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#its been a long time and a whole other blog since I last drew an assassins creed character
tortillaspecter · 1 year
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Just look at yourself!!! 😳🍑🍾 (one like, and I will post the speed paint, including the ugly aa edit I made)
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seafoamreadings · 9 months
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Hi! I really enjoy your blog, and thought I'd throw a question your way that is both astrology and tarot related. I've seen some info online that associates specific tarot cards with a given sign. I think usually these are meant to be read as sun signs, but do you think there's a more accurate way to go about it? What cards do you associate with each sign? Or if you'd rather talk in more specifics, what tarot cards would you associate with Pisces sun, Scorpio moon, Leo rising? Thanks!
ooh fun question, thank you for including tarot!! i like to remind everyone periodically that's where i have my real roots :) i have been doing astrology for a little over 8 years but i have been doing tarot for much, much longer, and my whole entire family is a tarot family - my mom has been doing this since she was quite young so it predates my existence in my genes. i am the only one who does astrology though lol.
those associations are actually what got me into astrology in the first place. i was a tarot-only girl for a long time and scoffed at such frivolous pursuits as astrology ;) (now look at me, lol)
they are usually meant to be the sign itself, not any particular planet in a sign and not any querent's sign. most, not all but certainly most, of these correspondences come from golden dawn and similar ceremonial esoteric traditions, with some deviations from that system like crowley's (although such deviations are still very similar).
so the chariot for example has the correspondence cancer. for at least the RWS deck and arthur waite's plans for it, that was just cancer, not the sun in cancer, not anything in cancer. just that sign, cancer, and its energies.
now, crowley's thoth deck is layered and layered and layered with extra symbolism. the chariot is still cancer. but you have things a little more specific in the minor arcana, like off the top of my head the four of wands in the thoth deck is called completion, and it is associated specifically with venus in aries.
so it's going to depend on what deck you are using, and whether you are comfortable applying eg the crowleyan themes to other decks. nothing stops you from doing that and it can be useful, but it's not necessarily the intended use, and purists might frown on it. i am not a purist.
a lot of modern artists who make their own decks don't necessarily include any such associations. you could choose to read them utterly without the astrology, or you could project one of these systems onto the deck.
personally when i read cards i don't delve into those astrological correspondences UNLESS something pings in my intuition that reminds me to do so. then it turns out to be relevant. but those are strictly intuitive choices i make on a reading by reading, card by card basis. AND in my head/intuition it changes somewhat. i may draw like, a king of cups, and be like oh, some water sign man. could be any of the water signs. at other times i may have the thoth deck in mind or be holding the actual thoth deck, in which case crowley's intended meaning was specifically the degrees in the last decan of aquarius and the first two decans of pisces, and lady frida harris drew a crab on the card, so i might think more specifically of cancer.
there is a story i think from rachel pollack? about drawing the chariot and a diagnosis, medically, of cancer - a weird association with that card but a valid one. (rachel pollack was a very cool lady btw, if you aren't familiar with her, look into her life and work!)
it's all so situational!
just for fun though, with no particular deck in mind and going strictly based on vibes for the big three you mentioned (some folks may disagree with my picks here) i would say page of cups for pisces sun, the high priestess for scorpio moon, three of wands for leo rising. (but there's not really any tradition applied here. just vibes and my brain.)
thanks again for the very cool question, love this :)
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fuckepilepsy · 2 years
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I'm not doing EpileptiCon this year. Or probably ever. You might have figured that out, considering that in the past, I've posted announcements a week or so in advance, but have been silent this year. I probably should have said something sooner.
I know that as the progenitor of the concept, I kinda have a responsibity to be the spearhead of the event, but frankly, it's not worth it anymore. Interest and participation have dwindled every year since it began. When we had the first EpileptiCon in 2017, it was very successful, to the point of being a little overwhelming, so I expected it to grow every year.
But instead, the opposite has occurred.
Granted that 2020 and all of its attendant woes came along and took the piss out everyone, and 2021 wasn't much better. I also acknowledge that I let @the-twitchy-life MC EpileptiCon the last two years by herself. But right now I'm very rested and have ample time to do it, but I just don't have the heart for it anymore.
Here's a secret: last year, only two people entered for the EpileptiCon giveaway. Two. At the end I just bought duplicates of everything and sent them both the prize. If I recall correctly, there were forty-two entrants in 2017.
Furthermore, EpileptiCon prompts have improved every year between contributions from Twitchy and myself (with exception to the aberration that was 2020), but the response has been less robust each year. I don't know why. We've refined our approach, stepped up our game, tried it for a week, tried it for the whole damn month. Has the novelty worn off? Has the culture of the community changed? Is it me? I don't know.
It just seems like there's this core group of people who really care, but fewer and fewer people are really into it as time goes by. I deeply appreciate that core group, and I'm grateful to them for their continued enthusiasm, but it feels silly to go through all that effort--and in the case of the giveaway, all that money--just to see diminishing results.
Anyway. I don't mean to sound bitter or resentful. I'm really not. I'm very grateful to all of the people who have joined the party over the last five years. It's just that for whatever the reason, all of the excitement and anticipation I used to feel about EpileptiCon has become anxiety and dread. So it's time to stop.
I suppose that some element of my apprehension is a growing feeling of alienation from the community on my part. I started my first epilepsy blog in March of 2013. It was the first time that I had explored my identity as an epileptic, and as a disabled person, and the first time that I expressed things that had weighed on me for a long time. It was cathartic and energizing.
But that was a long time ago, and mine is the only remaining blog dating back to then. I've learned, over time, that the epilepsy community on Tumblr is largely ephemeral. For the most part, people drift in and out of it in a matter of days. Sometimes we'll get a new epilepsy blog that announces its presence, only to never make another post again.
And that's fine! Everyone gets to choose how much they want to interact with others, and choose the terms of their involvement with the community. It's just that it leaves me feeling old and out of place. Like I should have called it quits for good years ago.
I miss my old friends and fellow bloggers. I miss a lot of the people I never hear from anymore. I remember their names and the things that I admired about them. I miss ye olden dayes when I could unleash some absurdity or explosive outburst and have a bunch of pals play along. I miss the camaraderie.
The epilepsy community on Tumblr has always been gloomy, but it's just so quiet these days. We used to be an ornery bunch, and I drew a lot of energy from that.
Each passing year brings me farther from what I cherished about the epilepsy community on Tumblr, and I just don't have the heart to run an imaginary Internet festival for epileptics on anymore.
I'm sorry if this disappoints anyone. I feel terribly guilty. However, @haikyuupaladin has announced that they will be posting discussion prompts and keeping the conversation going, and I will be supporting that effort. I hope you will join me.
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culttvblog · 7 months
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Armchair Thriller: Fear of God
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Warning: suicide, cults
In my last post I commented that I don't think I have been completely fair to Armchair Thriller (1978 to 1980). The title places it in a great tradition, of course, of the long-running series Armchair Theatre and its successor Armchair Cinema. The difference, of course, is that Armchair Theatre drew on the older television tradition influenced by the actual theatre, of broadcasting a play in one go on one occasion, but Armchair Thriller's stories are all separated up into several episodes. Except when they're sewn together as TV films. I swear when I started blogging about old TV I had no idea how much like being an archaeologist it is, often like assembling the pieces of a pot and still not being sure about it, but I had better warn you that you will find the episodes of Armchair Thriller in several redactions online, and at least one series is also around in film form.
The other thing which fractures Armchair Thriller is that its episodes were made by two independent TV complanies, mostly by Thames Television, but two serials were made by Southern Television. As a result if you buy the DVD box set which describes itself as the complete series, it only includes the Thames serials and not the Southern ones. It's absolutely maddening, as so often in the world of old TV.
Fear of God has good snappy episode summaries on IMDb which I will try not to reproduce but I'm going to be absolutely frank here and say that I am sorry that I have so far managed not to see Fear of God because it contains all the things which virtually guarantee that I'm going to love it.
It starts with the classic intrepid-reporter-after-a-lead-that-everybody-wants-buried-including-the-police trope, which I already love. The reason is that a young woman has killed herself by jumping off the roof of the near-derelict building he lives in, and she has left a diary behind, of course. We have other threads in the shape of the condemned building which the reporter, Paul Marriott, is obviously keen to keep standing, and his recent divorce.
It turns out the woman belonged to what was then called a cult, and even if I wasn't already in love, my heart would have melted. I LOVE cults, or new religious movements as they were referred to when I was a young theology student in the nineties. SInce then both scholars and the public have gone back to calling them cults in distinction to more respectable religions. I'm hoping that one of these days the population notice that established, respectable religions also tend to function exactly the same as cults, just with the difference that the charismatic founder is dead, but that's another matter entirely. The cult in Fear of God is somewhat wooden without too much detail on its cultic workings, but that's OK because the serial is just getting started on the weird shit.
You could be forgiven for thinking that the first episode is perhaps a little slow and that this is going to be a straightforward mystery. However once the cult appears the show ramps up the pace and introduces a whole layer of science fiction, about sonic weapons used by the cult, which takes this one well out of standard mystery territory. From a pedestrian start as a mystery this show really throws all sorts of stuff at the viewer and even on my (currently) third viewing I'm still trying to get my head round it.
In fact this is much of the criticism of this episode online, that it isn't what it seems like it's going to be. This is a valid criticism, I think, and if it wasn't that the other stuff it introduces was so very me, I would probably agree. Perhaps a variation of this criticism could be that I think this four-part TV serial could in fact have been a film. In a film-length time I think the various elements could have been introduced at a different pace and avoid the feeling that it's changing tack part way through.
I spotted some dissatisfaction in the reviews with the way this complex plot is resolved: you will not be surprised to know that it's resolved by introducing something completely off the wall. I'm not going to tell you what it is because I don't want to spoil it, but suffice to say I roared with laughter at how it's done and wouldn't criticise the resolution personally.
I would praise the entire cast for excellent performances at some very intense and difficult roles. It is another peculiarity of the way the show develops that some quite key characters are only seen in one episode, so you don't get that much of some of these excellent performances. I would particularly single out Robert Austin depicting sheer fanaticism as the cult leader. This is something incredibly difficult to do without turning the leader into a one-dimensional caricature but he manages to do it for the approximately thirty seconds for which we see him. Another excellent performance is Peter Settelen as a drug addict who gets involved - again a very difficult role to do convincingly without caricaturing, but he makes the role a nuanced, insightful performance. With drug addiction, obviously. Settelen has appeared in many shows which are probably a bit later than what you will see here, but he is perhaps best known for having been Princess Diana's voice coach, so isn't just an actor.
My personal verdict is that this is one of those shows you watch for the journey rather than the map. If you require tight plotting and clear arcs through the mystery, I don't think this will be your sort of thing, and I think a lot of the perplexed reviews online are from people who really don't like this sort of show.
Fear of God is an excellent, layered thriller, although its far-ranging plot might not be pleasing to all.
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Sixty-Two: XIV Temperance (Reversed)
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Temperance is reason's girdle and passion's bridle, the strength of the soul, and the foundation of virtue. -Jeremy Taylor
God turns you from one feeling to another and teaches by means of opposites, so that you will have two wings to fly, not one. -Rumi
Nor love, nor honour, wealth nor pow'r, Can give the heart a cheerful hour When health is lost. Be timely wise; With health all taste of pleasure flies. -John Gay, Fables
Besides each one of us working individually, all of us have got to work together. We cannot possibly do our best work as a nation unless all of us know how to act in combination as well as how to act each individually for himself. The acting in combination can take many forms, but of course its most effective form must be when it comes in the shape of law — that is, of action by the community as a whole through the lawmaking body. -Theodore Roosevelt, The Strenuous Life: Essays and Addresses
Some cards come easy, and some cards don't. Temperance is definitely in that latter category for me. When I first started making my notebook and had my initial run of twenty-five cards before I started this blog, Temperance was the first card I drew. As a result, the notes I made for this card set the format for all others to follow; yet, being the first, my notes were tentative and messy. I feel I am somewhat at a disadvantage for this card as a result of this and, as it has been nearly ten years since I last saw this card, it still retains a lot of mystery for me.
That's not to say that I don't get its basic tone. Out of Bunning's themes, the most resonant is "balance". It defines the card for me and forms the focus for my intuition to immediately follow. Upright, things are harmonic and at equilibrium, they co-operate and there's a sense of security. Reversed, things are discordant and imbalanced, unco-operative and that sense of security is blocked. And were that the full theme of the card, this card would be very familiar and, interruptions aside, I would have written this blog sooner rather than struggle with trying to pinpoint what energy in my life is being signposted here, and how. But this card is of the Major Arcana, and thus has greater significance than balance's lesser Two of Pentacles. Hence, the very name of the card itself literally and recursively tempers these themes.
But what does temperance mean? The word may immediately bring to mind the alcohol temperance movements of a century ago; but, that to me suggests its intended outcome of abolition. And that is one extreme of a swinging pendulum, with the other extreme being excess. Temperance calls for that midway point, that balance, that middle-ground. Compromises, not absences nor wholesale admittance. Dams are built across rivers not to stop water from flowing downstream, but to control it. Mitigation and moderation. That summary is basically another of Bunning's themes, an eponymous one. Fairchild's diagnosis is also along these lines, although he then goes on to suggest that perhaps the querent is not being objective, that others have closed minds and that one needs to see the other side of the story. I feel his words are perhaps too attached to one thread of thought stemming from this card.
Temperance also brings to mind another idea, and that's of temper-ing. Thirteen runs with this theme as the basis for his analysis, where he describes the RWS angel as combining fire and water to make something new. Paschkis, while having a woman rather than an angel, still uses the RWS-like imagery of two pitchers, but has the sun and the moon, and the tortoise and the hare. Bunning also has "combination" as one of her themes. For me, though, tempering brings to mind the blacksmithing system in Legend of Mana, where a player can make their weapons and armour out of found materials, and then temper it through a long, if somewhat repetitive process, where, little by little, the characteristics of that weapon or armour change. Various endemic, mystical spirits come to the fore as feathers or scales or little odd things get added as the item is forged and reforged again and again, leaving behind an imprint of their presence in (hopefully) improved statistics. In such a way, I see Temperance as referring to this sort of situation where, rather than the sheer combination of opposites, the addition of little seemingly unrelated elements give something new energies. It's not the creativity or passion of Cups and Wands, nor the know-how or the materials of Swords and Pentacles, but a blending of all of them in the right measure.
This blending is also what gives rise to the further esoteric connections of this card. Thirteen says that Sagittarius is the sign that Temperance relates to, Paschkis has included the symbol in her drawing, and it makes sense: the combination of the bow and arrow makes an effective weapon out of two fairly useless components on their own. In turn, this is wielded by the centaur, the combination of the human and horse. I bring special attention to this as I have learned that Sagittarius is my Ascendant and, on further reading and looking at my natal chart, the sign is governed by Jupiter, which was in Capricorn, which further exudes the combinatory aspects of which Temperance speaks. This card seems to suggest a greater personal significance for me than I first imagined.
It's Bunning who throws me a curveball in analysis this time, and that's of the theme of "health". I suppose that homeostasis is, in effect, the blending and moderation of various elements in one life, and that the card speaks of good physical, mental and spiritual health when viewed through its lens. Brigit lends nothing to add to this aspect, but her analysis refers to staying composed, following the middle path, taking the moderate approach to long term goals and even higher learning.
So with this all said, I still find myself scratching my head. Temperance appears to be a sign in the form of a hammer and tongs, just like the ones in Legend of Mana: in and of itself, ineffective, until they are used in combination. It's both a sign and a tool, and perhaps the catch-cry for many solutions should a spread point towards it. But a tool doesn't always come with a set of instructions; I've never seen a hammer come with a manual. Thus, how does Temperance get used? That is perhaps what I find the most puzzling about this card, and the seat of its mystery for me, because it's not about prescription but experimentation. It doesn't call a querent to do this, but to try this. And along the way, one needs to expect failures among those successes, a lesson that I feel I need to impart whenever this card comes into play.
Yet, with this card Reversed, I feel even more confused. Jumping onto the Blockage Bandwagon (capitalised for effect), I could say that fire and water are being prevented from combining. But what does that mean? This card is highly metaphorical, which means that concrete descriptions are actually quite fluid; the precise definition is of something quite broad. I feel as if this card has been a signpost saying "this way" and pointing into a desert. Fairchild diagnoses others playing to win, lots of posturing, to avoid being self-centered or foolish yet remain skeptical, to be kind and accept kindness while listening to one's higher self...not exactly ideas that I find congruent with instability. That there seems like the boiled-down kernel of this card Reversed, "instability", but even Upright the formation of blended results comes from the forcing of an unstable state to make things malleable. Is this perhaps a Nascent or Waning time? Is Temperance Inappropriate or Superficial? My intuition says no. I find myself turning to Brigit once more, where she suggests it is a period of self-evaluation and of self-healing; and while her words are comforting and resonant, in terms of music it's a section of the orchestra off doing their own thing quietly but subtly in the background.
Given the message from my Reversed old friend, the Three of Cups, I have been a little more spendthrift than usual with my time and energy and, indeed, my money. It's all come to a head today, though, when I woke up and felt too unwell to work. Brigit's words also make a Reversed Temperance a card to heed a warning of not overdoing things, of aspects being out of moderation, and even of a warning sign that something is not quite right and to listen to that inner voice before it becomes too big to ignore. While I don't feel that things have become that dire, it does remind me that I need to be careful with my resources. And despite my initial dismissal, Fairchild's words are finding greater resonance given the very interesting times at work, where my store manager became persona non grata in the blink of an eye amidst an environment of posturing and playing to win that yet continues; indeed, not believing everything I hear is proving to be a good strategy amidst this time of upheaval, of instability, of imbalance.
So, I feel as if the last few cards have pointed out a maelstrom of energies around me that I've tried to address, and despite the shaky ground I find myself on at the moment, I've been quietly cultivating a greater sense of self-confidence that is helping me to weather the storm so far. Temperance Reversed, though, has pointed out the hurricane around me, and that I must try to stay in the calm central eye wherever it may move. That place it's moving to seems to be where the Page of Cups resides; and like the last five cards before it, it too is Reversed. Another lesson awaits.
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babycharmander · 4 years
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If you think you have never stolen artwork, read this post.
So, art theft. If you've been a follower of mine, you've heard my barely-coherent rants about this before, but I thought it might be more productive to make a more coherent post on the subject.
If you're wondering about the title of the post here, it's because I feel like a lot of people aren't really grasping what exactly art theft is, and a LOT of people, even well-meaning ones, do it without even realizing it.
"But wait," you say. "I would never STEAL from an artist!! I never claim it as my own!" And that's all fine and good, but you're missing something here.
To start things off, what IS art theft? (It's not what deviantART said it was several years back, I'll tell you that much. *cough*)
We all know what art is, so let's talk about theft. Dictionary.com defines "theft" as "the act of stealing; the wrongful taking and carrying away of the personal goods or property of another; larceny." Okay, makes sense, but what about that other word there, stealing? Dictionary.com defines "steal" as "to take (the property of another or others) without permission or right, especially secretly or by force."
From those definitions, we can go on to define art theft as, specifically, "taking art without permission or right." In the context of art, that typically involves reposting it (not reblogging--reblogging is different) or using it for other things.
And there, my friends, is the issue.
If something is taken or used without permission, it is stolen. Permission is the important thing here--if an artist says "oh yeah, you can go ahead and use this!" then it's not stolen. You have their permission. But if you DON'T have that, then it IS stolen. It IS theft.
"But I'm not claiming it as my own!" you say. But you don't have to claim it as your own--the act of taking it in and of itself is an act of theft.
"But I said 'credit to the artist!'" The "credit" thing is a whole other conversation, but here's the short of it: The entire point of credit is to direct people to the source of something. If you are not directly linking to where you got the art from, you are not giving credit. "Credit to the artist" is not actually credit of any kind whatsoever. (Also, Google and Pinterest are not sources.)
"But I DID link back to the artist!" Okay, now this is where it may get confusing, because you may think you're covered because you actually did give credit. Here's the problem: if you reposted it or used it without permission, regardless of whether you gave credit or not, it's still stealing.
I'm bolding this because it's a point that a lot of people get tripped up on. Let me explain it this way: If you went into your neighbor's house and took something of theirs without their permission, but you told people "oh yeah, I got this from [neighbor]'s house!" that that would still, of course, be stealing, and it's no different for art.
Another thing is that even when you credit, people don't always check the source. Very recently I found a case where someone had reposted a piece of artwork of mine to Pinterest that was deliberately made to look like it came from the source material (it wasn't meant to confuse anyone, though--the description of my original post made it very clear that it was fanart). The person who reposted had linked back to my original post. The problem? The comments had people asking if this was official, where it happened in the source material, etc. Despite the fact that the source was right there, no one thought to look at it.
Even if you link back to the source, if you did it without the artist's permission, it's still stealing, and still causes problems for us artists.
"But I just posted it to my Pinterest--" DO NOT DO THIS. DO NOT POST AN ARTIST'S WORK TO PINTEREST IF YOU DO NOT HAVE THEIR EXPLICIT PERMISSION TO DO SO.
"But this artist friend of mine says they're okay if I post their work to my Pinterest so long as I link back to them!" Good for your friend! But the fact that your friend is okay with it doesn't mean that all artists are okay with it. For me, personally, I am very not okay with my work being posted to Pinterest, and say as much on my art blog description and posts (which people tend to ignore).
The problem with Pinterest--and reposting art in general--is that we artists don't know when it happens unless we're told, or unless we find it ourselves. It causes us to lose control of our art. And because of this, our art can spiral further out of our control, because when our works get posted to Pinterest or other similar websites, people who have no grasp whatsoever on how art works will just take it as "free art" and then use it for whatever they want.
That's how a piece I spent 20+ hours on was used as a poster for a paid event, without my permission, and without any payment or credit to me.
If an artist has said nothing about Pinterest (or other similar image sharing sites), your default should be to assume that they don't want their artwork posted there.
"Well I didn't repost someone's art, but I did use it for my avatar/RPing icon/video/fic cover/photo edit--" That's still stealing. If you're using it without their permission for any reason, that is stealing. Not to mention, the artist may not be cool with what you're using their art for anyway. (Looking at you, people who use platonic art in your shipping videos.)
“I MEANT to ask them for permission, but I forgot!” This can ONLY happen if you used the artwork BEFORE you asked for permission. You can resolve this by asking for permission BEFORE you use it, rather than assuming the answer will be “yes” and using it before asking.
"But it took me a really long time to make that icon/video/cover/edit!!" How long do you think it took the original artist to draw their piece? It doesn't matter how much work you put into modifying someone else's art--if you're doing it without their permission, you're still stealing.
"But I couldn't find the original artist! I tried to find them, I really did, but I couldn't. Is it okay to use their art then?" No, because you still don't have permission, and by reposting it anyway, you’re continuing to make the artwork spiral out of their control.
"What if I found the artist, but they speak a different language from mine? I can't ask them for permission, so is it okay if I repost their art anyway?" NO!! DO NOT DO THIS!! If there is a language barrier, use Google translate or find someone to translate for you and get a hold of the artist that way to ask them for their permission. The language barrier is NEVER an excuse to steal artwork. There are plenty of non-English-speaking artists who have taken ALL OF THEIR ARTWORK OFFLINE because the art theft was completely out of control. (And this isn't just exclusive to English-speakers stealing art from people who don't speak their language. It happens artists who don't speak English stealing art from English-speakers, too, but as this post is written in English it doesn't do much good for me to rant about this here.) If you can’t ask their permission, do not use it!!
"But what about reblogging?! Isn't that the same as reposting?? Should we not reblog art at all then?" No, reblogging (or retweeting) is not the same as reposting. If you reblog art, you keep all the information that we attached to the art, including our blog name and the description attached to the art. Reblogging/retweeting actually helps us artists A LOT, so as long as you're reblogging from the original artist (and not someone who's reposting their art), by all means, reblog our art!
"What if I just want to share someone else's artwork on Discord or show it to a friend?" This one's a bit different and is not actually as problematic. If you want to share our work on Discord or whatever, just link directly to where we posted it. Please don't post the art itself, unless you're doing it alongside a link because Discord won't show a preview or something.
"What about a forum or a site like Reddit?" This one's a bit different, since due to the way Reddit functions, if you LINK to the art, you have to go directly to the artist's original page to view it. (At least, that’s what it’s like the last time I was active there.) In a way it's roughly the same as with Discord--be sure you're linking directly to the actual post rather than just uploading the art on its own--but I would also ask the artist if they're okay with it, because they may be a member of the subreddit or forum and want to post it themselves, or they might not want their work shared to specific communities. (Some communities have a function where a bot will repost the artwork to Imgur, and some artists don't want that done with their art.)
"What if I'm saving it to my computer/phone to look at later, or making it into my desktop/phone wallpaper?" IMO this is fine, since your computer/phone files aren't public, and neither is your wallpaper. It's only a problem when you post it to public places without our permission.
"What if it's art I commissioned?" Well... like... in that case, it's art you paid for, so unless the artist you commissioned laid out very specific terms for you, you should be good to use that art. Like, at most, the artist may ask you to credit them somewhere in your blog description if they drew your icon or something, or credit them in a fic description if you commissioned a fic illustration from them, or something to that effect. It's really something you should have already worked out with the artist beforehand, but for the most part you should probably be fine to use art you paid for however you like.
"What about art I requested?" This is a bit different from commissioned work. Just because the art was drawn at your request doesn't mean it's explicitly yours (unless it's like, a drawing of your original character or something). Some artists take requests more as suggestions, so the art they draw in response to a suggestion or request is still theirs. Treat this as you would any other artwork and ask the artist for permission first before you do anything with the artwork you requested from them.
“What about NFTs?” ... Okay this one I can’t really go over too much because I barely understand it in the first place, but NFTs are BAD for artists and are a form of art theft. Do not turn people’s art into NFTs. This is a crappy thing to do. (If you want more information on this one, you’ll have to look it up yourself. It’s a form of cryptocurrency and it’s confusing.)
“If you don’t want your art stolen you shouldn’t post it in the first place.” This is fascinating logic. Try applying it to something else and see how it holds up. “If you don’t want your merchandise stolen, you shouldn’t open a booth.” “If you don’t want to get poisoned you shouldn’t eat food.” “If you don’t want to get punched in the face, don’t walk outside.” Yes. Flawless logic. Truly.
"Why do you care so much, anyway?! I'm sharing your art because I like it! That's a compliment! Shouldn't you be happy?" Well, we're certainly glad you like our art, but the problem is... as I've said before, reposting our art causes us to lose our control over it. When we lose control of our art, that damages our livelihood. As I said before, other people have made money off of my artwork. As well, some artists lose jobs because when their potential employers check out their portfolio, they may find artwork that's been reposted everywhere online, so they cannot hire the artist because they believe they may have stolen the artwork in their own portfolio.
Your reposting an image you thought was cute to Facebook or Pinterest could cost an artist their job. Think about that.
So, tl;dr, keep this in mind: you need the artist's permission to repost or use their artwork. If you do not have it, it is stealing, even if you credit the artist.
I know this post is really harsh in places, but this is such an important thing for all artists, and there's so many misconceptions about art theft online. And I feel like one of the biggest problems is that when some people see posts on art theft, they ignore them, because they think they've never done it or would never do it, so that's why I worded this post the way I did. I'm not trying to hurt anyone--I just want people to understand what art theft is, how it affects us artists, and how you can avoid it. Thank you for reading.
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midnightwinterhawk · 3 years
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I put together a little collection of Sterek and Steter fics for funsies. “Just a few fics”, I thought, “nothing too crazy.” Thirty fics later I had to cut myself off and finalize the list. You can thank @the-cookie-of-doom​ for the inspiration. 
These primarily fall under the Hurt Stiles Stilinski category because I apparently like to see my comfort characters suffer. Most of these have hopeful/happy endings but mind the tags. For reals.
Placed under a cut since I have no self control and this turned into a long post.
Sterek
adore to see your eyes fly by @1001cranes
(11,309 l E)
stiles is a pyromaniac, derek is a sociopath. a match made in some kind of heaven. teen wolf kink meme fill.
take my heart from me by @areiton
(23,188 l NR)
He didn't really mean to adopt Derek's pack of puppies. He didn't mean to make himself important to them.
To Derek.
He just wanted to keep them all safe.
That's all Stiles ever wanted.
"Why Can't You?" by @asterekmess
(3,602 l T)
Now. This was happening now, and he couldn’t be less prepared.
-
After a long night, things between Stiles and his father come to a head.
And You Say You're Alone by bi_leigh_bi
(30,314 l E)
Between the kanima, the Argents, and Peter's untimely return from the dead, everything has fallen apart. Stiles and Derek try to put their lives back together once the crisis has passed. Stiles deals with the aftermath of being tortured, and the distance growing between he and Scott. Derek attempts to become a stronger alpha and keep his pack safe, and that includes Stiles.
A Victory March by @churkey
(2,688 l T)
When Stiles is eight he learns that nothing will be the same. His dad comes home one day after work and sits Stiles down for a talk. He explains that werewolves and all the monsters are real.
They're real and not hiding under anyone's bed.
Bury the Moon by darthjamtart
(16,592 l M)
First things get bad. Then they get worse. Stiles doesn’t know what he’s sacrificed until it’s too late.
Dying is the easy part.
Love's Violent Delights by @dexterous-sinistrous
(10,685 l E)
Derek caught the way the man’s eyes looked over Stiles before lingering on his ass. He waited for the clerk to place the key on the counter before he reacted.
Stiles startled at the loud noise, turning away from the pamphlets in the display box to see Derek pinning the clerk’s head against the counter. He drew in an even breath, looking between the struggling man and Derek.
Derek briefly looked at Stiles, hesitating before he saw the gleam of excitement in Stiles’ eyes and the hint of lust in his scent. “Ever look at him, or any other Omega, like that again, and I’ll slice your eyes out with my claws.” He shoved the man back, not caring of the commotion that was made as he snatched up the key from the counter.
Empty by @discontentedwinter
(48,034 l M)
Jordan Parrish is the new sheriff of Beacon Hills, a town haunted by its past.
Your Vision Borrows Mine by hazyascent
(188,781 l E)
Stiles has encountered a fair share of monsters before, way out of his league - the kinds that children are afraid are hiding in their closets and under the bed.
He’d even become one himself when he was void. The nogitsune was in his house, his body, and his mind.
But the worst monster he’s ever faced took even more from him and got away with it.
It’s why Stiles has never really been as terrified of werewolves and kanimas and darachs as he should have been. They’re really not that scary, relatively speaking, and he has a whole team on his side. They always found a way to win - until they lost someone they really loved.
Stiles doesn’t know how to be normal, not after everything he’s done and everyone he’s hurt. The nogitsune is gone, but another monster is on its heels.
His uncle is back. And Stiles has never felt more alone.
It Was a Wednesday by @isthatbloodonhisshirt
(80,129 l M)
“What happened? Where are you? What’s that sound?”
Derek jumped, having momentarily forgotten Scott was on the phone with him because Stiles had started moving. He’d stalked over to the other side of the cave, still eying Derek warily and growling, then settled protectively over a mass of clothes, leaves and animal innards. It was probably where he was sleeping.
Lovely. No wonder he smelled like death.
“Stiles,” Derek said, answering Scott’s question. Or, one of them, at least.
“Stiles? What do you—Stiles is making that noise?”
“Yes.”
“Why?”
“How fast do you think you can make it to the south lot of the Preserve?”
Tiny Houses by @ohmyjetsabel-blog
(77,183 l E)
"So this is what Stiles does. He lies in Scott’s bed and waits for Melissa to say she’s found someone to get it out of him, to cure him of the wrongness and the bad, and he dreams.
God, he dreams.
He dreams of fire and swollen bellies and that scene in Alien, of giving birth to jackals through his urethra, the whole horrific nine yards. His head is a terrible place to be, he can’t imagine his stomach is much better, why anyone would want to put a thing inside of it."
I'm There in the Water by @spaceprincessem
(15,878 l T)
“But it’s—” Derek paused, his words unsure, “it’s not like us,” he swallows hard, chin dipping to his chest in frustration, “it’s like a…”
“An abomination,” Stiles finished, nodding his head as he finally lets his gaze really look at Derek since Scott had pulled them from the water.
He suddenly wished he hadn’t because the way Derek looks at him makes Stiles feel like he is ten years old again. Like Derek is seeing him for the first time since they accidentally fell into each other’s orbit all those years ago. Like Stiles isn’t a burden or invisible.
Like he is enough.
Or five times Stiles felt like he was drowning and the one time he finally caught his breath
Gunplay is Not Really Our Kink by theroguesgambit
(2,577 l M)
“The rules to the game are simple. One bullet, six chances. You pick it up and take turns pulling the trigger on the other man, or we gun you both down right now. You play along, only one of you has to die. Fun game, huh?”
--
Derek and Stiles are captured by a group of hunters and forced to play a twisted game that only one of them might walk away from.
The Price by theroguesgambit
(18,452 l M)
Stiles must surrender the most important thing in his life to protect the town… and no one can figure out what it was.
Nieważny by Zethsaire
(2,037 l E)
The pack is gone, everything they've ever cared for destroyed. Now Stiles and Derek hunt the hunters, taking revenge in the only way they know how; blood.
Steter
Make Me Bleed by @asarcasticwitch
(2,304 l E)
Peter’s expression contorts, impressed or surprised, Stiles can't decipher, but the grin on his face proves he’s not exactly disappointed with the unexpected turn of events.
“Which bite exactly were you hoping for, hm?” The older man curls one hand around the back of Stiles’s neck, trailing his thumb along his pale, fragile throat.
Stiles tilts his head back in unyielding submission, giving the wolf no room to debate his sincerity. “I’m sure you can figure it out, Alpha.
Two Roads Converge in a Graveyard Town by @cywscross
(15,645 l T)
The Deadpool brings one more assassin to Beacon Hills. A man's gotta eat after all.
when you're going through hell (keep going for me) by cywscross
(57,022 l T)
Peter is abandoned in the aftermath of the fire, and Eichen House takes ruthless advantage. Six years later, when he's finally able to move again, he finds himself in a cell with a boy in a straitjacket.
(Kate’s biggest mistake was letting Peter live. Eichen House’s biggest mistake was letting Peter meet Stiles.)
Don't Fail Me Now by @discontentedwinter​
(36,315 l E)
Stiles goes to Derek looking for help.
He finds Peter instead.
Peter takes what he's wanted for a very long time.
Sanctuary by DiscontentedWinter
(56,525 l M)
The Hale Wolf Sanctuary isn’t just for wolves.
It turns out it’s for Stilinskis as well.
Bite Down by EclipseWing (@shadow-of-the-eclipse)
(27,586 l M)
In which Stiles is forced to survive the zombie apocalypse with a sociopathic murdering werewolf for company.
Into Eden by @graciebirdie
(12,232 l M)
Stiles deciding to bring home the stray alpha he'd hit with his jeep probably made him certifiable, if it hadn't turned out Peter was as crazy as he was.
Before you let go (and the light takes you in) by Issay
(4,032 l E)
Stiles makes one last errand - goes to leave flowers on all the other graves. Fuck, so many graves. The grief is as endless and as inescapable as the sky.
He goes home and there is a thing wearing his father's face, waiting for him in the kitchen.
Call My Name by KouriArashi ( @gingersnapwolves )
(81,370 l M)
After moving to Beacon Hills, Stiles starts having recurring dreams of a man in some kind of prison, who needs his help. Things get so bad that he ends up in Eichen House, where he finds out that the man is real.
Hide my tears in the rain. by MrsRidcully
(6,865 l M)
After  years spent successfully dodging werewolves, evil spirits and wendigos,  it was a drunk driver who stole his Dad, a drunk driver with a  suspended license and a record sheet as long as Stiles’s arm. Stiles  would have laughed at the irony if he hadn’t been so busy screaming.
In My Veins Like Disease by romanoffbarton
(1,140 l T)
He tries to leave once.
Foreshock by @twothumbsandnostakeincanon
(22,816 l E)
The day Stiles’ mom died, he almost leveled his house.
Not on purpose. Not even by mistake, really. More by instinct.
Since then he's dug his fingers into everything his has left, holding on with desperation.
Desperation never stopped an earthquake.
Your Touch is My Choice by twothumbsandnostakeincanon
(2,171 l T)
The first time John does it, Stiles is two years old and about to run into the road.
“Mieczysław!” Heart pounding, John grabbed him by the back of his neck and got a hand around his tummy, snatching him back. “No, you have to stay away from the road,” he said firmly.
Shameful Company by Whispering_Sumire (@whispering-sumire755)
(38,779 l E)
"Did I turn into a unicorn?" Peter asks dryly, and Stiles glares at him for a moment before the laughter bubbles up, unbidden, nearly unwilling, and he looks so surprised at the sound, his shock dimming it for a moment before it bursts through with even more trembling ferocity. A long, thin, willowy hand curls into a soft fist over his mouth, and he's shaking, frail, more tears falling, but the copper of his eyes are glowing, crinkling around the edges and scrunched with mirth.
"No," Stiles chokes, chuckling wetly. "No, fuck you, a unicorn? What, like, Rainbowcreep? Zombiesparkle?"
[About a year before the fated Hale fire, Peter starts having nightmares that involve a woman with red hair. The nightmares lead to a spell that brings a man back through time, and, eventually, though the time-traveler is traumatized in the most horrific ways, and Peter's never been good with or for people, in general, they develop a bond that neither of them expects.]
Would You Forgive Me If I Called You Hope, Peter Hale? (Hope, By Any Other Name) by Whispering_Sumire
(10,099 l T)
Stiles has scars. He owns that, he accepts it, he's cataloged and memorized every single one, he's hyper fucking aware of them all.
//
"What do you want, Peter?" Having the more untrustworthy of the Pack getting protective weirds him the fuck out, leaves an odd fluttering in his chest, like moths, waiting perilously and suicidally to be burned.
He doesn't like it.
"You're injured," the man says, "and whatever it is, it's put you in enough pain that I nearly fainted when I-"
"- Used your werewolf mojo on me without my permission?" Stiles smirks, and Peter gives him a black look, crossing a leg over his knee and smoothing out some invisible wrinkle on his pants.
"Tell me the truth Stiles, how bad is it?"
[Or: The one where Stiles has scars, is more than a little fucked up, and Peter notices. He helps.]
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RESISTERE TENTATIONEM: CAPITULUM II
TĒCTUS: Covered, concealed, hidden, having been covered, hidden or concealed
Pairings: Damian Priest x Reader
Warnings: +18, mature content
Editor: @thenightmareismyreality
Tag: @ziasaph , @theworldofotps , @alyhull , @bellalutionn , @aerynscrichton , @serpantscorpio8497 , @ava-valerie , @omegasshyghuleh6661ghosts , @squirreledelman , @cazxcx , @sophiewolfheart-blog , @bayley-no-friends , @waywardwrestlewritingwaif , @sassymox
Notes: I would like to thank @letsgivethisonemoreshot , for not only being my partner in crime with this trilogy but also being one of the best friends someone could ever have 😘 This is fully written in Damian’s POV. If you’d like to check out my previous works, you can find them on my Masterlist
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Want to hear a joke that’s really in poor taste? The Mother Superior of the famous Mary Magdalene Convent (isn’t that ironic) is being accused of hosting ‘parties’ to the oh so loving convent donors. And you know who isn’t invited to those parties? Jesus Christ. Because the Devil sure loves to be a part of them! Drugs, orgies, alcohol, prostitution, even black masses... you name it! Everything that is unholy happens in the so-called house of holiness, and if that isn’t a bad taste joke, I don’t know what is.
So here I am now, driving towards the Devil’s den: the Mary Magdalene convent for three torturous days of interviews. Out of all of the reporters from The New York Times, of course I was the one who drew the short straw and got assigned this article. Some people see this as a career changing opportunity... a blessing, but me? I see it as a fucking curse! I don’t like religion, I don’t like churches, I don’t like priests and I sure as hell don’t like nuns! Anything that has the word “holy” in it, I prefer to be as far away as I possibly can from. But today was not my lucky day….no, today was the day that I was going to be tested. The only thing I’m hoping for is to not fail.
I knocked on the convent’s door and a young lady answered me.
“Hi, good morning. I’m Damian Priest, reporter from The New York Times and I’m here for an interview with” I looked down at my notepad “Mrs. Y/N L/N? Whom I believe is the Mother Superior”
The young girl only nodded once and motioned for me to follow her, without saying a word.
I followed her in, mesmerized by the size of the convent, the whole place was fancy as fuck on the inside. Art pieces from famous painters were displayed on the walls, modern furniture, dim lights that made the place look cozy and inviting. *What a scam* I thought to myself. The young lady in front of me suddenly stopped walking and pointed towards the door in front of her before turning around and leaving.
Presuming that it was the Mother Superior’s office, I knocked on the door twice before someone told me to come in. You see, when they told me I was going to be interviewing the Mother Superior of a convent, the last thing I expected was for her to not only be beautiful, but young (considering I was under the impression that women in that position were around sixty years old). She was breathtaking to say the least! Soft features, her skin had an angelic glow to it and there was something in her eyes that trapped you in them...something you could not turn your gaze away from no matter how bad you wanted to.
“Mr. Priest, please sit down” She smiled
I nodded and sat on the chair in front of her desk
“Thank you for taking some time out of your busy schedule to speak with me, Mother Y/L/N-“
“Please, call me Y/N” Her sultry voice spoke
“Y/N” I tested the word on my lips and it sounded oddly pleasant
She smiled softly and...fuck she’s gorgeous! Her beauty was a painful and constant reminder of what you couldn’t have, couldn’t touch, couldn’t-“
“Mr. Priest?” She said softly
“Damian”
“Damian, would you like something to drink? Coffee, water, juice, tea perhaps?”
“No, I’m good. Thank you” I answered, while grabbing my notepad and a pen out of my backpack. Clearing my throat, I said “Can we get started with the pre-interview?”
“Of course” She smiled widely and reached for a cigarette pack on top of the table, which made me raise an eyebrow
“We all have our dirty little secrets, don’t we, Damian?” She asked, licking the cigarette filter before sucking it
*Am I going crazy?* I thought to myself
“Damian? Your first question is?” She giggled
“Ummm” I cleared my throat once again “Y/N, recently the convent was involved in a huge scandal involving drugs, prostitution, orgies and black masses. Would you like to clarify why an institution that’s deeply connected to the church is in the middle of something so profane?”
She grinned “God is in the most profane things, Damian. After all, the sinners are the ones who need Him the most, aren’t they?”
“I’m not sure if I follow-”
“You see” She took a long drag on her cigarette and walked towards me “God is our Lord and savior. He forgives us from our sins, grants us forgiveness to our most foul actions” She sat down on the chair beside me “If you steal from someone and repent; He’ll forgive you, kill someone and repent; He’ll save you, cheat on your wife with the hot, young next door neighbor and repent; He’ll brush it underneath the carpet and pretend it never happened” She shrugged “God doesn’t judge, Damian. He only forgives” She leaned forward on the arm of the chair, until she was uncomfortably close to me “So if the big boss himself doesn't judge anyone, then why should I?”
“And what does judgment have to do with drugs, orgies and sin?”
She smiled “How can God forgive you if you don’t sin, Damian?”
“And how can God forgive his so-called followers who incite others to sin, Y/N?”
“Incite others to sin?” She chuckled “Are you talking about the allegations, the donors or yourself?” She smirked
………………………………………………….......................
Since we’re so far from town I was informed that I would have to spend the night at the convent. They showed me my bedroom and it looked pretty fancy. King size bed, Egyptian sheets, expensive furniture. Everything was oddly normal, except for the weird dream I recalled having. I was at the convent, lost, calling for help because I somehow ended up locked in here. I was inside what looked like a large basement, the room was only lit by red lights, a faint smell of leather took over my nostrils as I heard someone moaning softly in my ear…a woman. And the weirdest thing was that I could’ve sworn I felt her breath against my ear. Needless to say I woke up with my dick as hard as a rock and had to spend a solid thirty minutes trying to get rid of a very painful boner, which did not leave me no matter how many times I came. Half hard and inside a convent...yeah, I’m definitely going to Hell!
“How did you sleep, Damian?” Was the first thing I was asked when I walked into the Mother Superior’s office in the morning. Something in her voice told me she knew exactly what I had done underneath the shower.
“Good”
“I bet you woke up feeling much better after a good night of rest, right?” She smiled devilishly and I just nodded
“Would you mind if we took a tour through the convent at some point?” I asked, quickly changing subjects
“Of course not! Let me know when you want one”
I nodded and began to ask my questions
“So, why do so many men keep coming and going from this convent? Seems like the place men shouldn’t be”
“The only men who come to the convent, Damian, are maintenance, the donors for the ‘thank you parties’ we host and now you” She smiled
“How do you get so many people to keep donating?”
“We don’t oblige anyone to do anything. People are still kind enough to see the work we do for those in need and they get touched by it. So God is the one who inspires them to donate, Damian. Not me”
“I’ve noticed a lot of fancy things here. Shouldn’t the money be going to something else?”
“The ‘fancy’ things you see are gifts from the donors. Things they felt in their hearts they should give us freely. We don’t buy things for the convent, apart from food. That’s one of the rules”
“Speaking of rules” I looked at her “Why are you smoking? Isn't that not allowed?”
“We don’t have rules against smoking here, Damian. The choice to do it or not is personal, but there are no rules for it. It’s not forbidden or a sin. Now, if you think nuns shouldn’t smoke, I suggest you pay a visit to the convents in Rome and give them a piece of your mind about their choices regarding health”
I chuckled at her comeback
“Why so cynical about our good intentions?” She licked her lips
“Because you don’t have any” I spat
“We live for helping those in need, Damian” She pointed towards my visible bulge
“Helping those in need, huh? And what do you get out of it?”
She walked towards me “Satisfaction in its purest form” She lifted one hand up and caressed my lower belly over my shirt “It’s incredible how much providing relief to others can trigger the biggest pleasure in our bodies...to see their eyes semi-closed in...relief is so rewarding to me”
I cleared my throat and shifted uncomfortably. “And just how needy do these people have to be?” I was speaking in financial terms of course
“Very needy” Her hand toyed with my jeans button “Some even have trouble sleeping due to their neediness, so you can see how a helping hand goes so well in this case...even the right mouth, you know to profess the Lord’s word”
“And just how many of these ‘charitable acts’ have you been involved with?” I felt my cock grow harder and harder
“Directly? Only when things get too hard, Damian” Her hand brushed against my hard bulge “That’s when I offer my help, so things can stop getting so hard and painful”
I gulped as I tried to shift away from her touch “So what, you just have all these other poor girls do your dirty work for you?” I try to keep my serious composure
“I’m not afraid of getting dirty, Damian. The girls do what they can, what they’re instructed to...but sometimes things get so hard that I have no other option but intervene” She pulled the fly of my jeans down “Then, once the seed of evil is finally spilled, things can go back to being soft again” She leaned in closer “Would you like a demonstration, Damian? I’m sure you have some kind of evil inside you that needs to be released” She asked with a sinister smile reaching her hand into the waistband of my boxer briefs
“I’m just here for work, Y/N, I have nothing to donate”
“Don’t worry about it. My girls will not be involved in this...it will be our little secret”
“I would like the tour now, please”
She smirked “Of course” and stepped away from me “This way” She went out the door as if nothing had happened
“Psycho bitch” I whispered to myself, as I pulled the fly of my jeans up and tied my hoodie around my waist to cover up the boner.
“This way we have the nuns bedrooms” She pointed towards a hallway “Kitchen, restrooms, archives, laundry room, storage for cleaning supplies, pantry” She explained each room, until we were outside “The patio, garden; where we cultivate flowers, fruits and vegetables, garage and the chapel is this way”
She walked towards a medium sized chapel in the middle of the garden, it looked like a regular chapel on the inside. It had an altar with a bible on it, a pulpit, a big cross, devotional statues of catholic saints, wooden benches and a confessional. Candles were lit up all over the place and everything looked normal. Scarily normal, until I noticed a few nuns who were sat on one of the benches staring at me with a weird look on their eyes
“Why are they looking at me like that?” I asked Y/N
“Like what?”
“Like, with...” I trailed off
“With desire?” She whispered in a mocking tone
I looked down at her speechless
“One could say that you’re a little too obsessed with the lust theme, Damian” She smiled “It’s all you can think about ever since you got here, dear. You should be careful” She licked her lips and pulled me by my hand towards her office again.
………………………........................................................
Later that night while I was trying to get some sleep, I began to hear some mumbling. Muffled voices kept saying something unintelligible and filling up the bedroom with mainly female voices. But one of the voices sounded too familiar to me...
I stood up from the bed and began to search in the room where those voices could be coming from, and as I almost gave up, I found it. A small hole of the size of a coin, in the concrete wall in front of my bed. Scooting closer to the wall, I knelt down and peeked through the hole, but weirdly enough, the room was pitch black. The mumbling started again and they soon became moans. Above all the moaning voices, one stood out to me. It was Y/N’s voice, she moaned softly while she said something I couldn’t quite understand. Her voice was filled with lust, her moans were pornographic and I could swear she was moaning my name. It both frightened and turned me on, so I did what any wise man would do. I returned to the bed, laid down and jerked off before falling into a deep slumber.
..................................................................................
“Wake up” Someone softly whispered in my ear
I quickly opened my eyes and my heart was beating at a frantic pace due to the fright.
A young girl was sitting down on my bed “Please, follow me” was all she said before standing up and leaving my room
I was so confused that I didn’t even bother to grab a t-shirt, so I just followed her down the hall barefoot and only with a pair of sweatpants on. Looking outside the hallway windows, I could see that the sky was still dark, which could only mean it was the late hours of morning.
She took me inside the laundry room and pressed a button underneath the folding clothes table. A door opened and a red light lit up the dark wooden stairs. I continued to follow her down the stairs, and we began to walk down a long hallway that looked more like a basement. The whole place had only red lights as the lighting source, so it took my eyes a while to get used to it.
“Where are you taking me?” I asked, but only received silence as a response
We walked for what felt like ten minutes until we reached a black wooden door with an iron door knocker. She knocked on the door four times and left.
“Is this a prank?” I asked myself, after five minutes of standing there alone. Suddenly the door opened, but I couldn’t see anything other than darkness ahead
“Hello?” I called from the doorway, but no one answered back
The thing that made me such a great reporter was my utter curiosity, and even with all my senses screaming ‘don’t go in there!’ I decided to listen to my curious side instead, and went into the room. As soon as I stepped a foot inside, the door behind me closed shut.
The room was pitch black and I stumbled across a few items. I placed my hand on top of what felt like a table so I could try to guide myself through the room, at least back to the door again so I could leave. When suddenly I felt several pairs of soft hands on my torso pulling me back.
“What the fuck?” I gasped in shock
But before I could make a move, my wrists and ankles were tied to a wooden surface and a red light turned on in the room
Five nuns were in front of me, staring silently at my body
“Leave” Someone said from behind me, and the nuns obeyed and left
“I would be lying if I said you weren’t a beautiful sight” Y/N said, and and walked in front of me
“You psycho bitch” I growled and pulled at the restraints “Let me go!”
She smiled “Oh Damian...You don’t want that!” Her nails softly scratched my lower belly “And neither do I”
“You’re sick! Let me go, you fucking-“
“Na ah” She slapped me across the face “I’m done playing these pretending games” She lit up a cigarette “Pretend you didn’t jerk off to my moans, pretending you don’t want to fuck me...that gets tiring” She dipped her hand inside my sweatpants and found my semi hard bulge “You’ve wanted to fuck me ever since you laid eyes on me” She giggled and I licked my dry lips
“Those sinful, filthy, thoughts you’ve had, Damian” She closed her fist around my erection “You wanted to know what we do here, right? We purge that demon out of you” And scooted closer until her lips brushed against my own with every word she spoke
“We send him away, so he can’t bother you anymore” She freed my cock from my pants and began to pump her hand up and down “We release you from the seed of evil”
“What the fuck are you talking about?” I panted
Y/N knelt down in front of me and darted her tongue out, licking my slit “Give me the seed of evil, Damian” and gave an open mouth kiss on my tip “Feed me with it” Licked the underside of my shaft “Release yourself from what’s been bothering you ever since you got here” Darting her tongue out “Use me to purify your soul” And opened her mouth wider.
At such a sight I had no other option but to buck my hips forward…
And chase for my cleansing
If you’re comfortable with it, please let me know your thoughts on this? Feedbacks are always appreciated 🥰😘
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utterlyinevitable · 3 years
Note
Hey would you be able to write a follow on fic from your hurricane series where Mc gives in and gives Ethan a lap dance infront of her friends? ☺️
Hurricane (Part 6): Alternate Scene
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Pairing: Dr. Ethan Ramsey x F!MC (Dr. Rebecca Lao) Rating: M to be safe Warning: lap dance and alcohol and lewd thoughts (kinda)  Summary: A hurricane is falling over Boston. Edenbrook has been evacuated and some very different doctor’s end up seeking shelter together.  
a/n: For @panda9584 💞
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As the day went on, the trio of residents progressively got more and more inebriated by the hour. Sienna ended up running around the couch as many times as she could in 15 seconds, Elijah was dared to make a cocktail with his eyes closed, and Becca refused to do a dare.
Becca picked a card for her turn.
“Dare.” She announced, a sweat breaking on her forehead in anticipation.
Sienna let out a drunk giggle. “I dare you to go give Ethan a lap dance.”
Ethan’s head perked out of his book at his name in conjunction with the word “lap dance”;
“What are you doing?”
“Truth or Dare,” Sienna informed through her giggle. “Ethan, come play!”
The man pushing forty was quick to repudiate, “Absolutely not. I’m not a child.”
“Suit yourself, fun police.”  
“Go play, son. I’m going to make some calls.” Naveen chuckled with a wink. He had spent the whole day watching his residents’ charades, now it was time to go to work and let them enjoy the rare time together. Naveen also hoped his departure would give Ethan the space to lighten up.
Taking the hint his oldest friend so graciously smacked him with, Ethan stood and moved to sit closer to the group of friends.  
“I’m not playing,” he huffed as he perched on the cold cushion closest to Becca.
Everyone ignored him.
Elijah brought back the attention to Becca, “Dance or chug, Bec?”
She briefly glanced over her shoulder at Ethan. His features were his signature stoic, yet she could see the glimmer of playfulness hiding within the depths of his irises.
Turning back to her friends, she took a long, dramatic breath. Eventually she proclaimed, “Oh, fuck it!”
Ethan’s eyes went wide and he instinctively leaned back into the cushions. As swiftly as possible, he mentally prepared himself for what was about to happen, what her friends were about to witness. He told himself he had to keep his hands put. Now was not the time to get excited. But, man, he can’t wait to have her so close. The thought itself had his eyes shutting with pleasure. Ethan unfolded his hands from where they hung in the space between his legs and gingerly placed his palms against the paisley cushion.  
She eyed her friends, a look Ethan couldn’t see but could feel - the icy daggers soaring their way. 
Then she stood, turned towards him with the most impassive of expressions. He couldn’t read her mind nor her features in the dim fireside lighting. Somehow her uncertainty had his leg jittering with wanton anticipation. 
A tight smirk rested on Ethan’s lips, so smug and only for her. He was challenging her. And Becca was determined to prove champion.
In the background Sienna and Elijah were huddled over the former’s phone. “No - that one. It has to be.” 
A second later Pony started to play.
Becca freed her hair, letting the chestnut locks cascade down her shoulders. Running a hand to mess it up more - unwittingly making sure the signature scent of her shampoo reached his nostrils even from this distance. 
Standing in front of him she started to sway her hips to the music. One step, and she’s closer. Another, and her legs are an inch from his. Third step, and she’s within reach, looming over him and his heart is starting to race. He knows there’s at least two other people in this room, but he doesn’t care. The room isn’t lit all that well and anyway all he can see - all he can feel surrounding him and gripping at his being - is her. She doesn’t need to touch him to have him unraveling. 
Another half step and Becca’s nudging his legs open with her knee to stand perfectly in between them. She’s still dancing - swaying, rather - in small, reserved motions. Ethan’s midnight eyes are on her intently - roving from her face, to her hips, trailing back up to her hands that he knows can cause so much damage with one simple touch. He’s watching her hands roam her torso and she moves so close - till her legs are pressed firmly against the sofa. Her fingers playing with the hem of her top, giving him just the slightest of glimpses at the pale skin beneath before its gone all too soon.  
Ethan swallows past the lump in his throat. 
The music picks up. So she did as well; throwing one leg over his, her knees resting on the couch. Becca was hovering over his lap now and Ethan could smell the perfume she wears as she dips with the music, her inner hips all but meeting his thigh. Oh how he wished it did. She’s not touching him and it’s killing him -- Becca hasn’t said a word to him since earlier, either. Now here she was, in one of the places she would tell him she loves most, ignoring the pull of inevitability between them. 
Her knee so close to his hand he dared to creep closer - dared to break the cardinal rule of things like this. His thumb and forefinger brushing at the fabric at her knee. 
Becca hadn’t looked him in the eyes since the challenge began. Purposefully, he’s sure. His eyes followed her hands as they drew nonsensical patterns, hooded in embarrassment. For a fraction his mind jumps to the strokes of the last work of art she mapped on the canvas of his back. 
He felt his jeans become uncomfortably tight. 
She dipped her hips again like she knows what lays beneath - the sweet bit of torture she could inflict by just grazing his lap. Her torso rolling forwards with the movement, and now he can smell the peony and apple soap she uses. Her eyes are closed and she’s just moving - moving and keeping her distance. 
And if there was a single saint in hell Ethan begins to call on them all. How long left? Not long enough, that’s for sure. 
Ethan dared some more, unwritten rules be damned. His hand gingerly trailed up the back of her calf, around to the front of her knee and up her thigh. Stopping just before reaching her hip as she rolled into the three inches of space between their laps. He took a risk. And if she didn’t like it she didn’t give any inclination but a turn of her head. He could see the faint love bite he left last night at the base of her neck - so faint no one but the two of them would know it’s a bruise of passion.  
Both her knees found their way to the cushion and now Becca was fully on top of him. So many times she’s been like this. It took everything in Ethan not to lift her into his arms and carry her upstairs that second. It also took a lot of self control not to audibly groan - her friends didn’t need to bear witness to his primitive side. 
The strength she used to keep herself upright dwindled away with the new closeness. One hand on his chest, the other digging into the top of the cushion behind his back, his hands still anchored on her thighs. Ethan could hear the lowering beats of the music over the thumping in his ears. Could feel her labored breaths passing across his cheeks. 
His thumbs began rubbing circles at her hips. Becca moves back - as upright as she can get. Her hand running through her hair and over her face and Ethan just wants her to look at him. So he doesn’t what you aren’t supposed to do - he trails a hand up her body and cups her cheek. The electricity between them vibrates. Ignites into flames when her entire being leans into him. Runs rampant as his fingers tangle in her hair. His eyes close as Ethan pulls her to him, lips parted and intent on satiating this spurring in his abdomen. 
And just when they should have collided his eyes dart open. Becca’s gone. Not within reach anymore. He chances a glance to where her friends must still be loitering. 
They’re there. Like they haven’t moved.
So is Becca.  
The only move she made was lifting the glass to her lips. And it dawns on him...
Becca chose to chug.
It was all just a daydream of a rakish man. 
And Ethan couldn’t believe he was more disappointed than relieved.
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a/n: potentially garbage? yeah. sensuality isn't my strong suit, i prefer making people’s hearts hurt 😅
@openheartfanfics  @choicesficwriterscreations
Perma:
@lucy-268  @thegreentwin  @queencarb  @danijimenezv  @starrystarrytrouble   @terrm9 @interobanginyourmom @maurine07  @mercury84choices  @schnitzelbutterfingers  @the-pale-goddess @whimsicallywayward15  @mvalentine  @mm2305 @rookie-ramsey @drariellevalentine   @withbeautyandrage  @forallthatitsworth   @stateofgracious  @missmiimiie  @uneravine   @iemcpbchoices  @sophxwithers @therookie @quixoticdreamer16 @lsvdw-blog @reputaytion-xiii 
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Ethan:
@udishaman  @binny1985  @honeyandsunfl0wers @wingedhairstylemusicweasel @ohchoices  @dulceghernandez @blossomanarchy  @stygianflood  @caseyvalentineramsey @openheartthot @senseofduties  @tsrookie  @kalogh @aworldoffandoms  @takemyopenheart  @casey-v @ethanramseylover @a-crepusculo @randomperson111  @lilypills @anntoldst0ries @nix-grey  @aishaaaaaaah @estellaelysian @mysticaurathings @mayarambles
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the-midnight-feline · 3 years
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¤¸¸.•´¯`•¸¸.•..>> So this piece is actually part of the Piliin mo ang Pilipinas Collab event hosted by @lumpiang-toge, you guys should seriously check this out since the works posted there are such good reads ❤️️<<..•.¸¸•´¯`•.¸¸¤
this is the first time i've joined a collab, (ngl i thought i was waaay in over my head lol) i'd like to thank a friend of mine, Dylan, (won't tag his blog just cause, loves you for reading it !) thanks so much for the encouraging words ❤️ and of course Mama Rae (@hq-girl-next-door) for the advice on the banner**❤️
**For the banner I did, I took the image from pinterest, if you guys know who the artist is, please let me know so I could properly give credit to them :)
Tags/TW: Mutual pinning-ish, friends to lovers, fluff to angst, Cheating, swearing (I think theres one or two in there)
(A/N: Please don't get too confused /-\, the italic parts is you recollecting the past, it comes and goes (。♡‿♡。))
WC: 3.8k ;-; didn't know it get that long
Pairings: Tendou Satori x fem!Reader
Summary: It all started with a simple crush, you wouldn't have guessed that it'll be more than that, It was a dream come true to loved and be loved by the person you loved, but not all dreams end good, some end as a nightmare.
“You like the Guess Monster, like THE Guess Monster?!?!” your friends shouted in unison, looking at them frantically as you’re in the gym watching the guys warm up for a practice match and the way they shouted had the sounds of balls hitting the floor just below where your group sat, you willed yourself to look at the who were the people below you guys trying repress the blush you feel creeping on your cheeks, swallowing that lump on your throat as you peaked just a little over the ledge and saw his red hair. Internally cussing out your so-called friends, you tired to act like you calm and collected as he was looking up at the bleachers, maybe trying to guess which one in your group, who was also looking over at whoever heard them, liked him, shaking his head, chuckling toward Ushijima and Semi who was already making their way to the court to get this warm up started.
A single tear began rolling down your cheek as you remembered how it all began, your friends’ sudden outburst in the gym gave you the opportunity to talk to the guy you’ve been crushing on when you first saw him in the opening ceremony just something about him drew you to him and you were adamant on getting to, at the least, know him. Sitting on the floor of your shared bedroom, opening the memory box you and your husband made a few months after you started dating.
Semi knew your friend, he actually liked her and from that outburst of theirs at the gym, he 89immediately thought of a way to hit two birds with one stone. “hey, y/f/n, I heard you guys at the bleachers, sooo” scratching he neck out of shyness “which of your friends like our Tendou? Maybe we could setup a date or something?" He really liked your friend and would honestly do anything to get her on a date, she pointed to you, the quiet in of the group, usually the source of rationality and guidance, the one that acts like the mediator of the group. You really always kept to yourself, didn’t really want to attract attention towards yourself. Semi was skeptical at first, you the quiet, shy girl of the class liked that loud ass friend of his? Maybe y/f/n was pulling his leg, she can’t be serious.
A bitter laugh escapes your lips as the memory of your first date comes crashing on you as see the pressed flower from the little hole in the wall café near the school, Semi was the one that found that café and planned every detail of the date.
As you and your friend were walking towards the café Semi told her about, you were itching to just keep hitting your friends back “why the hell did you fucking agree to this?!!” you hissed at your friend, you were practically shooting daggers at her for saying yes on your behalf and you didn’t even know what she agreed to but she told you to get dolled up, silly you, thinking that it’ll be just a girls day out, but peering over her shoulder as your guys walk out of the dorm, you see her texting Semi, thinking maybe it was him asking for notes since they were in the same class. She led you to this small café and you guys sat at a corner booth, making you sit inside by the wall, you really thought nothing of it, until you saw that distinctive red hair bounding towards your booth. Your palms got a tad sweaty, nerves getting the best of you, a million thoughts racing in your mind that you didn’t notice that the Tendou Satori was there taking the seat opposite of you in the booth, the ever infectious smile directed towards you and you alone. Seeing as you and Satori were basically having a silent conversation with just your smiles, Semi and your friend made a discreet exit and left you two be. Little did you know, he often saw you around, he knows you like shounen jump as much as he does since he sees you go to the store he usually goes to, he knows what snacks you liked since he usually goes out at the middle of the night to get some snacks of his own at the convenience store around the corner. He sees you in the library with your nose buried in some book when he follows Semi there just to annoy him. Tendou didn’t tell anybody about the girl he liked from afar, he knew he’d scare you off, no one wanted to date a Monster, or that’s what he thought.
Looking back, that impromptu date was what started the relationship with Satori, a soft sob escapes your lips as tears gently fall on the first picture you have together, he suddenly rang you up and asked you to go to the mall with him. In the picture, he had his arm wrapped around your shoulder while you were hugging his waist tightly, seemingly scared that being with him was a dream you don’t want to wake up from.
Getting out of the shower, you hear your phone ring from under your pillow, confused as to who might that be since it was an unknown number calling you, curious you answered it. “hey y/n! I know it’s kinda out of the blue but, you wanna go to the mall with me?” shock was evident in your body, it was Tendou! Your thoughts was scrambling, you know you didn’t get a chance to give him your number before you guys parted ways on your first meeting since Coach Washijo made Ushijima contact both guys for a weekend practice. You knew the coach was a hot head and would make anymore run 50 laps if they were late and that was a few weeks ago, a worried Tendou called out to you again “uh…y/n? If you have other plans I totally under-“ blinking back to the present “I’d love to go! Lemme get ready and I’ll meet you down” you cut him off midsentence hearing a small chuckle at the other line “don’t make me wait too long ok?” he said in a teasing tone which made you giggle on the line “yes, yes Satori, I’ll hang up so I could get ready ok? See you!” it took every ounce of self-control to not shriek the whole conversation, once he hung up you were practically jumping on your bed out of pure joy, but then you remembered that he’ll be waiting, you quickly snapped out of it and looked through your dresser for a decent outfit for going out with Tendou, you quickly settled with a simple get up of a long sleeved shirt and pants with some sneakers on, you excitedly exited your room, to meet up with Tendou, hoping you haven’t made him wait too long, turning the last corner you see him outside your dorm, almost wearing the same thing as you, even the color of your shoes match, biting your lip to stop a stupid smile from taking over you walk up behind him, gently poking his side, his sudden jump made you giggle as he took in all of you, a smile makes its way on his lips and eyes as he himself lets out a chuckle. “y/n? Are you copying me?” shaking your head, letting a small laugh out “Satori, please you’re the one copying me here” he just shook his out of amusement when he saw the glint of teasing in your eyes before he offended his arm to you like a gentleman would, the small action made you faint blush.
You two spent the day just walking around the mall, just browsing from store to store, having just a blast at all the random comments he makes, the last stop you guys make was the arcade, you guys played all sorts of games, air hockey, tried your luck at a pachinko machine and Tendou even tried the basketball game, which he surprisingly good at that he won a lot of tickets getting you a small rubiks cube, but near the back of the arcade something caught your eye, a purikura, Tendou saw where your eyes went and with a small smile he took your hand and walked towards the machine, and ushered you in the booth, he felt at comfortable around you, he would’ve never guessed that you were a crack head like, random outbursts of ideas and thoughts spouted from you made him laugh as you spent time together. He quickly wrapped an arm around your shoulder, pulling you close to him, a flash went off, that was the first shot, with the blush creeping on your cheeks you hid your face under your hair and hugged him another flash went off, that was the second shot, he tipped you head up, making you look at him, his infectious smile directed at you as another flash went off, and the last shot was of him kissing your forehead. You were left speechless after that whole scenario, seemingly in a dazed as he guided you out and grab the prints of the photos. That’s how you guys ended the date, he held your hand in his all the way back to the dorms, placing a chaste kiss on your cheek as you parted ways.
Rummaging further through the memory box, you see all the mementos you both kept from your dates, a few fallen leaves, a couple of pretty rocks, stickers, napkins, flowers, pictures, the cork from the bottle of champagne you drank at your wedding. More tears fell from your eyes as you dug through all the stuff in the box, who knew you both collected a lot of things in just a couple of years. What made you sob so hard was the acceptance letters you both got when you were selected as the few students for the incoming year.
A few months before graduation, you both got accepted into a culinary school in Tokyo, you were ecstatic as this means you and Tendou could get a place together since your parents already gave you two a small amount to get a place near the school so you two could still practice and create new dishes together, it was really no surprise to your friends or the whole volleyball team that you two would get into culinary school, you’ve always had a thing for cooking, you’d often come their practices with some bento boxes for all of the guys so they don’t have to go out and spend for food, on the weekends, the kitchen was his domain he’d let you watch him bake and oftentimes let you help him out. It’s often that the whole group get together during the weekends, you cooking for them while Tendou makes that dessert. For some reason, they got jealous of how your relationship started, it was as if all the pieces just fell into place at the right time, you two together just seemed right like you two were always suppose to be with each other. There’s always been a carefree air around him, it calmed you down so much that it helped you be more open or that’s how you saw it. You were the opposite of him always worrying, always, over thinking, being overly critical of your actions and how you overwhelmed with everything so you turned to anything that’ll help you divert your mind but once he was in your life it just got easier. He voice would immediately calm the voices spewing negative thoughts I had your head.
Looking around your room, you see pictures of you together, your graduation picture, the picture of you guys on the front of the school, the picture of your guys graduating culinary school, a photo of you two at the restaurant where you two both apprenticed and next to that was the candid shot of his proposal there, a mix of joy and hurt shoot through you as you the memory come rushing back to you.
The way he sheepishly confessed that he asked the manager if he could do his proposal there and invite your family and friends for that surprise. “Hey y/n, come with me, a customer just complained about the sauce you made being too salty, I’m not taking blame for that!” an angry chef came shouting at you, shocked and anxiousness dunning through you, you timidly follow behind him, thinking how you could screw up a simple sauce like that, your thoughts were everywhere, but once you stepped outside the kitchen you noted that the dining area was dimmer then usual, but maybe that’s because you’re used to the bright lights of the kitchen, you hear a soft melody playing, it’s one of your favourite songs ‘I Choose' you’ve always related that song to your relationship. On the far wall you see photos of you together, looking around you see familiar faces, his and your parents, your friends, the Shiratorizawa boys were there even the coach came!
The euphoria you felt from having everyone who had been part of your relationship through the ups and downs just had you in tears, your head was fuzzy with the mix of a dozen emotions swirling in you, through a blur of tears you see him kneeling in front of you, he let out a huff of breath to calm his nerves before asking you the question “y/n, my love, my baby, my better half, my paradise. You’ve stuck by my side through my highs and lows, loved me unconditionally, took care of me whenever I got sick, urged me to follow my dreams, guided me into being a better guy, especially with my chocolate making you supported my dreams like no other can, you, you made my world complete, you made me feel things I haven’t felt in a long time, you gave me your heart to cherish and protect. You made my life whole” the words flowed out of his mouth so freely, every word making more tears come out of you, every word so heartfelt, with shakey hands we presented you a pear cut yellow emerald ring “My Paradise, would you do me the honor of being my paradise for eternity?” no words could express how happy you were nodding your head, trying to stop happy tears from falling a hushed ‘yes’ slips past you lips as he stands to slip the ring on your left hand, pulling you in for a tight hug, whispering endless I love you’s and thank you in your ears as the people around you cheered for the newly engaged couple.
Biting back another sob, you feel fresh tears streaming down your cheeks as your eyes land on your wedding photo above the bed, he loved you enough to marry you, he was yours and you were his, you can’t help but stare at the framed photo, he had that infectious smile of his that made you fall from him the day you saw him. He has you up in his arms as your arms were wrapped around his neck, pecking a sweet kiss on his cheek. You asked him many times if he’d like to blowup another photo from your wedding, he simply shook his head and wrapped you up in his arms “you’re perfect in any picture of us, but in that one you look like the most perfect human being in existence and I’m just lucky to have you in my life” you basked in his love and affection on those simple words pulling him closer and burying you face on his chest, inhaling his sweet scent “I’m lucky to have you Tori, lucky to be called your wife” placing a chaste kiss on his chest as you look up to him with love-struck eyes. This was it you guys moved countries after your wedding to France since Tendou was offered a job at a famous pâtisserie there, all you wanted was your husband happy, wherever you guys may be.
You never really cared where you two were, as long as you were together, you could get lessons on the French cuisine as Tendou works, that was the plan before you guys flew out. You worked hard to learn the basics, you’d often have Tendou taste test all your creations and you’ll you the same for him since he likes to experiment with different flavor combinations, things were great the first few months of moving cross countries, you enrolled in a cooking classes there to build up your repertoire and after a few weeks of learning a few new techniques you've decided to look around for places you could work at just to keep your body busy again. You've decorated the apartment the way you liked it and how you think Tendou would like it, just adding different odds and ends giving it a familiar vibe. This place was your starting ground.
When you got a job at the nearby bistro, Tendou didn’t really mind it, since he’d often come home a bit later then usual saying something along the lines of making things in the experiment lab with the other chocolatiers at the shop to have something new for the upcoming season, in turn you thought nothing of it since you do work nights after getting a gig in a restaurant in town as well, it also means you could still have time to make his dinner and keep it warm for when he gets home. You two actually got into an argument when you got that gig since Tendou was adamant about keeping you in the apartment after the morning shift at the bistro so you don’t work yourself too hard, he wanted to start thinking about getting a kitten to keep you company when he’s out working but you argued back that you didn’t wanna feel like mooching off of him even though he said it was fine, he loved coming home to a warm meal that you made with love and gets more time to spend with you, but he did cave in after a few bats of your eyelashes.
It was perfect, you both were doing what you were passionate about, you two scheduled your offs near each other’s so one could take care of each other after a long day. But there was this weird feeling creeping in you but you simply don’t know why it was there, you and Tendou always kept communication open since you two do work different shifts and that itself puts a strain in the relationship but you two made it work. You loved him. So you would really sacrifice anything for him, he had have a rough childhood, he was bullied cause he looked different, acted different, but he wasn’t like that for you, he never was, even though he had a wicked sense for things which really surprised you, you can’t even hide a gift from him cause he knew what you’d get him or more likely sense what you’ll give him.
You don’t tell him that you swapped shifts with someone so you technically have a day off so you decided to drop by the pâtisserie where Tendou worked with some home made Pan Bagnat since it was nearing lunch, as you were close to the shop you saw his figure near the window placing new confections on display, but something made you stop, another person, a female chocolatier, was hugging him from behind and not in a friendly way, there was familiarity to it, it looked as if she’s been hugging him for so long, like she’s always hugged him, you didn’t notice that you’ve dropped the basket you were holding on the sidewalk, the glass bottle shattering on impact, the sangria spilling on the pavement, the sandwich you made, making a mess, the fruits you packed rolling in every direction. People around gasped at the scene, some tried to help in picking up the fruits that escaped, your mind in thought again, maybe you just interpreted it wrongly they’re just so so close, like a brother and sister kinda way, since they both work in the shop, you simply jumped to conclusions too fast, those thought completely vanished as the next sight you saw.
She kissed him. SHE KISSED HIM!! Your mind played that in your head like it was a song played on a loop. That was what made your heart break, that was the tipping point, he didn’t push her away, it was the opposite, he pulled her closer, the way he held her mirrored how he would hold you when he came home from work, people around you were asking you things trying to snap you out of your trance but you paid no mind to them, your legs moving on their own.
It was as if you were on autopilot, you got home, your mind racing with so many thoughts, how long had that been going on? Is she why he’d come home later than usual, is she the reason he had woken up earlier to get to work everyday? Did he spend his days off with her when you suddenly get shifts? Walking into your apartment, you didn’t know what to think, how to feel, how to make sense of things more questions come into your mind. Does he bring her here? Did they do anything sexual in the place you called home? What places were safe? Did she please him better than I did? You walked into your bedroom where the memory box laid in the middle of bed. It was your first wedding anniversary, did he really forget? Your anniversary was engraved on your wedding rings with your initials on it.
A scream of agony escaped your lips as everywhere you looked at it was all you and him the very place you thought was the safest of all was not. It's tainted with infidelity, your heart broke even more as you took the box from the bed with shaking hands contemplating on whether to open the box or not, he loved you with every part of him didn’t he? You were enough weren’t you? You made sure he was satisfied right? You gave him all the love you could and even more right? Didn’t he promise you that he’d protect your heart? You're still his paradise right? He loves you right?
Maybe opening the box, and finding something that you both placed in there would make him rethink his choices right? With broken sobs and uneven breathing, your fingers shaking as you pulled the pretty red ribbon that held the lid shut, looking at all the things that you both collected that reminded you both that you loved each other you broke even more. Every one of them held the promise of love, of fidelity, of trust. But now, a part of you is doubting every word that passed his lips, every kiss that landed on your skin made you feel dirty, every I love you's he uttered seems like a lie. You didn’t want to feel that way, you love him with every part of your being, you’re THE Mrs. Satori Tendou, no one else but you had that title, just you, it was only you right? You were his paradise for eternity right? Right?
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I hope you guys liked this, I actually really liked working on this one(played my brokenhearts plays it nonstop for it) , but I do have another one coming so...yeah!
Song inspiration :Anong Nangyari Sa Ating Dalawa by Aiza Seguerra
Song used in the proposal I Choose by Alessia Cara
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haikyuucute · 4 years
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Hi!! 🌼 Anon here! Could I please request an angst /smut scenario with iwizumi on which his S/o is as focused in her sport (she is into karate) as he is in volley so when both national championships comming spendimg time together becomes almost impossible and therefore they are a little bit irritable and end Up having an ansty fight about the time they dedicate to sport and if they should continúe together that blows Up into a savage sex session the whole night Hope that its possible thanks!😊
Warning: Smut
From the beginning the two of you always knew how your respective sports were important to each other— that passion was even what drew you two to each other in the first place
But unfortunately it’s also what drove you two apart
Both of you had important tournaments coming up and with all the late nights the two of you spent at school, it made it difficult for anything to really happen
For a while Iwaizumi would wait for you after practice so he could walk you home and vice versa, and the two of you would try to walk to school together as well
And with lunch periods the only time you two got to be with each other was then and before and after school
It was a bit of a blow, since the two of you would always go over to each other’s houses or go out on dates quite often before both your schedules got too busy
But the both of you were optimistic and made it work to the best of your abilities
Despite your optimism you both could feel the tension that lingered in not getting to be with each other as much as you both wanted
That tension began to steadily rise when you suddenly decided to stay later and later after practice, meaning Iwaizumi had to start going home alone
Next was when morning practice had picked up for the volleyball club, so you started walking to school by yourself
And then during lunch, the one time of the day now that you both got to spend time together, your teams started pulling the two of you out of class for extra practices
So now, the most you two could really do was call, text, and look forward to those brief stolen moments during the school day
Of course this made questions arise
And the one that made you sick to your stomach was if dating him was even worth it at this point
Tensions were at an all time high
You were frustrated with each other and yourselves for not making a better effort in your relationship
You both snapped more at your teammates and focused even harder on your sports to get your frustrations out
And then Sejoh lost against Karasuno but your team still had a few matches left
So now as Iwaizumi wasn’t as occupied but you still were, things just got worse from there
Arguments here and there started arising as he would try and get you to stop overworking yourself and spend some time with you, but you’d refuse
Iwaizumi would stare at your empty seat during lunch
Your morning walks to school resumed but they were filled with stiff conversation
And one night the tension suddenly became too much and you both snapped
You had stayed late by yourself in one of the school’s gyms when Iwaizumi had tried to stop you so he could walk you home and prevent you from overworking yourself
But you refused and before you knew it the two of you were screaming back and forth at each other
Iwaizumi accused you of not taking the relationship seriously and you weren’t putting in an effort
You accused him of the same because the only difference now was that he wasn’t busy with his practices as well
Somehow the argument had escalated to where you started making claims you didn’t truly believe
”If we can’t make this work, then maybe we’d be better off if we just broke up!”
The gym fell completely silent after the exclamation as Iwaizumi registered your words until he finally spoke
“You want to breakup?”
His voice was so low and steady, that it was kind of scary
”I-I don’t—“ “Like hell I’m letting you break up with me over this”
His words were followed by him pulling you into a bruising kiss and dragging you into the girls locker room
Iwaizumi Hajime was never one to hold back when it came to anything he was passionate about.
And if he needed to show you just how passionate he was about yours and his relationship, then that was what he was going to do.
He had your back pressed against a set of lockers, one leg hooked over his arm as he kept you spread open for him, your other foot pressed to the ground, but it did little to hold you up because if it wasn’t for Iwaizumi you definitely would’ve fallen.
He had set a brutal pace as he fucked into you, every thrust making your body jolt and you could barely form a coherent word, instead broken cries and moans of his name falling past your lips.
And it felt so fucking good— it had been so long since you were last with Iwaizumi like this, you could barely remember the last time the two of you even shared a real kiss instead of quick little pecks.
You held onto him so tightly, nails biting into his skin as he whispered dirty words in your ear— reminders that you were his, trying to knock some sense into you and make you never think for another moment that you two should break up.
”Mine,” he practically growled against your neck, kissing and biting the flesh, before dragging his lips to your ear, “‘M not losing you over a fucking sport,” he grunted, “I don’t care how many times I have to fuck it into you.”
”Hajime,” you gasped out, pressing your forehead against his shoulder. A wave of emotions came crashing over you— the fact that you were so ready to break up with him over this frightened you. Dating each other wouldn’t be easy with how busy you two usually were, but you hated that you were so ready to give up.
He moved his arm that was caging you in on one side and snaked his hand between your bodies, fingers quickly finding your clit and making you cry out for him.
”Fuck— c’mon princess, what is it?”
Your fingers dug harder into his skin, “Want you Hajime,” you managed to choke out.
”Yeah? Good, ‘cause I’m not letting you go.”
Your orgasm suddenly crashed over you, making Iwaizumi groan as you squeezed his cock. He continued to fuck you through your orgasm, prolonging it for as long as he could before his own release washed over him as he muttered curses and your name over and over again in your ear.
Once the two of you were nothing but breathless messes, he had dropped your leg. But what he said next had your heart hammering against your rib cage more than it already was.
”I’m sneaking you into my place tonight. This is far from over, by the end of the night I’ll make sure that breaking up is the last thing on your mind.”
Taglist
@yams046 @thirsthourdemon @basicallyberry @badboysdoitbetter2 @mizuchan24-blog @unlikelytigerqueen @savemesteeb @coursingriver
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hellreads · 3 years
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Hello, I just stumble on your blog. Seeing a comment from Wrienne which I also read on AO3, I wanted to ask if you also have AO3 recs..?
hi there darling, of course, I have some recs for you! since you didn’t ask for anything specific let me just share a few faves that you could only read/access on ao3 (I would also recommend you check my ficshelfs and use the ao3 filter to find stories exclusively posted there + i’ll still include wrienne’s works for other readers :3 ) | 🍒
OT7/MULTIPLE MEMBERS
❥ Right of Way by fringesofsanity ➴ Infidelity!AU | Jungkook x Reader x Jimin | Series ➴ In theory, things were simple: your best friend was Jungkook’s girlfriend while your boyfriend, Jimin, was Jungkook’s best friend. In reality, things weren’t always that simple. And mutually exclusive.
❥ The Hills by minlouvre ➴ Vacation/Exes!AU | Yoongi x Reader x Hoseok | Series ➴ A ski trip with old friends sounds like a fun time, right?
when your ex-boyfriend (who you hate but somehow always end up in bed with) and your stepbrother (who you are harboring not-so-secret feelings for) tag along at the last minute, you have a feeling it won’t be an uneventful weekend.
but fun? debatable. that remains to be seen. ❥ A Hundred Percent Human by Wrienne ➴ Hybrid!AU | OT7 x Reader | Series ➴ In which you (reader) are forced to take care of seven hybrids in a twist of fate.
After your estranged mother passes away, you're left with an unwanted will and the heavy burden of responsibility. Although you're desperate not to stray from the familiar path you thought was laid out in front of you with a fully human boyfriend who loves you more than anything, your life is thrown upside down once more after another unfortunate incident (that may or may not have to do with said boyfriend) occurs.
Drunk and down on life, you finally decide to deal with the house and the unsavory business your mother left behind. However, to your shock, you find that seven very different hybrids are included with both the house - and the business. Seven hybrids you never even met before - even less agreed to take care of.
❥ Dead Leaves by Wrienne ➴ Detective/Exes!AU | Yoongi x Reader x Jimin | Series ➴ In which you (reader) are a homicide detective about to face the biggest hurdle both of your career and life.
Married to probably the kindest but most boring man you’ve ever met and living in a town where nothing ever seems to happen means life for you is dull. Dull enough to drive you crazy with boredom and dissatisfaction. However, life changes abruptly when your old boss retires and a new man takes his place - a man you used to love (and sleep very regularly with) more than a decade ago. Especially when your husband comes home smelling of perfume, you’re unable to resist your more carnal urges and dead women start showing up across the city with unnerving frequency. ❥ See Both Sides Like Chanel by minlouvre ➴ FWB/Rich Kids!AU | Namjoon x Reader x Hoseok | One-Shot ➴ You, Namjoon, and Hoseok are inseparable. 
Three best friends that grew up together since you were all in diapers.But lately, Namjoon has been drifting away…
So on his birthday, you and Hoseok remind him just how inseparable the three of you really are.
⤷ or alternatively: a little less twenty-one candles, a little more “touch me”
❥ Love Is A Dog From Hell by yourlocalhoney ➴ FWB/Lovers!AU | Yoongi x Reader x Jungkook | Series ➴ You and Yoongi agreed on being good friends, co-workers, and friends who help each other out under the sheets. What you never agreed on was to catch feelings for each other.
Enter, accidental feelings.
Enter, Jeon Jungkook.
❥ The Uncanny by Sinsirella ➴ Arranged Marriage!AU | Jungkook x Reader x Seokjin x Jimin | Series ➴ (Y/N) is a young girl whose Life turns upside down. One day her mother surprises her with news of her arranged husband, forcing her into her new chaotic lifestyle. Join her journey and experience her new life through her eyes. Will she get along with her husband? Or someone else? What are they hiding? ❥ Seven Deadly Sins by mintedmango ➴ Hell!AU | OT7 x Reader | Series ➴ You stood suddenly, chair being pushed away by the backs of your legs, the rest of the sins standing with you as you looked around in panic. All except Sloth who was out cold in the corner.
“Oh, little pet, indeed, I am still hungry.”
❥ Walk Through The Fire by shellflower ➴ Supernatural!AU | Taehyung x Reader x Jungkook | Series ➴ In a world of supernatural beings, a normal human like yourself always found attraction and wonder towards these creatures. It was your kind heart that led you to become a doctor to treat such people. And it was your kind heart that led you into the arms of a young Alpha wolf who will accidentally force you down a path you were never meant to follow... ❥ Into Temptation by coconutty  ➴ Demon!AU | Taehyung x Reader x Jungkook | Two-Shot ➴ It was just a dare...
❥ Won’t Be Nice by coconutty ➴ Lovers/Poly!AU | Taehyung x Reader x Hoseok | One-Shot ➴ A night by the pool just got interesting...
KIM NAMJOON
❥ Covenant by fringesofsanity ➴ Arranged Marriage!AU | Namjoon x Reader | Series ➴ You are betrothed to Kim Namjoon, the heir of a real estate mogul. To say that it was a fairytale romance would be erroneous. You’re instead loped in the sad tale of the rich and melancholy.
❥ Read You Like A Book by coconutty ➴ University!AU | Namjoon x Reader | One-Shot ➴ Come get an attitude adjustment in the library, courtesy of Namjoon.
KIM SEOKJIN
❥ Éffleurer by @sugaurora / sugalights ➴ Office!AU | Seokjin x Reader | Series ➴ There were always whispers in your office about what secrets Seokjin hid behind his clean image. Now, you knew at least one of them. ❥ The City Comes Alive by minlouvre ➴ Musician/S2L!AU | Seokjin x Reader | Series ➴ Seokjin is a street performer who falls for a girl who is always passing him by. ❥ Seaside Sabbatical by dark_muse_iris ➴ Working Man!AU | Seokjin x Reader | One-Shot ➴ After an accountant in your firm is sent to prison, you are assigned to clean up the mess he left behind. Sorting out your clients’ disastrous business records proves beneficial when you meet the fisherman who teaches you the value of taking a break. ❥ Cake by yeyeniejjung ➴ Yandere/Killer!AU | Seokjin x Reader | Series ➴ "I was always hungry for your love. Just once, I wanted to know what is was like to get my fill of it. I wanted to be fed so much love that I couldn't take it anymore, just once." ❥ The Lord Taketh Away by dark_muse_iris ➴ Medieval/Werewolf!AU | Seokjin x Reader | One-Shot ➴ Every autumn, the dwindling harvest summons fears for the impending winter and its promise of scarcity. For Seokjin and his wife, faith lies in God and their local lord’s generosity to provide what their ailing son needs to survive another year. With each season, however, the lord grows cold-hearted and greedy, squeezing the young family to the brink of despair.
MIN YOONGI
❥ Zelus by SugaAconcept ➴ Lovers/Sugar Daddy!AU | Yoongi x Reader | One-Shot ➴ Yoongi becomes jealous when your close friend Jungkook puts his hands all over you right infront of his face. So, Yoongi decides to make sure you know who you really belong to. ❥ Carpe Diem by fringesofsanity ➴ Idol/Lovers!AU | Yoongi x Reader | Series ➴ Working for the UN, you are tasked to handle the poverty reduction campaign of a certain boy band. A certain rapper from the group however decides to mix business with pleasure.
JUNG HOSEOK
❥ Feel You From The Inside by coconutty  ➴ Idol/Staff!AU | Hoseok x Reader | One-Shot ➴ You've been watching him for months, little did you know, he's been watching you.
❥ As You Are by fringesofsanity ➴ Lovers!AU | Hoseok x Reader | One-Shot ➴ You're not the girl for Jung Hoseok. Him - who was sunshine and daisies and fireworks. You - who were back-alley darkness and used needles and burnt cigarettes. But he doesn't care. And you fucking hate yourself for it.
❥ The Thin Blue Line by bluesxde ➴ Pregnancy/E2L!AU | Hoseok x Reader | Series ➴ One badly-judged fling with Jung Hoseok, the son of a company-rival, leaves you with a little surprise.
PARK JIMIN
❥ His Throne by hseoks ➴ Royalty!AU | Jimin x Reader | Series ➴ You, a maid for the royal family, have sex with the irresistible Prince Park Jimin on his throne.
❥ Ineffable by fringesofsanity ➴ FWB!AU | Jimin x Reader | One-Shot ➴ You’ve only shared your body to Jimin, mostly silent after the act. The one time you decide to bare so much more, you find yourself baring your soul to him, far more than you bargained for.
❥ Blue Side by hoseokiehopie ➴ Ghost/Lovers!AU | Jimin x Reader | One-Shot ➴ You’re all too familiar with the legend that says the dead can walk freely on Halloween. It’s a secret you hold deeply within yourself. When a classmate starts to break down the walls you built so strongly after your boyfriend’s passing, you have to decide if you’re going to remain in the past with the dead, or live among the living.
KIM TAEHYUNG
❥ Effervescence by fringesofsanity ➴ Idol/Fling!AU | Taehyung x Reader | Series ➴ Just like the fizz of a cola on a hot summer’s day, your encounter with Taehyung is short but sparkly sweet.
OR Getting married in three months, you and your girls attend Ultra Miami to cap your single life, a final hurrah of some sort. What you didn’t expect is meeting a beguiling boy with a boxy smile who gives you a festival you’ll forever reminisce.
❥ Minutiae by coconutty ➴ Stalker!AU | Taehyung x Reader | Series ➴ Y/N meets a mysterious and alluring photographer and wants to interview him. Along the way things start getting a bit strange. What happens when you draw the attention of someone who always gets what they want?
❥ Flower Arrangements by iq_biased ➴ Pregnancy/Lovers!AU | Taehyung x Reader | One-Shot ➴ From the moment you met Taehyung, his flourish for life drew you in completely. It wasn’t long before you fell head over heals for the tattoo artist who was so wrong for you, it felt right. But your story hasn’t always been an easy one, and just recently it’s become a whole lot more complicated…
❥ Freaks Forever by yeyeniejjung ➴ Criminal/Psych!AU | Taehyung x Reader | Series ➴ "So tell me, Mister Kim, what's your ideal evening?"
"Ah..full moon, sex and drugs all night."
You are the psychologist to the world's most dangerous criminal, Kim Taehyung. Kim Taehyung is the man solely responsible for some of the most horrific crimes that the world has ever seen, from burglary, drug possession, sexual assaults, to brutal homicides of a total of 37 victims, though there are suspicions that there are more, that range from children to the elderly; both male and female. The two of you form an odd bond between your weekly sessions, causing you to somehow completely miss his blatant manipulation that soon controlled you in every aspect; resulting in his escape from prison and his bloodthirsty ways and eyes to be immediately turned onto you..but will he spare you in the end of the torturous time he keeps you or will your fate be the same as any other past victim of his?
❥ Slow Burn by fringesofsanity ➴ Idol/F2L!AU | Taehyung x Reader | Series  ➴ He was just supposed to be one of those clients. But then he gives you a night you’ll never forget. ❥ Noona by yuu14045 ➴ Neighbors/Lovers!AU | Taehyung x Reader | Series ➴ Taehyung, Jungkook, and Jimin lives in same apartment building. One day Taehyung received a mail for another Kim. She turned out to be Jimin's new neighbor.
❥ Snapped by Kpopyandere ➴ Yandere!AU | Taehyung x Reader | Series ➴ Your relationship with your boyfriend hasn't been going well lately. His twin, Kim Taehyung, decides to take advantage of this.
JEON JUNGKOOK
❥ If You’re Struggling Like I Am by @btssavedmylifeblr / bts_ruined_my_life ➴ Idol/Lovers!AU | Jungkook x Reader | Series ➴ You are hired as a makeup artist for BigHit working with BTS. You are older than all of them, yet, despite your best efforts, you find yourself slowing falling in love with the youngest member.
❥ My Cheating Amnesic Fiancé by Wrienne ➴ Idol/Arranged Marriage!AU | Jungkook x Reader | Series ➴ A series set in our world featuring Reader, the sole heiress of a multibillion-dollar company, and the Bangtan Boys' Golden Maknae - Jeon Jungkook. Mainly a romance, though doused with angst, drama and the twisted ways of fate. ❥ Return by Kpopyandere ➴ Yandere!AU | Jungkook x Reader | Series ➴ As Seokjin's girlfriend, you're off-limits, but Jungkook doesn't see it that way
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valley-of-the-lost · 3 years
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I don't know if you watched BPA, but.. I have a question, that I don't know if you can answer this, but it's been nagging at me (this is a multi-part ask, this will be a quick rundown): A blog that used to be interested in Barbie claimed that BPA has some racist undertones; this is because, as they claimed, due to the antagonist (who has, as they put it, brown skin) tries to take over the kingdom of a white princess/queen. 1/?- Barbie Multiverse Anon
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Okay, so, a quick explanation. This ask has been sitting in my inbox for a few days, and I sincerely apologize to Multiverse Anon for making them wait this long for me to weigh in on this. When I received this ask I was neck-deep in part of an art challenge that wore me out and I had not watched BPA (which I assumed was Barbie Princess Adventure) at the time, and I felt that this was the type of ask that I needed to chew on for a couple days and talk to some people before I was certain of my thoughts on it.
Now, I have done some cursory research, watched Barbie Princess Adventure myself, and bounced it off some of my friends for their take as well. Thus I will attempt to answer this to the best of my ability.
I do agree with the unknown blogger in question that Prince Johan is a brown-skinned character, and that the plot has racist implications due to the combination of this, him being the antagonist, and the fact that his kingdom lost a war to Amelia's prior to the plot to drive his motivation hence why Amelia is taking over the rule of both her own and his kingdom. However, I disagree with them that this is an ongoing theme or that there's a pattern of racist undertones in previous Barbie movies. At least from my own knowledge. 
(under a read more because I don’t want to clog people’s dashes, this is not a simple topic to unpack + the movie did some weird things I wanted to explain too)
Before I really delve into the meat of why I take this stance, I want to quickly discuss why I had to even assert that I agreed that Johan is a brown-skinned character as its own point on the off-chance someone else encounters the same initial weird impression I did. You can skip this part if you want, I'll put a triple asterisk where this ends (***).
Prior to watching BPA myself, I did some cursory research on the Barbie Movies wiki, prompted by this ask. I put together that Johan was probably the antagonist that was being referred to, but when I was on his page, his wiki picture was just this.
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This was all I had to go off of at this point, because he didn't have a screenshot gallery for me to cross-reference him throughout different points in the movie. So the conclusion I drew at the time was "he just looks like a tan white guy". This impression was reinforced by his light eyes and recycled Ken face model. I cross-referenced this with some friends, and we came to the conclusion that at best he looks racially ambiguous, with no reason to think he was a character of color unless there was other indication about his race in the movie itself.
And then I watched the movie. And changed my mind when I saw what he looked like in these scenes.
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Johan looks noticeably darker than he did in his single wiki picture, especially when next to other more obviously white characters like Barbie and Amelia. His skin tone is closer to Alphonso whom I would call a brown character pretty confidently in the same movie (I wanted to minimize comparisons across movies to eliminate the possible different variables that would come with it).
While this might not be as noticeable to other people casually watching the movie, I found this a bit jarring myself because I was focusing on his skin tone in particular due to the subject of the ask and my initial impression from the wiki picture when he was arguably at his lightest in the whole movie, as well as when he was introduced he was at his darkest because it was set at night. Also the way the animation team decided to shade him to convey that its nighttime confused me because he looked a lot darker than I thought someone of what I assumed his skin tone would look. And then the next scene with him and Barbie further confused me, because he suddenly got this reddish undertone that really highlighted their difference in skin color.
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(Barbie’s hands are on the left and Johan’s are on the right for sake of direct comparison)
Finally, in his last scenes in the movie, Johan's skin tone is most like that of his wiki picture's. Darker than Barbie's when they stand in the same shot but light enough that he could've passed as a tan white guy. What cemented my confusion is that he still looks like this in the throne room, where he was before when dancing with Barbie so it should reasonably have the same lighting and bring out that reddish undertone, but no he still looks like that. So my final conclusion on him was that since he looks like a brown-skinned character in around 2/3s of his scenes and there's a 2D painting of him in the bg when Barbie and Amelia are kidnapped, that he is indeed a brown-skinned character and the animation department probably fucked up their lighting which messed with how uniform his skin tone looked across scenes. ***
Now that I've explained my process of confusion and then final agreement that Johan is indeed brown-skinned, let's discuss how this compounds with other elements to create a rather unfortunate picture. I'm afraid its a bit worse than Anon described.
First off, the added context of the history between Amelia's kingdom of Floravia and his kingdom of Johanistan. Prior to the movie proper, these two countries fought in a war and Johanistan eventually surrendered to Floravia. The two countries signed a treaty that said that after her coronation, Amelia would rule both Floravia and Johanistan.
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There is a severe lack of critical details about the war itself, such as what caused it in the first place, which really works to the film’s disadvantage, since the absence of clarity does little to clear up the questionable implications of what is known about the relationship between Floravia and Johanistan.
Amelia’s kingdom is the one that took over Johan’s initially, since they won the war and Johanistan would be ruled by Floravia’s queen, with the implication being that she’d depose Johan’s family, the original ruling family. While the lack of details makes it so it can’t quite be said that Floravia is colonizing Johanistan, it also means that it can’t be said that Floravia is not colonizing Johanistan. What is known about the war is very broadly reminiscent of tactics white people have used to colonize other countries, such as using a war to depose the original royal family for the colonizer’s own gain (the US colonizing Hawaii by staging a coup against their ruling family because the white plantation owners got mad) and putting the other country in a disadvantageous position with a treaty (Opium Wars). This would probably just be viewed as normal Kingdom vs. Kingdom politics if... well Johan wasn’t a character of color.
Combined with viewing this movie through the lens of real-life racial biases (which people are predisposed to do because we're inherently based in reality), the likely conclusion drawn is that this white ruler (Amelia) is effectively ousting a character of color (Johan) and his family out of power and force-assimilating his country, and there's simply not enough clarity about previous events before the movie takes place to dispel it sufficiently.
This also poisons the plot proper because Johan's motivation is to take advantage of the law that the rule of both kingdoms falls to him if Amelia doesn't show up to coronation and regain rule of his own kingdom and Floravia as a nice plus. The intention was probably to show him as greedy for wanting lone rule of Floravia and Johanistan, taken together, it honestly comes across as the movie villianizing a character of color because he wants to regain sovereignty of his own kingdom from a white ruler. Its completely understandable that Amelia wouldn't want to lose her own kingdom especially coming off of war, but also her kingdom is also the one ousting out the previous royal family of Johanistan without giving any good reason why they can't compromise.
The effect would be somewhat mitigated if another character of color had a similarly prominent role as Johan on the side of Barbie, but there's really not. The closest I'd argue would be Alphonso, but he doesn't have equal plot relevance. This does, in my opinion, make Barbie Princess Adventure's plot give off racist vibes like that unknown blogger said. But I do not agree with them that there's a "pattern" of racist undertones in other Barbie movies.
Due to the lack of details of what exactly they meant by a "pattern" of racist undertones, I am assuming they mean a consistent pattern of racism across the movies, for example the movies consistently dipping into anti-Asian sentiments with their villains, or their plots inherently having racist vibes woven into them like I just talked about in BPA.
Despite the Barbie movies occasionally dipping into offensive territory, in my personal experience I have not observed a pattern of racist undertones or consistent racism targeting a specific group. I acknowledge that I could fully be wrong and a lot of things could have slipped past my notice, especially since I have not seen all the movies, but from the ones I have seen I have not observed a pattern with regards to this. However, I will point out the offensive/iffy things in the movies that I know of, with varying degrees of detail depending on how much I can remember. This is by no means a full compendium of all the problematic stuff Barbie films have touched on but these are the ones I am aware of at present.
Barbie of Swan Lake - Antisemitism. There was a TikTok on this somewhere that discussed this more in detail that I can't find but will link if I do, but what I do remember was Rothbart was given an extremely large nose which is reminiscent of the "Jewish nose" ethnic stereotype. Also there was something about his name and Tchaikovsky himself being antisemitic and those views being reflected in his ballet. I don't remember all the details I'm sorry and google wasn't giving me much.
Barbie in the Princess and the Pauper - Antisemitism. Preminger hits a couple of antisemitic stereotypes in the movie, such as having a noticeably larger, hooked nose compared to the other male characters which is reminiscent of the ethnic stereotype of the "Jewish nose" and being greedy and corrupt (literally mining every singe piece of gold out of the mines) which is a stereotype of Jewish people. His name is also of Jewish origin which by itself wouldn’t be a necessarily suspicious thing but combined with those other tropes it does add up.
Barbie Diaries - Tia, a black woman and also the only one with curly hair in the cast, making an iffy comment about "getting the tangles out of her hair". POC with different hair textures have gotten a lot of racist shit for their hair so even though this is a small oneoff comment seeing Tia talk about her hair like this in a negative manner rubbed some of my friends with curly hair wrong.
Barbie in a Mermaid Tale 2 - Polynesian racism. Another friend of mine who is Hawaiian brought this up in Mermaid Tale 2, when Merliah and co decided to have a luau (which is a traditional Hawaiian party or feast usually accompanied by entertainment) in Australia. My friend found it a bit iffy they were doing this when most everyone is white, but what they found worse was when poi was being served in the luau. Poi is a traditional Polynesian dish, but in the movie they claimed it was an Australian and Hawaiian dish, which its not, there’s no Australia in its origin. And then there was a "gag" where the people eating the poi were gagging on it, so essentially this movie was making a joke out of another culture's aesthetics and food.
Barbie Princess Adventure - Reread the above text.
Maybe my sample size isn’t big enough but I’m not seeing a pattern or a trend here, which in my opinion would be a larger cause for concern because for these movies their issues are largely contained to their specific movie, and a pattern would be indication of a wider problem. Maybe you see a pattern I don’t, that would be completely valid.
Now, do I think this means you can’t enjoy Barbie Princess Adventure? No, I’d be a bit of a hypocrite if I said that because I still enjoy some of the Barbie movies I listed above that I just said also have problematic elements (Swan Lake and Princess and the Pauper specifically). But I do think it is good to at the very least be aware of it, hear it out, keep it in mind. At the same time I understand why people would be turned off by this topic because they’re here to have fun riding the serotonin of childhood nostalgia and not delve into discourse.
But I hope I answered your question to your satisfaction Multiverse Anon! I’m going to go take a nap now I’m tired 😭.
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phoenotopia · 4 years
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The Last Phoenotopia Blog Update
(Date 2021 MAR 01)
I debated how to open this blog post, but perhaps the main crux of this blog post is the best place to start. The blog is being retired.
The purpose of this blog was to be a "development" blog for Phoenotopia, and well, Phoenotopia's development is done. I'll still be doing bug fixes and maintenance on the PC and Switch versions, and playstation and xbox ports are underway (by a publisher). But I'm not going to be making any more major changes to the game. At some point, you put the paintbrush down and say it's done. Blemishes and all.
Recent Events
The game launched on Steam last month, and like any launch, it was hectic. Bugs Galore. This is our first commercial PC launch, so it was a real baptism by fire. Unlike Switch's one configuration, the PC has multiple configurations and factors to account for. The game needed to be able to handle multiple control schemes, screen resolutions, refresh rates, and more! I had a 60Hz monitor going into launch and didn't know anything about Hz (I do now). There was a troublesome stutter that some players were sensitive to that my whole team didn't notice since our eyes compensated it away. There were a few times where in fixing something at one party's behest, it introduced problems for another party. A few times, due to disorganization, I unwittingly rolled back a fix that was meant to be applied. For some, the game couldn't play at all (really glad Steam allows refunds).
It was messy. It was tiring. I.AM.BEAT.
I think the worst of it is over... I'll still be around to do the last updates and bug fixes, but I'm ultimately ready for what's next.
SO what is next?
What isn't next... is Phoenotopia 2. As you may have heard down the grapevine, the game couldn't be what you call successful. No one's earned even minimum wage on it.
Maybe there's hope in the game's long tail. A year or two down the line... maybe. I won't hold my breath though. At some point in the past few months, I finished processing (or grieving) and it's time to move on.
The game has at least earned enough for us to continue our modest operations. As long as we don't expand the team, and we don't take another monster six-year dev cycle like what Phoenotopia took, we can continue. We'll have to be smarter and faster. Perhaps the most valuable thing we gained from all this is experience.
The Experience
It is a dev blog. Here are some of the lessons I've accumulated from this game's development.
- Have a good menu design. Menus aren't just that in-between fluff before you get to the good stuff. Menus are KEY. Your menus need to be robust, expandable, and *understandable* (to you, the developer). Because once the game's out, you will invariably be asked to add more options. And if your menu design is bad, every time you have to add a new menu option, it becomes a whole new pain all over again. Support mouse from the get-go, etc.
- Focus on features that people will actually care about. For instance, I've never seen anyone praise the camera's zoom feature. In practice, people try that feature a few times and then never use it again. But that feature was a constant consideration factor for every level. Run through it multiple times to make sure the level didn't break, think about which zoom levels made sense, resize rooms because they worked at one zoom level but not the other, and so on.
- Don't do boxes that you can move around. Other 2D platformers avoid movable boxes because they're a huge headache to program and they really complicate the game space. Enemies need to respond to boxes you throw in their path and either navigate around or attack it. When you're moving the box, you have to worry about constantly changing your collision size and reconciling when the box gets snagged on the environment. The boxes were also a constant source of bugs because people can manipulate them to soft-lock themselves and more.
- More focused script. Phoenotopia's 100,000+ word script was panned more for being bloated than it was praised for being lengthy. Long scripts take a long time to write and make the game more unwieldy, increasing the costs of translation and upkeep. Every update we're addressing some textual error or mistranslation. There are some highly renowned games (e.g. Hyper Light Drifter) that do without a script at all!
- Be flashy! A bat and a lightsaber take the same amount of work to program, but the lightsaber will draw a lot more attention and interest.
- Slopes, surprisingly! Six years ago when I started, Unity was ill-equipped for 2D games. If you used the physics that Unity provided you'd have a really floaty character that wouldn't adhere to the slope when going downhill. There were a hundred different tutorials saying different things (use forces, use move position, use translation, etc). You can get rectangular collisions done in a day, but to do slopes took weeks. Meanwhile, games can actually get by fine without slopes. Most people won't even notice. Did you know the Phoenotopia flash game didn't have slopes? Neither does Hollow Knight or Rogue Legacy. You can save yourself a lot of work by avoiding slopes.
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(big entities look weird on slopes. Bad slope!)
I could write enough little knowledge nuggets like this to fill a book! But I'd rather just make the next game. 
So… what IS next?
As mentioned previously, it's not Phoenotopia 2. Pirate and I are mostly just tossing some ideas back and forth right now. We'll go silent for a year (or two). Our next game's scope will be more modest in some ways, more ambitious in others. It will definitely be more smartly designed. (There will be a map!)
We'll announce it when it's ready for the public. It might be necessary for us to do a kickstarter. I've tried to avoid kickstarters having been burnt on quite a few myself and also because I worry that mismanaging a kickstarter would earn the ire of backers.
But I did keep this blog regularly updated for six years. So I've gained some confidence in my abilities to at least manage a kickstarter well.
Is it really the last Phoenotopia Blog update though?
Okay, not really. There is some news that I'll need to announce, and this blog is one of the game's main outreach channels. Here are the events that will cause me to update the blog:
Announcing the launch of the xbox/playstation ports when they're ready
If a physical edition of the game happens
If a new language is getting introduced into the game (Korean is a high possibility)
When we're ready to talk about our next game
If (BIG IF) we begin development on a Phoenotopia sequel. I do want to do a sequel one day if we have the means and the demand is there. 
Those updates will be more on a "when they happen" basis, rather than me reporting in every couple months.
Fan Art
As always, I'm very happy to see fanart of Phoenotopia. Major thanks again to Pimez for collecting all the artwork from the corners of the internet! Since this is the "last" blogpost, Sir Pimez can finally take a rest from collecting the fanart :P
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ÆV made a series of pictures that tell a story. A Pooki is humanely sheared of its wool to create a hat. The Pooki is unharmed. Nice! Gotta love Gail’s expressions.
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Amagoo Mazeru makes a stunning landscape shot of a full moon and shooting stars. It’s a sharp and clear vector art. I like the faint glow of the moon and the fire and the subtle gradient in the night sky. Very skillfully done!
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Hah hah. I got a chuckle out of this one. I imagine this is how Gail's enemies see her by the end of the game. CaESar made this image based on TerminalMontage's famous youtube videos. Nailed it!
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CrownStar drew two pictures of Gail. I'm a big player of JRPGs, so the first shot instantly reminded me of Persona 4's art style. (Hmmm... Phoeonotopia as a JRPG... there’s potential there...) Next, Birdy is shown carried off after her defeat. I really like Birdy's expression here - she just seems mildly uncomfortable.
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There's a bit of a story behind the first image. As Firanka shares it, she wasn't able to defeat the Big Eye monster at the end of the flash game, so she believed a tall tale that what awaited after was a 6 armed Kobold boss. Hilarious! The second is a rendition of the lonely Anuri elder. A rare subject. The loneliness is portrayed well here. I feel lonely just looking at it!
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Koo_chop draws the clash between Gail and Katash at the top of the towers. I really like this interpretation of the game's art style. It’s faithful to the in-game graphics. And the lighting, from the glow of Gail's bat, to Katash's sword, and the lightning in the background... Amazing!
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Lime Hazard shows Gail with a salute pose. Very appropriate for this occasion. I also like how there's a slight tilt in the angle that Gail is portrayed. Those dynamic angles are always hard to get right, and Lime Hazard pulled it off very skillfully. See you next mission!
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Lyoung0J with a digital painting of Gail posed sitting on a rock. I like how it almost seems like she was caught in a candid moment - she’s smiling, but also feeling self-conscious. Cute! The art style really pops, and I like how Gail is sporting what I call the old anime style nose. 
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MyUesrNameIsSh*t with a sketch of Gail performing a skillful slingshot. I like how Gail is depicted with her tongue out in a mischievous manner, the way all mischievous people with slingshots do.
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Niitsu Kentaro returns with a 2021 Happy New Year picture. That happened didn't it? A New Year... Gail's pose gave me a chuckle with how she seems to be waving the bat around as casually as one would wave hello. And "Phoenotopiyear"... Well said! One day we'll have our Phoenotopiyear...
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Ochan Nu breaks all records with a stunning NINE pictures in one session :O
There's so many goodies here. My favorite would be the one with Gail staring intently at the screen - it's like she's looking directly at you. You almost feel uncomfortable.
Next, there's an Animal Crossing villager dressed as Gail and sporting her pink hair. It even looks like a house Gail would live in. Gail is a connoisseur of the arts and likes Mona Lisa. Yes :)
There are various comics of Gail pointing out Gail's weird food habits. A picture of Fran looking really cool, and even Gail rocking a bathing suit. (bathing suit image linked here in case NSFW). Wow!
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Pimez didn't just collect the arts, he creates them as well! This one, which he aptly named 'The Year 175' is a depiction of when the dragons invaded the towers as told by an elderly Daean woman. Great pixeling skills! I got a good chuckle from the ice dragon leaving with its stuff slung over its shoulder.
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Quo made a stunning picture of Gail playing the flute surrounded by the 5 musical notes and the Phoenix logo behind her. The theme seems to be "fire" and it works really well. Gail herself looks awesome depicted in her red suit - it's like she's leading a marching band!
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Rai Asuha depicts Gail in the late game with her red suit, and night star bat, and holding a lamp. She looks ready for adventure! I really like the white outline here and Gail's poofy shoulders here - the art style feels reminiscent of Final Fantasy Tactics.
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Seri also draws Gail bearing her late game equipment. Unique to Seri's drawing is how all of Gail's equipment is accessible from a pocket on her shirt. I also like how Gail is depicted with her lucky earrings - that accessory is often forgotten.
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Treedude depicts Gail with a bat and wearing a funny smirk. She looks like she's ready to hurt someone!
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Warotar returns with everyone's favorite Great Drake, Bubbles! It seems so happy to be featured!
I'm really grateful for all the fanart this game has received. From the bottom of my heart, thank you!
Closing Notes
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Pirate drew a picture to mark the occasion. It shows Gail enjoying a hot chocolate with marshmallows and a pumpkin muffin. A rest well-earned...
Goodbye! Until next time!
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world-of-puppets · 4 years
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Puppetry Lost Media
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In honour of reaching 50 followers last week (now 55 followers, as of writing this) I decided to cover two subjects of great interest to me: puppetry (of course) and lost media.
Everybody online loves a good old bit of lost media. Whether it be being a part of the many searches for the media in question, or watching documentaries about them on sites like YouTube. I’ve been mildly addicted to the latter kind of content for a while. From what I’ve seen, though, there aren’t many videos or articles out there specifically covering lost puppetry. So, in no particular order, here are a couple of pieces of lost puppetry I found while scrolling through the lost media wiki.
銀河少年隊 - Ginga shounen-tai AKA Galaxy Boy Troop (1963 - 1965)
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Osamu Tezuka is one of the most pioneering figures in Japanese art and animation. Starting as a manga artist in the 1940s inspired by the animated works of American studios such as Walt Disney and the Fliecer Brothers, he adapted and simplified many of the stylistic techniques of both artists to create his own signature style of big shiny eyes, physics defying hair and limited animation. A style that would go on to heavily influence the world of anime and manga as a whole.
But animation and graphic art were not the only mediums Tezuka would dabble in. Ginga Shounen-Tai, or Galaxy Boy Troop in english, was a television series that aired on the public broadcast channel NHK from April 7th, 1963 to April 1st, 1965. Running for 2 seasons with a total of 92 episodes.
The series was a mixture of marionette characters that utilised the Supermarionation marionette technique, popularised by Jerry Anderson’s Thunderbirds, and limited traditional animation. The story revolves around a child genius named Roy who leads a rag-tag group of heros around the galaxy in a rocket ship in order to revive the earth’s sun and later protect it from alien invaders.
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Out of the 92 episodes that aired, only episode 67 still exists in its entirety with French subtitles, and the full episode can be found on YouTube with English subtitles uploaded by user Rare TezukaVids. According to user F-Man on the Tezuka in English forums, footage of episode 28 exists but with no audio, and episode 87’s animated segments exist without the marionette segments. F-Man also claims the reason for Galaxy Boy Troop’s disappearance is due to Tezuka not being proud of the series and having all episodes of it destroyed.
Personally, I think it’s a shame that pretty much all of this series is gone. From what I’ve seen in episode 67, it looks really charming. Tezuka’s signature character design style was adapted suprisingly well to marionettes, and the puppetry itself isn’t that bad either. I love the little face mechanisms like the blinking eyes, flapping mouths and others. It gives the puppets a lot of personality and charm. Like, just look at this old mans eyebrow mechanism and tell me you wouldn’t want to watch 92 episodes of this show;
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Tinseltown (2007)
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Tinseltown was a 15 minute sitcom pilot created by the Jim Henson company under thier Henson Alternative banner. The pilot was commissioned by the Logo Network and aired as part of the Alien Boot Camp programming block in 2007.
The pilot (and likely the series, had it been picked up by the logo network) features a cast of both puppets and live actors as characters. The premise revolves around Samson Kight, an anthropomorphic bull preformed by Brian Henson and drew Massey, and his partner Bobby Vegan, an anthropomorphic pig prefomed by Bill Barretta and Michelan Sisti, as they attempt to balance thier lives working in Hollywood with life as parents to thier sullen 12-year-old foster son, Foster, played by Paul Butcher. Other human characters included Mia Sara as Samson’s ex-wife Lena and Francesco Quinn as the family’s manservant Arturo.
The Tinseltown pilot used to be available on the Logo Network’s YouTube channel, but was later removed for unknown reason. Since then, the pilot has not been made available online. However the characters Samson and Bobby have made appearances in other Henson related works, such as the improv stage show Stuffed and Unstrung, where they played the role as the shows producers, and in a 2011 video on the Jim Henson Company YouTube channel celebrating Jim Hensons 75th birthday.
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I find Tinseltown pretty interesting as I feel like it should be more noateable or known, considering that this is (as far as my knowledge goes) the first Jim Henson Company project featureing openly lgbtq characters as its leads, and would have been the first Henson show to do so had it been picked up. As someone who’s interested in lgbtq+ representation in creative media such as animation, I realised that there’s not many examples of canon lgbt characters in puppetry. The only ones aside from Samson and Bobby I could think off the top of my head would be Deet’s Dads from The Dark Crystal: Age of Resistance and Rod from Avenue Q. Though, obviously, there could be more I’m not currently aware of. I don’t think the Tinseltown pilot was a masterpiece or anything. After all, there’s probably a couple of good reasons Logo didn’t pick it up for a full series. But I think it be cool if either Henson co. or Logo made this available online again, if just so we could appericate it as an interesting little footnote in the history of lgbtq rep in puppetry.
With that said, considering the pilot’s obscurity and the fact that it’s main couple haven’t been used in any Henson Related projects in almost ten years, as well as the possibility that there may be legalities preventing the Henson company from releasing it such as Logo still owning the rights, it’s unlikely we’ll see the Tinseltown pilot anytime soon.
Sonic Live in Sydney (1997 - 2000)
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Sonic the Hedgehog is a fictional character no stranger to multiple interpretations of him and his universe across a diverse range of media. From the more light-hearted and comedic stylings of The Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog and Cartoon Networks Sonic Boom cartoon series, to more serious faire such as the Sonic SatAM cartoon and the Sonic Adventure videogame duology. One of the more obscure and stranger adaptations of the character came in the form of Sonic Live in Sydney, a one an a half hour live show hosted at the former Sega World Sydney amusement park in Darling Harbor, Sydney, Australia. Originally beginning as a live show with actors in meet-and-greet style costumes, the show eventually was replaced with a puppet show during its last two years.
The shows plot was set in an alternate timeline whos continuity was a mix of the SatAM cartoon and Sonic the Hedgehog 3, where Doctor Robotnik’s Death Egg crash lands in Sydney, Australia instead of Angel Island and attempts to take over before being foiled by sonic and friends. According to Phillip Einfeld of Phillip Einfeld Puppetoons, the company that made the puppets, Sega felt the costumed actor version of the show wasn’t dynamic enough, and wished to replace it with a version featuring live puppets with animatronics. Both versions of the shows plot are identical.
While Sonic Live in Sydney’s soundtrack is available on YouTube, and some photos of the show are available on the Lost Media Wiki, no footage of either the costumed actors version or the puppet show version have resurfaced. The show was closed down in 1999, possibly due to cost, shortly before the Sega World park as a whole in 2000. So unless there is someone out there who viseted the show between 1998 or 1999 who recorded the show via a handheld camera, footage of both incarnations of the show are likely forever lost to time.
On a personal note, I don’t have much to say on this one other than how gloriously peek gaudy 90s Sonic the set/puppet design is. I have no doubt finding footage of these puppets in action would truly be a silly delight to behold...
Legend of Mary (year unknown)
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This one is a little different from the other entries on this list as while the film itself in its entiraty is available on YouTube for anyone to view, the information surrounding Legend of Mary, specifically its year of release, remains a mystery as of writing this.
I have mentioned the film before on this blog so I’ll keep it brief here: in summary, Legend of Mary is a short film retelling of the Nativity featuring the Rod puppets of Austrian puppeteer Richard Teschner. the video was uploaded to YouTube by user canada 150 archive. I looked up the people credited in the film and was able to find most of them, but didn’t find Legend of Mary listed in thier credits, and was unable to find the film on sites like IMDB, tMDB or Letterboxd. I reached out to Canada 150 archive asking if they had any info regarding the Legend of Mary’s release date, and after a coupe of months, they replied saying they didn’t know.
And that’s as far as I got on my search for answers, if anyone of you guys has any information regarding Legend of Mary, then it be of huge help in finding the release date.
Sam and friends (1955 - 1961)
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Sam and friends was the very first puppetry television series created by Jim Henson alongside his colabarator and future wife Jane Nebel. filmed in Washington, D.C. and airing twice daily on WRC-TV and the NBC affiliate in Washington, D.C. from May 9, 1955, to December 15, Sam and Friends would mark the first apperence of Kermit (though not yet as a frog) and paved the way for Henson’s iconic and revered legacy in the realm of puppetry on film and television.
With the impact this show had in mind, it may come as a shock to some that almost half of Sam and Friends, specifically, 42 of the 86 episodes, are considered lost. With 16 existing, 8 documented, 9 known from memory, plus 8 existing Esskay commercials and 1 memory-known Esskay commercial. Some taped episodes have been shown at venues such as the museum of the moving image while others have been erased. It’s unknown if copies of these erased episodes still exist.
This post would become far to long if I were too list every episode missing from Sam and Freinds, but if your curious, the lost media wiki article has a comprehensive list of all lost episodes.
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Annnd that about it for this post. This type of content is pretty different from the stuff I usually post. So I’m egar to see what you guys think about it. If you enjoyed this article, want to see more like it or have ideas for what puppetry-related topics I should cover in the future. And again, thank you all so much for helping me reach 55 followers. Your support really does mean a lot to me, and I hope you enjoyed this as a follower milestone gift.
Anyways, hope you enjoyed this dip into lost puppetry, and have a happy holiday season!
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flapperdame16 · 3 years
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The Queen by Matthew Dennison Book Review!
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(image: Head of Zeus Publishing)
Anyone who knows even a little inkling about me will know how much of a supporter I am of The Queen and the British Royal family. Since my childhood, I've been fascinated with Queen Elizabeth, even telling my Mom as young as age three (in the late 90s) I wanted to, "visit a place with a Queen".
At that age I didn't know the Queen by name, but the image I had inside my head was definitely of Elizabeth. A woman with short white hair wearing a crown was what the image of a, "Queen" , was to me. Fast forward to late 2010, just before William and Kate's engagement, and I became a full blown Royal watcher. Since I have been 14, I collect magazines, make an effort to watch video appearances, see documentaries, and follow many Monarchy devoted blogs and social media accounts to keep up with what is happening within "the fold". I watch The Crown every season on its release date (or close to its release date), and know all the latest buzz, but bizarrely, I never have sat down to read a full life biography of Queen Elizabeth. I have magazines, and coffee table books about her, but never chose out a biography. It's so difficult to choose a good one in a sea full of books, and for that, I am so thrilled I got the opportunity to read distinguished royal author Matthew Dennison's (he has written three other royal biographies) newest book simply and elegantly titled: The Queen. What makes Dennison's book stand out against the rest is firstly it's one of the first books to be published about the Queen after the death of Prince Philip, The Duke of Edinburgh. It looks at their relationship throughout its entirety, giving a fresh examination on the longest royal marriage in history. It was comforting to be reassured how strong the bond between Philip and Elizabeth was. Sure they had their rough patches in their relationship, and nasty rumors along the way, (particularly in the late 50s), but I'd venture to say any marriage, and relationship that was established for 73 years does. It's not so much the bumps in the road they had, it was how they were able to navigate and work through them that counts. It's important to remember Philip and Elizabeth fought for their love, at the time of their marriage with anti-German sentiment, and they endured right up to Philip's death. Its inspiring, especially in the time we live in now. Secondly, I will mention this book does not deviate on tangents about others, its focus is always centered on Elizabeth. Throughout  her long reign, many players both personally and professionally have crossed paths with HM; prime ministers, daughters-in-law, members of staff, and a whole bunch of others. Rather than devoting entire paragraphs to other players such as Prime Minister Winston Churchill, Princess Diana, HM The Queen Mother, or Private Secretary Martin Charteris, Dennsion gives us info about them on a need to know basis in relation to their relation to Queen Elizabeth. This keeps the writing focused with a strong flow in regards to the star subject. At the same time, it allows you to have basis of facts of certain players you may not know much about. During my own reading, to have a background context of the Prime Ministers was certainly a highlight for me, as I personally don't know much about the British Parliament and the people in it! Moreover, I want to point out how fascinating it was to read an in depth analysis of HM's childhood and young adult life before becoming Queen, as it's really the "least" documented part of her life. As with Queen Victoria many people only see Elizabeth as, "The old lady Queen", and it's sad many  forget at one point she was a vibrant young women who reveled in being a 1950s military wife, and someone who grew up in a close knit household in a family unit of consisting of "we four" (herself, her parents, and sister, Margaret).
When she was born in 1926, Elizabeth was not in immediate line for the throne as her father Bertie (later George VI) was the second son of George V. David (later the abdicated, Edward VIII) was the oldest son and therefore, first in line. Elizabeth's childhood until the 1936 abdication (and the following Second World War) was spent as minor royalty, that only serious royal watchers in the 1920s/1930s would read about. Yet at the same time, she was the only "princess" at the time of her birth, and she was the only titled royal grandchild. Elizabeth had cousins who were daughter of her aunt, Princess Mary, Countess of Harewood, but those two sons were not HRHs. I learned just how fascinated people were with HM in her childhood, and it really drew parallels to how today people are fascinated with Princess Charlotte. From sparking name trends, to clothing trends, to making popular toys come en vogue, princess inspiration has always been in the public interest! Finally, I'd like to bring the to attention the fair criticism this book brings to Elizabeth's reign: it's no secret that no one is perfect. Elizabeth has had her fair share of political clashes, family problems and even scandals within her long reign. Its balanced in saying the longer one lives, the more events- both good and bad- you witness. The book is pretty nuanced when bringing up touchy topics such as the Princess Margaret and Group Captain Peter Townsend's romance, HM's parenting skills/ relationships with her children, the Aberfan disaster of 1966, and Princess Diana' death to name a few.
As in within the book, it's all about points of view and the facts. I'm delighted to say the book doesn't take sides when viewing these topics, rather gives enough info for the reader to form their own opinion. I must say, however, I particularly didn't care for the slightly snide remarks given towards Princess Diana- always calling her every move "revenge" towards the family. That rubbed me the wrong way, but as I said, it's all about perception.
Overall, this book was a really informative read that is not just a rehash of the same ol', same ol' you would read in any random biography of Queen Elizabeth. With the last chapter clocking in at page 506, it may seem like a long dung out read, but it goes by quickly once you start digging in. (Personally I spotted one error on page 403, it's William Arthur Philip Louis, not William Philip Arthur!)
What I personally took away from the read was The Queen is an enduring woman. She's witnessed hardships of war, family crisis, premature deaths, scandals, and even the covid-19 pandemic, yet she's always been there for her people, her family and her country. She's been able to navigate changing times and as The Crown actress Claire Foy has said in her 2017 Golden Globes acceptance speech, Elizabeth has been at "the center of the world" since 1953 when she ascended to the throne. I don't think I myself could do better if I were in her shoes, and all that's left to do now, I believe,  is to appreciate her hard work and dedication. God save the Queen!
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Above: My Copy of The Queen with (some of!) my other Royal books! :)
I'd like thank Hailey and the whole team at Kaye Publicity for sending me a copy of the book to read and review. The Queen by Matthew Dennison will be available to own on September 1, 2021 in the USA and is available worldwide online and in participating stores. Links are as follows, and check out my YouTube Review video HERE)
AMAZON USA (Hardcover)
Barnes and Noble
AMAZON UK (Hardcover)
The Queen Goodreads' page
Matthew Dennison Author page
The Queen (Head of Zeus Publishing page)
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