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#its getting to depressing lmao
genderjuicee · 1 year
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hate when ppl only view being autistic/adhd/neurodivergent as a bad thing
bc yes i will have a breakdown if it is to loud or a noise is to high
but also the other day i listened to a song and it triggered the happy chemicals and spent thirty minutes jumping around my room and spinning and stimming and it was literally the happiest ive ever been in years
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aroaceleovaldez · 3 months
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tbh my latest biggest theory for why HoO and onwards is such a dramatic drop in quality and consistency is just. Rick stopped making teaching guides.
Like, the Lightning Thief teacher's guide is SUPER in-depth with even stuff like sources about middle grade child psychology and exact specifications of where he's applying that, explaining what different character's goals/motivations are, their dynamics with each other and their environments, etc etc. Even specifying which specific myths certain plot elements are supposed to reference or be about.
That stuff just doesn't exist for later books. There's activity guides and smaller, significantly more simple teacher guides for later books but they don't go into anywhere NEAR the same level of depth. The TLT one is a full lesson plan that breaks down the book at every level and explains what's going on and more or less why Rick did that. The others are all basically just glossaries of terminology and some simple question guides.
And they didn't even use the TLT teacher's guide for the Disney+ show because they clearly aren't adhering to any of what's discussed in that breakdown of the book.
By creating a teaching guide alongside writing the actual book, that's forcing you to document what you're doing, why, your sources, and information about your characters and the story they're in. It's like an even more in-depth version of a series bible. But that's lacking for later books (and etc) and it shows because that level of thought and depth and attention just isn't there anymore.
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hoshinasblade · 1 month
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loving hoshina soshiro means being content of being his mistress because he's married to his blades and his first love will always be his anti-kaiju duties. he could love you to hell and back but in the end you won't be able to compete against his responsibility to serve as vice-captain of the third division. it's not that his affection for you is lacking, but it will never be enough to put you on top of his priorities.
the fic is here.
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hayaku14 · 2 months
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thinking about shinichi actually confessing and getting together with ran despite being a whole ass child like that's so embarrassing for kaito, my dude you need to step tf up, a whole child somehow got to start dating before you 😭
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zebratimw · 1 year
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Spirit animal SQH
#svsss#shang qinghua#but mainly I'm just here to vague post LMAO I don't like to vague post its not very effective in terms of venting but#but basically I guess I'm becoming hyperaware of my like... cognitive dissonance codependency and derealization ee#also my general laziness ig and where it overlaps into executive dysfunction or whatever like I may genuinely have some issues but#I am also a lazy son of a bitch jfjfkgkg and i need to figure out how to figure it out so I can work on both in more effective ways hhggg#oh yeah but basically the thing to remember for later is the silence in the call and the immediate unmute and chat activity once I left#I should remember this and stop interacting I think? I should try to give em space I think I'm being too clingy or something#or maybe my own silence is too awkward and dampens the call? I was kinda just spacing out and not doing anything so I get its kinda weird#LMAO so I should just like try not to be in call for those times mm#I just like being in call with my friends jdhfkg but I suppose its not very good either#I overindulge I suppose another friend pointed it out to me before too haha but fjfjjt its just easier than facing bouts of dread by myself#eehh and that's why I gotta do something about my Metnal Ailneses hfjfj but ngl I don't really know how to go about it...#I get embarrassed looking stuff up djfnfkg and half the time I don't even know what to look up I just draw ?s and I give up#I suppose I also have commitment issues too but that ones not new which is an issue of itself aaaaaaaa#man idk idk I just don't really get it I guess djdjfjf and I've got existential dreads and think maybe it doesn't really matter whats wrong#cause there's no point to fixing them because ultimately I'm gonna die alone and a failure anyways? so like ehfjgkg idk#its depressing and I know its like sabotage cause my brain is being a little silly a little goofy and its not a shared sentiment#with the better half of me and the entirety of my friends but yknow its just ee harder sometimes to believe in the optimism ig#and i can talk about it somewhat normally and without like having a ✨️break down#but yknow djfjgkg I'm very emotional a person ya? I think sqh is relatable for gods sake 💀#irrationality sentimentality nihilism and existential dreads... wanting to die because living is too hard despite all my hopes for living...#just the ol regulars yknow?#and another thing... do I talk to my friends about these things? I vent them out here a lot but what do I really want?#I'm not strong enough to keep it to myself clearly but I'm also too proud to share these thoughts? I dump them out in the open and for what?#whenever someone reaches out with concern and care I don't respond in kind and refuse to elaborate?#so like what do I want with this? I guess I want someone to know I'm going insane half the time I'm awake? but not do anything about it?#that's pretty unfair I guess... and stupid I think I do want to share my thoughts with someone but I'm too scared of the ramifications#and that my pride can't stand the fact I might be looked differently by my friends even tho the image they have of me is already quite silly#man.... idk.... I'll come to conclusions myself and do nothing about them so I guess that'll happen again aah idk idk idk
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spaghett-onaplate · 4 months
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depression is really weird actually wdym i spent 2.5 years of my life in bed
#and wdym that lifestyle changed so quickly into being out and about and an active member of the world??#very proud of myself#and i mean it wasn't that quick of a change#it was like 1.5 years primarily depression bedrotting with occasional school -> primarily depression bedrotting ->#primarily depression bedrotting with 3-9 hours of work weekly -> straight into 31+ hours school+9-12 hours work weekly#so there was somewhat of a gradual progression#but still#also wowza i wake up 7-7:30am every morning now. 1pm was an early wake up for a not so insignificant amount of time#i mean of all fundamental growth years to miss out on the ages like what 12/13-15 aren't too bad? they would suck in a different way if i#had been socially involved#anyway it's just. yea i'm proud of myself but it is a crazy lifestyle change#and even when i was deeply depressed in a horrible routine i feel like i learned a lot. how to regulate my emotions and cope well and find#the joy in everything. bc if i stayed in bed all day then i would at least be happy about the sun or whatever#and for the while of being not at school at all i WANTED to be at school i just could not find one bc our school system is so cute like tha#(basically every school is at capacity and the local school that has a guaranteed place for me would have been an all boys or girls 😭)#but i miraculously found and got into this school and miraculously made it work so well for me socially and now academically#it's also a good time to get back into school for my education bc any later and it woulda been pretty bad for all my certifications and uni#ive missed out on so much maths that its not worth it to me to try and catch up but my teacher knows that#but ive always hated maths regardless i only ever understood it for the first half of yr 7 then my attendance dropped#and after my recent exam i decided to try harder at school. but i still got an A on the exam i didn't study for!! academic weapon fr#i'm just idk thinking back to myself in the past few years#and how hopeless it all felt. but i got out of it!! i beat the depression and social anxiety and found a good place and made the most of it#and during the peak of my depression i remember i went out someplace near my old school and panicked so so badly about seeing#kids from my old school. and the friends at the time didnt really check on me when i went to shake and cry in a side street lmao#i kept the best of that friendgroup and have better friends now. but anyway now i take a bus each morning with some kids from my old school#and you see these hands? they look like they're shaking to you?#anyway yeah it's just cool i got to this point :) i really had no hope for so long but now i have a life i'm living and a future i'm build#--ing towards#which is funny i just decided some random day last november after watching some better call saul 'huh actually lawyer would b pretty cool'#and will i get there? we'll see but i do have hope now
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ghostlyheart · 1 month
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as we approach the start of a new semester i'm sending all the compassion and empathy in the world to students who struggle with procrastination and what I affectionately like to call the Shame Monster that goes along with it. it sucks to always be treading water and feeling like a fraud to yourself and others, especially when it's something you truly care about. if you're always thinking "why can everyone else be responsible and organized but not me," your brain is overgeneralizing. you're not the only person to experience being overwhelmed and stuck. and even IF everyone else balanced their life perfectly, that wouldn't make you a bad person for struggling. if you care about something but keep avoiding it and don't understand why, there is probably more going than you realize. if your physical and mental health are being neglected, then you're never going to be able to accomplish what you want to do because you don't have any gas in the tank. it took me crashing and failing last semester for me to finally admit to myself that i was suffering from some SERIOUS burnout. i had this whole plan for research i was going to do over the summer and all these opportunities i wanted to take advantage of that i couldn't do because i was neglecting to take care of myself. the worst thing my anxious brain told me could ever happen did happen and i'm still alive. i hope that doesn't happen to you, but know you can recover and come back better. also: it's okay to stop wanting what you thought you wanted, or to take a different path than the one you were "supposed" to. don't do things because you think other people expect you to, or because you think it's too late to change your mind. that isn't sustainable. your college experience is for YOU, not for other people. you can do this!
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akkivee · 4 months
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one of the craziest bat bars like actually
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tchaikovskaya · 7 months
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I cleaned my apt thoroughly for the first time in months pls clap 🧍🏻‍♀️
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mermaidsirennikita · 8 months
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sometimes it drives me literally insane to see romance requests that are like
--I want a romance wherein it's basically the happy epilogue throughout the book
--I want a romance that has great communication and they never withhold anything from each other ever
--no "miscommunication trope"
The last thing is just a general gripe about how so many of the things people say are tropes are not tropes, and it's pedantic and snobby but like. Miscommunication is so broad. It's not a trope. People are miscommunicating. WHAT are they miscommunicating about? Is one of them keeping a secret identity from their partner? Because a secret identity romance iS a trope. Is one of them withholding their feelings out of fear of rejection?
Because people DO miscommunicate. Often writers do write it clumsily. If people miscommunicate for no reason, sure, whatever. But if they miscommunicate BECAUSE of a REASON--like, often it's not even miscommunication lol. It's the hero keeping his dire supernatural secret from his wife because she'll die if she finds out (honestly, valid to me, but whatever). It's the heroine finding it difficult to trust the hero with her heart because her dad left when she was young (maybe cliche in theory, but actually a very real thing that happens).
If all you want is plotless nothing wherein everyone is happy and nobody makes mistakes, I personally have a hard time thinking of it as a book, because there is no story. It's just vibes. And essentially EVERY time, people have to mess up and make mistakes in order for there to be a plot.
I just don't understand the point.
#romance novel blogging#if all you want is pure vibes what you want is a short form story or fanfic sorry#you don't want a book#and i'm not saying every writer does miscommunication right--romance has a lot of clumsy writers who just shove it in#(lmao)#but miscommunication is often a backbone in its most broad form of conflict#'i cannot tell you this thing because i am scared for you'#'i cannot tell you this thing because i'm scared of what you'll think of me'#'i can't tell you how i really feel bc i frankly need therapy'#these are all forms of miscommunication and the thing is that when a writer does it well you don't even call it 'miscommunication trope'#but you'll still dismiss miscommunication as bad#the long game by rachel reid is a great example#generally a really well-received book!#ilya gets distant with shane and shane doesn't take ilya's feelings as much as he should#bc ilya has depression and is not telling shane about it#and there is NO REASON for ilya to do this other than internalized shame and a tendency to hide his pain to keep others happy#this is miscommunication!!! they are not communicating well!!! and people still like the book bc rachel reid is a good writer#who knows how to convey this in a way that isn't annoying and is relatable#lol ofc all of this is also symptomatic of the fact that people can't read nuance anymore apparently#and 'character behaves badly = book bad'#(for the record ilya and shane miscommunicate a lot in both books but those books are widely loved bc again rachel is a good writer)
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having a good day is so wild like what do you MEAN I'm not miserable and unmotivated and crushingly apathetic and absolutely exhausted brain fog just want to sleep???
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#rgg#ryu ga gotoku#ryu ga gotoku 7#yakuza series#yakuza 7#yakuza like a dragon#arasawa#masumi arakawa#jo sawashiro#snap sketches#i said i was almost done with this like five hours ago LMAO liar#i keep accidentally typing yakuza 8 and yeah i hope we get 🏳️‍🌈❓❓ flashbacksin that. i hope we get that. <- we will not#heh this is what i was referencing in that In The Tags post.. continuity from me ?? unimaginable..#lowkey inspo'd by the fact that /my/ lighter is only ever good for one (1) light then its just. Dead for some reason#i dont smoke but i do light incense. if you were wondering.#ANYWAY MY APOLOGY FOR PUTTING ARAKAWA THROUGH HORRORS THIS WEEK#ive got nothing but cute things in mind so to quote linkin park No More Sorrow#i keep drawing them in their twenties and thats not a problem i GUESS but it is for me#but Double Good i do only have Middle Aged Shenanigans on the brain#if i try to imagine any Old Man Yuri its going to get depressing so. forrgive me for the lack of silver foxes. im crying too i know#<- forcing myself to fight off that one evil idea i had AWAY WITH YOU. ANOTHER TIME.#let me detox a bit. after i finish comm work of course.....#i feel like i draw cigarette kisses a lot but i dont remember the last time and i havent drawn it recently so Free Real Estate#drawing this reminded me i have therapy Technically later today 'snap how are these related'#cause my first sess my thera wanted me to talk bout myself and i told her i draw comics and goofy shit like this#and she said some stuff my sis would say fuckin 'if it makes you happy its not dumb :)' like OK. WHATEVER. I KNOW.#also dont worry i dont have a therapist for The Brain Demos its just so i get medicine#ok i should sleep. i wanna get comm stuff done before Phone Therapy so byyyyyyeee#im gonna imagine SO many scenarios that ill inevitably share with all of you at some point
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ganondoodle · 8 months
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took painkillers agaisnt my headache, i feel better now lmao
its fine to be critical of your stuff but man do i need to learn how to say just fuck it and go do it no matter how shitty you may think it is, people will always look at me weird for being weird anyway so destroying myself with self doubt about what i do isnt doing me a favor
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d13t0rt10n · 2 months
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Bro how was I like 5 the first time I saw Xiaolin. Why has it haunted me for almost 20 years.
Time passes so fast 😭
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youredreamingofroo · 3 months
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going on insta and being reminded why I never check people's stories ever 😕
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b4kuch1n · 1 year
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done with the current dip pen comm queue (just in time for another Nib Accident too lol. I’m learning how to take care of the tools as well) so uh! it’ll take me two days to get a replacement and get some other stuff done. which means slots will be available again this saturday!
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