#ive been having many realizations and idk if im like. being dramatic or whatever but OMG | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

1d1195 · 6 months ago

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Sam my love I am so glad you’re at a slightly better point! It sucks that you haven’t been feeling well :( I know it’s not easy to just “relax or calm down” but really I am glad that you did take some time for yourself! PLEASE CONTINUE TO DO SO! Don’t feel bad about not posting any new writing too! Honestly if you decided to not post anymore for whatever reason, it’s okay because you're still a person behind the screen. As long as YOU are okay or trying to get there, that is enough! You're never being dramatic, you know your body and feelings!

Ive had such a busy weekend and I started my summer courses today(monday) which is why i haven't been on here as much :( Weekend was busy since I went thrifting and got some new skirts which I am excited about! And I went to a vintage car show! I love looking at older cars but I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT THEM! I just like the vibes lol

I also have not finished the bear yet, I'm only 4 episodes in 😭 and girl don’t get me started on how i think about the whole claire or sydney thing because I feel like I can make a whole ass dissertation on the bear HAHA especially with this new season I have MANY thoughts lol But I do agree that the first episode was an interesting watch. I think that it was an attempt to give some more backstory especially with Carmy’s training but I think that the transitions from past/present were hard to follow. But the changes were very stuble so it can easily be missed. The way I knew was by looking at his hair?? Idk maybe im reaching lol Oh I would cry too! I didn’t grow up with so much yelling and I hate confrontation so it would not be a good environment for me lol I'm also a perfectionist so I simply would die :)! Anyways I'm hoping to have more time during this week to finish it!

How was your weekend? Hows’ the week starting out?!

Sam you're literally the SWEETEST how would I not be nice to you😭?! I love you!!!-💜

I didn't realize you were taking summer courses! I thought you were free! I feel like we discussed that you were and like a goldfish, I forgot immediately 🤦‍♀️ (it's slowly coming back, you're making up for some lost time perhaps?) How long are the classes and are you excited about them? I actually loved my summer math classes in grad school (maybe more than my regular season classes). They were like 👌 the right amount of time and the right amount of work.

New skirts! Are they long skirts or short skirts? Any fun patterns? I also know NOTHING about cars. I would rather walk. The vintage car shows are cool though! (Sounds like another great story meet cute to use 👀)

I just finished ep 5. I think as a whole the season is weird but I'm still invested. I like it a lot. I feel like Sydney doesn't want to part own it. I'm thinking she's seeing Carmy spiraling and she's like "Maybe I don't want to tie myself into him (and the restaurant)" Idk just my prediction. OBSESSED WITH THE FAKS. "How many Faks are coming?" "At least two, less than five." Literally amazing. I think Carmy's obsession is also a little too much this season. Maybe that's the point (obvi, his non-negotiables are/were a lot). Him wanting a new menu every night is a lot for me. I'm stressing about it. I feel like I've mentioned but my bf is pretty into cooking and he thinks Carmy is modeled after Marco Pierre White (I forget his reasoning; even though it's been said The Bear is not based off a real person) but if my bf IS right, it doesn't bode well for Carmy :/ I'm obsessed with the character arcs of some of these characters. Richie and Tina for example. TINA omg I could have killed her at the beginning. What a queen. I'm trying to be vague and also not spoil anything so hopefully I didn't. But I apologize if I did.

Totally agree with you on the perfectionist front. It's rough out there. I would sob into my purees lol

Omg I don't even remember the weekend. I think it was relaxing lol I was so nervous about school stuff. Because of the 4th I'm done with the first week of school so I'm feeling much better now. Mother Nature made her appearance as well and I shouldn't have been surprised since I mentioned last week I wanted to jump into traffic which is a good signal. But anyway, I'm thriving now. Need to do some chores and I'm writing something hopefully to post for tomorrow! I want to read and go for walks as well!

Hope your classes are good, your week is good, and you're enjoying the rest of The Bear LOVE YOU! 💕

xoxo

#💜

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re-pression · 2 years ago

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like. i literally used to think i just was under-sensitive and fucked up in some way where i needed insanely intense stimulation to get off. but. after climbing over the hurdle of being comfortable with Any amount of intimacy with my girlfriend because being any amount of sexually intimate after realizing she like. genuinely cares about me and wants me to feel safe and respected and will never push my boundaries and actually not only desires me physically but also uhhhh Wants to make Me Feel Good???? literally sent me into a panic for Months 🤪🤪🤪 even tho we had literally had sex a few times before we started dating but i had no idea i was actually legitimately safe in the relationship lol...... but like. after finally uhhhhh starting to process the fact that despite being Known amongst many of my friends as "the one who is Highly Sexually Active™️ and borders on kind of a manwhore" lol i had. literally never had sex with someone who really loved me,, we have Finally started having sex again and like. it hasnt been objectively very intense at all in comparison to much of the sexual experience ive had in the past but. it's literally never felt like This before..... like shell have me on the edge with just touching me the right way while i used to think i needed At Least a vibrator or some pretty damn significant penetration going on to get that close. and i dont think shes even doing anything particularly Skilled And Strategic™️ or whatever its just..... nobodys ever paid attention to my reactions and my body and taken their time like this before. like i literally cannot think of a single relationship ive had in the past where ive felt so genuinely. desired and loved. i cant think of a partner thats kissed me nearly as much as she does and we really only get to see each other a couple times a week usually. and its just so much stuff that i was looking for for so fucking long but not even really realizing i was missing. like i had Thought ive had pretty healthy and loving relationships before i was just pretty fucked from the couple that went really really badly, but like. im being made to realize that ive never really known what a real relationship was supposed to be at all. and i told myself quite a bit that i might just be acting dramatic about it but my girlfriend keeps telling me like "no ive also had all my relationships end for whatever reason and get my heart broken and feel a uniquely strong love for you too, but the things you tell me about all of your past relationships and how you respond to things that are supposed to be normal and healthy in any relationship tells me youve never really been treated properly as a partner" and like. idk it gives me a sense of. grief? that like...... even the relationship i had for two whole years with my childhood best friend when i was like 17-19 was perfectly Healthy in like. we got along perfectly and we're best friends to this day and we would like cuddle and shit but also, we only had Two sexual encounters during the entire two year relationship (both of which were led by myself and never really reciprocated though done with consent) and i realized i really need sex in a relationship to feel Satisfied and desired enough and we ended things really smoothly after that and like. 1) never felt the desire and passion i was needing and 2) i literally do not Remember at least 95% of it anyways because ive retained very very few memories of that period of my life For Reasons. so its like. i might as well be having my first healthy relationship ever in my entire life after over a decade of either crushing disappointments, relationships completely devoid of love, or literally abuse situations as my entire experience with relationships and the only other sexual experience i was having was sex work. (no shade towards sex work for the record it just definitely had a major impact on my development of a really fucked view of sex and what it should look like in a relationship in my personal life lol)

idk like i just... maybe im jumping the gun here but ive thought about marrying partners before, but i've never been so sure about it. i never want to know life without her in it again. i fear if i lose her, i'll never find someone so loving and gentle and patient ever again. i love her so deeply and feel so much safety and joy when i'm with her that it scares the shit out of me. every part of me shakes with the fear that this is all too good to be true or too good to last. especially as the longer it lasts, the more my brain reminds me that by the time ive gotten this close to someone in the past, we'd have started arguing or something by now. it's so terrifying sometimes. but i can't bring myself to give into the compulsion to self-sabotage and run from it all because it's even scarier to think i'll never get to feel her hold me or kiss me again

#january 2023

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cipheress-to-k-pop · 3 years ago

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did not realize there was a shipping event, anyway so hello rush my beloved <3 *sorry for how long this potentially might be*

i am fine dating anyone of any gender. what id prefer for this shipping event is dc assigning an s/o and an ex *because what is drama if not angst persevering*

as we have established *more like you and someone in the comments*, i would be a crime boss and eat pancakes. i am an ISFP and my goal in life is being known for being better than (insert icon) at (what the icon is known for) and looking good doing it

my amazing personality is that im dramatic *there is no "over" dramatic 🙄 just dramatic and not dramatic enough* and passionate *ive tried to go on a fist fight 1 v 4 in mcdonalds bc someone disrespected my rice*

on the chaotic, lawful, neutral spectrum.. i am a lawful chaotic *see there's the law, now i know what to do! whether i follow the law is up to the vibes but now that ik it, there's a less chance i get caught* so either blatant disregard or random loophole, depends on the vibes *its always blatant disregard on tuesdays 🥺*

i have the random characteristic of bumping into things and not noticing. *is that a red flag?? well if it was, i didn't see it when/if i bumped into it*

brucey bestie would not like me. he has a kill code, i only follow the bestie code. he's going to court trying to defend someone he arrested, im hiding the body for the bestie behind a random diner, probably seen by a vigilante

random facts that i know are 100% going to affect any relationship, my food is either chefs kiss or on fire *my pancakes always serve, no arguments* and that if you get me talking on certain topics ill either not stop until we both asleep or not start until you do. if my s/o or ex is allergic to pets, poor you. strays of any kind, pets domesticated and not alike adore me to the point that me walking in a room gets them all jumping at me *why do they love me? well why don't you love me too 🤨*

me and any s/o, ex or not, one of us is going to be the simp *40/60 chance im the simp but im the 40 and they're the 60* and if anything, ill probably be the one gift giving. im not good at words or have the time to spend it with you *i split my time between sports, school council, choir, actual class and in the DCU, girlbossing as well* but i have money and i like spending it on things that remind me of my love. i also bake and i think they'd like whatever i make as long as it's not cake *the cake is a 30/69 chance of good. 30 passable leaning to bad, 69 idk what to feel but you did your best*, 1 earth shatteringly good*

a major flaw of mine that might be the catalyst as to why i have an ex is that im honest to the point it hurts *ive said hurtful things because i knew it would cause a reaction and what i said may have been true but i was an asshole in that moment, ill admit* and that i might come off as if im flirting with anyone other than them when really im just talking *I JUST NATURALLY TALK FLIRTY ALL THE TIME, ITS INSANE HOW MANY TIMES SOMEONE THINKS IM HINTING AT SOMETHING*

if no ones in love with me then just say im in love with me because i would 100% be in love with me *but also who wouldn't be in love with me, im fantastic*

thank you rush from the fantastic, amazing, and absolutely stunning *not nearly as stunning as you* - 🌻🥞

Heyy honey bunches, thank you so muchhh!! muah muah, sending you kisses <333 I hope you like it!

S/O: Wally West

Ex Partner: Bruce Wayne (honestly kinda wanted to ship him w u as s/o just for shits and giggles but i have some integrity XD)

#shipping event #anon #🌻🥞 anon #young justice x reader #bruce wayne x reader

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misterbitches · 4 years ago

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Hello! @flootweed replying to the post from before. the long format was killing me. why does tumblr look like this...

I haven’t watched episode 8 yet...or have I? If it’s the most recent one. No.

Is the hornbill a bird? It probably is but I have a terrible memory and I’m dumb so. I skipped the last few weeks because I’m scawwed. How are you liking it? I did see someone say that the hornbill makes sense (without knowing what it is...at all) bc heart transplant patients only live like 5-15 years after but someone in those comments pointed out that he was so young when he got his and that’s pretty rare so he has a higher likelihood of survival. Frankly, this is the only way I will proceed. Since when did shows ever care about the heart transplant health? Never and it needs to stay that way!

What did we think of ep 6? LMAO. I need opinions! And omg it makes me feel special when I can point things out to people because I so...rarely get to LOL. Editing is like one of my favorite things ever so I can be super particular about it but I try to do the thing you do when you’re supposed to see if it works within its context. I’d like to go in with scissors and glue but alas.

THe mic covering....the rustling....it’s like guys...please. Ironically the audio today wasn’t great. I don’t know why. IDK if you watch c-dramas but I am not even sure what’s worse between them because they dub their dramas. But actually no it’s best to have the dubbing because even tho it is painful they have to put a lot of effort into it. LOL.

Right? @ Aey! It’s just weird if they would show us more about what he’s done instead of saying he’s done sth bad and not even explaining that....like you could even do some shitty exposition. I think if he is to be a true villain then we really need to be privvy. All the warnings make it seem like he’s a fuckin’ serial killer so when we get the scene of him at home it’s like....actually this is really serious? Maybe his pain is like...for a reason. Althought you won’t even TELL US WHAT HE’S DONE WRONG BESIDES BE JUST FUCKING WEIRD AND ANNOYING! So from what we have it’s just a realllllllll fucked up sad person lol. god i forgot about the dinner! and i totally agree. he really needs them to succeed. i like your theory because it would make the scene where he like blocks the twitter user make more sense. he also says they dont really know each other etc so it’s realllllyyyyy probable that he just sees it as a way out. if not then we shall pretend u wrote it :)

god yea i wouldnt say it is art but i also guess we technically have to since it is technically. in the way that technically performance artists are artists but mostly i uh technically ignore them. Also one of my fav BLs is called the best twins. If you do not know what it is I will not elaborate further.t

i want to know more abt poli sci majors lmao but they sound DRAMATIC/ hopefully most ppl in ur cohort arent losers!

hahahha i understand. there was just a thing on twitter about DSA and then the day before about reading discourse. the same thiings. over. and over. and over. and over. we are our own worst enemies but also our own best friends? but i hate tankies and that wont change. but hasan’s a decent guy. he said sth abt black ppl during biden’s primaries in GA or whatever and i was like chill. but he’s insecure and has adhd which means ur more open to being wrong and changing otherwise u will suffocate and die.

and totally about hiding fuck ups. i’ve tried really hard bc of organizing IRL to like...be honest, question, etc but also like...approach it naturally? because if you’re trying to be perfect and so worried you’ll fuck up you don’t realize that puts more stress on you, makes you seem like a robot, and could potentially not make you realize the mistkaes you made. also if we’re privileged in certain spaces there is just no possible way we won’t get something wrong. im light and i know that honestly any way to speak up on colorism is going to be difficult and that’s a space where i have power so i just have to figure it out. we should be uncomfortable because we have to sit with unpleasant feelings and sort through our own whatever. that just makes the next time even better and people can trust u more. i think some people sweat it sooo much or maybe they think their personal life and what theyve been through is more the norm? on the other hand people can be sf reactionary in the worst way and idk what their issue is. there was also a user who said sth very inch arresting about tankies which i thoroughly enjoyed (how like violent lefitsts or tankies / ppl who are like ooh a gun whatever just want to be violent in another space so they have shit tendencies from jump and nothing of substance which i think i agree with tbh fo ra lottttt of ppl. like their anger is actually like “no im about to beat that ass” instead of what we actually want to get done)

sort of in the same vein re: taking it easy...we coudl all be more understanding too. to slow it down like you mentioned about not being privvy to fucking eveyrthing and saying anything on our mind. i saw this person talk about y2k which was a huge deal while happening bc it was the turn of the millenium (bruh were u even alive?) but this twitter user grew up in a super super SUPER religious household and was like why do ppl make jokes about Y2K it was insanely traumatizing? though my first instinct was confused ive tried hard to like look more before i judge especially thanks to a friend of mine. turns out that with the further reading the more we found out he was just really traumatized; it was very common in religious households to be afraid of 2000. so we could have come at him with no understanding and he could have thought that everyone had the same experience with that year that he did. his feelings sit precedent though but i think it was just very hard for him to fathom.

i didnt reply bc he didnt need that and what could i have said? he’ll see what the truth is with exposure and unfortunately this was something he really did go through.

and that’s what makes most people think others could be over the top. because it sounded ridiculous but then it was this huge traumatic thing that we could have never known about. so maybe when someone sounds like actually crazy they have an explanation? of course some ppl are just batshit or annoying but that’s anywhere not just leftists it’ just means more i guess when a ~~librul is annoyed~ but it can be easy to want to make fun of ppl too. lmao. basically what i am saying is the internet? especially twitter? for leftists? in this economy? bitch it’s the wild west out here.

i am 29! idk if i said it or not. i am OLD u probably werent even born in the year i was talking about wah. i know not old-old or old at all but compared to you i’m due for a colonoscopy.

omg i hope u can get vaxxed soon! are you wfh rn? i hope ur also not in a bad state as in state state not state as in ur being :| bleh what a fucking time. it sucks that you have to fucking do work. well unless u like school. which i hope u do. i just assume everyone hates it cos i did lmao

was it the lindsay ellis drama? that bitch is dumb. if there was other drama oh wait the drama i was referring to it all happened on the same day. idk book twitter that well but i saw something from someone who was abt that shit and wowie! the american people are not that.....intelligent to put it lightly.

i’ll get better. ppl tell me they miss me and im like aw. i have insanellllyyy bad insomnia and a lot of stuff happened this year HOWEVER I SLEPT FOR TWO DAYS FOR 8 HOURS AT A REASONABLE TIME. im a new woman. anyways you too! i hope ur not too burnt out with school. we just dont know when the burnout is or we just dont know we are burnt out until we are. the panaramiciccici hit and all the things i was ignoring kind of just fell on me and sooo much happened at once. and frankly it’s hard to take care of ourselves. lord.

Like if you aren’t interested in expanding on the issue in a way that hasn’t been done before all you gotta do it like… spread resources and donate if you can. I dont see the point in having to say something about every issue especially if you (not at you specifically just in general) aren’t immediately impacted by the issue. Like is the 14 yr old white marxist named sarah on twitter really gonna have meaningful insight on anti-asian violence ?

this is part of why i cannot telecommunicate. i dont want to do shit on the internet. i am able bodied so i know that this time has been of such ease for other people. but mentally i just can’t. i don’t have a comment on hand like that and i hvae no desire to engage with ppl that way. i am a super super super solitary person but thats bc it’s MY time so when it’s like all this effort with other people i dont ever want to be alone. it’s the same with the way i approach filmmaking. it isnt a sole thing so i hate it not together. that’s part of how u can get so sucked in and repeat doom scrolling. i was in this webinar last may after [redacted] and this black woman prof said “read with a community and talk” because otherwise she said we are torturing ourselves. you can’t carry that weight all on your own. unfortunately i hate zoom, discord, slack, signal, whatsapp, facetime. you name it this panera has made it evi.. L

you make a really excellent point. i think the young young gen zers are really really just interesting because it’s like this whole new world for them with leftist politics and they just can’t grasp the horrors of the world and the kind of freedom being a leftist can bring. and so many people don’t grow out of it. those people so happen to be the “least productive” in terms of how much time they spend IRL withe these issues. naturally, younger kids are gonna have a harder time. they are not as mobile as well so the internet becomes this place. but then it’s this echo chamber. and many times just things posted without sources. and social media NEEDS that to exist.

i think of the irony of leftist kids on tik tok and while i am happy it’s reaching them it’s just....different. very different. the growth of social media is so good but also so fucking sad, it’s too much! i think the point about not writing everything is major. even i have to do this which is part of the disappearing.y ou need to detach and make sure your head is on straight again. but when you think eveyrone has to be privvy to every thought and you can’t just sit back....which twitter and social media doesn’t encourage. you have to join in. that’s often why when i have something to say it is dense because i don’t feel like repeating it. ever. lmao ust ever. i cant pay attn. social media is a fucking minefield for my brain u can get so lost in it and absorb it but once u start talking you may not be able to stop.

i think a big part of that is it not being a leisurely thing but sort of just in our lives always. this sounds like a grandpa rant but ykwim. We dont have to see the same thing over and over again. And eventually it gets sincerely diluted or its diluted bc of capitalism or whatever. Or if theyre very young or maybe they don’t have like the greatest way of sharing the knowledge? then it can be butchered. I hope this is making sense...i’m talking beyoond the boring surface-level milquetoast shit. i see really ahistorical stuff on there from leftists (like this thing about NK + africa and it being a beneficial rship as opposed to a um not beneficial one. and it isn’t. beneficial but this young black girl was talking abt it and noname rtd and i was like it’s just too complex. there’s no good/bad here just bc it’s not america. dont get me started on this.)

but Lol that was kinda off topic but I think what I meant in my last reply about not turning off the voice in my head is about when I consume media, not necessarily when I’m online talking about. Even if I have criticism for something, I’m usually pretty chill when consuming fandom content bc I think being serious online all the time is kinda boring. Like sometimes I’m analyzing theme and shit but really most of the time im memeing.

exactly.........gotta laugh. thats why sometimes im like i cant think lmao. unfrotunately i have been ARGUING with ppl on the internet for rly no reason when i could have replied to ur very nice fun wholesome message. i love torture. i miss memes.

“ i think the people who get the least enjoyment out of that are those so obsessed with getting upset with anyone thinking outside of their lines as if it equates to them “ EXACTLYYYYY

kekekekeke im glad u got it. it’s like with conservatives throwing around snowflake. now im beginning to question who the real complainers are.

LMAO exactlyyyy. i posted a screenshot of this writer from twitter saying that exact thing. Like first of all, I’m...an adult? and if you are as well uh? i’m sorry for you but are we 12? But how is it affecting u this viscerally? And if it does why dont u...do...research? pihgofuaipoajghou but honestly everything u said. we’re trained to go into it with nothing. i was only around ur age when i started to get more serious about this stuff but you’re like lightyears ahead of where i was at 21. did i say this but i’m in iww and literally i can tell u in 2016 i did not think 2019 me would be in a union bc i told my friend in a train station that we don’t need unions. i was 23...but the thing is i didnt know what i was talking about. at all. and i knew i didnt know and she knew i didnt know and now i am the clown.

also yes at critical engagement. i had to learn so much through experience and this is tuff that i coudlnt be shielded from. there’s an empathy you kinda have to develop and this understanding that you move through the world as this person who is “nowhere and everywhere; nothing and everything” so i’ve always had to think about things differently just to survive. that’s also what can drag a lot of people towards it like theres so many black kpop fans bc i think a lot of the pain in SK can be mirrored (sort of) through our history. and theres currently a history now but it had to be forged. uh what was my point oh yea however i wouldnt have been able to move further if i didnt have my background to go off of bc i knew something was off when i started getting into all these things (ill give u a hint) but if i had no prior knowledge and didnt have to think about it then the critical approach is either stale or stupid.

i had to research but i dont understand how ppl are so bold with little to no research and understanding? thhey just inherently know with also like ZERO experience in what they need experience in. engaging critically means “how i see the world” with dashes of trying to be open adn understanding or whatever. actually that’s another thing like being afraid of criticizing things bc theyre foreign to you so u give it a pass (like we discussed) but it doesnt hAVE TO BEEEE JUST REAAAAAD and then take all the info ur teensy brain and apply it. be a normal human being and dont be fucking rude and racist. thats it! u can complain abt literally anything without being a dick.

as we start with LW and end with LW.....what do we think (i asked this already) omg please share wbl thoughts i THINK i know what ur talking about. well it could be two things; their rship when they came back and the physicality and then pei shou yi. i almost dont even want to use my brain to fucking look at that. i think wbl can get away with more bc of visual~*~*~* reasons (like literally, the look of the show. there’s more space to get lost in the frames. many thai dramas are a lot more literal? this isn’t the right word but it’s very heavily character focused particularly bc of $ i think) though good production also underscores flaws so i am also wrong. but like do u know what i mean? u have to kinda focus on it? or maybe it’s just cos like.....ur so used to it in thai bl idek. i’ve seen tw bl ofc.

look i swear i will justify this forever bc there are some things we miss right but if u feel like someone’s a bad actor....theyre bad. it’s about tone movement etc etc etc and since most thai bl productions have 0 interest in that....well. they take these newbies and put them in these situations. we dont understand thai but if we see them and we’re like “wow this is really bad” then they’re bad lmao. IDC i will never be like cos idk what theyre saying NO WHY HE LOOK LIKE A ROBOT???????? DOES HE EMOTE? why is he CRYING WITH NO TEARS? and it’s not even a total requisite to cry with tears(i mean for me it is) but it’s just like what is happening on ur face right now young man????????

painful.

the inflection stuff is very valid ooh good point tho but that’s only a part of the piece. plus we get used to the way they communicate. like the ppl from sotus were prtty bad. i dont like that show but thats an ex of ppl liing the actors and the person i thought was better other ppl dont think that? well apparently hes a shitty guy but. um. so when theres decent acting its so glaring.

although i must say even tho i dont care for 2gether anymore and would never like to be reminded about its existence (only bc i just cringe lol) i honestly....didnt think bright was a bad actor? but people keep saying he is and i am much more inclined to believe them than myself. though i am not often dickmatized that could have been it. until he opened his mouth and ruined it and then i stopped paying attn.

although honestly i’m so much more critical than i could be positive. i have ben stumped for the last day about how i wasnt mad at his acting in the show. is it me? is it him? who’s......the wrong one.....(me)

oh shit they have been denied? i haven’t been paying attn to whats been going on recently. i just got into it on MDL because of snowdrop. sometimes i literally cannot engage bc ill just be like alright well im black so this power button in my head is going off when ppl talk abt that shit. back in the day when kpop jawns were saying some real outta pocket anti black shit (now everyone is slick with it) it’d always be THEY DONT HAVE GOOGLE THEYVE NEVER SEEN A BLACK PERSON but really it’s like no...maybe they are just racist? that’s ok too.

also the past 2 weeks have been um atrocious bc how fucking easily people fell into the pit of white supremacy and started to turn their ire towards black people and making a competition between our groups just like they wanted. it’s not about the women who are dead anymore, who were sex workers, their womanhood, being asian, being poor anymore. it’s about how much black people get attention and why people only pay attn to us. i am not feeling very generous this week for ppl to excuse that hsit.

on a lighter note, ppl say that abt the whole husband and wife thing. i dont know how to explain how angry that shit makes me but maybe it’s because i do not want to think of my body in relation to a fucking penis at all hours of the day. if bls could kindly not do that it would be nice lmao

yes there are a lot of those. who are only there to gawk lmao. and just idk worship bc of the cult of personality thing bc of how weird and open they have to be as actors. some of the others are people who /think/ theyre really smart (i think im asmart but i also think i am very dumb and i have adhd to prove that MEDICALLY!!!) but are actually not? or their observations arent great? or idk if they are they arent interesting? but i think well..........we have more refined palettes :P

jk also theres just different personalities. you and i mesh more bc we have a lot of the same beliefs and are coming from the same place. that makes it easier to understand as well. i really try to remember that but some people are really weird so. again just...the perception of certain things even down to acting skills. but i also dont like.......believe this genre can really do anything at all. on one hand i want them to do it right bc it’s a piece of work so they should. be proud of it. cos most things arent advancing us bc representation and culturalism are a lie bla bla. it’s just that when the depictions are negative or not done well it adds to the problem as opposed to the things that are well done are fairly benign and can’t really pull us back (perf example is the black panther film. i woudl definitely not say it was transgressive as a literal work but visually it’s just stunning. and it’s sad that it’s stunning and surprising but still with basically an all black cast of mostly dark people abd like what it means in the zeitgeist yes. it’s also just a good movie. but it’s still imperialist prop and unfortunately and this is fucking pathetic to say it “opened eyes” in other countries where they hate black ppl and ignore their own racialized minorities HENNYWAYSSSS a better ex is moonlight except moonlight isnt mainstream and is indie tho...still thru a funnel of capital bc a24 but who cares bleed the fuckers dry is my motto. my point is moonlight is both a great work and doesnt bring any failures to the table and its existence helps in ways outside of art but they arent the defining things giving us material advancement sooooo i mean it’s complex (this is my conclusion to everything um guys it’s complex)

er i had one more point in conjunction to above. oh yea so i like dont need all these extra things to make it progressive. like people really want more women in the show and i am honestly like i really dont. i dont want them to actively do this. if they cant do it naturally then let someone else do it. i am not asking for more bc i dont want it from them. when something comes along i embrace it but i do not see why women should be represented when the genre RELIES on patriarchy. there is no complete satisfying existence for the women in these series. i dont want it. i dont ask people to show us~*~* or respect~* like fuck no the people who make it make it and hopefully more will make it in the future but i will not beg bc THEY DONT WANT TO DO IT SO WOULD FORCING IT MAKE IT BETTER? just fucking leave them out entirely. that’s the answer if theyre gonna make nasty female characters then those bitches can geaux. we have other plcaes to be. booked. and. BUSY!

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kinkymagnus · 4 years ago

Note

Do you have nsfw headcanons or just in general about the other Magnus? The one in the other dimension?

you are an ANGEL i was legit about to make a post like “oh... im in the mood for twi magnus porn....If Only I’d Get An Ask About It” *sighs dramatically*

i dont have any specific ideas in mind right now but i just really love twi magnus? and he deserves to be RAVISHED?

so im just gonna Ramble.

like ok first of all i like to think that twi magnus is,, hm, kind of sensitive

both bc a) canon magnus is touch starved but twi magnus was like “haha you are like a little baby” and isolated himself almost completely for like a century without even hookups and shit, so like. someone PLEASE give my boy some affection. (i am using boy jokingly do not come AT me) and b) ok this is bullshit im making up but i do not care. magnus’s magic has just woken up and didn’t he like canonically say it was part of how he felt/experienced the world? even if he didn’t it’s canon now, fuck you, and like..... it’s waking up again and he feels like he’s opened his eyes for the first time in years, or taken a breath of fresh air--

oh my god i just had. the thoughts. on like, adhd twi magnus and sensory overload. like hnngngnffffhghhhhh fuck fuck he has moments where it’s all too much and he’s feeling different things and his magic is both soothing/helpful while also making it worse kind of, and like, he can hide under a bunch of blankets or take a long shower and like i feel like there’s more here but its just not coming right now.... although i do want alec to help him thru this bc living vicariously through fictional characters but it’s fine

anyway ayfkjs back to what i was saying

twi magnus is pretty sensitive and it’s not like he’s actually inexperienced or really even that shy--he’s quieter, and i feel more flustered and out of practice than canon magnus for sure, but it’s not like he’s blushing deeply at the mention of sex or anything. i love the imagery of twi alec, confident dom, being worried on how he’ll gently ease his sweet soft boyfriend who dresses in modest cardigans and the like into bdsm, if he’ll even like it (oh boy would he look so beautiful in handcuffs, or just tied up and begging and helpless, but obviously alec only wants to do that if magnus would enjoy it)... and then he tries to bring it up and twi magnus, who’s distracted, casually mentions his Sex Cabinet(TM) full of toys and bdsm gear

bc he’s not a prude, he was just like.... isolated. and alone. and kind of frightened. but it’s not like he doesn’t know what sex and kink is, or that he doesn’t enjoy it.

and maybe he blushes a little when he realizes what he’s juts casually revealed--namely, that he loves to be tied up and spanked and called a slut or whatever (magnus just casually talking without like really thinking about what he’s saying if he’s hyperfocused on doing something else, like brewing a potion or painting a tarot card or whatever, and alec loves to ask him harmless little questions and just listen to him ramble on--adhd magnus!)--but alec is just like not only are you precious and cute, you’re also sexy as hell and the hottest man alive

but really tho alec’s just like :O because magnus’s collection is even more extensive than his, DAMN. not what he expected. but you know under all those cute thick layers twi magnus is still, and i say this with deep love and affection, a total cumslut :)

also he’s just a deeply beautiful and wonderful person but you know we’re talking about SLUTTIN’ IT UP IN HERE

so like anyway magnus. sensitive. stay on topic this time. alec loves touching him all over and pulling noises out of him, kissing him and teasing him and just generally like... one, taking full advantage of him being sensitive (again this is more jokey and i don’t think alec would necessarily stereotype him like this, but i have this image of twi alec thinking he’s a virgin because he’s so sweet and modest and like, so sensitive, just a few dirty words get him so wet, and alec can get him to cum so fast, so like, their first time with penetrative sex alec is out here giving him the most sweet and romantic first time he can, and like, he would have done that anyway but it does feel weirdly special taking his virginity, even though twi alec, woke bitch, is fully aware virginity is a social construct. and then magnus, in a fucked-out post “just got dicked down so good” haze, says that was the best and biggest dick i’ve ever taken and alec’s like,,,,,,,, ah!) so like

touching him, kissing him, making him cum over and over and over again, and like with magnus’s persmission of course he just loves to fuck magnus senseless and make him orgasm over and over until he’s just a wrecked little mess and he’s all fucked out and whining and incoherent :’)

two, like..... ok idk why but i love the idea that twi magnus at first just... cums kind of fast. like their first time alec slides in (and this is after he’s already eaten magnus out and teased his clit a bunch) and magnus is already coming just from that. and he thinks its embarassing lowkey but alec’s just like 1. you’re cute 2. that was super hot

like literally alec buried himself inside magnus and he immediately came and looked so gorgeous doing it? alec is DOWN FOR THIS.

over time he builds up a stamina again and honestly it doesn’t take that long but like. just those first few times it’s way too soon and magnus is like hiding his face in alec’s shoulder and alec’s telling him how beautiful he is :’)

also ok canon magnus is a screamer and he’s def like... kind of been taught to hold that back, but generally, he’s still pretty loud in bed and with alec it’s not long before he’s confident enough to let himself be

twi magnus tho... he’s firmly like. idk if repressed is the right word, but he’s not letting himself express himself and he certainly isn’t letting himself make pathetic little noises when alec fucks him so like. he’s always biting back loud moans and stopping himself from screaming

but alec starts getting so good at pushing all his buttons (and that first time he came with alec’s dick inside him he couldn’t help the obscene moan he made and alec loved it so much it was so hot) and like, making him lose control that he starts fucking little noises out of magnus more and more until eventually magnus is barely able to stop the whimpers and whiny breathless moans spilling from his lips as alec fucks him and like

after much coaxing, alec taking full advantage of how sensitive he is, and a few small emotional talks, like... they do eventually get to the stage where twi magnus’s inner screamer is free to scream and beg all he wants :’)

but it still comes after a lot of teasing usually and (with magnus’s consent ofc) alec just.. ADORES coming up with scenarios where he gets to like, (usually after tying magnus up) drive magnus crazy with teasing and then basically fuck him so good he “”breaks”” and ends up being a loud little slut the way they both like it, even if magnus feels like he has to be “pushed” or “made” to do it in order to let himself. obviously he consented to being “”made”” to do it and all that, but like a) he just really, really enjoys alec’s methods of “breaking” him (im a slut for alec consensually!!! “breaking” him into being a little slut ive talked about this with friends many times) and b) it just feels... more ok that way, with weird brain logic that makes him more comfortable and less self conscious with being loud and embarrassing like that

also lmao “man i feel embarrassed when im loud in bed because of my insecurities and shitty past relationships. i know! i’ll make it part of my humiliation kink”

i feel like twi magnus has less of exhibitionist/humiliation kink than canon magnus, although he def likes it, especially the humiliation/praise aspect (i feel like those two absolutely have to be intertwined for him to enjoy it tho), which like with. canon magnus it’s like aw, big powerful prince of hell crying and begging like a slut, while with twi magnus he is powerful but it’s less controlled so it’s more about how he’s so put-together and modest and “shy” and quiet but here he is taken apart completely, stripped bare and taking cock so beautifully

but like twi magnus............let him be wooed..........he deserves it... i feel like he’d just be even more into being wooed and just little domestic affectionate things than canon magnus (again both him and canon magnus are the same person in different circumstances and i feel like generally they like the same things, just at different levels, canon magnus also enjoys domestic romance and wooing) but like twi magnus while i think he def would like humiliation kink (albeit mostly in private--maybe once they’ve been married a few centuries he’d be ready for something more hardcore but i feel like he generally would be more private about this, and eventually he might feel safe enough to do that again but like....mmm you know? idk.) i think he would be more into praise kink, and like, while canon magnus is more “mm humiliation kink with a side of praise :)” and loves the praise but also loves alec wrecking him and calling him a filthy little slut and leading him around on a leash, twi magnus is more “mm praise kink with a side of humiliation :)” and he likes alec calling him a slut still but he likes even more when alec strokes his hair and tells him he’s pretty and he’s being so good, and like, he likes being called beautiful and being kissed all over and yes, he definitely like being called a beautiful messy little slut, and being teased, but generally he prefers gentle and soft. that’s not to say he doesn’t want to be manhandled and fucked sometimes, but you know how it is

hey tho one thing canon and twi magnus completely agree on? Being A Cumslut. as they deserve

they love their creampies what can i say (just little! pastries! that alec makes specifically for him!)

but like really tho they both love it

god tho just the imagery tho like.... twi magnus with his cute lil short hair and like his more just overall soft look? and like twi alec, all confident with styled hair and a suit? let them dance! let alec sweep him off his feet and then carry him to bed and they’re laughing and they fall back on the bed and alec’s on top of him, kissing him, and they’re smiling and magnus just feels so happy and loved and alec is just touching him all over and kissing him eagerly, feeling so lucky he gets to have this beautiful man in his arms, under him, in his bed, and like, alec ravishing him, taking off all those layers and finding silk panties and magnus is a little blushy but also like... daring alec to take them off with his teeth you know like ;)

like sure he’s blushing a little (just a little! and like god again the imagery of twi magnus in pretty lingerie just a little flushed but still very eager? aaaAAAAA) but also he very much did this on purpose (not that he could have tripped into them and then gone about not realizing but you know what i mean) with every intent of having alec fuck him in them (or having alec take them off immediately, either way)

also tipsy twi magnus being a giggly affectionate bitch who like has zero restraint and will koala alec without shame. he’s so fucking cuddly. and twi alec, “manwhore” extraordinaire, supposedly the heartbreaker playboy type but secretly a romantic at heart, is just giving him the hugest heart eyes and wrapping his arms around him and cuddling him back (also drunk twi alec just being like canon alec’s wedding vows constantly like just. long eloquent rambles on how perfect magnus is. like, drunk twi alec is just facedown on someone’s couch at a party, monologuing about how beautiful magnus is, while tipsy twi magnus is just snuggled into his side, pressed as close as possible and for once unashamed and not shy at all about this,)

god actually tipsy twi malec--twipsy? lmao--having just super giggly affectionate loving gentle sex tbh, magnus is wearing panties and alec tries to take them off sexily but fails completely and they’re both just laughing and loving the moment and enjoying each other??

also again drunk twi magnus being incredibly cuddly and shameless and loud is amazing to me. he will happily give alec a lap dance, but he’ll also happily just koala him and demand alec be his big spoon. alec is thrilled to see him openly asking for what he wants and initiating cuddles bc he knows magnus adores cuddles and affection but feels like he can’t ask for it, so even if it’s temporary and bc of alcohol he still loves seeing magnus so open about it and like, feeling safe enough to be vulnerable with him on this

also tipsy twi magnus using magic willy nilly and he has a hard enough time controlling his magic normally this is so much worse but luckily he only gets drunk with alec after alec knows so alec is just watching in awe as magnus hums and happily dances around the loft and flowers grow impossibly at his feet

and like also just generally he has trouble controlling his magic like things floating around him absentmindedly, or things changing color, or blue sparks on his hands without him realizing... and like im like picturing alec accidentally startles him and he makes the most adorable little squeak alec’s ever heard and then alec’s knocked back a little so he basically just falls over and not even that hard but magnus is like ohmyGODOHMYGODIMSOSORRY and he freaks out a bit and alec’s like it’s ok sweetheart im fine, i’m not even bruised, and also, even if i was: absolutely worth it for that cute little squeak

AND THE TIPSY SEX THING LIKE ALEC’S KISSING UP HIS NECK AND MAGNUS IS GIGGLING AND FEELING SO HAPPY AND THEIR CLOTHES ABRUPTLY VANISH AND ALEC’S LIKE...........CONVENIENT! AND DOESN’T FREAK OUT AT ALL like magnus has a brief moment of cold almost sober like oh shit what if ive pushed too far and then alecs like god babe youre so talented

and !!! HIS CAT EYES god twi alec had not expected magnus secretly being an immortal warlock would come with sexy cat eyes (of course his brown eyes were also so warm and beautiful and alec loved them) but like he was thrilled they did and distantly he was like should i be more freaked about this? maybe. but honestly he looks so beautiful and he looked way more frightened than he should ever look that i wouldn’t like them, or worse, and that’s crazy bc they’re beautiful and he’s beautiful and i love them

and also he wants to see them full of pleasured tears LOOK I M A S LU T OK

but like ok one last go i just..... twi magnus and bondage, as he deserves,

he like, has been strictly controlling himself and isolating himself and protecting himself so long it’s hard to let go so he honestly really loves it when alec ties him up and fucks him into incoherence, makes him lose control, and like. he gets to be helpless and just let go and feel the pleasure, and alec “”makes”” him scream and beg and take it so prettily, coaxes the sluttiest of noises out of him, and like just

twi magnus looks particularly pretty all tied up and naked bc he’s normally so modest and covered up, so he looks even more gorgeous and slutty legs spread and all tied up, wet and flushed and begging for alec, and alec likes to kiss his little tits and grab his thighs and eat him out until he’s sobbing with pleasure, tease his clit and make him squirt until he’s just achingly wet and sobbing and begging for more, and alec takes pity on him and fucks him nice and hard, fills him up, and just like

again gets him out of his shell, gets him to be loud and shameless and pretty and “broken” and afterwards he’s all fucked out, alec’s taken good care of him and he’s all relaxed and he feels so safe??? and like it feels so good to be vulnerable with alec??? he’s all warm and snuggled into alec’s side and he just. has come a long way.

#trans magnus smut #twi

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tfw-no-tennis · 5 years ago

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hhhhhhxh

more abt hxh bc my last post was too long n i had to split it off holla

so i left off talking abt when gon woke up....i love how polite gon is to pretty much everyone - hes such a good lad all the time. s/o to his aunt for raising him right (tho i think hes also just a rlly good boy inherently too)

also is he named gon bc ging was like ha ha im boutta be GONe lol seeya kid!!!! like ????

i find it interesting that kurapika and hisoka fought....we really havent seen them interact at all yet. also hisoka is so smirk-y i hate that bitch...what did he say to kurapika??????

this poor red shirt old guy lmao hisoka is SO clearly uninterested in fighting him and then he fucking dies. rip mdude

what did hisoka whisper to HIM??? guess we’ll never know #RIPLegend

oh mannnn if killua had just won against pokkle then he wouldnt have had to deal with illumi doing That to him :( my smug son......

leorio is such a good dude....also its so funny to me how tall and lanky leorio is, espec compared to the other 3 main characters lmaoooo

or maybe those 3 are just rlly short??? i mean gon and killua are literally 12, but whats kurapikas excuse

GODDDD I HATE THIS BIIIIITCH. FUCK OFFFFFFF tho the evil piano music slaps. but jeeeeesus illumi is so creepy and awful, and seeing him take off his disguise is not any better a second time...he and hisoka truly deserve each other wrow

does illumi have hair powers??? cause it kinda looks like it. or maybe hes just gay and dramatic

ok but the sick electric guitar riff (?) that played when illumis face was revealed was lowkey kinda hilarious

man i was so wrong abt killua knowing that that was illumi :( poor kid

killua is immediately freaking out and meanwhile illumi looks bored as hell. dude ur the worst

killua: [freaking out] illumi, completely blank-faced: hey

I HATE HIMMMM even tho his catman design is regrettably kinda cute

why do illumi and hisoka both have such snatched waists i hate this

wtf so killua has another different brother??? i assumed he attacked illumi....how many fuckgin zoldyk sibling are there?????

leorio ur too normie for this conversation lmao. also wow fucked up family huh

killua looks so like...small and helpless, which is so at odds from what we’ve seen of him so far :( this poor kid

illumi totally has some weird brain powers man callin it now

gon: wow killuas family sounds wack... satotz: oh lmao you havent even heard the rest

KILLUA ;_;

this poor baby assassin :( :( :(

IMMM INCONSOLABLE. HE WANTS TO BE FRIENDS W/GON.......ARE YOU KIDDING....AUGHHHHHHHH

meanwhile gon decided he and killua are BEST FRIENDS like 10 mins after they met. GOD

like in the recap ep he called killua his best friend ;_; and meanwhile killua doesnt even think they ARE friends god destroy me

this calming classical music is throwing me off vbhjfjhbsdkgndks

i sense that leorio and kurapika are rapidly acquiring a new son

DAMN THIS IS SO FUUUUCKEDDDDD illumi is such a crusty bitch wow. leave killua alone asshole

all that stuff abt killua like, only thinking he wants to befriend gon but really wanting to kill him....that sure sounds like some ‘worst fears’ type of shit for someone like killua....illumi is such a classic abuser wow

i have 2 know is satotz like, repeating this entire conversation verbatim in a calming monotone to gon rn. like....

LEORIOOOOO I LOVE UUUUUUUU AUGHHHH him telling killua it doesnt matter if illumi is his brother, fuck that guy, beat him up as usual and leave.....ooooughhhh leorio is such a good dude ;_;

and the OF COURSE him saying the obvious - that gon and killua are ALREADY friends....i love this, i feel like leorio said all the exact things the audience is thinking...yet it still didnt get thru to killua bc hes so rattled by illumi appearing, and the abuse in general

i think if gon were there things wouldve gone much differently

of COURSE crusty bitch illumi is like oh ok now i have to kill gon.....biiiiitch i hate uuuuu

also that just shows that hes lying to killua (which we already knew obvs), bc if it were inevitable that killua would kill gon to like, test himself or w/e, then why not just wait for that to happen? that would have a much bigger impact on killua than illumi killing gon....its obvious that illumi is just manipulating him, but killua is too BSOD to be able to tell (also, hes 12)

ok bitch illumi is preaching abt not needing friends but he and hisoka are definitely fucking and theyve been teamed up for the entire hunter exam it seems.....what a hypocrite. hate this guy

god im so glad we didnt rlly get to see whatever the fuck illumi did to that random hunter examiner guy’s face. jeeeeesus. also i cant tell but i wonder if him forcing that info out of the guy was the result of his freaky mind powers or if the guy was just like oof ouch pins in me face

LEORIO AND KURAPIKAAAA THE PROTECT GON SQUAD!! and joined by new member hanzo!!! who ironically beat gon up for 3 hours str8 like, a very short amount of time ago lmao. but still i love that sm

illumi u dumb bitch.....tho i dont buy for a minute that he didnt already realize that killing gon would disqualify him...he defs just wanted to get under killuas skin even more :^(

KILLUAAAA ;_; when he goes to step back from illumi but illumi tells him not to....ughhh HATE this guy, leave this poor kid alone. no wonder he wanted to leave

illumi saying theres only 1 way that killua can stop him - does he mean by killing him, or something more specific, like some forbidden zoldyk murder technique?

‘your beloved gon’ wow gay. theyre 12 and theyre dating ok. killua is literally that kid whos like wow i wonder if gon likes me...and meanwhile gon is like wow cant believe me and killua have been dating for 3 months now

leorio saying ‘we wont let him kill you or gon’ ;_; leorio ily sm...thats like the exact right thing to say - hes offering protection and reassurance as an adult figure...unfortunately killua is clearly too freaked out to even process anything outside of illumis gaslighting and abuse

also illumi is defs doing something to killua w/his eyes via his freaky mind powers. js

illumi i hate you stop being weirdly cute. augh

classic abuse tactics, being like ha ha nvm i wasnt gonna kill gon! jk!

killua just shutting down completely after that :( :( noooo

and then he kills that old guy and leaves, ‘proving’ that illumi is right....noooooOOOO

and now we boutta see gon go FULL shounen protag for the first time, oh FUCKKKKKK yesssss

this is the first time we’ve seen gon angry oooh man and of COURSE its on killuas behalf,....im so fuckign emo already looooord

god ok the episode preview where its gon saying ‘do leorio and i look alike?’ YES U DO LOL youre father and son so jot that down

oof, gon and illumi have such fundamentally different POVs on like, family and life and morals, and you can tell by their 4-line exchange before gon does the ICONIC one-handed grab’n’fling

AUGHHHH gon saying hes gonna rescue killua....SO good...he recognizes that killuas family is wack as hell and killua shouldnt be w/them - the classic ingrained ‘found family is more important than blood family’ stuff

tho thats an interesting contrast to gon himself, whos looking for his deadbeat dad

‘but it wasnt his choice’ that so good ily gon BEST boy, hes so perceptive and good......he knows that killuas hand was forced and that he needs to be RESCUED (love that word choice) from his shitty abusive family

of course kurapika and leorio voiced complaints ;_; best parents

kurapika should be a lawyer tbh

leorioooo ;_; such a good dude, saying he should be disqualified instead

HOW is leorio a stronger combatant than that old dude hvbajufjbsja that guy had some moves it seemed, and leorio has,....a knife? a briefcase? the classic premed attitude of ‘fuck it, i could die anytime, lets do this’? like.....cmon vhabjdfjbhsf i refuse to believe this man is of any use in a fight. ill believe it when i see it

pokkle pls ur not plot-important enough to be jumping into this convo rn

tho i am curious abt what hisoka said to kurapika. tho i agree that thats irrelevant to the discussion

gon repeating satotz’s wisdom :’) and saying that killua will definitely pass if he takes the exam again...ough

gon is SO GOOD i cant get over it !!!!!!!!! AUGHHHH....recusing killua from his abusive family and making it so killua never has to see them again is like...so good. what a good good perfect boy.

also thats like, the perfect response to this. killing illumi would just start a ton of drama, and killua would be conflicted abt that....but removing killua from his situation is perfect

ok ive ranted a lot ill talk abt the rest later woohoo

PREDICTIONS:

i predict that hisoka will show up in this upcoming zoldyk arc somewhere bc illumis gonna be in it (i assume) and theyre dating. also hisoka is a central character so itd make sense for him to show up in the second major arc. tho tbh this could end up being completely false and i wouldnt be that shocked lmao

i think leorio is gonna get Big Sad someday bc hes like, so normal compared to the other MCs, and also hes suuuuch a bleeding heart (i love him....) so i feel like thats gonna lead to some sadness for him once his friends start doing crazy shit or w/e

also i predict that if he gets nen itll be like healing nen or st. does that even exist??? idk jack shit abt nen lmao

i think that illumi has hypnosis powers or something, even just based on design alone. it could defs be for aesthetic (character design in hxh is wild), but his eyes look noticeably different from any other characters. also he was doing some freaky shit to killua. also i held this prediction before seeing the part where this is brought up so we’ll see if its right lmao

as for this upcoming arc - ruth and i are wondering if itll be similar to the vinsmoke drama in one piece - character goes back to abusive family, squad goes to rescue them...and then character refuses to be recused. w/sanji it was partially bc the vinsmokes threatened to kill zeff, his TRUE dad, but i predict in this case it could be more like the zoldyks saying ‘look killua these 3 weirdos showed up looking for you, convince them to leave or we’ll kill them’ and killua will be like, oh shit bc like.....think abt it. the vinsmokes targeted zeff (and not the strawhats) bc they knew they could easily kill him. same goes here, i assume - a family of trained assassins vs Good Good Fishing Rod Smell-Power Boy (who hasnt thrown a single punch yet), Lanky Dr Man With A Switchblade We Havent Seen Him Use Onscreen, and Mx 2 Wooden Sticks, Bloodlust, and Arachnophobia - 3 For 1 Deal! its a no-contest. so thats one thing i could see happening, potentially

im way too tired to remember my other predictions rip lmao

#excited 2 see moreeee #lj watches hxh #hxh

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oh-mother-of-darkness · 5 years ago

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answers (16)

Anonymous said: A lot of these secrets are really serious and sad so heres a lighter one: me and my sister are knitting christmas socks for the whole family as a surprise. Ive never knit a pattern before but im really good!!

Amazing!!

Anonymous said: idk if your still doing this but my secret is I fear im a terrible person who only acts nice to rick people into liking her and ik that actually does make me an okay but i still feel im doing it for the wrong reasons and someones going to get too close and find out the truth and hate me

That’s very self aware of you, I think-- probably too self aware. You’re absolutely right to say it’s the trying that matters, but I’m not gonna blame you for worrying about it. I have similar concerns about myself sometimes. I’m aware that for me personally they’re partially justified. Some of my kindness is self motivated.

I think though (and it seems like you already know this) it’s the effect of the kindness that matters. Maybe it’s better for me if I have “pure” intentions, but if I don’t, I should still do the kind things anyway, right? Because at the end there’s still going to be good. And there’s nothing bad about actively trying to be good, which is all we’re doing.

Anonymous said: my secret is that ive been chasing after a dream my whole life but im not sure ill ever achieve it. times running out and i dont know what to do if i cant. i feel like my whole life has been put on standby and i dont know the way out. i know ill be okay in the end but i dont know what the end will be and that scares me.

Shit that’s relatable. You really will be okay, but it’s terrifying in the meantime, isn’t it? To have those turning points bearing down on you?

Things will happen. You can’t stop that. Time is gonna continue, but you’ll still be there at the end. Your head’s already in the right place.

Anonymous said: My secret is that I really, really like one of my friends, but he has a girlfriend and slept with one of my best friends when they were both super drunk. I want the feelings to stop and go back to being just friends, because I honestly think I don't have a chance, but there is a small part of me that doesn't want to let go. I don't know what to do.

Well that’s a bitch of a situation, isn’t it? Romantic feelings aren’t really my area, but I understand holding on to things you consciously want to let go. Emotions always feel like part of me, you know? I don’t want to tear them away. Sometimes it’s better to do it, though. I don’t know from a few sentences if that’s the case here, but I hope you find the way that’s the best for you

Anonymous said: My secret is I used to be suicidal, in my pre/early teens. I had realised I was lesbian in a small, largely Catholic town and hated myself for it. I was awful at social situations and couldn’t make friends. I hated myself for having baby fat because I danced part time. Then as I got older I slowly got more confident until one day a friend died I realised that holy shit I used to be suicidal and I could have killed myself. I’m terrified that I might get like that again and actually do it

Honestly, and I know this is gonna sound cliche, but I’m always in awe of folks like you. I don’t handle my own mental health issues super well most of the time, and to hear about someone growing? Changing? Getting better? Amazing

Anonymous said: If you're still taking these... my secret is that I don't want to give birth to children ever, and would consider adopting instead (when I'm older), but if I were to voice that to any family member or even an acquitance, they would shun me for it and make sure they try to talk me out of it. I really hate how conservative people put so many expectations on my shoulders

Heyyyyyy same. I’m not planning on birthing any kids, but my parents have come down pretty heavily on the single-women-should-not-adopt-children thing, which is.... bullshit. I’m gonna adopt some kids one day, whether they like it or not.

You know your own mind and your own plans. Other people don’t have to be happy about them, even (maybe especially) family members.

Anonymous said: My secret is that I’m a bad friend. I don’t make time for the few friends I have and spend most my time working or being in my room. They deserve better than me.

I don’t think you’re a bad friend. Not being around isn’t bad-friend behavior. You’re not hurting anyone. You’re not doing anything wrong. And I certainly don’t think that it justifies the idea that they should leave you. Relationships are always kinda a difficult balancing act, but you don’t have to be perfect at balancing it, you know?

Anonymous said: My secret is that I'm extremely self-sufficient, I've always had to be. But because there's no one else taking care of me it's so hard to invest my time in others because I'll neglect my own mental state. It make sit hard to develop stable relationships. Every once in a while I re-realize that I'm no one's priority so I have to be my own. And it just sucks.

Shit anon that’s really really rough. It makes me sad with you. I’m not going to tell you you’re wrong, because I don’t know, do I? But I hope you are.

Anonymous said: My secret is I imagine myself as OCs I create for certain fandoms like Young Justice or Castlevania, and I spend all my time daydreaming of how I would act in episodes and how I would interact with the characters. I think it’s because I’m not satisfied with my life, and I’m also afraid that this makes me either weird or crazy.

Oh biggest mood

I do that too. I’m not in a position to say whether that’s a good or bad thing, but I like to think it just makes us creative. For me, it eventually found an outlet in writing, and that’s been a big source of joy in my life. I had some unpleasant experiences sharing that stuff with people in the past, but for me? I don’t worry about it anymore. I know a lot of people that do similar stuff.

Write some fanfiction, maybe :) You might be real good at it

Anonymous said: My secret is I’m secretly attracted to people who are better than me at stuff

That’s not really my area, but seems to me that’s a pretty good thing to be attracted to. One of the sweetest things I hear around school is people talking about how their partners are going to be such good lawyers. It’s cute.

Anonymous said: My secret is that my anxiety is crushing me. I don't want to feel this way anymore.

Oh, anon. I just.... feel you. I’ve been really struggling lately with the idea that other people move through life without that handicap, and it amazes and angers me. Why don’t I get that? Why am I like this? It isn’t fair.

And it isn’t. It just isn’t. You didn’t ask to death match your brain every second of the day. You’re not any worse than everyone else, so why do you have to suffer? I don’t know. I really don’t.

The only happy thing I can say to you is people do heal. It’s bullshit that it takes so much time and effort, but it is possible. I’m better off now than I was five years ago, even if it did take five years and a whole lot of therapy, medication, and energy. You shouldn’t have to fight like this, but you can, and you can win.

Anonymous said: My secret is Im so bitter most of the time that I cant be happy for others. Me and my best friend are both singers but I can never be happy for her when she gets compliments or any success bc im jealous and im scared I'll never learn to be selfless and happy for other people

You’re only human. You have human emotions. You have every right to feel them. The only thing that matters is your choices, because that’s the only thing you can control.

I’m so sorry you’re scared. That’s another emotion you have every right to feel

Anonymous said: My secret is that sometimes I hated myself for not express what I felt because I thought they'll hate me or make distance of me but I'm learning to express my feelings to others and try to be more confidence :) I hope you'll be brave too and do whatever you want to do 💜

I wanna be anon when I grow up

Anonymous said: My secret is that my hands hurt all the time but in different ways, and I’m scared to get help because I’m scared they’ll tell me I’m making it up or being dramatic.

Man do I hate the shit people put you through to get medical help. Everybody’s entitled to ask, aren’t they? So why are we all making that difficult? Why are we making people feel bad about their own pain?

I understand your fear, but I hope you start asking questions anyway. Other people’s opinions about it aren’t your fault

Anonymous said: My secret is that my dermatillomania has gotten way worse since I got to college, so I’m having to wear headscarves again to keep myself from picking my scalp. I smuggled my scarf collection out of my room without telling my parents.

I’m sorry, anon. That’s difficult. That sucks. That’s bullshit.

Anonymous said: my secret is that when one of my family members says something homophobic I'll laugh and agree because I'm afraid that they'll disown me if there's any shred of proof that I'm LGBT and it makes me feel like such filth

That’s not your fault. It’s theirs for making you feel unsafe, because your safety really should be your first priority! That’s okay! You’re not being a bad person by doing it. You’re just protecting someone. You’re allowed to make that someone you

#some pretty heavy subjects here so #suicide #suicidal thoughts #anxiety #depression #mental illness #homophobia #if there's anything else let me know #asks #secrets

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teddy-feathers · 6 years ago

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look my problem with the au megamind where Roxanne is the alien and megamind is the reporter is i cant stop thinking about what i want out of that and how its probably not what other people want out of that which should mean 'oh shit i gotta write it' but really means 'in the next couple of months im going to rewatch megamind and be extremely frustrated because idk how to write these people as is let alone in an au'

but here are some thoughts

Itd have to take place on megaminds home world so like. have to develop that culture and frame it as the usual and other things as oddities

metroman still shows up at the same time the baby human does

roxan richie and metromans rivalry is less of a game and more of a metroman one up'd her ome to many times so now shes gotta take him out

its fine not because shes incompetent- in fact her death rays and pointy sticks are ingenious and have 0% public property or civilian causalities - but because metroman is not only impossible to kill, he adapts to anything that gets close (anything that doesnt kill him makes him stronger literally)

i guess this means theres a good chunk of the story that is centered around human adaptability vs perfect hero dudes adaptability

Roxanne Ritchie is actually a noted scientist or something at the local research facility - i figure blue people planet is really advanced and everyones at least a little technosmart but while it doesnt come as easily or naturally to Roxanne her way of thinking is really unique n shiz and shes an asset to every team....

but if you see her in a mask with some project from the lab macguivered into a gun trying to kill metroman well, no ones getting hurt and humans need hobbies and everyone respects the mask desptie the fact shes the ONLY human on the planet so its not like its hard to figure out who she is

she does spend a lot of nights having to rebuild projects and apologizing and such but basically everyone plays the plausible deniability card and asks her questions abiut what went wrong and okay so the masked menace failed after you let them steal our project but lets pretend for a moment the goal was to fix crops how would you say this did? and grumply shed revamp the guns weird side effect into an alien pollinating crop duster or whatever

got carried away when REALLY all I WANTED to say was

Whille Roxanne Ritchie is adaptable ingenuity and gets away at the last minute NOT because no ones trying to catch her but shes just that CLEVER and thinks ahead and shiz....

Megamind is the guy trying to interview her in the middle of a fight like he thinks he's cute - i mean he is but shes chasing after metroman and skids to a stop because this jerk stepped in for a comment. or shes lining up the perfect shot but theres a close up of megaminds reporter bag in the way

the thing is that maybe... blue people arent violent. a natural disaster hit recently and theyre coming back from it and if the two adopted alien kids want to play extreme tag well no ones getting hurt and Roxanne Ritchie will grow out of her competitiveness no doubt caused by just how superior EVERYONE on the planet is by finding her own niche and metroman will grow up and stop bating her because maybe he IS still better than everyone else and thats met with "oh very nice we're proud" but it doesnt really validate him or make him feel special because its just treated as a special thing he can do by everyong but Roxanne Ritchie and once he's found something that makes him feel good regardless of the attention or lack of it he'll stop playing too

but megamind? megamind has an imagination that loves drama and blowing things out of proportion and thats part of why his reports are so popular? like yeah everyones treating this super hero showdown with indulgence but megamind is good at framing theatrics so that this news story is actually a compelling narrative? and also everyone can see the tension is going to have one of these three "kids" confessing live someday

and maybe he gets carried away. one of those 'aw well next time you could do x or y' or has some technological creation that accidentally actually makes Metroman flinch during an interview

and Roxanne Ritchie starts paying attentionto him for the first time.

and minion warns him but he doesnt listen. minion is lower class and is afraid of being replaced like a pet like some people do but Roxanne Ritchie Ritchie doesnt have a minion and even if she did theyre Best Friends not like those other blue people minion uperclass people.

and he carelessly says something unforgivable and Roxanne Richie uses his ideas and actually succeeds in killing metroman

so she goes to prison - a place they had to build just for her because this hasnt happened since stars knows when

and somebody else is doing the camera because minion left just is gone and megamind looks defeated but testifies against her and is quiet and subdued and stpps being a reporter for a bit

and.... idk. i feel like we'll have to resolve the whole class system so minon goes underground and finds other minons who are unhappy with the way of things and if theyre ALREADY rebuilding society after that huge natural disaster that DIDNT blow up their planet thanks TO a minion well ehy cant they fix this too?

so theres a rebellion going on and theyve got a secret weapon to make blue people listen and idk but i feel like it's Metroman

and... how do stories like this go ive forgotten

minion wouldnt tell megamind or he would

metroman would break Roxanne Ritchie out of prison during the first riot of the minion revolt?

they talk and compare why they hated eachother and slowly work together and are actually a great team?

and then they need a reporter to make themselves heard as something other than minions going crazy

and so of course they go to megamind for help getting the story out

something something megamind is minions sidekick for this adventure

"Roxanne Ritchie was raised by the planet and turned against it and instigated civil unrest and killed a person who was also the good child etc etc instead of just growing up to face your problems"

"actually im alive and i finally found my place? helping out the real heros?"

"i mean i did try to kill him, but he forgave me and we're kinda working together because planet of moms and dads that raised us? yall actually are the ones who need to grow up and let go of the traditions that dont serve etc etc"

and megamind does a huge public apology to minion

and... uhhhhhhhhh fuck i really dont know how these storyies go

the blue people start making amends

metroman basically becomes a social worker for minion childern because finding their original families is a bit hard and most of these kids are just going to end up being raised by super dad but at least the rebellion minion families are actually geting to be their own family units and in a couple gens thatll be normal

Roxanne Ritchie goes back to being the token human in the lab and hangs up her super suit and is generally dissatisfied with this

until one night a hero breaks into her apartment to make her answer for her crimes and so for a legit hot second theyre fighting and megamind says something and Roxanne apologizes and then fighting stops being an argument and goes into banter flirting

the worss "where theres evil good will rise up to fight it" peob comes up a lot in this fic in different iterations

anyways megamind isnjust basically like hey wanna do this like. for the rest of our lives dramatic battle showdowns like its entertainment but like no theyre doing this for real?

the answer is hell yeah

and its a polyship and sometimes Roxanne is helping with the kids and then Megamind bursts in to "save" the family from her evil clutches and 90% of the time everything is improve

megamind kidnaps Roxanne to make metromind save her and a good half of the conversation is that hes an idiot for coming shes tried to kill him three times this week and hes bitching because do you know how hard it is to find a sitter for 30 odd minion kids this short notice and they better make it up to him

Roxanne is not superdad but the 30 odd minion kids adore when she comes over because they mob the villain so hard until finally mega comes to save her because hes actually very good with the kids

of course this poly ship isnt complete without minion and at some point minion and mega realize theyve actually been married for years and Roxanne and metro tease them shamelessly for it

minion and his race need a real name obviously

when Roxanne was a... graduate her senior project theses thingy was essentially "im going to go back to planet earth itll be great ive figured out were im from and how to go there in a reasonable amout of time" and everyone had to sit her down and explain that unlike metroman they knew where she was from the planet was just destroyed.

they never figured out where metroman was from because his direction sharply changed to follow baby Roxannes course and mirrored her coding despite very obviously how he had originated from elsewhere

this is important because his race is basically coming to conquer the blue people planet soon - the group finds out - and will download all the survival upgrades metroman has gotten to become unkillable and then just come down to the surface and be unstoppable taking the place over and whiping out the planet like theyve done many many times

a good chunk of the time trying to figure out how to stop them when this planet is REALLY against murder war and violence for good reason and even if they WOULD do that its impossible over looks some alone time that leads to megamind and metroman figuring out how to like kill him so when the bad guys show up theyll go "whelp better not fuck with them" and leave but between roxanne and minion they manage to not only stabilize metroman (Roxanne blood transfusions maybe???) but they manage to scare the aliens so bad they tuck tail and leave speading rumors that these are the scariest mfs in space (go minion)

metroman never lets Roxanne live down saving his life

eventually space humans show up to check the place out

megamind loves everything human despite most of the planet thinking theyre primitive and showing it

roxanne is reluctant to meet them at first but then really relates to them?

for a good long while it REALLY seems like megamind and Roxanne are just going to go on space adventures with the humans leaving metroman and minion - who really doesnt like them and also they kinda rub him the wrong way because he's non bipedal and they kinda make fun of him in a 'we totally dont mean anything by it lighten up' sort of way.

they don't go of course but they may have stolen a lot of atar charts n shit and who hasnt wanted to take a road trip through space with 30 odd childern who will need names and personalities and may be chopped down to a slightly more reasonable number by this point?

metroman loves space karaoke and his natural abilites mean he learns languages fast but no he still cant carry a tune

megamind and Roxanne still duke it out on various alien cityscapes

minion usually breaks them out of jail if theyre not to be let out the next day because nothing was actually damaged that didnt belong to them.

one memorable occasion it was metoman in a fight with megamind and they wont say what its about but both look very put out and minion looks smug

it doesn't matter in the end because Roxanne teams up with the childern to propose to them first

apparantly i had a lot more ideas about this then i meant to? i mean its not well thoughout out and despite the drama a good half the fic is just going to be cute relationship building stuff between the four of them

#megamind #megamind au idea #story idea #fanfic idea #my writing #i hope tagging shit makes it findable but x doubt

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mvement · 2 years ago

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24/1/22

you know what. ive tried a lot of things. ive practiced, for however short or longer periods, many things. chronologically, ive given one or many tries at capoeira, ballet, acoustic guitar lessons, muay thai, street dances, and now volleyball. ive thought a lot, many and many times, about how i shouldve started doing one of those things earlier and dedicated myself to it, but im not sure i did want that. i mean, maybe i did and lacked the perseverance, but i can't remember. im not sure i cared enough for them, and if i did, well. theres no use in self guilty tripping now. but lately ive been realizing something truly, truly important. as obvious as it might be to anyone else, what's vital when learning or engaging with something new is practice. ive always had it easy with some things; ive never had trouble with grades, for example, even when i barely studied, and always caught up quickly enough whenever i slacked off a little too much. im not sure if this is the cause or only something that goes hand in hand with this next other trait, but i wasn't used to working hard on anything. if i wasn't immediately outstanding at something, id just quit it and think it wasn't for me. it's a little wild, and something ive first noticed probably many years ago, but only more recently - a few years, and every day more than the day before - started to stop taking things this way. something like that narrows your life and experiences in a very expressive way. especially if the things you quit are things you enjoy.

im not an immediate natural in any of the activities i mentioned. so of course, im not naturally outstanding in them either. i cant remember how i was with ballet, how i felt about it overall - i was only four when i started practicing it, and it lasted a year. it was the same with capoiera, but i have a guess i was a little bit scared of it, as i still was - still am, even if significantly less than before - when i first started muay thai (thai boxing, idk what its called outside of here) four years ago.

playing the guitar or any instrument is one of the coolest things in the world a person can have the ability of, honestly. i always liked whenever i mastered a song well enough for it to be recognizable, and i loved playing it, because its such a cool thing. still, i wasnt too keen on the process, and all the songs i actually wanted to learn were so damn advanced too. (muscle memory is, indeed, something a little wicked- i had those classes ten or eleven years ago, and i still remember the chords and everything to the songs i played the most. not relevant to the topic of this rambling, but whatever. who wants to hear me playing banana pancakes by jack johnson)

with muay thai, things were really different by the time i started. i had just realized i absolutely fucking needed physical activities to properly function as a human being. not exaggerating in the slightest - i'm someone else when im not doing anything. it's very, very dramatic. but it’s true. anyways, when i joined my first class on a random day, got in late for the warm up and ended up nearly not walking for a week for the first time because im a little insane and just showed up in that room and tried to keep up with everyone else immediately, it was with the excitement of doing something new and the knowledge that i really needed to do things. after a while, even if i still daydreamed constantly of being a badass and of just quickly escalating to a bruce lee woman reincarnation level, i knew i was enjoying the process. as scary as it was to join those sparring matches my teacher had everyone do, the exhilaration after working so heavily was just that - exhilarating. worth it all. addictive. and god, i was terrified at first. so defensive. with the eminent danger of a punch square to your face, one does that. you’re in there, quickly cornered against the net, and your every move is clumsy and held back, focusing too much on the fact that you’re just scared as fuck. eventually, though, you're taking advantage of a good landing right to your black belt teachers unprotected left temple on instinct. yes im gloating. yes it was one time. shut up. in all seriousness, you do accomplish exciting things. all in all, evolving and seeing change erupt right from and through and in your own body, to witness that with your own eyes and with a sense of wonder at you had just done... it's insane.

it's the compensation that knocks you over sideways for an entire day, and with a continued dawning of reality, you feel it in your whole body that you actually did that.

and im talking short period accomplishments. the day i achieve a black belt level, i will sprint through walls

as for dancing, ive loved it since i was fifteen. i watched that famous upgrade u choreography by willdabeast adams on youtube and i was gone. through there i found one of my favorite dancers, someone with a style that blows my mind every time. it's one of those things i have to work on or i will regret for the rest of my life. i love it dumb, and with my whole body and soul.

volleyball is the most recent of it all. it is actually not even a week since i first practiced it with an actual experienced amateur team. of course it all began not even a month ago when i was elbows deep into haikyuu episodes and just felt like starting yet something else and then asked my friend where she practices volleyball and if i could join. now here i am.

i meant to make this a full circle text with a concise conclusion wrapping things up, but im tired and i already did talk about what i came here to say. practice. its incredible, too, standing in a big court with a tall as fuck net and being initially so terrible at everything. but its because i want to that i keep doing it until i get better. its because of the excitement of just doing it in the first place. it's addictive, the power of doing something you like, of failing so incredibly and still have the will to do it more and more and more. it’s about finding out where life’s meanings are in for you, and realizing dedicating yourself to them is undeniable.

#diary #from the drafts

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snekdood · 2 years ago

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Ive heard some people say that "masculinity is the default for everyone so thats why people dont recognize you as your assigned gender" and idk i gotta disagree?? Masculinity is the default, yes- but is it the default for everyone? Id say its the default for what the default type of person is considered, which is often a cishet white man. The default for those whom have womanness pushed on to us is dresses and heels. I am subverting expectations somewhat when i dress in pants and a button up shirt, but thats old news, thats what feminists did back in the day, however, its that exact association- the association with the cis girl feminists who rebelled against the norm, thats been locked in with ppl afab. When i wear pants and a pixie cut and act more masculine- im seen as a subversive, cool, hip, feminist woman. Thats the most that im allowed. Its not the default for afab people, but its accepted at this point, and is now more or less a default clothing style for everyone however its originally designated for the "default", cis men. If it were the end all be all default, though, we wouldnt still have tradwives about, now would we? Plenty of people still think women should be in the kitchen wearing dresses with their mouths sewn shut. That is still the default many people *want* me to end up in. So now, me wearing pants is just me being "a rebellious woman". That is the two extremes to many people and they only ever allow themselves to see me on either end of each spectrum. They never allow themselves to see me creep over to the spectrum of man. Im only either a traditional woman or a woman thats "trying to be different" to them. Unless im capable of passing as a man and they dont know im trans by default and i have to reveal it to them for them to realize "women" can become men, but id think only extremely passing trans guys could ever get away with that, and even then, when they find out, theyll start eyeing you up and down and pretend to notice parts of you that actually reveal that you're afab, in spite of not seeing it there before, as if i said the magic words that suddenly *unveiled* my "disguise". And once again im locked in the role of woman for them. And once you're locked in that role for a lot of cis men, you cant get out of it, because theyve found a million excuses to not listen to anything "women" say. You minus well be mute. Ive only ever been treated like a human by cis men like this when they dont know that im a trans man and think im cis too.

No matter how hard i try to prove my masculinity, when i dress as a man people have to dismiss it as me being butch. I can never be a man but just a female version of whatever man they think im trying emulate. Im a masculine man? Then im a butch. Im a sporty man? Then im actually just a cool tough tomboy sporty girl actually. Im an expressive and artistic man and it shows in the way i dress? Then im just an eccentric alt woman whos more willing to bend my gender expression. I can never just *be* a man. I only get to be the "female" version of whatever man they think im trying to be. Im allowed to dress like a man, im even allowed to be a butch woman in plenty of cases for cis men, but im never allowed to actually identify as a man. They see it almost as me playing pretend and playing dress up when i dress masc and when i cross over that border of manhood then suddenly i crossed over into accepting my life as being a half goat demon man or whatever. Suddenly thats when things get serious and its code red and everyone has to hit the deck and start doing their best effort to get me to Not start identifying as a man and stop living as if i am and stop trying to get ppl to recognize me for who i am. Im allowed to dress however i want insofar as people can think im just playing pretend.

And bc its old news for afab people to wear pants n shit, I also sort of feel like a lot of cis people see amab people becoming feminine as more dramatic of a change than it is for someone like me to be masculine, which makes me seem like a tomboy or whatever to them. Me dressing with pants and button ups and such is seen as this ~whatever~ thing because im allowed to explore my gender expression so long as i dont try to claim to be an entirely different gender. However, since it is such a dramatic shift for amab people in cis ppls eyes, and because masculinity is seen as so prized, people will assume that if an amab person decides they want to be a woman then that means she really means it, because "no truly masculine man would do that" or whatever.

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midnightmisadventures · 2 years ago

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Guys im really losing my mind here

i dont feel grounded i feel SO WEIRD

i feel like the dream realm has been kicking my ass to get ready for ascension and even though i feel like im interpreting all the messages and doing good at releasing the lessons it makes me feel flustered

idk why

swipe up to npc grills to see me try to describe my dream from 2 yesterday. It was insane, i knew i was dreaming, it was so long, im pretty sure i was talking to a spirit guide. It also heavily involved Oliver but NOT in a good way bro lmao. And then when i woke up Oliver watched my snap story for the first time in soooo many months. Borderline a year. I'm flippin out??

Then today i have a dream where im back on the schtick of "saying goodbye to state college" and that era of my life. And i was putting up a fight in the dream,

also.....in real life i PROMISED myself that if im EVER distressed in an elevator situation, and im on a fucking cruise. I MUST drop whatever im doing. And jut fucking go to the top deck, prove that the water is mf real. Probably by myself

Now here i am last night dreaming that im on a cruise of some sort but also trying to get my stuff from my old whitecourse apt and priscilla is staying in my room and all this shit

and suddenly i was having a panic attack, running to different elevators which are all broken, trying to find my way back and i cant and im freaking out. In the elevator i was like.......wait is this a dream??? wake me up now!!! fully thinking im just being dramatic like i thought it was real life so bad what the actual fuck. And part of me was like, hey u promised yourself youd just drop everything and go to the top. And i was like "but this is real life this isnt a dream" maybe later, maybe after everythings settled.

that reoccuring concept really gets under my skin and im mad at myself for never realizing its happening. I get that its trying to say that i cant take everything from my past with me, and that ive got to be willing to go by myself into the unknown and i cant fight to go back to old ways even though it feels safe and comfortable and what i want at the time

i just feel jostled. To the point where i wanna text liam and be like hi, r u feeling this shitstorm in the 5D? its making it hard to focus

#happy veterans day

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misterbitches · 4 years ago

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@flootweed

ATOTS

That's super fucking romantic? Like tragic but in a nice way. i love that shit. i'm a monogamous slut for romance pghiosuag even tho we have to learn to live alone too but it's just like the NOTION is nice?!??! awwww i told my mom that SOPHIE's gf was like "she died taking a picture of the moon" and how it was like idk. the gf was just processing it and she thought it was romantic and my mom was like "wow.....depressing" bc think she thought it was stupid millenial shit i was like no mother doent u see she died in the BEAUTY LMAO but then i told her jessica walter's husband died the year before and then she died and she was like "aw...kind of romantic" LMAOOOO i guess two people have to die. why did i tell this story? i am so sorry. the show ended today right (ep 10?) i didn't realize it was that short. so i hope it was a happy ending? (tell me) i understand why you love the atmos! it's like, not really been done. there's this BL that i hear isn't too great but it does take place in a rural part of thailand and there's way less budget. a lot of ppl seem to like it. ep 6 LW / LW in gen gotta be honest, rushed through it. i knew spoilers from jump cause BL spoilers are just absolutely nothing and sometimes ur just like i need to know. i do not understand the ~silently lookin 4 u~ trope it always backfires and is also DUMB. so happy about tiffy. a girl who likes girls but ends up with a man bc of mommy and also the man is ok....it's me. she's gorgeous and actually [h*lf] gay so it's great. god ok i feel so old again. lmaooo but i was like obsessed with lady gaga for that reason (dont ask...also how i got kinda popular on tumblr way back in the day) and shes just absolutely fucking beautiful and bad ass. (which kind of doesnt helpcos they r all skinnty but that's FINEEEE) right? i mean like i guess cos we knew abt it? i can see why he was so pissed off, too? i mean i'm so fucking like...sensitive to being told what to do so i was angry for him from jump. i guess i was also looking at it different wholetime cos i knew the spoilers? i'm assuming u did too lmao. so we knew hed be pissed and leave. and frankly that's what sib gets. just for you my friend i will watch it and update. i think MANY times in shows in gen but it is something you notice a lot in BL bc they are just absolute novices most times. in this case, gene's actor mostly well (and i like him as a person just cos he was on that thai 3 girls in a car show and used to date on eof them lmao) can act so i will look over that scene to see how sib's actor plays off him. but the pausing in between sentences or for so long even decent actors or actors doing better. kao is not bad, not great so they will talk slowly because dramatic acting but the problem is most times it's too long. even if the person is an adept actor it won't always work and YES THEN THAT MEANS THE EDITOR COMES IN AND SNIP SNIP SNIP! it's too long. and sometimes it just does not work even if you can act. but it is GLARING when they cant or are average (someoe said this about tharntype and my god lmao tharn..is...so...slow...in...talking...the actor idk his name it's one of em, the other one with the nose (type) is....different not better but he certainly does not talk as slow. they arent bad but they are not good so.) also sometimes they are forgetting their lines. some ppl find this charming. clearly we do not lmao. what is their relation? what is going on there? i don't have a problem with stepbrothers as long as they didn't grow up with that sibling bond. many times blended families really have to watch out for that kind of fraternizing but it's always when theyre older and teenagers bc they didnt grow up w/ each other....i mean they have chemistry so i'm whatever. but. hennYYWAYYYS.actually it's bc im an idiot i didn't read it as Mhok (singular) and aey's father. Yes and his sister who i think i may hate? im like bitch okkkkkk but. his name is lhong. and he is a psycho. i mean so is type. so. oooh it could be that he stole! but also i'm pretty sure cos hes gay lol or did they

not make that explicit? the thing is i had to skip through most of that scene too because the drama was WAY too much for me. too much. lmao. the sister thing i got and it made sense and iliked that. oh yea he is gay and they know. that's a big one.

WBL

haven’t watched color rush! did you like it? i have seen wyel, parts of mr heart, and ofc to my star :)

ohhhhhh ok. i get you. yea he definitely wasn’t being ooc cos i think that....what u said. and also like....ugh i cant even think rn. i like sam lin a lot so i like gao shi de but i gotta say. lmao. hm. first of all. yes it is creepy what he did. it’s fucking weird. and sad that his whole life revolves around him. it’s not as fucking weird as LW but still like when he did the door thing. i was like UMMMMMMMMM cos i really didnt want it to be constructed. and when it was i was like imma suspend my disbelief. but if anyone dared...

and so what he did in s2 i think he just couldnt realize that he was loved back which is why it’s good he WAS ALONE for 5 yrs imo. but he gave shu yi 0 choice and for that i am pretty sure i would be even angrier. i do think though that the father’s role is pretty important but i can see how the show is like....letting that go? bc as fucking weird as GSD is, he was still like...20? i guess and shu yi’s dad is like. crazy? i am also like he really had to fucking start a company to get noticed like are u joking? is it also that easy? and also why? lmao i just. ugh. i think that probs bothered me the most...priorities.

i like the show! well idk if i love it but sure. i think it’s decent lmao. i understand what you’re saying. for here it bothers me less but i certainly don’t think it was OOC. immature and stupid but like...that’s.....what they are. i also don’t have a problm with the timing from a technical point.

however, when i started the show? i had NO clue what concept of time it was. and that was very annoying. tehy redeemed it bc of the comedy aspects (the first time shu yi sees shi de is so fucking good, i really loved the shot and editing; it’s hilarious and silly) and i started to go with the flow of the show through that. but the fucking concept of time in the show in general esp with repetitive outfits (i understand that they are more likely to wear multiple outfits as well, it’s just that you have to split it up or it i sconfusing visually and looks like the same scene twice or just a full day of shooting which it could be but then something should change in the clothes. this is just an ex~~*~*) and partof that is they have this already controlled narrative i guess.

i have to admit as well...i skipped episode 1. and most of 2. i was like i rly dont want to see someone slap a pereson even if they were like. not together. it’s just not cute also not in front of ppl. and then when they were yelling and bla bla i was like listen ladies lets calm down. too much angst in a boring way. what they have now is good. also they should probably like estrange the father but i doubt they will.

i cannot make up my mind totally now bc i see what ur saying i guess i just don’t feel that way as much but i guess i have to think about it more, too. i do think he was contorlling in getting him or like when he didnt want shu yi to find out whwatshisface liked him. i guess for me it would be if he is still that way in the rship. but even tho he’s at fault for what happened, i’m also like but his dad? but also like...did he try? why did he just stop contacting? but then i guess he emailed everyday? DO U C MY QUANDARY.

alsoi have to say i do not care abt their backdoor being opened lmao like wow business? no thanks

LMAO. did they cry a lot in UWMA? i only know the teamwin parts. which one is fluke the really pale one who died? idk what it is about that kid but i just cant watch him. it’s not his fault it’s mine.

DUDE i still dont understand the husband and wife thing and ive looked into it multiple times. ive kinda just classified it as one of those things that make me uncomfortable but arent problematic lol. it you have any insight about it id love to hear it tho !!

it’s stupid. that’s what it is (husband and wife.) it’s just something they say like many gay couples may use pejoratives in conjunction with them, the f word etc. or even imply something about being a top and a bottom. whatever. but these arent gay spaces or gay storylines. sure gay men may direct them but since BL operates and relies on patriarchy without a doubt and also stereotypes poorly kathoeys or won’t cast trans women in anything substantial and use them as jokes (and see this is one of those things where it’s like...ud never see this in the US tho like our concept of third gender or kathoeys but life stillBOOOOO.) so it’s just useless when they put it into the scripts because it’s for people to consume and lots of girls are. obviously. so the idea that if you are being penetrated and u r the wife and this is used like literally anywhere but not from gay or whatever men is gross. are cis women’s vaginas sieves to them? are trans women not women? do we have to categorize people by PHALLIC OBJECTS IN OUR BODIES SPECIFICALLY A WOMAN? it dont make no sense. plus really most ppl just experiment, there’s more ways than one to have sex, we have lives so most times it’s not just full penetration for hours anyway. it’s just so gross. like oh that’s really funny lol ur the wife cos his dick goes in ur butt XD i get it, same. i say “i’m wife’ whenever there’s a penis in me. fucking kill me. it’s not a big deal but it’s just dumb and gross. if they use it they could try and subvert it too like i like how my engineer has a whole absurdly stupid episode about it. but in TT the dad says “if ur the wife i wont accept it” and i was like u know what gals? im good. goodbye.

pgojaihousgajigko THAT’S SOOOOOOO OOWIEOFUGHOIJ WEIRD. FANDOM IS REALLY WEIRD. i have read rpf and written it once upon a time but dont do it anymore uch. i mean it’s weird. no doubt about that. invasive, weird, strange. but very unreal anyway. it is. plus i dont like celebs or fame and think of it as a gross capitalist scheme so i had to stop (also so weird?) but i know very many people like lean in. lean in. LEAN IN. this youtuber i watch did a video on like insanely popular ships (like that 1d one) and their insane fandoms and i just couldnt. it’s so embarrassing? and then they’re so bold????? about it?

yea it would be cool (more queer men or visibly we should say or like out whatever.) but it doesnt necessarily mean that will be good or beneficial i guess? i mean like. i dont know. so much about the genre is about wish fulfilment for young girls. its literally selling some fantasies because the other thing is for BL (i read a paper on this...) esp for girls in more conservative societies they cna maybe replace themselves in the character? but they may not feel a threat as a woman or like their life will fall apart if they engage in sexual things with anyone really. and that’s where i’m like....for a lot of these are they just writing a story and just replacing two men? bc they also seem to think it owrks like that. and in a way that’s what it is bc of the writing and how they use certain terms. you can tell the piece is about pushing a product and less about the real affects of a story. i think ITSAY is a great example of a really intelligent great piece of work that contains multitudes. and the girl was amazing. it just depends on the goal. and for most of the ppl the goal isnt...to do anything. so i dont know. idk how to talk abt representation anymore. it both is and isnt.

i really liked tingting from my engineer a lot (idk if u have seen) she’s so fun and unapologetic. i love how much she drinks and if someone tells her to be ladylike she says no. and i appreciate that in the show when girls were rude to her she said nothing about the girls but said “NO IM NOT LUCKY TO HAVE ALL MALE FRIENDS?” i really want to see her more in the next season. obviously tiffy is goat. super excited to see how their rship develops.

#we best love #lovely writer #we best love fighting mr 2nd

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renaroo · 8 years ago

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Wednesday Roundup 15/6/2017

So this is a day late but in my defense I had a ridiculous amount of comics to get through with no one to blame but myself here. And you know what? I genuinely enjoyed almost everything. But does that mean every comic was good this week? And even so what did I think was the best?

Honestly I don’t know how to write these intros for people who wouldn’t be here to read my opinion anyway so let’s just jump into it.

Marvel’s All-New Wolverine, Marvel’s Amazing Spider-Man: Renew Your Vows, DC’s Detective Comics, DC’s Gotham Academy: Second Semester, DC’s Justice League of America, Image’s Motor Crush, DC’s Superwoman, IDW’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, DC’s Titans, IDW’s Transformers: Salvation, DC’s Wonder Woman

Marvel’s All-New Wolverine (2015-present) #21 Tom Taylor, Leonard Kirk, Cory Hamscher, Terry Pallot, Michael Garland

Okay I need this issue to reread a million times over because there are just so many things I love all at once. Like, oh my gosh. I was almost in tears multiple times because relationships! Healing! Supporting each other!

Wade and Gabby alone could just about make this issue perfect, but then you have Laura and Daken hugging and worried about each other, and Old Man Logan being likable for the first time in any of my readings of him. There’s so much I enjoy, though I find the cover rather deceiving. This is much more of a Howlett family reunion than anything else, though I did enjoy Riri’s parts in it.

I just eriously adore these characters and it meant a lot to see them all come together like they have here and that cliffhanger HURT so much more for it.

I will nitpick the art a bit because we’ve been doing so good about keeping Laura in the Wolverine costume which is much preferred to her X-23 wardrobes, for sure, but this issue it pretty much looked exactly like one of her old costumes without the midriffs and it was kinda weird. I know she took off a lot of her armor for skin contact but it’s... idk. It was weird.

The main thing I’m happy about though is that as we go on, I realize that literally all of the Marvel books I’ve kept are going out of their way to not involve themselves in Secret Wars and it’s kind of beautiful. Laura and Gabby are stuck on an island that’s quarantined (and I can pretend Wade’s there with them instead of whatever’s going on since I dropped Deadpool for the summer crossovers, thanks Tom Taylor!), Moon Girl and Devil Dinosaur are literally off world, and the rest are non-616. So yay me!

Marvel’s Amazing Spider-Man: Renew Your Vows (2016-present) #8 Gerry Conway, Ryan Stegman, Jesus Aburtov

For those who don’t know, Mary Jane Watson is genuinely one of my favorite Marvel characters and is easily one of the reasons I ever stuck with the Spider-Man comics for as long as I did was because of my interest in her and wanting to see her and Peter.

I can also thank her for my genuine attraction to redheads probably.

But one of the main reasons that I’ve loved this book so much is because, as written by Gerry Conway, this is the Peter and MJ of my dreams. I love them so much, and the complications that comes from their relationship and from growing older, raising a daughter, and MJ’s desire to continuously be the glue to keep both Peter and Annie together logically causes her to seek out a way to continue being Spinerette without syphoning off Peter’s powers.

It’s almost like growing old, having a stable relationship, trying to keep things fresh while raising a kid, are all dramatic and worthy of good storytelling in their own right or something HMM.

Anyway, yes it’s completely on the nose where this is going and it’s a little curious how MJ’s not immediately aware of the connection between what’s going on with her right now and the horrible, arguably traumatizing experience she and Peter had, but who knows what’s canon anymore lol

Basically, I sideye a bit from a story point of view, but this series continues to make up for it with the real thing that matters to me: these characters and their development.

DC’s Detective Comics (2016-present) #958 James Tynion IV, Aluaro Martinez, Raul Fernandez, Brad Anderson

Honestly I really love the slower issues where Tynion takes more time to make moments for the relationships between the characters and give us interractions we didn’t know we wanted -- Kate going with Luke and Jean Paul to a basketball game, Cass and Clayface being adorable by reciting a play, Bruce at a poker game with a bunch of assholes in homage to Almost Got ‘im!? It was a lot of fun honestly.

...

Okay I take issue with Cass’ dialogue. I know she was repeating lines from a tape and such but it’s weird to see her make so much progress when just two issues ago she was almost monosyllabic. Like... I want to see Cass gradually learning, I want to feel her frustration with hitting walls, I want to see her struggle and achieve despite the struggle because that gradual progression was honestly something we weren’t delivered in the former canon. We have a great opportunity for it here.

But y’know. I’m particular with Cass and it’s hard to say where her baseline for reading and speech even is in this canon because her dyslexia may be in tact but her circumstances growing up are completely different. So I don’t know.

Now. I’m a sucker for Bruce and Zatanna team-ups because I’m a schmuck but I’m really excited for next issue. Had a lot of fun with this one. This feels like a decent pace for Tynion -- at least in my opinion.

DC’s Gotham Academy: Second Semester (2016-2017) #10 Brenden Fletcher, Becky Cloonan, Karl Kerschl, Adam Archer, Massyk, Sandra Hope

This comic is speeding toward an end and I’m not sure if I’m ready!

From the beginning, for me at least, the selling point for Gotham Academy has been just how much these kids felt like real teenagers and real friends with all their various relationships and connections, platonic or romantic or something in between. And it’s powerful to see that coming to play as an advantage to completing Olive’s arc, but also as a disadvantage since the consequences of many of her actions hurt that much more.

I’ll save a lot of my thoughts for a complete wrap up of the series but overall, very happy and very grateful for the continuously good read that is GA

DC’s Justice League of America (2016-present) Volume 1: Road to Rebirth Steve Orlando, Jody Houser, Ivan Reis, Andy MacDonald, Stephen Byrne, Jamal Campbell, Mirk Andolfo

WE GOTTA GET THE BAND BACK TOGETHER. WE’RE ON A MISSION FROM GAD.

In all seriousness, I’m a huge fan of Vixen and Ryan Choi as well as a big fan of Justice League International, as it was in its 80s glory. So my interests with this particular lineup were piqued from the beginning and I made myself wait for the first volume to dive in.

For the most part, this is a team gathering exercise. Characters that have lacked the spotlight in the last few years -- Vixen, Ray, Killer Frost, and the Atom -- were given whole issues to reintroduce them to this continuity. And honestly those issues were great. I really, really love the updated origins for them and feel that they’re a good blend of honoring the past of the characters as well as adapting them for a new world.

Lobo, Batman, and Black Canary took back seat, but considering that there were already tensions showing within the group, I think it’s safe to assume that giving the spotlight to the rest of the team won’t always last this long. Things are nothing if not explosive among these members.

I really did mean it when I said this is a team gathering exercise, because there’s no first case to unite everyone. There’s not any real antagonists or team-ups we see to speakof. It was just getting hte jLA together.

And for me it’s enough to get me intrigued, though I’d completely understand if people told me it was far from enough for them.

Now they just need to add Big Barda, Booster Gold, and Ted Kord and I’ll be satisfied.

Image’s Motor Crush (2016-present) Vol. 1 Brenden Fletcher, Cameron Stewart, Babs Tarr

I was not the biggest fan of this team’s Batgirl team though I appreciated the aesthetics and what not. There just never seemed to be a storyline that really interested me and I couldn’t be sold on the characterization for Barbara. So I kept hearing about Motor Crush for the last year and was really itnerested in it so I wanted until this volume came out and.

Well, quite simply, I’m in love.

Tell you what, those biker gangs that kept coming up really confusingly out of place in Batgirl make a hell of a lot more sense now that I can see this team’s actual passion project.

So I love Motor Crush a lot, I’m really invested in Domino, the mystery that is her origins and the powers of Crush itself. I love her relationship with her ex, Lola, I love her father -- I love just about everything and the cliffhanger really surprised me.

I will say that while I love having a world that speaks for itself rather than constant narration, it’s a little hard to follow this world entirely, I’d like a bit more explained than what has been, but at the end of the day I’m very excited to see more.

DC’s Superwoman (2016-present) #11 K. Perkins, José Luís, Ray McCarthy, HI-FI

You know, I have made it clear that I’ve been worried about this title for a while now, really just hoping it was going to find its direction and wow us with the great potential that is the Super Family outside of the main Kent triad. And I feel like that’s for good reason -- the end of Jimenez’s run let a lot of people feeling justifiably scorned, there was a mishandling of a lot of heavy and important subjects that were raised, and at least the initial stuff with Perkins taking over kind of left one wondering if they had a fully formed direction to go toward next.

But I am really glad that I stuck it out for this long because the family of John, Lana, Nat, and everyone else is so important and so fundamentally different from the dynamics found elsewhere in the new familial renaissance of the DCU that I needed it. And I hope it continues to emphasize these relationships and how important they are to each other.

I’m still unhappy with how anxiety and mental illness is being handled in the title and find it lacking since it was brought up to begin with and now being ignored. That subject alone is making me rethink my disinterest in Green Lantern books as a whole because I have loved and felt inspired so far by what I’ve seen of Jessica Cruz and their handling of anxiety, and it’s why I picked up Silk at the high recommendations of a close friend.

So I’d like for mental illness to be treated better in this title -- the least it can do after bringing it up and treating it the way it did at the end of Jimenez’s run, but there’s so much value in the non-nuclear family dynamic of the Irons household and of the uniqueness of Lana’s powers and her approach to fighting crime that it’s worth it. For me anyway.

IDW’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2011-present) #70 Kevin Eastman, Tom Waltz, Mateus Santolouco, Ronda Pattison

I knew the end of this storyline was going to be, at the very least, explosive but wow, WOW I had no idea how many twists and turns it was going to take in that time. That was a phenomenal ending to the Mutanimals storyline for the time being, and I just feel so bad for Slash, down to my core. I’m so worried about him, and whenever he will be allowed to recover.

At least I hope he’ll recover.

This series is seventy issues strong and i’m just so blown away by the way they still manage to keep me on the edge of my feet while so many different storylines and character developments are happening at the same time.

I mean, I even feel for Old Hobb here!

I do suppose a complaint I could hold here is that the titular turtles themselves have ultimately not been very front and center throughout this storyline, and that really showed in the conclusion, where for the most part they were lost to the colorfulness of the huge, colorful supporting cast that has been developed over the years.

For me, personally, I think that’s honestly okay. We can’t have the same story over and over again with only the main four characters driving the narrative, and it’s been a long standing tradition in TMNT for a good 30 years now to sort of embody the concept that our main guys don’t really look for situations to get involved with but sort of fall into them naturally.

Not to mention it’s probably a strength that 70 issues in, we haven’t once repeated plots or stories or put any of the characters on a loop of development to end up right back where they started. I don’t think the achievement of that can be understated, especially as we near that landmark #75!

DC’s Titans (2016-present) #12 Dan Abnett, Kenneth Rocafort, Dan Brown

Bleh. BLEH. I was holding out judgment on the twist of Wally and Donna and Roy ending up in some kind of love triangle because I wanted the context but honestly the context is kinda... bleh. It would be awesome if we lived in some world and time where Donna’s origins were not constantly retconned and thus the source of her characterization in every run of every thing she showed up in. Which is by no means a new problem but still.

And my opinion is... Wally and Donna are both going through a hard time and Wally is having to accept that his life is fundamentally different from the previous world he knew, that he can’t just badger people into returning things to the way they were -- especially Linda, who he loves but it’s a very one-sided relationship as a result of the parallel universe paradox and stuff. It makes sense to me that in a ploy to gain some sense of control over that, he and Donna both would try to take fate in an unexpected direction, into their own hands.

But making it a love triangle with Roy just kinda keeps my eyes firmly rolled into the back of my skull.

I overall like Lilith, Dick, Garth, and Karen’s development and characterization in this issue. I think they’re taking Lilith in interesting directions and I’m really curious about what her omen means for the future, since apparently there’s a traitor among them. And they set up plenty of reasons for various members to be that traitor in this issue but I can’t help but assume already that it’s going to end up being a twist. Good twist or not remains to be seen.

IDW’s Transformers: Salvation (2017) John Barber, Livid Ramondelli

I’m going to be completely “original” here and say that I’m not a fan of Ramondelli’s at for the various Transformers comics. i know! I know. Shocking, never said before, completely going against the general fandom consensus. I’m such a brave soul. I know.

Okay, joking aside though... I didn’t think the art was bad in this one-shot. Actually! I’d argue a lot of it was even good. He may not be my favorite artist and I’ll think that his colo gradients are butt ugly most of the time, but there was better handled action sequences than usual, the characters looked like they had weight, and we even got a range of expressiveness in the characters that is... well, frankly, not usual for Ramondelli.

So other than that shocking revelation, I thought Barber performed good once more on tying the TF universe together again, answering some prior plot points and nicely knotting off loose ends. Trypticon being a Titan is not the biggest revelation in the world, but the development of Sandstorm and the Dinobots was great, and I loved just how devious Starscream truly is under Barber’s pen even though I’ve fully been enjoying the characterization for him in Till All Are One.

But the most important thing of all: SPARKLINGS. SPARKLINGS. All I’ve wanted for years is baby transformers so I am HAPPY BEYOND BELIEF. THEY’RE NO LONGER A DYING SPECIES AND THESE PRECIOUS BABIES COULD BE BORN WITHOUT EVER KNOWING THE CIVIL WAR AHHHHHHHH

DC’s Wonder Woman (2016-present) #24 Greg Rucka, Bilquis Evely, Romulo Fajardo Jr.

WOW! I mean, just wow! What a resolution to everything. I have so many emotions for Diana, for Barbara Ann, for even Veronica Cale of all people. Etta and Steve were great, the art was amazing.

It’s just such a relief and such... honestly just an amazing feat that Greg Rucka is beginning to wrap up this just phenomenal run of Wonder Woman

I really enjoyed how everything turned out and it was so remarkable to see Diana’s resolution to save Veronica but also to not turn her back on her friends and loved ones as well as the torment it is for Barbara to not be able to get into Themyscira after all her life’s work.

And I liked Diana’s assessment of Veronica at the end, it was true and also blunt to the point of cruelty. But fitting also.

It’s amazing what a turn around I’ve personally felt when it comes to Veronica’s character because in all honesty I was not a fan of her most of the time in the preboot, but Rucka really has fleshed her out and done something unique with her perspective now. There is tragedy but there’s also less deniability for her fault in all of it.

I’m sad to be coming toward Rucka’s end on the run, but I’m also so happy to see the love and passion he’s put into everything culminating to what it is now.

This is a genuinely hard choice but I think if I go by what tugged on my heartstrings the most, what gave me the most joy overall and just feelings unrelenting from start to finish, I would have to say that my pick of the week is All-New Wolverine. I adore this series and I couldn’t be happier with this issue and how they’re keeping my precious Marvel girls faaaaaar away from Secret Empire. A close second would be Wonder Woman but really I would happily recommend my entire pull this week. It was a geat week for comics.

But that’s just my opinion! I’d love to know your thoughts. Agree? Disagree? Think I missed something I should’ve picked up this week? I’d love to hear from you!

#Rena Roundups #SPOILERS #Wednesday Spoilers #All New Wolverine (2015 )#Amazing Spiderman: Renew Your Vows (2016 )#Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2011 )#Detective Comics (2016 )#Gotham Academy: Second Semester #Justice League of America (2016 )#Superwoman (2016 )#Titans (2016 )#Wonder Woman (2016 )#Motor Crush #Transformers: Salvation

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unrrrreliable · 4 years ago

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08.06.2021

so much stuff happened

i dont even know where to start lol. actually ive wanted to come on here a few times but i didnt know the password but oh well.

so to summarize all the stuff thats been happening/has happened this past 8 months: 1- school, no friends (in my class), same shit. 2- my dad got drunk on february 5th and got stuck in the fucking park at like 23.00 and my brother and i had to call security to open the gate and then we also had to call the police and the ambulance because he was too drunk and aggressive. and 3- i had this fucking piano competition on march 21st, got the 1 prize which was reaaallly wide as in a lot of people, even those who didnt really deserve it, got it. basically it was really fucking stressfull since i was practicing the wrong way, didnt make huge progress, wanted to stop and cried a lot. but hey its been a month (the 2nd and last part was on may 8th and it went pretty bad because i got like 5th prize. i know i competed against ppl who are in university but i still couldve done better and anyone who comforted me knows that. i also went to the therapist a few times. is it helping? well i cant say that it isnt, but yk. at least its someone i can talk to.

right now i still have to practice for my piano exam which will be on june 24th. its going fine ig, although i didnt study properly for like a month. thank fuck tests are done bc i seriously couldnt do any more of that shit istg.

to be fair whats worst in this precise moment is my school situation,. not academic, but social. so as you know, i havent reallyyy tried to be part of the boy group in my class, as in i dont really talk to them, mostly because i just have no idea of what to say to start a conversation so it gets really akward. but today my mom came into my room asking me if there was a cena di classe today and ofc i said no bc no one had invited me. but then i remembered that yesterday a few ppl were organizing something for today. i think it wasnt only the 4 guys but there also were some girls but im not sure. either was, not trying to be dramatic but that kinda hurt lol. like i know i dont talk a lot in class but what would it cost you to invite me. but whatever. i also cried 30 min ago. it felt good afterwards tbh. but i still kinda feel like shit. its just the fact that this whole school year ive been really fucking lonely. not 0 friend lonely, but generally in class i would be kind of a loner. like i only talked to the two girls who sit behind me and who of course have their own friend group, which they have had since middle scjhool. my middle school friend group basically dismantled since two of theme are in one class and therefeore formed their own group, two others went to another school and another one, which is basically the only one i talk to daily, is in a different school. and honestly we dont go out that much anymore because i stopped writing. i realized that i was the only one who would ever call them so i felt that i was being kinda clingy or maybe i just didnt get the message. anyways, i know that i couldve tried harder and actually get in the group but idk, i just didnt care. obviously it sucked to be alone and i knew why i was and what i had to do in order not to be it anymore, but idk why i just didnt try enough. so yeah this school year sucked ass. at least im changing classes next year.

one of the reasons why i didnt really bond w them is that were just different people who have different tastes and interests. they talk a lot about video games and football, which i have no understanding of. generally every interaction i have with them is really akward. but still i feel like and know that i couldve tried harder. what sucked is that all my friends are in other classses and formed their own friend groups and are just moving on yk? it kinda tore apart the friend group but im happy for them. meanwhile i was stuck in that class. not many friends tbh, never went out and still never go out. wow nice im crying again.

tbh what really sucked was going home at lunch or after school alone and seeing wveryone with their own friend groups. and yes again, i know that i could have waited for them or just tried to conversate with them, but whenever i waited for them or tried to catch up they just walked faster (not on purpose) but it was impossible to even squeeze myself in so i was just like whatever. also what really sucks is that they (plus another guy who literally is always hanging out with his girlfriend) are the only guys in my class. and i cant only hang out with girls cause yk.

i also miserably attempted to form a group which consisted of me g g v and v. it failed because g and g started getting all bitchy and viscious and i was like ok then fuck off. plus theyre always w their boy/girlfriend, and v is always w g. and i literaly have never even had a conversation with v.

but im so glad m exists. shes one of my best friends. i really like being around her, talking to her, i like the way she just lives life and is up to anything. also she’s always there. i just love her so much. not in a romantic way though. i also really like f but she hangs out with her boyfriend every satuday, which was the day we used to hang out. i still love talking to her and being with her. those are basically roughly the only two people i hang out with. like i cant really think of anyone else except for my old middle school friend group with which the last time we all hung up was in march. 3 months ago. i hung out w a, in the middle of april i think. but that was it. so of course we dont hang out regularly. also, i havent gone out for the entirety of may, which again i know is my fault, like i couldve asked anyone in my class. the boys dont really go out tho, bc i know e only hangs out w his out-of-our-class friends. and tbh i feel like if the 4 of them went out he would invite me (questionable?). but idk. but again, i really like hanging out w her, acc we went to milan on friday. it was really nice. we both enjoyed it a lot. theres still something i wanna say about her but my mom is calling me so i have to wipe out my tears haha

see ya

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