marauders imagines #marauders fanfiction #mauraders drabbles #marauders scenarios #sirius black scenarios #sirius black x you #sirius black x y/n #sirius black fanfiction #harry potter drabbles

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skywalkoverme · 1 month ago

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𝐏𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐬𝐬

a/n: Rewatched the movie and got a new angle on him...

𐙚James Kelly x Fem! Reader 𐙚 18+ MDNI

Summary: James starts chatting with a porn star.

Warnings/contains: dom! male, sub! fem, reader is a porn star, oral (m recieve), car sex, raw sex, multiple orgasms, crying during sex, rough sex, online sex, meetups, choking (m recieve), long distance relationship, somewhat...proof read-- english is not my first language!

Word Count: 3.5k // More on my Master list! + follow & reblog pls

Present: October 2011

James spent the day cleaning. He washed his sheets and made the bed nicely, fluffed pillows and vacuumed his rugs. In the living room, he wiped down surfaces and dusted any and everything. After months of talking online, today was the day he’d meet you.

In March, James saved enough to buy a laptop. Something nice, sleek and compact; he drove home happily with the box in his passenger seat. The man excitedly ran into the house and quickly set up his laptop on the coffee table. Of course, he initially used it for its natural purposes: digital storage, videos on car maintenance, porn, etc. but he found himself on websites he hadn’t figured existed. Chatrooms and other social media sites.

CHAT WITH HOT GIRLS NOW

Naturally, he clicked the link and ended up on a lewd site with overstimulating images and large text. His face scrunched in disgust, and confusion but he scrolled through the message boxes. He’d seen stuff of this nature on his phone before, sure and he knew a bit about online viruses and how they spread but this site looked a bit different. Legit(?)

He went through the chat boxes, faces and more faces of women in layers of makeup, voluminous or cropped hair, piercings, some without; some dangling handcuffs and others bent in positions holding their undergarments between their teeth.

He switched away from the tab and caught his breath. This was too much. Sure, he was bit hot but none of these photos made him hard. It was too performative. James sighed and spread his thighs, letting his laptop sit on his thighs. He opened the tab again the website forced him to put a card on file. He rolled his eyes and did so. The man clicked the filter for his type.

CLICK MENU FOR MORE

*[Your Race/Ethnicity]

*[Your hair color]

*[Your height]

*[Amateur]

He had to admit, he was curious. Curious and horny. The man found a few women that fit the search and scrolled through the list before he came across your “name”. Princess. He knew it was a stage name, but as he stared at the “ACTIVE” icon, it didn’t matter. He read your short bio: “Video vixen” and proceeded to click ‘chat now’.

Maybe his cursor slipped or something of that nature, but his web cam turned on. He hadn’t noticed it was on as he studied the moving chat tab. You were texting him.

You: Hi, I’m Princess. It’s nice to meet you.

James: Hi, Princess.

You: What’s your name?

James hesitated. He shouldn’t tell you his real name but it’s so common, you’d never figure out his identity. You smiled from the other side of your screen, staring at his face in the corner of your screen.

James: James.

You: You’re very handsome.

James: Thank you. I’m sure you tell every guy that texts you that.

You: Not every guy actually shows his face.

James’ eyebrows furrowed as he read your message over again. I’m not showing my face. He thought to himself.

James: What do you mean?

You: ? Your camera, it’s on.

James’ cheeks turned a bright cherry red before noticing the active camera. He shut his laptop and pushed it aside on the couch. “How embarrassing.” He grumbled to himself and held his hair, clutching the dark locks tightly. I’m so pathetic on that stupid site! How’d I not notice the camera was on?! “Shit.”

You bit the inside of your cheek. He was the first handsome man you’d seen in a long time on this site. It was a shame to see him go but there was no way to connect back unless he did it himself. You waited for the next user to show up on your screen before starting to chat with them.

James had nearly forgotten about the embarrassing accident as he smoked a cigarette and finished cooking his pasta. That was until he sat down on the couch and saw his black laptop on the third cushion. He sighed and flicked on the television; James leaned back and held his bowl of food to his chest, following the football game.

That was rude of me. She probably thinks I’m an asshole. Princess… I never meant to offend you.

He tapped his foot on his rug before opening his laptop. To his surprise, the tab was still open. He watched as the loading throbber spun. CONNECTING YOU TO ‘PRINCESS’ His heart raced as soon as he read the page. Instantly, he was connected back, his camera off this time.

James: I’m sorry

You: Hi! I’m Princess. It’s nice to meet you!

James’ eyebrows furrowed. Of course, this is anonymous. He thought.

James: It’s me, James.

You: Oh!! Hi again.

James: Hi. I want to apologize for leaving the chat like that.

You: It’s ok, I understand if you are busy.

James: No. I was just stunned that my camera was on.

You: If you want, we can both turn our cameras on.

Without much thought, James agrees.

James: Sure, Princess.

You turned on your camera and stared at your screen. It would be an understatement to say that he fell in love with you at first sight. You looked different from your photo but in the best ways. You bit the corner of your bottom lip as you sit in your spill of white sheets on your bed. Pretty pink lingerie covered your body, and a pretty collar held around your throat. He admired the way your hair fell over your shoulders and those large brown eyes that looked deeply at the pixels.

He nearly forgot to turn on his camera! James sat up and wiped any loose seasonings that might’ve been on his shirt. Again, you saw his handsome face and smiled. What a pretty smile. Your teeth aren’t perfect but still white, fitting for your lips.

James was surprised to hear your voice come through the speakers of his laptop: “James! There you are.”

He turned on his mic, “You’re stunning.” He stuttered more than he wanted to admit.

When you smiled this time, your tongue rests between your teeth, “Thank you!” You leaned forward and bit your lip, “Do you want to have fun?” He nodded mindlessly, unaware of his card that was being charged by the minute. “Can I see your cock, James?” Although he lived alone for now seven years, he looked around the room space, “Are you with company?”

He shook his head, palming himself through his jeans. “I- I live alone.”

“I live alone too. What would you do if you were here?”

He exhaled a trembling breath, “I- I’d take that off of you.” James stared at the frills of the lingerie. You undid the top of your lingerie dress and let it fall open. He pulled his hard cock from his jeans at the sight of your perky tits and hard nipples. “T- take it all off.” He stroked himself as you undressed, small moans escaping as you revealed yourself to him.

Day after day, paycheck after the next, he’d completely fallen for you. Eventually, you felt terrible for taking his money and decided to text/call him through your socials.

It was one night as he lay on his side, he asked: “What’s your name?” You sat up across the barrier of the screen and touched your lips nervously. “I promise, I won’t do anything bad…I just want to know.”

“…Y/n.” He smiled at your vulnerability and soon, you smirked with him.

It’s now October and the turning leaves began to gather in piles in front yards and along streets. You trusted him enough with your number, not only that, but he also made you his “girlfriend.” He called you on the way back from the corner store; a bag in his left hand and the phone pressed to his ear. “…I love you.” You said softly. He blushed, a pip in his step from the lovey feeling. This honeymoon-stage never ended. He’s fully and deeply in love with every aspect of you.

Present

Your legs trembled as you sat in the back of the Uber, holding your knees, you took deep breaths. The car stopped and you held your breath, staring at the man that walked around the car and opened the trunk. You stepped out, your eyes wide like a deer in headlights as James grabbed your suitcase and placed it on the sidewalk.

The car pulled away and you stood in front of him. “Hi.” He raised a hand to your cheek and placed a gentle kiss on your forehead. “Let’s go inside.” You agreed quietly and he took your hand into his, “I, uh, know you like Italian so I made reservations for tonight…only if you’re hungry.” You looked around the space as he admired you in your pink tracksuit.

“We can stay in…” You shrugged and held your hands behind your butt. “If that’s ok?”

He scratched the back of his head and held his neck, “S- sure! Yes.” The man followed you as you took your own tour of his home, touching his belongings, opening drawers and smiling all the while.

“Who’s this?” You moved out the way of the photos on the media center.

“That’s my brother.” He said gruffly and walked past you towards the kitchen. “Do you want a drink? Water, or uh, tea? I bought lavender because it’s your favorite.” When he turned around, you were right behind him. “Oh! H, hi.”

“Hi…may I admit something?” You asked, your eyes ran up his tatted forearms

“Yes.” He held the counter that you backed him into.

“I did a background check on you.” He gulped and took a deep breath, “Can I know what you did to receive the charge? Aggravated assault with a deadly weapon?” He stuttered for a moment, “I just…want to be safe.”

“You are safe! I would never hurt you, Y/n. I hope you know that.”

“I know you wouldn’t.” You smiled, your hand rubbed his forearm and down to his hand. James’ fingers interlaced with yours, “Tell me.”

“Uhm, I went to prison a few years ago for robbing a bank. I didn’t mean to hurt anyone, I swear but the gun went off and this lady got hurt.” This wasn’t your first time dealing with an ex-con, but this was James. He’s nothing like them. “Do you want water?”

“Sure.” He quickly turned and poured you a glass of cold water before offering it to you. “It’s very clean in here.”

Yes! “I just tidied up some.” He shrugged.

“Right…” You chuckled, “Can I use your bathroom?” You’d never say it now, but you were sweating like never before beneath this top. He directed you to the bathroom and rest against the wall, his arms crossed as he began to overthink. Does she like the place? She seems hesitant. Well, I’m still a stranger. I hope she doesn’t think I’m trying to kill her! Shit, she’ll leave when I fall asleep. Damn. I can’t fall asleep or----

You left the bathroom and held your jacket over your arm. You were surprised to see him directly outside of the door, but you knew him as a clingy guy. He nodded and followed you into the living room. “Can I see your car?” The car he'd mentioned a million times by now.

“My car? Yeah!” He excitedly grabbed his keys, and you followed him. He unlocked the doors; however, you excitedly circled the car, careful with the black paintjob. “You like it?” You nodded and watched as he popped the hood. “I put in a turbocharger.”

“Isn’t that illegal?” He placed a finger over your lips, and you smiled. “I won’t tell.”

“Get in.” Without a second thought, you climbed into the passenger side. When James joined you, your hand rested on his thigh. “How about Hyde Park and back?” You agreed and heard the roar of his engine. He pulled away from the curb and peeled off down the street.

You rest your hand on the dashboard, feeling the soft rumble of the well-built engine. “…that’s sweet.” James blushes and holds the steering wheel with one hand.

“Thank you, Princess.” Your forearms rests on the window as you leaned out, allowing the wind to blow through the bundles of hair, pushing and tossing each strand around. “Are you comfortable?”

“I am.” After a minute of your shy admiration of his features, you began to undo his belt buckle. James’ expression clashed with surprise and confusion, “Is this ok?” He nodded as your hand found its way into his boxers. His legs naturally spread to your touch while he glanced between the road and your large, brown eyes. The man’s nerves spiked as your ran your tongue over his soft cockhead, the firm shaft in your small hand.

It'd been years since he felt the touch, the feel of a woman. But, never had he been with someone as beautiful as you. You pumped his shaft while slobbering over his cock; your fingertips carried the warm saliva down. “Fuck…” He moaned under his breath, his foot pressed on the brake as the car approached a red light. When he reached for your window’s switch, you bought his hand to your ass. “…Y/n.” He squeezed your butt firmly as he drove, ignoring passersby.

Your head bobbed on James’ cock, and he brought your head lower on his length. “Just like that. Shit, your throat is amazing.” James grunted as he tried to focus on the road. He took a sharp right turn at the avenue and rocked you to the side. “’M sorry!” You kept sucking his cock, seemingly harder than before. “A- alright, baby~ you’re such a good girl.” He sighed, doing his best to park along an empty street. His eyelids fluttered close as your cock buried in your soft throat. You were amused by the sounds that came from his mouth. He might bust right in your throat at this rate---

You stopped sucking and stroked his length at a tormentingly slow rate. You moved against him, your lips on his ear; suckling and pecking on the skin with your plump lips. “Fucking hell…” His hips thrust to your firm pumps around his shaft; a hand grabbed your hair, his fingers in between the tangles as you terrorized his body with these heavenly sensations. He guided your head lower and you continued to suckle kisses down his abdomen and back to his cock. “Sweetheart.”

You choked and sputtered as he gave you his full length, the thick head hit the back of your throat while tears streamed down your cheeks and onto his jeans. “Oh, baby~” His breath shook as your throat closed around him; your tongue swirled around his base. He panted; his head rested back while his hips jerked. You sucked him with renewed energy, your mascara running with every bob on your hair. He gathered the falling strands in his hand and used it to move your head. “I…I’m gonna cum.” James’ words trailed off into a moan. You felt his cock throb and pulse in your mouth.

He emptied himself into your throat, keeping your head down as the come spilled out of your mouth and onto his bush of hair. You gagged on his come and he pulled your head up; you coughed and brushed your tears away. He caught his breath and kissed your sweating forehead. She’s a fucking professional.

“Are you ok?” You asked him with a laugh.

“I- mhh.” He watched you swallow the last bits of cum around your mouth. “Yes.” James kissed your knuckles, “Let’s go home.”

“And do what?” Your finger poked your cheek.

James loomed over your body; his hand caught under your panties; fingers spread open as he rubbed your hip. Your skin is soft beyond belief against his toughened hands. He licked your neck with the flat of his tongue while the cross pendant around his neck pressed on your breasts. With ease, you wrapped your legs around him, your hands sunk into his hair, curling the short locks around your forefinger.

He took a moment to lay between your raised knees, his head on your welcoming bosom. The scent of you was exactly how he imagined: a creamy coconut, some lavender mixed in, bergamot. He didn’t know all that, but he could say that you smelled heavenly.

For a moment, he peered up at you with curious blue eyes through long eyelashes. Your finger ran over his soft cheekbones and his eyes shut under your touch. She’s real. His arms tightened around your bare waist, and he kissed your nipples, taking his time with either one. He rose up once more and captured your bottom lip into his mouth. His tongue pushed past your lips, deep into your mouth.

How was it that you looked at him with such love? He felt like he was violating some sacred boundary when he touched you. Although you’re no saint, without a doubt, you’re an angel. And him? Far from either.

His hand on your waist was gentle as it pulled your panties down and off. You enjoyed the pressure of his weight when he laid on you; he’s like a security blanket of sorts; you clung to him as he found your lips again.

A moan left James’s mouth while his fingers traced the folds of your pussy. He couldn’t help it, your little pussy fit right in his hand. James took a moment to admire the glistening pussy in his hand, already slick with need. His cock throbbed painfully against the confines of his shorts; his sensitive cockhead tortured itself in his boxers.

He pulled his cock from his boxers and let it rest over your warm pussy. James groaned and wrapped his arms around you, his lips on the center of your chest. He peered up at you and with a tender thrust, he filled the walls of your cunt. “Nghh~ P- princess!” James grumbled and let out a deep sigh. Your silky walls were gripping his length like a chokehold; James savored the moments he rests inside of you…each exhale on your breasts. Your hands trembled when he spreads your sensitive core wide.

Lust consumed your boyfriend as he began to move his hips; the force of his thrusts jostling the bed. His body grinds deliciously against your aching clit. Your pussy clutched him harder around his plundering shaft, wanting to draw him in deeper.

James hoisted your legs over his elbows and pressed your back to his headboard, your ankles rest over his broad shoulders. He breathes harshly out his mouth; “You’re so tight~” You hold his reddened neck in your hands, choking him as he drilled into your pussy.

“I know, baby~” His eyelids flutter closed from your grip. The pleasure sent straight to his shaft and heavy balls.

“Fuck!” His shaft fucked your suckling cervix, and your head fell back with the pace change. Your teeth clenched as your chest sunk with each deep exhale. His sweaty forehead pressed against yours as your bodies grind against each other. James’s hands gripped your hips tightly, you felt as if the skin would bruise from his hold. “…I can feel you cumming.” You licked your lips when he said that your orgasm mixed with his precum as he drilled into you.

His swollen cockhead pushed through your cunt; each stretch left you moaning with need. You gripped his throat tighter, your expression devolved into a helpless and needy look. But James couldn’t stop, not when you felt like this.

He turned you over on the bed, so you lay on your back in the mess of sheets. He captured one of your stiff nipples between his lips; a hand pushed one of your legs back beside your head. He licked the sensitive tit and kept it in his mouth while you cried out, your hands clung tightly to the covers.

James could feel his orgasm build in his crotch, the feeling stirred and mixed deep in his balls. He fought to hold back and drew his cock from your perfect heat. His swollen cockhead grinds against your hard clitoris. “A- ahh!” You screamed while your legs shook with pleasure. His cockhead finds the center of your clitoris and makes your head push back into the sheets; every muscle tensed beneath him.

“Cum for me, princess.” He grinds harder and leans over your spasming body. He kissed your trembling lips, “I know, baby.” He cooed and moved strands of hair from your face, his palm rests on your temple. He inhaled every harsh breath you let out and chuckled. “Let me hear you…”

Each torturous stroke made your eyes roll back. You couldn’t move, let alone speak. “You’re right there, aren’t you?” He kissed your lips and thrusts himself back inside of you. Your orgasm shot through your spine down to your core and across the sensitive nerves of your cunt. Your jaw slackened as your body came undone. “Good job~” He buried himself deeper inside of your spasming cunt, emptying himself against your pursed cervix.

a/n: this was a long one for me lol

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