#ivy hisselpenny

[gothiccharmschool]

Giant hat!

[gothiccharmschool]

I need this hat. Obviously.

Chanel - Fall 1997 Couture

[ghost-inacup]

Would anyone be interested in a gail carriger's books' discord server?

please tell me cause i dont want to put in more effort than i have to before exams

[quoteablebooks]

"I'm am very sorry to say that I did not observe the interaction." "A disappointment for you, I'm sure, for he was a remarkably fine specimen." "Oh, my, Alexia, you shouldn't say such things! You're a married woman." "True, but not a dead one."

Ivy Hisselpenny (Tunstell) and Lady Alexia Maccon Timeless by Gail Carriger

[thisistab]

When I crafted the “Bunny Day Dress and Hat” in ACNH, I expected a pastel trainwreck.

But this made me laugh in equal parts glee and horror.

After I got my breathing back under control, an obsessive thought circled the drain in my brain.

“Ivy Tunstell (née Hisslepenny) owns that hat.”

I have no excuse for the dress. I apologize for nothing. 

You can all suffer with me. 

[iambickentameter]

“Ivy Hisselpenny was the unfortunate victim of circumstances that dictated she be only-just-pretty, only-just-wealthy, and possessed of a terrible propensity for wearing extremely silly hats.” - Soulless, Gail Carriger.

Hat closeup!!!

#victorian #1870sfashion #hat #hatmaking #gailcarriger #soulless #ivyhisselpenny

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A post shared by Ken McCubbin (@ken_mccubbin)

It should be bigger. It should be bolder. But the structural integrity of the hat disagreed.

[darkandstormyranger]

aaaaand Miss Ivy Hisselpenny

[fine-art-of-finishing-others]

Couple of Sophronia and Ivy sketches I made tonight while babysitting! Figured I’d share

[sevennbees]

@gailcarriger this is so very Ivy

take your carriage very slowly by your rival’s home, that she might see your latest hat

[gothiccharmschool]

The theme of the event is Edwardian, you say? Maybe I should fancy up a hat.

[ayzrules]

rules: name 10 favorite characters from 10 different things and then tag 10 people (s/o @vampirkaninchen for tagging <3)

Ivy Hisselpenny/Tunstell (Parasol Protectorate series)

Dimity Plummeigh-Teignmott or whatever it is (Finishing School series)

Marco (Animorphs series)

Sansa Stark (ASOIAF books - i’ve never fucked w the show)

Leorio Palidknight whatever i cannot spell (Hunter x Hunter)

Nishinoya (Haikyuu)

Uncle Iroh (ATLA)

Dr Doofenshmirtz (Phineas & Ferb)

Lin Beifong (Korra)

Aunt Polly (Peaky Blinders)

tagging: @morningstar1399 @bebemoon @interluxetumbra @atimefordragons @forebodinq @now-on-elissastillstands @itsprettystabbybaby +whoever else wants to

[quoteablebooks]

"Ooh, ooh, ooh!" Ivy was practically bouncing in excitement over some kind of revelation. "I had a thought," she said, examining the edge of the wooden stake with interest. "Oh, yes?" encouraged Alexia loudly. Ivy stopped and frowned, her pert little face creased in worry. "I said I had one. It appears to have vanished."

Ivy Hisselpenny (Tunstell) and Lady Alexia Maccon Timeless by Gail Carriger

[weepingwillowyangel]

Hands down one of THE BEST series ever written. The spin-off series' are also very good.

A series that I'm surprised that Tumblr doesn't talk more about

The Parasol Protectorate Series by Gail Carriger

consists of 5 books (Soulless, Changeless, Blameless, Heartless, and Timeless) and features a good amount of MOGII characters, and a large variety of female characters. It is lacking in PoC characters and characters that are explicitly not part of the gender binary or trans, though, I’ll not deny that.

but really can we talk about the ladies!

first the main character Alexia Tarabotti: spinster long on the shelf, soulless, and *gasp shock horror* Half-Italian. The way that she is described is having black curly hair and “swarthy” skin (despite how the comic adaptation has her pale as any of the other characters). While Carriger specifically describes Alexia as having a “Mediterranean” skin color, the amount of emphasis that is placed on how different Alexia looks from her half-siblings and other ladies of society makes me think that Alessandro Tarabotti (Alexia’s presumed dead father) himself had Moorish ancestry that got passed on to Alexia along with the soulless state. Heterosexual (mostly, considering her reactions to one of the ladies she later meets)

Ivy Hisselpenny: Alexia’s best friend who has a rather poor, to say the least, taste in hats. But under the over affectation of being the absolute silliest person in the room, Ivy does have some smarts, she just does not express it as one would find conventional. Heterosexual.

Angelique: a former drone (human servant of a vampire/vampire hive who is bidding for immortality and/or patronage) of the Westminster vampire hive who becomes Alexia’s ladies maid. French, and revealed to be lesbian or possibly bisexual. 

Genevieve Lefoux: French inventor and milliner who as a preference for wearing her hair short and dressing in mens clothing tailored to herself. Very obviously a lesbian. 

Sidheag Maccon: a great battle axe of a lady in her late 30’s who, if possible, is blunter than Alexia. the most muscular woman in the entire series (almost has to be considering her self imposed job). 

for the male and homosexual characters, one need not look further than the fashionable Lord Akeldama, one of the oldest Rove vampires in London, who decorates his house in the hight of Rococo style and speaks with italics.  He also has a bevvy of drones who are all implied to also be homosexual. including…

Biffy: Lor Akeldama’s “head drone” you could say, who’s sexuality is a bit more explicit than implied and who is also very exactingly competent. 

On the werewolf side, there is Professor Randolf Lyall, the reserved and intellectual beta wolf of the Woolsey pack. He’s heavily implied to have an attraction to men, and implication which is later confirmed as you read the rest of the series. 

[manifestoonmoralmanlove]

Gormless Ch. 1 - Alexia’s Thug Fuck Quest

A well-meaning friend gave me a book series that is hilariously bad.  The first book was Souless and my riffs were entitled brainless. This second book is entitled Changless and these riff are then gormless.

I mean to say I have entitled them gormless! Not that my riffs are dumb, and the effort I spend on them stupid since I’m the only one who enjoys them. HAHA!

The story is SUPPOSED TO be about how a badass lady hits baddies with her umbrella and bangs her hot werewolf husband.  In reality it’s mostly poor attempts at being witty, flirty, and superior.

For the last book check out the brainless tag.

If you want the TL;DR version but want to read these new riffs anyway?

This story is set in supernatural Victorian steampunk England.  Alexia is our NOT LIKE OTHER GIRLS protag.  She is a soulless, which means she’s able to negate the abilities of vampires and werewolves by touching them. She’s recently married a big oaf, named Lord Connel Maccon.  He is an important werewolf man.  Their relationship is mostly arguments about how Maccon can’t tell her fucking anything.  Alexia has also recently become head of ~Soulless affairs~ in Queen Victoria’s government.  She also has a family full of evil women.  These women are evil because they do the same shit Alexia does...but like...while blonde.

Chapter 1 - Alexia’s Thug Fuck Quest

So the last book opened with Alexia dispatching a vampire at a ball. I can admit that’s a good intro. It catches your attention.

This one opens with her husband (Maccon) being woken up early to head into work. You ever in that situation? Hardly pulse-pounding.  Okay I’m being a bit glib.  He is head of the Supernatural (BUR) police and it’s an emergency. However we’re only given vague details, and when he refuses to tell his wife the vibe is not ~I don’t want her to panic~ but rather she’ll find out about it at her meeting tonight anyway.  Again, that doesn’t exactly leave you excited.  Despite the incident sounding severe, he doesn’t seem upset or in much of a rush.  He putz about getting ready, and plays a bit of tonsil-hockey with her before he heads out.

This scene does have to give us a bunch of exposition but I still think it could have been tightened up considerably.  Alexia eventually staggers outside to be surprised to see a bunch of werewolves from Maccon’s pack setting up on the lawn. This upsets Alexia, cause she’s gonna host a party in a few days. (This party never actually happens by the by.) But I mean GOSH! How untoward of them!  Her husband has not and will continue to not tell her fucking anything because they both don’t have functioning brains.

She’s confronted by Major handsome handsome of the studly handsomes, that being (his real name) Channing Channing of the Chesterfield Channings.  This isn’t even a funny name.  Where’s Luke the Duke? Major Minor? Have you not heard the Earl of Sandwich is full of Bologna? Are any of these GOOD jokes? Not really but they’re more fun than just having a stroke while masturbating to the bland brick, known as Channing Tatum.

However, this guy is not only physically attractive but he’s a violent, condescending, nitwit, so totally Alexia and by extension every woman’s type.  He assumes she’s a servant, tells her not to worry her purdy widdle head, and that if she’s good he might fuck her later. Alexia starts bashing him over the head with her umbrella.  They make a clear point to say that, since he’s a werewolf and she doesn’t have supernatural strength that this assault would not actually hurt him in any way.  Which, like, I can get behind that. Dude was being a jackoff, so he should totally get a whap to the noggin that could not possibly actually hurt him.  But because violent men are hot, he responds by almost striking her.  Luckily one of Maccon’s male servants Tunstell intervenes.  He smacks Tunstell, and then begins to turn into a wolf in order to ~discipline~ them both.  

We have to make a note here that even as a wolf he’s totally hot.  Unnecessary and inappropriate book! UNNECESSARY AND INAPPROPRIATE!   As he lunges at them, Professor Lyall (Maccon’s 2nd in command) and also in wolf form, intervenes and wins.  The two transform back to humans.  Lyall explains that she’s Maccon’s wife not servant.  So Channing is humiliated and the pack goes to set up their tents on the back lawn instead of the front.  Apparently Channing is the 3rd in command of the pack, he does not get along with Lyall or Maccon but acts mostly respectable to them, and they’re back early from some military excursion due to something ~irregular on a boat.~  But of course we don’t care about that.  Alexia inquires if Channing would actually be down with fucking her. However Lyall tells her to not fuck him.  She’s like, “Why?”

DAMN GIRL ARE YOU FOR REAL? She was way into marrying her husband, we’re told in text they’re in love and having lots of great sex. They’ve only been married monogamously for like a month, she’s never had sex with anyone else, and she’s seriously considering cheating on her husband with his inferior that hates him.  All this doesn’t even consider that in the brief time she interacted with Channing cubed he treated her like a child and would have beat the shit out of her if two separate people hadn’t intervened.  

FUCKING WOW GIRL!

I don’t think it was the author’s intention to make it sound SO SPOT ON as if Alexia is plotting to fuck this hotter, younger, Neanderthal but I’m no longer a pre-teen, I have the reading comprehension skills to pick up a love triangle this disgustingly obvious.

Anyway in response to WHY she should steer clear Lyall responds he only likes taming feisty women. To paraphrase:

“Some women are into being refined” says Lyall

“Yeah and some women are into needlepoint, it’s not my thing,” Alexia responds.  Thanks for not kink-shaming and showing us where Alexia stands in her personal preference.  

Despite this, money down, right now, he tries to rape her and Maccon comes in to save the day. Double money down if her and Maccon fuck right after that trauma and they do a shitty job of acting like near rape is a trauma.

So we leave off this chapter with Alexia getting ready to go to a meeting at the Shadow Council, but is interrupted by her old pal Ivy Hisselpenny showing up.  Ivy says she has exciting news. They banter so inelegantly and for far too long about how Alexia doesn’t give a shit she’s busy but oh you must know!  Eventually Ivy spits out that she’s engaged.

Guessing right now, it’s not the guy she was supposed to be flirting with at the end of the last book. That it’s some new dude who’s bad for her, and that this is some cutesy subplot where Alexia, and dude she flirted with last book comes in and saves her too.

Golly!

Say something nice faps:

They’re making the bad guy (Channing) sound like an actually bad guy despite being a hot love triangle man.

Shit did happen?

She did some decent exposition.

[lawnh8terdiversitylov3r]

Tagging game of Fictional Favourites

1. MBTI: INFP 2. Hogwarts house: Hufflepuff 3. Book person or TV person: books 4. Favourite book series: An Robbin Hobb series (I love all of them) 5. Favourite TV series/anime: probably Hellsing or maybe Gravity falls. (Sorry I like gore but I love for shadowing too) 6. Fantasy universe you would most like to live in: Rain River Wilds. Being able to explore the ruins of old civilisations, climbing trees and living under an acid river I wouldn't care if I was ugly. 7. Favourite character ever: lord Akeldama. He's a very fashionable vampire that is hella gay and collects information what's not to love? 8. Character you would like to personally slap in the face: Regal and Didric they are both slimy rich bastards. (Robin Hobb the farseer trilogy)(taran matharu summoner) 9. Character you would like to personally murder: cersei. Holy fuck I didn't even like game of thrones that much but she annoyed me sooo much. She was so stupid and backwards. 10. Character you would gladly intern under: Althea (liveship traders) or Professor Braithwope (finishing school) 11. Character you would totally have tea with: lord akeldama. It would be soo much fun. 12. Characters you feel really need a hug: the hound, I had a soft spot for him (game of thrones) 13. Character you love that you would probably hate irl: Ivan (Vikings) he's a rage child and I love it but in real life i wouldn't go anywhere near him. Felix (finishing school) 14. Character you would realistically be friends with irl: carabelle (skulduggery pleasant) and ivy hisselpenny (parasol protectorate) 15. First character you had a crush on (if any): Captain Kennit (liveship traders) my sister would tease me about it all the time. 16. Favourite ship: I don't ship much but it would have to be thrashgrace. They are inseparable. 17. Series (TV and book) that you feel ended terribly:I don't really have any. 18. Series that had so much potential but was actually an epic disaster: clan of the cave bear. I literally couldn't read past the fourth. 19. Worst book/movie/TV show you've ever read: game of thrones. It was interesting but shit at the same time. Like the last chapters of the latest books (when I was reading them) was like ..... oh no this favourite character got backstabbed... oh this one died.... that one is probably going to die. I am not reading anymore. 20. Favourite book from childhood: I don't remember my childhood and I think I only read my sisters home readers so don't have any. 21. 3 favourite tropes: happy side character with sad backstories. The group of three, main character, troll and smarts. Comparing people to weird metaphors. 22. 3 most hated tropes: when tortured character is tortured then then has a large cometary on realising why it happened to them. Oh no their dead... oh look they came back to life (if your going to die stay dead even if you are my favourite Character). *reaches full strength**becomes stronger* 23. Scariest thing you have watched/read: I sometimes binge read sixpenceee story's at night. 24. Anything you would like to recommend: ROBIN HOBB ROBIN HOBB and Gail Carriger. 25. Would you like any recommendations?: yes anything with big plot twist or emotionally crushing events would be great. Or anything you think is just the best thing ever. I am meant to tag people but I don't know enough people yet. So if you do this please tag me so I can see!!!

[fuhrmana]

honestly i want to ask you all the book questions, but i'm gonna refrain and only ask for 1, 2, 3, 6, 10, 15, 16, 17, 18, 25, 26, 30 (but like, maybe top 3), 39, 40, 42, 43. (obvi you should pick and chose if some of them don't inspire you)

Hoooo boy. Well, that’s quite a few so answers after the cut:

1: What book did you last finish? When was that?

a few days ago I reread Dragonseye by Anne McCaffrey because I’m a Huge Nerd. Honestly, I’ve been rereading a lot of comfort books lately.

2: What are you currently reading?

The CCENT/CCNA official cert guide, High Performance Browser Networking and I’m like ten pages into Phoenix and Ashes

3: What book are you planning to read next?

I think I’m going to read a micro-history (The Black Count, Salt, or Cod are all examples of that genre), maybe on the eastern world? I’m not sure. I might also get sad because of Tech Reading and end up reading something stupid like my coffee table books on the NHL.

6: Which book was the last one you really, really loved?

Like I said, I’ve been rereading books lately, so I have to say The Black Count. It’s just a really good example of what a history/biography can be, and it’s such an interesting subject. I think I liked it even better this time, and it’s my third time reading it.

10: Sci-Fi or fantasy? Why?

I love the concept of sci-fi way more, but I read a lot more fantasy. A lot of writers don’t do anything interesting with the future: racism’s the same, sexism’s the same, but with bonus xenophobia, and lots of military!

When you come across a good series (like say, Sector General), it’s fantastic! Unfortunately, a lot of the time I’m done with the book ten pages in with Sci-Fi.

15: What book changed your life?

There have been a lot. Ghost in the Third Row was the first book I ever finished on my own! I Left My Sneakers In Dimension X is the reason I have panic attacks about the concept of infinity.

But I’d say the book that changed my life the most was Parasite Rex. Without that book, I don’t fall in love with science, I don’t learn to appreciate non-fiction, I probably never find math interesting, and that version of myself would have never gone into computer tech, and probably would have never gotten into hockey or had the money to have internet friends come visit me.

16: If you could bring three books to a deserted island which would you bring and why?

One book of wilderness medicine, one book on identifying plants and then God’s Bankers because that’s the only way I’m ever finishing that book, even though it looks REALLY GOOD. (it’s overly long, and very dense and I don’t have time in the way that I used to). 

17: If you owned a bookshop what would you call it?

This is honestly a super real question, and the honest answer is: it depends on where the bookstore is, and whether or not it’d be easy to modify the building it was in. Right now, with the concept of a bookstore in the quonset hut on my parent’s property, I’d call it “Hideaway Books”, and there would be little booknooks and camo on the windows.

18: Which character from a book is the most like you?

Ivy Hisselpenny from The Parasol Protectorate. I’m also a flighty, very good friend who has a tendency towards melodrama, loud clothing and falling in love with people who have Too Much Soul.

25: If you could be a character from a book for just one day who would you be and why? (Bonus: any specific day in the story?)

See the problem with this is a lot of the things I would love to experience would be CRUSHING to have for only one day, so I have to pick something that’s good, but not Tooooo Good. 

You know what: Alice in Wonderland. Alls well that ends well, and I wouldn’t miss it when it was over (also, specifically Wonderland, not Through The Looking Glass)

26: If you could be a character from a book for their entire life who would you be and why?

Moreta, Dragonlady of Pern. She has a really great life, up until the end. She dies in what is probably a painless way after saving the world. Solid life, good effort, meaningful work. I’m into it. 

30: Who’s your favorite author? (top three)

TBH, three ALSO isn’t enough. And favorite author is TOO BROAD OKAY. Ugh, this is literally making me anxious ummm. Scott Westerfield, because he makes good books and he’s a good person. Ummm, Karl Zimmer because Parasite Rex and Microcosm. Anne McCaffrey for creating one of my favorite fandoms, and the happy place I visit when I’m sad. 

39: Name one of your favorite childhood books

Hmmm. Well I’ve already talked about McCaffrey, and I’ve already talked about Bruce Coville, so let’s talk about horse books: The Jinny Series were books I read over and over and over again when I was in elementary school. Except for the book where she is an idiot and lets a Trust Fund Baby kill off some endangered species. I only read that one once. 

40: Name one of your favorite books from your teenage years

I’m picking three, and two of then are series. I was reading Robert Jordan’s classic series (before the ghostwriter ruined it): The Wheel Of Time, I had started my collection of Mercedes Lackey books (mostly the Valdemar books, but I read everything she wrote), and I was pretty enamored with Heinlein: specifically Starship Troopers  

42: Which was the best book you had to read in school?

All my microbiology textbooks, The Barbary Plague and All Quiet On The Western Front.

43: Are you the kind of person who reads several books at once or the kind of person who can only read one book at a time?

I straight up have to read multiple books at once. I get bored really easily.