#its from his “i tried ghost hunting to see if its fake”

[angrycloudcrown]

That one Danny Gonzalez audio of him going "ATTENTION ALL GHOSTS IN THIS ROOM. YOU ARE GONNA SEE MY DICK."

but it's Toritsuka

[certaimromance]

࣪ ִֶָ☾. Love or seal?

Dean Winchester x Hunter!reader

Summary: An avenging spirit is killing married couples, so the Winchesters think it's a good idea to use you to pretend to be one and take down the ghost. But the act becomes all too real before you know it.

Words: 1,8k.

Warnings & Tags: fem!reader. mentions of murder, death, violence. so much teasing. a little of angst with happy ending. dean from the early seasons but soft and chaotic (a bit simp). sam being cupid and forgotten lol. english isn't my first language (sorry for my mistakes, be kind please).

Note: I've always been a Dean girl and I'm so excited about this. I love the concept of "Frenemies to Lovers" with its more playful and cutie version from the earlier seasons, I hope I described it well.

This is my second time ever writing here, i'm still new.

You took another look in the mirror and walked a few laps around the dingy motel room, trying to swallow the act. It seemed ironic to wear such a fancy dress and high heels in a place like this, but it was all so you could solve the case and prevent more deaths. After all, it was your job to catch the ghosts and put them to rest.

It had been a long time since you'd been out on a date or worn anything other than your usual jeans and leather jacket. Buying yourself a cute dress and wedding rings with one of your fake cards had been entertaining, the closest thing to a normal life you'd had in years.

“Come in, I need help with the zipper on my dress.” You said after hearing a couple of knocks on your door.

You were still standing in front of the bathroom mirror, waiting for Sam to show up to help you so the two of you could leave soon for the restaurant where you both had reserved a table. The strange thing was that the cold hands you felt running down your back and zipping you up were not his, but those of his older brother.

“What are you doing here? Where is Sam?” You turned around to look at Dean once your dress was closed. It was then that you noticed he was wearing a suit and the ring.

“In the room.” He replied, moving closer to you so he could look at himself in the mirror and adjusting his tie with difficulty, he was not used to wearing one at all and felt suffocated.

“Why are you dressed like that?” You asked him after looking him over from head to toe and inevitably biting your lower lip. He looked good, all dressed up and dapper, you could even smell the scent of cologne wafting off him.

“I'll be your husband for tonight.” Dean smiled at you.

You frowned when you heard that the younger Winchester would no longer be your fake husband, because that was not what you had all agreed upon. Sam had always been more husband material, and you trusted him enough to have some physical contact if necessary. On the other hand, you saw Dean as someone who was far from the prototypical perfect partner, and you could barely talk to him without arguing about your differences, never having touched him except for sparring practice or taking away the gun he kept stealing from you. You couldn't deny that both brothers were attractive, but they were almost equally far from meaning anything romantic to you.

“We flipped a coin and I got the job.” He added to the explanation, noticing the confusion on your face.

Finally you nodded, realizing that once again they had not been able to reach an agreement and had had to put luck in the middle for the choice of roles. You didn't mind going with Dean, you had already been on several hunts with him and trusted his skills, but having to impersonate his wife was weird.

“Can you...?” He tried to ask you, pointing at his tie and all the trouble it caused him.

You let out a small laugh at seeing him so confused over a simple tie and went over to him to take it off. You had to tie it all over again because of how badly he had done it before.

“This looks very wife.” He commented as he saw the delicacy with which you were trying to fix his mess.

“I hope the spirit feels the same and is looking forward to slaughtering us.” You replied, taking a step away from him as you finished.

You two said a quick goodbye to Sam and then hopped into the Impala, which took you to a shiny restaurant near the road where the ghost appeared.

“Don't embarrass me, please.” You said to him as soon as you both sat down at the table and placed your order.

“How could I, darling?” He smiled innocently at you and took your hand on the table, caressing the ring on your finger.

You didn't say anything, just smiled back and kept your thoughts to yourself. You couldn't believe he actually called you that, sounding almost like a husband, even though you knew it was because of the acting, it gave you a funny feeling in your stomach. The most you'd gotten from Dean Winchester in all the years you'd known him was a "good job" and a strange smile, followed by a lot of questions about your careless decisions. You alone were far enough away from marriage, let alone someone like him.

“You look very handsome tonight.” You told him as you saw he was drinking water, causing him to almost spit it out in surprise.

Usually you never complimented him, barely looked him in the eye, talked about anything other than hunting, or even laughed at his jokes. It seemed that his presence didn't matter much to you because your interests were more aligned with Sam's and you got along better with him. That bothered Dean a lot, he hated being so invisible in your eyes.

Now, however, you didn't take your eyes off him and even gave him compliments that left him speechless to continue the performance.

“At least the food is good.” You said absentmindedly as the waiter brought the plates.

“And the company?”

You looked into his eyes, trying to understand if he was playing with you or if he was really hurt by your lack of emotion. The strange thing was that you didn't know if it was one or the other, his greenish gaze was a mystery.

“The best company, of course.” You gave him a smile and picked up your glass of wine to make a small toast.

“How affectionate you are now.”

“Yes, I feel almost as if today is the last day of my life.” You said with irony.

Dinner went off without a hitch in a quiet and strangely pleasant atmosphere. You couldn't help but be surprised by Dean's friendliness, it was the first time you had a civilized conversation with him. The first time he held your hand and you noticed how green his eyes were.

Suddenly, everything he said, silly or not, made you smile. The only rational thing to do was to attribute it to the glass of wine he had decided to drink. In general, you didn't allow yourself to drink alcohol, let alone in the middle of a hunt. But now, for some reason, you thought it would help your nerves and relax you a bit.

“Where did you leave the car?” You asked once they left the site and the time to travel the road of death was approaching.

“In the corner over there...I hope.” He answered without really being sure. For him, it had all happened so fast when you two arrived.

“My feet hurt. Don't play with me now.” You said, hating the high heels you were wearing.

At that moment, the hunter stopped and motioned for you to sit on the bench by the exit. Unsure, you obeyed and frowned as he knelt down to gently remove your shoes.

“Happy now?” He asked he asked, holding your heels in his hands.

“I can't walk barefoot.” You claimed, putting on a fake sad face and lowering your gaze to his arms.

Dean shook his head instantly.

“No, don't even think that I'll carry you.” He warned confidently, folding his arms.

A few minutes later, he was silently leading you to the car, snorting at every opportunity to give in so easily to your wishes.

“This looks very husband.” You pointed out with a smile and a teasing tone.

“I would offer you to the spirit right now.” He replied, looking at you with narrowed eyes.

“How lovely you are, my dear.”

The two finally got into the car and headed for the exit. Dean had received a message from his brother telling him that he had found the name of the ghost woman and her grave with her husband, who was the cause of all his resentment against happily married couples, and to top it off, he was buried on top of her.

“Sam is going to burn the grave and everything will be fine.” He said trying to comfort you as he saw the concern on your face. “Maybe the woman doesn't want to kill anyone today.”

“You have too much faith in a murderous spirit.” You sighed and tried to remove the ring from your finger, but it stuck. “And you should take the ring off.”

“Are we getting divorced so soon?” He replied in a joking tone, with his eyes on the road.

You looked at him seriously, this was no time for jokes because everything was going wrong. If Sam didn't dig up those bones soon, they were probably going to kill you both and the plan was going to fail completely. It was supposed to be easy and you were terrified that it wasn't anymore.

“Come on, don't be like that. You were laughing so hard with me.” He smiled at you.

Before you could respond, a pale woman in a blood-stained wedding dress appeared in the back seat. You could barely say Dean's name when the ghost's hand came around your neck and began to choke you. After a few moments, you couldn't even breathe and everything became a blur.

You didn't want to die, at least not at that moment. Not without having lived a life as good as the night before everything went to hell. You still had too many things to do to go like that, let alone in front of him, you couldn't let that happen.

“Don't move.” The hunter said to you before drawing his gun and disputing you to the back seat.

The ghost disappeared for a few seconds and then reappeared just ahead of the road. A braking maneuver as the woman was beginning to burn in front of the two of you almost made you jump out of your seat.

Sam had succeeded.

“Are you okay?” Dean asks, looking at you with concern.

“Yeah.” You said, still trying to catch your breath and process everything that had happened.

“And my thanks for saving you and not letting death part us?”

At any other time, you would have simply made a sarcastic comment and emphasized that it was all thanks to her brother. However, the recent experience had changed something in you and made you kiss his cheek.

Before you could completely pull your face away from his, he put his hand on your cheek and pulled you close. You felt his lips move over yours and responded without hesitation. A big part of you had been thinking about this moment all night and was more than happy it was happening. It was like the perfect ending to a fake marriage date, minus the killer ghost part, and it made you smile in the middle of it.

“You didn't flip any coin, did you?” You asked as you broke away from the kiss for a second.

“No, I didn't.” He admitted, leaving a kiss on your head and making you smile even more.

[shanklin]

In a world where the belief of humans can create gods and deities, Stan dies from an infection soon after losing Ford.

It’s just a minor setback! Or so Ghost!Stan tells himself as he tries desperately to figure out how to touch stuff again. It doesn’t help that Ford warded most of his things against ghosts.

One day while practicing to become corporeal Stan comes across a couple of weird creatures [a gorilla wearing underwear? Unicorn made out of corn? A horse riding another horse? What?] ranting about Bigfoot and how stuck up she’s gotten ever since she ascended to godhood just because some crazy fanatics turned the hunt for her into a cult.

Meanwhile smaller szories and folktales like them are trying their hardest to survive. But peoples belief is fading and soon they will be forgotten and cease to exist.

This changes everything! Stan knows a great business opportunity when he sees it!

It’s almost too easy to abuse the system.

Religion has always been a scam in Stan's opinion. So he might as well turn himself into a god.

Good thing Ford did all the hard work for him by becoming the mysterious science man in the woods. All Stan has to do is to make himself visible long to create Mr. Mystery.

The belief of the townsfolk grants Stan enough strength to become corporeal and soon enough Stan opens his temple [tourist trap] for business. 

People pilgrimage to his holy ground, pay tithings [entrance fees] listen to his sermons [tours] and leave offerings [cash] in exchange for blessings [cheap souvenirs Stan tells them will bring them luck]. They even take little statues of him back home and convert others to believe in him as well. [It's a fun tourist trap why wouldn't you believe the owner exists].

Eventually he even gets his own priests [employees] to help him out.

In exchange for favours Stan also promotes the almost forgotten and fading folktales he meets. They quickly become his most loyal followers. Stan may have scammed his way into godhood at record speed but he still cares for the little guys. He’s saving their lives and they could not be more grateful. 

The other gods however HATE him but cant do anything about it because he's not technically breaking any rules.

With every new believer Stan grows stronger and changes.

His lies turn into reality. His souvenirs become actual blessed artifacts protecting the owners and Stan becomes one with Gravity Falls. Its true protective deity. Time has no meaning and throws up a barrier protecting his home. The same one Ford has already studied in the past.

And when the zodiac fails and Stan tells Bill that that doesn’t matter because Bill will die here, Gravity Falls rumbles with excitement.

Stan spins a story about the deity protecting this land and how they will not allow Bill to break the barrier or harm them any further.

All Stan needs for everyone to do is to close their eyes and pray.

“Stan, we don't have time for your ridiculous lies!”

“Just once in your life do as I say and believe in me, Sixer!”

The people of Gravity Falls have surprising faith in their local conman and so do the kids. With no other options left Ford closes his eyes and says a short prayer.

When he opens his eyes again the world is engulfed in blue flames and before him stands the young form of his brother surrounded by the real life versions of fake tourist attractions.

Stan puts on his holy knuckle dusters and grins. 

[whxre4hange]

hargreeves family & their youtube channel headcanons

op note: guys i have uni tomorrow and i have 50 pages of readings to get through and im doing this instead t-t and THERE WILL BE MORE THIS HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA SO ENJOYYY and if u have any reqs and stuff hmu x

luther: "big guy lifts big things"

luther’s channel is still 90% him lifting random objects, but now he’s started taking requests from subscribers. his latest video is titled “can i deadlift a vending machine full of expired tuna cans?” (spoiler: it broke his toe).

he tried to do a live q&a once, but klaus hacked the stream and kept typing questions like “why are you so sweaty all the time?” and “is it true you’re dating a moon rock?” luther didn’t realize it was klaus until halfway through and was answering all of the questions with great sincerity.

his cooking tutorial series is now called “protein with the pro :D,” and every episode ends with him yelling, “this is fine!” while something burns in the background. 

he uploaded a vlog titled “day in the life of number one” that was just him sitting alone in his room for 24 hours, eating protein bars, and crying over pictures of the moon. fans thought it was satire, but it wasn’t.

diego: "knives out (but worse)"

diego’s channel has devolved into pure chaos. he doesn’t even try to edit his videos anymore—half of them are just him yelling at random objects while throwing knives at them. one video is literally titled “can i fight a toaster?” (the toaster won btw. dont ask how).

he started a series called “knife or not a knife,” where he throws random objects at walls to see if they stick. episode three featured klaus dressed as a piñata, screaming, “i’m not a knife, diego!”

he once uploaded a video called “how to be a vigilante” but got distracted halfway through and spent 20 minutes ranting about why batman’s cape is impractical.

most popular video is a 20-minute rant about why pineapple doesn’t belong on pizza, which unexpectedly went viral (he didn’t mean to post it)

klaus: "ghosts & giggles"

klaus’s channel has somehow gotten even weirder. one video starts with him trying to summon marilyn monroe and ends with him accidentally summoning reginald, who spends the entire video yelling, “seriously, number 4?” while klaus laughs uncontrollably.

every time ben possesses him for content, klaus makes it as awkward as possible by saying things like, “oh no, ben’s making me fart again!” ben hates it but can’t stop him.

he uploaded a 10-hour loop of himself dancing in a fur coat to elevator music while holding an empty wine bottle labeled “ghost juice.” it has 8 million views for no reason.

his fans keep asking for ghost-hunting content, but klaus refuses because he says ghosts are “too clingy.” instead, he uploads videos of himself talking to random objects and pretending they’re haunted (“this spoon just told me its tragic backstory”).

allison: "rumor has it i’m amazing"

allison’s channel is now 50% lifestyle content and 50% her using her rumor power for increasingly dumb challenges. her latest video is titled “i heard a rumor my brother ate an entire watermelon whole,” featuring luther crying while trying to eat the rind.

she once tried to film a morning routine vlog, but klaus kept running into the bathroom yelling, “do ghosts poop???” she gave up halfway through and uploaded it anyway.

her most viral video is called “siblings try asmr,” where five whispers insults into the mic (“you smell like failure”), diego yells directly into the mic (“IS THIS RELAXING?!”), and klaus eats chips so loudly that viewers reported headaches ….and the channel.

she started a prank war with lila by uploading fake rumors about her (“i heard a rumor lila can’t spell ‘knife’”), which led to lila breaking into her house and replacing all her coffee with hot sauce.

ben: "dead but make it content"

ben’s channel has officially gone off the rails because klaus keeps uploading nonsense on his behalf. one video is titled “ben reacts to cheese,” where klaus eats different cheeses while pretending to be ben (“mmm yes this gouda reminds me of my tragic death”).

fans keep asking for serious content from ben, so he uploaded one video called “existential dread: part 1” that was just 30 minutes of silence followed by him knocking over a glass of water in frustration (via ghost powers). fans called it groundbreaking art.

his most popular series is now called “ben roasts humanity,” where klaus narrates ben’s sarcastic commentary on random internet trends (“why are people eating tide pods? even ghosts think that’s stupid.”).

once uploaded a black screen with the title “i’m haunting you rn lol.” fans reported strange noises in their houses afterward, but klaus swears it wasn’t him (it was).

five: "temporal tantrums"

five’s channel has become an unhinged mix of time travel lectures and angry coffee reviews. his latest upload is titled “this coffee tastes like betrayal,” where he screams at a barista for giving him decaf.

he started a series called “timeline fails,” where he roasts historical events for being dumb (“who thought inventing crocs was a good idea? humanity peaked with fire.”).

once uploaded a tutorial called “how to fight yourself in another timeline” that ended with him accidentally punching diego because he got too into the demonstration. diego still hasn’t forgiven him.

his most infamous video is titled “ranking my siblings from least annoying to most annoying.” luther cried when he saw he was ranked #1 most annoying, while klaus celebrated being ranked #2 because he thought it meant five liked him more than luther (he doesn’t).

viktor: "silent but deadly (violin edition)"

viktor’s channel looks calm on the surface—just violin covers of sad songs—but every title is passive-aggressive chaos like “a song for when your family forgets you exist” or “ode to my emotionally unavailable dad.”

once uploaded an hour-long vlog called “my siblings are insane” that was just footage of everyone screaming at each other while viktor sat quietly in the corner drinking tea. fans call it cinema verité; viktor calls it tuesday.

his most viral video is titled “oops i destroyed the moon again,” which features dramatic slow-motion footage of explosions set to classical music while klaus yells in the background.

started uploading cryptic videos with titles like “revenge symphony no. 5” that are just close-ups of his violin strings while ominous music plays. fans are terrified but can’t stop watching.

reginald: "the monocle diaries"

reginald’s channel has fully embraced its accidental meme status. one video is titled “why my children are disappointments,” where he lists their flaws while sipping tea. fans turned it into a remix called #disappointingdadcore that went viral on tiktok.

tried to do an unboxing video for an ancient artifact but got mad halfway through because pogo forgot to bring scissors. and he couldn’t get the tripod working. ended up smashing the box open with his cane while yelling about incompetence.

once accidentally went live while arguing with pogo about bananas (“i told you they belong on the LEFT side of the pantry!”). fans still quote this as proof reginald has no chill.

somehow has 15 million subscribers because people can’t decide if he’s an evil genius or just really bad at being human (it’s both).

lila: "chaos gremlin energy"

lila doesn’t have her own channel—she just hacks into everyone else’s accounts to upload dumb pranks like replacing all of diego’s knife tutorials with footage of herself juggling bananas while yelling, “look at me! i’m number two now!”

once uploaded herself stealing all of luther’s sweaters and replacing them with crop tops labeled “moon boy chic.” luther cried when he found out but wore one anyway because he didn’t have anything else clean.

her most chaotic upload was titled “how many knives can i steal before diego notices?” which ended with diego chasing her around the house screaming while she yelled back, “you’ll never catch me alive!”

keeps threatening to start her own channel called "better than allison," but she gets bored halfway through filming every time and ends up eating snacks instead.

[wjehfshs]

Hope you are having a good day/night

I was wondering if I could request tf 141 boy x male reader who had went missing after recklessly sacrificing themself to make sure the team got out safe either with hostages or information your choice. At the time Ghost and Reader were in a relationship, but with reader going missing getting suck in enemy hands for 3-5 years (your choice) they think he's dead.

What happeneds when they hear about someone killing off enemy forces and possibly having Intel the team needs? What is it turns out to be their missing comrade? Reader's unrecognizable from the scar cover half his face, a missing eye, his vocal cords damaged so his voice sounds different (if you're ok with it maybe a cybernetic arm?) Who would put the dots together first? Maybe reader stayed away knowing they would be hunted and didn't want the people they cared about to get hurt?? Specially Ghost!

Thank you for the request! This is actually a great idea

Reader being reckless and self sacrificial, Ghost X Reader (romantic) reader being kidnapped, reader being tortured, reader having scars and missing limbs (replaced with a prosthetic arm) male reader, mentions of violence. Drug mention once, Ghost being depressed and somewhat having no will to live ☹️

Gore mentions

4 years ago, on a mission, you where being reckless, little care for your own safety, you where trying to get information from the other side about where they had illegal drugs stored, you where killings people left and right, not caring if you where sneaky or not

Unfortunately due to your recklessness you had gotten caught and thrown into a helicopter on the rooftop

Simon saw this and he tried to chase after you but someone attacked him before he could get to you, and everyone else was too far away

They tried tracking the helicopter but it was stolen and they left it in the middle of nowhere and probably took a plane back to base

For months Simon was stressed, they tried so many times to get you back

They just couldn’t find you

After 7 months Soap finally told Ghost it was probably too late

He didn’t wasn’t to believe it but there was nothing else he could do

For the next 9 months he was self isolating, rarely ate, obviously depressed

The others sometimes even heard him crying in his room

They tried to console him but it just didn’t work

They noticed he was also more violent on the battlefield

You where all he had, of course he loves his friends but you where the love of his life, the only one who he felt safe letting hold him

Everyone else he flinched away from but you, he felt warm in your grasp

That’s why he grieved for so long, he lost his only will to live

After more time passed he finally came to accept it, of course he still loved you but he knew he would never see you again

One day, they heard from Laswell that someone had attacked the opposing side, killing them in mass numbers.

Simon immediately knew something was up, he could just feel it in his gut

They had been sent off to the base to see what was going on

When they got there it hit them how many people actually got killed

“Bloody fuckin’ hell” Simon commented

“Out of all my years in the military, this is probably the worst case I’ve seen” Price mentioned

The base that they where at also manufactured high tech material such as guns and… prosthetic limbs. They noticed one of the rooms holding fake, robotic arms had been broken into, one arm being ripped out from its holding spot

They walked around a bit before they heard a crash

“Sh, there could still be someone here” Price whispered before he snuck towards the sound

When he saw a figure rummaging through the canned rations, he raised his gun, seeing that he was unarmed

“Put your hands in the air!” He shouted, the figure turned around, face scarred and torn, the back row of his teeth showing on one side, and, a cyber arm

They knew this was the guy who broke into the room

The room was dark so immediately Gaz turned the lights on to get a better look at the man

As soon as the lights buzzed on and the white light filled the room, Simons heart jumped, he felt like he was going to faint

It was you, the love of his life

The way he knew? The giant scar under your eye on the right (your left) side of your face

He dropped his gun and stepped closer

The others, after some time, came to the realisation that it was their missing teammate from 4 years ago

Simon ran up to you, engulfing you in a suffocating hug

He kept muttering your name over and over again, tears in his eyes as he was rocking you back and fourth

“I miss you so much, you don’t even know, I’ve grieved over you for so long, life has been so empty without you” he kept going on about how much he loves you and missed you

The others also put their weapons away and ran up to you

Simon let you go for a little bit to let the other’s suffocate you in their one big group hug

They had never seen Simon so soft and loving towards someone, it was almost a shock, for the past 4 years, even before you went missing, he was cold and almost empty

Simon cupped your face and traced his fingers over your scars he had never seen before

He was just so overwhelmed he let his tears spill as did you, he took off his mask and pulled you into a loving kiss, he felt like he was dreaming

After he finally pulled away to let you breathe, his eyes trailed down to your robot arm and brought your hand up to his chest

Even if you where missing a nose and had horrible scars, exposing the inside of your mouth, he loved you just as much

He felt like his heart was full again

After they finally got back to base you explained what happened during the past 4 years

After the other side took you to their base, they tortured you everyday, they forced you to work for them in their factory

During a freak accident while you where working, your arm was torn off

Later on after the accident you tried to escape but they set off a grenade close enough to you to do damage, but not kill you, resulting in the tissue of your face coming off

The other scars where from years of torture

You had finally managed to get a hold of some explosives and a gun with some ammo and had gone on a killing spree, grabbing a cyber arm from one of their rooms, and dashing from room to room to hide

You had finally learnt from your lesson all those years ago, you finally learnt to be sneaky and not just go for the kill when you wanted

That night after you said your good nights to everyone else, Simon led you to his room and pulled you to his bed

His grip on you never let up through the whole night

He was so unbelievably happy to have you back in his arms

Even while you where asleep he stared at you lovingly, tracing your face and leaving feather kisses all over

He couldn’t stop himself from crying himself to sleep (from happy tears ofc)

[queenofbaws]

Queenie Queenie Queenie. I come here, on my knees like a silly little court jester, begging and pleading. I would LOVE more CREEPs shenanigans. 🙏🙏🙏

I hope this weekend and week are kind to you, and that you’re having a good day ^^ :D

"I just don't understand how you're already in trouble." Warily, Sam eyed the papers scattered across the table, some colored, some white, all boasting the worst graphic design she'd seen in her life. The semester had started, uh, yesterday, and to see so much busywork - so much wasted printer paper - laid out before the guys...well, it wasn't surprising, maybe, but it sure as heck was confusing.

From just outside the kitchen, Ashley snorted. "I get it. This is kind of a record for them, honestly."

She turned, bewildered. "No way! I - " and then her memories of the past few months came flooding back, one after another after another. Josh hiding blood packs in his clothes, Chris hiding in the shower to jump out and scream during Bloody Mary, Josh loading Ashley up with fake contact lenses and magnetized Ouija boards and...oh boy. " - okay, yeah. On second thought, yeah. I guess I get it."

"Know what I'm hearing from all this?" Chris asked without so much as glancing away from his laptop. "Jealousy. Jell. Us. See. You guys wish you were as funny as we were."

"Oh God. That means you didn't just get in trouble, you got in trouble and then doubled down." With a sigh, Ashley finally joined them in the kitchen, giving the fridge and its colorful magnets a wide, wide, wiiide berth. She hopped up onto one of the countertops, hanging onto the edge as she gently swung her feet. "Why am I not surprised..."

Finally, someone had given Josh the cue he was waiting for. He neatly organized the worksheets in front of him, tapping them on the table to even them all out. "For your information," he began, adopting his most uppity ghost-hunt-announcer-tone, "neither I nor Cochise did anything wrong. Not a damn thing."

"You tell 'em, man. No justice, no peace!"

Sam's eyebrow popped. "Looks like, uh...looks like maybe you did, champ."

But Josh, undaunted, shook his head. "Nope. We've been unjustly accused, and if you think I'm not taking this to the head of the film department at the end of the week, ohoho, you are sorely mistaken. We'll be vindicated in the end."

The girls shared a look that required no words. Then Sam sighed. "What did you do?"

"Again, nothing." Setting his papers down, Josh took on a different posture, folding his hands and leaning in towards Sam as if they were about to share a secret. "Here are the facts. This afternoon, Cochise and I showed up to one of our fancy new classes - "

"Narrative Structure in Television," Chris helpfully added.

" - and discovered we were in the presence of, well, just a real campus celebrity. Tier One kinda guy, know what I mean?"

"Professor Charles Lonnit," Chris piped back in, only for Josh to immediately (and jeeringly) correct him.

"Adjunct Professor Charles Lonnit. He of the shitty daytime tv documentary. Anyway, guy doesn't know what he's doing. Clearly. Definitely doesn't know how to handle a class of people under the age of 47, I'll tell you that much. So what does he do? He commits the gravest sin of a mid-level college course."

That got Chris. He shut his laptop, stared off into nothingness, and proceeded to shudder. "Ice breakers."

"Yeah. Ice breakers."

Sam narrowed her eyes, trying not to laugh; encouraging their behavior, she'd learned, was never the best idea. "Wow. Unthinkable."

"Right? Well, he tells us we're gonna play Two Truths and a Lie, which is already great, right? Fantastic. Definitely no way that can go wrong in a room full of strangers. So, I being who I am - namely the king of showmanship and deception - "

From the counter, Ashley groaned. And groaned. And, when Josh tried talking over her, groaned even louder.

" - didn't even pause. I knew my shit. My three fun facts about myself, then, such as I am, were: (1) My dad's a famous movie director so I'm not too worried about this class, (2) I was once physically assaulted by someone suffering from possession and subsequently broke my tailbone - "

The sound Ashley made from the countertop was a little different that time.

" - aaaaaaand (3) my favorite color is purple." Josh paused for dramatic effect. "It didn't go over well when I revealed my favorite color is actually green, let's leave it at that."

"And you?" Sam asked, leaning on her elbows as she shifted her attention to Chris.

Without a shred of shame, he shrugged, listing off his own facts. "Yeah, see, mine were: (1) I once found a dead guy hidden inside my friend's basement wall, Edgar Allan Poe style, (2) the possessed girl who broke Josh's tailbone is my girlfriend - "

Ashley went back to groaning. When Sam turned her way, she watched as she yanked the brim of her beanie down over her eyes, hiding her face from the world at large.

" - aaand (3) I'm just, like, suuuuuuch a huge fan of Architects of Murder." He paused too, then clarified. "Oh, that's the show the professor makes."

"Adjunct professor," Josh corrected him again.

There was a moment of silence between the four of them, and then Sam's chair screeched as she pushed herself back from the table. "Yeah, yup, you two deserve it," she sighed. "Good luck with your punishment-homework, Ash and I are gonna head out. Find some better friends, maybe. Ones who don't get in trouble the first week of classes."

"First rule of film school, Sammy," Josh teased, "I will not now - nor will I ever - apologize for my art."

[sl-vega]

✧xingqiu's victims friends✧

THIS SERIES IS CANCELLED: announcement about its cancellation

THE SERIES REVAMP IS HERE

✧xingqiu✧-a creative writing major with a minor in literature, second born son of the CEO of Feiyun Corp. discovered his love and reading and writing at a young age. when he was 10 he wrote a fanfic as a joke but to his surprise it went viral. he forgot the account's password so he never got around to deleting it. comes off as an absolute gentleman, but he's actually a bit of a gremlin.

"me? putting chili powder into chongyun's food? what baseless accusations are these-okay fine, i did, but how else is he supposed to survive living with xiangling?-"

✧xiangling✧-attends a culinary school nearby teyvat university. she does the cooking but not cleaning for all her roommates. she has a pet dog named guoba, and her father owns a famous restaurant. she's known for her weird sounding recipes, but they actually taste really good (except for the slime smoothies, that's an acquired taste)

"so we have jueyun chilis, fowl meat, now we just need some some slime secretations!"

✧chongyun✧-mythological studies major with a minor in theology. he went through a ghost hunting phase when he was younger, which turned into an interest in mythology and folklore as he got older. he met xingqiu in elementary school and they've been friends ever since (even though xingqiu constanly tries to sneak him spicy food)

"i know for a fact that xingqiu put jueyun chilis in that"

✧yanfei✧-a student at a law school nearby xiangling's culinary school. she's great at winning arguments/debates, and already has tons of internship offers from many different law firms. she has tons of rules/laws memorized just in case, and can apply them to any situation

"Ah, this weather's got me in the mood for reciting some laws. Let's see... "Commercial Law of Liyue," Chapter 27, Section 6, Article 3 stipulates that— Wait, what was it...? Oh my goodness, I've completely forgotten! What is wrong with me today...?"

✧hu tao✧-forensics science major, and her family owns a funeral parlor (frequently advertises it, telling people that she can hook them up with a free coffin). a bit eccentric, but she means well. she's also a horror and true crime fanatic (criminal minds, forensic files etc.)

"YOU! YES YOU! what if i told you, that if you plan with wangsheng funeral parlor today you can get a discount on your future coffin!"

✧gaming✧-dance major, and a part time uber driver and the designated driver for every outing with his friends. he's the type of driver that talks a ton to his passenger, but he'll shut up if needed. most of his passengers mispronounce his name upon pick up, and he's very used to jokes about his name.

"hi i'll be your driver for today-hm? yes, my name is actually gaming"

additional notes:

-everyone is in their sophmore (second year) of university (19-20)

-everyone in xingqiu's friend group lives off campus together

-yanfei doesn't attend teyvat university, she is in her second year of law school at oratrice mecanique d'analyse cardinale

-xiangling attends a culinary school nearby oratrice and teyvat university

-xingqiu's a wattpad author. fight me

✧Going off Script✧

synopsis:

Xingqiu's next major project requires him to write a romantic short story, the only problem is that he has zero romantic experience. meanwhile, you just found out that your boyfriend cheated on you, and you need to show him that you're 100% over him, the only problem is that there's no way you can get an actual boyfriend that quickly. clearly, the solution to both of your issues is to fake date each other. all you need to do is stick to the script

spoiler alert: you go off script and end up falling for him

masterlist

(CLOSED) taglist: @freyao7

[thelunarfairy]

Do you have any theories about this?

Because I find It really interesting especially the twin star part

I remember creating several hypotheses when I read this chapter for the first time. We know it's a section marked by metaphors between the twins and the first thing that came to my mind was that Tsukasa would be the brightest star, but I stopped to think a little.

There are two interpretations that I like to consider in relation to this moment (there must be many others, but these two are the most relevant for me)

There are two moments surrounding the twins, the moment when they were alive and the posthumous moment. When they were alive, Tsukasa apparently stood out compared to his brother. The information we have indicates that he had several friends and seemed to be a reasonably pleasant person to be around.

In the PP arc, we see a fake world, that is, it was reflecting the desire of Hanako and Mitsuba, since they are the "main characters" We see here that Mitsuba has many friends, just like Amane has a good relationship even with Akane, something that Yashiro finds strange.

It means that in Amane's ideal world he would have friends, and we see at a certain point that when Tsukasa offers to help, his colleagues reject him and want Amane. That's not what happens in real life.

So let's assume that when they were alive, Tsukasa was the twin who attracted attention and Amane was the brother who didn't stand out.

However, when we talk about posthumous moments, we discover that almost no one knows about Tsukasa's existence, even Teru. I always found this very interesting. Hanako is the ghost boy who has a title, he is the leader of the 7 mysteries and everyone knows him, even if they don't like him, some have lived with him, others have heard of him.

The rumors about him reached Nene, Kou also knew. So in the afterlife Hanako became the one who attracts attention.

So you ask me, ok, but how is this related to the stars?

Hanako is referred to as a supernatural, so he perhaps represented 'Antares A', the one everyone sees, while 'Antares B' represents Tsukasa, who many don't know about. There isn't much information available about him, and he only appears under certain circumstances.

Hanako and Tsukasa are parallel, they both grant wishes but only Hanako is known. Even though Tsukasa is spreading rumors at school, people don't mention his name as a possibility of being responsible for the events, it's strangely mysterious to me how this is possible because Tsukasa attracts attention for being so unpredictable but no one is talking about him.

It's always Hanako who takes the blame, if Teru knew it was Tsukasa from the beginning he would definitely have gone and beaten Tsukasa (or tried to) he only mentions Tsukasa when talking about the red house.

Maybe he knows about Tsukasa's existence, but doesn't talk about him.

So in short, in life apparently Tsukasa stood out, in the afterlife it was Amane.

But let's get into another interpretation besides this one about one twin overshadowing the other.

We know that the twins were born in November, November 25, which means they are Sagittarius. You may remember that the Yugi twins are also associated with the constellation Scorpio and its brightest star, Antares.

Hanako talks about it

We have something very interesting about this, in UA Night on the Galactic Railway, Tsukasa is represented as the Scorpio constellation itself.

You can see he has a scorpion's tail and a red flame representing the red giant, Antares. Hanako doesn't have that.

Okay, but what's interesting about that?

Have you ever seen how the constellations are positioned in the night sky?

(Image translation: Escorpião = Scorpio, centauro = centaur)

Sagittarius is hunting Scorpio

You can already imagine what point I'm trying to get to, right?

Tsukasa represents the scorpion, which is being hunted.

Another interesting point is the story of the legend of Sargittarius. Look:

"The myth of the sign of Sagittarius is Chiron, a centaur (figure half man and half horse) who lived in the middle of the forest with his tribe, being for them a kind of king. He was known for being very intelligent, having great knowledge about human behavior and also about nature. As a weakness he had a wild and non-rational aspect. He was the wisest in the forest when it came to creating natural remedies and healing potions for any type of wound or injury they found. However, one day Chiron was injured by a poisoned arrow, but instead of dying, because of his wisdom, he received the gift of immortality from the Greek gods. He did not die but lived wounded for eternity, needing to learn to deal with this pain. In this way, he represents someone who is wise, has knowledge, but still needs to live with pain. Despite knowing how to heal others, he is not able to do the same for himself, and even so he needed to learn to remain positive and have good energy."

Source: Google

Does this remind you of anyone specific?

Maybe Aidairo wanted to represent them through signs, or represent that one stands out more than the other

These metaphors that Aidairo put in the story are very interesting, they open up several interpretations, you can choose which one you find most believable.

[wuxianxkexing]

So the cake is done! I can't speak on the taste as of right now since I haven't tried it yet but I'll talk about the process.

I don't think I let the cake cool enough before removing it from the pan so the shape is a bit messed up. It literally fell apart on me so I kind of just pieced it back together and covered it up with frosting. lol The chocolate avocado frosting didn't turn out as smooth as it looked in the recipe I copied, but I bastardized both the cake and the frosting recipes that I used for inspiration so maybe my experimentation is to blame for both of those mishaps. Also I'm not sure if its the mixture of the different types of icing or what but the store bought icing I used for decoration started to bleed, as you can see, so it isn't as pretty as it could've been.

In the middle of the cake is a layer of thinly sliced cinnamon apples topped with cinnamon pumpkin. Does cinnamon go with chocolate cake? No idea but it seemed appropriate to add (to me) so I did. Apple because of Wei Wuxian's donkey Lil' Apple, and pumpkin because his birthday is on Halloween and what is Halloween without pumpkin? The writing is supposed to say Wei Wuxian, but my writing also sucks so if you can't read it or if it isn't quite right sorry about that. lol I did ghost bunnies and ghost fires for the cake (because Wei Wuxian loves bunnies and he likes going on night hunts, also Halloween). The roses were store bought and are just there to look pretty (and maybe symbolize what a simp I am for him but we'll ignore that one). The blueberries were originally going to be used for the ghost bunnies eyes and mouths but they ended up being too big so I just made them hold them instead and used the rest for decoration. I was going to put ghost bunnies all around the side of the cake but I stopped at just those two because the second one looked so horrible. I didn't actually use any proper cake decorating tools/tips so I was limited on what I could feasibly do with the store bought icing I used for decoration.

Anyways I'm a loser and here is Wei Wuxian's birthday cake!

Edit: Taste update! The apple is a no go in my opinion. It just brings too many different flavors into the cake. I recommend sticking with only pumpkin as the filling and then topping it with blueberries. It tastes way better that way. The fake roses, while edible, taste pretty bad. The rest is pretty good!

Another edit: Yup I totally fucked up spelling Wei Wuxian's name. This is how it should look. 无羡. So I didn't mess up terribly bad but it still wasn't quite right. 😔

[nicki0kaye]

you.

@mymblesbuir, you get it

that bitch was so ready to die. it was pure chance he was able to escape, and like. Obviously he does create a plan on the fly, but I think that shit was him moving on instinct. And even then, it was a CRAPSHOOT that the Ghost would catch his escape pod at all.

and there was no plan beyond that.

he barely integrates into the rebellion, is still talking like a bond villain, idk maybe its just how I see him, but the man is not adjusting. Not in how he speaks or carries himself, and that has to be a choice for such a calculating person. I do think there's an aspect of he just can't turn it off, but I also think that he just straight up doesn't know what he'd do if he DID. Like...he has no idea what to do with himself. He is consciously out of place, in part because he never thought he'd get out. I don't know if he still believes he should be out beyond, like, having no choice and also being a genuine asset for the rebellion.

idk, its just something I love to think about, how out of place he is and how conscious he must be of that fact and how much of it is his choice to remain so obviously Imperial-in-Rebel-Clothing. How much does the dissonance bother him? Is he doing it to keep ppl at a distance? Is he playing to ppls expectations or his own? Is he genuinely so focused on work that he doesn't care to loosen up or is he using work as an excuse to avoid having to rebuild outside the strict but known social parameters of the Empire?

is he genuinely comfortable in his own skin, or is it just the skin he's worn for so long, he can't trust what he might find underneath? There's so much more going on, after all. Him 'finding' himself is such a low fuckin priority.

I got to explore that a bit in my 'Meet the In-Laws' Kalluzeb fic for those curious. The context is he's met with his older brother, Tuz, who is giving him flack for covering his tattoos and keeping up a fake accent. Tuz insists it's because Alex was ashamed of his family. Alex goes off;

"I was an Imperial spy who had defected to the Rebellion," Alex hisses. He can hear his own voice going pitchy from stress, from the strain of keeping it lowered and this private conversation private, but he has to explain, or more accurately, he couldn't stop himself from explaining, now, if he tried. It just has to come out. Tuz has no idea what wound he's prodding at– (Would Zeb? No, Alex has never told him, not in so many words. He's never told anyone.) "I was under constant scrutiny after–after nearly two decades of pretending to be a model example of the Empire's–of humanity's superiority, hunting down and snuffing out any descent! Do you know what would have happened if I suddenly dropped that act? Hmm? After switching sides? When everyone around me was scrutinizing my every move, because they either suspected or were out right certain I was some triple agent? Still bowing and scraping for the Emperor behind closed doors? All the grace I'd earned would have gone up in smoke, that's what. Wasted on something as juvenile as ego." Blood now pounding in his ears, Alex starts punctuating each declaration with a rough stab at the table. "They needed to trust me. I needed them to trust me so I could do my job! Yes, I hid my tattoos, because I didn't have time to waste, explaining how I got them and whether they were authentic. I didn't start talking like I used to because it didn't matter, and it would have only distracted from the karking war." He cuts himself off, there. Swallows down around the rest–how isolating it was, how claustrophobic it felt at times, how maddening the contradiction of it was, that he was free and still, voluntarily trapped in his Imperial costume. How he had so many selfish reasons for leaving the Empire and near all of them were set aside for the sake of the Rebellion, and that it ate at him– –that it eats at him still, 8 standard months out and still stuck in his ways, afraid of upsetting the tentative balance he's found with Zeb in their new home. It's choking him slowly, and still he clings to what he knows, falls back on the bad habits and the lies, continues to make excuses for why it just isn't 'the right time' to begin his soul searching, to find who he 'really' is. (When is he going to admit to Garazeb how afraid he is that there's nothing under the costume to find?)

[corvidcall]

okay!!! (rubs my hands together like im making an evil little scheme) (because i am)

first off, im gonna suggest Sagan Hawkes, who does retrospectives on indie horror stuff. my personal fave videos are There Will Never Be Another Petscop (which is about two projects that started as Petscop knock offs but developed into really interesting art in their own right) and Diminish: The Rage Game Lets Play About Loss (about an unfiction series where a man is playing a game his late twin sister made for him).

next, Jacob Geller has a voice that i think is really unique in the video essay scene. A lot of his videos are really... idk how to describe it. Poetic? Lyrical? Artistic in their own right? They seem very reminiscent of the way people write personal essays, which imo sets him apart from his peers (who seem to lean more towards a less personal, more documentarian style). I've recommended one of his videos on my fallen london blog before!! The Golem and the Jewish Superhero is really good, as is Who's Afraid of Modern Art. and his video Fear of Depths is great if you wanna think too hard about dying in a cave and then get oh so scared

in the opposite stylistic direction (imo) is Dan Olson, who makes really thorough and compelling videos about movies and culture, and has recently been focusing a lot on debunking the tech hype cycle. His video about crypto and NFTs, Line Goes Up, may have quite possibly influenced the crash in the NFT market?? But Line Goes Up is pretty dry, so I would probably suggest A Lukewarm Defense of Fifty Shades of Grey (this is actually part 1 of a series where he talks about all the 50 shades movies and the books, and theyre all great. the videos i mean. 50 shades is pretty bad) or That Time Geocentrists Tricked A Bunch of Physicists (which is about a documentary that featured a bunch of physicists seeming to say that heliocentrism is wrong and the sun actually orbits the earth, and about some really crazy tradcaths). In Search of Flat Earth is really good, too, but its kind of a bummer because its about Qanon

Big Joel is also one of my faves (both for his videos, and because i think its very funny that his youtube channel is named "big joel" even though he isnt big and his name is not joel). Trash Disney Remakes is fun, and you might also enjoy A Reality TV Dystopia: I Wanna Marry Harry

...oh my god this post is already way too long and ive only suggested three people. i am so sorry. god made me wrong as a joke. lets do the rest of these much faster or your flight will have landed by the time im done talking. speed round.

I Debunked Every "Body Language Expert" on Youtube by münecat

European History is Not White History by Shaun

MyHouse.Wad - Inside Doom's Most Terrifying Mod by Power Pak

Why Is Conservative Comedy So… Not Very Good? by Some More News

also, i cant recommend any specific videos, but you might enjoy PhilosophyTube (talks about philosophy, obviously) and Well There's Your Problem (a "podcast with slides" about engineering disasters)

to round out my excessively long list, theres a bunch of commentary youtubers who arent doing video essays qua video essays, as their videos are more focused on being funny and less on being informative, but i think theyre sister genres, and i enjoy them very much, so heres some good ones if you want a chuckle:

I followed a bunch of tutorials on how to get taller by Drew Gooden (the guy from the road work ahead vine)

I Tried Ghost Hunting To See If It's Fake by Danny Gonzalez

Alpha Tips & Tricks by Chad Chad

The Worst Talk Show Is Still On The Air (Maury) by Jarvis Johnson

I Drove to Every Rainforest Cafe in North America by Ted Nivison

I ate at every Rainforest Cafe in the County by Eddy Burback

anyway. uh. sorry about all this lol. i almost exclusively watch youtube every day all day and i have many thoughts and opinions. this isnt even everyone i watch and enjoy. this was me attempting to curate my recommendations.

I have a 4 hour flight this weekend so if anyone has any video essay recommendations for me to download on my phone feel free to tell me

[cherryxsang]

𝐎𝐔𝐓𝐋𝐀𝐖

Outlaw!San x Bountyhunter!Reader (afab) Genre: smut Word count: 3.7k Warnings: POSSIBLY TRIGGERING BRIEF SEXUAL VIOLENCE (San tries to attack the reader for sexual reasons but doesn't actually do anything), dub con (San is drunk), physical fighting, handcuffs, penetrative sex, handjob, oral sex (m and f), spit kink, hate sex?, filthy dialogue

»»————————————►

You tried to keep your nerves at bay as you reached for the door of the bar on a night you’d been searching for for weeks. It wasn’t the building you were searching for, but a certain person you were hunting. One of your sources had tipped you off that he would be in that very building on that very night.

You stepped inside and quickly scanned everything around you. Although the bar was brightly lit, it was also quite busy, and you didn’t see him just yet. You tugged at the itchy frills of your dress and followed your senses. If I were an outlaw, where would I be, you asked yourself. That question lead you to a counter located near the back of the building. It was slightly less illuminated and not as packed with people.

You stepped inside and quickly scanned everything around you. Although the bar was brightly lit, it was also quite busy, and you didn’t see him just yet. You tugged at the itchy frills of your dress and followed your senses. If I were an outlaw, where would I be, you asked yourself. That question lead you to a counter located near the back of the building. It was slightly less illuminated and not as packed with people.

Your heart pounded with excitement when your eyes focused in on the silhouette of one man. Your gut told you that you’d found him. As you carefully approached, you caught a glimpse of his profile and knew immediately from his wanted pictures that he was your man. Here we go, you thought.

Unlike most women who walk into a saloon after sunset, you weren’t there looking to wow him, at least not as your final goal. You were there to trap him. He had a hefty bounty on his head, and you had found that you were a natural at this kind of thing.

You scooted yourself onto a stool near the outlaw, keeping a close eye in your peripheral while also appearing cool. As you leaned your elbows on the bar counter you felt his heavy gaze take its post on you. “A bourbon, please,” you smiled at the bartender.

A chuckle to your right. You looked over as an unknowing stranger, your eyes wide with feigned innocence. That was the first time you gazed into the cat-shaped eyes of Choi San. The same dark and weathered, yet still young and curious eyes that had seen every one of his crimes. Ten known murders and an estimated thousands worth of stolen goods, among other things. You hated yourself for noticing how attractive those eyes were.

Through dark and droopy—probably drunk—eyelashes, he looked your feminine form up and down. “Sorry, miss,” he said, his voice deep and gravelly, “I just wouldn’t have expected a pretty little thing like you to walk into a place like this.”

You smiled at him—a fake one, you were sure—and responded in your nicest voice, “Well, sir, I did expect to see a handsome man like yourself, see.”

He flashed a cocky smile as his gaze dropped down to his drink. “You city women are a peculiar treat,” he said in a low voice. It made your confidence waver just a bit. Had he already become suspicious of your character? Should you have put on a smooth, slow drawl to match his? You cleared your throat and shooed the thoughts away.

Ignoring what he had said, you spoke again, remaining composed. “If I’m not mistaken- Did I notice that you’re alone tonight? Would be a shame.” You fingered the condensation on your drink glass, anxious for his response.

“I’m always alone, miss.” You rolled your eyes at his vague and, you judged, pompous answer, but nonetheless began to plan your next move. That is, until you felt the vibration of the stool next to yours moving. You inhaled deeply, instinctively ghosting your hand over the pocket-sized pistol that was strapped to your thigh under your dress, but allowing San to take the seat beside you. “That don’t have to mean physically, though,” he added.

You giggled through your teeth, watching a warm smile grace his soft but masculine features. Now that he was close, you noticed how large he was—not especially tall, but muscular. A true farmhand’s build. How charming. That was also when you realized that you had placed your hand on his arm to flirt with him. It wasn’t a conscious choice, just a reflex. Still, all part of the job.

“Can I buy that for you?” he motioned to your drink. Sensing an opportunity arising, you answered with a cunning “sure.”

“Perhaps I could repay you in some way,” you said softly and avoiding eye contact, acting shy. The look San gave you sent a chill down your spine. It was as if you could see his mind switch gears, see the tunnel vision activate. His face darkened, his eyebrows resting shiftily above his eyes and his polite smile fading with seriousness. But it only lasted a second, and then dimples melted back into his tan skin.

“It would be much obliged,” he almost whispered, his voice sweet like molasses. It made you weirdly nervous. You were silently puzzled by the fact that you felt your trust in yourself dwindling. You can do this, you reminded yourself. Your internal quarrel was interrupted by San reaching very suddenly for your hand. “You know,” he started mindlessly, toying with your fingers. You kept stern eye contact, reminding yourself not to be fooled by his prowess and to keep your guard up. “Despite your cold reputation, you city ladies are really quite friendly.”

He looked at you and you smiled politely, telling him, “I’m full of surprises, sir.” Never breaking eye contact, you added, “And can I have my ring back?” You probably shouldn’t have said it, as it could set him off and ruin your chances of getting the bastard caught. You didn’t care about the ring anyhow, it was a simple prop. But he was cocky, attempting to steal your ring right in front of you. And you were annoyed.

San gave you wide eyes of surprise but quickly covered himself with a laugh. Holding your ring on the tip of his pointer and examining it, “Let me pay you for it with another drink,” he said smugly, dropping the ring in his pocket plainly. “It’s not worth much anyways.”

You rolled your eyes playfully. “Or…” You raked your fingers up and down the cowboy’s denim-clad thigh. “Spend the night with me and we’ll call us even.”

San dipped his head in feigned shyness. He kept his head down for a second too long and it made you uneasy. You knew he was imagining all the things he might be able to get away with doing to you. “You are something, city miss. You don’t even know my name.” He maintained a teasing smile.

“Mine is Y/N,” you offered.

“San,” he returned, pulling your hand to his mouth for a kiss. All calculated, you reminded yourself. “There’s an inn next door,” he suggested.

“Let’s go.” The two of you stood up, abandoning your own drink while San quickly finished his off. He replaced his hat and led you out of the saloon. The walk to the bedroom you would be occupying was clouded by a war within your head. You didn’t know what it was exactly. You knew your plan was to get him alone, handcuff him and bring him straight to the police’s attention. But there was a nerve-wracking feeling deep down that you didn’t trust yourself this time. You didn’t know what exactly you were worried about, you’d done this all before after all, but nonetheless something felt strange. There was some part of yourself that you felt you weren’t in control of.

Those thoughts were interrupted when you arrived at your rented room which San had ever-so-kindly paid for. He let you in first then closed the door. “Finally,” he sighed darkly. The next thing you knew, you were off your feet, caught completely off guard. San had picked you up by your waist and thrown you roughly onto the mattress. He was quick to climb on top of you, thighs around your waist and with a tight grip on either wrist. Even drunk, the bastard was damn strong.

“Get off me, you fucker!” you shouted, blindsided by the sudden danger. You were painfully aware of the cold metal of your pistol on your thigh, so close but entirely out of reach.

“I’ve been waiting too fucking long for this.” The two of you struggled, meanwhile San had let one of your hands go to allow himself to fumble his belt undone. You began to desperately punch him as hard as you could. All the while he was staring you in the eye expressionless. “You’ll lay still and take me, stupid whore.”

Once he had unzipped his jeans, he began pulling at your dress. As he worked the mess of fabric up your thighs, he unintentionally revealed your weapon. He shot you a look like he was scared, his brows furrowed and eyes wide. “What are you?” he asked frantically.

He was weakened by his confusion and you were able to twist away from him, your feet hitting the floor. He quickly grabbed you again, but now you were able to kick him back by his stomach. You tried to calm your nerves while he was down and reached for your gun. This has gotten out of hand, you told yourself. I have to end it.

Before you could cock the pistol, San grabbed it by its barrel. He pushed you backwards until you hit a wall. You shouted as your head hit the hard wooden door frame and continued to wrestle for your gun. Again, San just stared expressionless. He was probably petrified. He was fighting for his life, but so were you. “You shouldn’t have fucked with me,” he whispered. “But I hope you’re having as much fun as I am,” he smirked. With his body pressed against yours, you happened to notice that he was rock hard. You didn’t do anything with that information except get the idea to knee him hard in his groin.

When he fell to the ground you quickly spun around to his back side and pointed your ready gun at him. You still had another tool on your body: a set of handcuffs in an inside pocket of your dress. The realization gave you an idea: Stick to the original plan. But you needed to get him near the bed first. So you climbed onto the mattress, your pistol still locked on San. Sure enough, as soon as he got to his feet, he jumped on the mattress with you, reaching for your gun again. But you were ready for him, grabbing him by his neck and throwing him down with all your adrenaline-fueled strength. His skull hit the headboard in a thud and you sat on his chest, the handcuffs already in your hand. You dropped your pistol and through a struggle managed to chain his hands together, looped around the headboard so he couldn’t move.

Stepping back, you took a few seconds to ensure he was immobilized and to catch your breath. You thought you imagined at first when San started to laugh maniacally. A drop of blood slowly rolled down his forehead, meanwhile he grinned. “What are you?” he asked again. “Bounty hunter?”

Proud of the work you accomplished tonight, you told him honestly, “Yes.”

He continued to laugh, mumbling to himself, “Fuck me. City miss. Bounty hunter. I thought you were just an odd whore.” He adjusted his legs, seemingly getting himself comfortable as he accepted his fate. He wiped his blood on his denim jacket. “You have no idea how much fun that was. Between us, I like a feisty woman.”

You took a step closer to him. “You were hard,” you said flatly.

He grunted in response, rolling his head toward you. “You’re gorgeous. And you put up a hell of a fight, Y/N.”

“You’re gorgeous, too, actually.” What’s the harm in telling a man likely soon to face death row? “When I heard your description…your crimes…I wasn’t imagining something like you.”

He listened intently. The first time that night that you felt he was really hearing what you said, it was when you were praising him. He was disgusting, and yet look at him; Chained up and submissive. At your complete disposal. You thanked the heavens for your occupation as a bounty hunter and not a member of the police force. There were no rules against what you had now accepted you wanted to do.

You simply undid your dress, allowing it to pool at your feet. San was silent, just watching for whatever you would do next. “You’re going to fuck me, cowboy. Then we’ll be even.”

He laughed harder than before, his broad chest heaving. “You really are a whore.”

You punched his mouth. That shut him up. Then your eyes trailed to the tall tent in his jeans. You finished what he had started earlier, unzipping them all the way and fishing his rock-solid dick out. It was tall and veiny, leaking and frustrated. You felt your arousal spill at the sight. You pulled his jeans down to his knees and then you straddled him, hovering above his hard-on.

You undid the buttons of his leather vest, exposing his swollen abs and pecs. You threw his hat across the room and examined the wound on the top of his scalp. You dabbed the blood with the bed sheet and then carefully combed your fingers through his bangs. You took care with him now as in a moment of weakness, you let your mind wander straight into fantasy. If only this deadly, gorgeous man had a soul, you thought. Maybe you would try to make him yours. Still, you took pride in being the only woman to ever take him down and make him feel weak.

“Don’t fall in love with me,” he teased you, sensing your hatred for him slipping.

You grabbed him by the neck and pushed his stupid head against the hard wood of the head board. “Don’t you fucking dare,” you said.

“Then just fuck me already, will you?” he spat, fed up. His dick was still standing there all alone in the cold room and you guessed it was painful for him. Good.

You peeled your underwear off of your already sweaty body and slowly lowered yourself onto his dick, facing away from him as you couldn't bring yourself to look at the bastard’s face any longer. He felt even bigger inside of you and he had a beautiful curve, effortlessly brushing against your sweet spot with every movement. You and San let out a unison moan as you bottomed out and your walls fluttered around him.

He was silent now as you rode him. No snide comments as you finally gave him what he really wanted all along. But you couldn’t complain about what he wanted because you were giving yourself a little treat too. If he’s going to be arrested and likely executed, why not make him useful while he has the chance?

You rubbed your clit against San’s pubic bone, the friction causing you to tense around him with each grind of your hips, much to San’s delight. He was shameless, a moaning, whiny mess behind you. He was breathing heavily and you imagined by the way he was tugging at his restraints that if his hands were free they’d be all over you right now. A part of you longed to feel those arms. Not San’s, you reminded yourself, but maybe someone’s.

You settled to fuck yourself stupid on the outlaw’s dick. You held his thighs as you sought out the feeling of sharp, quick thrusts. You moved rhythmically, tensing and relaxing your muscles, allowing yourself to revel in the sensation of being stuffed full.

Soon enough, San started going crazy beneath you, tugging harder at his handcuffs, his thighs twitching. That was your cue to lift your hips. You weren't about to let a criminal place some kind of mark on you with his seed. Plus you weren’t done with him. San groaned deeply at the loss of sensation. You turned around and he looked like he wanted to kill you right then and there. “What the fuck, Y/N?” he hissed sharply.

“You piece of shit,” you retorted, “We just started. You need to make me cum, too.” You brushed his lips, which were slightly swollen from your earlier punch, with two fingers and without verbal direction he obeyed and opened his mouth. “Let me see that tongue,” you whispered to yourself, meaning to only say it in your head.

“I don’t-”

“Shut up,” you said before grabbing a handful of his hair and directing his mouth to your pussy as you crawled forward. Despite his apparent resistance, he obediently stuck his tongue out for you and lapped at you like a starved man. You grinded against his tongue, seeking more. “Suck me,” you said, and he did just that, wrapping his swollen lips around your clit. You didn’t need to give him any further instruction, he knew just what to do as he continued to happily drink up every last bit of your arousal and paid close attention to your clit. You came undone with a string of high-pitched moans and kept a hand in his hair so he couldn’t get away, not that you thought he’d ever try to. He continued to gently work you through your orgasm, and you laughed, “You might hate me, San. You might want me dead, but you still can’t get enough of my pussy, can you?”

He disconnected from you and looked up with puppy eyes. “Please let me cum, miss.” How sweet, you thought. Miss. You had apparently broken him when you didn't even really mean to. You tried your best not to smile at his cute, pitiful state and instead busied yourself with licking your arousal off of his chest. The mixture of cum and sweat was salty but sweet in a way. You licked up the crevice between his pecs and then swirled your tongue around one of his nipples. He hummed happily. “No one’s ever done that before,” he said.

“Which part?”

“Everything you just did.” There was a gentleness to his voice now. You knew it was just that he was more desperate than ever to cum and was trying to play his cards right to get there. But a part of you couldn’t help but enjoy it in the moment. Not that you were going soft, you told yourself. It was just sweet how a man as big and tough as San was always, at the end of the day,  a slave to his own dick.

You turned around again, sitting your wet pussy on his belly and wrapped your hand around his dick. You dropped a string of spit onto his cock head and spread it around with a couple of soft pumps. San moaned again behind you, once again chasing his long-awaited orgasm (although it hadn't been that long, he was just impatient). You continued pumping his shaft with one hand, while the other alternated between massaging his balls and teasing his tip. “It’s good, miss,” he whispered mindlessly. Sleepily. Drunkenly. Why did it make your hands move faster? “Feels so good…” When he started to stir again, you bent down, sticking your pussy in his face and sucked on his tip, tonguing the slit while your hands still worked him too.

A long and strained “Fuuuuuck,” told you he was close and you started pumping him as fast as you could, grabbing and sucking harder. Just a few pumps and you felt his warm seed spurting out into your mouth, felt his thighs quake, heard the pleasing aria of breathy and tired moans behind you. You decided you would swallow, if only to not create another mess for the innkeepers.

You looked back at the man you were sat on. He was lying still with his eyes closed, his chest rising and falling as he caught his breath after his orgasm. You took one last look at his marvelous dick before concealing it again with his jeans–you wanted to leave him some tiny bit of dignity when the police came to find him chained up.

You stood up, ready to call it a night and grab your things, but there was one more thing you just couldn’t shake the feeling that you had to do. “Don’t go,” San teased as you looked down at him.

You leaned down close to San’s face and stared at his lips, hoping he would catch your hint. He did, as he opened his lips just slightly, expectantly. You grabbed his jaw roughly and opened it the rest of the way, spitting on his tongue. “Enjoy the taste of yourself, you dirty fuck.”

He shot a pair of sharpened cat eyes and said, “You really are full of surprises, miss.”

As you slipped into your dress again, your head was full of thoughts. For the most part they were of your plan to get the sheriff to the inn, but there was a strange feeling you couldn’t ignore: Regret. Not of having slept with the San, but of not being able to do it again. It was quite fun. An exciting adventure and an enjoyable fuck, and now it was over. Even though he was a horrible man, you were going to miss him in a way. And though you felt no guilt over his arrest which was to come, you felt compelled to leave him with a goodbye.

“Good luck to you, San,” you said, tucking your forgotten pistol into your dress pocket. “Whatever happens to you, good luck.”

He watched you unamused. He sighed, then said, “You can fuck yourself. And I guess I’ll see you in hell.”

“I’ll see you when you’re being arrested,” you smiled, taking in the sight of the attractive outlaw handcuffed to a stranger’s bed for the last time before closing the door behind you.

From there, you went straight to the police station and informed the sheriff there of the outlaw waiting for his arrest. You led a pair of officers to the bedroom. Another gut feeling was telling you now that something was wrong, and as the officers rushed in, your fear was realized: there was no handsome criminal, just a broken headboard.

[pretendingday]

"I was quick to want the world rid of its fools an hour ago, I forget sometimes how much an exemplar I am among them." "That’s not how I see you."

A fanmix about James Fitzjames and Francis Crozier from AMC’s The Terror. Chronological and mostly canon compliant.

Listen on Spotify

Keep reading for songs and motivations.

1. All The Old Showstoppers - The New Pornographers

"When John he saw the numbers he lied, made up the whole thing, failed when he tried" This song is about responsibility, good intentions, and failure. It feels like a good place to start. Also, (Sir) John sure did fail when he tried.

2. Get Famous - The Mountain Goats

"You’ve been waiting for this, ever since you’ve been young, be careful not to choke on your tongue" This song will always be JFJ's theme song to me. The tone of it also fits in with the "tell us about bird shit island, why don't you, James" energy.

3. French Exit - The Antlers

"I’m not a puppy you take home, don’t bother trying to fix my heart" Now, this one is about fighting. It's about the "there hasn't been a single meal we've shared, a single conversation, when you weren't morbing on about what you're due." It's about the "keep your pity."

4. Victorian Ice - Sea Power

"And you better keep moving before you get totally cold" They're victorians, on ice. That's all the motivation you need. Also the song is about communication issues and needing each other, so... I rest my case.

5. Not Dead Yet - Lord Huron

"You’re tired of me, I’m tired of you" This song is about self-hatred and alcoholism. But it's also about not being dead yet, so there's... hope? Maybe?

6. The Counterfeiter - Crooked Fingers

"You don’t belong here, your heart’s a fake, the ghosts who chose you were mistaken" James has imposter syndrome, part one.

7. Someone You’d Admire - Fleet Foxes

"One of them wants only to be someone you’d admire, one would as soon just throw you on the fire" Sometimes it's hard to change, and even harder to know whether you want to impress someone, or still hate their guts. I feel like this goes for both of them.

8. Straight and Tall - Iron & Wine

"Don’t tell me all the shit you’ve done, how you push your luck with everyone, ‘cause your mean upbringing’s left you a mess" James has imposter syndrome, part two, but this time Francis goes "that's not how I see you".

9. Your Rocky Spine - Great Lake Swimmers

"I was moving across your frozen veneer, the sky was dark but you were clear" Listen, it's about the metaphors. I can't explain it to you, it's just the vibes.

10. I’ll Be Your Girl - The Decemberists

"I could be your man, but I’d be that much more" It's gender time. Reading way too much into the dress scene is something that can be so personal.

11. After Those Who Mean It - Laura Stevenson

"It’s as if you knew me, and even though it’s briefly, and though it’s not completely, I can feel you reading, reading me to sleep" This song is about persevering, even though you know it's all coming to an end. It's sad hours, and I'm afraid it's all downhill from here.

12. Colder Heavens - Blanco White

"Here I stand undressed, here I confess my doubt, did you know that I would?" The mortifying ordeal of being known, and also being hunted by a monster bear, and also there's a mutiny. That's not what the song is actually about, but it has the vibes.

13. Lucky Man - Emerson, Lake & Palmer

"He went to fight wars for his country and king, of his honour and his glory the people would sing" Something something "there will be poems". This song is the poem.

14. I Will - Mitski

"And while you sleep I’ll be scared, so by the time you wake I’ll be brave" I feel like I don't have to explain myself with this one, but I do have tissues if you need them. I did warn you it's sad hours.

15. The Pugilist - Keaton Henson

"But the truth is I need you to tell me I’m worthy of all this great living that I’ve been doing" James has imposter syndrome, part three, but now he's also dying.

16. Artifact #1 - Conor Oberst

"The world is full of missing persons, all of these unsolved mysteries" James is still dying. Francis is feeling... not great about it.

17. Genesis 30:3 - The Mountain Goats

"I will do what you ask me to do, because of how I feel about you" This is the song that made me start this fanmix. Imagine someone you love asking you to kill them. Imagine being unable to deny them anything. Remember when I said you could have my tissues? I take it back, I need them myself now, thanks.

18. Another New World - Josh Ritter

"I won’t call it rescue what brought me here back to the old world to drink and decline, and to pretend that the search for another new world was well worth the burning of mine" This song is about an arctic explorer surviving, but at much too great a cost. Perfect theme song for Final Girl Francis. It's also extremely long, so you have time to get all those tears out before moving on with your life. Thank you for listening.

[originalwinnercheesecake]

What Hollow Minds Revealed about Belos

Okay Wow , like Wow the last time an episode of a kids cartoon scared me this much... well okay it was when I first watched gravity falls “Northwest Mansion Mystery.... Hollow Minds may have been worse in than that. Everything Scary in NMM was so far steeped in “Cartoon” that you have to laugh at just how absurd the whole trama inducing situation was. A 100 year old ghost comes back for revenge over not getting a party invite? Stuffed animals coming to life and giving you a death message? People turning into tree’s? None of it could ever happen in real life. As people have pointed out though while Belos’s “magic spells” are fake, the way he lies, cons, plots, abuses, pretends to care for everybody but secretly cares for no one... its all realistic to the way Puritan Witch Hunters treated people back in Salem time. Its all realistic to how Dictators and tyrants treat people now.

Lets talk about Belos Pretending to care for a second. It is seeded throughout the show that while he is he main villain, he won’t be the Final Boss, His plans aren’t all his, and while he cannot talk to the Titan, he is talking to some powerful being who the crew will have to deal with one he gives out (more on the Collector later). His ability to swing from “Kindly Grandpa” to “Merciless Dictator’ is really unsettling. Hunter clearly suffers from pressure and PTSD, but their will be times where Belos acts really loving and fond of Hunter. the only time we see him strike at Hunter, he 1 misses and 2 acts like striking at him was an accident. When his VA tweeted about Belos being “misunderstood” I started to consider the possibility that his “curse” was also a metaphor for a condiion like involuntary muscle movements or schizophrenia, and because he is a puritan he refuses to take the potions to fix it. Also in Coven day Parade when he told the coven members that he struggles with Insecurities over his face but that their love for him gave him confidence , then took his mask off and showed them his face. You have to wonder if he does have any real fondness for these people. You know by now he wants to get rid of magic, but does he believe doing so will help these people, does he want to take them to the human realm with him to live “cleaner” “more worthy lives” as mundanes? And there is the whole lost brother, and grimwalker clone thing that suggested how lonely he is.

Does he truly love Hunter? His people? His brother? We get the answers in this episode. No. No. Yes, but also no. I had a lot of trouble making out any of the paintings in the deeper levels of Belo’s subconscious, and didn’t at first notice the ones of Caleb (I am going to assume that is his Brothers real name.). But I looked through the posts some other fans made, and I think we have enough to already piece together two’s backstory. Spoilers under the cut.

Okay so Caleb is the older Brother. He and Hunter look near identical (there ears and scars are the only diffrence). Caleb took care of Phillip a lot and the two were very close. Kid Phillip’s mask and sword are toys Caleb made for him. Growing up they both hated witches and witchcraft. Maybe in childhood their family’s crops did bad one year, or someone they loved got sick, and the church told them it was the “evil workings of a witch”. Regardless they went to the trials/burning’s for fun. They would play that they were witch hunters as kids and it was the profession they went into as adults. It was also likely their mission when they came to the demon realm. I cannot tell if both Phillip and Caleb experimented on themselves with gliphs and other forms of magic. I think Phillip might have been the only one to absorb palismans. If Caleb did anything to himself he made it through the... changes much more smoothly than Phillip. Caleb loved and tried to take care of cursed Phillip

Caleb originally hated witches, and was right there with Phillip on tricking, hunting, and getting rid of them. Heck he may have been the one who taught Phillip to... but then he went through a change in character. He started spending time with a wild witch whom I am guessing was A.) a Clawthorne, and B.) most definitely someone he was originally trying to catch. She foiled his plans and it became a chase, battle, dance thing. Caleb started seeing magic, the isles, and witch craft in a different light, and eventually love happened between him and Miss Clawthorne. Caleb tried to talk to Phillip about it, explain his new relationship,and how they were wrong. Phillip did not react well and was not accepting of his brothers 180 change. When Miss Clawthorne got pregnant Caleb left Phillip for good (or from his point of view until Phillip could accept his new family) and went with her. This opens up the idea that the reason Belos treated Lilith and Eda so badly, took such joy in hunting Eda, breaking Lilith, and forcing the two to fight wasn’t just because Lilith broke his nose in deadwardian times. He likely associates them with the witches who took Caleb away from him (Caleb’s own wife and child) and was taking revenge on them for it.

In the past he took revenge on Caleb. Caleb did not die from a curse; Phillip killed him. And it wasn’t an accident. It wasn’t some talk that went wrong.It wasn’t a confused gliph combo resulting in a deadly explosion. Caleb didn’t accidental fall on to a titan’s vein after Phillip shoved him in an argument, leading to Phillip braking down in regret. Phillip went after his brother, and ambushed him and his wife. He started a fire, he pulled a knife on him. Caleb still tried to reason with him and get him to stop, but to no use. Miss Clawthorne tried to save her husband but couldn’t and had to leave his body behind and flee to protect their unborn child. Phillip kept his brother’s skeleton to make into clones (Caleb’s wife could not even bury her husband).

It seems like Grimwalkers aren’t necissarly made to be key sacrifices or instruments in Belos plans. Rather he makes them out of a desire to recreate the bond he and Caleb had when they first came to the isles. Hunter is like the 17th GrimWalker Belos has made. The other 16 all looked slightly different from Hunter, and their original ages may have been older than his. Important the other 16 were not failed protospells that stopped working or disappeared at some point because Belos had not yet perfected whatever he had to do to create them. Every single one of them eventually becomes fascinated by wild magic or comes to care about the isle residents and decided they want to stop what they and Belos are doing, just like Caleb did. Belos then kills them too. He has killed so many the collector even jokes about it being a game to him. Belos assures the collector “It hurts every time he chooses to betray me”. Note he is speaking in present tense, not past tense. This is something he has come to accept will happen each time, and he will always kill them and start over. He tried to keep Hunter shut up in the castle and away from wild magic books to delay the inevitable, maybe because Hunter is the closest looking to Caleb yet. But he knew and accepted that it would come to this. He took Luz and Hunter to all those rooms because he was collecting junk for the traps. The last room he takes them to is the golden guard grave yard where he has constructed monuments not to each guards life, but to when he killed them. Belos makes the grimwalkers for companionship, but once they challenge him he ends them and forgets anything else they ever did for him. He tried to have Hunter devoured by the mindscape with no hesitation. He told Luz with no remorse “I’ll just make another one”. Hunter was a favorite toy, but still a disposable toy.

Alright let me steady my hand, an lets move on to Belos and the Collector. So the collector is the entity Belos communicates with I guessed that back in Elsewhere and else when. Back then what surprised me was that Belos had apparently acted on his own a really long time before meeting the collector. Good-bye theory that Belos was just an innocent and curious child whom some dark being corrupted. Now what surprises me is that Belos knows he is talking with the Collector and not the Titan. I really thought he genuinely believed he was carrying out the will of this realms version of God or if not him than atleast a remorseful angel. Belos is one talented lair and I both hate him and now relate to all the witches he fooled. Belos is only misunderstood by the coven members. He knows exactly what he is doing and he has NO good side.

 I also think I put together What the collector gets out of helping Belos... Belos is putting all of the Isles residents into a collection for him. The 9 covens, 9 categories. The seals, stamps of ownership. Wild witches who refuse the seals are petrified and brought into the collection as large paperweights. At the center of this all we have the 9 most talented witches, a grimwalker creation, and a human from a time long past, the prized jewels of the collection. But wait? According to this episode Belos doesn’t just want to drain the citizens of the isles of their “evil magic”, he wants to kill them all. Why would the collector let Belos get rid of his collection. Becasue the Collector is, physically speaking, a young child who is board with his current toys. He will allow Belos to get rid of them if he can replace them with new, more fun, toys. I think this is where the portal comes in. Belos may not want to invade the human realm, but the collector does. His one human is old and not likely to last much longer, so he will need another one, better yet what if he makes an entire collection of human toys.

Will Belos not be the most dangerous villain of this story? Will he die before it ends, making the Collector the final boss Luz and Co will need to defeat to stop the Day of Unity? I have long since theorized, and I still do. Will Belos be killed by the Collector once he has outlived his usefulness? Possibly. Belos may even know this is a probable end to him. If so I doubt he cares, He lives to hunt and eliminate witches. As long the witches all go Belos would probably allow the Collector to kill him, with at most a last request to have his body taken back to the human realm to be buried.

[kyriolex]

Kawaki Academy Arc: The Not-So-Haunted School

I wasn’t expecting much from this so-called horror episode, but it was a lot more entertaining than I predicted. Not because it was scary, but because it was hilarious.

So we open with Sosha telling the other kids on cleaning duty about the Mysteries of the Academy. Himawari gets the idea to have a ghost hunt, and we quickly get our horror movie roster:

Sosha, the lore master

Himawari, the kid with plot armor

The twins Ran and Suzu, who keep teasing each other about who will run away first

Kura the cat hoodie girl, who has absolutely no relation to Wasabi or cat summoning. Her specialty is scroll summoning and weapons (like Tenten), and she loves horror movies.

Ehou, who screamed and leapt into Himawari’s arms after the first story

Yuina, who is still searching for a solid personality

Kae, who doesn’t believe in ghosts but is still super stoked for a hunt

Kawaki, who is too grown-up for this but will come along if he HAS to. He’s going to scoff and roll his eyes the entire time though.

As they are planning, Shino comes in with a mop and asks the kids to please finish cleaning. The kids whine that they should be given scientific ninja tools to clean with (valid), but Shino says cleaning the school is part of training. I’m not sure if he means chores are character-building or if they’re practice for cleaning up blood and corpses after missions. Given Konoha’s culture, it could be both.

The kids dismiss Shino, and he overhears them making fun of his name and how forgettable and boring he is. Kawaki, surprisingly enough, is super polite to Shino and offers to take care of everything. (I guess Boruto told him the story of Terminator Shino and warned Kawaki not to mess with Aburames.)

Later that night, the kids meet up and walk boldly into the abandoned school building. Kawaki spots Kae sneaking away from the group and finds her plotting with Batora the butler, who is dressed as an anatomy dummy. 

She tells Kawaki her not-so-evil plan: To enact the fake mysteries for the other kids so they have a fun ghost hunt. Kawaki isn’t interested, but Kae says he needs to help her to “preserve Himawari’s innocence.” 

(FYI, the screenshots get super grainy from here on out. Sorry.)

So Kawaki, Kae, and Batora sneak around pretending to terrifying specters such as:

The moving anatomy dummies who will only chase you out of the room and no further. 

The bathroom ghost that overflows with red paint blood (The writers repeatedly specify that this is the boys’ bathroom - otherwise that “blood” would have a very different horror to it.)

The autonomous kunai in the training room that fly around with no user

Pacman Hiruzen, whose statue floats around and races through the shrubbery like a video game

Iruka’s portrait, which opens its mouth to show an Orochimaru-like tongue that licks you. Yes, really.

The mirror that transports you to the shadow realm.

Halfway through the night, Kawaki complains that he doesn’t understand why Kae is so obsessed with making these ghosts real. Batora reveals that Kae never got a proper childhood due to being a princess, so she’s living vicariously through Himawari and the others. 

Kawaki then decides to be the best ghost he can be. He and Batora hide in the shrubs and carry the Hiruzen statue on their backs while Himawari gives chase. But Himawari’s Byakugan senses plot relevance and finally decides to turn on. She realizes Kawaki is the ghost, but lies to the other kids that she couldn’t see anything.

So by the sixth ghost, the only kids left are Himawari, Ehou, and Yuina. The rest of the kids ran off like cowards at various points in the night. They check out the mirror, and suddenly a floating sheet appears above them. Kawaki and Kae compliment Batora for the neat trick, but Batora says “guys that isn’t me.”

Ehou and Yuina become so frightened by the floating sheet that they conveniently pass out in fear. Kawaki rushes to Himawari’s defense and tries to punch the bedsheet, to no avail. Kawaki, Kae, and Batora chase the slippery sheet outside into the courtyard in case it’s an assassin. Himawari hangs back and watches over her unconscious teammates.

Kawaki, Kae, and Batora catch up the bedsheet, which is empty. Then the Hiruzen statue just slams onto the ground behind them. The sheet picks up again and flies through a crack in the window back into the building. Kae freaks out and concludes ghosts are real and that she’s angered them by playing pretend. She’s no longer living vicariously - she’s in the ghost story now.

Kawaki realizes the person controlling the “ghost” must be in the faculty office, because that’s the only place the ghost hunters haven’t visited. They run into the office, where they see a shadowy figure scuttling around on all fours like that girl from the ring. Kawaki keeps trying to catch it, but the figure is too fast...until it runs into a bunch of glow-in-the-dark paint that Batora had left earlier on the floor.

The now-glowing figure stands up and turns out to be...Shino. He asks what they’re doing in school so late and why they put open paint buckets in the middle of the floor. Kae says they were ghost hunting, and Shino says “Ghosts? Are you...talking about these guys?” He brings out his shimmering bug hive, which does indeed look ghostly in the moonlight.

Shino explains that he was doing his own cleaning around the grounds - he can’t exactly lecture kids about chores if he slacks off himself. The bugs help him carry supplies like sheets and sponges and such. So basically, Shino’s been cleaning the school occasionally at night, but he’s so quiet and stealthy that any witnesses of his cleaning assumed it was ghost activity.

The anime doesn’t actually explain the mysteries beyond that, so I’m going to do my best theories:

The moving dummies - The bugs moving the dummies around for cleaning

Haunted toilets - That’s probably bad plumbing

Autonomous kunai - I’m guessing that’s just Shino working out after he’s done cleaning

Floating Hiruzen statue - Maybe this is his version of weight training? I don’t know why else it would be necessary to move a statue to clean, even outdoors.  

Iruka portrait - We know from earlier episodes that the kids gossip about poor Iruka a lot, so the idea of a haunted portrait is probably more gossip, unrelated to Shino

The mirror - Maybe the kids saw one of Shino’s bug clones polishing the mirrors and then dissipating, and they thought the clone disappeared into the mirror. Kawaki’s “ghost” was just the bugs carrying a sheet around.

The office ghost - It seems Shino was doing that sprint scrubbing thing to clean the floors instead of using a mop. 

Still not sure why Shino was doing all that cleaning in the dark. I suspect Aburame eyes are really sensitive to light and he just prefers cleaning by moonlight when it’s his turn to play janitor. I...hope the teachers take turns cleaning. I know Shino’s a workaholic, but it would be sad if he did this by himself every night.

Anyway, Himawari and her now conscious teammates finally catch up in time to see the glowing Shino. Yuina and Ehou run outside screaming, while Himawari casually tells Shino-sensei hi. 

The next day, the kids are all gossiping about the masked, glowing ghost. Shino thankfully isn’t mad, but rather amused and a little grateful the kids are talking about him at all. 

Meanwhile, Himawari and Kawaki chat in the corner, and Himawari reveals she totally figured out Kawaki was the ghost but didn’t want to ruin his and Kae’s effort. Kawaki thanks her for being mature about it, and the two level up in sibling bonding. The end.

[aro-aizawa]

Locked Out - Chapter 4

A Danny Phantom / My Hero Academia Crossover, set mid season 2 and pre-canon respectively.

[Chapter 1] | [Chapter 3] | [On AO3] | [Chapter 5]

Danny was turning into a nerd - he could feel it in his bones.

He’d conducted so much research to prepare himself for going to Japanese Middle School. Kirika had reminded him that there would be a lot of differences that wouldn’t occur to him until he was in the moment, especially because Danny’s concept of Japanese culture was incredibly limited to some samurai inspired movies and video games not actually made in Japan, so there was definitely going to be some inaccuracies. 

The little details were probably what caught him out the most; the fact that teachers were the ones that changed between classrooms; that students would put on indoor shoes when they arrived; students cleaned the school themselves instead of janitors doing it for them; there would be no cafeterias so he’d have to bring a packed lunch. 

One of the biggest things he was worried about getting used to that he wouldn’t have to dash out of class at the drop of a hat with an excuse on his tongue. The lack of ghost attacks was both a relief and something that kept him on edge. He hadn’t had a solid break from them since he died, with the longest period being a week, and even then it had been a loose week because the Box Ghost “attacked” three times.

So. Yeah. Danny was nervous. He hadn’t been expecting to get a second first day at middle school in his life, but here he was, wearing a school uniform and flipping Kirika off as she took a teasing ‘first day at school’ photo which had her cackling. She threw him the bento she’d made and told him that he’d be expected to make some of his own lunches. 

Kirika had already walked the route with him so he knew where he was going, but if not, he’d printed out a map of it and stuck it in his hand nerdbook, where he was storing all of his ‘please don’t vivisect me i am not an alien’ research. See? Nerd. Sam was going to bully him so hard when he got back and showed her it. 

Though Danny had tried his hardest to reign in Kirika’s lawbreaking tendencies, she’d apparently managed to sweet talk her way into adding Danny’s ‘quirk’ to the national registry. It had been necessary for his fake visa to be considered valid, it had been registered to be as vague as it could legally be so that he could handwave things if it didn’t line up to his definition. 

Kirika told him that she’d registered it as ‘Phantom: gives the holder the powers of a ghost’, which was about as vague as it could be. Though to their advantage, the registry didn’t store the identities of whoever had what quirks to protect people, they used identification codes to verify that yes, this quirk has been registered. It had been an essential to cement his place in the universe, as pretty much everyone had access to the registry but could only look up anything if you had that specific ID code. Even then there was another layer of security that you could only access the details outside of its name if you high level access apparently. 

But back to the first day of school. Danny had hidden himself in the closest alley to the school, trying his hardest to calm his nerves. It was actually surprising just how nervous this made him feel, he’d rarely been all that nervous about normal things since he got his powers. All the things that made him nervous to this level had been directly related to his powers, or to his ghost hunting. 

This was just a normal first day, he didn’t even have to make a positive impression! He was just there to fit in, to make sure that people wouldn’t look too closely at him and Kirika and go investigating how suspicious they were, and that one in fact was a criminal and the other didn’t officially exist in this world. 

It wasn’t even that he was scared of being bullied or an outcast either! He’d been bullied by Dash for as long as he could remember, and it stopped being hurtful after dying. Danny’d been a bit of a loner before he befriended Tucker, but that hadn’t been very long in elementary school. 

“What are you doing?” A voice from behind him asked. 

Danny yelped and almost jumped out of his skin, he whirled round to see where it had come from to see an exhausted looking, purple haired teen wearing the same uniform as him. “Um.”

The teen in question raised his eyebrow and looked at Danny. “If you’re new, word of advice, people are going to tell you to ignore me or stay away from me. If you want to fit in, you better listen to them.” 

Danny couldn’t help but stare slightly at him in response, that…was one of the most puzzling things he’d heard. 

“You’d best get to class, we’re running late as it is.” The boy said, walking around Danny and towards the school. 

In a way, that encounter had somehow given him the courage to follow the boy in through the gate and to the entrance. He found his foot locker and put on the slippers he’d been given by the school, putting his shoes in the locker. Thankfully, Kirika had asked for a map of the school for Danny, so he didn’t have too much trouble getting to the teacher’s lounge he’d been asked to go to when he arrived. 

The teacher himself — Kawakami-sensei — didn’t seem all that happy to be doing their job. When Danny introduced himself, the teacher started to speak slowly and simply to him, obviously underestimating Danny’s fluency and intelligence. Which would be fair enough if he was actually speaking Japanese without the quirk perk, but it still was rather insulting if he was being honest. 

He simply didn’t get a good vibe from the guy, and for a split second, Danny felt a pang of homesickness. He’d never thought that he’d actually miss Mr Lancer but here he was. 

Danny followed the teacher at an even pace to their classroom, listening to the man as he said that he wasn’t expected to have a perfectly aligned curriculum, but to try and follow along best he could regardless. 

He didn’t hold out much hope for getting good grades if he was honest. One of the few things he’d found out was that Japan focused a lot more on education, so their education system and overall grade average were generally higher than almost all American educations. Danny struggled getting a passing grade back in America, trying to get good grades here sounded like trying to climb a sheer mounting with no experience hiking or rock climbing. 

It wasn’t all that long before they reached the classroom, where they heard students being rowdy and talking to each other through the door. The noise dimmed slightly when the teacher opened the door and registered his presence, but some students didn’t seem to care, going back to their conversation while sat on the desks. 

“Quiet please, class is starting.” The teacher started, reverting his to natural speaking speed. “We have a new student with us for the rest of the year, he’s coming to us from America so do be patient with the language barrier.” The teacher then turned to Danny, returning to his slow speech.

It was still insulting. Logically he knew it was likely a kindness, but the way it was executed seemed rather belittling of his intelligence. Realistically, if Danny had just moved from America he wouldn’t know much beyond generic greetings and random phrases, not to mention he’d butcher pronunciations constantly. He’d been so overwhelmingly lucky that there was an built-in translation feature of Kirika’s quirk. 

That being said though, being so patronising to Danny’s face was rude, so of course Danny was going to try and throw the attitude in Kawakami’s face. 

“Hey there, my name is Danny Fenton, or Fenton Danny as you guys would say.” He started facing the class and keeping an eye on the way the teacher startled at his perfect Japanese. “Call me Fenton if you’d like, but I really prefer to go by Danny. Apologies that I’m coming in so late in the year, but it wasn’t really in my control. Though I’m new around here, I hope we can all get along.” He bowed his head slightly.

The teacher cleared their throat after a moment, when it was clear that Danny was done talking. He didn’t seem to acknowledge that he’d been presumptuous but his body language was clearly awkward enough that he knew he’d messed up. “Right, well, Fenton if you could please pick one of the spare seats, and we will begin registration.”

Danny would have liked to be at the back or near the window, but there were only two spare seats - one in the front near the door, and the other in the centre of the room. He decided quickly and made his way to the centre seat, noting as he went to it that the purple haired kid who spoke to him in the alley was in this class. Huh.

Through registration, Danny tried to remember as many names as he could. He’d never been very good at that, but as if to prove his budding nerdism, he realised halfway through that he’d started to write all the names down in his nerdbook. 

“...Shinsou Hitoshi?” the teacher spoke hesitantly for some reason. 

The purple haired boy replied with a curt, “Present.” 

The interaction confused him. Honestly, he knew that being unfamiliar with the society would trip him up but it seemed like he’d only seen Shinsou interaction with people twice and both baffled him - that talk in the alley and answering the teacher. 

“If you’re new, word of advice, people are going to tell you to ignore me or stay away from me. If you want to fit in, you better listen to them.” 

What did that mean?

He tried to focus in class. He really did, but it wasn’t surprising to anyone that he couldn’t. He was crowded around between classes and spoken to as if he’s the most exciting thing to happen to the school since sliced bread. 

Some ask uncomfortable questions regarding his reasons why he’s here so late in the year. He’s not sure if it’s a normal thing here, but a lot of the questions started to feel rather invasive to a level he wasn’t okay with, so he tried his best to dodge them. 

He was almost glad when lunch rolled around and people started to disperse from the classroom with some staying where they were. He’d known that there wasn’t a cafeteria in the school, but it was still weird to see people openly eating in a classroom and so many with packed lunches. Danny found his eyes following the one person who hadn’t approached him and ends up following. 

“Hey Shinsou, wait up!” He called out, his new classmates lingering gave him a look. He vaguely heard someone whisper to their friend ‘no one warned the new guy?’, but he ignored it. 

Shinsou didn’t stop at the call, but did slow down enough to raise an eyebrow at Danny. “Didn’t I tell you that you should stay away from me?” 

“You did, but you’re also the only person who hasn’t asked me any uncomfortable questions or badgered me nonstop.” Danny shrugs. “If you don’t want to talk to me, fair enough but I’d like to sit with you anyway, if only to get away from everyone else.”

Shinsou seems to consider it before shrugging. “Suit yourself, but you don’t know what you’re doing.” 

Danny rolls his eyes. “What I’m doing is dodging a bullet, I have a feeling that if I stayed there or stumbled upon the most crowded areas I’d be swarmed and could barely eat my food. No thanks.” 

It was really hard to read Shinsou’s expression. Danny couldn’t tell if he really was pissed by his unwelcome company, but his body language didn’t indicate that he was angry that Danny had tagged along. Danny decided that he’d let Shinsou be the one to start up conversation when they sat down, which they did after a long while. 

Shinsou had lead them seemingly to the back of the school, an area that didn’t see much in the way of traffic or cleaning if they were going off the grime level. Shinsou sped up slightly and jumped up on the school wall, turning and sitting on it as he raised a brow at Danny as if challenging him to do the same. It was a rather high wall, perhaps just below shoulder high, but it was no problem for Danny. 

He wasn’t sure if using his “quirk” would seem like showing off though, so he just followed Shinsou’s lead and copied him with only a little exertion. He pulled his backpack off his back and took out his bento, glad that Kirika had included a fork instead of forcing him to use chopsticks. He wasn’t quite ready to embarrass himself in front of any of his classmates just yet. I’d happen eventually, he knew, but doing it the first day wasn’t his best idea. 

They ate in silence for a while, which was fine with Danny. It game him time to eat, if Shinsou didn’t want to talk at all, then that was fine. Danny could try and get a nap in maybe. But just as Danny was finishing up, Shinsou finally started to speak, seemingly having eaten slowly.

“You should stay away from me, you know.”

Danny couldn’t help but roll his eyes. “Yeah, you said that before. Any reason why in particular, or are you anti-social?”

“I have a bit of reputation around here. My quirk scares people, so they don’t take the risk to interact with me. If you stick around me, they’re going to treat you the same as they do me.”

“Eh, who cares? I got bullied all the time back home, a big meathead jock called Dash. He’d stuff me in a locker constantly, and got away with it because he was on the football team. Did give me a thick skin though.” It didn’t, that was the death that had. Hard to angst over being bullied after genuinely dying. “Besides, if it’s a choice between enduring awkward questions and sitting in silence with you, dude, then I think it’s a really easy choice.”

“You don’t even know what my quirk does. For all you know, it’d be your worst nightmare if I used it on you.” 

“Dude, that’s against the law. There’s no way you’d be dumb enough to do that, even if you wanted to. What would you get out of it? If you really want me gone, just tell me. But if you’re struggling to understand that I genuinely do prefer hanging out with you over them, then try me. If I run away screaming, you have full permission to deck me.”

Shinsou was silent for a while, staring at Danny with pursed lips. Danny just wrapped up his bento box and put it away before turning to face Shinsou head on. After a moment or two Shinsou decided. 

“Brainwashing.” Shinsou visibly braced himself, not looking at Danny while he spoke as he clenched his box in a tight grip. “If you respond to me, I can put you under my control and make you do what I say.”

Danny _did _blink at that. It…wasn’t perfect but it was almost eerily similar to possessing someone. “Is that why our homeroom teacher was hesitant to say your name during registration today?” 

“Yep, they usually skip it and just mark me down if they see me in my seat. You going to leave me alone now?” 

“Nope!” Danny grinned. “I’m staying, but do you want to know what my quirk is?”

“Do I have a choice?”

“Hmm yeah? I mean I was just gonna tell you that I kind of relate to yours in a way? Not to devalue your struggles or anything, it’s just that there’s an aspect of my quirk that I can use in a similar way to yours.”

Shinsou’s brow furrowed as he stared at Danny with confused suspicion, as if Danny was going to try and pull something over on him. Danny couldn’t help but wonder if Shinsou was a naturally distrusting person or if it was a behaviour that he’d learned. 

“Okay,” Danny started, taking the lack of answer as an invitation to go ahead. “I call it ‘Phantom’. It lets me do whatever a ghost can, fly, go through walls, disappear, and a few other things. It’s…well, it’s kind of powerful and that’s not me trying to brag, but there’s one aspect that always makes me nervous and that’s. Well, I have the ability to possess someone.” 

Now it was Shinsou’s turn to blink. “What?”

Danny had no doubt that if more people in Amity knew that ghosts could genuinely possess people, they’d be a lot more scared of him and the other ghosts, but it didn’t seem to be something that people had caught onto. It would definitely impact how people viewed him, so he did relate. Sam and Tucker hadn’t shown much of an opinion on his ability, but the way that Danny felt about other ghosts possessing him _did _freak him out somewhat. 

Though that was probably the trauma speaking. 

“Yeah, you know like ghosts possessing people and getting exorcised of them? Those ghost films and stories where people get possessed and start killing people? Well, I can do that - the possessing, not the killing - which is why I don’t tend to broadcast it, and only really do it if I need to.”

Shinsou stared at him as if he didn’t believe him. Which was fair really, it wasn’t like he could prove it without a willing volunteer. Kirika had definitely been the exception. 

Danny floated a little bit off the wall and laid back. “Look, if you don’t believe me, that’s fine. If you want me to leave you alone, that’s fine. I’ll just go chill on the roof or something until the bell rings, but I’m not gonna avoid you because your quirk is scary.”

In the end, Danny couldn’t figure out what Shinsou internally decided, but in the silence after Danny heard him go through his bag, he decided to have a doze. 

“Wake me when lunch is over.” Danny threw out, only half meaning it. He doubted that he’d actually fall asleep, but dozing while floating would always be relaxing in a way that Danny couldn’t quite explain. 

It was different to regular dozing. He didn’t feel the pressure of something below him, he hung weightless in the air as if he was floating on the surface of a pool. It was always so serene and gave him a sense of tranquillity that was unbelievably hard to get elsewhere. He barely ever got to enjoy it, he’d never dared to take the chance if his parents weren’t away for the weekend, too afraid they’d catch him floating. 

He dozed for a long while until Shinsou grabbed his attention and told him that class was going to start again soon. They walked back to class in silence, Shinsou seemingly in thought and Danny trying to ignore the way people gossiped about him around them, and hoping that he could sit undisturbed until class started again. 

He did not get to be undisturbed. 

“Psst, Fenton!” The girl next to him whispered, Aoki if he remembered correctly, as she leaned over the aisle and looked at Shinsou. “Stay away from Shinsou, he’ll brainwash you into doing thing!” 

“No? He won’t?” Danny rebutted her easily. See the thing is, Danny was getting frustrated. He had this…this thing where if enough people kept repeatedly telling him the same thing, sometimes he’d go do the thing out of pure spite, and it very rarely lead to him actually listening to them because if he did, the annoyance would just continue to grate him to a painful degree. 

It was also the fact that this universe had a very clear law prohibiting quirk usage on someone else. Sure it was mostly a case-by-case basis, but the fasted way to get in major trouble was to use your quirk maliciously on another person. 

But apparently people forgot that no one actually wanted to get in major legal trouble, and break that strict law unless they had a really good reason for it. Even for teenagers there were harsh repercussions to it, putting a black mark on your permanent record, meaning that any reputable school would refuse their admittance unless in the most exceptional of circumstances. 

The girl shot him a pitying look. “It’ll be a matter of time, it’ll probably be subtle, like making you befriend him. Get out while you can is all I’m saying.”

“Oh yeah?” Danny replied, raising his voice and purposefully gaining the attention of those in class already. “See there’s this thing called the law, people don’t usually break it unless they had a very good reason to. Shinsou hasn’t used it so far, which is a miracle considering how everyone treats him, think how easy it would be and then think of how hard it would be to resist that?

“Please, if I had a guaranteed way to get people to stop bothering me, I’d use it in a heartbeat. Shinsou is a good person, and I’m not gonna sit here and listen to people telling me to stay away. I’ll decide who I’m going to hang out with, thank you very much, but feel free to give me the same treatment as Shinsou if it’ll make you all feel better!” 

Danny ended his announcement with a roll of his eyes, sitting back in his seat after he realised that he’d stood up at some point. He was just so frustrated by the distrust and general attitude of the student body, he wasn’t naive to think that the boy was a saint. He was just tired of people writing him off as a criminal without having any proof except for his vibes. 

So focused on blocking out the class and getting his things out for the lesson, he missed the purple haired boy stare at him before looking away with a slight smile.

[Chapter 5]