#ive had such a day in general. whatever tho <3< /div>
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telesodalite · 2 months ago
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I need to be weirder about the scavengers and cannibalism...
#its been a long day... but im feeling better now. (thanks for the well wishes and such btw <3-)#(-sending my well wishes in return by tenfold bcs. damn. it seems stuff is really going around rn)#but yeah... just. augh. theres just smth about how the scavs sorta translate into more like. thriller-esque genres pretty well?#like. i feel somehow those themes compliment their characteristics? or could compliment their characteristics in a more rounded out way#sure. theyre generally a light hearted romp of absurdity with occasional themes of a not good not bad handling of 'mental health matters'#but they just really shine a bit in horrific circumstances. esp with the sort of absurdity they bring to the table#theyre odd people. even in the context of their generally weird and alien universe. and that right there feels like a trove of potential#its like. ok. the lost light crew? also odd. but thats a huge ship. full of people and variety and a sense of purpose and normalcy post-war#(normalcy being. whatever all those background folks were getting up too while plot happened around them. cruise ship stuff ig)#but in contrast. with the w.a.p crew. its an ark class ship with like. a handful of people. and a whole lot of junk and free time#both just cruising through space endlessly for years. one with hundreds of people. and one with like 6 people.#so both are technically isolated when theyre not making pit-stops planet or station side. but again. 100s vs 6 dudes.#think. top of the line cruise ship from hell with a small town sized populace vs a big shitty boat and 6 starving guys#both have the capacity to become case studies in madness. both could do really well thriller wise. but the scavs being a smaller group?#it only being the 6 of them emphasis the isolation perhaps. less variety. less change. same 6 people for 5(?) years#things could get weird fast. codependent mentalities. us vs them mindsets. an otherness about everyone else outside of their group#and then! then you add to the mix the fact that theyre eating/drinking from corpses?! *chefs kiss* awesome. love it.#non-stationary isolation + cannibalism. ough. perfect mix. a classic of maritime horror but in space! :D!#a big ship. small crew. living while knowing that as soon as you kick the bucket. your body is the meal. your body is the fuel.#no decorum about it. no faith. no belief. just perverse survival. bcs they might enjoy it. a bloody gluttony. with a bite. a sample. a taste#it takes seeing your buddy as a walking talking burger to another level. bcs every corpse you come across is also a burger. and a gas can#also fulcrum making candy out of corpses is so. particularly perfect when it comes to the horrifically absurd. just. smth about it. idk#but also also. the line. where was the line drawn for each of them? and when did they each cross it?#most of them dont seem like the type to jump head first into that. so how did they justify it to themselves? had they done it before?#and then. when did it become normal? a habit? smth enjoyable?#i might be running out of tags. but yeah. them being weirder. esp about each other and others.#nothing brings a group of people together like the overhanging knowledge that you sort of kinda wanna eat each other#(rlly wishing i could stomach realistic thrillers rn. but i just cant. gotta stick to written or artistic styles or risk panic attacks :/)#(ive tried a couple movies and shows now. and cant get through most of them. praise be synopses and peoples long rambles about them tho :D)#(nothing like reading someones passionate ramble about the meaning/symbolism of some gory nightmare without having to actually see it lol)
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the-red-hoodlum · 2 months ago
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killing people who don’t get an animals consent before touching them &/or ignore when animals are visibly uncomfortable with being touched.
#MOTHERS FRIEND DOING THIS WITH OUR CAT RN IM PISSED.#SHE DIDNT EVEN GIVE TOFU ANY TIME TO SNIFF OR ANYTHING??#Sigh.#tofu came downstairs to see what was up bc person was in the house#But person just immediately started petting her#even tho tofu was visibly uncomfortable and clearly just wanted a sniff test or sm#went to my room asap after that and tofu followed quick on my heels#obvs I let her sniff as much as she wants before petting her (if she even wants fuss) so she had a sniff and very much seemed to want fuss#so I gave her a few strokes and then sorta checked in and she swirled around and bumped her head into my hand (all the while her tail was#pointed straight up with the tip quivering a little every few moments - a sign of happiness/excitement to see a familiar person)#so we had cuddles for a bit until she hopped off my chest to go get water or sm :3#BUT I DONT GET WHY MORE PEOPLE DONT HAVE SIMPLE WHOLESOME INTERACTION WITH THEIR CAT LIKE THIS??#LIKE. CATS ARE SENTIENT. THEY SEEK AUTONOMY - ESPECIALLY BODILY AUTONOMY. WHY TF WOULD YOU NOT LET THEM GIVE/DENY CONSENT??#like. if you aren’t willing to learn enough about an animal to understand when it’s unhappy at the very least *why* would you interact with#one?? (This person literally has a cat as well.)#idk man these are the same sorts of people that’d probably do the ‘awww just give me a hug! I’m your auntie(/whatever)! why can’t i have a#hug? 🥺’ sorta thing.. like. BRO. It isn’t my/the cat ‘s fucking job to regulate/look after your own grown ass feelings.#SIGH..#just. The fact this person has like.. met tofu once. Lived in the same house as her for maybe 4/5 days one time and thinks the cat is#obligated to put up with her or whatever.#(This is how I imagine people be acting around cats when they’re like ‘idk man cats just don’t like me! Cats are just independent by nature#I’m just stood there having to listen to them shit talk a whole species bc they don’t understand consent (or at least don’t universally#value it - eg; with children; with animals) ANYWAYS. CATS ARE A SOCIAL SPECIES WHO HAVE DEVELOPED TO LIVE CLOSELY WITH AND DEPEND ON HUMANS#THEYRE OFTEN VERY AFFECTIONATE AND LOVING AND FORM LASTING RELATIONSHIPS WITH THEIR HUMANS AND WILL MOURN THEIR DEATH PROBABLY MORE THAN#HALF OF THE HUMANS WHO ATTENDED THEIR FUNERAL.)#If tofu doesn’t like you I don’t like you mate. I am wholeheartedly willing to cut people off if they act wrong with my cat - like - BRO.#IVE KNOWN HER LONGER THAN I HAVE MOST OTHER PPL IN MY LIFE. SHES GOT ME THROUGH WORSE AND IS ALWAYS HAPPY N EXCITED TO SEE ME.#That cat has done more for me than you ever have! She loves me with her whole fucking soul and I her with mine. If she picks up the wrong#vibes from you/you break any of her clearly set boundaries we are DONE.#(Obvs /nbh - nobody here. & generally lighthearted but uhh yeah needed to rant abt this bc I care strongly abt it and other ppl should too)
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arolesbianism · 5 months ago
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Thinking abt my nuggets again. Explodes them.
#rat rambles#oc posting#in particular Im thinking abt my girl ding shes my best friend#I actually have been thinking abt giving her a funky design if I do eventually draw her but I am facing one key issue#she has like. no ego gifts.#which is sad! I wanna play around with ego gifts more! most of my main guys have boring gifts!#I could just pick her out some but that feels like cheating I wanna work with what I get y'know?#but I dont have her working on anything so she'll probably never get any naturally#so alternatively I could do some like. number generator scenanigans to chose like 3 random gifts to give her#that way I dont get to chose and am forced to work with what I get#which Ill probably do but Ill have to blacklist a few gifts (mainly the eye covering ones since thats an important part of her design)#I might also do this with some of my other gift lacking guys that might help rhem gain some favor with me#Im quite attached to most of my older nuggets but theres only like 3 or 4 of my newer ones Ive been able to click with#and by newer I mean from like the middle of my second runthrough (Im currently on first day reset number 4)#so thats not a good sign for any of them#well tbf a decent chunk of the newest ones are from the last run through so those guys genuinely are quite new#anyways maybe giving them somw gifts will give me more inspiration to actually think of stuff for them#the siblings are the only ones that I have any attachment to right now of the last two batches and ema is lucky to be one I like#and my girl ding earned her position in this corporation so Im obligated to adore her#for context she was one of various nuggets I made to sacrifice to grind out tool abnormality info#but she somehow managed to survive one that I fully expected her to die to so she gets to stay#one of the other ones also got to stay but thats just because I had enough info for we can change anything already#and by stay I mean sit in storage for the rest of time because I think it's funny#he was my guy for whatever the hell the weapon upgrading one is called#for the non leathal ones I just had most of them finish the research and then go to we can cange everything#but he lucked out and got to live#the others didnt tho so rip to them#at least my tool grind is officially complete and I dont have to worry abt it anymore#I also am in general really close to being done with my abno info hunt#I even defeated apocalypse bird a lil while ago so I basically only have white knight to worry abt now
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liinos · 1 year ago
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Gonna be real yall I think the vets office is a tad traumatizing for me 👍
#had one of the most emotionally taxing and exhausting days in a while#im petsitting for my neighbor and i ended up having to take his dog to the emergency vet and was there for 8 hours#during which many Many people came to pick up ashes and that coupled with the fact that the last time we went to the emergency vet. you know#made it genuinely so hard to be there like on top of the fact that i knew it wasnt going to be great news#and then having to be the one to take the news that the dog has cancer which is obviously not a great prognosis... really rough day#and like having to see a lot of people coming in to put down their pets it was really really rough#and i feel really guilty even tho i know its not my fault the dog is sick and i couldnt have done anything#but like their cat went into kidney failure like right after they got back from their last trip when i was watching them#so it feels like im a harbinger of doom atp 🥴#and i am and have been really frustrated that theyve been going on so many trips exactly because#i was afraid of something like this happening like you have a senior dog and you KNOW goldens are prone to health issues#their last dog literally died bc of undetected cancer while they were on a trip#and this guy has been generally really healthy and was acting perfectly fine until last night#but still hes old and its just so unfair to him that theyve been traveling so much#i think total over this year ive watched him for roughly 3 months and like. i personally think that if you have a dog#you dont just get to do whatever like you have a duty to your dog but especially to older dogs
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needlefail · 7 days ago
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COTC WEEK 2025 DAY 4: FAMILY
WITH DAVID, KELSEY, KIRI (oc), ROGER (+ The champions kinda,, theyre mentioned)
Late as SHITTTTT For this but Ive been tired </3 Also yes this is entry Oc centric I dont CAREEEE HE HAS ALOT OF LITTLE FAMILY DYNAMICS AND I WANTED TO DRAW THEM
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Anywayssssssss we all know how much I love the Big Brother Elders hc especially with David and Kelsey so you KNOWWWWW I had to draw them
EVERYTIME THESE GUYS ARE IN THE SAME EPISODE TOGETHER THEYRE ALWAYS DOINGGGG SOMETHING Like David’s nicknames for Kelsey, the little getting sworn in scene in Dibs Court etc etc ITS SO CUTEEE
Idk Kelsey’s 0 to 100 attitude and David’s general “:D?” is super funny to me, you know this girl would drag him into shit before he can even blink and then he’d have no power in getting them out of it (Knowing David he’d make it worse actually)
You could clearly tell Kelsey really looked up to the Elders at the start of the show, and she doesn’t have any siblings or many figures in her life for guidance beside her dad, so idk I could definitely see her looking up to them in not just a role model or “wow wise wizard” way like the other kids in the creek, but probably in a more big brother way. Especially with the way older siblings are sometimes portrayed in media she’d probably think this is what having older siblings is like.
Then as the show goes on she stops,,, not looking up to them but more so just figuring out “man,, these are just some guys” and then from there being like “SIGGGGHHH These guys” WHICH IDK ITS STILL SIBLING CORE TO ME THE ELDERS ARE SPECIALLY HER BIG BROTHERS OKAY
Anywayssssss then theres the two of them with Kiri :333
I know I dont talk about him much so bare with me here
Kiri lives in a little cave in the creek and often scavenges around it for whatever he needs but most of the time he raids the Elders’ snack stash in Elder Rock most of the time
ON TOP OF THAY HE JUST,, hangs in Elder Rock alot when everyone’s gone home after the Dinner Horn. Sorta like a little sibling going in your room when youre not home if that makes sense
Aside from stealing, sometimes the Elders just allow him to burrow or have old things they dont need so he has a small collection of old vhs tapes and a gameboy (From david) SORTA LIKE HAND ME DOWNS IF THAT MAKES SENSE And also David hands him his helmet from time to time when he isnt using it which Kiri likes alot because loreeeee reasonnsssss
David also trims Kiri’s hair so its not,, too bad and you know I had to do this cause
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Yadda Yadda, older brother who checks up on his wilderness younger brother and gives him things or sits by him to help him with a level or WHATEVER SEE MY VISION HERE THEYRE CUTEEEEE
KELSEY AND KIRI IS SORTA SIMILAR TO HER AND DAVID TOO, Along the lines of She gets into shit and drags him into it and she sorta looks up to him because she relates to him on a few levels and it fills in a role that she hasn’t had before
Also despite him being older than her by a few years (7 to be exact), HE goes to HER when he’s scared and he looks so STUPIDDDDDD
BECAUSE DESPITE LIVING IN THE CREEK HES SCARED OF THE DARK So often times he’ll have stories of beasts and monsters he SWEARS UP AND DOWN HE SAW And knowing Kelsey you know she’ll wanna go after them so she has to drag the big baby with her
Think like how her and Gibson were in Creature Feature, thats Kelsey and Kiri
IDK THESE THREE TOGETHER ARE LIKE THREE NERDS BUT THE YOUNGEST IS BOSSING THE OTHER TWO AROUND and having to fight their battles because they cower behind her
theyre cute okay
Aside from the Elders tho, Kiri’s main group of little family is the Champions
THEYRE ALL HIS LITTLE SIBLINGS AND HES THE OLDER BROTHER THEY ALL THROW AROUND LIKE A RAG DOLL (especially because hes smaller than 3/4 of them)
Theyre all always bickering and tussling and roughhousing, before they all go in a huge pile to take a nap from how tired they are from fighting, before shortly being woken up and beginning to tussle all over again
Theyre just a bunch of kids who play rough and in ways that ward off other kids, no matter how much they bicker tho they have each other’s bavks and always stick together and ORUGHHH THEY HAVE MY WHOLE HEART AND THEY ALL MAKE ME CRYYY
Unfortunately I dont have any art rn of them that I can post so enjoy this old repost of a doodle of Keun and Kiri
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They are like Luffy and Ace to me
AND THEN A LITTLE BONUS
KIRI + ROGER :33333
THEY BOTH LIVE IN THE CREEK YOU KNOWWWWWW I HAD TO MAKE THEM BUDDIES
KIRIS THE ONLY ONE WHO GETS ROGER’S WEIRDNESS, Where the other kids will get freaked out and put off Kiri’s just “Thats nice Roger 😊” and more or less letting him do his own thing
Except when he drinks creek water, not even Kiri does that
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Kiri also lets Roger into his cave during colder seasons or rough weather as well
KKKKKK RAMBLE OVER :333 *runs away in embarrassment*
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nadianova · 6 months ago
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How much time do you spend planning some of your visual novels? At least going by some of them being jam submissions, it feels like you go from pre-production to a finished build very quickly, and it's amazing how you can manage that while still having an awesome story and so many assets.
Also, what is like, the process of planning a story out for you, if there's any vague or concrete similarities that you've noticed?
i think the important context here is that if i get bored/have nothing to do i jhust immediately get really suicidal its like ridiculous how bad it gets(ITS FINE DONT WORRY ABOUT IT IVE HAD 5 YEARS OF THERAPY). so i hate being bored and want to occupy my time wit something fun whatever that is. if i have a project to focus on but especially if I'm working for a game jam i have a deadline and i just decide to myself okay i will release a game now.
because ive made a decent amount of games i roughly have an idea on my capabilities, i can estimate how long it takes for me to write a story so and so long and how long it takes for me to draw stuff i need and how long it takes for me to throw stuff in renpy. these are estimates like as in I'm not accurate with it but still enough that i generally know where to start cutting ideas since the most important part is just having something to submit. i also know to plan around my brain wanting to slam my head into a wall an my hands suddenly giving up on being able to draw.
i think thats the beauty of game jams it forces you to just go for it and release something. releasing a 'bad' game is better than no game at all. experience only comes over time and i think just going for it is the best approach there is. like its literally 2 weeks 1 month whatever of your life. if you have the time and motivation go for it. make it work or fuck it up it wont matter in the grand scheme of things
im not sure what is the motivation behind the question but i do want to point out that this is just my method (if you can even call it a method) and the only way to figure out what works for you is to just try until you find something that actually works for you
idk not everyone will find it doable/fun to plan around spending two weeks gamedev 10 hours a day just cause i wanted to fit in 100 cgs for a jam game but apparently i can do that when i cheat my stupid adhd brain into hyperfocus with adhd meds
READMORE BECAUSE I CANT STOP RAMBLING
as for planning tho i think ideas on their own are worthless and its always about execution in the end. a great idea or a meh idea are the same for me but i do still enjoy the planning process so i keep notes
like i see a great tumblr post or i see some art or visual novel has some scene that inspires me: i save that shit for myself
having a big collection of random floating ideas like that helps me easily pick from especially during a jam type duration. right now i have like 4-5 half-baked project skeletons, some are literally like 3 pictures and some like naomida are a hundred hours worth of me writing world building about how the toilets work in a city with no plumbing cause its -30celcius(i love bringing this up)=
i dont normally plan that much, i tend to just wing it. like for malmaid i seriously just had some rough ideas and just went along as i wrote
same thing for dddeviance i had a handful of scenes that i really wanted to make and knew what kind of start and end it was meant to have and just figured out how to fill the in between. a lot of plot points changed vastly like halfway through i realised my devil + angel combination was stupid and i should just go for fallen angel + angel.
i think there really is no simple answer tho (as evident from the long as hell post) i don't really have a 'process' because every single game has been worked on has come with different type of planning since I'm always trying new stuff to try and distract me from boredom. like I've been using obsidian for naomida while previously I've just used a empty discord serve as my notes app for malmaid and dddeviance
and tbh with naomida I'm running to a new problem where I'm definitely planning too much. like I'm spending too much time fidgeting with details in chapter 4 even when i haven't finished writing chapter 1 just cause its so easy to get in the loop of "oh ill just change this one line" and boom 20 mins spent playing with my notes that didn't really progress my game since by the time i reach this point the whole scene might have shifted to something else
.
but if i had to squeeze an answer itd be something like everything related to my art or writing or games is just like "oooooo that seems fun i should remember this for later" and then i just string 10-100 of those into a story
i tend to write my stories in a format of
character A does this and that
this happens here
puppy play ryona piss orgasm
new day and then this happens here
sad thing happens
more piss orgasm
the end
and just like start filling in more details and working on my story in a nonlinear fashion until i feel like i have a strong enough skeleton that i can start writing my scenes. i hop around a lot, often preferring to write the fun scenes first like ero stuff or the ones I'm the most interested in and then the rest is just filling the blanks and stringing the cool scenes together
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suffarustuffaru · 9 months ago
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Scrolling through your blog is such a fun experience, you bring an absolutely great vibe to this fandom and I love it SO MUCH. Could even say you restored my hope in it, since there has been some aspects that made me force myself to leave it, and I hope me bringing one of them up here won't upset anyone.
Now I completely understand if you wish to not answer my ask, but I figured it's worth a shot. So, one of said aspects was a controversy regarding one of the rezero characters that made me feel like you can't mention them without being called names (mostly on tiktok, but other social media also, tho not as much).
Yeah I'm talking about Felix. I'm not transphobic by any means, and I'm fine with people headcannoning whatever they want, but seeing thousands of people calling others transphobic for calling Felix a 'he' made me so unsafe I forced myself to look for other interest. Which is funny since most of the people saying this weren't even part of the fandom. I was wondering if anyone else here had similar situations and just.. how do you deal with it? It seems silly, I know, but feeling like I can't speak about a rather important character from a media I love made me so upset.
No matter how much I tried explaining it, they either dismiss it or say Tappei made him a trans girl without knowing.
Now, if you do decide to answer this and say that Felix indeed may have been 'trans coded' a little bit (Did I used that term correcly? Idk) I'll understand (hell, I would probably agree, you character analysis are great), I'm just upset at the absolute lack of respect for any other way of referring to Felix other then she/her.
(Also in case people don't know, their proof of Felix being a trans girl is the scene from EX1, with the whole calling himself a girl in front of a mirror thing)
Sorry for this is being long and probably messy I just had to get this off my chest.. also I hope I didn't came of as offensive in any way, if I did I'm really sorry.
hi there anon! first of all - aw thank you for your compliments about me and my blog. im super passionate about rezero (though thats probably super clear to anyone whos seen any content i make for a while aljsdlkf) and well. ive been lurking about in this fandom since summer 2020 so i definitely understand having to leave/distance yourself from this fandom because outside of tumblr, the rezero fandom is kind of . well. to put it simply, theres a lot of metaphorical landmines unfortunately!! T^T and admittedly i wouldve left this fandom a lot sooner if i didnt stick to my own corner and curate spaces with other people who were super chill (like lots of people lurking about here on tumblr + rz tumblr in general!!). so i totally understand how you feel anon (and youre not silly for being upset, i promise!), though admittedly im not super super familiar with some rezero spaces (such as rz twitter) bc i 1. dont speak japanese and 2. i try very hard to avoid the negativity whenever possible!! T^T
and also i apologize for taking a while to answer your ask!! you're one of my older asks that kinda got lost in my drafts hah but i also just wanted to like. take extra care with your ask bc its a super important topic. like not just to me (though its definitely important to me) but its important in general. and i really like felix so. <3
a quick disclaimer is that i myself am not transfem. i am however afab and most likely genderqueer!! (im winging it as i go hah.) felix is also not a character id say im as well-versed in yet, but i do like felix a lot and ex1 changed my entire brain chemistry. and ill also be defaulting to he/him pronouns in this post because thats what he uses in canon.
felix is - at the end of the day - a fictional character, and tappei is a cis man who doesnt Entirely write characters like felix through a queer lens. arguably tappei is Self-Aware when he writes characters who are into other characters of the same sex (though the Representation is arguably a little bit questionable at times depending on how you look at it), but when it comes to characters like felix or subaru who have some Gender Stuff going on, it's more nebulous there. i dont know if tappei 100% realizes he's made characters that could be read as Trans/Genderqueer (emphasis on "read as", because i support different interpretations of these characters), but tappei Definitely Is Very Aware that gender and gender presentation and gender roles are super important when it comes to characters like felix, subaru, and crusch.
i think tappeis own perceptions of gender and gender roles do bleed a bit into the text as much as tappei is pretty purposeful with themes surrounding gender in rezero, but rezero itself still has all sorts of identity issues to explore with a lot of its characters and gender is a big part of that!!
so first and foremost im gonna be examining felix the best i can Purely Off Of The Canon Text, though i do like viewing rezero from a queer lens myself (and it is arguably very queer). im gonna talk first about felix and then ill move onto talking about my personal feelings on rezero fandom stuff :o !!
so felix's relationship with his gender is complicated and he Absolutely does not fit into traditional gender roles or gender presentation right now. these are undeniable. and if people headcanon felix as transfem thats totally understandable and valid!! but to say a headcanon is 100% canon and that other interpretations of a character as complex as felix are invalid isnt exactly it. for sure. i mean i myself interpret him as nonbinary haah. but felix's relationship with gender is so so so So complicated that i dont think you could just say hes transfem and then Not Elaborate More.
but regardless of how Exactly you label felix, i think you could possibly say that hes trans coded. tappei, even if he probably doesnt entirely know hes made pretty genderqueer characters, is Aware and Purposeful of how gender affects felix and his perception of himself and his identity and other peoples perception of him and this is brought up Over and Over Again in canon—felix’s gender identity, at the moment, aligns more with femininity in his presentation in every way, though he still perceives himself as masculine. felix’s case is complicated, and while im not entirely sure on this i think you could argue that hes trans coded—“coding” suggests a level of intent when making these characters, and i think that intent is present in some way with tappei. because tappei Knows just how important gender is with felix’s character and you can tell with how often and how Integral it is to felix’s entire character.
(more under the cut) (i do have a habit of being rambley/wordy sometimes if. if you couldnt tell already. but i hope this response is up to your standards!!)
these three analysis posts on felix's relationship with gender have all discussed this topic in-depth before i have, and i 1. really like the rezero content i see from all three of these people and 2. they All have slightly different takes based on the canon we have but also some similar points. because felix is complicated!! of course our takes are probably gonna be a bit different - he's a multifaceted character with such a complex relationship with his gender that it's hard to tell what every single one of his personal feelings on it is (especially when at the moment he hasnt appeared in the main story since arc 5 and he still has a Lot of character development to do). and of course fiction is fiction, we can all take away any sort of meaning from a story like this.
but you know. this is my post so im gonna try to analyze felix right now and say my two cents on what i think of his relationship with gender.
so im gonna try not to retread too much on what liquidstar, sufferu, and gourmet of gluttony have already said about felix (and i think theyre all very smart people with interesting analysis posts and theyve all explained their thoughts pretty well) and instead add on with my own thoughts - theres this felix excerpt from arc 4 wn that i think about sometimes. im gonna put it down here!!
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and also important to note—like other people have mentioned, crusch and felix made a “deal” of sorts in the past where crusch takes on felix’s masculinity and felix takes on crusch’s femininity. and also like other people have said—and i myself have said in the past—i do have some mixed feelings on this wkdndn and as i said before also i do wish tappeis feelings on gender bled a little less when theyre Not Integral To The Story. bc i dont think tappei 100% knows hes made trans coded characters, but. anyway yeah so thats the whole deal with crusch felix. and in its own right i think it has So Many Interesting Implications!!
i think when it comes down to it, gender presentation IS a bit of a performance, isn't it? like i love to wear dressses and skirts and i love to keep my hair short and wear suits, but you know - these sorts of things tend to be gendered. our gender is often perceived through how we present ourselves, but in recent years gender roles being attached to clothing has gotten a bit less Rigid. but these rigid roles associated with presentation are even more dialed up to Eleven in a medieval world like the rezero fantasy world. and i dont use the word "performance" in a negative way -
what i mean is that when it comes to felix's character, does felix think he's a boy because that's what he's been told? does he think he's a boy because he TRULY sees himself that way, or does he THINK he has to see himself as one? does felix try to present and perform femininity, ie as or like a traditionally feminine girl, purely ONLY for crusch's sake, or is it because felix ALSO WANTS to? what does felix think of gender outside of crusch? who is felix outside of crusch? who is felix outside of tying his entire personality to other people? does felix’s femininity show the “radiance of ferris’ soul” bc of the deal he made with crusch or bc this truly is felix’s soul? these are like the big questions behind his entire character and character arc that would determine in the end how felix identifies in both his gender and In General.
so what is felix's identity at the moment? bc right now, felix is stuck between his feminine self, tied to crusch, a symbol of crusch, tied to his own reliance on crusch and worship of her—and his masculine self, someone broken off from crusch. felix is tied to crusch right now to worrying extents with his obsessive devotion to the point of changing himself to mold into her image, and beyond that, hes still tied to guilt surrounding fourier’s death. gourmet of gluttony puts all of this way way more intelligently than i ever could, but at the end of the day, i think the best narrative decision here would be for felix to accept himself in ALL of his entirety.
healing in rezero is noted to be a kind power, specifically by fourier and fourier saying this right to felix when hes the most talented healer in lugunica, and healing itself is often stereotypically feminine activity. knighthood is stereotypically masculine, and on top of all this, we see in ex1 that biehn argyle twists the power of healing into something grotesque—trying to bring back the dead and revive what cant be revived, which is once again another reoccurring theme in rezero.
how far can “from zero” go? what HAS to stay dead and what can be revived? who is allowed to live? HOW do you live freely? felix is someone born from a horribly abusive and neglectful family who twisted healing magic’s kindness into cruelty, felix is someone who was taken into a family that showed him kindness and now hes desperate to pay them back with everything he has and everything he is, felix is a healer who lashes out when hes cornered and a healer who treasures life and a knight who cant physically fight like the others, felix is someone stuck with the horrible knowledge that he cant save everyone—that some things just Couldnt end better no matter how much he wished for it to.
felix is stuck between all kinds of worlds, and in terms of gender, hes quite literally still stuck between boyhood and manhood in the biological sense—hes purposefully made it so that he hasnt hit puberty yet so he can better pass as feminine. he hasnt Physically Grown past puberty—which is the mark of becoming an adult. and he hates himself in a number of ways, but he also hates himself for failing to be traditionally masculine. his abusive family stole ten years of his life and the torture left him physically weaker, so he cant be strong physically, which is something associated with traditional masculinity. felix is the best healer, a traditionally feminine job and skill, but he cant save everyone. felix becomes more feminine as part of his deal with crusch, but while crusch accepts her femininity and masculinity readily, and while crusch’s memory is erased by gluttony—felix is left behind, alone, still holding onto femininity while not entirely being able to hold onto it while he also cant entirely hold onto the traditional masculinity he expects out of himself. and with arc 3 on, felix feels hes failed both fourier and crusch. the two most important male and female figures in his life.
felix is basically stuck in this liminal space where hes not Enough for himself in literally every direction, and the only way out is to accept every part of himself and move forward by trying to define who he is without other people—his birth family and his found family dont define him. they can shape him, sure, but he has to stop shaping himself to meet them and figure out how to let himself just. Be. and take up a space thats firmly his. from a queer lens, this kind of thing is pretty queer—because to stop being in between worlds, you have to accept everything instead of splitting yourself into halves over and over again. killing or maiming yourself or parts of yourself is no way to live, and felix is Life itself.
and i think regardless of the Exact Labels you could give felix, i think his arc—which is perfectly in line with all of rezeros themes—is inherently about self acceptance and the bridging of the gap and combination of femininity and masculinity. felix is both and identifies, in one way or another, with both, similar to how he loves someone who identifies with both (crusch) and just as hes loved her and fourier. imo it wouldnt be right for felix to choose one or the other in terms of feminine vs masculine—he needs to be the one learning and navigating his honest feelings on both sides bc i think he Yearns to be both. hes a boy who dresses like a girl and its up to him to know if he wants to be a man and/or a woman due to his own internal desire or if parts of that is Only due to external pressures.
--
and alright now that ive said all my thoughts on felix atm im gonna address the other questions you had in your ask!! note that this is just my opinions and thoughts regarding my own experience in the english fandom, you dont have to agree or anything 👍
but i AM very sorry about your negative experiences in this fandom. T^T people calling other transphobic for using he/him for felix (and also people being transphobic about characters like felix or subaru/natsumi in general) is something ive seen as well. the rezero fandom is sadly very often toxic and Bigoted in a lot of ways (with the exception of rezero tumblr and certain segments of rezero ao3, from what ive seen), which is Ironic for a story thats so clearly about love and self-acceptance, which is also ironic because arguably tappei and otsuka and the rezero marketing team (i Love the female characters in rezero but theres just so much sexualized or vaguely sexist merch/moments that dont add to the story, you know? kind of just. misses the point of their characters sometimes.) sort of contribute to it a little bit as much as tappei does do some really great things with his writing.
rezero is the first fandom ive been active in but its definitely not the first ive ever been in, and ive been in some insane fandoms before. like i said earlier though, i think i just cope by curating my experience to what i like, yknow? liking posts i enjoy, looking at stuff i enjoy, etc :O !! fandom is a hobby so i try not to look at negative stuff when i can help it wkdnd. which im sure youre aware about already but i always have to keep reminding myself of this bc places like rezero reddit or twitter get pretty rough!! but its really helped me just following artists and creators i like, enjoying their content, chatting with cool people i vibe with, rezero tumblr being the chillest rezero space in the whole fandom, and its also helped me a lot making rezero content of my own—like this whole blog!! its really shocked me how much people seem to value my thoughts enough to ask me things frequently but i appreciate it pfft. and i hope you guys like reading my posts!!
but yeah like. curate, curate, curate. it helps a LOT and it gets me excited to experience rezero not only by myself you know? not that i didnt have fun by myself but its its own level of fun finally finding spaces to have fun with others!! and i LOVE finding beautiful fanart!! chef’s kiss. and trying to be the change i want to see is satisfying on its own :,) i want to post random shit about rezero, so i post it. i want to make fanart for fun and share it. i want to brute force people into loving otto more so i ottopost (dont worry, i still hate him bc true otto fans also hate him at the same time <3 /lh). i want more queer rezero content so i try to make some more!! brings more personal power i think and its very fun!! and it helps with lessening the quiet despair of fandom toxicity ;-;; (which is something ive done many times and will continue to do sometimes so i feel your pain 🫂) and i promise theres cool people in the fandom 👍 i may reply late to asks or dms but im ALWAYS down to talk about rezero things its so fun 👍👍
and its really really hard sometimes to deal with fandom toxicity especially if its forcefully knocking at your door—definitely dont force yourself to stay or look at things if you cant, bc thats totally understandable!! and i myself have been harassed a little in the past. but definitely having some sort of coping—the block button, backing out of things you dont agree with or like, lots and lots of curating, etc—helps me a lot. and i think mental health wise i feel much better trying to look on the bright side of things!! its MY hobby goddammit!! ill fight people subaru-style if they try to poison it!! and however long anyone reading this decides to spend with rezero and rezero tumblr—you are welcome here 👍
but yes my very Long rambling aside - i hope this post somewhat helped you!! felix is a very important character that i like very much and need to learn more about and i have Many Feelings on the english side of this fandom, but im very grateful to all the cool people ive met over the years here for sure!! :o
also ill probably post the finished version soon but if youve read this far here is a sneak peak of felix art i did recently (just as a reward for once again reading all of my Endless Yapping)👍👍
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fictionfixations · 4 months ago
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This is so off topic but i really want to write a time travel fic of someone twst. Like an actual multichapter one not just the oneshot with silver and sebbie (and yuu) I blame the actual sebek time travel fic i read before i made it to book 7 And i blame the fact i had a dream where sebek had time traveled and like he was doing stuff to undo things and he got caught and they were waiting for him to explain and it was tense and somehow he ended up pretending to be asleep to get out of it and also did i forget to mention that I was sebek and it felt so real that for a few minutes i was just sitting there in bed still pretending to be asleep waiting for someone to leave and then slowly was trying to think like ‘..this doesnt feel like–’ cause sebek was like leaning on lilia’s shoulder ????? or something like that and i realized WAIT that was just a DREAM
Its wild. Like. there was this person who was like trying to get sebbie to stop threateningly like ‘i have a criminal record’ and he kept repeating it and its just aAAA (as in they arent afraid to get violent D:) IDK it felt like there was like some war going on in the background with lilia and malleus and some horrible thing was going to happen that sebek wanted to stop
And so it was in the library with something something secret passage that led to like 3 glowing blue balls (HAHA BALLS) on top of like a cushion in a box and i cant remember wtf they did just that they were important. I cant remember if it was a bad thing or not. I think that probably came from LoCF influence cause of the thing in the library crossman curse thingy whatever i forgot
But so it was really nerve wracking.
And i remember reading this fic with general lilia having a twin and it was started because the person writing it had dreams of it. And i was like woah thats cool. I dont think id have dreams like that but id like to.
HAHA i jinxed myself like months later cause wtf it felt weirdly real even though its nothing like my irl life. Like usually i get tricked because its taking place in locations ive been to before (i once had a dream i had a cat and i felt so sad because i didnt have one irl) but NOPE 
Anyway idk where silver was but it was strongly implied that it was in the past past like general lilia type past except malleus existed then too
Idk why sebek was there (or why i was sebek ??? i think i just got huge brainrot rfom that sebek time travel fic tbh)
but so . i was so hesitant to say something about it bc idk it felt weird so i sat on this for 4 days but weirdly enough i still remember a good chunk of it like the many details i just didnt write down originally
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..i feel like this is a sign i should write it. i just wish i knew what the balls were for 💀. i mean i think it was bad because the library was implied to be like in like their home or base right?? and he was trying to take it away. but he was gonna touch it with his bare hand idk dream logic causing dumb shit im pretty sure they're magical balls.
anyway i cant remember if he managed to get them or if he got caught or how?? did he get caught in the act? i mean how else would they be suspicious???
in the first place why are they not suspicious of him being there
like
like
did he somehow bullshit his way in there
like okay JP spoilers (i think it'll appear in the NEXT main story update on EN)
like how he was like describing to baur his grandpa (who is baur btw but baur doesnt know it i dont think?) and like how hes half fae and baur acknowledging him as one of them and is like 'well for all i know you could be a zigvolt' and like being accepting and its just like shfuisdhfuisehdij
but so anyway that worked so idk maybe it works for them. idfk what excuse he made up
aughhhh why do i have to have brainrot over this when im trying to write something else tho
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vivaladicamillo · 2 years ago
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I GOTCHU WITH THE WRITER'S BLOCK... okay, so an imagine (or whatever you prefer) of the reader doing dumb shit with bam and ry as teenagers
DOING DUMB SHIT WITH TEEN!RYAN DUNN AND BAM MARGERA!
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ABSOLUTELY ADORE THIS IDEA!!!! thank u so much for requesting this bro ive had writers block for so long but now ppl are sending in requests im forcing myself to write soooo, yea!!! enjoy!!!
WARNINGS: dumb decisions, some teen drinking, teens just doing stupid shit in general
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ok so u, bam and ryan were CRAZY in highschool
the three of u used to get into trouble every day
theres been multiple incidents for u guys having to run from the police
lets set the scene
you bam and ryan got a little too drunk at a house party once
not ur guys fault the punch was spiked 🤷
the three of u decide to leave the party early, leaving raab, rake and dico to there own accord
then u get a genius idea
ur neighbor has a trampoline AND a pool
u bring up a plan to the guys
“dudes, my neighbor has a trampoline and a pool, u guys wanna sneak in?”
ofc they both agreed
u made it seem like u and this neighbor were decently close
but u literally talked to them once
so the three of u end up jumping ur fence and going into ur neighbors backyard
for hours the three of u went wild
u guys striped down to ur undies (hahah undies) and jumped in the pool, splashing and just fucking with eachother
bams doing backflips from the trampoline into the pool
you and ryan are giggling and jumping into the pool
everything went so fast the next thing u knew u were running from the cops in ur underwear and sneakers running from the cops
u guys hid out in a bush, getting all scratched up and u had to call jess to come pick yall up
it was worth it in the end tho
that happened multiple times but with different reasons why the cops ur chasing u
and when it came to filming stunts and bits
yall 3 always did stupid shit together
ryan, was more of a worrier when it came to u and bam doing stunts
bam, was the encouragement when it came to u and ryan doing stuff (more like enabler)
and you just did anything, stunts, bits, rlly anything that u could do without being sent to the hospital
in school, u and ryan were in a lot of classes together
bam was in some too
then the 3 of u guys were together please pray for that teacher
they are both trying to make u laugh, trying to talk to u, copying off ur papers, literally anything but actually doing the work
u basically live at apes house
u either crash on the couch, bams floor, or one of the guest rooms
u guys are literally just so close its crazy
people either think u and bam are dating, u and ryan are dating or bam and ryan are dating
watching bam skate at the skate park, maybe even filming some shit for him
listening to ryan talk about his haggard ass cars for hours
and them hearing and seeing all ur little hobbies
u like drawing? ryan and bam def show off ur art and have some hanging on their walls
sewing/crochet ? u made them beanies for christmas one year with the cky logo on it and they we’re OBSESSED
yall are just the three musketeers and dont let anyone tell u anything different
—————————————-
hope yall enjoyed! this idea is so cute and makes me so delulu AUGHWHWLMELE
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josephtrohman · 11 months ago
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wait, now I'm curious, can you show your fob tattoos?
sorry for the delay anon, i wanted to take the time to potentially take some better pics and i had a very busy evening last night lol. tattoo tour under the cut!!!
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my futct keyhole tattoo was my first tattoo gotten at the beginning of february :3 i can’t wait to go back to this artist bc she killed it but it also was my most expensive tattoo (understandably so) so i need to save up but i have more non fob ideas i want to take to her based on her portfolio. it’s a little purple cuz this is from when it was still fresh and the purple is from the stencil but i feel a lil self conscious about my arm rn so i can’t take a better pic rn lol it’s not purple tho
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this one was the second one i got and it’s a difficult location for me to photograph since this is on the outside of my ankle lol. i got this one incredibly impulsively near the end of february, bc i had a stressful evening and before going to bed i looked up tattoo shops near me that had online booking availability for the next day, and i booked after looking at the guy’s portfolio a bit even tho he practices more traditional styles n traditional tattoos aren’t my fav. i really wanted to get something special to remember my 8ball, and i was really excited and proud about coming up with this idea on my own!! this one i was slightly upset with at first bc i just think i should have waited but now that ive gotten used to it i appreciate it soooo much more!!!! and now im really happy and think it looks cool :) also this one hurt like a BITCH i wasn’t expecting it given the relative ease of my first one (the shading was rough on the first one but that was it), and the guy even offered me numbing spray for the black, but i powered through and he was very impressed with me and said i was tough lol :)
these next two i got at the same time and for some reason i can’t take a good pic of the one rn (it’s got a lot of adhesive on it from removing the second skin so it looks kinda bad right at this moment until the adhesive washes off more, but beware the second picture has a little bit of blood)
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pls don’t make fun of my chubby arm but anyways these two i got at the same time just this past saturday from a lady who specializes in tiny tattoos :) the xo is based on how it actually appears on the back of the record, and she tried to font match it and i think it’s soooooooo cute (it’s rly little on my wrist, so little she just charged me for the i swear i say tattoo!!!). i know it’s kind of crazy to get two tattoos for the same song but 1) that’s my song im the number one highest streamer on stats fm, 2) xo has gotten me through so much :( i am considering one more xo tattoo in the future (getting “love never wanted me but i took it anyway” in pete’s handwriting using the font someone made out of his handwriting). but it’s my plan to wait on that one and make that be a far future tattoo, UNLESS they play xo as my 8ball in which case my ass will get it the next chance i get. lol
i maybe have one or two fob themed tattoos i’m potentially interested in getting in the future but that’s like a long term thing, i want to get some tribute to whatever my 8ball may be at minneapolis to go with my fame < infamy tattoo, especially if they play a song that’s one of MY songs, but this is generally where i’ll leave the fob tattoos for a bit and just getting more personal/non music related tattoos lol
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diva2007 · 2 months ago
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get to know me meme
hehe this was an ask game thing but im making it into a survey
1. selfie
no thank u
2. what would you name your future kids?
rosemary and daniel
3. do you miss anyone?
every day, someone different
4. what are you looking forward to?
i have a pretty ring coming in the mail! im also looking forward to buying my friends' late christmas gifts
5. is there anyone who can always make you smile?
my partners <3
6. is it hard for you to get over someone?
incredibly at times
7. what was your life like last year?
very slow and sad but i learned a lot. grew up a lot. learned to be less self centered
8. have you ever cried because you were so annoyed?
no but ive cried from sheer rage
9. who did you last see in person?
my store manager
10. are you good at hiding your feelings?
im not sure. to some people, i think so. but to others im an open book. i like to think i am.
11. are you listening to music right now?
yeah! sleep like wolves by lalleshwari
12. what is something you want right now?
ooogh 10 lashings for every transgression committed
13. how do you feel right now?
a little nauseous. kinda horny. good mood tho
14. when was the last time someone of the opposite sex hugged you?
my dad just this morning
15. personality description
im sort of stoic and quiet at first. i dont express very well and tend to say whatevers on my mind. im quick to make jokes and have a very dry sense of humor. but im a gift giver and i like to think im very generous. im pretty patient. sleazy to the right crowd. my closest friends all think im very cuties
16. have you ever wanted to tell someone something but you didn’t?
of course?
17. opinion on insecurities.
my own or in general? in general, no one cares as much as you do. and on my own.. most of them are psychological and rarely crop up. sometimes i wish i were more subtle. more gentle.
18. do you miss how things were a year ago?
oh god no
19. have you ever been to New York?
nope
20. what is your favourite song at the moment?
21. age and birthday?
24. 07/26
22. description of crush.
hehehehe noooo... hes 6'2.
23. fear(s)
heights.. being alone for the rest of my life. god.
24. height
5'8
25. role model
jackie kennedy and sharon tate
26. idol(s)
fiona apple, trent reznor, gerard way, bob dylan, pete wentz
27. things i hate
neglect of responsibilities. hypocrites. explaining myself
28. i’ll love you if…
youre thoughtful and show effort for me
29. favourite film(s)
the matrix, the secretary, crash, saw 1
30. favourite tv show(s)
gotham, the golden girls, who's the boss, three's company
31. 3 random facts
a. i smoke marlboro menthol blacks
b. i use the same monitoring headphones as trent reznor
c. my not sf(w) tumblr is @boykink
32. are your friends mainly girls or guys?
my best friend is a girl but my system friends are all guys
33. something you want to learn
how to play an instrument... french... russian...
34. most embarrassing moment
probably starting my period at work recently and needing to run off in the middle of a rush
35. favourite subject
psychology and behavioral forensics
36. 3 dreams you want to fulfill?
having kids, owning a house, travelling to greece at least once
37. favourite actor/actress
james spader, jesse eisenberg, maggie and jake gyllenhaal, river phoenix, keanu reeves
38. favourite comedian(s)
jim carrey, chris fleming
39. favourite sport(s)
ice skating, acrobatics
40. favourite memory
getting engaged to my partner a year and a half ago
41. relationship status
engaged
42. favourite book(s)
flowers in the attic and misery
43. favourite song ever
whisper by evanescence
44. age you get mistaken for
-21. im not joking everyone i work with thought i was like 19 or something. i once had a school bus stop for me earlier this year
45. how you found out about your idol
knowing good music ig
46. what my last text message says
its dirty i cant share
47. turn ons
scent, pain, bein a little mean.
48. turn offs
not being confident enough, letting me lead, being unhygenic
49. where i want to be right now
in the same place just with chocolate milk
50. favourite picture of your idol
dont wanna find one so skip
51. starsign
leo
52. something i’m talented at
poetry i think! and maybe making music
53. 5 things that make me happy
a. cats
b. my partner
c. my best friend
d. plushies
e. jewelry
54. something thats worrying me at the moment
money and food, always
55. tumblr friends
they know who they areeee
56. favourite food(s)
apparently theyre called jaffa cakes. love those. curry and rice (any kind). salsa verde.
57. favourite animal(s)
cats, white tail deer, bears, bunny rabbits
58. description of my best friend
shes hard headed but so so earnest and sweet to everyone. shes the funniest person in the world and could make a dead man laugh. shes one of the last good people on this earth and shes everything to me. i hope we never die and if we do its at the same time. shes also mean as FUCK
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monstrouslyobsessed · 1 year ago
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some of these are SUPER old, gomen, so it'll be all under the cut for yall sanity. i really need to start answering more timely rip
tw: mild implications of noncon (cerelos), psychological mindfucks (cerelos), mentions of pregnancy (dol)
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Oh, I can wait for your content as long as it takes! Creating is not an easy task, so take your time, dear. Ofc, posting everyday is cool, blah-blah, but your health and mental state is much more important. Don't worry about this <3 And talking about DoL, did you get to Ivory Wraith already? Who is your faves generally? —anonymous
did i not answer this before??? tumblr, please. anyway, ye i did! plotwise, very very fascinating. gameplay wise, annoying as heck when i was in middle of things i was working towards to lol i do wish ivory wraith's plot wouldn't be centered around weird anal/ear/whatever pregnancy tho, thats…kinda not my thing kdshkds--and thats coming from someone who writes preg on the regular. pls dev.
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Ahhhh don't feel bad! Ur content is top-tier and u r a lovely perfect bun! Even quick look on your post is enough to feel that you're always working hard to give your best – it's we who should be thankful for all food u r giving </3
A lot lot lot of love to ya, dear 🥰 @iwanthistongue
dawww thank you dear <3333 i just wish i have it in me to be the super productive like some of the epic writers on this platform, but i dont dsklhdsl so all i can do is to do my best and provide every so often <3 also sorry that i cant seem to ping you???
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Omg you're into dol? Who's your favorite character so far? —anonymous
eden, tbh! i ran into a scenario where they kidnapped me angry after being gone for too long. oof, what happened after that…wheeoooow but most of the characters are pretty dang good too!! i'd like to focus more love on kylar but theyre quite...annoying gameplay wise so…augh lol
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i crave more beastfolk content 🤤 maybe something with a male reader dealing with a few yandere beastfolk who are trying to one-up each other and compete for him? male!yandere x male!reader content is a bit hard to find, especially if it's transmale!reader —anonymous
just send in an ask and i'll see what i can do! i found writing male readers (be it cis or not!) a little tricky sometimes, because i always feared crossing that…bad line, yanno? in spite of the contents i write.
that said, i'm all for writing more gays, just need a little nudge and sparks to write one~
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have you heard of scp 401? —anonymous
…huh, this is a pron in the making. but no! this is the first ive heard of it. im aware of scp and knew some of its characters but not this one!!
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Happy bday! I hope you got yourself a nice treat! —anonymous Happy birthday, dear! 🥳—anonymous Happy (i guess)late birthday, luv!!! Thank you for writing at this special day, hope your day was amazing <3 —anonymous
ohhhh this is months late;;; im so sorry but thank you all so much for your kind bday wishes!! ily all a bunch!!!
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OMG YESSSS LORE!!! MORE MORE MORE <333 Thank you for the food, I can't stop re-reading 😭😭😭 —anonymous
ye~i mainly wanted to do more centaur pron tbh LOL glad you liked my nasty bois!
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For a few days I had a thought- I hope it's ok to share ahaha- Okay, so – after getting in his grasp his future bride were acting so, so good. Her dedication is admirable, she's a quick learner and charismatic enough to get the liking of the teachers and maids. Her gentle and caring nature shows while she's communicating with others – no surprise everyone likes her. She's the same she was the day he met her... But the thing is, after all of this, she's absolutely terrified of Cerelos. She's not crying and wailing, but she's getting so quiet, so uncomfortable in his company, she always hiding her eyes and never tries to speak first – and she trembles so, so bad every time they're touching! Last time she even fainted from all nerves. How he may act and how mad he would be that servants getting more smiles and laughs than him? —anonymous
hmmm depends on why the darling is frightened tbh are they always afraid or is this started after cerelos took them the first time? i do imagine he'd be pretty upset and even offended, though he won't outwardly show his feelings. he'd probably start ordering the servants to disappear whenever the darling is in sight, be invisible, to further isolate them, to force them either to face their loneliness and/or accept cerelos as their emperor and husband. since humans are in nature social, they'd naturally long for some form of company and possibly some skin to skin contact.
in short, since the coecrced sex doesn't seem to do enough, cerelos would've likely infict some psychological damages on his darling to force them to accept him. he wouldn't be…physically abusive, no, but he will emotionally and mentally cripple his darling without relying on cruel words and uses some amount of gaslighting.
regardless, you will only have him and you will love him. he is, after all, your emperor and husband. why wouldn't you embrace him and his power?
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Hi! I hope this is okay to ask: I saw one of your slightly older asks, and you mentioned you have a draft with a slime monster. I'm very curious about that one (but I also love your writing in general!), so I just wanted to ask you if you plan on finishing it —anonymous
.....sdhdflsk i thought i posted it, gosh dang it. well, i'll look into this later. if nothing else, it would be nice to go back and post my shitty 5 minutes thoughts again.
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Hello how are you ? Hope you are doing well ❣️ I wanted to ask if you will continue or write anything similar like the rabbit hybrid fic ..it's my fav and i also like the ghost husband fic ..sorry if i made u uncomfortable👉👈...Have a nice day💖 —anonymous
i'm doing better!! <3 ty for checking in, luvvv
and after some waffling around, i considered since human/beastfolk hybrids are so rare and are considered the 'monsters' of their world (ig basically, considered as 'mythical', like yeti's and such, but actually does exist, kind of monsters), i figured it couldn't hurt to make these sad hybrids canon to my universe soooooooo ye i wouldn't mind doing more of them!! also i've done a crocodile hybrid one, if you've missed that one.
no, no, you're good! <3 loves getting asks like this~
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the momster is back!!! we missed you, hope you’re having a good day <333 (p.s i am a monster fucker through and through, i will literally read and love anything you write mwah) @letskidaddle
daww youre so sweet!!! <3 ty!! monster fuckers united!!!! and yes you have a lovely day as well!!
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whewwww, thats some asks to get through hhhh but man tumblr is so ugly. anyone know the fix to get it back to its simple self??
anyway, im slowly getting into the swing of things. got couple wips i can work on, maybe, and clear the inboxs for a fresh start (sorry to anyone who were waiting on certain things!! you can send them again tho!! a clean slate is needed imo). anyway, hope yall are doing wonderfully <3
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moreaujeans · 6 months ago
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hi leigh!! i hope you're well :) saw your post with asks and decided i would combine lots of them lol so first thing is tell me abt whatever's bothering you!! i hope nothing's bothering you obv but still.
also i am asking you for book recs. i haven't been reading a lot of proper books lately so any recs are welcome but i kind of feel like some fantasy would do me good. but like good ones? The last couple of years i've been picking up some popular fantasy standalones hoping they feel like a fantasy book you read when you're twelve and they end up being the most mid thing i've ever read. like help. i'm planning to read some robin hobb books so hopefully they're good.
also i've started listening to mitski (talk about being late lol) and i'm really liking her songs i was wondering if you have any particular recs? Or any music recs? what've you been listening to?
sorry this ask is all over the place lol i guess i'm chatty today. i hope you're having an amazing day!! <3<333
ORLA!!!! i hope you are doing well too <3 one thing that is bothering me is school is starting again bc i have gotten virtually no break </3 also that apparently the english class i’m taking doesn’t have any required books i was looking forward to reading actual books not whatever mini readings ig they’re going to be giving us instead ☹️ also also that i did Not in fact get my license like planned this summer bc during the singular week i was home a bunch of stuff suddenly came up and it became no longer my priority and now i will need to renew my permit Again bc it expires in early september and im not going to be able to make it home before that so. <3
as for book recs!! i have tragically had the same problem lately re fantasy books and honestly mostly just books in general BUT i don’t know if you’ve read any ve schwab ive really loved what books of hers ive read. vicious was my favorite, but the monsters of verity duology better fits the “feels like a fantasy book you read when you’re twelve” vibe!
for non-fantasy recs if youre feeling poetry i reallyy liked margaret atwood’s morning in the burned house. also just finished hitchhiker’s guide to the galaxy which was v fun! got many laughs out of me, i did not however know before starting it that it’s a series so now idk how to proceed bc i only have the first book agdjfk
OH ALSO fantasy shoutout to strange the dreamer duology 🫶🏻🫶🏻 lovely writing style and world, fascinating antagonist, i was not a big fan of the romance but otherwise big rec on that. definitely not for everyone tho some ppl find the pacing too slow, i remember when i first read it i mentioned that in my review too that it took a bit for me to really get into although i personally wasn’t bored in the meantime like others, i was just chilling enjoying what it had to tell me abt everything
MITSKI RECS!! i love strawberry blond sorry for being basic. square too but specifically square solo piano version which they took off of spotify (idk what you’re listening to her on). because dreaming costs money my dear is also a veryyy hard-hitting one. fond of circle, a burning hill, goodbye my danish sweetheart, nobody, washing machine heart, and class of 2013 as well. that was a lot i will stop now 🫡 also must admit i am quite behind on mitski’s recent releases so i can’t speak for any of her newer albums/songs. except for working for the knife musically it doesn’t hit as much as other songs of hers for me but lyrically it makes me go crazy
as for random music recs my most recently liked songs are unsweetened lemonade by amélie farren, army dreamers by kate bush, numb little bug by em beihold, would that i by hozier, the milk carton by madilyn mei, and comme des enfants by cœur de pirate. i have not really been “listening” listening to anything lately! though that will change in a few days with wisdom saga >:)
— sleepover saturday sunday!
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littlest-bugz · 1 year ago
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current hyperfixation? (feel free to infodump!!)
YIPPEEE!!! This made my day FR!! Thank you, mutual <3
ANYWAYS
This is kind of embarrassing, but I’ve been deeply invested by my own OCverse for going on 8 years now. Its my Special Interest, which sucks because,,, im the only one who can make content of these stinkies,,,,,
I really find it hard to hyperfixate on anything else because of the fact Ive been invested for so long (except for Web Design and coding, which I wont infodump about, since its literally all for these stories, deadass).
It is not fun at times because 1) all the characters live rent free in my head and criticize how I write them in my novels [that DID life] and 2) its SO hard to make new projects and get attached to them. Ive been trying for 2 years to make a horror project out of one concept but I seriously cant get fully invested and it SUCKS. Let me make my silly little horror web series damnit!!!!! (@ my brain)
I have 3 novels and one fantasy series im working on so,,,, Infodump time >:3c
TWs: Terminal Illness + brief mentions of (mental institute) hospitalization, murder, war, and some others that I’m not 110% sure the exact tags for them (basically kind of cannibalism, but between nonhuman species). Other than terminal illness, they’re super brief mentions, but still proceed with caution.
Right now, I’m working on one of the books I’ve been writing for nearly my whole time writing. Ive been only working on it since feb 1st (it’s, like, the THIRD draft tho).
Blurb about book
Melissa is a bassist in a rock band she formed with her high school friends. Just as her, and her friends’, career begins takes off, she gets diagnosed with a terminal illness. With a month left to live, and a shit ton of unfinished business, she invokes her best friend’s patron deity who is capable of miracles, Flip. Melissa and Flip make a pact to keep her alive until her business is over, but oh no! Melissa has caught the eyes of another god, and a pretty shitty one at that. How is she going to make her last months peaceful if she’s being hunted down by a god?
The working title is called “Ensuring Your Spot In Hell” because Flip is, essentially, a demon in the universe (rules an infernal ring of hell- it means I would have to explain the worldbuilding around hell and its A LOT), but titles are!!! So hard for me!!!
A list of random facts about the book™️ because I don’t want to write full paragraphs bc I can go on forever if u ask me to:
Flip’s name is a shortened version of his actual name, Fli’pyek. Furthermore, the domain Flip rules over is that of Wrath and Violence
Trinity (Melissa’s childhood bestie, and the friend that worship’s Flip) is a hereditary witch and pagan. Her family has been worshipping Flip and practicing witchcraft for several generations! They literally have their own holy book (generational BoS/Grimoire/whatever u want to call it).
Melissa had been sick with the disease™️ since she was 16. She just neglected the shit out of her own health (me too bestie, me too). It easily could have been prevented if she went to the doctor back when she was, at least, 18 years old, max 24.
At the time Melissa is diagnosed with her terminal illness, she’s 26. By the time she was supposed to die, she would’ve been freshly 27. Has anyone heard of the 27 club theory before? Or is it just an obscure reference I made LMAO
Melissa has extended biological family that worships Flip! It gets super awkward when Melissa visits them with Flip lol
The other primordial god that Melissa finds herself in a predicament with is named Ama, the god of Cruelty and Torture. Not a swell guy to get mixed up with, that’s for sure!
Melissa has an orange and white cat named Cheddar!
Flip always smells like whiskey and freshly cut tobacco. At all times. It’s bc his blood smells like it (and tastes like it too, but why are you tasting it? /j)
Any other facts might be getting into spoiler territory, BUT!! Thats the one Im working on rn, in February. In January I worked on another book, but that one honest to gods might be too triggering for this acc for an indepth thingy like the book I just did. It’s being rewritten to not be so triggering, but bc it’s a throw up of some of our trauma, it’s not an easy task to censor it.
REGARDLESS, Here’s a rundown of ALL of my main novels (minus the one I already talked about)
The Case of Twin Woods [mystery, drama, crime] (the one i worked on January)
Chastity hates her life. She hates her shitty job, she hates her shitty friends, and she hates her shitty family. After opening up too much to an online friend about her chronic suicidality, Chastity gets taken to Twin Woods Mental Institute, the state’s mental institution. There she befriends an eccentric group of patients, then finding out something terrible might be going on with the head warden, Leon Bellamy. She takes it upon herself to find out and solve the mystery, but she may have bitten off more than she can chew.
Untitled One (but leaning towards the name of ‘Jealousy’ or somethin idk) [drama, romance, crime]
Mia has a quiet life. She works at a library, she fosters cats, and by all means, has what could be considered a ‘boring life’. One day, she gets laid off from her job under the excuse of “cutting costs”, leaving her without a job and severance. While scrambling for a job, she finds one at a local cafe, the most frequented one in the city. There she befriends one of the regulars, a cold, quiet man named Zander, and after she unknowingly helps Zander’s brother, she becomes significantly closer to him. However, her boss, a bitter ex of Zander’s, hears about their ensuing closeness and decides she doesn’t like what’s going on. One failed dinner party and murder attempt later, Mia is left scrambling to hide that she killed Angelina in self defense. Will she be successful in hiding the murder? Or will the justice system make quick work of her?
Untitled Fantasy Series (has about 2 actual novels and 3 novellas… a possible third novel too) [drama, romance]
book one
Since his birth, King Sunshine has known his fate. He is to be sacrificed for the greater good of the realm he resides, killing his oppressive father, but losing his life in the process. It’s a prophecy that has been laid out since the beginning of Racktokian history, one King Sunshine was never able to escape due to his father’s unspoken rage at his own murder. After meeting a Vurtock for the first time, a species his father only used as cattle, Sunshine finds himself quickly entangled in a plot to overthrow his own father to liberate the Vurtockian race. He knows what he has to do, but it isn’t easy.
book two
The great war tore apart the country King Sunshine called home. His father left no stone unturned from his rage, and public opinions split the people. In the rubble of his home, he builds a new country founded on the importance of the civilians, only to be elected as a King in place of his father. Living in the palace he always called home, but had tried to escape, he finds that his father keeps sending assassins to make attempts on his life. One assassin, a vurtock with nothing to lose, hits a soft spot in Sunshines heart. After deescalating the attempt on his life, he offers the vurtock to stay in his castle until they’re able to find the proper resources to help him build a life in the new country. Far away from the oppressive dictatorship of his father. Yet, as his guest begins to stay for longer than intended, he sees that yet another step in the prophecy will begin.
Despite how the second book blurb is written, it’s more from the vurtock’s point of view than Sunshine’s. I just had a total brain fart.
The novellas for the fantasy book follow the POV of other important characters, such as the ruler of the Vurtockian rebellion, the POV of other rulers. For a while I wanted to write one from Raphaël’s POV, but I decided it wouldn’t be worth writing a whole book about a piece of shit finding joy in the pain he causes. Like, no thanks, ill pass.
Theres a possible 3rd book that would essentially be an extended epilogue, since the prophecy doesn’t stop at Sunshine’s death. I just haven’t thought as far as the 2 books and 3 novellas, in terms of outlining the books and stuff.
I honestly could give TONS more info on the fantasy books because that part of my universe has been around nearly the whole time Ive been writing. I have maps of the world, maps of countries, maps of even just cities, house and castle layouts, moodboards, art. Visual references galore. Not to mention the playlists for each character + each book. I also made a document called “The Remian Bible” because it has everything about the world in it, including the alphabets of the languages, grammar structures for said languages and literally 5 holy books for the religions even tho they wont evEN BE TALKED ABOUT IN ENOUGH DEPTH (why did i do that to myself /lh j/. It doesn’t help that I still want the write the holy books in their native languages… oo,,, and imagine writing the actual novels in the native languages,,,,). It’s honestly kind of,,, surreal how much time Ive put into this world 🧍 Like??? Damn,,,,
BUT YEAH!!! Those are all the books that take place in my ocverse + some other info!!! The things that are my hyperfixation,,,, My own books and world LMAO— The books don’t include half of the ocs in my ocverse tho, so thats where the website im coding comes in. It’ll have short stories based on the backstories of various characters on it, and Yes, even the background characters will be on it bc Im fucking bonkers and fleshed them out, even though some of them are in one scene for 2 minutes.
That being said, if anyone, or u mutual (if u read this wall of text), found any of this interesting, or wants to read even just the prologue of any of these, DM me!! I’m always looking for beta readers!! Or people to talk to about it too, that’d be fantastic. I really need beta readers, so seriously. DM me if u want to read my cringey stories!! I can give better in depth tws too!!!
EDIT: I need to mention that I go through spurts of hyperfixating on only one book or series. Thats why its both my hyper fixation AND my Special Interest
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youredreamingofroo · 1 year ago
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Ya'll... I think I might start a new story, I have a... basic concept of what I want it to be like, and I already have a name (under the impression that I don't suddenly do a 180), I just need to do like... all the writing and make the characters LMFAO It's gonna be a little on the dreary side and dark (which is the kind of writing/genre i aspire to write about, also means I'm gonna have to redo my personal reshade that ive been cooking for like... 3 or 4 months... 😭)-
in the meantime, I might start working on gussying up my navi post (and by gussy up, i mean completely redo) because as nice as it is, it's, idk, a little outdated (i guess), I have an idea for a new theme except i'm either going to a) put it in the drafts and wait til I start the new story to post it so the info is all there or b) make it and then post it and when i start the new story, edit it and put the tags and stuff in for the story.
ALSO might do a name change cuz... this name came from WAYYY before i joined simblr, and its got a charm to it, but i dont rlly like it anymore,, it just dont sit with me the same way that it used to lmao
*(writing this after i posted cuz i forgot to say this - its under the cut and in regards to NSB with the new story - it also kinda turned into a rant lmfao) TL:DR for ppl who don't wanna read my stupid fucking rant: NSB is prob gonna go on a hiatus regardless of if i start a new story, cuz as much as I love it, it's started to feel like a chore and less of smth i enjoy (even tho, like I said, I rlly enjoy/love it) Sorry to my NSB enjoyers out there.
regarding NSB, yes it will probably go on hiatus when making this story bec writing is already kinda exhausting for me as well as editing and NSB has progressively became more and more story-driven than gameplay-driven, and especially after these three days, im kinda burnt out from NSB, i know i just left it off on a cliffhanger with the new baby, but to be honest, I don't wanna deal with another child, i barely get by dealing with the four, and dealing with toddlers> are so fucking annoying cuz of the Sim AI, which in and of itself is just demotivating, i do REALLY love not so berry, i love the story ive created with it, but i guess im just tired of playing the same generation for so long, not to mention the fact that i made it a rags to riches challenge, i know i didnt have to but i prefer to, and bc of that, i havent been able to properly decorate, and i dont really wanna go back on myself, if i decide to continue NSB, i will probably take the RTR rules away since its so annoying to deal with having like, 1000 simoleans all the damn time. Also, i've been planning what to do for generation 3 since catty gave birth, but i had to put NSB on a hiatus bc of a stupid glitch and was only recently able to start it up again, and I still havent moved onto the next gen. I kinda lost the plot with that rant, but basically, NSB will probably go on hiatus, regardless of the new story, I've been wanting to dwell more on Roo and his whole story and the people in his universe and after a bit, NSB has started to, as much as I love it and the storytelling and whatever, feel like a chore, which kinda hurts to say, but its true. Sorry to any of my not so berry enjoyers out there
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narwhalandchill · 8 months ago
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(just my 2.3 pull / general hsr rambles/rant but i get negative abt fireflys characterization again so thought id hide it for all the fans sake. good for yall & good luck pulling her i just cant get into her)
welp got my e1 gallagher (+ e2 mika) in 30 pulls on firefly so thats it from me, ill get e2 from the character selector so at least thats sth!!! i have been playing him a bit even at e0 and i do overall like how he feels so getting him to that e2 breakpoint where he rly starts to thrive as a sustain pick is v nice
anyway no early firefly which is whatever i consider her in game writing an absolute failure anyway and havent cared enough to watch Any of the trailer stuff either bc like . they lost me in 2.0 im sorry girl no matter how hypothetically good those trailers could be the writing team lost me forever at the ayaka-teppei forced date arc and thats it lmao . she couldve been an actual character but oh well what matters is shoving how cute and perfect and sad and in love with TB she is down ur throat at every fucking moment . her idle animation is so fucking bad too it made me laugh irl at how awful and cheap the fanservice is w her like yeah alright navia idle (which is already the worst idle in genshin i hate it) 💀💀💀 how do you do a characters potential this fucking dirty holy shit . we havent shilled firefly self insert ship to players enough so lets upskirt her too uwu!!!!!
But uhhh yeah thats a me being a hater thing ultimately i just physically cannot stand characters like this and first impressions do matter . Dont let me ruin her for u. nothing but props to her VA too like as much as her general characterizations appeal has been unsuccessful on me still shes been giving it the Absolute most to try to make her feel real and sympathetic and i respect that a lot
Still tho only thing that rly sucks w not just getting firefly at 4 pity or whatever and being done w it is just the. Welp Guess ill proceed to be unable to full clear any of the next 7 AS or MoC updates bc i pulled the wrong characters instead of Good Meta Dev Faves acheron and firefly like havent rly been a fan of the way the shilling has been going recently . like i just have rly shit matchups into the weaknesses of most stages these days and idk i havent even felt like Bothering to do PF 4 bc i just. DoT PF is always the fucking worst and i genuinely dont know what the hell to try to slap at it for a clear. guess my bad for not pulling swan either like truly my mistake . whatever its just a game .
Actually am i getting like burnt out ? well tracks for a honkai game i suppose. ig it also has to do w just the absolutely abysmal luck ive had now like. ive lost LC 75-25 of the 3 times i went for it TWICE . ive lost 50-50 like 5 times in a row now lmao and fully expect to lose on jade too at this point 🙃 might not even manage to get her at all . Sigh guess thats gacha at its worst for u
Sorry this got way more negative than i thought HSJSKSKSKSKSKD i hope the 2.3 story ends up being good at least so theres Sth good about it . and its not like i will die not clearing endgame content w full stars or sth it just sucks bc the way its happening just feels bad
edit: yeah im @ coffee break at work and it took me this fucking long to realize i just casually typed mika instead of misha JSJSTUHTS8J5Z9 💀💀💀💀 im so sorry misha youre way better than that nerd 😭😭😭😭😭 esp at c2 w the def shred i might even build him who knows . So sorry for this
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