#jack spoils her absolutely rotten

[onbearfeet]

Listen to Alpine, Bucky. She knows what's up.

I think that Dr. Christina "I was an excellent soldier" Raynor needs to deal with some personal things before she's anyone's therapist, because she strong-armed more of Bucky's autonomy away from him than Zemo did within the series.

[stay-somnia]

Virgin Chan! hard thots

Everyones likes to think Chan must have had a girlfriend or at least hook ups but I raise you Virgin! Chan. 

-Virgin!Chan who’s never had the chance to go on a date; sacrificing his youth and recklessness for the sake of his group

-Virgin!Chan who avoids his crushes at all cost; locking himself up in the studio until his mind goes blank 

-Virgin!Chan who’s so busy he doesn't time or space to jack off; so sleep deprived having wet dreams is a blue moon blessing

-Virgin!Chan who can't look women in the eyes outside of professional conduct let alone give her his number

-Virgin!Chan who’s content at working until he passes out if that means the boys can live their lives the way they want to

-And then there’s Yang Jeongin

-The Maknae, who’s been coddled and spoiled rotten by his hardworking hyungs

-Poor Innocent baby bread who rejects any attempts at flirtation…or so it seems.

-Our little bread boy has a secret, he used to be quite the whore

-Dating girl after girl, making and breaking any heart he chose… until he met you

-his pretty little girlfriend

-Jeongin would do anything for you

-Sugar Daddy in the streets and a beast in the sheets Yang Jeongin didn’t learn nothing from his teen days

- He would give you the world; it just so happens that you are his world.

-You might be the apple of his eye but he's not the only one fixated on you…

-Virgin!Chan who has a panic attack when he realizes he has a crush on you... their maknae’s pretty little girlfriend 

-Virgin!Chan who scurries off whenever you come by wearing those short skirts that drive him and your boyfriend absolutely insane

-Virgin!Chan who starts whimpering your name in his sleep always drenched in sweat and shame 

-Virgin!Chan who starts squirming when you get within five feet of him

-Yang Jeongin is not blind or stupid

-Anyone can see how his Hyung goes wild over you

-That tent in Chan’s pants whenever you say his name might as well be a neon sign

-Its so cute how his leader drools for you; a desperate puppy at his master's feet

-Jeongin owes Chan (they all do)

-where would any of them be without their leaders' hard work and sacrifice

-He really should pay his Hyung back... and what better way to do that than helping his poor overworked hyung de-stress a bit… 

-Virgin!Chan who’s stomach drops when Jeongin comes forward with a little proposition

-Virgin!Chan who cant breath when you tell him that you're okay with it... that you want it.

-Virgin!Chan who's gasps when he sees you in Jeongins arms wearing nothing but one of his !Chan's! hoodies..

-Virgin!Chan who stays motionless when Jeongin beckons him over

-Virgin!Chan who thinks he's died when the realization that he’s allowed to touch you finally sinks in

-Yang Jeongin who grabs his Hyung's hands to guide them to your most sensitive bits

-Yang Jeongin who puppeteers a trembling Chan into giving you sweet release

-Yang Jeongin who swells with pride when you cry out for him

-Yang Jeongin who gently pushes his Hyung aside to show him how its done

-Virgin Chan who creams his pants watching Jeongin wrench orgasm after orgasm from you

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

This is probably really shitty quality, I'm sorry. Any writers out there feel free run wild with this Drabble? hard thought?

if I get my shit together maybe I'll write a one shot of this.

[marvelfanfn2187a113]

Hi, @marvelfanfn2187a113! I hope you're doing well :D

Imagine:

Sam being a single father with a shy and quiet nephilim Daughter (The daughter is beetwen 5 and 6 years old)

What do you think? :)

Also, I know that in the show, he has a son, but girldad dad Sam will always live in my heart 😔

Hi!

I think that would be so cute!

After Jack, they know a little better how to deal with nephilims, so he’s better prepared.

He treats her like an absolute princess, and Cas helps protect her from any angels that don’t like that she’s around.

Dean would put aside his general dislike for dangerous supernatural beings, especially when he meets her (he’s comforted by the fact that she came out as an actual baby, not an adult like Jack did)

Sam would be the absolute sweetest dad ever. Like of course he’d be careful and teach her all about her powers and how to use them for good, never evil, but—

But he also just spoils her rotten and spends all his time with her and takes her to do the most fun things. He rarely ever says no to anything (he’s a sucker for those puppy dog eyes she inherited from him, which Dean never fails to make fun of—or fall for)

[emocl0wnpp]

Because i'm in a fankid frenzy again,time to properly introduce my babies!!(part1)

(Also in the current canon they're all adults-)

Also they're all in the same friendgroup-

So first we have Claws' and Jack's kids,Liam and Lau

A little about them

Liam:

He was adopted when he was 7(he died as a human and due to a mistake,ended up in hell where Claws found him as a little ghostie creature-)

The doll he "uses as his body" was made to look like Jack(duh) because he looked up to his father as a child

Though as he grew older he looked up to Claws more and more

The doll is made out of porcelain btw-

He knows how to play the piano :D

He was in his school's sport team(main reason why he's buff as hell)

He's very much..expressionless,and has trouble expressing his emotions in general

He's kind of like a mime

But he's a very sweet guy tho!

He's gay..very gay #manlover

He owns a casino in the underworld and is kind of a maffia leader,but still works under Zalgo

Lost some of his colors :((

Mama's boy(the good kind-)

His best friends are Floss,Jay,Corn,Berry and Alan(they'll be mentioned later)

Absolutely spoils Alan(his bf) even if he can't show affection/love properly

Knows his way around guns

If you need a gun he knows where to get them(from him)

Very much overprotective of Lau

Jill's favourite (and only) nephew

Now Lau!

Same story as Liam,except she was adopted when she was 6(Liam was 12 by that time)

The pretty pink princess of her family

Very much a daddy's girl

Jack spoiled her rotten when she was a kid

But thankfully Claws didn't let her to become a spoiled brat

...she's still a brat though,but a likeable one

She was the pretty cheer captain of her school :D

And she was in the theatre club too

Pretty much a Draculaura, Regina George, and Heather C. kind of gal

She works as a model in the underworld (she rich rich)

Loves having girl's only days with Claws(we love a wholesome mother-daughter duo)

Her besties are Cheryl,Jenna and Floss(will be mentioned later)

Makes Jack carry her stuff when she goes shopping

Actually she makes Jay(her husband),Liam AND Jack carry her shit-

Biggest girl's girl out there.

HUGE Millionares and Britney Spears fan

Despite her "bimbo" persona,she's hella smart

Jill's favourite (and only) niece

Next up are the trouble trio..Vicky and Candy's sons Candy Floss(just Floss or Flossy), Candy Corn(or just Corn) and Jay(the pics are in this order)

First, Floss:

The oldest twin

Takes a lot of pride in being the oldest twin

He's a loveable jerk

Trans guy!! (Still dresses kind of feminine to break stereotypes)

Has a deep ass voice

His hair is dyed. Non if it was his real hair color(his og hair is the same color as Jay's)

He takes after his dad Candy a lot..like a LOT

But he's a momma's boy like Liam-

He had to do cheerleading instead of being in the sports team bc his coach was an asshole,but during his senior year he was allowed to play in the team :D

Bullies his brothers as a form of love

Ngl he's kind of a jerk to everyone but it's his love language

Pretty boy™️

Does modelling with Lau :D

His best friends are Liam,Alan,Jenna,Cheryl and ofc,his brothers

Has a ferret named Noodles

Despite his jerk personality,he's an absolute loverboy when it comes to his lovely wife Jenna

Next up,Corn!

The middle son of the 3

Pretty much the quiet artsy kid

Who knows how to make bombs

Half of his face is burned,but he covers with it makeup

He has a strange shape-shifting ability that makes his colors change according to the seasons(will post it either here or in a p2 post)

He's probably the closest to Candy from his brothers

But he learned witchcraft from Vicky and very much enjoys it

He has a prostetic leg because of an accident(same as his burn marks)

He usually wears funky clothes

His wife is named Halloween :D (she's not my oc but one of my bff's,and idk if he has tumblr or no so i can't show her-)

Even tho he's quiet,when he snaps it's over. He can be a big bitch let's just say that-

But i swear he's a cool guy

His best friends are his brothers,Berry and Liam

He was also in the sports team alongside Liam

He stores stuff in is hair (his hair genuinely works as a portal-)

And last but not least, Jay and his assistant Opal the snake!

The youngest of the twins

And probably the oddball-

The sweetest guy alive

Literally THE husband material

But his heart already belongs to Lau :3

Matching west and bowtie with Liam!!

The patches on his shirt represent his brothers and friends

He owns many snakes,but Opal is his baby

Again,best husband out there,also spoiled Lau rotten

Got bullied by his brothers but loves them regardless

He's has a dad bod!

He has a little portal in his hat

He got Vicky's thick german accent-

Unlike his brothers,he learned a lot from Jason actually

His best friends are his brothers,Liam,Berry and Alan

Lau made him dye a pink strand in his hair-

His dream is to make his own circus and he works HARD to achive that

He's very The Greatest Showman coded

He'd probably love that movie too

Next iiiiis Jenna! The daughter of Jason the toymaker and Jade(i STILL didn't make a post of her-)

Prettiest doll out there!!

Looks a lot like her mom :3

Her eyes are made from glass

The sweetest girl out there

Daddy's girl,learned a LOT from Jason

Literally just a ray of sunshine

The kindest killer out there if there's a thing like that-

Besties with Lau and Cheryl <33

She did cheerleading too

But she loves all of her friends equally

Also an art kid like Corn-

Even though she's a sweet and well mannered girl,she got her anger from her dad-

She has a slight french accent because of her mom

Her parents did not approve of her relationship with Floss but she didn't care

She's pretty rebellious ngl

But other than that she's just a bundle of joy

Despite all these sweet things i listed for her she's lowkey like Jecka from Class of 09-

Also she's very much a Heather M. and Gretchen girl

Next up,Cheryl and Alan :D

First Cheryl:

Alan's twin :3(the older half)

She's mute and uses her mask to talk

Modded her mask to sound like Hatsune Miku once

Both of her arms and legs are prostetics(lost them in a fire related accident,along with her voice)

She's a proxy for Slendy

She usually hangs around Clockwork and Kate the Chaser when she's with the other proxies

But her besties are Lau and Jenna of course<33

But she's also friends with BEN and Toby

Both her and Alan are raised by their older sister Natasha

Lesbian women kisser woman lover♡♡♡

Heather D. and Karen kind of gal(she ain't dumb she just loves Karen with all her heart)

Girl failure but it's okay I love her

Did cheerleading with Lau and Jenna as well

Very good around tech and hacking

Her and BEN make a great duo when comes to tech

She learned sign language just to cuss people out

Now Alan:

Cheryl's twin(the younger half)

He gets bullied by Cheryl for being 0.1 second younger

He loves her with every fiber of his body tho

He's dyslexic

He's also a proxy for Slendy

He usually hangs around Masky Hoodie and Toby,they're like the brothers he never had

He looks up to Masky a LOT

But his best friends are Liam,Cheryl,the trouble trio and Berry

Gay

And Liam's biggest fan(we love a supporting boyfriend)

He used to be scared of Liam's family,especially Lau since they are in the same friendgroup

He got his burn mark in the same accident as Cheryl

Ngl he's kind of a jock himbo

Unless Liam is around then he's just a simp

Borrowed Hoodie's old,well,hoodie-

Helps Cheryl with tech stuff

Now time for the oddball of the group,Berry

Zalgo's son

No his full name isn't Berry i just forgot his actual name

Berry is just his nickname

Yes Zalgo got himself a son

Though Berry ain't nothing like him

He's canonically autistic btw and his special interest is humans+human biology!!

Let's not count how many humans Zalgo got killed for Berry

He surprisingly gets along with Lazari

Claws had to babysit him when he was little

Till this day he calls her mom by accident

His bestfriends are everyone in his friendgroup but he's the closest to Liam and Lau

He can be hella scary ngl

When he's mad or just really overwhelmed all hell is unleashed

He's over 5 meters/16 feet tall damn

He's fluffy unlike Zalgo

He made a lot of comments about his dad being all bones AND being bald

Zalgo babies him to death and he hates it a lot

He loves his dad tho

The person in the back holding him is his wife Y(who also belongs to the same friend as Halloween does)

He's a pretty sweet guy who can and will do wrong,but usually he's very friendly to those who are friendly to him

Notes:

Corn's different season looks along with some other kiddos will be included in another post bc i can't add more pics</3

Hope you enjoyed this tho!!

[barrygeuse]

thinking about the baker family (as i do lately whenever i experience a negative emotion), and they deserve some dogs.

they had at least one. a bloodhound that they got from a family friend's dog who had puppies, and jack fell in love with him. he was around before the kids were born. after lucas, they got another dog, a german shepherd. this one was always by marguerite's side, pressing against her hip while she cooked.

jack would take the hound out hunting and when he'd come back they'd fall asleep on the couch together after maggie fed them dinner. eventually the shepherd would look at her with pleading eyes, and maggie'd say, "go on, i know you wanna lay with your daddy," and with permission she'd get up there, probably waking jack up by stepping on his stomach, but he'd just laugh and lift his arm so she'd curl up and rest her head down on his lap.

the bloodhound had to be put down from a heart condition, and eventually they got worried having lucas around the shepherd, so they gave her to joe (who took wonderful care of her and absolutely spoiled her rotten. she lived a very long life with him).

[alphaslavicmilf]

NSFW Alphabet- Evelyn Poole

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

She’ll spoil you rotten with praises and massages. She’ll make sure you feel good afterwards

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Definitely your chest she loves to tease you

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

She loves to taste your cum, she will do everything to make you cum as much as you can even if your legs are shaking like crazy she will carry on

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

She loves BDSM, making you beg for mercy. But again if you say the safe word she will stop.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

She’s a expert. She knows what gets you going

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Doggy style

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

She’s definitely serious being the dominant one she doesn’t dare laugh

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Clean and well maintained

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

She’s definitely more dominant than

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

She’s not the type to masturbate. If she does it’s when she makes you watch

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Leg riding. She loves how you act as she makes you ride her leg.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

She’s into privacy. The bedroom bathroom living room when nobody is there

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

When you give her lots of attention

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Anything is practically on the table, however she won’t do anything that your uncomfortable with, if you say no she will respect that.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

She loves giving oral

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

She’ll start off slow and get more fast as time passes. But if you were bad she doesn’t go slow she dives in.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

She’s not the hugest fan of Quickies, if your asking for one she may do it but prefers to take her time.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

She’s willing to experiment as long as your ok with it she’ll never force you into anything

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

She can last for hours and hours. She won’t care if your exhausted she will keep going.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

She has a variety of toys anything you can think of she’s got it. She will mainly use them on you but she will sometimes have you use them on her.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

OMG DOES SHE LOVE TO TEASE. She will tease you so much that you will go absolutely insane. And if you misbehaved OOOOH SHE WILL TEASE YOU FOR HOURS

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

She will be so loud and have no care in the world. She wants you to be loud to so everyone can hear how she makes you scream.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

She loves to punish you with various things. She also loves to degrade you to put you in your place

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Definitely a black corset with a undergarment dress. Or a black lace set

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

IT IS HIGH AF. Once she’s in the mood there’s no stopping her

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

She will wait for you to fall asleep first. She loves to watch you sleep.

[secondgenerationnerd]

Cool stuff about the twins! :D can you do the same with Johnny boy?

Ooooo absolutely! (And if anyone wants to request Jai’s reaction to the amount of smut his sister reads, I’ll happily write it 😂😂😂)

While he admires his father, he chafes at people only looking at him as “Superman’s Son” or “Clark’s boy”. He has tiny acts of rebellion—his hair is usually messier than his father’s, he doesn’t shave that often, he prefers fiction/nonfiction writing to journalism, etc. Again, he loves his father, he just doesn’t want to be his clone.

The Omega Boys play DND every Wednesday night, as a way to relax and hang out. One campaign, Jon played a Hick Elf, complete with a thick accent. He proceeded to flirt with Mar’i in the accent and made her blush.

Also helped Milagro in her “Noir” shoot

Not shown, Mar’i shamelessly checking out his butt

He genuinely forgets he doesn’t need glasses sometimes. Milagro, who I headcannon wears contacts but none of them knew, had to wear her spare glasses. They look almost identical to Jon’s. They’d set them near each other after a training session. Milagro put Jon’s on and immediately walked into a wall. Jon put hers on and got an instant migraine.

He absolutely adores his nephews and nieces. He’s Uncle Jojo and spoils them rotten

I think he finds comfort in cooking and baking. Like Omega usually rotates responsibilities, but Jon volunteers to do most of it anyway.

All the omega boys have a “non-sexual slutty” moment the girls can’t stop thinking about. For Jon, it’s him in the middle of kneading bread, glasses sliding down his nose, shirt sleeves rolled up his forearms, singing alone to the radio. I will not be taking questions or complaints at this time.

Jon truly loves his brothers. Like are they annoying as hell? Yes. Does he want to punch them half the time? Absolutely. Would he kill anyone who hurt them? Without question.

While he’s definitely the most powerful on the team, I do think he would rely on that power to help in a fight. This is in comparison to Mar’i, who was raised around several martial art masters.

Literally started calling Mar’i his wife when they were like 17. They’d been dating about three years and she thinks it’s absolutely, ridiculously adorable.

Realized he was bisexual because of Matty West, his first “guy kiss” being Jack (since Jack has kissed Mar’i for dances). He thought he had it handled okay. Then made the mistake of telling Lian, when their families were over, that there’s no question she could ask in front of his parents he wouldn’t answer or they wouldn’t have figured out. Lian’s response? “You cant date Mar’i anymore. Who on this team are you dating instead and why?” Boy froze in pure bi panic

Anytime an animal is staying in omega tower, they’re given the best food.

He enjoys working on his grandparents farm, helping Pa as he ages, but he wouldn’t want to have a huge farm himself.

You know the trope of “girlfriend’s father HATES her boyfriend”? Yeah, Dick refers to Jon as “My Future Son-in-law” to everyone. Like Dickie knows they’re end game lol

Jon and Kathy Brandon love to tease each other about being little kids, running around the farms, pushing each other into the mud. Jon also helps to do chores around her and Maya’s house. When it’s firewood time, Mar’i and Maya pull up chairs to watch them work. Shamelessly I should add

Very very very much soft dom energy. Like he’s usually good with listening or letting people assume, but there’s a side of him that comes out that MAKES people listen

He and Colin always find away to tease Damian about how whipped he is for Irey.

Damian: hey, be safe

Irey: I will *speeds off*

Jon: *dramatic whisper* be safe

Colin: *fake swoon* I’ll be so safe

Disrespect him, he’ll shrug it off. Disrespect his teammates or friends? Y’all are gonna have a “conversation”. Disrespect his family? No words, on sight. Disrespect his WIFE? He will actually kill you.

I don’t know how or why, but at some point, Comics Jon and his boyfriend, Jay Nakamura, appear in omega tower. Jay and Mar’i? Instant best friends determined to sass their boyfriends

He’s the kinda guy who will get you a drink and just sit with you when shit goes down, until you’re ready to talk.

[merriemarvels]

for Teej - He's gotten her a few onesies to give to Jack... and the keys to one of his old motorcycles, fixed up fresh for her.

"I know you got your teleportin', but sometimes, you just need the wind in your hair."

While unfolding the onesies she'd been giggling softly, grinning wide because of course he'd spoil her kid absolutely rotten even if he was too little to really appreciate it (so yes, dress the little man up in adorable outfits until he was big enough to get mad his mom kept picking his clothes...) and really, he didn't have terrible taste. Except for that Calgary Flames jersey -- really, Logan?

Something tumbled out of the cloth, jingling as it hit her lap, and she stared for a second before giving him a wide-eyed look. "You're not serious --" The logo on the keys was unmistakable. "Logan!" the tone was accusatory, but the lurch toward him and the hug around his neck was pure adoration. "Dad is going to kill you, you know," she teased, giving his cheek a healthy, smacking kiss before she let go.

[the-invisibility-bloke]

TEDWARD. My beloved, my heart, my light. I'll spare everyone with a cut.

I'd start here!

I'm flattered that you'd ask me of all people, but 90% of my Teddy love and characterization comes from all the brilliant writers before me. You'll notice he's written quite a lot more dominant/assertive in Jeddy or other same-gen ships, but when it comes to older partners... the overall self-effacing personality, the sweetheartedness, the flirtation, the selective shyness, the piercings, the "I've been in love with Harry (and/or Draco) since puberty"... none of that is mine, just common fanon at this point. I worship at the feet of the greats and we all know who they are.

I suppose the rest of it depends on which of my Teddys you're talking about: Teddy v1.0 is a 19yo ethically dubious sex worker who seduces his godfather under false pretenses, and Teddy v2.0 is a 19yo virgin who's been saving himself for a godfather-cousin threesome since like... fifth year. XD So I don't really have one distinct Teddy, but kind of a nebulous idea of him that shines through in any universe. V1 is a bit more mature, independent, a herbologist (idk I think I went with the Hufflepuff cliche? but I enjoyed how it turned out); V2 is still trying to figure out what he wants to do/be, he's shyer, a bit less ambitious, less confident, more introverted, and obviously much less experienced.

The universal HCs I'd maintain in any universe are: he's gay as an [insert pun] and very comfortable in his sexuality, regardless of other insecurities; he's a Hufflepuff; Harry was his sexual awakening; he's fiercely devoted to Andy, a bit of a mama's boy in that regard but only in the loveliest way; he dotes on her and has always taken care of her as much as she's taken care of him. That said, I have read a few versions of him that are more Albus Potter-ish, where he's a bit rebellious and has had ~trouble with authority~ (including Andy) and I love that exploration as well! I think he's a Quidditch boy and obviously Harry taught him everything he knows, but I don't really write him as a pro or a jock, he just did it for kicks. That boy's got heart and soul, I think he'd pick a more meaningful career. Not that I don't enjoy reading sexy slutty Quidditch star Teddy because I absolutely do.

As for why he's my favorite character, I don't know, I think I just—there's unlimited potential. We know jack shit about him except he's an orphan (well, supposedly he was snogging Victoire but I have a perfectly gay explanation for that, if you really want to hear it), his parents are a wild pair, he's a meta, his godfather is Harry fucking Potter and he's Draco Malfoy's cousin. Oof. Honestly that's enough to be going on with, I just think there's something so poignant in the idea of him and Harry both being war orphans, and both needing so much love after the second war, and Harry so desperately seeking some sort of purpose and redemption, needing someone to care for, and here's Teddy, needing to be cared for. It's a perfect fucking match.

You mentioned Cissy, I think she and Andy reconnected rather quickly after the war and I imagine she doted on Teddy as any Malfoy/Black would do with their own blood and honestly they probably bonded over fashion, cause you know that boy got style.

Draco, I like to think he came into the picture rather early on, but Harry was first, Harry was the one who was already there, bonding with him and changing his nappies, and I think he was initially very reluctant to share Teddy with Draco, because a) Harry hates and loves Malfoy in equal measure, and b) they're both competitive fucking shitstorms, which is exactly the dynamic I was going for in Teddy 2.0. But Malfoy bullied his way into Teddy's affections nonetheless, partly to spite Potter and partly because he too needed someone pure to love and care for after the trauma of war, and he did so the only way he knew how: by spoiling him fucking rotten. (Teddy did not complain.)

As for Sirius... that's... complicated. If Sirius had lived, or returned from the veil soon after the war... I honestly don't think Harry would've so much as looked at anyone else for the rest of his life, but Sirry is my OTP so I'm biased. What I'd really love to see is what I describe here under "happily ever after". I think Sirius and Teddy would get along swimmingly and Teddy would fall for him exactly the way Harry did: cool older dude who wears leather and rides a motorbike and plays guitar? Their gay hearts cannot handle. Tldr "If Sirius were alive, what would happen"—they would all fuck a lot. A lot.

Okay, as for Teddy's trauma, I like the idea that, like Harry, he has daddy issues. Andy is his maternal figure but Harry is more like cool uncle, so there's definitely a void. I think being born a Metamorphmagus must be really challenging for a child, because they aren't able to control their magic yet, so there are likely a lot of spontaneous transformations. Could they even be in public around Muggles, or would it be too risky? Lots to explore there (hence the job I assigned Teddy 2.0). I think all of that made him a bit shy and a bit sensitive, which always makes a boy prone to bullying. So although he didn't experience trauma at the level Harry did, they definitely connect on a mutual-outcasts level.

But you raise a good point about him coming off unrealistically perfect. I haven't gone too in-depth in fic but I don't think he's perfect at all. I think he can be a bit lazy, a bit indecisive, idealistic, avoidant of difficult emotions, and very unsure of himself. Haven't thought too far beyond that but I'd love to explore more character studies. I think he just posits (is that the right word) so well as the perfect boy for Drarry from a fictional/fantasy standpoint that it's easy to leave it there.

Silver lining, he does have the world's greatest ass.

Was this at all what you were looking for? XD

As discussed with @the-invisibility-bloke: whenever you have time, I’d like your meta on Teddy Lupin.

Why do you love him so much? Why is he your favorite character? Which ships works of yours and which others sponsored this devotion?

I get he’s hot and loyal, but what makes him Teddy? You capture a fanon!Teddy who seems perfect. Obviously not true. Your fic didn’t quite tell me much beyond he is hot and loyal—and that’s where we can improve. How’s his relationship with Andy? With Harry? With Draco? Beyond they’re supportive and hot. Where’s Narcissa.

If Sirius were alive, what would happen

Teddy can’t just be a golden boy (I mean, be can), but where’s the trauma in jeans that are tight?

[thedupshadove]

*Shoving Claudia Vampirechronicles behind a curtain while I brainstorm a VtM character* I'm so original.

[direwombat]

tagged by @funkypoacher and @socially-awkward-skeleton to do this fun little ugly sweater meiker

taggin forward: @natesofrellis, @thomrainer, @harmonyowl, @adelaidedrubman, @noetikat, @aceghosts, @strangefable, @purplehairsecretlair, @confidentandgood, @sstewyhosseini, and anyone else wanting to make some ugly sweaters!

SYBILLE LA ROUX (FC5), who hasn’t celebrated christmas in ten years, realizing she’s just walked past a massive fucking tree that jacob dragged into their cabin while she was asleep (and also lowkey dreading having to attend the seed family christmas dinner later that evening)

PAOLA ORSINI (UNCHARTED) not exactly the biggest fan of christmas, but the way charlie celebrates it is dumb and kitschy and she learns to have fun with it.

ARI VASQUEZ-SULLIVAN (UNCHARTED) who is incredibly excited to spend her first christmas with her dad (and his adopted son and her boss)

KATHERINE VOGEL (RDR2) who always preferred st. nicholas’ day over christmas and absolutely spoils jack rotten the entire month of december. and arthur too.  

HENRIETTA GRAVES (RDR2) who just loves any excuse to spend ridiculous amounts of money :)

[zablife]

🤵🏻‍♂️Kiss and tell~Jack Nelson and a wife absolutely spoiled rotten by him in all the meanings of this word? 😇😏

Congrats for 1k, Lee!!!💖

Jack is obsessed with his wife's lingerie and never allows her to wear the same set twice. She has deliveries of the finest things every week and is one of the best customers at the finest department stores in Boston. It started out of necessity and has now become a bit of a joke. When they began sleeping together he was in so much of a hurry to devour her, he would often rip the delicate lace or if he was feeling devilish, he would cut the straps of her bra with a knife as she held her breath in anticipation. "I don't want anything between us," he growled in her ear as he threw the flimsy material on the floor. She'd gotten used to him stealing her underwear over the years as well, tucking a small bundle of satin into his pocket after a quickie in his office, tsking at her as she tried to retrieve them. "I want you to feel me dripping down your thighs, doll. It's a good reminder who you belong to."

🤵🏻‍♂️Kiss and tell~Request a NSFW head canon about your fave character.

For my 1K celebration. Masterpost here.

[bruhstories]

You Truly are Beautiful when You Cry

Summary: Y/N leaves a party only to find Eren in front of her apartment. Shit happens. Pairing: Eren Jaeger x Fem!Reader, mentioned Eren x Mikasa (modern AU) Warnings: language, mentions of loss of virginity, unprotected sex, fingering, oral sex (male receiving), masochist!Reader, toxic and dominant Eren, sadist!Eren, face slapping, mentions of blood, mention of toxic relationships, dacryphillia — Eren’s nuts, just fiy Word Count: 2.5 k

A/N: I just wanna say, I have absolutely nothing against Mikasa, I like her a lot, but for the purpose of this fic, Y/N hates her. Also, shameless smut y’all. I feel like this needs a part two  — who knows, maybe one day.

You and Eren have been friends since childhood — not inseparable, like he was with Mikasa and Armin, but good friends nonetheless. It came as a shock to you when him and Mikasa started dating, almost feeling disgusted, considering they were practically siblings. You tried your best to be supportive of their relationship, but Eren knew you too well for your own good, and sometimes you had to swallow down the vomit when you saw them together. It was even more shocking when you left Connie's party and found Eren on the stairs leading up to your apartment. He had a blank stare, not a single hint of emotion behind his emerald eyes, his lips pursed and waiting for you. You almost didn't recognise him in the dim light, his bun dishevelled, locks of hair covering his face.

"Jaeger? Is that you?" You asked, keys between your fingers, ready to hit.

"In the flesh, Y/L/N." He replied, his voice empty. You two had a habit of calling each other by your last names ever since you met in kindergarten. You lowered your hand and rushed to him, wondering if something happened tonight.

"Are you okay? You disappeared from the party all of a sudden. Armin was worried sick-"

"We broke up." The words caught you off guard, but in a sick twist of events, you were happy to hear that. In a way, you knew their relationship was doomed from the very beginning, surprised that it even lasted three full years.

"Shit." You chewed your lip in the darkness of the hallway. "Come on, let's go inside, you can tell me everything."

Eren looked at the hand you extended and gripped it tightly, helping himself up. The two of you had an odd friendship, to say the least. Before Mikasa, Eren would tease you, sexual innuendos all over the place, he'd seen you naked countless times, you caught him jacking off once. You both lost your virginities to one another, no strings attached. But you did get attached. You got so attached when him and Mikasa started dating and the rotten feeling ate you from the inside out.

You flipped the switch inside your flat and threw your backpack on a chair, along with your jacket. Eren kicked his boots off and threw himself on the couch with a growl while you pulled out a bottle of vodka from the fridge. He always acted like your apartment was his.

"Food?"

"No."

"Alright. Now tell me, what happened?" You asked, seating beside him and passing him the alcoholic beverage. He took a sip to wet his dry throat and threw his head back.

"We went in a room at Connie's. I wanted to tie her up with that stupid scarf she keeps wearing — my scarf — and she kept saying no." Eren explained before taking a few more sips. You nodded, eager to hear the rest of the story and trying your best to contain your giddiness. "I didn't force her or anything. She started spewing shit about how I changed, how I'm always angry and aggressive, how we don’t make love anymore. How I'm not the pure, innocent boy she fell in love with." He practically mocked the sentence. "And then that was it. Said we aren't compatible anymore and that she wants out of this 'toxic' relationship." Eren gestured quotation marks in the air while you took the bottle and downed some vodka yourself.

"Man, I'm really sorry to hear this." You lied. The sound of his dark laughter sent shivers down your spine, the little hair on your arms and the back of your neck standing up. "Something funny, Jaeger?"

"You're such a terrible liar, Y/N." Eren slightly turned his head to look you in the eye. Your own name rolling down his tongue sounded so natural, so perfect. You tried to speak, but the words stopped in your throat when he moved closer, his figure hovering above your petite frame. "What, you think I didn't know?"

"K-know what?" You finally managed, a short-circuit in your brain.

"That you're so obviously in love with me." Eren flashed you a sneer.

"Am not—" slap

His palm met your cheek, hard enough to flush it crimson, but not hard enough to hurt. Mouth agape, you just couldn't respond. For three long years you waited for this man to come to his senses and realise how much you truly loved him, how much you devoted yourself to him, how much you support him. Not Mikasa, you.

"You don't have to hide anymore, Y/N." Eren kissed your forehead and you were putty in his hands. "I know you’ve loved me since we first fucked. I know how much you yearn for me to fuck you again."

"You're delusional!" You finally told him, despite how correct he was.

"Prove me wrong then. Go on, yell at me, shove me. Do it." But you couldn't do it, could you? Your luscious lips parted open, then they closed. "That's what I thought." He crushed his lips onto yours in a sloppy, wet kiss, your hands tangling in his messy hair, the bun long gone. Eren's calloused hands snaked around your waist and under your shirt and, in a moment of clarity, you stopped him.

"W-wait, you two just broke up! I don't want to be your rebound—"

"Who said anything about that?"

"Are you insane? You loved her!"

"Have I?"

The simple question made you realise that Mikasa bight have been right all along. That something was indeed wrong with Eren. The lack of empathy and emotion, the aggressive behaviour, the manipulation. Yet, it didn't bother you, because he came to you specifically. He could've hooked up with any other girl from the party, but he wanted you.

"Don't spoil the moment, Y/N. I might change my mind."

"No, please!" The words came out of your mouth without a warning, strengthening the fact that you were completely and hopelessly desperate.

"Perfect." Eren purred in your ear. That was all he needed to hear before his shirt was on the floor and his hands on your thighs. You tentatively pulled your skirt up, spreading your legs for him, just for him. "Good slut."

The degrading praise earned him a mewl from you, your hips thrusting into his touch, wanting more. Eren didn't waste any more time, and his fingers rubbed your wet folds through the fabric of your thongs. Your muscles instinctively flexed at the touch, your body burning with need and lust. His other hand trailed off to find your perfectly soft, round breasts. Your own hands roamed through his black hair, fingers tangling in the locks as you merely whispered 'more', unable to speak louder.

"Tell me, have you been whoring around these last years?" Eren demanded, fingers pushing your panties to the side. It slightly bothered you how much he talked during this, but, as always, Jaeger got what he wanted.

"N-no..." You told him, quiet as a mouse, but he wouldn't have any of that. Like a maniac, he ripped the lace lingerie off of you, scratching your thighs in the process. You could feel the burning sensation in the markings he left.

"I told you, Y/N, no fucking lies. I wanna know every single man who's touched you."

"W-why? Why does it m-matter?" You stuttered, your eyes searching his. Why did it matter, though? It wasn't like he cared about who you fucked. Unless... unless he did care. And his relationship with Mikasa was nothing but a mistake on his part.

"Because," Eren oh so slowly caressed your folds with his long fingers, "you're mine. Always have been, always will be." He easily slipped his index finger inside of you. "And I won't fuck you unless you tell me who else you slept with."

"Ah– w-with Jean!"

"And?"

"And R-Reiner!" You whimpered, frantically fucking yourself with his hand. You were a sight for sore eyes, sprawled on the couch and longing for his touch.

"And?" The word accentuated so hard that you thought he was about to kill you on the spot.

"Fuck– P-Porco and Ah-Annie! I swear, that's it!" You promised, your breath hitching, heartbeat raising.

"One more thing, Y/N. Did you think of me while you fucked them?"

"Yes! Always! P-please, Eren, please fuck m-me! I'm begging you!"

The little plea seemed to satisfy Jaeger. Or so you thought, because he grabbed a fistful of your hair and dragged you all the way across the apartment to your bedroom, unbothered and unphased by you screaming how much it hurt. He threw you on the shaggy rug in your room, and as you scrambled to gain your composure, you heard Eren's belt hit the floor.

"You should be an expert in sucking cock by now. Prove me how much you want me." He commanded. His voice was low and dangerous, he didn't have to yell to make you scared shitless. Obediently and afraid, you crawled to the bed on all fours, removed your shirt and palmed his hot, hard member. It was already leaking precum, and so your tongue sensually licked the droplets, the saltiness mixed with the aftertaste of vodka in your mouth sending you in a frenzy. He scared you — no, he terrified you, but you couldn't deny you were enjoying this. Mikasa didn't like it rough? Fuck that, you would let Eren kill you if it pleased him. You swirled your tongue around the tip of his cock and worked your way down his shaft, guttural sounds coming from his throat. His hand found its way to your head, and he forcefully pushed it down, stuffing your mouth and throat with his (too) thick member. Tears from pleasure and pain pooled at your Y/E/C eyes and he held you there for a good ten seconds before releasing you.

"Did I make you cry?" Eren asked, his voice almost concerned.

"Mhm." You sobbed with a nod, and he once again grabbed you by the hair, pulled you up and bent you over the wooden bedframe. So much for concern.

"Good." Jaeger slapped your ass so hard you screeched and dug your fingernails in the wood. "Remember what I told you first time I saw you cry?" He asked before positioning himself at your entrance. You nodded — how could you forget? You were both 13 and you got a bad grade, crying your eyes out and thinking that was the end of the world. Normal people would have tried to comfort you and tell you to stop crying. But not Eren. He told you he's never seen anything more beautiful. That should've been a red flag. That should've been a sign to run. Instead, you kept crying as he told you he wanted to see more. A sadist from the very beginning, and you — nothing but a slave.

Eren's thrust woke you up from the distant memory and you arched your back in response. He stretched your walls and it felt like his cock was made for you.

"You don't happen to have any rope, do you?" He asked so nonchalantly.

"N-no-"

"'S alright, we'll just use my belt." Jaeger pulled out and a sense of emptiness filled you. He belonged inside of you — you knew that for a fact — he was meant to be with you. Eren cracked the belt and whipped it all over your exposed ass, your pain-filled scream bringing joy to his ears. You couldn’t see him, but you could feel his sadistic smile burning like the sun on your nape. Before you knew it, he had your wrists tied behind your back, the thin wooden frame pushing into your skin.

"Much better." He decided as he thrusted back inside. You whimpered, moaned, groaned, all sorts of sounds came out of you as his fingers dug into your flesh. As much as you wanted, you couldn't move, gravity pulling you down. You didn't know what hurt more: the bedframe sinking deeper into your abdomen, his deeper thrusts or the tight belt around your wrists. It was safe to say your knees were wobbly, and you could feel the climax getting closer. God, you were pathetic. He barely fucked you and yet you were done for.

"E-Eren! I'm c-coming!"

"I know." He told you absentmindedly, his hand moving from your hip in-between your thighs. "I want you to be good and cum, alright?"

"Yes! Oh, fuck!! Harder – faster!" You moaned as Eren rubbed your swollen clit. A wave of pleasure took over your entire body, your legs trembling as you came all over his cock. He didn't stop, despite you begging him you couldn't take it anymore, instead he kept fucking your numbing cunt, longing for release. It hurt like a bitch to feel his thrusts, and you really wanted him to pull out, but at the same time, you had to do it — for him.

"Whoever told you that you get to tell me when to stop?" Eren bent over and grabbed you by the neck, bringing you closer to him. The fingers around tour soft neck would definitely leave a mark next day. "I'm your god, Y/N!" He groaned in your ear with one final thrust. You both sighed as he pulled out, cum leaking from your folds. You were extremely thankful to be on the fucking pill. He untied your wrists and gathered his underwear and jeans from the floor.

When you noticed him getting dressed, anxiety seeped into your veins. Wasn't he going to stay over? At least for the night? Take a shower? Anything!

"You're leaving?" You asked him, surprising yourself with the condescending tone of your voice.

"Yes?" Eren retorted, baffled by the audacity of your question.

"B-but, where are you going??" Now you just sounded desperate. “We can stay in silenc—"

"To get back with Mikasa."

Your heart sank to your stomach. To do what? Mikasa? How could he do this to you? Shit, it would've been better if you were his rebound, but this? This hurt worse. Your entire body shivered, and not from your climax. You were trembling with anger, disappointment.

"N-no, you're not!" You ran to the front door, despite the pain in your abdomen caused by the wooden bedframe. "Eren, plase! She'll never love you like I do! Please don't go, I'm begging you!"

"Don't be pathetic, Y/N." He rolled his eyes. That stupid brain in your head made you fall down your knees in front of a fully dressed Eren, tears rolling down your cheeks and trying everything in your power to stall him from leaving. "You truly are beautiful when you cry." He pushed you with his leg and walked past you. You tried to grab his sleeve, his hand, anything, but it was too late.

When the door closed behind him, he didn't know what he'd created. There, on the floor, you swung your body back and forth, knees to your chin, makeup ruined, matted hair. Your fingernails clawed at the wood underneath you until the nail polish chipped and blood seeped at the tip of your fingers. Eren Jaeger broke you into a million pieces, he ripped your heart out of your chest and ate it. But it’s alright, you told yourself between indiscernible words. The only word that you could coherently say over and over again was revenge.

[casmick-consequences]

I just had an AU thought!

If Mick had been alive when Jack was born and had found a way for Cas to use his grace to keep her alive so she could be a mother to her baby!

Only downside is Cas temporarily loses his grace while it recharges (or until Jack boosts it because they want their angel!dad to be happy).

Because he's upset about being human (memories from last time), Mick absolutely pampers him, wraps him in blankets, coddles him, basically spoils him rotten while Cas just sits there with his big 🥺 eyes because he feels so loved.

Nobody is immune to the 🥺 eyes.

🥺🥺🥺 he would!!!!!!!!!!!!

[yumihoe]

General Head canons

 pairing : Yandere Uraraka -Jirou - Yaoyorozu x fem reader

Tw: Nsfw and Sfw Aspects , Mentions of kidnapping, drugging,  , typical yandere fuckery. Minors DNI

Word count : 1,103

Yandere Momo Yaoyorozu

Sfw

 Yandere Type -  Dokusen-gata - Monopoly type- Controlling 

Nickname - Bunny

Method of obtaining you-

Momo Wants-  needs you all to herself.  

What the fuck do you need a social life for? It's pretty simple actually, She's all you need. She's your best friend, lover, and biggest supporter, no one on earth will ever love you the way she does. Not your friends, Not your stupid family, No one. so as far as she's concerned you don't need anyone else. She’ll begin the process of cutting people out of your life, as painstaking as it is weeding through your social circle until she's the only one left.

They're all bad influences on her precious bunny anyways

If she were to kidnap you -

Momo sees bringing you to stay with her as the final step in ensuring that she's the only one you depend on. She doesn't have to flat out take you., She's rich and her position as a hero grants her connections. If your landlord mysteriously evicts you and you find yourself being turned down from every open apartment, from every house showing, you'll have no choice but to move in with her. You'll be none the wiser. 

Gifts -

 Momo is affluent, She'll spoil you rotten, whether you want her to or not. Get used to receiving Flamboyant jewelry, designer dresses that hug your frame, extravagant perfume. If she sees it and thinks it's nice she going to get it for you, There's no point in arguing with her. 

How she would dress her Darling -

Momo's obsession with being in control has lead her to infantilize you. Shell dress you in white baby doll dresses, lacy white lingerie. Anything that highlights your innocence.

Nsfw

Would she use her quirk during ?

Momo likes to use her quirk on you, and she's not shy about it. Making the largest  assortment of toys imaginable, testing them out on you., Teasing your poor pussy until its numb with yet another vibrator,  She just wants to make sure she knows how to please her bunny, so If she has to tie you down to run her tests she will. 

Kinks- Infantilization - Mommy, 

 It feeds into her obsession with being in control. She needs you to depend on her for your pleasure. To depend on her for everything. 

Yandere Ochako Uraraka 

Sfw

Yandere Type -  Touei-gata - Projection type -Delusional. 

Nickname - Beloved 

Method of obtaining you -

You remind her of him. 

Midoriya that is. The way you're always looking out for others, you're just so sympathetic and sweet. She failed with him, the way he would always overlook her, ignore her. Make her feel like she was second to his Hero work, But she promises herself she won't fail with you. It doesn't matter what it takes, How long it takes, You're her second chance, A mirror image of him. She won't - refuses to let you slip away like he did. If that means forcing you out of every other relationship, swallowing up all your time until there's only her left, then so be it. 

If She were to kidnap you

It would most likely be a result of you trying to break things off. Is she not good enough for you? She can be better. Whatever it is she'll work on it because She's not letting you walk away, abandon her like Deku did. She's not letting you go, So you might as well get comfortable with her. You're never leaving. 

Gifts -

She doesn't want you to feel like she can’t provide for you. She'll do whatever it takes to keep you with her, and that includes buying you anything she thinks you might like, regardless of if you want it or not. You're well aware of her financial situation but whenever you ask how she manages the lavish gifts the answers are vague and undetailed. Sooner or later you'll realize how she affords all that stuff. 

How she would dress her darling-

Whatever makes you happiest. Be it rags or robes, she desperately wants you to be happy with her. 

NSFW

Would she use her quirk during?

She absolutely would. Hover you right over her mouth and Devour your pussy for hours. She wants to overstimulate you, make you feel pleasure stronger than anyone else could. She doesn't register your no's or please for her to stop, You're soaked so you must like it, right?

Kinks - Praise 

If you feel good tell her...It'll push her over the edge. All she wants is to be good enough for you, tell her that she's doing good won't you beloved? 

Yandere Kiyoko Jirou 

sfw 

Yandere type - Shoushitsu-gata - Self-deprecating - One-sided 

Nickname: Kiyoko refrains from giving you a nickname because she doesn't see the two of you in a relationship. 

Method of obtaining you-

You're simply stunning. 

Everything right with the world. Flawless. Perfection. How could someone as breathtaking as you ever notice someone like her? Kiyoko would the first to admit that she's not the best-looking girl in the world. Nor did she have the most … Attractive body. The fact becoming evident to her in her high school days, when even the class pervert couldn't point at a single attractive attribute about her or her body. She doesn't go about obtaining you, opting to watch you from afar, sparing herself the sting of rejection. This of course propelling her into despair. The heart wants what it wants 

If she were to kidnap you-

She wouldn't. Her confidence or lack thereof wouldn't allow it. 

Gifts -

She'd never give you anything directly, but if she does happen to overhear talking about a certain pair of shoes you like, a perfume from a catalog you were looking at, you can expect to find the said object of interest on your doorstep later. 

How she'd dress her darling?

Because she won't kidnap you, the most she can do is imagine. You in sundresses that hug your curves, you in lingerie, preferably black. In all manners of things really, however, she doesn't let herself imagine too long because it'll eventually lead her to another depressive episode of how shell never actually be able to see you in those things. 

Nsfw

Would she use her quirk during?

She's fantasied about it. Using her ear jack to set a steady vibration on your clit. Watch you squirm under her. Yeah she thought about it

Kinks - Body worship 

Not hers, but yours. She's had more than a few orgasms to the thought of you letting her worship, cherish that perfect body of yours. Let her fawn over you.

-Bug 

. 

[blookmallow]

rating spirit halloween’s new animatronics for 2021

or at least what’s showing as New Arrivals on the site for me. looks like we got 15 new arrivals listed here and im HYPE about them so here we go

the caretaker

pretty standard reaper character with a Gravedigger theme to it. hes... fine? nothing about this particularly stands out to me, but i dont dislike it at all. i like his gravestone. would be good for a graveyard set. i guess ill give him... 6.5/10

mr. dark

at first glance he also just looks like a standard reaper character (or voldemort. he definitely looks like voldemort now that i think about it) but it turns out he SPRINGS UP RIDICULOUSLY TALL LIKE A CURSED WACKY INFLATABLE TUBE MAN and the spring motion in the video is actually really fucking fast so, while this isn’t a lot different from other jumpscare animatronics, i gotta give him credit bc i guarantee this would have scared the fuck outta me in person. according to the site he’s almost 9 feet tall at his full height 

i expected him to jump out and scream but i did not expect. That. i feel like if you put him up on a stage or something to make him loom over people even more he’d be very menacing indeed. would also be really good if you put him behind something so you don’t see him until he's suddenly There

i like him, 8/10 springy spook man 

click for more 

grave grabber

pretty much just a zombie but he’s cute i like him. i like the green eyes. i dont know what it is about him in motion but the video makes him kind of endearing to me for some reason and i dont know why. 6/10

ophelia

at first for some reason i thought the monster’s name was ophelia but i think that’s supposed to be the name of the victim? i think the idea here is “girl haunted by a Nightmare” but the fact that the monster itself is so small and doesn’t actually have a body for the most part makes this unintentionally hilarious to me 

like. it. it’s so small. it’s just a little shoulder demon. it’s so cute 

psst. hey do we have any more cheetos

anyway i like how the girl’s eyes move back and forth but the sounds she makes are uncomfortable and she just looks so. stiff and solid and there doesn’t seem to be any movement at all other than her eyes and the monster peeking out so it’s just kind of weird to look at. it’s an interesting concept but the execution is just strange and unintentionally hilarious. 7/10 bc i still think its really funny 

someone should buy this and mod it into chrona and ragnarok 

harriet hustle

WE DID IT KIDS WE FINALLY GOT A FEMALE CLOWN ANIMATRONIC im so happy i could cry i wish my store had her set up i want to meet her  

i love how they have her hanging upside down like this, it makes it so much more visually interesting than the figures that just kinda stand there looking spooky, even though she doesn’t really Do much (she just swings and her head moves around a little, just laughs, doesn’t have spoken lines) 

i love her outfit i love her hair shes SO cute i love this little murder gremlin i love her i love her 

im still waiting on spirit to give us a female clown figure that isn’t “creepy little girl” (ive commented before on how their only female figures tend to be either the Old Hag or the Creepy Little Girl and not a lot else) but i absolutely love this all the same 20/10

this one is fun too because we also have: 

henry hustle

according to the description he’s actually harriet’s dad!! we have an evil clown father and daughter duo here and im LIVING for it

i dont think ive ever seen spirit do characters that are related to each other like this that’s so cute,

apparently his wife/harriet’s mother left them and ran off with the ringmaster. he’s a single father clown trying to raise his evil daughter clown and i support him wholeheartedly

there doesn’t seem to be any more animatronics on this storyline, we don’t have the mother here and the only ringmaster animatronic they have is the rotten ringmaster who was released previously, but i doubt he’s the homewrecker ringmaster in question. he Could Be. imagine if your wife left you for That. we dont even know if henry’s wife was also a clown or not. spirit halloween clown lore going on here

anyway i absolutely LOVE this clown, he does something INCREDIBLY STARTLING AND UNEXPECTED which i dont want to spoil for you. go watch his video and see what he does its great 

my absolute favorite type of halloween animatronic is the “does something completely unexpected” category and this one is ALSO a clown and a GOOD clown at that

and he’s got this great vintage clown style i really like, i love scary clowns like this that actually look like they could believably be a real guy and not just some kind of mutant Clown Monster 

and hes got cards!! card suit motif!!! i love it i love him this is a great clown 20/10 for him too

w. raith 

we have this one at my local store and listen to me. im completely obsessed with this ghost

it’s pretty much just a ghost but it’s SUCH A GOOD ghost. especially in this photo here with proper spooky lighting and everything. i would absolutely LOVE to see this in a haunt attraction, it looks SO good even in bright store lighting. i feel like this under the right lights and in the right environment could look SO fuckign cool  

the shredded rag look!!! the ethereal glow!! the weird jellyfishy movement!!! the classic wooOoO oO o o ooo noises!! this may perhaps be the ideal ghost. it is without flaw. a perfect specimen. i fuckign LOVE this ghost i want it so badly but i do not have the space or the money for this thing 15/10 w. raith my beloved. my true love. maybe one day 

buzzsaw

at first i was slightly disappointed to see that this guy didn’t have an actual name, but then in the description apparently his name is Bill “Buzzsaw” Jackson and his backstory is he tried to be a wrestler but it didnt go very well so he grafted weapons in place of his hands. i guess. you know, to be better at wrestling. i dont really understand it and i definitely would not have gone with “disgraced former wrestler” as the concept for this guy  

but anyway we have mr jackson at my store right now, he’s Big, i like him. he doesn’t really move very fast and doesn’t jump at you, he just kinda swings his saw around. for some reason he just seems friendly to me and i dont know why. makes me think of like an uncle dressed up for halloween rather than an actual murderer guy. i dont know i cant explain it but i like him hes my friend 8/10

wacky mole

this guy’s also at my store this year, i didn’t know his name was wacky mole fsdgjsdg

he’s listed as a new arrival, but i thought i remembered seeing him before, and the description says he’s a returning fan favorite, so. i guess this is a re-release 

anyway pretty standard Scary Monster Clown. his teeth look like candy corn. i like it but i think they should just Be candy corn. i like his colorscheme and his silly giant buttons. light up eyes are always a nice touch. he doesnt really stand out but hes overall a pretty good clown. 7/10

grim

good ol’ classic skeleton. he’s pretty nicely modeled though and i highly recommend watching the video for this guy because he moves REALLY well for a spirit animatronic, he’s got a way wider range of movement than most of them do and his head moves really nicely. one of the benefits of a skeleton animatronic is you don’t have to deal with lip movement, so his jaw movements match with his lines a lot more realistically. i like the animated glowing eyes too, it really gives him a lot of personality. he’s really interesting to watch. like, it’s just a skeleton, but it’s a really really good skeleton, so, 8/10 

BEETLEJUICE!!

i love love love franchise character animatronics and spirit has so much great beetlejuice stuff this seems well suited to them but looking at it............. hm. hm

he just looks so. stiff and his face comes across like, deer caught in the headlights to me. it Does Not look very natural but it looks slightly better in motion (he just swivels from side to side and says a few phrases but it somehow looks less. shellshocked when he’s moving) 

maybe not the greatest execution but maybe he looks better in person and im still hype to see him so 8/10 regardless 

night stalker

we have this guy at my store too, im still not really sure what’s going on with his arms (did he just rip loose from them and leave them behind? did someone do this to him? i dont know) but i love a good spooky scarecrow. love his Wiggles. hes a pretty good boy. 6.5/10

here we have another pennywise, it pretty much just pops out at you, but it’s still pretty good. i like the full size one they had before better, but this one’s slightly cheaper and would be easier to integrate into a haunted house attraction since he comes with a built in set piece. it looks good but doesn’t do much. 7.5/10 i guess 

GHOSTFACE!!!!

FUCK YES I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS

please. please spirit halloween set him up in my store so i can see him

anyway hes got kind of the same issue beetlejuice has where the figure just. looks kind of stiff, and he looks more like a spooky ghost decoration than like, A Person. he doesnt seem to have any lines or anything either, he just kinda pops out. but then again i guess whenever we see ghostface in person in the movies he doesn’t usually talk anyway. i dont really know how id make this better but it seems a little underwhelming somehow. still hype to see it though. 7/10 i guess 

now if we could just get a jack torrance and a bela lugosi dracula id be content 

i would LOVE to see Red from Us but i doubt they’d do one. my other horror beloved is norman bates but i know if they made one of him it’d just be him in a dress waving a knife around (not that i wouldn’t still be hype to see him, but, y’know) (anyway. tangent. moving on) 

mr. howle 

it’s. a werewolf. he howls. that’s....... about it 

it’s a very nice looking werewolf, it’s a well designed figure and definitely looks very imposing, but it’s... just a werewolf. there’s not really anything particularly interesting or creative here. its a perfectly good werewolf. i dont have anything to say about this. 6.5/10 

i also just am not a werewolf person so maybe someone out there who has a greater appreciation for werewolves might like him more