#its my therapy fr
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okay so i saw something on my fyp on tik tok and it really just... irked me so i want to talk about it here
basically it was about an episode in the vampire diaries where elena compells (mind controls him for any non tvd fans) her brother to leave town so he can escape the dangerous world of supernatural and her best friend bonnie thinks its wrong.
anyway they have this whole fight abt why elena did it and how bonnie didn't think she should have and this is what they says for context:
Bonnie: i just feel it's really wrong that you compelled jeremy (elenas brother) to leave town
Elena: i'm doing it to protect him. i want to give him a chance at a happily normal life
Bonnie: he should be able to choose how he wants to live it, you're taking his choices away
Elena: bonnie you can't tell him
um so i felt all yucky after that and the caption was 'do you agree with bonnie?' so i checked the comments and... majority of them sided with elena.
i just can't understand it. it physically makes me ill thinking about it because how can you agree with someone when they take your choices away? it's your life, you should be able to choose what to do with it.
anyway i was just shocked that so many people believed elena was in the right and now i can't get it out of my head so yeah here i am talking about it bc idk what else to do
:)
#tik tok#tumblr#alice rants#ranting is so fun#its my therapy fr#tvd#the vampire diaries#my life my choice#free will#freedom#fyp#elena gilbert#bonnie bennet#jeremy gilbert
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☆ even the gods bleed [ pt 2 ]
{☆} characters furina, neuvillette {☆} notes cult au, imposter au, multi-chapter, gender neutral reader {☆} warnings none {☆} word count 1.9k {☆} previous [ 1 ]
This had to be a punishment of some sort – some kind of divine punishment.
She was bored out of her mind just watching the sleeping body – she hadn't blinked once in the past five hours, her eyes were really starting to hurt. Yet they still hadn't moved so much as an inch since she sequestered them away to the only place she had known to be safe.
But it'd been almost a week since then.
The only solace she found was that Teyvat had seemed much less hellbent on collapsing in on itself like a dying star.
That counted for something.
Not much, but something!
..Even if their position was no better then it was a week ago.
There was, after all, still the issue of what to do about the false Creator – the actual imposter – and the Archons following them like blind lambs. The other Archons wouldn't listen if she tried to reason with them, and it would only risk the life of Divine One if she spoke of their location to anyone else.
She also was pretty fond of having her head still attached to her shoulders.
So she avoided them all together. Partially because she wasn't sure she wouldn't have a breakdown at the sight of them..she'd never been a fighter, and fighting an Archon? Easy pass.
Instead she was forced to babysit the sleeping Divine until they woke up while Neuvillette handled taking care of the nation and dealing with the other Archons – and by extension the false Creator.
Really though, she would almost think them dead if not for the subtle rise and fall of their chest.
Though..this also left her with a lot of time to herself. A lot of time to think.
She really didn't like it.
There wasn't a lot to occupy her mind and what little there was only distracted her for a scant few moments before her eyes drifted back to the Divine like she was locked in their orbit, unable to escape.
She closed the same book for the twelfth time – she kept count – and returned it to it's meticulously designed place within her bookcase. A low, barely audible huff of frustration escaped her lips before she could bite it down, her stare boring a hole into the body of the Divine One with a sharp intensity she rarely showed.
She was tired, bored and constantly on edge, fearing that at any moment someone would find out about their presence here.
That, at the drop of a hat, she would be powerless to stop the greatest tragedy of her time play out before her eyes.
Neuvillette would have scolded her for being so petulant, especially around the Divine One, if he were here.
But he wasn't.
He was out running her nation, instead.
And what was she doing? Nothing!
She grit her teeth, nails digging harshly into the palm of her hands as she took a deep breath – now was not the time to think about that. She had..much more pressing matters. Sulking and letting her thoughts spiral helped no one, least of all herself.
Yet her attention was caught by a harsh inhale, the rustle of fabric – were they finally waking up? She was exhausted, but it all vanished at the sudden drop of life within the otherwise deathly still body of the Divine.
Her eyes followed the subtle twitch of their fingers, watching as their brow furrowed and their features twisted in something almost like..pain.
..She wasn't ready.
What was she supposed to say?
Should she even say anything? Would that be considered impolite? Does she wait for them to speak first? Should she kneel? Bow?
She doesn't get much time to find her own answer before their lashes flutter, chest heaving with every strangled breath. Every single thought vanishes from her mind the moment she meets their eyes.
For a long, silent moment she thinks that her heart must have stopped.
Their eyes glow like the cresting of the sun over the horizon, painting the world in hues of gold – yet it also reminded her of the dipping of the moon below the waves, casting the briefest, most gentle of lights upon the world engulfed in darkness. In the depths of their eyes was the birth and death of stars in the infinite cosmos – glittering stars in a sea of empty, blank space that left her feeling lightheaded and breathless.
Beneath the splendor is a spark of recognition in their eyes so vibrant it was like a shooting star piercing through the dark night sky, leaving nothing but the wonder in the eyes of the observer as the only proof it ever existed – brilliant in it's beauty, however brief.
It is the most beautiful thing she has ever seen.
"Focalors?"
The lilt of their voice nearly made her knees buckle beneath her – euphoria so consuming it left her feeling she was starving swallowed her whole, her mind blanking in a moment of utter bliss. It was..an indescribable feeling that she doubted she could ever hope to put into words – not in a way that could properly express it, try as she might.
She swallowed the words that threatened to spill from her lips – she couldn't make a fool of herself. Not in front of them of all people. She'd never forgive herself.
"Divine One," She rasps, clearing her throat and covering her mouth with a hand to mask both her nervousness and the small smile that creeps across her face. She quickly regains her composure, hand resting on her hip as she puffs out her chest with every bit of pride she can manage. "I am sure you must be confused, but worry not– your most loyal acolyte has seen the truth!"
The silence is deafening.
She opens one eye, peaking at the bewildered and almost distraught expression of the Divine.
"What the hell are you talking about?"
That..she was not prepared for. Surely they knew who they were! Surely they knew. They had to– she's been praying to them for as long as she's breathed, she's dedicated every hour of her life to living up to their ideals, they can't just–!
"Lady Furina?"
Neuvillette, thankfully, spares her the embarrassment of having a meltdown in front of the Divine, the gentle rap of his knuckles against the door making her and the Divine pause, the soft lull of his voice soothing her nerves and yet setting her on edge at the same time.
"Neuvillette." She clears her throat again, her steps hurried as she marches to the door and pries it open none too gently, a forced smile pulling at her lips. She wastes no time tugging the man into the room, shutting the door behind him with a short huff. The silence is, somehow, even worse then before as the three of them stare at each other in absolute exasperation.
Neuvillette, for his part, manages to get his act together with a sharp clearing of his throat, bowing so low even she looks unnerved. She steals a brief glance at the Divine, and she's taken aback by the uncomfortability twisting their features into a grimace.
Their expression is schooled back into one of empty apathy when he stands back to his full height, but she saw it – she knows she did! Did they not like their worship? Were they not respectful enough? For a moment, she feared the Divine would smite Neuvillette down on the spot..but they just stared at him like he was a ghost.
"Why aren't you killing me?"
The defeated, resigned tone combined with the way their voice cracks makes her heart ache in her chest – it feels as though her entire world is crumbling down at her feet, and she cannot explain why she feels such emotions so strongly, but it is suffocating. It is almost as if Teyvat itself is weeping, bearing down upon her shoulders like a heavy weight.
She feels the urge to weep herself, but she powers through, gritting her teeth long enough for Neuvillette to take his place at the side of her – though it feels more like their – bed, kneeling like he was going to pray.
"Divine One," He offers a hand with a quiet rumble of his voice, the words slipping off his tongue like honey. It's like trying to soothe a stray cat..though she'd never voice such comparisons of the most Divine out loud. "I..we mean you no harm. I swear on my authority as the Iudex of Fontaine and Chief Justice that you are safe with us."
The skepticism she expected, but the reverence in which Neuvillette must convince them – or perhaps they are simply so tired that they simply did not care any longer if it was all some ploy to drive a knife between their ribs. She didn't expect them to actually place their hand in Neuvillette's.
He didn't either, judging by the way he visibly brightened – not that they'd notice, but she did.
..Not that she could really blame him, her heels clicking against the floorboards as she shifted her weight to the other foot with a nervous energy that was practically bursting at the seams, more then a little jealous of the attention he was receiving. She was the one who found them, she was the one who stayed with them the entire time..but he gets all the attention?
How unfair.
"O-of course! We would never lay a hand on our creator," She adds, her voice a little higher pitched then she would have liked as she placed her hands on her hips, puffing out her chest and brushing off the sting of jealousy. "Least of all I– your most loyal, most devout acolyte!"
She felt baffled when she heard the sound of their laughter, her shoulders hunching and her cheeks flushing on mere instinct – she was expecting mockery, but the look in their eyes, still dulled by a pain she cannot even begin to imagine, made her hesitate.
..It was, perhaps, the most genuine thing she'd heard from them ever since before the hunt began.
She wasn't sure why her heart hurt at such an idea, but it was enthralling to see the beginnings of a half hearted smile on their lips.
For a moment, her mask of theatrics was forgotten as she stared at them in a mixture of awe and adoration– and though she didn't look at Neuvillette, she could imagine he must've shared such an expression.
Had she any doubts that they were her Creator, that they alone were the most Divine..they would wiped clean now. There was no mistaking the way the world itself seemed to grow clearer as they glanced up at her like she was worth something.
For a moment, she realized how cold the false Creators gaze had been now that she has felt warmth so gentle it almost made her knees buckle beneath her. It felt like a pale imitation, now.
Nothing could compare to the warmth that spread through her body at the mere semblance of a smile upon their lips. She didn't even mind if it was her they were laughing at anymore, she just wanted to hear them laugh again.
She'd make a fool of herself, if she had to.
She'd never felt so..ravenous for such a thing, but just the briefest glimpse was addictive.
She simply couldn't help herself from striding across the room and clasping their free hand in her own, her smile wide enough to unnerve as she leaned her weight onto the bed. For a moment, she considered pulling away at the way they startled, but her mind was made up by then – there was no going back.
"Again."
#sagau#genshin sagau#self aware genshin#genshin impact sagau#self aware genshin impact#fic tag#neuvillette#focalors#furina#dont ask what happened here idk#this was. also supposed 2 be neuvi focused and then i.#dont talk 2 me abt focalors i wont ever shut up#got a 300k word essay on hand abt how i feel abt her character/how i interpret her personality and her story#focalors jsut like me fr fr (cries at the slightest inconvenience or the slightest mean comment)#shes so pathetic girlfail im gonna chew on her#what happens when reader gets stuck with two emotionally repressed french bastards?? hell#neuvi is the “emotionless” flavor of emotionally repressed in that hes HORRIBLE at showing emotions at all#ask him to smile and its incredibly unnerving and theres too many teeth but hes trying his best please call him pretty or he will cry :(#furina is the flavor of emotionally repressed where she makes it up by having Too Many emotions#using theatrics and masks to show everyone what they want to see but inside this girl is a MESS#constant anxiety and panic 24/7#will do random shit and look at you and if u dont compliment her she will think u hate her and cry#compliment her and she'll do even stupider shit to try and impress you more#i love my scrunkly little babies they r so stupid and mentally ill someone get these bitches some THERAPY#i want 2 put them under a microscope#watch this be ooc fr furina when more of her lore drops if shes not girlfail im leaving#anyway see u in a week im going on a trip ill get back 2 u in 6-7 business days
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Small Revali’s for anyone who needs it. This guy has me in a chokehold
#IM SLOWLY BECOMING OBSESSED WITH HIM#LIKE LINEBECK LEVELS OBSESSED#HELP#ITS THE BLUE MF THAT ACT ARROGANT AND AMAZING BUT THEY REALLY HAVE UNDERLYING MENTAL ISSUES UNDERNEATH IT ALL 😭😭😭😭#also Teba went back in time and adopted the guy he idolized his whole life#idc what y’all say that’s what he did#I love it cuz the champions all acted like mentors for the future fellas#and Teba is specifically said to be a guy who idolizes Revali#but revali isn’t a mentor figure to him in AOC#honestly he’s more a friend but I like to think that Teba is the mentor figure#or the father figure#cuz revali is a little brat who needs therapy fr#anyways hdksbsksbsk#Teba my beloved#I HATE how detailed botw/AOC/totk designs are#none of these drawings are with totk but ITS THE SAME WORLD#WHY ARE THERE SO MANY DETAILS YOU WEIRDOS#/lh#legend of zelda#legend of zelda age of calamity#hyrule warriors age of calamity#age of calamity#king of the Gerudo#only cuz Revali’s design for that is here#hey moon I say I redesign the characters but in reality I just make them easier to draw djskdbksnsks#revali#teba
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man starts playing rhythm games as anger management. 20 killed 2 injured 3 missing
#malos (xbc2)#xenoblade chronicles 2#patapon#jumpcut to jin with a pillow over his head nc malos keeps playing patapon in bed#on an old beat up homebrewed vita with no headphones#dint ask me to explain this goes hand in hand with my 'malos fishes as therapy' hc#in modern aus#scribbles#its been a while since i drew him. its been a while since i drew fr tbh
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remember when will graham said “abandonment requires expectation” that line goes so hard
#he said like a liar#I know he feels some abandonment he is trying to deny#just like me fr#no matter how hard I try to keep myself from being in situations where I could feel abandoned it still happens#its honestly a reoccurring motif for me#I want people to be as steadfast to me as I am to them#anyway#I need therapy#hannibal#nbc hannibal#will graham#my posts
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I'm fully convinced that holding hands with Josh would solve at least 99.9% of my problems
#i think about it all the time#we do that in my delusions but i mean fr#like the thought of his hand wrapped around mine is so comforting#leave me alone its bedtime and im just thinking my bedtime thoughts#i need therapy#josh hutcherson#girlblogging#josh futturman#derek danforth#mike schmidt
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Y'all just cool with clicking kudos on darkfics? Nah bro I'm not ab to out myself like that ima close the tab giving the 20min experience of reading that a silent thas crazy and thank u tho
Fr I see the list of kudos accs names and I'm like..... Should I make a second acc for reading vs my one for writing cus. I won't lie I'm not THAT honest 😂
#dw im making it sound worde than it is#or am i.....#lol jk fr its not that dark depending on the type of genres yr used to but also most ppl would tie my ass to a pyre & light a match#but like thats me on a regular tuesday so honestly depends on where ur cuming from#i think im being too shy tho bc KS has worse than what im reading and alot of the time i continue out of curiosity and good writing#like i deadass saw a fic that was like the most deadest of doves tags n the bio/descrip was like “just felt like writing it”#like BABE thas CRAZY. i am ASTOUNDED and ENVIOUS of ur IDGAF energy#like. just so casually *posts the most despicable content then like ~ anyways i gotta gotta make breakfast ttyl 💖* i truly admire the#lack of care for anyone elses opinion. honestly i think the world needs more of that. but like. not involving them tags bro that shit CRAZY#anyways i appreciate u ao3 authors u sick fucks stay hydrated go to therapy and dont skip breakfast!!! 💖💖💖#& u know if this is shocking me then its some shocking shit. but like. dead dove do not eat is what it says on the label 🤷🏽#ao3#archive of our own#ao3 memes#ao3 authors#ao3 writers
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Michael Myers appreciation post <333
I recently watched og Halloween and Halloween II. I LOVE this movies, they were so funny and Micheal is just a silly dude in these. Honestly thought he would be more serious (considering that big part of the fandom potrays him like so) but he really have a good sense of humor.
Love this guy so much :3
Also here is Amanda from Saw bc I wanted to draw her too
#halloween#halloween 1978#michael myers#og michael myers#just a silly little guy#i love him so much#i would die for him#i cried when he died in sequel fr fr#he deserved better#tbh he wasn't scary at all#little goofball of chaos#i laughed so hard that i died#i'm posting this from depths of hell#i'm in hell bc i laughed when he killed#hehe jk#i'm not in hell but i wish to be#god its so cold where i live now#i need to toss myself into flames#amanda young#saw#saw franchise#saw 2004#lesbian with stinky father figure#john definetly stank#but i love him too#i need father like him#maybe i need therapy instead of writing these tags#lol no#tumblr is better that therapy#i love writing tags on here bc my mind just jumps around
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me supporting my mom's rights: that woman does not belong in the kitchen !!!!!!!!!!!!!! she belongs in the PSYCH WARD !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
#everytime i interact w my mom i take -4375 hp damage#like im not even able to abuse my lil substances bc im out of my meds & its a muslim household so i cant drink#also this is fr not a joke she needs heavy therapy#txt
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what people who dont have anxiety dont understand about anxiety is that its not worry about something -> do it and its not that bad -> relax. its more like worry about something -> do it and feel sick and terrified the whole time even if its objectively not that bad -> spend a period of time that cld be hours or days feeling anxious sick and restless while you try to get over it. like the anxiety does not leave once the anxious event is over. oh and also -> feel even more anxious the next time u are in a similar situation bc now you have the memory of how bad it felt last time -> cycle repeat ad nauseum
#^ MY experience of anxiety aware that its not like that for everyone#im getting therapy this year fr though im going to be so normal and well adjusted soon
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[ID: a sketch page of various drawings of Willow Park from the owl house. From left to right the drawings are: timeskip willow playing flyer derby, Willow in her season 1 casual outfit next to her in her season 3 Halloween costume, Willow as Anne in an amphibia au, young willow doing pottery with her dad Gilbert, young willow and amity holding hands/hugging and smiling, and willow looking at clover, who's perched on her finger and wearing a dress and wig made of yarn so as to resemble Willow. Willow is trying to hold back laughter while clover looks unamused. In the center is a drawing of Willow drawing a large spell circle with her staff, and the title of the sketch page reads "willow week 2023", with each drawing labeled as a specific day/prompt, such as day 3: flyer derby/fav on-screen outfit, day 1: crossover, day 2: childhood/father-daughter, or day 1: palismen bonding. Drawings 2, 6, and 7 are coloured while the rest are uncoloured. The background is a scribbly green. End ID]
hi I’m only a month or so late to it BUT! Nearly out of the mines (finals) and that means i can post the sketch page i worked on for Willow Week! Hosted by @agrebel18
#the owl house#toh#willow park#willow week 2023#gilbert park#amity blight#eh yeah. They’re there too#anyway i had. So many issues regarding the quality of this drawing man#I MADE THE CANVAS TOO GOTDANG BIG!!!#im gonna draft this first and then do a quality review#anyway i wanted to do willow week back when it was actually running but like i said. Ihave been in the mines#almost out though! Just gotta get through Wednesday#still kinda going insane in my enclosure though. Idk if its a period mood swing or if imjust drinking internet pond water#and thats why I’m starting to think evil thoughts#ive just been watching jerma play simpsons hit and run#fr though I’m being digitally waterboarded i need to go to a social excursion so bad#god. I missed posting art just to vent in the tags. Exhilarating. This is my therapy#anyway hope you enjoy this aggie and all other willow enjoyers#also i missed posting abt the 2 month anniversary of the finale#im not coping <3
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Homophobic meat car in this book.
#my conspiracy theory about stephen king influence on the vnas gains another point#dantes new adventures#bad therapy#but fr im loving this to death its so good. its so good
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i hope they handle langdon's recovery properly. coming from house where they do it AWFULLY i hope it's serious and honest and raw and i hope he isn't perfect with it but ultimately works at it for the better and is able to overcome his addiction and if he does ever relapse, i hope he's supported through that and i hope robby apologises for how he treated him when they're both in a better place
#chaos.txt#the pitt posting#im being so fr when i say my heart is WITH him. im rooting for him and i think 10 months is a long time for even#a guy in denial to get out of denial and at least get into therapy. and presumably rehab based on what the writers are saying.#i hope people don't treat him like he's made of glass i hope they're honest and firm and i hope people don't just keep mentioning kiara#as someone who is Mentally Unwell the big reason i don't tell many people is because sometimes i actually don't want to talk about it#and that's fine? sometimes its enough for someone to know and be able to keep you safe by just existing in proximity to you#i hope we have a langdon/mckay conversation i hope robby doesn't actually do random urine tests#but like. it would be so deliciously angsty if that was a Thing that had to happen. it makes sense.#and like. in house its this big joke. i hope it is really fucking serious#i hope he gets an OD case and insists on being able to handle it and then has a panic attack in paeds or the restroom#guys can you tell he's my favourite ^_^#its so ANNOYING. i was supposed to have these brainworms about SAMIRA.
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being so strong enduring the worst streaming service to watch Georgie and Mandy’s first marriage
#its like exposure therapy#there’s too many damn commercials#once I finish the shows I need this service for its goodbye forever#😤#this is a silly thing to complain about but it’s my blog I can complain 🤣#anyway#I finished young Sheldon today I cried#cadence rambles#but fr I hate paramount plus#it’s a necessary evil
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not to interrupt my lotr queue but wtaf is going on with jjk. i feel like ive been given cursed knowledge. my friend convinced me to binge the whole thing and i finished 3 days ago. and now this. what the fuck.
#i dipped me toe in at the most devastating time fr like what the FUCK gege#i've been spoiledddd the spoilers arrived its allllll over#why do i feel like i've been here both for 5 mins and 50 years already#this show is the manifestation of 'when your card declines at therapy'#i thought i was fine and then my card declined at therapy and at first i thought they were letting me stall payment until the next session#but instead they just brought out jjk#that's how this shit feels#like. wow. devastating. did not need that in my life rn. i haven't even gotten over nobara and nanami yet#at this point a gun in my mouth would be a better shot at happiness#(the entire fandom says in unison)#anyways. d20 finale rocked. jjk spoilers rocked ME.#i am delivering gege to god in a fucking body bag#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#jjk spoilers#jjk 261#andis thought geyser
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me when people hate on aos trek:

#starlight fandom#starlight trek#LOOK I KNOW THEY AREN’T GOOD MOVIES THEY WERE IF MARVEL HIT STAR TREK WITH A BASEBALL BAT BEHIND A CLUB#BUT AOS GOT ME INTO STAR TREK IN THE FIRST PLACE OKAY IT HAS A PLACE IN MY HEART FOREVER#AND IT’S NOT AOS!JIM’S FAULT THAT THEY WROTE HIM BAD I ACTUALLY THINK ITS REAL INTERESTING#TO SEE A VERSION OF JIM KIRK THAT’S TRAUMATIZED AND FUCKED UP AND DIDN’T HAVE A FATHER AND YET HE STILL ENDS UP COMPASSIONATE#HE STILL ENDS UP A LEADER AND KIND#like fr tho that’s a fascinating concept#how much things may be different and how Spock!prime broke the timeline by melding with aos!kirk#and Kirk still ends up kind and loving and beloved anyway!!!!!#like I’m sorry they didn’t execute well until beyond and honestly I ignore stid entirely but it’s such a cool concept to me#and Karl urban as bones was so. SO. SO GOOD. he was perfect and deranged in the best way#Quinto-Spock I can take or leave but I do love me a bitchy Vulcan and he did have that#it’s okay to not like aos I don’t blame anyone for not liking it but I am so fond of it folks I truly am#and I’m not just saying that b/c the fic I’m writing rn for comfort and therapy reasons is projecting my current issues on aos!kirk#he’s just really to project onto and he looks like he’d benefit from ketamine treatment too and learning how to have hobbies w/o stress#anyway like I said I don’t blame anyone for disliking it or erasing it from their fandom memory#but it got me into Star Trek and I’m grateful and if ppl weren’t cowards aos!kirk would be so fucking fascinating in a feral way
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