#its so fucking chaotic and aesthetic

[empty-dream]

song-of-the-dead-SONG OF THE DEAD!!

[thesecrethistori-an]

No more coffee for you after 5 p.m., miss

[darkxwolf17]

crossing my fingers SO HARD for arctic versus tropic (rambling in tags)

[flowersforfrancis]

As soon as university’s over, I’m going to move to Chicago, and pretend it’s still the 20th century.

[pedgito]

𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐂𝐊𝐘 𝐒𝐖𝐄𝐄𝐓 | dbf!Joel Miller x reader

↝ other fics | requests? | ao3 | update blog | fic rec | ko-fi

summary | you're stranded, you need help—of course, Joel Miller is your savior.

content warning | listen. i wrote this in 3 hours, idk what to say. i had a thot and it went from there. its completely p w/o p, dbf!joel, age gap, moodboard is for aesthetic and reader is mostly not described aside from hair long enough to be put up, unhinged popsicle eating, eye-fucking, public-ish unprotected p in v car sex. listen i'm on my period rn don't look at me and thank you for my love, my twin, @chaotic-mystery for constantly supporting my gremlin behavior

word count — 3.2k

Out of all the people you had the chance of running into—of course it was Joel.

The chances were slim, but not impossible. You knew his work schedule well enough, similar to that of your fathers. He worked early mornings into the late evening, taking his commute home just as the sun was starting to set.

You gripped the gas can in one hand as you made your way down the side road, the other hand placed over your eyes like a visor to block the sun away. You didn’t even have a cell signal out here, so the walk seemed fruitless.

But, you had to find a gas station. 

You thought you could make it home, which was clearly poor judgment, and the hair falling from the haphazardly tied knot on top of your head was sticking to your neck, eyes squinting as the truck pulled up next to you.

“Now, darlin’—the hell are you doin’ out here in the middle of nowhere?” Joel asks, the blast of AC hitting you in the face as he rolls down the window, arm leaned over the console as he looked you over. 

It was clear you’ve been out here longer than you should and Joel doesn’t even take a second to hesitate before he’s popping the handle on the passenger door and inviting you inside the cooler cabin of his truck.

“Where are you comin’ from?” He asks, shifting the truck into drive before he rests his palm over the gear shift.

“A friend, I thought I had enough gas to make it home but,” You shrug, waving vaguely at your car parked on the side of the road as he drives by.

What took a fifteen minute walk to where Joel had picked you up was only a minute or so drive back. Joel looks at you wearily and turns up the AC, blasting the stray hairs away from your face but the immediate burst of cold feels like absolute heaven.

“Grab a water out of my cooler, sweetheart,” He gestures with a thumb over his shoulder and you scramble, leaning over the center console with your ass popped up in the air.

Joel assumed it had to have been a pool party, the skirt covering your bottom half doing nothing to hide the thin, strappy bikini bottoms you wore underneath. 

Joel doesn’t mean to stare, but he’s worried that you might hurt yourself, his hand reaching out to wrap around your calf in an effort to keep you steady.

A subtle smirk plays at the corner of your mouth as you reach for the water inside the cooler and pop your head back up, your ass grazing his hand on the way down as you twist back into your seat.

Little touches were never a big thing with you two, normal and constant and nothing unusual.

A hand on your shoulder at family cookouts, his hands engulfing yours as he popped open the cap on your beer, a squeeze of his hand at the back of your neck when he hugged you after a month or two of not seeing you around your father’s house due to college or work, whatever was keeping you so busy. He didn’t try to pry, but you’ve been around less and less with each passing summer—so this unsuspecting time with you, he didn’t mind. It was nice.

Really nice.

You twist at the cap and take a drink of the water, so thirsty that it starts to drip out of your mouth, a small droplet down your chin, reaching your chest and down the center of your breasts.

“It ain’t goin’ nowhere,” Joel jokes, squinting his eyes as he hides the growing grin on his face with his usual frown.

“Sorry, being out in that heat like that…” You take a breath, recalling the bottle and putting it in the drink holder, “I just feel so stupid for thinking I could make it.“

When the street lights come into view, you know you're closer to actual civilization. And, just as Joel takes a right on the next intersection you stop at, there it was.

“It happens,” Joel comforts, “but you were lucky I was drivin’ home—can’t even think about what could have happened if I didn’t pass by.”

Joel pulls into the gas station and turns off the ignition.

“Well,” You flash a bright smile, squeezing at his shoulder—he’s got on a dark shirt plastered with the logo of the construction company he worked for, faded and slightly damp from his own sweat, “you did and I’m thankful for it, Joel.”

“Hand it over,” Joel motions toward the gas can, “I’ll fill ‘er up for you.”

“Joel, you don’t have to—“

Joel tilts his head toward the gas can at your feet, eyebrows raised and hand held out expectantly.

“Just hand it over.”

You sigh softly and relent, reaching between your legs to grab the plastic jug, knowing of the eyes that drag down your spine from the open back of your top, tied just as your neck and the side of your breasts spilling out of your swim top.

Joel knows a snag, just a simple hook of his fingers would send them spilling out into the cool air, nipples perked up under the mesh fabric of your top and—

“Joel.”

Joel’s eyes pull up suddenly, his face flushed but he’s lucked out by the redness of hot, summer heat on his face.. He clears his throat and grabs the gas can.

“Be right back,” He tells you, “stay put, alright?”

“And where would I go?” You retort playful, “I’m sure you’d find me again anyways.”

Joel chuckles to himself with a shake of his head as he departs into the store, handing a ten to the clerk before he takes a quick glance back at you, fanning yourself with your hand and chugging down another swig of water.

“Actually,” Joel pauses for a moment, holding a finger up as he lingers down the aisle toward the freezer and grabs out two popsicles, hoping that would quell some of the heat, even if for a moment—plus, he knew you had quite the sweet tooth, “there, just put whatever’s left on the pump and I’ll use that to fill it up.”

The clerk nods and scans the items, handing Joel off the receipt and he’s half jogging back toward his truck—quick to toss you the keys and the two popsicle’s he’d bought.

“What is this?” You ask cheerfully, eyes lighting up as they plopped into your lap.

Joel kept the driver's side open as he filled up the gas can, watching as you peeled eagerly at the popsicle, the red dye immediately dripping down your fingers as you pulled away the plastic.

“Just throw it on the floorboard—I’ll clean it up later,” Joel notes as you look around, placing the lid back on the gas can before climbing back into the truck, “you mind openin’ mine?”

You place the cherry flavored popsicle between your lips with an eagerness that forces Joel to look away, the sound of you peeling away plastic in his ear as he pulls out of the gas station and makes his way back toward your car.

“Thank you, baby,” He says casually—not all that odd either, he’s got a million nicknames for you, some trickier to let slip around others but there was an unspoken agreement. You never minded, never cared.

He was only ever Joel to you and he didn’t mind that either. 

“Of course,” You smile, before dragging your tongue along the bottom of the popsicle and back up, sinking it back between your lips.

Joel just bites at it, not one to savor things very often.

You giggle and roll your eyes, the popsicle tip just as the edge of your lips before Joel is looking over at you curiously, ignoring the red stain of popsicle on your tongue as it peeks out.

“What?”

“Just—you’re not even trying to enjoy it, Joel.”

“It’s meant to be eaten, right?”

“It’s hot—it’s a cold treat, you’re supposed to make it last a little. Come on,” You hold the popsicle out for demonstration before licking up the side, sinking your lips back down in a show that was more for yourself, knowing how he constantly looked at you—if Joel chokes on the bite of flavored ice in his mouth you don’t see it.

It wasn’t a secret, how he looked at you. It’s been a few years since you left for college and teetering that line, nearing your mid-twenties now it seemed like it had only gotten more and more obvious. Joel’s never made his own advances aside from the one time your drunken state made you a little too confident, sliding between his legs at one of your family parties late at night, pressing a kiss right against his lips that ended far too quickly. 

He did kiss you back though, you do remember that.

“Alright, alright,” Joel waves his hand at you nonchalantly, “you can cut that out.”

You raise an eyebrow, feeling the sticky sweet juice slip down your fingers as the popsicle starts to melt, nearly finished as Joel had already downed his own.

“I’m just eating the popsicle,” You brush him off, “that you bought me—“

“You know what I’m talkin’ about, sweetheart.”

You do, but that half second of lingering pause makes Joel worry he has read the situation completely wrong.

“What? Do you not like it?” You tease him, “Doesn’t it turn you on, Joel?”

You finish up the last bit before tucking the stick into the plastic and back on the ground, suddenly realizing the red dye had stained the front of your top, causing a frown to form on your face as you rubbed at the material.

“Shit,” You curse, ignoring the heated look on Joel’s face at your words, practically oblivious with the sudden distraction. You pull at the tie on the back of your top and bunch up the fabric as you stuff it between your lap, meeting Joel’s half-dumbstruck look as he tries to keep his eyes on the road but also can’t draw his eyes away from you, “what—I got it all over my shirt?”

Joel pulls to the side of the road in an instant, forcing the truck into park, “What are you playin’ at?”

You look at him with confusion, narrowing your eyes.

“What? Why did you pull over?”

“What are the chances of me findin’ you out here? On this road?” He raises his eyebrows expectantly, “Hm?”

You feign innocence for a few seconds before you cave, smiling with a devilish glint, resting your chin in your hand as you lean against the center console, your bikini top doing nothing to cover the plump of your breasts as the press against the fabric.

“Well, I mean—I figured they were pretty likely but—“

“Is your car even out of gas?”

You chew at your bottom lip thoughtfully, eyes tilting upwards in thought—truth…lie. 

Joel seemed set on getting the truth. So, you give it to him.

“No, but I had you going, didn’t I?”

Joel is silent for too long and you raise your eyebrows in question before Joel reaches forward, tugging at the lever under his seat to send him scooting back.

“Come here,” It’s simple. An instruction. 

But the look on his face—the intimidation shakes you to your core.

“Now, don’t back off,” Joel challenges, “it’s what you wanted, right?”

“As if you don’t want it either,” You counter, “you’ve been eye-fucking me since I got in your truck.”

Joel doesn’t even deny it, only waits. A simple nod of his head in a gesture for you to climb over and into his lap.

So, you do.

His hands immediately find your thighs and push up the denim skirt, your own hands resting at your sides as you scoot until your cunt is pressed up against the hard line of his zipper, the denim of his jeans so sensitive against your bare skin, feeling like all your senses were dialed up.

“We do this,” Joel starts, “there’s no going back. So, I need you to think if you really want this or—“

You surge forward, forcing the back of his head into the headrest as you swallow his words in a sloppy, open-mouthed kiss, tongues clashing with the taste of sugary sweetness.

“Gotta be quick,” Joel tells you, his words lost on deaf ears as your hands drag down his front, inhaling the faint scent of his cologne, the ironic freshness despite having worked in the heat all day, “can I fuck you, baby? S’that too much to ask?”

You shake your head, peppering soft kisses against his lips, along his jaw, feeling his fingers reach for each tie at your hips and pull, his hand immediately sliding over your cunt, cupping you with the warmth of his palm.

“Get it out, baby—got my hands a little busy right now.”

The heat in his words makes your pussy clench, but your hands move even faster, dragging over the front of his jeans and pulling at the zipper swiftly and Joel lifts his hips enough to get them down his thighs but that was it, hissing at the instant your hand closes around his cock.

“You got a problem with me fuckin’ you like this?” Joel asks, a true gentleman, but you roll your eyes. “Don’t even know why I asked—you’ve been beggin’ for it.”

You tilt your head, smiling at him playfully before you lick at your fingers and taste the remaining sticky sugar before pressing them along the center of your cunt, mixed with the already growing slick—Joel nudges at your entrance as you watch, the tip of his cock notched against your hole and your pussy quivers with the anticipation as he drags his cock up, down, up, before sliding in all at once.

It’s slow, but intense. Your eyes close, brow drawing together as he pulls you further and further down his cock.

“Open,” He breathes out, “open your eyes and look at how you’re takin’ me, baby.”

You blink quickly, grabbing onto his bicep for purchase as you look down, his hands squeezing at the tops of your thighs as he admired, watching the way his cock has you on the edge of near tears—a mix of overwhelming emotion and intense sensation.

Joel pulls at your top gently and it falls without much struggle, he bunches the material up and tosses it aside with your bottoms, massaging the swell of your tits under his palms as you rock your hips slowly, hearing the soft grunt behind his closed lips as you lean into his touch.

Flicking his thumb over your nipples, he admires the way the nubs hardered, like he’d imagine earlier—he tries not to dwell on how you both got here, like it wasn’t years of built up tension finally crumbling underneath you both.

“Don’t be shy,” He tells you, “take whatever you need, baby.”

As does he, leaning forward to press his lips against your breast, tongue lapping over the pert nipple before he sucks it into his mouth, drawing a soft sigh out of you.

You lift your hips, in time with the hand of his own that drops to your side to quicken your pace, “Wanna take my time with you but we can’t,” Joel admits, “gotta get home.”

You nod, knowing he had his own responsibilities as a father—you don’t argue, placing your hands against the headrest and raising your hips nearly off of his cock before sinking back down quickly, keeping that pace for as long as your body will allow, shared breaths into each others mouth as he hands travel from your tits to your face, the largeness of his palms engulfing your face as he brings his lips to your mouth again, again, soft whispers of words you know he doesn’t mean. Promises you know are fleeting and easy to break. 

You couldn’t be with him, but you would take whatever this is.

“Just like that, baby,” He murmurs, grunting harshly into your ear as you tuck your head into his neck, his hand buried into the hair at the back of your head as you sink down onto his cock desperately, crying out into the side of his throat as he snaps his hips roughly, hitting so deep inside of you it makes you clench, biting down gently on his skin, “I feel it, I felt it.”

You snake your hand between your legs, finding your clit quickly and rubbing over the swollen nub, and Joel can tell by the neediness in your tone, moans broken into his skin as he fucks into you, haphazardly scanning the road for any passing cars—but he knew this place was always deserted, a shitty road that no one ever took.

Not even you, but today—it wasn’t a coincidence. 

“That��s right, baby,” Joel sighs, head thrown back as he groaned out, “gon’ let me use this pussy, yeah?”

You nod instinctively, willing to agree with whatever Joel asked.

“Wanna fill her up,” Joel admits, forcing you to lift your head and look at him, head tilted down slightly to meet your eyes, “that alright, darlin’?”

You nod again, but coherent this time. 

He loosens the reins completely by then, practically hauling you over his shoulder as he pounds into you, encourage the hand on your clit as he squeezes a handful of your ass under his palm, marking the skin with a few firm slaps that has you moaning out loudly into the sacred space of the truck.

“Joel, please—“ You gasp, “I’m gonna—right there,”

“I know, baby. I know.” He says softly, but the strain in his voice is obvious, groaning through clenched teeth as your orgasm crests, warmth spreading as you gush over his cock, the momentary bliss of sensation making your forget where you were, suddenly wishing that this had been a little less impulsive, wondering how Joel would treat you within the walls of his bedroom, buried in the sheets of his bed.

When Joel comes, it’s intense. His hands squeezing at your waist hard, his hips jerking out of rhythm as he stills you, coming inside of you with a deep groan, pulling you in for a frenzied kiss, laughing at how your faces uncoordinatedly press together, your nose smushed against his own and he kisses at the tip of your own as you pull away, his hair messier than when you started from your insistent grabbing and pulling during the heat of your orgasm.

He looked a complete mess, actually.

“You okay?” He asks after a long pause, his hand rubbing at your back, cock still buried inside you on the side of an empty road. 

“Mhm,” You nod drearily.

“Baby, you gotta drive home now.” He tells you and you know—it doesn’t make it any easier, though. “Don’t pull this shit again, alright?”

If he’d see it any other way you would have flinched, but it was soft and comforting—not a warning.

“You need somethin’, you come knockin’ on my door.”

And you know he means it.

“Okay, I will.”

“Swear,” That was an order, “I need to hear it.”

“I swear.” You reply quietly.

Joel doesn’t push you away, though.

If anything, he savors the few moments he has in this dreamy afterglow, a taste of what could be—but you both know never will. 

divider creds: @/cafekitsune

[simplydnp]

be honest with me. what are the chances of a hard launch in june

anon this question goes back years. and the thing is. we have been right once before.

you ask me this this time last year? fuck no. i might even quip that dapg would come back before dnp would hard launch. well. look at us now.

and even then, you look back on the content they started with in the revival--it honestly kind of felt exactly like where we left off, only a lot more explicitly queer (we stan). and then... trying to see without my glasses 2. and bang, spooky week happened. and that shifted the balance. we suddenly got slo-mo replays of handholds. day, after day, after day, finishing with the absolute masterpiece of halloween baking cinnamon rolls. in all honesty it was so much more than i'd've ever expected from them. truly another post-baking universe.

and it never really slowed down. suddenly we had cat prom photos, catboy butlers, catboy dan w/ phil photography credit, theyre 'wrestling' --running us full throttle into gamingmas, the first since 2017. and every day we had a new thing to freak out over: standing close. golf jokes. and then... pinof reacts. i don't know what compelled them to do it but i do have speculations. genuinely, i think they wanted to defang a lot of their history. we treated pinof 1, especially, with this... reverance. and it wasn't talked about too publicly--and dnp didnt do it either. so if they really wanted to move on, to bring down the walls, open the floodgates, define this new era: they had to throw the first stone. and they did. quite heartily too. suddenly this almost taboo part of their history--almost too intimate to be perceived--was on the table. and we were talking about it. joking about it. giving clear signals of 'we see it, it's okay.' and suddenly we existed in a post-pinof reacts world. of anything, i would've never predicted they would've done that. absolutely wild. follow that with it takes two being so chill and fond. incohearant being so blatant and heartfelt. trombone champ being unhinged and chaotic. the genuine and sweet complimenting of each other in the red carpet video. devan wedding... happilyphoreverafter... we crashed forward in time. never knowing what would be next. where is the line? how far will they go.

they teased us with japhan honeymoon and we knew 2024 would be wild. but we didn't know how much. from wdapteo 2023, to specific reminiscing about japan w/ devan, WAD happening, and phil playing a huge role in it all--from the orange carpet hosting, to 'ive been in *sex noises* with phil from the start!', to 'remote crisis manager phil lester', to dan saying he can stay during the thank you.

one of the biggest videos so far this year was the tiktok likes one. i will be forever haunted by the dog eating cheeseburger and willy wonka tiktoks--theres some things i was never meant to know. and yet. they tell us. explicitly.

every single video on amazingphil since the return of dapg has mentioned or featured dan. there's been a palpable shift in the way they interact. have you seen the way phil has been glowing in videos lately? this guy is on cloud nine all the time. it's really not hard to see why.

the energy of keep or yeet w/ dan... the absolute Lack of pretense of it all. phan twitter... watch your step baby girl...

dan and phil fucking crafts. talk about an unexpected return. legacy defining, one might even say. we're still in this tailspin of what everything means and they drop this insanely iconic video on us. from the storytelling to the production to the aesthetic--and its all capped off by explicit handholding. yes, it was part of the sacrifice. but hand in hand, the heart dan ripped from phils chest in one, and the knife that did it in the other... oh boy. we're really in it now. and then they put it on fucking merch. genius. truly no one does it like them.

and the foot has been on the accelerator since. dan and phil connections, shuffleboard & mocktails, getting deep slumber party, acknowledgement & approval of fics (yes previously given but never like this)--hell, even the sims today was wild for 'is their love language horrible banter 👀'.

you didn't ask for an essay but i gave you one. all of this to say, they've been moving the line. quite intentionally so. they intentionally revived their joint branding. they are 'dan and phil' again, and seem happier than ever about it, and i think that means something. they're saying things they never would have before--out of the closet or not.

as for june... 5 years since coming out is a big deal. so is this year being 15 years of dnp. hell, so is this year for being the first out pride month where they're explicitly a duo and regularly making content together. they're sentimental, there will be something.

my craziest idea is reacting to their coming out videos ��️😔 --but i don't think it'll actually happen. as for more realistic, i could see pride merch. and however that goes will be significant, in my opinion. i'm excited and curious.

i don't know if they'll hard launch. it's hard to put all of the implications, complications, and speculations back into the box once it's opened. dan's talked about it before--wanting to be able to fuck up and not be publically executed, instead, being able to learn and grow and work it out. i think that's a very understandable stance to have. very grounded. we'd have to ask him if tour/dapg has changed that now. i do think he's had some sort of life epiphany--whether it's about that specifically, only he can say. but i think it's there.

even if i portray a lot of level-headedness, i wear my clown nose with pride. sometimes the only option is to go with whatever is funniest at the time. they're both jokesters, so they could commit to a bit like that. but it's also like, it can be too serious for them to want to joke about. i don't know. i think we're in this almost beautiful state right now--the we know you know of it all. there's no expectations, no demands to be met, no obligations of types of content. they're happy. we're happy. it depends on if they feel ready. if they want to. we'll be here, always.

[ninelieswithme]

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚ *ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆ ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*

𝙰 𝚂𝚞𝚛𝚟𝚒𝚟𝚘𝚛’𝚜 𝙽𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝𝚖𝚊𝚛𝚎

ʏᴀɴᴅᴇʀᴇ sʟᴀsʜᴇʀ ʟᴇᴏɴ x ꜰᴇᴍ ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ

✩ ᴛᴡ = sᴍᴜᴛ, ɴsꜰᴡ, ᴘ ɪɴ ᴠ sᴇx, ʙʀᴇᴇᴅɪɴɢ, sᴡᴇᴀʀɪɴɢ, ɢᴏʀᴇ, ᴅᴇᴀᴛʜ

✩ sᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ - ʏᴏᴜ ᴀɴᴅ ʟᴇᴏɴ, ᴀ ɢᴜʏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴇᴛ ɪɴ ᴄʟᴀss ᴏɴᴇ ᴍᴏʀɴɪɴɢ ɪɴ ᴜɴɪ/ᴄᴏʟʟᴀɢᴇ, ᴊᴏɪɴᴇᴅ ʏᴏᴜʀ ꜰʀɪᴇɴᴅ ɢʀᴏᴜᴘ ꜰᴏʀ ᴛʜɪɴɢs ᴛᴏ ᴏɴʟʏ ɢᴏ ʜᴏʀʀɪʙʟʏ, ᴡᴇ’ʟʟ ɴᴏᴛ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀᴛ ʟᴇᴀsᴛ, ᴊᴜsᴛ sᴀʀᴀʜ

☆ ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ ɴᴏᴛᴇ - ʜᴀʏʏʏ sᴏʀʀʏ ɪꜰ ᴛʜɪs ɪsɴᴛ ɢᴏᴏᴅ, ᴍᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ᴍʏ ʟᴏɴɢ ᴛᴇʀᴍ ʙᴏʏꜰʀɪᴇɴᴅ ʙʀᴏᴋᴇ ᴜᴘ ᴛʜɪs ᴡᴇᴇᴋ.. ᴀʟsᴏ ɪ ʟᴏᴠᴇ ᴍɪᴅɴɪɢʜᴛ sɴᴀᴄᴋ’s.. ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴀ ᴍɪᴅɴɪɢʜᴛ sɴᴀᴄᴋ 😏.. 😭

⁂ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ᴅᴏᴇs ᴇ/ᴄ ᴍᴇᴀɴ? ᴇ/ᴄ ᴍᴇᴀɴ’s ᴇʏᴇ ᴄᴏʟᴏᴜʀ!

✪ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ᴅᴏᴇs s/ᴄ ᴍᴇᴀɴ? s/ᴄ ᴍᴇᴀɴ’s sᴋɪɴ ᴄᴏʟᴏᴜʀ!

★ sʟᴀsʜᴇʀ x sᴜʀᴠɪᴠᴏʀ ᴀᴜ - 3.8k ᴡᴏʀᴅs

𖤐 ᴋɪɴᴋ’s - ʙʀᴇᴇᴅɪɴɢ

ᴋɪɴᴋᴛᴏʙᴇʀ ᴅᴀʏ ᴏɴᴇ - ʟɪɴᴋ ꜰᴏʀ ᴋɪɴᴋᴛᴏʙᴇʀ ʟɪsᴛ - ʜᴇʀᴇ

༉‧₊˚🕯️🖤❀༉‧₊˚. ༉‧₊˚🕯️🖤❀༉‧₊˚. ༉‧₊˚🕯️🖤❀༉‧₊˚. ༉

Songs so him and her (you)..

The air hung thick with the scent of cheap beer and teenage drama.

You adjusted the borrowed dress you wore for the special day, its floral pattern clashing violently with the grunge aesthetic of Sarah's house.

The music pulsed a throbbing beat that echoed through the home, the tension building in your chest.

The lights ecstatic and frantic, eyes dilated from the alcohol in your system.

It was your 21st birthday today, a milestone you won’t forget.

But the anticipation had morphed into something darker, a fear-tinged dread.

It was all Sarah's fault.

Sarah, the self-proclaimed queen bee of the group you were in. Had been hostile to poor Leon from the start, thinking he was a freak that should’ve stayed in the gutter, where he belonged..

Leon, a timid soul.. well that’s what you thought.. you never knew what befriending him led you to- ahem..

Who never really fit in, with eyes as blue as the tropics. His hair a dusty gold.

You met him in the beginning of this year of college/university, his books flying out of his hands making the class banter and laugh.

Great..

Only keeping his head down, dropping to the group scrabbling for his books, till you walked over, helping grab some of the scattered books.

His blue eyes bearing into yours.

He didn’t stop staring, not for a second till he had to-

“..sigh, continue chapter 43!”

The professor yelled, instinctively you broke eye contact with Leon.. amazing giving him his books with a trademark smile.

Then standing to your full height, leaving to take your seat next to your friends.

Leon snarled to himself his hair hiding it, then standing, books in hand..

Stupid teacher..

With that he walked past the rows of people, their whispers and stares annoying him further..

Why are they staring.. what are you fucking looking at.. keep staring and I’ll SLIT YOUR FUCKING-

He only stared down enduring their judgement, sitting in the far corner, his piercing ice eyes staring into your e/c eye’s.

Then turning his head, eyes staring into the professor.

While your eyes stayed fixed onto the blondette.

In that moment you vouched to include him, seeing the pit of loneliness within his eye’s settling into the emptiness till you..

The class was soon dismissed, discarding your so called friends trotting over to Leon.

Without a thought you asked him to hang out with your group of friends with a crooked smile.

He did accept your proposal, with an unrelenting disgust for their loud, chaotic acts with the group.

You laughed gently taking hold of his sleeve his books long forgotten, he could feel his heart lurch into his throat.

Heat pooling his face with a light flush, while heat pooled between his legs.

God you were so cute..so pretty..so perfect…

God your just so perfect

As he throbbed lightly while you dragged him to your friends finally being pulled out of his sex filled daze.

“T-This is umm..” SHIT YOU FORGOT TO ASK FOR HIS N- “Leon”

He interrupted saving you from total embarrassment.

“Yea Leon, he should join our g-group”

Sarah just stared at the both of you before giving Leon a snide smirk.

“Fine.. like a give a shit”

That shocked Leon, only staring into her see her flinch lightly before turning her concentration onto the door.

She snorted walking away, the rest of the group following.

Fucking pig

Leon thought with a growl..

This was only the beginning.. of the end.

You quickly gashed after her Leon following at a lot slower pace, like he would run after some entitled bitch.

Sarah’s distain towards Leon only grew stronger, Sarah's snide remarks, the pointed glances, the exclusion from inside jokes.

Only made Leon annoyed, and you stressed..

He couldn’t have his poor baby stressed, so he tried his best finding every reason to stay home or away from your cunty friends and just you.

His perfect baby!

It wasn’t hard not attending much of the college/university, well when they found out he was head of his classes at least.

While gaining extra points for his lack of parents, plus his depression and schizophrenia medication.

It wasn’t a challenge not going but he hated the way you were treated.

The way Sarah trampled all over you, and you just took it!!

Baby no!! don’t be a fucking doormat!

Every whisper and thought was filled with shredding Sarah open with a smouldering hot blade, seeing the crimson cover him fully, the feeling of her body shaking to a halt, like cleansing his soul from gum under his shoe.

If the whispers and figures weren’t asking him to slash Sarah’s throat till her head lolled to the ground they were about you :)

About touching you, feeling you, cuddling you.. or sometimes.. shoving his drooling tip between your plush thighs, feeling his pre splatter and lube up your thighs while he dry fucked his cock around your thighs like a dog on heat.

While he told you about his day, about that he took his meds because you asked him so nicely while you were the only reason keeping him from slashing his bosses throat today <3

While he spoke about what you two were going to name your first born baby, or about how cute your body would look with his baby growing in your cute womb.

God his cock always grew firm every time he thought about you, just you!

Anyways!!

It escalated quickly..

Turning into deliberate attempts to humiliate Leon, to drive him away.

To deliberately turn him insane

BABY HES ALREADY THERE

Your loyalty unwavering as you defended him with all you had..

God he loved you..

He’ll give you a extra baby for that~ ;D

He couldn’t wait to grab that ugly head of Sarah’s and slit that throat till she gargled on her own filthy blood.

But the pressure was immense.

Sarah, with her sharp tongue and forceful charm, had turned the group of friends you were once so close with against you.

They started to echo Sarah's disdain like a whisper.

Your friends turned into enemies, their words laced with venom, their laughter cruel and mocking.

The birthday party within Sarah’s home once a celebration, had become a battleground.

"This is the last time, Y/N," Sarah hissed shoving you harder against the wall, her voice venomous.

Her hands on your shoulders as she snarled

All of her goons huddled in the cramped bathroom with the two of you.

You couldn’t help feeling like crying, tears beading in the corners of your eyes.

"You're either with us or against us. And if you choose that freak, it's going to be a lot worse than a few snide comments."

Sarah's words, fuelled by alcohol and malice, pierced straight through your sore heart.

Your lips quivered, head turning away, tears stinging your already glistened eyes, without a second thought you pushed past Sarah off of you and ran past the girls, out of the bathroom, some of them laughing as you retreated to the backyard patio.

Brushing past the hoards of people and loud music that blared in Sarah’s house.

Stumbling onto one of the outdoor pool couches, face hidden in some of the pillows muffling your cry’s.

The fire crisp near you while some adults stared down at you like a child speaking with their friends, alcohol in hand. 

Tears finally falling, you didn’t want to make a choice to choose Leon or your childhood friends.. why.. why WHY!?!

All while Leon watched from within the house.

His eyes cold..

Finally.

FUCKING FINALLY.

As you sniffled and cried into the beach pillows, the rays of stars on your skin.

While Leon stalked after Sarah and her goons, laughing about their victory.

More like crying over spilled milk..

He stepped closer to me instinctively Sarah snarled at Leon.

Finally Leon returned the favour sending off a more aggressive snarl.

Sarahs snarl faltered some of her goons breaking off from the growing confrontation..

Without a thought he turned back..

Later..I’ll kill this bitch later

He thought treading away, leaving Sarah shocked and confused.

The music dialling down from the fleeting people, leaving no trace except alcohol.

50 guests turned to 20 then 7..

To 3..

Finally when you had calmed down, music gone, Sarah’s house bare.

You stood up, your face puffed from tears.

Sighing heavily as your weakly treaded back into the home.

You made your choice..

Leon had to go..

Your heart ached, you’ve grown to care for Leon so deeply… but your friends were all you had, family wasn’t a thing.

More tears pricked at your face

Im so sorry Leon..

Turning your face forwards again stepping deeper into the euphoric aesthetics of the home.

Face sour through the smudged makeup.

When you had returned, makeup ruined, the music was still playing .. but there was a chilling silence in the air.

Sarah was gone, so were your ex friends.

You searched frantically for them, calling out their names, only to be greeted by empty silence.

e/c eyes scanning the home.

Chills ran down your spine, you felt like you were being watched

While in your frantic search your eyes dismiss the blood, the disorganised items, the quiet pleas for help.

Your shoes sliding on the ground, making you lose balance falling on your ass to look down.. seeing a body..

Someone’s body..

Sarah..

You stumbled upon the scene, terror dripping your face, as more tears ran down your face.

Blood covering your shoes, only gulping thickly on air.

Sarah laid unmoving blood spilling, eyes bulging like a deer in headlights.

Blood oozing her wounds, some un fallen tears beading in the corners of her glossy eyes.

Lips parted the gloss smudged, some blood collected in her mouth.

Her eyes as lifeless as her body, pain evident in her body, the blade still stuck in the centre of her chest, the wound agape, blood spilling out of it soaking her clothes.

“Y-Y/-…”

She said weakly finally shaking you from your daze.. scrambling to your feet kneeling down to Sarah..

“Y-Yes Sarah.. I-i-I’m gonna go get help-“ “N-No..” she interrupted

“But…” “it’s t-to lat..e” she said over your pea, blood spewing from her mouth, some blood being collected onto your hands while you held her head, tears streaming you face.

“I-I’m sorry Y-..N” she said weakly her body going limp her head kissing its grip, eyes dilating.

You stayed with her tears falling your face.. you knew Sarah was a total ass.. but she was one of your only friends you had.

She cared about you deeply.. though she had a very unique way of showing it..

Well that’s what you thought..

His poor baby, so manipulated by that.. that.. that witch.

With a bleeding heart you stood up from your lifeless friend’s corpse, tears welling in you red eyes, slowly making your way to the phone to call the police.

To do the right thing..

To only be stopped mid way something,.

No someone..

A broad chest slammed into you face, stumbling back, you say a string of apologies.

Eyes focused on the ground apologising for the blood seeping into his tank top.

“Baby dont apologise, red always did look good on me~”

You shivered.. L-Leon.

You eyes darted up seeing the dusty blonde.

His outfit seemed off.. different.. more

Frantic...

Why is there blood on his cheek..

Wait he wasn’t wearing that shirt.. O-Or that jacket

Why did he call me baby??

“Leon?”

He only hummed with a dorky smile.

Why would he smile at a time like this..

..

Whatever, maybe sarah was right, he can be a bit weird sometimes..especially that staring..

You shook your head, again walking past leon to call the police.

Then feeling a hand wrap around your wrist pulling you back.

The home phone just out of reach.

You turned to face Leon, still smiling like a love sick puppy.

“Leon, I need to call the police”

His face turned sour, eyes turned cold.

"No. You're not."

He growled, sending shivers down your spine immediately.. you knew

The smile..

The blood..

Then dismissing attitude to Sarah’s death..

He’s the killer.

“She deserved it.. you know that right dearest?”

The last part came out more sweet than sour, while he gave you pleading eyes.

You stepped back your breath hitching while you looked for a way out of this mess.

“Y-You kil-“

“Yes I did..”

He interrupted smiling as if he didn’t do such a thing..

He just killed someone for you.. How sweet

But now you wanted to go and snitch on him?

For what?? Saying a small sorry

Please

He didn't plan on you ever siding with that.. that thing.. so he'd need to convince other wise.

Tears beaded your eyes.. you got played, you let a sociopath into the group and got Sarah killed..

Your heart was torn to shreds.

You should call the police,

Get Leon arrested.. but Leon’s all you have..

Your friends are gone, family isn’t an option..

God why..

“Leon why..”

You said your voice breaking tears falling for your face.

“Why do you think silly”

He cooed as if your friends blood was on his dirty hands, as he leaned into you boxing you in, with a coy smile.

You flinched while Leon brushed hair out of you face.

Then leaning into you, then speaking into the shell of your ear.

"I'm sick and tired of them treating you badly. You're far too sweet and stupid to know how to deal with it, so I did for you baby!”

He smiled like a child on Christmas.

He really didn’t know what he did was wrong

Did he..

Your pain turned fury, yelling at him.

“So you fucking killed someone”

Leon didn’t like that..

His cold demeanour returning, his face hardening.

His hand around your wrist crushing down enough to bruise.

You yelped, more tears dropping your face.

“Leon that hurt really”

He only stayed stoned face then faking a smile.

“Whattt, just treating you like my heart right now baby, stop crushing it”

He spat, his hold still painful.

Your eyes glassy while looking around the home, looking for a way out.

“No need baby~ it’s just you and me”

Still looking for a way out, staring around, the music still playing giving you a worse migraine.

“Eyes on me”

He hissed letting go of your clearly swollen wrist grabbing your chin roughly, your e/c eyes meeting the cold icy ones of Leon

Earning Leon another yelp.

Looks like you’re finding your place slowly but surely.

You looked at him flinching at his breaths, legs buckling back and forth barely keeping you up right

“What scared, of me.. huh scared of the man of your dreams, for saving you”

He laughed at the last part finding it very annoyingly funny that you’re cowering to your- well what he thought your saviour.

“Y-you didn’t save me, you played me?!”

You yelled back..

Awww when he thought you were learning you just had to run that dirty mouth of yours..

Without a thought his hold on your chin turned hostile, turning to a hold on your throat.

Eyes bulging, hand clawing at his much bigger one.

While you gasped and heaved for air some tears dropping from your ruined face

“I think your deserve a good lesson on respect baby.. then being a entitled bitch~”

He cooed coldly forcing a happy facade while all he wanted to do was spank that ungrateful ass of yours.

Here you were, pinned to Sarah’s bed, caged in by Leon, with no way out~

Moans escaping your lips, Leon’s lips ravaging your body.

The heat between your legs pooling. Feeling yourself clench around nothing.

Kissing up your neck smearing the blood on his check onto your collarbone. Where many other red spots laid form Leon’s so called love.

Quickly he pulled up and off your floral dress, then your bra, leaving you bare.

The cold air hitting your areolas

Eyes going large, you cover yourself with your hands.

Hiding your puckered nipples.

Only to feel a lot more callous pair of hands rip them away.

You breasts bare.

“Baby don’t hide from me~ I love you”

He said with a genuine smile, gently looking at your pretty breasts..

How’d I get so lucky.

Such perfect, hair, face, smile, body, attitude.. skin,

Oh so perfect

“So perfect”

His lips making contact with your smooth skin, the dampness of your panties beading..

“L-Leon~”

You said in gasped breaths, the feverish blush growing.

You hand snaking down while Leon sucked and nipped at your skin

Your hand coming to a halt..

Feeling Leon’s hard on through his jeans, grind against your hand, making him whine every so often.

Feeling it twitch for the lack of stimulation.

Your hand making smooth motions while Leon licked at you all over, leaving marks at his wake.

Earning you whimpers from the blondette while he spoke.

“M’been wishing this for so long”

He groaned then halting..

“Oh!”

“Where’s my manners, you need a punishment still!”

He smiled happily, your blood running cold while Leon flipped you onto your stomach.

Leon’s gaze following down your stunning body his eyes making contact with your pink pants, the word slut embodied onto them.

“Fuckkk.. you slut~”

He hissed pushing his clothed cock between you ass grinding and humping against your plush ass for a few minutes.

Only stopping himself when he felt like his cock wanting more.

Landing a hard hit onto your ass, with another coming after the other.

Making your eyes bead with tears, though the knot in your stomach grew.

So did the dampness of your panties grew, mind growing more foggy.

Feeling Leon strike your pretty ass over and over again, the dampness grew.

You’re hazy growing by the minute, nipples puckering.

While so did Leon’s occasional grinding.

“Are you sorry baby?”

He asked spanking your ass again, tears threatening to fall.

“Baby?~”

He snarled slapping your ass harder leaving an imprint..

You yelped the heat of the slap coursing through you, landing at your clit.

“Y-Yes Leon”

You said tears finally falling, the feeling of hot air on your red ass sending shivers.

He smirked slapping your jelly ass again.

What does this man want from me?!?

You thought eyes lidded and aching.

“It’s daddy”

He said planting a kiss onto your temple, then coldly slapping you again, tears coming down while he peppered the side of you face in tender kisses.

“Sayyy it~~”

He hissed, hand raised to spank your reddened rear again.

“Y-Yes daddy”

You choked out, tears clouding your vision.

“What are you sorry for??”

He asked coldly though keeping his hand raised, a smirk tugging at the corners of his mouth.

“M-M sorry for not being grateful”

You sobbed, Leon’s demeanour changed

Turning more..

Tender.

“Good girl, I forgive you”

He said flipping you back on your back.

“Lemme say sorry”

He kissed you, his tongue dancing with yours, a large hand cupping your heat.

Fingers playing with the thin fabric.

Making you moan, back arching lightly.

“L-Leon~”

He chuckled stopping his motions on your damp pussy.

“Uh uh uh~ daddy~”

You whine in the loss, bucking your hips into his digets.

“Naughty girl.. m’but I can’t stay mad at you~~”

He said pushing them into your plush folds, deviding them through the fabric.

Nipples hardening, grinding your wet heat against his fingers. 

The wetness collecting lightly on Leon’s fingers.

Without much to waste Leon grabbed the damp spot on your underwear, slipping them off of your silky s/c skin.

Goose bumps littering you thighs and arms while you gasped out on Leon’s boldness.

Feverish blush covering your face.

The dusty blonde tampered with his belt unbuckling it, throwing it to the side while pulling down his pants.

Cock springing out of its thin confines, the tip glistened with clear pre.

He was a light hot pink, with a cute swollen tip, with little to no hair down at his v line to the base of his twitching cock.

He moaned while you stared at his man hood, pre oozing at the tip.

Bitting his lower lip.

God baby keep staring at me like that, m’gonna cum..

He thought shuffling closer to you, kissing your neck passionately, nipping at you.

Pulling his fingers from your folds.

Hands collecting at your knees spreading your glistening folds.

Legs pushing past your calf’s.

With a smooth motion Leon sunk his cock deep into your tight walls.

Hooking it deep inside your tight pussy, his cock bulging out of your womb.

M’gonna breed this greed thing

He set a fast pace, hand locked on your thigh. squeezing every so often.

His cock hitting your gummy walls where you’ve craved for so long.

Tears beaded your eyes, while Leon bit at your neck, growling.

“Nobody’s been in this deep I see~”

He said looking at your flush and hazed state.

You nodded slowly, eyes lidded. Sweat covering your form.

God baby m’gonna fuck you full of my seed, m’gonna make you a momma if ya keep that up.

“Huh biggest you had”

He said ego boosting when you nodded again.

God your clit was throbbing, aching to be touched.

Whining you added a diget onto your puffy bud, Leon thrusting deep inside your cunt.

Your moans music to his ears.

“M’shoulda killed that bitch a loonng time ago”

You clenched around his cock, the remembrance of Sarah stinging.

“M’too early?~”

He sensed your unease fucking you faster, tears pricking your face from how good Leon’s cock felt.

Plus the dread you having Sarah’s killers cock inside your heat at the moment.

Awww baby still sad, over that bitch.. I’ll make you feel better.

He smirked then kissing you senselessly

“Forget about her..”

“Think about our babies more~”

He said speeding up, taking more of the reigns, pushing your finger away from your clit earning a whine.

Shoving his thumb on it, making you squirm and buck into leon.

Earning a smirk..

Atta girl

“M’gonna fill you~”

Said hips bucking, cock twitching.

Tongue lolled out, eyes lidded.

I’ll do alll the work~ baby

He pushed you further on his cock, the sound of skin slapping echoing the bedroom.

His cock sliding in and out of your tight walls.

You Meeks being heard.

“Gonna fuck this pussy so good, m’gonna keep you here, b-breed you ah~ right here”

He spat, his thrusts growing uneven the knot in your tummy growing.

Your hands going weak for Leon to drag them into his hair, you pulled on his hair earning a growl.

“M’Gonna give you everything”

“All of it!”

He whimpered cock sporting pre deep into your greedy cunt.

Feeling the hot sensation of Leon’s cock drag in and out of your needy hole.

Your body trembling, legs shaking, hands unmoving, eyes lidded.

He smirked seeing you whine on his gritty cock.

The sensations of your pussy wrapped around him sending shivers down Leon’s toned body.

His cock throbbing, hair sticking to his forehead.

“I-I did this for you.. only you”

He whined gasping, his hold on your knees becoming harder, while your hands in his hair tugging on him.

“G-Gonna cum..”

You whispered, your cunt squeezing Leon every so often.

You better not me on birth control

“Me too baby.. let’s come together”

He said like a puppy on heat bitting his lip, your juices mixing at his base.

“Breed you so full of my love”

He panted happily, you could almost see the hearted pupils in his ocean blue eyes.

Your knot growing unimaginably large, your clit swollen and red.

Leon’s finger firm on it, making your squirm around his cock.

Cock speeding up, pounding your pussy.

“So c-cute, s-so swollen with my b-babies, shit- go-nna c-cu-um”

Leon’s hips stuttering, white ropes filling your slick cunt, a whimper escaping him.

Your womb inflating, cum shooting deep into you, the warmth adding to your twitching clit.

Head lolled back, Leon frantically kissing you, still thrusting, while tears fell, from your eyes, mouth a gape.

“Did so well, taking my seed”

He cooed kissing and licking at your sweaty skin.

“Such a good job baby~”

He smiled kissing at your face pulling hair out of the way of your sticky fire head.

Exhaustion getting the better of you, from the betrayal to the heart ache to well the pussy ache~

Your eyes fluttering closed, while Leon caressed your face, littering it with kisses.

A growl coming from him.

Accompanied with a the gaping feeling of his cock entering you again

Looks like round two

[cat-mermaid]

i do a ton of sashiko sewing. Thing is that my aesthetic is very colorful and chaotic so instead of those lovely clean patterns you see online, what I do looks like what a clown would make in the mad max apocalypse: LOTS of different colored threads and fabrics all fused together. My stiches are not even, they are random and upsetting. I know this because I have taken a few sashiko classes and have seen the light go out of the teacher's eyes everytime I showed them my shit

I also have a bad habit of grabbing stuff I want to alter that looks cool but is actually too small, so I hack it apart and Frankenstein it back together in a very deliberately fucked up way to fit me

This stuff feels great and the sashiko stitching makes its feel 1000 times more durable than anything you'd find at stores. Tissue paper jeans I bought 10 years ago at forever 21 now feel like somthing made for sailors to wear while looking like clown desert punk

I'm still not confident about certain things, such as fixing crotch blow out. I took my favorite pair of altered jeans to this tailor recently and told her I just wanted these two rips on the crotch patched. She barely glanced at the neon green jeans and said oh that won't look good and I was like ma'm have you seen the rest of the jeans?

She then actually laid them out and saw my lisa-Frank-enstein jeans and i saw the light go out of her eyes as we stood there in silence

i know i'm doing somthing right ;)

[penny-anna]

i put off watching the Swedish arena tour Jesus Christ Superstar bcos i wasn't sure abt watching an entire musical in a language i don't speak but it turns out i shouldn't have worried, i know the score well enough that following the action was a non-issue and the staging was worth it. it's here on Youtube free & legit. (in case it doesn't follow act 2 is here.)

couple of general thoughts on it:

i described it to my sister as having a goth rock aesthetic and then sent her a picture and she said they look like Abba. gothic Abba Jesus i guess gldjhgfjk

its got a very. happy Jesus? someone in the comments described him as a chaotic bisexual. a little jarring to me as i'm used to the 2000 version but then it registered with me like how hard he was gonna fall come act two and it was like. fucking ouch.

charmed & delighted by this Judas. what a sweetheart goth baby. never done anything wrong in his life. mesh shirt. 0 complaints here.

brutal climax. like this probably goes without saying but its an especially bloody one imo so watch out.

anyway yeah the shippers were right this one well worth it. had a blast.

[winterarmyy]

Until Then

A series of random Bucky Drabbles that I can't let go but don't have the brain to make the whole complete plot of.

Summary: A mission back in time brought Y/N to an unexpected encounter with the man she fell in love with.

Words: 2.3k++

Pairing: 40s!bucky / avenger!bucky x female!reader

Warnings: melancholy-ish plot line with fluffy ending

Inspiration: "You still would've turn my head, even if we'd met on a crowded street in 1944 and you were heading off to fight in the war" – Timeless (From the Vault) by Taylor Swift

Read my other works here: Masterlist

It was supposed to be a quick in and out mission. Y/N and Tony were sent back in time to 1944; one day before Captain America and the Howling Commandos deployed to their next mission at the Austrian Alps, in Europe.

The duo were supposed to retrieve some lost files regarding Hydra's hidden bunks and labs back in the days. After the fight with Thanos, there were rumours of the re-creation of Project Winter Soldier lead by an organization that once associated with Hydra. So, they need all the information they could get their hands on; including the ones that are lost decades ago.

Unfortunately for them SHIELD used to be shitty at storing physical files back in the days. To be fair they still do, especially now that technology had advanced. Every single information were at the tip of their fingers; from typical criminal records to the name of every single doctor and nurses who were present when the person was born.

They literally have everything. And nothing at the same time.

And honestly, the mission was quick as they predicted. Tony managed to scanned the needed files and some others that he thought would be important. He's extra like that too, which was a plus.

However quick the mission supposed to be, they barely make it though, especially when the guards were suspicious of Tony's apparently "hippie" beard. It was such a shame. So much for dressing up in 40's style. They kind of nailed the outfit and aesthetics, according to Steve anyway.

However, thankfully by the time they got out of the facility they managed fit right in with crowd. The wave of people lead the duo along its current, more and more people joined in to the point that they weren't able to find any quiet place to activate their time device.

"I thought we're still in WWII? Why is there fucking a parade in the middle of the day?" Tony being unapologetically sarcastic as always.

Y/N looked around as she observed, there was couple of people animatedly, albeit, excitedly exclaimed to the streak of success of Captain America and the Howling Commandos in the war.

A little to the right of them, were a group of children who were semi-cosplaying as Captain America and his dream team, passionately play-fighting with the enemies as if they were in a theater performance.

"I guess they're celebrating small wins. Steve and his team did have several successful raids since the battle at Azzano." It was in fact true; what Y/N speculated was exactly the very reason of the current occasion.

Tony simply shrugged as he stretched his neck higher to hopefully find the end the crowd, "Sure, just keep your eyes open for a place to time jump. I don't want to be stuck in the middle of another war." Y/N nodded as she looked around the sides, wondering if there's an empty alleyway that they could use.

The more sketchy looking it was, the better.

The crowd was chaotic with different mix of conversations and cheers; voices intertwining with one another, each sentences criss and crosses into indecipherable storyline. But even then, Y/N could recognized that breathy, slightly giggly laughter anywhere.

Especially when he brushed right by her.

Y/N was well aware of how madly in love she was with Bucky even with the coy cat-and-mouse game they were playing for months. She knew exactly the hold he had on her soul that at some point, she was conviced that he still would've turn her head in any lifetime.

But that idea was only supposed to be one of the secrets in her mind; the thoughts of a hopeless romantic that she was. Certainly, she didn't dreamt of the vision for it come true. But there she was, frozen on her spot when the time stood still on the crowded street in 1944; fortuitously crossing path with man she fell in love with.

There weren't any suitable explanation for this other than it was fate. In that short milliseconds, Y/N saw the resemblance of the sight to a memory of hers in the crowded room a few short years ago; his left arm slung around Steve's neck, letting his weight leaned on his super soldier friend as he let out a hearty laughter.

There were only slight difference from what she saw before and what she currently seeing; Bucky wore an all black suit at that party, now he's wearing his military uniform in a parade. Bucky was dead drunk on Asguardian mead that night, now he's as sober as a soldier deprived of liquor. Bucky's left hand was adorned with high-tech vibranium metal, now that very hand was still made of flesh and blood, still alive.

During that brief moment of revelation, she truly believed that they were supposed to find this.

Whatever this is supposed to be; Fate? Love? Both? She was not sure either.

She was so stuck on holding her gaze on his back as the young soldier walked a few steps away from her that she didn't notice how the people in the surge glared at her unmoving state or how she had been astray from Tony.

Well, at least it only lasted until someone bumped into her and she staggered backwards, inevitably fell on the ground.

Y/N groaned but quickly patted her pockets to find her time device was still there. I mean, she can never be sure if it was just an accident that she fell or someone intended to distract her while pick-pocketing her belongings.

Though other people would probably already stood on  their feet but Y/N was still on the dusty road, as she was busy recollecting her mental state rather than her physical.

That was when a calloused hand reached out to her, offering a kind help.

She didn't think twice to take his hand, let alone looking up at his face when she gripped it tight enough to make a solid foundation to push herself against the gravity, "Oh dear me! Thank you so much, sir. I really..." She lost her momentum when she met the pale blue of his eyes, "...appreciate it." She ended the sentence breathlessly.

It's Bucky. Her brain tried to let her process the thought. It was not her Bucky but still... it's Bucky. Her eyes then fell to where their skin touched. Warm and gentle. His left hand felt the exact same as his right. It made her to cave in the urge to hold it a little longer, to savour the memory of what it could've been; not that she weren't fond of his vibranium arm but curiosity can be such a fickle thing.

Bucky smiled, "Glad to help, my lady." And oh dear does he smiled effortlessly, freely; as if he knew he deserved to feel joy in his life.

Even if she didn't want to, she had to let go of his hand after a few seconds too long of holding it when she was already up and ready to go. She returned his smile though her heart was barely tough enough to stop the spreading of its cracks, "Really, I can't thank you enough."

In reality, it was probably unnecessary to thank him that much for helping her to get back on her feet, but Y/N wasn't really thanking him just for that.

Unbeknownst to him, she was thanking him for not holding back a smile, for not overthinking about the things he might have done to draw a conclusion that he was undeserving have the luxury to smile, for unapologetically just living the life he supposed to have.

She thanked him for it.

Bucky chuckled amusingly as he slightly titled his head to the side. A charming pull on the corner of his lips revealed a smile that could swoon anyone on sight, especially her.

"Well, we're having a little party tonight before deploying to Europe tomorrow. So, maybe you can thank me by letting me bring you to the dance? How about that, doll?" She almost forgot that Steve was there next to him, until Bucky references the word "we".

And especially when his words might just pulled Y/N's heartstrings in ways that she could never thought someone could do. It was awfully slow, almost too delicate of a pull, but each inches of it pained her deeply.

If it was up to her, she would've said yes a million times over but she knew she can't. And the voice in her earpiece reminded her of it, "Y/N, we gotta go." Tony urged as he watched her from the corner of the street.

Y/N tried her best not let her facial expression flatter, "Unfortunately, I can't. I'm going back to my hometown today." It wasn't exactly a lie when she made that excuse.

"Ohh, I see. You're not from here, huh?" Bucky was very honest as his reaction clearly showed his disappointment. Though not at her, just at the situation.

Her brows briefly crunch into an apologizing plead before she boldly grabbed him by the collar of his uniform, slightly pulled him down to her level, while the other hand cupped one side of his face.

She tiptoed herself upwards as she pressed a firm yet sweet kiss on the smooth skin of his cheek and whispered against it, "But, I hope this would do."

Lost for words, heck, Bucky was lost for thoughts. What was left was his own heart thumping hard and loud that he bet Steve can hear it from where he was standing. His cheeks became warmer by the second and the redness spreads even to the tip of his ears.

Of course he had his cheek kissed before, but not like this. None of them felt like this. They were always too fast, too hasty.

Hers was different. It lingered a little longer, gently leaving her imprint on him. He can feel her grip on his collar, the stroke of her thumb on his cheek and of course the soft pressure of her lips on the other side of his face. He could everything so particularly.

Bucky was rendered speechless even after she pulled her lips away; it was too soon for his comfort. Eyes wide open, his lips slightly parted as he let himself lost in the pleasant surprise.

He thought she would parted herself and ran away feeling embarrassed, but she did the very opposite. Y/N lead his forehead to lean on hers, tip of their nose grazed, and her lips hovered above his.

So close, yet refused to merge with one another.

Y/N whispered quietly, as if she was talking to herself, "You'll be fine, James. You'll find home in the future. I promise."

Her voice trembled as Bucky just noticed how wet her eyes were becoming. With that amount of tears in them, he wondered if her sight were all blurry now.

Y/N took in a shaky breath before continuing, "You just need to survive the winter and trust me at the end of that season, you'll reach the sun again." Her thumbs softly traces his cheeks as she spoke.

Bucky didn't quite understand what she was saying but if he loosely translate it, it would mean that 'she believed that he'll be back soon after the war'. But then again, he felt like there were some major things that was missing from the context that he came up with.

Y/N's earpiece send another transmission of Tony's voice, "Okay, seriously. Come on, Juliette. Your other Romeo is waiting for you." She couldn't help but to smile as she closed her eyes, letting the excess tears fall down to her cheeks.

She didn't want to say goodbye, as she knew that this was not where their story ends, at least not his; that's for sure. So, she simply smiled up at him with a reassuring look in her eyes before stepping back. She then, briefly turned her attention to the dumbfounded Steve, gracing him with a similar smile before walking away.

It was just a few steps away when her hand was caught in between someone's, "Hey!" Y/N looked over her shoulder to see Bucky; wide eye, blinking in disbelief and blushing red, all at the same time, "WiIl... Will I see you again?" He asked, though hesitant; wondering if he was being rude.

Compared to what she had done to him, he was just being too polite.

Y/N chuckled dearly, "Of course." Then she replied confidently, "I owe you a dance after all." Her lips parted into a cheeky grin.

Bucky let out a sharp relieved sigh as his lips mimic hers, "I'll look forward to it, doll." He slightly bowed as his hand pulled hers closer to his lips, "Until then." He placed a soft kiss on the back of her hand as his gaze remained on hers.

Apparently, it was Y/N's turn to blush to his antics. She stepped back shyly as her cheeks brightens before scurring away. Maybe, Bucky was right with his prediction prior. She did ran away feeling embarrassed after all.

She jogged towards the next corner of the street, meeting up with Tony. The older might have eyeing her in a teasing manner, but his smirk was the biggest giveaway. Y/N simply rolled her eyes, even if her lips maintained its shape from the aftermath of her encounter with Bucky.

As they entered deeper into the alleyway, Tony spoke, "I gotta admit, young terminator was a hottie. Not hotter than me, of course." he claimed.

Y/N frowned, letting out a scoff, "What do you mean "was"? He still is." Call it bias, but at least she was telling the truth.

Tony shrugged, "Meh. Would argue to differ. But, whatever that floats your boat, I guess?" Tony sassed as they clicked on the time device at the same time, revealing a swirlling portal, in front of them.

Y/N quirked her brow, her hands on her hips, "You're just jealous that he aged like a fine fucking wine and you don't." She purposely challenged his ego.

Tony dramatically rolled his eyes, "Please. He wishes." He walked into portal with an attitude, making Y/N laughed at his childish acts.

She looked back at the alleyway one last time and reminisce the last moments of a past that she never belong in. As she walked into the portal, she thought that maybe, it's time to pay her debt to Bucky.

End.

Read my other works here: Masterlist

A/N: The start of bucky drabbles because why not. This is considered a drabble for me because i feel like there's lack of story building. But, you tell me. And did you enjoy it?

[silviakundera]

with the conclusion of Snowfall...

why do i enjoy Republican Era chinese dramas so much?

aesthetics! there is this blend of 1920-30s western fashion influences and traditional chinese garb & architecture that just pleases my eyes.

everyone looks very depressed & dangerous & sexy

chaotic period of transition - no matter if you're in the 1910's, 20's, 30's some absolutely wild historical shit was going down

cars and guns and gloves and swords. rotary phones!

dancing & drinking in night clubs, in glamorous pockets amid the violence & instability outside; a lil touch of mask of the red death vibes

end of empire themes, as a country tries to find its way after the end of the last imperial dynasty

there's those gangster, mob boss vibes from american and british dramas set in the 1920s, except everything is cranked up x100 because of general lawlessness; central government and law & order was a paper thin veneer over warlords

the start of WW2 from an entirely different perspective than the common narratives that I was exposed to growing up in the US (which is 99% stories about the european stage)

sino-japanese war / war of resistance material like Hidden Blade is fucking badass ok 🤷

in a time of resistance to occupation, colonizers encroaching, warlords fighting over cities, brewing civil war.... there are many different options of protagonists and unlikely "heroes" who are picking their battles and discovering what they are willing to fight for

Beautiful 👏 women 👏 in heels 👏and 👏 slinky 👏dresses 👏

Lots of revenge narratives. I love an over-the-top, bloodthirsty & destructive revenge narrative

Depending on the genre, there might be little or heavy politcal /patriotic discourse. But tbh none of the rah rah patriotism stuff distracts me much, because all the american and british produced stuff set around WW2 has rah rah patriotism & propaganda in it, so I just consider that part of the essential genre vibes. It's just another country's version. (Of course, others will have less patience when it becomes heavy-handed. YMMV.)

Dark & Gritty

Hidden Blade (film) - a masterpiece, if you enjoy dark WW2 spy films that play with narrative style and challenge the viewer to follow the story as it's woven. Had to review detailed historical context for the years in question, to be ready to consume. But worth it. I've watched it 3 times. 💀

Heroes (2024) - the very beginning era of this genre/the transition into repulican period. rocks fall, everyone dies. Primarily a tragic wuxia & pre-republican fusion. Excellent enough that I didn't mind the bleak storyline. 💀

Detective-ing

Miss S - adaption of 1920s Australian mystery procedural Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries, staring Vengo! ML actor of Snowfall

Checkmate - Agatha Christie stories adapted to the setting & time period, plus bromance. I watched half the episodes w my brother, as we are both huge agatha christie fans. It was fun if you can be chill about adaption changes.

My Roommate is A Detective - for mystery & bromance lovers. Same actor duo as Checkmate.

Detective L - don't know much about this one tbh

Romance arc, with a somewhat happy ending for the 2 leads

Provoke - Gorgeous, glamorous, vibes vibes vibes all day long. Revenge and romance. ❤

Fall in Love - sons & daughters of warlords and their supporters get sexy and dangerous and decide even joining the civil war is better than the prior generation's bullshit. This is an objectively bad drama that I really enjoyed anyway (it helps that I skipped every scene for the 2nd and 3rd couples). This one turns v propaganda heavy at the end, if that bothers you. ❤

Arsenal Military Academy - military training hijinks w a side of cross dressing romance. Xu Kai and Bai Lu! It's soliders and japanese invasion et al, so be prepared for the standard patriotism. Comedy & drama. HE for the FL/ML but expect character death in this subject matter. ❤

Rookie Agent Rogue - Late 1930s spy drama with small romance side-plot. Expect the standard wartime patriotism, like with Arsenal Military Academy. The draw is the lead actress, the FL from Princess Agents, Minglan, Legend of Shen Li. HE for the FL/ML but expect character death in this subject matter. ❤

City of Streamer - Older woman seduces younger man who is the son of her revenge target. Melodrama with people serving looks. ❤

War of Faith* - Young man just wants to join the banking industry and have a subtextually gay relationship with his mentor in peace, but there's a civil war going on. Protagonist would like to be excluded from this political narrative, but ultimately is forced to pick a side. ❤🌈 *(Is it censored gay romance? No, not based on a gay novel. So not officially! But some viewers felt there was a subtextual romance storyline #shenlai ; YMMV. The happy ending is Untamed-esque; implied only)

many, many pulpy mini-dramas about revenge! warlords! ladies with pistols! (Miss Mystery, First Marriage, Maid's Revenge, etc)

Also... (happy ending not guaranteed)

Siege in Fog

Love in Flames of War

Couple of Mirrors - censored F/F 🌈

Stand by Me - censored m/m 🌈

Killer and Healer - censored m/m 🌈

Winter Begonia - censored m/m 🌈

[bettsfic]

This may be a strange question, but as someone who has never gotten the hang of using notebooks in my day to day life (unless it's once in a while to outline something specific like a project for work), what are the kinds of things you write down in them?

for journaling, that's complicated. youtube always recommends me these "journaling will improve your life!" videos and i think they're very funny because i've kept a journal for 20 years and it has made me a worse and more miserable person. so i will not be writing any "how to journal" posts any time soon.

my commonplace notebook, however, is where i keep everything. every morning i write down the date, the hours i slept, and my weight. occasionally i track my mood and mental state, because when i meet with my psychiatrist i like to have cold hard data to give her. then beneath that, i write out my to do list for the day.

it's kind of a reverse bullet journal in that you fill it up with all the random ephemera of your life and then label the important bits with a highlighter and index it later.

more specifically i keep:

the books/movies/shows/etc that are recommended to me.

notes i take at the doctor's office, or when i do my taxes, or get my oil changed. i'm a compulsive note-taker. in fact i started a commonplace notebook because it calms me to have something to write on and with even in situations where that's weird. i'd rather look weird than be anxious.

ideas for fanfic, original work, newsletters, craft thoughts, workshop models, etc.

brainstorming/planning/prewriting stories.

tracking my WIP cleanout and annual goals.

doodling!

i think sometimes we get caught up in building spaces for things to keep them organized, like that's the whole point of bujo. you create a page layout to do a specific function and then you fill it out. but that doesn't account for the stuff you haven't made a page for, stuff that would be blight in a bujo. we also think that a whole page needs to be devoted to a specific thing, or a notebook needs to be devoted to its subject. but you an also just...not do that.

it's a lot of work to setting up a bujo. work i would love to have the energy and aesthetic inclinations to do. but i don't. so i do the next best thing which is fill up every page in the most chaotic way possible.

poorly scanned example pages under the cut:

these are notes i took during my rewatch of Mockingjay in preparation of writing Wind of the New World.

notes about leveling my Genshin team, and notes about a story i was working on. and a to do list.

working through a plot knot in Skinless.

Stardew Valley farm planning. and a grocery list i think.

i don't recommend this method for everyone. i think if i were to have read this post 2 years ago my thought would be, "what the fuck is wrong with you." but it works for me and makes me happy, and as long as all the important information is safely indexed and retrievable, it doesn't matter how messy the pages get.

[mickstart]

tell me about your favorite blorbo? like ramble tf away about it, let the hyperfixation take over, i'm so fuckin ready to know everything about them xD

okay I was gonna talk about aventurine but @chevaliermalfets also said I had permission to talk about Adler so.

Russell Adler Propaganda Hour

Okay so first I have to explain Call of Duty Black Ops.

Call of Duty is a franchise but within that franchise there are 3 studios all working on separate games with their own lore. Black Ops, or Blops, is a "universe" within call of duty and it's pretty much the only thing the Treyarch studio works on. (It's kind of connected to the other universes now, I DON'T have the time to get into that so just forget it. Like Dumbledore's sexuality, it is not relevant to Adler's journey.) Black Ops spans 80 years and the lore got Convoluted but they refocusd it again with the last 2 games like: okay. Blops is about top secret CIA operations during the second half of the 20th century.

Black Ops Cold War

The fifth blops came has a simple introductory plot. "It's 1981, you're CIA agents, there's a Bad Russian (Perseus) who wants to do things with Nukes. Standard cold war aesthetics shit. Go get the bad russian. Here's a team led by your NEW BEST FRIEND Adler." You mostly play as Bell. Adler is Bell's Best Friend they fought in vietnam together Adler always wants Bell on his team they're besties. Also, yes, this is the call of duty where you choose your pronouns and Reagan respects them. Much like Reagan I will be using they/them for Bell because I'm not a coward.

So yeah this plot is simple. Adler and you have been chasing the Bad Russian for years. You do various chaotic shit during this campaign. (Sneaking into East Berlin through the underground metro. Breaking into THE FUCKING KGB HQ AND HAVING AN OPEN FIREFIGHT IN ITS VAULT? ADLER? WHAT THE FUCK?) But throughout the game you get little hints something Isn't Right with Bell. They forget things, their past isn't as clear as the other characters, the CIA handler overseeing your op, Hudson, oesn't Trust them and often he and Adler argue about bringing Bell along.

And then :) A mission goes Very Wrong, one of 2 characters die and Bell gets Fucked Up. Adler basically drags you back to the safehouse and the surviving team members start putting you on a gurney. Hudson starts yelling at Adler to stop wasting time, that Bell is no use to them anymore, and the team ignore you. You're like "aww, Adler cares about Bell so much he's gonna waste time to help the- Adler why are you pointing that needle at Bell's eye... OH MY FUCKING GOD!!"

And then you find out that up until like a month ago Bell was working FOR PERSEUS. And then a jealous associate turned on Bell - and you WATCHED THIS HAPPEN from the POV of Adler's team. Bell is a nameless grunt that got shot in a car in the first mission. Adler and the team found Bell, took them back to the CIA, and when Bell didn't break under torture, they BRAINWASHED BELL with MKUltra shit to believe they and Adler were best friends so they'd willingly give him information.

They basically erased Bell's fucking psyche and replaced their memories with implanted memories from Adler's time in Vietnam. BELL IS NAMED AFTER THE BELL ADLER USED TO CONDITION THEM TO RESPOND POSITIVELY TO HIM. BELL HAS BEEN BRAINWASHED TO COMPLY AND OBEY WHENEVER ADLER SAYS "WE HAVE A JOB TO DO." THAT'S WHY ADLER TOOK YOU EVERYWHERE. THE BRAINWASHING IS CENTERED AROUND ADLER. HE CONTROLS BELL.

And you find this out as Adler is guiding you through a fucked up mindscape based on one of his Vietnam missions. He's trying to get you to open a red door - a kind of visual metaphor for the block you've had in your mind protecting the last SLIVER of free will and information you've managed to hold back from him. And as Adler gets angrier and pumps you full of more and more drugs the dreamscape starts getting trippier. At one point he's like "ENOUGH FUCKING AROUND!" and the visuals crumble around Bell and they get flung back to where Adler wants them to be. At one point Bell starts remembering the lab where this happened and Adler just goes "-exasperated sigh- Why is Bell in the lab? I don't want the lab, I want the bunker."

And then Bell wakes up. And let me tell you it's genuinely extremely effective going from Adler being 'protective' of you the whole game to Adler having a hand around your throat cursing you out like you're his enemy. Because you are. After Some Arguing Adler is like "okay, tell me where Perseus is." and YOU can choose to either lie or tell the truth. If you lie Europe gets nuked, but you get to stab Adler in the heart and kill everyone else who did this to you and reunite with Perseus who is immediately Very Concerned about you and Very Proud of you for managing to survive this ordeal.

If you tell the truth (the canonical ending) you get a long cutscene where Adler monologues about "A Few Good Men Making Bad Decisions To Protect The Free World" basically the motto of the US Military's imperialism. And then you and the team stop Perseus and save the world ... and then in the credits, Adler takes Bell up a hill and says "this little thing between you and me wasn't personal" ... and he draws to shoot you and Bell draws like a milisecond after bc after all the programming Bell can read Adler just as well as Adler can read them they're supposed to be bffs after all.

It cuts to black like the fucking sorpanos but the implication is that Adler *KILLS* Bell. Because they've outlived their usefulness. If you choose The Right Thing, Adler KILLS you presumably on CIA orders bc Adler only cares about The Mission.

And that's just COLD WAR!!!!!!!!!!

(Adler pic for making it this far)

Black Ops 6

10 years later during Operation Desert Storm. This game isn't even ABOUT Ader, except it is bc he steals every scene he's in. Case in point, he enters the campaign by striding out from behind a car, coming out of the dust like a demon, and shooting a friendly, unarmed man in the head with no explanation, justification, or apology, while everyone screams. One character literally says "Adler!" but not like they're calling out to him, like the way you might call out a warning like "gunship!" "tank!"

(And then they wrestle with him and he's out of breath and panting and on his knees w/ a gun to his head heehee hoohoo I'm normal I'm normal.)

Anyway Adler has been on the run for a while because he's suspected of being a mole who fucked up a crucial CIA operation. He claims he's being framed, and the CIA are compromised. He gets thrown in a CIA black site and once you investigate and find out he's probably telling the truth you have to put a team together to uncover The Truth and to break him out.

And THEN you have to deal with his chaos for the rest of the campaign the highlights of which include: shooting an unarmed man and going "whaaaat? :( he was going for his gun" when called out, trying to throw a confessing, surrendered man into a jet plane engine, and just carrying CIA MKultra torture drugs around in his bag and pulling them out when necessary like they're chapsticks. Everything Adler does is so fucking funny in how cartoonishly evil it is he is a DELIGHT. This is Adler NOT pretending to be a decent guy like he was with Bell.

(Also you can indirectly ask him about Bell and he shuts that shit down immediately. >:) That's theirs. That's his and Bell's and nobody else will understand their fucked up hannibal lecter will graham antics.)

I don't even know how to summarise the plot except at one point a character is reliving her worst trauma and she claims Adler killed her parents in front of her when she was a child and they were CIA agents and Adler was ordered by the CIA to kill their own, and I started LAUGHING AND CLAPPING LIKE A SEAL it hit like meth. The game claims this did NOT happen and she has been misled but I refuse to accept that. It happened. Adler killed this women's parents in cold blood and then mentored her in the CIA. I hope he killed her pet hamster too. I hope he ate her last lunchable from the fridge and stole money from her piggy bank.

Yes, he is STILL SUPPOSED TO BE A PROTAGONIST. And you have to understand how incredible that is. Call of Duty does NOT let its characters be Proper Bastards. Call of Duty characters always need to turn to the camera and say "but of course, as a us military soldier, I would never commit a war crime because we are the most ethical military in the world."

But Adler is a *protagonist* and he not only commits war crimes, when other characters judge him for it he's like "uh we work for the CIA dipshit the blanket war crimes permission came free with our badge bc WE get to decide when a war crime is necessary! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A!"

Call of Duty doing this is like a dog learning to ride a bike. That's not an expectation I ever had for the dog, nor is it something I thought he could do. Frankly, I don't know what this dog riding a bike MEANS in the grand scheme of things. But goddamn that sure is a dog riding a bike and I want to see more of it.

Questions You Might Have

What's with the facial scar?

Adler refuses to tell the real story like any good Bond Villain he just HAS a cool scar covering half his face.

Why does he dress like that?

BC it's a period piece in the sexy Spies And Soviets era and he's watched too many movies. I hope he went to see Top Gun

Why is he like this?

>:) Because he's a beast created by the US Military's total lack of oversight and self-legitimising discourse that means anything is true and permitted as long as they say it is.

Why is he so funny?

Bc he's a call of duty character who is aware they are in call of duty and therefore any attempt to minimise their evil is wasted breath and pointless effort. This is like the reverse of parody. This is face-value "yes we really mean this" taken to such a ridiculous extreme it BECOMES Parody. This is like the reverse of why Senator Armstrong saying "Make America Great Again" 4 years before Trump Presidency happened hits like crack.

How did call of duty make this?

I have no fucking idea dude I think someone from metal gear snuck into the building.

Wait didn't you tag something as AdlerBell but they-

I subscribe to the NBC Hannibal school of "sometimes ruining someone's life can be intensely romance coded if you two are the only two people alive who can understand what went on between you." I think Bell should eat him.

Are you okay?

Absolutely not. I think Adler has MKUltra'd me.

[coco-bee]

COCO’S REVIEW: RAMSHACKLE (PILOT)

Welcome to Coco’s Review! Where I review and breakdown episodes, movies and etc and overthink every tiny detail and/or give my thoughts and opinions :D

Today I’ll be discussing Ramshackle by Zeddyzi

Ramshackle is an animated pilot by online creator Zeddyzi that’s been in development since 2010 and has a thesis film, webtoon and now an animated pilot! (I’ll be discussing the Pilot)

It’s about three street rats Vinnie, Stone and Skipp who try to survive the grimy and gross streets of Ramshackle with their various scams and schemes while trying not to die!

The animation is really good! The characters have very expressive faces and sharp silhouettes! All the designs feel so angular and have a very warm color palette! Not to mention there’s the sorta coffee paper or brown paper texture to it that I really like!!

And it takes what Disney did during their Bronze Age with the scribbly line art and that scratchy kinda feel. (even using crosshatching)

I also find it interesting how the town of Ramshackle is set in its own universe and not sticking to a specific timeline with its mix of different vintage aesthetics mixed together! (in the creator’s words)

To me it feels a lot like a mix of the Great Depression and the Victorian Era!

The humor is a lovechild of early season Spongebob and Gravity Falls! Because this pilot is so fucking funny for no reason 😭

It just has so much visual comedy and dialogue that makes you go “Did I hear that correctly??”

I’ll be honest the plot isn’t perfect but the characters and humor easily makes up for it and makes things very enjoyable!! THE LITTLE DETAILS THEY PUT IN THE BACKGROUND JUST CRACK ME UP WITH EVERY REWATCH!

These are some of my personal favorite details but it’s more fun to spot them yourself!!

I also want to talk about Maggot who is a baby the trio found and decided to try and raise!

I’m not going to spoil the ending BUT MAGGOT IS ABSOLUTELY AMAZING!

I love how they didn’t go with just the dumb baby trope with Maggot- I swear he is such an entertaining part of the pilot I’m a little sad he probably won’t appear in the series again 😔

And just the comedy they got out of him is so great I love him smm

The main trio are just as entertaining!

They complement each other so well!! The way they bounce off each other and have very different personalities but the same goals

I’ll get this out of the way VINNIE IS SO DAMN HOT ARGHHH LIKE AAAAA I LOVE HER SMM- Shes so badass and lowkey reminds me of Grunkle Stan personality wise

Stone is basically the mandatory emo boy but now hes upgraded to main character- I love his unlimited supply of alcoholic drinks and I hope tumblr loves him

Skipp is just underrated imo 😭 I love how he has a heart of gold but he also doesnt mind scamming people (he has no other choice anyway

The way theyre so caring with Maggot just warms my heart<33

THEYRE SUCH A GREAT FRIEND GROUP I CANTTT

Anyway there are only a few complaints I have- some of the jokes can be hit or miss and it gets a bit chaotic which can possibly be a little overwhelming. Bug I want to talk about the “scam” aspect of the main premise, I feel like the webtoon explored that part of the trio’s lives much better than the pilot. They could’ve done a lot of interesting scams with a baby but applying him to a baby pageant isn’t really a scam.

The obvious commentary on the high class’s treatment of the lower class feels a bit on the nose in my opinion (like it feels almost too obvious) but doesn’t spoil the experience. Like I said the humor and character still make up for it!!

I highly recommend this pilot and series!!

Congrats to Zeddyzi and their team for bringing this year long project to life!

This is Coco typing… Thank you for reading!

[popstart]

gwourtney and/or mkulia?

Gwourtney: cute and fun. i like them.

What made you ship it? i liked their mini one-sided beef in action. before that i just was like what if they kissed bc they were my favorite characters at the time LOL (this was all a long time ago.) then i watched wt and all stars and was like. alr. i can get behind this as an actual ship yk.

What are your favorite things about the ship? The idea of both of them being outside their comfort zone in a relationship is soooo fucking awesome to me. like gwen whos only friends are very hardcore goth (see total ddddddddd island), never having a lot of relations outside of that community and courtney whos whole life has been pushed to be very perfect and them both ending up with someone thats pretty much entirely the opposite of them. and its not just their aesthetics and upbringings but their personalities are very different as well. courtney is very intense and gwen is so along for the ride.

Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship? fandom portrayal of it is really boring most of the time and sometimes thats a good thing but its usually not. they have to butt heads SOMETIMES. also gwourtney is not a domestic ship and saying they are feels lesbophobic (joke but only a little bit)

Mkulia: im so glad theyre as big as they are

What made you ship it? in s1 i really loved the thing they had going on. i dont say i super actively ship a lot of things but i only rly glanced at them in s1. like i liked the ship but just kinda from afar. when s2ep1 released and everyone lost their minds i was excited to see what they would do with them

What are your favorite things about the ship? the simultaneous respect yet disrespect they have for eachother LOL. its a big will they wont they for basically everything they do. they are VERY unpredictable as characters and together its really chaotic

Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship? i like the idea of it being unrequited/one sided. a lot. its like the potential angst of the "you do! you like me! #bff" thing times a thousand. eventually they always find it in them to get together but the time between that is so unbearable

[raven-the-claw]

A Complete Guide To Chaotic Academia

bc its my fav aesthetic and there is not enough content about it

Outfits

most people say that chaotic academia is just dark academia but a little bit more messy, and, well, chaotic. the truth is, chaotic academia is A LOT more messy than dark academia. you can still use dark academia as kind of a "base", but you are going to replace your blazers with flannels, your turtlenecks with tshirts. as for pants, you can go with litteraly anything: cigarette pants, tailored trousers, ripped-up jeans or normal black leggings. i personally really ike ripped up overalls bc they give that "i dont really give a damn, im so misunderstood, my parents didnt love me, im a crazy lonely introverted teenage child" vibe...idk. whatever you wear, make sure you feel comfortable in it! even tho in chaotic academia there are almost no rules at all, here are some things that might help you!

colours: any earthy tones are fine, brown, caramel, dark green, dark red, white, etc etc

fictional characters that might inspire you:

-remus lupin

- any dpc character

- jess mariano

- sydney novak

accesories: flannels (a personal fav + they make even the most boring fit look better), cardigans, converse (bonus points if you draw/write on them or if you have them laced in a weird way), bracelets or necklaces that mean something to you, harry potter back packs, tote bags...

hairstyles: whatever you want, just make sure your hair is ALWAYS messy, looking like you just fucking woke up

Activities and Traits

ok now we're getting to the actually important part bc (repeat after me): chaotic academia is not about how you look, its about how you live and how you act. so here r some thing that might help:

- annotating books with the most unhinged random thoughts

- learning poetry or speeches word for word but not remembering most of the things for school

- studying in the (school) library and being besties with the librarian (optional)

- leaving notes (on trees, mailboxes or library books) for strangers to find

- "studying while listening to classical music" and then instead of studying you end up agressivly mouthing your favorite song

- im sure yall already heard this one, but yes, swearing and slag while discussing deep academic topics is incredibly important

- speaking of important topics: posting something important on social media knowing no one will read it

- doodles on your hands 24/7 (NO SUSAN, I DONT GIVE A DAMN THAT ITS BAD FOR MY SKIN)

- sarcasm. a lot.

- random thoughts

- random quotes

- knowing a ton of conspiracy theories that you dont even beileve in by heart

- listening to all different types of podcasts

- one day reading the classics, the next ya fantasy and day after that ao3 smut

- multifandom, multishipper

- tea/coffee addiction

- adding b.c. to todays date when writing it in school

- random thoughts and the weirdest annotations in your school notebooks, especially the classes that you find boring

- "going to the bathroom" and then spending half of your math class drawing/reading/smoking/crying/thinking/whatever the fuck you wanna do there bc ur tired of everything

- stealing random stuff from stores (tho it is not encouraged blah blah blah)

- watching gilmore girls every fall

- telling people ur favorite colour is green even tho it isnt just to let them know that ur gay

- reading in class, on breaks, at home, parks, meetings, aethletic events, and generally all the fucking time

- doing (mostly) everything last minute

- bad at photography, but you enjoy it

- cold tea my beloved

- wearing one item every day: it can either be a necklace, a flannel, a bracelet, a badge, headphones, earrings etc etc

- extremely messy handwriting, always writing with black pen

- crying at least once a day, but only when ur alone, being super emotional but never showing it

- hobbies include reading, screaming in your pillow, learning unique languages that you will probably never use, rewatching dead poets society, harry potter, enola holmes, end of the fucking world and gilmore girls

- massive bookworm, reads all the time, always has a book with them

- skipping class, not that often tho

- 💫anger issues💫

- hyperactive and lazy at the same time

- uses big words but makes fun of other people when they do it

- writes (rebellious) book quotes everywhere, every single one of their notebooks had IF WE BURN, YOU BURN WITH US written in them lol

- random useless powerpoints

- analysing taylor swift's folklore and evermore instead of sheakspeare because its just better

- retired almost-emo, had a phase when they wore black and acted all mysterious but were never really emo i cant explain it

- likes mcr. this one speaks for itself.

- gay and sad. no explanation needed.

Books, Movies and Music

Books:

- Harry Potter by you know who (WE DONT SUPPORT HER THO)

- The Secret History by Donna Tartt

- Night School by CJ Daugherty (is that how u spell it lol)

- The Ninth House by Leigh Bardugo

- Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo

- Heartstopper by Alice Oseman

- Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen

- Emma by Jane Austen

- Hamlet by Do I Really Need To Say Who

- The Perks Of Being A Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky

- The Picture of Dorain Gray by Oscar Wilde

- Frankenstein by Marry Shelley

Movies/TV Shows

- end of the fucking world

- heartstopper

- harry potter

- enola holmes

- dead poets society

- gilmore girls

- httyd (no kidding lol)

im not really a film girlie so if yall have any recs please lmk

Music:

- Mother Mother

- Taylor Swift (obviously)

- Lana Del Slay

- Conan Gray

- Olivia Rodrigo

- My Chemical Romance

- Lovejoy

- Bowie

- Queen

- Radiohead

- Björk

- Those random Disney songs i know you scream to at 3am

also whoever sings the IMJUSTATEENAGEDIRTBAGBAABBYY song

here is my playlist if yall wanna listen to it

hope that helps lol