#ive not watched enough of the show i guess
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Get to know your mutuals: tag game
thank you for @mapofyourstars and @ashestxr for tagging me 😊😊
What's the origin of your blog title?
when i was a teenager being a closeted pre-transition trans guy i felt really invisible and like i didnt fit in anywhere, a "ghost". and 512 is the name of a song i listened to a lot at the time. nowadays i find the url a bit cringy but im too lazy to change it lol
OTP(s) + Shipname:
honestly at the moment i only care about cherik haha but i appreciate raven x emma and logan x ororo as well :)
Favourite colour:
black for clothes, pink for literally anything else i own
Favourite game:
i have 1500 hours of stardew valley on steam lol. its an absolute obsession. it comes in waves tho, like twice a year ill get hooked on it again and create a new farm to achieve perfection on. other than that, i really loved playing undertale and graveyard keeper.
Song stuck in your head:
this is kind of embarrassing but atm im a bit obsessed with daisy by ashnikko (the ft. hatsune miku version).... I LIKE BETTER MUSIC TOO I SWEAR
Weirdest habit/trait?
pacing around my apartment thinking abt my current obsessions... i used to be so embarrassed but ive come to find out lots of people do this too so thats fine i guess
Hobbies:
reading and playing games, mostly. ive been trying to write more lately too
If you work, what's your profession?
ESL teacher. its not the coolest thing in the world but i really enjoy it
If you could have any job you wish, what would it be? Realistically?
literature professor in uni/published author
Something you're good at:
(literally the same thing ashe, who tagged me, said) i believe im a pretty good writer despite being slow and not doing it that often lol
also i know im a very good teacher (i know its my job so duh but youd be surprised with some of my coworkers...)
Something you're bad at:
keeping secrets, especially my own 😭😭😭
Something you love:
cats, wine and contemporary brazilian literature
Something you could talk about for hours off the cuff:
why i love charles xavier so much and queer/feminist theory.
Something you hate:
uhhhhhh idk my ex i guess (happy valentines day!)
Something you collect:
hello kitty merch 😌😌😌
Something you forget:
dates and appointments, its so fucking bad i put everything on a calender above my desk and i still manage to forget them sometimes
What's your love language?
im very touchy and affectionate but i also love acts of service, like surprising people with small gifts (i believe thats part of acts of service?)
Favourite movie/show:
my favorite movies are xmen fc, dofp and xmen II (obviously) but also amelie poulain and fried green tomatoes
my favorite series are breaking bad and the office, ive watched them both multiple times
Favourite food:
chicken!!!! fried chicken, roasted chicken, chicken with pasta, chicken with rice and beans, chicken with mashed potatoes, give me!!!!!!
Favourite animal:
i was OBSESSED with cheetahs as a child, still love them but in general rn id say cats. also love monkeys
What were you like as a child?
a very idealistic dreamer with a bit of a savior complex (hello charles xavier). not the sharpest social skills.
Favourite subject at school?
in high school it was english just because it was so fucking easy bc i was fluent lol
in uni any of my literature classes
Least favourite subject:
hated physics in hs i was so fucking bad at it. and in uni i'd had ENOUGH of pedagogy classes they were soooo boring and repetitive
What's your best character trait?
im very honest and if i love you i will do anything for you
What's your worst character trait?
probably snapping at ppl sometimes. i know its terrible but i really try not to and i always apologize. up until last year also i always let ppl treat me like shit and didnt set boundaries. im unlearning that now.
If you could change any detail of your life right now, what would it be?
have enough money to only focus on my studies and not have to work lol
If you could travel in time, who would you like to meet?
maybe kim jonghyun. he was my favorite singer when i was younger and he passed away in 2017 :( he was such a great person :(
im not sure who has already been tagged in this but ill tag @caramelc0rgi , @foxherder , @disasterhals , @eriknocherikyes , @stinkrat-aleks , @mooniel, @eriksdefender and any other moots who'd like to do this!
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Everything I've ever seen pertaining to Dr. Who sounds like complete and utter nonsense and I find it rather entertaining
Doctor Who Headcannon:
The Toymaker didn’t use The Giggle until Maestro was Born/Created.
It’s just how Maestro Laughs and The Toymaker found it SO ANNOYING that he literally used it to drive people insane.
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so REVENGE, HUH? or justice, if that makes you feel better. it tastes the same when cooked just right. 'I REALLY WANTED A BROTHER.' such a shame to burn a bridge you so desperately wanted to keep, especially when it wasnt even you who started the fire. especially when you hope that not a single fragment of that bridge ever washes ashore.[MAY IT ROT FAR FROM MY SIGHTS] an unfortunate loss! atleast he has his friends.
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#jrwi prime defenders#jrwi prime defenders spoilers#jrwi pd spoilers#jrwi pd#william wisp#vyncent sol#THIS ONE IS FUUUUCKIN OOOOOLLDD RAAAHHHHH i made it like. a year ago. but didnt finish it for so so long bc i just wasnt happy w it.#BUT LIKE A CENTURY EGG the decades of being encased in salt n lime n ash have done WELL to bring out the flavores of this piece#i sorta recently cleaned it up and posted it onto twitty. didnt tag it bc it was SO OLD AND SCUFFED(i see so many MISTAKES NOW)#that i didnt want to expose it to the open air just like that#if i show smth to my small circles then it shall only be understood in those small circles.#open air and open interpretation from minds i cannot predict are NOT something i enjoy the thought of. usually. i am brave tho#BUT EVERYONE ON TWITTY WAS SO NICEEE i was like damn... i guess it IS good enough to be enjoyed by the masses...#lets work on being nicer to our art together. THAT BEING SAID. i really love my colors here HELL YEAHHHH#FIRST TIME IN A WHILE COLORIN THESE BOYS.... i dont use proper color enough..I ALSO RLY LIKE MY BACKGROUNDS HERE#i LOVE when the bg is hyperrealistic (i frankestiened stock photos) and when the subjects are all flat colored n cartoony#recently rewatched Making Fiends and they do that similar thing!! soft shading! lotsa details! almost painted? ill paint one day#ive already rambled so much abt the art im runnin out of ROOm to ramble about WWWIILLIAM GODDAMN WWIIIISP. its been a minute since i saw-#-this episode..but i DO remember the funny smoke trick that will did to his funny brother. EVERYTIME U GIVE AN ORDER. THAT BRINGS HARM-#-INDIRECTLY OR NOT. YOU WILL HEAR THOSE SCREAMS. YOU WILL FEEL THAT PAIN. OHHH WHAT A COOL PUNISHMENT THAT IS#its still an olive branch in a sense! a final chance for big bro bell to show that hes NOT an irrideemable piece o shit. and if not#well. to the wolves of psychosis with him!!! i really think william did the best he could here. if i was in his shoes i have no doubt i-#-woulda done the same. IM ALSO GLAD THAT VYN DECIDED TO STICK AROUND N SUPPORT HIM! thas character development baybe!!#i loooove prime defenders.. its been so long since i watched any eps of it but i KNOW it still has such a grip on my heart..GOTTA rewatch i
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#not to vague abt a particular niche of a fandom no one cares about BUT im losing my mind a bit#bc there's a ship that literally got me so invested that i read fanfiction for the 1st time. i adore them so much#i think their canon relationship is so fucking lovely and its bullshit what happened to them. if u kno u kno.#but now i go to ao3 and try to find fics and im like... yo y do these all fucking suck?#like i get it. no one has given a fuck abt this fandom since like the 2010s but i mean ive read lots of way better fics for waaaay#tinier fandoms. i guess thoses ppl just cared way more. no one gives enough of a fuck to write a good fic for these 2.#ugh. im probably just being a bitch. like is it bc its a heterosexual ship? is the bar really so low for writing straight relationships that#they have to b so fucking boring immediately???? like what the fuck is happening. i feel like im losing my mind#wheres the passion? where the dedication? wheres the willingness to die for eachother and fight side by side?#its all boring bullshit or weird self insert feeling smut. or maybe its me. maybe im the problem bc i refuse to read the fics that have#adultery and divorce in them bc im so in denial abt the ending of bleach that i cannot stand to even look at#the canon endgame ships. it makes me to angry. so yea maybe im the problem#i jus6 don't understand it. its the same for narut0 x s4suke fics. like????#did we watch the same show??? why tf r u writing them so weird and boring and wrong????#that one i them im right abt bc others have confirmed it. but idk abt these 2. my fucking original otp is cursed to toil away in bad#fanfiction. or maybe all the good fics r on ff dot net. but fuck if im gonna wade thru that hellsite#anyway. this is what u get when u get invested in terrible anime. i mean with peace and love it is my nostalgia show but like u kno#unrelated
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obsessed with their different reactions to being called starcrossed lovers
#im gonna pretend mattie didnt die and visits them sometimes back in toronto#it's such a cute dynamic they have#the two evil (affectionate) sisters who just loving teasing laura#also one of my favourite things abt this show is the choreographing they do for the static camera#i bet it's so annoying to have to think about but i love watching them all move so coordinatedly through the frame#somehow still making it look natural#also i know laura is the storyteller one and i dont really know enough abt romanticism to make any definitive claims abt carmilla#but having scrolled her blog a bit to figure out her tastes in music and art#i wonder if theres a part of carmilla that kind of enjoys being starcrossed. or doomed in a sense#or maybe she that she wouldnt have CHOSEN this story necessarily but that she has resigned herself to it#on account of her vampire nature#and sees a certain beauty in it#that all her romances are doomed#idk. im still figuring her out#also im reinterpreting that exchange mattie and carmilla have in this scene#carmilla calls mattie a utilitarian which is probably right#mattie then callls her a nihilist and carmilla corrects that to existentialist#and mattie says absurdist at best#but those arent designations like back and forth as i had read it before#it's just carmillas philosophy theyre arguing about. i THINK. or maybe it's both of them#putting a pin in that until ive read more books#also kind of obsessed with how laura and danny and maybe the other humans are so quick to ascribe a morality to the vampires#based just on the 'shes a vampire!!' while obviously by necessity the vampires have spent wayyyyyyyyyy more time thinking abt their ethics#or maybe not by necessity for all of them but to mattie and carmilla it definitely seems like a necessity. or inevitability#they mustve spent countless hours over the centuries talking abt this if they can joke abt it in this way now#and in different states too like i can imagine distraught Im A Monster type conversations but also just sort of academic debates and also#carmilla reading some new book that has come out and mattie being like what newfangled thing are you into now#i guess utilitarianism was also newfangled at some point. theyre both older. but you know#carmilla is a poet. dont know if she writes poetry but she looks at things in a poet's way i think#also dont think shes entirely a romantic but i do think some of her tastes lean more toward the romantic
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Disclaimer im just processing some thoughts im not cancelling the show
have almost thoughts about how i find the like....narrative on here that if you have chronic "zebra" conditions youd want a doctor like House and wouldnt sue for malpractice bc at least youd have a doctor that cares about whats wrong with you but lets take it one step further. so often he does NOT give a shit about the patient and actively endangers them frequently with his god damn heoric era of medicine approach? non zero amount of times he gets a diagnosis but it comes too late, or he gets a diagnosis after their first wrong 3 guesses of the episode shut down the patients kidneys and they either have to get a transplant or they are just, doomed due to other preexisting conditions etc? idk. i know ppl are almost certainly exaggerating and just letting off steam about the very real failures of our current medical systems and the ableism baked in and All That Shit. i just think its weird how ppl romanticize House who STILL, FREQUENTLY, MULTIPLE EPISODES will actively dismiss shit in the exact way that is a problem in our current system, especially when hes being Forced Against His Will To See Clinic Parients, he loves to be dismissive as fuck of symptoms and if he was a real doctor i think he'd be fucking 50/50 on cases he Notices Something To Dig Into vs cases he dismisses as an Anxious Hysterical Woman Who Wants Attention, the only reason he's Right so frequently in his snap judgements is cos it reinforces the narrative. its like a crime drama that has the mastermind serial killer masterfully using "loopholes" and lawyering up all sneaky and dodging Justice and if only our poor little cop protags were allowed to do A TEENY BIT of Justified Police Brutality, they could Save Lives!
and like sometimes in the show they will have a patient die despite his efforts to narratively punish him. not to mention, i think its been at least mildly brought up and glossed over how much they absolutely do not think about insurance costs for these ppl for the insane amount of tests that find nothing and Wrong Medications To Force A Diagnosis they use? i think it was brought up once in the episode following a day in the life of cuddy where she had to fight a lawsuit bc a guys insurance like didnt cover his thumb being reattached but chase reattached it anyway while in surgery cos it was The Right Thing To Do and the guy didnt have the money to cover it and the insurance wouldnt pay unless he sued the hospital or whatever. thats like the only time its come up. whereas like frequently the doctor I go to for osteopathic manipulation tries to check in with me and make sure im covered by insurance etc and that im not going to go broke or get buried in medical debt seeing her.
idk. just some Thoughts. not a defense of our current system and all the flaws it enables and enforces etc. his approach to medicine is really reminiscent to me of what I know of the Heroic Era Of Medicine which i dont...love? and hes framed on here as being an asshole but would kill for his patients to get them a diagnosis etc. but hes definitely extremely paternalistic to patients ? and despite some good clippable lines about ableism and being against eugenics, it honestly feels like his stance on that is kind of a toss up.
#toy txt post#AGAIN THIS IS NOT A DEFENSE OF OUR CURRENT SYSTEM NOR AM I TRYING TO 'CANCEL' THE SHOW#i am simply processing some Thoughts about it#and wishing better doctors upon all of you when you need them#doctors who Listen To You and who Put In The Effort and The Work to figure out why you feel like shit#who also arent calling you slurs the whole time and throwing random fucking medications at you that destroy your liver or whatever#but give them data. idk. like sometimes in the show it does seem like they need to do that! like the patient is actively dying and the risk#to info ratio is such that it makes sense. other times its like you like definitely couldve done other things to rule shit out but you#needed to fit this whole patient arc into a single episode#not to mention i feel like any doctor who approached shit even close to the way he does would Not have his success rate#no matter how smart the payoff would Not be worth it bc theyd kill more patients. they would not be getting lucky everytime. real life does#not have a plot narrative to fulfill if house treated you he'd just fucking kill you#also one more disclaimer I AM AWARE DR GREGORY HOUSE IS A FICTIONAL MADE UP BLORBO CHARACTER#AND THAT MOST OF THE PPL JOKING ABOUT THIS DO NOT NEED THE REMINDERS OR WARNINGS OR DISCLAIMERS ABOUT HIM ETC ETC#IM SIMPLY THINKING ABOUT HIM AND THIS SHOW AND REAL LIFE#and am only a little bit uncomfortable w the level to which his approach is romanticized on tumblr dot com. but i understand why and like#fair enough#anyway watching house MD is like a sawbones episode displaced in time and Very Worrying#i just have the finale of s7 left and then i will start s8#and i am dreading the aphobia episode. but it cannot be worse than the horrific intersexism and transphobic he's put on display right#right?#i guess its probably not worse in that from what ive seen on tumblr. he is being aphobic to an adult and not a teenager. so#also house is infuriating bc if you remove the doctor bit. i have met this man so many times and i want to kill him ♡#the guy who is just allowed to stampede through life being a total ass with no pushback or accountability and terrorize people#hes a bad employee and a worse boss#okay turning reblogs off on this cos i dont trust ppl. i think i have replies restricting to mutuals too so#that way this doesnt break containment and get misinterpreted
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theres so many kinds of ways to go about redemption but i love redemption in the powerlessness
like call it a little cruel but i love the idea of someone who got too powerful getting their power taken away and they have to live that life now and become better through seeing what its like on the other side of the line they were so sure theyd never cross
#tropes#theres also the version where people get turned into babies??#if i had a nickel for everytime i saw that in media. id have three nickels. which isnt a lot but its weird that it happened thrice#(spoilers for stuff thats all years old i guess? sky high. wings of fire. and beacon pines is where ive seen the baby trope)#anyway ive been watching schitts creek and ive mostly been like 'whatever i have nothing else to do and its fine enough'#but i just finished season 2 and i saw the beginning of an article the other day about the show#i didnt read the whole article cause i didnt want to be spoiled#and the article was about it being a story of redemption. not that these characters are the worst people ever but i mean#they were rich people#and they obviously thought so highly of themselves and they looked down on the town#but they get humbled over and over and then they give back to the town and they defend it#idk its just nice#ive had my own idea for a story that involves a sorta redemption through powerlessness thing but its obv way different#i also always hear people talk about jewish stories of redemption and im so curious about that#cause ive heard that said a lot about steven universe for example and now im hearing it about schitts creek#so based!#my post
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"... so how's that nutshack hyperfix going, buddy?"
#jeanna's magical art tag!#jerasdoodles#the nutshack#selfsies art#bust a nutshack#jera watches cartoons#memeology#LET'S TALK ABOUT SHIPS#THIS HAS BEEN MAKING ME GIGGLE SINCE I DREWED IT LAST NIGHT#but uh. hi guys i guess im officially the CEO of PhilAngel now. this is terminal.#THERE IS ENOUGH IN ALL 16 EPISODES OF TELEVISION#to suggest that phil is the Least Annoying to/about angel + angel is his most unironic hypeman#and theyve been friends for WAY longer#plus smthn smthn Why Does El Chorizo Look So Fruity Post Resurrection Kick Think#one of these days i should unironically post my nutshack autism here vs my gc cuz#ive been in the fucken trenches. this show vexes me.#im writing fanfiction for the first time since 2019 and Fighting For My Life with all the Caló Codeswitching Send Help#philangel
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sometimes my boobs hurt so much i think they're gonna bleed surely this is normal right
#i think im pmsing.. but im not sure#like the dates aligned but also they've been super irregular hence the whole pcod etc#like im already wearing a size 38 bra because of all this fucking weight gain#and even that feels tight?? like the next size available was free size😭😭#but like it feels normal good even everyday just from the past two days it's been hurting like hell#and fucking worst festivsl of the year so i can't even stay in my room bra off all day#but oh god why do they pain so much it's never been like this before ive been having periods since i was 11 and im 21 now#maybe another pcod uhh idk side effect? symptom? whatever it's called#and i definitely have that pms wali feeling#i mean i haven't broken down yet but#you know that feeling when you WANT something but you don't know what and you try everything but nothing works#like i ate pasta i ate ice cream i studied and accomplished my targets i slept a lot i watched comfort show#i even washed my hair and danced to so many songs today morning while booping#but then it keeps crashing#and it's not enough#don't ask me what's it because even i do not know#i think i want. a hug. i guess#but from my bestfriend#because me and my sister keep fighting and i don't think she's really understanding me rn#but i think she's (bsf) avoiding talking to me because she's getting back together with her shitty boyfriend#i want to call and whine and say fuck that i don't care just talk to me but#i can't#the thought of asking for help needing people is. wow it's genuinely making me puke#i hate hate HATE being pathetic and needy#sometimes i wish#i mean obviously i would prefer it if i was perfectly healthy qnd normal and fine#but sometimes i wish someone just looked at me and said#oh honey how are you carrying so much sadness inside you and hiding it so well?? how are you even functioning???? how are you not#on the floor wailing and crying and unable to get up?#like you need [insert idk pills or whatever the cure is] BADLY
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good night to be a guy who doesnt watch the game awards unless sonic is there
#for the record i do care about games other than sonic . sonic is just my main motivator to watch things like this#and i did look at the nominees and didnt really see anything i cared about other than sonic superstars i guess#but that wasnt enough to make me watch it because i knew it was gonna lose since it was against mario wonder#(which got nominated for like 500 different categories while sonic only got the one. come on man)#ive seen some people speculate that the knuckles series is finally gonna get a teaser at the game awards but.#idk. i feel like they would have said something beforehand if they were. they did last time they showed sonic related trailers there#remember game awards 2021 first full sonic 2 and sonic frontiers trailers double feature. wild
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obsessed with doing this quiz for my ocs. i think its very important that we all know that celyn is 86% j*ghead
#listen ive never watched r*verdale but like. i know enough.#i know celyns first words to jowan were 'in case you havent noticed im weird. im a weirdo. i dont fit in and i dont wanna fit in. have you#ever seen me without this stupid hat on? thats weird.'#also the fact that there are not 1 but 2 different sher/ocks in the top 10 lmao. she is smart ok. but shes not a detective genius#she is however as reclusive n weird as sher/ock is generally portrayed to be so. makes sense i guess#oc: celyn#has anyone watched elementary btw. i tried to watch it bc of lucy liu n bc i've heard it's the good modern sher/ock adaptation#but the pilot episode had me snoozing#maybe the show gets better. or mayb the detective genre is just not for me#ALSO the fact that house is at number 5. i hate it i love it#also maeve at 7 <3 that one i approve of wholeheartedly n unironically#havent watched mean girls in like 10+ years but i also approve of janis ian at 3#never watched parks n rec but based on what i know abt the character april in 1st place also tracks#anyway. mutuals do this its fun <3
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i said i liked that max didn't drop the entire season at once but i take that back. this two episodes a week thingy has me acting normal and even disinterested in one of my favourite shows. wtf
#its not the season itself mind you#ive loved every episode of it so far#i think its fucking great just like the first season#but im used to watching a show at my own pace binging or no#i finish it as fast as i can bc i cant get enough then get completely obsessed#i make a pinterest meme board i start posting on tumblr sometimes i even read a bit of fanfic#i rewatch it over and over for a month i listen to the soundtrack#but its not like that now#i tried to behave like that when the first 3 came out because i desperately wanted it to be like that again#but it kinda faded especially after ep 4 and 5 came out#i loved these episodes i did but its like i cant really completely dive in yk#i feel like ill watch the finale when it comes out then do an obligatory rewatch and then its done#and this is particularly sad because its fucking ofmd. my second favourite show on the planet#season 2 was supposed to he huge for me like in hindsight maybe not go2 level but yk#and now im just. normal about it.#i hate being normal about things#anyway. tags longer than archimedes' lever to lift the world i guess#another one for the void
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oughhhggg. the desire to start doing things that will likely improve my quality of life versus the fear that ill look stupid for trying and people will think less of me
#like a main example would probably be ways of calming urself down when angry#i keep seeing advice like ‘just breathe’ and ‘go to ur happy place’#and yeah those both track. i could definitely benefit from doing that#but the thing is ive seen so many people in shows and movies who have like. stereotypical anger issues#and their ways of managing said anger issues are always played up for laughs because usually its some big tough-looking guy or something#and its supposed to be funny bc its a tough looking guy expressing vulnerability i guess#and i always feel like ill look like a childish idiot#because the thing about a lot of articles on managing uncontrollable rage is that#a good chunk of them are aimed at parents with frustrated toddlers (i.e. ‘how do i manage my child’s anger’)#and that just makes everything feel worse bc then i guess that means im supposed to know all of this already 😭#and i overhear the stuff my little brother watches and they talk about doing belly breathing when you feel mad#and that sounds like it would also be useful but i feel like i cant do that because i got that knowledge from a kids show and im not a kid#and people already treat me like a child enough. i cant risk it any further yknow??? god forbid.#im sick of ppl raising the pitch of their voice to talk to me and laughing at my every move. this would only subject me to further torment.#rant
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started watching warrior nun which means this blog is going to be back on it's bullshit
#of course i had to wait for them to cancel the show to do it#ive been putting it off for so long i hate myself#i guess i finally found a tempting enough reason to watch it
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I need them to announce bungo stray dogs season 6.
#with the way the last season ended i better see what fucking happens!!!!#like why was season 5 announced literally right after season 4 ended but its crickets now 😭 please dont play with me like that#like yes there were 2 years between s2 and s3. and then 2 years between the announcement of s4 and it airing. but still....#i think realisitically there will be another season but i would still like confirmation!#anyway i doooo think everyone should watch this show like truly such good writing and the powers go crazyyyy#i dont even think this show is unpopular bc clearly its popular enough to have 5 season and have lasted 8 years but i think a lot of the#hype died after 2016 bc it took SO long to get s3 but it deserves the hype!!!! like saying this as (mostly) a jjk enjoyer. it deserves that#hype. like if it came out NOW? it would be everywhere i know it!!#on an unrelated note no way have i been keeping up with it since 2016 like thats kind of unheard of for me 😭#i dropped bnha in 2020 and was spotty keeping up with it at best before then and most other animes ive watched#have been 1 or 2 seasons and trapped in no continuation hell#or not hell depending on how you look at it i guess 😭 like i get why they have not picked ons again 💀#and i like 1 or 2 season shows so thats fine with me tbh but damn.... keeping me invested that long especially when there are Years between#seasons is kinda crazy#but i guess when youre writing!#like i always Need to know what happening!!!#thinking about it and honestly i think id have gone nuts if theyd had like a 2 year wait until s5 which might be why they didn't 💀#couldnt cut shit off literally in the middle of an arc
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I genuinely agree with your take. It's true that the trauma Rayla experienced doesn't excuse her actions, but it deeply explains the reasoning behind it. And in a way, you see Amaya soften up after seeing herself in Rayla in terms of being stoic, strong, and lonely in handing things alone. She's opened up more. Callum refuses to let Rayla push him away, that everything they do and face, they do it together, accepting his help and leaning on him for support. Little by little, she's growing and maturing, and I'm proud of her. There's still a long way to go for her, but she will get there.
With all the time that all four of Rayla's parents have spent self-reflecting, whether in the coins or while being alone and self-isolated from the community over the last two years, I sincerely hope that it can transition to all five of them reconciling, healing and repairing their broken, fractured family. No doubt that all 4 of her parents are incredibly scarred, haunted, devastated, and extremely hurt by the failures and negligence committed. Imagine the uncontrollable, horrifying nightmares they must be having of Rayla, being tormented by her memory every night. Their hurt, pain, heartbreak, emotional/psychological torture, and suffering are perhaps far worse than we imagined. I wouldn't even know where to begin with addressing Moonfam's family issues. But they deserve to have their family again after all they've been through.
But Rayla also has a right to feel and express her anger, resentment, disdain, animosity, and even her rage towards all four of her parents for what they put her through. Let her say what she needs to say. Let Rayla be angry and messy.
Seeing people crap on arc two Rayla genuinely makes me sad. I don't think many people truly realize the depth of Rayla's isolation. What happened to all the characters in arc one was horrible (I am not down playing that), Callum and Ezran lost their father, and Soren lost his family, but they all had Katolis to go back to. Their home. Rayla lost EVERYTHING. She lost the assassins who she grew up with and trained her, she lost her home, and worst of all she lost her parents. She lost Runaan and Ethari in one go, only months after her parents. And all she had to remember them by was what they taught her. And they taught her self sacrifice, they taught her to do questionable things in the name of protection and the greater good. Viren threatened everything she loved which WAS Callum and Ezran, and she thought he was still alive. She was stuck in fight or flight mode, she was bathed in trauma. And she had a point in TTM, everyone was just moving on, and didn't take or let her have anytime to truly grieve. She was in such a dark place in TTM and it influenced her decisions. She knows she did something wrong, she knows she hurt Callum. She hasn't brought herself to apologize yet, but why did we stop treating her as human? (Or elf, as it were)
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Also hi, I've recently been liberated from TDP reddit
#he gets it better than anyone. and i fully believe that him knowing that is part of why he did eventually accept her back and fight so hard#understands the hardships rayla has endured with her family and society as well as callum does. callum was actually there to see part of it#for her and defend her once he healed some. i feel like some people who comment on the bond between rayla and callum in s5 being too nice#too quick or whatever may not have the most healthy relationship with some people theyre close to irl. i know thats making a big assumption#but when you truly love and care about someone and are mature enough you understand when its important to accept them back in after theyve#hurt you. it is NOT always appropriate to do so. some people are too toxic to do that with and theyll just hurt you more. but sometimes#thats not the case. sometimes you understand that person deeply and love them as a person so much that you accept them back. which helps#with healing for both of you. again. not always applicable. definitely have to weigh the options on if its worth it to still keep that#person around for your own mental health and stuff. but for these two. it is worth it. especially cuz they both know they have flaws as#their own people but still see it worth it to love each other anyway. its sweet. and i guess some people just cant accept that.#(and are also the kind of people that will probably just hate a lot of women characters anyway no matter what they do)#ive kinda lost the plot here. which im good at doing. but yeah. no one understands rayla as deeply as callum and ez do. and callum even#moreso than ez. he especially knows and understands what is tormenting her. which some toxic people who watch the show dont seem to#understand. also id like to add- the trauma that has happened to rayla does not EXCUSE her actions. what she did was still bad. but her#trauma does EXPLAIN her actions. those are 2 distinct things that once realized can help with recover and growth imo. and i feel like#callum knows that to at least some extent#imo more people need to understand the concept of 'this doesnt EXCUSE their actions but does EXPLAIN them' because it really is good to#remember for irl stuff. for both themselves and other people. its a concept i do not think a lot of toxic people grasp.#in any fandom and irl#im rambling so so bad rn im real sorry#< i hear you. no worries. i completely understand.#you bring up a lot of valid fair points#appreciate your take on it#apologies for my rambling as well#the dragon prince
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