#james is the transition from dark to light

[deathnguts]

I love how in character Jegulus is James ‘fixing’ Regulus and in character Bartylus is Regulus fucking ruining Barty

[nasa]

5 Years, 8 Discoveries: NASA Exoplanet Explorer Sees Dancing Stars & a Star-Shredding Black Hole

This all-sky mosaic was constructed from 912 Transiting Exoplanet Survey Satellite (TESS) images. Prominent features include the Milky Way, a glowing arc that represents the bright central plane of our galaxy, and the Large and Small Magellanic Clouds – satellite galaxies of our own located, respectively, 160,000 and 200,000 light-years away. In the northern sky, look for the small, oblong shape of the Andromeda galaxy (M 31), the closest big spiral galaxy, located 2.5 million light-years away. The black regions are areas of sky that TESS didn’t image. Credit: NASA/MIT/TESS and Ethan Kruse (University of Maryland College Park)

On April 18, 2018, we launched the Transiting Exoplanet Survey Satellite, better known as TESS. It was designed to search for planets beyond our solar system – exoplanets – and to discover worlds for our James Webb Space Telescope, which launched three years later, to further explore. TESS images sections of sky, one hemisphere at a time. When we put all the images together, we get a great look at Earth’s sky!

In its five years in space, TESS has discovered 326 planets and more than 4,300 planet candidates. Along the way, the spacecraft has observed a plethora of other objects in space, including watching as a black hole devoured a star and seeing six stars dancing in space. Here are some notable results from TESS so far:

During its first five years in space, our Transiting Exoplanet Survey Satellite has discovered exoplanets and identified worlds that can be further explored by the James Webb Space Telescope. Credit: NASA/JPL-Caltech

1. TESS’ first discovery was a world called Pi Mensae c. It orbits the star Pi Mensae, about 60 light-years away from Earth and visible to the unaided eye in the Southern Hemisphere. This discovery kicked off NASA's new era of planet hunting.

2. Studying planets often helps us learn about stars too! Data from TESS & Spitzer helped scientists detect a planet around the young, flaring star AU Mic, providing a unique way to study how planets form, evolve, and interact with active stars.

Located less than 32 light-years from Earth, AU Microscopii is among the youngest planetary systems ever observed by astronomers, and its star throws vicious temper tantrums. This devilish young system holds planet AU Mic b captive inside a looming disk of ghostly dust and ceaselessly torments it with deadly blasts of X-rays and other radiation, thwarting any chance of life… as we know it! Beware! There is no escaping the stellar fury of this system. The monstrous flares of AU Mic will have you begging for eternal darkness. Credit: NASA/JPL-Caltech

3. In addition to finding exoplanets on its own, TESS serves as a pathfinder for the James Webb Space Telescope. TESS discovered the rocky world LHS 3844 b, but Webb will tell us more about its composition. Our telescopes, much like our scientists, work together.

4. Though TESS may be a planet-hunter, it also helps us study black holes! In 2019, TESS saw a ‘‘tidal disruption event,’’ otherwise known as a black hole shredding a star.

When a star strays too close to a black hole, intense tides break it apart into a stream of gas. The tail of the stream escapes the system, while the rest of it swings back around, surrounding the black hole with a disk of debris. Credit: NASA's Goddard Space Flight Center

5. In 2020, TESS discovered its first Earth-size world in the habitable zone of its star – the distance from a star at which liquid water could exist on a planet’s surface. Earlier this year, a second rocky planet was discovered in the system.

You can see the exoplanets that orbit the star TOI 700 moving within two marked habitable zones, a conservative habitable zone, and an optimistic habitable zone. Planet d orbits within the conservative habitable zone, while planet e moves within an optimistic habitable zone, the range of distances from a star where liquid surface water could be present at some point in a planet’s history. Credit: NASA Goddard Space Flight Center

6. Astronomers used TESS to find a six-star system where all stars undergo eclipses. Three binary pairs orbit each other, and, in turn, the pairs are engaged in an elaborate gravitational dance in a cosmic ballroom 1,900 light-years away in the constellation Eridanus.

7. Thanks to TESS, we learned that Delta Scuti stars pulse to the beat of their own drummer. Most seem to oscillate randomly, but we now know HD 31901 taps out a beat that merges 55 pulsation patterns.

Sound waves bouncing around inside a star cause it to expand and contract, which results in detectable brightness changes. This animation depicts one type of Delta Scuti pulsation — called a radial mode — that is driven by waves (blue arrows) traveling between the star's core and surface. In reality, a star may pulsate in many different modes, creating complicated patterns that enable scientists to learn about its interior. Credit: NASA’s Goddard Space Flight Center

8. Last is a galaxy that flares like clockwork! With TESS and Swift, astronomers identified the most predictably and frequently flaring active galaxy yet. ASASSN-14ko, which is 570 million light-years away, brightens every 114 days!

Make sure to follow us on Tumblr for your regular dose of space!

[marlsswrites]

Summer camp AU, part 13!!

July 13th <3

Owl - @jegulus-microfic - words: 914

First part Previous part

Letting his eyes glide over the skies, he looked behind him to check the kids were still following along. It was late, the once clear sky started to turn a dark blue. The activity was to go for a night walk, find a nice place in the woods that wasn’t too far from the main camp, and teach the teens how to start a fire.

Much to Regulus’ disappointment, James stood at the back while he stood forward, guiding everyone to the spot that he and James walked to yesterday to check it out. They’d set up some fairy lights, lay down some blankets and packed tools in their bag to start fires.

The distant sound of an owl hooting echoed through his ears, getting louder and softer until it stopped.

He weaved the silver chain strung his dark coloured jean shorts through his hands, feeling the cold metal brush against his hot skin, narrowing his eyes to see the distant glow of fairy lights through the towering trees.

Suddenly, he heard a weight drop into the grass next to him, the heat of a body and a wide smile looking up at him. “Hi!” June grinned ear to ear.

“Hi June.” He spoke in a softer voice than normal. He wasn’t one to play favourites, but June reminded him so much of himself when he was younger, struggling with gender identity in a household like the one he grew up in was definitely a challenge. He would always be so thankful to his friends for helping him transition after he left, leaving was by far the best decision he’s ever made. “How are you?”

They hummed. “Alright…” They trailed off.

“What?” Regulus asked sceptically.

“Oh nothing.” June waved their hands in the air dismissively, leaving a few moments of silence before looking behind at where all the other students walked, and then back at Regulus. “You just kept looking behind yourself, looking really fucking depressed might I add, then sulked off again.” They shrugged.

Regulus felt his eyes widen, a noise of offends escaping his mouth. “Hey! Don’t analyse me.” He retorted. “And I’m not sulking, don’t be nosy.”

“Okay!” They raised their hands in surrender, a smirk still lingering on their lips. “If it helps, James is wearing the exact same expression.”

“What-“

“Bye!” They jogged off with a wave.

“-The fuck.” He finished after they left. “I hate kids.” He grumbled.

-

The lights were glistening, the fire hissing, the owls hooting and James Potters eyes shining. It was beautiful out, and in Regulus’ opinion, James’ face only added to that.

They sat together, legs entangled together far more than they actually needed, ignoring the fact that they had a whole blanket to themselves.

Gladly, the kids had managed to start some small fires, then James gave in and lit a bigger one so everyone could roast their marshmallows.

“Have you ever roasted skittles on a fire?” James spoke out of the blue.

“Excuse me?”

“Have you ever-“

Regulus coughed out a laugh. “No I heard you the first time, James. But of course not.” He rolled his eyes, emphasising his point with a gag.

“It’s actually very nice, Regulus!”

“Abomination.”

-

They carried on like this all night, bickering, laughing, throwing random bits of food and leaves at each other while they waited for the time to pass.

Now, Regulus sat lay on his back while James made sure he could still see the teens. He looked up at the full moon, it was dotted through the leaves of the trees but still quite visible and as bright as ever before.

He rolled his head to the side slightly, catching sight of James’ veined dark hands spread out on the blanket next to him. Every now and again he’d shift, playing with his rings and fiddling with his hands randomly. All Regulus wanted to do right now was place his hand atop the older boys, but he couldn’t just do that.

So he just waited, he wasn’t sure what for, but he did anyway. Maybe for James to look at him, all so he could make a snarky comment because he doesn’t know what else to say, but James seems to weirdly like it, so that works in his favour.

It wasn’t until James turned his head to look directly at Regulus, catching his eye and holding it with his hazel doe irises for a few seconds before reaching that same hand out to him.

The coolness of his fingers combed through Regulus’ hair. It was quick, but soon James grabbed a leaf and held it up with an amused expression on his face.

His tan skin was engulfed with the light of the flames before them, highlighting even the tiniest of details and turning his eyes a whole new colour which Regulus decided was so utterly gorgeous.

James reached another finger out, brushing the loose curl of Regulus’ raven hair behind and tucked into his overly pierced ears. He gave a proud smile, nodding and tossing the leaf on the floor.

“There, that’s better.” He spoke softly, clearly not aware to the awe struck wonder on Regulus face, and the red flush that was certainly not from the heat of the flames. Even the way Regulus froze and watched him smile and hum along to a random song, and James just chuckled.

God, this man was oblivious, because Regulus was sure he was doing a pretty shit job at hiding this.

Next part

[sashaisready]

Chapter Twenty - Of course I did

Bucky Barnes Mob AU x Femme Reader

You're hard at work in Pepper's Bakery when notorious mob boss James 'Bucky' Barnes darkens your doorway one typical afternoon, and life is never the same again.

Warnings: Dark content, mention of guns/shooting, descriptions of dead bodies and blood, threats/suggestions of sexual assault, minor character fatally wounded/dying, reader is frightened/in danger

18+ - see Masterlist for full list of warnings

Chapter 21

Series Masterlist

You’re not sure how much time has passed when you’re awoken by shouting. You must’ve fallen asleep, which makes sense as it’s so late, although you aren’t sure what time it is exactly. You instinctively go to check for your phone but then remember they have it. Your body is exhausted from the stress of all that has happened. You have a headache, the wine from your date has already transitioned into the beginnings of a hangover and you haven’t had any water in hours. The Thai dinner you so enjoyed earlier now feels heavy in your stomach. The gash on your cheek stings sharply, the bleeding has mostly stopped but not entirely. You feel dizzy, losing blood from your wound most likely not helping that.

The sound of yelling again jerks you to attention, the adrenaline coursing through you as your fear unfurls once more. You can’t make out what they’re saying until the door crashes open and bodies rush into the room. You try to count the number of feet you can hear on the floorboards but can’t figure it out. Two of them, you think? Three? They’re shouting out your name, their voices thick with anger. You can’t see them but you know they must have guns raised, searching every square inch for you.

One of them tries the light switch but grunts in frustration when nothing happens. You can hear the snap of plastic as he forces it up and down. Seconds later the room is partially illuminated by flashlights, the circles of light flitting around the room.

You swallow, clasping your hand over your mouth to mask any sounds you might make involuntarily. You stood a good chance in the dark where they couldn’t see you, but once that light hits you…then you’re done for.

“Come on sugar, come out come out wherever you are…” one of them sneers mockingly into the darkness.

You can’t see him but you just know it’s Rumlow.

“I’m gonna ring Jones’ neck for this” snarls another voice.

“Don’t worry, Pierce will take care of him” replies Rumlow darkly.

They chuckle for a moment as they scour the room.

“I’m gonna make this bitch pay when we find her” says the other voice again.

“Let’s just hope she’s not been too used up by Barnes for us to have some fun with her” laughs Rumlow. “I wanna rearrange her guts”.

Your stomach drops and you choke back a wave of nausea as they edge closer to your hiding spot. You’re seconds away from discovery now. Should you leap out? Use the element of surprise against them?

Don’t be stupid. They have guns. They’re infinitely stronger and faster than you. They most likely have combat training based on how they’re dressed. Maybe it would be better to go quickly, though. To be shot in the head and be snuffed out in an instant after you jump out - rather than be slowly tortured and sexually assaulted and God only knows what else.

You think of your family. Your friends. Wanda. Everything you didn’t get a chance to say to them all. All of the love you have for them. You think of the bakery. You think of your contentment as you bake, happily frosting cupcakes and humming to yourself as you sing along to the radio. You’d give anything to be there now. Hell, even baking in your tiny apartment kitchen would be a luxury. You’d never take it for granted again if you made it out alive.

You hold onto that image in your head to help calm you and give you hope, grounding yourself with the memory and keeping yourself sane. One of the flashlights reaches your corner of the room and moves closer to you. Everything goes into slow motion. You hold your breath as the light reaches the edge of your dress...

But then.

A scream cuts through the air. A clear scream. From somewhere beneath you. Rumlow and the other man or maybe men spin round, their flashlights ripping away from where you are and instead turn to face the door.

“What the…” Rumlow starts.

And then there’s another scream which cuts him off, and then the crystal clear roar of gunfire. You tense up. It seems to be coming from the corridors beneath you.

“Jesus Christ” spits out the other man.

In seconds you hear their heavy feet as they stomp out of the door and rush back down the stairs.

You freeze, panting. You can hear more now. There are more bullets, it must be a machine gun the way the sounds are rattling through the air like that. There’s muffled shouting and crying out from below.

It goes on like this for some time, your eyes are wide like saucers as you press your ear to the floorboards. You try to make out something they’re saying. Anything. Any hint as to what’s going on or who is shooting. But it’s all lost in a sea of bullets and yelling.

And then…silence.

Your stomach drops again. You know what that means. There’s nobody left.

Could it be…?

No. Surely not. He said he wasn’t coming. Why would he come? The last thing you said to him was that you were going to give him to the feds.

And if it’s not him, it’s only a matter of time before they find you too. You’re a sitting duck up here. You were lucky enough to get out of it once, but it wouldn’t happen twice.

Against all of your instincts you emerge from your corner and tiptoe across the attic. You’re barely thinking, just on autopilot. You open the door gently, careful not to make any noise. You squint as you leave the darkness and take each stair warily as you descend, listening out for any tell-tale sounds of what’s going on. But there’s only silence.

Your face stings and now you’re back in the light you can see your chest and dress is covered in old blood. You can feel the hardened stain on your cheek too, mixed with the remains of your tears. You’re shrouded in a thick layer dust from your hiding place in the attic, your ripped dress hanging pitifully off you. You can only imagine how you must look.

As you step out into the hallway you gasp. The wall in front of you is decorated with bloodstains. A few feet away a man is slumped onto his front, laying facedown in a pool of his own blood. From the way the blood has hit the wall his insides must be swiss cheese. You deduce that it’s one of the men from the attic. He didn’t get very far.

You’ve never seen a dead body before. It’s frightening. Not like in the movies. He looks almost inhuman with his impossible stillness. Stiller than a person should ever be. You can smell copper in the air from his blood, the stench of sweat and gunpowder lingers in your nose and makes your stomach churn.

You creep around him and swallow back your nausea. Around the next corner you see Rumlow flat on his back. He made it a bit further. His eyes are closed and circles of deep red splatter his torso. You inhale sharply, stepping around him carefully. You notice that his weapon is gone, whoever finished him off must’ve taken it with them.

You nearly scream when you feel a pressure on your ankle as you stalk by. You look down and to your horror Rumlow has his cold fingers gripped around you. He is still alive, but barely. His hand feels like ice. Staring up at you through squinted eyelids, you can see the fear on his face as his lifeforce is gently ebbing away from him. He tries to speak but can only groan, making a nauseating gurgling sound and you realise his internal injuries are taking hold as the light fades from his eyes.

It’s too much. You begin to break into a sprint. All of your fear from the evening comes tumbling out and you can’t stop. You know you should be quiet, carefully inspect what’s around each corner before you come barrelling around them, but all of that dies as the adrenaline courses through you.

As you fling yourself through the hallways you find them littered with more bodies and bloodstains. Puddles of blood are everywhere, stains of grisly footsteps of the retreating victors brazenly weaved around the fallen. There must’ve been even more of them than you saw in the warehouse. You don’t see Pierce amongst them, but then you aren’t really looking too carefully.

There are angry red blemishes splattered across the walls and your bare feet hurt when you step on bullet casings but you can’t stop now. You shimmy around each fallen figure as you aimlessly continue to run, unsure of where you’re going or if you’re turning back on yourself but just knowing that you need to keep going. Keep going. Keep going. Don’t stop.

You don’t know when you started crying but your tears don’t slow you down. You whip around another corner only to find yourself bouncing off something, the force of your speed means the impact is hard and it knocks you onto your back.

You begin to scream as you sit up and realise you’ve hit a person. An alive person, not a body. A man. A man with a gun. And your fear takes over. You can’t even look at him properly as you know this is it now, this is where your luck runs out. End of the line.

There are arms on your shoulders and someone is talking at you but you can’t hear any words, can’t see their face through the haze of your tears. It’s only when they begin to shake you gently when you realise…

Sea blue eyes.

Sea blue eyes looking into yours. You know those eyes.

Bucky.

You gasp as his features finally become clear in your vision. You can see his lips moving but can’t hear what he’s saying as you stare up at him. You reach out and clutch at his chest as if checking it’s really him and he’s really there. His face is contorted in concern and there’s a worrying amount of blood on his shirt. Not his, though. You can guess that. Suddenly it’s like your ears are switched back on and you can hear him again.

“Doll? Doll? Are you alright? Say something, baby?” His voice is panicked, strained with fear as he places his assault rifle onto the ground. You eye it anxiously.

“Bucky?” you ask weakly. 

Maybe you’re hallucinating, maybe you were shot seconds ago and this is your brain’s confused final flourish as you succumb to the darkness.

“Is it really you?”

His concern morphs into a relieved smile and you melt inside.

“Yeah it’s me, Doll. I’ve got you, don’t worry” he soothes.

You hurl yourself at him, clutching at his torso and throwing your arms around his back as you move your head into the crook of his neck. Squeezing him tightly with relief, pawing at him to check he’s really there. He picks up your legs and you wrap them around his waist, clinging onto him for dear life.

“You came” you whisper into his ear.

“Of course I did” he says matter of factly. “Where have you been Doll? We’ve been looking everywhere for you. Have to say I laughed when they told me you’d got loose and they’d lost you somewhere. Those assholes didn’t know who they were dealing with, huh?”

You ignore his question, gazing back at him with confusion.

“But…you said you weren’t coming? In the text?”

Bucky chuckles, his tone soft as he searches your face.

“I knew immediately those messages weren’t you. You know how mushy those fucks made you sound? I knew it was HYDRA and sent a bunch of my guys here with me to get you out. I just wanted to throw Pierce off the scent to buy us time.”

You gawped at him stupidly.

“You really think I’d leave you here, Doll?” He furrowed his brow, studying you.

“Well…yeah. We had that fight. You said…” you muttered.

Bucky narrows his eyes. “I would never leave you to die, Doll. No matter what happened between us”.

He looks at you with a flash of anger and hurt amongst the relief, clearly wounded that you’d think so little of him.

He lowers you off of him and carefully places you on the ground. “Can you stand?”

You nod, steadying yourself on the wall as your feet hit the floor. Bucky keeps a hand firmly on your waist as he inspects your face. You flinch as his finger brushes against your cheek wound. He huffs with rage.

“Those fuckers. Those stupid assholes” he mumbles furiously.

“It was…” you go to tell him about the nail in the attic but he cuts you off.

“They’re never going to hurt you again, alright? I’m so sorry Doll. I’m so sorry this happened, it’s all my fault” his voice sounds small, broken. He cups your chin tenderly. “I’m sorry that I didn’t protect you…”

Your eyes widen as you realise the gravity of his words when they hit you and a rush of emotion surges within.

He was right.

Before you know what’s happening, you reach out and slap his face. He glares back at you in confusion, touching his cheek where you struck him. You can’t stop yourself, pummelling his chests with your fists as you unravel, all of the stress, fear and anger pouring out of you like an unstoppable tidal wave.

He catches your wrists and holds them tightly in place, you howl with frustration at how powerless you feel.

“This IS your fault James” you bark at him. “How the fuck am I caught up in your turf wars?? We aren’t even DATING. I get wrestled into the back of a van and hauled off to some warehouse in the middle of nowhere with some psychopathic gang…tied up and hunted down…and then there’s a fuckin’ massacre…”

You trail off when you notice he’s smiling wistfully at you.

“What?” you scoff in disbelief. “How can you possibly be smiling right now?”

“I’m just happy you’re okay” he says softly. “You can yell at me all you want, hit me all you like, because for a while there I wasn’t sure you’d ever be able to yell at me again”.

You’re caught off guard by that. You hadn’t even thought about how he might’ve felt through this. You feel a twinge in your heart. He was scared. He thought you were dead. You stare into his big blue eyes and your mouth falls open slightly at the intensity of his scrutiny.

Before you know it you’re on him, kissing him for the second time that evening (maybe morning now?) The kiss is desperate and passionate, eager and hungry. He presses you up against the wall and you can feel him panting, his hands are all over you as if doing an audit of your body. It’s as if he’s affirming that all of you is still here. He kisses your neck, your shoulders, your arms. You momentarily forget that you’re covered in your own blood, or that he’s covered in the blood of men he gunned down.

He pulls away and begins to whisper in your ear. He tells you he’s sorry, for this, for all of it. He tells you he’ll never let anything like this happen to you again. He tells you how brave you are, how smart you were to get away. You allow yourself to get swept away by his words, soothing you and comforting you, your eyes closed as your arms are draped around his neck.

“Buck, you here?” comes a voice from around the corner.

Your body tenses as your survival instincts are still heightened but Bucky kisses your cheek after feeling your posture shift. “Don’t worry, it’s just Steve” he whispers soothingly.

“We’re here” he calls back.

Steve emerges from around the corner. He’s sweaty and blood spattered like Bucky, clutching a rifle. His face lightens when he sees you.

“Hey - there you are” he says sunnily.

You smile back at him. A genuine smile, possibly the first one you’d ever given him.

“Here I am”.

He looks you up and down, struck by the contrast to how you looked when he saw you earlier. Then…pretty in your date outfit and heels, hair and make-up slightly askew after a few glasses of wine but still intact. Your eyes fiery and passionate as you gave Bucky a dressing down. And now…your face was bloodied, some sort of injury across your cheek. Your dress ripped and blood soaked, a layer of dust dirtying your arms. You were barefoot. Your mascara had run down your face in thick black streaks and your hair was knotted and tangled. Mainly he was struck by your eyes, now dulled and frightened. No sign of the heat he had seen earlier. You just clung on to Bucky’s side meekly.

But you were alright, that was the main thing, and he was relieved. You may be Bucky’s girl but he had grown fond of you too. He thought you were good for his best friend, challenging him and keeping him on his toes. Buck needed that in his life. A partner to be his equal, not merely a sex toy.

He was also relieved for Bucky’s sake. He had gone wild when he got the messages, throwing his whiskey glass across the room and yelling. They were just leaving for the night, he’d run to him and didn’t understand what had happened. Bucky was apoplectic, shouting and throwing furniture. He knew you’d been taken, he knew it was Pierce. He ordered them to round up as many men as they could, emptying out the weapons storage as they followed the location pin. They’d even called in a favour with Stark who was more than happy to lend a hand after learning that Pepper’s star baker was in danger - sending over reinforcements and a few extra top of the line rifles.

The car ride was quick as they sped, but Bucky was silent throughout, his eyes focused out on the road. The only sign he was tense were his hands, clenched into tight fists at his sides.

“She’ll be alright. We’ll get her out, Buck” Steve had told him.

Bucky just smiled thinly and nodded, the worry etched over his face. He had turned back to look out at the road again…

“Perimeter is clear, Buck” Steve explained.

Bucky nodded “Thanks Steve”. He stepped forward to leave and you gripped him harder. He turned back and took your hand.

“C’mon Doll, let’s go home” he beckoned, guiding you through the halls.

[ginnsbaker]

brooklyn

Summary: One night in Brooklyn, with all the twists and turns in your histories, you, Wanda, Kate, and Yelena end up at the same table.

Word count: 3.2K+ | A/N: This is for all of my ILGOSS readers. Requested by anon:

Would you ever be up to writing in the ilgoss universe the first time after everything that happened that Yelena Kate Wanda and reader interact? Like after reader and Wanda getting officially back together

Also, if you can't tell, I've recently been obsessing about degustation menus.

Masterlist

-

A gilded Brooklyn evening envelops you. It further transforms elegantly as the sun dips below the horizon. Around you, the silhouettes of trees stretch and bend, their leaves rustling gently in the evening breeze. It's in one of these timeless structures that Wanda has woven her dreams, with her restaurant, Hasta Feliz. 

After spending a year in the heart of Catalonia, Wanda meticulously planned to work towards that dream, especially given the possibility that realizing her other dream—you—might never be possible again. You've always admired Wanda’s tenacity, the way she harnessed her experiences—both good and bad—into passion. It was a trait you fell in love with and, ultimately, the reason you found your way back to her, despite being more than a year late in doing so.

The restaurant's door, ornate with wrought iron designs, pushes open with a gentle nudge. The hostess greets you warmly, addressing you by your name. She leads you to the kitchen table, which offers a prime view of the open kitchen where all the magic happens. At the center of the action is your wife, dressed in full chef's gear, sampling dishes being prepared by her kitchen staff. 

You rest your chin on the heel of your hand, a subtle smile playing on your lips, contentedly watching her perform like an artist. Wanda began as an art student at NYU, and while her current career might deviate somewhat from the degree she earned, you believe it's only natural for Wanda to have found another avenue to express her creativity.

Wanda moves gracefully around her stage, a look of unyielding concentration etched on her face. Her commanding presence is undeniably alluring, both authoritative and captivating in a manner that, even after all these years, never fails to draw you in. Dark, intent eyes scan over her dominion, ensuring each plate is a masterpiece before it's allowed to exit her kitchen.

Her commanding presence fills the room, drawing all eyes to her. To you, this side of her is intensely attractive, and as you sit there, you find yourself wondering if others perceive her the same way. Glancing down at the wedding band you wear on your finger, a possessive instinct tugs at you. The idea of someone else being equally entranced by your wife makes you slightly uneasy. But an even stronger feeling is the perpetual awe that she is yours.

She occasionally glances up, catching staff members' eyes, and with just a look or a small nod, redirects their actions. It's mesmerizing how she manages to communicate so much without words, and you marvel at her ability to lead so effortlessly.

You're jerked from your reverie when she looks in your direction. Her eyes light up as she spots you, and for a moment, the chaos and noise fades into the background. It's just the two of you in that instance. She sends you a discreet wink before returning to her duties, bringing a light blush to your cheeks. James, the restaurant’s sommelier, promptly pours you a glass of wine and serves you a small charcuterie board to accompany it. You thank him with a smile and quickly indulge in a 1998 Rioja, the aged liquid burning down your throat before spreading a comforting warmth through your chest. 

It’s a full house tonight, save for the table near the window you've reserved for your friend, Kate Bishop. She has transitioned from being a journalist to a food and lifestyle contributor for many renowned magazines. Wanda's restaurant has only been open for two months, but with Kate set to cover their 10-course tasting, you're hopeful all of New York will be talking about it soon.

“You’re early.”

Temporarily handing over the kitchen's control to her sous chef, Wanda takes a seat beside you and sneaks a bit of brie from your board. You swivel your chair to face her, already wearing an alcohol-induced cheeky grin. “I've missed you all day.”

Wanda beams and leans in to plant a chaste kiss on your cheek. But before she can pull away, you gently cup the back of her neck, stealing a more proper kiss from her lips. Wanda blushes, glancing around to see if any of the staff witnessed the exchange, and you can't help but suppress a chuckle at her reaction. In retaliation, Wanda seizes your glass of wine, taking a lengthy swig that nearly empties its contents, then wipes traces of it from the edge of her mouth. A smirk plays on your wife’s lips, and you exert every ounce of restraint to keep from wiping that smirk away yourself.

“Nervous?” you ask, your hand rising to massage the knots on Wanda’s shoulders. With your other hand, you signal James for a refill.

“A little,” Wanda confesses. She was over the moon when she learned of Kate's intention to review her restaurant. Only once before has a food critic penned thoughts on her new restaurant—it was a piece in a lesser-known tabloid that awarded her a 3.5 out of 5 stars. Despite reassurances that it's a respectable score for a newcomer, Wanda couldn't help but fixate on it. Now, she's on a quest to earn that perfect rating.

“Relax, you’re going to do great,” you say. “I think it helps that Kate loves Spanish cuisine.”

“That’s the thing, there’s more pressure serving someone who’s quite taken and familiar with the food.”

Suddenly, a flurry of anxious voices emanate from the open kitchen. While there's no dramatic crash, you notice two of Wanda’s chefs exchanging nervous glances, hands slightly trembling, as they try to discreetly deal with a small mishap away from the customers' prying eyes.

Wanda's sharp eyes catch the nervous interaction. Without hesitation, she's on her feet and swiftly approaching the two chefs. She glances your way briefly, a hint of frustration in her eyes. “Sorry,” she mouths to you as she delves into the matter.

You pull out your phone to distract yourself for a while, and notice a message from Kate timestamped five minutes ago. She says she's close and that she's bringing a plus one. Your brows knit together; the reservation was for two, intended for you and her. Adjusting your plans on the fly, you realize you might have to have your dinner elsewhere tonight. It's fortunate that your wife operates a restaurant; you're almost certain there are set-aside orders in the back you can indulge in.

You’re still typing up a reply to Kate when the delicate chime of the entrance bell lifts your eyes. Kate steps in, wearing a suit for the occasion. Beside her stands Yelena, looking slightly out of place in her edgier, more casual attire. As soon as they catch sight of you, you offer a small wave in greeting.

“Hey,” Kate starts, taking in the scene before her, especially the ongoing, discreet chaos in the kitchen. “Seems like a busy night.”

“It sure is. And Yelena, what a surprise.”

Yelena chuckles, “Got wind of dinner at a posh place. Thought I'd tag along.”

You turn to Kate with a restrained smile. “You did mention to her that this is, well, Wanda's place, right?”

It’s Yelena, however, who answers, “She did. I'm truly eager for dinner tonight.”

“Good. That’s... good,” you reply, feeling slightly off-kilter.

Kate shoots you a teasing grin. “Oh, don’t wear your nerves on your sleeve, Y/N,” she chides gently. “After all, you’re not the one preparing our meal, right?”

A laugh escapes you, and you dismissively shake your head at her playful jab. “Your table’s right over there. I’ll join you in just a moment.”

You hurry back to the kitchen. Wanda is right in the thick of it, her brow furrowed in concentration as she meticulously adjusts a plate, ensuring that each element is perfectly placed.

You edge gently into her line of sight, attempting to get her attention. “Wanda.”

She remains unmoved, as if the world has fallen away from her.

You inhale, hesitating for a brief moment before uttering the one thing that you know will seize her attention. “Yelena. She’s here.”

Her head snaps up, “What?!” Wanda exclaims, her hands momentarily stilling.

You explain quickly, “Kate brought Yelena along tonight. She's seated with her, waiting for dinner.”

Wanda’s eyes go wide—a little too wide—that under any different occasion you’d find funny and would tease her endlessly for it. But the present moment treads a delicate line between a comical irony and a grave reunion of sorts; the memory still lingers that you cheated on Yelena with Wanda, and initially, you were with Yelena because the latter had cheated on you. 

While you trust Yelena not to let personal bias sway her judgment, it's clear why your wife is teetering on the edge of panic.

“S-Should I cancel?” Wanda asks.

“No, no, no,” you say quickly. “Baby, you can do this.”

Wanda bites her lower lip, a nervous habit you’ve come to recognize over the years. “Okay, let’s think this through. Yelena is professional. She won't let past grievances affect her review. And the food... it’s top-notch. They’ll love it,” she tries to reassure herself more than you.

“They will,” you assure her, nodding. “What can I do to help?”

“Could you keep them entertained and assist me in presenting the dishes?”

“Absolutely.”

Wanda looks a bit on edge, but she gives you a grateful smile and plants a quick kiss on your lips. “Thanks for everything.”

“Anytime.”

-

The 10-course meal Wanda whipped up kicks off with an appetizer that makes your mouth water. You walk with her as she serves it to Yelena and Kate. She's ditched her chef's hat tonight, and you can see those little wild hairs on her forehead with her hair all tied up into a strict bun.

The gazpacho sits elegantly on the table, vibrant and almost begging for a photo. Wanda, poised and with a touch of flair, presents it: “This is not just any gazpacho. It's the essence of summer, distilled into a plate. Tomatoes basking in sunshine, cucumber with a hint of earth, and a watermelon gel that adds an unexpected twist.”

She suggests the, “For those wanting a fuller experience, there's the Albariño from Rías Baixas. It's crisp, coastal, and James will bring it to you.”

“It's beautiful,” Kate comments, digging in, while Yelena gives Wanda a faint smile. Wanda clears her throat, feeling the intensity of your ex-girlfriend's gaze, while you watch her, seeing up close for the first time how she introduces her dishes.

Wanda gives your waist a sly pinch, pulling you out of your daze.

“Ow!”

With a poised smile, Wanda says, “Enjoy your meal,” then heads to the kitchen. You're about to trail after her when Yelena gets your attention.

“Y/N,” Yelena says. “Sit with us.”

After a moment's hesitation, you find a chair, drawing it up to the table to sit between the two. James arrives with two glasses of wine, and you request a third glass for yourself.

“I didn’t know you were in town,” you venture, trying to ease into casual conversation.

“Just for three weeks,” Yelena responds, taking a sip of her wine. “I’m on assignment.”

“I hope the long-distance thing is treating you both well,” you say.

Kate sighs dramatically, “It’s a challenge, but we make do. Frequent flyer miles, late-night calls, the usual.”

Yelena adds, “And surprises. Like tonight.”

You fidget slightly, hoping to navigate the conversation away from the potential landmines of the past. But Yelena catches your unease. “You seem... tense.”

“Can you blame me?” You try to deflect, glaring at Kate for the last-minute heads up.

Yelena chuckles, that hearty laugh you remember so well. “Relax, Y/N. I don’t pull any strings with Kate's reviews. But between you and me,” she leans in slightly, “that appetizer? It's a 5 out of 5 in my book.”

Your smile relaxes. Maybe the evening won't be so treacherous after all.

Just in time, Wanda returns with the second appetizer for the night.

-

It takes about two and a half hours for the pair to work their way through the entire tasting menu. By the end, Kate has undone the button on her trousers, while Yelena, full and drowsy from the meal, struggles to keep her eyes open.

“Where's Wanda?” Kate asks, returning the bill with her credit card to the waiter.

“I'll go find her,” you say, rising from your seat.

You head toward the open kitchen but don't find your wife. After asking a few staff members, they direct you to the staff room. There, you find Wanda sitting on a bench, about to open the tupperware of food you prepared for her earlier.

“Hey,” you greet as you approach. She's shed her uniform and is now dressed in the same clothes she wore when she left the apartment this morning. Her tired eyes brighten up slightly at the sight of you. She grins at you, masking the exhaustion you’ve grown so attuned to recognizing.

“You did amazing out there,” you start, thumbing the faint shadows beneath her eyes. “Kate looked genuinely impressed. I've never seen her react that way before.”

Wanda tilts her head, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear. “Thanks, baby. But, I noticed them looking around after dinner, were they looking for me?”

You nod, “They did want to talk to you, yes.”

Her face pales slightly. “Is that a good idea? With Yelena… after everything?”

“Yelena and I have talked about…well, us—and that includes you—several times in the past. She doesn't hold any grudges against you, I promise.”

Wanda sighs, toying with the edges of the tupperware. “I just don't want to make things awkward for you or for her.”

You draw her closer, brushing a kiss on her temple. “It’s in the past, Wands. We’ve moved on, and so has she.”

She smiles, leaning into your embrace. “Okay.”

As you both stand up to make your way back to Kate and Yelena's table, you suddenly notice the tupperware still clutched in Wanda’s hand. You pause, an incredulous look on your face. “Wait, you're actually going to eat that?”

She looks down at the container and then back at you with feigned innocence. “What? I'm hungry.”

“That?” you say, pointing to the tupperware. “With all the culinary masterpieces you've been churning out tonight, you're going to eat... whatever that is I threw together this morning?”

Wanda narrows her eyes, trying to suppress a grin. “Don't you dare insult my favorite meal, especially when it’s made by my favorite person.”

You shake your head, your cheeks warming up. Even after all these years, it's amazing how Wanda can still make you blush like a smitten teenager. “You're nuts for preferring anything I whip up in the kitchen. It's like a five-year-old's attempt compared to your gourmet dishes.”

She pokes your chest playfully, “Maybe you put a hex on me, you know, making me helplessly fall in love with you.”

It's so cheesy that you burst into laughter, draping an arm around her. “Yeah, maybe I did.”

Wanda giggles, resting her head against your shoulder briefly before you both continue toward the awaiting table.

-

“She did not do that!”

“She actually did!”

Yelena is grinning from ear to ear, her eyes darting between you and Wanda. You groan, sinking lower in your seat, a slight blush creeping onto your cheeks.

Wanda nods enthusiastically, her laughter causing a few stray curls to fall into her eyes. “She did! Y/N, trying to cook a romantic dinner for me and setting off the smoke alarm. Not only did our apartment's alarm go off, but it triggered the entire building's system.”

Yelena wipes a tear from her eye, trying to suppress her own laughter. “And having the entire building evacuate? Oh, that’s just golden.”

You hide your face in your hands, “It was our anniversary date! I wanted it to be special.”

“And it certainly was,” Wanda adds with a smirk.

Feigning offense, you reach across the table to try and snatch the tupperware filled with the meal you'd made for Wanda. “Alright, if my culinary skills are such a laughing matter, perhaps you shouldn't enjoy my latest creation.”

Wanda holds onto it defensively, pulling it close with a teasing grin. “Not happening. Despite that incident, this is still my favorite dish.”

“I wouldn't have thought Y/N to be the clumsy type. Next to her, I'm a complete klutz,” Yelena remarks.

“Can't argue with that,” Kate adds, receiving a playful swat from Yelena.

“I did have burnt toast for breakfast for a while,” you say with a smirk, alluding to the brief time you had with Yelena. It feels unreal, discussing the past so openly and without that familiar twinge in your chest.

Suddenly, Kate clinks her glass, drawing attention to herself with a burgeoning smile. “Well, speaking of choosing who gets to make our burnt toast in the morning,” she begins, beaming at Yelena, “I asked this one to marry me.”

“Congratulations!” Wanda exclaims, and you mirror her sentiment with a broad smile.

Yelena simply smiles, her usually fierce demeanor softened, eyes glistening with joy. She holds up her hand, showing off a beautiful, but temporary, band.

“I found out before she could surprise me with the custom ring,” Yelena mumbles, looking visibly smitten. “So she panicked and proposed with this.”

Kate shrugs, a little embarrassed. “It’s a placeholder until the real one is ready. Still, the sentiment remains.”

Wanda laughs, nudging you with her elbow. “Speaking of proposals,” she starts. “Remember last year when I popped the question to you?"

You groan for the nth time, hiding your face in your hands. “Not that story.”

“We were by this old swing, and I just... I felt it, you know? That it was the right time. So I got down on one knee, trying to make it special and romantic,” Wanda recalls, rolling her eyes.

“And?” Kate prompts.

“She said 'no'!”

“It wasn't a real no!” you protest, feeling the warmth rise in your cheeks. “I just... I had my own plans, okay? I wanted to be the one to propose.”

Yelena stifles a laugh behind her hand. “That sounds just like you. Always wanting the last word.”

Kate nudges her, “Oh, and you didn’t?”

Yelena feigns innocence, “I just said yes.”

“It all worked out in the end, for all of us, didn't it?” you muse, your eyes flickering between Wanda and the newly engaged couple across the table. Wanda’s fingers intertwine with yours, giving a gentle squeeze. But it's Yelena's slightly misted eyes, softened from their usual guarded sheen, that draws you in. The slight upturn at the corner of her mouth suggests she's pondering the same thought: the richness of your history together didn't always follow the conventional path of strong friendships. Still, you're both grateful for the memories you've created and for Yelena's grace in forgiving past transgressions.

It's a fitting evening to begin a new chapter, and you're hopeful that each subsequent page will be even better.

Yelena nods ever so slightly. “Yeah,” she exhales, her voice a thin whisper over the candlelights, “I suppose it did.”

It's late, and with everyone gone, the four of you are left to close up the restaurant.

With a swirl of your wine and a nod towards the remaining bottle in the ice bucket, you ask the group, “One more for the road?”

[moons-and-mobility-aids]

Secrets Revealed

Pairings: Poly!marauders x disabled!reader Summary: Sometimes it's easier to walk. One problem-your boyfriends don't know you can. [wordcount: 1.9k words] Tags: fem!reader, wheelchair user!reader, emotional comfort, light angst, fluff, mentions of ableism (internalised and externalised) Series Masterlist

The late afternoon sunlight filters into your room, casting a warm, golden hue over everything it touches. You're perched by the window, gazing out at the dwindling light, while James, Sirius, and Remus occupy various corners of your sanctuary.

James is sprawled on your bed, a book open before him. His glasses rest low on his nose, catching the glint of the dying sun as he flips through the pages nonchalantly, his ruffled hair fanning out across the pillow like a dark halo.

Sirius, meanwhile, has claimed the armchair by the fireplace, his long legs draped over one arm, hands clasped behind his head. His eyes are half-closed, the flickering flames reflecting in their depths, and there's a sense of contentment about him that seems almost tangible.

Remus sits at your desk, bent over his Defense Against the Dark Arts textbook, a quill poised between his fingers. Every so often, he makes a note in the margin, his brow furrowed in concentration.

The room is filled with the soft crackle of the fire, the rustle of turning pages, and the shared silence of companionship. This is your haven, and they are your pillars—each one a fixture in the landscape of your life.

Normally, their presence brings a sense of calm, a gentle reprieve from the storm of your thoughts. But tonight, the ache in your legs is louder than usual, the pain echoing through the silence between their words. The prospect of shifting from armchair to wheelchair, from wheelchair to bed, the clumsy dance of limbs and reliance on others, feels more daunting than ever.

Your gaze flickers to the sturdy frame of the bed—a few steps away, yet a chasm wide and deep in reality. And in that moment, you make a decision.

You will walk.

The distance is short. You've traversed it often when left alone with your thoughts and the stubbornness that threads through your veins. Yet each step is a battle, fought against the protests of your body and the remnants of pride clinging to your heart. It's a war you wage in private, away from prying eyes.

Until now.

Without a word, you lean forward, your muscles coiling like springs beneath your skin. Your hands grip the armrests, knuckles white as you push yourself upward. Pain flares up your legs, a stark reminder of the invisible chains that bind you. But you fight it, focusing on the strength in your arms, the determination fuelling each ragged breath.

The transition is slow, agonising. For a moment, you hover between two worlds—seated and standing, dependence and autonomy. Then, with a final surge of effort, you are upright. Your body sways, unsteady but defiant.

James's book falls from his hands, his eyes round with surprise as he surges upright. "What—Y/N, what are you doing?"

Sirius stiffens, the ease in his posture evaporating as he swings his legs off the bed and onto the floor. "Bloody hell, babe, sit down! You don't have to—"

"I'm fine," you interrupt, voice strained but steady. A step forward shrinks the distance between you and the bed. It's slow, shaky, but you trust in the familiarity of your own body's resilience. "I do this all the time."

"You what?" Remus is on his feet in an instant, moving toward you with a grace born of decades spent anticipating danger. His eyes are wide, the worry lines etched deeper into his forehead. He hovers, hands outstretched but not touching, as if afraid any contact might shatter the illusion of control you're so desperately clinging to. "Y/N, you've never—"

"Not in front of people," you clarify, your words punctuated by the effort it takes to lift your body another inch off the cold stone floor. Pain blossoms in your side, a reminder of the damage done, but you push past it, focusing on the familiar burn of used muscles and the steady rhythm of your heartbeat. "It's easier when I'm alone. Less... fuss."

"Less fuss?" James echoes, his voice threaded with disbelief. "If you need help, you can just—"

"I'm not going to fall," you assure them, even as your breath hitches from the effort. One final push and you're sitting on the edge of the bed, relief flooding through you as the soft mattress gives way beneath you. But even then, you can feel their eyes on you—watchful, wary, a mix of concern and curiosity.

Sirius's hand rakes through his hair as he paces in front of you, his expression etched with worry. "Why didn't you tell us you could walk, even if it was just a little?"

James sits at your side, one hand resting over yours, warm and grounding. "We've been friends for years, Y/N," he says, his voice gentler than you've ever heard it. "And now we're more than that. You never mentioned anything about this—we could've helped."

You look from one face to another, seeing the concern etched on each one, feeling the weight of the moment press down on you. These aren't strangers who will judge or ridicule; these are the people who have come to mean everything to you. They look back at you now, eyes filled not only with affection but also confusion, a slight sting of betrayal.

Remus is there too, perched on the edge of your bed, his fingers tracing soothing patterns on your back. "Why hide it from us?" His voice is soft, almost a whisper against the heavy silence. "You know we'd never think less of you, don't you?"

"It's not that," you say, your own voice just as quiet, your gaze shifting to Sirius who has stopped pacing and now stands with his arms crossed, his grey eyes burning into yours. "It's the way people look at me when they see me walking. Like I've been lying about needing the wheelchair. Like I'm some sort of... fraud."

James's grip on your hand tightens, not in anger but in silent solidarity. His brow furrows as he takes in your words, the implications hanging heavy in the air between you. "But we're not 'people,' sweetheart. You don't have to put up a front with us."

You nod, the heat of his hand seeping into yours, the rhythm of his thumb tracing small circles over your knuckles offering a strange sense of comfort. "I know, but it's easier this way. Easier not to have to explain or deal with the questions. And by the time I'm comfortable enough with someone to talk about it, it feels too late to bring up."

Sirius drops to a crouch in front of you, his hands resting lightly on your knees, his gaze searching your face for something only he knows. "You shouldn't have to explain yourself to anyone," he murmurs, "especially not to us. If you need the chair, you use the bloody chair. If you can walk, even just a bit, that's fine, too. We care about you, not what you can or can't do."

The corners of your mouth twitch upwards, just a fraction, at the sincerity in Sirius' voice. "I don't do it often," you admit, your voice barely above a whisper. "My balance is... off. I stumble more than I'd like. But I haven't fallen in years."

Remus' hand stills on your back, his brow furrowing as he looks at you, a new understanding dawning in his eyes. "You're saying you stumble but don't fall? How often does this happen?"

"More than I'd like to admit," you say, eyes dropping to your legs again. You flex your fingers, watching as the muscles in your arms respond to your command. "But I know my limits."

James exhales sharply, running a hand through his hair. "You've been facing this alone for so long... Why didn't you say something? We would've helped, just like we help Moony every month."

"But that's just it," you reply, voice barely above a whisper. "This isn't once a month. It's every day. I didn't want to worry you, or make you feel like you had to watch me constantly."

The laugh that escapes Sirius is soft, almost lost amid the rustle of fabric as he shifts closer. "We already watch you," he says, his tone light but the emotion behind it heavy with sincerity. "Not in a creepy way, mind you, but because we care. If you stumble, we're there. If you need help walking across a room, we've got you."

Remus tilts his head, pressing a gentle kiss to the side of your forehead, the warmth of his lips seeping through your skin and into your bones. "We're your partners," he murmurs, his voice a soothing balm against the harsh reality of your circumstances. "We face this together. You don't have to do anything alone anymore."

A shiver runs down your spine as James presses a kiss to your shoulder, his lips warm even through the thin fabric of your shirt. Sirius nestles his head against your knees, anchoring you, his presence a solid reminder that you are not alone—not now, not ever again. You feel cocooned in their warmth, the tension in your muscles beginning to ease under their careful ministrations.

"Alright," you concede, your voice barely above a whisper. You take a moment to meet each pair of eyes, holding their gazes, finding strength in their shared determination. "I'll try... to be more open with you. But seriously—no panicking if I so much as stand up to cross the room."

James chuckles, a soft sound that brings a flicker of normalcy back into the room. He leans over and plants a quick kiss on your cheek, his stubble grazing your skin. "Deal," he says, pulling back just enough to flash you a lopsided grin. "But we reserve the right to keep a close eye on you."

Sirius's smirk is a faint echo of his usual cockiness, tempered by the gravity of the situation. "Or catch you when you fall," he adds, resting his chin on your knee and looking up at you with an intensity that makes your heart flutter.

Remus's hand never leaves yours, his thumb tracing comforting circles over your knuckles. The lines around his eyes deepen as he smiles, a gentle expression that holds more warmth than the sun. "We love you, all of you. We're here for you—however you need us."

The swell of tears does not come from sadness this time, but rather the immense relief of being seen, truly seen, for who you are. You lean forward, placing a soft kiss on James's cheek, Sirius's forehead, and Remus's shoulder. Their arms tighten around you just a fraction, returning the sentiment without words. Warmth radiates from each touch, filling the spaces within you that have been cold for far too long.

"Thank you," you whisper, your voice barely audible even in the silence of the room. But they hear it, and their hold on you strengthens, anchoring you in this moment of acceptance and understanding.

You close your eyes, allowing yourself to sink into the comfort they provide. The walls you've spent years building around yourself begin to crumble, bit by bit, under the weight of their unwavering support. For the first time in what feels like forever, you don't feel the need to hide, to pretend, to be anything other than yourself.

[reflectionfamily]

Intro to Us - Masterpost

We’re The Reflection Family, a collective of over 200 members (so far) in eight different branches sharing a body. Our collective is organized into several distinct groups and categories, reflecting different origins, roles, and characteristics of our coanimans. Each branch has its unique dynamics and members, influenced by their proximity to certain fragments.

Types of Coanimans: A Guide to Our Color Coding

• The Original (White): Mckayla, the primary coaniman associated with the body.

• Core (Dark Grey): Human coanimans who are direct splits from Mckayla, sharing similar physical traits.

• Undead (Black): Coanimans disconnected from reality due to near-death experiences; not necessarily direct splits.

• Hypnosis (Desaturated Pink): Coanimans created via hypnosis, either accidentally or intentionally.

• Non-Human (Purple): Coanimans that are either direct splits or introjects of animals.

• Fiction-Sourced (Light Pink): Introjects named after fictional characters or celebrities.

• IRL-Sourced (Teal): Introjects from real-life relationships.

• Fragments (Green): Coanimans embodying singular characteristics and influencing nearby parts when co-conscious.

• Spirits (Light Grey): Protective entities or guides within the system.

Overview of Our Structure

Hosts: Who's in the background?

The hosts in the collective not only manage daily life, social interactions, and external relationships but also play a crucial role in preserving long-term memory recall within a collective memory bank. They act as the primary points of interaction with the outside world, ensuring that the collective's needs and responsibilities are met while maintaining a stable presence. By embodying qualities such as adaptability, resilience, and social awareness, the hosts effectively navigate diverse situations and challenges, presenting a cohesive identity to those outside the collective. Through their ability to coordinate with other parts and maintain access to shared memories, the hosts ensure continuity and a functional existence, bridging the internal world with external reality and fostering a sense of cohesion and unity within the collective.

• Veronica - 23-24 - Oversees relationships and social interactions.

• Sel - 17-24 - Manages school-related tasks.

• Selene - 18-24 - Focused on work and professional responsibilities.

• A39 - ageless - Responsible for switching between parts.

The Gatekeepers: Who Runs The System, Really?

The gatekeepers in the collective are vital entities responsible for managing and regulating access to various aspects of the inner world and the collective's complex internal landscape. They oversee the flow of memories, emotions, and information, ensuring that the right coanimans come forward when needed and that sensitive or potentially destabilizing memories are kept at bay until they can be safely processed. The gatekeepers also play a protective role, shielding more vulnerable members from traumatic recollections or overwhelming emotions. By maintaining a delicate balance between different parts and their experiences, the gatekeepers facilitate smoother transitions and interactions within the collective, contributing to overall stability and coherence in navigating daily life and therapeutic work.

• Charlotte - 20-45 - Gatekeeps the IRL subgroup.

• Jade - 15-24 - Oversees the Teens.

• James - 17-19 - Manages the Guys & Gays.

• Sarah - 8-20 - Responsible for the Middles.

• Elena - 8-14 - Oversees the Littles/Munchkins.

• Gemma - 25-45 - Responsible for the Hypnos.

• Patricia - 12-20 - Oversees the Shadows, managing more hidden or complex parts.

• Kara - 4-40 - Helps Fictional-Sourced members.

• Valzor - 30-43 - Manages parts connected to innerworld characters.

The Fragments - The 4 Corners of the Mind

The four fragments—Quietus, Reject, Bate, and Amends—each contribute to the collective's overall balance and resilience, shaping how the group interacts with both its internal landscape and the external world. These fragments represent different approaches to coping, healing, and navigating life's complexities, influencing the way coanimans respond to experiences and challenges. Together, they create a dynamic and multifaceted internal structure that fosters growth, adaptability, and a deeper understanding of self and surroundings, allowing for a cohesive yet varied approach to managing the collective's needs and interactions.

1. Quietus - Control and Repression - Quietus represents control, repression, and emotional suppression. As a fragment, Quietus embodies a deep need for stability, often at the cost of suppressing unwanted emotions and memories. This influence creates an environment where emotional expression is minimized to maintain order and prevent chaos within the system.

2. Reject - Identity and Exclusion - Reject grapples with feelings of rejection, self-worth, and exclusion. This fragment represents the internal struggle with identity and belonging, influencing coanimans who question their value and place within the collective. Reject’s influence is marked by a constant battle for self-acceptance and understanding, reflecting the complexities of identity formation and emotional growth.

3. Bate - Power and Anger - Bate embodies strength, power, and anger. This fragment channels defensive and assertive behaviors to protect or assert boundaries within the system. Bate’s influence is rooted in experiences of confrontation and resilience, shaping coanimans who are unafraid to express anger or assert their needs. This fragment also represents a willingness to fight against perceived threats or injustices, using power as a means of protection.

4. Amends - Comfort and Detachment - Amends focuses on comfort, detachment, and exploration. This fragment embodies the need for emotional solace and the detachment from painful or overwhelming experiences. Amends’ influence encourages exploration of inner worlds, seeking comfort through creativity, fantasy, and introspection. This fragment is characterized by a desire for emotional safety, often finding refuge in inner worlds and imaginative escapes.

Mckayla - The Original Lineage

Mckayla - 10 - The Original: The primary coaniman associated with the body, representing her current maturity level with therapy. Initially, she was stuck at age 6 when parts therapy began but has matured through therapeutic work.

Outside: The Ascended

Marah - The Unborn and Unique Presence

Marah - [Undead]: Represents Selene’s unborn daughter, a unique member within the collective, reflecting themes of unrealized potential and the complex emotional layers surrounding life, loss, and what could have been. She holds a special place in the collective, symbolizing a blend of innocence and the mysteries of existence.

Quietus’ Sphere of Influence - The Repressive Sphere

Quietus - Control and Repression - A fragment of control and repression, Quietus influences coanimans characterized by suppression, emotional restraint, and efforts to maintain stability by managing unwanted emotions and memories.

• Doe - The Watcher - A protective spirit animal within Quietus’ sphere, embodying caution and vigilance, overseeing the coanimans within this line.

Lil’s Line - The Innocence and Attachment Path

Lil’s line focuses on innocence, early childhood memories, and various forms of attachment and loss, exploring how these emotions manifest within the system.

Lil’s Subsystem - The Innocence Path

Lil represents the youngest, most innocent form, embodying early childhood. Her line expands through various aged-up versions that represent a progression from innocence to maturity:

• Lil - 2-4 - The Innocent [Core]: Represents the youngest, most innocent form, embodying early childhood.

• Lils - 5-9 [Core]: An aged-up version of Lil, representing an older and more developed form of innocence.

• Lily - 10-14 [Core]: Aged-up version of Lils; the “big” version, half-cat, half-human, based on the system’s cat.

• Lilith - 16-24 [Core]: The adult version of Lily, embodying a mature form of innocence.

Love’s Subsystem - The Attachment and Loss Line

Love embodies obsessive love and attachment, which further branches out into various representations of love and care, highlighting the complexities of relational dynamics within the system:

• Love - 13 - The Obsessive [Core]: Represents obsessive love, and splits into:

• Elena - 8-14 - The Caregiver [Core]: Represents sibling love and serves as a caregiver to the littles.

• Cherry - 17-18 - The Romantic [Core]: Represents romantic love.

• Nicole - 20-29 - The Sister [IRL]: Represents adoptive family connections.

• Michelle - 20-35 - The Protector [IRL]: Another representation of adoptive family ties.

Preciousy’s Subsystem - The Hypno Line

Preciousy, originally a cat, becomes a Hypno due to a traumatic loss. Her line focuses on themes of loss and trauma, represented by various parts that embody different aspects of these experiences:

• Preciousy - 6-16 - The Lost [Hypno]: Originally the system’s cat, now a Hypno due to trauma.

• Kat - 12-14 - The Feline [Hypno]: Represents a young version dealing with the emotional trauma of loss.

• Katerina [Core]: Further explores the themes of loss and attachment.

• Lindsey [IRL]: Represents deeper feelings of abandonment and healing.

• Bambi - 19 [Hypno]: Represents a mature aspect dealing with sensuality.

Clarissa’s Subsystem - The Machine Line

Clarissa, within Lil’s branch, is a unique entity representing non-human, mechanical aspects, emphasizing themes of emotionlessness and functionality:

• Clarissa - The Machine [Hypno]: A unique, machine-like entity that does not conform to typical human emotions.

• A39 - ageless [Hypno]: A drone responsible for mechanical tasks and operations.

• Syn - ageless [Hypno]: An AI system designed for processing and organizing information.

• Synth - ageless [Hypno]: A teen part handling intermediate tasks.

• Synthia - ageless [Hypno]: The adult part responsible for more complex operations.

Rosie’s Line - The Creative and Resilient Path

Rosie’s line focuses on creativity, resilience, and leadership, exploring themes of beauty, creative spirit, and artistic expression through various coanimans in this line.

Rosie’s Subsystem - The Creative Line

Rosie represents an early emotional split with creative tendencies, leading to various manifestations of creativity and artistic expression:

• Rosie - The Creative [Core]: Represents an early emotional split with a focus on creativity.

• Rose - 14-18 - The Resilient [Core]: Embodies themes of beauty and resilience.

• Rosalina - 10-14 [Core]: Represents a youthful creative spirit continuing Rosie’s theme.

Little Red’s Subsystem - The Survivor’s Path

Little Red explores themes of survival and caution, embodying resilience in the face of adversity:

• Little Red - 4-10 - The Survivor [Fiction]: Represents themes of survival and caution.

• Snow - 14-22 [Fiction]: Embodies themes of cold detachment and perseverance.

Cleopatra’s Subsystem - The Leadership Line

Cleopatra’s line is centered around leadership and heritage, embodying strength and leadership qualities:

• Cleopatra - 16-25 - The Leader [Fiction]: Represents themes of leadership and heritage.

• Marie - 14-18 [Fiction]: Embodies grace and poise.

• Mary - 16-19 [Fiction]: A youthful version dealing with innocence and purity.

Éponine’s Subsystem - The Unrequited Love Line

Éponine’s line represents themes of unrequited love and self-sacrifice, exploring emotional depth and complexity:

• Éponine - [Fiction]: Represents themes of unrequited love and self-sacrifice.

Reject’s Sphere of Influence - The Identity and Exclusion Sphere

Reject - Identity and Exclusion - Embodies the struggle with rejection, self-worth, and belonging, influencing coanimans who grapple with their sense of identity.

Angel’s Line - The Shadowed Innocence and Rejection Path

Angel’s line navigates themes of innocence entangled with feelings of rejection, exploring the dynamics of identity and self-worth through various manifestations within the system.

Angel’s Subsystem - The Shadowed Innocence Line

Angel, rooted in a childhood nickname, deals with themes of shadowed innocence and entrapment, reflecting on memories tied to familial nicknames and shadowy experiences:

• Angel - The Shadowed Innocent [Core]: Connected to a childhood nickname, represents innocence and purity.

• Angelica - [Core]: Trapped in the shadow realm as a child.

• Angelique - [Core]: Adult version who carries shared memories from Angelica’s time in the shadow realm.

Jordan and Caileigh’s Subsystem - The Almost-Identity Line

This subsystem explores identities that almost were, reflecting on alternate life paths and identities that the body might have had:

• Jordan - 8-16 - The Boy That Wasn’t [Core]: Represents a male identity that the body might have had.

• Caileigh - 8-14 - The Twin [Core]: Another almost-name, twin to Jordan.

• Lauren - [IRL]: Based on a real-life school friend.

BB Grrl’s Subsystem - The Nickname Line

BB Grrl represents another nickname that forms a distinct line exploring different facets of identity, shaped by external influences and introjections:

• BB Grrl - [Core]: Nickname-based coaniman.

• Miss Blank - [Core]: Views herself as the stepfather’s daughter.

• Gemma - 25-45 - The Anarchist [Fiction]: Connected to “Sons of Anarchy.”

• Tara - [Fiction]: Also inspired by “Sons of Anarchy.”

Nico’s Subsystem - The Bug Line

Nico’s line represents themes of fragility and resilience, characterized by nonverbal communication and various representations of small, resilient creatures:

• Nico - [IRL]: Introject of stepdad’s son.

• Bug - [Non-Human]: Represents smallness and fragility.

• Ant - [Non-Human]: Embodies diligence and teamwork.

• Flea - [Non-Human]: Represents resilience and survival.

• Ladybug - [Non-Human]: Carries themes of luck and protection.

Chica’s Subsystem - The Lost Doll Line

Chica, embodying a lost childhood object, explores themes of playfulness and loss, reflecting on childhood experiences and the creation of playful personas:

• Chica - [Core]: A Mexican doll reflecting childhood memories.

• Señorita Squishyface - [Core]: A playful persona that emerged from having her cheeks squished together to be cute.

Michaela’s Line - The Familial Memory and Identity Path

Michaela’s line is deeply rooted in family memories and identities, reflecting the various aspects of familial roles, relationships, and the complexities of family dynamics within the system.

Millie’s Subsystem - The Childhood Memory Line

Millie encompasses early childhood memories, capturing the innocence and experiences of youth and representing foundational aspects of the family identity:

• Millie - 0-14 [Core]: Embodies young memories, up to age 14.

• Tigger - [Non-Human]: Represents a past pet horse.

• Magic - [Non-Human]: Represents another past pet horse.

Kayla’s Subsystem - The Animal Care Line

Kayla represents a strong connection to animals and veterinary skills, showcasing a deep commitment to caring for and understanding animals:

• Kayla - [Core]: Represents veterinary skills and animal care.

• Abraham - [Non-Human]: Represents a specific animal connection.

• Sarai - [Non-Human]: Represents another specific animal connection.

• Winter - [Non-Human]: Represents care for a baby squirrel.

Mckay and Mikey’s Subsystem - The Twin Identity Line

Mckay and Mikey explore the dynamics of gender and twin identities, showcasing the fluidity and complexity of self-identification within the system:

• Mckay - [Core]: Represents a genderfluid aspect of Michaela.

• Mikey - 8-15 - The Boy Twin [Core]: Represents a boy version who eventually split into two parts.

• Mickey - 13-18 [Core]: A trans demi-girl.

• MJ - 16-19 [Core]: An older teen boy.

Jezebel’s Subsystem - The Protector and Fighter Line

Jezebel represents themes of protection and fighting spirit, embodying a defensive and assertive role within the system to manage conflict and anger:

• Jezebel - 24 - The Fighter [Core]: Emerged during a physical altercation with a family member.

• Valerie - 24 [Core]: Represents anger and protection.

Liz’s Subsystem - The Maternal Influence Line

Liz, along with her splits, embodies different aspects of maternal influence and roles, reflecting complex relationships with the mother figure:

• Liz - 30 [IRL]: Represents Michaela’s real mother.

• Eliza - 18-30 [IRL]: Represents a Catholic witch version.

• Lizzy - 18-30 [IRL]: Represents a nurse version.

• Bobbiette - 18-30 [IRL]: Represents a best friend from the mother’s high school years.

Support Figures Subsystem - The Guiding and Supportive Influences

This line also includes figures who have provided guidance, support, or therapeutic influence within the system, showcasing roles of caretaking and mentorship:

• Kristi - [IRL]: Represents Michaela’s therapist.

• Jenny - 30-35 [IRL]: Represents a surrogate mother figure.

Jade’s Line - The Intersex and Trauma Identity Path

Jade’s line reflects the complexity of intersex identity and trauma, exploring themes of gender, personal and adoptive identities, and the impact of past relationships and experiences.

Jade’s Subsystem - The Intersex Identity Line

Jade, embracing an intersex identity, due to PCOS, high testosterone, and genetic endometriosis, and navigates the interplay of personal and adoptive identities within hxr subsystem:

• Jade - The Intersex Identity [Core]: Integrates both personal and adoptive identities, reflecting an intersex identity and the navigation of related complexities.

• CJ - The Trans Demi-Guy [Core]: Represents a young trans demi-guy, highlighting an early stage of gender exploration.

• JC - The Teen Male [Core]: An older split from CJ, representing the evolution of gender identity into the teen years.

• James - The Adult Intersex Male [Core]: An adult manifestation of intersex identity, encompassing the culmination of gender exploration and identity solidification.

Selene’s Subsystem - The Trauma and Relationship Line

Selene’s line deals with trauma and relationship dynamics, reflecting on past experiences and the impact of relational ties:

• Selene - [Core]: Central co-host with a large subsystem.

• Chlöe - [Core]: A recent split due to medication changes.

• Leena - [Core]: Holds relationship trauma from the last ex.

• Sel - [Core]: School host, splits into Celeste, Ivy, and Ruby.

• Ruby - [Core]: Holds sexual trauma, splits into:

• Warren (IRL): an ex

• Wren (Core): tied to Warren, possibly undead

• Marissa - 19 - [Hypno]: a bimbo who spits into:

• Harley (Fiction): Harley Quinn

• Mav (IRL): of a past partner

Charlotte’s Subsystem - The Legacy Line

Charlotte’s subsystem encapsulates familial and fictional influences, integrating various introjects that represent different aspects of familial history and personal attachments:

• Charlotte - [Core]: Jade’s grandmother.

• Ty - [Core]: Represents Charlotte’s nephew.

• Midnight - [Non-Human]: Her Mother’s horse.

• Maxine - [Non-Human]: Her Cat.

• Nina - [Non-Human]: Her Sister’s dog.

• Laura Ingalls Wilder - [Fiction]: Fictional introject from “Little House on the Prairie.”

• Anne - [Fiction]: Introject from “Anne of Green Gables.”

Celebrity Influences Subsystem - The Iconic Personas Line

This subsystem reflects the integration of celebrity influences, embodying themes of understanding, strength, and mental health awareness through iconic personas:

• Carrie Fisher - [Fiction]: Represents a connection to mental health advocacy and trauma understanding.

• Amy Lee - [Fiction]: Symbolizes themes of emotional expression and resilience in dealing with personal struggles.

Bate’s Sphere of Influence - The Power and Anger Branch

Bate - Power and Anger - Influences coanimans who embody strength, power, and anger, often manifesting as defensive or assertive behaviors to protect or assert themselves.

• Amaraeth - The Guardian - A guardian spirit within Bate’s sphere, embodying spiritual power and protection, guiding coanimans under Bate’s influence.

Violet’s Line - The Undead Path

Violet’s line explores themes of survival, transformation, and undead characteristics, reflecting on near-death experiences and the journey of strength and resilience.

Violet’s Subsystem - The Undead and Flower Line

Violet starts the undead and flower line due to a near-death experience. This subsystem reflects themes of survival, transformation, and protection:

• Violet - The Survivor [Undead]: Created due to near-death experiences.

• Lilac - [Non-Human]: Represents another part of the flower line.

• Poppy - [Non-Human]: Represents another flower line extension.

• Jasmine - [Non-Human]: Represents further depth in the flower line.

• Iris - 19 - The Defender [Undead]: A defender coaniman above body-age, often managing protection roles.

• Kali - 19-25 [Undead]: Embodies themes of destruction and transformation.

• Cora - [Fiction]: A fictional mother introject, representing nurturing and protection.

• Kira - 14-18 [Undead]: A dominant part during high school.

• Ranèe - [Undead]: A bigender version of a high school best friend.

• Veronica - 23-24 [Half-Undead]: One of the current hosts.

Veronica’s Subsystem - The Host and Introject Line

Veronica’s subsystem explores themes of hosting and introjection, reflecting on relationships and the blending of internal and external influences:

• Veronica - 23-24 [Half-Undead]: One of the current hosts.

• Todd - [IRL]: An introject of the system’s boyfriend.

• Lady - [IRL]: A female introject of the boyfriend.

• April - [Hypno]: A happy hypno part.

• Doll - [Hypno]: Another, this time porcelain, doll

• Mistress - [Hypno]: A Mistress.

Patricia’s Subsystem - The Shadow Realm Line

Patricia, a vampire gatekeeper of the shadow realm, explores themes of memory manipulation and subconscious control, reflecting on the system’s shadow aspects:

• Patricia - 12-20 - The Gatekeeper [Undead]: A vampire gatekeeper of the shadow realm.

• Bryce - 18 [IRL]: Created accidentally during memory repression.

Kara’s Subsystem - The Fictive Gatekeeper Line

Kara (Supergirl) is the gatekeeper of fictives, reflecting on themes of imagination and the role of fiction in shaping internal experiences and identities:

• Kara - 4-40 - The Fictive Gatekeeper [Fiction]: Helps manage fictives and introduces fictional character elements.

• Minnie - 3-8 [Fiction]: Represents “Minnie Mouse,” the mini mom.

• Melody - 4-9 [Fiction]: Represents “Ariel’s daughter,” the mermaid.

• Mulan - [Fiction]: Represents “Mulan,” the warrior.

• Sara - [Fiction]: Represents “The Little Princess.”

• Annaliese - 18-19 [Fiction]: Represents “Barbie (Princess and the Pauper).”

• Hannah M - 12-15 [Fiction]: Represents “Hannah Montana.”

• Lilia - 8-18 [IRL]: Represents an introject from a real-life friend.

Shared Sphere of Influence - The Resilient Power and Comfort Sphere

Shared Influence from Amends and Bate - Power and Comfort -This sphere merges the influences of Bate, emphasizing power and anger, with Amends, focusing on comfort and detachment, creating a blend of strength and comfort-seeking behaviors.

Sarah’s Line - The Faithful and Spiritual Path

Sarah’s line encompasses themes of faith, spirituality, and resilience, reflecting on the journey of inner strength and spiritual connection within the system.

Sarah’s Subsystem - The Faithful and Spiritual Line

Sarah V is a core figure embodying faith and introspection. Her subsystem is diverse, exploring deep spiritual connections and biblical influences:

• Sarah V - The Faithful [Core]: Represents a deep connection to faith and internal reflection.

• Teva Levanna - [Core]: Represents a transformation during conversion classes to Judaism.

Esther’s Subsystem - The Biblical Triad and Protective Spirits

Centered around biblical and protective themes, this subsystem explores different aspects of familial and romantic stories, as well as protection within the system:

• Esther - 16-18 [Core]: Represents a Biblical influence with several splits:

• Rebecca - 8-12 [Core]: Represents a young, foundational Biblical character.

• Leah - [Core]: Represents the “unloved” Biblical figure.

• Rachel - 12-20 [Core]: Represents the “beloved” counterpart.

• Eliana - [IRL]: Represents a protective response to a traumatic experience.

• Belle - [Core]: Represents a romantic influence.

Zara’s Subsystem - The Intellectual and Feline Line

Zara’s line explores intellectual and feline themes, reflecting on scholarly aspects and protective instincts within familial relationships:

• Zara - [Core]: Formerly known as Sarah F.

• Natalie - [Core]: Represents a refined, scholarly aspect.

• Diana - 30-45 [IRL]: Represents a grandmother figure introject with specific traits.

• Cleo - 23 [Non-human]: Represents a sweet, black and white Persian cat.

• Shay - 12-16 [Non-human]: Represents a more reserved and cautious cat.

Aurora’s Kingdom Subsystem - The Inner World Builders

Sarah V also constructed an inner world known as The Kingdom of Aurora, a realm reflecting the system’s creative and spiritual depths. This world is inhabited by various characters and represents the complex interplay between creativity and spiritual introspection:

• Lizbeth - [IRL]: Represents a mother figure in the inner world.

• Valzor - 30-43 [Non-human]: Represents a metaphorical introject and antagonist.

• June - 2-15 [Non-human]: Represents a clone of Jade with embedded trauma memories.

• Scarlett - 8-15 [Non-human]: Represents a clone of Sarah with embedded trauma memories.

• Genie - 30-45 [Non-human]: Represents a shapeshifter with mystical ties.

• Solaria - [Non-human]: Represents a swamp witch with connections to inner narratives.

• Riku - [Non-human]: Represents an advisor to a fictional queen.

• Maya - 45-60 [Non-human]: Represents a slain dragon mother.

• Zayn - 6-19 [Non-human]: Represents her son turned dragon.

• Keeper of Secrets - [Non-human]: Represents a Gorian linked to subconscious thoughts.

• Daniel - 28-33 [Non-human]: Represents a pretty boy introject.

• Hunter - 18-30 [Non-human]: Represents a lover of animals.

• Xander - 25-35 [Non-human]: Represents a photography enthusiast.

• Zen - 35-50 [Non-human]: Represents a peaceful lover.

Amends’ Sphere of Influence - The Comfort and Detachment Sphere

Amends - Comfort and Detachment - Focuses on coanimans who provide comfort or exhibit a significant detachment from the core self, reflecting themes of exploration, longing, and searching for connection.

Callie’s Line - The Detachment and Exploration Path

Callie’s line focuses on themes of detachment, exploration, and the search for connection, often reflecting experiences related to childhood trauma and the longing for belonging and comfort.

Callie’s Subsystem - The Foster Care Twins and Fantasy Line

Callie embodies the detachment experienced during early childhood trauma in foster care. Her direct splits, Roslyn and Luna, explore themes of enchantment and escapism:

• Callie - The Explorer [Core]: Represents the first split in foster care, disconnected from Mckayla directly.

• Roslyn - [Core]: Represents a twin aspect, inspired by the first foster home experience.

• Nessie - [Non-human]: Represents a fae connection from a magical encounter.

Luna’s Subsystem - The Star Wars Galaxy Explorers

Luna’s fascination with space and escapism led her to craft an entire inner world inspired by the Star Wars galaxy, populated by various characters that reflect her desire to explore unknown territories:

• Luna - 8-16 [IRL]: Represents a space-loving, daydreamer persona.

• Tuila - 16 [Non-human]: Represents a “Star Wars” inspired character.

• Carina - [Non-human]: Represents a nebula-inspired character.

• Orion - [Non-human]: Represents another nebula inspiration.

• Venus - [Non-human]: Represents a planet-based inspiration.

• Eros - [Non-human]: Represents an asteroid-inspired character.

• Leo - [Non-human]: Represents a constellation-based character.

• Pluto - [Non-human]: Represents another planet-based inspiration.

Callie’s Fictive Subsystem - The Motherless Characters

Callie also developed a series of fictive alters reflecting themes of abandonment and searching for belonging, focusing on characters who are motherless or seeking maternal connections:

• Dorothy - 14-18 [Fiction]: Represents a motherless fictive who feels homeless.

• Eloise - 9-12 [Fiction]: Represents a character waiting for her mother’s visits.

• Lilo - 6-12 [Fiction]: Represents “Lilo” from “Lilo and Stitch,” symbolizing found family and resilience.

• Madeline - 6-10 [Fiction]: Represents a boarding school student.

• Rapunzel - [Fiction]: Represents a character given up by her parents.

Callie's Adoption and Friendship Subsystem

Callie’s experiences with adoption are explored through parts that reflect themes of identity formation and friendship within an adoptive context:

• Hannah S - [IRL]: Represents a friend introject who is also adopted, symbolizing shared experiences of adoption and identity search.

--- End.

[accio-halley]

The Sun Will Rise

Part 1

Remus Lupin x reader

18+ mature content

tw: angst, some cursing, alcohol, smoking, no smut… YET :’)

Word count: 2000+ish

Remus was exhausted, ragged, weathered, and utterly run down. Life had never been easy or fair to him. The cards never played in his favor. But he was so strong. So brave. After graduating from Hogwarts, he devoted most of his time to the order of the phoenix. He rarely rested or took time for himself and he didn’t really worry about his well-being. In his free time, the darkness settled in. He drank his sorrows away and chain smoked cigarettes until his thoughts stopped tormenting him. He felt that he had no true desire or purpose in life after his one true love had gone away.

Pansy Prickett. The very first friend he had made at Hogwarts. A friend that he fell in love with over the years as their friendship blossomed. The kind, beautiful, intelligent girl with wavy, pale blonde hair and brilliant green eyes. His Pansy. After graduating from Hogwarts, her parents sent her to one of the most prestigious universities to study. Pansy wanted to badly to stay and study somewhere locally, but her parents were funding her education, so ultimately they made the decision and sent her hundreds of miles away. Pansy left before Remus had the chance to tell her how he felt and he still hated himself for that three years later.

Remus was not taking care of himself in any way, shape, or form. He chain smoked cigarettes and drank like a fish in his free time. Occasionally he would even light up a joint. Anything to mask the pain of the hole Pansy left in his heart. His hair was grown out and shaggy, his facial hair unkempt. He was drowning in the pain of Pansy being gone. As the months turned to years, he only felt the emptiness more and more. He turned to alcohol and drugs to ease the pain and numb the loneliness. He had no idea how to move forward with his life. He wished things could be different. He wished he could see Pansy again... to tell her how much he loved her and how beautiful he found her. But it seemed like that would never happen.

Remus had been living a lonely, self-destructive lifestyle since the day she left. It was as if she had taken a piece of him with her. He was empty inside, and he had lost his way. He felt like he had nothing to live for anymore. His life was in shambles. The empty bottles and cigarette butts in his apartment reminded him of the hole in his heart. And the memories of Pansy were constant ghosts, reminding him of what he had and so badly yearned for.

He knew his self-destructive lifestyle would lead him to ruins eventually. He didn't even know why he was trying to hang on. Maybe he hoped that the pain in his heart would go away eventually. Or perhaps it was his hope that one day, Pansy would return. Remus was always the one giving support, the one helping out. But no one was there to support him. He felt alone in the world. But he never complained or gave up. He put on a strong facade for the sake of everyone else as they fought the war against Lord Voldemort.

Remus looked up as the door to his study opened suddenly; James Potter walked in, looking slightly worn. He was holding something behind his back. James smiled despite his exhaustion. Remus noticed that his friend was hiding something.

“Er- What have you got there?” Remus asked skeptically as he put the cigarette that he had been smoking out.

James' smile grew a little wider as he revealed the object that he was hiding behind his back. It was a small, black bottle with a white label. On the label, it said "Wolfsbane Potion". James stepped towards Remus and placed the bottle on his desk with a soft thud.

"For you," James spoke softly. "You've done so much for everyone else... but who's doing anything for you?"

“James-“ Remus choked out.

James had no clue just exactly what this potion would do for Remus. With this potion, when Remus transitioned into a wolf each full moon it would make him docile and lethargic instead of his usual feral, ferocious nature of being a werewolf. It would take away his fears of killing while he was consumed by the wolf within. Remus looked down at the bottle for a few seconds and then looked up at James. His eyes were filled with gratitude and relief.

"I..." Remus was speechless, “James, you have no idea how much I've needed this," he said, his voice thick with emotion.

“Just… take care of yourself, buddy.” James mumbled. He patted Remus’ shoulder before leaving the room.

Remus watched as James walked out of his office. He was grateful to have a friend like James. Someone willing to do whatever it takes to help the greater good. As he sat in his office, he took a moment to reflect on his life. But that only made the emptiness and pain worse. He reached over and grabbed the bottle of Wolfsbane Potion. Perhaps it could help him... perhaps it could ease his pain. And it had came just in time. Tomorrow would be another full moon. On Halloween of all days.

Remus's heart sank at the thought of another full moon. It was frightening, but it was even more so knowing that it was happening on Halloween. He knew that the full moon would bring him pain and misery and he didn't want to go through it again. But he had never felt so hopeless and powerless before. He needed to take the wolfsbane before it was too late.

He unstoppered the potion and took the appropriate amount. It tasted absolutely disguising. Remus cringed and quivered all over as he forced the liquid down his throat. He felt sick as it hit his stomach. It was bitter, sour, and completely repulsive. But knowing that it might bring him some relief from the constant fear and pain that he had been trapped in pushed him to force it all down.

Remus was unsure of what would happen to him because he had never taken Wolfsbane before. Sure, he’d heard of it and it’s miraculous benefits for werewolves as himself. However, it was quite pricey so he could never afford it. But he wasn’t really worried about the side effects, if there were any. Nothing could be worse than the pain that he already endured each full moon. But in his eyes, no pain could compare to the pain of missing his true love.

As the hours went by, he felt a strange sensation taking over his body. He was feeling tired and lethargic. His movements were becoming sluggish and he felt like he needed to lay down and take a long nap. Maybe this wouldn’t be too bad…

Remus's body was beginning to feel heavy and his movements were becoming sluggish. He yawned and stretched out on the couch. He couldn't believe it... he wasn't feeling the usual anxiety and fear associated with the full moon. Instead, he just felt calm, relaxed, and a bit sleepy. He closed his eyes to take a nap before he could experience what would be his first full moon without the fear and pain of the werewolf transformation.

And the next morning Remus awoke feeling the best he had ever felt after transitioning during a full moon. He still felt utterly exhausted but he didn’t have to endure the excruciating pain of the transition and felt no desire to run ravenously through the forest and kill.

Remus sat up on his bed, stretching and yawning. He felt a bit groggy but was otherwise feeling completely fine. No pains or aches from the transformation. He took a deep breath and stood up, feeling the calmness and peace throughout his body. He looked out of the window, smiling to himself. It was the first peaceful full moon he had ever experienced since he had became a werewolf when he was a boy. He wondered if the potion would work the same for him every month. He hoped so… Yet he was still so broken inside. So tired. No purpose in his life since Pansy was gone.

But oddly, as he looked out the window of his apartment he noticed people in the streets celebrating. There were cheers and laughter.

What was going on? What had happened?

Remus was puzzled as he looked out of the window of his apartment. He saw people in the street below him, cheering and laughing. There was a positive and festive atmosphere, and even though he didn't quite understand what was going on, he felt the joy and relief of the moment wash over him. He stood there for a moment, watching the happy and relieved faces down below. He opened the window slightly, curious to see what was going on. He overheard people shouting.

“He is dead! The Dark Lord is gone for good!”

Remus heard cheers and shouts coming from the people in the street below. He opened the window slightly higher to listen more closely, trying to understand what had happened.

"The Dark Lord is dead!”

Remus stared out of the window in stunned disbelief. Voldemort... is dead? This couldn't be true. But the people sounded just as shocked as he was.

"It's true! He's really gone! It's over!" someone else shouted.

Remus closed the window and quickly got dressed. He had to know if the rumors were true. He had to find his friends. He knew James would know the truth.

There was no way that he could believe it right now.

He hurried down the street where almost everyone was celebrating. He overheard more conversation.

“Yes, he killed them both. He even tried to kill their son but something went wrong. And he is gone!”

Remus froze and wheeled around facing the person who had just said that.

“Who?” Remus demanded in an exasperated voice, “Who is dead?”

“James and Lily Potter. A real shame, truly.” The man muttered.

Remus’ world seemingly shocked. This couldn’t be. He had just seen James the night before. Remus felt like he couldn't breathe- the entire world was spinning around him. James and Lily... dead? He started shaking uncontrollably, his body unable to comprehend what he was hearing.

"Lily and James... dead?" He whispered the words as if to check if he was hearing them correctly.

They felt like a foreign language leaving his mouth.

This couldn't be true... this couldn't happen...

He stumbled down the street. He had to know if it was true. He was hoping when he reached the Potter’s house, he could laugh and tell the James and Lily about the outrageous rumors he has heard on the street. Remus stumbled out of the crowd and down the street, his mind racing. He had to confirm if it was true. He had to see the Potters' house for himself to know what he was hearing on the street was true. He was hoping, praying, that it was all just a rumor. That he would reach their home and find Lily and James there, laughing at his reaction after pulling a cruel prank.

The walk was painfully slow and every footfall felt like a stab in his heart. His legs were shaking, his body numb. But he had to keep on walking. He had to find out the truth.

When he found the Potter’s home, it was in ruins… His chest heaved and tears brimmed his eyes. He felt like he was suffocating. This couldn’t be… The sight of it was enough to tell him that it could only be true.

“No…” He choked out the words in a whisper, as if he was still praying that it was a cruel joke. He dropped to his knees in disbelief.

"No... no.. no..."

He didn't know what to do or think. The emptiness he was feeling was like nothing he had ever experienced before. He felt like he was suffocating.

A/N:

Hi everyone!!! This is the first part. I’m still trying to gain my confidence in posting my writing for the public to read, so please be kind. :)

I would love to receive some requests. <3

[shireenseno]

The Last Frame of the Day (Dream Telegram) An exhibition of works to be viewed before falling asleep. Curated by James Clar One of the eight exhibitions of the first Ctrl+P Biennale

Hypnagogic hyp·na·go·gic ˌ hip-nə-ˈgä-jik-ˈgō-: of, relating to, or occurring in the period of drowsiness immediately preceding sleep “The hypnagogic state is that heady lull between wakefulness and sleep when thoughts and images flutter, melt, and transform into wild things.” – Cate McQuaid (Boston Globe, October 1, 1998)

As a light and media artist focusing on new technological production processes and their application to artistic narrative forms, I was inspired by Gregor Janson in his essay “Nothing New Under the Sun” [1] where he describes cinema as a dream-factory, which takes us prisoner in darkness. Essential for the cinema’s spell and fascination is precisely this darkness, which provokes immersion in a sort of cave of the subconscious, within which the images (of artificial light) develop their suggestive power. This combined with concepts of Dream Telepathy, [2] where communication can be done to someone while in a subconscious state were of interest in this project. Artworks generally require an active, focused state, but these works require the viewer to lose focus. The hope, of course, is for the works to become entry points into the viewers’ dream-space.

The artists were asked “If you could control what the last thing an audience sees before going to sleep, what would it be? What would be your wish as the last frame of their waking moment and the first frame of their dream state.” With cultural diversity and mythic undertones, their creations become a contemporary reflection on “Charon’s Obol.” [3] the coin placed in or on the mouth of a dead person before burial. The myth resonates metaphorically as a token passage into the realm of dreams.

Thus, the artists in this exhibition were invited to create works that would be the last thing a viewer sees/experiences before falling asleep. Considering the ubiquity of mobile phones used at bedtime, it is only fitting that the works were produced specifically for viewing on phones during the viewer’s transition from wakefulness to sleep. They are best experienced one work at a time as bridge from the conscious to the subconscious. There are 17 works altogether. A viewer should experience the whole exhibition one work every night within 17 days.

Click to view exhibition (on your phone)

[thatblackravenclaw]

Fresh Morning Dew

Blog Details | Let’s take a trip

Poly!Marauders x Black! fem! reader (house neutral)

warning(s): not tooth-rotting fluff but pretty fluffy

word count: 1k

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Owls sing their song in the early morning. I woke up a couple of hours ago to soak in the silence of dawn. It’s one of the most perfect times to be awake. No one wants anything of you because no one is awake. It seems as if for one moment the world just stopped. Sometimes I wish it could stay like this.

This has been a tradition of ours ever since we became close. On the last day of summer, right before sunrise, we get a blanket and go to the highest and safest hill and watch the sun rise together. We kept up the tradition when we started dating. Now, no matter what is going on in our lives we make sure to keep this tradition alive. 

The routine is the same. Sirius and I are always the last to wake. We are more of moon rise people. Sometimes whenever there is a full moon, we’ll just stay awake and stargaze while lying on the same blanket that we lie on during sunrise. I’ll point out his star and he’ll point out my Zodiac constellation if they are visible in the sky. We then end up heading to bed around 2:30 in the morning when the moon has shifted out of sight to another part of the city behind the buildings. The following morning, James and Remus struggle to wake us from our slumber. It doesn’t take long until we realize why they are forcing us up and we decide to cooperate with them. Exactly what happened this morning. 

The soft plush rubs against my freshly shaven legs. Most of my weight was being put on my arms while I leaned back with my hands on the blanket. I’m only sporting my blue, striped cotton shorts and white tank top; thankful for the slight humidity that fills the summer morning air. My locs are pulled into a ponytail, but due to the length, it’s a moot point. They scratched against my back and arms, but it’s a sensation I’ve grown used to. No longer jumping when I think it’s an insect that has found its way onto my limbs. My shoes were on the grass next to my legs so as to not get the blanket dirty and wet with the morning dew. The sun peeked from behind the horizon. The lovely dark blue transitions to beautiful auburn. Not a single cloud was in the sky. Once the Sun was in full view, I transferred my gaze to my boys. The orange hues looked beautiful against their faces. Remus’ eyes were closed as he soaked in the morning. His long lashes fluttered against his cheeks. His scars were highlighted against the morning light, making him 10 times more gorgeous. Sirius’ sat next to him. His eyes weren’t closed, but they were squinted as he stared at the Sun full-on. His brown eyes shone brightly as the light hit them. His hair was up in a bun. I assume it was due to the humidity. Last was James. His head laid upon Sirius’ shoulder. He pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose and wiped off the perspiration that found a home on the bottom of the bridge. I looked back at the Sun and mimicked Sirius. The darkness of the sky is behind us, indicating the day has truly started. Without moving my gaze, I picked up Remus’ hand and kissed the back of it. A content sigh slipped through my lips. After a moment, I placed his hand back in its original place on my thigh and reached over to get my shoes.

That was 3 hours ago. Once we got back inside of our flat, the boys went back to our bed. I smiled as they laid back down and held each other in their arms. You never get used to it. Finding the love of your life is an incredible feat and I have 3 of them. I should be considered the luckiest woman in the world. I do consider myself the luckiest woman in the world. I’m not rich nor do I have a big, fancy job. I’m rich in the fact that I have something that not many others have. These men are my world and I wouldn’t trade them for all the stars in the galaxy. I am however happy that they decided to go back to sleep. I’ve been trying to read this book, but lately, everything has been so hectic. We all have to be on the train to Hogwarts tomorrow. Only Remus and I have packed and we still have to get school supplies today. My mind is racing with all that we have to do as I pour tea into one of our novelty mugs. This mug is in the shape of a snowman and whenever the mug gets hot, the cheeks turn a warm pink. As the water rises in the mug, the colour slowly starts to emerge. While I wait for it to steep I can’t help but be drawn back to my boyfriends. I walk across the room and up the two steps that lead to the platform that our bed is on. James is Remus’ little spoon while Sirius faces James. Remus and Sirius's fingers are interlocked. Soft snores fill the area. I tiptoe over to the left side of the bed where Sirius is. My lips meet his cheek and his lips absently pull into a small smile. His eyes flutter open. First, his eyes see our boyfriends sleeping figures before his body slightly turns towards behind him where I stand. 

“Come lay down, lovely.” His fingers slip from Remus's and he holds his hand out to me. I open the cover enough to be able to slide in. Sirius scooches in to give me room. Once I’m lying behind him, I gently cover his hand with mine. I press myself against his back and with a kiss on the back of his neck, the tea is quickly forgotten about and my eyes shut to sleep through the rest of the morning.

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Marauders Masterlist | United Kingdom

[rygoespop]

Thomas and Friends: Legends of Sodor (Story 93): A Tiger Christmas (Christmas Special)

Narrator: A Tiger Christmas

Scene opens with Yong Bao puffing down the line on Sodor, pulling 5 Oil Tankers

Narrator: While he came to Sodor from China to help out, Yong Bao was delivering some oil to the Smelter’s Yard

Thomas: *blew his whistle* Morning Yong Bao!

Yong Bao: Morning Thomas!

Thomas: Are you excited to celebrate your first Christmas here on Sodor?

Yong Bao: Why yes I am, I never celebrated Christmas on Sodor before

Thomas: Oh your gonna love it, it’s gonna be the best Christmas for you to see

Yong Bao: Oh I will Thomas

Scene transitions to Yong Bao arriving at Knapford Station, followed by a cameo from Oliver pulling Old Slow Coach and Toad, as Sir Topham Hatt was on the platform

Narrator: One day, Yong Bao came to Knapford, Sir Topham Hatt waited for him

STH: Since it’ll be your first Christmas here on Sodor, I need you to take some Coal and Oil to Barrow-in-Furness on The Mainland

Yong Bao: You can count on me sir! *blew his whistle and puffs off*

As Yong Bao left, Thomas came up

Thomas: Now that Yong Bao is busy, let’s begin decorating for his surprise

Scene transitions to Yong Bao arriving at Brendam Docks, backing up to his train, consisting of 4 Coal Cars and 5 Oil Tankers

Narrator: Soon, Yong Bao arrived at the Docks, he backed up to his train

Salty oiled up next to him

Salty: Yargh, it be Christmas Time at night

Yong Bao: Oh indeed Salty, I’m excited to celebrate Christmas for the first time

Salty: That’s the spirit me hearty!

Yong Bao: Well, better deliver the Coal and Oil over to the Mainland, bye Salty! *blew his whistle and puffs off*

Salty: Good luck Yong Bao

Scene transitions to Yong Bao puffing through the snowy line

Narrator: Soon, Yong Bao hurried along the line, it was snowy

Yong Bao: Can’t be late, I must not be late

Soon, Diesel oiled down the other line, with his Snowplough, and sprayed snow on him

Diesel: Heh heh heh! How’s that for a snow fight?!

Yong Bao: *crossed* Diesel!?

Scene transitions to Yong Bao puffing up to a signal box, a signalman was waving him down

Narrator: Soon, Yong Bao came across a signalman

Yong Bao’s Driver: What’s the matter?

Signalman: There’s an engine broken down on the line

Yong Bao: Well, we must find who this engine is

Scene transitions to Yong Bao puffing down the line and came across D261, broken down on the same line

Narrator: Soon, Yong Bao came to the rescue

Yong Bao: Hello, who are you?

D261: Me? I’m D261

Yong Bao: D261? Hey, I think I heard about you, your the diesel who once sucked a bowler hat through your air intake

D261 sulked as he didn’t wanna be reminded of what happened

D261: Please don’t bring that up!

Yong Bao: Well, you are stuck, and I can’t be held up long, this calls for a rescue

Yong Bao buffered up behind D261, blew his whistle and shunted D261 and pulled his train to Barrow-in-Furness

Narrator: Soon, Yong Bao buffered up to D261 and carried on to Barrow-in-Furness

Scene transitions to Yong Bao puffing into Barrow-in-Furness, with the train and D261, as passengers looked on

Narrator: At last, Yong Bao arrived at Barrow-in-Furness on The Mainland

Man: Look, that engine has delivered the Coal and Oil from Sodor

Woman: And he shunted that diesel here

Boy; Three cheers for Yong Bao!

The people cheered for Yong Bao

Yong Bao: Oh thank you all

Flying Scotsman puffed in as he whistled

Flying Scotsman: Well done Yong Bao, you delivered the coal and oil on time!

Yong Bao: Thank you Flying Scotsman

Flying Scotsman: Now, how about we head to Sodor together, there’s a party going on at Knapford

Yong Bao: Sounds good Scotsman!

Scene transitions to night, as Yong Bao and Flying Scotsman arrived at Knapford, but it was dark

Narrator: That night, Yong Bao and Flying Scotsman arrived at Knapford Station, it was dark

Yong Bao: Huh? Where is-

STH: Now!

Soon, lights came on, so did the tree, and thus the Steam 13 (Thomas, Edward, Henry, Gordon, James, Percy, Toby, Emily, Molly, Rosie, Stanley, Nia, and Rebecca), the Supportive 5 (Duck, Donald, Douglas, Oliver, and Belle), BoCo, Philip, Ryan, Daisy, Arthur, Sidney, Mavis, Sonny, and Salty were all present

Flying Scotsman: Whoa! This looks, amazing

Yong Bao: I say, they really decked the halls this time

Thomas: Well done Yong Bao, we heard you saved that Bowler Diesel

Gordon: Quite impressive

Yong Bao: Oh thank you

STH: Ladies and Gentlemen, and engines alike, we would like give three cheers to Yong Bao of China for his Hard Work helping us on Sodor and as well on the Mainland!

Flying Scotsman: Well, three cheers for our friend

All the engines blew their whistles, honked their horns, and Toby rang his bell

Yong Bao: Oh thank you all so much, you are the best friends I ever had

Molly: And we’ll be there to help you Yong Bao

Duck: So, how about we all celebrate this Christmas Party for you?

Yong Bao: I’m honored Duck

Narrator: And soon, everyone celebrated the Christmas party with their friend Yong Bao, it was truly was the best Christmas that Yong Bao has ever celebrated

Scene fades to black as Christmas Music played

MERRY CHRISTMAS

I hope you all enjoyed this Christmas Special

[tllgrrl]

Heart Beat: a SarahBucky Vampire AU - Chapter 3 - The Beautiful One is Here by @tllgrrl aka Nefertiri Jones

Relationship: Cardiologist!Vampire!Sarah Wilson/Vampire!James “Bucky” Barnes

Rated: M | TWs: Mention of blood; Assault.

* * * * * * * * * *

Summary: Losing a patient anywhere wasn’t easy.

Each doctor, nurse, EMT, had their own way of dealing with it.

Sarah would just walk with nowhere specific as to where.

This time, she had a where…

* * * * * * * * * *

About an hour later, Sarah made her way down to the morgue.

She offered to deliver the paperwork herself before heading back up to the lounge for a much-needed cup of hot coffee…minus an apple fritter.

She had to do…something. Walk. Run. Just go. Somewhere. She chalked it up to losing a patient in the Trauma Unit.

Losing a patient anywhere wasn’t easy. But…

(I knew him. No you didn’t. Don’t be silly.)

Along with the folder of forms and reports she carried the “belongings” bag containing the deceased’s clothing and shoes.

The EMTs had carefully removed his leather jacket and stabilized him before getting him into the ambulance, but because of the height of the fall, and that he was unconscious, unresponsive, and there was a fair amount of blood, they decided to go ahead and cut his shirts and everything else off of him so they could determine the extent of his injuries, unhindered by the clothes, and begin whatever treatment they needed to perform in transit to the awaiting hospital trauma unit.

In the elevator, on the way down to the bottom floor, Sarah’s mind replayed bits of conversation between the two of them.

“Sergeant, were you really fighting? Fighting on the roof?”

“I’m always fighting.”

And she wondered if he would’ve been upset that his jeans and shirts were ruined, but happy his leather jacket was spared.

She also had a smaller plastic bag containing a wallet, set of keys, what looked like a vintage Zippo lighter, a pair of old Army dog tags on a relatively newer chain, and a switchblade that the EMT found in a calf holster he was wearing when they cut his jeans off.

It wasn’t the first time she’d heard of or seen armed patients in the ER.

She’d also seen her fair share of dog tags, but not ones as old as these.

Maybe they were some sort of sentimental thing. Could’ve been his father’s or grandfather’s.

“Fighting who? Why?”

“Not now. There’s no time. Listen…”

It didn’t matter now. None of it mattered.

What did matter was, a) something had happened in the ER that it seemed only she heard or saw; and b) she wanted to see him one more time before the Coroners took him—took his body—away.

“Find me, Sarah. I’ll be waiting for you.”

No. She didn’t want to see him.

She needed to see him.

When she tapped her ID number into the keypad, the doors swung open, she entered the morgue, and the doors quietly shut behind her with a soft click.

The only (living) person she saw seemed to be one of the attendants, who was looking out the windows with his back to her.

It sounded like he was quietly talking to someone, but there was no one else there.

“The wrong one…the right one…is…here…”

The front desk area was lit with a couple of overhead fluorescents. The rest of the room was dark, except for the soft ambient light pouring through the windows that made up most of the back wall.

“Hello? Excuse me. I’m Dr. Wilson.

The patient, the decedent, they brought down from the ER about an hour ago, Sergeant James Barnes? I have his personal effects. And I need your signature on this paperwork for the…”

The man didn’t move, and now the only sound in the room was the rain on the windows.

It had started just a few minutes ago, and it was already pouring buckets.

“Wow. It’s really coming down,” she offered, putting the bag of clothing on the desk. Walking over to the windows she marveled at the stunning view as a flash of lightning lit up the City below them.

St. Francis Hospital was situated on a hill, so even some rooms on the bottommost floors afforded a spectacular view of San Francisco. This room was one of them.

The thunder rolled a few seconds later.

“Storm must be almost right on top of us. I feel for anybody out in the middle of all that,” she mused. “I love the rain, but—“

Then a bolt of lightning flashed so bright, and the crack of thunder following it so loud, it made her jump.

It flashed again and the overheads at the front desk flickered, then went out.

The streetlights, traffic signals, and all the buildings down in the streets below were dark now, too.

A whole swath of the city—and the morgue—had gone black.

“That’s not good,” she whispered to herself, after the accompanying thunder faded.

(…nine-Mississippi, eight-Mississippi, seven-Mississippi…)

Six seconds later, the hospital’s emergency generators kicked in.

The room was still dark, but the essential parts of the morgue—the refrigerators, autoclaves, and a couple of emergency lights—were running.

The lightning flashed again, and again thunder rolled right behind it.

“Mehr-see Bon-dyoo, as my grammaw would say. Thank God for modern—“

“You shouldn’t be here,” the man sighed.

Continued on AO3.

* * * * * * * * * * *

Chapter 4 - Safe aHouse, Pt. 1 - Well, How Did I Get Here?

Chapter 3 - The Beautiful One is Here

Chapter 2 - The Beautiful One is Coming, Pt. 2

Chapter 1 - The Beautiful One is Coming, Pt. 1

[xpuigc-bloc]

Horsehead Nebula (NIRCam image)

The NASA/ESA/CSA James Webb Space Telescope has captured the sharpest infrared images to date of one of the most distinctive objects in our skies, the Horsehead Nebula. These observations show a part of the iconic nebula in a whole new light, capturing its complexity with unprecedented spatial resolution.

Webb’s new images show part of the sky in the constellation Orion (The Hunter), in the western side of the Orion B molecular cloud. Rising from turbulent waves of dust and gas is the Horsehead Nebula, otherwise known as Barnard 33, which resides roughly 1300 light-years away.

The nebula formed from a collapsing interstellar cloud of material, and glows because it is illuminated by a nearby hot star. The gas clouds surrounding the Horsehead have already dissipated, but the jutting pillar is made of thick clumps of material that is harder to erode. Astronomers estimate that the Horsehead has about five million years left before it too disintegrates. Webb’s new view focuses on the illuminated edge of the top of the nebula’s distinctive dust and gas structure.

The Horsehead Nebula is a well-known photon-dominated region, or PDR. In such a region ultraviolet light from young, massive stars creates a mostly neutral, warm area of gas and dust between the fully ionised gas surrounding the massive stars and the clouds in which they are born. This ultraviolet radiation strongly influences the gas chemistry of these regions and acts as the most important source of heat.

These regions occur where interstellar gas is dense enough to remain neutral, but not dense enough to prevent the penetration of far-ultraviolet light from massive stars. The light emitted from such PDRs provides a unique tool to study the physical and chemical processes that drive the evolution of interstellar matter in our galaxy, and throughout the Universe from the early era of vigorous star formation to the present day.

Owing to its proximity and its nearly edge-on geometry, the Horsehead Nebula is an ideal target for astronomers to study the physical structures of PDRs and the evolution of the chemical characteristics of the gas and dust within their respective environments, and the transition regions between them. It is considered one of the best objects in the sky to study how radiation interacts with interstellar matter.

This image was captured with Webb’s NIRCam (Near-InfraRed Camera) instrument.

[Image description: At the bottom of the image a small portion of the Horsehead Nebula is seen close-in, as a curved wall of thick, smoky gas and dust. Above the nebula various distant stars and galaxies can be seen up to the top of the image. One star is very bright and large, with six long diffraction spikes that cross the image. The background fades from a dark red colour above the nebula to black.]

#Horsehead Nebula (NIRCam image)

#Credit:

#ESA/Webb, NASA, CSA, K. Misselt (University of Arizona) and A. Abergel (IAS/University Paris-Saclay, CNRS)

[awigglycultist]

Finally got some free time this week (well actually I did have free time before this but that was spent crying about my last day of school) so that finally means I finally get to watch VHS Christmas Carol just barely in time for the finale day of this week of Rewatchers2000! (it's still Sunday for me okay?)

I've said many times before but I absolutely love VHSCC and I always end up thinking about in the spring time, so this is definitely great

I love everyone coming through the audience

I love Fred's energy so much

Here's my man Bob Cratchit!!!

I love that the background turns all static when Scrooge is yelling at Bob

I love the way different characters react when passing by Scrooge during the "the crabbiest, scumbaggiest" bit. Like AJ ducks below him, James makes an angry face and like steps up to him and waves him away, and Jaime blocks her face.

The way Clark and AJ sound together during the transition song, especially on the "as the man begins to speeeaaakkk" bit ugghh omg they sound so good

Ugh Meredith as Jacob Marley hnggg

"these scary chains I wear" can't help but to make me laugh I little I'm sorry

I love how much cheering and screaming there is for Jaime through I'm The Ghost

Jaime's voice is so hnngngng aughfhf snhmfnfa ya know?

I'll never get over the Ghost of Xmas Past smoking a cigarette

Also I love the way she teases Scrooge during the transition song and That Scrooge

Speaking of That Scrooge HNNNG AUGHFHNANSDHDMR AOBSVDJDBFH HNGNGBG

Seriously they all sooo amazing

Ahh my man!! Ghost of Xmas Present!!

I love Scrooge trying to stop himself from dancing

I sure feel the Christmas electricity in this Chili's tonight

Shout out to AJ's little facial expressions during this bit

And we got some real cocain!

James' glasses and shoes lighting up and being the only things you can see in the dark is so fun

Also Scrooge is high let's goooo

Does anyone know what Brian says after "our tiny tin is getting heavier" bc I still have no clue

Oh boy Priceless time!!

God the disgusts on Emily's face Vs how happy and proud Bob looks is so funny

YEAH GO OFF EMILY CRATCHIT

You really can feel the love in this song

Haha among us

Big Chungus

Go off Ghost of Xmas Present

Ughh James' "BAH HUMBUUUUUUUG"

Final Ghost is such a bop

Jamie really does sound etherial

Scrooge you dummy you're the dead guy

I will never get I've over gay couple

Ugh the emotion in Joey's voice

Woo quick change

Ugh its so cool that they included Ali (and Britney in the preshow)

Once again saying it but the hug between Bob and Scrooge and Marley and Scrooge are so warm

How am I just now realizing that AJ And Corey don't come out during the bit where they all walk across the stage ("Scrooge was better, than his word" ect) and instead don't come back out until the "the meanest man there ever was" bit

Also shout out to the little boop on the nose Scrooge gives to Tiny Tim

Shout out to the person who yells "he's back!" when Brian comes out to bow

[asunsetgrace16]

☀︎ ▴ ｔｈｅ ｋｉｄｄｏｓ ▴ ☀︎

main masterlist ⎥ au masterlist ⎥ navigation

I felt it was necessary to more formally introduce you all to the offspring of the Fantilli clan and a little about how I imagine their lives to play out.

ᴛʜᴇᴏ ᴀᴅᴀᴍ ꜰᴀɴᴛɪʟʟɪ

Born: August 6, 2031

he has brown eyes and auburn blond hair

Theo has an easy smile and a kind heart, always wearing his heart on his sleeve

he is a protector, always looking out for his little siblings and standing up for kids. He also was always a natural born leader, even when he was little and playing with his siblings. It translated into his hockey

he inherited his dad and Uncle Adam's hockey skills, in addition to being quite the academic. He thrived in math and the sciences and quickly became a star center on the ice

he was torn between entering the OHL draft and college hockey, but in the end it was entirely his decision to make

Theo committed to Boston University to play on the Men's hockey team in 2048 and entered as a Biology major and a highly touted NHL prospect

at BU, he met Lana Thomas-Lu in their freshman year General Chemistry class. Theo's teammates went overboard with the chemistry puns after they got together

Theo went on to get drafted in the 2049 NHL draft, 2nd overall to the Calgary Flames, where he spent his entire 20-year career

Theo and Lana stayed together and got married in 2055

Theo and Lana have 3 kids - Lucy, Arabella, and James, and still reside in Calgary where Lana works as a Lab Tech and Theo joined the Flames organization as executive to the GM

ᴄᴏʟᴛᴏɴ ɢɪᴜʟɪᴀɴᴏ ꜰᴀɴᴛɪʟʟɪ

Born: September 19, 2033

he is 4 minutes and 56 seconds older than Caroline

he has light brown hair and his eyes are blue

Colton has the devilishly handsome looks and is more guarded than Theo

he has the most spunk out of his siblings, he thrives on adrenaline

he played hockey early on before transitioning into football, which earned him a scholarship to Yale and took a Sports Medicine degree

Colton played college football for 5 years before leaving the team to finish his degree, deciding not to enter the NFL draft. Instead, he turned his sights towards opening a sports medicine clinic

he quickly became known through the sports world, seeing dozens of professional athletes, including his big brother Theo and twin sister Caroline

he met his eventual wife Melanie as a kid, they were thick as thieves until high school when they grew apart. They rekindled their relationship at Yale, coincidentally, and have been together since sophomore year

they got married in 2060, and have made a home and built Colton's business in Toronto. Mel is a high school teacher for biology, chemistry, physics, and English

they have 4 kids- Mack, Jill, Alex, and Poppy

ᴄᴀʀᴏʟɪɴᴇ ɢʀᴀᴄᴇ ꜰᴀɴᴛɪʟʟɪ

Born: September 19, 2033

Caroline had dark brown hair and blue eyes

she has the same personality as Madelyn, but she is all Luca's athleticism

she is quiet, preferring reading to parties. She was a whiz in the classroom, graduating at the top of her class along with Colton, and Theo before them

Caroline is known as the gentle one of her siblings, kind and pure-hearted and sweet, a complete 180 from her on-ice fierceness

Caroline played hockey from the time she could walk, honing her skill with hours of practice with Theo, her dad, and Uncle Adam.

She committed to the University of Calgary Women's hockey team when she graduated high school, with aspirations of making the PWHL

she played for U of C for her freshman year in 2051-52, before signing with the Minnesota Frost, where she was drafted in 2052. She played for Minnesota for 8 years before being traded to Toronto in 2060 before free agency. She retired in 2068 after a shoulder injury

Caroline met Francisco "Cisco" Hernandez during her time in Minnesota. They met during her rookie year and got together in 2053. Cisco is a sergeant detective. They still live in Toronto

they got married in 2058, opting to elope with Theo and Lana as witnesses, and both of their parents were in attendance. They threw a party after getting back from their honeymoon

Caroline and Cisco decided to not have kids, instead being the doting aunt and uncle

ᴅᴀᴘʜɴᴇ ʜᴏᴘᴇ ꜰᴀɴᴛɪʟʟɪ

Born: July 2, 2037

she got Madelyn's red hair and Luca's brown eyes

Daphne is the most relaxed, go-with-the-flow of her family

she was also an athlete, playing high school volleyball and basketball and she was on the Track team in the 4 x 400m relay, 1500m, triple jump, long jump, and discus. She runs half-marathons regularly and has dreams of running the Boston Marathon

like her siblings, Daphne is a brilliant student, and the most all-around student of the four. She excelled in all her classes, and decided to pursue her passion for learning

her primary interests are around history and languages, with the majority of her books being historical fiction

she is a big foodie, always experimenting with fusion flavours and hosting dinner parties

Daphne plays the piano and has a beautiful singing voice

she met Jake in 2055 during her first year at Harvard. He was in his sophomore year of a business degree and they shared a music elective. They got together the following year

Daphne is now an accredited professor with PhD's in three different fields - History, Archeology, and Languages and Linguistics. She teaches 20th Century History at Harvard and Jake is an accountant

they adopted two kids, 3 year old Caleb in 2068 and 4 year old Jamie in 2070

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100 of my favorite non hip hop releases from 2022. I made a seperate list for hip hop already which you can find here if you’re interested. 2022 will go down as a memorable year for me not just for the sheer quantity of great releases, but also because i feel that all my of my favorite genres had a chance to shine. I started returning to my hardcore/punk/metal roots within the last couple years and 2022 was the first time in recent memory where I really felt like I was fully tapped in. There were so many highly anticipated releases from a ton of different artists last year, and the majority lived up to the hype for me. Grindcore, Mathcore, and Post-Hardcore seems to have been making a huge comeback with some incredible new efforts from modern genre staples like Wormrot, Callous Daoboys, Brutus, Greyhaven, Birds in row, Knoll, and Cloud Rat. Not to mention the much welcome return of some legendary acts including Gospel, Sawtooth Grin, and City of Caterpillar. I’m sure there’s plenty of stuff I missed out on too, so feel free to hit me with any recommendations you might have or just let me know what projects you enjoyed the most last year. Oh and you can also click the titles of any of these albums and it’ll take you to the bandcamp or spotify page where you can check them out if you’d like. Peace. Chart with album titles 1. Wormrot - Hiss 2. Alvvays - Blue Rev 3. Brutus - Unison Life 4. Cloud Rat - Threshold 5. Weyes Blood - And In The Darkness, Hearts Aglow 6. Gospel - The Loser 7. Natalia Lafourcade - De todas las flores 8. Massa Nera - Derramar | Querer | Borrar 9. Messa - Close 10. Soul Glo - Diaspora Problems 11. King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard - Omnium Gatherum 12. Cult of Luna - The Long Road North 13. tricot - Fudeki 14. White Ward - False Light 15. The Callous Daoboys - Celebrity Therapist 16. The Sawtooth Grin - Good. 17. Ultha - All That Has Never Been True 18. Joel Ross - The Parable Of The Poet 19. Autonoesis - Moon of Foul Magics 20. Knoll - Metempiric 21. Joyce Moreno - Natureza 22. Birds in Row - Gris Klein 23. Artificial Brain - Artificial Brain 24. Wake - Thought Form Descent 25. Tómarúm - Ash In Realms Of Stone Icons 26. Greyhaven - This Bright and Beautiful World 27. Sudan Archives - Natural Brown Prom Queen 28. Nilüfer Yanya - PAINLESS 29. Mary Halvorson - Amaryllis 30. Celeste - Assassine(s) 31. Naked Flames - Miracle in Transit 32. Elephant Gym - Dreams 33. Cave In - Heavy Pendulum 34. Silvana Estrada - Marchita 35. Tomas Fujiwara's Triple Double - March 36. Imperial Triumphant - Spirit Of Ecstasy 37. Blind Girls - The Weight of Everything 38. Chat Pile - God's Country 39. fleshwater - We're Not Here to Be Loved 40. Fievel Is Glauque - Flaming Swords

41. Melody's Echo Chamber - Emotional Eternal 42. NEPTUNIAN MAXIMALISM - Set Chaos To The Heart Of The Moon 43. King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard - Ice, Death, Planets, Lungs, Mushrooms and Lava 44. An Abstract Illusion - Woe 45. Sigh - SHIKI 46. City of Caterpillar - Mystic Sisters 47. Big Thief - Dragon New Warm Mountain I Believe In You 48. Conjurer - Páthos 49. Kali Malone - Living Torch 50. Krallice - Crystalline Exhaustion 51. Aeviterne - The Ailing Facade 52. Scarcity - Aveilut 53. The Comet Is Coming - Hyper-Dimensional Expansion Beam 54. Makaya McCraven - In These Times 55. Misþyrming - Með hamri 56. Loraine James - Building Something Beautiful For Me 57. Knxwledge. - 家​.​V1 58. Hylda - Juniper Pyre 59. Gillian Carter - Salvation Through Misery 60. Beach House - Once Twice Melody 61. Angles - A Muted Reality 62. Hatchie - Giving The World Away 63. Daniel Rossen - You Belong There 64. Pyrithe - Monuments to Impermanence 65. Otoboke beaver - SUPER CHAMPON 66. The Orielles - Tableau 67. Sunrise Patriot Motion - Black Fellflower Stream 68. Blut aus Nord - Disharmonium - Undreamable Abysses 69. Helpless - Caged In Gold 70. Immanuel Wilkins - The 7th Hand 71. Mizmor & Thou - Myopia 72. The Wind in the Trees - Architects of Light 73. Daniel Avery - Ultra Truth 74. Rolo Tomassi - Where Myth Becomes Memory 75. Show Me The Body - Trouble The Water 76. Sault - 11 77. Bríi - Corpos Transparentes 78. Sweet Pill - Where the Heart Is 79. Vein.FM - This World is Going to Ruin You 80. Ravyn Lenae - Hypnos 81. Disheveled Cuss - Into the Couch 82. Aoife Nessa Frances - Protector 83. Niechęć - Unsubscribe 84. Elder - Innate Passage 85. Raum - Daughter 86. Viagra Boys - Cave World 87. Chalk Hands - Don't Think About Death 88. Boris - fade 89. Nouns - WHILE OF UNSOUND MIND 90. ANNA SAGE - Anna Sage 91. Nu Genea - Bar Mediterraneo 92. JYOCHO - Let's Promise to Be Happy 93. Black Country, New Road - Ants From Up There 94. Waajeed - Memoirs of Hi-Tech Jazz 95. Petrol Girls - Baby 96. DIM - Steeped Sky, Stained Light 97. lilien rosarian - every flower in my garden 98. Work Money Death - Thought, Action, Reaction, Interaction 99. A.A. Williams - As The Moon Rests 100. Vital Spirit - Still as the Night, Cold as the Wind