#ive been sick for the past couple days too | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

jedi-hawkins · 6 months ago

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Flowers for the Doctor

The Clones all deserve flowers! Or maybe they think you deserve flowers 😉 Either way, love is in bloom this week for the Clone Flowers Fic Event!

Throughout this week, May 20th-25th, certain participants will be posting their own fics of Clones and different flower themes that were selected! The participants as well as the Clones and flowers they will be writing for are listed below and links to each fic will be added as they are posted! 💐 Follow the tag #cloneflowerficevent to see them all as they come!!

Event Masterlist

@arctrooper69 - Tup, Rex, Gregor

@photogirl894 - Hunter, Wrecker, Fives

@nahoney22 - Fox, Tech

@totallyunidentified - 99, Cody

@dragonrider9905 - Hardcase

@l-lend - Wolffe

@moonstrider9904 - Howzer

@eyecandyeoz - Waxer

Make sure to go check out their entries too, we'll be posting throughout the week!

Pairing: Kix x f!reader

Chosen Flower: St. John's Wort

Word count: 3.8k

Rating: PG-13

Warnings/Notes: Medical terminology, pandemic, sickness and death, brief suggestive content, friends to lovers

Beta-read by @anxiouspineapple99

The helmet of your hazmat suit hisses as you release the seal. A deep sigh passes your lips as you step out of your suit and hang it on the rack for decontamination. When you open the door to the decontam stalls, the creak echoes around the tiled room.

'Damn. All this and we can’t even get some WD-40 on the hinges?' You think to yourself before stripping down to your skivvies and stepping under one of the spouts. The doors from the infectious disease ward open again and a friendly face steps in.

“Kix.”

He smiles at you as he strips down to his briefs and steps under a spout. “Long day, Doc?”

You can’t even muster a reply as you close your eyes and hit the red button in front of you. For just a single moment, the rest of the hospital fades away with the roar of the sonic waves washing over you, and then it’s over.

“That good, huh?” Kix notes your response, or lack thereof.

You shake your head, trying to keep it together. “I’ve had better.”

Kix holds the door to the locker room open for you as you step through. “At least you don’t have to wear the clone kit all day.” He says, tossing you a pair of clean blacks from the cabinet. “On the battlefield it’s great, but here I bump around like a pinball. I’m lucky if I can make it through the day without breaking anything.” He jokes, trying to lighten the mood.

The corner of your mouth does twitch a little. “I don’t know.” You respond, “I’ve always thought I looked like a hutt in those hazmat suits, and the gloves are so annoying.”

“Dinner?” Kix simply asks.

“Please.”

He leads the way to the hospital cantina. You met Kix just a couple weeks ago, but the two of you had become fast friends. He was a clone medic, sent to your planet to help in one of the hundreds of makeshift ‘hospitals’ that had popped up in the wake of a pandemic. This particular hospital was housed in an academic campus, shut down because of the spreading illness.

Normally, you were the second in command in the biggest hospital in the planet’s capital, but for the past month your days consisted of random converted buildings, biohazard suits, and patients you felt like you couldn’t do anything for. At the end of the day, you were thankful Kix had been stationed at your hospital.

Though you two were usually preoccupied with your own patients throughout the day, the pair of you could usually be found together on your breaks. It felt like Kix truly saw you and your struggle. Sure, the hospital Medical Director was the top dog, calling the shots, but you were the one in the trenches of the Infectious Disease Ward every day.

This pandemic was an enigma that you just couldn’t figure out. It should have just been the normal yearly wave of Wet Lung, easily managed by some general antibios, but those didn’t work. Then your Medical Director ordered you to move up to more aggressive drugs, so you did. Before you knew it, your patients were on IV drips of the most aggressive antibio cocktail you could think of.

And they still weren’t getting better, in fact, they were getting worse. You’d already lost a number of patients to sepsis, blood poisoning, and the other hospitals across the planet were facing the same issues. As far as you knew, any person that had caught this mysterious strain of Wet Lung were either dead or dying and there was nothing you could do about it.

You nearly bump into Kix when he stops to open the cantina door.

“Coruscant to Doc, are you okay?” He asks, guiding you through the door with a hand on your lower back.

You shake your head, trying to clear it. “Yeah, Kix. Just a long shift, you know?”

He squeezes your shoulder before grabbing a tray and heading to the serving line. Even though the Republic had brought the war to your Planet a few months ago, you had to admit their support was needed for this pandemic. And nobody knows how to feed the masses quite like the GAR.

Kix immediately starts eating when you two sit down, he told you about one of his brothers, Fives: 'If you didn’t eat quickly around him, he’d swipe the rest of your rations.'

You just can’t bring yourself to eat, instead you just chase a few peas around your tray. Of course, Kix notices.

“Jahaal'got.” He says, using your nickname to grab your attention. “Come on. Talk. It wasn’t just a long day.”

You avoid his eyes, the words getting stuck in your throat. You’ve lost patients before, multiple in one day even, so why was today crushing you so badly?

Kix sets down his fork and reaches across the table to gently grasp your chin between his thumb and forefinger, forcing you to look at him. “How many did you lose today?”

You take a deep breath, “Twelve, eight more deteriorating. I just… I don’t get it, Kix. What are we missing? The drugs aren’t working, they keep going septic before we can catch it, and those that haven’t progressed to sepsis are dying to the Wet Lung.”

Kix stops your rambling by taking both your hands in his. “You remember what your nickname means, right?”

You should be able to remember, but your mind has been so overworked, it doesn’t come to you. “I, uh… something about medicine?”

“Jahaal’got.” Kix repeats it. “It’s the mando term meaning 'good for health', because that’s what you are. You’re doing everything you can, and that’s all you can do.”

You nod, closing your eyes and rolling your head to try to release the tension in your shoulders.

“You’re off tonight, right?” Kix asks.

“No,” you shake your head. “I picked up the night shift, I have to be here.”

Kix scoffs at you. “Are you serious? What, you’re just going to sleep on the hospital floor forever?”

“Not forever.” You protest. “Just until this blows over.”

“This pandemic or the war?”

You meet his eyes, and a knowing look passes between you. After meeting him, you had discussed sending in an application to become a civilian medic for the GAR.

“Well, we have an hour before the night shift starts.” Kix says, standing up and taking your tray. “Why don’t we go for a walk and then try again at this ‘food’ thing before going back to work?”

Your brow furrows at his remark, “But you-”

“Will also be working the night shift, so it seems.” He cuts you off. He shifts both trays into one hand and holds his other out to help you out of your seat.

Kix leads the way, dropping the trays in the wash basin on the way out of the cantina. Outside, the sun is beginning to set, painting the sky with shades of orange, pinks and purples.

The two of you walk through the academic campus, chatting about nothing in particular. Kix asks you a few questions here and there about the buildings you all pass. Though it’s been a few years, you tell him what you remember about studying here.

“It’s a shame all the students had to be sent home.” You remark as you step into the university greenhouses.

Kix nods his agreement. “What is this place?” He asks, looking around.

“The campus greenhouses, they're shared by a few departments.” You explain. “Biology, horticulture, environmental studies, and engineering to name a few.”

“I’m surprised everything is still alive, don’t plants take some maintenance?”

“Well, the greenhouse forms a pretty self-sustaining environment. I remember the medical students coming in here a couple times.”

Kix tilts his head at you. “What would medical students study in here?”

“Well,” you shrug, “There are quite a few medicinal plants native to this planet. Though they aren’t quite as effective as modern medicine, they can still be used for daily management or as an additional treatment.”

The two of you weave through the greenhouse aisles for a few more minutes before you notice Kix has lagged behind. When you turn around to find him, you notice he’s hiding something behind his back.

Your eyes narrow. “What do you have there, Kix? It’s not a bug, is it? That was only funny the first time.”

He chuckles, “Haha, no. I promise it’s not. Here, one last thing to brighten your day.”

You freeze when you notice what he has in his hand.

Kix notices your expression at the small yellow flowers he’s holding out to you. “What, are they poisonous or something?” He asks hesitantly.

“No,” you shake your head smiling as you take them from him. “It’s just funny, those are St. John’s Worts.”

“Weird name.”

“It’s from local mythology.” You explain. “The flowers tend to bloom on the summer solstice, which is dedicated to their namesake.”

Kix looks from you to the flowers and gently picks a few more sprigs from the nearby planter, tucking them behind your ear. “They’re pretty, like something else I’m looking at.”

His words make you smile, but you playfully swat at his arm. “Oh stop it. I know I look like hell.”

“You look better than anyone else would after nearly a month of non-stop work in an infectious disease ward.” He responds.

“Thanks Kix.” You say, hoping that your sincerity projects. Before you know it, you’re throwing your arms around his neck.

Kix falters, but only for a second. You feel his arms wrap around you, strong and steady, just like him. Just like he has been for you the past few weeks. Maybe it was his clone conditioning, or maybe it was just him, but he seemed so unshakeable and he always knew what to say.

He doesn’t relax until you do, but his hands remain on your hips, his eyes darting across your face, trying to read your thoughts. One of your hands rests on his chest, the other still on his shoulder. You won’t deny how drawn you are to him. Though you hoped for the end of this mystery illness plaguing your planet, it stung that it’s end meant saying goodbye to Kix.

Kix is shifting. ‘He’s leaning in, why is he leaning in?’

You move as well, but the moment is shattered when your foreheads bump into each other.

Kix lets go of you completely and takes a step back, color spreading across his cheeks.

“I uhhh…” He tries to find the words, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Uh, it’s fine.” You stammer. “You’re fi- we’re fine.” A giggle slips past your lips at the awkwardness.

Kix breaks into some nervous laughter as well before readjusting some of the yellow flowers in your hair. “Tell me about them.”

You smile at him. “Well, they’re perennials, meaning they come back every year, they don’t need to be replanted. Although the flowers are yellow, they’ll stain your fingers red when you crush them. They’ve been shown to have some antidepressant properties as well as anti-inflammatory benefits, but you need to be careful when combining them with modern drugs.”

You notice Kix’s soft expression as he listens to you.

“It’s been shown that St. John’s Wort has antibio and antiviral properties as we-'' Your heart stops. “Kix.”

“What?”

“Kix, that’s it,” you repeat. “That’s why we keep losing them. We’ve been treating this Wet Lung with antibios, but those aren’t working because it’s not bacterial.”

Kix’s mouth drops open and he says the words at the same time as you. “It’s viral.”

You can see the thoughts tumbling in his head. “And because we advanced to use the system-wide drugs, the patient’s are too weak to fight the virus, triggering the sepsis.” He stammers out. “But, wait, that can’t be right. How can it be viral? There’s never been a case of viral Wet lung reported on this planet.”

Your feet move automatically as you start pacing. “‘There’s always a patient zero. Normal trade is scanned and sanitized.” You stop. “The troopers.”

Kix’s brow furrows. “No, we're vaccinated.”

“Yes, but vaccines aren’t a foolproof plan, with a mutated strain it might present as a mild cold, or not even show symptoms, especially since you all are engineered to have a more robust immune system.” You say, your brain moving a klick a minute. “Where were you all stationed before being deployed here?”

“Most of the 501st was on shore leave on Coruscant.” Kix replies, shaking his head. “The Carnivore and Execute Battalions… They were on Rhodia and transferred directly here for the occupation.”

His eyes widen and he grabs your wrist without another word.

“Kix? Kix!” You shout as he drags you through the campus back towards the hospital. “Why is it so important that you were on Rhodia?”

“Rhodia is one of the native planets for viral strains of Wet Lung.” He pants. “The Rhodians are largely immune, but some mutated strains survive. You were right, we had a couple troopers reporting colds when they transferred.”

The doors to the Infectious Disease Ward bang open and Kix finally lets go of your wrist, giving you a moment to breathe.

“Like you said, the troopers, we’re engineered to have stronger immune systems and we’re vaccinated.” He continues. “The population here…”

“We never have.” You finish his sentence. “We don’t have any kind of immunity. Combined with your theory that it’s a mutated strain and the antibios we’ve given them, it’s no wonder-”

“WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS?”

The two of you turn and see the Medical Director storming down the nearby hallway.

Kix steps partially in front of you and stands at attention. “I’m sorry sir, but we-”

“I don’t care what you two were doing!” The Director booms. “You bursting in here is no excuse.”

You slowly step out from behind Kix. “Please, sir. We think we’ve figured out this pandemic.”

“I don’t know who you think you are, but I’m in charge here.” The Director says, his eyes narrowing.

Instead of bowing away as usual, you stand your ground. “I am just as qualified as you, if not more. I'm the one that's been running this ward while you sit in your office. I graduated from this very campus, top of my class and I’m the second in command at the Capital Hospital. This disease we’re dealing with, it has to be viral.”

Your Medical Director looks you up and down, pausing at the yellow flowers in your hair. “There has never been a case of viral Wet Lung reported on this planet. The antibios always work. We just need to find the right combination of meds.”

“Sir, you need to listen.” You insist. “I know we’ve always treated Wet Lung with antibios, but look,” You wave your arm at the ward behind him. “Every single patient that’s come in is either still sick or has progressed to sepsis. The other hospitals are reporting the same.”

Kix puts a comforting hand on your shoulder. “She’s right, sir. Strains of viral Wet Lung are common in other systems. We had a couple battalions transfer here from one of those systems, Rhodia. It’s likely some of our troopers were carriers for a mutated variant and brought it here.”

You pick up where Kix left off. “Even though our population doesn’t have any innate immunity, a fair amount of people probably could have ridden out the virus if we hadn’t given them those antibios.” You bite your lip before continuing. “Those drugs are effective, but in a patient with no bacterial infection, all it would do is compromise their system. They can’t fight the virus, and they progress to sepsis. Only we’re not catching it before it kills them because the Wet Lung is masking the sepsis symptoms.”

You try to stop the words from spilling over your lips but in a last desperate plea for your officer to understand, it slips out.

"We’re killing them."

Kix’s hand squeezes firmly on your shoulder as you let out a choked sob. Your medical officer looks at you curiously, you’ve always been so level headed and sure footed.

The Director crosses his arms. "So you’re telling me to take them off the drugs and do nothing. You do know that’s how we treat viruses, right?"

You lock eyes with him. “That’s exactly what I’m saying. We need to give them supportive treatment; fluids, steroids, pain medication. We can try some antivirals to weaken the Wet Lung strain, but the patients will have to fight it off on their own. All we can do is give them the best chance possible.”

Your director looks you up and down before letting out a little ‘hm.’ He glances behind him to the infectious disease ward and back to you. “I will not take responsibility when this goes wrong. Looks like we’re taking your direction now, Doctor.”

Under your instruction, all of the patients in the ward are removed off the antibio cocktail. Much to your Medical Director's annoyance, the death rate begins to improve. You sent word to the other hospitals caring for pandemic patients and they saw similar results. It’s a slow process, and Kix stays by your side every step of the way. The day you discharged your first survivor, you cried. You both did, actually.

It takes a few more weeks, some patients are touch and go. There were still a few deaths, and Kix held you as you cried for them. Then came the day that you got the news. Your patient numbers had reduced so much your little makeshift hospital was going to be closed, and you were being sent back to the Capital Hospital with a new position, no less. Your remaining patients would be transferred along with you and the University was going to be reopened.

And yet, you weren’t quite happy. Sure you’d basically saved your planet’s population from facing extinction, but you couldn’t revel in it knowing that a certain someone was going to be shipped out.

“The campaign here is over.” Kix had explained. “And with the pandemic contained, there’s no reason for the medics to stay behind.”

The 501st was being sent to Ryloth. You knew there was a crisis brewing there, and you were proud that you knew some of the brave men going to help there, but it still stung. It stung the same as your eyes did as you stand on the landing platform, waiting for someone to come say goodbye.

“There you are.” He says, walking up behind you.

You sniff slightly, trying to keep tears from pricking at your eyes. “Here I am.”

You hear a bit of laughter and you notice a group of clone troopers in blue armor across the landing platform that seem very interested in the two of you.

“Don’t pay attention to them.” Kix says, moving in front of you to block them from view. “Brothers…” He mumbles.

“I get it.” You say, searching his face, what for you’re not quite sure.

Kix reaches for a pouch on his belt. “I- I have something for you.” He says, sheepishly pressing a box into your hands.

Looking down you realize it’s a jewelry box. Gently you open the lid and gasp at the sight of what lays inside. Strung on a delicate chain is a single golden pendant of a flower. The same flower that Kix had tucked into your hair all those weeks ago. The same flower that led to the salvation of your planet.

“Kix… I don’t know what to say.” You stammer.

“Don’t say anything,” he says sweetly. “Just turn around for me.”

He takes the necklace from the box and gently brushes your hair out of the way before clasping the chain around your neck. Turning back around you can only shake your head and smile at him.

“I have something for you too.” You say.

Kix looks at you a little puzzled, he hadn’t seen you holding anything.

“They’re naming the new wing of the hospital after you.” You explain. “It’ll be like you’re always here. No one will forget what you did for us, for me.”

Kix gingerly cups your cheek with one hand. “It was an honor and a privilege.”

He’s leaning in again.

This time your lips connect and the landing platform melts away. There’s nothing but him. Him and you.

Of course your heart has to ruin it as it sinks with the returning thought that he’s literally about to leave and never come back. You break the kiss, but he keeps your foreheads pressed together.

“What is it?” He breathes.

You can’t help but scoff. “You’re leaving and we’re kissing. I doubt the GAR will give you much time for visits.”

“Hey,” Kix says gently holding your chin between his thumb and forefinger. “It’s like you said, I’ll always be here, jahaal'got. I will admit I should’ve kissed you sooner.”

“Hey lovebird! It’s time to go!” One of his brothers shouts.

That manages to get a laugh out of the two of you.

“I think you have to go.” You mutter.

Kix lets you go and takes a step back. “There’s one more thing, but it’s waiting in your office.”

He turns to leave, but you reach out and grab his bracer. “Kix. Thank you. For everything.”

With a smile, he leans in to peck you on the cheek before turning and jogging over to the shuttle where his brothers are waiting.

A grin spreads across your face when you see one with shoulder pauldrons wrap his arm around Kix’s neck to give him a noogie, while another with a top knot of hair claps him on the back.

The sun is setting by the time you get back to your office. The door slides open with a gentle woosh. It’s a nice space, though somewhat empty as you have yet to move most of your stuff over from your old office. On your desk is a vase of small yellow flowers. You find yourself shaking your head again as you walk closer.

Kix… when will he stop absolutely melting your heart?

When you didn't think he could surprise you any more, you realize the flowers in the vase are ceramic. Tucked in between some of the delicate blooms is a notecard. You instantly recognize Kix’s swooping handwriting.

‘I think I need to make an appointment with the Doc, I seem to have been bitten by the love bug. (augh, that was awful, Jesse told me it would be good) I hope you like these, you deserve real ones, but had a local artist make them for you since I won’t be around to make sure real ones never wilt. I’ll see you soon, jahaal'got, on my next shore leave.’

Also Happy Birthday @arctrooper69! (today, May 20th)

#cloneflowerficevent #clone trooper kix #clone medic kix #star wars tcw #tcw #the clone wars #star wars the clone wars #clone wars #sw tcw #tcw kix #kix #501st #501st legion #kix x reader #st. john's wort

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lime1991 · 11 months ago

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those mlp infection aus on tiktok have been alright but heres my idea to consider:

the main characters of the au are the cmc. theyre not the lone survivors, and heres why: the infection almost entirely affects adults. this is just like a book i read in 5th grade, thats where im stealing this from.

Applebloom is the self appointed leader, shes best at foraging for food and growing it as well as building re-enforcements for the shelter (which is the clubhouse. it's higher up so they dont have to worry about most infected ponies reaching them.)

Scootaloo is the defender of the base as well as the group in general. shes the one who handles the weapons and is first to sacrifice herself for her friends to get to safety. She says its because he doesnt want to hold them back due to her disability, they tell her she doesnt have to think like that. but its hard not to.

Sweetie Belle is... not all there. sometimes she forgets the apocalypse has happened and that most of her loved ones are dead. Scootaloo and Applebloom take turns sleeping during the night to make sure someone is always lookout. that, and they can't risk Sweetie Belle unknowingly walking into the dark trying to get home.

Partially inspired by one of the best animes ive ever seen: School Live, Scootaloo and Applebloom sometimes, when Sweetie is having an episode, pretend everything is normal. Is the most they can do for their friend, who is clearly so traumatized that her brain blocks out the reality of their situation. Sometimes, Applebloom wishes that could happen to her.

When the infection started, it slowly took over the elderly first. Granny Smith got sick, fast. Big Mac and Applejack took care of her, but only a few days later she would turn into some kid of monstrous creature. Big Mac did the unspeakable act of putting her out of her misery.

Sweetie Bell was sent to go live with Rarity while her mother was sick. Her father began to feel ill too, and didn't want her to get herself and her friends at school sick as well. She could hear over the phone the conversations her sister and father had. How mom was getting worse, how dad was getting worse. How they stopped calling altogether.

A couple days into the widespread sickness, Scootaloo's aunts took a trip to the store to stock up on groceries just incase a quarantine was issued. They were gone for hours. They were gone for days. They never came back. Eventually, Scootaloo traveled outside of her home by herself, and could never return.

Once Big Mac and Applejack started showing signs of illness, Applejack spoke to cousins in other places wondering if they would be able to let Applebloom stay with them a while. But just like everyone in Ponyville, they were experiencing the same issue. At one point, Fluttershy agreed to watch Applebloom until AJ and Big Mac started to feel better.

After hearing that Fluttershy graciously took in Applebloom, Rarity sent Sweetie Belle off to her the moment she started to cough. She didn't want Sweetie to see her like that. She didn't want her to get sick either, and in fact, she probably transported it from their parents house and into Rarity's. That made Rarity angry. Her last words to Sweetie were about how upset she was that she'd brought the illness to her.

Scootaloo went to Fluttershy herself. She couldn't find Rainbow Dash, so she settled for the next best pony. She was shocked to see her friends had been there themselves the past few days. Scootaloo only managed to stay a few hours, because during the night the crusaders awoke to a crash in another room. Upon investigation they saw Fluttershy hunched over a broken glass. There was blood on the floor.

They went to comfort her, but she wasn't herself any longer. When she turned to face them it already looked like she'd been ravened by the infection. She was so hungry. Why couldn't the jar just open? She was so... hungry. Before she could even stand back up, the crusaders grabbed their things and fled to the only place they knew they'd be safe. The clubhouse.

#my little pony #mlp #mlpfim #mlp infection au #applebloom #scootaloo #sweetie belle #cutie mark crusaders #infection au #apocalypse au #ive made myself giddy thinking about this. i need to draw up some concept designs.

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butididntpourthewhiskeys · 4 months ago

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🤍 SAFETY II 🤍

Two kisses are being placed on her shoulder, right on top of the soft fabric of her shirt, slowly wandering down to the sleeve and finally landing right on the warm skin of her naked arm. She can smell his aftershave already, way before having opened her eyes. She loves to smell him when she wakes up, loves to feel with all of her senses that he’s right there, right with her. His scruffy face presses a few more gentle kisses onto her arm and she can hear him whispering his good mornings onto her skin. His big hand is securely placed around her torso, right on top of the white hotel bed sheets. She groans slowly, her head pounding like she was hit by a truck. For a split second she feels unable to remember what is going on? Why does her head hurt like this? Why is she so nauseous? Why is there an IV drip attached to her hand? Suddenly, these dark thoughts cross her mind again. He told her last night. He told her what happened.

Even though she feels as weak as she barely has before, Taylor forces herself to open her eyes once. She needs to wake up. She needs to wake up to speak to Tree, to solve this situation, to make sure no one has witnessed her in her unconscious state. With half open eyes, Taylor moves quickly, almost panicky and looks down confusedly to the man in bed next to her. He’s fully dressed, freshly showered, just casually lying on his stomach right next to her. His arm still wrapped around her body, his thumb stroking gently over the fabric of her blanket. He can’t help smile at her gently. Her hair is curly and quite literally everywhere. She’s got the same grumpy look on her face as per usual when he has to wakes her up. She’s never liked getting up. No matter what time of the day it is.

“Hi.” she mumbles, her voice rusky and still full of sleep. It makes Travis smile quietly.

“Hi beautiful.” he says, moves closer to her to press a gentle kiss onto her lips. She barely moves her face and he’s unsure if she’s too tired still or uncomfortable kissing him without having brushed her teeth yet. He couldn’t care less about these things, but he knows she does.

“How are you feeling?” he asks then, moving his face closer to her cheek again to leave a kiss there.

“Horrible.” she groans, closing her eyes again for a moment. She’s been awake for less than five minutes and already feels exhausted. She takes a deep breath, hoping it will cure her upset stomach or the head that feels like exploding. But it doesn’t help. Of course it doesn’t.

“Headache?” he asks gently, reaching for her hand to intertwine with his. She’s got her eyes closed again, just nods quietly. And Travis hates it. He hates seeing his girl as sick and weak as she is now. In the past year of loving this woman, he’s not seen her like this at all. Taylor is full of energy and life. Probably has more energy than most people he knows. But seeing her like this, and knowing that another person is the reason for it, makes his blood boil in an unruly way. He knows he most likely broke this guy’s nose last night. But if he could, without consequences, there’d be far worse things he’d do to him.

His thumb is drawing gentle circles on her hand and he doesn’t rush her waking up again. Instead, he just stays right there next to her, watching her drift off again slowly. And it’s quiet between them again. The kind of quiet he’s never been able to enjoy with anyone else. But with her, it’s different. With her, silence doesn’t have to be a form of insecurity. There’s pure clarity between them. Nothing but love, support, honesty. He loves sitting in silence with her, because it reminds him that besides all the earthly things he loves about her… at the end of the day she’s just the purest little soul he’s ever been privileged to know.

“I need to get up.” she whispers weakly then, her voice whiny. He just shakes his head no, getting closer to her hand he’s holding in his and presses another kiss on top of it.

“We’ve still got a couple of hours until the flight. I just wanted to wake you cause I knew it’ll take a while for you to be alright. Don’t stress about it, baby.” he says, but Taylor just takes another deep breath and carefully tries to sit up. She notices that her hand is still connected to the IV stand next to the bed. Still in disbelief about the events of last night, Taylor just sits up, leaning against the backrest of the hotel bed. She feels dizzy, nauseous. And she can’t believe Travis has to see her like this. She must look absolutely horrendous, that she’s sure of.

“I can call and get someone to remove the IV. The guy last night said it’s a quick job.”

She nods, rubbing her tired eyes.

“Thanks. I.. I really need to go to the bathroom. Can you help me?”

Even before she finished her sentence, Travis has gotten up from his spot next to her in bed. He helps Taylor come to a secure stand, then helps her make her way to the bathroom on the other side of the hotel suite. One hand securely on the IV stand with the small wheels attached to it, the other one holding hers. She’s extremely weak. Just holding onto him with all the strength left in her. He hates seeing her like this, hates to know that he was there when this happened. He was there, but he wasn’t able to protect her.

“Want me to..”

She turns around, shakes her head no.

“I can do it on my own. Some privacy please.”

“You sure?”

“Trav..” she mumbles with slight annoyance in her voice and he chuckles quietly, then respects her wishes and closes the bathroom door behind her.

“Alright sweetie, this is what I got you.” he excitedly places the secured goods on the table at the end of the room. “I got you a full sugar coke with some ice, we’ve got healthy fats in the form of a crispy salmon taco, I got you some chili cheese nuggets, we’ve got some fries and some Gatorade, of course.” the tall man proudly stands there, holding the brown fast food bags up in the air after having just returned from his lunch food run. Taylor, who just got out of the shower, just walks past him and sits down on the side of the bed with her hair dripping wet and her body covered by nothing but the big white towel.

“Babe, this is very sweet but I literally just threw up an hour ago. I can’t eat.”

“I know, but you heard what the doctor said. You need to eat to actually feel better. Just try some of it, you don’t have to eat it all.” he mumbles while unpacking the food bag. She doesn’t answer him and it forces him to look back at her in confusion. He doesn’t like what he sees. She just sits there on the side of the bed, her chest rising up and down.

“Hey, you okay?” he asks worriedly, dropping everything around him to sit down next to her. Just like a reflex, his arm is now wrapped around her wet towel, the other one resting on her naked thigh.

“I.. I think the hot shower was.. just a lot.” she mumbles, her face pale and still breathing heavily. He sighs, feels his throat tightening again. He doesn’t say anything, just moves closer to her. Within a second he feels her head leaning on his shoulder and her small hand finding its natural position on his chest. She just melts into his arms and he appreciates being her harbor in this moment. His head turns around towards her and he presses a few kisses onto her wet but amazingly well smelling hair. His big hand moving up and down her naked arm. She doesn’t move, clearly needs a few minutes to recover from taking a shower and washing her hair. His lips won’t leave her head and he feels himself getting emotional again. This woman in his arms is not just his best friend and greatest life companion he’s ever known. This woman in his arms is his future wife, the future mother of his children, the person he wants to grow old with, the only person on this planet he would sit in the trenches with. He wants to die at ninety years old, right in her arms, while looking into those eyes one last time. He knows worse things can happen. He knows she’s been lucky because she’s got people looking out for her. He knows she’s been lucky because she got the medical help she needed right away. Still, this nagging, stinging, horrible feeling of fear and guilt at the same time won’t leave his chest. He wants to be strong for her. He promised himself and her that he would be. But right now in this moment, holding her wet and weak body in his arms almost brings him to his breaking point. He’s always cried too fast and too much, and it’s something that everyone in his life is well aware of. He’s never felt the need to hide it but in moments like these, he wishes he could stay as level-headed and strong as she needs him to be right now.

His lips continue to press gentle kisses onto her scalp underneath her wet and curly hair. She doesn’t move, just closes her eyes for a moment. How is it possible that whatever drug she was put under keeps making her feel so tired? After a few moments, she then slowly pulls back, looking up at him again. She notices immediately. This giant teddy bear is smiling his biggest smile at her but his eyes are red and watery. She can tell right away he’s been crying.

“Oh baby..”

“Don’t.” he immediately says, already sinking his head, not wanting her to see him like this. “I’m fine. Just a cry baby, you already know.” he jokes but she’s not having any of it. Her cold hands wander to his stubbly beard. She just holds his face in her hands for a moment, then gets closer to him as he is quicker than her, already steels her forehead another butterfly kiss. A tear runs down his cheek, and it breaks her heart.

“What’s going on?” she whispers, her hand now securely on top of his sweatpants on his thigh. He takes a deep but shaky breath, shakes his head.

“Nothing.”

“Talk to me.” she says with a level of gentleness in her voice that always gets him. He swallows, looking into her eyes again. He’s still crying, but he’s trying to swallow it down.

“I just.. I love you.” he says, and by the look on his face she knows he’s never meant anything as much as he means these words. His chin is trembling and it does something to her heart.

“And I’m real sorry for last night, baby. I.. I know I sound like a broken record by now, but this shouldn’t have happened last night and..”

“Trav.” she just says, a big sigh escaping her mouth. “Listen to me.”

Taylor reaches for both of his cheeks once more and lifts herself up to press a big kiss onto his mouth. She can taste the salt of the tears running down his cheek and it moves her. She hates that this beautiful person is crying for her, but it touches her on another level to understand just how loved she is. She always knew that Travis loves her. She knew it from the first day they hung out, right over a year ago. His feelings for her was never anything that was up for debate. But witnessing how badly he wants her to be happy and healthy and well is another form of declaring his love for her that she hadn’t been privy to witness before. She can’t help but smile to herself. This is the kind of love she’s always wanted. This is exactly what she’s always wanted.

“I know this should’ve never happened. But.. I’m okay. I’m okay because you were there. You.. you literally saved my life, Trav. You.. you carried me to my hotel room, you called a doctor for me, you gave me aspirin when I was pretty much unconscious. I still have no idea how you did that.” she giggles slightly and it makes him smile beneath his tears, too.

“You held my hair when I was throwing up this morning. You just got me disgustingly smelly food in an attempt to make me feel better.” she takes a pause, not sure how else to convince him that none of this was his fault. It never could be. He just gets closer to her again, kissing her forehead once more.

“You’re just… magical. You’re the best boyfriend I’ve ever had.”

“Boyfriend?” he says offended suddenly, and she laughs, rolling her eyes while wiping away one last set of tears running down his cheek.

“Fiancé, excuse me. Future husband.”

“That’s better.” he jokes, pulling her closer again.

“It hurts me that you’re so sad.” she adds then, and he shakes his head.

“I’m not sad, baby. I just.. I hate seeing you not being okay.”

“Trav, I am okay.”

“You’re not. You can barely shower without collapsing, you can’t eat, you’re tired and….”

“Baby.” she says, a laugh escaping her mouth. “I’m fine. I’m not made of glass. I get sick, I get tired. But I’ll be okay. Don’t worry.”

He nods, suddenly feels a hint of embarrassed for worrying so much. She’s strong, extremely strong and he never wants to make her feel any less than that. His head is sunk, and he sniffles once more, just nodding. She smiles gently at him, her hand stroking gently through his hair once and then presses a kiss onto his big head.

“There’s gonna be so many times you’ll have to witness me being sick. And I’ll have to witness you being sick. It won’t be fun. But I don’t want us to.. to turn this into a thing, okay? I’ve had a relationship before where our happiness as a couple was dependant on saving each other and you know how well that ended.”

Travis looks into her eyes and nods. She’s absolutely right. He can be there for her, he can take care of her. But he won’t be able to protect her from the world. Even though he would love nothing more than having this power.

“Once I’m pregnant, I’ll suffer so much and you will have to endure all of it.” she says then, a twinkle in her eyes that makes him smile again. “Between Abigail and me, I was always the more cranky one when I was sick. She literally is the most pain-tolerating person I know and she told me countless times that she’s felt like dying in the first trimester. So you’ve got lots to look forward to, mister.” she jokes, another little laugh escaping her throat. He smiles at the thought, nods, lets both their noses touch and then kisses her again. But this time, really. He slowly pulls back after a few seconds, leans his forehead against hers.

“I can’t wait for that.” he whispers against her lips, both his eyes closed, smiling.

“Me too.” she says, moves her nose once more to tickle his. This is the first time in her life that she gets to talk about these things in a way she always dreamed of. It’s not an if anymore. It’s a plan. it’s their plan. And she can’t wait to do it all with him. All of the things she used to be so terrified of. She’s ready to do it all with him. Finally, she’s ready.

“I’ll probably cry every time I throw up. And you’ll have to deal with it.” she giggles at him.

“I’ll cry with you.” he says then and it makes her laugh even more.

“Trav.” she gently hits him. “I need you to be pragmatic and logical when I’ll loose my mind over my hormones. Would be awesome to have at least one person in this house who can think straight.” she jokes and he nods.

“How much more time do I get to prepare? A year?”

She grins at him, nodding.

“You know the deal. No trying for a baby before the wedding. I need good pictures.”

“Alright. But we can keep practicing. Practice makes perfect, I know what I’m talking about.” he jokes, kissing her cheek once more. And he loves to feel her small hand land on his neck. The thought of their future together is making her as happy as it makes him. He can’t wait to take these steps with her. He can’t wait to just live his life alongside this beautiful person.

“Trav?” she looks at him again, her hand tickling his chin gently.

“Mhm?”

“I love you, too. Let’s.. let’s just forget last night ever happened, okay?”

He looks at her, his face a bit more serious than before. He hates that she feels the need to just suppress what happened. And really, this is the last thing he expected her to do. He expected tears, he expected long conversations with Tree and her security team. Not this.

“I’m not sure babe. I’ll try.”

“Good.” she kisses him once more, then slowly gets up to dry her hair.

Travis looks out of the big black car window with the tinted glass. It’s always a surreal feeling to drive across the runway of a commercial airport, especially here in Las Vegas. A few palm trees are still marking the outline of this gigantic airport. The afternoon heat making it hard to see clearly back to the airport halls, the huge building almost almost blurry by the guzzling heat. You never know how gigantic these airplanes really are until you sit in a regular sized car, right in front of one. Travis looks to his right, can see the blonde curly haired woman in her huge sweater, not sure if she’s cold from the AC in the car or whether her tiredness is the reason she had to wear a hoodie at this Nevada heat.

“I don’t think there’s any paps, babe.” he mumbles then, looking out of the window to ensure himself once more that he’s right.

“Yeah, but I still want them to shield me with the umbrella. I look horrific.” she mumbles, her voice still a little rusty. It’s inevitable to see that she’s been through it. She doesn’t even look at him in this moment, is just frantically texting on her phone. Her small Gucci handbag half open on her lap and the other bag with her laptop and cosmetics right between them. Traveling with Tay is something that amuses him every time. She’s always got at least two purses with her, a bunch of suitcases (and of course, she never knows which one carries what), there’s always at least two phones flying around the airplane and it’s never been the case that she didn’t forget something on the plane after. He loves this creative, chaotic but loving woman, even though her lack of travel organization is something that might actually drive him insane one day.

“You look great, what are you talking about.” he just counters her and for the first time since minutes, she looks up from her phone and smiles at him. He loves having that effect on her. He loves how she’s not wearing any make up, loves that she’s more comfortable around him than anyone else in her life.

“I love when your natural curls come through.”

His comment hits her right in the heart.

“I don’t.”

“Well, you should. It’s freaking gorgeous.” he says unbothered, now looking out of the window again. He doesn’t even seem to notice how much these small comments really mean to her. How much her mindset, her confidence, her thoughts, her whole life has changed ever since this has become the norm for her. Someone building her up on the constant. Promises that are kept. Nothing but support and acceptance radiating from him. He loves her. She’s always his priority. Crazy how simple relationships can be.

Still smiling at the big man next to her, all it takes is one look back at her phone screen and she groans annoyedly.

“What?” Travis looks back at her.

“Mom is driving me insane.”

He grins and the car comes to a stop.

“She keeps on sending me more things to pick up before dinner. I thought I can just send Alex to Whole Foods but now she wants us to get wine from that Australian store and pick up Kitty from the salon and.. it just never ends.” she says with an annoyed face, letting her phone drop onto her lap like a child throwing a tantrum. He just laughs at her, already knows that she’ll look for it between the car seats in a bit.

“Does she not know you’re still really worn-out from last night?”

Taylor doesn’t answer him, and he instantly knows why. Instead of answering him, she just opens the car door, asks Travis to reach for her tote bag behind her and manages to board the plane underneath at least four umbrellas without anyone being able to see her face from afar. As soon as she got on the plane she feels her knees going weak once more. She usually makes sure to take her bag from Travis, but this time she just falls onto the seat and takes a shaky breath. How can she be so out of breath from walking a set of stairs?

Travis, who finally enters the plane now notices immediately how pale she is again.

“All good?”

She nods, reaches for the small water bottle next to her and takes a sip.

“Yeah.. just.. got dizzy for a bit.”

Travis just sighs, places her bag next to her and grabs the small carry on suitcase from one of her security guards to place securely behind her seat.

“Welcome aboard miss Swift. Would you like to eat lunch during this flight?”

Taylor looks at the flight attendant of today’s flight crew, smiles politely and ready to decline as Trav starts speaking first.

“I think that would be a great. What do you guys have?”

“Let me give you a menu.” she says friendly and disappears. Taylor just looks at him and rolls her eyes while watching Travis sit down in front of her.

“You haven’t eaten in almost twenty hours. I understand that you don’t want the greasy taco bell I got you this morning but please try eating at least something.”

Just when she was ready to hit him with her prepare speech about how she won’t force food down her throat when she doesn’t want it, the flight attendant steps closer to the two again, holding a menu card in her hand and smiling at the couple.

“Today, we can offer you either a sushi dish with yellowtail snapper, spicy tuna and avocado. We also have Filet Mignon with roasted potatoes and a side salad or the vegetable pasta with truffle cheese.”

“Can I get the Filet Mignon please?” Travis says politely while securing his seat belt, and Taylor sighs.

“I guess I’ll have the same.”

The flight attendant nods and disappears again.

Travis smiles thankfully at her.

“If I’ll explode on this tiny airplane toilet in an hour, then that’s on you!”

“You won’t. You’ll feel better.” he says, his voice has gone all gentle again. He places his arm right over the little table between them, signaling her that he wants to hold her hand. With one hand still holding onto the little water bottle, Taylor places her small cold hand in his, enjoys getting her cold hand warmed by his.

“Now tell me why your mom has no clue what happened last night.”

Taylor sighs. She can’t ever keep anything from him.

“My parents worry so much about me. You know that. I just.. nothing happened so it’s not necessary to tell them.”

“I disagree. I think you need all the support around you right now and hiding it from anyone will just turn this into a dirty little secret, which it really doesn’t have to be.”

“I don’t need ‘support’, Trav. Gosh. I’m not feeling great, but this whole thing will be forgotten tomorrow.”

He looks at her and hates the tone in her voice right now. She’s not just gaslighting him, but also herself. Still, he won’t let go of her hand.

“You were drugged, Tay. Against your will. That’s literally called abuse. And just because that guy didn’t get to rape you after, doesn’t mean he didn’t have the intention to do so. It was still it abuse.” he says in a serious voice that gives her a shiver for a moment. She looks up at him, pulls her hand away. Something in her has shifted and he has no idea why.

“Why do you want me to suffer?” she says then, her arms crossed. For a moment, he has no idea what she’s talking about.

“Excuse me?”

“All morning you act like I almost died. I didn’t. You know how many people this happens to? Some people literally take drugs for fun. It happened to me, it wasn’t great but I’ll be fine. Why do you have to turn this into something bigger than it is?”

“Wow.” he just says, an angry sigh escaping his mouth. He doesn’t know what else to say to her. He understands that she’s not feeling well, he understands she’s tired and annoyed and sensitive right now. That she wishes it never happened. But he didn’t expect her to be so dismissive of his feelings after she’s been so understanding and empathetic just a few hours ago.

“Well, I’m sorry for not being able to move on from this as fast as you can. Just wasn’t fun seeing the person I love collapse in my arms. Lucky you didn’t have to endure that. Would’ve been nice to be the unconscious one in that situation. But hey, next time someone drugs you I’ll just tell myself ‘oh it’s not that bad, some people do this for fun’.” he gets back at her, knowing he sounds more salty than he intended to. But it’s not the end of their argument. She looks angry, ready to say something she will definitely regret.

“You know what? Sometimes, you can be a real asshole.” she says angry.

“Right back at you, sweetie.”

The plane starts moving and she just shakes her head in anger, doesn’t say anything else. Travis looks into the other direction as well, not able to say anything consoling in this moment. He doesn’t understand how she can go from being the most gentle, kind and understanding person in the world to being as cold as this. Making him feel like he’s just a burden. Pretending like his feelings as well as her feelings aren’t valid. He never wants her to suffer. All he wants is to be there for her, to be a good partner. Travis looks at her once more, but she just looks out of the window, plugging her AirPods into her ears. She clearly doesn’t want to talk to him at the moment. And he can’t say he feels any different.

“Tay… Tay, we just landed.” she wakes up, feels Travis gently caressing her arm. She looks around almost as confused as she was this morning, realizes that she must have passed out for a solid amount of time. The last thing she remembers is eating bits of her steak and potatoes while successfully ignoring the man in front of her. She’s mad at him for his comments earlier. Mad that he makes her feel worse about what happened last night than he should. Still, he must have placed a blanket over her when she fell sleep. One of her AirPods must have fallen out of her ears and onto her lap. It seems like she’s had a good nap.

“How long was I out for?”

“Whole flight.” he mumbles, busy looking into his phone. He clearly doesn’t want to talk to her either, doesn’t ask her how she’s feeling, how her nap was or leaning over the table to steal her a little wake up kiss. She hates to admit it, but she misses getting her usual treatment from him. She’s still annoyed by him, but she secretly hates this fight. However, she’s too proud to give in yet. This time, he should be the one to come around. It’s none of his business how she deals with her family. He should help her move on from last night and not make her feel guilty for doing so. She feels disrespected by him judging her for wanting to deal with this in her own way. Especially him. The person who has understanding for literally anyone and anything on this planet.

It takes a good thirty minutes until the plane has arrived in its arrival position and the two have made their way into the car. The drive up to her house is long. Even longer when the person next to you does their very best to not talk to you under any circumstances. She then turns her head once, looks at him looking out the window. He seems mesmerized by the Nashville city sights. The last time he visited her here, they spent their time going on little hikes and just being their happiest selves together. Now, there’s conflict between them. She hates it. Even more than the afternoon traffic they just got stuck in. She sighs, is not sure how to approach him now.

“You don’t need to come to my mom’s dinner with me tonight. It’s just my family anyways and..”

“If you go, I’ll go.” he says.

She doesn’t say anything, just nods and looks out of the window.

“But you’re mad at me.”

“Correct.” he says quietly, and she rolls her eyes. “But it would be rude not to go to a family thing when we promised them we’d be there.”

“I don’t want you to go if you’re like this all night.”

He sighs now, rolls his eyes and lets his head fall against the head rest of the car seat in annoyance.

“What do you want me to say, Tay? Want me to apologize for worrying about you? For caring about your well-being? Just tell me what you want to hear because I don’t get it.”

She doesn’t say anything, feels this new form of anger boil up in her. Before she can stop herself, she opens her mouth a tad too quickly.

“You literally think I’m so weak, don’t you?”

He looks at her in confusion and shock.

“What the fuck? When did I say that..”

“You literally think last night broke me. But it didn’t. You have no idea what kind of scrutiny I’ve endured. Way worse than last night. And it makes me sad that you think I’m made of sugar and not able to handle this. I’m stronger than you think, Trav. And I really thought you would know that. And I’m done playing the part of the broken little girl who needs saving. I don’t need to be saved.”

He just shakes his head. He can feel pure anger radiating from her. He knows that anything he says now will be twisted by her anyways. And he truly hates when she’s like this.

The big black car comes to a stop at a red light. He looks out of the window and in contrast to the beautiful Las Vegas sun, the weather in Nashville today is cloudy. Cloudy and humid. The perfect temperature for a good fight with someone you care deeply about.

“I know you can handle all of it.” he replies surprisingly calm for her taste. “And I know you can probably handle even more. Completely on your own. But I just don’t want you to. That’s all I was trying to say. I’m on your team, if you remember.”

Taylor swallows, not saying anything else.

“You ready?”

Travis is standing in the hallway of her Nashville apartment. He’s checking his hair for a moment, taking a look at the golden rolex on his arm. It’s late. Very late if they want to make a quick stop to pick up Andrea’s dog before heading to her house for dinner. The rest of the afternoon has passed by horribly slow. After arriving at Taylor’s Nashville condo, he’s made his way to the gym and managed to ignore her as much as he could to clear his head for a while. Tay clearly didn’t want to speak to him either, disappeared into her bedroom and pretty much stayed there ever since. When he walked past the open bedroom door on his way to take a shower earlier, he could find her passed out in bed whilst some tv show was running in the background. As mad as he is at her, he’s just glad she’s been able to rest. She needed it. And he can’t believe she’s now dragging herself to a family dinner after last night. She almost got no sleep after being drugged, just got off a four hour flight. But it seems that she was right. She is stronger than anyone he knows. He just wishes she could see that sometimes, she doesn’t have to be strong. Sometimes, it’s okay to admit that you’re worn out and sad.

“Give me one second.” she yells back from the kitchen. With his beige pants and white t-shirt, Travis feels almost too dressed up, which wasn’t even planned for tonight. After all, he wants to be himself around her family. But he had this outfit picked out for her when they left KC two days ago. She loves whenever he’s dressed like this. And she knows how excited she is to share the news with her wider family today.

Travis takes a few steps into the rustic kitchen and finds her standing in front of the huge flower bouquet her assistant has picked up for her. After all, today is her aunt Maureen’s birthday and she doesn’t want to go see her with empty hands.

Travis just stands in the door frame, watches her cut the flower stems while being in her own little world, and he can’t help but feel the urge to just go up to her and hug her from behind. But he’s too proud to just let it go like this. They need to properly talk about their fight, before acting like nothing happened. Still, he can’t help but think about how beautiful she looks. Her curly hair is in a loose bun. She’s wearing a long dress with sunflowers on it and a pair of yellow sandals that match her dress perfectly. He also notices that she’s wearing her engagement ring. A rare occasion of her feeling safe enough in her environment to show it off. It consoles him in a way. As mad as he is, she’s still going to be his wife. They belong together. No matter how bad one of their fights may get.

“Do you want me to put anything into the car?”

“Yeah, can you grab the bag right there? That’s the wine and the stuff from Whole Foods.” she mumbles, still busy fixing the flowers. He nods, was just about to grab the big plastic bag next to her when he notices her stopping what she does for a moment. Instead, she just holds onto the counter in front of her, taking a deep breath. For a second he looks at her, worried. She just let the flowers drop into the sink, isn’t moving.

“You okay?”

She doesn’t answer him. Again, she just takes a deep breath, then nods with a shaky breath.

“Hey, Tay.”

He can clearly see that she’s dizzy, trying to catch herself again. He drops the plastic bag on the counter immediately, walks up to her and places his hand protectively on her back.

“I’m just.. can you get me a glass of water, please?” she says with a shaky voice and Travis nods. Once more, he’s worried. He knew she wasn’t okay. He knows she hates to admit it, but she is not a hundred percent fine. She should stay home and take care of herself. But he’s done telling her that.

“You sit down for a moment.”

With a hand in her back and the other one securely holding her cold and sweaty hand, he helps her sit down on one of the chair around the dining table right next to them. She’s seen the look on his face, knows that he’s worried sick again. And she hates it. She hates having to be the weak one of the two again. A burden. A broken little girl who needs saving.

“I’m just.. a bit dizzy. I’ll be fine in a second, don’t worry.”

Travis doesn’t say anything, just reaches for a glass from the shelf next to the sink, pours some filtered water into it and comes back handing it to her.

“Here.”

“Thanks.” she mumbles, reaches for the glass and starts jugging it down. He notices her hands shaking slightly. He sighs, crouches down in front of her for a moment and places his hands on her knees. She empties the whole glass, then carefully places it on the wooden table next to her. She breathes heavily after putting the glass down, then leans back and relaxes for a moment. Her eyes close for a moment. Travis moves his hands on her knees gently, looking at her with empathy. He knew that going to this dinner was a bad idea. It already is. He reaches for both of her hands now, moving his thumbs up and down for a moment.

“I know we can both be assholes, but you know what? You’re stubborn as hell on top of that.”

She opens her eyes again, looks down at him. She tries not to smile at him, but almost cracks up. And he notices.

“I just.. I haven’t seen my family in a while with tour and everything. I need this. I need them to feel.. grounded. They also haven’t seen my ring yet. I just..”

“I know you want to go, baby. That’s why we’ll go. But just.. just tell me when you want to leave. Okay?”

She nods, a little smile on her face.

“Want some more?” he asks, pointing to the now empty water glass. She nods. Travis gets up and goes up to the kitchen sink again to refill it. She just watches him standing there right by the sink in his cotton pants, looking really presentable for her family. He’s not just handsome today, but the look in his face makes her feel things. She feels horrible all of the sudden. She knows that he worries, and it shouldn’t be something to hold against him. But there’s this anger inside of her. And she doesn’t even know where it comes from. But it’s there. She’s angry at him, angry at herself.

Travis makes his way back and hands her the glass of water. She takes one sip, then reaches for his big warm hand against whilst he just stands there in front of her chair now, watching her finish her glass once more.

“I’m sorry for being a stubborn asshole. But you’re also a stubborn asshole, sometimes.” she mumbles.

“Guess we’re a good fit then.” he replies, forcing a little smile out of her.

“Let’s talk about this when we get home. Don’t want to ruin this night for everyone.”

He nods, allowing himself to look into her eyes for the first time since their fight today. She smiles gently, a little peace offer from her side. She gets closer to him and her smile requests a small kiss from him. He gets closer to her, pressing his mouth onto hers. She feels relieved, intertwines both of their hands for a moment.

“I’ll take the flowers and you take the grocery bag?” she asks him, gets up with his help and already makes her way back to the kitchen sink in which she just frantically dropped the flowers a few minutes ago.

“Yeah, let me get that.” he says, reaches for the bags on top of the counter. Taylor suddenly notices another red bag with the KC logo in his hand while reaching for the flowers for her aunt.

“What’s that?”

“That’s the jersey. For Jett.”

Taylor looks at him a little touched, can’t believe he remembered. Her eight year old baby cousin Jett is a huge Patrick Mahomes fan and asked Travis on Christmas if he can get him a signed jersey. She can’t believe he remembered. Can’t believe that this is how thoughtful he is with her family.

“You remembered? Oh my god, he will be estatic.” she gushes.

“Yeah, got it signed and got him a cap and an autograph as well.”

Taylor smiles at him while walking towards the door.

“Thanks for remembering. It’s so sweet.”

“Hey, this is for my guy Jett, not you.”

She rolls her eyes, but smiles, and leaves the house together with him.

“Oh my god, come here!”

Taylor giggles while entering the house with Travis, two huge bags of groceries and presents, a bouquet of magnolia flowers and one freshly trimmed Dalmatian with them. Taylor can already hear her mom laughing from the kitchen as her aunt and godmother Alison makes her way towards her niece and hugs the blonde tall woman as tight as humanly possible.

“Show me that ring. I want to see that ring right now.”

Taylor laughs, and so does Travis right behind her. He knew that their engagement would be the number one topic of the evening. Whilst Taylor is busy handing the big bouquet to Maureen before showing everyone her engagement ring, Trav just quietly makes his way to the kitchen, passing the grocery bags to Andrea who’s standing by the stove.

“Trav, you are the best. Thank you so much. Come here, honey.” she takes the bags from him, placing them on her marble kitchen counter and pulls him in for a big hug.

“You look good. Did you let your hair grow?”

“I did.” he smiles shyly, when he already feels Scott padding his shoulders from behind.

“Trav, good to see you.” Scott pulls him in for a hug and Travis can’t believe his eyes. Scott is wearing one of the vintage KC crewneck sweater he got him last year. He can’t believe he’s wearing it for dinner with his Eagles supporting family.

“You have just made my day, big guy” he pulls him in for another hug. Just in that second, Taylor enters the kitchen, asking her mom for a vase. Andrea just presses a kiss on her daughter’s cheek and takes the flowers from her.

“Hi sweetheart.” Scott says, ready to hug his daughter but Taylor just looks at his outfit in shock and awe at the same time. Her mouth wide open, looking back from Travis to her dad.

“What do you say about that, huh? He’s officially joined the team.” Travis says proudly to his fiancé, still can’t believe he’s been able to fully pull Scott to the right side of history.

“That’s a statement, dad. How does Andrew feel about this.” she laughs, already looking for her uncle in the living room who will most likely not be too amused about his outfit choice. After all, he still hasn’t digested the 2023 loss against the Chiefs. And Travis being a part of the family now hasn’t really soothed this wound yet. It probably never will. But her dad now also moving to the dark side will definitely not make this better.

“He hasn’t said anything to me all day.” Scott laughs, and so does Trav. He high fives the older man and Taylor just shakes her head in disbelief. It’s safe to say that her dad has never loved any boyfriend more than Trav.

“Honey, where the hell are you? We need to see the ring. Now.” Maureen now yells into the kitchen and everyone starts laughing. Taylor smiles at her mom, who proudly looks at her daughter. Trav watches her walk to the group of women all gathered up next to the dining table, ready to inspect her hand.

The sudden gasp coming from the living room makes the three people in the kitchen laugh.

“Oh my god, darling, it’s huge.”

“Wow, is this a whole ass diamond?”

“Trav, how many carats is this thing? Fifty?” Alison yells back into the kitchen, and Taylor looks back at him and blushes. He smiles at the round of women, even Andrew and Jett just look at the ring in pure fascination.

“Nah, just ten.” he mumbles, walking up to where his fiancé stands.

“Ten?” Andrew asks in shock and now it’s Trav who blushes. “That’s.. what? Half a million?”

“Andrew!” Maureen just rolls her eyes at her husband being so rude and asking Travis how much he paid for Taylor’s engagement ring whilst Taylor is standing right there.

“Maybe. Maybe more.” Trav smiles, placing a hand in Taylor’s back. He can see that she’s in awe again, almost uncomfortable to know that he spent so much money just for her. And he loves that about her. He loves that she has so many good reasons to not be uncomfortable about it, but she is.

“I just wanted the best for my lady.”

Taylor blushes, and smiles at him. For the first time really after today’s fight. She feels him get closer, pressing a gentle kiss onto her head. She leans in to him for a moment and it feels like reconnecting. Even though they had a bad fight today, they still love each other. They always will.

“It’s fine though. Tay needs to buy groceries for the next five to ten years, and my bank account will hopefully recover.” he jokes and everyone laughs a bit, even Taylor.

“I love it so much.” she looks at her ring again. “It’s weird, because every time I look at it it becomes even more stunning. Just.. literally how I envisioned my engagement ring when I was a little girl. Means so much to me. I think it’s because.. like.. I will wear this every day for the rest of my life. Like, no matter how old I am, I will forever have this on my finger now.” she smiles at her ring, then back at Travis. He just reaches for her hand with her ring and kisses her hand gently. Her aunts surrounding her just smile at the two of them. But beneath all the giggles and laughs of her aunts, Taylor hasn’t missed her dad’s look from the end of the room. Her dad, mom and Austin have seen the ring before. But his watery eyes, his little smile, and how he quickly left the room to not get too emotional right now hasn’t remained unnoticed by her.

“Alright, who wants a drink?” Andrea calls from the kitchen and the little crowd surrounding Taylor and Travis slowly dissolves.

She still smiles at her ring one last time, and Travis notices. He quietly smiles at her too, then leans in to press his lips against her bangs to kiss her once.

“You are still a stubborn asshole, but I love you.” he whispers, and she giggles as he walks away to get himself a drink.

Travis stands right next to Austin, trying to focus on their current conversation about their favorite childhood movies. After Austin made him the best Christmas present ever last year, in the form of his favorite DVD, the two of them really connected on their taste in movies. And he enjoys connecting with her family, getting closer to them and understanding more and more why she loves them so much. It’s gotten dark outside now. The beautiful, if cloudy summer day slowly coming to an end. He struggles to focus on Austin talking, feels his eyes every so often wandering off to Taylor. The majority of her family, including her, are sitting outside on the patio around the big family table. Andrea has lid up candles all over the terrace and it couldn’t be cozier around the house right now. Taylor definitely has her taste for interior design from her mother. Andrea is the only other person he knows who can instantly turn a place into a home. By making it warm and cozy.

“Austin, Trav, do you want red wine or white wine?” Scott asks the two boys standing in the doorframe to the kitchen. He’s just made his way inside to get more drinks for everyone. Austin pats Travises shoulder, just follows his dad to help.

For a moment, Travis just stands there alone, able to look outside through the big kitchen window. He can see Taylor sit on the side of the big round table. She looks tired and drained. He noticed that she barely touched any of the food tonight. Her mother has made a comment about Taylor’s lack of appetite earlier, and it surprised him that she didn’t react. Instead, she’s been sitting there, drinking one glass of wine after the other. And it makes him angry. It frustrates him. It’s been less than twenty-four hours since she’s been attached to an IV drip. Yet she’s sitting here, not taking care of her body, ignoring her health, pretending like last night never happened, after making him feel like crap for caring about her earlier today. He loves her. He loves her more than anyone else in this world, and he knows that she usually appreciates him caring for her. But her words today really stuck with him. He won’t be able to make this right for her, unless she wants to make it right herself.

Travis slowly makes his way outside to join the family. Taylor has saved a seat for him next to her. He just sits down, already feels her cold hand land on his arm. She pulls him closer, presses a kiss on his lips while listening to her cousin’s story about her weird neighbours. She tastes like white wine. Their fingers intertwine immediately and he can feel the shivers coming from her.

“Want me to get you a blanket?”

She nods immediately. She’s drunk. He can tell by the look in her eyes.

“Thanks, baby.”

Travis gets up and Andrea already points him to the where the TV blanket is at inside her house. He can already hear the conversation around the table shift while reaching for the blanket with his hands and making his way outside again.

“Darling, it’s still in the 70s right now. How can you be freezing?” Alison asks with worry on her face, everyone now turning to Taylor who still shivers slightly. She feels a bit overwhelmed suddenly, whilst Travis makes his way outside again. He places the blanket around her shoulders, helps her warm up a little.

“Well, guess that’s what happens when you don’t sleep at night and not eat anything during the day.” he mumbles, and the second these words have left his mouth is when he knows it was a mistake. Taylor suddenly doesn’t say anything anymore, just signals him to let go. She reaches for the ends of the blanket and warms herself now. An awkward silence is suddenly surrounding the table.

“Why, did you not sleep well, honey?” Andrea now asks, can immediately feel the tension between her daughter and her fiancé. She just shakes her head annoyed, reaching for her wine glass.

“I’m fine, mom. Just didn’t sleep well last night.”

Travis doesn’t say anything, just pours himself another glass of wine and keeps on listening to the conversations. He knows she’s mad about his comment, but he was right. After everything she’s been through last night she should take care of herself. Not this.

It takes one more hour of Taylor sitting under the blanket and listening to everyone’s conversations while ignoring him, until she feels her eyes shut down fully. Travis keeps on looking over to her, and notices that she’s close to passing out on the chair next to him. The warm blanket doesn’t really help her not get more and more sleepy. He knows she’s mad about his previous comment, but he decides to ignore her pout from before, just wanders with his hand to her head and fixes a curly strand of hair behind her ear.

“Wanna head home?” he asks then, and Taylor nods. After all, the majority of guests have already left and Taylor needs to go to bed. She can feel herself having reached her limits for today. And as angry as she is with Travis, she doesn’t argue, just thankfully accepts his arm around her waist, guiding her inside to say goodbye to the rest of her family before finding her purse and making her way out of the family house. As soon as they both approach the car, Travis holds the door open for her, making sure she gets in safely before wandering to his side of the backseat. The car starts and Travis finds her fumbling with her seat belt.

“Need any help?”

“Leave me alone.” she mumbles and he sighs, just leans his head back and shakes his head. He’s in pure disbelief that she still finds the strength in herself to fight with him. He really can’t believe it. He knows this is the alcohol speaking in her but he’s tired. Tired of her making this so difficult for both of them.

“I literally have known you for a full year now but I’ve never witnessed you the way you are today.” he says, full of anger and hurt. She doesn’t reply for a moment, just takes out her phone, pretending to be busy.

“All I did last night was take care of you, get you safely to your hotel room, call you a doctor, give you the time you need to recover, get you food, get you water, tell you to take care of yourself, spend time with your family. And all you do is treat me like a fucking idiot, accuse me of wanting you to be weak, telling me i’m an asshole. Seriously, is that what you think I deserve, Tay?”

“Well, you had no problem calling me out in front of my entire family when I specifically asked you not to. Thanks a lot for that by the way.”

“It was literally the truth. After last night, you.. you didn’t eat, you had at least three glasses of wine and..”

“Since when are you the food police? Since when do I need your permission to drink or not drink or eat or not eat? Did I miss something? I’m in a relationship Trav, not prison.” she yells at him and he looks at her but finds no words. He has no idea who this person next to him is. But what he really understands in this moment, is that she’s not okay. Last night must have shook her more to her core than he could’ve ever imagined. There’s no other explanation for this mean, hurtful, insensitive version of his girlfriend today. She’s never, not once, said anything like this to him.

“It’s literally impossible to talk to you right now.” he just mumbles, clearly pissed off, just looking out of the car window.

A few minutes later, the car comes to a stop inside the garage of her Nashville apartment. Security helps them out of car and into the elevator, and in less than two minutes, they both stand in her penthouse apartment and Taylor turns the little kitchen light on.

“I’ll sleep in the guest room tonight.”

“Yes, please.” she just replies, doesn’t even look at him. “Also, no need to wake me before your flight tomorrow. Just.. do whatever you want.” she adds, and leaves him speechless once more. Just yesterday she told him how sad she was that he will need to leave to go to LA for a couple of days to meet with his agency and discuss a few upcoming projects. Just yesterday she was thinking about accompanying him for a day, just to fly back to Europe after that. Just yesterday, she was the person he fell so deeply in love with. And he can’t seem to find her anywhere right now.

“Thanks, Tay. You can call me when you are yourself again.”

Taylor doesn’t reply, just grabs one of the water bottles from her fridge and makes her way upstairs, leaving him to himself.

She wakes up suddenly, her heart racing, her breathing patterns almost as fast as humanly possible. It takes a second for her to realize where she is, to realize that it was just a bad dream. For a moment, she sits up and reaches for her phone. 3:38am. She falls back onto her pillow, just realizes now how sweaty she really is. Her hand wanders to her forehead, and for a moment she just lays there and wipes the sweat from her forehead. The entire pillow is wet, just like the part of their blanket she just slept under. She swallows hard, needs to take a deep breath to remind herself that that was only a dream. She was on stage, in a stadium, and everyone of the thousands of people in front of her were people she knew somehow. Faces she once knew, faces she once trusted, people she used to love. And they all started to come for her, trying to kill her in the most horrific ways. There were knives, and guns. Ropes and pills. There was choking, there was strangling. And she had to just let it happen. She couldn’t move. She couldn’t run. She couldn’t scream. Her body was limb. All she could do was watch it happen to her. She was all alone. Nobody cared for her. Nobody gave her mercy.

For a moment, she cradles her head in her hands, feels the tears coming in. She looks around in the dark, realizing that Travis must have come into the bedroom at some point because his pillow is missing. She can’t believe it. She can’t believe they fought like this. Just in this moment, Olivia meows from the end of the room, already jumping onto the bed. With tears in her eyes, Taylor comforts her, realizing then that she’s freezing. After all, she managed to sweat through the thick material of her chiefs shirt. With shaking hands, she gets up, walks into her walk in closet and reaches for another one of his big shirts. For a moment, she holds the fabric close to her nose, breathes it in. It smells just like him. Him.

The only person on this planet who would’ve fought for her. Who would’ve tried his best to keep these thousands of people from torturing her. He would’ve done his best to shield her. And what does she do? Push him aside. Hurt him exactly where it hurts him the most. She loves how emotional he is. Loves what a good person he is. How loving he is. And instead of worshipping him for it, she managed to make him feel like absolute crap about it.

With a tear streaming down her face, she pulls the sweaty shirt from her body, pulls the new shirt over her naked torso and turns the light off again. Her vision is blurry from her tears now and for a moment, Taylor hesitates. She then decides to make her way down the dark hallway, until she reaches the guest room. To her surprise, she can see the nightlight still being on, and as soon as she approaches the door frame, she can find him tucked into bed, fully awake, watching something on tv. Benjamin is sleeping on the carpet next to him. He always loves being near Travis.

She knocks on the door once, and he looks at her in surprise.

“You’re up?”

“Yeah, can’t sleep.” he replies.

She doesn’t say anything, just slowly steps in. He can immediately see her moist hair standing from her head in all directions. Her eyes are red and watery, and he knows something is up.

“Are you..”

“Can we talk?” she says says with a breaking voice, and he can hear the tears immediately. He sits up and nods at her.

“Sure.”

She sits down in bed next to him, and he can see a tear running down her cheek.

“Are you sweaty or did you take a shower?”

“I had a really bad nightmare. I’m.. I’m really sweaty and disgusting, sorry.” she cries, just looking at her fingers. He can’t help but smirk over her comment, his finger already wandering to the little curl standing from her head, playing with it once.

“Don’t apologize. I’m sorry you had a nightmare.”

He can clearly see that she’s crying, and as much as he hates to see her this way, he appreciates that they can finally talk.

“I’m really sorry, Trav.” she mumbles then and looks up at him and right into his eyes. There she is again. The soul he loves so much. She’s still there.

“I’m sorry, too.”

“No, no. You didn’t.. you didn’t do anything. You literally are the best person. And.. I was just so horrible to you.” she whimpers quietly.

Trav’s hand slowly wanders onto her neck, stroking her moist hair behind her neck. She’s got goosebumps all over her skin. She must be freezing.

“Come here.” he mumbles, already pulling her into his arms. He hugs her for what feels like an eternity, and he can feel her little cries on his shoulder.

“Can you forgive me, Trav. I.. I just don’t know what’s wrong with me. I..”

“Of course. I love you so much, baby girl.” he whispers into her ear and kisses her head a few times. “I’m also sorry. For.. for some of the things I said. I can get really mean when I’m mad. I was also overreacting. I know it doesn’t help you when I pretend like you almost died last night. It’s just.. I worry too much about you. And seeing you knocked out the way I did last night was just scary. I should’ve not.. not kept on telling you how bad it was. Wasn’t really helpful of me.”

She shakes her head, slowly lets go of him. She really looks destroyed right now. Her hair everywhere, her face red from crying.

“No, no. I love how much you care for me. I literally have never had this with anyone. No one’s ever cared for me like you do.” she says, a tear streaming down her face. With his finger he wipes the tear away, both of his big hands now placed in hers.

“It’s just.. I feel like most of the time, I have the entire world against me. Because it’s not just fans, Trav. It’s stalkers. It’s crazies, people who threaten to kill me and my family. But.. I’ve been able to build a team around me to pretend like I’m safe. Truth is I’m never safe. Last night was a reminder that.. I can have the best people around me, you included, and if someone wants me dead they literally can if they really want to.” she cries, and it kills him. The thought of her not feeling safe just kills him.

“I just had a dream that everyone in front of the eras stage wanted to kill me. Strangle me, shoot me, kill me with a knife, poison me. And some of these people were people I once knew. It’s just.. I’m really fucked up, Trav. I know you fell in love with me because you think I’m this happy, pretty, funny person but truth is I’m literally a shot deer on the hunt most of the time and..”

“Hey, Tay. Stop it.” he interrupts her, not able to stand her crying like this. She covers her face in her hands and he just pulls her closer, hugging her tightly once more.

“I didn’t just fall in love with the happy, pretty, funny Tay. I also love the fucked up Tay. The one who tries to push me away when it gets ugly. And I also love Taylor Swift the CEO. I also love hormonal Tay. She’s a gem. She bakes all day and cries at everything.” He can feel her laugh once between her tears.

“What I’m trying to say is… I love you, no matter what. And at the end of the day, I hate to break it to you but no one is ever safe. You are not, and I’m not either. But we’re on this rollercoaster called life together, baby, and we get to learn and grow from everything that happens. Last night happened. And it was horrible. Let’s cry about it today, let’s sit down with your security team tomorrow and we’ll see what we can do to never have something like this happen again. Let’s talk about it. To the people you love, who support you. To a therapist, someone who can help you deal with it. I think these things are just.. life, baby. Unfortunately, this is life. But how we deal with it, that’s what we can decide and control.”

She listens to him talking and she can’t believe he’s real. Like a child in a candy store, Taylor just looks up at him, clings onto his lips and follows every word he says. She can’t believe he told her once that he’s not good with words. Can’t believe he thinks of himself as the dumb little brother who’s nothing but a fuck up. When in reality, he’s more mature than she could ever be. Quite literally the most intelligent person she’s ever met.

“I’m honestly really fucked up since last night, too. Because I had to see the person I love most in the world completely unconscious and drugged by a stranger. And you know how guilty I felt. But.. I had a good cry this morning. As you know. And I felt better after that. And instead of trying that, you literally just pretended to be fine all day, and instead turned into a wine drunk monster that scared the living shit out of me.”

She chuckles again, now wiping another tear away. She nods. He’s so right. She can’t believe how right he is in this moment.

“I was so angry at you today. I think I was more angry at myself. For.. for letting this happen to me.”

“Some things are not in your control, baby.”

She doesn’t say anything, takes a deep breath and a last shaky breath escapes her. Travis looks into her eyes, and all she can find is safety. Safety and forgiveness.

“You know what’s really weird?” she says quietly, nothing but the tv light flickering in the dark and his warm hands securely on her back now. She felt so cold in bed before, but now she’s warm again.

“I used to think I felt safe with you because you’re just a giant NFL player who can break anyone’s nose in a split second and is taller than anyone in my team.” he laughs quietly at her statement, both his hands still safely around her.

“But right now, I actually feel like, I feel safe with you because you’re.. just.. a good person. You.. you would never hurt me. You just.. love me, even when I’m a bitch and you pick up my mom’s smelly dog and get my cousin a jersey he’s asked for half a year ago and…” she feels herself getting emotional again, her hands wandering to his cheeks.

“Maybe you can’t save me from the world or myself, but you can still make me feel so so safe, Trav. No one’s ever made me feel this way before.”

He smiles at her, his lips finding her forehead again. He kisses her curly bangs a few times. His big hand securely on her head.

“Forgive me?”

He looks at her, just smiles. It’s not even a question for him.

“Of course. Nothing to forgive you for. Let’s go to bed, baby girl.”

She doesn’t argue, just nods. She’s exhausted. Deeply exhausted. Emotionally and physically.

“We can’t go to the bedroom though.” she mumbles, slowly getting comfortable under his warm sheets right next to him now.

“Why not?”

“I literally got so sweaty that all of our sheets are drenched now. I’m disgusting, baby. We have to sleep here.”

She makes him laugh once more, and he just nods, turns off the tv with one click and helps her get comfortable under the sheets of the guest room bed. With one swift motion, he pulls her closer, lets her be the little spoon while using his arm as her pillow and holding her hand tightly. It takes less than three minutes and she’s fully asleep. With his nose deep in her naked skin, he closes his eyes and allows himself to drift off, too.

Taylor opens her tired eyes, needs a moment to realize why she’s in the guest bedroom of her Nashville home. Her head moves once, and she pulls the soft blanket closest again. She yawns once, suddenly feels a massive amount of relief on her chest. She’s so glad they could talk last night. So glad she had a good cry. So glad she opened up to him. So glad that someone like him is her partner in life.

Taylor’s head is still pounding and she feels run down. But it’s okay. He was right. It’s okay to take a moment to cry before moving on.

As if she was run over by a truck once more, Taylor turns around, mentally and physically drained by the last two days, almost feeling unable to move. She wonders why Trav has left the bed already. Is it really so late? She suddenly remembers that he had to catch his flight to Los Angeles.

Frantically, she searches for her phone to check the time. She left it in the bedroom. Did he really leave without waking her, because that’s what she threw against his head in all her anger yesterday? She can’t believe herself sometimes. Can’t believe how horrible she treated him yesterday. She feels herself getting sad again. She can’t believe she won’t see him for the next week. Can’t believe she’s all by herself now to deal with all of this. She knows she’s not alone, she knows he’s always just a phone call away. But she’d be lying if she said she’s okay to be on her own for a while now, when really: she’s not. The lump in her throat is growing bigger and bigger. She slowly sits up, then lands on her feet and rubs her eyes to wake up. She slowly stands up to search for her phone in the bedroom, which she left after her horrible nightmare last night. But instead of making her way back to the bedroom, Taylor notices something else. There’s a specific smell coming from downstairs. Did he leave her breakfast? Barefoot and wearing nothing else but his huge shirt and her thong, she slowly walks downstairs. A smile creeps up on her face when she finds a pink bag from her favorite breakfast shop on the counter. He got her her favorite breakfast sandwich and a fresh juice before leaving. She steps up, happily unwraps the sandwich and was about take a bite when the front door suddenly opens and the big man she knows and loves so much casually makes his way inside.

“You’re up!” he says with a smile on his face and Taylor looks at him in confusion. He just takes off his sunglasses casually, places them on top of the counter. She turns her head to the clock on the wall. 1.26PM. What the hell is he still doing here?

“Where.. why are you not in LA? Did you miss your flight?” she instantly feels responsible for it, after all she was the one keeping him up for two nights in a row.

“I cancelled it. Just went to the Apple Store a few blocks from here to pick up a charger. For some reason, mine broke this morning. I checked yours but somehow yours doesn’t fit into mine.”

She watches him unpack his gadgets, not impressed by her confused look at all.

“How are you feeling? Did you sleep better after your nightmare?” he asks, unpacking his charger and trying to fit it into the outbox of his MacBook on the counter.

“Trav, you.. why are you not in LA? What do you mean you cancelled it?” she doesn’t understand what is going on. He was so excited to fly out and meet his agents to chat about a few upcoming movie projects. He just steps closer to her holding the tuna sandwich in her hand, the one he bought her this morning. He takes a bold bite out of the sandwich, just laughing at her outraged face. His full mouth wanders to her soft cheek and he steels her one quick kiss.

“I cancelled it because..” he chews, still standing right in front of his sleepy fiancé who looks at him in confusion. “I want to be there for you. I realized I can do these meetings online. And.. I think it would be good for me to be here the next week. And when you fly to Paris, I’ll go back to KC for a few days and visit you in Sweden to see the shows.”

She doesn’t really know what to say, just places the sandwich back on the counter in front of her.

“But.. I don’t want you to miss out on..”

“I’m not, Tay. I promise.” he assures her. “Coffee?” he asks her and she nods. Still tired from the past days, she just sits down on one of the bar stools, watches him work his magic with the coffee machine.

“How are you feeling though? You didn’t answer my question.” he asks.

“I’m happy you’re here. But.. I also feel weird about you cancelling your work thing for me.”

He doesn’t say anything, just finishes getting her cup of coffee ready and placing it right in front of her.

“Why is that?” he asks, she and she shruggs her shoulders.

“You shouldn’t have to jeopardize your career for me.”

He chuckles once, watches her sip on the hot coffee once. He can tell she enjoys this beverage a lot. Both her hands around the big cup, almost as if she’s warming herself from within.

“I’m not jeopardizing anything, Tay. It’s called priorities.”

She places her cup in front of her again and looks at him. He just stands close to her, his hand casually on her naked bum, his mouth finding the little spot in her neck he loves kissing so much.

“You’re my priority right now. Other times, football might be the priority again. But right now, my priority is to be with my future wife to support her. Very simple. I can easily move these meetings to late August. It’s nothing that needs to be done right now.”

She can’t believe his words right now, can’t believe it can be this simple and logical. It’s this moment she realizes: It’s possible. If you want to, you can. If you are someone’s priority, they will let their actions speak. It’s something she never really got right before, it seems.

Her small hand lands on his big one, right on top of her kitchen counter. And she smiles. For the first time in days, she really does. She gets closer to him, kissing him passionately. Both of her lips meeting his. Her eyes closed and her hand on his cheek. After a few seconds she pulls back, his forehead meeting hers.

“I’m so glad you’re here.”

He smiles at her, can tell she’s getting emotional. He just places his hand on her cheek now, kisses her forehead a few times.

“I’ll always be here, no matter what. You and our family will always have priority. I promise. Ride or die, baby.”

The End.

#taylor swift #taylor swift fanfiction #fanfiction #fanfic #writing #travis kelce #taylor and travis #taylor and travis fanfiction #ttpd #the eras tour #taylor swift eras #taylor

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harry-styles-obsessed · 9 months ago

Text

Requested: yes.

Synopsis: your and Harry’s daughter has been sick with some sort of fever and stomach bug for the last few weeks— a month after Harry went away on tour meaning your daughter was clingy for her dad, her separation anxiety getting worse. Harry hears of the news from you and he despite reassuring you that he’ll continue touring can’t just let his baby girl be sick and needing him… read on to find out what he does.

Dad! Harry x yn x daughter reader

Warnings: mention of being sick, puke, being poorly but mainly fluff of both daughter and reader. Enjoy!!

©️ please do not copy or translate my work.

Your daughter Layla was sick with a nasty bug. She had been for the past three weeks and she was constantly crying for her dad. It was heartbreaking for you because you hated seeing your baby girl crying. You were resting on the sofa arm wrapped around your daughter as she was curled up in your side, a bucket by your feet filled with puke and loads of used tissues sprawled out all over the place from the amount of tissues she had used. Layla was only 7 so being sick wasn’t nice for her— she had been puking for days now and you were concerned, getting advice from doctors who advised you to keep her home and let the medication work through her body. Which you did. But of course it wasn’t going to instantly make her better. You just had to be strong for her. You sigh softly running a hand through your hair which was messy from how stressed you had been. “Mummy” the little girl soon cried out, hiccuping and you quickly grabbed the bucket holding it underneath her chin just in time for her to puke into it her eyes remaining shut clearly still half asleep.. “you’re okay baby. Mummy’s here… mummy’s here..” you guided rubbing her back gently, soothing her through it as you pushed down the twisting in your stomach. It had occurred to you last night that you had most definitely too caught the bug but you didn’t care. You needed to take care of Layla.

You sighed quietly pushing her hair back as you hushed her gently, her soon leaning down again cuddling into you as she relaxed. You played with her hair lightly until eventually she had fallen asleep Toy Story on in the background before your phone buzzed. You without looking answered it lifting it to your ear “hi.” You murmured clearing your throat. “Hello my love.. how is she?” Harry’s voice rang through the phone and you sighed, you missed him deeply, you missed his touch— his smell. “Not great.” You admitted softly gazing down at the little girl. “She’s thrown up 24/7. She’s got a fever and I’m just concerned about her.” You murmured quietly to make sure not to wake her. “Want me to come home?” He questioned and you quickly shook your head before realising he couldn’t see you, you were sleep deprived to say the least. “No. Don’t let your fans down.. Ive got this under control.” You assured him yet his silence proved he was doubting you, worried about you and tempted to come home. “Harry keep doing what you love. Okay? I love you. I’ll face time you later on tonight as Layla wants to see your face okay?” Harry remained silent for a few moments silently contemplating whether to come home or not before he sighed softly “okay my love… I look forward to that. Sending my love. I love you.” “I love you too.” You spoke with a small smile before hanging up as you relaxed back into the sofa gazing at the tv as you began falling in and out of consciousness yet you never could properly fall asleep needing to make sure Layla was okay no matter what.

You weren’t sure how long had passed maybe a couple hours as it was now nearing morning time again, but you were holding your daughters hair back as she threw up in the toilet “it’s okay… good job… I’m here.” You comforted. Your stomach churned once again and you had to hold back your own sick, taking a deep breath as you attempted to breathe through it a strange pain in your stomach. As Layla finally stopped you helped her get up wiping her mouth and flushing the toilet before helping her walk back towards her bedroom all until a rather loud creak grabbed your attention making you tense up– you looked towards the source of what had created the sound before your eyes locked on those familiar green eyes. “Harry….” You whispered tears threatening to form in your eyes, Layla letting out a squeal Harry grinning from ear to ear as he slowly crouched down, bag slipping off his shoulder and falling onto the floor staying crouched to Layla’s height before he opened his arms for her his smile wide and bright as he tilted his head to the side “oh baby girl are you feeling a little bit poorly?” He questioned, you let go of Layla’s hand the small girl sprinting towards her daddy before she jumped into Harry’s arms almost knocking him over, but he stayed upright wrapping his arms tightly around her as he lifted her up spinning her around once. You watched with loving eyes your vision going slightly dizzy “harry— I just need to rest for a bit.. okay.” You spoke softly, you felt awful and although you wanted to hug him you didn’t think your legs would manage to keep you upright and you didn’t want to scare your daughter. Harry nodded watching as you entered your bedroom, his attention falling back to Layla as he set her back down on the floor hands lightly resting on her waist as he looked into her eyes before he raised a hand to her forehead “oh dear you are rather warm.” He murmured with a frown before he stood up straighter grabbing onto her hand as he walked with her back down stairs having her sit down on the sofa before he began searching through the medicine box.

He soon found Calpol and a thermometer before he walked back over to Layla “can I sleep daddy?” She murmured sadly Harry looking into her eyes seeing the exhaustion and sadness before he nodded “of course baby. After this okay?” She nodded and Harry smiled. “Arm up sweetheart.” He spoke pressing the small round button hearing the beep before he slid the thermometer underneath Layla’s armpit allowing it to take her temperature as he measured out some medicine for her to take, carefully spooning it into her mouth “good girl.” He praised with a small smile just in time for the thermometer to beep and he pulled it away from her checking it… too hot for normal. He exhaled calmly “it’s not good baby. But hopefully the medicine will get rid of your pains okay? Let’s go back upstairs yeah?” He spoke and she whined attaching herself to his neck, and Harry smiled softly before he lifted her up into his embrace as he carried her towards the stairs, carrying her up them her legs wrapped around his waist. “I missed you daddy.” She murmured to him quietly making his heart clench. “I missed you too darling. But I promise to be here for you until you feel better.”

Unbeknownst to you Harry had postponed his entire tour extending the days to another day just so he could see Layla and you. He carried the small girl into her room before laying her down and tucking her in, the Calpol already working as she fell into a deep sleep drowsily murmuring that she loved him. He covered her up in her blankets securing her favourite teddy under her arm before he kissed her cheek, turning on her night light before silently exiting the room pulling the door to so it was closed but not fully shut. He then wandered into your and his shared room finding you fast asleep, curled up, hands pressed firmly against your belly. He frowned in slight concern and walked towards you, sitting down. As the bed dipped and you felt a hand touch against your back you whined softly. “Darling you’re boiling.” The familiar voice spoke feeling your forehead and Harry exhaled “let me get you some medicine” “no.” You grabbed onto his wrist “already done…” you murmured tiredly and he nodded noticing a sick bucket off to the side on the floor. You must’ve caught the bug. He gently wrapped his arms around you pulling you close, as his slender fingers stroked against your stomach soothing it as best as he could, listening to your breathing as it began to calm down until you had fallen asleep. He remained awake keeping an eye on you for about fifty minutes.

“Daddy” he heard a whimpered voice, a small hand resting against his back and he slowly sat up, seeing Layla teddy in arms as she was close to sobbing. “I don’t feel good daddy.” He carefully leaned forwards helping her up onto the bed before he laid down with her, having her between you and him “I don’t feel good” she whimpered and Harry stroked her hair soothingly “I know baby… I know…” he began humming a soft tune to her, her hands soon grasping onto his larger one as she began playing with his fingers until eventually she was half asleep, tracing his tattoos lightly before she had fallen into another deep sleep. He too began relaxing before he fell into a sleep like state… but what felt like seconds later which was actually twenty minutes he felt the bed move abruptly eyes snapping open enough to see you rushing towards the bathroom hand covering your mouth. He silently but quickly stood up, hair slightly messy from where Layla had woken up unbeknown to him and played with his hair slightly. He rushed after you and when he found you he quickly pulled your hair back securing it back with a hairband he found on the counter as his free hand then slid down to rub against your back as you threw up until eventually you had fallen back into Harry, forehead sweaty and hot as he held you as you panted grimacing in pain “I don’t want to get you sick…” you murmured tiredly but Harry didn’t respond only holding you closer, he didn’t care if he got sick. He had to be there for you and Layla even if it risked getting the sickness… he honestly didn’t care. You and Layla were the most important things in his life. Nothing else. He had to look after you no matter what. And he always would.

#dad! harry styles #dad harry styles #harry styles fanfiction #harry x fem reader #daddy harry styles #harry styles fluff #harry styles comfort #harry styles x yn #harry styles x y/n #harry styles x fem!reader #harry styles x you #harry styles x reader

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thebroccolination · 5 months ago

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KRIST, FAME, AND WHY "YOU SIGNED UP FOR THIS" DOESN'T EXONERATE THE BEHAVIOR OF THE PUBLIC

Lindsay Ellis uploaded this video to YouTube framed around the myth that Yoko Ono broke up the Beatles. It's phenomenal, as her work often is. I'll probably watch the whole thing multiple times in the near future.

Toward the end of the video, Lindsay expands on the morbid paradox of fame. Many of us see it as this aspirational thing that famous people should be grateful to have, and yet we're also aware that the circumstances of being famous often lead to tragic ends for celebrities, either by violence or by their own self-destruction.

Over the past week, I made this thread to explain the events that led to Krist putting his foot down after months of trying to placate the segment of KristSingto fans who are vocally opposed to Krist sharing any part of his continued close friendship with Gawin, Krist's costar from his 2023 BL series "Be My Favorite."

The day he started his break from social media, Krist addressed his fans about what he'd been dealing with very clearly and characteristically sincerely. He expressed his confusion, explained the impossible situation this unreasonable portion of his fanbase had put him in, and ultimately just gave the vibe of a very tired teacher. Coupled with the reality that Krist's fanbase is on average much older than he is, it's a little absurd that a twenty-eight-year-old had to tell a fair number of middle-aged, tax-paying adults that he's allowed to have friends.

Krist concluded his TikTok Live only to be tagged in even more abuse and complaints on Twitter. I saw some of it and didn't bother saving receipts, but you can imagine it. You're hurting your comeback with Singto by posting Gawin's photos, Krist. This comeback isn't going well, Krist, and it's your fault. You're supposed to be loyal to Singto, Krist. You abandoned Singto at the outing, Krist. If you hate it here so much then just go back to Gawin, then. Don't you feel guilty for ruining Gawin's career, too? He must be good in bed for you to come to his defense like this.

Oh, wait, I did save that one.

Presumably sensing that he had done everything he possibly could, Krist addressed fans one last time on his Instagram Broadcast channel.

Let no one misinterpret this: Krist left social media mainly and specifically because some Peraya were viscerally outraged that Krist didn't cast Gawin aside and spend 100% of his time adhered to Singto. Even though Krist is the one who wanted the comeback, a significant number of Peraya seem to think he's not trying hard enough.

"Not trying hard enough" even though he was so obsessed with getting Peraya Party right that he made himself sick.

This tweet was when he admitted himself for an IV to keep himself healthy, and then he ended up getting admitted anyway for almost a week. During which time he continued working on the concert from his iPad, messaging staff and Singto who continued with rehearsals.

"Not trying hard enough" isn't something Krist knows how to do. He's a self-professed perfectionist who identified so strongly with the character of Anxiety in "Inside Out 2" that he posted about her on his Facebook seven different times. He has an Anxiety plush. He even tweeted about the anxiety attack scene when he visited Beijing for work.

Krist has spoken about his experiences with depression. He moved back home in 2022 to be with his parents at the suggestion of his psychiatrist, the fourth he'd seen.

It's widely known that Krist hates being alone. Singto recently said it's something that concerns him, that Krist has someone or other at his house most of the time because he doesn't want to be on his own. Just last year Krist said his favorite thing about his four cats is that they're with him always, whereas people eventually have to go their own homes.

Rather than close himself off, however, Krist has remained a phenomenally open and affectionate person. He treats his fans like friends. (The ones who aren't trying to control his life.) He took the time to address fans twice in text and in video.

And yet, as soon as Krist stepped away from the helm of his own narrative, some fans were horrified by the idea that Krist might be mad at them. Others began to twist his words and intentions to suit a more palatable narrative. This wasn't about Gawin, no. He did it for Singto.

And while, yes, Krist did also make it clear that he won't tolerate people trash-talking one of his favorite people, this was about Krist.

It wasn't only about Singto or Gawin. This was Krist facing down fans who have relentlessly demanded more than he could have or even should have ever reasonably done for them.

It's a special kind of horrifying to me that fans are misrepresenting Krist when Krist clearly said as recently as last October that what hurts him most is being misrepresented.

I spoke with some Peraya in DMs about this whole mess.

A few said they have no issue with Gawin, they're only envious of the closeness he has with Krist. They're both musicians and singers, and they're both people-shaped emotions who went through hell together during all the "lol who asked for this pairing" and "ew I'm not watching the homophobe show" nonsense.

Others said Krist is behaving childishly and that he should just ignore everyone.

After all, all of this comes with the territory of being famous. It's normal. He shouldn't overreact. He's taken the wife role. He should be cute and soft and sweet at all times.

When I posted my thread about this, some were underwhelmed by the informational tone and had hoped it would be more of a call-out. Thing is, I'd already criticized that portion of the Peraya fandom:

It's frankly beyond my comprehension how Krist has made it this far as stable and as kind as he is. He was bashed by homophobes for starring in SOTUS in 2016, then stalked at his university by fans who disapproved of him having a girlfriend since he belonged to Singto, harassed about his sexuality until he snapped, vilified by international fans who showed up late to the party in 2020 and made everything a thousand times worse by not bothering to fact-check anything they were seeing, tormented off social media, put through four different psychiatrists, lost the partner he'd been through all of this with, found a new one, lost him, and gained his original partner back only for fans to demand more from him.

And the thing is, I don't want to say all of this on Twitter because it's becoming more and more of a noxious hellscape with every passing day, and the people who need to embrace this aren't going to read it. But I did want to say it somewhere.

Watching Lindsay's video, I felt such a bolt of fear. He's just been pushed so far, and fame isn't what destroys: it's people.

So I'm so proud of him for handling this with composure and strength. I'm proud of him for keeping the promise he made to Gawin in October last year at his solo concert, that nothing would change between them.

One of my Gawin fan friends said it best: Krist was the first person to see Gawin's potential and then show the world. He featured Gawin in his own solo concert, he mentored him through promotion, he opened up to Gawin about his life and his thoughts. He would never cast Gawin aside, and the fact that people are still trying to hand-wave how important Gawin is to him is maddening.

He loves Singto. He also loves Gawin. One doesn't cheapen the other. He loves a lot of people. That's who Krist is.

The idea that Krist should be cute and demure and ignore constant harassment he can't avoid because he needs to use social media for work is so unimaginably cruel I can't fathom how it could even transform from an idea to a real belief. Whether you like it or not, he's standing up for himself now.

Being famous eases some things and barbs others. You'll get free stuff and fans who admire you, but you may also get a deterioration of your mental health and fans who feel entitled to your body, soul, and mind.

You tell 'em, sweetie.

#krist perawat #gawin caskey #singto prachaya #kristsingto #gawinkrist #okay time to sleep for a hundred million years

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savthemusic · 2 months ago

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i need to put this somewhere that someone might see is someday so a part of my story can be told.

a couple days ago, i was on the verge of taking my life.

i had the pills in my hand and nearly downed the rest of the bottle before calling it a night. i didnt tell anyone. i didnt have anyone to tell. didnt write a note or anything cuz i figured nobody would care about what i had to say, they never cared before. all my life ive lived in an abusive household, always looking over my shoulder wondering if id suddenly set my stepdad off, never knowing what would make him tick. threats on my life had been made many times for small things, i never knowing if getting a glass of water would be the last thing i do. ive also been struggling internally with my gender and my identity, who i wanna be, what i wanna do. ive made attempts to take my life before, none of them successful, but i didnt expect to make it past 20. i always told myself if i wasnt out by 20 id just get it over with. im about to be 21 soon and i didnt plan to even be here, i have no direction, i dont know who i want to be. ever since i was a child i've always had flickers in my mind of wanting to be a girl, wishing i was born a girl, maybe id fit in. all of my friends have always been girls and id get teased for it by the adults in my life. calling me a "ladies man" and stuff like that, i hated it. not only did i hate that i didnt fit in with them enough to just be friends, i hated being considered a man. i didnt find out what "transgender" was until middle school and soon the pieces all clicked together but i had to hide it. from friends, from family and eventually from myself. my stepdad has told me many times that if he were to find out i was gay or anything that he'd kill me on the spot. just the thought of what he'd do if i told him i was a girl made me feel sick, so i hid. all of this has built up until the other day i decided id rather no longer live than continue to live like this.

i remembered seeing online people talking about a movie that every trans person must see. I Saw the TV Glow. i decided to watch it, it'll be the last thing i do. cross off one last thing on my forever-incomplete bucket list.

the movie saved me. if it werent for this movie i wouldnt be here today typing this. i related with the MC in every way and it hurt to see her live the life i wanted to avoid. i cried. i cried for the rest of that night, i apologized to people in my life and let them know i appreciate them and i vowed that i wouldnt let myself fall down the path of hiding from my true self until its too late. "there is still time". that quote has been playing in my mind ever since that night. ive had regrets of not ending it that night, knowing that if i did i wouldnt be feeling this way anymore, but the quote is true. just a few more years and i'll be out of this house, out of this state that wants me dead, i'll be free.

my mind is drifting, starting to overthink, i'll cut the story here, but i just wanted it to be known that anyone that comes across this that even tho things are hard now you just need to keep holding out, patience will pay off in time. even if things change and i end up grabbing that bottle of pills again or if my stepdad does it instead i'll know that at least my story is out there.

there is still time.

#i saw the tv glow #trans #vent #transgender

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whonsper · 1 year ago

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my goal this month is at least a completed first draft for my fanfic, broken eggs. i dont know if the story itself will be a whole 50k, but i wouldnt doubt it seeing as its daily entries over the course of 90 days. shouldnt be too bad... id like to try to reach that 50k goal either way! if its not in writing then i get to go back and edit it

ive been working with this world for a little bit so i mostly know whats going on but i am going into this nano with a half completed outline!

honestly my ultimate goal is getting the first chapter or so completely done by mid november for my friends birthday

It’s that time of year! Nano participants, let me talk to ya!

What are y’all working on? Are you going for 50k, or just working on a project? Meeting a goal? Please, tell me, I’m all ears!!!

#crossing my fingers i can do this #im already starting out at a bit of a disadvantage as ive been sick the past couple days hence why i didnt finish my outline #and ill probably be sick for the next couple days too but hey that means i can write more when im not sleeping

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elliezlils11utt · 10 months ago

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Bad idea - girl in red. (E.W)

content: You cant get your on & off ex, Ellie Williams, out of your head. So you decide to call her over.

song link: https://open.spotify.com/track/57j65yC2HggQfmYNc6rdOK?si=2416f86b42e84be8

warnings: nsfw, hate sex, angst, smut, mean!ellie, degration, reader is a hot shit mess. (me!) if i missed anything lemme know!

a/n: Im still sick asf and my phone is broken so ive kinda just been writing the past few days. this is not my best work, like at all. (its so bad) but the storyline is kinda interesting. (based on "bad idea"- girl in red)

proofread?: none of my work is ever proofread lmao.

You and Ellie had been broken up for a couple months now. But of course you had not been able to get her slick ass smile out of your head. She plagued your thoughts, being the only thing you could think of. She was the worst partner you could ever have. But, god was she ethereal.

So when you sat at the edge of your bed with her image glued to the inside of your eyelids you picked up your phone. Was this a bad idea? Probably. Did you care? Nope. You sat there staring at the past messages. The fights, then the make up texts. Then more fucking fights.

You squeezed your eyes shut. Contemplating the mistake you were about to make. Its like she was a fucking drug you were addicted too. You couldn't get enough of her, even If you tried. Which you really did this time. Really hard. This had been the longest you and Ellie had stayed apart. Ever. You always somehow ended up back with her. Ignoring the pleas of your family and friends to dump her ass for good this time. It was a bad idea, to think you could stop. Because now here you were, your phone up to your ear with Ellie on the other line.

“Hey, ellie?” You stumble over your words.

“Hey.” Fuck. fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. Her voice.

“Uh- um. What are you doing right now?”

“Nothing.”

“Wanna come over? Like, for a smoke.” bad idea, bad idea, bad idea.

What you can only assume is an amused chuckle muffles the phone line. “Sure.”

“Kay, cool! Uh, see you soon?”

“Mhm.”

The line ends abruptly. Oh fuck. Ellies coming over. Again. Fuck why did you do that? Your totally fucked now. You spend the following minutes pacing around your house. One little horny butt dial can turn into a series of bad decisions. You knew this. Yet Ellie is sitting across from u on your coach. Blunt in mouth, eyes on u.

“You know, ive missed us.” she admits while passing the weed to you. You take a drag of the blunt, ignoring her blatant attempt to ‘win you back’ (it was working)

“Why did you call me over..?”

“You want the truth?”

She just stares back at you with those droopy red eyes of hers. Those gorgeous fucking eyes that got you into this mess in the first place.

“Im horny. and i missed you.” Smoking always makes the whole truth come out of you. Even if you didn't want it to.

“Yeah?” There it is. That cocky lopsided smirk.

“Yeah.” Blowing the smoke out of your mouth you lean closer to her. And she does the same. The tension makes the air thick and foggy. A competition to see who will break first. (that she always wins) and surly this time was no different. You close the gap between you two. Pressing your lips onto hers. She cups your face with her hands, desperately pulling you farther into her. She put her hands under your shirt. Undid your bra and said these words. “Darlin you're so pretty it hurts” breaking the kiss she pulls your shirt over your head. And threw your clothes down on the floor. Your brain goes numb. Allowing Ellie to take complete control. All you can think about is her lips on yours. Too busy thinking about the wet kisses trailing down your neck to worry about the consequence to this pleasure.

She said “darling are you ready for more?” Her hands found your tits rubbing the fatty flesh in her hands while she kissed your collarbones. Her lips pecked kisses down your body. Her tattooed hand slipped down and into your painties, feeling your heat. her finger explored your slippery folds. You throw your head back while whimpers leave your mouth. She plunges a finger into your sopping cunt. “F- Fuck els”

“Yeah? You like that pretty girl? You missed my fingers, yeah?”

You just nod repeatedly. Another finger finds its way into your cunt. Her digits curl into you relentlessly.

“Words baby.”

“Fuck els. Yes. y- yes.” You moan

“Fucking slut.” she chuckles before returning her mouth onto your tit. Her tongue swirling around your pebbled bud and her fingers pumping in and out of your pussy makes your back arch. But you can't help but be pissed at yourself for letting her bring you this pleasure after the pain she caused you. This is wrong. You shouldn't be doing this. “Fuck, fuck, fuck, ellie. Ellie stop.” you push her head away.

“What's wrong? I thought you wanted this.”

“I do, I mean. At least I thought I did.” You quickly throw your shirt back on.

“I don't get it?”

“It was a bad idea, calling you up. I shouldn't have said anything. We are bad together ellie. I fucked up.” guilt rushes over you. You shouldn't have said anything. And that was the truth. You told yourself that you would never get back with Ellie again. Ever. You told yourself that you would never let ellie fuck you again. You told yourself that you wouldn't let Ellie get in your head again. “I need to be alone. Just, go? Please.”

“Yeah alright. Call me when u wanna finish this, kay? Cause u always do” She says bluntly before rolling her eyes and leaving. A tear breaks free from your glossy eyes. Thats fucking problem. She thinks that you will call her again. Because ‘you always do.’ And she's not wrong. You always end up calling her again, Whenever u get lonely, or horny, or miss her. Who the fuck would miss Ellie, fucking, Williams? You. You miss her. Because you can't get enough.

a/n: I apologize for this. :D

#tlou2 #tlou fanfiction #tlou #ellie tlou #bad idea #girl in red #ellie williams #ellie x fem reader #ellie x reader #the last of us 2

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wrathofrats · 7 months ago

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Mushy May Day 10- quiet nights

Aethers overwhelmed in the infirmary. Omega and delta calm him down.

Thanks to @forlorn-crows for the prompts this month!

Aethers eyes stung.

He stared at the speckled white countertop while delta whizzed past him once again to check someone’s beeping iv. His head felt fuzzy, his vision felt far away. A pressure behind his eyes he could only hope wasn’t any real tears, just exhaustion. The sterility of the air made his stomach turn, an absent thought granted to wonder when the last time he ate was.

“Hey, are you doing alright?”

A large hand rested on aethers back. Omegas voice was comforting, almost too much so. Enough that the pressure behind aethers eyes only deepened as he attempted to blink away whatever tears were forming. It shouldn’t be overwhelming, just the knowledge that omega recognized his emotions and cared, but aether can barely speak beyond the handful of napkins that felt wadded in his throat to express that he was ok.

The silence was enough for omega. He remembers his first couple months topside. Always either touring, practicing, or attempting to tend to any sick or wounded siblings. A constant rotation of activity and need. Delta also barely held it together as well when he was first thrown into the rotation of being a quint, mostly being sent down to help in the morgue. Hes always been better with them anyways.

But staff was short, and something was going around the abbey. It was just a couple minutes past midnight before they all had even gotten the chance to breathe. Aether felt as if he was holding constant pressure on a wound. Enough attention and force to hold the blood in, until it eventually stopped. The moment to calm down leaving it to bleed freely.

The beeping from down the hall stopped. Silence fell over the wing as static rushed to fill the space in aethers head.

“Just take a second aether, sit down” omega pulled out a chair and lightly pushed on his shoulder to get him to sit. Aether played with his hands nervously in his lap. He feels like he had forgotten something, like there was a mistake he missed, like there had to be something else to do.

Delta soon walked back to take his own seat in the nurses station, giving omega a concerned look over aether state.

“Jellyfish, can you grab aether some water?” Omega said quietly over his shoulder “and maybe one of the expired granola bars”

“I’m fine omega” aether finally spoke, looking up at the older ghoul. “Just a long night, I can handle it”

“It’s ok if you can’t”

Omega pulled up another chair into their little triangle when delta handed him the small snacks. It was a nice peaceful moment between them, omega wondered how many times they’d been able to sit together without it being band or work related.

“You haven’t drank any water in 5 hours. You’re upset because you’re dehydrated and hungry” delta mentioned matter of factly. Aether had to snort at the bluntness, taking a small swig of his water.

“Again, I’ll be ok. I’ll get used to it, a lot happened tonight but it’s fine” the granola bar made him cringe. The spoiled plastic taste on his tongue making him take another larger drink of water. He would have to tell papa later they needed a better supply of food back here, though he’s sure the others have mentioned it.

“Even delta still can’t handle it aeth, that’s why we banish him to the morgue. So we definitely don’t expect you to be ok with everything so soon” omega joked, sending a lighthearted smile to delta.

“I thought they sent delta to the morgue because he made the siblings uncomfortable?”

“They did” delta said

They couldn’t help but all giggle with each other, half a joke and half a truth, but delta never minded.

“You’re doing great, kid, just know that. I’m proud to have you here with us. Besides, the siblings love you”

“They do?” Aether asked

“Yeah, one earlier said that she wanted you to take her temperature with your-“

“Delta” omega warned

#@ghuleh-recs for the divider!#I love delta #mushy may #delta au where he’s fine just a bit off putting #he’s a fucking creature I need to write regular delta more #the band ghost #ghost #nameless ghouls #ghost bc #fanfic #wrath writes #omega ghoul #delta ghoul #aether ghoul #mushy may 2024

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wild-lavender-rose · 9 months ago

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Hi love! I don't know if you still take requests, but looking at your MASH content and I forgot how much I fell in love with this series. If possible, with the Hurt/ Comfort Alphabet, I was thinking Nightmare x Unable to Breath for Hawkeye. Reader had succumbed to a bad case of pneumonia and is having to stay in Post- OP to gain some antibiotics via IV. With Hawkeye taking the night shift, he hears reader mumbling and stirring in her cot as she has a horrible nightmare. He wakes her up which startles her and throws her into a slight panic which makes it hard for her to breath from the sickness and the panic. Hope you're having an amazing day/night!

Hey, Mer! I will never not love and want to write for this series, these men *deep sigh of longing* I absolutely love everything about this show. I hope you enjoy!

Warning: Description of nightmare, pneumonia symptoms, panic attack, struggling for breath

"No. No! Leave me alone!"

"Hey, easy, easy,"

"No," you bolted upright, finding yourself tangled in the arms of Hawkeye. The demon in your dream vanished, replaced by the recuperating soldiers lying in the cots around you in post op.

Hawkeye was there, his blue eyes worried as he held you upright and brushed the sweaty hair from your face. "Easy, it's okay. You're safe, it's okay,"

You looked into his eyes, seeking his stability. You were sweaty and shaking all over, and the congestion was making it hard to breathe. You had been brought to post op for antibiotics after a common cold had mutated into pneumonia. The past couple days had been a haze of pain killers and fever. dreams, usually involving demons. It was hard to breathe when you were calm, but now it felt impossible.

"H-Hawk," you rasped, gripping his arms. "Can't, I can't,"

"Look at me, sweetheart. Just look at me." Hawkeye took deep breaths that you tried to copy. "Slow down, just focus on breathing."

You nodded, panic easing as your breathing began to slow. The nightmare left you weak and exhausted. You leaned over, resting your head against Hawkeye's shoulder. "I love you."

The words slipped out, unfiltered, a result of your illness and the warm, overwhelming safety you felt in his arms.

"I love you too." Hawkeye pressed a kiss to your forehead. "Just rest now."

Fanfic Masterlist

#mash hawkeye pierce #hawkeye pierce #hawkeye x you #hawkeye x reader #hawkeye x y/n #mash show #hawkeye mash #mash fanfiction #mash hawkeye #mash #hawkeye pierce x reader #Hawkeye pierce x you #Hawkeye pierce x y/n #mash series #mash 4077

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dragonflylady77 · 1 year ago

Text

definitely better than being dead

a 'billy didn't die' day fic

Also on Ao3

I wrote this over the past day and a half, rushing to finish it on time, while it's still July 4 somewhere.

@spaceofentropy @fizzigigsimmer @lovebillyhargrove @shieldofiron @darleenjade

++++++++

When Billy comes to, everything hurts.

He keeps his eyes closed, even though the space around him feels dark, and slowly takes a tally of where it hurts: hands, sides, chest, back, feet too...

He listens to the noises in the room and the regular beeping of a machine close by tells him he’s in a hospital.

Huh.

This is new.

Neil never lets him go to the hospital, not unless he absolutely has to, like that time before they left Cali—no, not thinking about that.

Billy listens harder. There, breathing that’s not his, rustling of clothes as whoever is sitting by his bed shuffles to get more comfortable.

He tries to remember what happened, how he got there but it’s a blur. He knows something crashed into his car, and he remembers being pulled into that dark building on the side of the dark back road but after that, only pain. It’s fragmented, he’s getting flashes of people’s faces, horrible things that… thing… made him do, oh fuck, Heather, I’m so sorry, then the girl with her hand on his face and her mind in his memories.

It comes back to him, the beach, the wave, seven feet tall, the evil monster he helped build and how… the thought makes him feel sick.

He pushed back with a roar to protect the girl who brought him back to himself, his arms still hurt from the effort that took. There were fireworks then there was just excruciating pain and darkness and he thought he was done. He wanted to be done.

Yet somehow he’s still here. Breathing and hurting. He realises his hands are clenched into fists and wills his fingers to unfurl. It’s a slow process that takes all his concentration. One of his fingers touches something warm and Billy freezes. Shit. He hadn’t meant to make contact with whoever is by his bedside.

His eyelashes flutter open and everything is blurry at first. He sees a flash of red then he is being squeezed tight. Too tight.

“I can't breathe.” His voice sounds like gravel from disuse and he is craving some water. The arms around him relent a bit but don’t go away. Billy can’t remember the last time someone hugged him.

“Oh Billy, I’m so happy you finally woke up.” The voice is trembling but he recognises it.

“Max? What…” Billy is not sure what he wants to ask so he stops. Lets himself enjoy the closeness like the touch starved loser he is and wonders how long he’s been lying in a hospital bed.

He moves his arm to wrap it around Max and she burrows closer, her face against his neck and he feels wetness against his skin. Tears? For him? Surely not.

“Why are you crying?” He has to push the words through dry lips, his tongue feels like it weighs a ton. It just makes her cry harder. Billy is very confused but the thirst for water wins over the thirst for answers. “Wa… need water…”

“Hang on,” a voice he didn’t think he’d hear again says and a cup of water with a straw in it appears in front of him. Billy tries to lift his free hand but it’s too much effort, he’s been lying in a coma for too long and the IV in his arm makes it uncomfortable. He lets out a long defeated sigh and closes his eyes again. Max is still hugging him, and he lets her, even though his chest is starting to hurt again.

“Let me help,” Harrington says. Billy opens his eyes and Harrington is holding the cup and the straw closer so Billy can take a couple of sips. The cool liquid soothes Billy’s throat but too soon, Harrington takes the cup away, telling Billy he needs to start slowly, to let his body adjust to it again.

“I’ll go tell the nurse you’re awake,” Harrington says, putting the cup on the table at the foot of the bed and turning towards the door.

“How long…?” Billy manages to ask as Steve opens the door.

“A hundred and forty-seven days,” Harrington replies without turning around.

The door closes softly behind him and Billy is left alone with a sobbing Max and even more questions than before.

“Max.” He squeezes her arm to get her attention. “Max, sit up. What the fuck is going on?”

Wiping her eyes with her sleeves, the teenage girl sits up on the side of the bed and takes his hand in hers. Her eyes look bluer than usual in the low light of the room and she looks thinner than the last time he saw her.

“Shitbird, why are you here? Why is he?”

“I’m here every day,” she says with a sniffle. “Steve gave me a ride because Mum was too drunk. Today is Thanksgiving so she started earlier than usual.”

“Thanksgiving? What the fuck? Where’s…” He couldn’t say it. Wouldn’t say it, lest it made the man barge in to teach him a lesson again.

“I know you have a million questions, and I promise I’ll answer as many as I can.”

“Okay.” Billy is still very confused but he figures Max’s promise is better than nothing.

The nurse comes in, followed by a bunch of doctors and Max hops off his bed and goes to stand with Harrington by the window.

Billy loses track of them as he is whisked out of the room for a plethora of tests.

When they wheel him back to his room a couple of hours later, he’s even more exhausted than when he woke up from his five-month-long coma.

He smiles at the nurse giving him his pain relief, nodding when she mentions a tray with his dinner. Soft diet, she said. He doesn’t think that will be anything too exciting. He might get ice cream and jelly, though, which would be nice. They gave him some when he went to hospital with a broken arm when he was ten.

But instead of the nurse, Steve Harrington comes in through the door holding a tray and a bag.

Billy feels a surge of excitement at the sight and, try as he may, the anger and antagonism that coloured his every interaction with Harrington before that fateful night are nowhere to be found.

Billy is left simmering with his attraction for this boy and the non-stop craving for his touch. He grips the sheets with both hands to stop from reaching out. Harrington wouldn’t want Billy to touch him anyway. Pretty boy deserves better than this. Billy is damaged goods, even worse now than before, and trash like him doesn’t deserve love, Neil taught him that.

“Are you okay?” Harrington asks when he stops at the end of the bed and sets his precious cargo on the table.

Billy nods, all his focus on not reacting. Can’t let him know. Hold it in until he’s gone, like every other time. Billy finds it’s harder than it used to be.

“If you say so, it’s just…” Harrington looks at the monitor hooked to Billy then back at him. “Your heart rate picked up when I came in, it’s a lot higher than it was earlier.”

“I don’t know, man, I’m not a doctor.” Billy shrugs then nods towards the tray. “Is that my dinner?”

“Um yes, jelly and ice cream and what looks like chocolate milk. The nurse said you were allowed soft foods so I brought you some mashed potato and gravy, and some pumpkin pie Mrs Henderson made. I checked with the nurse and she said you’d be okay to eat the filling.”

“Why?” Billy asks when Harrington wheels the table closer. Billy starts on his super nutritious dinner with gusto. He hasn’t had ice cream and jelly in years so he’s going to enjoy it.

“Why only the filling?” Harrington looks confused. “If you don’t like it, that’s fine, I’ll just—”

“No, pretty boy, why are you here?”

Fuck. The nickname slips out before Billy notices and now Harrington looks embarrassed, his cheek a little pinker than before. But then he looks straight at Billy, and there’s that fire that Billy was looking for last year. Feels like a million years ago.

“I can leave if it’s easier,” Harrington says and that’s the last thing Billy wants. Max promised him answers but she left before he could get any. He figures Harrington might know a lot.

“No, don’t.” Billy sighs, looking down at his hand clenching on the spoon. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that. It’s late, I’m hungry, I’m sore and I missed the last five months of my life. You probably have better things to do on Thanksgiving than entertain the guy who beat you up last year.” Billy glances up to find Harrington’s brown eyes fixed on him. “I’m sorry for that too.”

Harrington laughs. “That was a long time ago, Billy. I got over it, especially once I realised how it must have looked like for the outside. Then…” Harrington looks sombre for a moment. “Then you sacrificed yourself to save the world.”

“Sorry it didn’t stick.” Billy looks away, dejected. Always on the outside. No friends for Billy, no, sir. Trash, loser, reject. Appetite gone, Billy drops the spoon in the tray and gives the table a shove. It rolls away just enough to be out of the way.

“Don’t say that.” Harrington comes over to sit in the chair Max was occupying earlier on the side of the bed.

“It’s true. You’re all better off without me around. Especially my family.” Billy curls up into a ball on the bed, facing the side Harrington is sitting on, because he’s weak.

“Bullshit!” Harrington exclaims, taking Billy’s hand in his and Billy can’t help but stare at their hands as Harrington links their fingers together. “Max has missed you so much, Billy. She’s been here every day once we found out where you were. She sneaked out of the house at first then once your dad left—”

“He left? Neil’s gone?”

“Fuck, I shouldn’t have dropped it on you like that, I’m so sorry. Billy, we thought you were dead, there was a funeral. Then about a month later, your dad, he…” There are tears in Harrington’s eyes and Billy isn’t sure he wants to know anymore.

Harrington clears his throat, squeezing Billy’s fingers before he continues, “Your dad emptied your room and put everything on the curb. He, um, he was gonna light all of your stuff on fire and she screamed so much and so loud some of the neighbours came to check what was going on. She got him to change his mind as long as she could find someone to take the boxes away. She called me on the walkie-talkie and told me what had happened. We piled all your stuff in my car and put it in a corner of my garage.”

“Um, yo-your parents okay with that, Harrington?” Billy asked, wiping his eyes on a corner of the sheet with his free hand. If ever he’d needed a reminder of how much his dad hated him…

“Steve,” came the reply, with another squeeze of his fingers before Steve added, “I don’t give a fuck, I haven’t seen them since last Chrismas anyway.”

“Wow.” That explained a few things, Billy thinks. Like why Steve is always surrounded by the Weird Kids Gang. Must get lonely in that big house, no matter how much money you have in the bank.

“Yeah, you don’t have the monopoly on parents who suck,” Steve said with a sad grin.

“Clearly. How did you find out I wasn’t dead?”

“Oh, well the Byers moved to Cali at the end of July and about a week after that, I got a call from El in the middle of the night. That’s the girl you saved from the meat monster. She, um, she said you were alive and she knew where you were.”

“How the fuck would she know that?” Billy was getting really frustrated with the way the answer to any question always brought more questions.

“Okay, um…” Steve takes a deep breath and locks eyes with Billy. “I’m gonna need you to listen while I explain. I swear it’s all true and I’ll answer any questions after, okay?”

Billy nods. He has no fucking clue what’s going on but he’s never seen Steve this serious before, and they had History together senior year.

“That thing that attacked you was a creature from another dimension. The kids call it the Mind Flayer. It’s like, made of smoke, until it finds a host. It attacked Jonathan Byers’ brother last year and we thought we’d managed to get rid of it that night you found me at their house. It comes from this dimension that’s a warped copy of ours, filled with monsters, creatures with flower heads and lots of teeth. We, um, we call it the Upside Down. El was raised by a complete psycho who kidnapped kids and did experiments on them that gave them powers, like, mind powers, I’m not really sure how it works. She can see in the Upside Down and she can find people in this thing she calls the void. She can open portals into the Upside Down as well and fight the monsters. Again, I’m not sure how it works, but she kinda lost her powers after the big showdown at Starcourt Mall and we all thought that was that.”

“But then she rang you in the middle of the night?”

“Uh huh. Then we had to wait for her to make it back to Hawkins. That’s when she told us about a portal at the bottom of Lovers Lake and—”

“Steve,” Billy interrupts because he had to. He is getting a bit sore lying on his side so he rolls over onto his back, leaving his hand in Steve’s.

“What?”

“How come I never knew this fucking town has a thing called Lovers’ Lake?”

“I don’t know, Billy. I’ll take you if you want. Can I finish the story now?”

Billy stares at Steve, waiting for him to realise the enormity of what he said. He knows when Steve does because his cheeks turn pink and his eyelashes flutter.

“Oh. Um. Billy, I—”

“I’m tired. You should leave.” Billy doesn’t want to hear anymore. Harrington doesn’t look like he’s going to punch Billy in the face, maybe because he’s in a hospital bed and Harrington feels sorry for him. Billy isn’t sure what the hand holding is about but he doesn’t need anyone’s pity, he knows that much. Billy starts pulling his hand away but Harrington doesn’t let him.

“Billy…”

“What?”

“I almost lost you when I didn’t know I could have you, you really think I’m going to let go now that I know you want me back?”

“What are you talking about?” He knows he sounds defensive but that kind of talk gets you beaten up. He pulls again and this time Harrington lets go of his hand. Billy glances up at him and he looks tired.

“I found your notebooks, Billy. The box they were stashed in was all fucked up and they fell out so I moved them into another box and I’m sorry, I know I shouldn’t have, but I had a look in one of them.” Steve blushes. “More than one of them, really. You’re an amazing drawer, Billy Hargrove. I think you made me look way better than I do though.”

“No, pretty boy, you really are that pretty,” Billy mumbles, unsure how to feel right now, but when Steve reaches out for Billy’s hand again, Billy lets him.

“Thank you. Like I was saying, we found that portal at the bottom of the lake and me and Jonathan went in.”

“Byers helped?”

“Well, Max wanted to come with me.”

“What the fuck, Ste—”

“I said no, obviously. Hoo boy, she’s scary when she’s angry, and looks a bit like you too.” Steve’s eyes widen at the memory and Billy can’t help the snort that escapes.

“Shut up.”

“So, yeah, Jon came with me, and we found you where El had said, covered in vines. Took us ages to axe them all off and carry you back to the portal. Then we had to swim up real fast, which, let me tell you, is not Jon’s strong suit,” Steve finishes with a chuckle.

Billy can work out the rest, since he ended up in a hospital bed, but a couple of things are still puzzling him. “Steve…” The name feels still new on his lips but he’ll keep saying it if that’s the way Steve looks at him when he does. “My dad…”

“Ah yes, the model parent. He skipped town the day after he tried to burn all your belongings, I’m afraid. The house was in his name so Max and her mum had to move out. They’re renting a small trailer at Forest Hills, across from Eddie Munson.”

“Shit.”

“Yeah, Max spends all her time with the rest of the kids when she’s not at school or here with you.”

“But why? I don’t understand. She hates me, you all do, I was a complete asshole… and then…” He doesn't want to think about that again or he’ll cry for sure. He’s always crying. At least now he don’t have to worry about Neil finding out.

“Then you saved all of us. Max… um, she told us about your dad.”

“Great.” Billy feels the tears roll down his cheeks and he does nothing to stop them. Everyone knows about him now. They all hate him or pity him, or both, he’s not sure which is worse.

He has no family, no house to go back to, no money, no car. He’s stuck in this fucking hospital bed in fucking Hawkins, Indiana until they kick him out. “You should have left me where you found me.” His voice sounds hollow, even to his own ears.

“Don’t say that. It’s not—”

“It is true. I was better off dead. Where am I gonna go when I get out of here, Harrington, huh? I have no one. Nothing. And my car… Fuck!”

“I told you to call me Steve. And, well, I was hoping you’d come live at my house.”

“Your house? I don’t understand. Steve, why…?”

“Well, for starters, all your stuff is there. Oh, and your car is there, she’s all fixed up and ready for you.”

“You fixed my car?”

“No, because I don’t know anything about cars, but I paid this guy I know to fix her. It was the least I could do, since I was the one who crashed into it.”

“But why would you do that? Steve, why?”

Steve gets off the chair to sit on the edge of the mattress, his hand still holding Billy’s, his fingers moving to link with Billy’s. “Billy, when you faced the monster that day at the mall, I got so scared because I realised I’d never have the chance to tell you how I feel.”

“How you feel about what?” There is no way the fucking tears are going to stop now, not when Steve is sitting on his fucking bed, clasping his hand, his thigh pressing into Billy’s hip. Being so close to the one person he’s ever wanted, Billy can barely breathe.

“Two years ago, Will Byers ended up in the Upside Down.

“Okay…” What? Billy is confused at the change of subject.

“He was there for a week,” Steve continues, his thumb stroking Billy’s knuckles as he speaks. “His mum and Hop found him and brought him back, and he said he hid in the place where he felt safest.”

“Right.” Where is Steve going with this? Billy doesn’t have a safe place, not in Hawkins anyway, and even if this Upside Down is a copy of their world, there is little chance Billy would have made it to California on foot, with monsters chasing him.

“You want to know where we found you? Where your safe place was?”

Billy nods. This is the longest conversation he’s ever had with Steve and the most confusing.

“You were in my room, Billy. In my bed. Do you know how you ended up there?

“That was real? I thought it was a dream. It was so dark, I was so scared and needed to hide. I found your house and that was the only room that felt safe.”

Steve smiles before leaning closer, his arm resting on the other side of Billy. “I’m glad.”

The closeness and the smile on Steve’s beautiful face make something warm spread inside Billy’s chest. “And why is that, pretty boy?” he hears himself ask, looking into brown eyes he hasn’t seen that up close since they played basketball together.

But instead of replying, Steve presses his lips to Billy’s and Billy stops breathing. He freezes until Steve moves back a fraction.

“Billy? Is that okay?”

“Again…” Billy brings a hand up to tangle in Steve’s hair and pulls him closer. Is this what being happy feels like? He feels the tip of Steve’s tongue on his bottom lip and opens his mouth, welcoming him in, swallowing Steve’s moan when Billy tightens his hand in Steve’s hair.

Steve Harrington is kissing him like Billy always dreamed of and he wants Billy to live at his house? Definitely better than being dead.

#harringrove #billy hargrove #steve harrington #billy x steve #dragonflylady77 #happy billy didn't die day

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