#its time for my man kal to get railed long and hard-

[oneshotprincess]

i love u chunky batman and twunk superman

[thatonewhoree]

This is my first time posting so yeah.

-I’m sorry if he’s a little out of character this a bullet farmer x reader smut so if you don’t like that then just don’t read it.-

Being Kalashnikov’s wife wasn’t the easiest thing in the world especially when he left to go help the Immortan with something. You were in charge while he was away and it was a job in it of itself. You had to make sure the workers were actually working and that the people would actually listen to you. Being a woman in the wasteland was hard because barely anyone would give you to same respect as a man. Being his wife did help a lot though because it meant you were the queen.

It had been three days until Kalashnikov had finally return from whatever the Immortan needed help with. You could see him from the Peacemarker; he looked pissed.

He got out of the car and was heading towards the house; you’d guessed that he’d seen you from the balcony. You came inside from the balcony and when to sit on the bed hearing him coming up the stairs. He opens the door and closes it behind him entering the room.

“So what happened?” You asked as he began to undress and get into comfortable clothes.

“Joe lost his prized breeders and me and People Eater had to go after them with him. It’s all about babies with him.” Kal said as he finished changing into a white shirt and boxers. He sat down beside you laying his head on your shoulder.

“You know he wants a healthy son; you can’t blame him for that but he can go off the deep in with this stuff.” You say to him as he holds your hand.

“So how has everything been doing over here?” Kal says he looks at you in the eyes.

“Everything has been fine just a lot to handle. We started drilling in a new spot that we think will have more resources for making bullets and guns.” You says has you start to lay down on the bed.

“That’s great. I’m glad you actually got something meaningful done unlike me.” Kal said has he laid back with you cuddling up to you and laying his head on you chest.

“You helped the Immortan with something he thought is important so you did do something meaningful.” You said as you ran you finger though his hair.

“I guess but I swear all he can think of is getting someone pregnant. We live in a fucking wasteland and all he can think about is getting the next thing he sees pregnant! He’s so annoying when comes to that. He used to kill anyone who got in his way now all he does is think about healthy babies.” Kal gets off the bed and begins ranting on about the Immortan while walking around the room.

You sit up and listen to him yell about his friend. When his finally done you speak.

“He doesn’t have anything else to do other than worry about having a healthy boy. He’s an old man, Kal.” You said as he stops in front of the bed.

“I know he’s old but still its so fucking stupid. You don’t see me trying to get you pregnant everyday.” Kal says placing his hand over his face.

“Well you could start.” You say under your breath.

“What?” He looks at you taking his hand off his face.

You realize what you had said not completely regretting but you still didn’t want to said it again.

“Nothing.” You said turning away from him.

“No, you said something.” He says stalking over to you.

“Why should I say it again if you know what I said.” You stated as you crossed your arms over your chest, looking up at him.

“Because I said so, little girl.” He says as he pushes you back on the bed and pins your arms above your head.

“Fineeee. I said you could start.” You answered looking at him in the eyes. Those crazy eyes that make you feel like the smallest thing in the world. He was standing between your legs while still having your arms pinned over your head.

“That’s new coming from you. I remember the first time we did anything and you threatened to cut my dick off if I got you pregnant.” He said laughing at the memory.

“Things have changed plus I didn’t realize how good you were.” You said as you wrapped your legs around his waist putting him closer to you.

“So are you going to just stare at me or are you going to fuck me in the mattress.” You said feeling him grow hard on your core.

“Going be my little whore today, I see. “ he said letting go of your hands and going down to suck on your neck. You ran your fingers through his hair has he began to start biting at you. One of his hands when under your shirt and began to play with your nipples. You pushed him off of you to put your shirt off; you could see the crazy in his eyes. He never really hurt you but his eyes always told you different; evil, crazy man. He pulled his shirt off as well; scars from dust wars, and backstabbers from the past. You moved so he could get on the bed and get better on top of you.

He goes for your chest first; the feeling him suck and lightly bite is almost enough to drive you crazy. You run your fingers through his fluffy hair again; the bullet teeth were weird at first but by now they were a new normal to you. You wrapped your legs around him again bring him closer to you. His cock was so hard against the thin material as he began to grind down on you. Your patience was being tested by all the foreplay but it had been awhile.

“Please hurry up and fuck me, Kal.” You moaned out as he stopped playing with your chest.

“Have some patience, my little whore. I only left for three days and you already can’t wait for me to rail ya.” He said as he got off of you to take off your shorts and underwear; he did the same to himself.

“Those were three long days, Kal.” Before you can add anything else, he flips you so you’re on stomach. You get on your knees and turn your head so you can see him. His hands slides over your slit feeling how wet you are for him. He slides two fingers into you then pulls them out only to use your wetness as lube for his cock. He grabs your hips as he lines his cock up with you; without warning pushed his cock into you while harshly grabbing your hips.

He gives you a minute adjust to his size; he was good length but not the kind that took you an hour to get use to.

The first thrust felt like heaven to you as you let yourself go and bounce on his cock meeting his thrusts. He grabbed your hips harder wanting to leave marks on you. He loved watching your ass bounce on his cock; watching his cock disappear inside you then reappear. He was going to busted if he kept watching that so he pulled out of you and threw over on your back. He was being rough with you; it wasn’t new to you but normally that only happened if he was in a bad mood but this was different.

He puts your legs over his shoulders as he lines up with you again. He enters you again harder and faster. You can’t stop from screaming and scratching at anything you can find.

“You’re so tight, girly. “ he says as he thrusts into you harder. You can tell he’s almost there and it’s getting harder for him to hold back.

“You want me to cum in this pretty pussy of yours? Put a load in ya so you’ll look like a breeder. My breeder. My wife.” He asked as he wraps a hand around your throat and slows down with his thrusting.

“Yes!” You screamed out as his hand got tighter around your throat.

“What was that, girly?” He asks as his other hand goes down to play with your clit.

“Yes! Please I want all your cum, please Kal!” You yell out even louder.

“That’s what I like to here.” He says as he goes hard and fast with his thrust again. You almost there as he plays with your clit even more; you can feel his cock pulsating inside you.

You come moaning out his name as your pussy milks cock for every drop of his cum. He comes soon after you and gives a finally thrust before finally pulling out of you. He lays down beside you and you cuddle up a little with him. He takes a minute to caught his breath before saying anything.

“Are you sure you want to have a baby?” He asks looking down at you.

“Well things are good right now and you’re getting old so why not try to have a little family.” You says as you look back up at him.

“I guess you’re right but just tell me if you change your mind.” He says as he runs a hand though your hair.

After a few minutes, he goes to sleep and leaves you to think about the whole thing before you finally going to sleep. Maybe having a kid wouldn’t be that bad.

-thank you for reading I really hope you enjoyed it☺️✨-

[alisonembers]

Cogs and Queens (Eberron Fan Fic) - Week 8

This one was a bit hard to get out, due to easter.

Content Warning: Course Language, Depression, thoughts of taking one's own life.

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Google Drive Link for correctly formatted version with NSFW content: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1j5vZqlNF-Vz-6zmDOT7fjOiCZ2vy9-kT/view?usp=sharing

Mercury looks over the railing edge in the heavy rain, seeing the sky bridges extending below. Their chest aches as they grip the railing tight with their mechanical arm. I could throw myself from here. One hundred feet down… The storm cracks through the sky, the city tops lighting with a flash. Mercury looks up, the rain washing over their face and soaking their hair as the cold bites them. My face soaking… Nobody can see the tears.

“Come on,” Tal says. “They could be here any moment.”

“Yeah…” Mercury steps away from the railing.

“You okay?” Tal asks, loading a rifle.

“Fucking great,” Mercury lies.

“Okay. You go up the catwalk. I’ll swing around the front,” Tal says.

Mercury nods and begins walking for the catwalk. Though the temptation of death was enticing, the possibility for a pardon and not being harassed by the watch was a reason to live. Besides, one of the greater sky bridges would most likely use a spell to reduce my falling speed.

The sound of crates shuffling inside the storage facility echoed.

Mercury sneaks up, placing themselves against the wall of the building next to a window. They peer in, their pistol unholstering, held to the left of their cheek.

“My brother, it is so good to see you,” a warforge says to another.

“Likewise. You will be happy to know that I have enough for two full suits.”

“Is it good enough to plaster onto ourselves? You have the right parts?”

“That is what I’m saying! I have already removed the innards. Go ahead, wear it.”

Mercury watches one of the warforge pick up the hollowed-out head of a dead man and stretches the skin over its head. Lord, what the fuck.

“Ha ha, you look like a human, brother.”

Mercury aims the pistol at one of them. And I thought what I was doing was bad. Just before Mercury pulls the trigger, a third one brings in Tal, dragging him along by the collar. “Oh fuck.”

“We have another body to use, my brothers!” it says, throwing Tal into the middle of all three of them.

Tal gets up, punching at the closest one, and misses.

“A fighter this orc man is.”

“You will be a fitting skin for my stee-” The crack of gunshot echoes through the facility, blasting one of the warforge’s heads in two.

Tal rolls towards the one that was shot, grabbing his rifle back. He points it at another but takes a foot made of iron to the face.

Mercury crashes through the window, glass spraying the inside of the building. They fire twice more at the closest one but miss both shots.

It charges Mercury, with inhuman ability leaping up onto the catwalk. It knocks the pistol aside out of Mercury’s hand and grabs them by the shoulder. “What are you?”

Mercury wraps their tale around its leg and tackles forward, knocking it through the catwalk's railing, landing down on the ground with a hard crash.

Tal gets thrown across the room by the other one, slamming him into shelving. He gets back up, holding his shoulder. “That all you got!?”

Mercury starts punching the warforge with their mechanical arm repeatedly.

The warforge throws Mercury to the side, and stands up, their wrists rotating in a full three-hundred-and-sixty degree turn.

Mercury runs back towards the shelving behind them. Just as the warforge leaps in a lunge, fist in the air towards them, Mercury swings a long steel pipe forward with their mechanical arm, impaling the constructed man. Its eyes flicker with a sad glow before it falls limp.

“Get – The – Fuck – Off – Me!” Tal says after every punch to the face from the last warforge. Mercury runs over and tackles them to the side, latching on, but not good enough as they are propelled further.

Just as Tal raises a metal pipe to beat the warforge, the doors slam open, and the guard begins rushing in. One of them uses a lightning spell, shocking the construct in place.

It screams in pain as the lightning fries their internals, and the guards begin tieing it up.

Mercury hoists themself off the ground, watching it happen. They instantly begin walking at a fast pace to where their pistol fell from above. They spot Tal talking with Captain Damon Vanhoutte, watching a pouch of gold fall into Tal’s hands. They pick up their gun from beneath the catwalk and holster it again.

“Mercury, you did good,” Tal says.

“What the fuck was going on here, Tal? They were killing people to make custom human suits? What the fuck.”

“It’s pretty gruesome,” Tal says, ruffling his hair.

“Never seen anythin’ like it, and I came from the demon wastes.”

“Yeah, I don’t really want to look at it. It’s making me feel green.”

“You are green,” Mercury teases, pressing their shoulder into him.

“Fuck off, mousey.”

“Hey!… What now?” Mercury asks. “Am I pardoned? Good to go?”

“They’re not shooting you, are they? Not arresting you?”

“No,” Mercury says. They watch the guards nearby closely. “So, we getting out of here or what?”

“Sure. We can use some of the gold to rent an apartment nearby?” Tal asks.

“Sure…” I promised Davil I’d be back tonight… Ugh… I’m sure it will be fine.

“Follow, mousey.”

“I told you to stop calling me that!” Mercury says, their neck burning as they walk out of the storage complex back into the cold open rain.

     V

 Tal sits down across from Mercury in the high-up apartment, the rain pelting against the outer window. The warm flicker of the lanterns was welcoming. “Your skills are just as impressive as I remember!” he says.

“Thanks, Tal. You’re not so bad yourself. A little rusty, slow, but all round a good bull,” Mercury laughs. “So, come Tal, tell me about your life! How’s Kal holding up? Last I heard, she was trying to become a doctor.”

“She is a doctor!” Tal says with excitement. “She studied well, and now she’s working for a clinic in the lower city. Bad kinds down there, but she wants to help the poor and innocent.”

“Anything to help the poor and innocent,” Mercury says, taking a sip from their wine. “This tastes like shit, bring anything else?”

“What? Whisky?” Tal laughs. “Yeah, I got some. It’s special, though!”

“Oooh, really hyping it up now, are ya? Fuck me,” Mercury giggles.

“Haa-haa! I mean, if you insist!” he ruffles through his bag, pulling out an expensive bottle of whisky. “Mama told me that one day I would need to make peace with someone I had wronged, and she gave me this bottle. I think it was destined for you.”

Mercury looks at the label of the glass bottle. “You’re kidding. That’s sixty-year-old brew.”

“I’m sorry about our reunion. Didn’t contact you for almost six years, and I approach out of the blue for a job.”

“Ahhh, don’t worry about it. I probably would have gotten you into trouble. You might have gotten beat up,” Mercury lets out a chuckle. “Remember that one time you tipped over the cart, and I broke my fingers?”

“Yes! Of course! Mama would never let me forget that. ‘That young Mercury probably would have married you if it weren’t for you breaking their wedding ring finger!’ she’d say.” He places a glass before Mercury and pops the cork on the whisky. “Just to think! Sixty years brewing and another forty sitting in the cabinet, just to be drunk by us!” he pours Mercury a glass. “I see you lost that arm. Recent?”

“Three months, I think. You know you lose count quick…” Mercury gently picks up the glass. “To broken fingers and missed opportunities!”

“Ahh, to drinking one-hundred-year-old whisky!” he downs his in a flash.

Mercury slowly sips from theirs. “It’s good.”

“Ah! Right!?” he wipes his mouth with his arm.

Mercury drinks the whisky down to a fingernail deep before tipping it along the gun. “Time to clean you off.”

“Eyy! That’s exquisite whisky!” Tal says.

“Which is why it’s gonna clean off my gun.”

“Khorvaire, not letting you get any more whisk-”

Mercury snatches the bottle from their hand and begins gulping it down. They lower it slowly from their lips and lock eyes with Tal, their cheeks beginning to burn.

“Careful, Mousey. You’re getting dangerous,” Tal chuckles.

“Tal, would you wanna…” Mercury bites their lip, looking down in embarrassment.

Tal leans forward, placing his whisky on the table. “Like old times?” he chuckles.

Mercury places their hand on the table. “Yeah.”

      V

 Mercuy’s eyes shoot open, finding themselves alone in the room. They swat their left arm to the side, grabbing a note and a small pouch left on the bed.

“Good luck, sweet tief… I’m sorry.”  

Oh, for fucks sake. Mercury rolls out of bed, rapidly dressing as they hear the footsteps of many men walking through the hallways. They slam in six cartridges into the cylinder of their revolver, slapping it on the side to listen to it click. As they throw their coat on, a loud knock comes from the apartment door.

“Sharn Watch, open up!”

Fuuuuuuck. They point the pistol at the door. Five? Six? Not worth it… They move towards the window, looking outward to see a cargo ship taking off twenty feet below. Ah-ha-ah… Yeah, you’re doing this. Mercury runs to the apartment door and then runs full sprint at the window, shooting it four times before it breaks the magical barrier placed. Mercury leaps past the threshold of the window and begins falling, but not before a well-placed shot by a veteran guard finds its way into Mercury’s lower back.

To be continued…