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cherrysweets-world · 2 days ago

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Eyes of the Gods IV

series masterlist - part III

Pairing - Geta x fem!reader x Caracalla

Summary - Geta and Caracalla force you further into their world.

Warnings - 18+, unedited, forced proximity, power imbalances, future dub-con, period typical sexism, mentions of domestic violence, masturbation, lonliness, dondus is a girly

Word Count - 2.5k

The majority of your morning passed in a similar fashion. You'd stand against the wall, leaving it on occasion to fetch Geta wine or do whatever else he bid you, which wasn't much. In the light of day and alone he seemed glaringly human. He flipped through the papers on his desk, offering the occasional scoff or scowl, and sometimes even appeared bored.

That was, of course, when he wasn't staring at you. You felt his eyes burning into the side of your face for minutes at a time but stood still, unwilling to meet his gaze. Geta would look down and then quickly up again as if determined to catch you in the middle of something. It would have been amusing if he was not the Emperor.

After several hours of this game, he sat back in his chair and let his pen fall to the table. "Tell the guards outside the door that they are to bring some food."

You bowed your head dutifully but stopped several paces from the door.

"Is there an issue?" he said mockingly.

"I. . .believe that would be my job," you said slowly, turning to face him. "I should fetch whatever it is you request."

Geta seemed to think about this for several seconds. He picked his pen back up and began tapping it against his desk. Tap tap tap.

"Ask them for whatever you want as well," he finally said. "I suppose you have not eaten?"

Your cheeks turned hot. True, you had not. You had been in such a rush this morning that you hadn't had time to stop by the kitchens for your usual morning meal. Geta had kept you so distracted that you had hardly even registered your own hunger.

"I do not believe it is appropriate for me to eat with you," you tried, tapping your nails against your palms.

"Is it appropriate to ignore the orders of the Emperor?"

"No - "

"Well, then."

His eyes dared you to argue further. Swallowing your words, you went to the door and spoke with the guard. You requested fruits and bread for Geta and a bowl of porridge for yourself. The guard's brows raised at the porridge and you shrugged, gesturing behind you as thought that was enough explanation. The guard seemed to think so and you watched as he disappeared down the corridor.

Your purpose here was a mystery to you. It was unusual to have a cupbearer who did only that. You had assumed you would fetch his meals, perhaps tidy up after him too. Instead you had stood at the wall for almost the entire morning. The biggest task was avoiding the Emperor's wandering gaze and it was by far the most exhausting.

"What would you usually be doing at this time?" he asked.

"Uh," you stammered, confused by the question, "I would be in the kitchen, I suppose, Emperor."

Geta tilted his head. You allowed yourself to look up and meet his eyes, desperate to read his mood. Every question felt like he was trying to slip you up, though for what purpose you did not know. Like that night in the entertainment hall, his tongue traced along his top and bottom lip. You found yourself watching the movement and forced yourself to look away.

"I am sure this is preferable, then," he seemed to decide to himself.

You blinked and couldn't help but ask, "My apologies, Emperor, but what is my purpose here?"

It was the most you dared ask but you wanted to know. If you did not then it was more likely you would make a mistake, take a wrong step in this dance he was forcing you through, and the consequences could be deadly. You had assumed you would take up all the responsibilities of a cup-bearer or maid but you were wrong. Now you were left floundering, wondering what to do next. You could not leave yourself any more vulnerable than you already were.

At that moment there was a knock at the door. Grateful for the interruption you rushed over, gladly relieving the guard of the tray of food and whispering a quiet thank you before letting the door fall closed.

Geta still had not answered your question but you carried the tray over to him, sliding it gently onto his desk. You pushed some of his papers aside to make more room and then stepped back, clasping your hands in front of you so as not to look so clueless.

Geta picked out your porridge from the rest of the food and scowled as if it was a personal offence. He pushed it toward you. "Take it. Sit. Eat."

Cautiously you walked away, picking out a chair furthest away from Geta's desk. You pressed your lips together and stared down at it, put off by the elegant craftmanship. You had never sat on something so expensive before.

"Sit,'" he ordered again, popping a grape into his mouth. He was watching you closely as though curious about what you might do. As if you had any other chance but to obey his commands.

You did as he bid, angling your body so that you would not have to face the full force of his stare. Never had you had such a little appetite but you spooned up a mouthful of porridge anyway. It clung to your teeth and was near impossible to swallow. You ate it mechanically, one spoon after another.

It was odd; you felt perhaps more bare now than when you had been forced to dress in front of Geta. Powerful people could demand anything in this world but there were a few things you had been able to rely on with your work in the palace. Food and sleep were two of them.

Caracalla had slipped into your room last night like it was nothing. The Praetorians had not questioned it. They could not and would not have stopped him. Now Geta insisted upon you eating in front of him and you could do nothing but force the food down and pretend that you were in the kitchen, alone, planning the rest of your afternoon.

The door opened once more and you paused. Caracalla shuffled in, Dondus perched upon his shoulders. The monkey spotted you before Caracalla did. She clambered down from his clothes and towards you, using your skirts to pull herself up onto your lap.

You offered her your fingers like before and she greeted you, chattering noisily. Perhaps you and her were not so different; both of you were there for the amusement of the Emperors and not much else. All the wine serving was a pretence but for what, you did not know.

This was the first time you had gotten a good look at Caracalla in the light of day. He seemed much brighter, more awake. The shadow of his illness lingered around his shoulders like a shrugged-off cloak.

Caracalla approached you, swiping his fingers along your bare shoulders as he passed. You almost squeaked as he forced himself beside you, giggling at your tense reaction.

"You should eat something, brother," Geta picked up a bowl of fruits and came over to hand them to his brother. The room felt unbearably hot with both of them in such close proximity. Geta spoke much more softly to his brother than he had you.

Caracalla accepted the bowl with little interest. He picked up a single berry and rolled it between his fingers. A smile tugged on the corners of his lips and he held it up.

"Open up," he demanded.

Flickers of mirth danced around Caracalla's face but his eyes were deadly serious. Last night you had been able to sway him into doing your bidding but you could see that was not possible now.

Geta lingered in front of you, waiting to see how the situation would play out. It felt like a test.

You parted your lips and Caracalla pushed the berry past them, swiping his fingers across your lips as you chewed. There was no humor now. This was something heavier, warmer.

Caracalla pulled his hand away from your face. He absentmindedly traced those same fingers across his own lips, eyes fixated on your mouth.

You tried to focus on your porridge. It was now stone cold. Caracalla let out a whine and demanded your attention back on him, pressing another grape to your mouth and watching hotly as you ate them.

"Good girl," he praised.

It felt like your blood was vibrating. The berries varied between sour and sweet, not unlike the man in front of you. Nonetheless you chewed them and swallowed them down. Your eyes danced across Caracalla's chest, unsure on where to settle.

You were not entirely prudish. You knew the contours and folds of your own body well and had even fumbled around with several boys in your time at the palace. You tended to find more satisfaction with your own hand.

This, though, was unlike any of your previous experiences. Bells were sounding in your mind. There was something oddly erotic about it. Part of you wanted to lean away, divert Caracalla's attention to something else, yet you found yourself leaning in, tilting your chin and letting Caracalla feed you.

It wasn't until Caracalla's hand began to slip between the folds of his own gold-embroidered toga that Geta stepped in. You averted your gaze and coughed, wiping the purple-pink smears from your mouth.

You could not read Geta. He pulled his brother from the chair and lead him to his own desk, away from you. Flustered, you poked your spoon around in the remains of your porridge. There was little point in eating anymore. You were full.

The afternoon trickled by. Snatches of conversation caught your attention but you made yourself turn away. They were not for your ears.

"Acacius has returned, victorious of course," Geta said. "He does not seem to enjoy it."

Caracalla cackled. "I know someone else who does not enjoy bloodshed."

You looked up. Both stared at you expectantly. "I. . . I am sure the general and I could not be more different."

"Hmm," Geta's mouth twisted in thought. "He has requested time to spend with his family."

"You have granted him this?"

"No."

You could not hide the disapproval on your face quick enough. Geta barked a laugh, surprised. "What are you thinking?" he leaned forward in his chair. "Really, I must know."

"I am thinking I am not fit to advise an emp -"

"Not advice, then," Geta dismissed your concern. "Amuse us."

This could get me killed, you thought. Then again, was there anything that couldn't? They could have you taken out and thrown to your death if they felt the slightest inclination. Your mind wouldn't let you forget it.

"I think," you said slowly, "that the general would appreciate the rest. His lady wife, too. Perhaps if you let him have this he would be more amenable in the future?"

The brothers shared a look and you clenched your teeth. Was this it? Your death? Your palms were sweaty as you slid them together and rocked on your feet.

"I do not see why we should let him have anything," Caracalla's face twisted. "He and his wife have been given privileges that no-one else has. They have been honored!"

"It wouldn't be for them," you said quickly, "it would be for you. Both of you. You are young; there is plenty of time for conquering. Some rest now means nothing. But it might get you things you want in the future - and rather than having to take them, they would be given."

You stopped, too nervous to continue. You were no advisor. You did, however, have an understanding of most people. Everyone except them.

If you gave something you were likely to get something in return. That, you understood. You had heard things about the general and his feelings towards the conquering he did for the emperors. Rome was already delicate enough. An uprising would shatter whatever fragile ground you stood on and, perhaps selfishly, you did not want that.

"Given," Caracalla echoed, fingers tracing the edge of some papers. "I like to be given things. Sometimes I take them too."

You thought back to the berries, his fingers on your face. He had taken something from you then but you were not sure what.

They did not address you again for the rest of the afternoon. They were entirely focused on their work. This time their voices were lowered enough that you could not quite hear them. It was better that way. You let your mind drift.

You took your meals with the emperors, wolfing them down and avoiding their leers. It could have been your imagination but the food tasted better than what you were used to.

The room had darkened considerably by the time you were dismissed.

"One of the guards will escort you to your new room," Geta tapped his fingers on the desk, "I expect you ready tomorrow morning."

There was an implication in the way that he spoke; you were to go to your room and remain there. No visiting friends in the kitchen or wandering about. They would know if you did.

Geta held out his hand expectantly. You took it in your own, tilting it up to your mouth and pressing a kiss to the back. These were hands that had never seen a hard days work. Hands that were gradually squeezing you tighter and tighter into a position that you did not want to be in. You cleared your throat and stepped back.

Caracalla stuck out his and you did the same. When you tried to pull away Caracalla tightened his grip on your hand. It took several tries to pull away.

As Geta had said, there was a guard waiting to take you to your own room. It still sounded strange in your head. Your own room. You’d never had your own space but you had never needed it more.

The room was distressingly close to the quarters of the emperors. In was just a nook in the wall, really, but more room than you'd ever had before. There was no windows; only a small wooden side table and a straw mattress atop a wooden frame. The guard let you in and then left you.

Your fingers traced the frame. It was simply crafted but unlike anything you had had before. It was sturdy. You sat on the mattress. Comfortable, too.

You stuffed your old tunics and the carving into the side table. Then you noticed a wooden peg jutting from the wall. A place for your new clothes. You hung them up reluctantly, wishing there was somewhere you could shove them out of sight.

This was it, then. You lay back on the bed and smoothed your hands over the sheet. You had thought you might be glad for the privacy. Instead, you were lonely. You longed for Alba and the faces of familiar servants. She was probably somewhere below you, settling down for her own night.

You gritted your teeth and pushed your face into the mattress. There was no telling what tomorrow would bring. You could feel yourself being propelled towards it and braced.

Authors Note - please leave likes, asks, comments & reblogs if you enjoyed, they keep me going!!

As you can probably tell, the emperors will not be getting assasinated in this one. They're still shitty leaders but the events that lead up to their deaths in the movie will be different.

taglist - @only4thefics @doodle-with-rhy @lover-rep-fanfic @claraisme23 @sashaphantomhive @multifandombtch @t6gse370 @merrymunsons @europixie @prestinalove @malfoycassimalfoy @jovial-cowboy

#emperor caracalla x reader #emperor geta x reader #fred hechinger #emperor caracalla #joseph quinn #emperor geta #gladiator 2 #caracalla x reader x geta #gladiator ii #emperor caracalla x you #banners by enchanthings

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codenameregnar · 2 days ago

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Ok so, I've been in the process of writing a post beta canon fic, and a lot of what you've said strikes me as extremely relevant to the things I've been ruminating on in that process. And so bear with me but I'm gonna go through these points one by one, because while I think they all tie into the same central thesis, they are also compelling as standalone points and the worms demand I expound upon them in detail.

"I simply don’t see a world in which that kind of relationship dynamic/approach [of them abandoning their respective worldviews and convictions] would fit with their characterizations." So one of my favorite scenes in A Stitch In Time is the bit where they are having lunch with Odo, and Julian is essentially pushing Garak to (if he would come to be a leader of Cardassia postwar, which we know is exactly what happens) adopt a more Federation adjacent mindset based in democracy and freedom. And Garak gets upset. Irrationally so. And it's because he's on this precipice of great change and understanding within himself, at conflict with his more Hebitian values and worldview vs what he's been taught and brought up to believe in. He is actually very inclined to take a Federation approach for how his world (both his internal world and Cardassia as a planet and people) should be rebuilt, though still distinctly and independently Cardassian—or rather Hebitian, in it's construction and core principals. And coming to terms with the dismantling of his previous principals, ones that have always been necessary for Garak's survival, if ill-fitting, is a terrifying prospect. And so I love that scene, because that is the closest we get to seeing Garak feeling attacked and genuinely shaken up at Julian's convictions and how much they resonate with him. And so in rebuilding Cardassia as a more democratic society (even without losing some of their core and more alien beliefs) that is a middle ground I think Julian could understand and come to even appreciate, especially given his experiences with the Federation's dark underbelly. And let's not forget the central theme of the beta canon, which is Garak remaking himself and by proxy Cardassia in Julian's image specifically. Him finding in himself what Julian saw in him all along and rebuilding his world with who he truly is—with what Cardassia truly is, at the root. And so while I don't think they would be willing to abandon what they believe in for each other, they very much would be willing to shift their worldview to meet in the middle. And furthermore, I think Garak is the one doing the majority of the shifting in that theoretical. Especially given that it's less of a baseless shifting for Julian's sake alone and more of a growing into himself. Something he could only ever have done with Julian's forgiveness, patience, and unwavering sense of compassion and justice to help reveal himself to him. And I think my entire point here is the underlying reason why so much fic and fannon characterizes Garak as the one willing to bend over backward for Julian. He is more aligned to Julian's way of thought (deep down and under years of trauma and brainwashing) than he's wiling to admit in canon.

"there are never any situations involving these characters in which their fundamental values or institutional loyalties are challenged as a result of their relationship." I agree, and the lack thereof is forever a great disappointment, but as illustrated in all of Robinson's writing on Garak, their relationship causes an internal shift in Garak and causes him to see himself in Julian in ways that are uncomfortable and jarring (the same goes for Julian in the opposite direction, I believe) and causes him to question everything he grew up believing, and through that questioning he finds his true values, as he sees them, as indictive to his personhood, without the coloring of Tain's or The Union's influence. And so while there are never any situations which challenge their values, the relationship as a whole does. And again, I do think that is true for Julian, but eons more so for Garak. He does have to chose between Cardassia and Julian, but in a very abstract way. He has to chose between the old Cardassia (that traumatized him and eroded his personhood) and the core of himself that Julian not only saw so clearly but embodied in it's most flattering composition. There is a bit in Enigma Tales in which he ruminates on the way secrets destroy a person, specifically in reference to Julian. And I think that says, without outright saying it of course—in very Garak fashion, that he saw the best of himself in Julian, and he consciously chose that best moving forward, with Julian as a sort of guide.

"their friendship in the early seasons is usually framed as a respite from their serious responsibilities or moral dilemmas." Which is exactly the space Garak needs in order to work through the things I've outlined above. For the first time since his very early childhood he can be unguarded and find comfort��as opposed to paranoia, however mild—in companionship and learn to grow into himself in ways that don't seem very consequential at first (casually saying he "joined the wrong intelligence agency" in OMB comes to mind. It seems like a funny throw away line but given his character and history it is a HUGE admittance of personhood if you read between the lines) but that stack upon themselves to elucidate to him his own values and the harm done to him that snuffed them out over his lifetime.

"[Julian's] righteous anger at seeing those morals trodden upon is one of his most defining character traits" Which is exactly the type of push, in tandem with the aforementioned mirror that Julian is for Garak, that I think he needs in order to come to these realizations about himself. Garak has always been angry. But he had that righteous anger beat out of him from such an early age, and by the time he could recognize it (the Edosian Orchid assassination saga) he had no choice but to suppress it. To see it so unabashedly on display in Julian is not only invigorating to him, but vindicating too. One of my all time favorite aspects of their relationship and what Julian's friendship does for Garak is that he sees, for the first time, his sentiments ('the greatest weakness') as a weapon to be honed and thus wielded as opposed to a liability, which is what his own have always been for him, precisely because he was never allowed to explore that part of himself and learn how to use them to his advantage as Julian does.

"if we’re imagining them in a long term committed relationship? It wouldn’t be sustainable, and it doesn’t feel in keeping with Bashir’s character that’d he have endless reservoirs of patience and understanding specifically for Garak." But he would be vastly more patient and understanding, simply for the fact that he sees Garak, down to the bones, and he understands (especially after that novel length letter) the depths of Garak's internal conflicts. And (if he would come to Cardassia after reading such a letter) he would see that he is trying. His reservoir of patience wouldn't be endless of course, but it would be extended simply for the fact that he and Garak have lead such similar and parallel lives. The main reason they like each other so much is because they see themselves in each other, even if they're not exactly sure why at first. It's an immediate if inexplicable and intrinsic understanding that they have upon meeting that they are looking at another person who maybe doesn't fully understand them, but has the life experiences that equip them with the capability to.

"one very fundamental thing they have in common is how passionately devoted they are to their respective causes [...] I don’t see any version of Garak in which Cardassia is not his first love" Cardassia is absolutely his first love, and even after this internal shift that takes place in him he would never compromise or sacrifice her for Julian or anyone else. However, because of what Julian has been able to give to him—this painful rebirth of the self—he is the perfect person to understand what is necessary to lead Cardassia into a new and generative age. And so in helping Garak, Julian has been able to serve Cardassia as well, and in the capacity that it needs most desperately postwar. He shows Garak the need for one person to fall out of line in order to reinstill the fundamental core beliefs of the First Hebitians as applied to Cardassia's modern age, thus saving—if forever changing—the Union which his love for is defining. And so, in that framework, they can come together for a common goal: healing Cardassia. Garak wouldn't be equipped to do so without Julian's support and guidance, continually reminding him of who he really is and who he needs to honor moving forward. And so to me that is the most believable basis of them getting together postwar. They are both following their convictions and respective life paths, but in ways that they would never be able to without each other.

"For Bashir, there’s the problem of not only reconciling himself with what Garak has done, but also of choosing to be with someone whose impulses and entire cultural belief system places duty and institutional loyalty above personal feelings. And for Garak, there’s the fact that the most devoted and emotionally intense relationship he’s had in his life thus far has been with Tain, who embodied Cardassia for him" And I think here is where the most potential for conflict lies. Garak, and of course Cardassia by proxy, is still in that process of a painful rebirth. He is learning that having the permission to explore one's personal feelings and even act on them can be more generative to the individual and thus to the state than not. But he still has a lifetime of deeply ingrained understandings that tell him otherwise. And so, as his relationship with Tain mirrored his relationship to himself and his devotion to Cardassia, so does his relationship with Julian, but in a fresh and utterly inverse way. This is all still very new and at times very scary for him, and so I think he would need Julian's continued guidance and support so as not to fall back into old and safe patterns of thought and behavior. So to me, the central conflict between them post beta canon would have more to do with the two of them questioning if Garak really is capable of change, if he even wants to change, and what that change would actually look like. I think that, by the time Julian would go running off to Cardassia, he would have a fundamental understanding that Garak is trying, and in order to have even the inclination to go he would have had to already reconciled who Garak has been with who he is becoming/always had inside of him. The discord arises out of questions as to whether or not that internal shift in Garak is sustainable and if Garak can successfully break a lifetime of conditioning.

I feel like this has gotten a bit rambley on my end, so I hope I've been making sense. And I know this has all been very Garak POV skewed and that's my own brainrot and identity talking, and as with all headcanons and interpretations of media feel free to completely disregard everything above if that doesn't jive with what you see in their dynamic, but tldr: to me Garashir is about Garak learning how to find the things that were stolen/beaten out of him and how to honor his own personhood through the at times uncomfortable but always understanding mirror that is Julian Bashir. And through that lens I think them coming together post beta canon is a lot more understandable and fitting for Garak's character (as it's him doing more of the growing and concession making, imo) than is initially illustrated in canon. This coming together wouldn't be Garak abandoning his ideals for Julian's sake, but rather growing into his own long held if deeply repressed convictions that he is only able to see and embrace because of Julian and his own firm belief structure.

I’m trying to untangle The Problem of Garashir (not the least because, well, I’m writing the pairing) -

and I think honestly one of the biggest… roadblocks? bits of untapped potential in the pairing? is that we never really see their relationship put a strain on their ideological convictions.

Which is to say, “the societal institutions we’re subject to are corrupt, but our love is pure, so we’re going to abandon those institutions for each other�� is, whether implicitly or explicitly, a common framing in fanfic featuring them (such as I’ve seen) - and to be fair, it’s a common romance trope in general. But I can’t say it works for me for these characters. And part of that is that imo the show doesn’t sufficiently set that up with its development of the relationship between these two characters, but another part of that is that I simply don’t see a world in which that kind of relationship dynamic/approach would fit with their characterizations.

To address the first point - there are never any situations involving these characters in which their fundamental values or institutional loyalties are challenged as a result of their relationship. At no point does Garak, for example, have to choose between Cardassia and his affection for Bashir. (I’ve seen people read The Wire that way, but I don’t think the reading works - The Wire is a fantastic showcase for Garak’s worldview and value system and the cracks and contradictions therein, but even though Bashir’s unwavering commitment to helping him despite what he’s done is certainly unprecedented and moving to him, his underlying value system hasn’t changed by the end of that episode.) And while Bashir’s faith in Starfleet and the Federation does get rocked quite a bit over the course of the show, it’s never because of his friendship with Garak.

Instead, I’d say that with some exceptions (like The Wire), their friendship in the early seasons is usually framed as a respite from their serious responsibilities or moral dilemmas. This especially true of Garak, who is likely not used to someone simply enjoying his company with no ulterior motives whatsoever, but the narrative maneuvering of the show also does a lot to shield Bashir from the reality of who Garak is. Yes, he gets a taste of that in The Wire, when Garak goes out of his way to impress upon him what the reality of his life as a spy truly was. But that’s still only verbal testimony, and only confined to what Garak has done in the past. Bashir is largely absent from all the shit that Garak pulls during the show!

And I’m not complaining that, say, the events of The Die Is Cast take place between Garak and Odo, because it makes thematic sense for it to be Odo for that arc. (And I love that friendship.) But Garak and Bashir do not get a plot like that, or like In the Pale Moonlight, where Bashir is directly exposed to or complicit in Garak’s immoral behaviour. The closest we get to an actual serious ethical clash between them is in Our Man Bashir, which is a goofy comedy episode. (And it’s worth noting that Bashir calls Garak’s bluff and shoots him in that confrontation! Yeah, he likely missed on purpose, given what we later learn about his magic hand-eye coordination, but he’s still unwilling to compromise on his heroism for Garak’s sake. It’s actually a pretty Cardassian gesture, which is probably part of why Garak loves it so much, but it does say a lot about where their priorities are re: their commitment to their values vs. each other.)

And I think the lack of more serious, plot-relevant ethical conflict between Garak and Bashir is a real loss for the show, because one thing I find really interesting about their relationship is that - in contrast to the examples of Odo and Sisko up there - Bashir is the person in the cast most able to hold Garak accountable. He’s repeatedly established as one of the most firmly moral members of the cast, and his righteous anger at seeing those morals trodden upon is one of his most defining character traits in the later seasons. His unconditional forgiveness of Garak in The Wire is lovely, and it is an important moment in the development of both their relationship and Bashir’s character. But in the long term, once we get into actual serious, consequential war and espionage plots? And if we’re imagining them in a long term committed relationship? It wouldn’t be sustainable, and it doesn’t feel in keeping with Bashir’s character that’d he have endless reservoirs of patience and understanding specifically for Garak. And it’s precisely because Bashir is uniquely able to grant Garak forgiveness that he’d also potentially be uniquely able to chastise him.

(This is why, by the way, my headcanon as to the in-universe reason why they don’t seem as close in the later seasons, paternity deathbed reveals and occasional flirty bantering notwithstanding, is that Bashir was seriously fucking pissed at the stunt Garak pulled in Broken Link, both in terms of the personal betrayal and the destructiveness towards sentient life, and that it created a significant rift between them.)

All of that is to say - my biggest regret with the show’s sidelining of their dynamic isn’t the fact that their relationship never becomes romantic (not a chance of that in the 90s, and also these writers were pretty terrible at writing romance) but that they never get to have an argument. An actual serious, non-flirtatious, two-sided, genuinely-angry-at-each-other-argument. I want to see conflict! (I honestly think that their exchange in What You Leave Behind comes the closest to the kind of conflict I’d like to pick up on in post-canon fic - where they are conciliatory in the moment but still have this really wrenching chasm between them, and unresolved frustration as a result of that chasm.)

So as an extension of these thoughts, I actually really like that we’re not given the basis for a traditional “us against the world” style romance plot. I like that these characters are clearly deeply fond of each other and significant to each others’ development, but have other important connections (Garak especially, since despite being only a recurring character introduced through Bashir, he integrates into the broader cast) and other priorities besides each other.

Furthermore, despite the significant differences in their value systems, one very fundamental thing they have in common is how passionately devoted they are to their respective causes. For Garak, it’s Cardassia. And while his idea of what it means to serve Cardassia, and what Cardassia needs, undergoes a lot of change over the course of the show, I don’t see any version of Garak in which Cardassia is not his first love. For Bashir, it’s altruism and helping people, as well as his intellectual curiosity - aims which are reflected in Starfleet and the Federation for him but ultimately higher ideals.

And I don’t think either Garak or Bashir would admire the other nearly as much if they were willing to let go of everything they hold dear for the sake of romance. They’re both far too committed to being a part of the world. Garak may have some fun with trying to shake Bashir of his optimism, but ultimately Bashir’s goodness, his fierce conviction that no one deserves to suffer, are among the most compelling aspects of his personality. And if Bashir is ever going to actually enter a serious relationship with Garak, he’s got to move beyond flirty intrigue and literary banter and see Garak as someone who’s proactively committed to goals that Bashir can respect. If they’re coming together as a couple, it’s because their aims and beliefs have come into alignment in some way.

And to be fair, a lot of post-canon Cardassia stuff is doing the latter. But I also want more… conflict within that framework, I guess? I don’t want a romantic relationship and the act of getting together to be the endpoint of whatever reconciliation of values they need to work through. And that’s part of what I’m trying to untangle in planning this fic of mine - especially regarding how fraught romantic commitment feels for them. For Bashir, there’s the problem of not only reconciling himself with what Garak has done, but also of choosing to be with someone whose impulses and entire cultural belief system places duty and institutional loyalty above personal feelings. And for Garak, there’s the fact that the most devoted and emotionally intense relationship he’s had in his life thus far has been with Tain, who embodied Cardassia for him - and as a result, I doubt he quite knows what to do with the possibility of a serious relationship with Bashir, who is very emphatically not Cardassia. He’s not used to being divided in his passions!

It’s not that I’m never capable of being moved by post-canon stuff that involves Bashir being charmed by how slippery Garak is, or them generally being quippy and fond of each other (I’m not made of stone here). But I’m never satisfied with just that, because that escapist element never feels like it translates well from the early seasons of the show to post-canon, and because it never engages with what I find the most fascinating about what’s set up with their whole dynamic. (And I especially dislike it when it feels like Bashir’s character is getting shortchanged in terms of his complexity and moral convictions being excised in order for Garak to get everything he wants.)

#yea. like I said Ive been ruminating on the idea of julian healing cardassia by healing garak. and how the fate lines demand that he end #up on cardassia. not purely for garaks sake. but for cardassias. this fic is huge and the themes have been crushing me but i find that read #of their relationship and the cosmic weight of it so compelling. and like op said them getting together for the sake of just wanting to isn #quite enough for me and requires a bit of suspension of disbelief. so in my mind they would both have to feel that their union is not only #supported by their convictions but in service of their convictions as well.#but yea. i think that by coming to the understanding that they both need to buckle down and make this work. not just for themselves but #for an entire planet. it could work. but absolutely not without strife. self discovery is always painful. however love really is enough.#not necessarily on its own merits but because it gives you the incentive to do the hard unfun work of healing #anyway. yea if i think about this much more right now i will get a nosebleed im sure of it.#regnarposting #garashir

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rafesheaven · 2 days ago

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ive been thinking about doctor!rafe a little too much but it’s okayy bc I lovee him!!

I see this w sugar (bc she’s so me) and ive been thinking about that time you said that rafe is a multitasker and he would be rubbing your clit without even realizing it while watching tv…😵‍💫

mayb sugar had been needy all day and she’s sitting in between Rafe’s legs and she’s being really whiny and needy asking him for attention while he’s on the phone w one of his coworkers and it gets to a point were he has enough of hearing her whine that he reaches his hand in her pants and starts rubbing her clit until she cums over and over and he’s talking on the phone like nothing is happening.

also hiii my Shania babbby!! how are youu??!! it’s snowing where I am and I loveee you

hi my dolly baby !! i'm okay, just freezing cause it was also snowing where i am >_< i love you moreeeeee <333

poor sugar would be trying to get his attention the entire night cause it was supposed to be their night, but instead, rafe is busy on the phone with a co-worker, talking about god knows what.

"rafe..." you whined for what seemed like the millionth time, "not now, babydoll, 'm on the phone," he gave you a stern look. "you've been on the phone for a while...maybe i should just go home," you frowned, starting to pull yourself away from him. his hand slid around your waist, pressing on your tummy to pull you back into his chest, "i didn't say you could go anywhere."

"maybe if you paid attention to me, then i wouldn't wanna leave," you whined. rafe rolled his eyes at your antics, his hand slipping down to dip into your shorts, pulling your pretty panties to the side. a soft moan spilled from your lips when his fingers reached your sensitive bud to rub soft circles. rafe carried on his conversation over the phone, snickering to himself; all it took was him rubbing your puffy clit, and you were already melting into his touch.

your eyes fluttered shut at the sensation, your moans getting louder, and you grasped onto his forearm as his fingers circled your clit faster. "what was that?" his co-worker asked on the other side of the phone, "s'nothing, just a scene playing from a movie," rafe chuckled, tucking his phone between his ear and shoulder, reaching around to shove his fingers into your mouth to keep you quiet.

#𝒎𝒂𝒊𝒍 ✶ ࣪˖࿐#dolly ;༊#moots <3 #sugar!reader #dbf!doctor!rafe

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dunmeshistash · 1 day ago

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ive always wondered if milsiril's overprotectiveness of kabru was less because of infantilisation (although she def like all elves has that problem) and more so out of guilt. she was a captain of the canaries during the Utaya incident I believe and she witnessed what happened and she couldn't stop it. and she left the canaries because of it and took in the kid who was the Only survivor, raised him in extreme comfort so he'd never see the horrors again and didn't want him anywhere near the dungeons! like i think learning self defense for defenses sake would have made her hesitant but she would have obliged but because it was specifically for the dungeons she was so against it. also like he must have had a rough few years dealing with that trauma as well which doubled her protectiveness

I believe it's a mixture of both, I don't think you can really take away the guilt (actually unsure if that's the best word to describe it) nor the race relations from how Milsiril sees Kabru.

I am the Milsiril apologist ™ but the fact she see's Kabru as a child even now is a big part of their relationship, she's a mother that can't grow up (both for being an elf and for her own issues) and that has to cope with her children outgrowing her fast

Putting a read more cause as usual when it's about Milsiril I talk too much

We can see in every way Milsiril acts that she sees Kabru at most as a toddler during his time with her, she's hand feeding him, has him in a room full of toys and talks about him like he's a cute baby.

I think people are too mean about this side of Milsiril tbh. I think it makes her interesting and it's clear (to me at least) that she does her best to provide for her children even if she doesn't truly understands them. Even in that first interaction with Kabru where she's trying to hand feed him they were *already* training with swords beforehand.

Milsiril also talks to Kabru in a way that kinda seems to expect him to understand more than what a small child would like we can see in the AB extra

So her infantilization doesn't extend to underestimating him at least, rather I think that's how she shows affection (which is still bad 😭)

Anyway, about her trauma with the dungeon and guilt (or maybe shame? Fear?), I do think that was one of the motivations for her to take Kabru in as I said in this post (beware I am a Milsiril apologist and I am VERY biased in seeing her in a more positive light, doesn't mean it's true) but I think that side of her manifests in her sudden switches from crybaby mom to ruthless master

Milsiril is very emotionally unstable from what we can see, she's really trying to convince Kabru not to go into dungeons and when tears don't work she switches into training him so hard he'll give up on his own. I've seen people call this her "true colors" or say she was using "crocodile tears" but in my opnion both the tears and the threat are genuine, I don't think it's a planned switch but rather the fact she's unstable to begin with, both the crybaby mom and the scary swords master are her true self.

Anyway! I think both guilt and infantilization are intertwined in her love towards Kabru, I've said this before but she's a flawed caretaker in a world where she does not have the resources to become a better one. She's traumatized she's depressed and she's an elf, but she's the only one (that we know) willing to at least *try* to treat the people she cares for the correct way. If it wasn't for Milsiril Kabru would have been raised by elves like Rin was (and we know that went very bad, they traumatized her), and Mithrun might not have received the proper rehab he needed to go back into the canaries (He might have managed but we see Milsiril put in the effort to help him cope besides being the one to tell him about Utaya)

That is all to say: Milsiril is still flawed!! It's part of what I love about her, and it's the reason so many people dislike her too. I'm saying this cause sometimes when I go on my Milsiril rants I get asks putting down Kabru to raise her up and that's like, very uncomfortable lmao. Even if she did her best he still was the one that to deal with all of her shortfallings while being raised and he's still the one responsible for getting to where he is, she just made is easier than it could have been.

Disclaimer as is usual for my Milsiril posts: I'm a Milsiril fan, my interpretations of her are very charitable because I often see people being way too uncharitable about her. Please read the original material and make up your own interpretation, this posts only contain what I think it's relevant for my point not an objective view of the whole. I've also already made several posts about her and I don't want to keep repeating myself so if you think I glossed over something important that's probably why.

Edit: thinking more about it, maybe rather than feeling guilty herself she might blame "elves" as a whole for the failure in Utaya, it does say she left it "in disgust". It's not that clear how she feels about it.

I still think it's shared trauma though, I don't think it's possible for Milsiril to not have been affected by what happened there and I think it's part of why she doesn't want Kabru to go to dungeons again. But her way to cope is to turn away from it (and blaming "elves" might be part of how she copes) while Kabru's is to face it so it doesn't happen again

#Milsiril #dunmeshi thoughts #dungeon meshi spoilers #putting an extra disclaimer this time cause sometimes I feel like people are reading dungeon meshi thru my blog

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lexieloo28 · 3 days ago

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HAPPY S1 FINALE EVERYONE!!

OK CINDERELLA BOY NATION SOOOOOO

NOW THAT I CAN FINALLY POST THIS MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAH I HAVE SOME THEORIES/ COMMENTS ON STUFF AFTER EP. 61

SPOILERS AHEAD IF U HAVENT READ IT!

SERIOUSLY YOU'RE NOT GOING TO WANT TO GET SPOILED FROM ME. PLS GO READ PUNKOS AMAZING FINALE FIRST!

Ok so throw back to Ep. 56

When bronze entered the book and only encountered that rustling. He himself states that either Buddy/Nox wasn’t there, or left the book.

The rustling in the bushes could have just been ambience ORRRR Buddy/Nox could have spotted him and left quickly! Bronze would recognize him right away, so it TOTALLY makes sense that he would leave. However, he didn’t show up at all when Deacon was Ridin’ Solo. So he probably either has a direct link to Silver, or Chase himself. If Violet is linked with Silver, Buddy/Nox prob skedaddled the moment he saw our peanut butter boy.

The book shown in EP. 61 shows a bunch of lines and junk (including Buddy/Nox's moon) with Violet's key presumably in her spot? Which could connect her to Silver? Idk

Another thing, I’ve been thinking about :

What role exactly Buddy/Nox has... When Chase first wakes Silver in Ep. 9

We can see here that Chase says purple key and villainess and Silver confirms. I saw someone in the comments mention that he has the moon on his back to mirror Goldie, so maybe he is the villain key? Like, for masculine roles while Violet is for feminine roles. He does mention that he’s never been the hero…

Some more food for thought,

Look at how sad he is here in Ep. 13 :( Chase has no idea that he’s saying that to a fellow key who probably knows Silver better than Chase does.

A few panels earlier Buddy/Nox calls her an “it” so I wonder if he was somehow turned into a key after they were separated, and never met her? Or he could just be throwing Chase off. He seems genuinely surprised when Chase tells him off.

And Next,

This episode had me thinking of Buddy/Nox bashfully asking Violet to make him outfits for each story LOL. I love when we get peaks into his shy personality. He has a snooty persona he keeps putting up, and I hope in season two we get to see him show more genuine pieces of himself :’)

(Ep. 40)

Now, discussing some moments from the actual episode 61 (and ofc I freaked out for a Hot Minute after The Reveal) I wanted to share a bit of a “haha” moment where this image

Did not in fact make me freak out. For the right reasons. I went “WOAH VIOLET IS SO BIG”

…

I was so shell shocked from the kiss that I didn’t even CONSIDER that Buddy/Nox is TINY 😭

And then we get to see more of his facade crack as he sadly reminisces after the kiss. Not a cute moment like Chase, but a realization that he’s fallen deeper than he should have. And it’s getting in the way of his goals. Their goals.

And finally,

Looking back at some of the other episodes, Buddy/Nox lets himself indulge in Chase sometimes. When he calls him a little idiot, strokes his hair, tries (badly) to idk seduce? him. Its making my mind RACE! Was he aware of his feelings? Did he look forward to seeing Chase in the books? Did it give him a sense of normalcy and make him feel human again? Did he feel a sense of dread when he realized that he likes Chase, or chose to ignore the reasons he shouldn’t and let himself indulge? Or push his feelings deep down and not once mention it to Violet?

Punko, you are a LEGEND I cherish this webtoon SO MUCH.

SO GLAD I CAN FINALLY POST THIS IVE BEEN FROTHING AT THE MOUTH RGRGAGGR

#it’s going to be hard for me to refer to him as Nox #I’m so used to buddy!#but it feels soooo good to have a name :’)#sorry for the long post #I have some more to say so I might reblog it with more #but it’s 2 am and I need to sleep so #^ I've edited it since then but know I typed most of this right after I read the episode at like 2 am fr #and i WILL reblog it with more easter eggs #Cinderella boy #buddy #Nox #Chase #stargoth #webtoon #art #Punko

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mcytegg · 2 hours ago

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does anyone remember the time 4c said smt abt not just wanting to better the server, but how he wanted to better its people. or am i just saying words, making shit up, etc etc

#lifesteal spoilers #im thinking abt the exploited hearts #all of 4c's secrets. how he logs on the server off the stream even during his subathon.#how 4c is so cagey w his secrets that it makes people feel like theyve learned a lot when he admits to one or even hints at one #despite him only ever revealing what he WANTS to reveal #im thinking about how focus as a whole has so many secrets; how squiddo knows things abt spoke nd how even mentioning his name #was apparently revealing too much.#and im thinking abt spokes love for playing people like puppets. how he was the one who showed squiddo the bugbombs to begin with #wasnt squiddo the one who took wemmbus immortality thing last season and made it into something else entirely #so she was as close to being in creative as she could be at the very end when she was trying to save jumper?#i feel like this all paints a picture im unable to even see bc ive been blindfolded #idek i just woke up so maybe im just saying words LOL

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ebsmind · 2 days ago

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⏾ MEET ME AT MIDNIGHT | jack hughes x singer!reader smau

summary : trying to struggle releasing a new album and doing press can be too much, are people starting to speculate that it’s taking a toll on your relationship?

warning(s) : break up mentions (poor reader 😕), a couple of cuss words i think idk,

a/n : AHHHH HERES THE FIRST CHAPTER i’m so excited to start this series!! i did create this series around midnight (if the shows fits) and i just knew i needed to get this first chapter out ASAP so here it is!!! im taking each chapter slow and steady since ive never done any type of series before. i also wanted to lyk that each chapter is named after a song but most won’t have a lot of correlation to the songs! also ik jack isn’t in this one (spoiler sorry) but he will soon! i promise i have a vision 😋 i hope yall enjoy and i love you!

series masterlist

liked by taylorswift, gracieabrams, vincedunn and others

ynuser surprise! Midnights out on october 21st! 🌌💜✨

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user1 OMG OMG OMG ITS HAPPENINGGGGGGG

user2 CLAIMING LABYRINTH

taylorswift So proud of you my little bird!! Thank you for having me featured on an amazing album 💜

❤️ by author

user3 sweet nothing is def about vince 😋

yourbestfriendsuser she put blood, sweat, and tears into this!!! ya'll better not do her dirty EVERRRRRR

| ynuser clock it

user4 the album cover EATSSSSS

user5 DOES THIS MEAN UR GOING ON TOUR???

gracieabrams OMG (i knew about this for months)

| ynuser the best secret keeper EVER

yourmomsuser So proud you honey!!

| ynuser i love you mom!❤️

user6 taylor being featured on snow on the beach YESSSSSS

user7 KARMA IS MINEEEE

sabrinacarpenter ALBUM OF THE YEAR I FEAR???

❤️ by author

user8 what’s it like carrying the music industry on ur back queen?

| ynuser i need to see a chiropractor immediately

vincedunn 💜💙

on the Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon…

liked by jimmyfallon, vincedunn, taylorswift and others

ynuser kicking off midnights press with the best tv host ever!!

tagged : @/jimmyfallon

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jimmyfallon It was great having you on the show!

❤️ by author

user1 a duo i didn’t know i needed

user2 sweet nothings being the first song written and with vince 🥹

vincedunn sick asf babe!!

user3 i can’t wait another week for this album OMG

user4 why hasn’t she been liking vince’s comments :(

| user5 oh bye that is not our business

user6 her writing all the songs around midnight I LOVE THIS WOMAN

user7 am i the only one that notices that her eyes don’t light up anymore when she or anyone mentions vince???

| user8 oh ur REACHING

liked by yourbestfriendsuser, yourmomsuser, vincedunn and others

ynuser breaking news! Midnights is out now! maybe stay up until 3am for a little surprise!

view comments

user1 I LOVE THIS ALBUM SO MUCH

user2 u took my heart out of my chest and squeezed it with ur bare head with YOYOK

taylorswift Congratulations!! I can’t wait to see you at the Grammy’s this year 😉

user3 crying this is my album

user4 SNOW ON THE BEACH WITH TAYLOR??? EATSSSSS

yourbestfriendsuser TIME TO GET OUR SPARKLY DRESSES ONNNNNN

user5 we want more taylor pls

user6 KARMA IS THE GUY ON THE SCREEN COMING STRAIGHT HOME TO ME 💃💃💃

yourrecordlabel 🔥🔥

user7 bejeweled is THAT GIRLLLLL

user8 wait vince wasn’t at the midnights release party??

| user9 omg they better not have broken up istg

| user10 let’s not spread false information….

user11 THE OUTFITS CHANGES HAHAHA

| ynuser listen…i couldn’t decide

liked by yourmomsuser, vincedunn, _quinnhughes and others

ynuser cats out of the bag!! i wrote an extra 7 songs and created a 2nd version of my album ✨ welcome Midnights (3am Edition) 💜

comments have been disabled

#jack hughes #jh86 #jack hughes smau #jack hughes imagine #jack hughes x reader #jack hughes x you #jack hughes x y/n #new jersey devils #hockey #ebsedits ⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆#ebs writes things!

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dannyboy-writes · 3 days ago

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Just some IV

Helloo!! This is the end of this story! I hope you’ve enjoyed it and thank you so much for all the feedback it had :)

The sunlight coming from the window startled you, and you noticed Natasha standing by it, her back to you.

She had only just woken, or you had grown too used to her slipping out of your arms as you slept.

“Why are you up?” You asked, your voice straining at your throat.

She tensed, then relaxed. “I was thinking.”

“What?”

“It’s late.”

“By the way the light is coming in, yes." It was probably mid morning, Fury wasn't going to like the lost hours. "But you weren't thinking that."

She smiled to herself, turning to look at you. "No, I wasn't."

You stretched your arms and back, still laying down. "What were you really thinking?"

She shook her head, "It doesn't matter."

You weren't satisfied with her answer, but she continued nonetheless, "How's your nose?"

You sat up, “I've had worse."

She sat by you, toying with her fingers. Silent.

"How did you sleep?" You asked.

She sighed, "Fine for a while."

"And then?"

"I keep having nightmares," she admitted, your eyes focused on her.

Nightmares were common in your line of work, you grew used to them. Waking up in a cold sweat, hand in your gun or a knife. Throwing something nearby your hand in a reflex.

"What about?"

She bit her lip, staring at you. At your busted nose, and the stitches they had sewn in your eyebrow. Light violet bruise by your cheek and half your face lit with the sun.

The morning sunlight did wonders in your face.

"You." She let out quickly. "You're in all my nightmares."

You furrowed your brows, "Wha- How? Why?"

"I'm terrified.”

”Of me?"

“For you.” Your eyes were so focused on hers she felt you would pierce through her. “I'm terrified of what could happen to you. Every night I dream something goes wrong, and every night I wake up panting thinking you're gone.

I've had them for so long now. First I thought they would go away, that one day I would just stop freaking out. Then I pushed you away because it was driving me crazy,” she smiled, “And that didn't work. At all. Now I was just worried but at a distance. And then I couldn't sleep anymore.”

You didn't speak.

"The night we fell asleep on the couch was the first real sleep I had in weeks. And that is not a comfy sofa," she chuckled.

She searched in your face for a hint of something, but you had always been hard to read. “Say something, please."

"Why didn't you say anything?"

"I- Thought it would be easier."

You shook your head in disbelief, pinching your nose softly, and you looked up at her.

Her hair fell on her face as she looked downwards some more, so you tilted her head up holding her cheeks. "I never wanted this to be over. It was your call." You put a hair strand behind her ear. "Is that still what you want, Nat?"

Her eyes found yours with determination this time. "No."

You kissed her deeply and she melted into you, desperate for your embrace. Your hands rustling her hair and pulling her closer to you. Not stopping to breathe.

Her nose brushed yours and a pinch of pain went up your nerves, but you swallowed any whine that would come out. Her hands clasped tightly your face, not letting you go.

She pulled closer and closer to you and one movement put her nose too close to yours and you stopped in pain.

"I'm sorry." She stopped to look at you.

“It’s fine.” You caressed her cheek. “I’m more than okay.” You smiled.

“Me too.”

#natasha romanoff imagine #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha x reader #marvel imagine

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mamawasatesttube · 2 days ago

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Do you think Tim ever had one of those moments where once he realised he was bi, he reflected on how he felt about Kon, and realised it was a crush? In retrospect?

HMMM. ive been sitting on this and pondering. and ... kinda?

but the thing to me about tim, his feelings for kon, and his bisexual realizations, is that they are all tied up in one big tangled knot. he's been in love with kon for years without realizing it; he had a crush on kon in his yj days (guy who is constantly going "what is kon's opinion of me. i need kon to respect me and likeys me and think i'm a good leader. for normal reasons" ok tim), but even after he eventually figures out he's bi, he doesn't realize that that's what he felt for kon, because that crush has developed over the years into full-blown adoration, and he... uh... didn't notice.

like, by the time kon dies and tim goes off the deep end and tries to clone him 99 times, tim is head over heels. it's just that tim has not noticed that he's in love with kon at all. to him, it's just - this is normal, right? he has a huge depth of feelings for his best friend, and that's how he's always felt about kon. when he thought he was going to die on apokolips, he just wished he could have reconciled with kon. that's normal for him. that's baseline. right? this is a normal way for a guy to feel about his best friend. and yeah, tim is bisexual, but after ives he just kind of doesn't really seriously date any other guys, because, like... he could, and maybe he goes on a single date here or there, but there's always this little thought in the back of his head that, like, none of the other guys he meets are as hot and funny and smart and kind as kon. man, guess having a best friend who's a 12/10 really just sets his standards high, huh?

like i just think tim's feelings for kon are such a huge part of his life for so long that the actual nature of them and the depth of them kinda just creeps up on him. it happens so gradually and is such a deep and abiding love by the time they're adults that he doesn't notice for a long time. because he's always adored kon, and by the time kon died and came back, tim already knew he loved him so so so much that living in a world without him felt unbearable. the fact that that love turned romantic somewhere along the line? he has no idea!!! he doesn't even know he's bisexual when that happens, so he's just so used to that being "how he feels about kon, his boy best friend" that he takes forever to realize he is, in fact, in love with him.

but yeah eventually he does put together that, ah, he has been into kon for an embarrassingly long time. without noticing. oop! he's going to go sit on a rooftop and brood and wonder if anyone else noticed before he did (most people who know him did).

#answers #ratbastardsblog #timkon #tim #kon #the thing that captivates me about bffs to lovers is that slow melt where like... the love has always been there #it just kind of changes re: the *type* of love. and the attraction. but the love has always been there #it just kinda melts from platonic into romantic and blurs the lines so deeply bc the devotion was never in question #thats my favorite thing with besties to lovers ♥

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linics · 2 days ago

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comforting bllk characters

featuring : i. rin, m. reo, m. kaiser

a/n : hi so ummm im back .!!! did you guys miss me ?? anyways my writers block was HORRIBLE but im recovered now i think. let’s ignore how ooc kaisers probably is because its based off of fics ive seen + edits. i’ll redo it later.

i. rin

as i referenced in the one where they comfort you, rin would be very closed off emotionally. even so, he’s like a fucking book with how he behaves.

it doesn’t take you long to realize just how much the u-20 game affected him. as much as he tried to turn his annoyance into motivation and actually doing something with it, sometimes it would become too much. whether that looks like him overworking himself or lashing out, it’ll always show through.

the most you could do is make sure he stays safe during it. showing up to the field at weird hours, ruining your sleep schedule, just to give him more water and a ride home considering he ran all the way there.

“why’re you here?” he’d scoff, panting slightly from all the work.

“woke up early, thought i’d stop by,” you lied, yes, but it was fine. he didn’t need to know you’d set at least 10 alarms to make sure you’d wake up and stay up.

he didn’t respond, so you just handed him a large water bottle. it was a spare, but it also was the biggest you’d had, so it’d have to make do.

“thanks.” he mumbled, his voice barely audible. the cold barrier that’d been there slowly flexing and melting away.

he wasn’t someone that you could just befriend instantly. every time the two of you hung out, you’d have to prove to him that you were there to stay. it was gradual.

most people gave up after the first couple of times when they realized they were practically back to where they started. that was except for you.

after taking a few sips of the water, he hands it back to you, not wanting it to interfere with his training. you grabbed it from him, then wandered over to the sidelines.

“where are you going?” he asked, though, if you paid enough attention, you’d notice he was anxious. very anxious.

“just over here, i don’t want you to hit me..” you said calmly, trying to lighten it slightly. you were careful to not wander too far from him.

he didn’t say anything to you afterwards, but you noticed the tension loosened again.

even though he wouldn’t let you interfere — which you have tried — he’d still let you care for him. maybe he knew it was because you’d get anxious and blame yourself if he didn’t let you help in some way.

m. reo

he would be anxious. i don’t care if this is ‘out of character’. for the most part, yeah he doesn’t stress much because he hasn’t had much to worry about. but the second he gets stressed out, he stresses, a lot. and because he hasn’t been exposed to much stress, he’s absolutely clueless on how to cope.

he’d be laying in bed — at his desk now? nope, he’s pacing. point being, he just can’t sit still, and god, he won’t stop babbling about nonsense.

“reo.” for the hundredth time, he’d cut you off completely. this was coming from the guy who felt it was rude to type when other people were typing, so you let it slide.

“and then — oh yeah, did you say something?” finally, some recognition.

“come sit down in front of me,” you pat the bed, clearing off the blankets so he could just crawl in. he did just that, sitting in front of you, his back facing you.

“like this?” he was always so hesitant with you. but you just responded in a hum of approval. you carefully started combing through his hair with your fingers, occasionally grazing his scalp and briefly massaging it. his hair was silky and clean.

he became quieter, his muscles slowly relaxing and calming.

“so, you wanna tell me what’s wrong?” you spoke quietly, careful to not ruin the calmness of the moment.

“it’s nothing big—” you stopped in your movements as he said that, and he knew that meant you were displeased.

“okay, okay, fine..” he mumbled.

m. kaiser

okay so.. i feel like now’s the perfect time for me to say i have not gotten to where he is in the manga. um! so what i planned to do for this is write how i think he acts, then correct it later on whenever i do catch up. i think i get him a bit though ?? currently i see him as a self destructive possibly alcoholic man. who takes after his dad who was abusive and an alcoholic, mom wasn’t in the picture. no clue how any of that relates to soccer but sure! i’ve heard a lot that he hits himself / chokes himself as a way of coping (after doing some research it’s for ideas. okay.) so that’s the route we’re gonna take with that. no clue if it’s true or not.

he really didn’t get it. no matter how much he tried, he couldn’t figure himself out. how was he supposed to understand others and beat others if he couldn’t even understand himself? he needed ideas—

was it illogical? yes, absolutely. did it work? also yes.

adrenaline from anything could be put to use to benefit. so, he did the thing he’s done for ages. maybe he’s began to rely on it for too long so he reached to it for the smallest things, he didn’t really care, though.

it worked, and until it stopped working, he wouldn’t stop abusing his body for his brain. it was nothing more than a vessel, anyways.

“kaiser.” even through your voice, his choking movements didn’t falter.

“just fuckin’ stop for a moment-” you were the only person he really let talk to him like that, even though it wasn’t often that you took advantage of it.

it worked enough for him to stop, just for a moment and catch his breath. it’s not like he wanted to pass out, anyways. the second he let go, you grabbed his hands.

“what is it?” he huffed, his voice groggy and rough.

“don’t do that. ‘what is it?’, you know exactly what it is.” it wasn’t uncommon for you to be mad at him or mildly rude, but even keeping it up for this long was abnormal.

“it works, well, it would’ve, if you didn’t disrupt me.” he rolled his eyes.

“that’s not the point and you know it.”

“then what is it?”

there was a silence for a few moments before you just decided to ask outright.

“what do you need help with this time?” you were still a bit petty, but you just hoped he wouldn’t pay too much attention to it.

“doesn’t concern you.”

“i’ll make it concern me. tell me.”

“why would i do that?”

god, was he always this annoying?

“okay, fine, whatever it is, i won’t interfere. how about you tell me, and if i can’t think of a solution by tomorrow, you can do whatever this is.”

there was another long silence as he considered it. it was appealing — all he had to do was tell you, and you could do all the work. the backup was there and it was exactly what he wanted. there wasn’t much time left in the day anyways.

“fine. tomorrow first thing.”

#bllk #rin bllk #rin itoshi #blue lock #reo bllk #reo mikage #comfort #fluff #blue lock fluff #bllk fluff #kaiser bllk #micheal kaiser #bllk x reader

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thewertsearch · 2 days ago

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GT: Well ive thought about it. GT: Even went downstairs to check the great vaulty doodad. GT: And predictably the infernal contraption is nowhere to be found. TT: Well yeah, Jake. TT: That's sort of the point. TT: Thrill of the hunt and all.

Ok, I think I get what's going on here.

Jake's Dreambot is probably the last remaining source of uranium on the entire island, and the AR is turning its retrieval into a game of hide-and-seek.

I'm not sure why Jake hadn't already retrieved this particular chunk of uranium, especially since he has no use for the robot himself. Maybe he was keeping it operational for sentimental reasons?

TT: I thought you liked to manicure the image of a dude who shits his pants over a good adventure. […] GT: I mean i wouldnt put it in a way like that or come out against a solid policy of clean trousers. But yes adventure is awesome. GT: I just prefer the idea of adventures which i can actually win.

Jake's picturing a LIVING GRANDSON SMACKDOWN - and, frankly, so am I. That robot's being piloted by an absurdly advanced AI, and I'm pretty sure Jake doesn't have any combat experience.

Winning, in this case, is shorthand for 'waiting for the AR to take pity on you'.

TT: It seems there is a 76.10395784% chance you are pussying out on me. Are you pussying out on me, Jake?

Now, to be fair, that one would only work if Jake had agreed to this challenge beforehand. After all, you can't pussy out of something you never pussied into.

GT: It seems it seems it seems!!! GT: It seems there is a million percent chance that you say it seems way too much and do it just to sound more like a lame robot from a movie and also probably just to piss me off! […] TT: Have you ever stopped to think that while I may be bound to processes inside the glasses of a real and incredibly cool guy, my algorithms in cognitive totality comprise a conscious entity not far short of the experiential and emotional complexity of a human being? GT: Oh malarkey. GT: YOU ARE A TIN CAN. ROBOTS DONT HAVE FEELINGS.

Jake, it's been sixty seconds since you complained about him pretending not to have feelings.

TT: I do have feelings. And you're shitting on them. TT: It sucks. GT: Oh. GT: Um. GT: Im sorry then if thats the case.

Well, that's something, at least - but I don't think Jake really understands why the AR is offended, so I'm worried it's just going to happen again in their next argument.

How long has the Responder existed for, anyway? Jake seems familiar with his schtick, so he's probably not brand-new - but at the same time, Jake's surprised apology makes it sound like the AR has only recently started to express feelings.

Maybe the AR has existed for years, but hasn't been sentient for years. Like, it really did just start as a primitive response script, but Bro kept uploading more of his personality onto it, until it slowly began to think and feel. Fascinating idea, I have to say.

GT: It can just be difficult to drum up sympathy for a program that presents itself as an impostor so often. GT: Maybe if you werent so ready to insist you were the genuine article all the time? Or didnt make it so confusing for me… GT: I think it would be best if we henceforth treated you as a totally distinct… uh… THING from my buddy.

Hey, it's not like the AR can stop imitating Bro. Even if he wanted to have his own identity, he's currently bound to the response script of someone else's Pesterchum account. When he talks, he's forced to do it through Bro's handle.

All evidence points to the Responder being a thinking, feeling being with his own inner world - which makes it a little ethically dubious to force him to be Bro's secretary. The guy shouldn't be treated as a bargain-bin Bro, the same way that Davesprite wasn't a backup Dave. We all saw how that ended, and it sure wasn't pretty.

#homestuck liveblog #full liveblog #act 6 #s184 #4191

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tinfoil-jones · 18 hours ago

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Jerk Ford AU: Silliness IV

Jerk Ford's behaviour was way worse while he was in the multiverse because while he was in his own dimension, Stan was there to keep him from going too far, and to mediate his interactions with other people when it came to important business.

Once he fell through the portal? Completely unrestrained.

Here's a small list of some of things he's done across the multiverse:

Un-sunk the mythical City of Atlantis to get back at a 'sh*tty tourist company'

Lifetime ban from all Space Waffle House locations across time and space for inciting a riot because a waitress kept calling him 'honey'.

Had someone legally assigned to permanent Cosmic Jury Duty.

Sowing the seeds of an extremely invasive and fast-growing varient of cucumber all over a large city in the Cat Dimension.

Not giving his two weeks notice at Space Hooters.

Infecting a galaxy-encompassing digital records archive with a virus that changed every third noun to be replaced with the word 'dick'.

Invading a weed farm on a parallel Earth and replacing the 'mother plant' that all of the other weed plants were cloned from with a strain of marijuanna thats identical in every way, except it produces no THC.

Impersonated one of the Bounty Hunter versions of Ford so he could fake his own death, collect the bounty for himself from the Ford Hate Club, crash the party they threw to celebrate, and then slip away right as the real Bounty Hunter Ford showed up to report that he'd failed to capture Jerk Ford.

---

Remember how in a reverse portal what-if Jerk Ford told Fiddleford he would blow up the planet if he didn't help him rebuild the portal? And Fiddleford called his bluff?

Imagine you're Bill Cipher, and an oddly calm Stanford Pines tells you that in three days, he's going to blow up the Nightmare Realm with you in it.

So you laugh, because he's bluffing.

Two days later, it turns out he wasn't bluffing about blowing up the Nightmare Realm with you in it.

He was bluffing about giving you a third day, because he's a jerk like that.

---

Boss Music? This guy isn't much of a fighter, he isn't a boss fight. It isn't hard to finish a fight with him because he's impossible to beat in a hand-to-hand fight - he isn't very strong compared to most versions of Ford Pines- it's hard to finish a fight with him because he's slippery. He's just going to escape and run if he doesn't think he can win.

If I were to give him a theme song or something, it'd probably be Dangerous by Jorge Rivera-Herrans. Mostly because of the "I have to get home" sentiment.

You have to ignore the fact that he didn't actually get himself home, just like canon Ford his brother had to fix the portal to bring him back.

Bro was at least trying to get back home.

Here's a Jerk Ford Playlist by @tearosepedall

---

Actually, the reverse portal scenario doesn't go quite the way you think it does.

Jerk Ford has to pretend to be Stanley. A school teacher. A resident of society that Gravity Falls actually loves. When he's been an active menace to society his whole life.

Stanley gets shoved into an unforgiving multiverse full of monsters, demons, aliens, and versions of his brother who project their resentment and anger towards their actual twin onto him instead as a proxy.

And they both ask themselves: "What would my brother do in this situation?"

Anyways, this is what happens with Stanley:

And this is what happens with Jerk Ford:

---

Fun fact: Jerk Ford is the reason there's no gnome queen.

While he was studying the gnomes during his researcher years in Gravity Falls, he discovered that the Gnomes only had one female, who was their queen by default.

Anyways he talks to her about how her greatest ambition in life shouldn't be having a hundred husbands and being barefoot and pregnant forever. No, her greatest ambition in life should be being one of the greatest hat models the world has ever known.

Anyways now she lives in New York, she may or may not also be a drug lord in the pixie dust cartel.

Soos, Mabel, and Dipper tried asking the mail box questions once.

It sent them a really long, angry, rambling letter starting with "What the f*ck did you just f*cking say about me, you little b*tch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals,"

Later on Dipper asked Ford about it, and he reveals that he traumatized the entity on the other side of the mailbox by sending it the question "is your refrigerator running?" every day for almost six years straight.

#Jerk Ford AU #Jerk Ford #stanford pines #ford pines #grunkle ford #stanley pines #stan pines #grunkle stan #gravity falls au #au #bill cipher #nightmare realm

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black-cat-luck · 3 days ago

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Can u pls do Tim and Bruce father son activities ( i love ur writing!!)

YES IVE BEEN WAITING FOR MY TIMMY BOY

༺♡♱⋆🦇⋆♱♡༻

• Tim and Bruce have a very hard relationship. It took a very long time for them to have anything father/son related, and when they did reach that point, it was uncomfortable and awkward for both of them at first. They try, once they get to that point of care for one another, they do try. Tim knows Bruce is trying, and it means a lot to him, so he’s happy to reciprocate, to have this parental relationship in his life.

• Their first father/son moment is after Tim breaks his skateboard. He’s not necessarily upset, it’s just a sight inconvenience, but he’s tired, he’s been really stressed, and this pushes him past a breaking point. Bruce finds him sitting next to the broken board, and wordlessly manages to get Tim to get in the car and go with him. Tim doesn’t ask how Bruce knows what board shop he frequents, or the exact way to get there without directions, but Bruce even goes inside with him, asking questions here and there as they browse, and complimenting everything Tim picks and buys. Tim has credit cards, he has his parent’s money, but Bruce buys it all without blinking before the boy can even try and dig his wallet out of his pocket. It becomes a thing for them, Bruce always finds time to take Tim to the board shop when he wants to go, and always watches him with that same warm smile, just enjoying seeing Tim happy over something a boy his age should enjoy.

• Tim really likes baseball. He doesn’t let anyone know, not since Jack Drake never picked a glove back up or bothered to show up to a T-Ball game after Tim hit double digits. It’s fine, Tim bought himself gear and nets so he could play on his own in his backyard. He stopped playing on a team, and just tossed a ball to himself. He hasn’t had an itch for the sport in so long that when it comes back he doesn’t think twice to dust off a glove and practice his pitch. When Bruce finds him, it honestly makes his chest hurt to see all of the things the boy owns, to see how long he’s spent alone. There’s an extra glove, Tim always had a few of everything. Bruce is a bit rusty, but he’s adamant to make sure Tim never feels alone again, to know he has a home and a father that will play catch with him. Tim cries himself to sleep that night, and Bruce promises he won’t ever be alone again.

• Tim’s one true love is always photography. When he feels secure enough with his relationship Bruce to show him, Bruce is a bit horrified to know such a small boy was hiding on rooftops just to sneak pictures of him, but it’s a bittersweet feeling to know that little boy was so starstruck, that he adored Batman so much, and if Bruce would’ve known about him before, maybe he could’ve met Jason, maybe Tim could’ve had a father sooner. Bruce takes him to museum’s that have traveling photography exhibits, some with local artists getting displayed. Tim admits a few are his he submit under a pen name, and Bruce makes sure those photos are displayed permanently. He encourages Tim to never give up or let anything ruin his love for his art. Bruce spends early mornings and beautiful middays with Tim, watching him in his own element, more so than Robin, or an act put on for the elites, Tim Drake is a photographer.

• Tim likes to crochet. It started as a small hobby he learned from hours of watching his mother do it, he was always nervous to try himself, but when the nights got lonely he did it as a way to feel close to his parents. He fell in love with it and Drake manor is covered in all kinds of colorful creations of his. He has his own crocheted Batman sweater that he made before merch of the vigilante ever existed, and he still wears it happily. Bruce thinks it’s adorable, and Tim’s first ever gift to him, is a matching one. Bruce adores it, and wears it all the time around the house, and Tim continues making him things. Sweaters he can wear in public (which he does happily), a plush Robin bird that sits above the batcomputer, a tiny Alfred to keep him company when he’s having a hard day. He even makes Alfred small versions of Bruce, and all his kids. He gets a hug, and sees both of them cry when they’re given them. That Christmas everyone is given matching sweaters, and Bruce happily sits with Tim as he crochets, encourages him to pick up his needles when he’s getting antsy during a debrief, or watches him tiredly twist the yarn around his fingers as he waits for Bruce to fill out the mission report before they’re allowed to go to bed. Tim tries to get Bruce to crochet with him, but it becomes a bonding time for them to just sit together, and Bruce always compliments everything he makes, just happy to be with him.

• Tim likes to make cakes. He thinks they’re fun, and there never needs to be a reason to enjoy something delicious, so when they’re both benched for a week after a rough mission, Tim drags Bruce down to the kitchen, and makes him help make one. There’s no occasion, no reason. Tim just wants cake, and he wants the enjoyment of making one. Bruce is just happy to spend time with him, and helps with every step. Tim makes the frosting himself, and shows Bruce all the different shades of colors they can make by adding certain amounts of food coloring, so they can have four different shades of pinks and blues for the cake. He’s almost too good at it, like he is with everything, and Bruce feels bad he’s making it look bad, his cursive is sloppy in frosting, and no matter how he holds the spatula, the border is still lumpy, but Tim thinks it’s perfect, and refuses to let Bruce stop helping. It’s a bit messy, leaning a bit to one side, but Tim loves it. He takes pictures, and lets Bruce cut the first slice, smiling wide as they share the piece, commenting on how good it tastes, and how perfect it is because they made it together.

• When Tim has to move on from Robin and become his own person, it undeniably puts a strain on their relationship. They try not to let it, but Tim needs time, and Bruce allows him it. Tim can’t find enjoyment in making cake, or playing baseball by himself anymore, a dreaded feeling that he finally knew how it felt to really be loved, and lost it. He’s still a kid, he’s on his own again, he’s too prideful to be the one to make the first move. A box is left on his doorstep, his Robin training says not to trust it, but the way his name is written, in cursive that it much better on paper than a cake, he finds a small plush bat inside. It’s lopsided, messy crochet barely holding together. It’s from the same tutorial that taught him how to make the plush Robin he put in the cave for Bruce. Batman needs a Robin, he always reminded him. Bruce needs his son, he was being reminded. And Tim knew no matter what, he needed him too. Tim never expected to find a family among the manor and the people he now loved that were inside. He never imagined he’d get to have this relationship, because no matter what, Bruce showed him what it felt like to be loved by a father. Bruce didn’t just love him as his son, Bruce loved him as Tim Drake.

༺♡♱⋆🦇⋆♱♡༻

Tim my beloved I want to give him the entire world

Thank you so much for requesting I hope you liked it!! Thank you for loving my work, I hope you enjoy all my future writings just as much. ᡣ𐭩

#dc batman #batfam #batman #batman and robin #good dad bruce wayne #bruce wayne #dc headcanon #red robin #red robin headcanon #tim drake #bruce and tim #dc robin #robin tim drake #blackcatluck request

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