#its my therapy fr
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okay so i saw something on my fyp on tik tok and it really just... irked me so i want to talk about it here
basically it was about an episode in the vampire diaries where elena compells (mind controls him for any non tvd fans) her brother to leave town so he can escape the dangerous world of supernatural and her best friend bonnie thinks its wrong.
anyway they have this whole fight abt why elena did it and how bonnie didn't think she should have and this is what they says for context:
Bonnie: i just feel it's really wrong that you compelled jeremy (elenas brother) to leave town
Elena: i'm doing it to protect him. i want to give him a chance at a happily normal life
Bonnie: he should be able to choose how he wants to live it, you're taking his choices away
Elena: bonnie you can't tell him
um so i felt all yucky after that and the caption was 'do you agree with bonnie?' so i checked the comments and... majority of them sided with elena.
i just can't understand it. it physically makes me ill thinking about it because how can you agree with someone when they take your choices away? it's your life, you should be able to choose what to do with it.
anyway i was just shocked that so many people believed elena was in the right and now i can't get it out of my head so yeah here i am talking about it bc idk what else to do
:)
#tik tok#tumblr#alice rants#ranting is so fun#its my therapy fr#tvd#the vampire diaries#my life my choice#free will#freedom#fyp#elena gilbert#bonnie bennet#jeremy gilbert
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☆ even the gods bleed [ pt 2 ]
{☆} characters furina, neuvillette {☆} notes cult au, imposter au, multi-chapter, gender neutral reader {☆} warnings none {☆} word count 1.9k {☆} previous [ 1 ]
This had to be a punishment of some sort – some kind of divine punishment.
She was bored out of her mind just watching the sleeping body – she hadn't blinked once in the past five hours, her eyes were really starting to hurt. Yet they still hadn't moved so much as an inch since she sequestered them away to the only place she had known to be safe.
But it'd been almost a week since then.
The only solace she found was that Teyvat had seemed much less hellbent on collapsing in on itself like a dying star.
That counted for something.
Not much, but something!
..Even if their position was no better then it was a week ago.
There was, after all, still the issue of what to do about the false Creator – the actual imposter – and the Archons following them like blind lambs. The other Archons wouldn't listen if she tried to reason with them, and it would only risk the life of Divine One if she spoke of their location to anyone else.
She also was pretty fond of having her head still attached to her shoulders.
So she avoided them all together. Partially because she wasn't sure she wouldn't have a breakdown at the sight of them..she'd never been a fighter, and fighting an Archon? Easy pass.
Instead she was forced to babysit the sleeping Divine until they woke up while Neuvillette handled taking care of the nation and dealing with the other Archons – and by extension the false Creator.
Really though, she would almost think them dead if not for the subtle rise and fall of their chest.
Though..this also left her with a lot of time to herself. A lot of time to think.
She really didn't like it.
There wasn't a lot to occupy her mind and what little there was only distracted her for a scant few moments before her eyes drifted back to the Divine like she was locked in their orbit, unable to escape.
She closed the same book for the twelfth time – she kept count – and returned it to it's meticulously designed place within her bookcase. A low, barely audible huff of frustration escaped her lips before she could bite it down, her stare boring a hole into the body of the Divine One with a sharp intensity she rarely showed.
She was tired, bored and constantly on edge, fearing that at any moment someone would find out about their presence here.
That, at the drop of a hat, she would be powerless to stop the greatest tragedy of her time play out before her eyes.
Neuvillette would have scolded her for being so petulant, especially around the Divine One, if he were here.
But he wasn't.
He was out running her nation, instead.
And what was she doing? Nothing!
She grit her teeth, nails digging harshly into the palm of her hands as she took a deep breath – now was not the time to think about that. She had..much more pressing matters. Sulking and letting her thoughts spiral helped no one, least of all herself.
Yet her attention was caught by a harsh inhale, the rustle of fabric – were they finally waking up? She was exhausted, but it all vanished at the sudden drop of life within the otherwise deathly still body of the Divine.
Her eyes followed the subtle twitch of their fingers, watching as their brow furrowed and their features twisted in something almost like..pain.
..She wasn't ready.
What was she supposed to say?
Should she even say anything? Would that be considered impolite? Does she wait for them to speak first? Should she kneel? Bow?
She doesn't get much time to find her own answer before their lashes flutter, chest heaving with every strangled breath. Every single thought vanishes from her mind the moment she meets their eyes.
For a long, silent moment she thinks that her heart must have stopped.
Their eyes glow like the cresting of the sun over the horizon, painting the world in hues of gold – yet it also reminded her of the dipping of the moon below the waves, casting the briefest, most gentle of lights upon the world engulfed in darkness. In the depths of their eyes was the birth and death of stars in the infinite cosmos – glittering stars in a sea of empty, blank space that left her feeling lightheaded and breathless.
Beneath the splendor is a spark of recognition in their eyes so vibrant it was like a shooting star piercing through the dark night sky, leaving nothing but the wonder in the eyes of the observer as the only proof it ever existed – brilliant in it's beauty, however brief.
It is the most beautiful thing she has ever seen.
"Focalors?"
The lilt of their voice nearly made her knees buckle beneath her – euphoria so consuming it left her feeling she was starving swallowed her whole, her mind blanking in a moment of utter bliss. It was..an indescribable feeling that she doubted she could ever hope to put into words – not in a way that could properly express it, try as she might.
She swallowed the words that threatened to spill from her lips – she couldn't make a fool of herself. Not in front of them of all people. She'd never forgive herself.
"Divine One," She rasps, clearing her throat and covering her mouth with a hand to mask both her nervousness and the small smile that creeps across her face. She quickly regains her composure, hand resting on her hip as she puffs out her chest with every bit of pride she can manage. "I am sure you must be confused, but worry not– your most loyal acolyte has seen the truth!"
The silence is deafening.
She opens one eye, peaking at the bewildered and almost distraught expression of the Divine.
"What the hell are you talking about?"
That..she was not prepared for. Surely they knew who they were! Surely they knew. They had to– she's been praying to them for as long as she's breathed, she's dedicated every hour of her life to living up to their ideals, they can't just–!
"Lady Furina?"
Neuvillette, thankfully, spares her the embarrassment of having a meltdown in front of the Divine, the gentle rap of his knuckles against the door making her and the Divine pause, the soft lull of his voice soothing her nerves and yet setting her on edge at the same time.
"Neuvillette." She clears her throat again, her steps hurried as she marches to the door and pries it open none too gently, a forced smile pulling at her lips. She wastes no time tugging the man into the room, shutting the door behind him with a short huff. The silence is, somehow, even worse then before as the three of them stare at each other in absolute exasperation.
Neuvillette, for his part, manages to get his act together with a sharp clearing of his throat, bowing so low even she looks unnerved. She steals a brief glance at the Divine, and she's taken aback by the uncomfortability twisting their features into a grimace.
Their expression is schooled back into one of empty apathy when he stands back to his full height, but she saw it – she knows she did! Did they not like their worship? Were they not respectful enough? For a moment, she feared the Divine would smite Neuvillette down on the spot..but they just stared at him like he was a ghost.
"Why aren't you killing me?"
The defeated, resigned tone combined with the way their voice cracks makes her heart ache in her chest – it feels as though her entire world is crumbling down at her feet, and she cannot explain why she feels such emotions so strongly, but it is suffocating. It is almost as if Teyvat itself is weeping, bearing down upon her shoulders like a heavy weight.
She feels the urge to weep herself, but she powers through, gritting her teeth long enough for Neuvillette to take his place at the side of her – though it feels more like their – bed, kneeling like he was going to pray.
"Divine One," He offers a hand with a quiet rumble of his voice, the words slipping off his tongue like honey. It's like trying to soothe a stray cat..though she'd never voice such comparisons of the most Divine out loud. "I..we mean you no harm. I swear on my authority as the Iudex of Fontaine and Chief Justice that you are safe with us."
The skepticism she expected, but the reverence in which Neuvillette must convince them – or perhaps they are simply so tired that they simply did not care any longer if it was all some ploy to drive a knife between their ribs. She didn't expect them to actually place their hand in Neuvillette's.
He didn't either, judging by the way he visibly brightened – not that they'd notice, but she did.
..Not that she could really blame him, her heels clicking against the floorboards as she shifted her weight to the other foot with a nervous energy that was practically bursting at the seams, more then a little jealous of the attention he was receiving. She was the one who found them, she was the one who stayed with them the entire time..but he gets all the attention?
How unfair.
"O-of course! We would never lay a hand on our creator," She adds, her voice a little higher pitched then she would have liked as she placed her hands on her hips, puffing out her chest and brushing off the sting of jealousy. "Least of all I– your most loyal, most devout acolyte!"
She felt baffled when she heard the sound of their laughter, her shoulders hunching and her cheeks flushing on mere instinct – she was expecting mockery, but the look in their eyes, still dulled by a pain she cannot even begin to imagine, made her hesitate.
..It was, perhaps, the most genuine thing she'd heard from them ever since before the hunt began.
She wasn't sure why her heart hurt at such an idea, but it was enthralling to see the beginnings of a half hearted smile on their lips.
For a moment, her mask of theatrics was forgotten as she stared at them in a mixture of awe and adoration– and though she didn't look at Neuvillette, she could imagine he must've shared such an expression.
Had she any doubts that they were her Creator, that they alone were the most Divine..they would wiped clean now. There was no mistaking the way the world itself seemed to grow clearer as they glanced up at her like she was worth something.
For a moment, she realized how cold the false Creators gaze had been now that she has felt warmth so gentle it almost made her knees buckle beneath her. It felt like a pale imitation, now.
Nothing could compare to the warmth that spread through her body at the mere semblance of a smile upon their lips. She didn't even mind if it was her they were laughing at anymore, she just wanted to hear them laugh again.
She'd make a fool of herself, if she had to.
She'd never felt so..ravenous for such a thing, but just the briefest glimpse was addictive.
She simply couldn't help herself from striding across the room and clasping their free hand in her own, her smile wide enough to unnerve as she leaned her weight onto the bed. For a moment, she considered pulling away at the way they startled, but her mind was made up by then – there was no going back.
"Again."
#sagau#genshin sagau#self aware genshin#genshin impact sagau#self aware genshin impact#fic tag#neuvillette#focalors#furina#dont ask what happened here idk#this was. also supposed 2 be neuvi focused and then i.#dont talk 2 me abt focalors i wont ever shut up#got a 300k word essay on hand abt how i feel abt her character/how i interpret her personality and her story#focalors jsut like me fr fr (cries at the slightest inconvenience or the slightest mean comment)#shes so pathetic girlfail im gonna chew on her#what happens when reader gets stuck with two emotionally repressed french bastards?? hell#neuvi is the “emotionless” flavor of emotionally repressed in that hes HORRIBLE at showing emotions at all#ask him to smile and its incredibly unnerving and theres too many teeth but hes trying his best please call him pretty or he will cry :(#furina is the flavor of emotionally repressed where she makes it up by having Too Many emotions#using theatrics and masks to show everyone what they want to see but inside this girl is a MESS#constant anxiety and panic 24/7#will do random shit and look at you and if u dont compliment her she will think u hate her and cry#compliment her and she'll do even stupider shit to try and impress you more#i love my scrunkly little babies they r so stupid and mentally ill someone get these bitches some THERAPY#i want 2 put them under a microscope#watch this be ooc fr furina when more of her lore drops if shes not girlfail im leaving#anyway see u in a week im going on a trip ill get back 2 u in 6-7 business days
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Small Revali’s for anyone who needs it. This guy has me in a chokehold
#IM SLOWLY BECOMING OBSESSED WITH HIM#LIKE LINEBECK LEVELS OBSESSED#HELP#ITS THE BLUE MF THAT ACT ARROGANT AND AMAZING BUT THEY REALLY HAVE UNDERLYING MENTAL ISSUES UNDERNEATH IT ALL 😭😭😭😭#also Teba went back in time and adopted the guy he idolized his whole life#idc what y’all say that’s what he did#I love it cuz the champions all acted like mentors for the future fellas#and Teba is specifically said to be a guy who idolizes Revali#but revali isn’t a mentor figure to him in AOC#honestly he’s more a friend but I like to think that Teba is the mentor figure#or the father figure#cuz revali is a little brat who needs therapy fr#anyways hdksbsksbsk#Teba my beloved#I HATE how detailed botw/AOC/totk designs are#none of these drawings are with totk but ITS THE SAME WORLD#WHY ARE THERE SO MANY DETAILS YOU WEIRDOS#/lh#legend of zelda#legend of zelda age of calamity#hyrule warriors age of calamity#age of calamity#king of the Gerudo#only cuz Revali’s design for that is here#hey moon I say I redesign the characters but in reality I just make them easier to draw djskdbksnsks#revali#teba
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remember when will graham said “abandonment requires expectation” that line goes so hard
#he said like a liar#I know he feels some abandonment he is trying to deny#just like me fr#no matter how hard I try to keep myself from being in situations where I could feel abandoned it still happens#its honestly a reoccurring motif for me#I want people to be as steadfast to me as I am to them#anyway#I need therapy#hannibal#nbc hannibal#will graham#my posts
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I'm fully convinced that holding hands with Josh would solve at least 99.9% of my problems
#i think about it all the time#we do that in my delusions but i mean fr#like the thought of his hand wrapped around mine is so comforting#leave me alone its bedtime and im just thinking my bedtime thoughts#i need therapy#josh hutcherson#girlblogging#josh futturman#derek danforth#mike schmidt
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me supporting my mom's rights: that woman does not belong in the kitchen !!!!!!!!!!!!!! she belongs in the PSYCH WARD !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
#everytime i interact w my mom i take -4375 hp damage#like im not even able to abuse my lil substances bc im out of my meds & its a muslim household so i cant drink#also this is fr not a joke she needs heavy therapy#txt
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This is long overdue, but here is the ref sheet for Klaus Lierstark! He's the main character of my personal passion project where he's a monster hunter who, due to specific circumstances, lost 10 years of his memory and is working with a demon to get them back. The two of them travel through the mortal realm and through different planes later on, solving different dilemmas and unearthing the greater plots at play in their world. they also discover more about themselves and each other along the way!
Hopefully now that i'm on summer break i can start posting more official stuff for this project of mine!! im so excited to finally have more time in my life to write more for Klaus and his world! i hope you enjoy reading thru it twirls hair stick around if you wanna see his boyfriend's demon patron's ref sheet in about a month hehe
Transcript for the written information on the sheet, expansions on said info, and closeup on details under the cut:
Klaus Lierstark (next to his basic outfit is his height: 6'6 or 200cm)
Human, White and Chinese
46 years old
Lives in the mountains as a monster hunter
10 years ago made a pact with a patron for magic
Recently lost those 10 years of memories
Made a new deal with demon patron that if Klaus acts as [the demon patron's] bodyguard, his patron will endeavour to help Klaus recover his memories
Now traverses the mortal realm with his demon patron, but starts developing feelings beyond the parameters of their agreement
✧ ABILITIES ✧
Enhanced strength and speed
Swift healing
message reception from patron (any distance and interplanar but only one way; Klaus can only receive messages from his patron, not send any)
Limited spellcasting (still in the midst of learning)
Proficiency with virtually all melee weapons
✧ LIKES ✧
Warm, thick clothing
Home cooking; doing it and eating it
Outdoor activities (eg fishing, hunting, hiking)
heavy/strong tasting food and drink
✧ DISLIKES ✧
Complex social situations (eg parties, negotiations; just any event where people's motives aren't immediately obvious and every word matters)
manipulative people/social situations (eg talking to someone who purposely misconstrues what you say to prove a point)
really humid and hot climates
Being idle in the same place/indoors for too long
✧ FUN FACTS ✧
Really high resting body temperature; feels like a furnace 90% of the time (really prone to overheating as a result, even in the mountains)
lactose intolerant
greatly enjoys romantic poetry and stories
most normal guy in the whole story (im not joking thats why hes the protagonist of the story because he's so normal)
Closeup on details:
(i will figure out how to do an image id for the ref sheets hopefully soon! theres so much text here already weeps)
#clerichs.png#did you miss me and my art teehee#ITS FINALLY DONE. THIS TOOK A MONTH BETWEEN PAPERS AND FINALS SOBS#klaus is real now..... now you can start to understand all his blorbo tags.....#hes just like me fr hes my forever babygirl#im so excited for this project omfg ive been rotating it since hs#and now i finally have the time and quality of life to create more for it#there is so much of me in this project but klaus specifically... my therapy oc its not even funny. that crook in his finger is from me.#this project is gonna be crazy and i wont even be able to share all of it... its okay yall will get tidbits ill dripfeed the lore#this is where things change and look up for me teehee i have a stockpile of content for klaus and his boyfriend#this project is so personal to me. learning to want to live again and to love life....finding your way in the world no matter where u are#hope and love and peace on the planet earf#NAYWAYS. YOU ALL WILL SEE MY INSANITY. SOON. STICK AROUND FOR THE RIDE.#my art#my artwork#original art#original character#original project#oc#oc art#oc artwork#digital art#digital drawing#character design#character art#character reference#artists on tumblr#klaus lierstark
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what people who dont have anxiety dont understand about anxiety is that its not worry about something -> do it and its not that bad -> relax. its more like worry about something -> do it and feel sick and terrified the whole time even if its objectively not that bad -> spend a period of time that cld be hours or days feeling anxious sick and restless while you try to get over it. like the anxiety does not leave once the anxious event is over. oh and also -> feel even more anxious the next time u are in a similar situation bc now you have the memory of how bad it felt last time -> cycle repeat ad nauseum
#^ MY experience of anxiety aware that its not like that for everyone#im getting therapy this year fr though im going to be so normal and well adjusted soon
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[ID: a sketch page of various drawings of Willow Park from the owl house. From left to right the drawings are: timeskip willow playing flyer derby, Willow in her season 1 casual outfit next to her in her season 3 Halloween costume, Willow as Anne in an amphibia au, young willow doing pottery with her dad Gilbert, young willow and amity holding hands/hugging and smiling, and willow looking at clover, who's perched on her finger and wearing a dress and wig made of yarn so as to resemble Willow. Willow is trying to hold back laughter while clover looks unamused. In the center is a drawing of Willow drawing a large spell circle with her staff, and the title of the sketch page reads "willow week 2023", with each drawing labeled as a specific day/prompt, such as day 3: flyer derby/fav on-screen outfit, day 1: crossover, day 2: childhood/father-daughter, or day 1: palismen bonding. Drawings 2, 6, and 7 are coloured while the rest are uncoloured. The background is a scribbly green. End ID]
hi I’m only a month or so late to it BUT! Nearly out of the mines (finals) and that means i can post the sketch page i worked on for Willow Week! Hosted by @agrebel18
#the owl house#toh#willow park#willow week 2023#gilbert park#amity blight#eh yeah. They’re there too#anyway i had. So many issues regarding the quality of this drawing man#I MADE THE CANVAS TOO GOTDANG BIG!!!#im gonna draft this first and then do a quality review#anyway i wanted to do willow week back when it was actually running but like i said. Ihave been in the mines#almost out though! Just gotta get through Wednesday#still kinda going insane in my enclosure though. Idk if its a period mood swing or if imjust drinking internet pond water#and thats why I’m starting to think evil thoughts#ive just been watching jerma play simpsons hit and run#fr though I’m being digitally waterboarded i need to go to a social excursion so bad#god. I missed posting art just to vent in the tags. Exhilarating. This is my therapy#anyway hope you enjoy this aggie and all other willow enjoyers#also i missed posting abt the 2 month anniversary of the finale#im not coping <3
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hi more drug question
I have been told many many times that using ecstasy will basically fry your seratonin receptors so that you will never be able to feel happy again unless you are using the drug. I am assuming now that this is false but I am curious now as to how false. Is it something that CAN happen if you take too much at once or too often, or is this just random Drug Scary misinformation
Also also since wellbutrin is not an SSRI does LSD work when you are on it or does it also cancel it out
lol that's kind of an extreme version of what I usually hear! you're right that basically the answer here is no. this comes from a couple different things. first is MDMA induced serotonin toxicity, and 2nd is something called "serotonin syndrome" which is a real thing that can happen, but it's really really hard to get like this. prepare for a very long answer lmfaooo
MDMA induced serotonin toxicity occurs when you take too high doses too frequently. MDMA IS slightly neurotoxic, but so are many prescription drugs so don't let that word freak you out too much! basically MDMA works by dumping large amounts of serotonin into your brain, hence why it's the happy/love drug lol. if you take too much too often, your brain will straight up run out of serotonin. obviously that's bad! it's not as simple as "never feeling happy again" but you will essentially have depression for a bit because of lack of serotonin (on its own, low serotonin levels following modest MDMA use is not damaging and resolves within a few days) but the real problem is that if you are on MDMA with depleted serotonin, your brain will continue releasing dopamine which will attach to the serotonin receptors and damage them. this is what can cause long term depression symptoms, the damaged serotonin receptors. ultimately your brain will heal this on its own unless for some reason I guess you keep taking it a lot (which would have no effect. when you take too much MDMA your brain just runs out of serotonin to dump so like. it just won't work lol)?? it can also be treated with the supplement NAC, which I would recommend taking any time you use MDMA because of this!
to sum up MDMA toxicity: it can happen but only if you're misusing it! it's generally recommended that you dont do much more than 1 dose every 3 months or so to make sure your brain has time to reset. research interactions with anything else you're using (prescription or not), take some NAC in the weeks following a dose, drink a lot of water, keep your body temperature regular because that can worsen it, and take some antioxidants like alpha lipoic acid and grape seed oil during/immediately after taking MDMA - it's when you come down that your brain is delicate and could use the protection. also this may sound counterintuitive but weed also has antioxidant properties, so smoking it as you come down helps a lot. also if you DO have MDMA toxicity taking more MDMA will not help u feel happy unfortunately it will just make it worse lol, your brain only has so much serotonin to give
now serotonin syndrome can happen with the misuse of any drug that works on serotonin including MAOIs, SSRIs, and SNRIs, usually by taking a VERY large dose (but some people are just extremely sensitive). it usually takes care of itself eventually, but the amount of time it takes and stuff is kinda hard to pin down bc it's REALLY misunderstood and tends to be overly self diagnosed. again this is like super super hard to do. you would have to take a MASSIVE dose or mix it with other serotonin affecting drugs (ESPECIALLY MAOIs. DO NOT MIX MDMA WITH MAOI ANTI DEPRESSANTS). like 5 times the normal dose at least probably (partner is currently trying to find some literature on it so he'll add that in the replies if he finds anything interesting). it will cause things like heightened anxiety and body temperature and can cause kidney problems or seizures if it's like really bad and untreated. but you'd feel REALLY bad before it got to that point, so in general like, if you take any type of drug and feel extremely bad after go to the doctor lol. mostly this will also just heal itself; your brain is pretty resilient! again usually if this does happen it's very minor. cases bad enough to require hospitalization are exceedingly rare
to give you an example of what these can look like, I have a friend who was given about 3-4 times a regular dose by a fucking piece of shit asshole she knows and, this part is crucial, it was mixed with a very large amount of alcohol AND acid (which can slightly increase the neurotoxicity. normally not a huge issue but becomes one in circumstances like this), AND coke; like she was blackout drunk and while not on a lot of acid or coke, this is just too many things to have in your body and brain at one time. the mixture of such a large amount different drugs caused her what I'm guessing was a mild case of both of these things at once. she experienced slightly worsened depression for about 6 months after, and actually had a mild stutter for almost a year. I made sure she took some NAC and other things that aid brain healing, and she didn't try molly again for a long time to be super sure she didn't overload her brain before it was ready. this is a pretty extreme case, and even with that she has fully recovered thankfully. do NOT EVER do drugs with someone you don't trust with your life. DO NOT EVER do drugs in doses you have not confirmed for yourself to be safe and DO NOT EVER mix drugs without finding out if it's safe!!! just as a small aside though: usually taking molly and acid at the same time is perfectly safe. in fact it's called a candy flip and I HIGHLY recommend it because it's fucking awesome. again, just make sure you are taking safe doses in a safe environment
OKAY now finally your specific question about Wellbutrin: I actually take Wellbutrin so I can answer this one from personal experience! Wellbutrin should not alter the effects of LSD in any way HOWEVER! both of these drugs lower your seizure threshold! I'm on the max dose of Wellbutrin (which is the max dose BECAUSE of seizure risk) so when I plan to drop acid I usually either skip my dose entirely that day or only take half depending on how much acid I'm planning to take. because of the way Wellbutrin works, this shouldn't cause you any problems as far as that goes. for me, not taking my Wellbutrin for a day mainly has the effect of making me more fatigued, and acid counteracts that really well by making me feel very awake/aware. if you don't want to skip or halve your dose though you can also take things that will RAISE your seizure threshold. so like I sometimes will smoke hemp because CBD actually will help with that. the risk here isn't huge either way especially if you have no history of seizures, but again if it's something you're concerned about you should be just fine skipping or lowering your dose for the day. acid usually lasts about 12 hours too so i personally don't even care about skipping the Wellbutrin that much because it basically does the same thing for me. I did take my full Wellbutrin dose the last couple times I've done acid though because I was taking a very small amount of acid (about half a tab)
in summation lol sort of TLDR I generally would recommend MDMA for recreational use because the risks of damage are low and it's safe if you are safe about it. and it's honestly just a really fun one! the only negative effect I've ever felt is some emotional and physical fatigue the following day, and this is largely because of how emotional and energetic you are on it. I just make sure to have the next day off to lay around and listen to music :)
taking it with a partner or loved one will give you an especially beautiful experience, as MDMA has been proven to facilitate extremely open emotional conversations. in fact, when MDMA was first synthesized it's primary use was in psychotherapy! research was shut down during the war on drugs, but in recent studies it's demonstrated amazing abilities to treat and even straight up CURE disorders like PTSD. for a personal anecdote, my partner actually completely fucking cured his alcoholism on a combo of MDMA and whippets (nitrous oxide) lmfao. like dude straight up went from getting black out drunk multiple nights a week to drinking nothing for the past year and a half without any other treatment program. LSD has been proven to have similar incredible results with treating and curing things like depression, anxiety, PTSD and addiction and is also a very fun and very safe one.
sorry to reiterate for the billionth time lol but it's important: these drugs are safe and fun if you make sure they're safe and fun! do your research and never use in an unfamiliar environment with people you wouldn't trust in an emergency! also I know this sounds like a lot, but remember I'm giving you like the absolute safest possible practices and emphasizing sort of over cautiousness because I think it's always better to be too safe. I've taken molly without nac and I've taken kinda big doses a little closer together than I should have without any problems. there's a bit of flexibility to these guidelines, but it's always better to think of them as being rigid so you don't end up too far in the other direction. like I've said it's really really hard to do actual damage that would last more than like a day or 2 max. most of the time you'll just be sleepy the next day from all the dancing so it's nice to do it on a day 1 of a weekend. also it only lasts like a couple of hours lol so it's not your whole day or anything!
#sorry this took me like a fucking hour i kept having to check myself w my partner + google to make sure i wasnt talking out of my ass lmfao#im sure ill be rereading and editing it for the next hour as well#damn just spent like another half hour#hope this is thorough enough for ya ajdbsjhdkshdkshs#on a tangentially related note: ive been weaning myself off of my SNRI (venlafaxine/effexor) bc it didnt help at all#and made my nails extremely brittle ????? like so bad they were constantly breaking to the quick and making me bleed#so pretty soon ill be able to do acid and molly again. sweet blessed molly how ive missed you#cant believe i forgot to mention this but as another personal mdma anecdote: my partner and i started dating while candy flipping#hed been staying at my house for like 4 months at that point but we hadnt really talked about like. relationship definitions#and I was EXTREMELY nervous bc id never even like kissed someone fr before him#but the acid and ESPECIALLY the molly made talking about our feelings with each other really easy and safe feeling#we do it every once in a while as like a poor mans couples therapy lmfao. its much easier to be open and honest and vulnerable#while crucially taking down the defensive wall that can cause you to lash out and stuff#highly recommend 👍#wtiting a book called the couple that rolls together stays together. its about doing molly but also skateboarding#drug ed#i cant stop adding to this post im sorry
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not to interrupt my lotr queue but wtaf is going on with jjk. i feel like ive been given cursed knowledge. my friend convinced me to binge the whole thing and i finished 3 days ago. and now this. what the fuck.
#i dipped me toe in at the most devastating time fr like what the FUCK gege#i've been spoiledddd the spoilers arrived its allllll over#why do i feel like i've been here both for 5 mins and 50 years already#this show is the manifestation of 'when your card declines at therapy'#i thought i was fine and then my card declined at therapy and at first i thought they were letting me stall payment until the next session#but instead they just brought out jjk#that's how this shit feels#like. wow. devastating. did not need that in my life rn. i haven't even gotten over nobara and nanami yet#at this point a gun in my mouth would be a better shot at happiness#(the entire fandom says in unison)#anyways. d20 finale rocked. jjk spoilers rocked ME.#i am delivering gege to god in a fucking body bag#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#jjk spoilers#jjk 261#andis thought geyser
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me when people hate on aos trek:
#starlight fandom#starlight trek#LOOK I KNOW THEY AREN’T GOOD MOVIES THEY WERE IF MARVEL HIT STAR TREK WITH A BASEBALL BAT BEHIND A CLUB#BUT AOS GOT ME INTO STAR TREK IN THE FIRST PLACE OKAY IT HAS A PLACE IN MY HEART FOREVER#AND IT’S NOT AOS!JIM’S FAULT THAT THEY WROTE HIM BAD I ACTUALLY THINK ITS REAL INTERESTING#TO SEE A VERSION OF JIM KIRK THAT’S TRAUMATIZED AND FUCKED UP AND DIDN’T HAVE A FATHER AND YET HE STILL ENDS UP COMPASSIONATE#HE STILL ENDS UP A LEADER AND KIND#like fr tho that’s a fascinating concept#how much things may be different and how Spock!prime broke the timeline by melding with aos!kirk#and Kirk still ends up kind and loving and beloved anyway!!!!!#like I’m sorry they didn’t execute well until beyond and honestly I ignore stid entirely but it’s such a cool concept to me#and Karl urban as bones was so. SO. SO GOOD. he was perfect and deranged in the best way#Quinto-Spock I can take or leave but I do love me a bitchy Vulcan and he did have that#it’s okay to not like aos I don’t blame anyone for not liking it but I am so fond of it folks I truly am#and I’m not just saying that b/c the fic I’m writing rn for comfort and therapy reasons is projecting my current issues on aos!kirk#he’s just really to project onto and he looks like he’d benefit from ketamine treatment too and learning how to have hobbies w/o stress#anyway like I said I don’t blame anyone for disliking it or erasing it from their fandom memory#but it got me into Star Trek and I’m grateful and if ppl weren’t cowards aos!kirk would be so fucking fascinating in a feral way
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the barbie movie should be state-sanctioned mandatory viewing
#i saw it today and like......... i crie#like its such a good movie that gives a perfect breakdown of misogyny and just the overall toxic beauty standards society holds over people#and even kinda touches on how easy it can be for young boys to be black-pilled and sent down pipelines for like andrew tate-type misogyny b#and how thats untrue and ultimately makes men unhappy and ends up damaging all genders#its very like nah fuck you its not women its bc ur depressed and toxic and you cant hold women responsible for your own misery#and not her job to educate and hold your hand or reward u for not being a piece of shit#but ALSO if you are AFAB boy howdy this shit was like free therapy#like thanks greta my pores are clear my mental illness is gone and my cellulite & unproportionate body with asymmetric features looks GREAT#like fr movie to watch when you got low-self esteem bc it makes you feel human and worthy and YOU are beautiful and important#also theres a trans; plus-sized; and disabled barbie !!!#two of them are the main barbies!!!!!!!! AAHHHHH#plus many non-white barbies#bro fr blows my mind theres a trans woman on screen as like a main barbie thats fucking WILD#they mustve had to fight like fuck to get that#oh another reason to like the film: conservatives are going to VOMIT BLOOD over it#mfs are going to be pissing and shitting and crying and cumming and contracting and just MALDING over a feel-good barbie movie#and i love that for us as a society 💅🏻#barbie#greta gerwig#barbie movie#barbie spoilers#???? i guess#also sorry for all the tags holy SHIT#i just have a lot of FEELINGS
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if there's anything 2024 is telling me so far, its that i really really really need to go to therapy
#like fuck me between my mom's health issues and other things going on in my life im just so aghhhhhhh#like god the day i can move out of this damn house and idk live on my terms will be the day ill be so happy fr#but for now...... maybe therapy....at the least#luna.txt#u know its bad when i make vent posts two days in a row..... rip me#this year really has not been my yr so far and im so :) fine and nrmal
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if i had a nickel for every time i opened some short unassuming bg3 fic only to wind up in a completely emotionally devastating tailspin of self discovery & acceptance I'd probably have enough to doordash myself dinner rn
#no fr tho because the amount of times ive opened like a short pwp or something only to realize its about kink reclaimation#and its GOOD. and i sit there just emotionally feeling like ive run an entire marathon like i have to go sit down#ppl are so talented im like i didnt even think this was a topic fic typically handled and had never thought about before#i need to go leave comments on a bunch of them but im still getting my brain back together#anyways props y'all are extremely talented and more effective than years of therapy lmfao#questlog
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thanks for that post. 10 years of medical training, humiliation and exams, followed by lack of employment due to cutbacks to healthcare, just so I can read your reblogged little post about how doctors say they know everything and humiliate patients. And the notes about how all doctors do is tell people they're fat. Which of course is the truth 100% of the time. Right. Great. Good to know nothing I ever did amounted to anything, that my own generation hates me. Thanks for that, thanks for the anxiety attack, for making me cry on the bus home, you shitbrick. There's no good doctors, mate, you're absolutely right. This doesn't hurt anyone, we don't try to go into this field because we care, because we want to help. We just want power and money, right? Because we're famously overpaid, us the doctors? True, right? Love and peace. I wish you the best. I'm going to fucking kill myself
crazy how you’re studying to become a doctor when you can’t read
#ask#are you fr#in that post i literally noted that i have had good doctors that have helped me very much#but yes it’s all my fault you’re feeling this way. GO TO THERAPY#look im not looking to be mean. but you clearly misinterpreted my post#took it extremely personally#and then sent me this unhinged ask saying youre gonna kill yourself bc i made a post discussing how a field you happen to be in#sometimes hurts people and its a systemic issue#yes all doctors are horrible money grubbing little bastards who do nothing but lie. thats exactly what i said no misinterpretation there#dawg if ten years of dedicating your life to something can be cut down by one person on the internet#giving critique and sharing their experience#then well i dont know what to tell you. that sounds like a personal issue#sorry if youre feeling bad but i need you to realize that this is a deeply weird message to send to a complete stranger#if you would allow me to play doctor for a moment. i think you could maybe use a good long nights sleep and a snack with protein#maybe i worded the post badly. and i’m sorry if i did. i could have done better. but this is not a fucking appropriate response#you could simply open a dialogue and ask me to elaborate#ya know. learn from patient experiences so you can be a better doctor#i would have been happy to have a conversation about it and explain what i meant#but now you called me a shitbrick and blamed me for your depressive episode so. now i’m not being nice
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