#its one of the director of the passenger's movies!

[sandpapersnowman]

CARTER SMITH'S SWALLOWED IS NOW ON TUBI FOR FREE BTW

[bondshotel]

July 6, 1964 - The Beatles' first feature film, A Hard Day's Night, had its première at the London Pavilion.

A Hard Day's Night is a 1964 British musical comedy film directed by Richard Lester and starring the Beatles—John Lennon, Paul McCartney, George Harrison, and Ringo Starr—during the height of Beatlemania. It was written by Alun Owen and originally released by United Artists. The film portrays 36 hours in the lives of the group.

The film was a financial and critical success. Forty years after its release, Time magazine rated it as one of the all-time great 100 films. In 1997, British critic Leslie Halliwell described it as a "comic fantasia with music; an enormous commercial success with the director trying every cinematic gag in the book" and awarded it a full four stars.[The film is credited as being one of the most influential of all musical films, inspiring numerous spy films, the Monkees' television show and pop music videos. In 1999, the British Film Institute ranked it the 88th greatest British film of the 20th century.

The movie's strange title originated from something said by Ringo Starr, who described it this way in an interview with disc jockey Dave Hull in 1964: "We went to do a job, and we'd worked all day and we happened to work all night. I came up still thinking it was day I suppose, and I said, 'It's been a hard day ...' and I looked around and saw it was dark so I said, '... night!' So we came to A Hard Day's Night."

PLOT

Bound for a London show from Liverpool, the Beatles escape a horde of fans ("A Hard Day's Night"). Once they are aboard the train and trying to relax, various interruptions test their patience: after a dalliance with a female passenger, Paul's grandfather is confined to the guard's van and the four lads join him there to keep him company. John Lennon, Paul McCartney, George Harrison, and Ringo Starr play a card game, entertaining some schoolgirls before arriving at their desired destination ("I Should Have Known Better").

Upon arrival in London, the Beatles are driven to a hotel, only to feel trapped inside. They are tasked to answer numerous letters and fan mail in their hotel room but instead, they sneak out to party ("I Wanna Be Your Man", "Don't Bother Me", "All My Loving"). After being caught by their manager Norm (Norman Rossington), they return to find out that Paul's grandfather John (Wilfrid Brambell) went to the casino. After causing minor trouble at the casino, the group is taken to the theatre where their performance is to be televised. After rehearsals ("If I Fell"), the boys leave through a fire escape and dance around a field but are forced to leave by the owner of the property ("Can't Buy Me Love"). On their way back to the theatre, they are separated when a woman named Millie (Anna Quayle) recognizes John as someone famous but cannot recall who he is. George is also mistaken for an actor auditioning for a television show featuring a trendsetter hostess. The boys all return to rehearse another song ("And I Love Her") and after goofing around backstage, they play another song to impress the makeup artists ("I'm Happy Just to Dance with You").

While waiting to perform, Ringo is forced to look after Paul's grandfather and decides to spend some time alone reading a book. Paul's grandfather, a "villain, a real mixer", convinces him to go outside to experience life rather than reading books. Ringo goes off by himself ("This Boy" instrumental). He tries to have a quiet drink in a pub, takes pictures, walks alongside a canal, and rides a bicycle along a railway station platform. While the rest of the band frantically and unsuccessfully attempts to find Ringo, he is arrested for acting in a suspicious manner. Paul's grandfather joins him shortly after attempting to sell photographs wherein he forged the boys' signatures. Paul's grandfather eventually makes a run for it and tells the rest of the band where Ringo is. The boys all go to the station to rescue Ringo but end up running away from the police back to the theatre ("Can't Buy Me Love") and the concert goes ahead as planned. After the concert ("Tell Me Why", "If I Fell", "I Should Have Known Better", "She Loves You"), the band is taken away from the hordes of fans via helicopter.

From beatlesbible:

The première was attended by The Beatles and their wives and girlfriends, and a host of important guests including Princess Margaret and Lord Snowdon. Nearby Piccadilly Circus was closed to traffic as 12,000 fans jostled for a glimpse of the group.

“I remember Piccadilly being completely filled. We thought we would just show up in our limo, but it couldn't get through for all the people. It wasn't frightening - we never seemed to get worried by crowds. It always appeared to be a friendly crowd; there never seemed to be a violent face.”

~ Paul McCartney, Anthology

It was a charity event held in support of the Variety Club Heart Fund and the Docklands Settlements, and the most expensive tickets cost 15 guineas (£15.75).

After the screening The Beatles, the royal party and other guests including The Rolling Stones enjoyed a champagne supper party at the Dorchester Hotel, after which some of them adjourned to the Ad Lib Club until the early hours of the morning.

[mrs-stans]

Golden Globes Close Calls Decided: ‘Anora,’ The Apprentice,’ ‘Heretic,’ ‘A Real Pain,’ Others Stake Claims As Dramas or Musical/Comedies (Exclusive)

THR reports on the submission plans for all of the top contenders ahead of the Nov. 4 entry deadline.

BY SCOTT FEINBERG

Filmmakers and distributors of awards-hopefuls have until Nov. 4 to submit their category preference — drama versus musical or comedy — to the Golden Globes organization, which reserves the right to overturn any classification that it finds egregiously inaccurate.

Some of this year’s cases are inarguable — for instance, Netflix’s Emilia Pérez, in which characters spontaneously burst into song, is clearly a musical (if not a comedy), and A24’s The Brutalist, in which an immigrant faces all sorts of harrowing hurdles, is clearly a drama. There are, however, also plenty of close-calls, about which many have made assumptions, but, in most cases, not confirmed.

The Hollywood Reporter has been working the phones and can now report which way almost every contender is breaking. This intel is, of course, subject to change prior to Nov. 4, and to being overturned by the Globes thereafter — but it is current as of this writing.

Joining Emilia Pérez in the the musical/comedy field will be several other musicals, including Universal’s Wicked; Warners’ Joker: Folie à Deux; Sony Classics’ Kneecap; Disney’s Mufasa: The Lion King; and Paramount’s Better Man and Mean Girls. But THR can confirm that a number of pretty dark films will also be entered there, most notably Neon’s Anora, the story of a sex worker who gets mixed up with shady Russians; Searchlight’s A Real Pain, about cousins who visit Poland to pay tribute to their late grandmother; A24’s A Different Man, the story of a man with neurofibromatosis who undergoes surgery to reverse it, and Heretic, a horror flick in which a home visit by Mormon missionaries goes wrong; and, as Gold Derby previously reported and some are likely to raise objections to, Amazon/MGM’s Challengers, in which young tennis players wind up in a love triangle.

Also in the musical/comedy field: dramedies (Netflix’s Hit Man; Searchlight’s Nightbitch and Kinds of Kindness; Focus’ Dìdi and Piece by Piece; Magnolia’s Thelma; Sony’s Saturday Night and Fly Me to the Moon; and Sony Classics’ Between the Temples); broader comedies (Disney’s Deadpool & Wolverine; Universal’s The Fall Guy and Argylle; Warners’ Beetlejuice Beetlejuice; Amazon/MGM’s My Old Ass; Apple’s Wolfs; and Sony Classics’ Wicked Little Letters); and, as was made possible by a rule change in 2021, animated features (Universal’s The Wild Robot; Disney/Pixar’s Inside Out 2; Disney’s Moana 2; and Focus’ Piece by Piece).

Some films that perhaps could have been pushed for a musical/comedy classification, but will instead be entered as a drama, include Briarcliff/Rich Spirit’s The Apprentice, which is essentially a buddy film about Donald Trump and Roy Cohn; A24’s Queer, a trippy film about the colorful escapades of a William S. Burroughs stand-in; and Sony Classics’ Daddio, in which a taxi driver (Sean Penn) and passenger (Dakota Johnson) banter during a long ride.

There are a bunch of movies this year that contain a lot of music but will not be entered in the musical/comedy race — an acknowledgement that they are really dramas with music: Searchlight’s Bob Dylan portrait A Complete Unknown; Netflix’s Maria Callas biopic Maria (meaning its leading lady, Angelina Jolie, will not have to go up against the streamer’s Emilia Pérez leading lady, Karla Sofía Gascón); Focus’ Amy Winehouse biopic Back to Black; and Paramount’s Bob Marley biopic Bob Marley: One Love.

In a different era of the Globes, some films of this sort were able to sneak past the guardians and land in the musical/comedy category, which was usually thinner — for example, A Complete Unknown director James Mangold’s 2005 Johnny Cash and June Carter Cash biopic Walk the Line. But these days, the revamped organization behind the Globes doesn’t let that sort of thing happen. Films in which characters play musicians who perform songs, as opposed to films that feature characters who spontaneously break into song, almost always wind up classified as dramas whether they like it or not (see 2018’s Bohemian Rhapsody and A Star Is Born).

The drama field was always, of course, going to include Focus’ Conclave, Nosferatu and The Bikeriders; Paramount’s Gladiator II and September 5; Sony Classics’ The Room Next Door, I’m Still Here and The Outrun; Apple’s Blitz; Warner’s Dune: Part Two, Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga, Horizon: An American Saga – Chapter 1 and Juror #2; A24’s Babygirl, Civil War, Sing Sing, Babygirl and We Live in Time; Amazon/MGM’s Nickel Boys, The Fire Inside and Unstoppable; Netflix’s The Piano Lesson, His Three Daughters and Shirley; Disney’s Young Woman and the Sea; Vertical’s The Order; Sideshow/Janus’ All We Imagine as Light; Kino Lorber’s Oh, Canada; Neon’s The Seed of the Sacred Fig and Longlegs; Roadside’s The Last Showgirl; Roadside/Vertical’s Lee; Shout!’s The Dead Don’t Hurt; Falling Forward’s Day of the Fight; Bleecker Street’s Hard Truths; Lionsgate’s Small Things Like These and White Bird; IFC/Sapan’s Ghostlight; and Sony’s Here.

There is really only one wild-card still out there: MUBI’s The Substance, in which Demi Moore plays an aging movie star who goes to extreme measures to try to retain her viability in the industry. I can see arguments on both sides for this one, and apparently so can MUBI and Moore’s team, who are still deliberating about what to do. On the one hand, one could argue that it’s a very dark drama turned horror flick. But on the other hand, one could certainly call it a satire, sending up a business in which youth and beauty are prioritized above all else. To me, it’s a modern-day Sunset Blvd. (1950), which straddled those two descriptions — and ultimately competed at the Globes as a drama and took home four awards, including best actress.

[leucrotta]

Werewolf Watch - #2

I had a little difficulty selecting the film for this week’s review. My first pick turned out to be a Beowulf retelling (an obvious occupational hazard here), and the second had a title that I ultimately decided wasn’t respectful to talk about. In short, it was the name of a Native American concept that’s been pretty badly appropriated already, especially in recent years, and especially in online spaces. No need for me to make that worse. Perhaps including every werewolf or werewolf-adjacent movie I found wasn’t the best idea, but that’s what second thoughts are for. Second thoughts and third tries, which ultimately handed me...

BEAST: A MONSTER AMONG MEN

I’m realizing that there being little information about a film is probably going to be a running theme with Werewolf Watch. As much of the viewing list is made up of indie films, this shouldn’t have been a surprise. Beast is naturally among these, with nearly all of its cast and crew being unknowns who don’t even have headshots on IMDB, much less a long list of credits. (This causes a somewhat amusing moment when a synopsis spoils the film’s villain by the actor’s name. Which, of course, means absolutely nothing to me.) The sole exception is its director, one Mike Lenzini, at the helm of such classics as Manscaping, Extraterrestrial Encounters: The Greys, and Alien Apocalypse: Could Humanity Survive? At least we’re in the right genre. (Okay, perhaps not that first one.) Once again, I have no idea what to expect. Scream of the Wolf had bad reviews, as does Beast, but that first one was alright. Maybe Mr. Lenzini can surprise me once again?

Or maybe not. The premise seems to be a fairly straightforward “cabin in the woods”-type slasher, with five vacationing bros, and what must be a werewolf in the killer role. (We can only hope.) But is the titular Beast one of the vacationers themselves? Only time will tell...

(Please be aware that this review WILL contain spoilers!

TWs for this review include (very brief) mentions of SA and suicide.)

The Plot

The film opens with five guys (sadly no burgers nor fries) driving in a car, playing “Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon”, and doing a pretty bad job of it. This is infinitely irritating to one character, who we will later find out is named Mike. The others, for the most part, don’t distinguish themselves, except for one guy, who broods against the rear window, glowering in his black hoodie. Honestly, it’s kind of funny, and it gets even funnier when the movie stops to let all of the other characters stare collectively at the brooding guy until the scene abruptly ends.

At a gas station, because every horror movie about a drive must include a scene with one, we discover that Brooding Guy isn’t friends with the others, except for the driver. They used to be friends. The oldest of friends. Maybe. The dialogue is very confusing. All that’s clear is that Mike hates Brooding Guy, and the feeling is very mutual. On we go, into the obligatory driving montage. It’s here where the driver, whose name is Bill, informs the others that they will be staying at a cabin with no internet or cell service. For some reason, none of them knew where they were going before they got into what is later revealed to be a six hour car ride. The musical accompaniment for the drive is quite awful, and sounds like a cross between a bad Nine Inch Nails cover band and every 90s PS1 car racing video game soundtrack.

Let’s take just a second to establish the main cast, as things do get a bit confusing later, and the movie isn’t doing anything interesting right now anyway. We have the driver, Bill, who is boring; the passenger seat rider, Mike, who is rude and likes to toss out random slurs; Brooding Guy, aka Eli; a character that I assume is meant to be the comedic relief, Sean; and finally, awkward guy Chris. Mike and Eli get into a bit of a (one-sided) spat, which the music thinks I should be sad about. This means more knock-off NIN beats. The movie has gotten so boring at this point that even the characters are falling asleep. I nearly turn the film off, but decide it’s not far in enough to give up.

[Narrator Voice: Leu would later regret this.]

Finally, we’re at the cabin. It looks just like every other tourist rental in the Smokies, though I don’t actually know where this was filmed. After a quick and pointless tour by Mike (have to get our money’s worth out of this location), the boys settle down to make some weenies over the campfire, and of course, to slap each other with them.

Quietly, loner Eli goes to the truck by himself. He snatches the keys on his way, sneaking. From the truck, he withdraws a huge knife. Which he brings back to the fire so he can… cut his hot dogs. Sure. After an insult from Mike, he wanders off alone into the woods, followed by Bill (who is, remember, his only actual friend here). As he searches for Eli, Bill hears an ominous growl.

We cut back to Mike, Sean, and Chris, now playing “fuck, marry, kill” with female celebrities. Stay classy, boys. Not long (and certainly not long enough) into their banter, they are interrupted by an unearthly scream from the woods. Anyone with any experience among the wilderness will probably recognize this sound as a male elk’s bugle. In the context of the film, however, I have no idea what it’s supposed to be. A wolf howl?

After huddling close to the cabin in fear, the boys decide to go look for their friend (and his friend). With the keys still in Eli’s pocket, they are forced to go on foot. I, the viewer, resign myself to many, many shots of people vaguely stumbling through the dark woods. Case in point:

Yeah. There's supposed to be three people in that shot.

It’s from this point on that things just sort of… happen, one after another. Following some confusing dialogue (“where did the sound come from?” “I’m not sure, but I’m pretty sure it was this way”) one of the boy’s trips over a mangled corpse- oh no, it’s Bill! Now comes the first of many, many (MANY) arguments: did Eli do this? (Mike sure thinks so.) Was there really a girl screaming? What do they do now? Ultimately they decide it’s a good idea to carry Bill’s dead body around the forest in the dark, now lost. Seems like a smart course of action.

The boys stumble upon a camp. Mike sneaks up to the tent, wherein a truly pointless sex scene is taking place. He watches like a creep.

He then wakes everyone up, tells them the situation, and for some reason gets them involved. The new characters, whose names I am not going to bother remembering, consist of four people- though there used to be six. Two are missing, and we will never find out what happened to them. Which is fine, because as soon as the new group of seven (plus Bill’s dead body) hears another elk bugle mysterious scream, the two girls decide that their missing friends are dead, and immediately begin to mourn them. The film continues with even more people now wandering aimlessly in the dark. Bill’s body has vanished without note. The movie is getting bored with itself again, relentlessly showing us images of the full moon.

At some point (I’ll be honest, I missed how it started) the newer characters (group B) begin to fight with the original three (group A). At some other point during this, one of the newer characters goes missing. You can see why I didn’t bother to learn their names. There’s more arguing, and I’m not even sure what they ultimately decide, because I zoned out. Apparently they decided that the two groups should go their separate ways again, making this entire plot thread pointless.

There’s even more arguing. An actual human scream, followed by… I’m not sure if those are gunshots, or just the soundtrack being irritating again. One of the girls from group B runs into the arms of group A. She is traumatized by something. There’s more arguing and once again, I consider ending the movie, but at this point, we’re fairly close to the end. (Yes, really.)

[Leu will once again regret this choice.]

The boys somehow find the body of one of group B’s men, and take his keys. Mike tries to snap the traumatized girl out of her panic, but in doing so knocks her over onto a rock, which kills her. This takes forever.

Is it so much to ask that this movie just give me the werewolf? How much time do we really even have, here?

Thanks, Mike. Let’s move on.

After some discussion, it turns out that Eli might be the killer, and for a reason. These are my exact notes as I watched:

“turns out Eli might be doing this because his sister killed herself and I’m going to guess it right now, it’s because Mike assaulted her”

Surprise surprise, I was right. Although I didn’t guess that Sean apparently helped. Chris, now the only living non-garbage person, (except perhaps Eli,) is reasonably angry, and stalks off. Sean runs after him, leaving Mike alone. It’s at this moment that I realize what’s truly happening here. Happening again, rather. Because this is about to be the second time. The second time in Werewolf Watch (which, I just want to note, has only had two posts so far) that I review a werewolf movie with no werewolf in it.

I can’t believe this. Suckered again. I become almost as reasonably angry as Chris, whose admonishment of Sean is correct, even though the acting is still bad.

Blah blah blah, the two stumble upon where Bill’s body was, but it’s been dragged off. Sean goes to touch the blood and… something??? happens??? Mike wanders alone, in the dark night of the soul, or whatever. He finds the car that he has the keys to, and the movie tries desperately to wake up the audience with a car alarm. It does not work. Mike drives away into the sunrise. Somehow, the movie isn’t over yet.

Mike stops at a lake and gets out for some reason, acting like he’s about to puke as he stumbles around in the dust. He has discovered all of the bodies, piled in one spot. Sean is among them, but Chris is absent. Mike continues to stumble off into the woods. Eli appears. With a knife. Mike bigfoot-walks into frame. (Oh how I regret using those words now.) Eli looks high af.

Mike sees the knife and runs screaming at Eli.

Eli… IS IMMEDIATELY KILLED BY BIGFOOT????

I AM SCREAMING. CHOKING. DYING.

THIS IS INCREDIBLE. I HATE IT SO MUCH. PLEASE HELP ME I AM IN HELLLLLLL!!!!!

The Review

Well. Now that I’ve had a chance to collect myself, let’s just say that this movie did, in fact, surprise me. Unlike with Scream of the Wolf, this surprise was not so pleasant.

To be fair, I did laugh. I laughed so hard, in fact, that I choked. I don’t know if it was out of sheer absurdity or actual humor, if there’s even any actual humor to be derived here. I replayed the last few seconds of the film about three times, then sat for a while with my hands on my face. I know this is used often as hyperbole, but what did I just watch???

Not only is Beast: A Monster Among Men not a werewolf movie, but it’s not even a good movie at all. The acting is bad (except oddly enough for Mike), the music is bad, the pacing is abysmal, the story is nonsense, there are so many shots of people stumbling around in the dark, and even more scenes of people arguing. Constant arguing! All that lack of build up, all those shots of the full moon, those howling and growling sounds, the title, and for what! For the film to pull the rug out from under us in the last few moments, and become a bigfoot movie??? Listen, I’m not crazy. Look at this title card/poster again:

LOOK AT IT. WHAT PART OF THAT SAYS BIGFOOT AND NOT WEREWOLF??? WHAT PART, MR. LENZINI????

I give this movie a 1 out of 10.

Werewolf Effects

I don’t want to talk about it.

Werewolf Lore

Final Thoughts

Don’t watch this movie, for the love of all that you hold sacred. It will put you to sleep until the car alarm part, and then you’ll wake up just in time to see BIGFOOT ruin the movie. That was already not good.

At this point, I’m wondering if I should rename this post series “Werewolfless Watch”. Should I start screening movies ahead of time, looking up spoilers to make sure there are, in fact, werewolves? I don’t want to ruin my experience, but when will this madness end?

(Did I forget to mention that this movie had the gall to have an after-credits scene? That was just bigfoot walking around? No? Well it did. I hate you, Mr. Lenzini.)

[vvatchword]

YOU get a lighthouse. And YOU get a lighthouse. And YOU

I was researching deep-sea diving rigs, historical and otherwise, trying to figure out ways of getting my man Johnny Topside down on the seafloor in full diving gear without smushing him like a bug. Turns out that this is physically impossible. Deep-sea diving in a suit is only doable down to about 120 feet. However, the skyscrapers appear to be many times that size, with enough water overhead to obscure and shield them.

Creative Director Ken Levine is a notorious perfectionist, so the fact that he ignored water pressure is notable. Rapture is just too deep for anybody to be walking around down there.

Easy answer: Rapture is not a real place. It's all symbolism. I would consider BioShock "magical realism." There's plenty of support for this--not only that main characters are allegorical figures, but that BioShock is unquestionably a gnostic allegory, something I missed for years.

I began considering the idea that BioShock is actually a mystical journey, it's just subdued. If you can miss the gnostic foundations, you can miss the mystical traits.

Magical realism in-game includes (spoilers follow):

When the plane crashes, you don't see any other passengers. There were other passengers, and you can hear them, but you don't see them--just signs of them. When I first played the game, I didn't think anything about it; I figured it was an issue of resources and story design. You don't want to flood the level with a bunch of resource-eating, attention-grabbing NPCs. You want to start the story as it should be started: based on you, the individual player.

When you step into the lighthouse, the door shuts behind you and the lights come on. If you are roleplaying as a plane crash victim, that's a little weird. If you are player-in-a-video-game, not so much.

When Atlas reveals himself in the Smuggler Bay level, it's absolutely bizarre once you get past the twist. Why would Fontaine expose himself to danger like that? Well... once you take a step back, it's to realize how goddamn theatrical everything is. You are often required to watch cutscenes past windows--little shows, shall we say?

Speaking of "theatrical," why do you see so many theaters? And note the kind of theaters. We're not talking about movie theaters: we're talking about the theaters upon which one stages plays. When you are introduced to Big Daddies and Little Sisters, it's on a stage. The game is The Truman Show, and you're Truman.

Speaking of theatrical, the Fort Frolic level gives everything away. Constant theaters, but few to no theater screens (you are a real person wandering the false world constructed to teach you); the film reel marked "Irrational Games" in Sander Cohen's private box; pamphlets and posters for "Patrick and Moira." Jack Wynand was not conceived with what was real--the real Eve, Diane McClintock, who represents Rapture's citizens--but with the Shadow Eve, Jasmine Jolene, a fascinating (and false) fabrication reflecting misdirected desires. Listen to Sander Cohen's dialogue and you'll realize he's clearly laying out the entire idea behind the game--he's like its prophet. (I feel like I could write about Fort Frolic for about ten years.)

Eventually all of these elements bring the rest of the story into line: every part of the game experience is tailored to the player's most immediate needs. It becomes a story about ascendence: first accepting one's state, then transcending it. What is campy and goofy about it only ends up bringing attention to what is serious and "real." By bringing attention to its breaks with realism, BioShock hints at its true intent: to be much fucking smarter than it has any right being.

Anyway

Consider this: do you think that all the people on the airplane that Jack crashed went to different versions of the Lighthouse? Perhaps each one experienced a different and manufactured spiritual experience meant to bring them to a higher plane.

It's equally possible that they were nonentities--their unnecessary sacrifices symbolic of the selfish world below where the many are made to serve the one--but then I thought about BioShock Infinite. How equally possible is it that every individual is undergoing the struggle to transcend the false into the true?

That means everyone has a lighthouse... and that includes you and me.

[agentnico]

Most Anticipated Films of 2025

It’s already the end of 2024 - this year went ridiculously quick, and as such I believe I am due my late-twenties existential crisis any moment now. Before however that chaotic affairs comes crashing down I wish to look forward to 2025, which will hopefully bring a more exciting selection to my cinematic hobby, as 2024 in particular has been a most mediocre year at the movies. Having gone through my Letterboxd and the movie calendar, I’ve compiled a list of movies I’m having high hopes for to be good - doesn’t mean the final product will turn out any good, but one can hope. So without much further ado, these are the films I’m most interested in (in no particular order) watching in 2025…

SUPERMAN - Look, I am aware that many DC and Snyder Cut fans out there are highly displeased with the direction this franchise is going in, but honestly the DCEU was an absolute mess, and this universe is in high need of a revamp and restart. Bringing on James Gunn and Peter Safran as the heads of this new DC cinematic universe I’m truly excited for, as Safran is a long-time proven producer in the business and Gunn is one of the better superhero directors out there, having done wonders with the Guardians of the Galaxy franchise and his The Suicide Squad and Peacemaker projects for DC. So at the end of day why not give these two a chance? And Superman is now a highly important film for Warner Bros, as it needs to kickstart a new major film series, and get the fans and new audiences on board. First teaser looked fun (Krypto is going to be one cute dog!!), so yes, I am ready to look up!

WICKED: FOR GOOD - This one may be the most shocking entry on the list, as when I was going into 2024 I couldn’t care less about the Wicked movie adaptation. I had watched the original Weat End show with my wife, but in my eyes it felt very much as a musical made for the stage, as well as my passiveness for the Wizard of Oz world. I could care any less cents for the Tin Man, what can I say. However after seeing the first Wicked movie my opinion changed - aside from the plain MCU-style cinematography and lifeless directing, this movie was a wonderful and delightful piece of escapism, with wonderful songs, great performances from its leads and a very faithful adaptation of the stage play. Bring on the second one!

SHELBY OAKS - I have been following YouTuber Chris Stuckmann’s movie reviews since I was a teenager, so it’s great to see a success story in Hollywood come to life with him directing and getting his first movie distributed and released. Do I wish it was something other than a found-footage style horror flick? Maybe, but beggars can’t be chooses and I’m hoping Stuckmann will use his life experience of critical movie thinking to not drop down to the mistakes so many others have in this genre previously.

DEATH OF A UNICORN - We love us an A24 flick. More so we love an A24 flick with a high-end ridiculous concept, and Death of a Unicorn may just be that, where never-aging Paul Rudd and the stranger-lipped Jenna Ortega accidentally hit and run a unicorn, and then proceed to exploit the dead creature’s miraculous curative powers. So, you know, just a regular Tuesday for most folk, and with the likes of Will Poulter and Richard E. Grant among the cast this is expected to be a real hoot!

THE ENTERTAINMENT SYSTEM IS DOWN - Last time Ruben Östlund took on a cruise crisis. Now it’s on a plane! I wasn’t as big of a fan of TRIANGLE OF SADNESS, as there may have been a tad too much vomiting and diarrhoea for my tastes, however I still admired the ambition. With this new film, this is the provided plot summary: “When the entertainment system suddenly stops working onboard a long-haul flight, the passengers are stuck with no screens to look at and are forced to endure 15 hours of life without digital distraction. Chaos ensues.” I mean - that sounds like a zany and outlandish time, which could be both hilarious and a decent commentary on the modern phone-obsessed society we live in today. Also per Deadline, Östlund plans on including a scene where a young boy asks to borrow his older brother’s iPad and is told he has to wait five minutes. “And then I want to challenge the audience,” Östlund teases. “You stay with the kid in real time. And he’s looking in the catalog, putting it back and the restlessness is coming. So he asks his mother, ‘How much do we have left?’ And she says, ‘Well, now it’s four minutes and 45 seconds, you have to calm down.’ When the audience starts to realise that this is a real-time shot, I think a lot of people are going to be very, very frustrated," he said, still chuckling. "I want to create history."

MICKEY 17 - Multiple Robert Pattinsons? A crazy clone sci-fi black comedy concept? Made by the Academy Award winning director of Parasite? The trailers promising a wacky yet fun experience? Sign. Me. Up. Everyone needs more Bong in their lives!

THE BATTLE OF BAKTAN CROSS - Whenever Paul Thomas Anderson makes another film, that is event cinema. He’s one of those directors where his films can only be referred to as “films”, not “movies”. He’s an auteur in the fullest meaning of the term, and now he’s teaming up with Leonardo DiCaprio for his next feature, promising as always a wild experience. And maybe another Oscar for Leo? We still don’t have official plot details for the film. It’s all being kept hush-hush, although many signs have been pointing towards this potentially being a modern-day adaptation of Thomas Pynchon’s “Vineland.”

WILD HORSE - Martin McDonagh is coming off the most acclaimed film of his career, 2022’s The Banshees of Inisherin. It looks like his next one will be bringing back some familiar faces with Sam Rockwell and Christopher Walken. As per McDonagh’s own words “I think the next thing might be set in an Island, not in Ireland, like in ‘Banshees,’ but again to have the island be a character. So, that’s a scoop for you, I think that’s going to be the next thing.” There you go, it’s McDonagh doing his shtick on an island. Good stuff.

THE FANTASTIC FOUR: FIRST STEPS - Marvel really needs to get back on track. Many have complained about theirconsistent drop in quality, and with 2025 being one of their busiest years ever with 3 movies and 6 shows (talk about over saturation!) I’m not holding out much hope, though I am optimistic about this Fantastic 4 movie. Directed by Matt Shakman (WandaVision) and set in a 1960s-inspired retro-futuristic world, featuring a planet-eating cosmic being Galactus, voiced by the gravelly sounding Ralph Ineson. Please be good. Please!

WAKE UP DEAD MAN: A KNIVES OUT MYSTERY - Without a doubt my most anticipated release of the year. Say what you will about Rian Johnson’s Star Wars escapade, his take on the murder mystery genre with Daniel Craig’s Southern slurring detective Benoit Blanc is nothing short of top tier entertainment. Both Knives Out and Glass Onion were fantastic, and honestly I wouldn’t mind Craig and Johnson to keep making these movies for years to come. As long as they have the material, let Benoit keep untangling these twisted webs of lies.

Additionally I’m holding out for some more solid physical media releases in 2025 on 4K from the likes of Curzon and The Criterion Collection, as in fact physical media releases in 2024 was somewhat thriving and actually worth the price. Well, I say worth the price - the big collector’s set always cost over £40 which is too much, but nevertheless I appreciate that these remasters and transfers get a lot of work put into them, so I’m willing to churn out more cash for a worthy keepsake. My favourite physical media output in 2024 came from Curzon with the beautiful Paris Texas and Memories of Murder 4K sets; Arrow Video’s Man from U.N.C.L.E. Blu-ray/4k combo; the 40th anniversary Studiocanal release of The Third Man (packed inside a music box!). Some genuinely great items to add to the collection, so here’s hoping more of that for next year, as physical media is a dying breed so I’m ever so thankful that we still get special companies as the aforementioned and the likes of Second Sight and Indicator doing the great work they do. Now let’s just have 2025 makes cinema trips worthwhile again!

[arabella-interstellar]

TRIANGLE OF SADNESS (2023) made me very very very happy!

“H&M advertisements: You can be part of this mixed skin-coloured group and not for that much money. #everyonesequal #friendship #happylife #climatechange”… No, this is not a joke. Well, yeah it actually kind of is. But it is also one of the first lines said in the opening scene of ´Triangle of Sadness´ (2022), which perfectly illustrates the overall mood carried out for the rest of the movie. The movie is known for its eight-minute standing ovation during the 75th Cannes Film Festival while receiving the Palme d'Or award, and an award from my humble self for one of the best movies of 2022. Triangle of Sadness goes much deeper than saying: “EAT THE RICH!”. It is a sarcastic satire of elitism´s greed through a tripartite symbolic narrative structure, full of ridiculously genius editing and dialogues If you´re not already drooling all over this movie, then I don´t think we can be friends.

The narrative of Triangle of Sadness is divided into three parts: Carl & Yaya, The yacht, and The island. In the first part, Carl & Yaya, we are introduced to the two main characters who are both models, in a romantic relationship. Yaya is spoiled, fake, and theatrical, while also managing to be boringly predictable. While in Carl, I could feel a hint of intelligence and a sense of human decency, which makes it hard for him to navigate his own life in such an artificial environment as the world of fashion.

In the second part, The Yacht, the couple gets an invitation to join super-rich people on a cruise and promote it on their social media. During this part, we are introduced to many characters, the richer the more outrageously despicable; some of them exceeding humanity, becoming caricatures impersonating their social class. Triangle of Sadness is fabulously disgusting just like the people it tries to portray. During a dinner party, the yacht sails into a roaring storm, which leads most of the passengers to get horribly sick, and you can bet that the director didn´t spare us the details of their sickness. The scene is 18 minutes long and it´s so disturbingly poetic you just can´t take your eyes off of it. The passengers are vomiting and (I will say this politely) having involuntary bowel movements, while being thrown all around the boat as it crashes huge waves. The only calm ones are the captain, Thomas Smith, and Russian oligarch, Dimitry, who are both drunk and broadcasting their dialogue about capitalism and communism around the whole ship. Soon it turns purely into a monologue of the drunken captain that lasts all night. He is on his knees, saying stuff like “You´re rich so you´re a philanthropist, so you can clear your conscience for not paying enough in tax, not contributing enough to the society…”  in a preach-like tone, his omnipresent voice is carried throughout the ship letting them know that there are paying for their sins. I daresay, this might even be one of the best movie scenes ever. When the sun goes up, pirates attack the ship, while killing most of the passengers and crew.

Those who survive end up shipwrecked on an island, where the last part of the movie starts.  Carl, Yaya, and Dimitry survived with a few others. Abigail, who worked at the ship as a cleaning lady asserts authority due to her survival skills, creating a form of matriarchy, while also coercing Carl into a sexual relationship. Yaya and Abigail venture on a hike around the island because of the escalating tension just to find a lift near a luxury resort. Yaya thinks that they´re saved, but Abigail sneaks behind her with a furious facial expression and a huge rock in her hands, indicating she will kill Yaya. This cuts into the last scene, where Carl is running for his life through a jungle, while upbeat non-diegetic music is playing behind. And that is the end folks.

Gosh, this movie is so good, not only narrative-wise but the way it was carried out. The long takes are filled with immaculate dialogues (and that one unforgettable monologue), each different, but playing into the overall film´s narrative. The genius editing style that deepens the hilarious stupidity of the rich people, like in the scene where the ship´s manager gets asked by an old rich lady why the ship's sails are dirty, they should´ve been washed, but it´s a motor ship, thus it doesn´t have any sails, and the manager just stares in silence, and boom you have a cut as if to highlight that there truly is nothing more to add to that… Or the highly sarcastic usage of music, like death metal playing while the rich passengers are fighting for their lives on their toilets, classical music when they´re struggling to survive on the island, or the final brutally unsettling scene with upbeat sounds. Triangle of Sadness perfectly reflects the insanity of capitalism and consumerism from the beginning till the end.

Also, going a bit underneath the polished surface of the movie got me thinking if the symbolism of “triangle” goes much deeper than just being randomly chosen as the name from one of the first lines of the movie (when Carl is told by a modeling agent to relax his” triangle of sadness”, to look more available). The symbolism of the triangle and the number three cannot be accidental! It could be pointing to the Holy Trinity (the father, the son, and, in this case, the house of Balenciaga lol), the basic classes introduced in the Marxist theory (bourgeoisie, proletariat, petite bourgeoisie), the Buddhism concept of Trimurti (the creator, the preserver and the destroyer), the triads in philosophy (thesis, antithesis, and synthesis), and many more, of all which in comparison to the narrative all make sense… This paragraph is just a food for thought for you dear reader, since I have 13 minutes till the deadline of this review:).

“Can you relax your triangle of sadness? The space between your eyebrows… and open your mouth so you will look a bit more available… okay, not that much… a bit less… okay, thank you… NEXT!” Triangle of Sadness isn´t just a movie (it´s also the space between your eyebrows); it´s also a rollercoaster ride through the absurdity of our times, with a side of biting satire and a dollop of dark humor, served on a golden plate, just to be devoured by me in a blink of an eye! GO AND WATCH IT!

Random observational side question: why does Woody Harrelson always has unhinged characters with drinking problems?

[eldritchsurveys]

1194.

Did you exchange a walk-on part in the war for a lead role in a cage? by ausmuh

01. What would you say your favorite day in history is, or a day you find interesting? If you could, would you travel back in time to experience or witness it? >> I can't think of a specific date I find more interesting than others. Even if I could, I can safely say I would rather not fuck with the already-tenuous fabric of linear time like that.

02. What's the most embarrassing thing you've ever had an obsession with? Do you still like that thing? >> I'm not embarrassed by anything I've had an obsession with. They are all cherished parts of me.

03. Describe the last movie you watched, but do not give its title. The next person who takes this survey must try to guess the film that the previous survey-taker watched. You may give hints, such as the actors and actresses that starred in the film, the director, the year the film was made, etc. Then the guesser has to describe the last movie they watched, and so on and so forth. can't remember the last movie I watched, so I'll just use the last show I watched. it stars Jason Bateman, Michael Cera, Tony Hale, Will Arnett, Portia de Rossi in an early 2000s series about a highly dysfunctional family. >> ^ Arrested Development! Hell yeah, good show. Also this is a genius idea for a question. David Dastmalchian is a struggling TV show host who pulls out all the arcane stops for a pivotal sweeps-week Halloween episode. Nightmare scenarios ensue. 04. If you could draw any place that you could be magically transported into, what would you draw? What would you do there? .

05. Do you have the LiveJournal app downloaded onto your phone? >> I didn't even know LJ had an app. I certainly would not need it.

06. Have you ever played any of the Animal Crossing games? Do you have the new game, or do you plan on buying it? >> I've played New Leaf because Sparrow bought a copy of it when it came out. It isn't the kind of thing that holds my interest for long. Oh, and I've also played Pocket Camp (the phone version).

07. Do you talk to anyone from Xanga or LiveJournal on anything other than those two websites? If so, who do you talk to and through what? >> I do not. 08. Has anyone ever showed up at your doorstep unexpectedly (besides people selling things and Jehovah's Witnesses)? If so, who was the last person to do so, and why were they there? >> This doesn't happen to me. Thank fuck.

09. When was the last time you were nauseous? Do you know what caused the feeling of nausea? >> I don't recall. 10. Are you embarrassed when you make a grammatical error, whether it's in a paper for school, a survey, or a conversation? >> I don't make grammatical errors; if I use nonstandard grammar I'm doing it on purpose and it's not an error, it's just nonstandard. Even if I did make an error, I can't imagine being embarrassed about it. 11. Describe the last outfit you saw that you really liked, or if you want, post a picture. .

12. What was the last late night show you watched? Do you regularly watch these types of shows? Who is your favorite late night TV host? >> I don't watch late night TV, no.

13. What brand of earbuds / earphones do you own? Do you like them? >> My earbuds are Raycon and my headphones are Sony. I do like them, a lot. 14. Did you ever think you were going to get into a car crash? Did you or didn't you, and why did you think this? Were you the passenger or the driver? >> I've witnessed a couple of worrisome moments but I've never seriously thought a crash was imminent.

15. What is the most annoying thing your friend does? Do you ever call them out on it? .

16. Do you have a journal or diary that you write in on a daily or weekly basis? Did you used to keep one as a kid? >> I keep a daily journal in my Obsidian vault. I was very into journalling as a child, yeah.

17. For special occasions, do you make cards for others, or do you purchase them? >> I don't give cards.

18. Do you have difficulty swallowing pills? How often do you take them? >> I don't, but I've definitely met my share of challenging pills. Antibiotics were the fucking worst. As for the second question, I take a birth control pill nightly.

19. In your dreams, do you mostly see things through your own eyes, or do you see yourself through a third person view? >> I assume it's mostly the former.

20. Can you remember the last time you saw a rainbow? >> I cannot.

21. What month of this year has been the best for you so far? What was so nice or special about it? What about the worst month? >> I'm not sure. February was the worst, though. 22. Do you have a Vine account? Who are your favorite Vine users that you follow? >> I never had an account.

23. Have you ever tried poutine? (Have you ever even heard of it?) >> I haven't tried it yet.

24. Do you have any plants or flowers in your house? What kinds? Do you like having plants in your home? >> I don't know, there's a bunch. I personally have two in my room, an aloe and a spider plant. I do enjoy having greenery around. 25. What was the last e-mail you sent in regard to? .

[youcallyourselfafilmcritic]

This was easy to ignore when it was some dumb meme but press have reported on it enough for Cameron to respond so let's go over why James Cameron would not be a good choice for the Titan implosion

(let's ignore the fact that his friend was on the sub)

Two things made Cameron uniquely qualified to direct a Titanic movie. First off the sinking is dramatic and chaotic. Passengers freaking out, the scramble for minimal lifeboats, cold water sliding in and pushing debris and disrupting apparatuses on board, it breaking in half, those in the water futilely waiting for rescue while they freeze to death etc. Horrifying stuff but damn exciting viewing that utilises Cameron's distinctive strengths as a genre action director: escalating the stakes and tension with vast scenarios that are naturally occurring but hit you out of nowhere and keep you gripped

The climax of Titanic is up there with Terminator 2 or Aliens: it's the Poseidon Adventure on acid and Jim takes every advantage of this opportunity

The Titan imploded in seconds on the first day according to most experts (the Navy likely knew this on the first day). There's no real rising action or tension unless you want to just make shit up.

The second? Well Jim loved the Titanic long looooong before he ever put pen to paper on the script

Guy's not just a director with a pitch-he's an oceanographic explorer with deep, intimate knowledge of that ship. He's not fascinated with the sinking, he's fascinated by the Titanic. He's been down there 33 times-he's BUILT his own sub! Guy's obsessed.

*HE DIDN'T EVEN WRITE THE FUCKING SCRIPT BECAUSE HE WANTED TO HE CONVINCED HOLLYWOOD TO FUND AN EFFORT TO DIVE DOWN TO THE FUCKING BOAT BECAUSE HE WANTED TO EXPLORE IT*

The Titan was a minor annoyance for him until it got his friend killed. So like he's not gonna have that passion or keen interest and also has a billion and a half Avatar movies to make. If you genuinely want this movie and are not just memeing he ain't your guy.

But also in general it'd make a shit narrative film. You know why there's a love story in Titanic? Because otherwise it's a laborious wait for the iceberg to hit or you have it immediately and forego all tension building. You need something to keep the audiences invested so they decided a love story. Jack and Rose are-of course-fictional but that's alright as there were fucking THOUSANDS of people on that ship it's easy to slot them in. The people on the Titan likely died Day 1 and died immediately. It was an incredibly tightknit space with five people. Not much narrative potential here unless again you entirely break from the story.

(not the picture of those who died sans Stockton Rush but gives you an idea of the size two people are snug in there)

So the meat of the film is on building up or the aftermath. While the aftermath could have some potential that's not the story-and this is something at a glance it DOES have in common with the Titanic: the hubris and utter arrogance of the wealthy.

And this is where I say the lifeboats are short-sighted and the irony of it sinking on its maiden voyage (this wasn't The Titan's first trip) this is more an accepted truism of not only the elite fools who invested in it but the engineers and public: this ship was unsinkable. Everybody thought this.

Nearly the entirety of the deepsea diving community told OceanGate their submersible was heading for disaster.

Stockton Rush was not some prideful but short-sighted man blinded to the risks of his vessel thanks to like-minded peers. He was an arrogant, greedy fool who wanted to create a rich person's tourist trap one of the most famous graveyards in the world via the cheapest resources possible. His Randian-levels of self-righteousness made him fish food and led to the horrific death of a teenager. He fucked around and I doubt he took the nanosecond before his body was eviscerated to contemplate how he found out

And here's the final thing: this all probably works best as a documentary. A deep dive (sorry) into this company and their blowhardy foolish methods to goad rich idiots out of their money. The factors that led to this. But that isn't a narrative story even focusing on the hubris angle. Because there is plenty of hubris in the Titanic-oh is there a lot!-but there's also a romanticisim. Hence why romance stories work so well when adapting it.

The Titanic is a symbol of a bygone era-and a lot of this is rooted in classism but that last gasping sighs of Victorian-era innovation is something to be marveled at feeling like a culmination of the invention of the steam-powered train. It also examines this classism (which the 97 film explores-albeit briefly) in that there were third class passengers and most of them died. It reveals the beauty and elegance of the era but also the abuse and callousness of a time 2 years before World War 1 changed everything. It perfectly encapsulates the majesties and the tragedies of this late 19th/early 20th century culture which I think is why so many people are fascinated by it. Our world just isn't built like this anymore.

Not only were the passengers fucking billionaires (so the class angle at least on the vessel is gone) the hubris is easy to sum up. We know this guy is a jackass-there's nothing as interesting following his jackassahoonery before the sub explodes compared to exploring the societal culture of a time long gone depicted on the Titanic.

So this isn't even a it's too soon thing-the first movie about the Titanic was made 30 days after it sunk and with one of the survivors (this was back when movies were made in five minutes at the budget of a cup of coffee). A narrative feature on the Titan is a boring idea and far far below the skillset of the director who newspapers are now saying should make it all because it exploded visiting a famous ship he made a famous movie about

Also, again, he's a bit busy making a fuckton of Avatar sequels I guess one person wants. That person being James Cameron.

[illuminesce]

Ripley

There are times when you make mistakes and apologize.

Other times, you make mistakes and dig your heels in, despite you being entirely, blatantly wrong.

This is a story about one of those times.

My partner loves Metroid. Loves it. He has played all of the games.

I, however, attempted to play Metroid II when I was a kid on the Game Boy Color while in the passenger seat of a moving car. I was so frustrated by the game that I didn't realize I had motion sickness until my stomach forcibly expelled its contents onto me, the car seat, and the game.

That was the last time I played Metroid.

This means I have a vague, often incorrect memory of knowing what Metroid is about, and, in my attempts to support my partner, end up getting facts about Metroid wrong.

For instance, in Metroid Prime he was playing a part where Samus was followed by the pterodactyl alien monster and I said—

"Aw man, that Ripley is so scary."

"You mean Ridley?" he offered. This, I realized after the fact, was his way of allowing me a graceful out. I had gotten the name of the titular villain in Metroid wrong and he figured I was just misremembering.

Instead of admitting my mistake, I responded in hubris.

"No, it's...Ripley. It's definitely Ripley."

He squinted at me. "No, it's Ridley...like Ridley Scott, the director of Alien."

"No, Ripley is like...Sigourney Weaver's character in Alien, right?"

He stopped playing Metroid to open up a wiki. To which, I realized the following three things:

Its name is Ridley, not Ripley.

There's no way I could have "pulled a fast one" on a diehard Metroid fan with my limited knowledge (see: fifteen minutes in the car before vomiting) of the Metroid series

I have completely unearned confidence in my knowledge about Metroid AND in the movie Alien

Even after I learned these three things, I still kept saying, "but I could have sworn..." How did I get this knowledge that I felt so sure about? Why was I so convinced?

I have since openly admitted to my partner that I was wrong and he is the Most Knowledgeable Metroid Dude but from time to time he'll point at the screen when Ridley appears and go, "Look, it's your favorite character, Ripley!"

I admit, I still believe Ripley exists, around 20%. It's a feeling I can't shake. Maybe not in Metroid, but in some separate universe, there's a pterodactyl alien chasing the Famous Seamus Arran and she'll point her bean guns at it and say,

"I'm coming for you, Ripley!!!!"

[raitrolling]

The Craving

[Easy reading version on Toyhou.se]

Celise glanced out the train window, watching the scenery pass by. Ordinarily they would have been much more interested in watching the other passengers, examining their small habits, surreptitiously taking notes on their behaviour, trying to deduce what kind of person they must be by witnessing this tiny slice of their life.

But, it was hard to concentrate on the living when one so desperately craves consuming them.

The last time they left town to visit Tuuya they were accompanied by Vallis and his disturbingly-familiar pet, the cuspblood having trapped them against the window to prevent them from escaping and feasting on the irresistible meat bags that were aboard the carriage without trying to climb over him first.

Meat bags, they grimaced, they didn’t know if it was better or worse to de-personify what they hunger for the most. 

Without the cephalopod troll to distract them, they felt antsy, famished. They hadn’t wanted to see him again, but he did function as a decent roadblock when required. They drummed their fingers against their thighs as an attempted distraction, ears twitching at the sound of their slightly-sticky fingers hitting the papers on their lap. 

It was a copy of their latest screenplay, one they had emailed to their boss Aysnir for a review. As always, he loved it and thought it was brilliant. And as always, he wanted to meet with them in person to discuss it.

It was Celise’s usual psychological horror fare written into an approximately one hundred minute film, but for once they had incorporated something a lot more personal into it.

Something the zombie-loving indigoblood might actually approve of without edits.

Obskur Productions was a modest-sized studio, its movie budgets funded primarily through the owner’s seemingly-endless riches. Props were made in-house, and when Celise passed the workshop they spotted two of their co-workers constructing fake sci-fi technology by sticking hivehold objects to cardboard boxes and spraypainting them chrome. They were too engrossed in their work to notice the screenplay writer pass by, but Celise never cared to speak with their colleagues anyway.

They walked onto the only sound stage within the building, in which one of the sets was in the middle of being constructed. Befitting the props of the previous room, the scene around them was supposed to resemble a Fleetship interior, every square inch covered in futuristic chrome and blinding white lights. The brighter the stage, the more the special effects would stand out, the director had declared.

Celise remembered what this film was supposed to be. They wrote a scene about a spacefarer on a solo trip, but the ship loses power and they end up drifting aimlessly through space. The isolation would slowly drive the protagonist mad, oxygen levels and food rations would deplete over the course of the movie, and they would be convinced they were hearing something aboard the ship with them…

Aysnir wanted aliens. Giant insectoid aliens that crawl through the vents, with needle teeth and Xenomorph-style second jaws, and an ovipositor tail that’ll implant its eggs into unsuspecting trolls until they hatch and its young will explode out of their victim’s stomach.

It was such a stupid idea. The frog troll clenched their teeth, glaring straight ahead. This set design was meant to be clinical, sanitised, alien, familiar yet wholly unwelcoming and hostile. Not the stage for even more pointless blood splatters and weird bodily explosions.

While they were occupied by their own raging thoughts, they heard footsteps approach them - albeit dulled, thanks to how their senses had altered as a result of their undeath. What was more apparent to them was the smell, the expensive citrus and sandalwood cologne belonging to Aysnir Obskur could not hide that irresistible scent of healthy highblood flesh. 

“Hey, hey, hey, Celise! How’s my brilliant little writer going?” 

Celise was brought back to reality and tensed as the director approached them from behind, giving them a hearty slap on the back and a winning grin.

“It’s… It’s okay,” they murmured, quickly averting their eyes once their gazes met.

“I am loving the make-up, by the way, verrry spooky! Getting all geared up for Fright Night? Or wanting to become a double threat and get up on our stage?” the indigoblood laughed, and patted Celise’s cheek… Then made a small grimace and wiped his hand on his pants, feeling the slimy residue on their face.

Celise grumbled in response, which sounded vaguely like a croak. Their undead state seemed to have altered the vocal cords along all the other physical changes, making them much more froglike in nature. 

“You, um… You wanted to speak to me about my latest script?” They attempted to re-rail the conversation. 

“Yes! Of course! Come with me to my office, we have much to discuss!” Aysnir switched gears, patting the screenplay writer on the shoulder and then giving them a light push in the direction of his office.

Celise never liked how touchy he was. They bit their lip in annoyance, but obediently followed after.

The halls leading to Aysnir’s office were lined with posters of all his favourite movies: The Rainbowdrinker Beach Babes series, Zombie Apocalypse Gorefest 5000, Night of the Killer Zombie Boyfriends, Hurricane Piranha 8D, The Night Flesh-Eating Tapeworm Shifters Ate My Lusus… Celise remembered all their original screenplays for each film, before they were gutted, defiled, perverted. Stripped away of all nuance and artistic integrity, and turned into vapid and lowbrow schlock to suit the director’s own tastes.

‘He will always kill the heart of them and bring them back wrongly,’ Tuuya had told them.

They clutched their latest screenplay close to their chest. But what if this time…?  

Celise had seen the interior of Aysnir’s office so many times the eclectic mix of decorations hardly phased them anymore. Most of them were props from previous films, but there were also the very imposing mannequins wearing costume replicas of Freddy Krueger and Jason Voorhees positioned behind the director’s desk. On the centre of the wall was a signed photograph of Aysnir shaking hands with the director of Sharknado, apparently one of his proudest moments.

They politely sat down on the chair closest to them, and placed their screenplay neatly in front of them. Aysnir did not take his seat at his desk, instead opting to casually lean against it next to them. He always liked to pretend that formalities were below him, he was a cool boss.

Celise was the first to speak.

“So, um… What- What did you think…?” 

“Oh, it’s great! Brilliant as always!” Aysnir replied immediately, and seemingly without any thought. “You added a zombie in it without me needing to ask! Very enthusiastic, love it, love it a lot.”

Celise smiled a little. They knew it, their script about a freshly-turned zombie struggling with their new cravings is finally a hit with him. Quite possibly the sole good thing about their new condition is that it gave them the inspiration to pour all their feelings into a new movie, and ways people can understand their struggles without knowing exactly how real it is-

“Buuut…” The director smiled sheepishly, and looked apologetic at the cuspblood. But not in a way that’s genuinely apologetic, as the jovial tone easily betrayed any notion of empathy. He was clearly going through the motions to let them down gently.

As he always did. 

Celise stayed quiet, and prepared for the worst.

“It’s, well…” Aysnir waved his hand, “You’re doing the thing you always do, Celise. The horror part is always implied!”

He clears his throat, and picks up the screenplay on the desk and flicks through to the offending segment. It’s never a good sign when the director knows exactly where it is.

“‘A series of rapid cuts. Chisma’s bloodstained hands. A brief flash of the half-eaten corpse. An eyeball between teeth. An abstract spray of blood and the squelch of viscera. Scenes too quick for the audience to properly comprehend, but feel all the same.’ Like, this imagery is amazing - brilliant, even - but, the audience wants to see the gore and viscera! And no one likes confusing, dreamlike stories anymore, they want to be told exactly what’s happening on the screen so they don’t have to read an article about a confusing ending afterwards.”

The indigoblood shrugged, then flashed his usual blindingly bright grin. One that he thinks is reassuring, but instead feels patronising.

“So, whaddaya say we scrap all that scene, and then go real hard on the special effects to show the zombie eating his friend in as hi-res detail as possible? The audience? Will love it, it’ll make them squirm, make them scream, make them wanna recommend it to their friends as the most horrifying film they’ve ever watched!”

Celise bit their lip and clenched their fists in their lap. It- It’s still not good enough?

“But, that’s… I thought you would…” They look away, unsure how to convince their boss how to keep his hands off their script once more.

“Like it?” Aysnir completed their sentence, slightly incredulous. Then he laughs. “Of course I like it! Love it, even. You know how talented you are, and I am oh-so-lucky to have you! But we’re not just a movie production company, we’re a business. We gotta give the audience what they want, and I know what that is. We’re the perfect team! You come up with your brilliant little ideas-” He points at Celise, “and I make them marketable.” He points back at himself.

Of course. It’s about marketability. As if movies are a product, not an art. A means to get people in cinema seats paying full price tickets to see something mediocre, but the quality of the work doesn’t matter as long as the funds go back into Aysnir’s pockets.

It was sickening. Celise felt their stomach growl. 

“But, um, I don’t- I don’t want them to be marketable,” they said, softly, uncertain. 

Aysnir made a shocked face. “Huh? You don’t want to be a star? You don’t want trolls of all demographics flooding into theatres all over to witness your brilliant works?” 

“I, um- I do, but-”

“Fantastic! I always knew you were a go-getter!” The indigoblood pointed two fingerguns at Celise. “Buuut, that means we gotta ix-nay the ubtleties-say, y’know what I’m saying? Trust me, I want you to succeed, buddy. That’s why we have these meetings! To figure out how to put a bit of extra elbow grease in, and fine tune that baby until she purrs!”

Celise felt the bile rise in their throat. Saliva bubbled up in their mouth, and they had to stop themselves from growling. The more he talked, the more frustrated they felt. And that just made them hungry. 

‘Do not be Sisyphus, Celise,’ Tuuya’s warning popped into their mind once more, ‘He will always change things because he cannot appreciate them as they are.’ 

They shook their head, and stood up, looking Aysnir dead in the eye.

“No, you don’t understand. I- I don’t want to write something appealing, I want to write something I want. I want to write something special! If people don’t get it, then that’s- That’s their problem!”

Aysnir looked shocked at this outburst for a moment, but then laughed. He put both his hands on Celise’s shoulders.

“Celise, buddy, let’s stay cool, alright?” He grinned.

Celise did not calm down one bit, instead they just felt patronised. They chewed on their lip, and if blood were still pumping through their veins, they would certainly be feeling it start to boil.

“I get it, you want to write your snazzy little horror flick, but in this industry, niche doesn’t work. We’re not arthouse, none of our audience is here for things that make them want to think. I’ve been telling you this over and over again, but I guess you’re just a stubborn little frog, aren’t you?” His tone was light, as if he were speaking to a child, and he continued to pat their shoulders as he spoke. 

A low gravely croak rumbled through Celise’s throat. That feeling of hunger was becoming too much to bear. 

“No, you’re- You’re the one who isn’t listening!” They snapped.

Aysnir, true to how he always acted, was unfazed. In fact, he seemed to find it a bit amusing. 

“Woah, there! How about we take that tone down just a couple notches? I’m listening, I’m always listening, that’s why I always have so many ideas about how to make your ideas better! So, how about we take a breather, relax for a few minutes, and then we’ll hit rewind and go back to the talk about making the zombie scarier?” He took his hands off Celise so he could twirl a finger in a circular motion, gesturing for them to circle back to their previous discussion - or imply that he thinks they’re losing their marbles.

‘He can never bend or break, he can only be tossed aside.’

Celise couldn’t take it any more. Their breaths were heavy and ragged with rage, saliva was pouring out of their mouth, their stomach and jaws screamed at them for some release from this hunger.

Aysnir had noticed this shift in their behaviour, and finally stopped talking, realising that his screenplay writer’s outburst was not funny in the slightest. In fact, he seemed quite afraid of them.

But it was too late. Before their mind could keep up with their movements, they attacked in a starved daze.

The first thing they remember in that moment was their hands grabbing his neck, squeezing tighter and tighter, and their tongue wrapping around his face to muffle any screams, and before he could react the sound of a snap- 

The second thing they remember was a flurry of indigo staining their hands and mouth, the overwhelming smell of fresh meat, a half-chewed mass of flesh in a shredded polo shirt, something no longer beating in their hand, and the squish of an eyeball between their teeth.

[firsttarotreader]

Hi, I’m surprised Pedro wasn’t in Cannes, apparently due to a conflict with Gladiator 2. Is he disappointed he couldn’t go? Is he happy with the way SWOL turned out? Curious about what the cards say…

Hello! I asked these two questions to the cards and we’ll see what came up! The first question was whether he was upset he couldn’t go. The Major Arcana were The Hanged Man, The Fool reversed and The Empress.

Okay, so The Hanged Man means he was “suspended”, and it could be pointing to him having to “commit” to something, to “deep dive”, or that he was just a passenger and didn’t have that much of a choice, he had to wait and see how it would go. The Fool reversed points to him having this lack of energy in some way. He could have been, in this context, in need to think if jumping in this “adventure” was the best option for him and he wasn’t really “available” to it, he didn’t have enough energy to go. And why? The Empress could be the answer in a way, since she represents him “working” on something, to birth something. This card is about action and turning plans into reality, making something happen, so it could definitely be pointing to him working on something and not having enough energy to go. This might even be referring to the heavy prep he could be doing for his new role.

The Minor Arcana were the Queen of Swords, 6 of Wands and 6 of Pentacles. Queen of Swords with The Hanged Man points to him being really rational about this decision. It wasn’t emotional, it wasn’t something he did “just because”. All the “suspension” and the way he had to commit to something else was a carefully considered decision and not reckless. The 6 of Wands with The Fool reversed is interesting because it could point to two things, one being him lacking energy and motivation BECAUSE he has to work for something to go PERFECTLY well, to make something work perfectly, and the other being the fact that he knows that despite his absence, it would be a huge success and everything would go well. He knew he would be proud of it (and of them). And the 6 of Pentacles with The Empress makes it even more clear, Pedro has SOMETHING going on, something he’s doing, that he needs to give all of himself to it, he needs to give what he’s got to this thing he’s doing.

So honestly, I think he’s seeing it from a rational pov and had to make a rational decision, he really is doing something and needed to dedicate himself to it.

Then, I asked if he is satisfied with the final result of SWOL (he probably hasn’t seen the real final result, but taking in consideration what he has seen and what he has done with it). The Major Arcana were The Chariot, Justice and The Magician reversed.

Well, The Chariot shows us he thinks it went in the right direction, it was great, he went with it and it was a very compelling story and it all went smoothly and well. Justice means he thinks it was perfectly balanced and fair and correctly done. The Magician reversed, however, makes me think he could feel like it was cut short in a way, like they had the elements and the potential to do more, to explore more, to do more with the story and the characters. Maybe he thinks a feature length movie would be even more perfect.

The Minor Arcana were the Knight of Swords, 9 of Cups and 5 of Pentacles. Knight of Swords with The Chariot means Pedro was ready for the challenge of working with Almodóvar (it was his dream director) and he approached this work very rationally and professionally and did his best to be the best he could to Almodóvar. He was a Knight in this job and it worked amazingly. 9 of Cups paired with Justice points to Pedro being happy, satisfied with how fairly it was done, with its balance. He feels joyful and lucky for doing it, like a dream came true. And 5 of Pentacles with The Magician reversed makes me even more convinced he just feels like the movie could be a feature length one. He could feel like they lost something, like they could have more but didn’t.

So I would say he’s probably very satisfied with it, only possibly thinking they had material for a longer movie because they had more to do with the story and the characters.

[tilbageidanmark]

Movies I watched this Week #121 (Year 3/Week 17):

This week I watched more “Foreign” films (19) and more films by female directors (15) than usual. The best ones were: Lynne Ramsay's 'Gasman' and 'Ratcatcher', 'All night long', and 'Summer 1993'.

🍿  

Carmen Jones squarely belongs to the beautiful Dorothy Dandridge, for which she was nominated for Best Actress Oscar, first for an African-American. Harry Belafonte played the sap who falls for her, is betrayed by her and who finally kills her in a jealous rage. The song numbers were all done in single shots, and the opening title sequence was the first one created by Saul Bass.

RIP, Harry Belafonte.

“About my own life, I have no complaints. Yet the problems faced by most Americans of color seem as dire and entrenched as they were half a century ago.”

🍿  

Scottish Auteur Lynne Ramsay X 7:

She only made 4 feature films and before this week I’ve only seen her most recent one, the dark and ‘Taxi Driver’-violent ‘You were never really there’, which did not speak to me. But because I keep reading that she’s one of the most important female directors of our time, I wanted to check out the rest of her work.

🍿 Morvern Callar, her second feature, took a while to get me. Driftless, precarious supermarket worker Samantha Morton seemed to have no center. One Christmas morning she finds that her boyfriend had killed himself on their kitchen floor, and like Meursault in ‘The Stranger’ by Camus, she’s overwhelmed by her inability to process her emotions. But he left her a manuscript of a novel, and she replaces his name with hers and sends it to a publisher mentioned in his suicide note. Another modern classic it resembles is Antonioni’s ‘The Passenger': As she reinvents herself with his persona, she travels from her small Scottish town south to Andalusia, and eventually finds herself in the middle of nowhere, on a dusty mountain road without any plans, or idea what to do. By the ‘Dedicated to the One I Love’ ending, it all falls into place.

🍿 Her early, 15-minute masterpiece Gasman became an immediate favorite. A poetic gem without a single unnecessary frame or word. An 8-year-old goes to a Christmas party at the local inn with her dad and brother, and on the way they meet a woman who leaves 2 other children with the dad. The way the story discloses that the girls are half-sisters is silently and unbearably heartbreaking - 10/10!

🍿 “The very thought of you”...

Things left untold in the haunting short Swimmer, pure cinematic poetry in motion, all exquisite allusions without any explanations. 8/10

🍿 All her early shorts won prestigious awards and established her as a superb visual filmmaker. Small deaths was her film school graduation short. It captures a young girl’s pain. 

🍿 But only when watching her poetic debut feature Ratcatcher, that I understood why Lynne Ramsay is considered to be one of world cinema’s best visionaries. Not knowing anything in advance about it, I was not prepared for its visual gut punch. Beauty and misery among “the garbage and the flowers”. The non-redeemable, poor children of the working class neighborhood in 1973 Glasgow. Mesmerizing pain, transformative guilt, transcendental grace - one of the best well-made movies I ‘ever’ saw!

🍿 I was reluctant to finish with the depressing We Need to Talk About Kevin, since I’m not big on dramas with Omen-like psychopath children, school shooting tragedies and damaged, long-suffering mothers. Throughout the movie, mom Tilda Swinton is washing blood out, trying to atone. Disturbing and not a pleasure trip for sure.

🍿 All her films are about parental abandonment and existential sadness. Now that I’ve seen them all, I can understand her appeal. So meanwhile, here’s Tony Zhou, of ‘Every Frame a Picture’, talking about The Poetry of Details of Lynne Ramsay (From 2015).

And I can’t wait for her next feature “I feel fine”.

🍿

Ang Lee’s 2nd feature, The Wedding Banquet, part of his early “Father Knows Best” trilogy. Surprisingly, it’s another unapologetic mainstream story about a gay couple, done more than a decade before his ‘Brokeback Mountain’. It tells of a young Taiwanese immigrant in Manhattan, whose parents want him to marry a nice Chinese woman, not knowing that he's been living with his boyfriend [Roy Lichtenstein’s real son] for the last 5 years. Like Peter Weir’s Green Card, he agrees to fake-marry a nice woman who needs a green card, but his parents come and throw him a huge party. It gets a bit implausible.

🍿

2 surprising Othello adaptations:

🍿 My second intelligent enigma by forgotten British director Basil Dearden! A week ago I discovered his seminal gay blackmail Noir ‘Victim’ about closeted barrister Dirk Bogards, and I promised myself to look for other works by him. His very next All Night Long did not disappoint.

It re-creates Shakespeare's ‘Othello’ in a 1962 Swinging London jazz jam. Patrick McGoohan is drummer Johnny, a scheming, pot-smoking Iago who prowls the party stirring up jealousy and fear to tear the interracial couple of regal bandleader Aurelius Rex and his wife Delia apart, so that Delia will sing with Johnny when he leaves Othello's band.

It’s a superbly tense tragedy that takes place in one location and in the course of one evening, It mixes a thriller with authentic jazz performances and score, and it casually presents Race (2 mixed race couples are treated in matter-of-fact way) as well as marijuana usage which is part of the plot, but used without any comment.

With young Richard Attenborough and several prominent Jazz musicians including Dave Brubeck and Charles Mingus. There’s also the majestic performance of black lead actor Paul Harris as ‘The Moor”: Magnetic and unforgettable!

The trailer. 9/10!

🍿 Desdemona, one of the earliest screen adaptations of Othello, a silent film from 1911. It was directed by August Blom, a pioneer of Danish ‘golden age’ of erotic melodramas. Hard to figure out what’s happening, but what great hats the dames wore.

🍿  

My first by Danish director Martin Zandvliet, A funny man (”Dirch”). It’s a traditional bio-pic about legendary local comedian and actor Dirch Passer. I loved the way it depicted theatrical life in Copenhagen of the 50′s and 60′s. With good performances by current stars of the Danish screen, Nikolaj Lie Kaas, Lars Ranthe and Lars Brygmann. A solid, personal 8/10.

🍿  

The 2 award-winning Catalan dramas made by Carla Simón:

🍿 Alcarràs, a Spanish drama about a family of Catalan farmers, whose peach orchard which they had tended for 2 generations is sold from under them to be uprooted and used as a solar farm. Played convincingly by non-actors, especially the little girl Iris was pitch-perfect. Some scenes (like the family singing) were superb. 7/10. (Photo Above)

🍿 Her debut feature Summer 1993, was a heartbreaking story about a 6-year-old orphan who has to live with her uncle’s family in the country, after both her parents had died of AIDS. It’s a tender and intimate description of small gestures and inner turmoil. Tremendous “acting” by two little girls, the main subject, as well as her new 3-year-old step-sister.

100% ‘Fresh” on Rotten Tomatoes from 97 reviews. This film is also auto-biographical, as Simón’s real parents also died from AIDS when she was 6, and she had to live with her uncle's family in Catalonia. 9/10.

🍿 

Fat, Bald, Short Man, my second Colombian film (after the masterful ‘Embrace of the serpent’). A singular animation feature, using minimalist, nearly abstract, rotoscoping. A story of an invisible middle-age salaryman, Antonio Farfán, who is hampered by his ordinary looks and low self-esteem. 5/10.

🍿  

2 more by Sarah Polley:

🍿 Her debut feature, Away from her. Adapted from the Alice Munro short story, another difficult topic: Julie Christie suffers from Alzheimer's and must be put away in a home. There’s no surprise here, and it goes only in one direction.  

🍿 Take this Waltz, a standard Ménage à trois romantic comedy whereby Michelle Williams is happily married to chicken cookbook author Seth Rogen, but falls in love with the rickshaw driver / hipster-artist across the street. It’s hard to take husband Seth Rogen seriously, and even the Leonard Cohen montage doesn’t elevate the story to more than what it is.

Now that I’ve seen all four of Sarah Polley films, her documentary ‘Stories we tell” is the only memorable one, in my eyes.

🍿  

“The gorillas beat him to death before the zookeepers could gas them all...”

“Frag Waving” Team America: World Police, one of the few action movies I can stand, a vulgar satire of Bush’s militaristic war on the “Terrorists”, and a parody of cliches for everything from Hollywood to politics to American values. The version I saw did not have the complete X-rated puppet sex scene I remember from before, but oh well. Still 7/10.

Also: “You are worthress, Arec Barrwin!”

🍿

2 by french director Rebecca Zlotowski:

🍿 Grand Central, my 14th infatuated film with Léa Seydoux (who seems to have a permanent clause in all her contracts that she must have at least 2 crying scenes in each - not that I mind). She starts a lukewarm romance with some block, an unskilled laborer with no personality, while living with the guy’s supervisor in a trailer next door. At the same time, they all work at a French nuclear plant, as manual sub-contractors, without having any qualifications, and get exposed to dangerous radiations all the time. Two arbitrary and unconvincing plots that fell flat. 3/10.

🍿 Zlotowski’s latest drama Other People's Children was better, because it had a more ‘normal’, adult story. A childless 40-year-old woman falls in love with a divorced man who has a four-year-old-daughter, and tries, unsuccessfully to fit in their lives. 5/10.

🍿 

I was the biggest Beatles fan there was in the 60′s, but I never saw the reconstructed, cheesy Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band with Peter Frampston (?) and the Bee-gees before. Embarrassing and Disneyland-style kitschy, it made me ashamed to be alive during the excessive 70′s. Many atrocities involved (George Burns ‘Fixin’ a hole’, Donald Pleasence as a pimp, Steve Martin in Maxwell Silver Hammer, Aerosmith ‘Come Together’, nearly every other “parody” song), with zero redeeming qualities. 1/10.

🍿  

Cracks, the only film directed by Jordan Scott, Ridley Scott's daughter. The genre of British period films about Boarding School for Girls is not my strong cup of tea, and neither is this one. A lesbian love triangle and sexual jealousy between a teacher and her two students on the diving team ended up clichéd. With young Juno Temple and neurotic Eva Green. 2/10.

🍿  

Re-watch: Play it again, Sam, an early and typical Woody Allen comedy, written by him, starred by him (together with past and future girlfriends), but directed by Herbert Ross. 50 years later, it’s dated and unfunny. 2/10.

Should I now re-watch ‘True Romance’, my favorite Tarantino film, in which he based Val Kilmer’s Elvis on the Bogard character from here?

🍿   

There were already 70 Covid-19 films, according to Wikipedia. Of the ones I saw, ‘Bo Burnham: Inside’ and ‘Locked Down' were my favorites.

But the new Life upside down is not. I only watched it because it was directed by a woman, and starred Bob Odenkirk. But these 5-6 shallow LA-characters were tiring and uninteresting. The only innovating aspect of this boring film was disclosed during the end credits: The fact that it was shot remotely over Zoom. 2/10.

🍿  

(My complete movie list is here)

[adamwatchesmovies]

I Still See You (2018)

Released in theaters on October 12, 2018, I Still See You came and went without making an impression. With the teenage protagonists in the middle of a post-catastrophe world, you’ll wonder why at first. The Darkest Minds, The 5th Wave and Divergent all fizzled without their stories concluding but some people were clamouring for them. Could this be a YA-novel adaptation so bad it couldn't even find an audience among 13-year-olds?

In 2010, an explosion at Ashburn Laboratories creates a shockwave that kills hundreds. The deceased come back as non-sentient “remnants” (ghosts) who repeat some of their final moments every day. Ten years later, high school student Veronica ‘Ronnie’ Calder (Bella Thorne) is startled by a new (sexy) ghost (played by Thomas Elms) in her bathroom. Impossibly, this remnant writes “Run” in the steamed mirror before vanishing. Her favourite teacher, Mr. Bittner (Dermot Mulroney), doesn’t believe her but quiet loner Kirk Lane (Richard Harmon) does. Together, they follow the remnant's trail and discover it may be trying to attack her from the grave.

What we’ve got here is one of the most convoluted vehicles for a mystery I’ve ever seen. Let's begin with this world. Everyone drives slowly, not knowing if the old lady crossing the street is actually a human being, or the memory of one. Inside Ronnie’s home, there are always three chairs at the dinner table so her deceased father can appear unimpeded in the morning. I’m certain there are many awkward trips to the washroom where someone with a full bladder opens the door to find a phantom sitting on the toilet. Half of a couple in the middle of having sex is floating in a hotel bedroom. Passengers who died on a flight are zipping through the air high above us, etc. I know we're not supposed to think about that but you can't help it. You expect the film to be about Ronnie and Lane discovering a conspiracy behind the remnants or that perhaps since “Brian” wants to harm her, that all remnants are about to turn on humanity unless the explosion's cause is discovered. You’re way, way off. The remnants are not integral to the story except to explain how Ronnie saw that first ghost, and why she begins a quest for answers.

At 98 minutes, this is a short film, and a significant chunk is spent on information that's ultimately useless. In fact, the role remnants ultimately play in the story proves this never should've been a movie. I can't emphasize how superfluous the ghost thing is in the end but you get stuck on that angle. It's all you care about. We know the remnants are not - as previously stated - forced to simply relive their last moments in the same place as they lived them. Obviously, “Brian” and his sumptuous behind didn’t die in his underwear in Ronnie’s bathroom 10 years ago. This means remants can be anywhere, at any time. They can also be animals and from a time period which precedes the explosion. What the rules are, you don't know - but you want to. Makes you wonder what happens when two of them collide.

What this movie is REALLY about is the mystery. Too bad it's nonsense. It’s impossible for you to figure out what really happened to Brian and how Ronnie ties to him. Once you learn the truth, it’ll leave your head spinning. Hopefully, fast enough for you to stop asking questions - or so director Scott Speer hopes. There are so many seemingly random aspects to the enigma that is Brian. February 29th is an important date, and a crucial clue to what’s happening. Why an explosion-created ghost would care about leap years, I don’t know. It gets crazier as bodies pile up and time starts to run out. You wonder how all of these clues and characters we’ve been introduced to will fit together. Got a theory? I can tell you without hearing it; you're wrong.

I Still See You is ridiculous. Its story derails itself. The film feels like it was re-written to contain a supernatural element. When the ghost thing didn’t sell, they altered the recipe again to draw in fans of the post-apocalyptic YA genre. In the end, there are more misshapen ideas than fully realized ones. It’s so utterly bewildering I think you can have a lot of fun with it as long as you know it’s a bad movie ahead of time. (June 28, 2019)

[dominustempori]

Not every day an actor you admire gets you to watch one of their movies...

Long post, you've been duly warned.

So if you've seen my more recent blogs, I've been obsessing (a bit, healthily, I assure you) over a certain adventure game series. And from there, I'm doing like I usually do when I want to know more about an actor I REALLY like. Finding other stuff they've done, checking out what social media they use here and there, non-profits they support and promote and what have you...

Enter Alexandra Boyd. Actor, writer, director...inspiration.

Podcasts? Check. Her own personal site? Check. Clips from past British shows she had minor AND major roles in? Check.

Finding out her latest film is a documentary about some of the "core extras," including herself, that were in 1997's 'Titanic?' And the trailer for it looks REALLY good?...didn't see that coming.

Truth: until, like, literally now, I NEVER SAW TITANIC.

I was probably the ONLY teenager in AMERICA that had no desire to go watch it, or had a crush on Leo DiCaprio for that matter.

But...granted, I remembered that other actors I've come to REALLY like over time since I was in high school, they were in the movie: Victor Garber, Bernard Hill, Ioan Gruffud, David Warner...you get the idea. I think I prefer Kate Winslet's performance in "Sense and Sensibility" to her Rose but, eh, I'm a little biased.

And, well there's good reasons why 'Titanic' got so many Academy Awards that year...but I'll be real: I was pretty damn excited when "Return of the King" got all of ITS Oscars for 2003.

Anyway.

Few days ago, I took a chance, hoping I didn't come off as too-much-of-an-awkward fangirl, and shot Alexandra a shoutout on Messenger, saying how amazing it was that she came back for her role as Elaine in Return to Monkey Island. And, kind of offhandedly, mentioned how cool the "Ship of Dreams" (her documentary that's releasing soon) looked, and...how I never saw Titanic but now was kind of inspired to after how many years.

She kindly responded to my message (yay!) and highly recommended to watch "Titanic" at the very least to obtain more of and appreciation for 'Ship of Dreams' when it comes out (I've no idea if it'll be in theaters where I live, but then again, I'm going to ask an acquaintance of mine, who just happens to be the director of a local historical theatre with a small modern cinema next to it, if they could possibly get hold of it. Small city living yo.)

Overall...I liked it. I definitely need to watch it again. Full on experience should be more than my library's letterboxed basic edition on my laptop.

Some scenes and lines...I was all "Oh yeah, right. Uh-huh." Dramatic license sort of getting in the way. Strongest dialogue...maybe not so much? Little cornball in places? Mm, well, putting on the romantic plot in an ultimate disaster movie...kind of lends itself to that sort of thing.

But didn't I LOVE to hate (well, strongly dislike) Billy Zane and David Warner's characters. Which of course is the idea. And I was internally cheering on Kate and Leo pretty much the whole way through. Kathy Bates was probably the best of all the first class passengers that got focused on.

Held my breath and tensed up and...closed my eyes for many of the stunt/action shots once the ship hit the iceberg. That music score realllly helped with that. Once it got to that certain high angle and you got more of the screaming...yeah, that broke me. Knew it was coming but still...hit me right in the feels. And didn't Victor look SO SAD when he realized the truth that his ship's design turned out to be SO flawed. Oh he plays that so well.

BUT I didn't get teary until good old (then unknown) Ioan "My Man Hornblower" Gruffud turned his lifeboat around and desperately called out if anyone in the water was still alive.

Yeah, I liked it. More than I thought I would. Surprised me quite a bit, which is usually a good thing. Need to find me more behind-the-scenes stuff. I'm intrigued, and that's always a good sign that I enjoyed a film.

So TL, DR: Alexandra Boyd basically got me to watch 'Titanic.' How cool is that? Thanks, Alexandra, and cheers!