#its been fun :] but nothing i really wanna post anywhere
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harvestmoth · 9 months ago
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aha i lied. april fools.
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worlds-worst-ships · 6 months ago
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Welcome to the home of the world's worst ships!
Hello there, I'm Jack Goodwin and this absolute affront to the natural order that I call a blog is where I take a break from the insane content I normally make where you only have one job... to have fun.
Wanna stay up to date on my video/.streaming content? Go follow @maji-man. Or just click HERE to see all my socials in one list.
Here's a post where I explain the point of the blog. I highly suggest you read it twice or more to make sure you understand.
Be warned: If you neglect this post and run your mouth in my comments, chances are I'll make fun of you in my videos and streams. Now then, down to business.
Are there two characters that absolutely should not be anywhere near each other, to the point where one should be getting a restraining order? Are there pairings in fiction that you couldn't be paid a quadrillion rubles to come up with on your own? Are you sick of all these picket-fence, vanilla pudding, ERENxMIKASA snoozefests that plague the internet? If so, you've come to the right place. Get your kissy-kissy lips on, find a slightly uncomfortable chair and LETS GET SHIPPING!!!
I have only FOUR RULES HERE:
You can say whatever you want here, so long as;
1. Its not discriminatory
Any sort of phobia/ism here is not welcome. This blog is for everyone, regardless of ethnicity, orientation or gender identity.
2. Its a joke,
and clearly a joke. We poke fun at each other here. Lets keep it fun.
3. Its true.
I have the power of google, and any misinformation will be swiftly corrected. When you are corrected, either accept it or be blocked. Misinformation and straight up lies are not welcome here.
4: You speak with the understanding that these characters aren't real people, nor do they represent them
These are cartoons. Works of fiction. They're not real. Please keep any deep-seated obsession with character's ethnicity, sexuality, age, background etc to yourself. Acting holier-than-thou and making that the subject of your personal issue with my posts doesn't make you a hero, nor is that the groundbreaking opinion you think it is, it just makes the jokes awkward and uncomfortable for many people here.
Aaaaanyways, now we've got that out of the way (and yes, I will add more rules as the need arises, don't test me)
I'll mostly be using the absolute maelstrom of doodoo I call a brain to come up with ideas, but if you'd like to submit some ideas of your own, feel free. Send it to my ASK box. Nothing illegal, past a certain point, please.
Oh, and the ask criteria/format is in the linked post below. (Anonymous asks are and will always be turned off, cuz I know that this site is full of pussies who can't talk shit on main)
JUST IN CASE YOU DIDN'T READ THAT POST, AS I KNOW MOST OF YOU WON'T: If you do not follow that exact format, I WILL DELETE YOUR ASKS ON SIGHT.
I REPEAT: I will not even CONSIDER posting them.
FUN FACT: After having this blog for multiple months with anonymous asks turned off, I haven't gotten a single hate message (other than that one kid who got made a fool out of). This is why they're off, in case you wondered.
Its also worth mentioning, some of you are new to the concept of comedy, so I'll write it nice and big for you (if you know what a crackship/joke is, then skip this paragraph): THIS IS A JOKE BLOG. A GIMMICK BLOG. A COMEDY BLOG. I DO NOT CARE EVEN SLIGHTLY ABOUT SHIPPING AS A CONCEPT MUCH LESS DO I EVEN KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT 9/10 OF THE CHARACTERS YOU'LL SEE HERE, SO IM JUST MAKING J O K E S. IF YOU ARE OFFENDED, THEN YOU HAVE KNOWINGLY CHOSEN TO BE OFFENDED WHICH IS ENTIRELY YOUR FAULT. THANK YOU :)
I REPEAT this is a CRACKSHIP BLOG, so if you're deeply hurt by any of my polls, just know that nothing here reflects me as a person because none of what I post is serious. If anything you see after reading that causes you any emotional distress, it IS NOT my fault. Its funny, but its not my fault.
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kkbardd · 3 months ago
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was your hand inside the box..😭? why were there wooden skewers in a box? i have so many questions yet so little answers..
also sorry for disappearing </3 school suddenly decided to get 5x harder and I have 0 time for anything but sleep
+ you are making me debate whether or not to watch jojo truly the best promoter of everything by just making it yuri-fied
omg isopod!!!! dw abt school stuff, im really busy myself for the same reason!
ok so ive been making this 1/4 bjd of an oc (the succubus i posted a while ago) as a side hobby lately. ill post pictures once i finish everything, but basically what happened was i needed to spray seal all the unstrung parts after blushing them. so i was taking a bunch of wooden kebab skewers and stabbing them into a cardboard box to hold up the parts in the air. (that way i can spray them while holding the skewers, not touching the sealant & have them dry in the air etc etc.) well of course while stabbing them into the box i got a little careless and did it with my arm over the previous skewers andddd... bam theres a skewer stuck in my hand! thank god it didnt go all the way through but it was about 1-2cm in and after pulling it out i had this huge hole in my right hand lol! afterwards (and still kinda now) I can't put much strength into it and it hurts if I do too much. i probably hit a nerve or something!
its crazy though bc a ton of other bad stuff happened right after (that's way too much to talk abt) but i ended up having to get IV's in both my wrists at the EC which made my hands even more unusable 😔 I'm doing way better now but bc of all that, the skewer incident really became the least of my worries!
I am always a promoter of jojo!!!!! its so funny you say that though, because i had the exact same interaction w my best friend who's also a lesbian. (she was the one i spent 50 mins in voice notes explaining the plot of part 4 just with the change that kira's a lesbian now LOL) if u love yuri and wanna get into jojo i STRONGLY recommend part 6!! its prison lesbians!! you really don't need to watch the previous parts to watch it, most of everything u can pick up on by context clues. it's my absolute favorite part, and the way women are written in it is really good!! i got my friend on it and she loves it despite knowing nothing of jojo before.
i love jojo so much but i must say that especially in the early parts, the women are either nonexistent or badly written. its only when you get to part 6 that they get fully fleshed out (and really well i gotta add)! but even despite that i really really love jojo for all that it is!! its such a unique show and you get so many unique and interesting moments that u really can't see anywhere else. i mean who else has a plotline where u have to fight vincent van goh made from a stand called bohemian rhapsody!? its crazy! (and ofc just know that jojo is a fighting show first n foremost, so while there can be some subcontext that makes people ship characters, there's not that much actual romance, much less queer romance between characters to speak of ☝😌)
i would definitely recommend part 6 if you wanna see strong, complex female characters with an amazing plotline. and if u like mystery with a patrick bateman-type villain, part 4 is still really fun to watch (ESPECIALLY if you watch it while imagining kira as a lesbian <33 )
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creature-phases · 8 months ago
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Backslide Analysis
I want to preface this analysis by saying that Backslide is about two things, one more so than the other. Surface level it is about Tyler being afraid of his career with Twenty One Pilots failing.
On a deeper level, it is about the cycle of depression. Here’s the fun thing about clinical depression, it does not go away. Sure you can heal, get better, and learn how to manage it so it isn’t so overwhelming, but it never truly disappears. I’m sure I’m not alone in saying that when you have depression there is a fear that you will slip back into your worst moments.
This is something I think Josh captures well with the music video. When he posted it to his Instagram he put the caption “This song is really meaningful to me.” If I had to guess I’d say Tyler probably laid out the album and let Josh pick whatever track he wanted. Probably with the exception of Next Semester since Tyler knew what he wanted to do with that one.
I’d wager that this is either Josh’s favorite song on the album or the one that spoke to him the most or likely both.
One last thing. Twenty One Pilots has always been a way for me to deal with my own mental health issues. When I pick apart their lyrics it is with heavy bias towards myself. There is a overlay of “if I wrote this this is what I would have meant”.
Anyway onto the analysis
[Intro]
I don't wanna
[Verse 1]
“Rat race, place to place, adding weight/Tendencies on repeat, innit”
This plays into the cycle of everyday life especially with depression. How it feels like you are just going with the motions and how that begins to weigh on you. This sort of monotony causes you to fall back into old habits, or maybe the fact that you are just going through the motions is the bad habit.
“Benefit from a shoe with no lace”
I’m not confident in what I think this line is saying. My interpretation of this line literally is that having shoes with no laces means there is one less thing you need to do, one less thing to think about, which can be a benefit or a detriment. A less literal interpretation is this line being more sarcastic and it being more like saying he feels like a shoe with no lace. That part of him is missing or that something is wrong. There isn’t a benefit.
��Take the seat with the crease in it”
This goes back into the discussion of cycles and going through the motions. The seat having a crease implies that he sits in that seat a lot. It’s part of the routine. This connects directly the line “Tendencies on repeat, innit”. In both its rhyme and its meaning.
“I don't mind if it's lonely, I don't mind if it's fair/I don't care, you control me, leading me anywhere”
To me, this reads as denial. He does care, a lot actually, but he’s trying not to, or he’s trying to convince his dark thoughts (Blurryface) that he doesn’t care. When you let depression and anxiety control you you try to convince yourself that you’re okay with that. That nothing is wrong.
“I don't wanna backslide to where I've started from/There's no chance I will shake this again”
When I first heard the “I don’t want to backslide” part I thought he meant his career, but the second half of this pre-chorus takes me away from that thought completely. I am of the firm belief this is saying “I am terrified of relapsing because I don’t know if I have the strength to get better again.”
The definition of “backslide” according to Merriam-Webster (yes I’m pulling out all the stops) is to “lapse morally or in the practice of religion” or “to revert to a worse condition”. I’m ignoring the religion aspect because I personally do not view TOP through a religious lens. I think the fact that this is the specific word choice means this song is very much focused on backsliding in mental health.
“'Cause I feel the pull, water's over my head”
If you listen to Twenty One Pilots you know that Tyler Joseph loves his water references. People have already connected this to the pre-chorus of Fall Away which I do agree with. This song and this album in general seems to be a love letter to everything that came before it.
Have you ever been caught in a rough wave? Because it is not fun and it can actually be terrifying. This line is about Tyler feeling the tug of old dark thoughts pulling him under the water. People will often describe depression as the feeling of drowning because it is a very apt description.
“Strength enough for one more time/reach my hand above the tide”
Struggling with mental health is exhausting and there are plenty of times where you have the thought “I don’t think I can do this anymore.” You don’t think you have the strength to keep reaching out for anything to grab onto.
“I'll take anything you have/If you could throw me a line/I should've loved you better”
I’m of the firm belief that a big part of this song is Tyler talking to his younger self and Blurryface. I know I’ve seen people say “Oh, ‘you’ is god obviously” which it very well could be, but that just isn’t the case for me.
I relate this to the feeling that my depression is kind of in cahoots with my younger self. I picture it as being willing to take any beating just so you can get out of this one hole. Obviously, no one is at fault for their depression and how that takes away their childhood, but it often feels that way. Like you are personally responsible and your younger self resents you for it.
I think a lot of people hate their younger self. You hear it often people saying “I was so weird back then” or anything like that. But those thoughts just make it all worse. I think in order to heal you need to realize that you often need to love who you were.
I also come at this from the perspective of a trans person. So part of that self hatred comes from that. Hating the fact you didn’t get to grow up as who you actually are. But once again, that isn’t your younger self’s fault. It isn’t your fault either.
“Do you think that now's the time/you should let go?”
This is the response to the previous lines by those dark thoughts. Give up, let the wave drag you down. Aren’t tired, just accept it. Which is then followed by
“It's over my head”
Which implies that Tyler listened.
[Verse 2]
“Bad place, on a hundred-dollar bass/kinda wishin' that I never did "Saturday"
I view this line as being about No Phun Intended. If you’ve listened to that album you know just how dark of a place someone has to be in to write that kind of stuff and sing it the way Tyler did. Also considering that Tyler was a high school student it wouldn’t surprise me if he had a super cheap bass. If not about No Phun Intended then I would say it would be about the Self-Titled album or Regional At Best for very similar reasons.
This connects directly to the idea of not wanting to Backslide. That fear of falling back into your worst moments. Not wanting to be in the headspace he was in when he wrote those songs.
This is then somewhat contradicted by him saying that he sort of wishes he didn’t put out “Saturday”. One thing I will say is I always appreciate Tyler’s sincerity when it comes to regret and anxiety. This is most blantant on Blurryface which makes a lot of sense. Considering this song is sort of the return of Blurryface it is even more appropriate. I’m not a huge fan of Saturday. Not because its “different” to what they usually put out, but I just don’t vibe with the music. It has some great lines but it does admittedly feel too produced.
I think part of this line is showing that the backlash from Scaled and Icy, which is best represented by Saturday, got to Tyler. He is only human. He has been very upfront in saying that he does, in fact, care what people think. This line is actually perfect at encapsulating his anxieties combined with his desire to not go back to a dark place.
Maybe he also feels like he wasn’t true to himself in that song, or that the response to Saturday is part of what caused his fear of backsliding.
“‘Is that a stain? You should change/Are you doin' good?/Did you solve all of your problems?’”
I’m very much of the opinion that the boy at the lemonade stand is meant to represent a younger version of Tyler. I often picture how my younger self would react to me now. I know one of the main questions young me would have would be “did we get better?” Then there is an even younger version of me that has no idea what he’s in for. He would represent “Is that a stain/you should change”. This is obviously referring to the back paint Tyler uses that represents his depression and anxiety. That younger version of him doesn’t know what is in store, so the paint is seen innocently as a stain.
“Thanks for asking, in a way, but/accidentally uncovered a new one yesterday”
Tyler has talked in the past about the cycle of getting better and then falling back. This line most directly connects to what I was talking about in my intro about the fact that depression never really goes away. Life goes on and new problems arise.
“What happened to what I brushed under the rug?”
This alludes to the fact that Tyler never truly solved some of his problems. Instead he just brushed them under the rug, but it didn’t stay under the rug,
“I used to be the champion of a world you can't see/now I'm drowning in logistics”
I’ve seen this connected to both Bandito and Forest as both have a bridge that focuses on Tyler being in control of a world and the destruction of said world. When you have depression you tend to be in your head a lot, and when you are a creative like Tyler, you are in it even more so. I heavily relate to creating worlds inside your head to feel a sense of control. There are ways I could relate this to the lore ™ but I’m not going to for consistency's sake.
The part about drowning in logistics. Creating a world as in-depth and with as many moving part as Tyler did is exhausting. Creating can be exhausting. You can get to a point where you over think it. It all ties back to the fact that Tyler could destroy this world.
“I don't mind if it's lonely (It's over my head)/I don't mind if it's fair (You should let go)/I don't care, you control me (It's over my head)/Leading me anywhere”
The earlier denial is being challenged and their is this sense of giving up.
“I don't wanna backslide”
The outro cycles back into the beginning with the “I don’t wanna-”. The fact that it is also lower and not as audible reflects the defeated nature of the song.
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sigmabateman · 1 year ago
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thank you so much @velvetcrowbar444 for tagging me to talk about 5 things im obsessed with at the moment!!
this got longer than i anticipated so im putting it under the cut, but for simplicity's sake i'll tag people up here: @nights-decay, @boycentriccplot, @flaming-tsunami, @sourgelatin no pressure though of course!
persona 5... ok i have to be honest ive been really reluctant to talk about this on here and its why ive been quiet the past at least week or so. no idea why. i guess cause its so different from the stuff i usually post about that i feel like, embarrassed? but i started playing persona 5 royal around may and really liked it but i didnt have the time to properly get into it until now and it has completely taken over my life entirely without me even realising. to be honest i could obsess over like a rock on the ground if i saw it at the right time in my life but hands down persona 5 is one the best if not the best game ive ever played in my life. the story is engaging, the characters are distinctive and realistic and i really really care about all of them, the gameplay is so much fun and combat is buttery fucking smooth like nothing ive ever played before, the music is top tier and what got me interested in the game in the first place, and the ART DIRECTION. it speaks for itself to be honest ESPECIALLY compared to the older games. i was shocked starting persona 4 because of how different it is to persona 5 like, persona 5 has SUCH a distinct visual identity as well as tone, themes, imagery etc it is all just so stunning and perfect and i want to live in it. but i think about it so often like literally 24/7 that i may as well be. i <3 persona 5 and i <3 YUSUKE KITAGAWA. he's definitely my favourite character and he came out of NOWHERE but hes actually everything in the world to me. one of the characters ever.
persona 4 is it a copout to say that? i did try and condense both games into one bullet point but 1. they're such a mainstay in my life right now i was struggling to think of more points and 2. it kind of lost its precision and didn't effectively convey just how personapilled i am right now. i originally wasn't gonna play 4, all i knew is that it was more difficult and less good so i thought i should stay away. but if you go anywhere persona-related on the internet (which i would warn against, the fandom is a fucking cesspit the likes of which i havent seen in a long time as an obscure-shit-enjoyer) you'll quickly run into adachi. and as a lover of men with high-pitched voices and sexypedia entries... i couldn't stay away. before even starting the game i had made a d6 and d20 with different adachis on each face so really it was just a matter of time. and you know what... it's not that bad. the graphics were a SHOCKING step down but i find the low(er) poly style really charming. the adachi model is too cute T_T whenever i see it in the game world i just wanna sit with it for ages. i wonder if i could get it like 3d printed so i could keep him on my desk with me at all times... its bad for me ! the combat is fucking clunky espeically compared to 5 and i kind of hate it but that just makes it more rewarding when i can finally stop LOL. some of the characters (especially the main few (yosuke, chie, yukiko)) took a bit to grow on me but its kind of sweet.. its like authentic.. our relationship is growing as i get to know them better... but dojima and nanako ive loved since i first set eyes on them. too cute. it makes me feel so fatherless. its like.. a lot more magnetic than i expected it to be. i love it even with all its flaws. i saw a meme about it being like twin peaks and thats kind of so real. and you know i love a murder mystery... so yeah tldr i like persona now. but its hard to talk about it on here because it is such a big fandom but not like an active one like spiderman or like good omens or whatever slightly more normal people are watching so its kind of intimidating. maybe ill get over myself, maybe ill go silent for 3 months until i get into something new. we'll see i guess LOL
my gender identity TUMBLR MOMENT I KNOW but i dont know.. ive had a lot of time to myself recently and its kind of brought things to the surface that i just didnt have time or space to think about before. turns out there was a LOT OF STUFF i was repressing without even knowing. like that tweet 'im probably nonbinary but i have a job so idrc about that rn'. i posted on instagram "gender around cis people: boy, gender around trans people: girlboy, gender by myself: computer program" and that kind of sums it up i think. can i coin like.. complicatedgender. where your answer to the question "whats your gender?" is "it's complicated..." cause thats me. its just COMPLICATED okay!!!! but my pronouns havent changed or anything so its chilllllll
going to bed at a reasonable time. i phrased that like a joke answer but its true. i downloaded pokemon sleep and now i go to bed at 11:30pm cause at 11 i get a notification saying my pokemon are sleepy and shit i gotta take care of my pokemon!! i dont even know if its doing me any good to be honest like i dont feel much better when i wake up but making myself get into bed and shut my eyes means more thinking time and to be honest my favourite activity is thinking. even if as silly as it sounds i never give myself time to do it. its playing a weirdly big role in my life rn so yeah id say im obsessed with it!!!
this asmr video. im secretly always posting about asmr so really i could just say that, but like, ASMR | The Mortician (No Talking – You're Dead) specifically is such a mainstay i can feel its influence seeping into my life like an infection. this video would actually show up in my recommended for YEARS but i never watched it. gave me a major ick for some reason. but then i got into this guys stuff and saw it again and thought id give it a go and now its like an extra limb. fuck my 3rd bullet point, this is my gender identity. i could not articulate in words what it is about the mortician that i love so much, but i really really do. i am certifiably obsessed. cant believe i made it through this whole thing without mentioning alex. but there you are. yay this was fun :D
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maythedreadwolftakeyou · 4 months ago
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sorry to message but i just wanted to yell because I saw a post and yOU’RE THE AUTHOR OF FALLOUT FROM THE FADE ???? oh my goodness it’s my favourite fic ive read it SO many times.
i left a comment on ao3 last night because i finished reading it again and i just genuinely hope one day you finish it (i understand you have much going on i am just greedy).
but yes thank you so much for creating it, fenris and hawke are everything to me and this fic is my canon no matter what happens in veilguard. 💜
hahaha HELLO yes that is indeed I... I guess i do owe a little bit of an explanation here since its been uh... like 4 years since I last updated, yeah :| But it still makes me so happy that even after so long people still enjoy my little pile of suffering and yearning!
I don't know how many people who used to follow it are still on tumblr (I think a lot of people i used to write with/who would comment have deleted their tumblrs and AO3 accounts in the intervening years alas) but i do I owe anyone remaining a little context I guess lol. Long story made short is like very shortly after my last update i got broken up with unexpectedly from my 4 year relationship, and went into a bit of a spiral about it. I didn't fully stop writing at this point (though I think nothing I wrote in that like... year or more ended up posted anywhere), but I did realize that when I went to work on my ongoing stuff I was in a place where I was like... only wanting to write about anger/losing relationships rather than healing ones. And that part of me wanted to change some of the things I had planned for the following parts and ending of Fallout From the Fade. And so I decided to take a step back from it for a while to see if I actually wanted to make those changes when I was less bitter or if I wanted to follow my original plan.
And that took me about a year, emotionally. However by then I had actually left my prior job (where I spent a lot of time hiking/camping in the wilderness of Utah with no internet, and I used that time for writing), and started graduate school courses. Aaaannnd grad school has been slowly eating my life since. I've only posted I think one other fanfic since then, and it was a very short prose-poem one shot. Another contributing factor was my gaming tech was too old to actually play Trespasser when it came out, and by the time I got a laptop that could handle it, I had to replay the whole game but I was working full time, etc... and i felt really disconnected from the DA fandom since I couldn't read all the new fic/understand all the lore deep dive posts/experience it with everyone else simultaneously. Oh yeah and I work a second job as a professional mermaid in varying degrees of intensity depending on the season/oportunties available haha.
All that being said. I actually have written more of FFtF in the last 2 years. But like I said in the other post I made kinda recently, the long gaps between my later updates (vs the ones I was doing way more regularly in 2016-2018) had me rethink the approach I was using to write and post it, which was a chapter at a time. It felt like stringing people along in kind of a mean way to dump a chapter and then vanish for another year, and I knew I couldn't promise consistency while doing a masters/PhD program. So I've been kind of fiddling away at it slowly still, both actual writing of following chapters, and some substantial firming up/drafting sections in my outline to get to the eventual ending and ensure it's more cohesive than a lot of my slapdash chapters. But! Idk! I do also def work slower without the fun of having an audience, and miss that. and I never actually asked of the people who are left and still wanna read more of it, if they'd rather just get a chapter every 6 months or so as I scrounge it out. If you are one of those people and have an opinion def let me know.
I will say, the imminent presence of Veilguard does have me more inspired and creative again, and some of that has been going to Fallout. Especially since I'm no longer watching the videos/gameplay bioware is putting out since they have SOOO many spoilers and I wanna go into the game at least semi blind, so my creative energy has to go towards my personal stuff rather than joining everyone else in speculation and hype now. I'm definitely not promising I will have it close to finished by October when Veilguard releases, because I'm still in grad school and the next months are busy for me in terms of mermaid work too, but I am hoping I can make some good chunks of progress between now and then. But then if I say that and can't follow through after all I also don't wanna let people down.
Anyway yeah, it's sort of a lot of conflicting thoughts. But I'm still rotating Hawke and Fenris and this fic in my mind even these years later... which for me is honestly pretty normal. I mean I have whole original novels/worldbuilding ideas/etc that I've worked on for 10-15 years in my own time haha, I've been writing fiction for fun since I was like 10, so I think I also just think of stories/writing across a bigger timeline than people who start writing with fanfiction (which is MUCH faster paced) than original fiction. The difference of course is no one sees my original stuff so there's no one to care if i take 2 years between chunks of progress. SO I guess what I am trying to say is, yes definitely it is not abandoned, I am plodding away at it bit by bit, I also hope I can finish it one day!!!! that is within this decade i hope! whether or not anyone else is left to read it but me haha
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pastelprince18 · 1 year ago
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✨🌸INTRO🌸✨
✨Hello their my beloved little fellas, Names Ray [Nicknamed not real name]! I usually post my art weather being doodles, wips, sketches, paintings or finished pieces being fandom stuff or my own  projects [which is rare because I am so shy to share my very own content and don't know how people will act, maybe someday I will talk about it] I would appreciate if you do see my art anywhere to DM me and NOT harass anybody <:] , but if you do share my work PLEASE CREDIT ME!!I IT WILL ME A LOT TO ME /Gen✨
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✨ Short Info✨
💖Ray [Perfered] , Raylin, Pastel
💖Adult
💖 Puerto Rican
💖 Demi Girl [She/They/Her/Them]
💖Lesbian, Ace
💖Taken 
💖#Kbyeart is my arttag 
💖Self-Taught Artist 
💖Can Be a bit too talktive </3
💖Gamer [if you like to add me on switch lmk CLOSE FRIENDS ONLY!!
💖COMMISSION CHART HERE If intrested please dm on my platforms: Instagram, Tumblr, Discord, Deviant Art, and Twitter all under the same name :]
💖Can get anxious meeting new people either too shy or too excited 
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⭐️Interests⭐️
🌸Mario Rabbids Series 
🌸Rabbids Invasion
🌸Cuphead
🌸Sanrio
🌸Spongebob 
🌸Mario.Bros 
🌸 Pastel, Hospital, Nostalgic Core Aesthetic 
🌸Carebears 
🌸Regular Show [Been a while but I still love it <33]
🌸Plushies 
🌸Pretty Blood 
🌸The Bad Guys 
🌸Happy Tree Friends 
🌸Rayman
🌸BFB
🌸Inanimate Insanity
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⛈DNI⛈
Proshipper
Basic Racism,Bigots,Homophobics, Transphobic 
Art Thief
Discourse Accounts 
NFT’s Cryptic 
DDLGS 
Cringe Culture [Ya know the people who say “THATS CRINGE EW”]
You harass me or any of my friends/ mutuals. That is automatic block
Also Spamming inbox + Dms will be blocked 
Dream SMP Fans 
Fetish Artist 
Vizpop Fans
HH and HB stuff, I don’t wanna hear nothing of that shit, please block me or i’ll block you I don’t nothing to do with it or see it on my damn feed /srs
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🍒BYF🍒
As stated before I do talk a lot, I usually ramble about my own HC, Oc Stuff, Ships, Ideas or even things I really enjoy from games, shows movies ect. I hope you are prepared on what I will share here. And just know it is for fun and I would love for ya’ll to also share your ideas <3 
I tend to have depressed episodes sometimes, if you do see me writing things on here mainly at night, its where I can show during that time since I feel bad for venting too much to friends. I feel bad even venting out just to let steam off, sorry for advance :’]
I open request when I feel like it weather being I am art blocked, have no ideas or no motvation. IT IS A RARE MOMENT, PLEASE DO NOT SPAM MY INBOX!!! IF I HAVE NOT DONE UR REQUEST I WILL GLADLY DO IT WHEN I AM FREE 
 Speaking of the first one. Do not spam inbox please, I have gotten that lately and I tend to get anxious or annoyed since I can't always answer stuff, I do have a job and I tend to get sidetrack, even if I am not in the best mental state please do not be on top of me, I do not like that.
My art takes quite a bit to post weather being a painting or digital art, I work 5 days a week and usually it drains me where I am at. usually cause of that my motivation drains fast. I know I say I promise to do things and I will keep that promise, even if its months too late I'll try to work on it <3
Don’t call my art hot or sexy if I don’t know you at all and especially if you’re a minor- I don’t like when people in general call my art hot or sexy [Unless you’re my close friend than idm <3]
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Thank you all for dropping by and hope to get to know most of you all :’]
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omentranslates · 2 years ago
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Villain - chapter 1 english fan translation
Hello, I've translated chapter 1 of the new manga for Teniwoha's song, Villain. This is just a text translation, but the chapter is free to read in its entirety here. Also a warning just in case: this manga may be uncomfortable to read due to how the trans themes are written. I may speak a bit more about this later in another post, but for now I would just like to discourage harsh judgements based just on this chapter. Thank you for reading.
Btw the characters names are Orio Azuru (blue hair) and Midou Renri (blonde hair)
"'I'm sure we'll freak them out just by holding hands.' A boy who doesn't understand his own gender identity, Orio Azuru has fallen in love with the freeest "man" in town, Midou Renri, at least that's how it should've been." -- site description
Orio *narrating*: I'm going to meet him again today. There were no promises made, there's every chance he won't still be there. But still...
A sign that says NO TRESPASSING
Orio: Renri
Orio: Renri....Reeeenri, I'm here.
Orio: OOF *gets the shit smacked out of them*
Renri: Don't 'I'm here' me, asshole. I already told you not to come around here anymore, are you stupid or something? Orio Azuru?
Orio: Wow, you're in a bad mood today! Something happen?
Renri: Do I have to beat it into you again til you remember?
Orio: Oh yeah, I brought you Big Burger as a present!
Orio: Even with you being you, this abandoned building isn't really where you live, right? Haven't you just taken it for yourself since the utilities still work sometimes?
Renri: I FOUND THIS PLACE SO IT'S MINE TIL THEY STOP.
Orio: Well that's why I thought I'd bring you a little something!
Renri: I already told you I don't need shit like this, if you're trying to farm gratitude you're out of luck.
Orio: Aren't you eating right up, though....?
Renri: What the hell is your goal here?
Orio: Goal? No, it's nothing like that.
Orio: Y'know how when you wanna talk with your friends so you walk across the classroom to see them? It's the same thing.
Renri: ....seriously? Look, I dunno much about school but it seems like you just have way too much time on your hands.
Both: Oh
Renri: ROCK PAPER SCISSORS GO- ACK
Orio: Nice try!
Orio: Anyways, yeah. Hanging out with you is fun. Is that so wrong?
Renri: OF COURSE IT IS, UNLIKE YOU I DON'T HAVE ALL THE TIME IN THE WORLD FOR THIS.
Orio: Oh, that so!? Even though you're always asleep on that sofa no matter when I show up?
Renri: I WILL FUCKING KILL YOU.
Orio *narrating*: I like him.
Orio *narrating*: That day, I didn't feel like going straight home. But I didn't have anywhere else I'd rather be either. So I ended up turning some unfamiliar corners in my search for a place I could be alone.
Orio *narrating*: It didn't hit me right away what that colorful substance on the ground was. I was totally alone, there wouldn't be help coming. There could be demons or maybe even snakes back there. But I just wanted a distraction, so I figured anything would do.
Orio *narrating*: Those were my thoughts when I opened the door to see a beast most horrible, most fearsome and beautiful.
Orio *narrating*: I'm glad I came here (You shouldn't have come here)
Renri: ----Hellooo? Orio Azuru?
Renri: If you're just gonna sit there and space out then go home already. I wanna take a shower.
Orio: Sorry, sorry! Then how about I tell you about something interesting that happened at school today!
Renri: No I wanted you to leave.
Orio: Ah come on, you don't have to pay attention, think of it like listening to the radio.
Orio *narrating*: He kicked me in the head the moment we met, but it doesn't seem like he actually hates talking to me. He's actually got a much more calm personality than you'd expect, and the more I've bothered him, I've been able to get to know him, little by little.
Orio *narrating*: Like how he's a dropout with no parents, how he's got relatives he doesn't want to go home to so he's repurposed this abandoned apartment, how he made a lot of enemies teasing the local delinquent groups.
Orio *narrating*: How he was injured when we met, and how he got whoever did it back three times over later.
Orio *narrating*: He'd be so cool if he could just be quiet, but he ruins it with that violent and immature nature of his. Even so...
Renri: So, that injury. You get it in a fight?
Orio: No way.
Renri: Ah, ok.
Orio *narrating*: He's also way sharper than you'd expect. He always seems to know what lines not to cross to keep things comfortable. Well...maybe he just doesn't care that much, but-
Orio: If you're done, I'll collect the trash.
Renri: Hey wait, I'm not done yet.
*the flashback starts here*
Classmate: You're kinda weird, huh.
Classmate: If you're joking, it's not funny. So knock it off.
Classmate: What are you even saying, people are gonna think you're gross.
Orio: Sorry, I was joking.
Orio: I'll turn my everything into a joke. So please don't make me out to be the villain.
Orio: What exactly....am I?
*the flashback ends here*
Orio: Ah....
Orio: ....sorry. My hand slipp-
Renri: You didn't get a concussion when you got hit, right? It'd be trouble if you collapsed on the way home.
Orio: Huh, what? Why are you scarier when you're trying to be nice to me!?
Renri: HUH??
Orio: Just kidding!
Orio: ....just kidding.
Orio *narrating*: 'Go home for today,' he said. Makes it sound like there’ll be a tomorrow.
Orio *narrating*: There were no promises made, there's every chance I'll open that door and he'll be gone. When that happens, I guess I'll stop coming here.
Orio *narrating*: Even though thinking that always makes me scared to open the door, for some reason, you're always there.
Orio *narrating*: I do understand. That I can't ask for more than right now. But still, I'll definitely go see him tomorrow too.
Orio *narrating*: I love him. And I'm ok with just that.
Orio: I stayed for a long time today, what time is it? Huh? No way, I left my phone?
Orio: Renri's in the shower? I guess there's no need to knock since we're both guys so.....
Orio *narrating*: I love him. But there was never a "him."
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youngpettyqueen · 2 years ago
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Hiya! If you're still doing that WIP ask game, could I please request "rumor has it" and "for the man who gives everything"? Thank you! ^_^
P.S. I LOVE your idea for a fic about Hawkeye and the still in PoA omg!!!
yo!! im totally still doing the WIP ask game its so much fun and I love any excuse to ramble about my writing- thanks so much for asking!
"rumour has it"
it's this post. ive been working on this one on and half ever since I made that post, actually. its been slowgoing due to a) and miles to go before i sleep b) writer's block and c) I keep making new WIPs because I have absolutely no self control whatsoever and if I dont write down every idea I have im gonna die
anyways onto writings cause I have quite a bit for this-
"“Mornin’, sir,” Radar greets, all pleasantries, though he’s wearing an additional anxious look over his usual nervous one, “I was wonderin’ if you maybe had a minute?” 
BJ offers him a warm smile. “For you, Radar, I’ve got at least two,” He tells him, “What can I do for you?” 
Radar manages a little smile of his own. “Oh, well, thanks,” He says, “It’s about a patient, actually. I’ve got one who could use your help. Think you got enough minutes for that?” He asks. 
BJ chuckles. Radar’s tone isn’t urgent, so it’s probably not anything serious. Probably one of his animals with another splinter, or a runny nose. “Sure, Radar,” He agrees, “Bring ‘em on in. Is it one of your pets again? I warn you, if I have to surprise-deliver another litter of guinea piglets, I’m gonna have to charge you.” He jokes. 
Radar’s expression goes nervous again. His eyes flick to outside the door- he still hasn’t stepped fully into post-OP, just sort of hovering half-inside. “Uh, not exactly,” He replies, “Y’see, it’s-“
“Not exactly?” BJ would recognize that offended tone anywhere. Sure enough, Hawkeye shoves his way inside not a second later, nearly bowling Radar right over seeing as he’s got his arm around the kid’s shoulders to lean on, “What’s that supposed to mean, not exactly? Just which one of your animals are you comparing me to?” He demands."
this one is all silliness! thats it thats all just a lot of silliness. Hawkeye's hurt (not seriously) and he won't tell anyone what happened, and BJ's determined to get to the bottom of it. the 4077 rumour mill does nothing but make his mission more difficult, as rumours escalate to ridiculous levels. which uh, all becomes really funny when you find out what happened. which is in the post itself
bonus because this bit makes me laugh-
"“Sir- sir, you’re gonna fall-“ Radar is saying, managing the impressive feat of staying upright as he keeps up with Hawkeye hounding in on him.
“Oh, no! No, no, no!” Hawkeye continues, undeterred, hobbling after Radar like he’s chasing him, “You opened this can of worms! Which of your animals are you comparing me to? It better not be-“"
because I love some Hawkeye and Radar clownery <3
"for the man who gives everything"
I do not have anything written down for this one besides plot notes to myself, but I do have the blurb!
"All the ways Klinger shows how much he loves everyone, and what they do to show him how much they love him.
Or, 6 times Klinger did something just to make someone else smile, and 1 time everyone got together to return the favour."
classic 5(ish) + 1, centring on Klinger because I love him. I recently got to Where There's a Will, There's a War in my rewatch and Hawkeye thinking of when Klinger got him the magazine made me wanna cry, and I realized I havent really written anything about Klinger despite how much I love him! so, the idea for this came to mind
this will be a longer oneshot (like rumour has it) where Klinger goes out of his way to do something nice for another main cast member, all from the POV of others, and then it will be how everybody repays him from his POV. because Klinger deserves the world and im gonna give it to him
again, thanks so much for the ask!
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noes-pillow · 2 years ago
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Well... would ya LOOK at that...
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I’m gonna be real I don’t have any event planned for 100 followers lol, sorry y’all. I feel like its been no time since 50 I swear.
But I do have this... (edit: this is long, didn’t mean it to be, I don’t even know where I was going with this when I wrote it, lets call it a brain dump)
Life has a funny way of doing things when it comes to how I apply my emotions to my writing...
Even though its 90% done, there's a portion of a scene in A Memory is Not Enough that I've been putting off. For many different reasons.
It's gonna be very rhetorically challenging.
It's gonna be very emotionally challenging.
...and also I just finished reading a really long book (tgcf) so I'm just chasing the dopamine and I didn't wanna write 🤷‍♀️
But suddenly last night I had a dream about suddenly seeing my dad again.
It's been 6 months since he passed.
In the dream I was screaming and crying telling him to help me make sure I wasn't dreaming. To do anything. Hit me, kick me, push me to the ground. None of this is something my dad would ever do, but I wanted to feel pain because in my eyes the pain would make me wake up if I was indeed dreaming.
Last night I learned pain doesn't make you wake up from a dream.
...or at least perceived pain in your dream doesn't.
Because at one point I had been kicked to the ground and I thought I had proven whatever I was in was not a dream. My life had been lying to me. My dad was alive and I had confirmed it wasn’t a dream... or thought I did.
Except when I looked up I saw my mom as well and something clicked. This February mom will have been dead for 3 years. So that’s when I woke up.
...
Something you've lost in your life will always make its way into your dreams if you miss it enough. And there's no sure way to test if you're dreaming or not...
...except when you naturally wake up.
"Alex, what in the hell does this have to do with your writing?"
Well... I think I just found out how I'm gonna write that once scene I’ve been putting off.
And I'm sorry in advance, but I think grief is such a powerful emotion. Its the only emotion I have never been able to control or fully mask. I can only funnel it into my writing.
And I like to watch my readers SQIRM 
I like to see you all comment and tell me you cried or screamed or wished for a different ending or really ANY comment at all.
I feel like I can show a bit of what I'm feeling using the characters that we all love. Because when someone loses someone there’s no such thing as true empathy. No one will ever really KNOW how I feel.
But if I kill a character we love using what grief I have, a lot of us will feel the same... or at least similar.
And since I can't FORCE anyone to read my stories, I feel like the people that do make me feel... heard. And in turn I like hearing from YOU ALL. Which sounds cheesy as fuck but I don't have a better word for it.
So... as I didn’t intend to write this massive text post, all I gotta say is... 
Thank You.
Thank you for liking, reblogging, commenting, or reading my stories.
Thank you for sending me prompts.
Thank you for loving VNC with me in general. The ride would not be anywhere near as fun without having this blog.
I know followers don’t matter, I don’t really care about this number at all tbh. It’s just an excuse for me to thank the little corner of the internet which I have made this blog to be.
It’s nothing really in the grand scheme, but to me it is still... something.
Thanks guys. I’ll be around 💜💙
With love,
Alex
fin
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love-bokumono-fics · 1 year ago
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How do you deal with indecision for a fic? Just weigh the pros and cons of the paths you could take? Or just write for whichever path youre motivated for at the time? It sucks getting stuck on something like that!!
Hi Nonny,
Indecision is tough to deal with! getting stuck anywhere on a story sucks, but in particular when you have ideas but you just don't know which one to take. Fortunately (or maybe unfortunately if you're paralyzed by indecision) there are a number of ways to get past it.
I'm personally an "as the mood strikes" kind of writer, so I'll almost always take the idea path that seems more interesting or motivates me most. Or the one that seems most fun. Since I tend to write the stories I wanna read, I follow the ideas I find more fun.
But that being said, there's nothing wrong with taking a few steps back and looking at the story as a whole. Is there a decision that makes more sense based on the preceding events? Is one option more in character? Do you want this to be an in character moment? How will the different options cascade down through the rest of the story? Do you know where you want the story to end? Will one choice get you there in a more satisfying way?
But also, also. Do you really have to choose? If this is a fun project, and you're not writing on a deadline, there's nothing stopping you from exploring all of your choices. Write a little bit of each, see which one you feel more drawn to or which one ends up fitting better in the story. Or write all of them, and the one that doesn't make it into the story save for inspiration for a later story, or post is separate as a "Bonus Scene" or something. There's no rules about writing AUs of your own stories!
And if you're feeling equally motivated by the ideas that have caused your indecision, and you just CANNOT choose between one, flip a coin, or let a picker wheel choose for you. At the very least, it will give you a starting point to jump off from. Sometimes, though, when random chance gives you its answer you realize "nope, don't wanna do that one" and again, you have a starting point.
I hope this has been somewhat helpful, Nonny. And I'm sure there's others who follow this blog who had all kinds of tips and tricks that work for them. Hopefully you'll find something that works best for you. Creativity is a fickle beast, and what works best for you might not be what works best for others.
I wish you all the best of luck in your creative endeavors!
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clownkiwi · 6 years ago
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ok so idk if this really needs to be said but. please treat everyone with basic human decency and respect. its the easiest thing to do. even if you’re just “memeing”, what you’re doing will actually do more harm for them in the future. so, from now on, reach out, talk to them, respect and love them
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rebuke-me · 2 years ago
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its another playlist post, this time: jeremy heere playlist and the lines that made me put the song on there
loser boy - joseph dubay
hold your breath, little loser boy // one day you will find your therapist
weightless - all time low
but i’m stuck in this fucking rut // waiting on a secondhand pick-me-up // and i’m over getting older
warm regards - penelope scott
it doesn’t fucking matter if i don’t wanna go // to college or to heaven or to anywhere alone // nothing really matters from my point of view
brand new city - mitski
i think my life is losing momentum // i think my ways are wearing me down
better than me - the brobecks
every girl from here to soho // loves to tell me things i don’t know // beautiful and smart and not good for me // at all
sophie - the altogether
sophie, your friends all think i’m lonely // but they don’t really know me // i guess i’ll have to work on that
good morning sunshine - the narcissist cookbook
you can’t stay in bed forever, remember the deal // bed is for sleeping and masturbating // and you’ve had about as much as the human body can take of either of those things
it will be chloe - a. j. holmes [ not about chloe valentine LMAO ]
if i ever kiss a girl, it will be chloe // if i ever hug a girl, it will be chloe // if ever in my life i get to taste the romance // of a dance with my hands placed gently around someone’s waist // it will be chloe!
player 2 - rory webley
save yourself // as long as you’re the one having fun // must be nice being player one // must be nice being player one // i’m so done with you // and being your stupid player two
montreal - penelope scott
and then on top of all the everything, assuming i survive // another 90 day summer’s gonna take my fucking life // and i would rather die
lonely dance - set it off
but i’m okay with missing // out on the social anxiety // out on the phony friends i don’t need
happy pills - weathers
but where i leave the lights on // it’s obvious that my life’s pretty plain // i take my pills and i’m happy all the time
twin size mattress - the front bottoms
it’s no big surprise you turned out this way // when they close their eyes and prayed you would change
deadweight - fernway
i took a shot of self-esteem in small doses // let it go straight to my head // and i’ve been making bad choices // that you’ll never understand
what do you want from me tonight? - sidney gish
now i’m stuck losing my mind // while everyone else just thinks that i’m really shy
how i survived bobby mackey’s personal hell - lincoln
you left some holes in the plotline // i left some holes in your clothes // and we can argue semantics over who left who first // but one thing’s for sure, i needed you most
solitary confinement - everybody’s worried about owen
you cannot isolate me past the walls that i have built // so send your condolence cards // thinking i’ve been held against my will
be nice to me - the front bottoms
there is very little left of me // and it’s never coming back // there are certain things you ask of me // and there are certain things i lack
sweet hibiscus tea - penelope scott
and i am not your protagonist // i’m not even my own // i don’t know anything // i don’t even know what i don’t know
saturn suv - fredo disco
and i’m always tired, but i can’t fall asleep // thinking about the things i wanna be but i will never be
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mickey-henry · 4 years ago
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𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐛𝐮𝐜𝐤𝐲
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pairing: bucky barnes x reader
summary: bucky’s been flirting with you, but hasn’t taken it further than that. frustrated, you decide to take matters into your own hands.
word count: 2.1k
warnings: occasional swearing (but not much) and frustrating flirting (I’d be melting if it was happening to me). besides that, this fic is pure fluffy fun.
author’s note: hello there! this is my second fic; I’m very excited to post it! I found the header image here, and if you want to listen to the song I reference in this fic, you can listen here. bold text indicates singing, while italicized text refers to inner thoughts. likes, reblogs, messages, replies, and comments are cherished! I hope you like it! 💖
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Bucky Barnes is an acquaintance at best. The two of you rarely work together, and with conflicting schedules, you see little of each other around the compound. On a random Friday in April, however, something changes in you. The moment is nothing out of the ordinary. You’re sitting on the couch in the main living space, re-reading one of your favorite books. Bucky has just returned from a mission; you glance up to see his exhausted expression. He catches your eye, winking with a smile, before walking to his room. Your heart flutters and your head freezes at the response. “Oh, no,” you think to yourself. “Maybe that was a one-time thing? I don’t actually like him, right?” Wrong. 
Ever since that night, the mere presence of Bucky Barnes drives you crazy: his stunning blue eyes that squint ever so slightly when he smiles, his adorable nose that crinkles when he laughs, his pillowy lips that you lose yourself in, his  fluffy hair you can’t help but imagine running your fingers through, his scruff speckled jawline that you wish would brush along your hands, cheeks, anywhere really. He occupies your dreams; you can’t escape this man even if you try. Today, he drives you crazier than usual. He stands in the compound's kitchen in a tight black t-shirt, one that leaves nothing to the imagination. This is the first time you’ve seen him in short sleeves, in anything other than tactical gear. You can’t help but stare as he prepares his lunch. The shirt hugs his frame tight, accentuating his biceps that had no right to be that big. “Gosh, he must spend hours in the gym to look like that.” You then notice the vein in his right arm protruding from his skin, tracing it with your eyes. You didn’t think he could become any more beautiful, but here he is before you, incredible as ever. 
You’re pulled from your reverie when Bucky calls your name. “Yeah?” you reply, barely masking the startled stutter in your voice.
“Pass me the salt?”
“Oh! Sure, of course,” you muster, taking a sip of water from the glass in front of you as you hand him the salt shaker. 
“Thanks, doll,” he flirts with a smile, the same one he gave you that night when he got back to the compound. You nearly choke. “Bucky Barnes called me a term of endearment?!? Holy shit.” Your heart swells and you look down at your glass in a desperate attempt to hide the blush creeping its way across your cheeks. “Goodness gracious, I respond this way from a simple word?” You couldn’t imagine how you’d feel if he touched you. 
It didn’t take long to find out. The following day, you stand in the kitchen prepping your lunch, singing softly along to the song playing from your phone. Bucky appears soon after. He stands close to you for a moment, closer than necessary, but of course you don’t mind. He has just showered; his cologne lingers in the air, intoxicating you. Somehow, you keep singing along, showing no sign that your mind is elsewhere. 
“Ugh, he smells amazing. This man has too much power over me; this is ridiculous! I don’t even remember what I was doing—”
“You have a beautiful voice,” he compliments.
“Thank you, Bucky,” you softly reply, your heart racing at his praise.
“Let me get by you real fast, doll,” he says, moving to walk behind you. 
“There he goes again with the pet name. My god, could this get any worse—” 
He places his hands gently on your hips as he moves beside you. Electricity travels through your whole body; you’re internally screaming at his touch. His hands feel better than you imagined. Even though the contact lasts only a moment, the effects of his touch linger after, leaving you speechless. 
You hear a musical chuckle from the man behind you. “Is he teasing me? It sure feels like it,” you wonder. There is no way that he can’t see the effect he has on you. Before you can even formulate another thought, he touches you again as he moves back to the other side of you. “That was definitely on purpose; certainly he wouldn’t do this by accident. Right?”
Your eyes linger as he finishes putting together his lunch. He catches your gaze and smiles. “See you later, sweetheart,” he says with a wink before leaving the room. “Okay, that answers my question; that was very intentional. What am I going to do with myself?”
You don’t know how much longer you can take his teasing. Throughout the week, he ups his antics, calling you pet names more than your own, stealing touches whenever he can get away with it, smiling whenever you make eye contact. The tension is insatiable; thoughts of Bucky follow you everywhere. You decide to take matters in your own hands; Bucky did not seem to be planning to make a move anytime soon. If he is going to tease the hell out of you, you might as well get some payback. 
───────────── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ・ ─────────────
Tony’s announcement of Friday night karaoke gives you a wicked idea. However, for it to work, you need to recruit help. You know just who to ask. It doesn’t take long to find Sam and Steve; they spent a ton of their free time sparring in the gym. They seem to be at the end of their workout, their movements slow and sloppy, relying on witty retorts to throw off the other. They stop when they notice your arrival. 
“Hey!” Sam says with a smile, hugging you as you approach. You squeeze him tightly, even with his sticky sweat coating his arms. You greet Steve with a hug too.
“What brings you to our neck of the woods?” Steve asks as you let go.
“Can I ask you guys something? And you promise you two won’t laugh at me? Especially if I'm reading this wrong?”
“Of course,” answers Steve. 
“Yeah, for sure,” replies Sam. 
You hesitate for a second, taking a deep breath. “Does Bucky like me? I swear he does. He keeps teasing me, and I don’t know how much longer I can take it. I think I am practically in love with the guy at this point, he’s so beautiful and—”
You stop as the boys exchange glances and begin laughing. 
You cross your arms, hurt. “You said you wouldn’t laugh at me! I can’t control how I feel.”
“No! Wait! We aren’t laughing at you!” Steve says between giggles. 
You furrow your brows. “Then why are you laughing?”
“Bucky’s obsessed with you,” Steve answers after calming his laughter. 
“God, yes, you’re all he talks about nowadays,” Sam adds. 
“What?! He does? Why? Are you shitting me right now? Because that would be really freaking mean—“
“No! Of course not,” Steve insists. “Don’t you see the way he looks at you?”
“And the pet names he gives you?” Sam adds.
“And how he can’t seem to keep his hands to himself lately?” Steve finishes. 
Now you feel stupid for even asking. Of course you noticed all of those things. They were all you ever thought about. “Well, yeah, but maybe he does that with all the girls.”
“What girls?” Sam retorted. “The only women who are here often enough to cross paths with him are you, Natasha, and Wanda. Wanda’s with Vision, as weird as that is, but love is love. Natasha shoots daggers at anyone who looks at her with love in their eyes. That leaves you.”
“Why in the world would he like me? Of all people? He’s out of my league,” you sigh,
Sam’s scoff pulls you from your thoughts. “Bucky? Out of your league? He’s a crazy ex-assassin with emotional issues! If anything, he's out of your league.”
“You’re a catch, why wouldn’t he like you?” Steve assures.
Steve and Sam always know just what to say to make you feel better. “I guess you’re right,” you admit with a defeated grin. 
“So, you know how Bucky feels. What are you going to do about it?” Steve asks. 
“I have an idea, but I need your help.”
“We’re listening.”
You divulge your plan to them. They smile, hyping you up. 
“Dude, I’m so down!” Sam exclaims, clapping his hands in excitement. 
“You think this will work?”
“Definitely,” Steve assures. “This is going to be amazing!”
“Okay then, we’re doing this. Let’s go find Bucky. Time to initiate phase one.”
───────────── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ・ ─────────────
Bucky is sitting on the common room couch, flipping through a book when he sees you, Sam, and Steve enter. He exchanges a glance with you, smiling as your eyes light up. The three of you sit down. You’re sitting next to Sam, closer than usual. There’s a brief moment of silence before you speak. “Sam, are you going to karaoke night?”
“Of course! Wouldn’t miss everyone’s drunk-ass singing for the world.”
“Will you be my duet partner?”
This catches Bucky’s attention. He looks up from his book. Why the hell were you asking Sam to sing with you? You normally ask the girls...
“Sure thing, baby. It’ll be a ton of fun!” Sam smiles. 
Baby?! What?! How dare he call you a pet name, his girl, right in front of him? Well, you may not be his girl yet, but Sam knows how he feels about you. What the hell is he thinking?
“Yay! This’ll be so fun!” You hug him, grabbing his hand before continuing, “Wanna practice with me in a bit?”
“Find me when you’re ready, sweetheart,” Sam answers, kissing your knuckle before letting go of your hand. 
Sweetheart?! What the fuck was going on? Did he miss his shot? Would Sam really do that to him? Bucky can barely handle his swirling thoughts. He storms out of the room without looking back. 
Steve can’t help but laugh once Bucky is out of earshot. “That worked a little too well, wouldn’t you say so?”
“That wasn’t too far, was it?” you ask with a worried expression on your face. 
“Nah, don’t worry about it. He’ll just come on even stronger now. He won’t give up on you that easily,” Sam assures you. 
───────────── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ・ ─────────────
Bucky can barely contain his anger as you step on the stage with Sam, giggling and smiling at your karaoke partner. Jealousy engulfs him. He can barely listen to the start of the song, ignoring the catchy beat blasting through the speakers. He doesn’t recognize the song, but looks up from his drink when you sing, “Hey Bucky boy, what you doing tonight? I wanna see what you got in store."
He looks right at you. Did she just say Bucky?
Sam echoes, “Hey, hey Bucky!” Well, that answers his question.
“You're giving it your all when you're dancing on me. I want to see if you can give me some more,” you continue, twirling your fingers through your hair.
“Hey, hey Bucky!”
“You can be my man, I can be your girl, and we can pump this jam however you want,” you sing, swaying your hips to the cadence of the lyrics.
“Hey, hey Bucky!”
“Pump it from the side, pump it upside down, or we can pump it from the back and the front,” you wink as you finish the line. Bucky sits up suddenly, crossing his legs, his face turning beet red. You smile, knowing the plan was working. Steve laughs from beside him. He keeps his eyes glued on you as the two of you continue the song, utterly entranced. You look him right in the eye as you end the song, “I want you tonight.”
You saunter over to where he is sitting after high-fiving Sam, confidence filling your chest. “So, what did you think of my performance, Bucky?”
You yelp as he grabs your hips and pulls you down to sit on his lap. His voice deepens, “you’re such a tease, you know that right?”
You laugh. “I’m the tease? Really? You’re the one who just pulled me onto your lap and taunts me with flirtatious remarks and smiles all freaking day. My god Bucky, make a move already—”
He cuts you off, pulling you in for a kiss, his flesh arm grabbing the back of your neck. The team whoops and cheers. 
“Glad you finally made a move, Bucky,” you pant as your lips part from his.
“Best decision I ever made in my life, doll.” Before you can respond, he kisses you again, the karaoke bar fading in the background as you finally embrace the man of your dreams.
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lightsovermonaco · 3 years ago
Text
Body Shots (Pierre Gasly)
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Inspired by (and beta read) by the amazing @limp-wrist-max​ thank you Mea! 
Masterlist
Word count: 3.5k
Recommended song: “Lucky You” by Sim Dane
Vacationing in Milan had its perks. Fine dining, luxury stores that were prime for window shopping, and the proximity to your best friend, to name a few.
When you'd touched down in Milan you had had no intentions of visiting Pierre. You had just finished your exams for your summer class and had a week before the next semester started up, so you had simply booked the cheapest ticket and boarded a plane. 
The intent had been to have some good wine, good food and unwind. Pierre saw your Instagram story minutes after you posted it and recognized the bakery you stopped at for lunch. And once he found out you were only a few minutes away from that weekend's grand prix, he had ideas that didn't involve you reading a novel all day.
Pierre had insisted that a last minute cancelation by a family friend had left a paddock pass unclaimed and had suggested you take it.
"You're my best friend, it'll be fun to have you experience a weekend through my eyes for once instead of sitting in the stands. Come visit me."
Something in the inflection of his voice made the simple request rub you raw. He missed you. It had been months since your last get together and you couldn't blame him. The last year had been rough for him and he  rarely had anyone physically at his side to help him through it.
Inviting you instead of one of his parents was about more than your current proximity to the track. He hadn't missed a beat in asking you, not hesitating to consider anyone else being with him this weekend.
Your stomach had turned as you climbed in a cab Sunday morning, not out of fear of something going wrong but because of the nagging feeling that something was about to change.
You'd known Pierre since you were kids. Your brother had raced in karting before pursuing another dream, but in the few short years you'd hung around European tracks you had managed to forge a bond with one of your brother's rivals. That friendship carried on regardless of the distance that separated you, kept alive by visits in the off season and once a year trips to the racetrack at Silverstone.
Pierre met you at the gates and you had barely seen him since.
A decent qualifying session saw the Frenchman start P10 on Sunday's race. He didn't hide the fact that he was disappointed, but come time for his final meeting with the team you'd never guess he was anything but ecstatic.
You had to be conscious about your mouth hanging open when Pierre stepped into the garage in his fireproofs with his suit half undone. The tuft of blond hair peeking through his backwards cap floats on an invisible breeze and he bounces on his toes. His brow furrows when he is handed a data sheet, listening intently to what the engineer points out.
Butterflies riot in your stomach when Pierre catches you staring and winks. You pray he writes the blush on your cheeks off as the heat and he must, because he raises his eyebrows and flexes a bit.
You laugh to cover the way you want to do nothing but strip him out of that tight fitted white shirt. Your crush was getting out of hand. Pierre's shameless, friendly flirting only escalated matters.
You told yourself it was nothing. He was like this with every girl he met, making a fool of himself to earn a laugh. You were no different, except maybe that you were a constant where most other women only got to enjoy his playful personality for a short time.
You're treated to a few long minutes of watching Pierre prep to climb into the car before he's heading out on track to line up at the grid. 
The race starts off fine, Pierre's pace is better than expected. One of the Haas's breaks down at the pit entry and Pierre's strategist decides to bring him in for a fresh set of tires. A kiss seems like the proper reward for their stroke of brilliance, which affords Pierre the advantage when the pits close soon after. 
Restarting on lap 28 is nail biting. Hamilton, Stroll, and Pierre make up the podium places. The entire garage gasps when Stroll goes wide at turn four. Hamilton serves his penalty and Pierre inherits the lead. Sainz jumps on the opportunity to attack.
Pierre defends brilliantly until the final lap. The team erupts when he crosses the line first, bringing home the win.
Red, white and green confetti sticks to his skin as he sprays the champagne over all of you. In the heat of it all, Pierre sits on that top step and shakes his head. You already know that the photos of him being snapped from all angles will be gorgeous, the sun shining down on the first French grand prix winner in decades.
A legend in the minds of his people and in yours.
You could scarcely believe it yourself. Your best friend had finally, after years of being pushed down, won a grand prix at the temple of speed. Red Bull had been wrong, just as you'd insisted when Pierre cried over losing his seat and his friend in one weekend. But god, did Pierre rise above it all.
Pierre catches your gaze just before he leaves the podium. A lifetime of emotion swirls around him like an enigma, begging you to find out what it was hiding. Your wave is barely more than a lift of your hand but Pierre notes it nonetheless, tipping his trophy in your direction.
You wait patiently on the sidelines as Pierre poses for pictures with his team on and off the track. His attention constantly falls on you, his grin widening each time he sees you tucked under the arm of an enthusiastic mechanic or crew member. Alpha Tauri was a family and you were an honorary member thanks to your connection to their driver.
An action packed hour of cameras passes before Pierre is able to break away. As soon as he's given the go ahead he passes his trophy off and marching to you. You're both practically running by the time you meet in the middle. You crash into him and he lifts you off your feet in a crushing hug.
"You did it," you whisper, overwhelmed by his success now that you've gotten the chance to celebrate with him. "I'm so proud of you."
Pierre laughs as he sets you on your feet. His smile is wider than you've ever seen it and you're sure his cheeks must be sore.
"Wish they allowed us to bring a friend up there," Pierre says softly, a smile melting into a sly smirk. "Seeing you doused in champagne is an image I wouldn't forget."
You shake your head, caught up in his ceaseless flirting. He had no idea that his honeyed words and gentle touches lit something inside of you, rattling your brain and making it impossible to form a coherent sentence. Instead you snatch the black and gold Pirelli cap off his head and place it on your own, earning you a peal of laughter.
"Looks better on you anyway." Pierre runs a hand through his sweaty, champagne doused hair, leaving bits sticking up at odd angles.
Someone calls Pierre's name, far enough away that there's no rush. Pierre's hands remain planted on your waist and yours stay wrapped around his neck. By the way his bright blue eyes bore into yours, you swear he's thinking the same thing you are.
"Thank you for believing in me," he murmurs, gaze falling to your lips.
"I knew it was just a matter of time," you tell him, inching up on your tiptoes. Tempted by his win, you want to ruin the best friendship you've ever had. You want to discover if the lips you spend far too much time dreaming about felt as soft as they looked. You want to know how it feels to be lost in Pierre, newly minted race winner, and find out just how he dealt with the adrenaline and euphoria of his incredible drive.
"Well done mate!"
Max Verstappen startles the two of you apart. You take a healthy step back and drop your gaze to the ground to hide your burning cheeks.
"Thanks." Pierre accepts the Dutchman's embrace and claps him on the back. "Sucks I didn't get to fight you for it."
"There will be more chances in the future. And I didn't expect to see you here, that's a nice surprise." Max knocks you with his shoulder, tipping you off balance. On instinct you latch onto Pierre's arm to steady yourself. You wait a heartbeat too long to remove your hand and both of you find anywhere to look but each other.
"So where's the party?" You ask, searching for a distraction from the way your palm still burns.
"Definitely not at Red Bull." Max shudders and you laugh because that's what you do when someone is being over dramatic. It rings hollow in your ears.
"I hear there's a few guys with adjoining rooms at the hotel who bought plenty of booze," Pierre says. "You and Dan wanna come by?"
"Is that really a question?" Max grins, already typing out a text as Pierre feeds him the details.
**********
"You should do body shots," Max suggests, which earns a roaring laugh from Daniel and a half hearted one from Pierre.
"I don't think so," Pierre says, "there's no one here I trust enough to let that happen."
"Not even your best friend?" Max gestures to you and shoots you a wink when Pierre glances over. "I think she's trustworthy."
"No thanks." Pierre holds up his plastic cup and salutes Max before draining it to the dregs.
Pierre's immediate refusal hurt more than it probably should have. You hadn't expected him to jump at the offer but having him shut the idea down so thoroughly hadn't been what you wanted either.
Max notes your pouty lower lip and speaks on your behalf. "Come on mate," Max insists. "You just won your first prix, live a little! It's not like you've got anything to lose, she's your best friend."
"That's exactly why-"
"Shut up, it would be fun! Wouldn't it?" Max says this last bit to you, a wild grin on his face.
Max expects you to turn red and object. That was his end goal. But what the Dutchman hadn't counted on was how drunk you already were on Pierre. On his smile. On his bright blue eyes, swirling in the aftermath of his unlikely triumph. And mostly on the not-so-sneaky way he glances at you every few minutes.
"Let's do it."
Pierre blinks, searching your face for any sign of distress. "Wait, are you serious?"
"Yeah, why not?" You shrug, suddenly fearing that you'd read him wrong and he really was against this whole thing. "Unless you don't want to-"
"Get the vodka," Pierre interrupts, nodding to Max though his stare remains pinned on you. Pierre latches onto your wrist and drags you around the room until he finds a table long and sturdy enough for his liking. 
"This a good height for you?"
The coffee table is low enough that you'd have to kneel. Luckily getting on your knees isn't something you'd mind doing for Pierre. You lick your lips without thinking. Pierre's pupils blow wide, black swallowing the swirling oceans of blue.
"Sure," is all you manage.
"Good." Apparently neither of you were able to focus on speech. You work together to clear the empty plastic cups and used napkins from the surface. Your hands brush when you both reach for the last cup and you just catch the way Pierre's breath hitches.
You and Pierre have danced this dance since you were teenagers. Each of you knows the steps by heart. The only difference is tonight neither of you were poised to bow out before the final lift.
"Beep beep, bitches!" You yank your hand away when Max's shout reaches you. Pierre's hand lingers in front of him,  outstretched as if your palm remained grazing his thumb. 
Max holds the bottle of vodka over his head as he wades through the crowd. "You're all about to be very, very entertained."
"Where's your chaperone?" You ask Max, searching for Daniel in the low lighting. You press your palm to your thigh, dissipating Pierre's lingering heat.
The Dutchman waves you off. "Went to get us more drinks. Pierre, isn't it kinda hard to do body shots if you're still fully clothed?"
"Who says I'm the one getting undressed?"
Max's grin dimples his flushed cheeks. "I mean you can ask her to take her shirt off in front of all these people if you want to."
"No," Pierre responds quickly. "Fine. I'll do it."
When Pierre strips off his shirt he gets more than a few whistles from men and women alike. That tended to happen when someone was built like a Greek fucking god, you supposed. Whoever voted for People Magazine's "Sexiest Man Alive" and decided on Michael B. Jordan had clearly never laid eyes on Pierre, with his bronzed skin, endless expanses of muscle, and brilliant cheshire grin.
Michael B. Jordan who?
Pierre hands the team branded shirt off and lays out on the table. He pillows an arm under his head, bare bicep flexed as he gets comfortable. Leaning in to kiss along the hard muscle was out of the question, however tempting it was.
Pierre looks up expectantly. "You coming?" 
Holy shit, this was actually happening.
"Yeah, I'm coming." You sink to your knees and Pierre laughs.
"Up here." He pats his thigh with his free hand and beacons you forward. "Please."
Screw it, you've already thrown your friendship out the window. This night ended either in heartbreak or awkwardness, might as well get your money's worth.
A few whoops break out above the music. The bassline isn't the only thing thundering in your chest as you straddle Pierre's thighs, hands braced on his chest.
"Okay?" Pierre whispers for your ears only. You nod with what you hope is a charming smile.
"Alright move," Max says, shooing you back until you're resting on your haunches. Max flicks the cap off the bottle and you grab it to take a long sip.
Max gapes at you and you wipe a hand over your mouth. "Close your mouth, you'll catch flies."
Pierre's thighs tense beneath you in response to your bold declaration. Dozens of Pierre's friends and team members gather around. For all you care, Pierre is the only person in the room.
"Last chance to back out," Max warns. You're too busy tracking the drop of liquid that falls from the neck of the bottle to splash onto the crease of Pierre's abs to bother responding. 
"Pour it out." Pierre's chest sinks with his demand, doing nothing but sparking your imagination, creating images of him heaving beneath you. You'd sell your soul to recreate the way you're currently poised above Pierre's hips with a little less clothing and no audience.
Max gives up hope on you replying and dribbles the alcohol up Pierre's abdomen, stopping just below his pecks.
"Have at 'er-"
Your tongue is on Pierre's skin before Max has finished his sentence. You feel the muscle tense beneath your tongue, going rigid at the first contact. The burn of the vodka doesn't even register as you lap it up, catching the drips that fall over his sides. 
You aren't sure either of you is breathing. Salty sweat mingles with the sharpness of the alcohol, an afterthought barely worth mentioning.
Blame the liquid courage or blame the high from Pierre's win, but you were confident Pierre was enjoying this just as much as you. 
Planting a hand on Pierre's hip, you steal a glance up at him to find him locked on you. You take that as permission to continue, dragging your tongue flat up his stomach and continuing well past where the vodka had been poured. Up between his pecks, over the curve of his throat that bobs beneath your tongue, over his chin until you meet his lips, already parted and waiting. 
Neither of you pay the shouts cresting around you any heed. You've both waited too long for this, endured too many almosts and what ifs to let the opportunity slip through your fingers. Your sticky hands cradle Pierre's face, angling it in a way that's to your liking so you can explore more of his mouth. He tastes like whiskey and mint, the juxtaposition of hot and cold scattering your thoughts. One of Pierre's hands finds the nape of your neck when you gasp for air, refusing to let you end the moment.
And it's pure, unending bliss that floods your veins when he nips at your lower lip, swollen and surely reddened from his kiss. His thumb sweeps across the back of your neck while you both fight to catch the breath currently evading you.
Daydreams didn't hold a candle to the real thing. One taste and you were addicted, craving as much as Pierre was willing to give.  
"Hey," he murmurs, the corners of his mouth tugging up in a stupidly gorgeous smile.
"That was nice," you tease, tangling your fingers in the silky blond strands of his hair. "I wouldn't be opposed to doing it again."
"Me too. Maybe somewhere where it's just us though. I wouldn't want to scandalize my team any further." You manage to steal another sweet peck before Max hauls you off Pierre.
"Fucking finally," Daniel says, clapping when you're upright again. "Do you know how long I've been trying to orchestrate this? The two of you really are dumber than a box of rocks. I can't believe all it took was Max suggesting body shots to get you two to kiss."
The arm that wraps around your waist feels right. Pierre hasn't hugged you like this before, with his chin resting on your shoulder and his nose nuzzling your neck, but it already feels like home.
Pierre ignores Max completely in favor of pressing a kiss to the shell of your ear. "Why don't we go back to my room? I'll pour more alcohol on myself if that's what it takes to convince you."
You're just about to take him up on the offer when one of his team members taps his shoulder. He glances at them impatiently, which the man thankfully doesn't take personally.
"They want some photos with you holding your trophy," he explains, handing a shirt and the star shaped interpretation of the Italian flag to Pierre. "It will only take a few minutes,  they promised not to keep you long."
Of course everyone knew exactly where your minds were. Sanity had long since left the premises, tangled up in crisp white sheets. Pierre's entire team and half the Red Bull garage had seen what had gone down while the prix winner was sprawled on that coffee table. There would be no chance of denying it in the morning. 
And while you'd never imagined that the first time you'd kiss your best friend would be directly preceded by licking copious amounts of shitty liquor off his super-heated skin, now that you'd experienced it any other way seems forgettable.
Pierre sighs and runs a hand through his hair. "I mean, I already have my trophy, but…" your stomach lurches when you realize he means you. Pierre catches the way your mouth hangs open and he shoots you a grin before accepting the real trophy.
"You carry it," he says, not giving you much of a choice as he thrusts it into your hands. "I'm occupied."
You're about to point out that his hands are, in fact, free and that the more likely reason for insisting you carry the trophy was his usual post-race laziness when he slings an arm around your shoulders and tucks you tight to his side.
"Is this okay?" Pierre asks when you involuntarily stiffen. God, it was more than okay, it was perfect, it had just caught you by surprise. You'd only kissed him a handful of minutes ago and Pierre was already wrapped around your finger, smitten as if you'd been a couple for years.
"Yeah no, it's perfect. Simply lovely," you say quickly, stumbling over your words.
"Can I kiss you again?"
Your answer comes in the form of a hand on his chest, stopping him in his tracks. You prop the trophy on your hip and smile up at your race winner.
"You don't have to ask that ever again. My answer is always yes."
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deathbymeow · 3 years ago
Text
Screw Feelings
Chapter 4
1 2 3 4
This chapter has taken me way to long to finish. I really struggled with it and still don't know how I feel about it. So I'm just going to post it and let you decided what you think.
Warning coarse language and sexual content.
Marinette was born a hopeless romantic. If you asked thirteen-year-old Marinette what her future held, she would have gushed about her love for Adrien Agreste. They would be married and have three kids, a hamster, maybe a dog and the perfect house.
Along the way reality broke her and shattered her rose tinted glasses. You know those red love heart shaped ones, yeah you get the point. Now she didn’t even know if she wanted kids and as for Adrien, well let’s just say he was no longer apart of her future. At least not how she once thought he would be. Adrien had never given her any reason to doubt him but yet she could see every way he could break her heart. So, she chose to break his first.
Was it selfish? Yes. Was it cowedly? Hell yes. But after everything she’d done for every single person in Paris it was about time she started to look after herself. It still didn’t make her feel any better or lessen the nightmares but at least she wouldn’t drag Adrien down with her.
She now saw love as nothing but a waste of time. Walls had been built around her heart and she was determined not to let anyone in. The idea of being blinded by love seemed like a weakness. Nineteen small bossy gods were a full-time job on its own. How could she ever trust someone with her heart let alone her secret.
There were very few people that would ever be able to understand her. How many people could say that they’d died to many times to count and been brought back to life by magic. She may not remember what happened after she died but she never forgot the pain before her last breath. Trying to breath with internal bleeding was a bitch and fighting with broken bones not much fun. And, on top of that she’d watched her teammates die only to have to keep going because if she failed there would be no bringing them back.
Yep, she was doomed to be alone forever. It wasn’t like other heroes were just walking around waiting to fall in love with broken ex-heroes who still held the title of Guardian to small mischievous gods. Even with Tikki’s good luck the universe wasn’t that kind.
So why was Marinette curled up on her window seat thinking about a tall, very well built, blue-eyed, snack. She’d replayed their conversation from that morning and found herself smiling at their flirty interaction. They’d only talked for about five minutes after she’d taken out the wanna be thief, but he’d definitely left a lasting impression on her. Even before she’d talked to him, he’d caught her eye. Was it so wrong for her to be thinking about other guys yet? It had only been just over a month since she’d broken up with Adrien.
Her bedroom door opened and Alya barged in pulling her out of her thoughts. It took her a moment to find where Marinette was semi hiding under a fluffy pink blanket.
“Girl, we can’t let you go anywhere without you gettin’ in trouble.” Alya rushed over to her and wrapped her in a big hug.
“Not you too. Has everyone forgotten how to say hello?” Marinette mumbled against Alya’s shoulder.
Alya let her go and sat down next to her. She kicked her shoes off and snuggled under the blanket. “Hello. Now what the hell M?”
“I know Chloe told you everything already Al. I’m not repeating it again. I’m sorry for worrying everyone but it was nothing.” Marinette grabbed Alya’s hand. “I promise ok.”
“Ok. I’m sorry I just want you to be happy. You know that right?” She squeezed her hand back. “And the guy?”
“He was cute.” Marinette smiled and shrugged her shoulders.
Alya raised her eyebrows. “Cute huh?”
“Fine, he was sexy as fuck, but I’m not here for that Al. You’re just as bad as Chloe, you know that?” Marinette laughed and turned back to the window hoping Alya missed her cheeks blush.
“Well, it doesn’t hurt to try out the locals.”
“Oh my god Al.”
“YOLO M. You of all people should know this.” Alya smirked and gave her finger guns.
“You’ve officially been corrupted by Nino. I think I’m going to have to find another BFF.” Marinette shook her head trying not to laugh.
Alya threw herself at Marinette and wrapped her in a tight hug. “Never. There is no escaping me.”
They both burst out laughing and Marinette was thankful for the distraction. Alya and Nino had moved to New York a month before Chloe, Kagami and Marinette moved to Gotham. It meant they were only an hour and a half car trip away instead of an almost 8-hour plane trip.
Marinette’s phone started to ring startling them both. She let go of Alya and rummaged through the blanket to find it. She felt her stomach drop when she saw who was calling her.
“Alya, its Adrien. What do I do?” Marinette whined looking desperately at Alya.
“Answer it M, he knows about today. Not the guy but the other stuff. You can’t ignore him forever, you know that.” She kissed Marinette’s forehead, got up and walked out closing the door behind her.
Marinette took a deep breath and answered. “Hey Adrien.”
“Hey, Princess… sorry I didn’t… I didn’t mean to. Shit.” He mumbled.
Marinette could clearly hear the pain in his voice driving the guilt home even more than she was already feeling. It was her decision, but it still felt raw, and it still hurt to talk to him. He had always been so much more than just her lover but now she was struggling to be any of those things. Over the last four years after all the kissing and sex it had all blended together and it was hard to separate it all.
“That’s ok Adrien, I get it.” Marinette brought her knees up under her chin and wrapped the blanket tightly around her.
“I know you’re probably busy, but I just had to hear your voice. Nino told me what happened. Are you ok Mari?”
“Yeah, I’m fine. I know it was stupid. Everyone’s already told me off.” Marinette said a little harsher than she meant.
“I’m not going to lecture you. It’s just... God, I miss you, bugaboo.” He whispered into the phone.
“Adrien, please don’t.” She begged. His voice sounded so lost.
“I still love you Princess. If you won’t come home, I’ll move for you. I just want to be where you are. We can work this out. Please.”
“Adrien. I can’t do this. I’m sorry.” She hung up before he could say anything else.
Marinette looked at her phone as it started to ring again. The picture she’d assigned to his number staired back at her. It was a closeup of him sleeping with cute bed hair. She would have to change it to something less personal. Unsure of how many times he might try to call she turned her phone to silent and threw it in the direction of her bed. The tears started to fall before she could stop them. She gave herself a moment and then wiped her face. This wasn’t going to ruin her night. The break-up had been her decision, she had to move forwards with her life.
~~>:<~~
Five hours later, after a few drinks and losing herself on the dance floor Adrien was the last thing on her mind. When her eyes landed on the man that had been distracting her thoughts all day, she was surprised at first. He smiled at her and any hesitations she had dissolved. Everything was screaming at her to trust her instincts. There was something about him and she had to find out why she felt so drawn to him.
Marinette quickly told the girls not to wait up for her. They both looked over the man in question and gave their approval. Chloe slapped Marinette’s arse and reminded her about the room before she could escape them. Marinette had already given them both strict instructions not to approach hot book guy. Both girls had agreed on one condition if it ever turned into anything more, they got to do the shovel talk, together.
After a flirty exchange of words at the bar and reassuring Jason that she wasn’t drunk, the two headed up to the room so kindly supplied by her devious bestie. They entered the lift, and Marinette realised she was still holding his hand. Her small hand fit perfectly in his and she looked up at him only to catch him gazing down at her.
“I just want you to know I don’t normally take strange men back to hotel rooms. Not that you’re strange. Argh. I mean this isn’t something I do all the time.” Marinette could feel her cheeks starting to heat and she hated that her mouth seemed to have a mind of its own so she gave up before she could embarrass herself more.
“Don’t stress Pixie. I don’t normally follow strange woman back to their rooms either.” He smiled and winked at her then gently nudged his shoulder against hers. More like his arm against her shoulder because you know, height difference. “I don’t expect anything. I’m just happy I get the chance to find out more about you.”
“It’s nice to know your name so I can stop calling you the hot book guy.” She giggled at the stupid name wondering what he would think about it. The soft smile and slight tint to his cheeks was hopefully a good indication he didn’t mind.
“Sooo, you’ve been talking about me then huh?” He gently squeezed her hand and tilted his head to the side as he asked.
“Well, I had to tell my friends. What kind of friends would they be if they let me go off with a complete stranger? We’ve met once before, for like ten minutes so you’re only like… still kinda a stranger. Wow I have shitty friends.” She laughed as they walked out of the lift.
“Hmm what does your instincts say about me?” He asked following her.
“That I have nothing to worry about.”
“Then I’d say your friends trust you and your judgment.”
“Wise as well as sexy.”
“I have many talents.”
“And clearly not modest at all.”
“Not in the slightest.” He laughed as they stopped in front of the door. Marinette decided she really liked his laugh, and his smile was amazing.
Marinette let go of his hand to open the door. The vodka was still in her other hand and Jason had taken the glasses off her before they got to the lift. They walked into the luxury room together. Marinette hadn’t been in any of the hotel rooms before, but she could tell right away that this wasn’t a stranded room.
Soft light filled the room from candles scatted on the coffee table in front of a plush white couch. Behind the couch large windows took up two of the walls framed with thick velvet curtains. Window seats ran under both windows with silk cushions arranged on them and a large bed sat against the only wall without windows. The oversized bedhead was the same golden velvet as the curtains.
Something was scattered on the bed and as they walked further into the room Marinette realised what it was. On top of the lush black quilt someone who was going to be in so much shit tomorrow had arranged a combination of red rose petals and unopened condoms in the shape of a heart.
Marinette heard Jason snicker behind her. Her cheeks were on fire as she went into damage control. “I’m going to kill Choe.” She mumbled turning to face Jason. “My roommate that owns the club owns the hotel as well. This is her attempt at humour.”
“My kind of humour. And you thought your friends didn’t care.” He playfully nudged her. Taking the bottle of vodka out of her hands he walked over to the couch and sat down.
She followed and sat down next to him watching as he took his jacket off. His black shirt did nothing to hide the way his muscles moved when he threw the jacket on the other seat. The low light made it feel very intimate, but she didn’t feel uncomfortable. In fact, being with Jason felt surprisingly calming. She watched as Jason poured a small amount of vodka into each glass. He passed one of the glasses to her then drank from his.
“Interesting. What flavour is this?” He asked as he picked up the bottle to read the label.
“It’s cotton candy. I had no idea there was so many different flavoured vodkas. I’m working my way through them one bottle at a time.” Marinette downed her drink then put the glass back on the table. “This one isn’t too bad. So far raspberry is my favourite.”
“So, you have a sweet tooth, huh?” He downed the rest of his drink, put his glass and the bottle down then turned his body so he was facing her.
Marinette watched him for a moment. His unusual turquoise eyes glazed into hers and she felt exposed like he could see everything she was trying to hide. The weird thing was she didn’t feel the need to hide from him. This in itself should have made her worried. He was basically a stranger, a hot stranger but still a stranger and she had secrets. Way too many secrets including her pocket gods.
“I grew up in a bakery so I guess you could say that.” Ok that’s safe Marinette. Keep it to the bare minimum.
“You lived in a bakery?” He asked looking genuinely surprised but interested.
“Not in the bakery silly. My parents owned the bakery and we lived in the apartment above it.” Safe answer but Marinette suddenly realised this was not a safe topic by far. Crap abort topic she thought as her hands started to shake.
“Ahh, ok that makes more sense. So, you can bake then?” He asked smiling at her warmly unaware of the pain his questions were inflicting on her heart.
Marinette took a deep breath hoping to steady her voice. “Yeah, I use to bake all the time. Not so much now though.” She answered as she felt her heart start to ache. There was no way she could talk about this without breaking down. “Tell me about you?”
“How ‘bout we take turns. Ask me something and then I get to ask you something.” He took one of her hands in his and the warmth of his skin seemed to ground her. As his fingers traced over her skin it left a tingling sensation in its wake.
“Hmm ok, that seems fair.” She thought for a minute enjoying the physical contact. It was small but somehow just what she needed to bring her back from her troubled past. Her past always felt like a dark cloud hanging over her, somehow without even realising it Jason had broken through. “What do you do for work?”
“Nothing fancy, I’m head of security at the WE. What about you?”
“I was studying fashioned at ESMODE for the last two years while running my own label on the side. I wasn’t happy so I decided to just focus on my commissions for now. Is security something you were always interested in?”
“Nah, I didn’t get the chance to go to college. I had some family stuff come up, so I kinda just fell into the job. I’m good at it I guess, and it pays the bills. What made you decide to move to Gotham?”
“What’s not to love? The weather is amazing and it’s an adventure just to get coffee in the morning. Plus, I don’t mind some of the locals.” She smiled at him, giggling at the way he snicked at her sarcasm.
“Yeah, not sure I’m buying any of those reasons Pixie.” He raised his eyebrows and shook his head laughing. “Try again or miss a turn.”
“Bossy much?” She playfully pushed his shoulder with her free hand.
“Me? Never.” Jason held his hand that wasn’t still holding hers over his heart. “I only wish to know the real you Pix.” His face lit up with the cheekiest smile and she felt her cheeks warm.
“Ugh, fine. Truth is I just needed a change. Chloe got the opportunity to buy this place and it seemed like the complete opposite to Paris so here I am.” She shrugged and pulled out the rose gold hairpins that were holding her hair up.
Her hair fell over her shoulders and she ran her free hand though it to try and calm it down. She caught the way Jason’s eyes were following her every move and she smiled at him. He seemed to be trying to decide something before he reached out and tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear, letting his finger linger against her cheek.
She leant against his hand enjoying how it felt against her skin. “So, this might be a stupid question but what’s your relationship status?”
“That’s not stupid, it’s a valid question. I’m single. Hasn’t been anyone serious for a while. What about you?” He moved his hand from her face and ran it down her arm.
“No, completely single. I was in a long-term relationship but it’s over now.” She looked down at her hairpins in her spare hand. The two hairpins had delicate rose gold wings on the ends. They had been a gift from Chloe and Kagami and she wore them often.
“I want to be sorry Pix, but I don’t think you’d be here if… was it recent?”
“Uh-uh, that’s two questions.”
“Oh come on, it’s still relevant to the first one.”
“Fine, but I get two.”
“Fair.” He nodded in agreement.
“Yes, it’s only been two months. I broke up with him. He didn’t do anything wrong I just wasn’t in love with him anymore. Not in the way I should be anyway.” She looked back up at him. “Happy? Everything you need to know about my ex. I believe it’s my questions now.”
He nodded and she noticed just how close they had become. When had she rested her leg against his and how long had his hand been on her hip? Her hand was still in his and he idly played with her fingers. She hardly knew him but yet everything about this felt right. For someone that had learned to guard herself from strangers she felt surprisingly at peace.
“Have you ever met someone and thought straight away that you wanted… no needed to know them?” She looked back down unable to meet his intense eyes.
“Yes.” He said quickly with conviction. He let go of her hip and gently rested his hand under her chin. His thumb rubbed against her cheek as he lifted her face so he could look her in the eyes.
She held his glaze and took a deep breath. “Why?”
Marinette watched him while he seemed to be deep in thought. This wasn’t why she’d moved across the globe. The breakup between Adrien and herself hadn’t even been publicly announced. It was going to be messy, and she’d left it up to him and his publicist to organise but for some reason it still hadn’t happened. A new relationship was the last thing she needed. She needed to heal before she could move on so why did she feel like this? She was playing with fire, and she knew it.
“Yeah ok so I’m just going to be honest here Pix. When you walked into the coffee shop your smile and arse won me over straight away, but then you winked at me, and I knew right then and there I wanted your number. Then your phone rang you looked so darn cute with that adorable pout on your lips. Yep, the one you’re doing right now.”
“Hey.” She grumbles trying to look offended but failing awfully when she giggled at him.
“You handled the robbery...”
“Failed robbery.” She corrected.
“Sorry. Failed robbery like it was nothing then went full badarse mode on the arsehole. Not gunna lie, complete turn on by the way. I didn’t get to talk to you for long but that’s all it took for you to seal the deal with your adorable personality. I… I’m not good with my emotions. No one in my family is. There’s just something about you.” He was staring intensely into her eyes and while talking had leaned closer to her.
Jason cupped Marinette’s warm cheeks in his calloused hands and ran his thumb softly over her bottom lip. “My turn.”
Marinette was lost in his eyes and the way his hands felt against her skin. She was having trouble forming words, so she nodded never taking her eyes of his.
“Can I kiss you?” He asked softly. His face was so close she could feel his breath against her lips.
Not trusting her ability to not stutter and ruin the moment she closed the gap between them and caught his lips with hers. She felt him smile against her lips as he returned the kiss. Her hands worked their way around his neck and her fingers found their way into his soft hair.
His lips were surprisingly soft against hers and with each second that passed she craved to be closer to him. She bit at his lip, and he moaned allowing her tongue into his mouth. He tasted like vodka with a hint of whisky as his tongue explored her mouth.
They parted for a moment both breathless but wanting more. Marinette needed more, she wanted to feel him against her, for his hands to explore her body while kissing her senseless. With her mind set on what she wanted, she threw her leg over his and straddled him. Now sitting on his lap, with her legs either side of him she could feel what she was doing to his body and a shiver of excitement ran through her.
He smiled wickedly at her before his hands cupped her arse and his lips started to tease her neck. She tilted her head back and moaned as his tongue and teeth moved over her sensitive skin at the base of her throat then up the other side.
His mouth was against her ear, and he whispered, “is this too much?”
“It’s not enough she breathed out before catching his mouth with hers again and grinding against him.
Jason’s hands tightened on her arse and pushed her against him as he moaned into her mouth. This kiss was rougher than the first, filled with hunger and lust. Marinette’s hands made quick work on the buttons on his shirt, and she ran her hands over his sculptured abbs and toned chest before pushing it off his shoulders. He broke the kiss and let go of her so she could take it off.
She hummed in appreciation at his sculptured torso. Tracing her finger over one of the scares that littered his skin he shivered under her touch. He was watching her carefully and she could see the concern on his hansom face. Some may have been turned off by his scars, but it had the opposite affect on her. She had her own scars and to her it just told the story of survival.
Marinette kissed him again breaking away momentarily to breath, “you’re beautiful,” before trailing kisses over his neck and collar bone.
“Nothing can compare.” He groaned as she rocked against him again while biting on his neck. “To your beauty, Marinette.”
She found the scar on his neck and ran her tongue over it earning a deep groan from him. He found her lips again and kissed her deeply then stood up, still holding onto her arse to support her weight. Marinette wrapped her arms and legs around him as he carried her to the bed.
Jason kicked his boots off before kneeling on the bed and laying her down on the rose petals and condoms. He sat back to look at her. He slipped his phone out of his pocket and quickly snapped a photo. “I never want to forget how you look right now.”
Marinette lifted her boot up and nudged his phone out of his hand playfully giggling at his surprised face. “Hey, no photos mister.”
When he got over his momentary shock he started to laugh. “Sorry should’ve asked but you look so beautiful right now.”
“Mm-hmm, surrounded by unopened condoms.” She giggled throwing one at him.
“And rose petals.” He picked a handful of them up and threw then at her laughing when she threw more condoms at him.
Marinette put her healed boot against his chest distracting him before he could throw any more rose petals at her. He looked at her leg covered with her red velvet boot and raised his eyebrow at her. She nodded knowing what he was silently asking.
Jason let his fingers run along the skin at the top of her boot before he pulled the zipper down and carefully took her boot off. She wore knee high lace socks under her boots, and she could tell he liked the look of the black lace against her porcelain skin by the way his eyes lingered on her leg. He ran his hands from the top of her thigh down to the soft lace then pulled it off. She shivered as the sensation of his rough hand against her skin.
He went to do the same to her other leg only to find a deadly looking dagger strapped just under the top of her boot. In the heat of the moment Marinette had forgotten all about her weapon. “Someone told me you can never be to prepared in Gotham.”
He raised his eyebrow at her. “Beautiful and deadly.” He smirked at her and traced his finger over the leather strap holding it against her leg. “Can I?” He asked.
Marinette nodded and watched as he pulled the rose gold dagger from it sheath. Jason turned it over in his hands testing its weight. “Any more hidden surprises?” He asked as he unbuckled the leather strap and sheathed the deadly blade. He placed it on the bedside table then continued to take off her other lace sock.
“Not the type that can kill you.” She smiled up at him innocently. “Unless you have a weak heart.”
Jason laughed and leaned over her. He rested his elbows either side of her but was careful not to touch her yet. “Stamina is my middle name baby.”
His breath tickled her ear. He was so close to her but yet he wasn’t touching her. It was driving her crazy. “Oh, is that so hot stuff?” She wrapped her legs around him and pulled his body to hers. “Prove it then.”
A wicked grin graced his hansom face, and he kissed her hard. The weight of his body pressed her into the bed, and she moaned in pleasure as her hands started to explore his body.
Marinette had never felt so far removed from the girl she used to be, and she loved it. The things Jason did to her body should be criminal and he hadn’t been lying about his stamina. The two hardly slept that night. When their bodies weren’t tangled together pushing each other over the edge time and time again, they were snuggling and playfully debating different topics. Both Marinette and Jason steered clear of any subjects they didn’t or couldn’t talk about due to their extra curriculum activity’s and when they did finally fall asleep in each other’s arms their dreams where nightmare free for the first time in a long time.
Marinette had been honest with him and gently told him she wasn’t ready to start a new relationship with anyone and he’d been understanding. She hadn’t been honest to herself though, this amazing, gorgeous man was doing things not just to her body, but her heart and she could feel herself falling already.
Yep, Marinette was so screwed Jason made sure of that in more ways than one if she thought she could walk away and forget about him after this.
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