#ive only seen that one video because i was like no way would he really do such a wasteful thing

[neonbuck]

its pretty funny to reach the point where you have been feeling so godawful for so long that you just go well. i may be feelin like the train engine that Mr.Beast threw into a hole for his viewers but im still going to make and reblog funny posts

[blockedbykei]

can we get tsukishima and kuroo x figure skater gf headcanons pls?

ive always wanted to try figure skating but i am very clumsy 🙏

—

tsukishima kei

- figure skating requires great balance, especially when you spin into the air and land on one foot. luckily tsukishima knows all about landing

- obv bc he's a middle blocker so he knows how to land his foot properly to avoid falling down, so expect his presence during your practice

- sometimes he joins you inside the rink when you practice all by yourself. he's actually kind of clumsy there— he's all flimsy and gripping onto the sides 😭

- it takes him a while to get used to the ice, and he learned when you always grabbed both his hands and guided him into the middle, and then left him there

- you left him stranded in the middle of the ice rink and he was SO pissed at you he kept swearing as he fell down on his ass, almost crawling his way towards you

- though when it comes to serious practices, best believe he's even more nervous at your performance than he is at his own game.

- he's seen a lot of figure skating accidents that mostly include the blade of someone's skates stabbing their foot or slicing their face. he wasn't squeamish, but he'll probably faint if that happened to you

- tsukishima is always present at your competitions, silently watching— his only form of loud cheering was his claps and yelling at the beginning and at the end of your performance

- figure skating includes dancing too so sometimes he lets you dance with him off the rink to make your body even more languid

- when you're partnered up with a guy, he doesn't get jealous. unless that guy gets handsier than he should be, so it would always end up with your partner shying away when they catch sight of tsukki

- video tapes your practices and shows you what you need to improve like HES the coach

- but really he's just really observant and can catch on well on the dos and donts of figure skating (and he also studied it himself)

- figure skating is also what brought you two together

- he was walking by a public rink one day, though he realized it was probably rented out when he saw only your presence inside, practicing your movements. so since it was an open area, he watched you

- you caught him watching and he blushed, and he felt himself get burned alive when you skate towards him and introduced yourself

- anyway he's very supportive and prioritizes your figure skating too so you would never fight about majority of your hours being spent on the ice rink

kuroo tetsurou

- loudest cheerleader ever

- rink side (like courtside) bf

- knows jackshit about figure skating so when you tell him about this and that he's just nodding and taking mental notes

- knows how to ice skate so sometimes he joins you inside the rink and would practice with you

- and by practice i mean he's actually dancing with you

- since he's the captain of nekoma, he knows well how to prepare beforehand by studying your opponents. so he does exactly that with you

- trashtalks the living shit about your opponents

- he actually worries about how much time you spend on the rink because sometimes you come home with a fever or a runny nose from spending too much time in a cold area

- jealous bitch, HATES every partner of yours when it comes to pairings

- he panics so much too because, as aforementioned, figure skating accidents can be gruesome and he does not want you to lose a toe nor cut your face

- one time he brought his team to your practice and forced them to watch you, and you ended up inviting everyone inside the rink

- kuroo also brings them to your competitions so you could have extra cheerleaders

- says he doesn't threaten them with 100 laps but that's obviously a lie

- he met you through one of the figure skating magazines, and he's had a crush on your for a while before you'd gotten together

- he managed to watch you in the figure skating nationals in japan and brought kenma with him, and he was lucky enough to get your attention right before you performed

- anyway he thinks you look sexy in the clothes you wear for practice

- one time you almost got injured and he ran barefoot into the rink just so he could carry you and get you out of there to be examined

- you slipped and barely sprained your foot, he was always so dramatic

[xx0acidicorchid0xx]

some notes on wolverines (mustelidae) and Logan

cause new hyperfixation (its been goin on since a few weeks ago). gonna preface this by saying i have only seen the first x-men movie, and whatever else i found on tiktok n tumblr through my hyperfixation hoarding, so if anything is wrong or actually canon (or not canon) I'm sorry

notes under cut:

wolverines, while technically weasels, theyre the largest terrestrial weasel, and can weigh 26-50lbs.

Logan, is 5'3, but weighs at least 300lbs due to the admantium skeleton (195lbs without, meaning this small furry smelly man is just pure bulk)

wolverines are muscular n stocky and have thick fur (also waterproof n oily to prevent frost n such in them harsh canadian forests), are native to canada but can be found in similar environments, and are described as lil balls of violence and are extremely territorial around their food, family, and themselves (only out of necessity in order to survive the winter wastelands they live in). they also lack social skills and pack behavior like wolves

Logan, hairy beefy man, born in canada, described as an asshole, is violent n aggressive, but also severely traumatized. now with the fur, wolverines are nicknamed skunkcats because of how much they reek (they also mark whatever carcass they stole or found so nothing else can take it from em or where they buried it). if Logan (who canonically reeks) has waterproof n oily fur, it must be real difficult getting him to shower (not to mention he doesnt like getting wet) and also the water will not be able to get to his fucking skin because hes built to survive canadian woods.

wolverines are also commonly found in trees, as they use the height to locate prey and eventually pounce onto said prey

from some of the panel screenshots ive seen, Logan isnt unfamiliar with climbing onto trees

wolverines have been known to take on animals 3x their size, such as fuckin Moose, polar bears, elk n caribou, etc etc (only difference here between the mustelid and Logan is that there is no known attack on a human by a wolverine).

while wolverines have semi-retractable claws, Logan's claws are fully retractable. they (both the animal and Logan) have huge paws/hands, for the animal, its to prevent sinking into the snow

along with the thick waterproof fur and stocky build, theyre latin name gulo basically means glutton, so they have to eat a fuck load in order to maintain their body temp (usually they just eat their weight or very frequent small meals, but larger stuff is common), also theyre carnivorous but will eat anything they can find or kill, usually carcasses from avalanches n such, aka opportunity eaters

i have heard that Logan eats a shit ton, especially meat, but only large meals when alone, and small meals more frequently at the mansion. with the body heat thing, it must be super hard for him post-adamantium to keep his body temp at a normal range without literally sitting in the sun all day.

despite the aggressiveness they develop in the wild, when domesticated (which ive heard/read is super easy than you would think), they become very attached to one person, who usually is the trusted handler. they exhibit very cat-like behaviors, except wolverines actually like being picked up and wearing harnesses, they also like pets (but again, the trusted handler thing). they can become calm when hearing a high pitched obnoxious voice, and can go into a kind of trance when their gums are rubbed.

not sure about the cat behaviors n harnesses n other shit for Logan, but with the voice thing: Wade. thats all i really need to say about that

wolverines are naturally polygamous, but do come back to the female every so often to help raise the kits. theres a video of a wolverine male leaving out a moose leg near a female's den so she can have something for the kits to eat

this man gets passed around the x-men mansion like coleslaw at a southern get together dinner, aint no way hes monogamous. he does worry about the women he basically adopted and raised (rogue, laura, jubilee i think, yukio?,, i cant name any others but theres several)

wolverines also have the ability to smell a frozen carcass from over a mile away (and lemme tell ya, unless you have an excellent sense of smell, frozen anything doesnt have a smell except sharp)

this man can canonically smell emotions, and be able to tell the difference between Mystique and Storm just from smell Alone.

wolverines are very vocal, usually this kinda snarl/snort/growl/mumbling/chuff sound

not sure about comic Wolvie, but Hugh Jackman (and Logan, obviously) does snort n growl n roar n other shit like that

wolverines' mating rituals often include fighting multiple times, and mate Only after the female is confident in the male's fighting (males who return several times are more likely to mate than males who only fight once or twice) and that the female doesnt submit too easily. this is so the female and male can ensure the produced kits are strong enough to survive

self explanatory, minus the producing kits (that i know of)

also fun lil fact, wolverines' back molars are rotated at a 90 degree angle, so they can gnaw through bone easier (supposedly this is a common trait for mustelids)

not sure about sideways molars, but Logan does canonically have longer, more animalistic canines

most of my notes and how i worded some stuff is taken from wolverine expert Steve Kroschel, and tumblr user @/icarusredwings, as they have Amazing notes and headcanons on wolverines and Logan

[gldnstrngs]

ive seen people debate how arthurs character in a modern!au as a high schooler or a college student and ive decided its finally time to speak my truth (bc obviously everyone wants to hear it /j)

people will really be like “arthur wouldnt be a jock” or “arthur would be a bully—” [GUNSHOT] KEEP MY HUSBANDS NAME OUT OF YOUR FUCKING MOUTH!!!

(this is obviously me over exaggerating pls dont cancel me)

(but also arthur baby get behind me)

just hear me out though. arthur would definitely be a jock. canonically he is so passionate about being a knight, so i feel like that clearly translates to him being the same way about a sport like soccer

he’d be the star player but not because his father is wealthy or because he’s popular, but because he works hard to be the best he can possibly be. the same is applied to how well he does in classes. he would be the type of boy to act like he doesn’t care about school, but then spends every night watching videos on math concepts so he can do better

and arthur would definitely be popular. no matter how much people may argue against it, he’d depicted as a popular prince. his people love him, the knights love him, he “knows about women—” he’s popular; point blank period

so not only would be the star player of his school’s soccer team, but he would also be loved by his teammates, teachers, and peers. arthur’s easygoing and does well in school. while he can be nice there are times where he takes his teasing a little too far. he can come off as mean or “prattish” or get caught up in his teammates’ roughhousing, but under all of it its clear he has a good heart

but arthur isn’t just a star soccer player everyone likes or the popular guy that’ll throw a house party when his father isn’t around. deep down, in that good heart of his, there’s also something weighing it down

he’ll throw house parties almost every weekend because uther is never around and he always wonders why that’s the case. arthur wonders why whenever his father does come back, it’s when his half-sister, morgana, is visiting from college. but then he remembers that morgana isn’t the one to kill her mother just by existing

arthur keeps that close to his heart and it’s the reason why he’s the star player and golden boy of his school. maybe if he scored more goals and got more As then uther would finally look at him and be proud to call him his son

it’s always a rainy cloud over his head; the fact that he’s not enough for his own father. so he thinks that maybe his teammates and peers think the same way. maybe they don’t like who he is, but the goals he scores and the trophies he wins them. maybe they like the house parties he throws and how he’s so handsome and has money, but not actually like him for who he is

so arthur is definitely a popular boy and a jock, but he’s also a little more complicated than that

(in other words, he is in fact nick nelson from heartstopper)

[polyhexian]

yall gotta STOP saying hunter was trying to kill amity in eclipse lake. he was not. he was going out of his way not to kill her. his goal was to get the key and to get the key only.

lets discuss in detail.

absolute first thing that happens: King wehs Hunter

Hunter gets Flapjack staff

He teleports twice, says 'real staffs are weird' and then amity ties him up. he teleports out of this into the air.

then we has his first actual aggressive non defensive move:

This is an AOE attack. area of effect. its an attack that does less damage but hits a larger area. so this sends bolts of magic scattering and bouncing all over the place. none of them actually HIT her. and this attack does not aim at her. It purely puts her on the defensive because she is now dodging blasts.

she hops off her staff to block one and then hunter teleports in

he is now behind her and she is caught off guard. he does not attack her flank, he just reaches for the key, before king tackles him.

he teleports behind her again, and this time comes in with a swing.

one she easily blocks. again, not a magical attack here. staff bash.

okay now follow this:

hes here, with her shield

he zaps over here, lower, moves to swing but doesnt, zaps again

baps her again after her shield has already moved above her head

she moves her shield left, he comes in right but hes not even swinging.

amity punches his fucking lights out and then orbs him

he hits her with this construction punch that knocks her off her staff before she can escape

and finally he breaks the necklace with his staff.

none of these attacks were lethal. he hits her with an AOE instead of a direct attack- and she didnt have a shield up yet because she had JUST used it to tie him up, then he hops around with, frankly, some staff bashes that are really holding back from what we know hes capable of, he knocks her off her staff and then when he has the opportunity to actually HIT her he hits the key instead.

compare this to the way he fights kikimora!

he nearly gets his head taken off when she scrapes his forehead and the next attack he blocks with his eyes on Kikimora, not the attack. thats like, important. that indicative of skill level.

especially because he does it twice in a row! the second time one handed! Left handed!

look at the completely different posture he zaps in to strike with. the hits on amity he is holding back.

this little bastard does a front flip mid teleport to generate strength behind this strike.

look how effortlessly he does this. imagine how many rotations that is in a single second. hes not even looking at it OR his hands. hes spinning that one handed.

ive trained on a bo staff. this shit is not easy. i trained for two years and couldnt get anywhere near that. just watch this video of noah fort going apeshit to see what this actually looks like irl.

he fucking... hits it back at her....

this little man can spin a staff so fast he can reflect magic and control the direction it fires. he hit kikimora so hard he sent her flying twenty feet.

if hunter had wanted to kill amity she'd be fucking dead dude. amity is a good fighter, like, don't get me wrong. but hunters op as absolute shit. hes a terrifying little man. he also fought her completely differently than he did kiki, and he wasnt even trying to kill her. we've never seen Hunter fight all out like, fight to the death when he was still at full strength. we have no idea what that would look like. but we know that fight with amity was faaaaar from his potential. intentionally. he is seriously holding back and clearly on purpose. its not just that hes exhausted already, its not just that he has a new staff, its that he is holding back. he is not using lethal techniques.

[watermelonfrog2]

Fuck it, long post time.

Dsmp is so AAGGHH. I love it so much, its introduced me to some of the people I care about most and it has made me feel ways no other fandom has made me feel. I love the plotholes. I love the lack of consistency. I love how everyone has a different view on how the story played out. I love how if you asked someone what happened during a certain era their answer will be different from the next. I love the art. I love the animatics. I love the characters. I love the fanfiction. I love the story. I love the aus. I love how homemade it feels. I love how it feels like people wanted to make a cool thing so they made a cool thing. I love how the fandom took small bits of the ccs personality, added it to their character and ran with it. I love how each character had totally different motivations from any other character. I love how some things didnt make sense. I love how somethings never got answered. I love the ending. I love how somethings didnt end. I love unserious it was at times. I love how serious it was at times. I love the fans. I love the theories. I love the edits. I love the gacha reaction videos (ifykyk). I love Henry. I love c!tommy. I love exile arc. I love c!niki. I love the petwar. I love the lines, improvised or not. I love "If you wanna be a hero tommy? then die like one." I love c!SBI. I love c!Bee duo. I love c!disc duo. I love exile arc. I love pogtopia. I love l'manburg. I love c!ranboo. I love c!tubbo. I love the Big Innit/Manifold Hotel. I love shroud. I love how it was able to bring a large group of people together. I love how its let me make so many friends. I love the fandom. I love how its changed me. I love dsmp. Dsmp means so much to me because its become MY fandom. Its become what I return to when Im sad or happy. Its the only fandom I really read fics for. Its the only show/thing Ive cared about to this extent. Its the only show where Ive actually cared about a character. Its how I found my love of watching twitch streamers. It got me back into playing minecraft. It got me into writing. It makes me want to improve on my art. DSMP is my comfort fandom, my main fandom, everything and anything all at once. I love watching compilations of the characters. I love all the cosplays. I love how ive gotten into so many hobbies because of it. I owe my personality to C!tommy and cc!tommy and dsmp as a whole. I owe my internet presence to dsmp. It has such a special place in my heart. I love c!tommy. I love how he cares for animals. I love how hes mean and aggrressive and rude. I love how hes hurt adn traumatised and healing. I love the relationships between the characters. I love how c!tommy cares and he doesnt. I love how the discs mean so much to him. I love how his decisions are drived by emotions. I love him having so many attachments. I love how other people will think my view of him is wrong/different to theirs. I love how dsmp allowed me to experiment with who I am (personality wise). I love how dsmp entered me to a part of the internet I would never have seen before. I love how I feel nostalgic looking at the fanart or fansongs. I love. It all. I know this was really rambl-y but ive just been thinking about it and I have so many feelings. My concluding statement is: DSMP has shpaed me into who I am and no one can take it away from me. It will always have a special place in my heart.

[world0fmadness]

DIRTY NEW YORKER

niko bellic x reader

♡ general dating headcanons for niko!

୨୧ started replaying grand theft auto IV a couple days ago and love him so much, it is honestly embarrassing… reader is slightly referenced to have big boobs but it’s not a major thing at all <3

♡ view my video game masterlist here

reading music recommendations: dirty new yorker by mobb deep - windowlicker by aphex twin

♡ niko can be kind of cheap when it comes to dates and such…

୨୧ he doesn’t really mean to be, it’s just that he’s not a super fancy person! he didn’t grow up with money, he’s not very knowledgeable on princess treatment and what not

♡ but he really tries his best to treat you as well as he knows how to!

୨୧ wether it be taking you to a bar to grab some drinks together which he pays for, bringing you flowers when picking you up in his car

♡ speaking of which, when you’re in his car is when you get ultimate princess treatment, you’re his passenger princess

୨୧ you wanna play one your CDs or switch the radio station to one of your favourites? go for it, he won’t bat an eye, he might even bob his head to the music

♡ you want the windows rolled up so that the rushing wind doesn’t ruin your hair, even on a hot day? okay… it’s fine by him! have them rolled all the way up

୨୧ he’s already kind of a reckless driver but when you’re in the car sometimes he’ll speed up when approaching bumps in the road and side eye you to watch your boobs bounce as he smirks

♡ he loves bouncy boobs, no further comments from me at this time…

୨୧ niko did not introduce you to roman when you guys first started dating!

♡ he thought you would be overwhelmed by his… unique personality and want out of the relationship with him

୨୧ when he told you this, you were so beyond confused because like… you’re in a relationship with niko, not roman… why would you care about how his cousin acts?

♡ so eventually you meet roman and he’s nice enough to you! he makes a point to over enthusiastically tell niko how he “ totally hit the liberty city jackpot ” with you when you’re off grabbing a drink

୨୧ niko can be pretty damn protective of you!

♡ with the line of work he’s in and the type of people who reside in liberty city, he just knows he has to look out for you

୨୧ if you’re ever catcalled whilst walking beside him, he’s quick to cuss the person out in serbian as you try to pull him along or sometimes egg him on… depending on what mood you’re in

♡ after this happens, he usually fucks you SO hard! either in the back of the car or in bed when you get back to your apartment! you’re his, those pieces of filth should know that, everyone should know that

“ fucking filth… you’re mine aren’t you, Лепа? they could never fuck you like i do… ” ( you can’t even get a word of agreement out with how fast and hard he’s pounding you, he’s almost animalistic )

୨୧ he’s not insecure, he’s just protective and likes people to know you’re spoken for

♡ niko isn’t majorly into pda but this man will never not be holding your hand as you walk the streets!

୨୧ you like holding his hand anyways, his fingerless gloves keep you warm and if you ever need to be more warmed up he’ll lend you his bomber jacket whilst huffing and grumbling about how he told you to take a damn jacket out with you

♡ when walking the street together, niko is one of those people who walks on the side of the path closest to the road… it’s just instinct for him!

୨୧ i feel like he probably uses way too much cologne

♡ like sometimes you have to cover your nose when you first approach him because it feels like it’s being burned as you inhale the air around him

୨୧ when you tell him to loosen up on the cologne, he’s so personally offended! what? do you not want him to smell good? he literally only puts it on for you!

“ what do you mean too much? i smell nice! you… okay, whatever… too much… ” ( this is the most upset you’ve ever seen him and it’s literally over cologne )

♡ but after a lengthy explanation to him and defending your case, he agrees to go easy on the sprays next time

୨୧ niko keeps a risqué picture of you in his wallet! roman saw it from afar once and started mocking him for being sappy but also asked to see it up close to which niko simply widened his eyes in his direction and yelled at him

“ what? no! you can’t, why would i show you that? leave, go away… ” ( he’s so mad roman saw it at all, let alone him asking to see it better )

♡ when you guys sleep together, it’s rare he ever cuddles you… he just doesn’t really like body heat! it makes him sweat and he hates being sticky and sweaty, so he usually just has an arm thrown over your midriff or your chest and one of his legs tangled with yours under the thin blanket <3

[cringelordofchaos]

Disability + Queer headcanons for some South Park characters i like

(warning: u might not agree w everything i have to say !!! :shocked emoji:)

(also sorry if im inconsistent w some characters pronouns ill probably refer to a character with their canon pronouns in the show and then when i remember trans hcs of said characterr suddenly ill refer to the w different pronouns)

Craig Tucker

- gay (no fucking shit sherlock)

- level 1 autistic, low empathy, difficulties communicating and understanding emotions, yada yada u get the gist

- some form of anxiety? idk probs not to a disordered amount but its there.

Kenny McCormick

- Chronic pain (everywhere)

- Epilepsy

- dude LITERALLY got a seizure from simply playing a video game (in thepokemon episode) this dudes physical health is so bad prolly cuz his constant deaths still leave an impact on him even after he gets revived?

- autism !? (idk im not 100% sure just yet)

- selectively mute

- probably some form of (complex?) PTSD from the constant traumatizing deaths he endures though again like im not sure

- but yyeah ok i just remembered thispost is about disability AND queer hcs so uhm kenny. I like the genderqueer hcs but he could also just be really gnc and i love that for him too. either way likes women a lot and i cant exactly imagine him liking a dude? like idk maybe but nah i dont see it

Tweek Tweak

- im sorry but i personally dont view him as having adhd cuz his parents tell others hes hyperactive bc of it but really its because they keep drugging the fucking eight year old so idk. like idk he could possibly have it but i cant decipher cuz we dont know what tweek would be like if he wasnt drugged and a coffee addict at such a young age. and causes of symptoms matter

- but yeah he def has GAD and panic disorder bc of the drugged coffee

- oh also gay

eric cartman

- NPD (i know hes a really stereotypical and harmful portrayal of it and there should be better representation of it but theres no way he doesnt have it im sorry)

- sexuality and gender are whatever benefits him at the moment

(ok but if ur actually wondering abt my hc hes probably gay)(in extreme denial obviously though)

Butters Stotch

- has some form of disorder related to trauma and if he doesnt hell get one when he grows up because like dudes been through SOME FUCKING SHIT. (and he canonically falls asleep to and wakes up to the sounds of his own screams so like. uhm)

- seems like hes straight? like could be bi though idk. he DID have a crush on princess kenny though? take it as you will lmao

- SHIT i forgot about marjorine. yeah just like w kenny either genderqueer or gnc, love both hcs

- may i suggest aroace butters though

- or no sexuality butters (he doesnt have a sexuality :broke heart:)(dont aks me how that works it jst does)

Stan Marsh

- Major depressive disorder

- literal alcoholic at age 10 thats bound to mess him up for life one way or another

- canonically diagnosed with asperger's syndrome but it was his obvious depression being misdiagnosed

- bi but like only gay for specific chars. but yeah confused abt sexuality

- gender questioning too and its pretty canon as shown in 'the cissy'. though then again stans really empathetic so u could say stans confused feelings of gender identity were just being influenced by cartman and wendy recently telling the school theyre trans. idk WHICH way stans trans though and neither do they

- emo

kyle broflovski

- im gonna hes say asexual cuz of human kite's character chart thingy and also bc why not

- have got zero clue as to what his sexuality is like. im a style shipper (big surprise ik) so u might think i think he likes dudes but idk. ive never seen anyone hc him as aroace before but i think it could fit him. he does seem like he could just be cishet too. or maybe bi? ive also seen gay hcs of him. idk man i think multiple fit depending on how u interpret his character?

-

Tolkien Black

- his roleplay character chart thingy said ther character was gender neutral so im going w that hc

- likes girls (canon as shown in cartman finds love)

Bradly/Bradley (the one from the conversion therapy episode)

- gay (SHOCKER)(BIGASS SURPRISE)(

Timmy

- canon wheelchair user (whats the term again i forgor) and also intellectually disabled (but also there was one point where it was revealed he was actually a genius i think?? so maybe hes not intellectually disabled but rather he lacks the capacity to express or communicate his inner world? idk)

- timmy

thas all i got for now im too lazy to continue but yeah pls dont kill me for these

EDIT 11/JUNE/2024: forgot to say this but also kenny has more physical disabilities than listed and also Cartman is dyslexic in my hc

[never-forget-viva-la-pluto]

To the SPN fans that are hating on good omens rn bc of the leak, I hope you choke. I've seen some really nasty shit today from some of my (now unfollowed) followers whom I followed for spn content. So let's make one thing clear from actual posts ive seen today:

-Saying that the "wrong angels kissed", is...homophobic. I was with destiel from beginning to end and yeah we were completely shafted, but it's not okay to then say that other gay couples in media aren't allowed to kiss just because they aren't the ones you thought were hot. Jesus christ didn't think I needed to write that one down for ya-bo burnham

-I saw so much fatphobia about how Castiel deserved a kiss more than Aziraphel bc "he has far more sex appeal." Wtf wtf wtf. How do you live with yourselves saying that shit?You can pry Micheal Sheens body type Aziraphel out of my cold dead hands, you CW brainwashed morons!

-hate against the author for some reason, no one is willing to give specifics about it, but I think the majority of them maintain that GO is not good rep because they didn't kiss and now they are claiming pandering or something? Honestly that guy has only ever stood with the writers guild and queer people his whole career from what I find so I don't think it's fair whatever hate they are spouting. He isnt even saying he is upset with fans that saw or shared the video. Hes being super nice about it!

-I will say, non of us SPN fans have a fucking leg to stand on when it comes to hating something bc of the authors, OK. I saw someone saying the writing for spn was better and I can say you did not watch the show. I loved spn but don't do the late Terry Pratchett like this. He did nothing wrong

-on that same ish strain, as an ace person who thrives off queerplatonic relationships in media, maybe they kiss, I dunno. I just have to wait until the season comes out. Not 1 SPN fan gets to bitch about GO asexualty rep when SPN never even tried that route with any of its characters. But also ace characters are allowed to kiss, so you can write them that way of you want and interpret them that way if you want still. This is your viewing experience.

-this leak is truly not the same as the SPN yo a ti leak, solely bc the episode hasn't aired yet. "None of you GO fans would have survived the yo a ti leak." No I think you wouldn't bc the spn leak was clinging to an already mangled straw, while the angel's in GO are queer already. Queer queer queer and no amount of kissing or lack thereof is going to change that. We have no idea what happens in that episode of GO, but we saw the creators butcher the only moment in the show that could have meant anything real for queer viewers in SPN.

-"SPN crowly was kissing dudes first so this one is not that impressive". I see two cakes. One was made with the intent to make gay people look evil, but over time got kinda funny and a little better bc gay people liked it, and the other was about telling an interesting story about how love is so important, especially at the end of the world, and gay people liked that one too! So for me it's YaY two cakes!

-again the anti aziraphel is so plainly just fatphobia. You have no excuses. Sorry you don't think someone who looks like a slightly chubby micheal sheen could ever get kissed by someone who looks like David tennant, but you are not only wrong, you are also childish.

OK I'm done. Go watch good omens s2 when it comes out for my fucking sanity please. Or don't if all you are going to do is try to rip it apart like you do to all media that tries to be better.

[mrs-monaghan]

Ive been noticing jks been showing a lot of his apartment lately, i know he usually doesnt shy away from this but it almost seems deliberate. He did it on his 3D tiktok where the camera angle intentionally went wider showing areas seen in that video. Also today in his live when showing where he films tiktoks he showed a fair bit of his apartment, again all the parts shown in that video. I apologise for bringing that up again it was just interesting to me because it almost seems like he wants people to notice how things were evidently different. Sometimes i feel like im reading too much into it and please feel free to let me know if i am but as we all know jk is very smart and on the ball, considering the comments about the address and it being online for everyone to see. Again insinuating that its all there for sceptics to see, they only have to open their eyes.

Much love💞💞💞

I can see this. I wouldn't worry too much about reading too much into Jikook. They've been leaving crumbs for us for years. So I don't blame jkkrs for always trying to connect them. Difference between us and "others" is that when we are proven wrong we move on. U know?

I don't blame u for thinking he showed his room on purpose to debunk the video.

Just like I don't blame us who believe Jikook have been dropping eo off and sometimes picking eo up from the airport all year.

I also don't blame those who read into the amount of hearts JK dropped during LC

Love for Army. Who is Army?

I don't blame the people who think silver and golden just like the sun and moon.

And they both know they are called the sun and moon.

Some of us are cheesing over the fact that JK's album is gonna have 11 songs. 3 are out so only 8 left. That's 8/11 y'all.

This tiktok is an old trend and the song is a man listing women names and then JK's caption read "I'm going the other way" some jkkrs think this meant JK was saying he's gay; goes the other way. Simply because of the timing where he'd just told us he doesn't have a girlfriend like 42 times. Just coz I didn't see it like that, doesn't mean I would blame anyone for reading into that TT. Cue the line love is a road that goes both ways in GCFT. First the fairys wheel is a rainbow

then its just normal.

Is it because love goes both ways?? Again, can't blame no-one for concluding it's what he meant.

Jikook are smart. Like really smart, and they do this shit all the time. We all know what happened with Jimin and the glasses.

Thread analysis on the whole thing here.

Jikook have been wilding out in these streets for years anon, we can't be blamed for believing they're a couple. Aint no such thing as coincidence when it comes to them 2.

Read away!

[cloudcountry]

I don't play sdv so im sending this on anon in case i say something wrong but it's always been bizarre to me how people dehumanize shane

I've seen multiple videos talking about the worst bachelors and they always put him in first because "he betrays the player" by relapsing on drinking but like, isn't that just realistic? Shane is human that's normal, it's always weird how they want to just save and fix Shane instead of accepting and loving him, they treat him like shit and for what? it's not like he's abusive he's sweet and caring he just has an addiction 😭

anon you hit the nail right on the head.

under the cut because im talking about mental health and relapsing.

the people who yell about shane being a fixer upper the LOUDEST are the one who actually WANT him fixed. nobody who genuinely cared for shane and loves him for who he is wants to "fix him," in fact you as the farmer dont even really push him to do anything. shane decides to get therapy on his own, he decides to repair his relationships on his own, HELL he even asks the farmer to take him to the hospital after he drank too much ON HIS OWN.

people love to cry out "YOU CANT FIX HIM" when nobody, not even the IN GAME FARMER is trying to do that. shane is a very realistic character, one of the most realistic in the game, and to say he "betrays" his spouse because he RELAPSED or "isn't a good husband" because his room is messy is CRAZY to me. its like people aren't even hearing themselves talk.

ive seen some people who seem to genuine like shane talk about how his room is so bothersome because "its messy" and "doesnt look as nice as the other candidates" and EVERY TIME i'm like. Yeah and you know why? because shane is depressed. because shane, who struggles to get out of bed sometimes, may not have the energy to clean up his room every day. shane, who still has horrible thoughts about himself, may feel like he's too worthless to even bother trying because what would a little cleaning do? shane, even after he marries you, is still VERY MENTALLY ILL.

its like some of the posts on here talking about how people only support mentally ill people if theyre clean and up to THEIR standards. shane is literally a walking representation of that. even the people who love him cant completely accept his mental illness because it makes him nasty to them and yet not a single one of them sees a problem with it. it makes me so angry because i HAVE struggled with depression, i HAVE gone through days were i couldn't clean, i HAVE been disgusting. and to me, every single time i see someone talk about shane this way, a character who i relate to because we have very similar struggles, it tells me that people would think this way about me too.

stardew is such a great game for finding fictional characters that embody your struggles. shane is one of those characters. people like him because of his many flaws and even greater amount of strengths. people like shane because he embodies them. the stardew fandom screaming over and over again that shane is nothing but an outlet for people with fixer complexes will never not piss me the hell off.

[lifesteal-headcanons]

I'm gonna put the glitch in glitch duo right now and rant about them and how their glitches work because I am so normal about them (lie)

Okay, so I barely got into Lifesteal like. Late last year because of Squiddo joining and I lowkey got really hyped for it and seeing Ash and Squiddo together I was like.. Woah.. New fav duo alert.. And then found that there was no fancontent and had to make it myself so.

Anywho! Ashswag, as we already know, has that lil.. Thing over his left eye (?) That a lot of us (me) has interpreted as like. Glitching. So to start us off, I believe that glitching can stem from messing with your own player code/others player code/server codes/using mods with like. Virus' or something idk im not that smart. And from the Ashswag videos I've watched we can kind of tell where Ash fits in there by like. Fucking with how servers work and therefore fucking up his own code.

Squiddo's code is glitched because.. Have you watched Squiddo's videos? Naw but fr, she's constantly putting the most cancer inducing mods on her game, playing mods that can definitely fry their pc, playing minecraft on a USB DRIVE?? Which would DELETE chunks to MAKE MORE OF ITSELF so like. You can see where I'm going with this. So obviously, their code gets fucked up and the more they do these mods and plug ins and - whatever the hell, the more their code because intangible and unable to be fixed.

So, with that, I'm gonna go ahead and explain how I think their glitching works and how it affects their body/like.. Everything else.

Ashswag's glitches, as we can see, are more visible to the eye. Literally over his damn eye. I'm gonna go ahead and assume that gives him some partial blindness in his left eye. Also, from some fics that ive read ive seen people give him like, back problems and chronic pain that he probably had before but the glitches DEFINITELY don't help at all and instead make the pain way worse than it already is so. Yay!

While Ash's are more physical, I feel like Squiddo's are more like. Mental? If you catch my drift? While Ash is stumbling down into a heap of pain on the floor because his back is killing him, Squiddo is standing in the hallway staring at him wondering why the guy from the one house smp is crumbling on the floor in front of them on a server they swore they were not on a few weeks ago.

So yeah. Memory loss Squiddo. Also inspired from a fic that I do know! I'll link the fics I got inspired from at the end because they are genuinely such good reads and great ideas.

But I decided that memory loss best fit Squiddo, because tbh they are pretty forgetful. And I take their goofy hijinks and shenanigans as just. Squiddo having to recollection of anything and just trying to do something (which she's probably done before) to job their memory but oh well. I feel as if the memory loss is more of a living in the farlands thing rather than glitched out fucked-up code inducing thing, but whatever. The only time we see glitched out Squiddo is on thumbnails! So I feel like whenever Squiddo joins a server or world that's previously glitched or like. They're already pretty glitched, it really takes its toll and fucks up the whole thing and makes it a memory loss disaster for Squiddo.

And because of Squiddo's horrible memory, they can never recollect and find out what the hell happened to the world to make it this glitched out when in reality she's the reason the world is so glitched.

Except when joining servers! Surprisingly, they don't experience those things when joining servers while when joining worlds the world would become discombobulated and delete itself just after a few hours. Funsies! Which they realize when they join the one house smp just to explore it and then they find ASHSWAG!! And then realizes that HE'S GLITCHED TOO!! YAYY!!! And then they absolutely BOMBARDDDD him with questioned like "why do my worlds always delete themselves?", "what causes someone to have a glitched code?" And "how are servers able to not glitch out?" Etc etc which Ashswag answers and then BOOM! FRIENDSHIP!!!

Basically the only reason servers are able to work for them is because theres like.. This other thing cody whatever that prevents it to idk im not smart. This is not compliant with my past fics written about this stuff but oh wellsies.

Another thing I have made up is 'glitch fever' where basically they just get sick because of their fucked up code and glitches. Yeah. Also based off a fic I read where being around Ashswag too much can make you sick and stuff. I feel like their are certain people who are immune to it like Reddoons (purely because of Swagdoons and nothing else) and Squiddo (because they also glitch tf out and Swagsquid/silly).

Another thing I've like. Headcanoned (because this is all just me reading too much into things and making too many headcanons about) is that their glitches also like.. Made their body tempature irregular. This is so random but it was just something I thought of and then I wrote a fic about it. Like, Ash is constantly fucking cold and on a hot ass texas summer day he'll feel a little warm. Same for Squiddo just vice versa. I love them. The sillies. I want to put them in a terrarium and study them.

That's.. All I have I'm pretty sure. Hello I am Swagsquid the #1 Glitch Duo Writer/Enthusiast and the #1 Swagsquid Shipper (the ONLY Swagsquid shipper..) and thank you for listening to my ted talk.

Fics I took inspiration from:

"Dear Diary: Today, I killed someone" by Fey_wilde on Ao3 (https://archiveofourown.org/works/52170592)

"I Feel Too Weak to Stand" by Eternal_Era on Ao3 (https://archiveofourown.org/works/48067240)

"fault lines" by garlic_sauc3 on Ao3 (https://archiveofourown.org/works/41924196)

Fics I've written based on this idea:

"Glitch fever" by (ME!!) Swagsquid on Ao3 (https://archiveofourown.org/works/53400835)

"The warmth of another's embrace" by Swagsquid on Ao3 (https://archiveofourown.org/works/53449573/chapters/135284551)

"Forgotten hot chocolate" by Swagsquid on Ao3 (https://archiveofourown.org/works/54350146)

(Please read the tags and ratings before reading some of the fics!)

.

[desertsfic]

Hi!!! You don't have to respond, but I can NOT stop thinking about the part in rng where Bro puts Dave's sword back in his strife deck and like??? I'd never considered??? That??? Ive been chewing on this for a while, but could you possibly elaborate on it? Like how did you come up with including it and what is the context within the universe?

Hi!

No, I would love to answer, actually. :) I actually think about this kind of thing a lot, and a lot of thoughts led me to writing that moment lol

If you know me you know that I really love working with the mechanics of sylladices! Generally I have been following the (extremely interpretive) rules as best I can, but not all mechanics are explained in detail, so sometimes you just make stuff up!

To start, we don't actually know what kind of fetch modus alpha Dave has, and because of that we can just make up anything we want. I think it actually makes that more fun! :)

but I like to think given the fact that the beta guardians seem to have fetch modi that differ from their kids, that Dave at least might be in possession of the original sylladex that Dirk possesses (techhop modus).

It's also the modus that I gave Bro, since he and Dave have been known to use them in quote unquote "rap battles", and it is the only other rap based human modi I know of (and because he is a Dirk).

Guardians are just made up guys, y'know, so we can say whatever we want about them.

And anyway, since it's the one that Dirk has, it just made sense for alpha Dave to be the previous owner! or at least have been vain enough to have assumed that his kid would want the same decks that he has lol

So we can assume, if they have the same fetch modus, and obviously the same strife abstratus, then Bro would be familiar with it.

So they have the same dex, and they're living in a world where this is a normal thing that people have, and have access to.

And if that wasn't the original intent thats not my problem because it's a fascinating world and I love exploring it.

Also just as a relevant side note I assume pickpockets exist in Homestuck I mean I don't have proof but I assume they do, right, so I assume, using a sylladex as an analog for a purse that can hold you wallet, there are people who are gonna want the stuff in your dex, and surely there are people amongst them who have found workarounds to accessing people's dexes or abstratus.

Bro seems like the kind of person who would be interested in exploiting those workarounds, and I think so in particular after the way he slices through the ABSCOND bar in the early acts, interacting with an abstract object that perhaps previously, in video game logic, we'd assume only the player character can see.

For him personally reaching into somebody else's sylladex, I was specifically thinking about Gamzees miracle modus when I was writing, and the way he just kind of reaches up in there and grabs the thing,

versus the other ways we've seen people interacting with them, from Dad Egbert's wallet (able to hold his car in a captcha card) to Jade and her pictionary fetch modus (which requires a drawing).

I don't remember the exact moment I decided on it, but I just remember thinking about abstrati and 'dices and being like, "wouldn't it be absolutely fucked if someone interacted with your own personal inventory space?" something I'm sure has occured in video games, but I can't think of an exact example off the top of my head (undertale maybe?)

I just imagine it would be extremely uncomfortable, perhaps a bit like a mix of having someone rooting around in your pockets with an extreme personal space violation and maybe even a little bit of head fuckery, since it seems that a deck is (maybe I misremember this) generally only seen by the person to whom it belongs.

It just seemed like the ultimate dick move, enough to leave someone like alpha Dave speechless, and kind of exploring the question "can someone interact with someone else's sylladex and strife deck?" I don't know! But it is fun to think about :)

[blueberrypancakesworld]

okay so ive really really enjoyed your nsfw-alphabets for lords of chaos, and i was wondering if you could write one for hellhammer (the one who was played by Anthony De La Torre)? its completely okay if you wouldnt like to, considering he didnt have much screen time but it would be super cool if you did!

have a good day/night! ☆

Hello my dear @bvg-w1res first of all I'm glad you liked my nsfw-alphabets for the other characters it was fun and a little challenge to write for all of them. Also Hellhammer because like you said he has not really much screen time but I did my best. Also thank you very much for this request and I hope you like it ans everybody else too. Have fun reading :)

ps : have a good day/night too

NSFW - Alphabet - Hellhammer

warning : +18, minors don't interact, it's getting steamy under the cut

masterlist

Disclaimer : I don't want to glorify anything, it's about the actors who play a role, not the real events.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A = Aftercare (how they are after sex).

°Hellhammer or Jan as he is usually only called by you when you are together is an angel when it comes to aftercare. No matter how long you slept together he will at least always tell you how good you were.

°He loves to pamper you afterwards, it's important to him not only to make it clear that you are his pretty girl but also to show you his softer side. He loves to praise you, to clean you and him and to fetch little snacks if you are hungry. He will love to take care of you.

°,,My beautiful girl".

══════════════════════

B = Bodypart (his favourite part of you and them)

°He loves his hands because as Mayhem's drummer he is one of the best and most dexterous. And not only he knows that. No matter if it's just foreplay or directly during sex his hands are always on your body. Whether it's massaging your breasts and watching with relish what happens when he lightly pinches your nipples. Or on your buttocks to press them lightly. But also to run through your hair, not least when you give him a blow job and he can direct you that way. Instead of the silver tongue he has the silver hands.

°He loves everything about you, you are his pretty girl. But most of all he loves two things about you. Your breasts are just the perfect shape and size for him, they fit perfectly in his hands and he loves to watch them almost fascinated during sex. It doesn't matter if you wear a bra or not, they were just perfect. He also loves your thighs, especially when you are wearing knee socks, pantyhose, tight pants or a short skirt. Whatever it is, he just loves to touch the soft skin, kiss it, bite it lightly and just touch it, especially when he palms himself between yours.

══════════════════════

C= Cum (anything to do with cum)

°He loves to cum on your breasts especially when you suck him and he can watch his cum moving over your breasts and dripping on your belly and thighs. It's one of the most erotic things he's ever seen.

°He also likes to come inside you and watch his cum run out of you. Only to either stuff it back inside you to watch it come out again. Or when you come to take it in with his fingers and lick it off and taste it.

°,,Sweetie you are addictive".

══════════════════════

D = Dirty Secret (self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

°Something he wants to try during a concert or a fuller band rehearsal. That you should ride his thigh, follow the rhythm of his drums and give in to the excitement. He wants to see you fall apart on his lap. How you come when you hold on to him.

°Like some of the others, he would love to make a porno with you. Similar to the footage from the party video, but he's serious. As soon as he finds the right moment he'll suggest it to you and you'll go through with it, you'll have a whole collection of different genres (Hellhammer comes up with the great idea to rent out these videos in the record shop - a surprisingly good deal).

══════════════════════

E = Experience (how experienced are they? Do they know what they're doing?)

°He definitely has some experience, but it's more from his school days with some girl in the bathroom or behind the school. He was the good-looking outsider and has enough experience as far as that goes.

°But just because you've had a little experience here and there doesn't mean you're a sex god like Hellhammer. So the sex with him is good, more than that, but as far as teasing and all that is concerned, he still has a bit to learn. He was more just in and out and coming. Until the two of you got together and discovered the world of lust and eroticism. A more than just good journey.

°,,I am already learning new things, my love.

══════════════════════

F = Favourite position (without saying you know what it's about)

°69 position = A position he not only always wanted to try out and had watched in numerous porn movies. After you have reached the level of the relationship, it quickly becomes clear why he likes this position. Not only do you both orally pleasure each other, which is not only exciting for him, but being able to taste you like this is simply everything for him. Every time he is incredibly excited and can hardly wait until you finally end up in bed. He loves it too much, his hands on your hips and thighs, the warm soft skin and his tongue that he loves to use.

°,,Come on baby I want you".

°Ruler = An idea you had suggested and he was only too happy to comply, secretly wanting to try it out. Not only do you touch each other similarly to the 69 position, the fact that you are in control, set the pace and move your hips. When he can relinquish control and praise how good you are and just give himself to you instead of you to him. Something he can't get enough of when you take control.

°,,My ruler...I want you to take over".

══════════════════════

G = Goofy (are they more serious at the moment? are they funny? etc.)

°Even though sex isn't really serious for him, it's actually a stress reliever and just something to get off his chest, so to speak. Is it more serious with you after you've been together which is also because he has learned through you that it can be more than just the reasons mentioned.

°But just because he has learned to take sex more seriously, there will always be jokes or comments or touching. He is actually always giggling and laughing and he just can't help it. For him it is almost impossible

°,,Just one more joke promised".

══════════════════════

H = Hair (how shaved is it? Does the trunk match the apple? ect.)

°He doesn't shave his happy trail he likes it especially in the summer when he wears a crop top and you almost crack him up with your look as he calls it. But even otherwise he doesn't always shave, sometimes when he feels like it or sometimes not. If it bothers you, he would shave it, but he doesn't have to.

°His hair on his head is already quite dark, which is why his hair down there is almost black, so the trunk doesn't quite match the apple or the other way round, depending...

══════════════════════

I = Intimacy (how are they at the moment the romantic aspect)

°He is surprisingly romantic during foreplay as well as during sex and afterwards. In that respect he is definitely the sanest in the whole black circle.

°Whether he's telling you how good you are, cuddling you, massaging you, adoring you, kissing you or anything else. Hellhammer adores you, you are simply his special girl, his beautiful girl. And he will tell you that over and over again.

══════════════════════

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

°Often, especially when he comes back from band rehearsals and just needs to come down and you're not there, he passes the time himself. Mostly on his sofa or his bed. With several pictures of you, a piece of clothing or recorded videos it's just perfect.

°A thing you did once for his birthday. A strip tease for Jan where you made him touch yourself in a lovely way while you made him hard with your body and movements alone. A thing that will not only take place on his birthday.

══════════════════════

Kink = (one or more of the kinks)

°Mommy Kink = Maybe unexpected for both of you and for himself. In the middle of sex, his mind had been clouded with lust for too long, and it just came out of his mouth and he didn't really notice it. But when you teased him for it, it only excited him even more. Sometimes he called you ,,Mam" or ,,Mommy" as a nickname but it was always just a cute extra...at least that's what you both thought. Now it has become more of a little game of praise and dominance. Because he desperately wants your approval and you have to tell your handsome boy how good he is. While he admires and adores you at the same time.

°,,I'm going to do it good...Mommy-I-I promise really good".

°Power play = In connection with his mommy kink the thought and implementation of who will give in first. How far he can go with his teasing in the hope that you will be the first one on the bed. Or maybe it's you with words of praise, playing with one of his pretty locks of hair and saying "My good boy" that will get him on the bed faster than necessary, right? Every time it's finding out who's giving in, who's taking the lead, it excites him more than it should.

°,,You want to play, sweetie? Oh, believe me, we're just getting started."

°Hair pulling = No real kink but if you dominate him and touch him roughly whether on the arm, hand, leg, neck or even the hair he will become the submissive faster than his head realises. If you drag him by the hair onto the bed or wink at his knees, you will hear more than just whimpering and pleading from his lips.

°,,Please...harder...I'll be good".

══════════════════════

L = Location (favourite place to do it)

°His beloved couch in his flat. Not only was it incredibly expensive but also beautiful (in his opinion). So why not use it properly and not just to sit on it. From sitting, to cuddling and then to sex. That was the advantage as he had no flatmates he could make anything he wanted his sex place including his couch which became almost like a second bed.

°Everywhere. Really everywhere, it doesn't even have to be his flat. It didn't matter if it was the record shop, much to Euronymous' delight, or a back alley, someone's bathroom party. He didn't care, everywhere was perfect.

══════════════════════

M = Motivation (what turns them on)

°Clothing = Depending on what you were wearing, his range of emotions and feelings ranged from barely seen to a compliment to a drooling horny something that immediately gets on you. Especially when you're wearing something with cleavage and it's short. Then he presses himself almost demanding and yet submissive against you and wants to tear everything off your body immediately.

°,,You look...just so arousing beautiful"

°You at the drums = When he saw you sitting at his drums unnoticed, slightly lost in thought, running your fingers over the drumsticks and hitting the various drums with them. Not following any real melody but just playing in front of you. Did this trigger something in him that he thought was not possible. He wanted to stand behind you, lead you, take your hands in his and make a game out of it. A play. The teacher and his willing pupil. How he turned the swivel chair around and opened his belt. Knowing in your eyes what he wanted from you. Yep, that'll get him more than aroused.

°,,Fuck that's good"

══════════════════════

N = No (something they wouldn't do, dismissing)

°Boredom = What seems a little complicated at first is not. Hellhammer simply wants a certain challenge every time. A new position, a little more begging, a little more rebellion or simply a new approach. He is always on the lookout for something new and exciting. The main thing is that he doesn't get bored, because that would be death.

°Daddy kink = The opposite of his mommy kink. Whether it's you calling him that or him talking about himself that way. He doesn't quite know what it is but he either just thinks it's stupid and laughs about it or it's immediately something that turns him off and leaves him cold. It's just the way he is, he can't help it.

══════════════════════

O = Oral (preference whether giving or receiving, skill, ect.)

°He loves it when you give him oral he likes it even more than sex sometimes. Not only do you take him so well and are a god in his eyes when it comes to that. You also know exactly what to do. He loves to bury his hand in your hair, to set the pace, to move his hips slightly. Hearing your suppressed moans and pleas. Only to end up pulling you to your feet and kissing you not least to taste himself.

°,,Someone-ah should record how good you are at this. Like you were made for it.

°As far as your satisfaction is concerned, he is almost more hungry than Pelle and really wants to ask you for the best possible. He will go down on his knees as soon as you ask him to, his dark hair falling slightly into his face, a pleading submissive look reflected in his eyes. Drunk with anticipation and love, he kisses his way up your legs and ends up using more than just his tongue, that's for sure. He makes sure you have at least two orgasms. No matter how many you want, he'll give them to you. He wants to give them to you.

°,,You are so incredibly handsome-so beautiful, ma'am."

══════════════════════

P = Pace (are they fast and hard? slow and sensitive? etc.)

°He is in the middle between fast and slow. But it also depends a lot on his own arousal. How needy is he or you?

°But it doesn't matter if he is hard and fast or slow and sensitive. He's as good as ever at caring for you and finding the right balance in all four areas. After all, he wants to be rewarded with words.

══════════════════════

Q = Quickie (their opinion on quickies, how often etc)

°Quickies are my third first name according to Hellhammer. He loves quickies in the form of oral satisfaction especially when you get on your knees in front of him. It's easy and fast for him, brings him satisfaction. But even when you do it, of course he does it in return. He wants to ask himself every time how fast he can bring you to orgasm. How fast or how long it takes you to be caught by one of the coven. He wants to break his records

°If there's not enough time the solution is a quickie and as luck would have it you almost always don't have much time.

°Oh no, we still have fifteen minutes...sounds like a quickie to the other room. Don't you think?"

══════════════════════

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

°Before you got together he didn't really experiment. It was often just thoughts he had but never acted on. But with you, oh man, you have a lot to go through because, to be more precise, he has made a whole list of things he wants to try out with you.

°Trying something with new things also means taking a risk. Which is why he always loves to take risks, whether it's for him or for you. The main thing is that you have tried it out, because the proof of the pudding is in the eating.

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S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go? how long can they last?)

°He is not the man for the big one, which is not least due to his smoking, which he strictly denies. However, with him there are at least two rounds inside and the third if you are lucky but then you usually have to take over for which he is more than grateful.

°,,If two are not enough for my pretty girl...come here my tongue is always happy to satisfy you".

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T = Toys (do they have toys? do they use them? on their partner or themselves?)

°Drumsticks = Not necessarily a toy but just for foreplay and teasing he loves to use his drumsticks. You lying naked on the bed or relaxing? No problem, he simply lets the finely crafted spitezn wander over your body and lets your nipples become hard. Depending on what material the drumsticks are made of, you also let your tongue wander over them and he definitely has a camera with him. There was just created a new wixxvorlage that has burned into his brain.

°,,If you lick them like that again...fuck"

°Bandana = His bandana which he always carries with him is simply used for sex as a temporary restraint or gag. Also great as a blindfold when he wants to tease you with the drumsticks. Believe me, it works wonders. It's practical, soft and more than enough for the moment. And he always has it with him, which makes for a good quickie.

°,,I should have let you wear my clothes much earlier. Damn, you look hot, sweetie".

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U = Unfair (how they love to tease)

°Teasing is his middle name if you ask him. Egall where, when or how? He will as soon as he realises he needs you or just because. He'll start teasing you. A little touch with his hands on the straps of your bra down to your breasts. Knowing full well that the entire black coven is sitting at the table with you in the pinch. But he doesn't care, he's more interested in how you will react.

°,,A little challenge is fun, isn't it?"

°But if you tease him back or start it, it will either throw him off course because he is not quite prepared for it. Or he gets into it right away and gets aroused faster than he notices. At the latest, when you play with his hair and pull on it lightly, it's over and he's all yours.

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V = Volume (how loud are they, what sounds do they make, etc.)

°Hellhammer is not necessarily loud. It depends a little on the environment. If it's in your flat, it will reverberate off the walls. But if you are somewhere outside then he is quieter but still audible to the others. Well audible.

°When he does make noise, it is often praising words and jokes. But when you have him completely wrapped around your finger he is a begging something. He loves to beg you to satisfy him on his knees if he has to. He just wants to be good for you.

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W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

°He wants to do a professional sex photoshoot with you. Not just the pictures from a disposable camera from Euronymous or a more than decent camera from his friends. No, he wants to go with you to a professional photographer and take the most erotic and dirty photos for his special album. And present them to Euronymous as album cover. Sex sells.

°He smokes no big deal himself but when you smoke a cigarette he is completely fascinated like a little boy. His gaze never leaves you and he watches you with perfect love. It's just so fascinating to watch you. You seem almost divine.

°,,Ma'm, you know how you have me".

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X = X-ray (let's look under the clothes)

°As already mentioned, he sometimes rasps his happy trail, but he also likes to let it get to him. The size 16cm/6,29921 is a triumph for him because he is a little bigger than Varg but otherwise normal. The width is not as wide as Faust's but it is still so wide that your fingers barely touch.

°But the wide grin on his lips increases when he catches you staring. You watch him as his fingers steal a little cream from Faust's birthday cake and disappear into his mud. This has to be commented on with a perverted comment. In summer he wears only pants and you don't seem to leave him. He feels like the king. Not least when he's in the shower and you just come to him.

°,,All this sexy stuff is just for you my love.

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Y = Yearning (how high is the sex drive?)

°On the high end for sure. He's not as needy as Varg in his weddings who felt fucked everything and everyone don't get me wrong.

°But at a party with maybe one or two beers he will look for his need faster than normal. Which is not surprising that you both disappear for a little while. Not that he could make it any more conspicuous with his broad grin.

°,,Sweetheart you look good...shall we just you know".

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Z = Zzz (how quickly do they fall asleep afterwards)

°Very quickly as far as that is concerned after the aftercare which is of course sufficient and more than just good. Both of you should feel good in his eyes, even if you are more important to him than he is to himself.

°Which is why he usually falls asleep immediately after the aftercare and has given his last strength to you. With a murmured "love you sleep well" he then turns over or snuggles up to you before you hear his quiet breathing. A cute sight.

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@mayhem-things , @beldamama

[morningstarrook]

Thoughts on the Wisdom Saga

This had been stuck in the drafts for a while, but since the release day for the Vengeance Saga dropped recently, I decided to finally buckle down and finish this. I had initially listened to this saga on release but, as can be clearly seen now, Ive been kinda putting off writing down my thoughts. But no more! Ive listened to the entire saga a second time, and now want to share my thoughts on it.

I’ll put it under the read more because I know I have a lot to say so, I won’t waste anymore time on it.

Song 26 - Legendary

A lovely introduction to this next saga, I must say. I adore the upbeat instrumentals, and I think they work well with introducing Telemachus. In my view, they help kind of push this idea that Telemachus has this naïve sense of being considered a legend, and that he doesn’t yet fully understand the struggles and battles he’d have to face that would come with going down the path of being a hero. And it makes sense, considering it seems like he’s been shut in his room/home for his entire life for his safety, I just find the first half of this song really sweet, and a nice set up of Telemachus’ character, especially when we meet the suitors and, primarily, Anitonius. And can I say, Ayron really put his whole chest into that “BOY” cause DAMN-

All in all, while I don’t have much to say about this song in general, I do like it quite a lot! I’ll give a solid 8/10 :)

Song 27 - Little Wolf

MMM BEEN WAITING FOR THIS ONE CHAT, been waiting for this one specifically for a while. I honestly love the video game imagery used during the live, first and foremost. Secondly, ANITONIUS’ VOICE ???? To get back on track, this is probably the main song I was waiting patiently for and safe to say, I was not disappointed. No thoughts, head empty, just Little Wolf playing on repeat fr

Adore it, no further comments, 10/10

Song 28 - We’ll be fine

I won’t lie, listening to this song for the first time, it caught my eye immediately. And listening to it on repeat after that only served to enhance my love for this song.

The vocals were exceptional and the imagery that accompanied the song even more so. Even if it’s the shortest song in the saga, it just. It’s so good! The best way I can describe it as a sweet little intermission that helped to transition from Little Wolf and Love in Paradise, and the characterization too !!!!! Omg, Athena admitting to seeing Odysseus as a friend and admitting to the fact things could have turned out differently, and all for the better?? Telemachus seeing her a friend immediately?? Athena Ody friendship in general???

Im very charmed by this song, and it has definitely earned its place on my favorite song list overall. I give this song a 10/10

Song 29 - Love in Paradise

Honestly, while Love in Paradise is not a song I listen to on repeat, I can admit I love it dearly, and for lack of a better word, seeing different perspectives for this song and all the dark possibilities that could’ve happened between the 7 years Ody was trapped have been certainly some food for thought. The full showcase of the Time Dive was absolutely stunning, Wangui nailed it with voicing Calypso, and just. I can’t really find any other way to put it instead of just this song was super well done!

All in all? I can appreciate this song for what it is! I’ll give it a solid 7/10

Song 30 - God Games

FINALLY I have been waiting for this song’s release since first hearing the snippet like, years ago? And how was it like hearing the full song? I wasn’t really disappointed!

I always knew that with there being so many gods to go through and many different song sections for each of them, some sections were going to be much shorter than the others. And safe to say, I was proven right in that. But for what we did get, this song was just a banger!

AND THE ENDING???!!?! I SAW THE FINAL PART OF THE ANIMATIC IN THE LIVE AND I FINALLY UNDERSTOOF WHAT THE COMMENTS WERE GETTING AT OMG ATHENA???? Jorge when I CATCH YOU JORGE The plot armor better save her cause her actually armor ain’t gonna do shit! I am not lying when I say I actually shed tears watching that for the first time cause I was just? so?? Flabbergasted?? In the best way ofc :]

God Games is, for lack of a better word, great. I love it, it met my expectations, and the ending of the livestream animatic left me a changed person, I can say that for sure. I give God Games an appreciative 9/10!

Im happy to finally get this out of the drafts, and will be sitting very patiently waiting for the Vengeance Saga to drop (here’s to hoping I can make it to the live but I have my doubts I’ll actually be able to tune in for the entirety of it).

[yonpote]

another thing is like... under capitalism, business success and wealth begin to alienate you from others who don't have that. and that alienation can feed into greed, like why not keep investing and making business deals and buying expensive stuff? and no one around is really going to call you out because they are either capitalist hacks or maybe people who once struggled who now rely on you.

so like, I don't inherently expect much from creators like dnp who come into money. even though they probably have more financial freedom than many other creators because of all the tours, books, games, etc (because they are good at business!)

so like, as their fans who ultimately are their consumers, I think it's good to call them out, especially because they have shown before that they have good intentions.

am I expecting much from them? no. wealth can be corrupting and speaking out comes with risk to business/career interests. but they have a special relationship with their audience, as we're mostly all fellow queer and neurodivergent people with similar interests. so we can provide feedback and be the ones to try to ground them and be like "hey that wasn't cool please do better." stopping engagement with them and their content entirely doesn't really do anything to help, unless they did something they needed to absolutely be deplatformed for. stopping engagement is a valid personal choice, but when I see stuff that begins to resemble like 'they aren't being activists right now time for everyone to unstan' I'm like... if that makes you feel better, fine, but I would rather parasocially / affectionately be like "hey I expect more from you!" in a way that is constructive. which is something I would want to do with my friends, but the difference is, if my friends didn't change or try to then I probably would distance myself from them. Whereas Dan and Phil are entertainers we don't now irl, we have a different relationship with them. but compared to many other creators, they really do tend to be more sensitive to their audience (which has helped their success).

but so this time the (mostly leftist) phannies calling them out actually got them to do a fundraiser so that's cool! even if it's because of the backlash like, that's what the point of backlash is! we should want people to change behavior. not to just abstractly punish them, for something they could be unlikely to do without pressure. though hopefully it will lead to less instances of having to pressure them.

idk this brings up interesting stuff about parasocial relationships, the transactions between creators and their audience, and capitalism. so of course I had to rant about it for a sec lol.

thats completely true! thank u for the rant lol but yeah i dont want to come across as being like, NEVER EXPECT ANYTHING FROM YOUR FAV CREATORS it was more like, with dnp specifically we know where their heart is i guess so it can be unnecessary to call for whatever. BUT you're absolutely right in that they probably wouldn't have done a charity stream were it not for pressure from fans. and maybe this is ME being parasocial but i'd like to think that this isn't for damage control or performativism (i mean it is a LITTLE cuz any publicity is a little bit abt looking good) but rather like, putting their money where their mouth is basically! and showing to their core audience like hey we care about this thing too and we fully hear you.

i was thinking about this General concept wrt dnp because i think there have been other moments where dnp were called out about something or criticized for like their more offensive humor and they stopped doing that and educated themselves which is better than most creators who put up fakeass apology videos. ive seen a lot of ppl say they want dan to talk about and apologize for his racist and sexist humor (and honestly only asking dan but not bringing up that phil also had his share of racist jokes) but it's like. at this point what further could he say? he's not a 21 year old shit head anymore (and yeah good for you for being a socially aware 21 y/o in 2024 but that offensive humor literally was just the culture of that time period) and they both have SHOWN that they have grown and even talked about it in like the pinof react video where they talked about "yeah we bullied kristen stewart a lot cuz it was just popular to make fun of her and justin bieber and that really sucks that we did that" like they have changed and shown change! they do not need to make a grand apology statement cuz like if you wanna talk performativism then lets talk about the fakeness of basically every apology video on the internet????

sorry thats unrelated to what u were talking abt but it just made me start thinking BUT YEAH THANK YOU FOR YOUR HOT TAKES!!!!