#izuna is grumpy and needs his sleep

[indras-wife]

If you can, PLEASEE feed us with some Madara Headcanons girlie! I feel you will give some interesting ones both NSFW and SFW *wink wink* I am thirsty for that damn man

Aren't we all anon? That man was my first ever crush from Naruto so he holds a very special place in my heart. He is soo crazy interesting that he fits in EVERY scenario, be it yandere, cute or dirty kinky stuff. Slay man fr.

I had to give general and some romance information in the SFW part, but I went a little into details with the NSWF since its my first time writing it in my blog, had to make it good~ Enjoy reading it sweetie<3<3

SFW

Madara is an extremely protective man! Despite being protective he is also very caring, something he rarely shows to his peers, clan members and friends (if he has any besides Hashirama)

I see Madara, both as a kid and a teen, spending lots of time in the library, reading martial arts books, trying to memorize each and every step and later on practicing them either with Izuna or someone else in the clan. He also uses the war strategies in multiple battles, which lead him to victory every time.

Being in full control of the situation he is in, is very important to him. This man spends hours and days figuring what he will do during a specific event. If he has a meeting, he plans the conversations between him and his guest in his head maybe 100 times. He trains himself to be ready to give an answer to every question, even the not logical ones. He will not be embarrassed by anyone.

One thing he won't ever talk about is how he deeply he misses his mother. Despite not having much contact with her, Madara respects and loves her and wishes he could spend more time with her, getting to know what maternal love was.

Moving into more romantic scenery, this big grumpy man ADORES when his s/o washes his majestic hair. It takes a long time to take a proper care of his long hair, and frankly Madara has no time for that. However, his s/o forces him to the bathroom and washes his hair, which helps him to be rid of the crazy headaches he always complained from. He is never vocal about this, but seeing his s/o take care of his hair and him in general, makes him feel loved and appreciated, something he did not feel for a long time.

He also loves hugging his s/o and sleeping like that. If his s/o wakes up in the morning, she has no way of getting out of bed because of the strong grip he has on her body. He is like a big, warm teddy bear at nights

As a leader of the clan, he expect his wife to respect him always and to always be next to him. For this man, there is no room for disrespect, especially from his wife, so she needs to be respectful no matter what, or else he may become a little...rude (and he wont be bothered by it). However, he would listen his wife if she talks about a topic that displeases her (he is a good husband)

NSFW

Madara is VERY, VERY, VERY kinky. He is not touchy in public or in front of his clan with his s/o, but behind closed doors he does not hold back. He breaks one or two pieces of furniture each month. He loves tying her, denying orgasms, melting wax on his s/o skin, turning her into a mindless slut who will be nothing but his toy.

This man is HEAVILY into BDSM and every type of kinky things which allow him to assert dominance. This also helps him take his anger out during sex (not in an abusive way), something he is doing quite often but makes it feel so good his s/o doesnt mind the roughness.

He loves receiving oral, especially when he is working. He would have his s/o on her knees, under his desk, sucking him while he fills out the papers. If he is feeling spontaneous, Madara can even hold some meetings for hours, while his s/o is busy pleasuring him under the table. Not only does Madara enjoy getting the pleasure, he also enjoys torturing his s/o, as she cannot make any sound when he is in a meeting. Sometimes he would grab her hair and pull hard if she gets stops sucking him, to make her continue her job.

"You did good~ Time to be rewarded~" His rewards look like long orgasms which he makes his s/o experience with the help of his tongue and fingers. As much as he loves receiving oral, he loves giving it to his partner too. Seeing her face flush, breath becoming slow and her legs shaking is an absolute maddening sight for this man. His s/o begs him to stop as she is extremely sensitive after having 5 and more orgasms, but this man does not stop until he is satisfied.

Madara loves his s/o's moans. In general he loves every sound escaping her lips. They rile him up to do more and show that his s/o is enjoying being intimate with him.

He does not accept NO in sex. If he is in the mood to fuck, then he will get it. Middle of the night? He will either wake his partner or fuck her without waking her up. Early morning? Afternoon? The time doesnt matter for him. If he is horny, he will get his way.

Madara also loves when his s/o rides him. He was hesitant at first, not wanting to give too much dominance to his s/o, but later on after getting used to it, he orders his s/o to get on top of him nearly every night. He loves seeing her bounce up and down on him. That sight alone is enough to make this man release in her.

He may be rude and grumpy with his s/o, but he makes sure to still show her, sexually and not, how much he loves and enjoys her company in his life. She is one of the people who bring him peace, calmness and happiness.

[oh-no-its-bird]

YOU!!!!!!

[Grabs you by the collar and shakes you]

Youuuuu...

I was scrolling around at way too late at night and saw one of your posts, and I love your posts, so I went to your blog, and bing bada boom, I see the Izuna in Wonderland post and I read through it. I enjoy the writing and the ideas and the art (how dare you be good at both writing and art (affectionate)) and I reach the end and that last drawing.

The one where Madara is like "oh yeah only the Senju could heal u so we have a peace treaty with them now-" That fucking drawing of Madara, has grabbed my by the balls and refused to let go, what the fuck.

He looks so fucking soft and sleepy but like in an unhealthy sick Victorian child way. He looks like he would tell me not to go to school tomorrow bc he likes me but I'd go anyway bc what he really means is like hey take a mental health day bc school is hell, he's just too sleep deprived to realize(care) how evil he sounds. He looks like he either has hair the texture of burnt straw or the fluffiest softest hair imaginable, no in between. He looks like he gives great hugs but could (and would and has) also use those hugs to suffocate someone to death. He looks like a sneeze could kill him and also he is the creator of every virus known to man.

It's the fucking soft yet untamed hair, the creasing and maybe slight puffiness around his eye, the slight coloring (redness I assume) to his nose, the sweat that might be nervousness, might be him having literally worried himself sick at his brother's side and now he has a fever.

I already liked the way you drew Madara, I like all your Madara drawings, but for some reason, this one broke something in me and I can't stop myself from wanting to write fanfiction while spinning this specific Madara around in my head like a rotisserie chicken. Idk if what I'm saying makes sense, it's late, I'm tired, I barely slept last night. I just want you to know that this Madara drawing now lives in my head rent free and if I ever get around to writing the various TobiMada fics in my head, this is how I will imagine him.

Also, love how draw Hashirama too. He looks like a Mii character that got ROM hacked to have a Battle Cats face. And also how grumpy and low effort Tobi looks in here too, his more detailed design is great too. Also I like how you draw Izuna- BASICALLY, I LOVE ALL YOUR CHARACTER DESIGNS, THIS ONE JUST BROKE ME FOR SOME REASON. I'M GONNA STOP WRITING NOW, I NEED TO SLEEP.

I'm fucking crying actually thank you??????? Nicest thing anyone's ever told me about my stuff, I'm gonna explode wtf

Also I can tell you haven't slept in a while so oh my god go do that

Pls take this quick Madara in thanks, I tried to do my best to draw him how I did in the Izuna in Wonderland comic but idk if I did him justice

I've been struggling to find a good way to draw him consistsntly, so I will internalize what u have told me and try to keep that sickly Victorian man energy going forward

[belit0]

Hello! I hope, you accept my request, although it sounds very strange. But can you maybe write about how Indra, Madara and Izuna react at seeing their lover crying in the bed after sex because they were too rough with them during sex and that they really hurt their lover? But their lover was too scared to tell them so they secretly cry. Can you maybe write how they will react to this and how they will try to make it up for their lover? I know it sounds very weird and it’s a pretty strange request, so you don’t have to do it. Love your blog btw!! It’s my favorite <333

Thank you so much for your beautiful words!! No request is weird or strange, this is a safe space for everyone to share their thoughts and ideas, so feel free to express yourself and ask for everything you want!

I'm a faithful believer about the Uchiha (all but Itachi) not having a fucking clue on how to communicate or talk things out in a grown-up way.

Some deal with it better (Madara), and others don't know what to do about it, consumed by their overwhelming feelings and unable to speak them aloud.

Indra

- What's wrong with her? It wasn't even that hard... was it? A little blood is normal... right? Yeah... it should be fine. If it turns him on it should turn her on too. Since when did (Y/N) become so weak? Should she not like his roughness and violence maybe she should have said so before, now Indra feels like an idiot and has no idea what to say about it. He won't sleep in bed with her tonight, but he'll stay thinking as long as it takes for the sun to rise over the horizon. It will take him days to touch her again, that will be his way of apologizing without genuinely saying it, but next time he will be softer about it.

- He will have no idea how to compensate her for it because he doesn't think it is necessary either. He understands the situation, but he feels insulted, and believes that if anyone should be compensated, it is him.

Madara

- Gasp. He first thinks he's hallucinating when hearing (Y/N)'s sobs, and struggles to find the source of the sound. When he realizes it's her, he forces her to look him in the eye and explain what's going on. It may not be easy to talk about it, but Madara needs to know, otherwise he won't be able to sleep. If she decides to explain, he will apologize profusely, and guiltily hug her while feeling bad for not noticing sooner. If she chooses not to talk, he will stay upset, thinking about what might have happened, trying to guess and getting grumpy in the process.

- He will leave flowers on her bedside table when she wakes up, and give her space throughout the day just in case, but he is ashamed to look her in the eyes after knowing he hurt her. The Uchiha can't bear to know he wounded those he loves.

Izuna

- Wow. I mean... what happened? Why the tears all of a sudden? If they had been fucking like this since they met... he thought she liked it? Of course Izuna feels guilty, but also deceived because (Y/N) never came clean about it. If she didn't like it, she should have told him so they could both find a middle ground, where they both enjoyed it on an equal basis. No need to put up with something she doesn't enjoy, or put him in the position of feeling guilty about it. The Uchiha will apologize, but he won't be able to talk about it because he doesn't know how to approach the subject. He will prefer to avoid contact in general, and if she does not decide to raise the issue, he will pretend nothing happened.

- He will not reward her, as he will ignore her until (Y/N) decides to confront him herself. Maybe it is selfish, but he feels like she has been lying to him, as though she was deceiving him since they met.

[ithecrystaldragonheart]

Unexpected Surprise

“Psst!”

Izuna covered his head with a pillow.He was not in the mood for one of Madara’s midnight revelations - their father had made him do extra training in one of his moods.

“Izuna,wake up!” his anija whispered.When his brother’s only response was to burrow further into his futon in defiance he pulled off his blankets in a fit of frustration.

Anyone else would have been surprised that the boy suddenly jumped away into a defensive stance with the kunai he kept under his pillow in hand,but Madara had also suffered from his father’s drills.The extra chores and training he’d have to do if he didn’t react fast enough had been plenty of motivation to learn fast.

There were a few moments of silence before Izuna remembered it was just his brother and loosened his stance,his expression changing from one of concentration to grumpiness.It had an odd effect with his chubby cheeks.

“What is it?” he asked in a long-suffering tone,though it was soft in an effort not to wake their father,or more likely call him down from his study.

“Something...happened.” Madara said in way of explanation.That was weird,it was almost like he was embarrassed-

“Did you wet the bed?” he demanded in disbelief and pulled away from him.His brother instantly lost the previous bashfulness only to puff up in indignation, which was quite literal as his hair now resembled a cat’s,or a bird in this case.

“No!It’s - just come look!” he finally managed to force out,his brother’s accusation clearly having flustered him.

Izuna had a judging expression but was no longer reeling in abject disgust so Madara took that as agreement.He carefully led his brother to his own futon on the other side of the shoji dividing the room.

At first it looked completely normal if a bit disorderly but right in the middle there were some ovoid shapes that were quite unmistakable.

“Why are there eggs in my bed?”

Izuna blinked in surprise but then scowled.

“You woke me up for some dumb joke?” he asked in a withering tone,clearly hoping that his brother was not that desperate to die that he would wake him up,especially since he was still holding the kunai.

His anija squinted slightly in frustration.

“It’s not a joke.I woke up and these were in my bed.” he huffed.Now it was his brother’s turn to squint at him.

“Are you saying that you laid eggs in your sleep?” he asked,barely awake and three years younger but still sensible enough to question his brother’s sanity.

“Maybe,I don’t know.I can turn into a bird and breathe fire,so why would laying eggs be the weirdest thing?” Madara hedged in his defense.The boy was scared that he,as a boy,might have laid eggs and was maybe panicking a little too much to think logically.

It might have been the visible anxiety in his brother or the too few hours of sleep but Izuna also started to have his doubts.

He didn’t grow feathers like a good number of the Uchiha so it wasn’t like he could definitely say that it wasn’t possible.For some reason it had never crossed his mind to ask if any of them have ever laid eggs,probably because of his father’s insistence on manners.

He kept these thoughts to himself however and only crouched next to the futon to get a better look at the eggs his brother may or may not have laid himself.

It was dark so he decided to risk a little breathe of fire.In the few moments of light the eggs revealed to be speckled and maybe the right colour to be crow eggs.

While Izuna was occupied Madara was wondering if they should be keeping the eggs warm or if they were actually going to hatch,they couldn’t possibly be fertile since he never did - he childishly flinched - the thing.

However,when he thought back,it was a few months ago that he met Hashirama.Obviously they hadn’t done anything like that,but maybe the other boy’s chakra had done something and that’s how the egg thing actually worked?

They were so caught up in their thoughts that they didn’t notice the door silently slide open.

“I’m honestly disappointed in the both of you.”

The sibling immediately fell back a safe distance in reaction to the sudden voice.Maybe mid-air they realized it was just their father,but that didn’t mean they could let their guard down.

Tajima shifted his gaze to the shapes on the futon and inhaled.

Madara’s stomach dropped.

“I swear I didn’t know that this could happen!If I’d known about this I wouldn’t- “ the Uchiha heir pleaded in hopes of calming his father’s coming rage only to stop when he noticed his shoulders were shaking in humour,not rage.

“To clarify,I’m disappointed that you didn’t wake up as I snuck them in and I’m disappointed that Izuna couldn’t see that they were painted chicken eggs.” their father elaborated.His eyes conveyed the amusement he got from his children’s obvious distress - it was a rare moment of mirth,even if it came at the boys’ expense.

And that was the night that laid the foundation of Madara’s secret fear of unplanned pregnancies.

~~~

The breakfast table was a mix of expressions.

Izuna looked like he was willing to end the entire Senju clan if it meant regaining his lost sleep.Madara looked suitably ashamed and traumatized. Tajima looked like he was enjoying himself far too much.

The head of the Uchiha inclined his chin slightly which the boys knew as the gesture to pay attention.

“I took the trouble of ordering a special breakfast today.” he declared,face seemingly back to it’s usual stoniness.

The chef entered and once they spied what the main dish was they turned to gape at their father in obvious horror and disbelief,respectively.

“Tamagoyaki.”

[pachu09]

MadaTobi Ficlet...

Hearing 5 year old Naruto screaming his head off so early in the morning, Madara grumbled angrily at his Wife.

" I’ll banned that child into going here!. This is not the retirement I dreamt of, Tobira!. "

Tobirama sighed. " You do that and I'll make sure, I'll sleep in the Namikaze's house from now on. "

Madara frowned and pouted. " No. I won’t let you. That Namikaze brat will just start seducing you again!. "

Tobirama took off his glasses and pinch the bridge of his nose in exasperation. " Not this again, Husband. Minato – kun is a perfectly respectable man. He has a Wife and a child. He is not some lecher who would hit on a man thrice his age and is married. "

Madara recalled a week ago Minato flipping him the bird as he kept touching his Tobirama innocently. " Yeah, no. The moment that brat dared to step in here, I'll crush him with my Susanno. " he darkly mutter.

Tobirama sighed again. Dealing with his Husband being grumpy so early in the morning makes him want to just disappear even for a day. But he can't do that again, because the last time he did it was 20 years ago and the aftermath was not pretty.

" You'll make Sasuke–kun cry, if you banned Naruto–chan from coming here. " Tobirama steered away Madara from ranting about Minato ( their Hokage ) again.

Madara stilled. The Albino knew his Husband hated it when he makes the children in his Clan cry, especially since Sasuke is one of his and Izuna's favorite Grandson ( aside from Obito of course. )

" Hmph. Very well. I'll let the Namikaze Brat ran around here. Its not as if I didn't experienced Obito's much more destructive rambunctiousness. " Tobirama huff in amusement.

Indeed, when Obito's parents died and they had to take in the little child ( with the biggest saddest eyes they had ever seen ). Obito under their care throughout the years had nearly given them heart attacks when the boy manages to land himself in a deadly trouble again and again.

Thankfully, for the last few years. His boyfriend Kakashi had carefully curb their Grandson's adventurous spirit. And their fears and worries had finally been laid to rest.

" How gracious of you Husband to allow Naruto–chan to come visit Sasuke–kun. "

Madara grunted, irritated. " I don't mind Namikaze's brat, but when he starts to scream his head off, my migraine always blooms when I hear him. "

" I'll talk to Naruto–chan to tone down his screaming. And maybe we need to visit the hospital and let Tsuna–chan check you up?, " Tobirama frown, he scooted closer to his Husband and let his chakra heal the migraine pounding in Madara’s skull. The older man's sigh of relief made Tobirama worried.

Upon comprehending what his Wife said, Madara straighten up with an alarmed look on his face. " I don't want to be in the hospital where your Grandniece is reigning with an Iron fist, Tobira! " he exclaim in worry.

Tobirama huff a laugh. " Silly Husband. I'll be there with you and you know how Tsuna–chan when I'm with you. "

Madara smiled delightedly. " Yeah. That Grandniece of yours wouldn't dare to hit me if you're there!. "

Tobirama paused and stared in surprised at his Husband. " I'll deal with her if she tried to do anything, Husband. "

Madara snuggled beside his Wife happily. Migraine and the screaming of a joyful child temporarily forgotten as he get to spend precious time with his Beloved Wife.

[phoenixyfriend]

AU where Deidara becomes inexplicably fond of 'Tobi' to the point of just going 'fuck it' and following Obito into crazytown and, if Obito survives The Kaguya Nonsense, he now has a bitchy art school grad student following him around like "you fucked with my head for a year after making people pressgang me into a terrorist cell, now it's my turn to fuck with you." This is partly because this one post lives in my head rent-free.

(Brainstormed on discord with help from @britishassistant​. Please note that while I do usually headcanon Dei as nonbinary, this brainstorm kept to he/him pronouns and referring to him as a boy.)

Confession that this arose because I keep imagining 'person travels back to the Founders Era and wreaks havoc via Confusions, using different characters capable of 'why the FUCK' reactions every time, pinged on T7+Obito but Obito had to bring Deidara and everyone Regrets, because... boom.

Nobody wants Deidara involved, except Deidara. People especially do not want Deidara and Sai in the same room, because between Deidara's hands and Sai's 'commentary,' someone's going to get murdered. -- (Deidara is of the opinion that he should be involved in everything where there is the potential for blowing something or someone up. Deidara was sort of invited, in that Obito refuses to leave him unsupervised, but nobody really wants him, like, doing things.)

Team Seven is trying to help push a peace treaty through for the Senju and Uchiha. Keeping an eye out for Zetsu, Obito's talking Madara around as the person who actually knows him best, Naruto is Vibing with Hashirama on a level nobody hoped they'd reach, Sakura's smoothing ruffled feathers by healing the dying, Yamato is demonstrating Mokuton as evidence of something, and Kakashi has his hand over Sai's mouth so they don't cause an international incident. Sasuke isn't helping, just kind of in a stare-off with Izuna.

And then Obito says, "Wait, shit. We're missing a blonde." "Where's your idiot, Obito?" "He's not my idiot, Bakashi, he just--" BOOM "Ah, shit." [cue maniacal laughter in the middle distance]

"This is why I told you to keep an eye on him while I talked to Madara!" "I told Sasuke to do it!” "Why do you expect Sasuke to do anything you tell him to do?"

Part of what I was going for was: 1. Deidara and Obito have a preexisting relationship that angles heavily towards mutual antagonism due to the whole Tobi thing. 2. Deidara is both completely unhinged and capable of mass destruction, which means he's perfectly set to Cause Problems. And of course 3. This means a role reversal where Obito finds the shoe on the other foot because now he’s the one trying to rein in Deidara.

Obito is 100% done with Deidara, but this asshole is kind of his responsibility? Like? What's he gonna do, hand the kid over to Onoki? Nah, bruh, his douchebag teenage sidekick deserves better than Iwa. -- (Deidara does not, in fact, deserve better than Iwa.) -- It’s like Deidara is his kid or something, like he knows he’s hellspawn but he’s Obito’s hellspawn.

Madara: You came to convince us of peace, yet you bring-- Obito: No, shut up, it's better than leaving him to his own devices, at least this way I can stop him. Hashirama: How do we convince the Daimyou this is a good idea? Madara: We need to make him think there's a bigger threat, maybe? One that he can't fight without united shinobi clans to hire, rather than pitting us against one another to maintain his economic dominance. Hashirama: But there aren't any bi-- Deidara: I VOLUNTEER

Obito: So what are we going to do? Deidara: Blow up buildings belonging to the rich and powerful. Obito: And what are we not going to do? Deidara: ...blow up the innocent? Like kids? And poor people? Obito: Okay, yes. That's pretty much it. Deidara: Wait, can I blow up a monastery? Obito: Do you want the Shinigami to come after our heads?! No!!! Deidara: What if it's a Jashinist temple? Obito: We have seen evidence that one exists, do you really want to risk it?

Hashirama, full of 😀 : I brought dango! Deidara, to Obito: Are you going to eat it with your eye again. Madara, Izuna, all the Uchiha: [turn to stare] Obito: Literally why do I put up with you.

(Deidara is that one kid who Delights in telling everyone about the weird and dumb shit Obito pulled as Tobi.)

Deidara: Hey, dipshit, you wanna-- Obito:

Also, Kakashi has his four brats so Obito gets to keep Deidara. It’s only fair. -- Kakashi at least has Tenzo to coparent, and some of his kids are well-behaved... ish. They try, at least. Obito's just got a Hell Child who actively delights in causing mischief and mayhem. -- The most Naruto's going to do is dye your hair in your sleep. Sai makes dick jokes and Sakura punches things, but overall, they're not bad kids! Sasuke is. Sasuke. But that's okay, that's why there's a solid five people in that team to handle his bullshit.

Whereas Obito is stuck. With an art school grad student. -- Deidara is contextually the epitome of "I think I will cause problems on purpose." -- (Deidara... is what Tenzo would call “a bad influence.”)

Btw? Keep Sai and Deidara away from each other. Kakashi learns that the hard way. -- "Captain, the art kids are fightingggggg!"

Kakashi: Obito get a handle on your disaster Obito: DON’T YOU TALK ABOUT MY BOY THAT WAY

Jumping back a tiny bit though, Obito regularly asks Yamato to use his Mokuton to seal up Deidara's chakra for a bit. (Is this how it works in canon? Probably not, I think it's just bijuu chakra, but I also Do Not Care.)

But honestly, when it comes to Team Seven, Deidara is that one older cousin at family reunions that teaches you how to hotwire a car. -- Deidara is okay with Naruto and Sakura, ish. -- He antagonizes Sai in a way that ends in tears. -- He. Has to be kept away from Sasuke. For a variety of reasons, most of which have to do with Eyes and Explosions and Itachi.

Sasuke barely remembers who Deidara is, he’s just grumpy he couldn’t bring anyone from Taka with him.

Meanwhile Taka is just. They’re assholes? Taka bitches enough to hunt him down. They excuse it with "Juugo needs you" -- "I'm in a different dimension, eighty years in the past, how did you..." -- "Science ninja. Best sensor on the continent." -- "Also we asked Orochimaru for help." -- "Yeah, we asked Orochimaru for help."

Taka being there signals a marked improvement in Sasuke’s demeanor and cooperation, and Kakashi just resigns himself to having four more kids. -- Juugo is a godsend when he's not being set off into a homicidal rage. And he apologizes! Meanwhile, Karin and Suigetsu are The Worst.

T7+Obito and Deidara have been in the past and bullying the clans into a peace for like a week and then they just hear MASSIVE ROARING a mile away and Sasuke's like "Oh, hey, it's my idiots." -- Sasuke’s grinning for the first time in weeks. (It’s tiny and barely perceptible but it’s there.) -- I don't know that Taka could actually help at all, but they sure can cause more problems. Unlike Deidara, most of them are not intentional.

Suigetsu: Hey, Sasuke, so I know that Deidara guy tried to kill you... Sasuke: He did? Suigetsu: --but would you be mad if I tried to hook up with him? Sasuke: I don't care, knock yourself out.

(Suigetsu is the kind of man that wears tearaway pants just to reveal rainbow leggings that say "I'M GAY" on them. If Suigetsu and Sasuke didn't have at least one 'no homo' make-out session... well, I wouldn't put money on it either way, but I do think it's a valid reading of the text.)

------------------

Deidara: What's it like when Obito actually decides to be serious? Kakashi: Uhhhhhhhhhhhh Obito, previously:

Kakashi: Trauma. It's trauma.

[bayern-moni]

On the scale of 0-10, how much do you want to kick Madara's ass, Mito?

Mito: It goes between 7/10 in normal circumstances to 1000/10 when he purposely behaves like a scassapalle ( = pain in the ass but not quite that exactly).

Sometimes, I do want to kick his ass because it seems to be the only thing able to stop him from being too unnecessarily contrarious just for the sake of it, in a self-(and others)destructive way. Because, sometimes, Madara isn't able to see his own bullshit if nobody points it out to him, but unfortunately the only way Madara'd let himself listen to others' reason is if that person is able to beat it into him.

So be it, I'm fine with it and he is too. We made this deal and that's the start of our friendship, did you know?

So, I don't really want to kick Madara's ass per se, most of the time, even though he IS aggravating more often than what it's healthy. And grumpy, and rude, jumpy, spiteful, unforgiving, paranoid old-born man. Although his discretion, sarcastic spite and no-bullshit attitude can even be useful and entertaining when directed to the right people (and when you know how to channel him into them to prevent him from spiraling into even more twisted dramatics than those you're trying to run from). The point I'm trying to make is: you learn to handle a fight-or-fight, cornered and blunt cat and you'll know how to deal with Madara. So, I managed to reach a mutually respectful relationship with him, in spite of everything, because when he's not being ... well, himself, he's a very intelligent man and I enjoy our conversations. Although I really did want to kick his ass when I had no choice but to seal the Kyuubi into myself to help Hashirama in the Valley of the End. Because, only because HE thought that bringing a fucking Bijou at the edge of the village in order to fight Hashirama was a good idea, it does not mean that it is one. It wasn't. Not in the least, it was unnecessary and dramatic, even by his standards. I made peace with the fact I'm the first jinchuriki in Konoha early, so it's less of a big deal than it could have been, but still.

Paradoxically, I have to admit that the moments when I find him most annoying are those when he isn't even there. I'm talking about my own husband's apparent obsession with him and the (too many, if you ask me) times he just can't seem to be able to shut up about him. He told me the river story so many times I'm sure I could recite it in my sleep. I'm starting to feel like I'll be better off asking for a divorce and leave Hashirama to him out of spite. I'm sure my sanity would thank me if I did, but unfortunately I love Hashirama very much so I won't. Madara'd send him back to me within a day when the urge to strangle him for his overbearing attitude becomes too much, anyway, so it wouldn't even be a problem. In fact complaining about Hashirama's obnoxious antics with Madara is always funny, when I hear of people thinking that Hashi is a cause of contention/dislike between us I think it's just plain stupid, it's not like that at all. I know that Hashirama loves me, like he loves his brother, even Madara in a sense as well as the village.

But sometimes I feel as if all the years he spent associating his idea of peace with the alliance with the Uchiha, consequently his unwavering conviction that the only way he could achieve both was to necessarily bind Madara, the Uchiha clanhead, back to their old bond whatever it took (because it wasn't broken it was still there no matter what anyone thought it still was a gift from the divine) made him come to unconsciously link in his mind the very village's hopes of stability with Madara's own very ill-balanced stability and good will towards it.

In Hashirama's world, if Madara is pacified and he doesn't disrupt the village's armony for any reason, then the village will be fine, but the opposite is also true. Village is peace, peace is the dream, the village is the(ir?) dream (transitive property is the key here), but there's a sour, dissonant note: that's a very dangerous, unstable line of thinking, for all of us, himself and Madara included.

Because, differently from what Hashirama thinks, in Madara's vision, himself and that dream no longer coincide since when their bond was severed and it awakened his Sharingan at the river as a consequence. Their very definitions of that dream differed at the root. The mechanism stopped working, the gears need to be rearranged, not to be seen as the same as before, in order to keep working together. He's not the same as when they were little anymore and it isn't even only about Izuna's death but Madara himself. In fact it started before that, Izuna's death is one of the aggravating factors, not the trigger. Hashirama deep down knows it but he vehemently insists on ignoring it with all his might and that's what is deepening the fracture between them.

Hashirama refuses to see Madara for what he is but he wants to see only the kid he met at the river, because that kid is the one who gave Hashirama the confidence that his dream was possible. He still, genuinely, stubbornly believes that that kid still exists somewhere, because he must exist, because if Madara still believes in their village and keeps on giving him that confidence (that is, if Madara still behaves with Hashirama like that kid would, even while slowly breaking beyond repair on the inside), then eventually all will be fine and everything will adjust itself given enough time and hope. But when he doesn't, Hashirama becomes nearly paranoid and desperately tries whatever he can think of in the hope of tying Madara to their dream of the village again, this time possibly forever and indefinitely: calling him his brother (as if for Madara their real brothers weren't the only real bond while theirs is a breaking thread next to a fine but now forever severed cloth); nudging him to see Konoha villagers as they were his new family now that he lost his own (well knowing what kind of visceral bond that'd be if it were completed given that Madara is involved); giving him hope that he could be Hokage, a hope Hashirama didn't know it'd be crushed and burned to the roots by such a public humiliation. The worst part is that Hashirama doesn't even seem to be aware of half of these psychological issues of his. However, that's the person Hashirama sees, not the real Madara, never his adult, despairing, fierce-but-borderline-suicidal version. And Madara knows it, he resents it and will keep to silently poison himself with that knowledge in total, stubborn solitude until it will inevitably make him rot to the bone and erase the rest of the world with him. All of this while seeing all the underlying not-yet-born-but-still-there faults in the village's very system and Hashirama's rule! But, instead of just saying it so we can try to limit the damage, he just keeps them for himself as the indisputable proof of how the whole system is doomed to failure. To be honest, I do know why he doesn't talk, though, and that's because nobody'd listen to what is only considered an unstable, belligerent madman's apocalyptic words, no matter how prophetic they'll reveal themselves to be in the years. These are still other big reasons why I want to kick his ass, though, and I suspect that he knows. Count another reason, then.

They are just... Ahrg. Just talk, guys, like the mature people you ARE supposed to be but will never be. You understand that I'm in the middle of that, don't you? It gives me a massive headache on a good day and lately more often than not they make it a shitty day. I'm tired of constantly having to listen to Hashirama complaining about Madara this, Madara that, just because they're not sincere enough to just TALK and settle their differences within the limits of what it's actually possible, and because they don't talk about it (and when they do it seems like they are threading through two or three different discourses at the same time that nothing have to do with the problem at hand) they will never understand each other like they clearly need to and then we have to solve all the problems their bullshit leaves behind.

I'm not saying that they could resolve those problems by just talking, because they are too big for only the two of them and they often involve how something like world peace should be achieved. So, you understand why they'll never see eye to eye on that. But talking could be a start.

Mine feels like a full-time, underpaid and overly frustrating, babysitting job. Sometimes, I just want to kick both of their asses for being purposely (Madara) and unconsciously (Hashirama) difficult.

Sorry for my ramblings, but as a woman, a kunoichi and a wife I needed to vent a bit and too few people ask for my opinion nowadays, our self-appointed author first and foremost.

P. S.: I do want to kick his ass when he steals my hairpins out of spite after I have beaten him and Tobirama at shogi. 8/10, then.

For @dinainwater

It definitely got out of hand in the end 🤣 Rambling has always been a problem for me and rarely I manage to actually restrain myself, but I promise eventual next answers won't be this long. So, I hope it hasn't bored you (?) 😅. But I felt like Mito needed to make her opinion matter, so it was worth!

(If the reasoning explained above seemed twisted and unnecessarily difficult, it's because those two have a deeply unhealthy relationship)

However, thank you for your ask like always and I hope you enjoyed it 😁 whatever other question is always welcomed, don't worry 😊

*

[raendown]

Pairing: MadaraTobirama Word count: 4307 Chapter: 16/? Summary: Not all wars are fought on the battlefield. Some are fought at the conference table, with whispers in the shadows, or even in the bedroom.

In a world where the Senju and Uchiha traditional lands were too far apart to have ever made them enemies, Butsuma and Tajima are the ones who come together and sign a treaty of peace. Madara isn’t happy to have his life signed away for him in a political marriage to strengthen the bond between their clans. He is even less happy to have Tobirama make assumptions of him from their very first night together. What follows from there is a journey of healing, of learning, and finding the places to belong in the places least expected.

Follow the link or read it under the cut!

KO-FI and commission info in the header!

Chapter 16

They were tired and hungry, their bodies sore, both of them bleeding sluggishly from at least three places each, but Tobirama took a mild sort of satisfaction from the fact that Izuna looked utterly ridiculous with his long ponytail drying in to a stiff cast of mud. He tried not to imagine what his own head looked like but, still, no matter how stupid he looked it could not possibly compare with the hard little tail hanging from the back of his partner’s head.

Chakra flared in the distance and Tobirama struggled up from where his body had almost entirely merged with the thick mud cradling them. Loud, wet suction noises announced his movement and Izuna groaned but did not look up to watch him crawl his way over to the entrance of their hiding spot. He’d told his mission partner they were taking shelter in a cave but in reality he had shoved their battered bodies down in to a hollow area he’d found underneath one of the massive redwoods that made up the forest surrounding the capital city. Their dirty little cavern had only one entrance, easily disguised by stuffing it full of branches and leaves, but in the fog of exhaustion and pain Tobirama realized he’d forgotten to conceal their chakra.

“Abandoner,” Izuna mumbled, barely enough energy left to speak let alone work himself up for a proper accusation.

“I’m not leaving,” Tobirama said. “I’m just- do we have anything sharp left?”

“Your needle?”

“Oh. Yeah.”

A minute of digging brought out the needle he’d used to sew Izuna’s wounds shut. Now he turned it around and dug it in to the wood of the tree, carving a chakra dampening seal in to the root closest to the blocked entrance. Honestly he wasn’t sure either of them even had enough chakra left for someone to sense them without standing on their heads but it was better to be safe than sorry.

When his carving was done he let his body slump back down in to the mud again. Dirty and cold it might be but it was also surprisingly comfortable, something that should probably worry him a lot more than it did. If he had more energy for such thoughts he was sure this situation would seem a lot more serious but right at that moment the only pressing matter on his mind was whether or not he could fall asleep yet and whether Izuna would still be alive when he woke up again.

“How much blood do you think you’ve lost?” he asked. Izuna grunted.

“Dunno. Lots. Probably more than a liter.”

“Ah, you’ll be fine. So long as the bleeding is at least slowing down then we should be able to get some rest before we get the fuck out of here.” Tobirama let his eyes fall closed with a heavy sigh.

Squelching noises accompanied by a few irritable grunts almost convinced him to open his eyes again but Izuna fell still again quickly, clearly giving up on whatever he’d been trying to do. Probably roll over. In the silence that followed it was all too easy to let the dim lighting and the heaviness of his limbs work together to pull him down under the veil of consciousness. Tobirama didn’t so much fall asleep as he did pass out with an utter lack of dignity.

He woke again an undetermined amount of time later. By the solid darkness in their hole he supposed it must be night, although he couldn’t have said whether it was that same night or if they had slept for more than twenty-four hours. Either option seemed as likely as the other. A quick internal scan told him that his body hadn’t recovered quite as much as one might hope but he felt a few steps farther away from death’s door and that was a victory at the very least. It did take a bit of extra effort to free his head from the mud cast that had dried around him as he slept but eventually he was able to haul himself up in to a sitting position and look around for Izuna, forming a weak tongue of flame with a single hand sign.

Covered in dirt as they had both been when they crawled in here, he almost thought Izuna had disappeared so well did the man blend in. It was seeing the faintest reflection on the necklace he always wore that differentiated Izuna from the rest of the lumpy mud. Tobirama fought to free the rest of himself from the dried mess and crawled over to shake his brother in law gently.

No response. Whether that was because he was just too tired or too unconscious Tobirama couldn’t say without a medical diagnosis. Too tired himself to think of a better plan, he figured the best thing to do was for them both to get out of here and at least get some fresh air, maybe dunk themselves in a river if he could find one. Surely all the rain that churned up so much mud would have collected in a few pools here and there. For once the heavy fall rains were good for something other than keeping him awake at night. Breaking Izuna out of his earthen cast took a while with so little strength in his arms and Tobirama had to give himself a few minutes rest before dragging the man’s unresponsive body up out of their hole.

If he hadn’t been monitoring Izuna’s chakra for fluctuations with what little he had gained back himself Tobirama would have suspected it was deliberate that the man chose to finally wake up just as he got them both out in to the open air. After all that hard work he couldn’t decide if he was thankful or irritated to see dark eyes fluttering open and cracking the brown film of dirt that had dried over top of them.

“What in all the bloody hells did I drink last night?” was his first question. Tobirama paused.

“Nothing. Which is bad. Dehydration. We need to find water.” Ironic when last night it had dripped from every surface around them. Autumn was such a garbage season.

“Can I go back to sleep?”

Squinting in the darkness, his light gone out since he needed both hands for all that manual labor, Tobirama wondered if his partner had a concussion after yesterday’s battle. “No sleeping. We already slept. We’re going to find water and I’m dunking you in it.”

Amazingly, Izuna failed to argue with him for the first time since they set off on this god-forsaken mission nearly a week before. If he hadn’t been worried about a concussion before he certainly was now. Up until their track and observation mission ended up in an ambush they barely escaped with their lives Izuna had been questioning his every word and choice, sometimes for no viable reason other than that he seemed determined to fan the flames of his own hatred. It was honestly quite tiring to deal with and if Tobirama hadn’t promised himself he would try to make nice they would have come to blows with each other days ago.

Now there was nothing but silence as he sluggishly worked Izuna’s deadweight on to his own back like a meaty knapsack and staggered forward with lumbering steps. Soft breathing ruffled the few strands of hair that weren’t plastered and dried to base of his neck. For the first little while his only clue that Izuna hadn’t fallen unconscious again was the miniscule fluctuations in his barely-there chakra whenever something caught his interest or a misstep caused pain to flare through both of their bodies. Eventually Tobirama realized his own eyes were drooping as well and if he didn’t find something to distract him he might pass out himself, probably sending them both crashing against a tree.

He didn’t really want to talk about this disaster of a mission, though. The less time spent thinking about yesterday’s ambush the better. Which, of course, left him with very few conversation options so it was no surprise that he turned first to the only thing they seemed to have in common.

“What was he like as a child?”

“Nn?”

“Madara. What was he like when you two were young?”

Silence dragged on after his question to the point when he began to wonder if Izuna were simply ignoring him. Then finally there came a quiet huff of amusement from beside his ear. “He was a dick. Liked to throw me in the koi pond behind our house whenever I was winning an argument.”

Tobirama smiled, almost surprised he still remembered how to.

“A bully, then?”

“No, not really. He just didn’t like it when I was right because he was older and he thought that made him right all the time. I think…he wanted me to know that he would always protect me but he tried to show that by always knowing more, always being stronger, and as a kid that was just really annoying.” Izuna shifted against his back. Tobirama wondered what he was doing for a moment before he realized the man was laughing quietly.

Eager to know more, he prompted his companion to keep going. “Sounds like he was pretty protective of you.”

“He still is,” Izuna mumbled. “He worries over the smallest papercut, he asks if I’m eating right all the time, he’s always reminding me that I can come talk to him if I ever need to. Yeah he can be grumpy and his social skills could definitely use a bit of polish but I’ve never doubted that he loves me. Not once.”

“That sounds nice,” Tobirama admitted wistfully.

“It is. He is.” After pausing for a minute to think he added in a tone that suggested he had almost forgotten who he was talking to for a minute, “You don’t deserve him.”

Whatever reaction he was waiting for, he didn’t get it. Tobirama had hoped they could stretch out the good will for a little longer but he hadn’t bothered to let his hopes get too high. The half-hearted attack was more than anticipated.

“I think I deserve to be happy just like everyone else, although I would agree with you that I haven’t done as much as I should to earn his good will.”

“Damn straight,” Izuna said. He sounded irritated that he hadn’t been able to start a fight.

“You know he would be much happier if we didn’t scream at each other quite so much.” Although he knew the other couldn’t see him, lifting one of his eyebrows in a pointed expression was like a natural instinct.

“Go fuck yourself,” Izuna retorted almost cheerfully. “He would be happier if he wasn’t trapped with you for the rest of his life. Don’t talk about deserving happiness with me. You want him happy? Then let him go. Let him find someone that he actually wants to be with; then he’ll be happy.”

Tobirama didn’t answer at first. He forced his legs to continue stumbling on while he let his thoughts settle, unsteady beneath their combined weight yet refusing to give in so easily. There had to be some water around here somewhere, his instincts told him that he was close and his instincts had never lied about water, not once in his life. It was easier to think about how nice it would be to finally rid his body of all the dirt crusting his skin rather than what Izuna had said to him, especially so since it was something he had already spent a great deal of time thinking about and he had come to his own conclusions a long time ago.

“It is the tradition of my clan to allow an arranged partnership to seek divorce after five years. If, when that time arrives, Madara still wishes to be free of me then I will not stand in the way of him seeking his own path.” He wondered if he should make that more clear to his husband or if bringing it up would only remind the man of how trapped he was for the time being.

“Wait, seriously? Just like that?”

“Much as you seem to enjoy painting me as the villain, yes. Just like that. This match was made originally to cement our clans together but I don’t think either of our fathers could have anticipated just how well the Senju and the Uchiha would integrate. Give our people less than a year and I don’t think anyone will even remember what it was that kept them together in the first place. Certainly none of them would turn their heads if Madara and I…ended our marriage.” Just saying it made all the deepest parts of his insides ache but he refused to allow his voice to waver.

“Ha! See! I knew you didn’t care about him at all! You just married him because you were told to!”

“Of course I only married him because I was told to! We’d never met!” Tobirama scowled down the forest path ahead of them. “It’s what I grew up expecting to do. That is how things are done in the Senju clan. We’re told who to marry and then we make it work.”

Izuna scoffed. “Disgusting.”

“Just because it’s different doesn’t make it disgusting,” Tobirama snapped back.

Then he snapped his head to the left and barely held in a whine of longing. Water. He could feel the water in that direction. He changed course without even thinking about it.

“Doesn’t matter what you say, I think the whole practice is gross. But whatever. As long as Madara has a way out of this garbage then I guess I can put up with you for a few years.” Izuna sniffed delicately. He sure had a lot of attitude for someone entirely reliant on the person they were sassing.

“How generous of you,” Tobirama ground out.

A few steps later they closed their eyes to let a few low hanging boughs brush over them and then there it was, the most glorious sight either of them had ever set their eyes upon even in such low lighting. It wasn’t a very large stream, not even deep enough to go over their heads if they sat down, but the burbling water was crystal clear and it was perfect for two exhausted men who could barely stand the thought of keeping themselves upright for a second longer.

Tobirama staggered drunkenly as he splashed in to the center and a few new bruises blossomed on his knees when they folded to send him crashing down with Izuna still heavy across his back. A sigh of near ecstasy parted his lips as cool water rushed over him. It was almost more than he could process just to keep them both from lying flat out and drowning themselves in blissful relief. Behind him Izuna groaned and rolled away, the first movement he’d made for himself since waking up. The two of them splashed and rolled and rubbed at all the most important spots until finally they felt less like they were wearing an itchy second skin, more like they were human again.

“I’m alive!” Izuna declared with his usual dramatic flair.

“And I’m thirsty,” Tobirama mumbled. Blithely ignoring the screaming protests of his muscles, he dragged himself a few inches upstream to where their filth hadn’t polluted the water and dunked his head for a long drink, just barely holding in a moan as his parched throat finally received the hydration it had been crying out for.

He wasn’t surprised to see Izuna follow suit, dunking his face for a few long droughts of water. Then the two of them were left sitting upright in the center of a small stream without the energy to pull themselves back out.

“Well now what?” Izuna demanded. Tobirama blinked at their surrounds.

“Think you can shuffle over to the bank? Looks like the angle would make a decent backrest.”

“Hn. I can try. But if I slip under the water and don’t come up I will haunt you for a decade if you let me drown.”

Tobirama snorted even as he began his own awkward shuffling. “Noted.”

After a bit of uncomfortable maneuvering they were able to plant themselves in to semi-reclined positions on opposite sides, facing each other across the burbling stream. Their gazes locked and Tobirama tilted his head to contemplate the similarities between Izuna’s bitchy face and Madara's bitchy face. He was pleased to note that, while there was indeed a resemblance, there was enough details different that he wouldn’t be seeing echoes of Izuna every time he had a disagreement with his own husband.

“What do you even want from him?”

“Hm?” The question didn’t seem to have a connection to anything they’d been talking about but, then again, Tobirama’s mind felt pleasantly emptied by the bath and the drink.

“My brother. What do you want from him? Why can’t you just leave him alone?”

“It’s strange to me that you assume I must have some sort of alternate agenda in my own marriage.”

Rolling his eyes, Izuna scoffed. “Don’t act like this is a real marriage to you.”

“How is it not real?”

“You don’t love each other!”

“But we could,” Tobirama pointed out softly. “And that opportunity is what interests me. We could love each other.” Speaking so openly about this sort of thing with Izuna of all people was about as painful as he would have expected it to be but he forced himself not to flinch away from the subject at hand. Clearly these were things that the man needed to hear.

And just as clearly they were things he didn’t want to hear. His already taught expression tightened even more until he turned his head to mime gagging in to the river. “That’s bullshit. As if my brother could ever love you.”

It took every scrap of self-control Tobirama had in his arsenal not to react in any visible way to one of his greatest fears given voice. He had barely even given himself much time to come to terms with that fear, that he might have made himself a failure of a husband, that he might be so unlovable that a man like Madara could turn him away even after they had come so far and he had put in so much effort. With every day that passed he grew more and more attached in the way he knew a husband was meant to but without the power to crawl inside Madara's mind there was no way for him to tell if those sentiments were returned.

“He won’t love you,” Izuna declared in an icy voice. “I know my brother. He could never fall in love with someone like you.”

“What is that even supposed to mean?” Tobirama snapped.

“Someone cold! Someone who doesn’t know him like I do! Someone who doesn’t care about him! Or care about anything!” He opened his mouth to keep going but Tobirama had taken about as much abuse as he thought anyone could be expected to take several days ago and now he finally decided that enough was enough.

“I dragged your sorry ass to safety, didn’t I? You talk about me not caring but I’m the only one between us thinking about how our fighting affects the one we’re fighting over! If you had listened to a word I’ve said for the past week you might have noticed that I am trying damn hard to learn about him – but no! How am I supposed to ‘know him like you do’ if you won’t tell me anything? Do you know what I think, you spoiled fucking child? I think you’ve gotten too used to being the most special person in Madara's life and you feel threatened that someone else might come along and dethrone you!” Turning his head, Tobirama spit downstream to show his derision. “Well let me tell you something, princess. That’s stupid. If Madara falls in love with anyone that doesn’t mean he’ll stop loving you. You’re his brother. So get over whatever dumbass complex you have and let him decide what makes him happy!”

Exhaustion settled over him anew in the wake of his outburst. He could hardly remember the last time he’d said so much at one time outside of the meetings when he gave presentations. Even Izuna seemed shocked in to silence, completely still and staring back at him with both eyes open wide, jaw hanging loose. It was a hilarious and fitting look for his stupid face.

Tobirama lifted both hands out of the water to drag them down his own face. Despite how satisfying it had been to vent all the frustration that had been building over the course of their time together he was more than aware that he had probably just driven an even bigger wedge between them than ever before. Yelling at the brother in law he’d been looking for a way to schmooze definitely wasn’t the way to win himself any forgiveness.

And yet there was something contemplative in Izuna’s silence, a fragile note of tremulous realization. The silence lasted for a long time after Tobirama’s impassioned speech. Neither of them spoke for so long that he actually felt like his body had begun to recover and the current of the river they were still sitting chest deep in had time to work like a gentle massage, rejuvenating him the way falling unconscious for several hours hadn’t. He’d just started thinking about the possibility of moving to find actual shelter where he could bandage both of their wounds properly when Izuna finally spoke again.

“Madara can fall in love with whoever he likes,” he began slowly, “and I won’t try to stop him. It’s my opinion that I don’t think he will ever love you but if I’m wrong then I’m wrong. Just as long as he’s happy.”

“That is all that I hope for as well,” Tobirama said.

“Fine. So here’s the deal. I don’t like you. The way you guys were forced together feels immoral to me and there’s just something about you that always rubs me wrong. But if it’s really stressing him out so much then I guess I’ll just try to visit when you’re not there.”

While that did sort of undermine the point Tobirama was trying to work his way around to he was smart enough not to point that out. Just getting Izuna this far was a greater accomplishment than he’d started to believe was possible and he was no stranger to the concept of quitting while he was still ahead.

“I can live with that much,” he agreed. “We should get out of here. My chakra isn’t quite at the level I need it to be yet so we should probably get some clean bandages on your leg until a medic can see it.”

“Chakra? What are you gonna do, body flicker halfway across the continent?” Izuna snorted.

Smiling to himself as he forced his legs to stand up and wade across the flowing stream, Tobirama hummed agreeably and thought of the new seal he’d been so proud of himself for finally completing. “You would be amazed how far I can reach.”

“Believe it when I see it,” Izuna said.

There wasn’t much he could think of to say in response that wouldn’t cause a fight so instead Tobirama grunted before leaning down to haul Izuna up to his feet. “Carried or walking?”

“Carry me.”

“Lazy.”

“And yet you are going to carry me anyway.”

Tobirama made them both stand face to face so he could say, “My other option is letting you expire here alone in a stream because you are too stubborn to get up and follow.”

He didn’t wait for a reply, quickly turning and ducking down so he could fit the shorter man’s arms over his shoulders and get a solid grip under both knees. Then he stood up and waited for his new burden to shift in to a comfortable position before wading back out of the stream and heading back in to the quiet forest. If not for the distant sounds of wildlife he might actually be a little suspicious of how quiet the woods around them were and how long they had gone without sensing anyone even sort of close by.

Whatever had become of the squad that quite literally ran them in to the ground yesterday, that would have to be a problem for later. For now Tobirama set a course for the brilliant spot on his senses that had to be the capital city and headed out at an easy pace.

“Do you even know where you’re going?” Izuna demanded.

“Do you always need something to be complaining about?” he retorted. “Yes. I can feel where the closest dense population is and it’s straight ahead in this direction.”

“Freak. How the hell can you sense that far when you don’t even have enough chakra back yet for a jutsu or something?”

“I was born with my inner eye open, as Hashirama likes to say.” He would have shrugged if not for the weight on his back. Izuna grunted and fell blessedly silent with no more arguments.

Although he had very little trust in the longevity of that silence Tobirama figured he might as well get as far as he could before the bickering started up again. With his gaze set dead ahead and his senses spread out to watch for anyone approaching he let the rest of his mind wander back to Konoha where a warm bed awaited him along with a husband who he could only hope missed him even half as much as he missed Madara.

[uzumakinomegami]

💐 give a gift (As a thank you present later on after what happened in their thread TVT because god knows she deserves some damn gratitude)

The Uzumaki had barely managed to get her children down to sleep when Izuna paid her a visit. She tiredly waved him into the living room, away from the kids rooms. It is obvious that the woman isn’t exactly her normal aloof self, her face openly displaying the bone-deep exhaustion she felt. Slowly, she sat down and exhaled as she gestured for him to take a seat. Her day had been very busy, full of caring for the children and ensuring that everyone was satisfied by new amendments being made to Konohas laws. To top all of that off, Izuna had very nearly went off to do heaven knows how much damage to Konoha and the Senju Clan so Mito had been forced to restrain him until he calmed down- which had not been a quick thing by any means. 

Now she sat with him and knew her energy was fading rather quickly, her mood dropping with it. She tried her hardest to look somewhat reserved but it fell flat when her face dropped into what would be her default expression of mildly grumpy. Mito had been told growing up that she had a bad case of Resting Bitch Face so had worked on crafting a more neutral mask that had all but disappeared now when she no longer had the energy to keep it in place. He was speaking and Mito couldn’t quite conjure up the energy to care what words left his mouth.

Then he presented to her a simple bouquet of flowers, dark pink roses that smell lovely in a home that normally smelt of her husbands alcohol and trees. They made a soft smile cross her lips as she carefully took them and examined the soft petals while he continued to speak. Slowly, sea foam eyes rise to meet his dark ones, “You didn’t need to do this, Izuna-san... I just did what any other person would have done. Thank you, nonetheless, for your kind gesture. I will be sure to keep them alive for as long as I am able.”

[fus-ro-nah]

Genderfluid s/o HCs with the Konoha Founders + Izuna

Okay, so there's nothing I can find out there for these boys being with a genderfluid s/o, which is kind of disappointing. I know genderfluidity is pretty damn uncommon, but I am genderfluid, so who better to word vomit this stuff?

Also, they all have happy endings, because I like happy endings.

Probably SHOULD have edited them first, but ehhhhh...

First, Hashirama.

When they first tell him, he has no idea what it is.

After they explain it to him, he's like "Oh. Okay." It doesn't really matter to him, because his s/o is still his s/o, right?

He's not sure why it was a big deal for them to tell him? Like, he still loves them. That's not going to change with a few words.

Still respects the fact that it took a lot of courage and trust for his s/o to tell him.

He's really considerate about it. He asks his s/o what their specific pronouns are every day over their morning tea/coffee. He never forgets a day.

Very supportive, encourages his s/o to not be ashamed of their non-assigned genders. Funds separate wardrobes for each of his s/o's genders. Not enough room for them? No worries, he'll use his Mokuton to expand the house! Probably gifts his s/o with walk-in closets for each gender. Literally whatever puts a smile on their face. All his exuberant support is probably a bit much for his s/o to take at first, honestly.

Totally unashamed to walk around with them dressed ambiguously or as different genders. Very protective.

After a while, he really starts getting excited about it. It's so cool to him that his s/o has multiple genders. Who else can say that? He thinks he has bragging rights.

Low-key excited to try out sex with the different genders;)

All in all, he is really accepting and just thinks of it as another thing that makes his s/o unique.

Next is Tobirama.

Does not compute.

What? How? Since when?

Thought there were only two genders. Thinks sex and gender are the same thing.

At first, he thinks his s/o is telling him their junk is retractile.

*Confused snow leopard noises*

Doesn't like not understanding, and it makes him very grumpy.

The man's going to need a break from the s/o to rationalize the development in their relationship.

The s/o will begin to worry that he will not come back, because he takes so long to think things over.

He eventually reaches a point where he still doesn't know what to do about it, but is really frustrated with himself for his mind being in a gridlock for so long. He will eventually just realize that he misses them. A lot.

Honestly, his s/o will probably have to approach him to get an answer if he will continue the relationship. The man's too prideful to go back to them himself, and he would never stoop to "crawling back" or do anything remotely like admitting that he overreacted.

He still doesn't have an idea of what to do about it (doesn't realize he doesn't have to do anything). He assigns his s/o they/them pronouns and moves on with his day.

Honestly, the man is a bit of a prude already, so sex is gonna have to wait for a while. T minus tbd on the next frolic between the sheets.

Now Madara.

Thinks they're joking at first.

He realizes they're not and honestly doesn't know how to react. Definitely needs some time to digest what his s/o told him.

His fallback emotion is anger. Like, why didn't he know that about them already? Why would they wait so long to tell him? Did they not trust him? His own thoughts probably just make him angrier. He honestly is just really hurt by his own thoughts...? At least for a while.

He'll probably outwardly blame his s/o for his pain and anger. Not verbally, he just avoids them for a good while. It only makes him miserable and lonely on top of everything else, but he's too stubborn to admit it.

With his irritability on the rise, avoiding his s/o, and a lack of sleep due to his detrimental thoughts, someone else will have to reason with him. It's probs Hashirama.

Balks at the idea of "assistance" from Hashirama, so it might take another few days to hear his friend out. Immediately denies anything Hashirama says to him, but later thinks things over by himself. He'll realize that his s/o telling him when they did was a sign of trust, not a lack of it. He'll understand he's overreacting and misses them.

Once he decides that he's had enough of the situation, he'll visit his s/o. He'll probably bring a gift to buy his way into some time to talk to them. Some food or a new weapon. Something practical, but not too flashy so he doesn't look desperate for their companionship.

They will work things out, but they will probably both have to reaffirm the other’s trust again. He's just glad he didn't lose them. He's low-key terrified of that.

Honestly, he's not too keen on keeping up with their pronouns, so he will just call them they/them unless his s/o tells him otherwise that day.

Will incinerate anyone who gives his s/o a dirty look while they are a non-assigned gender in public. They're his s/o, not the stranger's, so don't even look at them. He doesn't tolerate it.

He'll be a bit wary of sex for a while tbh. But he likes to give as good as he gets, so after the two of them begin exploring sexual intimacy again, he'll find that he enjoys all of his s/o's genders in bed;)

Finally Izuna.

Knows exactly what you mean when you tell him. Even though he didn't know for sure, this sly little bugger already figured something of the sort. He's observant and intuitive like that.

Really appreciates that you told him. Doesn't really mind, but is a little awkward at first.

Tries to accommodate the s/o. Not very good at it, and often just refers to them by their assigned gender, but he tries.

At first, he's a little wary of them being a non-assigned gender in public. But after he gets used to being around them as a non-assigned gender, don't mess with his s/o. He'll eviscerate anyone with a smile on his face for them.

After he gets over his awkward stage, he does lots of little things to support his s/o, like picking up random articles of clothing (for different genders) at the market for them and splitting the house chores evenly.

Very good at supporting them without being suffocating. Respects their space, but definitely there 110% to listen if they are having any issues, socially or otherwise.

Honestly, he's probably kinky af, so he's low-key excited to spice things up in the sheets with his s/o's different genders;)

[sarcasm-muses]

Headcanon P.1

Adopt Habit

Unknown to everyone, Tobirama actually had this bad habit, in which he often brought home the strangest things ever, whether it was human, animal or just some random things. He didn’t take pity of them or anything, he saw potential in them, thus, Tobirama brought them home, took them under his wings and helped them unlock their potential. Then the Senju would push them back to that rough world, knew that they wouldn’t disappointed him, knew that they will go far and reached their full potential. 

So don’t be surprise if one day he just came home with a brat or some kind of animal from the Forest of Death. 

----

Grief

Tobirama was still haunted by the death of everyone he held dear, felt as if it was his fault for not being strong enough to protect them. He still dreamed of them, how their dead body surrounded all around him. And when he was awake, during the night, when there was no one, he could still heard Kawarama and Itama’s laughter, can see they run around. He was haunted, and there was no way to get out of this mess, or so he thought. It was one of the reason why he always grumpy and overwork himself, he can only rest if he pushes himself hard enough - or as people tend to say, work until he can no longer work and will sleep right away when he hits the mattress... In a way, this really strain his body.

—-

Stress

When stress, Tobirama would lock himself in his lab or in his house for a few days to sort out his thought. During this time, he shut down the entire world and no one able to find him. He couldn’t let anyone realized just how broken he was, that’s why, he hid everything behind his perfect mask and carried on, until the day death claim him. Stubborn and head-strong, that’s who Tobirama is, but even so, he still a human, he still has a heart. 

He wasn’t a heartless bastard, he just learnt to suppress his emotions because it was what he was taught. He needed to be calm and collected, to control his emotions and feelings, he needed all of that in order to survive and protect his family. Unfortunately, Tobirama was a human, he had a heart, he cared, and he still could get hurt, he just chose to hide it all, to act as if nothing was bother him when the truth was far from that. He smiled and laughed with his family, with his students, he can be gentle and kind, he can be tricky... 

The questions were, can you be there to see it, can you sneak pass his defend to know the real him, because Tobirama is unable to trust people easily.

----

Hobbies

Tobirama really loved book, he kept on collecting book all around the world and filled his personal library with it. He can spend day in there without any rest, thus, whenever the man sudden disappeared for too long without a word (he will warn them about the stress and break down, so they can leave him alone), his brothers/students/etc should went to his personal library to search for him, or his lab. Because beside his love for books, Tobirama also love to do experiments, to learn more about the human’s body, to create more jutsu, but he will never do experiments on a human, even if they were the enemy, it went against his human code, so no. Edo Tensei probably an exception, because he just want to see his family again so badly...

----

Soft Spot

He actually had a small spot for children, which meant he tent to be gentle to them and never raised his hand against them. After all, Konoha was founded to make sure all the kid will be protected and can grow to their full potential. Tobirama always try to make sure all the kid in Konoha can have a stable enough life, even the orphan one. The children were the Konoha’s future, that’s why, Tobirama wanted to protect them. 

But sometimes, he wondered, children still had to fight and still die (less but it still happens). The world still filled with war and greedy people, then had things really changed like his brother hoped? He didn’t know, he was confused, but this was Hashirama’s wish, and he will make sure to protect it... Because he cared for him and because he too, wanted to see the world change into a better place.

----

Uchiha

There was one thing people seem to mistake, it was Tobirama’s hatred for the Uchiha Clan. I won’t explain much, I will just quote you something he would say if anyone ever talked to him about this topic. 

“I gave the Uchiha Clan a position of power, gave them land and free housing. I didn’t even force them to be the police, it was their choice and I did believe they will be the best defense seeing they were my clan’s rival. I fought them. I knew what they are capable at. Personal feeling is one thing but when it comes to Konoha, it is another story. Konoha was created and founded by Hashirama and Madara, while I do not think it is much different because children still fight and die, it still their dream to archive peace. I dislike Madara, yes, because I saw how he changed after Izuna’s dead. If you recalled, one of my student is an Uchiha and did I treat him different? No. Many Uchiha were part of Konoha’s system and held such high position. But of course you won’t able to see it.” 

However you think is now your responsible, never forget this, Tobirama does not hate the Uchiha, he has his own thought and different way to view them.

----

Sexual and Sex Drive

Tobirama was fine with any gender, but he rarely felt attract to someone so it’s understandable when people mistaked him for asexual. For him to develop a relationship, he needed to trust them first, for that, he probably demisexual.

It’s hard for Tobirama to fall in love because he had trust issues, but when he fell, he fell hard. He would gave them his everything, he wouldn’t say those romantic words, but he could showed them just how much he cared for them through his actions. He also attracted to male more than female, but he enjoyed strong women who know how to act and behave in public as well as can held themselves against their enemies.

Another thing, Tobirama had low sexual drive, he wouldn’t sleep with just anyone. However, he knew enough about it, Butsuma made sure Tobirama learn it all.

(To be Cont.)

[belit0]

1000k Commission [Uchiha Izuna / Fem Reader] @izunaswife ​

Can I please have Izuna gushing over the reader’s big boobs? Surprise me bb

[I hope you enjoy this my love, just for Christmas !!!]

"Where are you going?" 

Izuna inquired from the bed, still half asleep.

"To the computer? Some of us have to work even when there's a global pandemic out there.” 

You explain as you comb your hair and adjust your low-cut blouse in front of the mirror.

"But why are you dressed like that?"

"What's wrong with my clothes?

"Take that off [Y/N]."

"You're not my father Izuna, go back to sleep."

It's not shocking that the Uchiha was overacting. Since his job consisted entirely of the family business of killing for money, he works from time to time. And although his insistent efforts to make you stay at home and act as his beautiful trophy wife continued to come, you constantly refused, being determined to work and earn your own money.

Friday morning, you have the last work video call of the week, and of course, you like to look good in front of your colleagues. So when you woke up you decided to wear one of your favorite pieces, a beautiful low-cut shirt, revealing to some extent.

Izuna woke up together with you, committed to providing moral support as today he had no life to steal. The business was temporarily slowed down by the pandemic, and all the Uchihas were left to stay home with their families. Direct orders from Indra.

He waited for you to take a bath, and fought against sleep while you were applying your make-up, but his eyes opened wide when he saw you with the blouse he bought especially for you.

Sitting at the desk that was inside the room, you opened the computer and prepared the necessary files for the working day.

"[Y/N] I'm serious, choose something quieter."

"You're talking like an idiot, Uchiha. Listen to yourself."

"Do you work with a whole team of women?" 

Izuna sat on the bed, leaving his bare chest in the air.

"No?"

"So?"

"So what?"

"It's obvious that they'll be touching their dicks under their tables with your beautiful boobs on screen."

"You certainly are nasty when you want to be. It's work, Izuna. Not a brothel."

He grabbed his cell phone, and whispering things to himself he was angry against the back of the bed.

After a few minutes, he approached the desk, and without even looking at you, sat right by your side, where the camera couldn't focus on him but he could see everything. With his long pajama trousers and his grumpy pout, he looked like a little boy.

"Do you mind?"

"No, not at all. When you're done, we can go back to bed."

Knowing that it was useless to fight his whim, you opened the incoming call of your partner, entering the group that had to meet virtually to discuss some issues. The conversation was normal, jovial, and professional, the problems were solved efficiently and your man behaved well by your side, like a guard dog but silent. No one made any inappropriate comments, and even your boss complimented you on your good work.

Until the meeting ended and your superiors started to abandon the video call. Being left alone with your peers and an extremely jealous boyfriend at your side, the combination was predictably fatal.

"Hey [Y/N]"

One of your colleagues greeted you, relaxed for the end of the week.

A friendly smile was all you answered, whether Izuna was there or not, you were not interested in the attention of other men.

"What do you say if you and I go out for a drink tomorrow night? Oh no, wait, the bars are closed... I guess there's no other option for you to come to my place?”

The Uchiha was about to jump in front of the camera, but by patiently squeezing his thigh you stopped him, indicating that he must let you solve it.

"No, thank you. I have a boyfriend."

"He doesn't need to know, you see? Those two look very pretty in that blouse."

Completely shocked and horrified by the man's disgusting cheekiness, you didn't even care that Izuna appeared on stage and took control.

"Hey, buddy. How are you? I'm the boyfriend who doesn't need to know."

"Um... sorry man... I...."

"Nono, it's okay. We're friends, right? Do you like my girlfriend, dude?"

"N-No I..."

"Come on, man, speak up, maybe your balls are stuck in your throat? I'll tell you something, homie, she's mine, and I'm not someone you want to deal with. I can have your head in a bag in half an hour if I want. Keep your miserable, needy eyes off my girl, or you won't be able to tell what happens next.”

"So-orry S-Sir..."

Izuna closed the computer forcefully, not caring about breaking it in the process. He looked at you with possession and leaned against the desk with both hands resting on it.

"Well? Will you listen to me next time? I know how this thi-“

But his words stopped when a fine tear fell down your cheek.

"I feel... dirty..."

Understanding your stance, he took you by the hand and led you to the bed, lying next to you again.

He took off your blouse and threw it as far as possible.

"We'll get another one, kay? The one you like best."

Holding your upset and sad shape in his arms, he kissed the side of your head, reaching down to your cheek, running along your chin, and landing on your lips.

"Those eyes... I just want you to look at me like that. No one else. No one else. Take care of me."

Knowing what you needed, Izuna understood what to do to make you forget the bad moment.

"You are mine. Therefore, I will always take care of you and protect you. Not only now, but forever. I'm the only man who can look at you like that.”

He went down with his lips along the side of your neck, leaving a wet trail where his tongue slipped as little noises started to come from your lips.

Without delay, he reached the problem area.

Holding your breasts with both hands, he looked into your eyes and spoke.

"These? mine. Maybe I should leave a mark on them so that you feel more reassured..."

He started biting one of your nipples while squeezing the other with two fingers. His teeth were soft on your sensitive pearl, while your hands grabbed his hair and gave him lovely moans of contentment.

With one of his, he slapped the boob he couldn't take care of with his mouth, making you startle.

"What beautiful breasts you have [Y/N]. What if I want to stay here all day, playing with your nipples and leaving them all red?"

That said, his attention was focused on the one which had not received the attention of his tongue. The one that got free was attacked by his hand, as he squeezed gently and made sounds of approval while sucking and biting.

Whoever said that it was impossible to come by your breasts, was wrong, because Izuna made you melt under his lips.

"Take me like the good girl you are."

From one moment to the next, his cock was between your breasts, while your hands squeezed so his member would find the same pleasure as in your pussy.

Opening your mouth and looking into his eyes, you tasted his dick's head every time it impacted against your tongue, listening to his moans and watching your skin get wet between his length and your shape.

"So pretty eating my cock, fuck."

His pace was quick, and he seemed enchanted by the image of your two beautiful boobs catching his limb. The friction pushed him to the limit without much effort, and his seed spilled over your nipples, chest, and stomach, staining you completely while he was jerking his cock with release and rubbing it with one hand.

"I hope you like my mark, love."

[fatcatsarecats]

Bossy Boots

Madara & Tobirama Words: 2,617 A/N: The Kid!Tobirama fic that no one asked for. Here it is anyway! Possible sequel in the works. Betaed by the shameless enabler, @redhothollyberries. Set in IzunaIsAlive!AU because no Izuna = no me.

-

Days-off are a scarce, sacred thing. Everyone knows better than to disrupt Madara’s routine of sleep, eat, train and read when it’s his day off on the threat of having their head bitten off. Like most things in life, however, Hashirama is the exception.

Or Hashirama just doesn’t care. Most likely both. Senjus seem to be immune to his scare tactics.

Hashirama knocks on his door, an hour earlier than Madara had planned to wake up. Irate, Madara opens the door ready to breathe fire - only to halt and blink his bleariness away.

Madara stares at Hashirama. Then he stares harder at the child in his arms. A very familiar-looking child with white spiky hair, red streaks down his cheeks and chin and the most fearsome glower to be ever paired with such chubby cheeks.  

“What is that?” Madara blurts out.

Lord, the way the child is glaring at him makes him feel as skewered and spit roasted as a hunted boar. It’s ridiculous. This teeny tiny child shouldn’t be able to exude so much malicious intent.

Hashirama sighs. “Don’t be mean, Madara. This is Tobi. There was an accident when Tobi was field testing his jutsu.” Hashirama pauses. “Again.”

Whether Hashirama realised his wording or not, Madara snickers. “Isn’t he too old to be having accidents around the place?”

Tobirama sneers, all squeaky and squinty and evil.

“You’re an accident.”

Madara gapes. “Excuse you?”

“Really, Madara?” Hashirama asks in disbelief. “Out of the two of us, I would not have picked you to be the one fighting with a five year old. I hope you know that I have my disappointed face on.”

Hashirama puts enough shame in his rebuke that Madara almost thinks twice about glaring at the prickly porcupine in his arms. He bites his tongue, lest he rebuttals with sometime immature like the fact that Tobirama started it first. And he won’t, because if he does, then Tobirama wins. Madara, the ever mature person that he is, refuses to let a five year old best him.

Plus, Madara hates Hashirama’s disappointed face. It strikes the most disgusting feelings inside him – like guilt, shame and regret.

Absolutely disgusting.

Tobirama sticks his tongue out at him, and Madara’s eye twitches.

“Could you look after Tobi today? Pretty please?” Hashirama asks. “I promise I’ll repay you with dinner some other night.”

Sniffing, Tobirama looks away. “I can look after myself.”

Incredulous, Madara raises both eyebrows. “You can barely reach the counter.”

“And you can barely win an argument.”

“You little–”

“Five year old,” Hashirama reminds him.

Breathing in a harsh gulp of air, Madara calms himself down. He wouldn’t be surprised if a vein is poking out of his forehead. That’s just the effect Tobirama has on him. Still, Tobirama is only five. Even if he is leaps and bounds ahead of other five year olds, Madara is the full grown adult here. He should not be so easily provoked.

“How long is he going to be like this?” Madara asks.

Hashirama’s only answer is a shrug. “His notes didn’t say much. They just say he’ll eventually ‘revert’ back to his normal state. Everybody else is at work, and I don’t finish till late at night. Please take care of him till I finish?”

Hashirama attempts to widen his eyes for transparency. Madara is sceptical. Tobirama, still lodged in Hashirama’s arms, continues to wish pain and suffering upon Madara using his facial features alone. Nothing out of the ordinary, really.

“Fine.” Madara sighs. “Bring him in.”

-

The thing is, Tobirama has the chubbiest cheek and the biggest eyes he’s ever seen on a such a small body. He’s on the shorter side, rounder than Madara expected, and he exudes so much belligerent confidence while being all wrapped up in a small, dark blue yukata.

It’s downright adorable.

Normal developmental milestones are not something Tobirama adheres to. Madara knows this; like everything else in life, Tobirama accelerates. It shouldn’t surprise him how self-sufficient and intelligent he is for a five year old.

His insistences on taking care of himself almost gave Madara a heart attack. He put Tobirama in one place, told him to stay, and the next time he blinked, Tobirama had somehow gotten his short little legs standing on a chair while attempting to cut an apple into small slices.  

On another note, Tobirama is cutting his nerves into small slices. What with the way he’s silent and unblinking when he just stares at Madara across the coffee table.

Madara peers up at Tobirama from his book. “Do you even blink?”

Like an owl, Tobirama is nonplussed and silent.

“Do you want a colouring book and some pencils?” Madara asks. “A book to read? Math problems to do? A nap? People to skewer?”

Tobirama doesn’t answer, or twitch. Madara squints his eyes. He wouldn’t put it past Tobirama to stop breathing out of pure spite.

Madara decides for him. “I’ll bring out a bit of everything, so you can decide for yourself what you want to do, alright?” Everything except the last thing he mentioned, of course. Kid Tobirama is scary enough as it is, Madara doesn’t need more nightmare material by watching a cute little kid stabbing people with glee.

Silence is the only thing that answers him, and he interprets it as a yes. He hauls himself up from the floor and lugs through his house, grabbing a blanket, a pillow and an assortment of puzzles he thinks five year old Tobirama will enjoy. They’re puzzles that he himself fiddles with when he gets fidgety. If it’s enough to entertain him, then it’s surely enough to challenge a teeny tiny prodigy.

He almost drops everything when he steps into the living room, finding it empty and Tobirama gone.  

-

Tobirama can’t have gone far. Literally, teeny tiny legs.

Considering Tobirama’s penchant for high places, Madara heads straight to the top of Hokage Mountain: adult Tobirama has two places he frequents when he wants to ponder on his thoughts, and since a very quick visit to the Senju Koi pond revealed it empty, sure enough Madara finds Tobirama on the top of the mountain, huddled with his knees up, looking off into the city.

It’s ridiculous that he has enough chakra control to climb up the Hokage mountain. Chills stab into his neck at the thought of a small Tobirama tumbling off a cliff so high. Panic is not something he handles well. Anger, however, is a familiar and warm cloak he frequently wears.

Before he can strip a hide into Tobirama, Tobirama sweeps him off guard with his grumblings.

“Why do you care where I go?” He buries his head into his knees. “You don’t even like me anyway.”

All the hot air rush out of him. Madara flops down beside him, defeated. “Correct me if I’m wrong, but I thought you turned into a child, not an angsty teenager.”

Tobirama frowns. “I’m not angsty.”

“You’re definitely angsty for a five year old,” Madara informs him, amused. “And you have a ridiculously expansive vocabulary for someone so young. You’re also wrong in that I do care, and that I do like you.”

Tobirama looks at him, sceptical at the thought of anyone wanting him around.

What a heart clencher. Feelings and Madara are not the closest friends, but if opening up will get rid of this doubt that’s clouding around Tobirama, then so be it.

Tobirama should never have to doubt about people wanting him around.

“I do,” Madara reaffirms. “I think you’re smart, courageous, and kind, even when you’re throwing things at me. Sharp things, by the way. I regard your opinion very highly. Fighting, and talking with your older self is something that I look forward to every day.”

“You didn’t want me this morning.”

“I was grumpy at being woken up so early, since this is my only day off this week. I suppose I should apologise for that.” Madara scratches the back of his head.  “I’m sorry if I was being a grump to you. I would promise to try not to be one again, but I’m just a naturally grumpy person.”

“I remember.” Tobirama twitches his nose. “I remember a lot of things. It’s…confusing.”

Madara bets. Two sets of memories in such a tiny body - one that’s running on a child’s logic and feelings. That’s got to be one uncomfortable, perplexing mix.

Always so much wiser than his years, Tobirama offers his own apology. “I’m sorry I was mean to you. Brother never wants to play with me. He’s always leaving me behind when he plays with our cousins. I know that he’s the Hokage, and that’s important, but I didn’t like that he was passing me off to someone else again.”

Madara’s familiar with brotherly resentment. It’s an inevitable part of growing up, but he’s always made the effort to never exclude Izuna. Even when he’s busy, Madara is adamant in making sure that Izuna knows that he comes first as family does.

Madara knows Hashirama too well. All the good with all the bad. He’s aware that Hashirama has a habit of valuing other people’s regard higher than he values his brother’s.

Clearly, Tobirama knows this. Resignation slumps his small shoulders.

It occurs to Madara that if seven year old Madara had met seven year old Hashirama and discovered this, the former would have surely kicked the latter’s ass. Children make mistakes, everyone does, but little siblings should never doubt their value to their older brothers.

That’s just unacceptable.

“Well, you got me on my day off. I’m here as your obedient minion. We don’t need Hashirama to have fun. We’ll do it on our own,” Madara says. “How about we play a prank on Izuna to cheer you up?”

A small smile blossoms on Tobirama’s face. Tobirama puts his arms up, in a silent demand to be piggy backed down. Either Tobirama is a cat, and climbing up is vastly easier than climbing down, or Tobirama has deemed Madara worthy of carrying him down.

Tobirama’s bossy attitude is adorable.

“Can we make him scream really high?” asks Tobirama as he climbs up Madara’s back. “His shrieking is funny.”

Tobirama rests his cheek against the side of Madara’s face. The cold press of soft skin shocks him slightly, before he chuckles.

“Like I said, I’m here as your obedient minion,” Madara tells him. “Your every wish is my command.”

-

When Izuna shrieks later that afternoon, it sounds glorious.

Madara sits on a cushion with a book in his hand and tea on the table. Tobirama snaps the book he’s reading shut, and scampers under a set of blankets beside Madara. He huddles into the blankets and turns his back towards the door as heavy footsteps stomp their way to their living room.

The room slides open with a crash to reveal a shirtless Izuna with a towel wrapped around his waist.

“You little shi–”

“Language,” Madara scolds. Beside him, he can feel Tobirama shake with mirth, but he doesn’t let any sound escape. Technically, he’s an adult that’s heard worse, but Madara does it for the sake watching Izuna grow redder.

And what a satisfying sight it is.

Izuna growls. “You morbidly disturbed little panda bear.” He points a shaky, furious finger at the lump. “I know you’re the one that did this!”

He gestures to his hair. His long, spiky hair. His long, spiky, neon-orange hair that’s glittering like firework sparks from the way the sun is illuminating it.

Madara raises one eyebrow. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, Izuna. He’s five.”

“He’s evil!”

“He’s asleep. And inside voices! Can’t you see that it’s nap time?”

The look that Izuna throws him is absolutely withering. Madara wants it painted and hung in his office.

But he doesn’t let his lips twitch. Instead, Madara says, “For what it’s worth, you’re looking exceptionally fiery today.”

The bundle of blankets beside him snorts. Madara squashes the bundle with his weight in rebuke, because sleeping little boys in the middle of nap time absolutely do not snort.

Izuna claws at his hair. He does his best to tug a handful out while screeching in frustration. He stomps out of the room, the screech fading as he gets further away.

Once he’s clear of imminent danger, Tobirama pokes his head out of the blankets, sniggering. “Can we do brother next?” he asks, eyes bright with devious intentions.

Madara thinks on it. “I’ve got another idea; how about we do Tōka next, but we frame Hashirama?”

Worry crosses Tobirama’s rounded features. “Tōka’s really smart, though. It’ll be hard tricking her. She’s the oldest.“

Sage. He remembers when being the oldest was the single end to every and all arguments he ever had with his brother. Madara wants to keel over and clutch his heart from the cuteness of Tobirama’s serious features. How he missed those days.

And don’t get him started on how precious Tobirama’s awe for Tōka is.

Madara closes his book. “It’s two against one. I think those are pretty good odds.”

Tobirama considers his choices for the moment, before the biggest grin splits his face. He nods, and holds his arm up, signalling Madara to carry him for easy conspiring.

Madara obliges him. Tobirama fits to his side like a warm, soft, missing puzzle piece.

Together, they duck their heads close, and they plan.

-

Madara startles awake at the feeling of a chakra signature entering his room. He sits up, blinks his blurry eyes rapidly to meet big, red ones staring back at him.

He jolts back and throws his swearing rule out the window.

“Fucking piece of shit fuck, Tobirama. You scared me!” Madara rubs the sleepiness away from his face, once he registers the tiny figure standing beside his futon. “And how the hell did you break in, anyway? For fuck’s sake, Tobirama, you’re five. Stop being so competent.”

Tobirama sniffs. “I’m five, not stupid. And language.”

“What do you think you’re doing running around Konoha at this time of night? It’s dangerous! Especially for a kid like you! Does Hashirama even know you’re here? He’s going to come bounding here flailing and panicking–”

“I can’t sleep.”

Madara blinks at him in the darkness. “Pardon me?”

“I can’t sleep,” Tobirama repeats, before fidgeting where he stands. “I keep seeing my other memories, and there are – some of them are really bad. Really, really bad.”

Of course. Madara feels like an absolute buffoon for forgetting that five year old Tobirama does not have the same coping mechanism as a twenty-four year old Tobirama. And Madara does not wish the horrors that twenty-four year old Tobirama has seen even on his worst enemies.

“Why come to me?” Madara asks, tone gentle. “Wouldn’t Hashirama be better for these sort of things?”

“You said that you’re my obedient minion.”

That makes him raise one eyebrow. “And?”

“You said that my every wish is your command.” Tobirama folds his arms together. “Well my wish now is for you to beat down those dreams as my obedient minion. You’re scary – you have a scary face. You can scare them by glaring at them, like how you glare at brother sometimes.”

He must not smile. No matter how much bossy Tobirama makes him want to, or how much the idea that Madara is more infallible than Tobirama’s demons makes him want to preen. So, instead of squishing tiny Tobirama’s cheeks, Madara opens up the blanket of his futon, and concedes.

“Alright then. In you go.”

Tobirama perks up, and all but jumps into the blanket. He burrows into Madara – and like the sadist he is, he shoves his cold hands under Madara’s back, leeches all the warmth from Madara’s chest into his side, before sighing into Madara’s shoulder.

Madara sends one of his cats off to inform Hashirama of Tobirama’s whereabouts. By the time he finishes tucking the blanket around them, Tobirama is sound asleep.

-

A/N: Headcanon that Tobirama is one of those people that had chubby cheeks that turned razor sharp during puberty.  Now with a sequel!

[raendown]

Pairing: MadaraTobirama Word count: 4537 Chapter: 4/9 Rated: T+ Summary: When his brother disappears coming home from town Madara goes looking for him only for both to end up taken prisoner in a castle hidden by magic generations ago. The candelabras talk, the furniture sleeps, and a great white beast hides himself away in the eastern wing. As he uncovers the story behind this place and gets to know the last small group of ‘survivors’ Madara gradually makes a new home here in the least likely of places.

Follow the link or read it under the cut!

KO-FI and commission info in the header!

Chapter 4

Living outside of time was strange. Intellectually Madara knew that when he left the village it had been the rainy season and there was no reason to expect snow for several more months, later than the year before if the almanac was to be believed. Knowing that, it should have felt so much more odd to stand in the open doorway of the castle and stare out across snow covered grounds that looked closer to the heart of winter than the middle of autumn. He wondered for a moment if being bound to this place made him just a little more connected to the magic and therefore a little less surprised by things but cast that idea away rather quickly. That wasn’t what he wanted to dwell on today.

He’d gotten himself all nicely dressed in a pair of sturdy boots Hashirama dug up for him and one of the thick coats hanging in the room he shared with Izuna. The plan had been to walk around the edge of the grounds and see how far his binding would allow him to stray but now that he was here he felt almost exhausted just thinking about the effort.

Considering the lack of moving time Madara couldn’t be sure how long he’d been standing there in indecision when movement caught his eye and he turned his head to watch the beast himself come around the corner. Despite telling Kagami just a few days before that he didn’t mind if the damn thing roamed his own castle the meeting was still so unexpected Madara froze and could do nothing but stare until he was spotted in return, the creature pausing between one long step and the next. He met glowing red eyes and, incredibly, he first thought was ‘he looks sad’.

Whatever the beast’s thoughts were it seemed pretty obvious they had nothing to do with whether or not Madara looked sad. More than anything he looked like he was contemplating which spire to climb so he could throw himself off of it, though that might have been an effect of the deep brows his twisted face was cursed with, something Madara hoped had not been there when his face had been human – ostensibly. His mane of white hair shifted around him as it was pulled by the gentle wind and the slight movement made it a little easier to distinguish his shape from the equally white snow behind him. It was possible that his coloring was an effect of the curse. Considering what Madara had seen in that portrait, though, he would guess not.

“Finally came out of hiding?” he called, partly to break the silence and partly because he just didn’t know when to keep his mouth shut sometimes. He wasn’t surprised to see the creature frown.

“If my efforts towards making you more comfortable are so unappreciated I would be more than glad to forego them in the future.”

“Oh don’t be a grumpy idiot now,” Madara snapped. “You did enough of that the last two times I saw you. I think we both know at this point that you’re not going to eat my fingers for an afternoon snack so stop pretending.”

The creature snorted, blowing out a puff of steam in the chilly air around them. He stomped one of his hooves without really seeming to notice and settled in to a more natural stance than staying paused between steps had left him in. Madara considered him for a moment and then turned away to look around them with deliberate nonchalance. With his gaze focused a little closer to himself than the far distance he could see tracks his eyes must have passed over before, evidence that his present company had been out here for quite some time with the way they started in one direction and seemed to loop all the way around the building to where the beast was now coming from the opposite side.

“Been out here for a while huh?”

“An old habit from when I first began testing the boundaries of my imprisonment.”

Madara blinked. He really hadn’t expected them both to be out here doing the same thing. Without thinking about it he asked, “How far can we go?”

Even more surprisingly, he got an answer.

“To the west our borders reach just beyond the gardens. Our northern wall marks the edge in that direction. To the south we are granted some two miles of forest trails behind the stables and to the east we may alight on the shore beyond the lake but no farther.” The creature shook his head. “You will know you have reached the edge when you find yourself turning back against your own will.”

“Oh. I kind of thought it would be painful or something. Like a shock or a burn maybe.” Madara fought the urge to scratch at the back of his head awkwardly, feeling a little stupid for automatically assuming that.

“We suffer enough by being here,” was the only answer he got.

Feeling even more awkward now, Madara shifted his weight and half turned back towards the inside of the castle. “Right. I guess I don’t really need to go explore for myself now then. Waste of time. Look, like I said to the others, this is your home. So if you want to walk around or something don’t worry about bothering my brother and me. You don’t even have to talk to us or anything if you don’t want to.”

“That is unexpectedly kind of you.”

“Not really. Its common manners. I do understand those, you know. Except right now I’m going to ignore manners and go back inside so I’ll see you around maybe…uh…” Madara faltered when he realized he was about to call the thing ‘Beast’ as an actual title, something that might really have gotten him eaten.

It took a moment but the creature eventually seemed to realize the cause of his hesitation and narrowed red eyes in to a glare. “My name is Tobirama.”

Unable to decide how he wanted to deal with the revelation of knowing the monster’s name, Madara stumbled over a few half sentences which might have been strung together as a goodbye of some sort and fled back indoors. He hurried all the way up to the room where he was grateful to find Izuna missing. Today being a rare day when he felt well enough to move about on his own, Izuna had gone down to eat breakfast in the kitchen for once and actually socialize with their animated hosts. Madara was grateful not to be questioned as he removed all of his unused winter wear and proceeded to stomp circles around the beautiful carpet until his heart stopped racing inside of his chest.

He had spoken to his own jailor. Worse than that he hadn’t actually hated speaking to the thing. Or Tobirama, as was apparently the name he should have been using. Having a name for the twisted face did strange things to his mind and Madara realized that he was immediately thinking of Tobirama as more human just for being able to stop referring to him as ‘the beast’ or ‘the creature’. With a name instead of a scary title he no longer had over-exaggerated images come to mind of foot long teeth or hands so big they could crush his entire head in one fist. The reality of Tobirama was that he was half of a twisted monster, yes, but that the other half of him remained pathetically and painfully human. And Madara wasn’t sure what to do with that.

As had become his first instinct lately, he thought about going to talk to Hashirama about it. Surely one who had been here since before this whole mess started would have a few helpful insights. Then he thought the better of it and considered going over things with Izuna instead. His brother knew him better than anyone in the world, after all, and it might have been more helpful to talk to someone who would understand his reactions to everything. He was still undecided when he stepped out of the room and nearly leapt out of his skin at the squeaky panicked voice under his feet.

“Do not step upon me!” When he was able to see through the fright Madara looked down to find little Kagami scrambling out from underneath the path of his footsteps.

“What are you doing?” he demanded. “I almost squashed you like a bug!”

“I am so very sorry!”

Realizing he was still holding one foot up in the air, Madara set it down out of the way and shook his head. “You should be a little more careful about where you walk. He looks harmless but I’m pretty sure Hashirama would light me on fire in my sleep if I actually hurt you in any way.”

“He might weep for a very long time but I am certain Hashirama could never hurt you. The one you would really have to look out for is sensei!” Seeing him fall in to a more natural stance, Kagami hurried over and began scaling the seam on his pant leg, using folds as handholds until he was able to swing over and climb up to sit on Madara's shoulder uninvited.

“Comfortable?” Madara asked him dryly.

Kagami beamed. “Yes! Sensei is so tall I often get dizzy riding upon his heights. It is pleasing to see the Uchiha line has kept its traditional stature!”

“You know, you’re a kid and you still talk fancier than I do. I can’t decide if it’s just years of exposure without aging or if kids from your time really were just overly educated. Wait. In all the time I’ve been here I don’t think either of us has ever mentioned our last name. How did you know we’re Uchiha?” It was a legitimate question he thought. There had been a couple of occasions when they maybe should have given their family name to be polite but Madara had held back in the beginning because he didn’t want to be followed if he somehow escaped and then later there had been no reason to think about it anymore.

So it was weird to him that Kagami would know this without being told and he thought he was well within his rights to question it. He was quite surprised to see the little soldier looking back at him as though it was odd to have his knowledge questioned.

“How could I not recognize another of the Uchiha family? The hair alone is distinctive enough but the jaw and the nose too, it is as like as looking in a mirror!”

“You’re…an Uchiha?”

“Of course!”

“There are more of us!?”

Kagami blinked. “Are there none left?” he asked in a quiet voice.

“Not that I know of. Our parents never mentioned having any other relatives anywhere. We used to have three other siblings but none of them lived much past puberty. As far as I know it’s just us. And…you?” Madara tried to wrap his head around how long the family tree would have to be to connect him and the little boy on his shoulder who was somehow both younger and older than himself.

“There used to be dozens of Uchiha in this city. Before the sickness came our family was one of the most prominent, sworn to serve the royal line, and even I was already being groomed to stay away from potential brides who might not be good enough to marry in to our bloodline. When the Sannin Tsunade removed us from memory there would have been more than a dozen Uchiha left in the city. I thought they would have had children.” He hung his wooden head in sorrow and Madara looked away.

He’d known that the people inside the castle were stopped in time and that they had been watching each other fall in to permanent slumber one by one for years but it had never occurred to him that they might have had ties with people outside the magic as well, that they would have been forced to come to terms with the inevitable death of their missing loved ones. In a way he could almost relate.

“It’s not actually a city anymore,” he corrected, not sure how to keep the subject from getting any darker. “Where we live it’s just a village, barely even that really.”

“The peoples must have left when they could no longer remember what kept them there.” Kagami shifted and tugged at his own tin soldier hat thoughtfully.

“Hold on…”

When his face suddenly dropped the boy on his shoulder went as tense as a boy made of metal could. “What is it? Have I done wrong?”

“No I just…is that what happened to the other brothers?” He almost regretted his words when Kagami’s face fell.

“The two other royal brothers? Yes, that is what happened to them.” The boy sighed despondently. “Itama-sama and Kawarama-sama. Unfortunately they were both away from home when the magic was cast. As the youngest brothers they were expected to join the cavalry and they happened to be leading an official inspection of each border unit when the Great Sannin removed us from time; we can only assume they lived out the rest of their lives never knowing the family they were missing.”

“At least they had each other?” Madara tried.

“Oh yes! That is a very kind way to look at it! Thank you, cousin!”

That brought him up short again. Kagami shifted around and began to braid three tiny strands of his hair together while Madara worked his way through being addressed as cousin when he knew for sure the relationship would be wildly more complicated than that. After a few seconds he decided it wasn’t worth hashing out and finally changed the subject entirely.

“Did you need something? Or were you just wandering around the upper halls looking for something to do?”

“Indeed! I came to ask if you would please speak with my sensei,” Kagami said. “He has been most reluctant to come out of his rooms even after you said you didn’t mind and I was hoping you might tell him so again.”

Madara gave him a dubious look. He’d already said his piece; it wasn’t up to him to make sure the man of the house knew he was allowed to walk around in his own home. Especially not if that man was an honest to god King. Besides that, he had only just seen the creature that morning and had his entire world turned upside down just by learning its name so he wasn’t exactly in a big hurry to go and buddy up for a good conversation at the moment.

Spinning on his heel, Madara cupped the little toy on his shoulder so he wouldn’t fall off and carried both of them back in to his bedroom, crossing over to flop down on the bench where they could both see through the window. As he’d suspected, the view from here looked out over the gardens where Tobirama had managed to wander around and was currently pacing his way between rows of hedges. Kagami left off his braiding and clambered down Madara's arm to press both hands against the cold pane. He looked down at his sensei with painted lips turned down in a sad expression.

“I just saw him,” Madara explained. “I was going to figure out how big this gilded cage really is but I ran in to him at the entrance and he told me how far we can go in every direction. Then I kind of insulted him and left.”

“You insulted him?”

“Well I didn’t mean to! Do you know that no one hads ever bothered to mention his name until now? I didn’t know what to call him and I, er, I almost called him ‘beast’ right to his face.” He screwed up his face when Kagami turned to look at him, shocked. “I know! I know!”

“That must have truly hurt sensei’s feelings.”

Casting his gaze out the window at the forlorn figure wandering through the snow alone, Madara grunted. “Suppose I’ll have to make it up to him or whatever. That’s his whole thing right? The curse? Hashirama said that he saw himself as a monster for what he did during the plague so the witch lady cursed him to look like one. I wouldn’t want to be reminded of that either.”

“If only sensei would stop thinking that way things could go back to how they were,” Kagami said.

Still watching the slow steps and the way the wind pulled carelessly at Tobirama’s wild hair, it took a few seconds for Madara's brain to catch up with that. “What does that mean?”

“That is how sensei could end the curse if only he believed what we all know. The Lady Tsunade told him that if he could look in to a mirror and see himself as a human then all would be as it should. I think that is why he hides himself away. Not because he cannot look at himself but because he cannot look in to the eyes of everyone he believes he has let down by extending this shadow of a life. And the more years pass the more he believes he was right all along, that he has always been a monster.” Kagami let his words trail away in time with his stiff fingers sliding down the pane of glass and Madara finally realized why the odd story-telling cadence of the boy’s speech felt so out of place.

“You’re still trying to get me to go talk to him, aren’t you?”

“Sensei is lonely!” Kagami wailed, turning to fall against his arm and wrap around it with all four limbs. “It has been years since he met anyone new, I beg of you to spend a little time in his presence and help him to see that he is not a monster no matter what face he wears!”

Already frowning, Madara let the crease between his brows deepen a little. “Manipulation is not your strong suit, tiny soldier boy.”

“Does that mean that you will do it?”

“Shut up.”

Izuna returned shortly after that and their conversation turned to other things, mostly introducing his brother to the idea that they were somehow very distantly related to the only child left in the castle. In the end all three of them collectively decided that addressing each other as cousins was probably the easiest way to go.

For a few days after Madara was able to distract Kagami away from the subject whenever it came up, not quite ready to do as he knew he eventually would. His hesitance wasn’t so much out of any desire to stay farther away from his captor but rather it was born out of his utter lack of any idea what to say. How was he meant to convince Tobirama that he was still human inside when Madara himself saw little of that left in him? Of the few times he’d met the other he had seen only anger and a deep abiding sadness. Human qualities for sure but were they enough? Was that all there was to him?

At a certain point he couldn’t avoid it anymore – and Kagami realized he was being put off, which ended in him moping adorably in a corner for an hour, leaving Madara to explain to the others what he had agreed to do. He left the room to seek out the lord of the castle more to escape Hashirama's fire-hazard attempts of an enthusiastic hug than anything else. The dumb candle seemed way too happy about the prospect of everyone getting along together.

Saying he would speak with the lord of the castle and actually doing so were two different things, however, and it proved a little harder to track his quarry down when he didn’t really have any idea where to look. According to Kagami there was no one in the royal apartments. He didn’t really want to go tramping around in the snow but that was really his only other idea. With great reluctance he wandered down to the front hall, thinking that perhaps he might be able to spot the beast from the door again and save himself the trouble of going all the way upstairs to dress in warmer clothes. To his great luck both tasks were unnecessary.

Both him and his host stood rigid with surprise when they almost collided going around a corner. They stood blinking at each other for several seconds before Tobirama snorted and moved to step around him, jolting Madara in to action.

“I was just looking for you,” he said, somehow managing a casual tone.

“Were you?” Tobirama lifted both of his heavy brows and Madara fought the urge to scowl defensively.

“Look, if we’re going to spend an unknown number of years locked together in the same castle then maybe we should get to know each other or something. You can’t hide from me forever. That sounds boring.”

He lifted an eyebrow of his own as if to challenge the half-human standing more than a full foot above him and Tobirama stared back with narrowed eyes, clearly doubting his intentions but not willing to call him out just yet. Quite likely he had also been a victim of Kagami’s pep talks trying to force them to socialize with each other but Madara was willing to bet that Tobirama was too lonely to pass up the opportunity to make a new friend. And also probably too proud to admit that.

“If you think that is best,” Tobirama answered eventually. His words sounded awkward, chewed over and halting, like he wasn’t sure of them but had nothing else to say.

“Right, because you’re obvious super worried about what I think.”

The frown lines on Tobirama’s face deepened with frustration. “Do not look for insult where none was meant. I was agreeing with your proposal.”

“Alright, okay, I can play nice. Go on then.”

“Go-?” To his amusement, Tobirama stared at him with only more frustration. “You were the one who asked me to converse. Why should I be the one who must ‘go on then’?”

“You’re royalty; aren’t you royal types trained in how to socialize and stuff?” Madara asked.

“I do hope you’ll forgive me if my social skills are a bit out of practice after so long without meeting anyone new. One does tend to let one’s propriety slip when the only decent conversationalist around is my own brother. And his wife, of course, but unfortunately Mito and I have not been on good terms for the past decade or thereabouts.” Tobirama wrinkled his nose, the face of a man remembering a wrong he’d committed but wasn’t ready to apologize for.

Sensing a good story behind that, Madara was about to ask for a retelling of whatever Tobirama had done to insult Mito a decade or so ago. Clearly it had nothing to do with their general situation since that had happened more than several decades ago as far as he could tell. Before he could ask, however, the rest of that little speech caught up with his brain and Madara nearly lost his jaw as it fell open.

“Wait. Your brother. Hashirama is your brother!?”

“Yes.”

Reeling back, Madara gripped both sides of his head and stared in to the middle distance. “My whole life is a lie. Oh my god he’s the elder brother in the story. Hashirama caught the plague and then a magic lady saved him but she didn’t save anyone else and you had to – oh damn. Wow.”

Tobirama watched judgmentally but thankfully in silence as Madara went through all the general stages of a mental breakdown. He’d known the story since day one, accepted all of it as true in the meantime, but the story Hashirama and Mito told him just hadn’t felt real until he realized he’d been staring all the characters of it in the face this whole time. Hashirama was the eldest brother, the one who was meant to be king, who had apparently not falling in to the long sleep. And in front of him was Tobirama, doomed to watch his older sibling live out life as an animated candelabra because of mistakes he had made during a reign that was never supposed to be his in the first place.

“Fire and flame,” Madara swore under his breath. “Your life sucks.” He said it without thinking, without aim, so the bark of laughter that sprang out of his companion nearly startled him right out of his skin.

“If you wish to put it in such crass terms, yes.”

“Shit, no, I didn’t mean to bring anything up! Crap. See this is why I don’t talk to anyone either!” If his trousers had pockets Madara would have shoved his hands down deep and hiked up his shoulders uncomfortably. Without pockets he could only fold his arms and pout.

Above him, Tobirama cocked his head to one side with a shadow of what might be translated in to a smile.

“Perhaps the two of us might find some common ground after all,” he said.

“Maybe. Come on, let me drag you back to the kitchen so Hashirama can get all the weepy gratitude out of his system and then we can go sit down somewhere and tell each other our favorite colors or something." Madara beckoned with one hand and was gratified when Tobirama followed placidly, not a hint of kingly pride balking at being told what to do. That was a good sign.

Keeping stride with Tobirama’s massive legs turned out easier said than done and Madara had to power walk for a couple of hallways until his companion rather shamefacedly shortened his steps. As they neared the kitchens he looked down with a hesitant expression.

“You do not actually expect us to make such simplistic conversation as trading favorite colors, do you?”

“If that’s what it takes to make you less grumpy,” Madara declared. “How else am I supposed to get to know you if we don’t ask questions or something?”

“Pray think of something a little more interesting.”

Without thinking Madara rolled his eyes and stuck out his tongue, a response he usually reserved for Izuna or Hashirama, the people he actually felt comfortable joking around with knowing he wouldn’t insult them. Then since he couldn’t snap his tongue back in to his face without making himself look even more foolish he did his best to play it off like he was completely comfortable teasing a seven foot cursed king who trapped him here with a magically binding vow. Incredibly, he did not get stomped to death by two sharp hooves.

Somehow his casual attitude seemed to break a little more of the tension between them and as he reached for the door to go face Hashirama together Madara almost smiled, thinking to himself that maybe being locked in a castle with a mythical creature wasn’t quite as terrible as it sounded.

[raendown]

Pairing: MadaraTobirama + HashiramaIzuna Word count: 1720 Soulmate au: The one where everyone can shape shift to a unique animal form at will but if your soulmate demands you change form you are forced to

Follow the link or read it under the cut!

Chapter 180: Madara/Tobirama + Hashirama/Izuna

Izuna slipped one leg off the tree branch he was perched upon and let it dangle beneath him to counterbalance the weight he was leaning forward, abdominals twisting side to side as he tried to find a better angle to stare through the leaves.

“Are they even still fighting?” he asked. “They’re not making very much noise and that sort of worries me.” From the branch just above him Hashirama sighed that special long-suffering sigh that could only come from years of siblinghood.

“Tobi’s changed forms. Madara’s trying to stare him down but you know how stubborn he is.”

“You mean how stubborn they both are,” Izuna corrected him.

With one more twist he finally found a break in the leaves the peer through, spying on the two idiots across the field. Their brothers had been arguing for the better part of the afternoon and it was hard to keep up with exactly what they were butting heads over since the topic seemed to fluctuate by the minute. Izuna was at least somewhat sure they had started today’s bickering fit when Madara tried to find fault with Tobirama’s kata stance – which was, of course, as flawless as it had ever been. From there they had gone through faulty paperwork, clan deficiencies, general hygiene, and mental capabilities.

They were in top form, actually. Hashirama had remarked over an hour ago that he wished they could put half as much effort in to their lacking personal lives as they did in to these pointless bicker fests and Izuna was still snickering about it. It was a fairly common opinion that they fought so much because they enjoyed it.

“So.” With a sly grin that many would assume him incapable of, Hashirama leaned forward and placed a hand on Izuna’s shoulder. “Shall we take bets on who gives in first this time?”

“Aren’t you supposed to be laying off the gambling habit? Didn’t Mito say something to you last week about that?”

Hashirama drooped. “I regret letting her marry my cousin. They have been terrible influences on each other and all they do lately is gang up on me!” Grumbling inaudibly, he slid off his branch and came down to squat right in Izuna’s line of view, peering out through the same spot he had been while at the same time giving Izuna a delicious view of his backside.

“Now I can’t see,” Izuna grumbled for the sake of keeping up appearances. The words were half-hearted at best.

“You’re not missing much. Madara’s shaking one of his fingers at Tobi but – oh, no, now he’s waving them both around because Tobi yawned in his face. That has so much more attitude when he’s a cat; I think it’s the big tongue. Do you think all snow leopards have such big tongues?”

“How should I know?”

Nonplussed, Hashirama turned back to shrug at him. “Should we go separate them then?”

“I suppose so. Otherwise they’ll be out here all night and Madara promised he’d take a turn cooking dinner for once.”

The two of them swung down from the tree in synch and Izuna tried not to be obvious about how distracting it was watching the ease of grace with which Hashirama moved. For such a clumsy man he sure was beautiful in motion, especially on the battlefield. There wasn’t much need to search for a distraction, though, since the moment they started across the field was the moment Madara finally lost his temper and sank down to the level of childish demands.

“Change back!” he shouted, clearly not expecting any sort of actual response. All four of them were startled beyond belief when Tobirama’s form contracted and suddenly he was human again, half crouched in the spot he’d just been lounging and staring up at Madara with a gaping jaw. Madara stared back. “You…changed back?”

“I didn’t mean to,” Tobirama breathed. Knowing what those words implied, Madara swayed on the spot.

“But you…and I’m…so we–?”

“Yeah. Something like that.”

Madara nodded slowly, eyes so wide they were ready to fall out of his head despite the medical chakra that had secured them in place a year ago. If he lost those eyes after Izuna went to all the trouble of convincing him to swap then he was in for a temper tantrum the likes of which Konohagakure had not yet seen.

Eventually Madara seemed to gather himself enough to remember their surroundings – and the two spectators watching from the tree line. By the scowl on his face he clearly did not appreciate having such a precious moment witnessed by others. Tobirama still looked pretty dazed when Madara grabbed him by the arm and began to pull him away to somewhere a little more private, allowing himself to be led around and tripping over his own feet while he tried to force his brain to process what was happening. When they reached the far side of the field they stopped, murmuring to each other, regrettably too quiet to be overheard.

Somewhere in that conversation they must have forgotten the entire point of moving away. Or perhaps one of them decided that he was too impatient to wait for a more private venue to present itself. Whatever the case, Madara was grinning like a fool when he went in for a kiss without warning, turning and bolting away with a smug expression as he changed forms to leap up in to the trees.

“You can’t just do that without warning me!” Tobirama shouted at his back before slipping in to his own secondary form, snow leopard chasing after lion with his teeth bared playfully. Distant yowls and the sounds of snapping branched drifted from that direction for several minutes after they left until finally the forest fell suspiciously quiet. Tobirama, apparently, had made a successful catch.

Izuna blinked in the spot where they had both disappeared, murmuring under his breath, “Well I wasn’t expecting that.”

Before Hashirama could spew any nonsense about always knowing their brothers were meant to be – he could see it in the man’s eyes but surely not even someone like him could have predicted that two people who were at each other’s throats so much were destined for each other – Izuna cleared his throat and cast about for something to distract them both. As nosy as he usually was with his brother’s disastrous love life, he very much did not want to know how that conversation with Tobirama was going to end. Some things he just didn’t want to hear about.

“Wild, huh? You know I’m kind of surprised that neither of them tried that before.” As he spoke Izuna gently turned Hashirama around and set the man on a path back through the strip of forest that provided a natural barrier between trainings ground and village.

“You know, now that you mention it, me too.” Hashirama hummed and watched the sky as he walked, only half aware as he was steered away from waltzing straight in to a thick maple. “They both really like to yell. And Tobi does like to get out of arguments by just changing his form and going to sleep. It’s very surprising that it took this long for Madara to use those words.”

“He’s an idiot, what can I say?” Izuna snickered to himself and then dodged the fondly exasperated swipe of Hashirama’s hand.

In silence they wandered, following the path already worn through the loam by hundreds of shinobi taking the same route through the forest to get in their daily exercise. After a few minutes Izuna let his thoughts drift and he had already distracted himself watching a nest of newborn robins cheep cheeping for their dinner when Hashirama began to chuckle to himself.

“Did you see Tobi’s face?” he giggled.

“That dumb look of shock.” Izuna tried to imitate it without cracking a smile. “Gasp! How can it be you!?” Making Hashirama laugh felt a little like triumph.

“Yes! And then Madara’s face! He should be more careful of his words.” Hashirama looked over and pulled his face down in to his best approximation of Madara’s grumpy scowl, pitching his voice higher to try and match the other man’s irritated shriek. “Change!”

Izuna didn’t have time to laugh. Before he could do more than blink something in his gut pulled until he thought his very soul might come flying out of his mouth. When the feeling passed he shook his head violently and looked up at Hashirama, suddenly so much taller. Embarrassingly, it took a few moments for it to sink in what had just happened but when it did he was hopping around in small circles, unable to contain the massive wave of emotions in just this small body of a fan-tailed raven.

“Um…Izuna? You...did you mean to change?”

Falling still, Izuna shook his hard little beak from side to side. After a moment he realized that he was very free to change back to his other form despite Hashirama’s demand having forced him in to this one so he did that, flowing back in to human shape with barely a thought. Then he stood with both arms hanging loosely at his sides without a clue what to say. Luckily Hashirama had never been the sort of person who ran out of words.

“Are we soulmates too?” he asked in a breathy voice.

“I guess we are…” It was hard to believe despite the evidence of the change he had gone through involuntarily.

“Oh. Wow. Izuna, this is…this is amazing!”

Without any further warning Hashirama threw himself forward, catching Izuna around the middle to lift him up in the air for a tight bear hug and jabbering about how happy he was with the unexpected match. Getting swung back and forth through the air like a rag doll made him feel a little like a child but Izuna couldn’t bring himself to be all that upset about it. Not only had his secret crush turned out to be his soulmate. Not only did Hashirama actually seem excited that it was him.

But it looked as though Madara would be a bit too distracted over the next few days to interfere with the first few steps they took to figuring out their relationships. Life really was being kind to him lately.

[raendown]

Even when he catches a break Madara just can’t catch a break. 

Pairing: MadaraTobirama Word count: 2945 Story summary: Madara used to be a man feared even by those of his own clan. Life's really changed since the village was built. Among those changes is his relationship with one Senju Tobirama - and apparently everyone else knew about this even before he did.

Follow the link or read it under the cut!

Chapter 5

Madara was not proud of the noise he made upon waking up the next morning. He wasn’t exactly ashamed of it, per se, but he definitely could not be said to be proud. Although, he thought it was a rather reasonable reaction and that anyone else would likely do the same upon discovering that they had spent the night in bed with Senju Tobirama – and that at some point during that night both himself and Tobirama had drifted towards each other and were now cuddled up together like a sweet old married couple.

He wasn’t panicking, honest.

Staying still was harder than it should have been for a trained shinobi yet Madara felt that it was absolutely necessary. If he moved then he might disturb the younger man. And if he disturbed him then he would stop making the most adorable snuffling sounds Madara had ever heard in his life.

Tobirama mewled in his sleep, burrowing his face deeper in to the chest he seemed to think was his pillow. They were both lying on their sides facing each other yet somehow Madara had ended up with his head on the actual pillows and Tobirama had slid nearly halfway down the bed. He wasn’t so much tucked under the older man’s chin as he was curled around him with three limbs, the fourth fisted in his shirt as his nose pressed in to Madara’s sternum. With every fourth or fifth breath he would twitch and make a tiny sound. What sound he made varied between quiet little huffs, adorable mewls, or soft snuffles as though he were trying to determine what his human pillow smelled like.

If it were possible, Madara thought his very heart might be melting inside his chest. All of him might be melting for all he knew. He wanted time to stop so he could stare forever at the way Tobirama’s cheeks were smooshed out of shape by the position he’d squirmed himself in to. His house had been overrun with children for months now and not a single one of them could come even slightly close to how cute the sight before him was right now. How was he supposed to deal with this?

No answer came to him at the moment but he did understand that no matter his personal wishes time was not going to stop. Eventually the man pressed to his chest was going to wake up and whatever scene followed after would likely involved blushing, yelling, stuttering, and flailing – probably all from himself, admittedly. Without stopping to consider the implications Madara allowed a spark of chakra to flood his eyes, activating his Sharingan and committing this moment to memory forever. He very carefully did not think about what doing such a thing implied or how it might be taken. It was the most adorable thing he’d ever seen; who wouldn’t want to remember this?

Unfortunately for the peace of the morning, two things happened simultaneously then. Even that small spike in his chakra set off Tobirama’s senses, bringing him instinctually out of sleep, and at the exact same time Kagami gave a hungry cry from the other room. Madara froze like a deer as his bedpartner cracked both eyes ever so slightly, then stared in continued awe at the wide yawn that followed after. Even his yawn was adorable. How?

“Mmmmppphhrrrrr.”

Madara blinked. “What?”

Tobirama blinked back at him with an uncomprehending expression in his half-lidded eyes. “Mm?”

“What did you-? Never mind. Can I, uh, get up?”

The younger man hummed sleepily before slowly unwinding his limbs from around Madara, freeing him but also leaving him oddly cold. Which, he reasoned, was obviously the only reason they had both ended up in such a position. Not having the energy to cover themselves with blankets the night before had left them cold and both had unconsciously sought out the closest source of heat. Mystery solved. The only plausible explanation.

Both of them rolled themselves out of the bed, Tobirama heading instinctively for the crying child while Madara watched and shook his head in bewilderment. He followed behind slowly and walked in to the spare bedroom just as Kagami stopped crying. He looked better this morning, his skin no longer so flushed and dry.

“Good morning little one,” Tobirama murmured with another wide yawn. He reached in to the crib to lift the child out and when they both cooed at the same time Madara had to turn around and leave step out again. He couldn’t handle them both at the same time so early in the morning.

Instead he retreated to the kitchen and went straight for the coffee pot. He was a warrior, he reminded himself. He’d been bred for nothing but blood and combat since almost before he could walk. Witnessing countless deaths and grievous injuries had long since hardened him and he would not fall to pieces because one man and one baby were more cute than he knew what to do with.

Honestly he was starting to think this was a losing battle. Not that he was about to give in to anything.

Tobirama drifted in to the kitchen shortly after the coffee was done. In an act of grumpy defiance, Madara only made a cup for himself and didn’t even offer to pour one for his guest. He looked a little too busy to notice, though, as he entered the room with a look of confused thoughtfulness on his face and a babbling Kagami in his arms.

“Did I sleep in your bed?” he asked. Madara harrumphed and ducked his face down to stir his coffee.

“Yes,” he admitted shortly. Tobirama gave that a moment of thought, bouncing the baby on his hip. Thinking he was safe for a moment, Madara took his first sip of glorious premium brew.

“Did we snuggle?”

Madara choked on his first sip of glorious premium brew.

“Snuggle? Why would we-? You think-! I would never-!” Despite starting quite a few sentences, nothing of substance managed to find its way out as he spluttered and reached for a towel to wipe up the spray he’d just gotten everywhere in his shock. Tobirama tilted his head.

“I’ll take that as a yes,” he said.

“Hmph!”

It was hard to ignore the weird smile Tobirama was giving him. Were he anyone else he would have said it looked like a fond smile but he could think of no reason for the younger man to direct such a look at someone like him. Madara scowled back as darkly as he could and stormed down the hallway to throw the coffee covered towel in the laundry. The smell of it added very little to the heap of vomit stained cloths and sheets. Whichever poor unlucky soul collected his laundry this morning was going to get a nasty surprise, he noted.

Upon returning to the kitchen he made sure to stick his nose as far in to the air as it would go and pointedly still not offer any coffee. Frustratingly, Tobirama ignored him and simply poured a cup for himself without asking. The younger man rooted through every single mug in his cupboard before finally selecting one with a pattern of little blue flowers on it, albeit with a reluctant expression. Madara wasn’t sure what was so distasteful about his mug collection but didn’t bother to ask. Even if he wanted to he wouldn’t have had time because it was right then that he noticed something he hadn’t before, something which sent him right back out of the room once again.

Tobirama was still wearing his shirt.

Madara felt his breath catching in his chest as he practically fell in to his bedroom and threw the door shut behind himself. Did the man have no decency, wandering around in other people’s clothing? Did he not have a single clue what he looked like with an Uchiwa printed across his shoulder blades? He looked as though he belonged there in Madara’s kitchen, drinking his coffee without a care in the world and rooting through the fridge for some milk to give to little Kagami.

It wasn’t fair. The day hadn’t even started yet so why did he already feel like he needed to crawl back in to bed? Madara made certain that his annoyance was audible as he changed out of yesterday’s clothes, slamming drawers and stomping his feet. Stupid Tobirama. Why was he even here?

Very carefully avoiding the thought that he was the one who had invited the younger man here in the first place and convinced him to stay, Madara grumped his way to the kitchen once more to tell him that he had overstayed his welcome and should probably leave. His plans were foiled when Tobirama smiled at him and asked if he should cook breakfast or did Madara want to try to make something.

“I can make food myself,” he said, the tips of his ears going pink.

“Of course,” Tobirama agreed graciously. Kagami cooed his own agreement as he was slid in to his highchair, bottle clutched tightly in both hands.

He tried, he really honestly did. He’d thought eggs would be simple enough even though they weren’t something he would normally make. After a minute or so he could see that something wasn’t quite right but he couldn’t put his finger on what. They just didn’t look how he thought they were supposed to, how they had the one time he’d watched Izuna cook them. Tobirama seemed to catch on that something was wrong when Madara peeked at him surreptitiously. He wanted to know what he’d done wrong but he didn’t want to ask. Luckily his guest was kind enough to offer.

“What’s the matter?”

“The eggs didn’t do it right.” Madara wasn’t sure why Tobirama had to bite his lip. Maybe they were sore or something.

“Here, let me see.”

He shuffled to one side to allow the younger man to stand beside him and peek in to the pot he had on the stove. Yet, instead of any comments or advice, silence greeted him. Almost a full minute went by before Tobirama slowly took a deep breath in.

“What is it you were trying to make?” he asked.

“Boiled eggs,” Madara said. “Obviously.”

“Did you….crack the eggs in to the water?”

“Of course I did! You can’t eat the shell, why would I leave them in there?” Leaning over, he peeked inside the pot for himself. “But they don’t look the same as when Izuna did it. I don’t know how he managed to get them to keep their shape.”

Madara startled when a hand landed on his wrist, his lips parting but no words coming out as he stared dumbly at the man beside him. Tobirama carefully twisted the oversized spoon out of his grasp and steered him to the side.

“Why don’t I show you? I’ll explain it as we go along.”

Ten minutes later Madara proudly presented a plate of boiled eggs to Kagami to showoff what he had managed to do all by himself with no help thank you. The baby giggled and poked one of them, rolling it about while Madara looked on happily. One of them got squished when Kagami got it under his fist and squeezed but that was alright, he had more to eat. Tobirama watched them both from the stove where he was dumping out the water, smiling that same strange smile he’d worn earlier.

After breakfast Tobirama took Kagami’s temperature and compared the number to what it had been last night.

“Looks like his fever broke. Good.” One hand ruffled the child’s already thick hair. “He’ll be fine. You, I have some doubts about but you’ll survive at the very least. I should get home.”

“Hmph. I’ve survived just fine for this long. I don’t need fancy food like boiled eggs.”

“Fancy-?” Tobirama stopped midsentence to shake his head and chuckle. “Sure thing Madara. Don’t forget about the meeting with the representative from the Shimura clan this afternoon. I’m sure I’ll see you there.”

Before he left he bent down to buss Kagami on the cheek, eliciting wild laughter and reaching hands. He tickled one of the palms trying to catch him before sending Madara a vague wave and then flickering away as though he’d never been there. It took Kagami a bit to realize he was gone but the moment he did the sniffles started and Madara could practically see the wails building up. He sighed, trying not to focus on how he felt oddly the same way.

Surprisingly, the crying abated after a little while. Madara refused to believe that it had anything to do with him actually following some of the advice Tobirama had given him about taking care of the bitty bugger. Just because he knew how to swaddle him properly now and how to hold him the right way when carrying him from place to place meant nothing. Those kinds of things couldn’t possibly have bearing on anything. The thing was a child; he wasn’t even smart enough to notice those things yet.

“So what is it then, hm?” Despite the fact that he was being spoken to, Kagami didn’t even turn his head from where he was very seriously contemplating the color of the ceiling. “You’re just warming up to me I guess. I am pretty awesome. I’m your clan Head, you know, so you should respect me.”

Kagami hiccupped but didn’t pay him much more attention than he already had been.

Both of them looked over when the front door opened. For a moment Madara thought Tobirama had forgotten something and come back for it and was already preparing some clever remark to say about it. He shrank when Izuna came in instead. His brother’s shoulders were hunched and his nose red where it peeked out from above the scarf he had wrapped tightly around his neck. The accessory choice was odd considering it was barely in to autumn. It wasn’t really cold enough for scarves yet.

“I’m dying,” Izuna slurred out. He sounded surprisingly nasally. Madara showed him no more sympathy than Hashirama had shown for him when he said the same thing.

“You look pretty alive to me. I don’t see you bleeding anywhere so what’s the problem?”

“What a cruel brother I have, to welcome me home from a mission so uncaringly.”

Madara snorted. “This isn’t your home; it’s mine. So what’s wrong with you that you need to come fishing for sympathy before you’ve even made it back to your own house?”

“I’m sick,” Izuna whined. Madara brightened.

“Oh! I know what to do for that!”

His brother glared at him for looking happy all of a sudden but Madara paid him no mind. He set the baby down in the playpen Tobirama had set up – what a good idea! – and hurried away. When he came back with a large glass of water Izuna raised one eyebrow, looking at him suspiciously before taking it with obvious reluctance in his movements.

“Okay…explain.”

“You’re sick! You have to stay hydrated!”

“Alright then.” Izuna sipped at the water, closing his eyes momentarily in relief as it cooled his throat. Then he popped them back open to ask, “Anything else, Doctor Madara?”

“Bed rest! You’re supposed to sleep a lot, apparently. At least, that’s what Tobirama said was good for Kagami but he said something about doing the same as I would for myself so I guess it applies to adults too.”

“There it is.” Izuna smirked.

Madara scrunched his nose as he checked to make sure Kagami was playing alright in his playpen.

“There what is?”

“You learned all that from Tobirama. I should have known. Should I assume he spent some time here last night?” In Madara’s opinion, there was no need for the suggestive wiggling of eyebrows that he was being faced with right then.

“What of it? He is supposed to be a genius,” he pointed out. “It would be rather stupid of me not to take the opportunity it learn from someone with such a high intellect.”

Izuna howled with laughter – or tried to, anyway. He’d only just gotten started before he set off a coughing fit which nearly knocked him off his own two feet. Madara looked on feeling slightly vindicated. Even Izuna’s own body knew he shouldn’t be making fun of his elders and betters.

“The irony,” Izuna wheezed eventually. “Oh my god the irony is actually killing me.”

“See if I bring you any more water,” Madara grumbled. Just for spite, he snatched away the glass he’d brought over out of the goodness of his own heart. Not at all to show off all the new things he had learned.

“Can I be best man at your wedding? I’ll look away when you two kiss, I promise!”

“Shut up! We’re not getting married! I don’t like him! Shut up!”

“You already told me to shut up!” Izuna wheezed out another laugh, prompting Madara to throw one of the couch pillows at him.

“I hope you die of sickness!” he shouted.

He didn’t have to stand here and listen to this, especially not in his own home. Madara gathered Kagami up and retreated down the hallway but he only made it halfway before Izuna’s voice floated down after him to tickle his ears and stiffen his spine.

“I’m sure Tobirama will be only too happy to comfort you in your time of need!”

Although he never got around to confirming it, Madara was fairly sure they heard his bellow of rage on the other side of the village.