#ive never shared a fanfiction or anything like this before

[clawfootcoffin]

Hey, sorry it took me a while but I had read the first MISE statement and I wanted to share some comments but I wanted to re-read it first to remember what I wanted to say but I can't find it now, pls help. Anyway I want to briefly say I liked it and I'm curious to see where it goes next. Eye-related shenanigans are always fun.

ahh yeah, so sorry!! i took it down to edit and.. forgot to reupload it (,:

i really appreciate your interest & sharing your feedback is always welcome!! 🖤 i wasnt very happy w that vers, ill def post it again once it’s been Cut Down…

now that im free from the icy grip of exams (at least for Now), i plan on updating MISE more frequently! maybe smth like every other weekend. i have 6-7 statements planned out atm, so it’s just a matter of putting pen to paper!

and since youre here.. ill let you in on a little smth. one of the MISE statements im most excited abt writing explores.. exactly how the people of salem learnt not to burn their witches.

again, im soso happy that you read & liked it! the First Ever MISE liker… history will remember you fondly

[ggyweek2024]

GGY Fanweek 2024

Hello Gregory/GGY fans!! March 7th is coming up next month, aka the original release date of the TFTP book GGY, and it will be its FIRST anniversary!!

to celebrate, I (@puhpandas) am hosting a GGY Fanweek! Heres some more info below:

The week will take place from March 1st to March 7th

This prompt list above has two word prompts, and an AU prompt for each day in the week. there are not three prompts each day unless you want there to be, theres just multiple options!

for each prompt, you can use your art medium to create something centered around that prompt. the usual is art/fanfiction, but other mediums are welcome!

each prompt is very widespread and can be anything you want it to be. its up to you to come up with something cool! All characters other than GGY are welcome. The only must have for each prompt is that it includes GGY somehow. whether it be past, present or future.

dont be a freak. no NSFW allowed along with the usual weird stuff. it will not be reblogged on this account and shared if so. if your work includes anything extreme like gore or certain phobias, please tag accordingly!

This prompt list was released as early as it was to give every participant enough time to preemptively create for each day.

All 7 days are NOT required to participate. you could only create for 1 day and it'd be just fine. this is for fun!

when each day arrives, post your work on tumblr and tag this account and tag #ggy fanweek 2024. its totally allowed to share your work elsewhere as well!

You are not to post your work until the week arrives, and you only post your work on its respective day. (example: day 5's prompt only when it is day 5 of the week)

Each work will be reblogged on this account so it will all be in one place! like an archive

when the week arrives and you post your work, PLEASE tag this account! i need to be tagged so i can reblog your work here!

For any fic writers, if you post your work on ao3 (not required), it would be awesome if you added your fic to the GGY Fanweek ao3 collection

Have fun!! this entire event is all just to have a good time, so please no stress! create whatever you want to in your own time, no matter how much or little. this is to celebrate GGY/Gregory, so let all your passion loose here!!

edit since ive seen some people confused about the AU prompts: the AU prompts are not for an already existing/established AU by me or someone else. its a 3rd option if the word prompts dont interest you, but im also just giving you a scenario to place the characters of your liking into. even if youve never seen an example of the AUs before, theyre pretty self explanatory in their names!

another edit: for archive reasons, I'll be tagging every reblog of every week contribution with tags that apply. for example, I'll be tagging which day the post is for and which prompt they chose. I'll also be tagging every character involved in the work.

so if you ever want to navigate the blog and find works for a specific day or prompt, this is how! in the search bar type a characters name and it should show you everything applying to them! this also works for specific days and prompts!

[anemoiashifts]

how tiktok failed the shifting community

& how shiftok keeps you stuck idk what to call this. 🫶🏻

to make this clear, i do not hate tiktok. i dont hate people on tiktok who want to shift. i dont have a problem with people on tiktok talking about shifting.

this post is not about anyone specific. ive sold a shifting journal on amazon. which may seem hypocritical though ive never made a promise that it will make you shift & its not supposed to.

!! this post isn’t an excuse to push all the communities problems on shiftok. much like the animal crossing community pre-new horizons, as communities grow bigger, its expected to bring some toxicity with it. problems exist in all corners of the internet & in certain groups.

however, there is a specific issue within the shifting community that involves tiktok & that is the integration of money & profit being made off of people’s desperation.

shifting was / can be presented as this alternative “safe place” & escape for people with serious mental illness that consist of not wanting to be living this life anymore. & that’s fine on its own. everything we do is a form of escapism like readings or watching tv. as long as it’s healthy, it’s harmless. ive touched on permashifting & sv!c!d4l ideation before but id like to piggyback off of that point.

to clarify for everyone new: i am not against perma-shifting. i am against some of the langue that is used around it. you don’t need to k!ll yourself to shift. this is what im speaking about.

when you have an audience that is deteriorating & only going through the motions of life, when your only desire is to get out of the situation you are in, is it extremely easy to profit off of vulnerable people. this fact paired with tiktok — where you get paid & your income is dependent on engagement — it becomes overwhelmingly clear why pushing out content that keeps their audience within arms reach of actually shifting. it’s more profitable if you have an audience of people who can’t shift & want to as opposed to an audience of people who can shift & don’t need validation from exterior sources. it becomes easy to ignore people’s struggles if that’s what you’re making money off of. there is a lack of a healthy viewpoint & balance within some parts of the community.

calling back to 2020 when shiftok was in its infancy, there was a lot of “pov” & storytime style content. there is nothing wrong with wanting to share your experiences but making “entertainment” is arguably much, much easier & profitable. keeping that in mind, why i believe the practice of shifting is so seemingly popular amongst a younger demographic is because it brings fandom spaces together. it’s one thing to watch a show & obsess over fictional characters & read fan fiction but to live alongside your favorite character & be equal with those you idolize, it can sound very appealing. keeping shifting as entertainment style content, it makes it no different then fanfiction & oc’s. again !! i have no problem with people speaking about their experiences / wants for when they shift but the issue is when people only focus on that & it becomes a numbers game.

i hold no issue with people selling their labor in any community but when you sell something with the promise to “make you shift” is when it becomes problematic. when you sell false promises & empty hope, you are also banking that your audience is desperate enough to cling to anything that reminds them of what they want. it speaks to how the creator views their audience to an extent & id argue is aware of the dozens of (mostly) children expressing their negative worldview that displays an unhealthy mentality.

this is why i don’t do general readings as frequently & personal readings at all anymore. quite honestly, it’s easy engagement. while not my intention, people often change their perspective & “make” things fit their situation. i hate hate hate to say this but in desperation, you can make a sign out of anything. this is not me trying to take away the feeling of internal knowing. to give this thought weight, i remember a while ago i posted a reading that was & has been channeled from a person in my desired reality. the comments were flooded by “i know who this is from” & “this is from this person in my dr”. i clarified in the video — the very first slide — that this was from a specific person & everyone completely ignored that fact to fit their beliefs. if you find meaning in something that’s great but when something is explicitly stated as one thing don’t manipulate it to fit yourself if it’s not truly meant for you. not every reading is supposed to resonate. by forcing it to it removes the intimate aspects of what is truly just for you. if everything has meaning, nothing has meaning.

circling back to my idea before, readings & “this message was meant for you content” does open the floodgates to tell their audience what they want to hear for the sake of growth, profit, engagement. yes, there are some readings that don’t pander to a specific group of views but those “stop scrolling this was meant for you, he’s thinking about you, if you see this letter or number it’s a sign & you should be expecting a phone call or someone to reach out to you soon” readings that come up on your fyp are eight times out of ten for engagement purposes & to tell you what you want to hear by using generic langue to make profit. no, not all readings are set up this way and not everyone thinks like this. there are plenty of people who don’t do it for money or attention. even if people did it for money, some people hold issue with that while others don’t. the like it or not, just make sure you’re doing it in a way that’s not making peoples mental situation worse & giving others false hope.

while not reading based, this sounds familiar when we acknowledge “shifting symptoms”. early on, people seemed to take them as being close to shifting & literally feeling the process of you becoming apart of your desired reality. now we know, all those tingles & twitched are only your body checking to see if you’re asleep. the name becomes very mis-leading when you take into that content.

the tldr of this post was when you intertwine spirituality & profit in spaces where people are desperate for something that feels larger then them, people’s actions can put bad tastes in people’s mouths. looking at tiktok, views = money. when numbers are given to people who have shifted & deemed influencers (because that’s how tiktok was pretty much designed) it becomes easy to see why some idolize to be like these people’s — “they shifted & i didn’t, they seem to have everything figured out, they must be better at it then i am, they must be special & not like the rest of us.” it creates a cycle of self doubt, unfortunately, while keeping you in the same “i can’t shift” mindset while these same people are selling a piece of them that you seemingly “lack”.

[fictionfixations]

going through 2.5

2.5 STORY SPOILERS

trigger warning later of minor character death. shown off screen but is described in a way that could sound horrible to the faint of heart

WHAT

i know i joked in my previous post when going through 2.4 that it sounded like the start of a fanfiction but im genuinely disgusted by this ew i was really fucking tempted to just write a fic where jiaoqiu beats his ass (even though i know hoolay is way more powerful then him) but also 2.5 already came out so i gotta get through the story before i get spoiled

the smart choice would be to do 2. but also fuck you hoolay im doing 1. HHH jiaoqiu's voice sounds so like. stressed. like trying to have composure but you can tell hes struggling a little.

also im sorry but hoolays human form looks so fucking ugly (okay maybe im biased but also FUCK YOU HOOLAY) idk ppl might still simp for him but also fuck you im on jiaoqius side >:(

STOPPP USING THE WORD ALPHA like ive heard it so many times in media im DONE i cant hear it the same 😭

"💀 " "None Can Hurt Me" UHHMSOFJFO i sure hope nothing happens to you buddy but

BURN BABY BURN

what the fuck im scared

wait but so i CAN go try to get help? IM SCARED WHAT HAPPENS. uh. uh. uh. FUCK YOU HOOLAY IM DOING IT

wait if i do this will he die. like the the the npc?!?!??!?! GUYSS

AHAHa.. AHgahah.... im. so fucing nervous

im. ohhhh fuck literal chills. im. should i look at what other options i can do to escape or. im so fucking stressed holy shit. logically speaking if jiaoqiu leaves and the ship gets sabotaged or whatever he could die (both him and npc). if he asks him to send a message then the npc will die. guys i hate this what the fuck

I HATE THAT ITS RED TEXT. okay with acheron it was a little startling but we never got like a warning that OUR ACTIONS have CONSEQUENCES. im so fucking scared

me too man. me too. idont want jiaoqiu to die thoguh what if what we choose changes whether or not he dies in canon im

okay ive talked to everyone. and the warning text for everyone is

the skarskiff(?) guy is just an ordinary person the realm keeping person is not prepared for this kind of emergency and that the cloud knight doesnt have backup (has the same choice options as the realm keeping person of borisin are here and introducing ourself)

also that we're being watched. who the fuck

okay the best option would be to cloud knight. but also is it a good idea? no. but. hiusgh. oh my god i hate this.

IM GOING TO BITE THE BULLET. i dont trust that this will end well for me but the logical option even if i get fucked later is to alert someone. a cloud knight knows what risks and responsibilities they're taking on by becoming one and if they die well fuck man but i REFUSE to just not do anything because that'd be like. playing into hoolays hands which 1. i hate him. 2. as a person who very much values my independence I NEED OUT OF THIS SITUATION

and maybe its what hoolay wants, for us to fail his 'test' but whatever. IM REBELLIOUS. (and probably really dumb)

cant wait to see how this affects story in the future. and also seeing how different choices affect things when i watch other people do this. haha. but predicting that they might not talk to anyone out of fear IM going to talk to someone

uhh im going to introduce myself first. its like how you're meant to share your address first in emergencies or something i think maybe? because if the call cuts out then they can find you quickly (i think your phone can be tracked but it takes awhile its not that easy i think?)

okay i did it. wheres the guy who was watching me i cant remember where he was. is he gone? did he disappear? i acnt tell im so fuckings tressed

nothing happened but. but the cloud knights gone now (presumably to spread the news)

i. do i tell other people ? do i. im. okay im

i only talked to the cloud knight. and then im going to do what hoolay asked. thats it. im not brave or reckless enough to tell eVEryone

HIS VOICE IS TREMBLING for the 100th time i hate this

GUH

I FORGOT THEY HAVE OFFICIAL IDENTITIES PRETENDING TO BE--

oh fuck MY DUMBASS

his voice... AGHH JIAOQIUUU

GO FUCK YOURSELF YOURE NOT THE BOSS OF ME

i knew it. i fucking knew it. IM JUSTIFYING IT TO MYSELF BECAUSE CLOUD KNIGHT YOU BECOME IT KNOWING YOU COULD DIE OKAY. id rather have tried to escape then not at all and prove his racist belief 'right'. okay i know im probably in the wrong because they couldve lived if i didnt do anything and i had a hunch that they wouldve died if i asked for help. but. okay at my core i am selfish. and for all i knew there was a teeny tiny chance that it couldve succeeded

and listen. im quoting twisted wonderland now.

"Zero is zero no matter what you multiply it by, right? But if you take some form of action, that zero could potentially become 0.001. And 0.001 has a chance of becoming 100. In which case, there's no reason NOT to do it." (Book 6 - Chapter 48 • A Sequel Cut Short)

i hate these kinds of mind games.

hoolay fucking yapping and i know we're in a tough situation meant to demonstrate how jiaoqiu's kind of powerless but hoolays just talking about how jiaoqiu will eventually crumble and im just. yeah okay big talk. and like i get that hoolay does have connections still and ppl pretending to be foxians keeping a close eye on everything and genuinely wont hesitate to kill someone but okay i just hate him

god he sounds like one of those people who are like. when you refuse their advances and they go 'oh so youre playing hard to get huh?' and keep going with the belief that we definitely want them or some shit💀

i should pretend. but no i cant. thats not the kind of person i am.

oh shit. yeah okay remind me that maybe this could potentially lead to jiaoqiu dying in canon. i mean. its happened in npc stories before right? like that one person in penacony who we could choose to stop her from falling or let her fall

but fucking OW. hoolay talking doesnt terrify me. and maybe thats why im choosing all the dumb options. but ow.

does he have this pose if we pretend to show weakness? i mean maybe its cause we got hurt and hes exaggerating it and showing weakness then. or maybe it actually hurts like a bitch and he cant help but show reaction.

OMG MOZE

okay actually other idea of jiaoqius plan. contacting someone for help and deliberately being caught so its not suspicious if we go along with his demands too easily (but having another plan to get help thats more secret)

like okay i know it was my choice to try to get help and fucking it up but still canon-like right. although i doubt he'd be okay sacrificing an innocent life so um oops

AHHH FUCKING LITERAL CHILLS. we got jiaoqiu flashback where he was like a healer on the battlefield. i dont think im saying that right i forgot what theyre called. but like remember feixiao mentioning in 2.4 how jiaoqiu healed her, and later became her like main healer or something something i forget the wording

and then it goes black and we hear hoolays voice. i have a little hunch that it might be the thing to stop the lupitoxin's effects starting to fade, nad thus the toxin starting to affect him

hh his voice... :(

yeah okay so let us go

sorry did he just bite someone and they turned into a borisin or did it just get rid of the guys disguise

i wasnt paying attention to who it was. i know it wasnt mok tok (different appearance, also it showed jiaoqiu turning away to not see it and mok tok standing there while that was happening)

its genuinely so confusing trying to tell who is a foxian and whose a borisin cause disguises but i assume its an actual borisin who was disguised...

hes talking to moze but all i can hear is monke from ben's stream (aka moze's EN VA LMFAO)

OH IT WAS A NORMAL FOXIAN

what if he does it on jiaoqiu but then they figure out how to turn jiaoqiu back to normal and learn how to cure feixiao. right? right??? probably not but im so stressed

HOLY SHIT JIAOQIU. he sounds so.. wrung out. exhausted.

acting is fucking 10/10 he sounds kind of unhinged but in the slow still exhausted but with emphasis on some of the words?? like. like he still has fight in him. i dont know how to explain this but its really cool

oh shit does he die now

hooly fucking shit literal chills the text appearing on the black screen actually like communicating in a way to us and helping us get an idea of whats going on

okay major manga spoilers for demon slayer. but here is my next prediction: he has poison in his blood that will affect the borisins if they drink it, like how shinobu kocho had like a shit ton of wisteria in her blood (it was also under her fingernails and shit like that, she put it EVERYWHERE) so that when douma (who killed her sister) ate her he'd be poisoned and severely weakened

AM I RIGHT??

I. FUCKING. KNEW ITTTTTT

okay well it was pretty obvious because right before it mentioned the green peppers(?) thing and how to get a picky child to eat it, it re-mentioned that conversation. and then changed it how to get a wolf to something something i already forgot so it was obvious

but JIAOQIU LETS GOOOO i really hope you didnt die

no wait but shit

okay so i cant share any more images i hit the limit on tumblr but okay so if he consumed poison (ist tumbledust. i already forgor. was it like the thing thats like a sedative thats good in small quantities but lethal in large quantities? or was that like yabruh or something)

does that mean he'll die anyway or

i dont think jiaoqiu said it in front of hoolay but anyway im so unhappy that cutscenes lag for me (hoolay immediately clocks on that it was probably jiaoqiu who poisoned him but sdhfuf. this MEANS that hoolay drank JIAOQIUS BLOOD?!?!?!?!? is he DEAD??? )

also i HATE the hoolay fight im struggling so bad ahuisdhdisuad

YANQING LETS FUCKING GOOOOOO (boutta trigger hoolays jingliu trauma)

im sorry for accusing you of being a disguised borisin, sparkle traumatized me ok (and im sorry for pinching your cheeks in 2.4 being cautious of if you were a fake but also i didnt know that was what that option meant)

you were just acting really weird so i got stressed but LETS GOOOO

WHAT WE'RE FIGHTING HIM AGAIN????? YOURE FUCKING WITH ME

oh shit feixiao boss fight

heyy her character. trailer?? i think thats what it was called teased this. like cause she got drunk and couldnt recognize jing yuan and fought him (briefly)

YANQING FUCKING POPPED OFF THIS STORY

i (think) all thats left is feixiao boss fight that we saw in the livestream

some stuff. ill do wardance later. but im gonna end this post here. havent gotten to the end but i dont think ill have anything else to share and i dont have space here anyway so brr

OH FINALLY I CAN ACCESS DIFFICULTY MODES

AND YOU CAN CHOOSE THEM WHILE IN STORY OH THANK FUCK casual mode my precious

okay we figfhting preceptor oh

dan heng: the oath of the alliance doesnt matter to me because im not a part of the alliance anymore *attacks*

me using imbitior lunae dan heng in battle: uh. uh. uh. uhm. YEP

anyway jiaoqius alive (he almost died though)

he sounds so more subdued :(

HOLY SHIT HES BLIND? OH MY GOD thats both better and worse than i thought

OH MY GOD TINGYUN

i was so confused on ruan mei appearance but OH MY GOD

[daedalusdavinci]

29

29. Favourite fanfiction(s) of your ship(s)?

you may not know this already, but i have a recs tag where i post exactly this in depth! but i LOVE to boost my favorite fics, so ill do it all again, just for you anon <3 if you want more recs for any of these ships, i promise there are TONS in that tag, (or you can send me another ask for something more specific,) but ill stick to just my absolute top reads in this post

my favorite fanfictions of my favorite (homestuck) ships

starting under the cut bc it got long slkdjnfsjdfn

for halquius, the funniest hs ship-

Second Chances by @mtjester

Lil Hal never said anything about what it meant to be the AI avatar of the God of Heart. After he and Equius had split, everyone had assumed he would go back to Dirk and serve as a sort of spirit companion, the hyper-perceptive Shades of the God of Heart. But to that, he had simply responded, “Nah.” He stayed firmly on Equius’s face, and Equius asked him no questions about it.

this fic is so in character. it captures some of my favorite things about this ship, like how obnoxious they are and the very specific ways they click and enable each other. it also has an absolutely fantastic sequel! its short and funny, and always the first rec i drop for this specific ship.

(the second rec i would drop is my own fic, Hold Me (Accountable). its a space au with mechanic!equius and bounty hunter!AR, and i maintain that its hilarious and a must read if you like this ship at all.)

my resident favorite ship, eridave-

Lee Shore by @jumpingjacktrash

“I asked Egbert to ask you if you have Ampora’s new contact information.” “No, man, I didn’t even know the old info was old. How can you not have a contact for him? It’s not like he changed his chumhandle, email, and phone number all at once.” “As a matter of fact, that is apparently exactly what he did. And deleted his Facebook and his photo blog.” “Dramariffic.” In the years after the game, the twelve trolls and eight humans have tried to stick together, because no one else would understand. When Eridan misses one of their yearly reunions, Dave makes an impulsive decision to go find him.

ive said it before, and ill say it again. this is THE eridave fic. this is the one. if you only ever read one (and its not one of mine), it should be this one. i love how dave takes eridan seriously without enabling him, and how easily they both cut through each others bullshit. the handling of eridans character is DELICIOUS, and i literally think about his relationships with the other trolls in this fic all the time. i dont even know how many times ive read this fic but it goes so hard.

davekat, the classic-

Fait Accompli(cation) by @dragonomatopoeia on tumblr

In Which a Mutant and an Alien Meander Towards a Quadrant of Indeterminate Identity at a Glacial Pace While Examining the Internalized Toxicity Perpetuated by Their Respective Societies, and The Nature of Friendship is Determined to Be More Universal Than Originally Theorized [Banned In Alternia]

this is the quintessential meteor fic. its everything you could ever want in a meteorfic, and deals very heavily with karkat and dave unpacking toxic cultural ideas from their respective planets and coming to a new understanding of who they want to be together. its long, its slowburn, its everything, and the authors put SO much obvious effort and research into getting the voices just right, i still think about and admire it years and years later.

The Eurydice Suite, v2.0 by @callmearcturus

Dream-sharing: a highly illegal little industry in which agents delve into people’s dreams, and unearth their deepest secrets and memories. Within this business, the Strider-Lalondes are known as the best there is — until Dirk Strider gets his fool-ass trapped within the confines of his own subconscious, with his Auto-Responder playing malicious prison warden. To save him, the best and brightest dreamers in the world will have to form a team. Backed by the token rich friend, lead by the surliest extractor ever bribed out of retirement, haunted by the shade of the latest, greatest agent in the biz, and on the run through a dangerous tiered dream in a hostile mind… It’s going to take a miracle to pull this one off.

arc doesnt need any publicity from me, bigname that they are, but i gotta say of all of their fics this one is one i still come back to and reread from time to time all these years later. the au is really cool, and the drama is potent. karkat and dave have a very loaded and complicated, vaguely antagonistic relationship that takes time to get resolved, and you dont see that very often in davekat fics!

davekat, the superior-

Crash Standing by @asukaskerian

It’s been eight days since the end of Sburb and Davesprite is not coping especially well.

IVE SAID IT BEFORE ILL SAY IT AGAIN. BEST. HOMESTUCK FIC. dont look at how many times ive read this dont worry about it. davespritekat is just better than davekat, okay? im sorry. everything is better w davesprite. if youre a davesprite fan i dont even have to say anything else you already know youve gotta read this, but for people who arent- dude, this fic. its such a poignant snapshot of the awkwardness of teenagerdom, especially as a very traumatized teen, and the interpersonal relationships between characters outside of the main two are just so delightful. the john&dave&davesprite dynamic is one i think about constantly, and me and my friend STILL have running jokes about davesprite co< kanaya, which is perhaps the greatest thing to ever be invented, and we have fully incorporated the phrase "sparkle princess alone time" into our day to day vocabulary. i LOVE the gossip chumps, they are everything to me. underrated friendship.

another classic age ship, johndave-

play ball! by spacepuck

When Dave moves to Washington, he expects to spend the summer alone in his room until school starts. But when he stumbles on the sandlot, he discovers a baseball team needing one more player. He quickly gets dragged into the mix, but there's just one problem: he knows absolute dicksquat about the game. Luckily, John, the high school's best baseball player, swoops in to help. (this is basically a sandlot/baseball au. happy summer!)

ive actually been meaning to reread this one, since its been a long time. im adding it to my marked for later rn. i think of all the johndave fics i ever read, this is the one i think about the most years later. ive never read a fic that just. FELT like summer the way this one does. its intimate and sweet and its got the exact feeling of a hot summer night, lying in the grass and staring up at the stars with your best friend. when i read a johndave fic, i want some real fuckin falling in love with your friend as a stupid kid shit, and this is that

dirkjohn-

Vanitas Vanitatum by @oxfordroulette

You've determined the hobbies of the monarch you serve are as follows: 1. Ill-timed pranks. 2. Cooking. 3. Subconsciously pulling elaborate political schemes off perfectly, ad infinitum, every one of which inches his mind closer to some ineffable dark chasm you're curious to find the depth of. Anyway, he makes damn good lasagna.

when i tell you this is the best dirkjohn fic i mean nothing else has ever even COMPARED, and that includes my own goddamn fic. fuck ammfh, read THIS. its political intrigue and messy, MESSY relationships, and a john who is an absolute delightful trickster with serious fucking PROBLEMS. the john/vriska/dirk friendship in this is everything, and the design of the strilondes is so fucking cool??? im ngl i think about those blindfolds everyyy time i make an au. its magic, its kingdomstuck, its dnd, its got illustrations, its EVERYTHING. oxfordRoulette is like a fucking professional at writing fics where everyone kind of sucks and is super toxic and a little bit evil and its THE BEST. LOVE this fic

for bropsii-

just read anything by captorvatiing. just go do that. or read the entirety of the @askpsii blog again?? for the ten millionth time? and cry about how theres like no content.

all of my other favorite ships are too niche to have fics </3 lol. read MY fics, thats what you should do. just go read the fics for the tags that i personally started sldkjfnsdlfsdf

ALSO YOU SHOULD READ LET'S BE OUTCASTS BY @curlicuecal. this is the only time ill ever recommend anything thats incomplete but GOD ITS SO GOOD. i wont say anything else. just that its SO. GOOD. and if you like hal or the exiles you will LOVE this

[chopprface]

dinobot brainrot post cause im so excited about this fic like DESPERATE to ramble about it its so nuts

some of these are general hcs for dinobot and bw cybertron cause i really love digging into the implied flaws of post great-war cybertron. also i like to mix in little tidbits of various continuities i know about into everything so some elements like functionism from mtmte and extra stuff from beast wars comics throughout the years may show up. ill keep them as vague as i can so no one feels lost but i cant totally promise itll be coherent..

-dinobot has a pre-beastwars name! hes deadbolt :) yes i know hes supposed to be 'dynobot' before bw but thats lame. totally different names are cooler plus it gets to be like a dramatic moment when you mention their pre bw cybertron name because you KNOW shits getting serious. -anyway pre-beastwars he wanted to settle down be a historian/archivist, but because of predacon distrust, a resurgence in functionist ideas, and a repression of actual history, he never got to see it through and in normal canon he just joins megatrons group of predacons. -HOWEVER in the au im working on he instead decides to further science (mostly for plot reasons maybe ill flesh it out more as i write.) and fuses his spark with rampage/protoform x's on colony omicron. the experiment is overseen by the imperial peace marshal of the colony, depth charge. -all seems to go well at first, but deadbolt is frequently dehumanized by the maximal scientists eventually decides to escape, causing a massacre similar to what rampage does before bw starts

-flash forward 4 years/stellar cycles, several more violent escapes including one on starbase rugby (mentioned in the show) he ends up facing trial by the tripredacus council, who decide the best course of action to deal with deadbolt is to turn him back into a protoform, put on the axalon disposed of on a different, uninhabited planet. this totally will not go wrong and WILL NOT cause problems for the maximals on the axalon later. definitely not.

anyway thats all i can share right now :3 fic coming sometime before im dead (I HAVE TO WAIT A WEEK FOR MY AO3 ACCOUNT TO BE CREATED UGUUH) im working on finalizing the first like.. chapter idk fanfiction terms ive never uploaded anything ive written onto a site lol

[virtie333]

Day 30 - Life Day Damerey Celebration

Prompt: Life Day

Summary: Poe's thoughts of Life Day after personal loss

Notes: I wrote this the day after Christmas last year, the first Christmas without my mom, and it kind of sums up what the holiday was like for me that year. 2022 was by far the worst year of my life.

On the day before I posted this, I received a negative... well, not a review, but a comment... on one of my Modern AU stories.

It made me wonder how, when so many people are just trying to live their lives the best they can through horrors and depression and thoughts of suicide, why someone would take the time to hate on someone they don't even know. My writing and sharing of fanfiction has literally kept me going through all the above, so I want to thank those of you who take the time to say good things, nice things, and who understand exactly what I have been going through, because they have been there.

Thank you.

Warnings: Talk of the death of a loved one

AO3

Poe sat quietly by himself on the far side of the room, watching the many people that filled the space, but not seeing them.

He hadn’t wanted to come tonight, but Finn had begged him to, and he couldn’t deny the people he loved anything. Finn’s excuse was that it was the first Life Day since he and Rose had been married, and Poe supposed that was an okay thing to be happy about. Firsts were important. Your first Life Day married. Your first Life Day after a war. Your first Life Day after a child was born.

Your first Life Day since your father died.

Kes Dameron had passed away over ten standard months ago, and Poe had thought he was done grieving and mostly back to normal, but the holiday reminded him that normal would never be the same. He would never stop grieving. Not really. It would come and go, ebb and flow, but it would never end. As long as he loved his father, he would mourn his father.

Life Day had always been a big deal in the Dameron household. Even after his mother died, his father managed to keep the traditions they had all celebrated together the same. Only now did Poe realize how hard that must have been for his dad, and he knew the grieving man had only done it for Poe. Every year, Life Day was celebrated with traditional songs, foods, and gift giving. Even when Poe wasn’t home on Yavin IV, they still found time to connect and share with each other the events of the day. Only during the few years of the war had they not done this, if only because Poe didn’t dare contact his father; there was no way he was taking the chance that the First Order would find Kes and use him against Poe, who had been on their Most Wanted list for years.

But then the war had ended. Poe was able to go home, and he and his friends were able to celebrate Life Day together at the Dameron Homestead. Within two years, Poe was married, had become a prominent advisor for the New Republic’s Department of Defense, and had become a father. Life was perfect.

Until Kes informed Poe he had been diagnosed with lung cancer.

The doctors believed it was a result of Kes’ exposure to toxic gases used by the Empire during the Galactic Civil War. Though minimal, it had eventually caught up with him. Poe and his family took leave from their respective jobs and came to Yavin IV immediately. They were by Kes’ side when he died two weeks later.

Life had gone on. Slowly but surely, things became better. Poe had dealt with death many times. Two of his best friends, Muran and Snap, both died in their fighters right before his eyes. Commanders and those under his command, friends and former friends. The hardest death had been Leia’s, but the eminent attack from Palpatine’s fleet had prevented him from focusing too much on that loss until much later. He had loved them all in one way or another, but none had been his father.

Now it was Life Day, that special holiday that he and his father had always managed to share the same delight in. And now his father was gone.

He wasn’t mad at the people around him for celebrating. He wasn’t jealous of their joy. In reality, he simply felt nothing. No sorrow. No resentment. He was just… empty.

It was while the group in front of him started singing one of his favorite songs for Life Day, Gaudete, a familiar and beloved presence appeared next to him. He closed his eyes, letting the ancient High Galactic language play in his ears as the feeling of comfort and peace filled him. The Force. Sometimes he thought it was the only thing that had gotten him through the last few months.

He felt his wife, the bearer of that powerful Force energy, tuck her hand under his arm and lay her head on his shoulder. She he never strayed far from his side this past horrible year, despite the fact they both had obligations away from each other. Even when they were apart, if he started having a depressive episode, she would know, and come to him. She claimed she wasn’t using the Force to read his emotions, but that she could simply tell by his voice, his body language, the look in his eye even over a holocom. And when she was with him again, life became bearable once more.

Which told him that it wasn’t the Force that had kept him going.

It was Rey.

She never pushed him to talk, but she listened when he did. She never told him he should talk to a councilor, but she encouraged him when he chose to. She never pressured him to ‘just do it’ when he didn’t want to. She was his silent support, her strength and love palpable, even to a non-Jedi like him. He asked her once how she could still be there after so many months of his moodiness and disassociation. She reminded him that he had done the same for her during the months following Exegol. It was how she fell in love with him.

And as Poe felt her physical and mental warmth fill him, he realized with a strange certainty that he was falling in love with her, all over again.

He heard the familiar giggle of his daughter, and looked over to see Suralinda dancing to the music with the almost 2-year-old toddler in her arms. Little Leia had a huge smile on her face, her cheeks rosy red from the excitement of the evening. For the first time in days, Poe felt a real smile form on his lips, and a new determination in his heart.

He would grieve this first Life Day without his father, as was expected. But by next year, his little girl would start making memories of her own, and Poe was determined to make them as good as his own memories were.

He looked at his wife, letting is smile carry over to her. She smiled back, then picked up his hand and kissed the back of it. “Happy Life Day, Poe.”

“Happy Life Day, my love.”

[freddie-77-ao3]

Emoji ask game:

🤨😉🕷️🐦‍⬛😝

First thing I notice about a person:

I don't know what the first thing I notice lol. I think it's just whatever is the most 'noticeable'. i'm pretty oblivious in general so things don;t typically stand out to me.

Favorite hobbies:

hmmm. so, you know, writing and reading are absolutely two of my biggest things-- I do primarily write fanfiction right now-- or rather, that's what I post-- but I do write essays for fun when I've got the time/energy to do a bunch of research. I think I like writing them about the same. Also, hockey of course-- luckily there are pick up games most nights in the summer, and when college starts again, so do sports. Also sports wise, running is great (when I have the energy and lung capacity+low pain, which is pretty rare). Outside of that, you know, I'll weave a little, but that's about it. sometimes I do pot holders too-- easy enough to make, and there's always someone who'll take a pot holder or two so I don't end up with 50 pot holders in my closet like I did when I was ten lol.

A phobia:

I think I only have one phobia?

Needles, I was actually perfectly fine with when I was a young kid. I didn't feel the pain, so I didn't really get the point in being afraid of them, plus I was a chronically ill kid so I was around needles for IVs and blood draws and sometime glucose monitoring a lot. anyway, that changed when I was eight.

I was in the hospital again... not actually sure what it was that time-- I think I might have fallen? anyway, whatever it was for, I needed a CT scan with contrast, and had to get an IV. but at this point I'd been in the exam room for five hours, and i'd not eaten or drank anything all day before that, so I was pretty dehydrated, you know? and so there was this nurse that like. was pretty young, probably fresh out of school and he was trying to get the IV in and.

he couldn't get it in. I was counting the pokes. he tried 36 times. I was screaming. he couldn't get it in. eventually an older nurse came in and did it but like. that was heavily traumatizing so.

Embarrassing fact about me:

other than every fact about me? my crush told me she liked me and i ran away and we never spoke about it again and we're still best friends and I still like her. that's a top tier one. might have shared that one before.

also very embarassing but the way my family's kitchen is set up I need to climb up on a chair pretty much every time I cook or I can't reach everything I need.

Favourite quote:

only one?

rats. i'm really bad at picking favourites. (seriously I almost never answer favourite questions honestly because there's so much decision making, so anyone here's a couple top ones)

"because I’m hungry and hollow and just want something to call my own. " richard siken. to me the something here is always someone.

"A meltdown feels to me like epilepsy of the emotions—all circuits firing madly, set off by a trigger just as epilepsy can be set off by flashing lights. I have as little control of it—" this is from an account of having autism from an older person and it just always resonated with me. first read it right after I had a pretty big public meltdown though, so that's probably why i got so attached to it.

"Your co-workers ask if everything’s okay and you tell them you’re just tired. And you’re trying to smile. And they’re trying to smile." Richard Siken. Just vibes, i don't know what to tell you.

[septembersghost]

chronic illness flare has turned me into a soaking wet paper doll of a person, but i have tag games to catch up on and that's a fun distraction 😊💕

tagged by jenn my sweetie @castiel

show your lock screen, last celeb photo, and last song listened to

oh this is probably going to be embarrassing. okay so my most frequently used device unfortunately doesn't have a customizable lock screen. i am very lucky to have a secondary device i use quite often these days which was a gift from a friend who didn't need it anymore, and that one had a really pretty floral/lyric from the archer for ages, but now... (if i hadn't saved this picture of taylor and benji, the lock screen and photo would've been a neat display of matched insanity, could've hit a trifecta with the song too but fob swooped in at the last second.) anyway...

♥♥♥♥

tagged by (polk! salad!) dani @valkaryah: share my top 5 songs I've been listening to.

according to my current replay playlist, and without repeating artists, otherwise this would be very skewed, it's 1. any day now - elvis presley, 2. heartbreak feels so good - fall out boy, 3. all of the girls you loved before - taylor swift, 4. look at us now (honeycomb) - daisy jones and the six, 5. all my ghosts - lizzy mcalpine (the way lizzy has not left my rotation for a year!)

♥♥♥♥

tagged by darlings @thebohemianbelle and @waxandwanewitchery: when you get this, you have to put 5 songs you actually listen to

similar to the above, but different!!! if i snagged this from that weekly replay playlist, it would essentially be all of the same artists because my listening habits have been in a cycle of comfort lately, but i'll choose five that i do listen to a lot that are also in the list and weren't represented. 1. golden - harry styles, 2. say you love me - fleetwood mac, 3. just one of those things - frank sinatra, 4. supercut - lorde, 5. easy to love - ella fitzgerald

♥♥♥♥

tagged by @bloodmoonlits 😘 my top 4 current albums (the taste on yours, i love seeing recognition for holly!) mine are going to be so predictable here please send help. (i am making an executive decision to exclude taylor from this, but red tv and lover are actually battling it out for a top spot at the moment 💖)

♥♥♥♥

tagged by @headfullofpresley and @castiel: talk about 8 shows as a way to get to know me better. this is unexpectedly hard because rarely are the shows i most dearly love ones that i would openly recommend to another human being haha 😳 so let that be a disclaimer here as i wrack my brain. in no particular order:

(1). better call saul: i will never be as deranged about anything on television as i was about this show, scheming times were had, tragedies were felt, cinnamon rolls were eaten. kisses sealed at city hall, flowers blooming in the desert. my unpopular qualms with the last few episodes/ending aside, it was such a gorgeously layered, meticulously crafted show, i loved those characters so much, it was SUCH a cinematic treat visually, and nearly every step was finely tuned and written in such a thought-provoking way. every step was perfectly acted. i could still talk about it forever. kim wexler queen of my heart, you will always be famous. you don't save me. i save me. (shout-out to the magnificent, and inarguably definitive, predecessor breaking bad.)

(2). penny dreadful: this show is a glorious horror, a mess of victoriana, a fanfiction potpourri of some of the most famous characters of literature, no sane person should invest themselves in it. unfortunately, i, not sane, love it to the bone (except for the terrible ending, you'll catch a pattern here), predominantly because vanessa ives means everything to me. the flame to which all moths gather. defiant martyr of my heart. no one will ever be like her!!! she is my fierce compassionate sickgirl heroine, fighting against the shadows of her world, her soul forever unbowed and true. even when she fears that lost, she holds close her dignity, her ability to love, her perseverance. the poetry with which the show, particularly the first two seasons, was written is unmatched. it's gothic horror in a frame that no one else on television has ever attempted, and it felt made for me when i first watched it in january of 2020. for though it is macabre and gruesome and dark and steeped in grief, it's also about beauty and devotion and resilience and connection. "i see no wildflowers here."/"then you need to look closer." and the everlasting heartbeat, no matter what john logan did to her, my vanessa. something yet remains. i remain.

(3). bates motel: fun fact, i only started bates last february, i've watched S1-4 more than once, and yet still have not finished S5. i keep trying but i don't want to do it! it's a rare one where i already know the ending is fitting, i just keep pushing it off. it's a very difficult show, it deals with heavy themes, there's triggering and horrific stuff in the pilot alone that would immediately stop me from telling people to watch (or at least give me pause), yet at the same time i think it unexpectedly becomes one of the most brilliantly done pieces of television i've ever seen. they have this audacious idea - what if we made a prequel of one of the most iconic movies of all-time? - and somehow not only pull it off, but end up making that story richer and more meaningful. we KNOW we're plummeting towards inevitable tragedy and still wish it could be diverted. we are fascinated and repulsed and aching for the bonds these people share, the desperation as they try to survive. every character is flawed in ways that the story tries to claw humanity out of, and it does something distinct in never shaming or vilifying any of the protagonists for the wretched things they do, never talking down to the audience saying we should be judging them or wishing ill on them, but rather examining WHY they are this way, why they act and react as they do, how they have been bent into these strange shapes. it exhumes your empathy and refuses to let you turn away from the difficulties of their world. the house looms forever like a breathing entity in the background. we will always end up in the basement, but how it comes to happen is the more important tale. and it has the incomparable powerhouse of norma bates, wonderful, awful, extraordinary, complicated, half queen, half little girl. she was like a miracle. as with vanessa, i will never forget her. (another pattern you'll see here: WOMEN.)

(4). remington steele: this was the very first "grown up" show i was ever allowed to watch with my mom, in syndication when i was a kid, and i just love it so much. it's such a delight. 80s glamour! mysteries and hi-jinks! THEE ultimate will-they/won't they romance, and she doesn't even know his real name! try this for a deep dark secret - the great detective remington steele? he doesn't exist. i invented him. follow - i always loved excitement, so i studied, and apprenticed, and put my name on an office, but absolutely nobody knocked down my door... i can recite the whole first season intro monologue, burned into my brain from age twelve. we just finished a rewatch a few weeks ago and i miss them already. laura holt is intelligent, beautiful, romantic, indefatigable, the closest thing the small screen has had to a classic noir inspired brassy leading lady, and was FORMATIVE for me.

(5). crazy-ex girlfriend: they put a musical on television for me. immediate hit right there. many of the numbers are parodies/homage, cheeky and clever but still heartfelt. then it became one of the funniest, most poignant, most empathetic, most memorable explorations of infatuation, self-worth, and most significantly mental health that i have ever seen. there have been a couple of other musical concept shows (smash, notably), but none that achieved what cxg did. it's an extraordinary work and sometimes i can't believe it was allowed to exist, and got to flourish the way it did. rebecca bunch could so easily be called unlikable - selfish, impulsive, obsessive - and yet she is so lovable and so real through all of her flaws, how can you not root for her, laugh with her, sing with her, cry with her? how can you not want her to get better? you find, eventually, it was never even about the guys, though they're fun to explore in all their neuroses too. they're almost...irrelevant. "a diagnosis" will never not make me weep. the show is just so important. this is about the story of a woman who learns how to recover, how to build true friendships (#gurlgroup4eva), and how to embrace herself.

(6). that girl: another one my mom brought me up on, and there are other shows i could mention here (i love lucy, the dick van dyke show, the addams family) as far as prototypes of modern comedy go (there is a direct line from that girl to the mary tyler moore show to friends and new girl), but that girl is particularly dear to me because it was influential to my mom, and because ann marie is a character all her own. she's quirky, she's determined, she's got the greatest 60s fashion, she's constantly getting herself into situations, she's one of the very first sitcom heroines to be a "single girl in the city" and to directly confront sexism (in multiple ways, but especially in the workplace and in the entertainment industry), she is loved and adored by her boyfriend (one of the best and most patient of all fictional boyfriends), but she is not defined by don, they complement each other. marlo thomas, the icon that you are.

(7). pretty little liars: listen. i know. I KNOW. it's silly, it's ridiculous, it has a host of issues, but i was hooked. and the thing is, though the mysteries fizzled and the reveals didn't make sense, what mattered were those girls. female friendship was the heart of everything in that story, they stood by each other and supported each other through every danger, toil, and snare, and even when they messed up, they forgave each other and came back together as a team every time. -A hardly matters, but the liars are everything. young volcanoes. aria, hanna, emily, and spencer all mean so much to me for very different reasons, and spencer especially. my genius, tenacious, too-caring girl. down these mean streets a girl must go who is not herself mean.

(8). supernatural: sigh. would be remiss not to mention it, right? have, in fact, written what amount to personal essays and fanciful poetics on this blog explaining at length what it once meant to me, have delved into the folklore urban legend americana of it all, and while i have gained a certain distance from it since the palpable breakdown i had from its ending that we do not acknowledge, those entries would hold true. it was so formative that things which are on this list would not be here without it, and i know that. it's so inextricable that i can't tell what is a thread connected to it in my life and what isn't at times. premiered on my birthday and presented me one of the greatest loves of my life, who i will always carry with me. i would not quite be me without dean. i would not be here right now without dean, in more ways than one. and i do my best to be brave.

(honorable mentions to shows tam and jenn had on their lists: the x-files, tvd/the originals, the marvelous mrs. maisel; other honorable mentions: btvs/a:ts, bones, dexter, fleabag S2, gilmore girls, the good place, jane the virgin, nancy drew/hardy boys mysteries, orphan black, the haunting of bly manor, select episodes of doctor who, i am quite certain i'm forgetting a bunch!)

for this last one i am tagging @nerdfaerie​, @arthurwilde, @desireearmfeldt, @someoneoffthestreet, @freakwiththeknifecollection, @bcyoureallthatmakessense, @setyourfireonme, @dewintering, @joons, @thebohemianbelle, @beckybloomwood, @takeawaythepain, and @wickedhawtwexler, but also any of you who wants to do this, or any of the rest of these, please do, and then tag me!!! i love to see them! i apologize profusely for the pervasive brainrot. 💟

[changelingsandothernonsense]

Hi it's me, friend! <3

Excuse me marching in here unannounced. I decided to send some asks, and well, I thought that perhaps you might also like these questions. (Feel free to answer in your own time or ignore as your spoons allow. <3)

I know we love to talk about breaking the rules in writing and obviously, that not every piece of advice is one-size-fits all, but there is a lot to say about being able to speak with each other about what we have learned during our journey. I was wondering if you wouldn't share. (I also plan on poking some of the others to see what more we can shake out. The more the merrier, no?)

What is the most useful/helpful pieces of advice you ever received during your formal education in relation to writing?

Once you started to write, what was the most important thing that you learned about writing or its process?

Has your real life/job had any influence on your writing? If so, how?

What advice would you give to aspiring writers (be it fanfiction or original)?

Hi Winter <3 Finally getting around to asks again :3

What is the most useful/helpful pieces of advice you ever received during your formal education in relation to writing?

I'm not formally educated in creative writing but I do write a lot of academic papers. As far as that's concerned the one thing we've been told is. "Describe the topic to me like I'm 5 and have never seen this object before."

Hey, it works! I use it for descriptions <3 2. Once you started to write, what was the most important thing that you learned about writing or its process? I'm still learning my process, really only started writing in March but I know if I'm not feeling words, I don't write. I can't make anything happen when I have transient aphasia either so maybe the most important thing is- Write when I feel the spark. Be kind to myself whilst I do it and don't worry about word count.

3. Has your real life/job had any influence on your writing? If so, how? I put a lot of personal experience into my writing (even the highly horrific stuff comes from reality for me). I have had a very wide range of experiences and a lot of those do come from my work in Archaeology. So I really love to get into interpreting the landscape in TES through that lens. I specialise in the Bronze Age Near East and Central Asia and I write a heck of a lot of Dunmer-related content (me just novelising Morrowind atm alongside the main fic which is connected directly). I use my knowledge in that to influence my characterisation of Dunmeri culture and history. I base my characterisation of Nerevar, for example on a few major historical warlords and will be doing the same for the Nerevarine. Plus I love being able to describe tombs, mummification and ruins using the background knowledge I've acquired over the last decade. Oh and I have a lot to say about Vivec! As well as the overall nature of the Tribunal, the aftermath of their fall, and how people would rebuild after the events of Tes III, IV and the Red Year. @mareenavee has been kind enough to listen to me ramble about it. I know most people don't have the patience for my opinions and analysis so it's appreciated <3 4. What advice would you give to aspiring writers (be it fanfiction or original)? Just do it! Seriously! Just write as the urge strikes you, it doesn't have to be good, that comes with time and practice. I view my writing journey the same way I view my art. It's all in practice and repetition. Oh and a lot of stubbornness! Just write!

[cosmicallyavg]

ive seen posts that talk about like.. yazs mental health after leaving the doctor and how she would handle it all. and like. yes i agree that she wouldn't handle it well, that she would probably regress a bit, because the main thing that helped her is now gone... but ultimately i think she would pull through and come out the other side? like, she would probably have a few months where she felt like she was 16 again when she wanted to get away from it all, but she has such a great support system now??? her family would look out for her more than they did the first time, she has ryan and graham and dan??? who saw her with the doctor, who saw how amazing yaz is and all of the things she's capable of (especially dan. he was with yaz when she had to take the leadership role and get them out of 1901) and??? she has the companion support group, so she knows so many others who traveled with the doctor, and they can share stories and reminisce. kate more than likely offered her a job at unit, so she has that waiting for her. she has people now who care about her and can help her through whatever tough times might come. and with the doctor, she learned that she's capable of amazing things, that she's smart and brave, that she has worth and is loved. so her growth would mean nothing if she had a bad ending.

plus, she never properly said goodbye to the doctor, so she does still have a glimmer of hope that maybe she will come back. and she has not one. but TWO holograms of her as well. that would always help her keep going too.

and yes, im aware that just because she has a good support system doesn't mean she wouldn't be depressed anymore, but i just don't think it would get to the point that it did before. i wouldn't want it to. and i understand that healing is not a straight line and there is no such thing as 100% healed. but i dont think yaz would just. give up??? some of these posts ive seen have talked about her attempting/committing and i just. really don't like that idea for her. that Yes maybe it would make for some really sad fanfiction but realistically??? i Dont want that. and if that happened it would paint the doctor in a bad light, that someone commited suicide because of them?? like it wouldn't be her fault because she didn't know yaz had those issues, it's not like the doctor did any of the things she did for malicious reasons, she pushed yaz away because she thought it would be less painful. but if anything like that happened it would just feel icky. and then if the doctor ever found out, it would be detrimental to their own mental health. they have enough problems we really don't need to add to it.

i just want yaz to move on and be happy with the things she gained from the doctor, not sad about what she lost. she has So many friends and a family who loves her. and somewhere out there, there's an alien who loves her too. she deserves to be happy.

[27-royal-teas]

🧃🕯️🔪

hi Lily!!!!! <33

🧃 : share some personal, never before-heard lore!

hmm. tbh im pretty open book on this blog. ive probably shared way more than is safe for me to share and I definitely should tone it down. I think in this question they want you to show some dark secret but I dont have any of those because im bad at keeping secrets. anyway last year my best friend and I went to three different concerts together : the head and the heart, fall out boy, and all time low. it was the best time of my life. at all time low they played our song and i almost took a shot in the dark and kissed her but instead i continued to be a coward and didn’t do anything and then she sends me texts analyzing the way i walk and then ghosts me for weeks. anyway i also like adeles music a lot, rumor has it fucks hard

🕯️: on a scale of 1-10, how much do you enjoy editing + why?

8? It’s fine. usually i edit as i go. I reread my stuff pretty frequently when im in the process of writing it but sometimes it can get to the point where I over edit and then i dont like it anymore. It’s why i really need a beta but there’s no way im telling my best friend i write middle aged band men rpf. i dont personally mind editing its just sometimes i get sick of looking at my own writing 

🔪: weirdest topic researched for a writing project? 

I used to write a lot of umbrella academy fanfiction specifically five-centric angst (he’s my favorite guy, of course i had to torture him). of course, this resulted in me searching fun stuff on my school computer like ‘how long does it take for someone to die of electrocution’ and ‘can someone live from a bullet to the chest’ and ‘how much blood is in the human body’. you know, fun things like that. i also had to search up the year pete wentz got divorced for a recent wip which made me feel like a major stalker 

[ging-pegger]

hey guys! a bit of a different post than usual... but please bear with me here ♥︎

i understand it may have been discouraging for my blog to have remained a bit inactive for a lengthy period of time; and to be totally transparent, it was due to personal life experiences i was going through. i am so happy to have people still here and excited for what i post, it is genuinely so reassuring.

i experienced a completely devastating loss in april of 2023, which left me a complete mess. i am still to this day facing difficulties with the grieving process, but things are getting better. additionally, as ive shared with ygs before i do struggle with my mental health, which was also a big factor in my lengthy hiatus. I've been bringing myself back to this blog, back to you guys and back to hxh and I'm trying to enjoy life again. and im happy to say it has honestly helped so much to have this support system when i returned.

i apologize for how long it has taken me to get back to writing. and i want to say thank you to everyone who stuck around here.

with this being said, i really want to boost engagement, and I'm really curious as to what i can do that will draw in interactions, and make you guys happy! i try to be very open and as interactive as possible; but lately I've noticed that my blog feels as though its going downhill in comparison to what it once was.

I don't really know whats to blame for the lack of interest, and I'm not really trying to get down to its root cause or anything, however it's just been very discouraging lately.

i say in complete honesty that i get so excited when my mutuals and followers reach out for any reason, i love having a platform that allows me to have one on one discussions with you guys. which is why i opt to post on tumblr rather than any other fanfiction site.

please utilize reblogs, dms, the ask box, and comments to reach out to me if you are interested! share your thoughts, ideas, opinions, art etc. i want to hear from you guys. you are all very important to me. because without you i would have no one to share my creativity with! you all give me a creative outlet and incredible support and love that i will always be thankful for, because you have never ever put me down for the writing i produce, and in recent times my art.

i really hope to hear from you guys soon, like i said feel free to reach out in any way you feel comfortable with 🫶 stay safe

[pool-floatie]

I feel the need to share my g/t experience with erryone since its been on my mind for a while and I find it interesting how early on It showed up.

Ever since I was a little kid, probably 5-7 years old, I had little daydreams occasionally about giants taking me to their houses or a park or wherever and they would tease me and have fun with me, I was always scared of course because apparently ive always liked this fearplay bullshit, but i still found it exhillirating and fun. Of course it wasnt romantic or anything until I got older, just,,, like a really tall roller coaster, scary but exciting.

When I started reading, i found one of the borrowers books, i think my mom actually got it for me (maybe i had mentioned the daydreams??) ! I think it was The littles and The Biggs families, but yeah. I loved it and i tried to find more but they werent at my school library 😭 so Iworked with what I had, a book and a dream. (lol cringe-)

While i was in 4th- 6th grade I had kind of repressed it, I still thought about it on occasion but i started to realise that nobody else had that interest and it was just a wierd thing with me... Until I watched the BFG (cliche right 🙄) it was when the movie came out and people were talking about it! For a while it held the title of my favorite movie just so I could talk about it when people asked that particular icebreaker.

One night in like... 7th grade I had a dream that i was at church (lol cringefail imagine being religious...) and I picked up a piece of paper inviting people to come test out an experiment... Then i saw a flash And somewhere from the depths of my memories, my brain pulled out one of my old daydream scenarios.

I was in a laboratory with several other humans and we were all in a big glass box. Surrounding us were giants who took us out of the container and gave us baths, undressing us and scrubbing us down with toothbrushes so we would be clean for the examination.

I was taken away to a desk and meticulously examined from head to toe, the giant tried to probe me with questions but I was too shocked to speak.

Thats all I can remember but I was so fascinated by the dream that I started telling my family about it, now of course nobody wanted to hear me talk about my dream for 20 minutes, so my mom encouraged me to write it down.

And oh hell did I write.

My first long form writing stemmed from a dream I had, i wrote for months, of course, I was 13 do it was flaming garbage but I was so happy about it and thought it was a masterpiece.

So naturally as anyone would, I emailed it to my english teacher.

She never responded.

I wonder why.

To this day I pray that she never opened it, her emails being too cluttered with important school things that it got lost and never crossed her eyes.

But still, it was through this little writing that I began to realise my potential (lol cringe origin story-)

I still have the draft of the story, its plot and characters were a good foundation, and perhaps one day i will look it over, change a few things, get cancer and die.

During quarantine I discovered Sanders Sides, which led me down a fanfiction rabbit hole, which led me to tumblr, which led me to a creator called delimeful , not sure if they want to be tagged in this so I wont... They wrote some marvelous G/t Sanders sides fanfic and i soon realised... This is a community, it wasnt just them.. There was, so /much/ so many artists and writers that shared this niche interest, a community of people who g e t i t .

It started slow, I continued interacting with the tumblr community ( hell, the husk of my old blog might still roam this site (|||O⌓O;) )

Only ever looking for safe, wholesome g/t.

But where was the stomach-dropping exhilliration I had felt before, that rollercoaster feeling? What was missing??

I needed the fearplay, and in looking for it i stumbled into vore and that dynamic, playing with pred/prey and even more teasing. I was hesitant at first.

But lo and behold that was the gawd damn ticket. I started to write again, finding new stories and creators and tropes galore! I learned about the community, the terms and the subgenres!

Finally I gained confidence in my writing ability through a class that helped me grow my skills and practice.

And I eventually decided i could share all my hard work. All this time I had spent worrying if i should just keep it to myself, but i reminded myself of all the non beta read and unfinished work i had seen, and looking back at my own I was less afraid, people still liked it even then... So what could they say about mine ?

There ya go, thats my,, I guess life story told through the g/t Timeline.

Hopefully I was vague enough to not give away any behind the scenes, yall will never know who I am 😈😈😈

Also im not trying to bash any creators, I appreciate everyone who contributes to the community with anything they have.

[the-sappho-of-lesbos]

I know this is all very new to me, that one someone who gets in my head and doubts things a lot and also that everyone’s experiences are different. So I could very easily change my mind on this.

But I feel like media as a whole , at least the stuff I’ve consumed , has always done the best job of highlighting just how much a relationship really is just like a best friendship.

I know before I ever properly had one I just viewed it as this separate thing. I still wanted who I dated to be my best friend, but I guess I never knew what that would feel like. I think it’s also just brought to life how I’m not very good in the friend department lol.

I get in my head a lot about this stuff. I keep thinking oh no am I not feeling what I’m supposed to feel. Should it be more of this and less of that. Should I be doing this instead. Am I moving too slow. Am I moving too fast. It’s easy to give myself all those questions since we don’t live near each other either. The slip to feeling self conscious when someone is just on a screen is very quick I think. But I look back to all the times irl and it’s just nice. Plain and simple nice. I don’t even really worry about it all that much in the moment because I genuinely just feel like I’m hanging out with my best friend. We link arms and kiss and have sex and all that, and I enjoy it and find her desirable in that way, but more then anything I really do wholeheartedly feel like I’m just having a fun time with my friend.

I guess since my scaffolding for relationships while growing up has been from fiction or dysfunctional heterosexual relationships I was going in a bit blind. Growing up it was like you had your partner and you had your friends. They were completely seperate in what they offered you. And romance books / fanfiction very heavily dive into the hard hitting emotions and glorification of finding a piece of yourself somewhere else.

Ive found for myself it’s nothing like that. I thought it was once, when I was with my. But also I wasn’t with her for very long and she was my first girlfriend. My first time being gay in person. Of experiencing certain things I’d only read about. I didn’t get enough time with her to get to this point.

And it’s still VERY early days. So I know I have a long way to go in understanding myself and my feelings and what they mean. And I know I’ll still have days where I get insecure and overanalyse stuff , to try and put myself into the boxes the world have put around me, get frustrated at myself for not doing things the way I feel like I need to. But I also know I just feel nice. To some nice might be too low of a word. Too small. Not grand enough. Not filled with enough love. However a lot of my bad emotions are overwhelming strong and exhausting. Even good ones sometimes have been really strong to the point where the drop really hurts.

I like something being nice. I like it being slow. Being nice fills like calm seas after years of rough ones. I also know it’s probably because I’m just stupidly mentally ill and depressed, so I might never feel that true rush of long term happiness I want to. But this is still really good. I might not have a bright sun and rainbows over my little boat. But it’s calm and stopped raining. I can look around a bit and share it with my best friend.

That type of nice seems really good to me. It’s comforting. It’s not what I had built in my head a romantic relationship necessarily was, but I think I like the reality more. At least when I’m not feeling insecure over it and comparing myself to either fictional and or heterosexual standards.

[br1ghtestlight]

i know you didn’t rb it, but i wanted to send you some fanfic writer asks anyway (if you want to do them!!) how about - 3, 4, 18, 19? 💖

AWWW this is so sweet thank you!! of course!!! <3

3. what’s your favorite fic that you’ve written?

i feel like it would be a lie to say anything other than my genderfluid gene fanfiction just bcuz i spent a ridiculous amount of time on it and still reread it somewhat frequently lol but other than that im also proud of the fanfiction i wrote abt bob's mom and her death :) very interesting themes to explore and i liked writing the childhood flashbacks

4. how many wips do you have right now?

there are so many i couldn't even count them all probably at least 30+ but for fanfictions im actively working on or TRYING to work on uhh maybe like 5 or 6 depends on the day. always starting new ideas

18. what’s one of your favorite lines you’ve written in a fic?

i definitely dont remember every line of dialogue ive ever written so i might be forgetting something but i really like linda talking to louise abt consent as a toddler ("Louise, I promise that we will NEVER try to steal your bunny ears, or tell you to take them off and not give them back to you afterwards. Not ever. We know that you love your bunny ears, and I made 'em special for you. Even if you're the baddest, meanest girl in the whole world, those bunny ears belong to you. They'll always be yours. Nobody is ever allowed to take them off without your permission, except for you. Not even Mommy or Daddy is allowed to do that.") and tina telling zeke that she'll always be there for him ("I'll be here for you no matter how scary it gets," Tina whispered.)

19. give us a small teaser from one of your wips

not sure if this counts as small but it doesn't make sense without the full context i dont think?? not even sure if im ever going to finish this one but its cute. it isnt from my tina x jimmy jr childhood friends to lovers fanfic btw this is just a silly sleepover fic i was writing

Jimmy Junior looked at Tina as she talked. She was wearing purple horse pajamas and he thought that they looked cool. "Do you want me to paint your nails?"

He had to have zoned out of their conversation, because he had no idea what was going on but Zeke was looking at Tina like everything she was saying made perfect sense. He had a goofy smile.

"Hell yeah! I want you use black for mine, and give 'em red and orange flames comin' off my fingers. That'll look cool as hell."

"What about you, Jimmy Junior?" Tina asked.

Tina was never cruel to him. She'd never teased him for his lisp or said that his dancing was stupid and annoying, even when they were fighting and she had every reason to be insulting to him. He wasn't always an amazing friend to her and he hadn't said enough how much he appreciated that she'd been there for him since preschool. They'd grown up together. Tina had been around when his younger brothers were born, and when his parents got their divorce finalized and he couldn't stop crying during school. They'd played together on the playground and shared their first kiss at her thirteenth birthday party, and through everything Jimmy Junior always knew that Tina loved him and had a good heart. Better than his.

He still couldn't help but pause for a second and try to figure out if she was trying to embarrass him or make a mockery of him somehow. Nobody had ever asked to paint his nails before, and he'd honestly considered makeup something that was completely forbidden. It was condemned only to his mother's bathroom cabinet and taken out when she was going on a date with somebody she wanted to impress. He wasn't ALLOWED to wear makeup.