#its hard to focus on ANY of my interests now. its like my brain is somehow even more broken than it was before.

[houseofwolvess]

im forcefully making my brain focus on rottmnt in a last ditch attempt to save my hyperfixation

[angelickisscs]

buying your love ~ blurb ‧₊˚

୨ ୧ ˚₊ pairing ~ jude bellingham x reader

summary: ignoring your ex is a lot harder than you could have imagined

YOUR BACK WAS pressed against the wooden chair as sweat began to settle on your skin. The sun had decided to make a sudden appearance during spring, the humid air emitting from it being enough to push you out of your slowly boiling house. It saved no effort for the summer, instead opting to use it all up on one day.

Your friend’s decision to all meet at the closest pub garden being one that a large number of others had shared. A loud chatter blurred around the edge of your consciousness. Currently, the race that two droplets of water were having to see which would make it to the bottom of the glass first was far too interesting to miss.

There was a disinterest that had followed you around all day. Without any warning, you lacked the ability to focus on anyone’s words or actions. Whether or not that was the heart that clung to you or the brown eyed man that was still trying to get back in contact, you couldn’t be sure.

It was a surprise when your friend’s hand ended up waving itself directly in front of your eyes, its appearance largening in the glass’s reflection.

“You alright?” She questioned you with a cocked head. You sent her a vigorous nod in return, leaning forward to grab a handful of the assorted nuts they had left on your table.

Her eyes watched you atop of her beer glass, your every move forced under a harsh microscope. Your shoulders were beginning to shrink inside of themselves, your body slightly falling downwards in the chair.

Though, when you finally looked up at her, they had been escorted elsewhere. Despite this fact, the discomfort remained in your body, making you shiver no matter the temperature.

You took the chance to look around you slightly. The tables around you were full, little had their umbrellas up, most choosing to catch a tan under the sun’s aggressive rays. Shoulders that had browned were now beginning to taint themselves a particular shade of red, including yours.

One pair of eyes were stuck to your body like super glue when you were about to finish your brief search, their familiar appearance leaving you no choice but to hastily look away.

The water droplets race had now finished, a round two commencing with others running. You had opted for the left side to win, mentally placing a bet on it to see if the distraction could calm your racing heartbeat. Both failed miserably, left colliding with the right side as it was about to cross the finish line.

It left you nothing to do but allow yourself to creep your eyes back in his direction. They met with his once again, his collected appearance being enough for you to glue to him for much longer than originally planned.

A white vest adorned his chest, framing his biceps to such perfection it was worthy of an art museum. The cap he wore shielded his face from most around him but the seats he had opted for gave you a perfect view of him and him, you. Though from the way a cheeky grin had enveloped is face when he realised you were staring directly back at him had you wanting nothing more than to be able to look away.

You could feel your eyes begging to move but your brain managed to keep control of them. It kept them in control for as long as it could before it was deemed as unworthy to be making such decision from your heart. Its delicate outer-layer shattering one too many times by that man to concede zero contact from just a smile.

With that, you rejoined the conversations with your friends no matter how hard it was. His nagging eyes stayed on you, pleading with you for just one more look.

“And my boss just refuses to give me a bloody break!” Your exasperated friend complained one final time before your others moved in to give their equally as annoyed opinions. You had attempted to give your words of advice but the lack of information you had managed to pick up had you agreeing with everything else everyone was saying.

Jude had not left you with that awkward situation for long, your phone soon buzzing with texts from him.

You look beautiful. The first had read, not having a moment to linger in the spotlight before the second came in. I brought you that dress.

You rolled your eyes at both, your hands itching to put the phone down and have a nice evening with your friends like you had promise but it soon became obvious that your brain had appealed your hearts decision and resumed its previous role.

you did. Was all you could muster in that second. The tips of your fingers had moved with such hesitation that it took close to four minutes to type in and send those two words.

It wasn’t even a second before a text from him was shooting back. Maybe I could see more of it tonight.

Looking over to him, you watched as he raised his eyebrows in questioning, pushing you to answer his possibility.

maybe not

You slammed your phone down onto the table after that, the strength at with which you do so mixed with the swiftness shocking all your friends. In attempt to distance yourself from him, you had only ended up closer than ever and that barrier you had set up around your heart was beginning to crumble each time it expanded with more force than it should be.

“I ask again, are you okay?” The final words that Sara had spoken were heavily enunciated, the worry becoming alarmingly clear as she leaned closer towards you.

“Yeah, awesome.” You responded after a few beats. There was a silence that encapsulated your table, each of their eyes on your face with such a violent heat that didn’t mix well with the humidity already getting itself familiar with the air around you.

They all laughed slightly at your answer, obviously not believing either word that you had to say. Though none of them pushed, knowing the effect that it could have if they were to.

Sara used her closeness to snatch your phone from its downward position on the table when everyone had become distracted for a brief second. The notification she had seen on your home screen had her jaw on the floor though she quickly recovered to keep your privacy.

“Him? Again?” She whispered to you as she met with your pleading eyes. Within a matter of milliseconds, it had given her all the information that she could need.

Sara had been the only one to know of the situation that had taken place between Jude and you, her investigative tendencies coming out in full force when she realised you were beginning to become more secretive during hangouts. She wasn’t happy then and nothing had changed since then.

You sighed, a certain sensation that not even you could pinpoint running through your body with a cooling effect. “It’s almost sum-.”

“You’ve tried the summer fling before.”

She was quick in cutting you off, hitting your knee under the table when she did so. Her eyes held such an accusatory look to them that you felt like a child again, your mother scolding you for having a random sweet before dinner.

“He broke contact not me.” You grimaced at your own excuse, “Plus, I turned him down.”

“Take the phone back and tell me you won’t change your mind then.” Her hand was extended in your direction, the pressure that she was putting on you in so many different forms had you doing exactly what she had challenged you to.

The phone case’s corners were lifted out of place before being popped back down, your fingers needing a job that wasn’t texting his latest text back no matter how hesitant they were the first time. He had a particular way of weakening you and you were yet to figure out his exact methods so that you could create a good enough defence to them.

Slowly, you span it around in your hand. The facial ID was quick to recognise your features, your phone unlocking to show you a Venmo notification followed by a text. Out of pure confusion, you made the decision to click on it, already beginning to lose to Sara.

Then maybe I could see you in something else?

The text was sent first, soon followed by the £750 he had decided to send to you.

Your eyes widened so far that they almost encountered your furrowed eyebrows. Looking upwards towards where he once sat, the site of an empty chair and his friends laughing between one another introduced itself to you.

It wasn’t long before you realised where he had ended up, a pair of hands softly falling upon your reddened shoulders. His face was dangerously close to your neck, the warmth of his breath colliding with the flesh on your ears in such a way that it mixed perfectly with the humidity.

“I’ve always liked red on you.”

[coralinnii]

❋ You said what now? ❋

↳ He accidentally found out your feelings

feat: Ruggie ⭑ Chenya ⭑ Lilia ⭑ Epel

genre: fluff (uhh for the most part), humour,

note: no pronouns used with the reader, no explicit spoilers for book 7 in Lilia’s section, reader is referred as human in Lilia’s section, reader is implied to be a first year in Epel’s section, bad cat-related wording in Chenya’s section

Fun fact: while not obvious in the English translation, if you listen to Chenya’s Japanese voice lines, he likes to say “nya” at the end of his sentences.

Will I keep that fact in mind anytime Chenya pops up? Absolutely.

Also, I just started my college classes again last week (which is why I didn’t post last week). All of my classes are dense with text and quizzes so…I need to study real hard which will most likely eat up my time for writing. Good ol’ inconsistent me~

Although, I’m taking History and we focus a bit on the age of nobility and old kingdoms…so maybe some inspiration for my villain/ess!au series (or maybe not cuz history is weirder than one thinks…)

How it happened

Perhaps a little sneaky, Ruggie is someone reliable, resourceful, and fun to be around. You started to fall for him and even that sneaky side of his became endearing to you.

But bigger, financial priorities occupy the hyena beastman’s mind more than anything else. Unless he can make a madol from it or get a freebie, his interest in anything else is seemingly non-existent. It was rather easy to keep your feelings to yourself when the topic of love rarely, if ever, comes up.

So it came to a surprise to you when the shaggy-haired sophomore mentioned his coworkers at a part-time job he picked up in town.

He started ranting about how a duo at his workplace started an unlikely relationship a few days ago. According to him, the two were from two different worlds and didn’t appear to be either of their types.

“Doesn’t make any sense if you ask me” he mumbled, scratching his fluffy head by the sudden revelation at his job.

You nodded and hummed as he recounted his workday with you, but in all honesty, you didn’t share his confusion over the so-called sudden pairing. By the way Ruggie described the couple, it does sound like their personalities wouldn’t mesh well and would theoretically clash too much for anything to bloom between them.

But attraction follows no simple formula. No one can stop themselves from falling for someone. You yourself were an example.

“Love is never predictable, Ruggie.” you commented without thinking, perhaps too distracted by the cute love story of Ruggie’s coworkers or it could be that you’re drowning in the warm feelings from being so close to your crush that your mouth is running too comfortably on its own. “I mean, I never thought you were my type but I still ended up-“

You shut your mouth before you could finish but looking at the wide-eyed expression on Ruggie’s face, the effort was moot.

“You still ended up?”

…Shoot.

What happens now?

Colour him shocked. Ruggie never entertained the idea that you would like him, out of all people.

He could’ve pretended not to figure it out, or convince himself that it was a misunderstanding. But he knew when he saw your flustered embarrassment and your cute stuttering trying to come up with an excuse, there was no misunderstanding. You like him.

Ruggie has a good amount of ego and he wouldn’t downplay his boyish good looks (odds are it got him out of a few close calls), but in a school of celebrities, royalty, and guys with money coming out the wazoo? He knows when he’s outmatched.

To be honest, his brain froze for a moment at your slip up. He clutched his heart which stuttered out of beat, his ears and tail stood in attention like a meerkat. Jack was worried watching his upperclassman in such a daze while folding laundry, heck it even got Leona raising a brow over the uncharacteristic clocked out look on his shorter dormmate.

But, Ruggie is a workaholic hyena. Always planning his way to work up the ladder to earn some good madol. Even if he likes the idea of making a family of his own, romance wasn’t in his peripheral vision at the moment. Not while he’s working multiple jobs at once. He would honestly feel a little bad because he knows he’ll end up ignoring any poor soul stuck with him.

As bad as it is, he might at first think to pretend he heard nothing about your feelings. He couldn’t bring himself to make you go through that, to be in a relationship where work takes precedence over you.

But then he thought it wouldn’t be so bad…snuggling up to you during one of his rare free time. Maybe you’re the type to surprise him with lunch and he could rest on your lap while you brush his hair. Would you maybe rub his sore muscles after an arduous club training session? Having boyfriend privileges means no one can complain when he slides up to your side, keeping your attention to himself without having to share…

Screw it, he’ll figure something out. He’s a greedy hyena through and through

Shyeheehee! Better be ready for what you’re asking for. Once I’ve set my eyes on something, I’m not lettin’ it get away!

How it happened

This man is a literal magic trick, appearing and disappearing to revel in the shock of his unsuspecting audience. As elusive as he is, the times he does show up brings a shock of joy and excitement to you.

It seems that the purple-haired student has made it a habit to join the Heartslabyul’s unbirthday parties from time to time, enjoying the occasional chaos and keeping you company to your conflicted delight.

You didn’t know why but Chenya made it his mission to fluster you every chance he gets, with cheeky comments and sly touches as he leads you away from incoming mishaps such as a stray splash of paint or a flying slice of cake. You don’t know why but the cat-like menace has taken a shine to teasing you out of the blue. Sometimes he would suddenly whisper nonsensical riddles into your ear, or tap your shoulder to then poke your cheek as you turn. Small silly pranks that should annoy you but your body becomes filled with butterflies when he smiles that charming grin at you.

How maddening, you thought as you fell for another sneaky surprise from the impish beastman. Once again, Chenya appeared right behind you, smiling just over your shoulder which gave you and your friends a fright (for different reasons) to which he took pleasure in, judging from the mischievous grin on his lips.

Your shouting caught the attention of the other Heartslabyul students and recognizing the white jacket and castle emblem, their eyes boiled with competitive rage. An RSA student? On Night Raven territory?!

“Ah, looks like fun time is over. I’ll just show meowself out~” and like a mirage, Chenya’s figure disappeared as the NRC students failed to catch even a strand of his fur. Not even when he took a second longer to fade out just so he could teasingly tickle the tip of your nose with his fluffy striped tail.

The students kept on making a fuss, eager to teach the mischief maker a lesson for trespassing on rival territory. You sighed at the wasteful effort, assuming that Chenya would be smart enough to have left long ago.

“Why must my crush be such a frustrating person?” Angry hollers and Riddle’s commanding cease-and-desist orders overwhelmed your tired voice, and your soft words ended up softly carried off into the wind.

But your words caught the interest of a curious ear before it disappeared.

What happens now?

Curiouser and curiouser. He was not expecting such a confession. Though to be fair, he supposed you didn’t mean for anyone to hear it.

Chenya found joy being in your company. The shock in your bright eyes followed by your cute laugh sends a warm, giddy feeling in his heart that he just could not stop. He had a feeling he knew what these feelings could be but he was content with what he could get in the rare moments he can see you.

But now, when he realized what your cute reactions meant? That sends whole new exciting feelings within him. It’s fuzzy and warm as usual, but now also shocking and thrilling. The sneaky beastman is grinning for more than one reason now.

He won’t immediately confess back. Considering this wonderful predicament where you don’t know he knows of your affections, his playful nature compels him to milk the fun of this situation for all its worth.

If you thought his cheeky antics were bad enough, you haven’t seen his flirty side till now. Playful taps on the shoulders become sneaky grabs by the waist, and just when you think he’s gone, his signature grin would grace your vision as he fades into view, a little too close to your own face. Sometimes when he feels emboldened, Chenya would sweep you off your feet for a spontaneous walk along the sweet breeze.

When you’re finally at your wit’s end, when all his teasing and heart-fluttering gestures fills you to the point of combusting in flustered frustration, that’s when he’ll finally tell you his reciprocated feelings, perhaps while stealing a quick kiss when you least suspect it. All to see that terribly adorable look on your pretty face.

Every adventure requires a first step. I’m excited to see where we’ll go together from meow on~

How it happened

See, you thought he already knew. You swore he did. Why else would he tease you so much with his sweet compliments and flirty jokes? The mysterious senior spoke to you as though you were a naive child crushing on their older peer, which you supposed wasn’t entirely wrong.

The way he treated you with so much care and love that you wondered if he already suspected of your feelings and was being considerate to you. He listens to your rambles as though he has all the time in the world for you, compliments you on your achievements as though he’s genuinely proud of your hard work, and he jokes with you with that boyish charm of his. But the scarlet-eyed fae never pursued further with advances with you, which made you think that perhaps this was just who Lilia was, a strange but friendly man, unwilling to hurt your feelings. Were you grasping at straws and misconstruing his intentions?

With a heavy heart, you tried your best to give up your hopes but maintained a cordial bond with Lilia, not wanting to avoid the jovial fae so suddenly (well, without having to explain why anyways)

But one day, when you were walking with the smiling senior, he started talking about a souvenir shirt that Kalim had given him during their club meeting. It was a shirt patterned erratically with various colours and pictures of tiny bats littered about. It was an eccentric visual of fabric but it strangely fits the equally eccentric man.

“What are your thoughts? Would I not look absolutely adorable in this?” Lilia asked, holding the shirt in front in his uniform with a boyish smile, his fangs peeking out slightly. But you rolled your eyes as you sighed exasperated by this man’s antics.

“Don’t you think that’s unfair for you to ask me?” You looked at him with a pout, somewhat irritated at the mature fae you’re trying to get over. “Of course I’d said you would, considering how much I like you”

For a rare moment, Lilia turned wide-eyed at your words. “Pardon? Do you by chance… harbour feelings for me?”

Turns out, he didn’t know at all

What happens now?

Guess you can still surprise this old man. He had his suspicions but for all he knew that was how the youth were these days. He was fond of your shy expressions whenever he was around and he could hear the quickening of your heartbeat, but he didn’t want to assume. Perhaps you were just more on the skittish side.

In the centuries he lived, he saw love in many forms. In the recent centuries he lived, he got to experience some of those forms of love he’s seen, with the pain and joy that comes with it. To him, it couldn’t ask for more as he lives out the last few centuries he has left.

You however, were still vibrant like a freshly bloomed flower in its prime. Was that why he just couldn’t take his eyes off you? He couldn’t help but watch in admiration as you lived with almost enviable vigour. He felt pulled, entranced to be by your side for even just a moment, just to see that beautiful gleam of life (and love, he realized) in your eyes.

But Lilia felt a beat of guilt in his heart. Your life is so short in comparison to his own. You should be sharing your youth with someone as brilliant as yourself, not pining over an old soul like himself. Humans are fickle creatures but he supposed with such short lives, it’s best to be curious and experience all one can without regrets.

He would be honest with you, sharing his thoughts with you as though warning that your affections were better spent with someone that suited you better. It would be up to you to convince the stubborn fae that he was your choice, that you already decided he suited you just fine. All you’re asking from him is if he shared the same feelings as you did.

“I may have tried to get rid of my feelings before, but I’m choosing not to run away this time,” in your eyes, Lilia sees that same vibrant gleam that mesmerized him, almost breathing a new sense of life into him. “All I ask is if you feel the same way”

And he does. He’s lying to himself if he hasn't thought of a life with you where he could steal surprise kisses throughout the day, where he could bring you to soar through the night skies as he takes you to explore the world with him. He imagines a life of silliness but also a life of blissful content as he gazes at you like a beacon of light in his life, a new reason to live a bit longer.

Lilia feels ensnared by love once more, but the burning warmth in his soul is just too invigorating. He’s looking forward to this new chapter in his life, with you.

I do hope you’ve prepared yourself, my dear. Eternal love with a fae should not be taken lightly. But rest assured, I look forward to our new adventure

How it happened

You were Epel’s close friend and confidant, someone who he can share his achievements and woes with. Being so new to the college, the two of you depend on each other through thick or thin and along the way, you grew to see the lavender-haired freshman as more than just a companion.

He has a bit of a temper and is quick to the jump at times, but he was always there for you and even though he doesn’t always see eye-to-eye with them at times, he respects his seniors and takes their lessons to heart.

When he talks about how much he dislikes his height or his feminine features, you nodded along for his sake but you couldn’t tell him that you were actually in disagreement. You adore his fluffy locks that you occasionally got to touch with his permission and his light blue eyes felt like calming waves of the purest lake. Epel constantly swore to you that he’ll have his growth spurt and will even tower Leona in height, but you like how you could hold him close to you without issue.

You love all that he is, even if he’s not too keen on some parts himself

But you kept this all to yourself. You thought Epel had other priorities on his mind and you were scared that confessing would ruin the friendship you’d built with him. For now, you were content to be by his side for however long you can.

You were dead tired during a particularly harsh Flying class with Coach Vargas and you were barely conscious enough to keep your eyes open. It took everything you had to just nod along to whatever Epel was saying, something about some Savanaclaw students?

“Who they think they are, callin’ me cute like that? I outta rip off their yapper for underestimatin’ me.” You weren’t helping his point when you thought how cute his accent was as he grumbled about his day. You were falling in and out of consciousness but thought you should at least reply back to your friend…anything at all…

“I’m sorry…that happened…even though…I think…you’re really cute…”

You were already out cold to notice your friend frozen in place as you finished your drowsy comment, your head landing on his stiff shoulders.

What happens now?

ALDFIUAHLBWAIGLH

Congratulations, you broke your friend and you don’t even remember it. When you woke up, you couldn’t figure out why Epel was as bright red as his hometown’s apples. Epel couldn’t even bring it up without getting too tongue-tied, his accent sputtering out incomprehensible words.

The blue-eyed freshman was raking his brain for an explanation. You thought he was cute…really cute to be precise, but what does that mean? Did you like him? As in like-like him? Is it normal for non-countryside folk to just say something like that? But most students around here tend to mean it like an insult but you weren’t like them, you would never do that to him. So what did you mean by it??

Left without a choice, Epel thought about who he could ask about this, maybe one of his seniors. But he immediately reconsidered when he realized who his seniors were (Vil and Rook will never let this go and there’s no way Leona would entertain this conversation) and turned to the only adult he can trust, his meemaw.

In his letter, he asked his grandma what it means when someone you cherish calls you cute (not mentioning who) and after a few days of fidgeting and awkward encounters with very confused you, he finally got an answer from her.

“STOP SITTIN’ ON YOUR KEISTER TWIDDLIN’ ‘ER THUMBS! GO AND ASK, DAGNABBIT!”

And that’s how you were confronted by a flustered Epel about your cute comment one random school day. To be fair, you probably didn’t fare any better when you realized you let your thoughts slip out.

You may have confessed your attraction to him but Epel can still be the first to make the first move. Relationships and dating are all new to the petite freshman and honestly he felt a little weak in the knees, all the nerves wracking his body like his first broom ride. But the past few days, he couldn’t stop thinking about being with you, sweeping you off your feet, impressing you the only way he can, to have your eyes solely on him like he does when you’re around. Heck, he thought what it’d be like to grow old with you, holding you like no one else can as you spend day and night by each other’s side. All these thoughts and more is what spur him to take the next step.

I ain’t too great on love and romance, but I’ll work hard to show ya how much ya mean to me. I promise that!

[augustinewrites]

cw: suggestive content, fem!reader

“come for a stroll with me.”

“i can’t right now,” wriothesley tells you, glaring down at the mess of papers atop his desk.

it was not in your nature to be petulant, but the over dramatic sigh that falls from your lips has him believing otherwise. 

though he wanted nothing more than to abandon the day's duties and join you on the surface for an afternoon stroll, the lord of the fortress of meropide was a very busy man. he had a prison to run.

“fine,” you say, though your exasperated tone indicates that his refusal was anything but.

“you’re the head doctor,” he reminds you, gesturing to the stacks of paper on his desk. “you know how it is.” 

“actually i don’t, because i don’t do all my work at the last minute.” 

“you have sigewinne, who does more than half of it for you.” 

“sigewinne likes paperwork,” you argue, settling yourself atop the corner of his desk. “you could have a whole team of people to help you with these things, but you’re too picky to let them.”

“they don’t do it right,” he huffs, pen scratching a quick signature across the bottom of the topmost report before shuffling it aside. “i know this place better than any accountant whose only concern is balancing a book.”

“fair enough,” you shrug, picking up and thumbing through his reviewed missives with about as much interest as one watching paint dry. he looks down just as a sneaky smile appears on your lips. “i heard it’s quite nice outside.”

“too warm,” he mutters distractedly, too lost in the process of estate management to chit-chat about the weather. 

“perhaps i should shed a few layers before heading out,” you hum thoughtfully, fanning yourself lightly with his papers. 

wriothesley looks up, about to scold you, but the words dry up before they pass the tip of his tongue. 

you certainly hadn’t outfitted yourself as a future duchess might, forgoing a frilly, structured gown for one of his own loose white button downs that’s tucked into closely tailored trousers. 

it’s with great intrigue that he watched your free hand undo the top two buttons of your (his) shirt, revealing the delicate swatch of skin over your neck and teasing him with a peak at your cleavage. 

you catch him staring as you set his papers down, eyes flashing with delight. like a predator that’s successfully cornered its prey. wriothesley - in a last ditch escape attempt - quickly looks away, clearing his throat and staring hard at the report in front of him. 

he could not get distracted today. not with so much work to do. 

but you, oh you. you hop off his desk, walking around it to drape your arms around his shoulders, pressing a light kiss to his cheek. “i suppose i’ll see you later then.”

he mumbles a reluctant goodbye but your lips linger, brushing dangerously close to that sweet spot behind his ear. 

do not give in, his brain instructs, even though it’s getting harder and harder to process the words in front of him with every slide of your hands. 

schooling his features into a calm mask, wriothesley draws a deep, steadying breath. it hardly manages to settle him because archons, you were going to be the death of him. he’s always considered himself a steadfast person with an immense focus that’d been built up from a young age. when he set his mind to a task, he was a difficult man to distract.

you and your wiles have always been proof of otherwise.

“just be back before our audience with neuvillette this afternoon.” he tells you, doing his best to ignore the heat rising to his face. 

finance reviews, surveillance reports, correspondence. finance reviews, surveillance reports, correspondence. finance reviews, surveillance reports, cor–

“stop it,” he demands when your fingertips glide across his chest, fiddling with the knot of his tie. 

“why?” you ask, voice cloyingly innocent. “am i distracting you, your grace?”

“no.”

you clearly do not believe him in the slightest. 

“care for a wager then? because i bet i can distract you by the end of the day.”

wriothesley knows that betting, wagering, or gambling against a former member of the house of the hearth is never a good idea. it’s a dangerous one.

he leans back, arms crossed over his chest as he attempts to salvage what’s left of his dignity. “what are the stakes?”

_____

you know your boyfriend. it isn’t hard for you to wind him up and get him right where you want. 

which was on top of you. 

or underneath you. it depends on the day.

there were no real intricacies in seducing the mighty and fearsome duke. it wasn’t even that hard to fluster him, because a simple brush of your fingers against his was enough to make his cheeks flush with colour.

you just needed to draw him out a little. you’re on the offense, and you know all the right moves required to force him to engage with you.

in an effort to avoid you and (attempt to) win the bet, wriothesley had locked himself in his office for most of the day. it worked out well for you, because you’d been able to sneak into his quarters holding a shopping bag from chioriya boutique.

your plan is put into motion when you hear the duke stomp up the stairs to get ready for the meeting with neuvillette. 

“get back behind that screen,” he instructs when you poke your head out from behind the divider. he’s even slapped a hand over his eyes, intent on staying focused on the task at hand.

wriothesley huffs when you laugh, turning his back to you as he rummages through the dresser. 

he’s murmuring the little rhyme he uses to knot his tie, so focused on the task that he doesn’t notice the crinkling of the tissue paper as you pull your new…outfit out of its bag.

“hey,” he asks. “are you almost ready?”

“i just need you to lace me up,” you call back, shrugging the shoulders of your gown down a touch before stepping out from behind the divider.

you turn to show him the undone laces of your gown, watching his reflection in the mirror. he’s regaled in the fineries of the duke, having swapped out his shirt for a clean black one and fastened a fine fur coat over his shoulders. you appreciate his appearance greatly, but even more so when he finds your little surprise.

“is this…new?” he asks quietly, gloved fingers brushing undone laces aside to get a better look at what hides underneath your dress. 

it was new. a custom set, in fact. your duke likes you in dark lace and sculpted pieces. 

he inhales sharply when you take his wrist, gently guiding his hand to one of the slits in the side of your skirt. 

wriothesley breathes your name softly when his hand drifts up your dress and settles on your hip, meeting nothing but skin. 

a smug, satisfied grin threatens to break out on your face when you feel his lips brush against your shoulder. you had him on the ropes now. he’s just so easy–

his sweet movements cease suddenly and he pushes you away gently. 

“you almost got me,” he laughs, quickly removing his hands from underneath your dress. he grips the laces, deft fingers making quick work doing it up and pulling it taut and tight to hide the tempting lace of your brassiere. 

“but–”

“go put your underwear back on,” he demands, delivering a firm smack to your rear. 

defeated but not the slightest bit deterred, you reluctantly reach for the abandoned garment as your boyfriend glares at the opposite wall. but losing the battle doesn’t mean losing the war. 

“should i put on the garter belt too?”

_____

downstairs, neuvillette sighs, cursing his better-than-average hearing. 

at least you’d had the sense to leave out some good tea.

[ataleofcrowns]

Hey! I love AToC and have been following its development for a few years now. But whenever a new chapter was released, and I sat down to read it, I often found it hard to carve out time to do so. So, it got me thinking - if it’s hard for me to read it consistently, how much more difficult must it be to write it consistently? It is admirable the act of writing this takes, And while I’m sure there are slower periods in the whole process, it’s inspirational how you dedicate time to writing. I write sometimes, definitely not a lot, and I want to dabble in a few short stories. So, how do you put in that time or really cultivate that habit of writing - especially when pesky "IRL logistics" get in the way? Are there any specific rituals or routines that help overcome such circumstantial challenges? I’ve been in a bit of a rut with the pen lately, and honestly, hearing anything - whether it’s how you approach sitting down to write or just your thoughts on the process - would be incredibly helpful at best and, at the very least, really interesting to hear! Appreciate you sharing your thoughts if you’re able :p

I take an ice bath, chug 6 cans of energy drink back to back, sit down and white knuckle my desk while yelling "LOCK IN" and write 10k words in one hour-

Ok but seriously, I appreciate the ask!! 💖

And honestly it's just a matter of forming the habit, at least for me. I try to write at the same time every day. For me that's in the evenings since I'm more productive at night, but other people might feel more productive in the morning or the afternoon, it all depends! Once it becomes a habit it's much easier to switch your brain to Writing Mode around the same time every day.

When you first start trying to form the habit, don't be down on yourself if you don't get a lot of writing done at first. Try to write things that pique your interest, even if the scenes or snippets aren't in chronological order. Getting something on the page is what's most important!

Also, don't be too hard on yourself while writing, and try not to edit while you write either. This is a bad habit I used to have that I had to unlearn because of my perfectionism, but it's perfectly fine to have a bare bones first draft that you can return to filling out later. Your first draft is not supposed to be perfect, so just focus on writing it first, and evaluating it later.

And write what you feel inspired to write! Like, sometimes I can't be bothered to write out descriptions or character actions, but I get inspired to write a certain conversation between characters, so I literally skip all the descriptive words and only write out the dialogue. Other times I feel inspired by worldbuilding that I want to add, or an environment that I really want to describe, so I write snippets for that, etc.

I also like setting wordcount goals for myself because I get a dopamine boost when I hit the target and it feels like I accomplished something. If you go that route, start out small! Like 250 words every day for example, and as you get into it, bump it up little by little. It also feels good if you go over your wordcount goal, at least for me.

Some other minor things that have helped me: putting on background music (ymmv), removing all potential distractions by closing everything on my pc and fullscreening my writing program, ensuring I have a place where I can write uninterrupted, drinking my favorite tea, motivating myself with rewards for once I hit my wordcount goal (snacks/video games/watching a show).

I hope any of this is useful for you!!

[eveningepiphany]

welcome to the final show | H.S, part 3

my masterlist!

part one and part two!

summary: harry goes over to y/ns hotel for a good old room service dinner, also getting a little tipsy on wine, while starting to blur some lines. and it’s not long before things are no longer just between the two of them.

warnings: fluff, swearing, alcohol, getting a lil wine drunk, paparazzi, being confused on if you’re falling in love or just really good friends.

a/n: i’m so excited to finally have this written for you all! i’ve had some pretty bad writers block, hence the delay in getting it to you, but thank you so much again for your support and I hope you enjoy <3

———

There’s a certain type of attatchment that comes around once and a while. It’s rare.

It’s when things start to flourish. Maybe with a hobby, a passion, or a new found person. One your brain decides to put all its focus and interest on, to the point it’s all consuming.

This one gets stuck to you like glue. Hard to shake in the sense of no matter how hard you try to ignore it, it’s all you can think about.

Losing yourself in daydreams of something or someone without even realising, until you’re reaching for anything that will bring you closer to filling that need.

That’s exactly what’s leading you to be reaching for your phone at any given point of the day.

You imagine many perceive it to be a permanent growth on your person. But you can hardly help it. Texting is a simple way to reach someone. Feel connected.

So, safe to say you’ve messaged Harry more than your own family over the course of this trip.

You’ve become attached. To Harry Styles. Again…?

Of course, being a huge fan it’s easy to say you should probably already be accustomed to this, given your level of obsession.

But this is a whole other ball game. One that is becoming like an internal battle. Your already unhealthy and predisposed infatuation paired with now a real physical connection is enough to render you useless.

You reach for your phone. Text him, your brain begs. You consider. No, stop being clingy you loser, your brain rolls her metaphorical eyes. You place the phone down. Stare at a wall. Think about him. Rinse, repeat.

Not normal, you don’t think.

However, you search for some kind of justification. That you’re just good friends, and all that shit. It’s normal to miss someone you’re friends with.

If he considers you as that.

Which you would hope since you’ve been texting him enough it would be concerning if he saw you as just some mutual of his.

You’re also sitting in a cafe, unfortunately without him right now. Eating a croissant wishing that he were here. Allowing your gaze to linger on the chair across from yourself, imagining his solid frame filling up the empty space. What he would do if you stood up and ran a hand through his hair, maybe lent down a little so you could just—

The ring of the bell atop their entrance chimes and drags you out if your dangerous and spiralling thoughts. And for some reason get excited like you’ve somehow manifested this man to walk through the cafe door by thinking of him.

Feeling silly at the nag of disappointment in your stomach as you see an ordinary bloke saunter over to the till.

Maybe one you would check out, or emit some kind of interest in before you properly met Harry. You would feel disloyal now. Like the parasocial relationship has entered an entirely new level of psychotic.

If it’s still parasocial, that is. Or if now you’re just simply a girl with very cloudy and mixed feelings about a very beautiful man.

You audibly sigh out. Eating the final bite of your admittedly delicious croissant and picking up your phone.

You type out a message, sending it before you can even think it.

I’m in a cafe right now without you and you’ve honestly ruined them for me. I miss you and your free cups of tea.

Without me? Rude.

You laugh at his quip, watching as the little bubble pops back up indicating he’s typing.

I’m out right now, but if you’re not busy later we can do something? Go out or I can come over to yours.

You pluck mindlessly at your bottom lip with your teeth, how could you say no to that?

You stress over it either way.

well, you’re very welcome to come over to my hotel room. we can order room service if you want?

To this he texts back an agreement, seemingly keen. And you realise immediately you have to tidy your room before he comes over.

You swing him the location of where you’re staying, including your room and floor number.

Thank you love, ill be there in like 3 hours say? If that works for you.

At that, you stand, because who are you if not over-prepared. And it was time to go make sure your room didn’t like a war had been waged in it when he came over for the first time.

Cant be having a bad impression, you figured.

———

You did in fact rush back to your hotel complex. Not even stopping a crepe stall you passed by, which had to be a first for you. You clean the place until it appears well-kept at the least.

And once you’re finished, you easily fall back into overthinking the whole thing. So excited, yet getting those anxious jitters like a caffeine addict 12 hours no coffee.

Which is why you decide to busy yourself with an afternoon shower. And at the time you’d still had over an hour to go.

You take of course longer than you intended, and shortly after you come out there’s a knock at your door, easily making you jump as you tug a shirt over your head. Regretting the last minute decision for a shower since now you have wet hair and probably look like a right mess.

But it’s not like you can leave him out there while you go blow dry your hair, so you rush over to the door, and tug it open.

His brows shoot up, and a smile slowly blooms on his face as he takes in your appearance.

Your hair is still near dripping, and you stand in bike shorts and a loose tshirt. The most casual he’s ever seen you. Which he loved the look on you more than he admits to himself.

“Hi darling,” he smirks, a warm feeling settling over him as he keeps his eyes on you.

“Hey, Harry.” You stand for a few moments longer, finally shuflling out of his way to let him through the door. He is adorning a white shirt and has the cutest little bandana around his neck.

“I’m sorry,” You laugh, gesturing him inside, “I was drastically overestimating how long it would take me to shower… hence why im in this state.”

He pulls a hand from behind his back, a cup being presented to you.

“Don’t be silly, y’not in a state at all.”

“You’re joking—“ You gently take the cup from his ringed hands, “Harry!”

“M’sorry, m’sorry. I saw a coffee van on the way and I couldn’t help myself.”

“Did you get one for you?”

“No, but I did have a little sip of yours.” He confesses with a quiet laugh. But he quickly busies himself with your room, padding around and peeking out the balcony window.

You take a sip, watching him examine your space. Grateful you cleaned it.

He asks you a few questions about random things in your room, and you settle yourself on the foot of your bed, cross-legged.

You didn’t really think about the lack of seating in your one man room. But this hardly bothers Harry, since he’s scoped up the room service menu from wherever he found it, and sat next to you.

“Alright… what d’we have.” He talks to himself, opening up the menu and scanning over the foods.

You discuss the options, settling on a pizza and pasta to share, because, well, you’re in Italy.

The night progresses easily as time always seems to do when you’re together, and you fake fight over the best kind of pasta sauce. But he lets you have to last slice of pizza so peace is made shortly after.

“Should we order a wine or something? T’wash the pasta down.” He suggests as the sun begins setting.

“Why not, I won’t say no to some wine.”

That gets ordered to your door, and you go from the foot of the bed to lazing at the head of it. Sipping on wine and recounting old stories, or discussing stupid topics.

“Do you think the chicken or the egg came first?” You swirl your glass around, eyes shifting to look at his side profile as he gazes at your roof.

His cute nose outlined by the warm light off the lamp, which you flicked on in the corner after it got dark.

He bursts out into a laugh, “what kind of question is that?”

“I feel like it indicates the sort of person someone is.” You shrug, smiling.

“What like it gives you an intel on my personality?”

“Something like that.” You nod, “and decides if we have to stop being friends, if you answer the wrong one.”

He grins, “Well, maybe tell me which one to pick so we don’t have to do that.”

“Awh, so you don’t want to stop being friends?” You coo, still staring at him, watching as his eyes flick from the roof over to you.

“Of course not, who else am I meant to go on cafe dates with.” He laughs.

You’re both teetering on the edge of being tipsy, and it’s evident in the way you’re both talking to one another. Borderline flirting, probably a more fitting way to describe it.

“True, because I’d be very hard to replace.” You snort with sarcasm, taking the another sip of wine.

“You would be! I love our little dates.” He smiles, the second time he’s dropped the word date in the last minute.

You’ve scooted closer to one another somehow. Shoulder to shoulder as you steal glances of his beautiful face. Maybe this was subconscious, or on purpose. But you’re drawn to him like a magnet.

“So do I…” You flush.

“I’m a little tipsy.” You clarify, breaking the searing eye contact and looking at the near-empty glass in your hand. A fourth refill would easily tip you over the edge.

He lets out a quiet laugh, “Wine gone to y’head too?”

“Mhm, and I have a track record of poor decision making when I have too much of it.” You recall the plenty of times you did the stupidest shit just because you were wine drunk. Hoping that does not happen tonight.

“Might have to see it one day.”

“One day…” you agree, but you realise that you’re not really in Italy for much longer. You have about a week and a half left now.

“I… Harry,” you turn your body to face him, and he sits up a little, noticing the almost serious tone to your voice.

“I’m leaving soon.” You blurt it out, because it’s the only topic of conversation you’ve both been steering clear of. The thing neither of you want to address because eventually this won’t be easy to do. Who knows how many miles could get out between you.

And it almost hurts you to admit yourself because… where exactly does that leave you both?

Does your contact end when you leave Italy? Do you become people who occasionally text on a bi-monthly basis?

He draws a breath, “So am I.”

You let out your own tortured sigh, turning to pop your glass on the beside table and then lean your head onto his shoulder.

Your heart jumps at the contact, and somewhere in your brain, sober Y/N lets out a gasp, because she would never have the balls to do that.

So the wine maybe was a great idea…?

He wraps an arm around your back, “I go back to London after this.”

“Second week of August as well?” You pray it’s not earlier than the start of the month, since tomorrow is literally the 1st.

“Yea, the 13th.” He nods and it’s the only tiny shred of relief you’re getting from all this. That there’s still time left.

“I fly out on the 12th.” You say quietly.

But there’s a small silence that consumes you both for the first time since you met. Because you’re kind of exasperated for options right now. What do you say to someone who is going to inevitably slip from your grip.

You shake your head at nothing in particular, moving to wrap your arms around his shoulders, since words really weren’t going to cut it.

Somewhere in his muddled brain he notes this is the second time you’ve ever initiated a hug. And he leans into it, the arm he had around your back tugging you infinitely closer.

Your cheek is pressed to his neck, and you swear you feel his lips ghosting over the top of your head.

Slowly, you pull back. And he watches you with sharp green eyes. You hold that gaze, until he’s the one that breaks it. Stifling a groan with his hand, covering his face.

You look at him quizzically.

“I like this more than I probably should.” He gestures now between the two of you.

You chuckle, a tiny flutter in your stomach announcing it’s presence.

“So we’re making the most of the time left in Italy, then?” You put forward, ready to nearly wipe your schedule clean for the man.

Which, who could blame you?

“What are y’doing tomorrow?”

“Nothing, if you’re the one asking.” You laugh, and he smiles wide at your comment.

“Oh, is that so darling?”

You roll your eyes in attempt to be convincing, “of course, you always buy me tea so…”

“Well, that decides we’re going to another cafe I suppose.” His hand reaches for his phone strewn on the quilt somewhere, pulling up google maps to find some nearby cafes.

You perch your head back onto his shoulder to watch him scroll through the options. He stumbles on a beautiful looking one, less than a 10 minute walk away. He looks to see if you approve.

He peers down to where you rest on his frame, smiling unwillingly at the sight of you. Your own eyes trailing up to meet his.

And he swears they linger on his lips. Just for a fraction of a second.

“Mh, what d’ya think.” He gets out, voice suddenly several octaves lower. Almost gravelly.

You almost audibly gulp at the sound of him. Hyperaware of his existence right now, you could nearly zone out thinking about the strength of his arm muscle that’s right now pressed against you.

“Yea… yea that looks amazing. And tomorrow, what time?” Your hands fiddle with themselves in your lap.

“How about 1, since you’re probably gonna wanna sleep in a bit.” He suggests, free hand pushing his curls from his eyes.

The way he knows you’re probably going to want to sleep in. God.

“I’m down.” (Bad)

A smile erupts over your face, and you almost forget that the clock is still ticking. That you only have so long left here.

Which ‘almost forgetting’ isn’t enough to stifle the urge to use it as some kind of yolo shit. Because that is unbelievably strong. Like why not just invite him to stay the night?

Maybe another glass of wine and you can gaslight yourself into cuddling him and just falling asleep. He wouldnt leave unless he had to, so it’s an almost flawless plan.

———

The plan infact, was flawless.

To say the least, he slept at yours. In your bed.

I mean you don’t really remember it, since you talked into the early hours of the morning and drank some more alcohol to really top it all off.

You woke up under the covers, still clutching onto Harrys side.

He was already awake, scrolling on his phone, seemingly unbothered by the fact your head had taken residency on his chest.

You take the initiative to glance at the time in the upper-right corner of his phone, a little shocked when it reads 11:47am.

You do groan at the morning light streaming in the windows immediately after seeing the time though.

“G’morning. D’ya have a headache?” He asks with what you can only assume is the end of his morning voice. Which although just a taste, is enough to send you spiralling.

It’s also around now you realise he’s stripped down into boxers— still clad in his white shirt. What the fuck!

You struggle to form a coherent response.

“Morning. A little.” Your voice comes out as a hum.

Somehow, considering you’re cuddling him right now and you literally just slept in the same bed all night, both of you outwardly are quite relaxed about it.

Nothing is awkward. It feels lovely.

“I want a croissant so bad.” You huff, sitting up, stomach growling like as if you hadn’t eaten in a whole 24 hours.

“So, you’re the kind of person that’s hungry immediately after they wake up?” He laughs, hand coming to push the locks of your bed hair out of your face.

Outside of the sheer domesticity of that (which makes you literally have heart palpitations), your hair is a proper train wreck.

The humidity in Italy has made it horrific.

“I guess I am right now?” You reply to his previous ask, combing your fingers through the locks.

“Jesus Christ.” You curse at its uncooperativeness.

“Y’know that episode of friends where Monica complains about how the humidity fucks her hair, she was so right.”

“I love friends.” He immediately gasps, nearly jolting upright in excitement.

You laugh at his enthusiastic reaction, noting that you have to somehow find time over the next week to watch an episode or two with him.

“And if it’s any consolation, I think your hair looks great.”

“Yea well, it’s not like you’d really be able to relate to the frizzy hair. Since yours look so perfect all the time.” You joke.

This evokes a genuine flush on his face, “Alright, Y/N, calm it down.”

He’s laughing but you swear he actually looks a little flustered. Without the wine as a confidence booster, he seemed like suddenly he didn’t know how to take a compliment.

Unbelievable to you since he probably gets that many a day from strangers on the street.

“I, am going to get up and get ready then, so we can go out and eat.” You state, excited to be seemingly spending the majority of the day with him.

He holds back the urge to beg you to stay in bed with him, and says something nonchalant as if he doesn’t mind you getting up. But when you pad off to the bathroom he stares at your now empty space. And immediately shivers at the lack of your body warmth, despite the already warm humid weather.

After a few trips in and out of the bathroom you come out looking beautiful. And he has to get himself up and ready to go in attempt to not overthink it.

You craved his closeness the whole time it took you to prepare for the day. Every few minutes you’d get this almost overpowering urge to just go out there and throw yourself back into his arms.

It’s borderline pathetic. But now you’ve had him in your bed, his strong arms coddled around you, it’s very hard to not to be just that. His physical presence is perfect and comforting. You’re attached to that as much as any other aspect of him.

He puts on his pants, which were folded neatly on his own bedside table, plucking out the car keys in his pocket, “Im gonna nick down to my rental car, because I have an extra button up in there, so I’ll wear that out.”

He comes back and changes into said white button up, stripping his worn shirt off and leaving it somewhere.

Just like that, you’re ready to go, and you both decide to walk the short way there. It was too nice a morning to not.

The whole walk you’re chatting away as usual. But it’s paired with this newfound physical aspect. The way you so obviously want to be close it hurts.

Yet somehow you both act like it’s nothing. That the brushes of hands and shoulder as you’re in step beside each other is a simple coincidence.

And that when you get breakfast, the two croissants and shared cookie is just a friendly thing. In your head you’re even playing off the touching all throughout breakfast.

Which sounds dirty— but just the little conversational touches. Like a hand reaching out to touch a forearm in laughter, acting as if it adds something important to the moment being shared.

Or that somehow when you leave the cafe, with two takeaway cups of tea, the hands that end up interlinked softly between the two of you is just…

Well… who even knows anymore?

Because you’re walking through italy beside Harry— who is talking about his favourite kind of playground equipment, regardless of if he’s a near thirty year old man— all while holding your hand.

And to take a moment, because it’s important, his hands are everything they’re talked up to be. Littered with chunky rings and calloused fingertips from the years of guitar playing. Yet contrasted by his soft palms, which cups yours with this delicateness it almost brings a tear to your eye.

You also pray that your own hand isn’t sweating profusely in his grasp, because you wouldn’t put a clammy hand past yourself. The already humid weather paired with your anxiety surrounding this whole situation is quite literally the match made in hell.

Nothing about this can be passed off as casual to your brain anymore. You’re literally about to implode.

But you strive to hide it. So you solider on.

“I’m a seesaw girl okay. Hear me out—“

“No, I can totally see that!” He interjects, and you chuckle at his quick agreement to your statement.

“Right? They are so much fun. And even though I nearly took a tooth out playing on one when I was 7, I can still recognise they are superior.”

To that he laughs and bumps his shoulder into yours, “I mean I love that. I’m probably a swing person, I feel like no matter the age I will always be down for it.”

You can agree that a swing is a solid second favourite for you. And as you talk about that point with him, you don’t realise you’ve walked the whole ‘scenic’ route back to your hotel until you turn the corner and the entrance is around the corner ahead. And the way you went usually takes an extra 20 minutes.

It went so fast.

“Are you gonna head off or… come back up with me?” You ask gingerly, the hand not interlaced with his fiddling with the fabric of your clothing.

“Not sick of m’yet?”

“Never…” You shake your head, smiling as he gleams at your answer.

“M’flattered. The feelings mutual love,” he chuckles, “However I do have to go remind my family I’m alive. But it’ll only take about a day until they’re pleased for me to ditch them.”

Gently runs his thumb over your knuckles, whether it be subconsciously or not, “So tomorrow night ill come back over to yours for dinner if you y’want?”

You smile, a little sappy over the way he’s working a plan out like you’re both teenagers, “Yea, thats perfect, and we can try something else off the menu.”

“Maybe, if you want,” he begins carefully, “after that you can come over to where we’re staying. Meet my mum and sister. They’ll love you.”

Now you’re nearly bursting at the seems, “Oh, I would love that, H!”

“Okay, it’s a plan then.” He agrees, pulling his keys from his pocket.

You bid your farewells for the night, unlinking hands and being left with a tingling sensation in it, one that you wonder if he’s also getting.

You go to your hotel room and feel full with joy.

He is all too sweet for this world. And you’re a little obsessed.

———

Although Italy being in Italy feels like being in a bubble, and like you’re so far away from the real world, it is unfortunately a purely mental one.

And there’s one thing about a headspace like that, and it’s just how quickly it can be popped.

At midnight that night a notification pops up on your phone, one that when you open, you have to physically put your phone down.

harryflorals:

what do i even caption this post because is that who i think it is or am i officially delusional? “HARRY WITH A FAN FROM THE LAST SHOW, HOLDING HANDS IN ITALY!” correct me if I’m wrong YALL idek anymore.

And this time, there’s no grain saving your ass. Because this was taken on what, quality wise, looks like a digital camera.

Which has made it so painstakingly obvious that it’s you. And you don’t even remember it being taken?

It was when you were walking back from the cafe, holding hands probably talking about fucking seesaws.

And everyone has caught on fast, because in the comments it’s an all out frenzy.

So, cats officially out of the bag.

———

y’all can expect a part four considering i lowkey left this on a cliffhanger 😝 so its on its way my loves

update: next part, PART 4!

taglist:

@harrystylesgirlie @purple9950 @teamspideyman @rociolunaa21 @spiritofbuddha @lemonhrry @deamus-liv @Iquvlly @kuntxrgraudunkelbunt @hsfanficsrecss @hsstylesrings @saturnheartz @victoriasigaard @lilfreakjez @mrsvxder @skxawngs @theekyliepage @hannah9921 @shiffpring @multifandomsw @roslastyles420 @slutforcoffein @kittenhere @stylesfever @butterfly-lover @daniizstyles @padf00ts-l0ver @sunflowervol18

+ all the anons who sent stuff to my submission box, thank you to you guys too, all my love

[stylinsoncity]

Hiiii! I know it’s been a while but first! I want to just confirm that I’m definitely alive and well! I’m also back with a new fic, which you might have already seen if you’re subscribed on ao3.

‘Hard times in elmsmere’ is the vampire/witch time travel au I mentioned a while ago and it is now published in its entirety. I hope you enjoy it!

I also want to talk candidly about where I am re: fic writing in general. I’ve been feeling distant for months as I try to focus on my own personal writing and other interests, hence the long hiatus. I hoped that some time away would kind of reboot that part of my brain. But tbh the opposite has happened.

I will absolutely be finishing penn park and an update is coming very soon. by next week, i believe. i also have one more chapter I want to post for notes on oxford and then I’ll likely mark that as completed. i’m not sure what to do with ‘till the end of time’ so I’ll just leave that open for now. but I think by the end of the year, assuming I’ve added one or two more chapters, i’ll likely mark that completed as well. I do still want to publish caya…and once I finish my WIPs, I think I can get back to editing it bit by bit. I’d also love for SEL to be published one day too, but that seems a little out of reach right now.

I really wish I could clone myself and devote my clone to the task of writing all the fics I’ve ever thought about. But sadly it’s just me! D: 

the bottom line is I won’t really be online anymore and the rate I’m able to update my fics will be really slow. I closed my inbox bc I didn’t want asks piling up or for anyone to feel ignored. my messages are still open for now though so if you need to contact me, pls do. but it may take me a while to respond.

since I’ll be away indefinitely and unable to provide permission, i would really appreciate it if my fics were no longer printed or reproduced in any way, this includes translations or reposting.

lastly, I just want to say thank you very very much for the support! it means so much more than i can even express right now. i've enjoyed all the conversations i've had here and all the love that's been shared. this is not quite a goodbye. there are still lots of great chapters to come. But for now I just want to say thank you for understanding and ily!

[daytaker]

NightBringer Satan is a Gift.

I understand everyone has their own opinions on how good/not good NB is as a game or a story or whatever, but in my opinion, Satan's characterization is soooo enhanced by it. I know that this isn't an opinion that everyone shares, but to me, Satan felt emotionally artificial sometimes in the original game (more on that below).* He felt kind of awkward and like he wanted to connect with MC but something was blocking the kind of connection they develop with some of the other brothers. (Disclaimer: I've only done season 1 of OG, so I can't speak to how he's characterized later on. I know, I know, shame. But I'm trying my best.) Getting to see what Satan is like when he doesn't have any control over his emotions makes the stiffness and artificiality make more sense to me, and they become admirable because we get to see just how hard it is for him to get everything under control.

I think they did a really good job with the pacing of his development in NB too. Satan in Lesson 1 and Satan in Lesson 19 are different, but there isn't a moment where he suddenly starts controlling his emotions better. I think there's a lot going on behind the scenes with him as far as his emotional growth and self control are concerned.

Also let's not forget some very important things about Satan that make him, IMO, one of the most interesting characters to work with as a writer:

Satan was never an angel; he had no fall from grace.

Satan was created from Lucifer's wrath---he is literally the product of trauma and self-mutilation.

Satan is significantly younger than his brothers.

He spent the first year of his life more or less trapped in a castle with his deeply emotionally wounded brothers.

He has a deep resentment towards Lucifer that sometimes defies reason---he wishes he didn't dedicate so much of his time and energy to him, but it's basically a compulsion.

He hates his deep association with Lucifer, and he hates that he has a lot in common with him.

And these lead me to some headcanons that live rent-free in my brain every day of my life.

Satan sees himself as a reminder of the Great Celestial War and everything his brothers lost in it, including Lilith.

He is divine retribution against Lucifer for his failure, for leading his brothers to failure, for letting his sister die.

He acts as a counterbalance to Lucifer's pride by bearing the weight of the shame that Lucifer can't fully accept now that he is the Avatar of Pride. Even if Lucifer pushes it out of his mind, Satan never forgets that he failed in the worst way possible.

His biggest aspiration is to become a full and complete person outside of any association he has with Lucifer. He feels like some sort of parasitic tumor that exists only in opposition to his brother, and he wants desperately to escape that role that he feels he was born into.

Anyway, Satan is great, hail Satan, all that good stuff. Did you know I have a lot of thoughts and opinions about Satan? I know, shocking. For more of my takes here's my fic about him (on AO3).

*I think Satan almost metaphorically represents certain elements of autism---emotions that don't come out the way you intend, masking and its limitations, hyperfixations that are barely under control. In Fandom Discourse(TM) there's sometimes a level of focus on more 'cutesy' autistic traits that we find endearing in characters, like social obliviousness and gleefully indulged hyperfixations. But emotional control, emotional masking, emotional seepage, emotional artificiality---these are also real and messy and often times they aren't cute and they're uncomfortable to see in yourself or in someone else. I really don't like diagnosing characters so I'm not about to claim Satan "is" autistic, but as someone who has been called essentially 'spectrum adjacent' by doctors, I relate to the awkwardness and the desire to appear normal despite knowing you're not and emotions spilling out in ugly ways---um. That got really long and personal.

[snapeaddict]

(June) Snapetober Day 31 - Costume

Listen. This might be 8 months late, but at least it's there. I have nothing else to say for my defence.

When his body exploded in pain again, he held down to the one thing that could keep him sane, or so he thought – patterns. It was interesting, really. Albus would certainly have much to say about this. He would say, pensively, ‘Ah, yes. A great flaw of his. Once proven effective, Tom holds on to strict modes of action, and one failure rules out even the most effective strategy’. He would then add something about mental plasticity, perhaps something about the boy Tom had been, as if to reassure himself that he had always been the adult.

In any case, it was true: the Dark Lord was a man of habit, especially when it came to torture. It would take one some time to realise that, of course. It would take many sessions and a rather thorough interest in dark spells to pinpoint each cycle, each pattern. It would take a little more time, then, to place within these patterns the fits of anger, themselves only but a regular variation. But it was doable.

Severus knew them all by heart. The surprise always lay in the intensity and duration of the torture sessions, not in the spells and methods employed. He secretly prided himself on the knowledge that he would have been a much more imaginative torturer had he wished to be; it was naturally not the kind of thing he liked to admit to himself on a good day, but it certainly made encounters such as this one more bearable.

And so he thought of this as his body convulsed; a broken stream of thought, of course, repeatedly interrupted then pursued after fits of spasms, vomiting, and blackouts. By this point he could also track, more or less, retrospectively, how many had occurred, if left alone for a few hours of respite that was. So he counted: one, two, three crucios; head under water; a broken nail, or finger; one choking spell, fire in his veins, a blinding spell, and invasion of his mind.

It was a good idea. Disorientation was the enemy of even the most skilled occlumens. And sudden sensations of cold, or direct burns on the skin, they all made focus within oneself, rather than outside, terribly hard to maintain: it worked, to an extent. Severus had long lost any sense of his surroundings. He maintained the barriers in his mind intact; he ignored the agony of his body, with growing difficulty. He counted the spells.

And repeat.

Repeat.

Repeat.

Darkness again.

It was fine; it was. He knew it was coming. Natural body reflex; exhaustion. He could never evaluate how much time had passed when he awoke, though. That he should work on.

-

‘Severus – Severus. Dear boy, can you hear me?’

He came to, slowly. He heard himself moan pitifully, he tried to exhale to manage the pain, but his nose was stuffed with dry blood. It must have been a while, he thought confusedly. Since it had dried. And where…?

‘Severus.’

The well-known voice reached his ears, then his brain, and he turned his swollen face in its direction, keeping his eyes shut for just another moment as a wave of relief overcame him.

‘Albus…’

He felt a hand stroke his hair. He relaxed, instinctively.

‘I have called Poppy. Do not try to move just now.’

‘Albus…’ Severus repeated a bit louder, as if to convince himself he was not hallucinating. He opened his eyes: the headmaster, who was kneeling just beside him, gave him a joyless but comforting smile. Silver beard, starry robes and blue eyes shone in the moonlight. Still it was dark… the floor was cold. A sigh of relief escaped him when a warming spell slowly reached his freezing bones.

‘I have been so worried, Severus. I waited for you… 5 days, and still no sign of you - no, don’t tire yourself, you will tell me everything later. If you are here, I know all is well.’

Severus started coughing. Gently, softly, in a fatherly way, Albus helped him in a half-sitting position.

The younger man rested his head against the headmaster’s chest, exhausted by the effort.

‘If you are here, I know all is well… isn’t it?’

Severus closed his eyes again. He tried to focus, he fought off the urge to fall asleep in the warm embrace.

‘Headmaster… yes… my cover… it is intact.’

‘He knows nothing?’

‘He knows… what he must know.’

‘You are relaxing, Severus. It is good.’

His breathing slowed, like that of a sleeping man.

‘You are safe… Poppy is coming. Get comfortable. Sleep…’

How good it felt to let go, to be unbothered by what was happening inside, and outside… To no longer be so cold… He was to have tea with Minerva, at 4 pm. What day was it? She would reschedule, surely… Holidays too, soon… Albus sounded satisfied… Hogwarts... Hogwarts, finally…

He smiled slightly, through the pain and spasms. He felt Albus’ arms tighten their grip around him, and fell into a half-sleep.

‘Severus, dear boy.’

But those arms...

‘Dear, dear boy.’

Too tight…

‘You have become too comfortable… too attached.’

Suffocating.

‘You feel safe in his arms, Severus. Tell me... has the spy traded allegiance for safety?’

His eyes snapped open. They met with blue ones which, at first, he thought he recognised. Then he noticed the reddish hue, the pupils, too yellow, too long, too narrow… the smile, predatory.

The spell that had been warming him, started to burn him.

And he had not seen it coming, no; he had not expected the pain, the perversion, had not placed them within the anticipated cycle of cruelty. He had gotten too comfortable.

He was taken by surprise, and a broken-hearted cry escaped his lips.

[simonaslangblabblr]

Why does studying feel like a chore sometimes?

Hi everyone, today I want to talk about the fact that sometimes studying really feels tedious, even if it's something you enjoy and even if it's not bound to deadlines imposed by school or university.

I personally experienced this during the first lockdowns in the pandemic. I had a lot of free time because I was home, but I could not start studying Korean to save my life, I was literally forgetting about it. Indeed, I ended up putting it off until I completed my Master's degree in 2024.

I was not taking it lightheartedly: it was supposed to be something I enjoyed, yet why was I procrastinating it so hard that I was forgetting its entire existence?

🤔The possible answers to my case

Now, I'm not good at self-acceptance, but I tried thinking about all the possibilities without beating myself up, but also while maintaining some objectivity:

We were all home, but it was not a normal time. It was a time where nobody would have known how the future would have been and this could have definitely stressed out our brains.

I was still in university, which meant that I had different priorities at the time. Sum it up with the aforementioned stress, and it becomes much easier to put self-studying at the very last place of your mental list.

I had chosen a language that, for a native Italian speaker, was objectively difficult, because of how different it is (the two languages are not even in the same language macrogroup). Korean grammar also seems to appear very intricate for most language learners across the Internet, from what I've seen.

My attention span got objectively worse: in order to check the news, I was constantly scrolling either on Google or on social media, which made it harder for me to focus. My grades at university did not resent from it, but it made me harder to pick anything study-related outside of my uni workload.

The whole situation, as a result, has made me exhausted and quite detached from my interests and parts of my "identity" pre-pandemic, and I'm still trying to reconnect the pieces nowadays.

🌈 Is it over now?

I'm not sure that the situation is completely solved right now - I definitely do not forget about Korean anymore. However, I have also accepted that life happens and we do not have the same level of motivation every day, and that's okay.

I also implemented some strategies to ease the problem:

I committed to reducing harmful screentime and doomscrolling in order to fix my attention span;

I planned my exercises for every language in advance, so I do not have to stress over what has to be done;

I waited until the end of my university studies before picking up Korean again: sometimes, we're just too busy for the mental load that a certain hobby requires, so the best solution might also be to wait it out until you have more mental space.

I hope this post was useful in case someone had been feeling the same way recently. You got this!

If you have been through the same problem and solved it, how did you do it? Do you have any recommendation?

[crazylittlejester]

*Slowly slides an opinion to the center of the table*

I know Warriors is a honorable character that does their bestest buuuuuutttt…

I need more morally grey Warriors tbh. I want a Warrior that will do morally questionable things to achieve a goal that furthers the betterment of a greater picture, whether that be to get the shadow or to defeat a small group of trouble makers. I like the idea that at the end of the day Warriors, due to environment and societal pressure, will do what it takes, even if it’s ugly to protect and serve those he cares for.

Probably sounds so out of character tho but I like the thought.

Hello again, wish you easy studies and success

✨🧚

The joys of being anonymous

this is definitely one way ive seen people explore his character, but one of the things we’ve REALLY seen from him especially in recent updates is how kind and gentle he is. Like yes he will absolutely get done what needs to get done, he’s the one who would be able to shove emotions aside the fastest and get the job finished, but I don’t think he’d ever be able to rationalize something like causing harm to others for the greater good, he’d spend an INSANE amount of time trying to find a work around to save both (now i DO have a fic with Evil Wars planned out where this is like. The EXACT line of reasoning that led him down the dark path alskkdkdkd, his desperate need to protect the kingdom and feel like he had more control over his situation and life led to him taking over it and making several other bad choices, but that fic is a whole “what if” scenario where Regular Wars and Evil Wars kinda face off because somehow there ended up bein’ two of him and yeah aldkdksl i could do a whole yap about that but it is after 3 am where I live and my brain stopped working)

I do agree that he definitely works hard towards the big picture and he’d be able to force himself to make upsetting decisions or focus on the task at hand instead of letting his emotions cause him to freeze in battle (which is why I firmly believe in him being more of the team medic than Hyrule because his ability to not panic and to focus on HELPING is probably unmatched, plus I think he would’ve gotten actual training to deal with injuries in the military. and also its just a hc of mine that he was trained as a field medic before all the Hero Business uprooted his life.) but anyway I personally think at the end of the day he cares so much for others that he’d try to find a way to save everyone. This man carried fairy food around with him the ENTIRE time and had it in a fairly easy place to access so that he could feed any fairy they MIGHT come across, he’s a big sweetheart who is gonna fight for the bigger picture and all the little things along the way. if he’s sacrificing anything for the greater good, it’s himself (i wuv him very much, he’s my special guy and as you can see i am so so normal about him *squeezes him like a rubber chicken and pats him on the head*)

but yeah that’s an interesting idea to entertain. it would be so easy for him after everything he’d been through to be cold and more hardened by the war and trauma, and it definitely could’ve shaped him to be that way, but he truly is a respectable and honorable person and I really like how he’s written in LU :)

EASY STUDIES AND SUCCESS TO YOU AS WELL 🫡🫡🫡

[zbeez-outlet]

This is my (unasked for) review and critique of Netflix’s live-action adaptation of Avatar: The Last Airbender. I’m not expecting much of a response, I just have so much to say and no one to talk about it with. I’m putting it here so it doesn’t fester in my brain and it’s my blog, I can talk about whatever I want.

I am going to divide it into two major sections, the first being a review of the show as a stand alone, the second being a comparison to the source material. Each section will have smaller headers so I can stay on topic and organized, I’m going to try really hard not to obnoxiously rant or flood my review with unsupported opinions. I have a lot to say, but I want to make sure I articulate myself well and don’t fall into venting without reason. If you see me doing that, please let me know.

I want it to be made clear now that these are my thoughts on the show, I’m not forcing anyone to think the same as I do or insulting anyone for having different views than me. I also want people to know that this is an extensive detailed review, I’m going to be covering a lot of very broad and very narrow topics. I’m not trying to nitpick inconsequential details, this review is supposed to focus on important and fundemental aspects of the show. I will be harsh, but I’m going to try not to be unreasonable.

This is going to be extremely long. If you’re not interested in reading it all, I completely understand and I’m going to include my initial rating and a summary of why I gave it that rating here.

My overall rating of the show: 4/10

Review Summary: While the visual effects and environments were for the most part really great, the quality of writing fell behind drastically in comparison. There were major issues with characterization, consistency, and plot development that will pose a challenge in future seasons. The dialogue was often dry and overly expository, it allowed no room for nuance, subtlety, or complexity because they’re constantly telling us what everyone is doing, thinking, and feeling. The acting was mostly subpar, but I think that was because the writing suffered so greatly rather than through major lack of talent or skill from the actors. The pacing was abysmal, 8 episodes was never going to be enough time to tell this story. For me, it has a very surface level amount of entertainment but as soon as you try to look a little closer, try to answer questions or search for any depth, the quality drops entirely.

Extensive in depth review below. Because I’m not watching the show as I’m writing this, please let me know if I’m misremembering any major details so that I can correct myself if/when needed.

Sorry in advance for how obnoxiously long this is, I tried to give clear headers so you can bounce around any specific topics that interest you.

NETFLIX ATLA as a Stand Alone Show

In this section, I will not be making any comparisons or references to previous Avatar content. I will do my best to strictly speak on what Netflix gave us and its quality in different categories.

Costumes/Makeup

Overall, I thought the design of the costumes and styling was really solid. They felt really unique and representative of the different cultures, which is always appreciated. There was an issue for me though that took me out of the show sometimes. Nothing looked lived in. There was no dirt, stains, wrinkles, or wear and tear of any kind and the colors were so bright. The actors sometimes looked like they were doing a theater play or dressing up for Halloween, not living in a struggling world at war. Overall, costuming and makeup was really good, just throw some dirt on there!

Yue’s wig was terrible, I think we can all agree.

I do have a gripe with Zuko’s design though. His scar looks like a bruise or an eye infection, not a gruesome burn scar. I know I’m not the first person to say this, and I’ll keep saying it until they listen. It needs texture, it needs to be larger, and for the love of god shave his eyebrow.

Environments and Locations

I thought the locations looked great, especially the artful cgi on the wide shots of places like the Southern Air Temple, the Fire Nation and their ships, and Omashu. Good cinematography and just really well done work as a whole. There’s a few times when the backgrounds during scenes looked more like stage sets than lived in cities or villages, but it was rarely anything so drastic it harmed the show for me. I really liked the amount of background clutter and knickknacks that helped with realism and there was always a lot of people that helped these places feel populated. Zuko’s room on his ship especially was so cool, it told so much of his story without ever needing explanation. Having a collection of avatar artifacts and plastering his walls with drawings, research, theories, maps, and plans was genius. I loved that they included animals, once again it helps with immersion and realism, and it would be really easy to just not include them for simplicity sake. Especially the funky animal hybrids, I hope to see more going forward! The use of ice, wood, furs, and bone for the Southern Water Tribe was so good. The massive rib cage for the community hut in the tribe was fantastic. I could go on for a long time. For me, the settings were probably the best part of the season.

Bending Graphics

The strongest elements of bending visually were air and fire. They really captured the movements of each, the fluidity and speed of air bending, and the aggression and passion of fire bending. Earth bending looked okay, the actors did a pretty good job of making it look heavy, but overall it felt like it was moving too slowly to me. I think the scene at the beginning of the first episode was the best example of earth bending. The fight with Bumi was very underwhelming for me.

Water bending looked terrible almost the whole time. The way the water physically looked was pretty good, but there was absolutely no weight behind it. Every time Katara hit someone with water, it splashed with the force of a Nerf water gun. The movements were slow, clunky, and so nonthreatening I probably wouldn’t have tried to dodge a single one of her attacks. Her battle with Pakku was one of the most boring battles I’ve ever seen. There was no haste or desperation in either participant. I’m hoping they’ll figure out how to do this better in the future. The ice was decent though.

As a whole, the fight choreography looked pretty good. Certainly moves I could never do. There were times when characters were completely cgi to account for difficult or impossible moves and it was really obvious. Aang in particular looked very wonky when he was fully cgi during his Avatar State moments or when he was flying around like his introduction scene. So passable but definitely room for improvement, I think the artists who work on these aspects of shows and films are very impressive.

Dialogue

The dialogue is 80% exposition, 19% repetitive conversations about responsibility and duty, and 1% misplaced poorly written humor. It’s unnatural, it’s dry, it doesn’t allow for any nuance, and there’s no room for character growth or connection when they have to waste all their words on making sure the plot is on track.

When the introduction of your main character is him looking directly into the camera and telling us the kind of person he is, there’s a dialogue problem. When so much happens off screen that you have to have characters talk to fill in plot holes because there’s just not enough time to tell the story, there’s a dialogue problem. When you put intentional pauses around bad jokes for people to laugh, there’s a dialogue problem. When characters have to say over and over that they’re family but they don’t feel like family in the slightest, there’s a dialogue and characterization problem. I’m not going to script the bad examples, I don’t have the time or patience for that, but I was very unimpressed. It felt like the first draft of a script to me.

And I dare anyone, of legal drinking age of course, to take a shot every time a character says the words responsibility or duty. I swear the floor and ceiling will switch before you reach episode 3. If characters have to keep shoving their responsibilities down our throats without actually doing anything to solve them, there’s a dialogue, characterization, and plot problem.

Also one of my biggest pet peeves with a series is when the first episode or movie ends with a line like “It’s only the beginning” and then plays crazily dramatic music. But that’s a personal preference, not an actual issue.

Acting

First and foremost, I have nothing against any of these actors. I’m sure they’re perfectly wonderful people and they deserve opportunities to prove themselves. My goal here is not to shame or insult or belittle any actor on this show. That being said, none of their performances were perfect and I do have critiques. This is not meant to be a personal attack on any of them or on anyone who enjoyed their performances.

I think the dialogue and overall writing really worked against the potential these actors had. I don’t know how involved the director was in the filming process or helping them with their performances, but there were definitely some failures here.

The strongest performances to me were Sokka, Iroh, Lieutenant Jee, and the Earth bender that threatened Iroh when he was captured (I couldn’t find his name, but he had an unprecedentedly good performance). By far the best was Jee, I felt his emotion more than any other character on the show and would love to see a lot more of him. Sokka balanced well enough with what he was given, but he also had the most character opportunity (which I’ll get into in the next section). Iroh I think filled the mentor roll pretty well, the writing for him leaned a little to close to fortune cookie, but he did feel wise and powerful when he needed to be, mostly. For a comedian though, his humor fell really flat to me, I wish they had given Paul Sun-Hyung Lee some freedom to improv, I think he would’ve done a good job if he could play with the character.

Katara and Azula were awful (so was Mai, but she didn’t get a lot of screen time so I’m not going to focus on her). Katara was so dull and emotionless for the majority of her role, her delivery felt so unnatural. Again, I think the writing was an obstacle, but I felt no connection from Katara at all. And certainly not between her and any of the other characters, which is a major problem for one of the main cast. Her and Sokka felt like strangers half the time, like they were getting to know each other as much as we were getting to know them. I swear Azula’s actress was reading off a teleprompter the entire time, she was somehow robotic and overacted at the same time (I’m sorry, I know that’s harsh, but she just isn’t a good actress, at least not in this).

Zuko had some really solid moments, his scenes with Iroh in particular were great, but overall I didn’t love him. A lot of people seem to be upset at his “tantrums” but honestly I think they fit the character well, though there was one or two too many. He’s an extremely troubled teenager estranged from his family and home, tantrums make sense. Again, I think the dialogue really got in the way of his potential and I don’t think he pushed his acting range enough. Almost every actor needed to show more emotion in one way or another.

Aang has some of the best moments and some of the worst. I have a lot of respect for young child actors, especially ones taking on the challenge of such a massive beloved character or franchise. It’s a lot of pressure for someone still growing up and learning how to be his own person. He handled the few childlike moments Aang was given so so well, he has the brightest little smile and playful attitude. The disconnect came with his more serious moments, he’d get these long monologues and, like Azula, sometimes seemed like he was reading off a teleprompter. I do think it’s a character he’ll grow into really nicely though as long as the writing lends itself to that.

It’s very important to remember that the director signs off on everything. Every performance, every scene, every script (that is also signed off by the lead writer). If something is off, it is not strictly the actors’ faults and should never be treated as such. Do the actors need more experience? Sure, but they more importantly need better direction, scripts, and support from the crew than what they’ve gotten. I’ve seen interviews with the main cast and they all seem wonderful with a lot of potential, particularly the actor for Aang, so clearly the director and lead writer are the ones that are slacking.

Characterization (of the main cast)

Aang

He goes through no change or character development from the beginning to the end of this season.

His water bending training hasn’t even started and he has no further control of the avatar state, so power wise he’s remained completely stagnant.

He constantly says how important Sokka and Katara are, because they’re his “friends”, but there’s been no bonding or development of their relationships. If they didn’t tell us so often, I wouldn’t even think they knew each other beyond first day of school ice breakers.

His most profound moment was his conversation with Gyatso in the spirit world, which I actually really liked. I think he really needed support from someone who knew him before. The home being deserted when Aang goes back to see him definitely hurt.

It feels like this show really really wants us to hate this 12 year old boy. Every adult or authority figure is constantly yelling or berating Aang for something he didn’t even do, it was an accident he didn’t come home and got frozen in ice. Especially from the avatar spirits who should know for a fact he didn’t purposefully run from his responsibilities. The tone is all off and I’m not sure the writers understand what they wrote.

Aang’s biggest mental hurdle will continue to be his guilt for disappearing, which he didn’t even do on purpose so the guilt is unjustified, at least the amount others are thrusting on him.

He looks confident at the end of the season, but I don’t buy it because he hasn’t earned it, there was nothing that he did or said that showed why he would feel so confident when he hasn’t learned anything and he hasn’t proven himself capable beyond getting possessed by the right spirits.

His reaction and aftermath to the death of his entire culture was very underwhelming. His grief sent him into the Avatar state and then he mutters a bland apology and the others are mad at him for falling apart when he’s literally lost everything and everyone he’s ever known. It’s something that needs to be handled far more delicately and it’s not.

As the titular character, it kinda sucks how sidelined his character development has been.

Sokka

If I had no knowledge of this series going into it, I might assume Sokka is the main character because he has the most developmental moments in the season and is easily the most well written character.

Physically handing over the protection of his tribe, while small, was a profound moment for him because he was not only going against his father’s orders, it was the first step to realizing he could be something more than a fishing boy from the south. Which is pretty much his whole emotional arc.

With Suki, he was able to prove himself as someone willing to learn and better himself as a warrior. He learned too fast considering it felt like they were only there for a day maybe, but they were on a time crunch with pacing.

In Omashu, Sokka found that his hobby for invention shows he has a talent for engineering and being a tactician. These are pretty important traits that make him a well rounded character.

By the end of the season, he’s gone through pretty profound loss and change to become the beginnings of a leader.

He was kind of supposed to be comic relief as well, but honestly to me it was done as a sloppy afterthought and almost none of the humor landed. Not just with him, but with most comedic moments.

Katara

I’m sorry, I’m about to rip this poor girl to shreds, the writing for her was awful.

She has absolutely no personality beyond the thousand yard stare she gets every time her mom comes up. Every emotion she has is weak and downplayed by exposition, she’s mostly passive and has almost no effect on the characters around her (besides Jet sort of? And I guess Pokku during the most boring fight of the show).

She adds almost nothing to the team besides being a water bender. It’s literally her only characteristic beyond dead mother.

Speaking of water bending, she did absolutely nothing to earn the title of master and no one can convince me otherwise.

She learned six moves from a scroll, trained off screen so we have to take her word for it, made one move that she copied from another bender, and never once had a single second of instruction from an actual master. Getting that title when she’s done nothing to earn it is crazy.

Teaching herself with no support or guidance is not empowering like the writers seem to think it is. It’s just lazy and so unrealistic it’s laughable. She doesn’t have any of the training necessary to be considered a master.

Also I just really dislike how every obstacle for her to be a better water bender is a mental one, first with Aang and then with Jet. Like yes, clearly emotional state matters, but it’s still a physical discipline that requires technique and training of which she’s had none of besides pictures in the scroll.

The fact she was so dismissive and disrespectful of healing bothers me too when it’s a very valuable practice. She didn’t stay for that training either, so how is she going to use the oasis water in the future? Oh wait, Katara’s “a natural” which is just so infuriating because she’s barely struggled to learn a thing the whole season. As soon as she’s in a good mood, her bending works just fine. That’s not how learning or mastering a discipline should work.

Sorry, I know I’m getting into ranting, I’m backing off. It’s just such poor character work for someone so important to the story.

Zuko

Episode 6, “Masks”, was by far the best episode and largely because of Zuko’s character work. Outside of that episode, he’s pretty consistently narrow minded and angry which doesn’t offer him a lot of depth. But it’s all packed into “Masks”.

I loved that the 41st division was his crew as it was physical proof of his sacrifice and compassion for life. Obviously his scar is also proof, but seeing the people he saved alive hits different. And the fact that he didn’t try to take any credit is very modest and honorable for him.

However, I wish he had chosen to make the 41st his crew rather than it being forced on him as an additional punishment to his banishment. I think if he had made that choice, it would have showed even stronger resolve.

His moment with Aang in the shed after rescuing him as the Blue Spirit was very well done and showed how hard it’s going to be for him to overcome his father’s influence.

Lu Ten’s funeral was a wonderful moment meant to build on Zuko’s relationship with Uncle Iroh, it was quite beautiful.

Unfortunately, outside of the moments I mentioned, there wasn’t much other opportunity for character growth because it had to be so exposition heavy.

Although he did choose to go after his Uncle instead of the Avatar in Omashu and that’s an important value in family that Zuko has.

I do appreciate that they cemented his ideals around honest and honorable glory, but it did get a little preachy and repetitive.

I think overall he has a lot of potential for growth in future seasons.

Pacing

Whoever thought 8 episodes was enough to tell this story is extremely delusional. Having more minutes does not equal having more time, 8 episodes offers no wiggle room for such an expansive story no matter how long they are. I’m so sick of production companies thinking it’s okay to so heavily compress storytelling, let your characters breathe and give them some time to develop. It’s one thing when it’s something like Queen’s Gambit (which is fantastic, if you haven’t watched it you should!) that only focuses on one person vs Avatar which is balancing four or five main characters, extensive world building, and complicated plots. It’s something that needs time, but is instead rushed so drastically there’s barely any time to comprehend one conflict or character before another one is expositing in your face. Netflix is one of the biggest offenders of this, but HBO does the same. The Last of Us could have used an extra episode or two for Joel and Ellie’s relationship to solidify more (I’m not going to get into TLOU though, so please don’t come for me for this opinion, it’s not the focus and if you want a more extensive review of that, let me know). It feels like writers think characterization and development just happens and they don’t have to take the time to actually write it in.

With 2-4 more episodes, they could have had the time to really explore the things they needed to without overloading on exposition. Ask yourself how much time did you feel like passed between episode one and eight? Did it feel like the few months it was supposed to be? To me it felt like maybe two-three weeks, and that’s not the fault of watching it so quickly. There’s never any indication of how much time passes, which is its own issue, but also ultimately confuses audiences if they have to guess.

Every interaction and conflict is rushed, why are these writers so scared to take their time? If Netflix isn’t offering more episodes, then you need to adjust your writing to compensate, not condense everything like a sardine can and then act surprised when it’s a structural problem. It’s a fundamental issue that affected the entire potential of the show.

Plot

Aang should have, at the very least, started mastering water bending. It’s stated several times in the season that he needs to in order to fully become the avatar and be powerful enough to end the war. That is the overarching plot that is integral to the story. And yet he doesn’t bend a single drop of water the entire show until he’s forced to after being possessed by the vengeful ocean spirit (and when Kyoshi also possesses him, but again that wasn’t him, that was the avatar state). Because of the time skips that’ll have to happen between seasons, he’ll probably do most, if not all, of his water bending training off screen. Which is, say it with me, bad writing!

They kept hinting at the comet but never outright said what it would do or when it would arrive. Not giving any kind of timeline for the biggest conflict of the show is really worrisome for their future plans. I understand they have to allow a certain amount of time flexibility to account for the younger actors aging, especially Aang, which I completely understand and respect. That’s why time skips will happen. But to not give any kind of timeline shows really poor planning.

Also, please tell me if I’m misremembering or if I somehow missed it during my watch through, but I’m pretty sure Team Avatar still doesn’t even know about the comet, what it means, or when it’s coming. That’s a pretty big thing to overlook when it’s the catalyst for the Fire Nation’s power.

The fact that the show kicked off with the genocide of the Airbenders, who are all conveniently in the same spot, and Aang just happened to escape it because he essentially went for a walk to clear his head and got caught in a storm that came out of no where is way too coincidental for believable circumstances. It’s, louder for those in the back, bad writing!

They had four years to plan this all out, I don’t understand why it all seems so unfinished and thrown together with pieces from different jigsaw puzzles!

Comparisons to Source Material

In this section, I will be comparing the Netflix adaptation of ATLA to the original animated series. This will be about things that stuck out most to me as consistencies, changes, and valuable moments in each rendition of the story.

Consistencies

Writing-wise, obviously they got a lot of the big plot points down, and I’m not going to list them all. If you’ve watched both, you know what they are. Pretty much the essentials…sort of. The great divide even got a shoutout which I thought was funny.

I mentioned above how “Masks” was by far the best episode of the Netflix season, well it’s not a coincidence that it also has the most parallels and consistencies with the episodes it was based on (“Storm” and “Blue Spirit” which are also arguably the best episodes of Book One). I was going to be so mad if they took away the Blue Spirit part of Zuko’s character, but clearly it’s a fan favorite and for the most part I think they did it justice.

I loved that they kept in a lot of the hybrid animals, at least in dialogue if we didn’t actually get to see them. It would have been a really easy thing to just get rid of for simplicity sake. I hope we get to see some more CGI versions of these animals because the ostrich horse looked really good. Momo and Appa for the most part looked good, sometimes a little wonky but nothing crazy, I just wish they had more screen time. They don’t feel like characters yet, just a pet and a vehicle (essentially).

I was really pleasantly surprised to see Hei Bai, I was honestly expecting them to scrap him. He looked really cool too. I do wish we could have seen him turn back into a panda when Aang helped him, but overall I’m just glad we got him at all.

I didn’t love what they used him for, but Kho was visually amazing and everything I hoped for. Absolutely terrifying, will haunt my nightmares again.

June was also a pleasant surprise, I hadn’t looked too deep into the cast list and wasn’t sure if she’d be included. I did think it was a little weird she was flirting with Iroh vs the other way around (like what was the point of that? just take out the flirting entirely if you’re going to be weird about it) but overall she’s pretty much one to one the same and I still liked her a lot. Nala should have been a little more anteater/mole-like instead of wolfish but overall not bad at all.

We got the Cabbage Man. They teased him a little a first, but we got him.

My Favorite Moments from the Netflix Version that Change or Expand on the Original

I sang its praises above, but again Lu Ten’s funeral scene was just so beautiful and really built on Iroh’s fatherly affection for Zuko. I know it’s mostly a replacement for the leaves from the vine scene in “Tales of Ba Sing Se” because they’re never going to be able to fit in that episode. So it’s nice that they deemed it a moment worth capturing in a different way.

I’m not going to reiterate exactly what I said above so go see Zuko’s characterization again if you need to, but making the 41st division his crew members was a constructive choice that I liked a lot.

I don’t know why but just the idea of Gyatso sticking around in the spirit world to be able to speak to Aang one last time hit me so hard. I absolutely loved it as an addition to building their relationship. Aang always deserved a goodbye, and even though this wasn’t exactly that, it was what Aang needed to cope with his immense loss and the pressure he was under.

When Iroh was arrested by the guards of Omashu and being taken to the pit, he had a really intense but moving interaction with one of the earth bending soldiers. I think it was such a good way to portray war and perspectives from both sides. The soldier rightfully and angrily blamed Iroh for his brother who died at the siege of Ba Sing Se, which Iroh was responsible for. He accused Iroh of being evil, of having never gone through loss, which we as viewers know isn’t true, but he doesn’t say anything. Doesn’t defend himself. Doesn’t reveal his own loss to get even. He takes the abuse and the blame and just utters that enough people have been hurt. Great performances all around, really solid writing. I wish more of the show had followed this example.

That lady hitting Zuko with a brush to stop him from attacking Aang, a child, in Omashu’s marketplace. That was one of the funniest scenes in the whole show. Bring her back!

“Everything I need is on this boat.” - ‘nuff said.

Major Character Differences (I’ll try to keep this concise)

Aang

He lost the majority of his lightheartedness which made him so lovable in the first place. He does a lot of monologues and speeches to intense music now. He’s still 12 guys, let him swim with giant elephant koi and dress up as Pippinpaddleopsicopolis the Third to get into Omashu!

I really don’t like that they changed him actively running from his title and responsibilities to just going for a jaunt with Appa to clear his head. That removes so much depth, guilt, and fear that he should have. In the original, it was his choice to run away with the intention of hiding and never coming back, in the Netflix version, it was an accident he never came home. That’s a massive character change.

People called him a coward, but he literally isn’t when it was a very coincidental accident that forced him into the ice in the first place rather than his choice to actively run from his destiny. He’s yelled at and screamed at and insulted constantly, even by people who are meant to help him, when he didn’t even do what they’re accusing him of. He didn’t deliberately run away, he accidentally got caught in a storm. And he just takes all of that guilt and blame and anger from everyone when he genuinely did nothing wrong.

Getting rid of his crush on Katara is a problem, but I’ll get into that more later.

I don’t care why they think they did it, but making Aang agree with Pakku in any respect about not letting Katara train or fight was so extremely disrespectful to both characters.

His reaction to losing his people was way underdeveloped, they gave him no time to grieve. And the fact that Katara doesn’t help him out of his initial Avatar State spiral is so damaging to the friendship they’re supposed to have. Their friendship always came first, let them interact and build that relationship!

Sokka

His small sexism arc that everyone is up in arms about. Do I think it should have been included? Yes. Is it the end all be all of his character? No, like I mentioned above, he got the most character moments in the show. But it was really important in its own way. I saw someone say, “Sokka may not be misogynistic, but Netflix’s ATLA adaptation certainly is.” And they’re right.

What I really didn’t like was what they did with his relationship with his father and ice dodging. Sokka had a great relationship with Hakoda built on trust, mutual admiration, similar tactical mindsets, and strength of character. He passed his ice dodging test with Bato with flying colors. There’s no reason to completely flip those dynamics, there’s already enough other conflicts to explore without giving Sokka daddy issues he didn’t have in the first place. Whoever made that choice was projecting hard.

Hakoda eventually trusts Sokka to lead the invasion in Book 3, but none of that exists here and it doesn’t feel like there’s a path yet to lead to that. (I have a lot to say about the invasion later)

They have Sokka take over a very paternal role with Katara instead of her being maternal, and he is constantly very overbearing, patronizing, and talking down to her as if she has no (or does not deserve a) mind or agency of her own. They (as in the writers) are acting like the age difference between them is 10 years instead of 1-2 years.

Also taking out the very important moment when Sokka was the one who saved an entire Fire Nation village from Jet was just wrong. Not only was it an important stepping stone towards leadership and diplomacy for Sokka, but it also showed that even on the “bad side” of the war, there are innocent people who deserve protecting.

Sokka wasn’t nearly as funny as he should have been.

Katara

Everything about her was wrong, scrap it and try again.

She had none of the passion she should have had. Katara gets mad, she yells and insults and waves her arms around to make her point. She gets jealous and petty. But she’s also so unbelievably kind and caring, she’s the only reason any of them take proper care of themselves. She’s lighthearted and fun when she can be, she plays and laughs and cares so incredibly deeply.

Katara inspires people in a way none of the other characters can, although Aang does learn a lot from her in that regard. She’s incredibly hardworking, loyal, and dedicated to those she loves. And yes, she feels immense pain and sadness for her mother, but that’s not all she is.

LA Katara felt like a hollow shell 90% of the time used for exposition, 5% mom trauma, and 5% sort of emotional. The writing just didn’t lend itself to complexity, flaws, or character depth.

She’s one of the first well written and well rounded female characters a lot of us encountered as kids and they stripped her of everything that made her who she is. Someone for young girls to look up to. It’s shameful.

For some reason they made her explicitly and directly responsible for her mother’s death, which is a very strange and damaging change to make that I don’t think they totally understand the difference of from the original.

They took away all of her maternal behavior, which just tells us what they think of maternal behavior, that it’s a weak trait for a leading character and not worth exploring in a person that had to take that role in her family and village as a whole at such a young age. It’s like the writers thought that Katara being motherly was problematic and sexist, which is a mindset that is itself problematic and sexist.

They’ve essentially turned bending into a magic that relies solely on emotional and mental stability instead of a martial arts form requiring discipline and training. I don’t even think the writers realize they’ve done this, which in and of itself is a massive issue.

Although I will say the water whip on the flaming arrow was a good use of water bending, it just didn’t feel earned to me.

For as much as they focused on her mom, they never once brought up Katara’s necklace?? They took out Pokku’s connection to Gran Gran and never mentioned anything about betrothal necklaces. There’s just so many changes they made, large and small, that feel pointless or contradictory to the source material for no reason.

Zuko

Frankly, so early into Zuko’s character arc, there isn’t a lot of difference here. Most of his development starts in Book 2. I do like the animated version a lot better, though. I am biased, but I also think that even though they hit on almost all the same points, the original just handled it with far more nuance, care, and time. With the Netflix version being so rushed, any payoffs we had just didn’t feel totally earned.

I do think it was a big shame that they had Iroh kill Zhao instead of allowing Zuko’s attempt to save him from the ocean spirit. It’s a pretty important character moment that shows how Zuko wants to help people, save people, if he can regardless of how they’ve treated him. They can make this point again if they do “Zuko Alone”, but I’m honestly really scared they’ll cut it.

Having Zuko fight back during the Agni Kai against his father in the flash back was way out of character and takes away from the severity of the punishment and the trauma of the abuse. He was a 13 year old child terrified of not just disappointing his father, but of suffering harm from the one person he should trust most. And Ozai convinces him he deserves it, so there’s no world where he would have fought back in that scene. And it changes the meaning from a father violently burning a child that has surrendered and begs for forgiveness to a soldier winning a one-on-one battle against another soldier and branding his victory, no matter how dishonorable it is.

Also, at this point, Zuko is an amateur fire bender with barely any experience or progress in his training. Him getting the high ground over Ozai for even a second is ridiculous and diminishes Ozai’s skill level. It could be argued Ozai did it on purpose to give Zuko an opportunity to prove himself as ruthless as Ozai wants him to be, but that completely goes against the precedent set by Ozai that he hates being questioned or otherwise made to look weak in front of anyone. I think I understand what they were going for, but honestly it came off as an opportunity to show off the actor’s fighting skills rather than holding the weight it should for the story.

I DO like that Zuko has a war journal (*diary*) about the avatar, history, and essentially a map of his journey. I DON’T like that Team Avatar uses it as an expository tool and excuse to not properly explore the world and learn things for themselves or through other people.

I don’t think Zuko said the word “honor” once, but please correct me if I’m wrong.

Iroh

Similar to Zuko, they hit a lot of the same surface level points with a few misses here and there.

They didn’t show us Iroh’s connection to the spirit world, they just told us right before the battle at the North Pole and we’re supposed to believe it, which we do because we’ve seen the original, but that was kind of lame. (Not including Roku’s dragon was also lame, but I digress).

They expanded on his past in a few different ways which I did like a lot and mentioned above.

The Netflix version comes off more preachy and gimmicky to me than wise, which is disappointing. I think the actor could have done amazingly with the right script.

They didn’t show him redirecting lightning, which is arguably one of the most valuable skills in the entire show and extremely important for the finale for both Aang and Zuko.

And just like Sokka, he was not nearly funny enough.

Bumi

His characterization was all backwards and wrong and I hated it.

Visually, his makeup and design was pretty good, but that’s the extent of any positives with the Netflix version.

Bumi would absolutely never ever ever have made a joke about the genocide that took Aang’s entire people. That was disgusting and disrespectful to Bumi and Aang.

He was never mad at Aang for disappearing, he was actually extremely understanding and only hoping to teach Aang further about his duties as the avatar. He quite literally welcomed him back with open arms.

The way he treated others, especially his servants, was appalling and borderline cruel.

He never stepped down from protecting his people or became complacent in a way that put them in danger, Omashu was thriving beautifully under his care. When he surrendered to the Fire Nation in Book 2, it was the best way to protect his people without bloodshed and he knew he’d eventually get their home back. He was literally waiting for the Solar Eclipse to do it (which I’ll touch more on later).

This also means that by having Bumi actively fight and lose, instead of surrendering with neutral jing, he won’t be able to realistically give Aang the advice that is supposed to lead him to Toph. Wait and Listen.

I did appreciate the lesson he was trying to convey to Aang about the difficult choices that wartime forces on us, especially leadership (like who gets what food or medicine), but they did it all wrong.

Shame on the writers for what they did to Bumi’s character, I could write an entire essay on everything they screwed up just with Bumi.

Suki

They made her into a lovesick day dreamer instead of the strong warrior and leader she was meant to be. She’s going to go off to war, don’t diminish her strength. Her being a fighter should be the forefront of her character, not a lonely girl pining for a boy and dreaming about the big world.

Her and Sokka’s relationship should have been built up over time, their kiss was so misplaced. When not much time passes before Sokka falls for Yue, it makes him seem like a player.

And that moment Suki’s staring at him shirtless is cringy and yucky, they’re teenagers. Don’t do that.

We’ll see how she is when she shows up again…I actually liked the actress quite a bit, but her writing wasn’t good. That seems to be a theme here though.

I do wish her hair was still auburn instead of black, that’s personal preference though.

Gyatso

They did him so dirty with his death, it was anticlimactic with none of the power or savagery that was implied in the original. His skeleton was literally surrounded by dead Fire Nation soldiers, I wanted to see that dangerous potential on screen and am very disappointed not to get it given how explicitly they wanted to show the genocide of the airbenders.

Jet

Jet’s vendetta is specifically against the Fire Nation. On some level I do believe he would resort to violence against a traitor giving the Fire Nation information, but I don’t think he ever would have put Tao or other innocent (non-Fire Nation) bystanders at such great risk. Maybe that’s splitting hairs though since in the original he was prepared to drown an entire village, of Fire Nation people specifically, as a whole he felt pretty consistent.

I just don’t like Netflix smashing so many plots and characters together, they deserve room to breathe in their own stories.

I hate that he was the catalyst for Katara’s bending training though, instead of her own hard work and practice or training with actual masters. Jet knows nothing about bending or how it works. It’s another instance of stripping Katara of her skill and work ethic.

Yue

As a personal preference, I hate that they made Yue a water bender. She has part of the spirit of the moon in her, so logically I understand where they’re coming from giving her those abilities. But she’s not a water bender! The spirit was working to keep her alive, not to give her powers she shouldn’t have had in the first place.

She’s a princess dedicated to her people and wanting to learn how to lead but also buckling under the pressure of expectations, particularly around her arranged marriage. I saw none of that in the Netflix adaptation, except that she likes to make desserts when she’s stressed, so there’s that I guess. It’s just still missing the depth, but again they don’t have time to really explore these topics.

They make a point with Pokku about the role of women in the Northern Water Tribe and yet somehow Yue is allowed to just call off her arranged marriage. That’s a pretty distinct cultural contradiction. It just shows me the writers don’t know how to portray misogyny as a narrative tool or how to do consistent world building.

Her wig looked awful.

They should have used what happened to Momo (which ouch, that wasn’t necessary) as an opportunity for Katara to prove that she knows how to heal, because she hasn’t done it yet and she’s supposed to bring Aang back from the dead in Book 2.

Azula

I appreciated her introduction scene where she exposes a coup against her father while undercover. It was a little cheesy with her reveal, but it does establish her character decently well early on. And the cover she chose, dead brother and mother, is really interesting narratively.

The writers for Netflix went off about how they didn’t want to portray sexism, through Sokka specifically, but then they stripped the main female leads of most of their agency (Katara, Suki, and Azula all fit this category, I’m worried what they’ll do to Toph).

Azula has almost none of the arrogance that she should have, certainly none of the calm calculated intensity that made her so fearsome and intimidating. Azula should be scary, and she’s definitely not here. She just came off as such a brat with a twitchy face and prone to tantrums.

Her fire isn’t blue, that bothers me a lot. Blue fire is hotter than red fire, it’s supposed to be an indication of not only her fire bending strength but also her temperament. Plus it’s supposed to help us differentiate between their powers when she’s fighting Zuko.

Lightning bending requires so much skill, precision, power, and focus. I don’t believe for a second Netflix’s Azula should actually be able to do it. She was only able to do it because she was mad, and that’s not how it’s supposed to work.

She definitely didn’t earn being able to overpower Bumi and takeover Omashu. Although granted it feels like they nerfed a lot of Bumi’s power, he certainly doesn’t feel like one of the most powerful earth benders in the world.

Ozai had originally sent her out to collect Zuko and Iroh, not to lead an army in a battle against one of the greatest (or what should be one of the greatest) strongholds in the Earth Kingdom. It’s unrealistic and silly. And it’s not like Bumi gave up like he did in the original, he literally said “We’ll be ready to fight” when he revealed that the Fire Nation was headed their way.

Ozai treating her like a nuisance is also way out of character. He’s supposed to feed into her ego and inflating all of her more dangerous traits because he sees them as powerful and necessary for the future leader he expects Azula to be. Zuko should be the disappointing son with no faith or support from Ozai, and Azula the gifted prodigy given every opportunity and surpassing Zuko in Ozai’s eyes. As Zuko said, “He used to say Azula was born lucky, I was lucky to be born.” Somehow that dynamic has almost completely switched and Azula suffered the most from it.

She’s very miscast, the actress was awful. I’m sorry, but not sorry enough not to say it.

Ozai

Ozai should despise Zuko, he’s far more terrifying that way. It’s way more compelling watching a son that’s been so manipulated by his traumas try to win the affections of his father that don’t even exist than the same daddy issues we see in almost every movie or show where the son is trying to live up to his father’s expectations unhappily. Ozai should have no expectations for Zuko, that’s the difference. He sent Zuko on a mission he wouldn’t come back from on purpose, to get rid of him.

That’s terrifying, how disconnected he can be from his son. Trying to make Ozai more human or sympathetic by making him care for Zuko takes away from the monster he’s supposed to be as a villain. They’re not making him more complex, they’re making him more generic.

I just kind of generally don’t like that they’ve revealed so much about him and Azula in Book 1 because part of the well written structure of avatar is that the “villains” escalate from season to season, going from Zuko to Azula to Ozai as the main antagonists. I’d rather they had kept that structure and given more time to better plot and character development.

Plus revealing him so early took away a lot of his intimidation factor for me. Mystery and intrigue is good you guys! You don’t always have to lay all your cards on the table right away.

And at the end when Ozai more or less says that the attack on the Northern Water Tribe was a distraction to take Omashu makes zero sense to me. Not only is it an arbitrary copy of what Sozin said in the beginning about attacking the Earth Kingdom as a distraction for killing all of the air benders (which is also stupid), but thematically and structurally it doesn’t make any sense. The timeline doesn’t add up at all, not that they gave us any indications of timeline. And at this point in the war, the different nations, tribes, and kingdoms are so segregated that the Water Tribe probably wouldn’t have gone to help Omashu in the first place, certainly not in time.

Also I refuse to ignore the blatant contradiction they put in Zuko’s scar story. Zuko is punished extremely severely for INDIRECTLY insulting Ozai, when he’d literally been asked what he thought of the war plans, but when Iroh DIRECTLY questioned Ozai in front of the entire court and spectators (interrupting the Agni Kai, a sacred type of battle in the Fire Nation), there’s no punishment at all. I really don’t understand what the writers are doing with the amount of contradictions.

Roku

Botched, I hated what they did to Roku.

Trying to make him funny? That, right away, ruined his character entirely. I won’t ever be able to take him seriously. He would never make jokes when Aang is desperately looking for guidance and understanding. He’s not a funny silly character, it’s like the writers forgot to add in some levity and chose literally the worst character to force humor onto.

Roku is one of the coolest and wisest characters in the series with some of the most badass scenes and they took away all of them. The future of his portrayal does not look bright.

Kyoshi

Now, I love Kyoshi as much as the next person, but she got way too much screen time.

Not only did they give Roku’s badass possession moment in the Fire Nation Temple to her for absolutely no reason on Kyoshi Island, but they made her the leading influence of Aang’s spiritual journey (he’s constantly trying to reconcile with the advice she gave him) which makes zero sense.

The hundred year war is the consequence of Roku’s legacy and mistakes, it has literally nothing to do with Kyoshi. Roku should be the one mentoring Aang spiritually and guiding him through the remnants of his choices as the Avatar.

Giving her weird future vision for the attack on the North Pole was really weird and made no sense to me, and completely shifted Aang’s motivations from learning water bending (which he never does even once) to warning the Northern Water Tribe, which they end up not even needing him to do because they’re already prepared to fight. Just a convoluted mess narratively.

She isn’t supposed to be that agro of a character, she’s pragmatic and diplomatic. They based her off the memes far more than her source material and it shows.

Making Kyoshi so much more prominent feels like such an insincere thing to do for the sake of “girl boss strong female characters hoorah” that ultimately hurts the writing.

Kuruk

I don’t really know why they decided to give Kuruk so much screen time when it should have been given to Roku or any other character for some development, but I would say it was a decent portrayal. Just an unnecessary one.

They actually used book material for him, which is surprising given the changes they made, but it was specifically for the “spirit killing knife” which was stupid and no one can convince me otherwise.

Having spiritual conversations with so many of the past Avatar’s this early on feels like they’re going to be removing, or at least drastically changing, the Lion Turtle scene in the finale which has me very concerned.

Egregious and Potentially Detrimental Changes from the Original

Removing Jeong Jeong and Aang’s First Experience with Fire Bending

Aang’s terror of fire after hurting Katara when he got too confident is vital for his development. It’s the main reason he eventually accepts Zuko as his fire bending teacher because they both struggle with having hurt people and wanting to fix their mistakes.

This was also supposed to be Katara’s first use of healing, which again I think is something really important for us to actually see she can do. Because all they’ve said is she’s “a natural” just like everything else and that’s such bad storytelling.

Jeong Jeong is a member of the White Lotus and a really important factor in Iroh’s endeavor to take back Ba Sing Se in the finale. Could they do it without him? I guess, but it’s really disrespectful to me to just not include him.

Taking him out will affect plots all the way in season 3.

Not only that, but Jeong Jeong is a valuable example of someone born on the wrong side of the war wanting to make a difference and change his ways. It’s realistic nuance for war!

What Seeing Wan Shi Tong in the Spirit World Means to Me, the Implications for the Library, and Consequences

Wan Shi Tong, similar to Tui and La (the moon and ocean spirits), came to the physical world with the express purpose of bettering humanity. He made the personal sacrifice of staying away from the spirit world so that the human race would have access to his vast and wonderful knowledge. He couldn’t go back and forth between the physical world and the spirit world because he had to be there to keep the Library standing in the physical world in the first place, it can’t stay there without him. The fact that he’s in the spirit world, to me, means that the library may not be in the physical world at all.

Other indications that his library isn’t in the physical world are that Zhao didn’t get his knowledge of Tui and La from the library, he got it from ancient Fire Nation scrolls and records instead (which doesn’t make a lot of sense), and the sun dial that Sokka would have used to discover the solar eclipse and begin the plan for the invasion is now located in the Fire Nation instead. How is Sokka going to learn about the Day of Black Sun now for the invasion? (There’s a lot of setup for the invasion that they’ve screwed up and I’ll talk about it more in a couple other sections).

So assuming we’re no longer going to have the library, there’s a lot of follow-up implications and consequences. This means that we won’t have Appa’s kidnapping which causes a few problems.

One, Appa’s kidnapping directly leads to Jet’s death, the only major on screen death (or injury that leads to death) in the entire show. I guess you could also count Combustion Man, but Jet’s was infinitely more emotional and important to the story.

Two, Appa’s kidnapping and subsequent rescue is vital for proving to the Earth King that Long Feng is a traitor and the Dai Lee has been compromised. This leads to the Earth King trusting Team Avatar’s word implicitly about the Kyoshi Warriors which allows Azula to infiltrate, learn about the invasion plans, capture Katara, and ultimately “kill” Aang at the end of Book 2. Can the writers work around this? Probably. Do I trust them to? No.

Three, protecting Appa is how the Kyoshi Warriors get overpowered by Azula in the first place and Azula is able to infiltrate the Earth Kingdom in disguise. It’s how Suki is captured and ends up at The Boiling Rock prison.

Four, Zuko being the one to let Appa go is a massive character moment as he struggles to let go of the burdens that Ozai pushed onto him to capture the avatar at all cost to others and himself. It leads to his “metamorphosis” as Iroh calls it, leads to him giving up the Blue Spirit identity, and is what makes his later betrayal so painful. Plus, Appa likes him now which is a stepping stone later for Aang to trust him when Zuko wants to switch sides.

And five, Appa’s brief stop with the guru as he’s trying to get back to Aang leads to how Aang gets any instruction on controlling the avatar state. Which also leads to his “death” at the end of Book 2 when he tries to reopen his chakras like he was taught during the fight with Azula. Again, do I think there’s a workaround here? Yeah, but I don’t think they’ll do it well.

Where’s Haru and What it Means for the Future

Removing the “Imprisoned” storyline takes away Katara’s first and one of her most important moments of being an inspirational leader, learning how to speak up for others, and how to make connections with people outside her culture. But they’ve already stripped Katara of so much of her depth, I’m not surprised they took it out.

The more important issue is that Haru, his father, and their people (all Earth Benders) that she helped rescue were very prominent foot soldiers for the invasion in Book 3. Where are they going to get alliances to build an army against the Fire Nation now? My bet is either they won’t, which is concerning for many reasons, or it’ll happen between seasons off screen which is a massive writing problem! Vital events and plot points happening off screen shows extremely poor planning.

Indications of Removing the Swamp and More Poor Planning for the Invasion (are they cutting it out?)

I’ve pretty much convinced myself that the writers are cutting the invasion out of the plot. I’ve listed many reasons above why I think that’s the direction they’re going, but the last straw was when Sokka and Katara were in the spirit world.

I’m almost 100% sure they’re getting rid of “the Swamp”.

When Sokka and Katara are in the spirit world, they are confronted by their worst memories and most difficult emotional obstacles the same way they had been in the original when they were in the swamp. It wouldn’t make any sense to do that again, so they’re probably getting rid of the swamp entirely.

Which means Team Avatar will never encounter the Swamp Water Benders, which then means they lose even more foot soldiers and allies for the invasion. That’s two major allies that just won’t be involved. Between the potential changes to the Library, the lack of allies, and the fact that Hakoda has no trust in Sokka as a warrior, I don’t see how they’re going to realistically be able to do the invasion. If they do, I’ll be shocked and skeptical of how they manage it.

And as another personal pet peeve, taking out the swamp also removes another facet of water bending, being able to control plants by the water in them (which additionally leads into blood bending).

Other Changes That Really Bothered Me

Exposing the Genocide of Aang’s People and the Comet in Episode One

While I did appreciate (to a degree) getting to see the attack on the air benders and how the fall of the Air Nomads happened, I really don’t like that it’s the first thing we see. Like I mentioned earlier, it’s okay and often more beneficial not to reveal everything right away! I much preferred getting bits and pieces as we went along to put together the whole puzzle and have the time to process each new facet of the war. Giving it to us all at once and as the first thing we see takes away so much intricate story telling.

I really didn’t like that all of the air nomads were in the same place for the attack, that’s so unrealistic that they had to create an arbitrary festival to make it happen.

Originally, the Fire Nation attacks all four Air Temples with the power of the comet to back them up for the initial attack. It shouldn’t take one night where they’re all conveniently in the same place (except Aang) and kill them all, it should take one night to deal them such a severe blow that finishing them off over the next few years is easy. Because of course some would get away and were hunted down, that���s how war realistically works.

Removing Aang’s Crush on Katara and What it Means

Oooooh this bothers me for so many reasons, but I’ll try not to be too crazy about it.

I don’t know why they got rid of it completely, unless they’re just waiting until Aang and the actor are a little older for it to be more appropriate. But with what they did with the “Cave of Two Lovers”, I think they’re scrapping the love between Aang and Katara entirely.

Which they haven’t done anything to help them bond at all as friends in the first place except like two moments of bending instructions from Aang and a lot of dialogue about how they’re family. Aang and Sokka have had way more bonding moments together, I can believe they’re friends at least.

One of the biggest issues will be, if they somehow manage to trick Netflix into letting them adapt Korra as well, Aang and Katara’s kids and grandkids are fundamental to the plot there. But that’s getting way ahead of ourselves, let’s just focus on ATLA.

Aang’s feelings for Katara are very important, particularly for being the sole reason he stops trying to master the avatar state, only to attempt it again later to protect her, and then he ends up “dead” for it. He admits to loving her out right in those episodes.

The thing about Avatar is almost every detail is valuable in some way and dominos into a larger plot point. Their love for each other isn’t a major focal point of the show but it does matter, I just really hope they’re not planning on changing love interests.

Moving Anything from Other Seasons into Season One

I’m not going to spend a lot of time on this, but bringing anything from other seasons into season one when you already have such limited time is really irritating because that time would have been better spent on actual character development or including more vital points from season one.

Changing Lore

Aang accidentally bringing both Sokka and Katara into the spirit world with him just because they were in close proximity is ridiculous. He shouldn’t be able to do that. It makes much more sense that they’d be stolen by Hei Bai than piggybacking off Aang when neither of them are spiritually inclined.

Making Avatar shrines the only way for Aang to access his previous avatar is so limiting and irritating, he gets better at it as he becomes more spiritually connected to the avatar state (like in the ocean during the first episode of Book 3 when Aang contacts Roku, or on the Lion Turtle when Aang contacts four past Avatars). Also they completely contradict this rule letter in the season when Aang sees Avatar Kuruk for a few seconds just outside in the Northern Water Tribe. Like they specifically said it, and then completely contradicts themselves, that’s a pretty big consistency error when it’s a change they made.

They removed any significances of the solstices. Once again, giving us no timeline or indication of time passing in the world.

The reason Roku is able to control Aang’s body and powers as much as he can in the Fire Nation Temple is because of the winter solstice when the veil between spirit and physical world is thinnest. But now any Avatar can do it as long as Aang connects with them at their shrine. Kyoshi should not have been to do that to him and it replaced Roku’s very profound moment at the temple.

I don’t like that they said Tui and La are only in physical form one night a year (I think that’s what Zhao said, or something about an ice moon, whatever), and then that night just happened to be near. I can’t think of a single reason why they would make that change. There’s just too many convenient coincidences happening in this version of the story. Tui and La specifically gave up their spiritual forms for vulnerable physical forms for a reason, learn the lore!

The special spirit killing knife was stupid. I don’t know if it’s in the novels and I missed it or if the writers (more likely) came up with it, but it’s seems like really convenient and silly lore that actively contradicts a lot of what was originally set up about the spirits. And added a lot of unnecessary exposition that didn’t even tell us how Zhao got it.

In another similar vein, the MacGuffin of the statue of the many faces goddess spirit that Aang took from Roku’s artifacts to save Katara and Sokka from Kho was just so weird to me. He just eats people now? What happened to him stealing faces if you show an emotion? That was what made him so terrifying, and it was just another moment they stole from Aang and showcasing his potential. It wasn’t his negotiation skills or his self control that saved his friends, but a very convenient object just sitting on a shelf waiting for him.

None of their lore changes made sense or had a purpose to me other than to arbitrarily be different from the source material.

Mature ≠ Graphic

The writers said repeatedly in interviews and articles that they wanted this live action adaptation to essentially be a more mature version. They even likened their vision to be something similar enough to appeal to Game of Thrones fans, which to me was a massive red flag going into the show. Please, do not mix up maturity and graphic violence.

The only thing more “mature” about the live action is that we actually see people being burned alive and killed throughout the season. The original has far more mature writing because of how delicately and intricately it handles very serious concepts. The Netflix writers either do not trust audiences to pick up on subtle and complex ideas, do not trust the actors to portray subtle and complex ideas, or they do not know how to write subtle and complex ideas. Or some combination of the three. Everything is exposition, which I’ve said so many times before, but I will keep saying it until they learn not shove plot right in our faces with no nuance.

The writers simply think they’ve created something more mature because it’s sometimes violent and not a cartoon, which isn’t how that works.

It’s not mature, it’s graphic. Know the difference and you’ll be a better writer for it!

Humor

Yes the humor in the original leans a little more childish, but you don’t solve that by stripping the humor entirely in the adaptation! Almost any attempt at humor, to me, felt like an after thought and was mostly misplaced in a scene (like with Roku, I’ll never get over that). Just overall lost a lot of the whimsy. I understand that animation lends itself to way more expressive, cartoonish, and childish humor, but there’s plenty of funny live-action films and shows. Why did it have to take such a back seat? Again, that’s not a sign of maturity, it’s a sign of a very surface level understanding of how writing works and of what the original ATLA had to offer.

What Was The Point and What Could They Have Done Instead (imo)?

Being brutally honest here, I really don’t think there was any point to making this live action adaptation, especially with the limitations they put on themselves. I think it was, overall, a waste of money and resources. In theory, it was really exciting to have the opportunity to see the world come to life. And in a lot of ways I think they accomplished that between the location designs, costumes, respectful and accurate casting, and environments. I just think that was their main focus, making it look right, that the writing took an unfortunate back seat that made the whole show suffer.

There are two directions I think they could have taken instead.

One, I think they should have planned for six seasons. Every book of the original has a roughly mid season event that could act as really solid season finales. They would be able to stretch out the story and not compress or rush their writing so much. It would be structured more like this:

Season 1 Finale - The Winter Solstice and Discovery of Sozin’s Comet

Season 2 Finale - The Siege of the North

Season 3 Finale - Getting to Ba Sing Se and The Drill

Season 4 Finale - Aang’s “Death”

Season 5 Finale - The Day of Black Sun Invasion

Season 6 Finale - Sozin’s Comet and Confronting the Fire Lord

I understand that doing this doubles the length, and subsequently the cost of the show, which is a big ask. But I also think if they don’t have the resources to do it right in the first place, then they shouldn’t have done it at all. Is it better than the 2010 version we got from Shyamalan? Of course, but please allow yourself to have higher standards than literally scraping by the bottom of the barrel of quality.

I don’t expect anyone to have as in depth opinions or critiques as me, and I don’t begrudge anyone for enjoying the show or even liking some of the changes! But I will say that we all, no matter how critical a viewer you are, deserve better than mediocre quality.

The second direction I think they could have taken, and I really think they should have, is to write something completely original within the world setting of Avatar. There are quite literally dozens of avatars that existed before Aang that have no story yet! They had an opportunity to write some original that actually fits into the 8 episode limit they had while also further expanding on the history and world we all love so much.

I just think the audience, that mostly consists of fans of the original, would have been far more accepting and open to an original story rather than a middling attempt at retelling a story that’s already so beloved.

If you made it this far, I am extremely impressed and also worried for your health! This was mostly me needing to get all of these thoughts and critiques out of my head without ranting to friends and family that have no idea what I’m talking about and would get annoyed.

Anyway, that is my very extensive review that nobody asked for! If you need clarification or further analysis on anything I said, or if there’s something I missed that’s a critique for you on the live action, or if there’s anything you disagree with that I’ve said, please let me know in the comments below! But be nice, I will block anyone being mean about people opinions or thoughts. This is an open friendly space, I won’t tolerate bullying.

Thank you for probably far too much of your time!

[ace-antagonist-writes]

Maybe someday soon,

Word count: 3.7k

Summary: After your team’s plans literally go up in smoke, a tense car ride leads into a much tenser situation with a certain natural disaster. (Vash and Reader are both hopeless romantics)

A/N: First actual post on this acc and I’m here to help clear out my Trigun brain rot, might make a part 2 if anyones interested. Also, I wrote this with the OG/ Badlands designs in mind but you could probably imagine other Vash to this as well! (this is also unedited since i hate rereading my own work-)

.

.

.

You’d think it was deadly for a human to run this hot. Maybe it was and maybe you’d drop dead from embarrassment if this would continue, who was to say?

The day had started any other way it had for the last few months. A lone desert horizon staring back at you as your little caravan traveled to a nearby city to take refuge before nightfall hit. Boredom hung over your head like a cloud of dust, so you began to look sound in the small enclosure. The van was high-strung with bated breath, the tension a cough away from popping poor Meryl’s temper. If you hadn’t been so terrified of the feisty woman, you could’ve snorted at the red vein barely visible on her cheek from your backseat angle. Desperate to find something else to focus on, your eyes drifted to Milly in the passenger seat blissfully unaware of the situation. You flashed her a smile when your eyes met in the mirror and she happily returned it before spacing off again on who knows what.

Now here came the hard part.

It was a wonder the silence had managed to dwell so long with the noisy blond and priest sitting beside you. Perhaps the two brain cells the three of you seldom shared–one of which you held on to the longest and the other bounced between the males– sparked together and formed a quiet game of who could outlast Meryl’s rage the longest. Nevertheless, your confidence held strong as you looked to cast a glance at Wolfwood in the opposite window seat. He was turned fully to the window, wispy stripes of dark hair obscuring most of his profile and hand holding up his chin. Thinking you were in the clear of not breaking into laughter looking at him you flicked your gaze onto the window.

Oh no. The two of you had formulated the same idea and were now staring at one another’s blank-faced reflection in the window. The dark tan of his skin pinched together and furrowed at the crease of his nose, clearly taken aback by the reflection as he struggled to re-straighten his face. You quickly turned your head as conspicuously as you could and placed your forehead on the warmed glass. A hearty smile had slipped its way across your face, what a goofball. It was embarrassing how attached you had gotten to everyone in such an objectively short time. Even with the scoldings included, you never once lost any amount of love for any of your friends. There was nothing you would trade for moments like this, despite having grated on Meryl’s nerves the entire morning before now. But to be fair, it was a bit of her fault as well for carrying a humanoid typhoon across No Man’s Land for this long. Insurance company be damned if you were in her place, the amount of times you’ve almost gotten stitched up would’ve put you into early retirement long ago.

….Speaking of the Humanoid typhoon,

Snapping out of your pondering state, you came to realize the silence had strangely returned. You glanced to your left, trying to spare a peek at your agitated driver to see if she was still ill-tempered. You got you answer with haste as her eyes raced to meet your curious ones peering at her through the side mirrors of the vehicle. It was like the devil himself snagged your heart out of your chest as your eyes spasmed trying to grasp at anything else within your range of view. How was someone barely up to your shoulder so scary?? The peeling leather of her seat is what dragged you back away from her wrathful glare, and even then you could’ve sworn the heat from it dug a hole through the sweat of your brow. Maybe it would be best if you didn’t follow your mind’s wonderings and left Vash in the back of your head. Yet as the harsh red of his mangy jacket appeared for a split second in your peripherals, you knew you were a goner. To make things worse, a subtle scraping made itself known alongside the white noise of the van. It was dull and flaky, not unlike the scratching of… a paint brush? Your noise scrunched up in thought as you looked for the source. Milly met you halfway when turning to her, casting a copy of your pensiveness right back as she peek over her shoulder. A honeyed eyebrow rose in a silent question before her gaze shifted up.

A loud clap sent a jolt through the backseat riders up and into a state of alert as Milly slapped a single hand over her mouth. Your own eyebrows kissed the beginnings of your hairline as you reared back in your seat a bit, slowly ascending your head to what she was turning an alarming shade of red at. On the way, you made eye contact again with the equally wired priest across from you. Only briefly sparring a single glance, you both looked up.

You don’t know whether it was due to the unbearable lack of entertainment or if it was just that funny, but only the lord knows how hard of a cacophonous laugh erupted from you either way. Poor, poor tall and lanky Vash sat stiff as a board between Wolfwood and you, caked in soot from the disaster the group had just come from. Wherever the dark graininess hadn’t settled, a brilliant red matching his iconic coat painted his sun-kissed skin. And his hair, the bristled blond strands smushed and sprang outwards, creating the illusion of an angry red pineapple as he slightly swished back and forth with the swaying of the van. Vash looked to be struggling more than you and the priest had–seeing as he had to stare at his reflection through the rearview mirror the entire time since you all had. However, all hell had broke loose upon your cracking up as Vash and Wolfwood burst into cackles and hollering. Tears poured out of all your eyes, soaking dried and dusty faces previously chapped from the heat. And if you had any sense left, you would’ve looked to see the expression on Meryl’s face beside the giggling Milly. Unfortunately, you didn’t get the chance and had to live on without knowing the exasperated smile inching across her face.

——————————————————-

.

.

.

"Why am I the only one in trouble?!" You found yourself wailing into the dark night as you trudged to the bar. "They laughed too Meryl!"

The woman's stride never paused as she walked in front of you with her back straight. Meryl scoffed back at you and dished out a single glance, "But who laughed first?"

"But-"

"Besides! We need someone sober enough to find the motel, and that will surely not be me after the little stunt you guys pulled in the last town!” She huffed a piece of her dark fringe away from her eyes and took a sharp turn, “I pray they weren’t set up with the company’s insurance plan, if so, this might be the last drinking session we can afford.”

You’d have to admit even though she was joking, you felt a little bad for Meryl. Maybe thats why for the rest of the way to the bar, you quietly sulked in front of the batch of traitors behind you. The two bubbly blondes and sleek priest were quiet as mice up until you all entered the bar– trying to camouflage into the darkness to avoid getting a ban on their drinking as well. Yet as soon as you all set foot in the bar, all four of your comrades hauled themselves to the bar and sparked the whole atmosphere of the room.

It was endearing in a way, even though you were a bit bitter you couldn’t be drunkenly stumbling over your words as you chatted the night away. But also if you had, you wouldn’t have been able to be fully enamored by a blond “maniac” who had managed to convince an equally drunk patron to dance with him on a table. You brought the back of your hand to your mouth and stifled the laugh building up in fear of being dragged up while sober enough to remember it happening.

However, all was in vain as you met a pair of teal downturned eyes looking straight at you. Vash was clearly plastered, but somehow managed to start working his way to you without stumbling out of his boots. His laughter made your brain work overtime to keep up with your heart running like a bat out of hell. You were certain that someone could hear the noise as you frantically darted your eyes around to divert your attention away from Vash. The drunken man was not even a foot away from you when he tripped on his way to you. And you could swear for a split second, a brown pair of dress shoes was the object in question. The blonde, dazed and confused, limply fell forward and clung to you tightly. You could’ve died at that single moment.

He was warm, and not in the way the sands were. It was such a comforting warmth that your mind blanked when he had wrapped his arms around you. The noise from the bar faded into a dull hum as Vash fully engulfed your senses. His right arm slightly twitches around you, as if trying to pull you impossibly closer. A rhythmic thumping pulsed inside your chest, and you prayed that he wouldn’t be able to feel it through layers of clothes and burning skin. Your breath hitched as he grazed the side of your neck, slowly moving up and stopping just below your ear. You were sick with anticipation and he slowly opened his eyes to look at you before speaking,

.

.

“I really have to use the bathroom.”

Dear lord.

So here you were, holding up a blazing hot Vash who was thoughly struggling to find the ground beneath him. You tried not to look at him too long–you fear if you did you’d let him fall in the chilled sand after the stunt he’d pulled earlier. Your face was still scorched with the heat of embarrassment that should’ve been drunkenness. Nevertheless, you trudged forward and led the train of dazed insurance company workers, a buzzed priest, and a totaled outlaw. It seemed everyone lucked out since the walk wasn’t long at all, the rickety building coming up just short of 3 minutes away.

You reered your head around to shout the news, earning disgruntled groans and a half-hearted cheer from Milly. Old and tired wooden boards wailed underneath yours and Vash’s feet as you both stepped up at the same time. He losely threw his right arm out to reach the door handle, and even though he missed it by a wide mark, you appreciated the effort. Soft lights brighten and illuminate the small motel lobby as you all piled in. The front desk attendee was a pleasantly aged woman, gray wisps spiraling from under her hat and kissing the faint wrinkles of her forehead. You gave an exasperated smile as you lugged Vash forward, “Reservation for Stryfe?”

“Stryfe you say? Okay my dear, let me just look and see-” She leaned forward a bit towards the registry booklet, “Ah! There it is, let me get your keys sweetheart.”

You nodded as you felt a slight tug on your sleeve, glancing upwards you come face to face with a teary-eyed pout. A single brow of yours hitches up, signaling him to continue with whatever he was trying to get at.

“...I need to use the bathroom again.”

“You just went!”

“Please!!” The lanky man twisted you around the best he could, “You don’t want my bladder to explode do you??”

You bit your tongue to not mutter a yes and send the blonde into a crying fit, instead slamming your hand over the first key you saw presented. With a labored huff you turned to Milly, currently the least drunk of the trio bracing themselves against the wall, “Mills, you think you can manage getting you three to your rooms while I’m gone?”

To which she reply with a lazy salute and a “You can count on me!” before grabbing two other keys and darting off with Meryl and Wolfwood draped on her shoulders. What a sweet girl.

And now to deal with your not-so-sweet outlaw that you hurriedly pull to the room where he would be staying. You’d nearly dropped and lost the key in hand when he dramatically clutched his stomach and shouted in the long hallway. Scared out of your skin, you turn to him in fear he actually wasn’t playing with you earlier about the bladder situation; but were met with a sly smile at the shocked expression displayed on your face. You huffed and tugged at him again, trying not to indulge in his antics. Undeterred, he let out another shrill yell as you dragged him closer to his room,

“HELP, HELP! It’s Vash the Sta-mmph!”

You slap a swift hand over his mouth and shove him into the newly opened door, locking it behind you. Red-faced, you shoot a dead glare at the spindly man currently splayed out in front of you. Vash’s lips twist into a playful wobbly smile as he stares up at you, only to shapely point downwards when you point to the bathroom door. His eyebrows crease his sunburnt skin in a sad attempt to imitate a kicked puppy–yet he relents and gives up when a vein makes itself present on your temple. Well after he’s settled into the bathroom, you lean against the wall to catch your breath for a brief second. How in the world was he this hopeless? You’d have to give it to him despite how agitated you were at his earlier stunt, his hopelessness was endearing in a way. A tired hand swiped the sweat from your brow as you flush faintly, god he would be the death of you. A muffled thunk from the other side of the bathroom door rips you from pondering about the culprit at hand. Hopefully Vash would be competent enough to figure out how to survive on his own until daybreak. You push off the wall and leave the room, starting off back down the hall to claim your room key so you can finally retire to bed.

The walk was ten times short without dragging drunken extra luggage on your shoulder throughout the halls. You stop at the front desk, which was now missing the woman attending it just a few minutes ago. It was eerily silent in the lobby, with no one being up and lounging about the area. At a sudden creak, your head swivels to a door not far away from the desk. Seemingly oblivious to your figure standing awkwardly behind the table, the young man glides to a drawer obscured front desk. He pulls out a booklet resembling the registration sheet the kind woman had checked form. The new attendee acknowledges your existence with a sparring glance,

“Name?”

The suddeness of his statement was enough to spike your nerves, “Ah! Oh, registration for Stryfe please! I’m here to pick up the fourth key?”

His eyes narrowed for a split second, “Four? There’s only three in the registry for Stryfe.”

“What?? Surely there must’ve been a mistake, there’s five of us with two sharing a room!” You mentally made a note to hide Meryl’s handover medicine if what the attendee said was true, that you would have to bunk with a clingy blond for the night. The man behind the counter just sighed tiredly at you,

“I’m sorry, but we don’t have any more openings left for the night. You’d have to sleep in one of the other reserved rooms.”

Your ears burned with embarrassment, “Can you at least tell me the other two room numbers?” Maybe you could bribe Wolfwood with the promise of another pack of cigarettes in exchange for a room to yourself.

Unfortunately, the attendee had made it his momentary pleasure to crush your pipe-dreaming. He slowly blinked at you, “Are you Meryl Stryfe?”

“...No?”

“Then I am sorry, we cannot disclose room patrons without consent of the booker themselves. Have a nice night.”

“You’ve gotta be joking me.”

“Not paid enough to do so, unfortunately.” He looked a good decade older as he muttered the statement to you through gritted teeth, “Have a nice night.”

And with that, your one-sided argument came to a close as you had no choice but to secede. In all honesty, you could pass out in the hallway and call it a day with all the walking going on. You wish you knew why this felt so nerve racking, he was your friend and the same went for you—or at least you hoped. Yet, the blonde had such a baffling way of turning your whole world upside down without even trying. It intimidated you just as much as it made your heart flutter. He was so breathtaking, enough to piss you off in a jealous haze if you weren’t his friend. You were set in stone on this revelation, and nothing would be able to shake that away from your perception of Vash. The door knob contrasts your warm palms as you open the frigid door.

Upon opening it, the world seems to instantaneously freeze when you come face to face with a half-dressed outlaw. You didn’t even have time to truly process his reaction, and dignity be damned at this point. Your eyes nailed themselves to Vash’s torso like they were meant to be there; and if you were actually cognitive, you would’ve chastised yourself for staring so shamelessly. But in all honesty, could you be blamed for looking?

Yes, you were hurt by the mangled skin of his body with pink skin coating the sunny canvas of his chest. And yes, you knew somewhere in the back of your mind you would shed tears for every one of them you hadn’t saw happen admits your journey together. But dear lord above, was he ethereal. The lankiness you normally associated with him was heavily disproven from what you could clearly see now. He was sturdily built—even with his arms frozen in a pose reaching for his backpack— and astonishingly lean. There were so many words you wished to say, to voice your unconscious fawning over him. You opened your mouth slowly and dazed,

“Vash, yo-”

“DON’T LOOK DON’T LOOK!” He shrieked out, arms flying up to cover anything they could.

Your hands sounded like gunshots as they collided against your eyes. Stupid, stupid! Everything that had echoed dully in your brain crashed together in a cacophonous tragedy as you came to your senses. And by the sounds of it, Vash found himself in the same predicament. Audible thrashes and shrill “eeks!” were the only way you could tell he still remained in the room. He quieted down a bit as he rummaged through his bag—for a shirt you predicted. There was no doubt in your mind he was sober from your shared mental breakdown, albeit one was far more vocal than the other. You felt ashamed in your actions, and were no better than a peeping Tom!

You scrambled to make an apology, something to atone for the embarrassing act you just committed against him. But before you could, he beat you to it.

“…I’m sorry you had to see that, I really am, it’s not a pretty sight and I’m sorry you-”

“That wasn’t what I was thinking at all,” You exhaled. “I was thinking about how pretty you were… in the…moonlight?”

It came out as a doubting question but the words you spoke couldn’t be any truer. Vash was extremely beautiful, far more than your words could ever tell.

…Meanwhile, he looked at you like you had just shot him in the foot at point blank range. His cheeks were a hazy flush and his eyes darted around your face crazily, looking at every single feature sitting upon it. You slightly shrunk under his intense surveying, a bit confused on what he was doing.

“Sooo, are you gonna say som-”

“YOU LOOK PRETTY TOO!” He jumped to cut you off and leaned forward a bit to accentuate his profession. The blush sitting on his cheeks flowed bashfully to his neck and chest—at least what wasn’t covered by his loose shirt— as he shifted nervously. “In the moonlight as well, I mean.” A cheeky smirk appeared after he spoke, as if he hadn’t fumbled as hard as you did.

What a tease.

“Is that why you were looking at me so hard? You liked what you saw as much as I did, hm?” You leaned forward a bit, mirroring his anxious actions.

“What’s not to like?” Vash’s smirk turned into a charming smile, “Women all across town would want a chance to get with the Humanoid Typhoon, you know!”

“Oh I know alright.” You roll your eyes in exasperation, “So what about me, I got a chance with Vash the Stampede?”

His face blew up in a furious blush again at your teasing tone, you got him. A snickered laugh bubbled from your chest as he tried to come up with something else so that he could win.

You can believe you were nervous to bunk with him for the night, did you seriously forget who he is? The laughter smothered all the attempts he made to make a jab at you, but you couldn’t focus on them anyway. Everything in your mind at the moment was swarming with him instead. Of his genuine laugh, of his jokes, of his lanky arms throwing themselves around you to give you a hug. Memories, thoughts, and words unspoken you always wanted to say just made you giggle all the more at him for just being. With all your heart, you wished he would have the same thoughts as you at least once.

And yet, if you weren’t so oblivious maybe you would’ve seen it.

Another lovestruck fool looking longingly at the one they fell head over heels for.

[prettyboykatsuki]

may i pick ur brain wrt something? you write such a large variety of characters and i think you have great skill in following through with a character's characterization (lol) to their sexual life. i was wondering what do you choose to focus on or how you approach figuring out a character's sexual style (?) when you write? im pretty new to writing smut (i write in general but i usually just fade to black) and im having trouble translating a character's neurosis into sexual acts, particularly when you move beyond the vanilla missionary etc sex (which im not particularly interested in writing even tho i think it can be emotionally poignant in its own right).

what i have most trouble with is like figuring out if a certain act fits character a or character b in my ensemble, say, and then moving through with that. i've been trying to approach it like fighting styles bc of the character's physicality, but there are certain temperamental and moral tensions informing fighting in particular (as a deliverance of violence, i mean) that make it hard for me to pinpoint how to translate that to sex without it feeling shoehorned. for example (and this is just for reference), i have a character who's like a gunslinger and whose style is very explosive and wild and a little bit cocky, but when u look at it under the microscope, his approach is polished and precise and meticulous. and THEN his internality is of a young man with a lot of anger and stunted growth, who really just wants acceptance and affection deep down, and who is so very tired. now i can translate each of those things and its combinations a hundred thousand ways, but which is correct? or faithful to him? at one point it all seems unfathomable to me. and then bc i can't make up my mind i fear everything i write ends up being too plain, or ill-fitting, and because my cast is large, it also all ends up feeling too same-y. has this ever been an issue for you?

first of all - i want to say thank you for entrusting and believing in my writing abilities enough to want to pick my brain about this. i'm not entirely sure what the appeal of my writing is to other people (not in a negative way but more in that its my own stuff so im always critical of it) but i put forth a lot of thought in characterization and translating that into sex as i am primarily a smut writer so while im not the most confident u should come to me for advice, im deeply flattered and will do my best anyway

i'll be real though, the best advice is genuinely just not to overthink it and go with your gut. have some faith in your own writing voice and ideas etc. but anyway

there are a lot of layers to this question and i'll do my best to go through it bit-by-bit. and i don't know if this will really help you since it might come off vague

if i can offer you any advice on characterizing well in a smut scene, it's to not view the smut as a separate entity to your work but as an integral part of it's infrastructure. do not treat the smut scene as part of the work, but as a pillar of it.

the other thing is understanding what is personally compelling to u or arousing about this characters storyline or personality. and not arousing as in physical lust, but what concepts tickle you and make you want to write.

the truth is there's no objectively correct way to characterize a character especially if they're nuanced and complex. which is why all writing is subjective in a sense.

ultimately, it's your job as the author to choose what characterization you like best and convince the audience it's the correct one.

for example, the character you're describing is multifaceted. there are several ways you can take the direction of the story

their outward persona is being a cocky gunslinger who is inwardly polished, meticulous, sensitive and tired. all of these traits can be expanded upon into sexual acts based on your will as the writer - so you have to ask yourself, what aspect of this character is the most arousing to you as a writer or what is this sex scene intending to display about a character. what trait of theirs are you hoping to highlight through sex?

to translate these things into sex gets really tricky and is honestly something you have to experiment with until you feel it click.

for me - if i were attempting to write this character, the breakdown process would look something like this.

this character has a personality gap of being a cocky gunslinger but is actually polished and meticulous

this means they they are likely concerned with appearances.

something in their past must've brought them to that conclusion. if they are continuing to outwardly project themselves as a reckless gunslinger - it is is likely not their "true" self.

what would make a character with this many defense show their true selves, or what other characters cause this character to demonstrate to their true selves?

the translation process of eroticism can go in a hundred different languages. if i personally were writing this character, i might pair them with an older mentor type of character, or a nonchalant rival. i might put them in a situation that requires a different kind of vulnerability and forces them to expose some of their nature for the sake of their ideals

as an author, im aroused by the idea of them showing their submission and affectionate side. trying to subconsciously appeal to authority figures might be interesting if i'm trying to demonstrate their lack of validation. the opposite can also be true, that a character like this might resent mentor / authority figures that impede their own ideas and trying to highlight their anger. writing this gunslinger lashing out at a fellow gunslinger they respect can easily be turned into erotica.

you could pair this character with a nonchalant rival type. a direct opposite that challenges a characters morals ideological belief or perhaps - understands them through their differences. this rival character pays enough attention to the gunslinger to know that they are polished and special. while they are rivals, there's something legitmate in their dynamic to this sensitive, tired character who puts up a facade and wants to be understood.

your own arousal as an author comes in here and where you have to make choices.

lets say then, i go with the latter. i would then structure the story or chapter around this idea through by demonstrating the push and pull of their relationship. i would subvert this characters personality through the framework of submission and a desire for acceptance. i'd write the erotica about the slow crescendo to sex with their rival who seems to accept them fully. i'd write about their different meetings, choosing small things to represent larger themes. maybe their rival praises their technique or offers them a listening ear. i use those small moments to build up to the intimacy and weave the erotic stuff into the story itself so when the sex comes it feels gratifying and releases tension (lol)

for the actual sex stuff you just have to go with your gut and distinguish things based on what traits you're showing. maybe this characters need for affection and rest makes them a whiny bottom. as a writer, i'd monopolize that. i'd point out their eagerness to please through desperation like kissing or nuzzle, and i'd have their words contradict their actions to display their personality gap etc

for me being structured around erotica means going through that kind of mental process and and building a story framework from the ground up and aiming for a proper sex scene. the erotica process is weaved into the plot mechanisms, the metaphors, the stories ideology. the smut is the point, and every action is central to emphasizing what is going to end up happening. my better examples of this lately are probably uncle sukuna rip

ive been writing smut for long enough now that i do not struggle with it and it's easy for me to come up with a unique character voice and do all the above sort of automatically in my mind. and i know it can feel intimidating.

the best advice i can give you though again is don't overthink it which ik seems contradictory to all of the above advice. but sometimes you just have to let yourself go with the flow and believe in your own abilities. trust your gut and just shoot straight ahead.

i hope this was bale to help u some!!

[writefullyrobin]

No spoilers past 2x10 if possible folks!

2x01 – Under Pressure thoughts

OK. Wow. New season and there seems to be loads to unpack with just the first episode!

Let’s start with the two new characters!

Firstly Maddie – her intro was downright hilarious! Buck expecting Abby and finding his sister in the shower instead was not on my bingo card. I have a younger sibling myself and the idea of not being in contact with them for years just makes my heart ache. She’s definitely running from her ex-husband who even with just one phone call I would happily throw him off a cliff. He sounds like a real monster and I bet he looks attractive and unassuming because the worst monsters can always hide in plain sight. I’m super glad she’s here. And played by Jennifer Love Hewitt!! I love JLH so much. Ghost Whisperer was one of my favourite shows back in the day. Buck having some family around this season could be fun. He felt very adrift compared to the other’s last season and I just put it down to him being in his mid-twenties and having bounced around a bit as some people do at that age.

I love that Maddie is going to work at dispatch! I had wondered how they were going to deal with Abby’s absence because I loved seeing the dispatch side of things last season, so I’m really happy we’re not losing that. I also absolutely loved that she called attention to the fact that Abby’s tour of Europe definitely involves her banging other guys. Sorry Buck.

Secondly Eddie - *side eyes* did they seriously play “Whatta Man” for his introduction? I agree with Chim, he a very beautiful man and I appreciated the shirtless scene. And the slow mo… this scene gave off such “new love interest has arrived” vibes (the man was shirtless, if they didn’t want to emphasise how attractive he is, they wouldn’t have done that). And it ain’t for Bobby or Hen. Our two single boys are Chim and Buck, and Chim didn’t have any weird jealousy vibes going nor did he do a turn with a heavy camera focus on his rection to seeing said new guy which leaves… Buck?!

Who was so jealous of Eddie’s place in the team he genuinely didn’t seem to know what to do with himself. And I get it. Buck worked hard through season 1 to earn his place (and earn it he did) and to have someone who has just graduated from the academy be so competent must have been a little frustrating.

Their first big rescue together though… wow. All you could see flashing through Bobby’s mind was “oh my god, there’s two of them”. It was a speedrun to a brilliant partnership. (“we might end up real close” – is that foreshadowing rearing its head?)

I’m leaning towards the idea that Abby’s role in Buck’s life has been split between Maddie and Eddie – Maddie for the professional job and Eddie for the love interest. Time will tell if my guess is right but Buck was so prevalent in both their intros it would make sense.  

Also, what sort of historical expert doesn’t know the difference between live and practice rounds?!

The big leftover plot from the end of season 1 is Bobby and Athena and I might’ve squealed when she kissed him against the fire truck! I was so happy to see they’ve kept that going and they seem to be going strength to strength! Athena has some fears, which is justified. It’s scary moving forward and being together outside that cosy bubble they’ve built up. I loved Michael’s little pep talk for her. I’m relieved their friendship is still good.

I adore Chim and Hen’s friendship and hope we see more of it this season now Buck might’ve found his own partner and Chim no longer has a rebar through his brain(!). Her submitting a proper photo of Chim that showed him as the hero he really is was just so sweet. I’m really happy he got picked for the calendar.

And what was that ending?! Oh yeah, earthquake everyone! Oops sorry, it’s the end episode! Cruel!

[mollywall-e]

Was there a specific reason that you fell out of the CR fandom? I can't put my finger on what it was for myself, but I'm feeling the same. Kinda wish i could pinpoint what it was just so it would mean that everything else is fine

C3 burnout is real.

For me, I think it’s a couple of things!

I’m really struggling with connecting to the story. I’m much more of a character driven person, and I feel like lately the campaign has been very mission/task focused with less time for character development/moments.

This makes things difficult because we’ve known “the big bad” for so long, it’s lost its sense of mystery.

Tuning in week after week when I’m not dying to know what’s happening next is hard! Especially since their content is SO LONG. I work full time and can’t watch live. Once I get behind, it’s really hard to catch up!

I’ve fallen out of C3 for long stretches before, until something major happened and I’d get inspired to pick it up again! I’m hopeful that I’ll get back into it at some point, but I’m not gonna stress myself out about it.

C2 got me through COVID and C3 got me involved in the fandom in a way that I’m so thankful for! I’ve loved writing fic and making friends in discord servers. But right now, following the show doesn’t spark joy and that’s okay. Rather than cling to CR with a white knuckled grip, I’m allowing myself to set it aside and follow the dopamine. It’ll still be there when I’m ready to come back to it.

Interests come and go, intensity fades. There’s nothing wrong with that.

On a more personal and homosexual note, I’ve also found myself falling into a new hyperfixation that’s consuming 95% of my brain’s CPU.

If any other struggling critters are looking for a new show, I can’t recommend The Loyal Pin enough. It’s a Thai GL on YouTube. The show is centered around their relationship, and it’s so beautiful. Period drama, friends to lovers, well-written, well-acted, stunning cinematography. Think Bridgerton, but actually gay. Yes, it’s as steamy as Bridgerton and the chemistry between the actresses is unreal, unmatched. Plus there’s a lot of focus on the Thai culture and history, which I find super fascinating!