#jackie and ryan imagine

[absentmindeduniverse]

I'm never getting tired of how you write Ben Barnes' characters especially the softies 🥰🥰🥰

Cute Alphabet : Ryan Brenner

Here are the answers to my cute alphabet for Ryan! Hope you like it, and thank you for requesting it :)

Afficher davantage

[nqueso-emergency]

I know they do this shit to get a rise and be "cool" or whatever tf they strive to be, but this shit is just uncalled for. Imagine Ryan commented on a Buddie edit and bucktommy fans said this shit to him. There's no reason for it. Block him. Move on. Stop watching the show. Just stop being so predictable and embarrassing.

These are responses to lou commenting on a post with a bucktommy edit. All he said was:

SO GOOD! Thank you Jackie!

These reactions are why actors start getting fed up with certain fans. It's also why people leave fandom because it's just so constant and overwhelming.

[companion-showdown]

Family Feud Nominations, Who is the Best Doctor Who Family

If I've missed a character out of one of the families let me know (within reason, I imagine all these families are massive in the EU, so prioritise tv or significant characters)

Currently, the only rule is no families may inculde anyone who is even ambiguously The Doctor, it'll get super complicated super fast imo

Any characters, eg River, who can link up multiple different families to create a single massive family unit will be treated on a case by case basis. If it is possible to pick one of the smaller family units that they are a part of to include them in while not including them in any of the others (in a way everyone will agree at least makes sense) they will be included in that family only, otherwise they will not be included

Please bare in mind when you are nominating that I am hoping to keep the number of nominations under 64 to run this as a mini-tournament. This is not a hard rule so if nominations do exceed 64 its not a big deal, just something I'd like everyone to bare in mind

Nominees

Foreman-Campbell (Susan, David, Alex)

Chesterton-Wright (Ian, Barbara, implied to be married after they leave)

McCrimmon (Jamie, Heather, V.M.McCrimmon, various others)

Waterfield (Victoria, Edward (father))

Lethbridge-Stewart (Kate, The Brigadier, Doris (Brig's wife in Battlefield), Archibald Hamish (TUAT), Gordon (Kate's son in Downtime), Kadiatu, The Great Intelligence, Lucy Wilson)

Grant/Jones (Jo, Cliff, Santiago (Jo's grandson in Death of the Doctor))

Smith (Sarah-Jane, Lavinia (aunt), Brendan Richards, Luke, Sky, Mr Smith, K9 (they are her family and I will not be hearing otherwise), Barbara, Eddie (parents in Temptation of Sarah-Jane Smith))

Leela, Andred, Veega, Rayo

Adric and Varsh (brothers)

Nyssa, Tremas, and Kassia (daughter, father, step-mother)

Jovanka (Tegan, Vanessa (aunt in Logopolis), Colin (cousin in Arc of Infinity))

Turlough (Vislor, Malkon (brother in Planet of Fire))

McShane (Ace, Audrey (mother), Kathleen (grandmother), Liam (brother))

Tyler (Rose, Jackie, Pete, Tony (baby mentioned in Journey's End), no I will not be adding the metacrisis to this list)

Another Smith (Mickey, Rita (grandmother))

Slitheen

Harkness (Jack, Grey, parents, Alice Carter (daughter), Steven Carter(grandson))

Isolas (Fear Her)

Jones (Martha, Francine, Clive, Tish, Leo, Leo has a baby as well, Adeola Oshodi)

The Family of Blood

Redfern-Smith (Joan, John (various), possible dream children and grandchildren)

Shafe Kanes (from Utopia, Kristane, Beltone)

Mott-Noble-Temple (Donna, Sylvia, Wilf, Shaun, Rose)

The Adipose

Pond-Williams (Amy, Rory, River, Brian, Anthony, Amy's aunt and parents)

Owens: (Craig, Sophie, Stormageddon Dark Lord of All)

Gillyflower (Mrs Gillyflower, Ada)

Paternoster (Jenny, Vastra, Strax)

Oswald (Clara, Ellie, Dave (parents), grandmother, and I'm going to say Danny makes the cut, Orson)

Potts (Bill, Mother, Moira (foster mother))

O'Brien-Sinclair (Graham, Ryan, Grace, Aaron (Ryan's father))

Khan (Yaz, Najia (mother), Hakim (father), Sonya (sister), Umbreen (grandmother))

Lewis (Dan, Eileen (mother), Neville (father))

Swarm and Azure

Bel, Vinder and their as yet unborn child

Sunday (Ruby, Carla, Cherry, many many foster siblings)

The TARDIS and Lolita

Little House of Cwej

The House of Lungbarrow (Grandfater Paradox, Qenceus, Inocet, various cousins, Irving Braxiatel, Maggie Matsumoto, Ulysses, Penelope GAte, Anna Joyce)

The House of Dvora (Morbius, The War King, Thessalia, Romana, various others)

Langer (Clyde, Carla (mother), Paul (father))

Jackson (Maria, Alan, Chrissie)

Chandra (Rani, Haresh, Gita)

The Wu Diaspora (Cindy Wu and her clones)

Munmeth and Mutmunna (Medicine Man)

Ada and Alice Obiefune

Who (Susan, Barbara, Louise)

Jones-Davies (Ianto, Rhiannon, Johnny, David, Mica)

Summerfield (Bernice, Issac, Claire, Jason Kane, Peter, Wolsey, Keith, Rebecca, Cousin Eliza, Benedict I-IV, Christine)

Miller (Lucie, Pat (aunt))

Schofield (Hex, Cassie, Hilda)

House of Witforge (Narvin, Lenaris, Helico, Narvin's father, Rexin)

Faction Paradox

Pollard (Charley, Louisa, Richard, Margaret, Edward Grove, The Sound Creature)

Mesh Cos, Lon Shel, Julian White Mammoth Tusk

Cooper-Williams (Gwen, Rhys, Anwen, Geraint, Mary (Gwen's parents))

Chenka (Liv, Tula, Kal, Garlon Rosh)

Sinclair (Helen, Albie, Trev Bailey)

Forrester

Proctor (Cleo, Jordan, parents)

Nominations will be open until Midday Friday (03/05, 12:00 BST (GMT/UTC +1)), I will try and give a more specific time then

[khruschevshoe]

It's so funny to me that Chris Chibnall wrote both Cyberwoman and the Timeless Children because it shows that at one point he DID understand the horror of the Cybermen- that they were formerly people, that they are what's left of a person that is no longer there, that they are a corpse puppeted by a machine, that there is a human component at the center and the horror comes from seeing your former loved one scooped out and your hope forever being cursed to a futile one...to nameless extra Time Lords being made into basically robots except they can regenerate this time. Like, what the hell happened? Did he just spend so long thinking about the Timeless Children plot twist that he just fundamentally misunderstood why the Cybermen are terrifying or how they can be used to add to the tragedy of the plot?

Tell me what fundamentally changes if you make the Cybermen in Haunting of Villa Diodati/Ascension/Timeless Children basic robotic killing machines. Hell, what changes if you make them Daleks? Not once did they seek to convert the Doctor/her allies. If anything, their suits were just used as disguises.

Imagine if during the disguise part of the story the suits had come alive and started converting the team or hell, outright converted one of them. Imagine if they had to deal with the horror of that. Imagine if THAT is what caused Ryan/Graham to realize they didn't want to travel with the Doctor anymore. Hell, you could save them at the last moment if you want and leave them shaken up, just have them experience SOME true horror/fear. If Rise of the Cybermen/Age of Steel could do that with Jackie Tyler and Cyberwoman could do that with Lisa Hallett in a bone-chiling manner, you could do that with your team. I get if you were trying not to turn your third black companion in a row into a Cyberman, but in that case either sacrifice Graham or Yaz or don't do them at all if you're not going to use them for their express purpose/mechanic within the story.

[enbylestat]

Wicked - Gregory Maguire novel characters as they are in my head (Tidings of comfort & joy - dramatis personae)

Elphaba Thropp (and Liir Thropp) - Jackie Burns or Cynthia Erivo 

Sarima Tigelaar  (and her three children) - Zendaya Coleman 

Fiyero Tigelaar - Avan Jogia or Ryan Reid

Lady/her Ozness Majesty Glinda Upland-Chuffrey of the Arduennas Upper Uplands (does not feature prominently in this fic, she is a POV for Elphaba’s time at Shiz as she is in the book, she is a past relationship of Elphaba’s a tragic figure, a mean albeit nuanced lesbian… she survives this world and this fic, but she is still complicit with the Wizard in this universe despite very much also loving Elphaba and being married to Lord Chuffrey for money) - Renée Rapp, Amanda Jane Cooper, Ariana Grande-Butera in the WICKED: part one movie, even a young Billy Burke will suffice for imagining. 

[stedefxckingbonnet]

requests info/intro!

hi, everyone!

i thought i'd take a quick second to introduce myself and to also formally open up requests. i'm already working on a few things, but requests really do always help and feel free to submit them at any point--but, we'll get to all of that in a moment!

my name is lavinia, and i am a uni student studying both theatre (dramaturgy specifically) and creative writing! i love to sing, act, write (obviously haha), read (i am a huge fan of classic literature, as well as donna tartt, mona awad, sally rooney, elif bautman, and ottessa moshfegh's works), go to concerts, go to the movies, style/design clothing, paint, collect records/cds, and so much more! this barely scratches the surface really but, if any of you share these interests, always feel free to reach out!

anyhow, as i said, i will officially be opening requests, and at the moment here is the media and the characters i will write for:

Our Flag Means Death

Izzy Hands (my BELOVED)

Ed Teach

Stede Bonnet

Lucius Spriggs

Jim Jimenez

Oluwande

Mary Bonnet

(more available upon request! these were just sort of my first instincts.)

Gilmore Girls

honestly, i'm pretty open to anything unless it's dean. just request and i'll see what i can do!

Gossip Girl

Blair Waldorf

Serena Van der Woodsen

Dan Humphrey

Nate Archibald

Chuck Bass (like sometimes)

Rufus Humphrey

more available upon request.

The Fosters/The Good Trouble

Callie Adams Foster

Mariana Adams Foster

Brandon Foster

Jamie Hunter

Gael Martinez

Dennis Cooper

Malika Williams

more available upon request.

Select Wes Anderson and Tim Burton characters. just ask!

Enola Holmes

Enola Holmes

Tewkesbury

Sherlock Holmes

Little Women (2019)

Jo March

Amy March

Beth March

Meg March

Laurie

Friedrich Bhaer

Star Wars

Obi-Wan Kenobi

Anakin Skywalker

Padmé Amidala

Luke Skywalker

Han Solo

Leia Organa

Kylo Ren

Finn

Poe Dameron

Ahsoka Tano

more available upon request!

Pride & Prejudice (2005)

Basically me just saying I'll write Mr. Darcy. but more characters available upon request, of course.

Community

Abed Nadir

Troy Barnes

Annie Edison

Jeff and Britta I'm a little iffy on but with the right request, maybe. don't hesitate to ask!

The OC

Seth Cohen

Ryan Atwood

Summer Roberts

Marissa Cooper

The Umbrella Academy

Klaus

Viktor

Ben

Five

Diego

Allison

Luther is like, not preferred for me but if you feel strongly about him and have a good request, i’ll consider it but don’t get your hopes up too high!

Once Upon a Time

Emma Swan

Regina Mills

Killian Jones

Neal Cassidy

August Booth

Jefferson (The Mad Hatter)

Mulan

Ruby Lucas (Red Riding Hood)

Belle French

Mary Margaret Blanchard (Snow White)

David Nolan (Prince Charming)

Peter Pan

Robin Hood

Any others, feel free to ask! I know I left Mr. Gold (Rumple) off, but that's only because it depends with each request. Also, please specify if you want it to take place in Storybrooke pre or post curse, or in The Enchanted Forest.

Merlin

Merlin

Arthur

Gwen

Morgana

Nimueh

Lancelot

any others, feel free to ask. i am just starting S2, keep that in mind.

The Holdovers

Angus Tully

Dead Poets Society

Todd Anderson

Neil Perry

Knox Overstreet

Charlie Dalton

Steven Meeks

Love Lies Bleeding

Lou Langston

Jackie Cleaver

i'll just start there for now, as honestly it's been a bit since i've written an x reader and i don't want to overwhelm myself much! but please, feel free to request at any time! I will update this frequently, as I am always either getting into new things or remembering things I already love. I am mostly dedicated to OFMD right now, but you may also leave requests for other fandoms and I will keep them on file, or who knows, perhaps even get to them sooner than you may imagine! Have a wonderful day (or night!), and don't forget to request!

yours truly,

lavinia

me filing through all of your requests (hopefully!)

[found-family-tournament]

Found Family Tournament Round 2 Part 9 Group 41

Propaganda and further images under the cut

New Who Crew: 9th Doctor, Rose, Jack (& Mickey & Jackie)

13 and the Gang: 13th Doctor, Yasmin, Graham, Ryan

New Who Crew:

Need I say more than the "buy me a drink/but I'm worth it" scene?

13 and the Gang:

God if it wasn't 6am I would gush about this ad infinitum, just imagine hyper fixation and incoherent gushing for the next hour for me k

[youvereachedthebadend]

Sometimes telling people with different bodies apart is hard enough, it makes sense that telling apart people who share a body would be harder

Jameson nods. I remember when I first met everyone, I had that exact same problem.

"Yeah, I think we used to look more alike than we do now," Chase agrees. "I mean, obviously JJ always had his mustache, and Hen usually wore his glasses, but not always! And other than that, we really did look like clones or something."

Jackie nods thoughtfully. "We're pretty different now... even without all our scars, I think."

The guys go silent for a while, reflecting on things. Then Jack comes out from the bathroom, now wearing a slightly different outfit. "You guys are quiet," he says. "Did I kill the mood?"

"No, it was not you, Jack," Schneep says. "We were just thinking about how things have changed. They have changed quite a lot, even for me."

"Yeah... tell me about it." Jack's white crutches are leaning against the corner. He exchanges them for Anti's black ones. "Never imagined I'd have another person in my head, much less that it'd be Anti. But he's really different now. It's weird." He pauses. "Well... you guys are playing Mario Party? Can I get in on this?"

Chase laughs. "Yeah, sure, if Jackie's not too salty to start another round."

"I'll show you guys this time!" Jackie says, and the group laughs.

They start another game up, and not long after, Stacy and the kids return home. "Dad!" Delilah shouts, running over and jumping onto Chase's lap.

"Oof! Hey!" Chase laughs. "You're getting a bit big for that!" He looks over. "Hey, Stace."

"Hey," Stacy says. "Can any of you guys help with the groceries? They're piled in the rental car." She has two bags in her hands. Next to her, Ryan is standing with one bag wrapped in his little arms, looking very serious.

I'll help, Stacy, I'm not busy, Jameson says.

"Thanks, JJ. Marvin's not back yet?"

No, but I got a text from him. He's on his way.

[thestarrystarpets]

An amazing 1st Day of School!

🌟 Sierra’s First Day of School Adventure

Sierra woke up with a flutter of excitement. The sun peeked through her curtains, casting a warm glow on her Dazzling girl room. She stretched, her two pet fish—Starr and Comet—swimming happily in their tank by the window. Today was the day—the first day of school!

🎵 Choir with Mrs. Rios

Sierra’s heart raced as she entered the choir room. Mrs. Rios, the music teacher, stood at the front, her baton poised. Sierra loved to sing, and she hoped to hit all the high notes. The room echoed with harmonies as they practiced a lively tune about friendship and adventure.

📚 Reading Class and New Friends

Next was reading class. Sierra took her seat, glancing around the room. Two new faces caught her eye: Samantha and Millan. Samantha had curly hair and a bright smile, while Millan wore glasses and carried a stack of books. They exchanged introductions, bonding over their love for stories. Mrs. Ryan, their reading teacher, welcomed them all with enthusiasm.

🎉 First Day Assembly: Level Up!

The entire school gathered in the auditorium for the First Day of School assembly. Ms. Jackie, the spirited school administrator, took the stage. “Welcome, students!” she exclaimed. “Our theme this year is ‘Level Up.’ Let’s make it the best year yet!” Sierra clapped along, feeling the energy surge through the crowd.

📖 Bible Class with Mr. Readon

In Bible class, Mr. Readon—a tall man with a twinkle in his eye—introduced himself. “It’s not Mr., It’s not Sir,” he said, grinning. “It’s Mr. Readon.” Sierra chuckled, liking his playful spirit. They discussed ancient stories and moral lessons, and Sierra found herself intrigued.

➗ Math, Lunchtime, and PE

Math class followed, where Sierra tackled equations and fractions. At lunch, she sat with Samantha, Millan, and other new friends. They shared sandwiches and secrets, forming a bond that felt like magic. Then came PE—a whirlwind of dodgeball, jump ropes, and laughter. Sierra discovered the joy of exercising and felt her energy soar.

🇺🇸 US History with Mrs. Maynard

Mrs. Maynard, the history teacher, had a passion for the past. She painted vivid pictures of explorers, wars, and revolutions. Sierra scribbled notes, eager to learn. And when the bell rang, she hurried to Earth Science with Mr. Waters—a quirky teacher who made geology fascinating.

🚁 Thunderbirds Are Go and Starie the Cat

As the day wound down, Sierra’s thoughts turned to her favorite show, Thunderbirds Are Go. She imagined daring rescues, International Rescue missions, and the Tracy brothers piloting their Thunderbird crafts. Later, she sat cross-legged on her bed, talking to her Starpet, Starie the Cat. Starie purred, listening intently as Sierra recounted her day.

[ryajada]

AWINJA NYAMWALO ON "DISCO MATANGA"

by RYAN BROWN Jackie Vike a.k.a Awinja Nyamwalo has shocked nitizens by producing a drama series movie called Disco Matanga. Jackie Vike a.k.a Awinja .PHOTO ©️ bizna Kenya Disco Matanga is a web series that revolves around Awinja and the death of her brother Izianunu. After dying under mysterious circumstances, burying the self-proclaimed M-Coasti proves to be harder than imagined. What…

[anthonysstupiddailyblog]

Anthony's Stupid Daily Blog (720): Thu 8th Mar 2024

I thought about how I always try to combine two or more ideas whenever I get a tattoo in order to get more original and unique imagery and I have decided apply this logic to a new business enterprise as I set up my own mobile museum. Instead of getting people to come to my museum I will take it to them as I will be driving the bus Rosa Parks would be arrested on and inside rather than spreading out all of the exhibits I will have them collected into one piece. It will be The Elephant Man’s skeleton wearing Jackie Kennedy’s blood stained dress, holding one of the violins the musicians on the Titanic was playing, in the other hand he'll be carrying the headless bat that Ozzy Osbourne bit the head off and on his feet will be the ruby slippers from The Wizard of Oz. Tell me you wouldn't pay money to hop on the mobile museum to check it out if it drove into your town. After four very long years I have finally finished my gruelling but also incredibly pleasurable challenge to read every book to win the Edgar Award for Best Novel. I don’t know how I found out about these awards (though I suspect it was just through randomly trawling through Wikipedia) or why I decided to read every winning book but when I sat down to read the first winner “Beat Not The Bones” by Charlotte Jay I couldn’t imagine I wouldn’t finish the challenge until four years later. After nearly half a decade of this on again off again mission, at approximately 16:00 today I finished the final book in the challenge, Notes on an Execution. The final pages of the book depict the last moments of a murderer on death row as he sees the world slip away much like I was watching the final moments of my beautiful four year long task disintegrate before my eyes like a swan in a barrel of acid. I immediately took out my bucket list and struck a line through “Edgar Awards” and breathed a huge sigh of relief before stepping outside to do several interviews with the big news networks and watching all the video messages of congratulations from celebrities such as Lee Ryan from Blue, Justin Lee Collins and The Pope. I’m so glad that this thing is over but at the same time I’m thankful that I’ve been introduced to a lot of amazing writers whose work I never would have gotten to sample if it weren’t for this insane challenge. Starting tomorrow I will begin my new insane challenge of attempting to read every book by the great Philip K Dick.

I watched an episode of The One Show that covered a book award ceremony for children who had written stories made up of 500 words or less. I don't know why but I hate seeing children display talent at an incredibly young age. It's probably because when I was a child I submitted a story for this competition about a nymphomaniac bank manager who constantly takes customers into the bank's giant vault to bang them which I titled "Safe Sex" and not only did it not win but I was forced to undergo counseling and electroshock treatment. One of the winners was this eleven year old kid and he was a right smug little cunt. When the host asked him if he could believe he won he replied in a deadpan fashion “Well yeah because you just said it” and when Alex Jones asked if he would continue writing he said “Well I’m currently writing three stories”. This self-congratulatory bitch is going to end up being the Prime Minister one day isn't he? In twenty years time when I get my well earned OBE for all the great sitcoms I write it's going to be this smarmy gobshite who ruins my day by giving me my medal and commenting "I've never seen your stuff personally but I'm told it's very funny".Tom Hiddleston presented an award but he didn’t do his Robert De Niro impression. I actually want to write a Philip K Dick-style book where Hiddleston runs for president and his only act is to make it punishable by death to watch, share or discuss his De Niro impression ever happened.

[qnewsau]

Man finds sister's fiancé on Grindr, confronts her on radio

New Post has been published on https://qnews.com.au/man-finds-sisters-fiance-on-grindr-confronts-her-on-radio/

Man finds sister's fiancé on Grindr, confronts her on radio

A bride-to-be was left in tears on national radio when her stepbrother called into the Kyle and Jackie O Show to inform her he’d seen her fiancé’s photo on Grindr.

The 25-year-old gay man, Ryan, rang into the Sydney shock jocks Kyle Sandilands and Jackie O for their wedding-themed segment “Final Objection”.

In the wildly tacky segment, the man explained his objection: he was scrolling through Grindr at Christmas and “just came across pictures of Mark’s face”.

“He was throwing off a few gay vibes at Christmas,” Ryan also claimed.

After inquiring about the fiancé’s hotness, Kyle and Jackie O then called Chloe so Ryan could drop this information on his unsuspecting sibling about her partner of four years.

“I honestly don’t know what to say. Is this a prank? Are you guys pranking me?” the shocked bride-to-be replied.

Kyle interjected, suggesting it was possible someone used Mark’s photos in a “catfishing” situation.

Ryan disagreed, replying, “Honestly, I just have a gut feeling about this, Chloe. I think you should ask him next time you see him.”

During the segment, Ryan sent a screenshot of the Grindr profile to Chloe for her to see for herself.

“That’s definitely him. It’s kind of grainy but you can still see that it’s him,” she said.

“It looks pretty recent, since he’s gotten really fit, for sure.”

As the bride-to-be became noticeably distressed, the radio hosts tried to reassure her. Kyle told the bride somebody put up his photos on Grindr as a joke.

“Someone put my picture on there, and they called me ‘Big Gold Mike’. It was so popular,” he said.

“It was a real confidence boost because I thought if things don’t work out with chicks, I can start smashing a__e.

“Can you imagine me walking down Oxford Street with a little twink under each arm?”

Kyle and Jackie O also urged Chloe to ask her fiancé for an explanation, but Kyle added, “If he was gay, would you have a problem if your brother started dating him?”

  View this post on Instagram

  A post shared by Kyle and Jackie O (@kyleandjackieo)

Kyle Sandilands breached decency standards with mpox rant

In August, Australia’s broadcasting watchdog ACMA ruled that Kyle Sandilands breached broadcasting decency standards with a vile homophobic rant about mpox (formerly monkeypox).

ACMA said that even by Kyle and Jackie O Show standards, the segment was “overly disparaging and insulting”.

Kyle’s then-employer ARN defended the shock jock at the time as “renowned for his colourful vernacular.”

“We appreciate that those unaccustomed to his expressions may consider the content opinionated, and the range of topics discussed on the show are not to everyone’s taste,” the radio station said.

Read also:

Gay guy asks Kyle and Jackie O for advice after finding homophobic dad on Grindr

Secret Alan Jones recordings before Kyle & Jackie O walkout

Donald Trump Jr slammed for transphobic Kyle and Jackie O show interview

Best man proposes to bride’s married father at wild Mackay wedding

For the latest LGBTIQA+ Sister Girl and Brother Boy news, entertainment, community stories in Australia, visit qnews.com.au. Check out our latest magazines or find us on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and YouTube.

[laresearchette]

Friday, June 30, 2023 Canadian TV Listings (Times Eastern)

NEW TO AMAZON PRIME CANADA/CBC GEM/CRAVE TV/DISNEY + STAR/NETFLIX CANADA:

AMAZON PRIME CANADA JACK RYAN (Season 4) MY MAN IS CUPID SHOOTING STARS

CRAVE TV BEAST (2022) COMING HOME INFINITY POOL REQUIEM FOR A DREAM ROOM THE WEAPON

DISNEY + STAR 548 DAYS (548 Dias) (Season 1, all episodes) WILD LIFE

NETFLIX CANADA ALONE (Season 9) IS IT CAKE, TOO?! NIMONA TAYO THE LITTLE BUS (Season 5)

MLB BASEBALL (SN1) 2:00pm: Guardians vs. Cubs (SN) 7:00pm: Red Sox vs. Jays (SN1) 8:00pm: Yankee vs. Cardinals (SN Now) 10:00pm: Rays vs. Mariners

CFL FOOTBALL (TSN/TSN4/TSN5) 7:30pm: Elks vs. Redblacks

MICHIF COUNTRY (APTN) 8:30pm (SEASON FINALE): Indigenous comedian Paul Rabliauskas goes out on frozen Lake Manitoba with Métis fishermen Rene Coutu, Ryan Cavan and Norbert Langelier; they put Paul to work and he experiences his first Bombardier fish fry.

CROSS COUNTRY CAKE OFF (CTV) 9:00pm (SEASON FINALE): Six cake makers face off for the ultimate title in the national Spring finale; the competitors must bake a cake paying homage to somewhere they love; a fantastical marriage of skill and imagination to determine who will be named the champion.

THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF MELBOURNE (Slice) 9:00pm: Janet and Kyla put aside their tensions as Jackie confides in the ladies about her marriage.

BEAST (Crave) 9:00pm: A recently widowed man and his two teenage daughters travel to a game reserve in South Africa. However, their journey of healing soon turns into a fight for survival when a bloodthirsty lion starts to stalk them.

DRAG RACE FRANCE (Crave 2) 10:10pm (SEASON PREMIERE): Ten drag queens compete to be the French drag superstar.

[campbluelake]

And the world is spinning, and she keeps on winning | ████ 3.6 | Re: Yall

She isn’t sure how to feel about this. So much is happening in her head. Hibiki’s words are ignored because she knows she’d try to attack the man for talking shit about her dads right now. Of course there is relief with Saya no longer threatening to end their friendship. Jacky-Bobby gives her pause. Was that the problem all this time? She didn’t like herself? Abbie tact on that maybe if she can’t like herself then she should have confidence in her friends. As it looks despite everything she still has some people on her side, as long as she accepts responsibility with a little more grace from here on out at least. 

Then Yua. He wants an explanation.

“You… You want to know about them…?”

With her free hand she nervously strokes one off her pigtails. 

“… I guess it doesn’t matter if you all know, huh? I can’t imagine what I can say now can make you all hate me any more than you already." 

Plus if she’s dying it’s not like they can take her in, right? Haha. 

"Um. Okay." 

Mason’s arm gets squeezed for a moment, for support. She still doesn’t let him go. He’s very needed right now. 

"My first kill was in my freshman year of high school. A girl named Ryan Bishops. I, uh, I was her ‘friend.’ I was a weirdo, her weirdo as she liked to call me. We called each other friends but really she was my bully who just let me sit with her and her friends at lunch. No one was allowed to push me around because only Ryan had the benefit to… I hated her. I hated her so much but I was so desperate I didn’t do anything about it. It was Halloween and she called me to meet her at this shut down theme park near town. When I got there this… This masked clown person showed up with a bat and started chasing me around the place, swinging their bat, trying to hit me. I fought back in the funhouse… Of course it was Ryan pulling a prank. While she was on the floor laughing at me I… I just…” For a moment her eyes look far away, staring at the fire. “I just didn’t think. I think I snapped. I remember grabbing the bat and just… I kept hitting her until she stopped screaming… I walked to a payphone and called my dads. They took care of it." 

"In my sophomore year, a different school, I did make a nicer friend. Dani Alamilla. She was real sweet and soft and I thought we were really good friends because it seemed like maybe we were outcasts together, y'know? Well… There was this big house party and I wasn’t invited. She wasn’t either, so she said. The night of the party I was really bored so I snuck out and decided to check it out anyways. I peek through the window and I see… Dani. Hanging out with people. Having fun. Smiling. I was furious. I called her the next day and demanded answers. We met up at the local park at night and she just confessed that she was lying. She had this whole social life she was keeping away from me because… I don’t know. Something about not wanting to hurt my feelings. I was so angry and I pushed her. Well… The park had these concrete stairs. When I pushed her she… She didn’t survive the fall. I think that’s when I started to notice that there was something really wrong with me because… I didn’t feel bad? I didn’t. Ran home and dads took care of it again." 

She finally seems to snap back, her face grimaces a little. The next one makes her feel a little sick. 

"New school. Junior year. I met this girl… Io Hunt. We met and we clicked instantly. We started dating and it was 24/7 honeymoon feelings. Months and months, nonstop. I loved her as much as a dumb 17 year old could. I thought we were soulmates. We told each other everything. I thought we were going to be together forever. So naturally I didn’t want secrets. I told her about my dads, about Ryan and Dani… She seemed fine at first but… She snubbed me for like two weeks until she invited me over finally. I was so worried because I thought she was going to break up with me. When I got there… Well. She stabbed me." 

Her hand subconsciously rubs a spot besides her lower stomach, feeling a fleshy line. 

"She tried to kill me. I think I told someone here that you should never bring a weapon to a fight unless you really know how to use it. Io was many things but a proficient knife fighter was not one of them. We fought and I was able to finish what she started. Somehow I was able to sneak back, bleeding like a pig… Dad went to clean up while papa stayed home to tend to me. He was *sooo* scared. So scared I was going to die." 

And now look at her. Half way in the grave. 

"After Io went missing her dad came by and accused me of having something to do with it. He never liked me. I think he knew something was wrong with me. Dad wanted to get rid of him but Papa just packed our stuff and we left again.

And the last one. Um. I will admit this one wasn’t really my proudest moment. Shiloh was pure revenge and nothing else. Petty. In my senior year I was able to perfect being a pretty girl next door. It was me but just more, y'know? I got into the popular group, joined the cheer squad, and met Shiloh Tinamou. Head bitch. We hated each other the moment we locked eyes. It was just one of those things where you knew you wouldn’t get along. It was social war between us. Half way through the school year Shiloh was basically destroying my good name. Talking behind my back, rumors, turning my friends against me. One day I had everything I wanted and next I was basically a social outcast. He had fully destroyed my reputation. He made my life a living hell… School ended and everyone went off to college or whatever. I didn’t. I became obsessed thinking about how much I hated that guy. I wanted to kill him so bad but he left for school. It was only pure luck that we didn’t move yet and I got a job at a clothing store. I was 20 years old when Shiloh walked through the door. He was back from school on break and he remembered me. Of course he was still a huge bitch. I clocked off and tailed him around the mall. I learned he was having a party… That’s when I decided to kill him." 

Again, Mason’s arm is squeezed. 

"I grabbed a change of clothes, an axe from the garage, and drove to Shiloh’s house. I stayed there all night. I counted every person who came in and every person who came out. It was morning when Shiloh was alone… I went inside. I chased him around his house. I killed him. When I called my dads for help they were sooooo mad. I had never seen them so angry before. This was petty, this was needless. It didn’t have to happen… They were even more mad because they couldn’t clean up everything up in time. It was huge news. A house full of holes and blood and no body… We moved to Florida after that and I started going to fashion school." 

And as she said before. She was doing so good. She hadn’t killed anyone since. Now Warrick.

”… I guess now you can all judge me fully. I have no more skeletons.“ 

[warningsine]

Yellowjackets exists as part of a larger wave of modern media exploring cannibalism, which has been described as “mankind’s oldest taboo.” Discarding slightly less recent examples like Julia Ducournau’s Raw or Bryan Fuller’s Hannibal, or even zombie-adjacent takes like Victor Fresco’s Santa Clarita Diet, last year saw the premiere of Yellowjackets alongside the release of Ryan Murphy’s Dahmer, Luca Guadagnino’s Bones and All, Mimi Cave’s Fresh, and the House of Hammer documentary.

Of course, there have always been stories about cannibalism. The subject holds a macabre fascination. After all, multiple actors have played the charismatic cannibal Doctor Hannibal Lecter. Like most primal fears, cannibalism is not a single easy-to-explain horror. The general public’s fascination with (and anxiety around) cannibalism can be rooted in different (and even mutually exclusive) things, depending on the context.

During the 1970s, it was tied to worries about consumer culture. Soylent Green imagined a world where humans were raw material to be processed into food, while the flesh-craving zombies of Dawn of the Dead were drawn to the mall. These stories can also be about the fear that human beings are ultimately just animals — predators and prey, monsters and meat. “It’s only cannibalism if we’re equals,” boasts Hannibal (Mads Mikkelsen).

These fears haunt the modern wave of cannibal culture. In Fresh, Brendan (Sebastian Stan) seduces young women so that he can harvest their meat to sell to an exclusive clientele. In Santa Clarita Diet, Sheila Hammond (Drew Barrymore) is a real estate agent before she transforms into a flesh-hungry monster. The girls of Yellowjacket descend into animalistic anarchy. Characters in both Yellowjackets and Hannibal are haunted by the Wendigo, a beast cursed with a craving for human flesh.

However, there’s something even more unsettling at play in these more recent entries in the genre. “Because ultimately, the show is not about if cannibalism, it’s about why cannibalism, and how cannibalism,” Lisco explained of Yellowjackets. “But it may not be just because of scarcity. It may be because of something much more complex: the new micro-society that they need to build, and the rules that they need to form to survive. Not just physically, but psychologically and mentally.”

In these more recent cannibal stories, the act of consumption is presented as an act of intimacy. In Fresh, Brendan meets his victims through the dating scene. Dahmer is fixated on the killer’s cannibalistic tendencies and his psychosexual desires. The title of Bones and All refers to an intensely intimate act of communion between the movie’s two lovers (Taylor Russell and Timothée Chalamet), in which one completely consumes the other. House of Hammer explores the intersection of Armie Hammer’s cannibalistic fantasies and accusations of sexual abuse.

Hannibal is about the title character’s desire to consume Will Graham (Hugh Dancy), physically and emotionally. “If you love someone fully the most extreme you can go with that is to digest them and make them be part of you,” Mikkelsen stated of his take on the iconic character. “It’s a super selfish thing, but it’s a big part of cannibalism. For that reason he wants to possess Will.” These are tales of monstrous desire. It seems notable that much of this wave comes from women and queer creators.

“Cannibalism is the consumption of someone else,” argues Mary Wild, “so, as a Freudian psychoanalyst, I see that as a longing for intimacy, a longing for psychological or emotional closeness, that is actually taking the form of a physical reunion or keeping that person as close to you as possible.” Yellowjackets co-creator Bart Nickerson wonders, “What portion of our revulsion to these things is a fear of the ecstasy of them?”

This fear plays out in Yellowjackets. Shauna’s consumption of Jackie is not merely a physical act. Shauna was having an affair with Jackie’s boyfriend, Jeff (Jack DePew). “You know Jeff only had sex with you because I made you into someone else,” Shauna’s imaginary version of Jackie explains. “And you only had sex with him so you could imagine being me.” Ingesting Jackie is a literal manifestation of that idea, allowing Shauna to absorb Jackie into herself.

Yellowjackets cements this association by cutting the sequence in which the snow falls on the pyre, and in which Jackie’s body is transformed into meat for consumption, against a sequence in which Nat (Sophie Thatcher) and Travis (Kevin Alves) have sex inside the cabin. It creates an equivalence between the two acts. In its own sick and perverse way, the act of consuming another person is the ultimate act of intimacy — to taste, to possess, to devour.

It isn’t a surprise that modern pop culture has been drawn to this particular reading of cannibalism. After all, spitting was the hottest pop culture trend of 2021, in the wake of a global pandemic caused by a virus that required people to stand six feet apart and spread primarily through oral secretions. Sex and intimacy have always been prime fodder for horror, particularly for queer communities during the AIDS crisis. However, that was especially and universally true in the era of COVID.

It has been suggested that the pandemic changed the way that a generation understands intimacy. Reportedly, half of young single Americans were not physically intimate with anyone during the pandemic’s first year, with two-thirds stating their preference for virtual rather than physical intimacy even afterwards. However, this may also just be part of a larger trend, with experts noting physical intimacy was already in a general decline among younger people.

After all, cannibalism as a monstrous metaphor for physical intimacy is hardly new. The current trend arguably dates back to Karyn Kusama’s Jennifer’s Body, a film that has undergone something of a deserved critical reappraisal in recent years. In fact, Kusama directed that first episode of Yellowjackets, cementing the connection. Still, the trend towards cannibalism-as-monstrous-intimacy only accelerated during the pandemic.

Even outside of cannibalism, physical and emotional intimacy is a recurring preoccupation for Yellowjackets. Characters are constantly lying to one another and pretending to be things that they are not. Travis sleeps with Nat after giving up hope of finding his lost younger brother Javi (Luciano Leroux). He only does that because Nat stole some of Javi’s clothes and covered them in blood as a way to convince Travis to let go of his search. At their most intimate, Travis knows nothing about Nat.

Rejoining the cast as adults, the show stresses how difficult it is to ever fully know somebody and how complicated trust can be. As an adult, Shauna (Melanie Lynskey) navigates a troubled marriage with Jeff (Warren Kole). She cheats on him with an artist named Adam (Peter Gadiot), whom she later murders. Meanwhile, Jeff concocts an elaborate plan to blackmail Shauna to get money to keep his business afloat, afraid to ask her directly.

In the first season, the two try to rekindle their marriage through roleplay, with Jeff asking Shauna to pretend to be a British customer at his furniture shop. It goes disastrously. In the second season premiere, the two break into Adam’s loft to destroy any evidence, only to enjoy a spontaneous moment of intimacy. Both Jeff and Shauna stare at Adam’s impressionistic renderings of Shauna, often shorn of flesh. This is cut against flashbacks of Shauna considering Jackie’s detached ear.

This theme plays out repeatedly in “Edible Complex.” Misty (Christina Ricci) sparks a relationship with a fellow internet sleuth named Walter (Elijah Wood), who tracks her down to her place of work. He leaves an invitation to join him in an envelope on top of her packed lunch; intimacy and appetite collide again. Shauna’s daughter, Callie (Sarah Desjardins), strikes up a conversation with a guy named Matt (John Reynolds) at a bar. He’s really a police officer investigating her mother.

This is perhaps the true horror of the cannibal narrative at the heart of Yellowjackets and so much modern pop culture. Trust and intimacy are difficult and risky propositions, especially for women. It’s impossible to ever completely know or understand another human being. Even attempting to do so places one in grave emotional danger of being devoured whole. Better to eat than to be eaten.

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this guy gets it