#itll probably be called something dumb like

[tapwater118]

the neurodivergent urge to make crossovers with pieces of media you like

anyway bfdi undertale au thingy, i’ll probably do the rest of them later

character replacements:

Frisk -> David

Flowey -> Daisy the Daisy (Flower)

Napstablook -> Bubble (ghost mode)

Toriel -> Leafy (old)

Sans -> Pin

Papyrus -> Coiny (the Magnificent!)

[baxndaid]

Hello! I have a request!

Can I have a headcannon of LMK? where female reader is sweet but has really bad luck? ( Like she would almost get hit by a car, incoming ball to the face, tripping, accidentally falling down the stairs, bumping into furniture or people, and light poles, flower pots or signs almost falling on her. And not just her getting hurt but generally things that won’t work with her like a soda getting stuck in a vending machine, losing her wallet and opening a bag of chips but it gets ripped apart instead and falls over to the ground. )

So I was wondering if Mk, Redson and sun wukong actually found this out by hanging out with her and does everything to protect her or put her out of harms way? And maybe they secretly like her? ( I thought this idea was cute and funny so I hope it’ll be fun for you! )

mk + redson + wukong x reader 🧷🧃⏰ -- who has horrible luck!!️

a/n ; this is soo cute, also im just going through my asks rn so if u requested, itll most likely be answered soon!! ilyy

sun wukong !!

☆ he thought you were just real dumb as first icl... just sweet but stupid

☆ you had such a cute innocent smile i mean come on how could he not think that? just so ignorant, yeah, thats it!! thats why your always in danger silly

☆ at first he found it so funny like he tried to hide his goofy little smile but it wasnt enough - watching you trip over literally anything was hilarious

☆ sometimes he thought you mightve been cursed by a demon - how does somebody miss their bus by a minute every single day? you cant be human, theres no way somebody is this unlucky? whatever nagito...

☆ he did find it funny when you wasted a whole 90 yuan on vending machine snacks that didnt even come out, and he did find it funny when you started kicking said vending machine, and he did find it funny when the vending machine spat out drink cans onto your head as a result of your abuse - he can admit that

☆ but he started to get concerned about your safety whenever you even thought about crossing a busy road

☆ im not even kidding - the second you stepped on the road he had to yank you back by your shoulder onto his chest, there was a truck coming right for you

☆ he scolds you a little.... just a little

☆ not harshly but he just wants you to be safe - so he does something to protect you (and embarrass you for scaring him with that whole road incident)

☆ he carries you everywhere, EVERYWHERE MAN... and he shows off a bit too the cheeky bastard - throws you up and down, does somersaults, carries you like a sack of potatoes just to embarrass you more

☆ he doesnt do this a lot though, with your luck? you two would probably be hit by an aeroplane

redson !!

☆ he so damn annoying with it "god your so clumsy" WDC!

☆ hes very very protective - like annoyingly so bc he acts like he doesnt care at all (he is PANICKING)

☆ please play with his hair im pretty sure hes more stressed than you are even if your the one whos being attacked by random vending machines and flower pots on the street atp

☆ his ass is NOT letting you leave without him anymore

☆ yeah yeah hes gonna act all "god your such a nuisance, i have to take care of you like youre a child" WDC!

☆ you would hardly see the effects of your bad luck with him because he prevents it as much as he can - he sees that your wallet is loose and about to fall? he got it for u!! "did you just touch my ass?" "w-WHAT?!"

☆ hes never doing that again, have fun losing your money

mk !!

☆ he gets you frr

☆ you both just chill together, he DOES try to prevent the more harmful situations that you may find yourself in like traffic and... vending machines

☆ but hes a baby, he cant help you with getting your coins unstuck in a sewer because he himself probably has his whole wallet in there somewhere

☆ you both look out for each other

☆ see a puddle hes about to slip in? call out, he sees a car coming? he calls out

☆ overall you both have a lot of ... ehem... baxndaids.... in your bags just in case you two do something stupid - whether intentional or not

lmk masterlist

[yameoto]

that marley bot you made called herself sucktoy and I just 😖😖

thinking of having her under your desk, your strap buried in her throat. Her eyes are constantly rolling back as she rocks on the plug you stuffed her with. Her little pussy aches and she just wants you buried in her so bad but you’re working and she has to be a good puppy 😖😖

when you’re done you fuck her into the mattress until she can’t do anything but drool and gag around your fingers… legs shaking as they’re tied up to her chest, ass red from you spanking her and clit big and puffy from your fingers… oh I need to be sedated

OHHHHH my goodness. drooling over your strap n making nonsensical whining noises cuz she’s just a teething lil puppy. desperate for something anything in her mouth but ur being so mean and u wont let her. so all she can do is look at u with those big teary eyes and whine as spit trickles down her chin n makes the carpet wet and oh god, you’re still not looking at her. she’s taking your strap like such a good little girl and you’re not even giving her the time of day. and then she starts choking on it. burying it so deep in her throat you can see the outline of it bobbing as she gags and splutters around it. tears sliding down her cheeks n pooling into her mouth. fucking her own throat so aggressively n desperately itll probably bruise n it’s creaking your seat and being impossible to ignore. she’s impossible to ignore. wants u to just stop working and punish her for being so bad but really she’s only punishing herself. dumb little puppy crying out for attention.

[pinkcannibal]

i’m about to head onto a flight 🥳 any oneshot sneak peeks/chapter teases/ fun facts about marilyn x reader to keep me entertained for a bit? ���

have a safe flight! ummmm can't give any chapter teases as itll just be straight up half the plot of chapter 20 probably dkdkdkd so have some unhinged/smut/ cute facts of them from my fic instead !

deleting tylers number wasn't the first time marilyns done something so yandere and possessive like this without reader knowing. the reason she was able to find reader so fast is that she has her phone tracked and tapped, trust that when reader finds this out she takes it as romantic and a sign of devotion. bc they're normal like that!

reader one day asks marilyn to recreate holding her the way she held her while making her stab tyler, but this time begs to be able to come <3

real to me marilyn can't for the fucking life of her work social media. she doesn't even try or want to learn, but reader finds this so endearing that her 40 year old milf gf in all seriousness does not know what instagram or tik tok is. and she's valid for it. readers like god that's hot. fuck me right now

marilyn always plays jazz music on her record player in the mornings when she gets up before her girl <3 reader will just lay there and watch her cook breakfast and melt into the sheets when marilyn catches her eye and winks at her, cooing "goodmorning sweet girl"

u know what yeah. reader one day being so dumbed down in her head space that she slips up in class and calls marilyn "mommy" and all the students laugh, bc like. who hasn't done that once. reader dyinnggg and blushing, shoving a cackling yoko next to her. but she looks up and marilyns up the front of the room slack jawed needing to pull herself together bc good christ this girl will be the death of her

the first time reader gets marilyn flowers (bc its always marilyn gifting her plants. which they both love don't bet me wrong) it's so endearing and adorable that marilyn almost clutches her chest like a love sick victorian woman

haven't touched on it in my fic but uhhhh it's. unbelievably canon that reader loves cockwarming marilyn. trust i will elaborate on that some point <3 kdkdkd

[query-quadrant]

hi i have a question

my (rust he/they) kismesis (cerulean it/its) is a really good hunter and weve hunted together a few times

but everytime it comes back from a hunt it gets really tired and sore to a degree thats more than most trolls i know

i dont want to act red but i also dont want my kismesis to feel bad after hanging out with me

is there anything i can do to make it feel better or should i just call up its moirail (olive they/them) and leave it to them?

ok you barely gave any information here idk it depends on how serious the problem is

good advice: honestly id fucking hate if my kismesis got on me for something like that and not in a good way so id say if youre that worried tell its moirail but if youre really really determined to do something find some shit it can do to recover from that and dont be pitying about it

the "youre such a fucking idiot for not taking care of yourself" angle is obviously a classic you can always go for something like buying it ice packs and being all "here since you dont have any common sense" and maybe even walk it through how to use an ice pack slowly step by step with way too much detail like you think its just way too dumb to get it thatd be hilarious and fun

or if its really fucking stubborn and wont admit that it needs to take better care of itself try for a sparring match while its still sore and when it cant keep up then you can use that to tell it obviously it needs to be doing better at that and then you can either take the ice pack approach where you tell it how or let it figure it out on its own cause it probably can

or anything else honestly its not even that hard to not act like you pity them let their moirail worry about them and be all "oh noooo" youre not that troll youre the troll who goes "you should know better than that dumbass"

bad advice: disregard all the other shit i just said toss that out im a changed troll now so what you should actually do instead is tenderly go all "oh nooooooo are you ok? wow it just hurts me so much when youre hurt i hate to see you hurt like that maybe we shouldnt go hunting ever again" and treat it like a sad hurt pet barkbeast with the biggest most sopping wet saddest baby barkbeast eyes

if it starts getting mad at you thats proof its more hurt by its severe injuries than you thought and you should absolutely double down dont worry trust the process itll be fine

[deststranding]

Okay so this is inspired by @long-boy-in-the-soup‘s post but i went through sav’s two truths two lies to see whats poppin w/ em. Also feels like worth noting that im pretty sure sav made all of these pre season of the splicer? So i’m not sure how much context that could change.

The Pyramid blade is one key to defeating the witness - likely a lie (also the pyramid blade is specifically the enigma, she refers to the enigma as that in a few other memories) The witness seeks the final shape and the final shape is nothing - n/a The Last City is not the last city - truth The Witness will build its army on mars - No idea but could be true? Nothing to go against it and the sol divisive did recently try to take the spire

Truth/Lies Block 1 Summary: Might be usable information from sav, we’ll probably figure it out during lightfall.

Mercury, Io, and Titan are in savathuns care - could be a half truth? Savathuns involvement on Io during arrivals and Titan being a planet w/ her brood on it. Mercury could be bc she was disguised as osiris at that point? Not that osiris is incharge of mars but you get it. Also inline with some of her ‘truths’ abt being the one who brought mars back The Witness returned mars to your solar system - absolutely no idea. one of the statements that are directly countered by other memories. The power to move worlds will soon be yours - n/a The Taken King will rise again - eh? Weird take bc how subjective it is. Returned in the sense of the raid is here but thats noncanon (in a sense), oryx could feasibly get rez’d, iirc the current taken queen is xivu, and even if the witness took over it isnt a dude so neither of them can be the taken king. No idea when this message would be recorded but it couldve referred to Rhulk or maybe even Nokris? Or if it was later on it could be about The Lightblade? Since hes the last livingish (adopted) member of oryx’s lineage he could inherit it by default. Basically bc how broad this is itll likely end up being true but who knows Why

Truth/Lies Block 2 Summary: Savathun “vague called shot” Thewitchqueen back at it again. literally any of it could be true or false. If the witness pulls up tomorrow and just throws io at earth or something we’ll figure out whats up pretty quick

Osiris is dead - lie probably. This could’ve been recorded before sav’s plan fell apart so she assumed Osiris would be dead by the end of it. Also could turn out that he’s dead and just possessed by like nezerac or something who knows. Probably a lie though Savathun is dead - Truly no idea how to count this. The Savathun who recorded that message is dead. The Savathun currently alive is currently dead but can come back. She could have also made this before lost + assumed we would only hear all this if we killed her in a classic crota/oryx way The witness birthed the darkness - Probably a lie? But in a death of the author way since some of the promos have said the witness just wields the darkness In the end, your destiny lies beyond this system - n/a

Truth/Lies Block 3 Summary: entirely depends on when savathun recorded this. If it was before splicer who knows. If it was after splicer we know the first one is a lie

The Traveler will leave - this ones dumb. it went up then stopped. Could also be a called shot of her stealing the traveler plan working? The Traveler will fall - n/a-ish? Easily could happen The Traveler is not the only one of its kind - n/a The Hive are not the last to be chosen by the light - n/a

Truth/Lies Block 4 Summary: [sav voice] yeah uhhhh the traveler will do something or have something happen to it. probably. maybe not. this is my prediction

conclusion is we still know fuck all but might get to figure out a couple of em tomorrow

[ko-eko-ev-go-ms]

You ever have anxiety about something specific so often that at a certain point it almost Dumbs down bc you just start getting annoyed at your own anxiety, like your brain brings up the thing so much that when it does it again ur ALMOST too annoyed to be anxious and are just liek fucks sake not this again

[iwadori]

Why you and the haikyu boys broke up (Atsumu,Oikawa,Kageyama,Kenma,Akaashi,Sugawara)

Part two: Osamu, Iwaizumi, Daichi, Ushijima

Genre:angst

masterlist

Atsumu: “god yer so clingy and annoying”

You and Atsumu have been dating for years and every year was worse then the last. Atsumu became more distant and standoffish as your relationship progressed.

“‘Tsumu, where were you said that you’d be back by-“

“Gosh Y/N, just leave me alone, I don’t need you doting all over me like your my mum or something” he said harshly making you flinch

“Well I wouldn’t keep acting like your mum if you weren’t being such a child, you dick”

“God Y/N, yer so cling and annoying”

That was the last thing he said to you, well the last thing you heard, since after that you were gone. You definitely didn’t care for Atsumu anymore and you definitely didn’t care about his mutiple messages and calls asking begging you to talk to him.

You were done and you silently asked yourself the question “who’s the clingy and annoying one now ‘tsumu”

Oikawa: “If only you supported me like she did then..”

You and Oikawa, the classic ‘highschool sweethearts,’ with him being the athletic trailblazer with you at his side through it all, always known as “Oikawa’s girlfriend”

Being known as that, at first you didn’t mind, since being attached to the Oikawa name in any aspect was something to brag about (especially when you’re a teenage girl.)

But as you got older you didn’t want to be just somebody’s “girlfriend,” you wanted to be Y/N The doctor or Y/N the lawyer, journalist or whatever.

And Oikawa wasn’t particularly fond of the idea.

As the time went on, with you now studying and preparing for your new found dream job (which you were over the moon about.) Oikawa became unbearable, late nights out, always hiding his phone when you were about, he had this odd scent about him one that was different to usual.

He was cheating on you. You knew it, but since there was no physical proof and because you loved him so much accusing him of such a thing could ruin everything.

You didn’t need too though. Since one night, when Oikawa was supposedly meant to be at an away game. He was away, but in someone else’s pants... in your bedroom.

After being caught he pleaded for you to hear him out and when you wouldn’t he said “if only you supported me like she did then I wouldn’t be cheating on you”

That was definitely the final straw, you became the best doctor that Japan had ever seen, and you didn’t know what happen to Oikawa and that girl.

You may of heard through the grapevine that she definitely cheated on him a month into their relationship, but what do you care anyways.

Kenma: “gosh y/n I’m not your therapist”

Kenma and you were childhood friends before you started dating. You were two peas in a pods.

You worked perfectly as you being the talkative one always talked and him being quiet just always listened.

That’s how you worked and it was fine, right?

Well of course it wasn’t, well at least till when you were a few years into your relationship it wasn’t. Kenma was obviously a popular gamer and kind of a businessman, he wasn’t as free as he used to be and neither were you and you both knew that.

So when you did have time to hang out you most certainly made the most of it, doing what you normally did: you talk, he ‘listens.’

Even though Kenma wasn’t listening anymore, who knows when he stopped listening but he probably hasn’t heard nor cared for a thing you’ve said since you were 5.

“Gosh Y/N I’m not your therapist” he said after you were telling him about a terrible day you had “ I don’t even know why we’re still together, or together at all... “

“Fine, if that’s how you feel I’m gone”

“Wait Y/N I didn’t mea-“

You slam the door blocking out the rest of speech which you didn’t need to hear since obviously ‘you aren’t his therapist.’

Akaashi: you’re just too much of an idiot too understand.

When you and Akaashi met, it was in one of your classes, and you first noticed him when he was answering in a question in class.

Hot and smart was what you thought when you first laid eyes on him

What you didn’t know by the time you got together was that ‘hot and smart’ translates to the biggest patronising mansplainer ever.

Akaashi has a way of belittling you and dumbing you down, you didn’t know why he was doing it. Heck, you didn’t know he was actually doing it until he actually said “you’re just too much of an idiot to understand.”

The other times it was subtle, but obvious enough to leave you sad and uncomfortable afterwards questioning every aspect of yourself.

One night, you don’t tell him what your doing, you pack up your crap leave the rest of the months rent on the kitchen counter along with a note saying ‘I’m breaking up with you,’

You knew that sooner or later that day you’d get a text from him and you did which read:

Akaashi: what do you mean I’m breaking up with. Why ?

Y/N: oh I guess you’re too much of an idiot to understand.

Kageyama: you don’t work hard enough Y/N

You were dating the best setter in Japan. It always felt surreal when you said that to yourself, or when someone said that to you.

Since ‘how could you’ get ‘someone like that.’

That was the question that many people asked, since of course ‘Tobio Kageyama was only worth the best of the best,’ and to them you most certainly wasn’t that.

You got comments like that all the time online, but you didn’t care but one time you were scrolling through Twitter and so a post about you and the comments were all talking about your body.

This crushed your heart, as the comments they were making were vile so this definitely hit a tough spot.

When Kageyama came home and saw your distressed state he rushed to your side to see if he could help. However once you showed him what you were crying over, his tone of voice changed as he said,

“They aren’t wrong Y/N, ever since we got together you’ve definitely not really been looking after yourself lately”

“What is that supposed to mean” you retort

“ I mean, you don’t work hard Y/N, you don’t work at all... as of lately you’ve just been bitching and complaining and mooching off of my success whilst you let yourself go.”

Ouch.

“If that’s how you see me, then so be it” you say gracefully standing up and exciting the building. You were done with Kageyama and you both knew that, there was no going back after what he said, especially since you could tell he was thinking that for a while now.

Sugawara: your not the girl I fell in love with

Sugawara and you were described as the “perfect couple” by people that didn’t know you. Which you always faked a smile a compliment, knowing certainly well you weren’t.

You’ve loved sugawara ever since you met him in your first year. But you knew, you always knew he didn’t love you back.

Kiyoko Shimuzu, her name was. A pretty name for a pretty girl. All the boys were in love with her (some more vocal about it then others) but sugawara even though he wasn’t shouting his love from the rooftops, you caught the looks of adoration he gave her when she was simply walking by.

You dated him anyways, maybe he could sense your desperation or maybe he needed a distraction. You didn’t know why he decided to ask you out and you didn’t care, he was yours and you finally ‘won.’

Well you were winning up till you got a certain invite in the Mail:

You are invited to the wedding of Tanka Ryunnsoke and Kiyoko Shimuzu.

Even though sugawara looked happy at the idea of his two dearest friends marrying, you could tell he was heartbroken. And he knew that you knew.

That is why, on the day before the wedding as you were packing your bags to go, it turns out he was packing his bags too. But for a completely different reason.

“I’m leaving” was all he said at first heading for the door.

“Where? Why?” You aksed

“You know why Y/N, you’ve always known why And itll do more harm then good if we keep this charade up any longer”

“But I love you” you cried latching on to him

“And I love you, but you were not the girl I fell in love with and I don’t think that love will ever stop”

You knew he was right and you let him go, crying over your one true love.

An: I kinda heavily like this one, (maybe because it’s hard to write on my phone and this style is definitely not what I’m used too so I’m appreciating my efforts.) what do you guys think ??

ALSO MY PHONE WONT LET ME DO READ ORE AND ONCE MY LAPTOP WORKS TOMMOROW I WILL DO IT SO SORRY!!

Taglist[bold can’t be tagged]: @sakuxxi @iimoonii @hamdehlesmis @Shoyosupremacy @meadowsinjapan @iambashfulperson

[butwhatifidothis]

On the note about how claudes writing in hopes is just fucking horrific and well feels pretty racist. i just did not like how they enforced the whole "he's actually a schemer therefore he's a backstabbing asshole" on not JUST a brown character but a brown character who's inspiration is from west asia aka the middle east which its a pretty standard stereotype used in the west

this is gonna go slightly personal but i myself am middle easterner by birth and three houses claude felt like a breath of fresh air on a more positive depiction of a west asian inspired character (even though i was kinda curious if he rlly was super sus or not lol) and then seeing he's willing to call out almyran bandits who are posing as the navy in alois and shamirs paralouge just felt. nice yknow that hes gonna go and tell to their faces that "your pillaging and plundering is the reason why we're getting shit on" and he's not a bloody conquerer and more "ok i just want people to get along and not be judged from where they come from" and hes more neutral between the two lords in a sense like it just FEELS NICE because i live in a region that 2/3 of the place is in SHAMBLES and we rarely get positive rep in media. and hes kinda the reason how i slowly started to embrace my culture after years of internalized racism. plus theres some aspects in his design, his real name 'khalid' and the instrumentals of his theme "golden deer and the crescent moon" just felt so familiar to me (plus adding nader whos name means rare or unique in arabic and he just looks like how i imagine gilgamesh would look like in an anime lol its kinda funny)

so you could imagine how fucking appalling it was for me to witness this shit in golden wildfire. like "yeahhhh lets make him out of character and make him sort of appease the empire and collaborate with them" like this ALREADY gave me bad vibes. like ok im fine with him making treaties and plans that could be risky. thats how strategies goes. but going on and try to invade another nation because you forcefully want them to surrender someone you want to get rid of because itll end the war apparently. thats not the man who said something about wanting change but does not agree on CONQUERING AND UNNECESSARY BLOODSHED . like ok i get he might not like rhea too much at first but he couldve just what he does best in three houses is probably idk TALK HER ON WHY FODLAN IS SO ISOLATIONIST??????!?. like im trying to like some aspects thats making him slightly different but i just CANT. dont get me started on how dirty almyras been portrayed in hopes. like i can acknowledge VW having writing issues (its my first route and i still enjoy the interactions) but having GW as your first route because haha im biased was just "ok so we can just. oh. OH NO". and before anyone goes around saying this means i hate edelgard. i dont. nor do i adore her. im pretty neutral about her (gasp this almost sounds completely impossible to some knuckle heads) but i feel like there was prolly some restraints to her writing. and i DESPISE this fandom when they try to say "oh if you like claude like this then you like dimitri" or "oh if you like claude that way then you like edelgard".

how about shut the fuck up and enjoy the fact hes trying to be different than the two because there are claude fans that like both dimitri and edelgard and others just dont care because its not their business. stop thrusting us into this dumb shit like we're just a status type to be harassed for these two characters. theres so many other things i wanna say but frankly im too tired

anyways this was long so tldr; claude deserved better. thank you for coming to my ted talk

It's just. Not good.

Like I said, I always try to give writers/creators in general the benefit of the doubt when something like this happens, since it's entirely possible that they weren't aware of what exactly it is they're writing. But that doesn't mean that the end result still isn't something that, bare minimum, is very upsetting to the groups of people involved. I’m so sorry that Hopes made you so uncomfortable, after 3H had finally given a character that deviated from such shitty tropes.

Because, like, say what you will about Almyra's writing in 3H - how they weren't fleshed out, how they already had some uncomfortable aspects to them (like invading for literally no reason) - but at the very least they didn't actively engage in pillaging. That was never once implied to have been something that they did, so the fact that Hopes just randomly throws that into the mix is... Not Good. Very Bad, in fact. Especially when combined with Hopes lack of any mention whatsoever about the Gonerils taking Almyran soldiers as slaves to work for their household (and the abuse the Almyrans suffer while being there), and when combined with how it’s a Fodlan (white) character who has to tell the naughty little Almyran to not plunder. Say what you will about 3H's depiction of Almyra and how untouched it was, that doesn't mean that Hopes had to make the Almyran King so incompetent at his job as to be genuinely dangerous - literally anyone with Nader's favor could manipulate him into signing off anything they want like Clyde does. Shahid is an entirely new character! They had all the free reign in the world to make Shahid damn near anything (within reason), and they make him... a stupid, power-hungry, violent invader. And nothing else. Again, "attribute not to malice" and all that, but to straight up ignore the troubling new additions Hopes gives to Almyra - some, again, with NO backing from 3H to explain them at all - isn't the right way to go about it either imo.

I've talked at extensive length about the absolute character assassination Claude went through in the majority of the game, but holy fucking shit am I with you on that stupid take. "The only people who hate Hopes!Claude/think Hopes!Claude is OOC are Dimitri stans" because apparently only Dimitri stans are able to see Claude's lack of curiosity or intellect, or how his newfound proclivity to use violence first and thinking second is diametrically opposed to how he ever acted in 3H, or the inherent contradiction in "Claude's goals are to better foreign relations, now watch as he actively uses and worsens Faerghus' foreign relations with Sreng for his own gain," or how him bringing up the war between Faerghus and the Alliance that happened centuries ago as an excuse to invade Faerghus now is ANOTHER thing that literally completely goes against the entire point of his character. Claude fans would of course obviously no-brainer know that these mutually exclusive traits between his 3H and Hopes renditions could totally for-realsies surely coexist and be consistent.

Although, ngl, I myself have said that it's mostly Edelgard fans that like this rendition of Claude. Not that there's no way a Claude fan couldn't at least find some things to enjoy about Hopes!Claude, but that it seems that a laaaarge majority of his fans are people who prefer the lady lord over him. And, well, it makes sense considering that a big thing a lot of Edelgard fans - not even just stans tbh - tended to do with Claude is just make him Edelgard's snarky yes-man who just mindlessly believes whatever it is she says... and, well, Clyde is either just a snarky yes-man to Edelgard who just mindlessly believes whatever it is she says, or he's getting chewed out/killed for going against her. Unless it's AG! ...where by the time Claude is having any part in the story Edelgard is no longer the actual threat anymore and is just a puppet of Thales. In the route where he doesn't ever actually directly confront her at any point. Clyde is almost a typical case of how Claude would be written in, like, an Edel///claude fic or something like that.

Man am I so glad for those leaks because if I had gone into GW completely blind like I intended to then OOF I would’ve been incomprehensibly pissed. Not just at the OOC writing, but, just, everything about it, once the second part hit - KNOWING about what happens with Faerghus and Sreng didn’t make actually sitting through it any more bearable, just because Clyde and the GD in general were such massive fucking penises to the people they were LITERALLY INVADING AND KILLING THE PEOPLE OF, so diving in without the heads up might’ve made me spontaneously combust. Without even going into how utterly against Claude’s character it is to do that in the first place, or the not-lowkey racist aspects of how certain things were handled, GW is such a sludge to play through if you’re paying even an iota of attention to the story.

I can definitely get the frustration in getting kinda the tug-of-war treatment from the fandom lmao, where Claude isn't so much Claude than he is "like Dimitri" or "like Edelgard" in this-or-that way. Now, I certainly understand - and partake in - the occasional comparison, just because there are some ways Claude is akin to/different from Dimitri and Edelgard that are genuinely interesting to me. But, like, to use your phrasing as an example: there's like, literally 0 people who ever say "if you like Dimitri in this way you like Claude." The other two aren't ever used as, like, a barometer or some shit to gauge whether you like Claude, while that is in fact how Claude ends up being used in the fandom a good bit of the time. Cuz apparently you can't, just, like, be a Claude fan or anything lmao.

In general Hopes made it... not the most fun to be a Claude fan :/ Glad I could give ya a place to vent because I know that there’s a lot to vent about lol

[broken-heroes-and-potatoes]

Hey, this may seem dumb and all but like can you have any of the bakusquad members comforting their reader after they faced some boy problems. I think itll really cheer my up. It’s all good if not :)

@teerama It’s not dumb at all, I’am sorry for the late reply I hope it’ll help you feel a little much better ♥ Your admin here is totally insomniac so if you want to talk about it, my private messages are open, Stay Strong! ♥

The news broke and stroke you like a dagger in the heart, this guy you’ve trusted, this relationship you put so much energy and effort in came crashing into pieces in front of you.

You didn’t know how to react nor what you were feeling, he was definitely a bastard for doing things that way and it let you, frustrated, devasted maybe angry if you dig enough under the layers of sorrow.

Anyways, there weren’t a lot of solution, you could lock yourself up in your room and exhaust you to the bones after hours of crying OR, you could relay on one of your friends and share the news with them..

Eijiro Kirishima - Physical comfort

- By the time you focused on what to do, a knock on your door was heard, you got up and as soon as you opened it, you fell face to face with a smiling Kirishima

- He caught you off guard, you weren’t prepared for a verbal exchange at that moment, and when his red hues stopped on your sad face, a wave of panic shook him.

- «Heeeey what’s wrong?» Oh Boi. The sound of his concern voice was enough to open the bag of your emotions and you weren’t able to hold it together, so you just hid your face in your hands and cried like a river

- He would push you inside, he hates to see you cry, slightly distraught, were you okay, obviously not, but, what happened, are you hurt, have you learn some really bad news, can he does something?

- He would give you the best comforting hug ever, letting you damp his shoulder for as long as you need to, he won’t ask anything, only passing his hand on your hair with some reassuring «Sshhhhh it’s okay, it’s okay»

- You would finally fall asleep against him from exhaustion, both of you on your bed, and he can't help but think how beautiful you look with a slight feeling of guilt to be ‘happy’ to have you in his arms even because of a situation like this.

Hanta Sero - Earful comfort

- His room is not far from yours, so maybe, you could just stop by and see if he isn't busy? That was the better thing to do. Yes.

- Hanta is a sweet perfection when it comes to listen and comfort people. He’s the one who would be the most mature and honest about the situation.

- He’s composed, thoughtful, patient and he would let you rant for hours if you feel the need to.

- He inspires trust, he’s that kind of people you tell your deepest secrets or someone you easily confy what’s wrong in your life, he doesn’t do anything to, but it’s just his reassuring nature.

- So, here you were, explaining every single details of the relationship and problems encountered, why, how, when, it took litteraly hours.

- It’s almost as if you were about to take some papers and highlighter to organize everything and try to understand what happened, discovering new stuff as if you were playing Cluedo.

- In the end, you saw the situation with a new eyes, and you distanced yourself from it helped you streamline the whole thing.

- Thanks to Hanta, who was smiling confidently at you, even if, in his head, he just wanted to hug you thight and sequester the guy for making you so sad.

Denki Kaminari - Silly comfort

- You were supposed to revise with Kaminari, but hell no it would not be possible in that state, the guy could understand, or so you thought.

- After a text saying you weren’t feeling well enough to come over, you’ll receive a plethora of messages and don’t ignore them, because he’ll reach you on every possible platforms.

- He tried a call/visio or two, but he got that you weren’t feeling like talking in person, he kept the texting to keep you company though’, he’s a lazy buns so he answered with vocals instead.

- A lot of puns to lighten the mood were used and you were grateful for the good laugh and positive energy (no pun intended) that guy conveys around him.

- You’ll both end far away from the principal topic, almost forgetting about the ache, sending silly tik toks to each other or Epic Fails compilations.

- By the end of the conversation, you would feel way better, and, sorry but, he would win. You capitulate and accept to turn on your webcam.

- He keeps a broad smile on his lips, but he doesn't ignore the pang in his chest at the sight of your puffy and dark circled eyes. Because, he would have never made you cry that way.

Mina Ashido - High Level comfort

- Best girl in the world, it’s like a mix between all of the guys above without any awkwardness.

- As soon as she heard that bastard made you cry she knocked on your door in the next fifteen minutes.

- Comfort food in hands, your favorite ones, how does she..? In the middle of the night? Neverminds.

- She wants to hear every details about it and would comments every single thing, she’ll help you write a dreadful, final message to send him that will make him cry and crawl in front of you.

- Then, If you want to talk about it, she’ll listen, if you want her to say he's a fucking asshole, she’ll, if you just feel like chilling and don’t think about it, no problem!

- You’ll spend the night together, gossiping, with silly movies you both know by heart playing in the background.

- Wanna scream and dance on the bed like crazy? She puts on the radio ignoring the complaints of the neighbourgs.

- Wanna go out and took a midnight bath in the U.A swimming pool? Say no more.

- She won’t leave your side for the next two weeks, keeing you busy to change your mind. Mina would do everything in her power to cheer you up because it’s what friends do.

Katsuki Bakugo - What is comfort for fuck sake.

- No. Staying in your room crying your heart out wasn’t the good solution, but you didn’t wanted to disturb you friends with your stupid story.

- For what after all ? Hear ‘I told you so’ or ‘I always knew this guy wasn’t good’. They weren’t backbiting, but to comfort you, they could have been and you didn’t need that right now.

- The migraine was harassing your head and eyes and a boiling shower was the best thing you could think of, you hadn’t eat anything in the day neither so.. maybe a quick stop by the kitchen to grab even if only a cup of tea would be good?

- You bumped into Bakugo, of all people, and as he was about to lash onto you with a «watch your steps», he stopped mid-sentence when he saw your red eyes.

- You apologized head down and left toward the kitchen, him, he didn’t budge, watching your moves. He’s not a specialist when it comes to feelings or comfort, but he couldn’t just let you walk away in that state.

- You probably had a good reason for being like this, it was none of his buisness and he didn't care (or so he thought), but something was screaming inside of him to move.

- He hailed you, and casually asked you to join him in his room because he was about to begin a movie (a movie you really wanted to see, oh convenient.)

- He would pull out a bag of chips when he heard your stomach growl, only because HE wanted to eat some (yeah, sure.)

- He won’t ask anything, the silence was comfortable and you realized that a bit of company, his company, was really appreciable.

- When he learnt what had happen, he would keep it a secret, but confront the guy and threatened him to blow his head off if he ever talk to you again. He meant it, he would make all of the guys run away from you if it could prevent you from crying.

[kiegosbby]

hawks x f!reader

chapter 8 I think. I’m sorry guys itll get better I promiseeee

word count: 1.6k

warnings: drinking, and just making poor decisions

✁- - - - - - r- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

when you finished your work you left quickly trying to avoid talking to him any further.

You stopped at a liquor store. This wasn't your best idea. But In the moment, you needed it badly.

you never really drank before, not knowing what to buy so you bought vodka. People drink that straight right?

she bought her bottle and put it in a paper bag, having to keep her hero appearance.

she flew home and sat down on her couch. She popped the cap off and chugged it. It burned as it went down. She thought it would be worse it tasted like medicine. Kind of.

She looked across the room and saw her phone. She was now slightly tipsy, she stood up and walked over to her phone. Picking it up it was slightly cracked but it still worked. You turned it on and while you waited, chugged some more because why the hell not?

as your phone turned on you saw all the messages hawks had left you.

10+ plus new messages from: Birdy ❤️🐔

"Tch.."

Birdy ❤️🐔

Hey baby bird I'm sorry about last night I probably seem like a dick.

Birdy ❤️🐔

I had to help endeavour on a case and I couldn't say no. Please let me make it up to you

Birdy ❤️🐔

I still owe you ice cream even if you don't wanna go out anymore

Birdy ❤️🐔

Don't forget that you have to come to my agency tomorrow and fill out some paperwork and set your office up

Birdy ❤️🐔

Angel where are you? Your 10 minutes late

Birdy ❤️🐔

Angel I'm starting to worry it's been a hour. Please just let me know that your ok

Birdy ❤️🐔

Y/n please text me. Im worried and I swear if anything happened to you I'll kill someone

Birdy ❤️🐔

Don't make me go to your apartment. I will don't test me.

Birdy ❤️🐔

angel please reply

Birdy ❤️🐔

Angel? Please..

Birdy ❤️🐔

I'm about to go to your apartment. I don't know which numbers yours but I'll go through the whole building if I have to.

well now you felt like a bitch.

It was still mean for him to do that to her. But maybe she should forgive him. he apologized and he seemed like he actually cared.

You decided to call him and talk to him. Maybe apologize? Ask him what his favourite drink is. Alcohol is good you should do this more often.

you pressed the call button and took a big swig of your drink getting ready to talk.

"Angel hello?"

"Hey hawks" you slurred your words slightly. "I wanted to call you because it's so difficult to type! The buttons are so little and I keep messing up. Now I know what your thinking, she's drunk right? Well no actually I'm just a little tipsy. Oh! I forgot to say what I was calling about. I wanted to apologize, I was being a total bitch don't you think?" You took a quick swig and went back to talking "but you were kinda mean to me. But I liked you! I even bought a fucking dress for you. And I don't do dresses. Believe that? I got all dressed up for you. And you never showed. But hero duties are more important than anything" you took another swig "damn this shit is strong!"

He sat there trying to take in everything she had just said. To be fair it was a lot to handle. " Y/n your drunk why are you drinking?"

"Because why the hell not?" She said and laughed

"You want to apologize I want to apologize to face to face."

"Come over them Birdy I need some company I can't finish this big bottle all by myself." At this point you really couldn't think straight. This was 100% a bad idea but did you care? Absolutely not.

"Y/n your drunk we should talk tomo-"

"No come over nowwww pleaseeeeeeee" you whined

he sighed "Ok leave the balcony open I'll land there."

"Yay! I'll be waiting for you im so excited!"

You quickly hung up and went to wait for him on the balcony. You sat with your legs crossed and kept drinking. You got up and looked over the ledge. Damn that was a farrr drop. You stumbled a little leaning a little to far, and almost fell until you felt a warm pair of hands wrap around your waist. "Are you fucking crazy kid? Do you have a death wish?"

You started laughing "oh my god I almost fell good thing I have wings. You saved me! Your like my knight in shining armor" you smiled and went to take another swig only to have him take it away from you.

He looked at the bottle. "You drank almost half of this already! Are you crazy? Oh my god come on" he lead you inside trying to figure the layout of your house. He went into your kitchen and got you a water bottle from your fridge.

"Here drink this your gonna need it. Let's go sit down ok?" He lead you to the couch, you almost fell a couple times but with his help you made it.

"Hawksssss"

"Yes angel" he looked over to you, you were both now sitting on the couch, and he was trying to make sure you did nothing stupid.

"Thank you for coming I was sooo lonely. And I'm sorry for this morning I was being a big poopy head" you said and at the end you stuck your bottom lip out and gave him puppy eyes.

"It's no problem angel. I would always help a friend in need more matter what. And you don't have to apologize it was mostly my fault I was being a dumb bird and messed it up." He said looking at you with guilt. You felt bad honestly. But what stuck the most was when he said he would always help a friend..

"I wish we were more then friends I really liek you.." you slurred and went on "your really cute to. And your wings are so pretty I just wanna touch them. Can I touch them?" You asked already reaching out to them

"Of course baby bird just be careful you have wings to so you'll know how it feels." He pulled his wings further out so that you could reach them easily. He was a little scared only a few other people had touched his wings. And they had never been drunk before. His wings were quite sensitive, he was touch starved and that made it feel amazing when someone touched his wings.

You leaned in and touched the middle of his wings first, slowly running your hand over them. You face lit up like a kid opening his presents on Christmas. You raked your hands through his feathers.

"Your feathers are so soft! How do you get them so soft!?" You asked excitedly. Your feathers weren't as soft as his, they'd been through a lot and due to some harsh training were trying to recover still.

"There just n-naturally soft I guess are yours not t-this soft?" He asked as he was trying to keep back his groans. Your fingers felt so good rubbing against his feathers.

"They were but after bad training there not as soft anymore. Want to feel?" She asked excitedly, taking her hands away. He tried to hide his disappointment, and shook his head yes.

she pulled her wings out, giving off a soft glow as her quirk made her. He reached out to his hands. He softly touched the tip of her wings. She sat back and relaxed feeling calm at the touches he was giving her. It was way better then the little kids that tugged on her wings when she had them out.

"What kind of training did this? There still soft just seem like they've been through a lot.."

"Well it was a really rainy day. And they were working me so hard. We were in a empty field and I was paired with one of the higher ranks, so I had to try my hardest. They thought I was weak so they pushed me a little to far, until my wings were covered with mud and all the nasty shit on the ground."

He had a apologetic look on his face as he continued to stroke your wings. "Who's they?"

"I-oh I don't really tell many people but when my parents had found out I had wings, they had to report it to the government, who wanted to put me in intense training from when I was just 4. I knew how to kill someone before I knew how to write my own name correctly. I've heard you went through the same if I'm correct?" Y/n was almost surprisingly sober now.

"Yeah it's not something I like to talk about. I'm sorry they put you through that. Me and you are more alike then we seem arnt we?" He asked while taking his hand away from your wings.

you internally sighed in disappointment when he took his hand away. "I guess we might be. C-can we watch a movie or something?" She asked hoping he would stay just a little longer.

"Only if I can still take you to get ice cream soon?" He asked testing the waters to see if she was still mad.

"Of course you bird brain." She grabbed the remote and turned on  {favourite movie}.

"Oh I love this movie!" He said with excitement as he got comfortable next to you.

You smiled looking at him. You were no longer mad but thought if this went on would that happen again? Would he handle it differently? As the thoughts were running through your mind, you felt the heaviness of sleep washing over you. You closed your eyes and let it involve you.

Hawks POV

I turned to check on y/n, and as I turned she was just falling asleep. Her head slowly made its way into my shoulder. I blushed slightly. Y/n was beautiful. Even with her hair a mess she was still pretty to him.

As he was admiring her, she moved in her sleep, grabbing his arm and hugging it as she slept.

'God she's perfect'

[snow-wind-and-all-we-will-find]

Hi! My names arthur and im working on improving my word and building my story, which currently has no name haha! I have a myriad of characters who ill try to list out and give brief descriptions of, aether is technically my main character and some of the characters who are up for question are dead in canon. But you can still ask them stuff, itll just be set before death.

When asking characters questions, rememeber to include the name, their age if theres diffrent ages, i dont mind repeated questions, but if you see the question try not to ask it again lol. If you cant find it with a quick scroll just ask it, although i dont know if this blog will even get that big.

Aether

He comes in three evolutions lol, technically, theres four but idk if i would count 7 year old aether.

Ages: 13 yo - colder, hasnt gotten used to emotions, there are two to this as well, pre-rev and then post-rev 13 yo aether, remember to specify lol.

16 yo- a bit more out there, still kinda disconnected and figuring things out, a bit more defensive

22 yo- lax, hes sorta figured shit out, hes not going to go grazy, hes just gonna be chill lol.

!The gaggle Ghosts!

Yurei

Her personality is very, ehhh, becuase i havnt done work with her, and i havnt completly figured out who she is fully yet, shes 18 yo when aether is 22 yo

18 yo- pretty oblivious, somehow still a bit cynical, very nice and sometimes motherly

Kakoku

Few thousand- mean, likes to bully yurei as he huants her, lowkey a simp for yurei but he wont admit that. Kinda cynical and likes to bring others down, generally a bully

Tamashi

19- emotionless, has to be a really strong emotion to make her emote, tends to stray away from other people, likes to be alone, blunt

Gunnar

A few thousand- sweet, warm and welcoming, tries to be very fatherly and a trusted figure, is very busy most of the tiime unfortunatly though.

!The greek gang!

Argus agapov

16- unstable, pretty baby, protective over friends and family

Mythos agapov

23- whore. He also loves his family, lowkey, hes a trad wife

Perceus

15/16- timid, intrested in posiosn and acids, generally quiet, likes to eat leaves, scaredy cat

Diogenes

14- germ of phobe, kind of a brat, more just a bitch, will yell at you if he sees your hands were dirty from gardening or something while you’re walking to the sink, other than that hes fine, picky eater

Herodotus

15- disorginized, trys his best, likes to write stuff down, helps plato with his writing and grammar in general, gullible, likes record data, has a nice typewriter with tha good clicky clack

Plato

8- sweet baby boi, loves his older brother (socrates), idolizes him even, not a good idea though. He writes down everything socrates does, sometimes he imitates his brother as well.

Socrates

17- dumb of ass, also just dumb, held back a grade, feral child, bites alot of people, soft aestechic but hed stab as a warning

Heracles

30- also dumb of ass, loves cars in that ‘mah babeh’ kinda way. Hates motorcycles, he thinks they’re ugly. Chaotic but he utilizes it to be the weird and cool uncle/cousin thing

Zeus

46- too tired for this shit, is a dad, went out to get milk, jk jk, dissapeared for a hot few years, probably got captured by some gang dunno, it happens. Very serious, would make the dumbest jokes with his brothers with a straight face

Hades

50- lowkey the neglected middle child, soft goth lookin ass, loves his kid, tries his best to raise his kid, sometimes gets help from esme

Poseidon

57- proud stay at home dad, buff but does the typically wifely duties, makes sure his children get enough love, nutrience and care

Lillith

54- very active, the money maker, kinda soft, both her and her husband poseidon are so just in love with their kids, dote on them constantly, very extroverted, always makes time for her kids

Esme

51- tired of zeus’ shit, does her best to make sure no one dies, still treats mythos as her ‘little baby boy, tired mom vibes.

!the Eden gang!

Eden is a fictional country that i slapped onto the globe. It is where aether is from, technically aether is apart of the eden gang as well. Everyone here, if they have an age option, the first age option is the age they are when aether is 13, and the second will be when aether is 16 unless stated otherwise

General kyelli

49- fatherly, thinks of most of the gang as his children, calls everyone ‘son’, as a general rule. If you ask for another nickname, he will do his best. Has a bad knee, and is kinda of bad at existing physically

52+- fatherly still, loves almonds, always has a bag of almonds, dont test him. Enjoys travel, might adopt people he meets along the way, still has pains but now he sees doctors, wants to stay active

Indigo

13- sweet, optimistic, always looks on the brightside and tries to see the good in others. Little heater, understands that sometimes fighting is the only option

Akrano

16- lively, very loose and relax, can get serious when needed though, always making jokes and trying to lighten up the mood

19- a bit more, mellow. Still quite lively and childish, but with two signifigant-others you have to settle down sometimes

Ekrano

16- lively, more stern than akrano and kinda worried, but ultimatly also very loose and bright

Lilliana

16- serious, seemingly colder towards everyone, gets along great with psycho-lops, makes him new eye-patches to pass time, actually just very monotone and blank most of the time, although she does care

19- she doesnt change much, she got a bit more expressive, likes babysitting howl

Psycho-lops

16 1/2- always looks determined, actually kinda scared of conflict, likes to help out with healing though, very proficient in it as well, sounds intimidating while talking about how cute puppies and kittens are

19/20- still the same, is considering studying medicine and medical practices to become a doctor.

Bark

17- bright, incredibly lively, loves to joke around and tease and sometimes bully the others, targets aether primarily, hangs out with his brother most of the time, he can fight for himself but he likes the backup, especcially since he is kinda glass-jawed, being that hes a twig

Bite

17- quiet, intense eyes, always sounds vaugly confused when he speaks, deep voice lol, likes to train, doesnt understand barks need to tease others, likes to read to the children

20- quiet, intense eyes still, more so nervous sounding, slightly paranoid, cluastrophobic and cant stand dusty places, usually in his house or at the docks, doesnt really go anywhere else

Hanelle

17- loud, headstrong, adamant about her opinions, gets along well with bark, she tries alot to be intimidating, not a twig, but not very big, pretty friendly and sociable

!the band of pirates!

Aklea

A few hundreds of years- kinda bored seeming, loves blood, technically cannibal, but not really since he isnt human, to an extent. Despite being fine on the ocean, he gets very car sick very easily. Actually quite nice, very easily triggerd into violence, especcially by something that could be used as a good murder weapon, blood makes him jittery and more lively

Nerone

21- calm, too calm, deals with akleas bullshit wonerfully, he just stands there, blank smile on his face as aklea beats the shit outta someone, unintrested in most anything, likes to draw, but hes a much better pastry chef.

!the shakespears!

Midem(pink boi)

33- lively, loves to work with kids, very creative, likes to make things, mainly art, mainly carvings. Often make little minitures of scenes from midens writing, loves his twin, does anything it takes to fund midens intrests. Very loving to those hes close to

Miden

33- calmer by alot lmao, pretty introverted but he can hold a long conversation without becoming too drained, enjoys writing and making stories, also makes plays for fun, runs off little sleep cuase he stays up so late to write, and gets up early to write.

!gods!

Gideon

9 billion- confused boomer, loves his ‘children’, hates to be hated, always tries to help in anyway he can, despite making them, always curious into what mortals are doing, loves the universe he created and does anything he can to protect it

Merik

7 million- sore loser, does get a little salty, ultimatly bounces back and becomes a very good sport, always will adopt tactics, whatever it takes to win within the rules, keeps most all of his trophies from random feats hes done

Ventus

5 billion - calm, straightforward, tends to disregard others and do things himself, likes to sit on cliffs and watch the ocean

Kyle

Hes been around since 776 bc- very loud, lively, bright, tries his best to educate people on proper form, workout regime i intesne, doesnt allow others to take it, makes custom workout regimes for free, owns a gym, dude bro but hes nice, baby

Horo-sha

Her age technicaly is not accurate, shes like, 2 billion? Since dima was made right after her death. But since her history still lives, ima count it

5 billion but older than ventus- bitter, violent, former god of justice, fucking dead haha, hates mortals, primarily humans

Dima

Also not super accurate, hed only be a few centuries of being an active god before being sealed, but since hes technically, concious and has cognitive function hes counted

3 billion- mean lol, likes blood and gets even more violent when it starts getting messy, ‘new’ god of justice, uh, pretty bad at it like the last one, but worse, will kill over slight misdeameanors, everythings a crime smh

!misc!

Ivan

24- softspoken, from imperial russia, died young, he no longer feels his face is his own, has a mask that he likes better, has the sickness, but since he was human it killed him, can control it post mortem, is strong enough to be seen, but weak enough he can go invisible and go through solid objects.

More ocs will be added when i remember them, or create new ones, characters i dont really have built at all are not included

[mad-men-inc]

Fragments from Beyond The Stars -- Rescue.

So ya boi wrote a thing, lmao. Enjoy some Star Wars bullshit! Basically my OCs (along with togruta!Kit) in a universe ive been on and off making for like 2-3 months. Please, dear god, ask me about them and the story if you’re interested. I would kill for you :eyes:

Kit slammed the door open, the woman at the head of the table merely raising an eyebrow at the loud entrance. The man sitting two chairs to her left stood up, his hand going to the blaster hanging off his belt, but between the woman's hand wave and Kit's own blaster aimed at his face, he conceded and left through a side door, paying a single glance back to the woman.

"Kit, I presume?"

"Where's Sam." It was barely a question, the hardness in Kit's voice making it clear that they werent here to play the woman's game.

"Tut tut, little Fighter. Not even going to ask how I know?"

"I know enough about you to know you pulled any intel from Sam's head, so tell me where she is before I pull the answer from yours." The response was growled, and the woman.. laughed. She tilted her head back, elegantly, and laughed to the ceiling.

"Oh, that's precious! You have just the fire I expected you to- you're just like she described." Her tone was mocking, teasing, light. Too fucking light. Kit fired their blaster, right for her cocky fucking face, but she held up a hand and stopped the laser in midair, halfway between her and Kit.

"Now, now. That's just rude," the joking tone gave way to offense, and the laser fell to the table's surface, sizzling out. "Play nicely or I'll have my men kill your little girlfriend."

Kit growled lowly, any fear at facing a Force user snuffed out by the threat to their friend- leader- partner. Still, they took the message, holstering their blaster and crossing their arms over their chest defiantly. A knife settled into each hand, slipped from the wrist guards they wore. "Fine. Take me to her."

The woman stood up, her hands resting delicately, balancing on her fingertips, against the table's surface. "Why would I do that, when it's more fun to keep you in suspense? She cried for you, you know," she circled the table, closing the distance between herself and Kit, one hand trailing over the table next to her. "She screamed and begged for you to stay away. To let her die, so you could stay free. Unfortunately, you didnt get the message-" a mocking pout "-apologies about that."

Kit didnt believe this woman, no matter how much that sounded exactly like their Sam. They wouldn't believe a word she said.

She continued, before they could interject any protests though. "I silenced her of course, dont worry. Couldnt have her scaring you off, now could i?" She was closer than Kit would like, her free hand coming up to flick at the tip of their montrals.

Kit finally uncrossed their arms, both hands shoving towards the woman full force. The blades sunk into her sides, the woman shouting and sending a Force wave into Kit. They flew backwards, through the door they had left open. The knives remained in the woman's sides.

They stood upright against the wall, ignoring the pain in their back, as they moved down the hallway. They opened every door searching for the woman they came for, their team leader, their fucking girlfriend, finally finding her in a tiny closet-like room that had become a makeshift cell, at the end of the hallway.

Kit's hands found her shoulders, helping Sam sit upright. As soon as she saw Kit's face, she started crying, shaking her head frantically.

"Go, go go go, go, get out of here, go-" she was begging, the words almost incoherent with how slurred and soft they were. Sam was.. out of it. Her eyes were unfocused and she was hardly breathing, she was covered in bruises and cuts and burns, she looked like she had barely eaten anything with how much thinner she was-- and she was trembling in Kit's hold.

They shook their head without a word, untying Sam's hands and easing her up with the wall as support."We have to go, Sammy," Kit was trying to hide their frantically beating heart, keeping their voice steady and level.

"Cant- cant, we cant, im- i cant go-" she was crying, shaking her head more, her chest was jerking with silent sobs that was followed by a flinch every time.

"I dont care if you cant walk, I’ll carry you, we have to go," Kit was getting nervous, glancing behind them at the doorway before slipping their arm under Sam's legs so they could scoop her up.

"Bomb- im- I'm a b-bomb, I cant go, its-- distance, I can't, I cant- Kitty, you have to go, please, please go-" her shoves were weak against Kit's chest and arms, but they got the point across well enough.

They stood upright anyway, keeping hold of Sam. "What's the range?" They moved out to the hallway, treading carefully as they waited for the answer.

"Wh- about the ship size, dont- cant leave it, she said- said itll kill anyone in 15- 15 feet, its tied to the- core. Core, core, if we break it-"

"You two arent breaking anything." Eliza spoke from behind the pair, Kit turning on their heels to face her. She was holding one arm across her sides, her other hand holding a lightsaber to the side. The weapon was off, but Sam's breath still caught and she started shaking, pressing against Kit tighter.

"Drop me and run- I've got her, please go-" she tried to tell Kit, but the togruta didnt pay her any mind. They ducked into the room that was beside them quickly, slamming the door behind them with their foot.

The room looked just like the one they had found Liza in before, so they ran for the side door and sprinted down the new hallway. The comm link on their wrist beeped once, Sam reaching over and activating it with a shaking hand.

"Kit, what's the story?" Evan's voice filtered through the device, Sam nearly sighing in relief. The gang was here to help. Maybe they did have a chance..

"I need you or Jason to pull up the schematics. There's a ranged bomb on Sam- we have to blow the core if we want to get her out of here alive." Kit spoke evenly, looking around them for some kind of sign that they were going the right way towards the core of the ship.

"Can never be easy with you fuckers, huh?" Jason spoke up, his voice riddled with amusement. He didnt wait for a retort, immediately setting about calling directions for Kit to take. 

The pair were lucky in avoiding trooper patrols, and Liza had seemingly fucked off, so they arrived at the core drive quickly. Kit set Sam down by the door, giving her the comm link while they fished through their backpack for the explosive devices they always carried now. Too many times had they come in handy, for them to forget to bring a few.

Sam took the blaster from Kit's side, her grip strong but her aim shaking as she pointed the weapon at the door. If anyone walked through it, they would be dead -- probably.

Soft beeps echoed through the room as Kit placed the devices, all synchronizing with their detonator. They would need to get out of there first, get to their own escape ship before setting this place on a path to hell.

The door slid open, Sam opening fire until a strong Force had her finger stilling on the trigger. Kit ducked behind the massive core, cursing silently as Eliza strolled into the room and disarmed Sam. She wasnt holding her sides anymore, and Kit realized she had probably taken a hypo-syringe; she was fucking healed.

Sam trembled in the hold, immobile and hating every second of it. Eliza hummed, the same tune as always- Sam flinched and immediately squeezed her eyes shut as her whole body tensed up.

"That'a girl. You know it was very dumb of you to think you're getting out of here. And your actions.." the lightsaber ignited, Sam whimpering quietly as the red light flickered over her face. "Have consequences. Open your eyes, Samantha. I want you to watch this one. I want your little partner to watch this one."

She was cocky, far too cocky, and Kit snuck around the core to get closer to her. She wouldnt fucking touch their Sam any more- except she did.

The blade rested on Sam's side, right where one of Kit's knives had gone into the woman, and their breath hitched. Sam was lucky her goal wasnt to kill her. Or.. was she?

She shrieked, her muscles straining under the Force hold- she wanted to get away, to move, to run, to something, anything, but she was just as helpless now as she had been when she was first fucking taken.

"And what a shame it is theres nothing you can say to stop me this time. I don't want your information anymore. I want your fucking screams." And scream she did, as the laser was finally lifted up, only to be pushed against her other side.

Kit flinched at the sound, before sucking in a breath and moving to get behind the woman. They ran at her quietly, yanking her backwards so the blade left Sam. As soon as it was off, they jumped on her back and fought to drag her to the ground.

Liza slammed her back against one of the core relays, Kit wincing but not letting go. Their arm wrapped around her throat, pulling tighter as the pair fought each other off.

Finally, Liza snagged Kit in a force hold, throwing them off of her back- they slid across the ground and stopped next to Sam. Sam, who was able to move but still stuck frozen. Terror and pain clashed with their desire to protect her partner, and her trembling hands were of no use. Kit seized up next to her, as Liza got her bearings right.

Sam recognized the straining of their muscles, the same way hers would move when she was fighting off the Force. She had to move. 

Liza was coming closer, her hand closing around the hilt of her lightsaber. Sam had to move. She had to move. She had to move- the blaster was in her hand, she pulled the trigger and nailed Liza in the shoulder, the woman yelling in pain and outrage. Her grip on Kit released, but she was close enough anyway that she sent her boot straight into Sam's stomach, the girl doubling over and coughing.

"Bad. Dog." She growled, and Sam yelped as another well-aimed kick landed on her already broken ribs. Another, aimed at the fresh burns on her sides. She curled up, shielding her face but otherwise letting the Sith hurt her. Her chest jerked with sobs, and soft apologies filtered from her lips, muffled by her arms.

Kit had snatched up the blaster and gotten out of the way as soon as Liza had let them go, horror stilling their hand as they barely heard their girlfriend apologize for saving their life- what had happened here..? Did they even want to know?

They shook their head, firing twice into Eliza's back. The woman fell forward with a cry, her body curled over Sam's.

Sam sobbed and trembled and stilled, waiting for someone else to move first. Liza wasnt dead, of fucking course she wasnt, but she would be soon enough anyway. Kit holstered their blaster again, pulling Sam out from under the bitch. She flinched but stayed quiet, her eyes shut tight and her face pressed against Kit's chest.

Together, they ran, getting farther from the core and closer to the hangar that Kit had gotten in through. It passed by in a blur, Sam dazed and afraid, so much smaller than Kit was used to in every sense of the word. She was quiet and curled in on herself, she was thin and shaking, pale and... afraid. She was afraid.

That was... new. Not new, not really, Kit had seen her more afraid when it was their life on the line, but this was a terror that didnt go away, that left a haunting look in Sam's eyes and a bad taste in both of their mouths. This was a fear that would follow her, they were sure.

The little ship that they called home (more of a home than the Resistance base anyway) picked them up with a quick fly-by, Kit and Sam landing hard on the loading ramp as they lept to safety. Jason helped them inside, Kit setting off the explosives just before they flew away. Sam shook harder as the explosions sounded behind them, her wide eyes never leaving the hangar door, unblinking and unmoving.

They flew away for a few moments, waiting for the hyperdrive to warm up and prepare (and likely making sure Sam wasnt about to explode), before they jumped to light speed. Sam finally, finally blinked and looked away from the window, as the white lines that would be stars passed by, slowly making her dizzy.

JA-K13 scanned her for injuries as soon as she turned, the robot giving a false sigh and muttering about not being able to fix this mess, before he set about getting her to sit down so he could try and do exactly that.

Kit sat by her side, their eyes roaming over the tons of wounds that they knew would only get worse if they didnt get back to base soon. Sam needed a real medibay..

Sam, for her part, pretended as if everything was okay. She faked a close-lipped smile, her ever-shaking hand resting on top of Kit's between them. Neither spoke.

Neither wanted to discuss what had happened back there. But Kit couldnt look away from the tear tracks running over Sam's cheeks, and Sam couldnt stop seeing flashing images of Kit, dead at their feet, the blaster in her own hand and smoking.

Kit knew they were lucky to escape alive, but Sam wasnt sure they truly had escaped. After all, the past always caught up, didnt it? And hers was especially persistent.

[shiro-0197]

Oh I'm glad you got to rest more today tho!! Are you feeling okay this morning?? HAPPY INDEPENDENCE DAY!!! Will you be doing anything special to celebrate it?

Fan-Haikyuu team? (I may just be dumb, but is that when you think of actors who fit the Haikyuu characters?😭😭😭I'm probably wrong but that sounds really cool) I'm just taking a short break from work, and I'll continue again in a while ^-^

in that case I sincerely hope you have something every morning :] (question: rice or noodles??) Oh I see!! I don't drink milk with my tea... I've never tried it because my mom always says tea is better without milk (but maybe that's just her 😝) but I love green tea the most.

aaah that's just so precious. And yeah the mbti test was pretty hard for me too, but I like my classification a lot. It sums me up perfectly, now that I think about it.

YOUR QUICHES ARE PROBABLY TO DIE FOR ISTG. Pizza's are also a good way to sneak cheese in! I made some yesterday for dinner and I'm pretty sure I used a lot more cheese than needed xD but oh well, cheese is bae 😼🤚

omg your parrot sounds ADORABLE! What's its name? And ksjdksks yes toads are very cute too :> they're like creatures mostly found in fairy tails, so I find that nice. But yes, in general, all animals are perfect and deserve love :) my club's logo is a lion, so I kinda like lions too (they're just big cats with pretty hair tbh)

You're tempting me to not do it, sir— 😼

omg noooo I'm sobbing that's fullproof istg. But yeah smh amateurs :] were the stories any interesting, or was it just school books related to the syllabus ? We don't have that here tbh we just have the literature components to our language studies, and that's the only books they make us read (but everyone buys the summary from bookshops so no one ever reads the whole book anyways)

thank you for reminding me, my precious cookie, I'll certainly keep that in mind and take more frequent rests :) I hope you do the same too, and smile often!! (I'm sure you have the prettiest smile), and of course, a wonderful day ahead.

AKDBDLSBDKSK NOOOOO SCIENCE PUNS I'M MELTING. 😝That's so cute, because you're Hydrogen; my number 1 !!

Love you love you LOVE YOU!

—Ari

Hey hey!! I'm feeling great, I've had a headache since the pillow said "fuck you" and somehow got messed up, but I took a pill and had a drink, and ow I'm better:D Thank youu!! I'm not sure I will, since my mom is going to a relative's birthday and im gonna stay at home alone, so might as well just make myself grilled cheese while watching Netflix. But, if i were at school right now, we'd definitely have a festival (or as close as we can get to a festival, considering the school's budget) or something similar to that, hehe. The school really made a huge deal out of holidays. I really miss it sometimes, cuz it never feels like a holiday at home, even during new years:/

Ohh, I meant like, creating original characters and shoving them all into the HQ universe and making it a team. Lemme show you the least of the team members xD

We're still working on the staff and the leftover characters' designs. I made school and volleyball uniform, but they dont look great so I'll probably work on them more!!! Me, Kuro & Liza (the friend) are making it, with Kuro being the main artist and Liza creating the characters. I'm responsible for the stuff. It's pretty fun. Hahah, sorry for rambling like that, it's like a personal passion project, and it's the only productive thing I can do while having fun, so I'm very happy about it~

I really love noodles♡ anything related to noodles is my favorite. If only you'd see me freaking out when I see spaghetti on our school menu XD I wish we got to make noodle soup more often. I love it so much😭

I only prefer rice when it's really spicy. I love spicy stuff a lot, and plain rice/rice soup feels really weird and my picky ass doesnt like it. I also love Pilaf (we call it plov here), it's not always spicy but it still tastes good😝

Oh, I think you should try it! It's really good, kind of plain but still nice. I'm really picky about my tea and I havent drunk any good tea in ages, but I remember a really nice cafe that served PERFECT green tea. I miss it😩 It was when I went on a school event, we got to roam around the city (with the teachers of course, because most have no idea where they are haha), and I visited that cafe, and I absolutely loved everything about it.

OH YEAH, but pizzas are really thin and get eaten fast, while quiches and pies are more fulfilling XD that's just me probs but still~

Ahhh, my parrot's name was Molly! Though only after her death I realised that it was indeed a "he", which was awkward. But the shopkeeper said it's a girl, and we were uneducated, so it's not our fault XD it was the cutest, tbh. It loved running after my pens when we played on the table. Sadly, my disgrace of a father kept reopening the front door in winter and overfeeding it when I wasn't home, so the parrot passed away:( one more reason to hate the old man, haha~ dont worry, I'm over it :D

Omg!! Lions, lions are so wonderful🥺🥺 Our school logo is a bird,

Hopefully it's visible. The pic is transparent, sorry for that XD

The stories weren't the best. There were children's turkish books, a few kazakh classics, a Harry Potter book (I hadnt gotten a chance to read or watch them, but after the Rowling situation I kind of lost any wish to somehow associate with the books) and honestly the Russian ones were the only readable ones:D (also, what little cheaters they are XD tbh our guys probably would do the same)

I'll try my best to smile whenever I can~ itll be easy if i just keep you in mind, shortcake;D

Ohhh that one is adorable!! I love you muchh😭🥺💕💕

[mingi-bubu]

Watch “Youth With You” with Me!

Episode 9 Part 1

heyyyyy guess whos back at it again at krispy kreme

i have my water, i have my grapes, i have my m&ms, its currently some how 99F / 37.2C outside which is a sin

here we go!!!

so last episode it was the mid-way thru practice eliminations

and we’re starting the episode out with seeing the boys be dumb but also openly and loudly sobbing

i hate it here (:

there’s like no one for maze, only 2 people

im still excited tho bc huaiwei’s stage is good.

and zhanyu looks good

and we were given a sneak peak into the ranking results and wenhan was chastized

tinder

i think that’s what huaiwei and linmo and zhanyu’s stage is called

anyway im getting ahead of myself

i spent most of last night watching the stages adkfljas

ok so we start out with one of the senior seniors’s classes

theres a baby grand piano in the classroom and teng shichu is leading adkfa

he was like im really excited to see you guys again awww T.T

aals;dkjfa why does linmo look so embarrassed to say he listens to pop music ldkfja

god whoever did yao chi’s hair and eyebrows

thank you

junjie’s face at tsc’s story i love it

zhanyu is babieeeee

also side note to this if you havent watched his introduction video yet you have to

you will understand why when you do

tsc’s namedropping left and right but i dont have the cultural background of knowing who these people are so uhhh,,,,moving on

youwei has been wrecking my unine bias hard recently

love to see it

@baobeejun probably doesnt like waking up to 20+ messages of me screamign but its fine

mingming is sitting next to wenhan ugh the visuals

oh

oh wow

that uhhhh

that is definitely a picture from the 70s or 90s i would guess

the characters on the screen probably say something relavant to it but as we all know i am illiterate

shiyuan is effortlessly beautiful and i personally think thats very sexy of him

i need to stop talking to ash

the increase in the amount of times i use the word “sexy” in everyday life is disturbing

xixi looks so tired and yangyang is as always looking like hes 2 minutes from passing out

god i wish these boys could rest

xu longhan

thats it

thats the note

mingze and zhenning sitting next to each other we love bg project boys

also shenshen pretty

i learned about “flight of the bumblebee” back in like 4th or 5th grade but now im relearning about it

thank you teng shichu

wang zhe looks like he wants to die alkdfjaslkjd

everyone looks so dead inside at the lesson im so weak

except shiyuan

hes like hell yes i know all of this bc i play piano

shiyuan is the star student right now i love that for him

hes so embarrassed im love him

hanyu is so done with him

ugh i love it here

they’re talking about the four fantasias and how chopin composed the first (and most famous) one at the age of 24 and someone definitely choked and tried to pass it off as a cough my hand to god

not to pull the focus away from the history lesson but huaiwei resting his head in his hand is giving me a complex

god i really hope that none of the trainees ever see this

tsc is just gonna drag mesistopheles or whatever the other composer’s name was

and i support him

longhan glasses i repeat longhan glassessssss

lian huaiwei

thats it

that’s the note

“now i want to ask you a question”

weiwei immidiately: o.o’

oh my god yao chi has cookie monster on his shirt i *pleading emoji*

i might amend my shiyuanario to him playing piano or something bc i want to shamelessly indulge in the idea of him playing something for his s.o.

jDHjhfkd all the boys immediately saying hanyu can play chopin after he answered right is sending

hes like: ......fck.

“i havent played this piece in a long time” - xhy

“yeah itll be hard if you dont practice lmaooo have a try” - tsc

i love everything about this situation

shiyuan looks v happy for him tho so thats all that matters

he seems to be doing well

i love how whenever hanyu is embarrassed he bites his thumb hes so cuteeee

everyone making little piano motions is so cutee

shiyuan is fanboying we love to see it for him

tsc is telling them to expand their horizons and make sure they learn different parts

ooooh they’re gonna be planting trees!

cool cool cool

is hanhan mc-ing??

im weak af but ok

sun village is where theyre at

they’re planting begonias today

what the fuck is going on asdkfjs

jiayi is sending

linmo is so 

mr. tyger boys are certainly all share the same briancell

oh did they relaly need to put in that glamour shot of mingze walking with a bucket of water

was taht absolutely necessary iqiyi editing team

is

is the koala shope just a pop up one that they  did specifically for the dachang boys???

what the fuck is a duty-free shop?

alsdkfjalsdkjfas i cannot tell if yangyang is making fun of wenhan a little bit but i sure hope hes poking fun at his ge bc i lvoe to see it

wang yi kao la

lkfjal;kfa lian huaiwei is the love of my life i swear to god

oh snap its mr fruit without the beret

hey mr lian what the FUCK was the wink about i’ll *knife emoji*

omg wang zhe thats adorableeee

at least i think its him

they dyed his hair back, right?

mingze is That Bitch

god this is going to sound really awkward but i can just feel it in my soul that li zhenning is going to be a really hot 40-year old man

like

if he has kids and has a daughter, her friends are gonna be like *eyes emoji*

feel free to unfollow me after reading that, i dont blame you

if you think im right tho hmu and we can discuss

zhanyu looks so awkward in this but as soon as he steps on stage HOOO MAN I WHEW

alright alrigth its stage time!

oooh for once the senior seniors are actually like here in person O.O inch resitng

i personally think its really cute!

god im so excited for rebuild and tinder

ajlfkasdjf after journey and yixing’s reactions to mc jin’s chinese is soc tue

he looks so excited

i have no idea what is going on tho with the voting thing

and to be honest idrc bc voting is no longer relavant to this

tinder stage first???

YES HHHHH FUCK

MY BOYS

LOOK SO

G O O D

i hate them so much actually aldkjfs

ok training time

chaoyuan’s “wwhAAT?” is so cuteee akl;djfalksd

huaiwei is so tinie compared to him its adorable

i refuse to believe linmo is that tall what the fuck

jiayi baby i love him

oh hes the leader this time!!  and huaiwei is center

i LOVE to see it

jiayi and chaoyuan having a push up contetest while huaiwei just reclines on his hands

the dynamics in this group are hilarious to see

i know i say this a lot

but

huaiwei dark hair hhhhhhh

alkdjflkasd i screenshot this part of huaiwei’s one on one and the sentence fragment says “Jiayi is a person”

uh yeah i sure hope he is

akfj;lkasdjfsa jiayi praises people the way wenhan does

OH MY GOD WAIT

WASNT IT HANHAN WHO SAID HE LIKE PRAISES THEM LIKE THEIR KINDERGARTENERS OR SOMETHING

ALKDJFAKSJDF

big iirc

alfdjalskdfjasldkf

“even tho jiayi says deng-ge, deng-ge, he may consider me as his child”

im dying y’all

“i am a person” - lian huaiwei, 2019

i should stop making fun of them

and yet

why does huaiwei remind me of a mom oh my god

the momergies he is giving out right now dlkjalsjdf

ok ok is it time???

no

boooo

oh its huang doudou!

laksjdf;lkasjdf;klasjd oh my god

hdd: “chen tao which school do you want to go to?”

ct: “shanghai theatre academy”

hdd: “hmmm,  if you do get in you’ll be going to my wife’s alma mater”

ct: *bows*

OH MY GOD

CHEN YOUWEI IS 6′1 AND IT SHOWS

doudou is so small oh my adlfkjasd;lkfjas;kldj

wait

is the senior seniors here bc lrh, xmh, and jt arent?

bc hdd is a dancer right

and i ahvent seen the other three mentors yet

inch resting

asldklfjaskldfjasd oh my god

part of me wishes that hdd was a mentor from the jump bc his head movements are killing me

he literally looks like a confused puppy

he said the movements arent uniform

tbh i was just focused on watching my boys (lhw, cyw, zy) and i didnt really pay attention to the like uniformity of the group

jiayi is saying he should take responsibility

i love that huaiwei is only what,,,a few months older than jiayi but is moving him around and directing him like theres two years or more in their age difference

what is youwei doing alkfjslkdj

skdjlk;asjdf;klasd the two tallest in the group are on either end of the line this is loweky fuckign hilarious to see

hakdfja;s huaiweis “oohh mahy gahhh”

zhanyuuuuu

lakjsdjflaksdjf this group is so cute

oh my god theyre doing the thousand hand goddess dance i hate themmmm

alksdjfalskdj his lil clap i love jiayiiii

qjal;kdskjfWHYYYY

IS YOUWEI SO CUTE

I HATE HIM

STOOPPPPP

hes baiiibeeee

stage tiem!!!!!

HELL YEAH IM LOVE IT HERE YOU GUES

chandeliereessss

pretty boys everytwere

zhanyu can kill me

WWAHTEKA;LDFKJSA; YOUWEI AND HUAIWEI UNNECESSARY

ugh the domino moves i love to see it

yechen looks good

youwei the wink was uncalled for im going to *knife emoji*

NAAAAAAAAA

AAD;FJAKSLDJ

huaiwei in this outfit is very good

awwwwwwww!!!!  ok so one of the senior seniors said that their movements are uniform and then the camera cut to yixing looking so proud im T.T

i love huaiwei center

its a fantastic move

also i wish that we couldve seen the voting for the groups thing but i think iirc from the end of episode 8 that only like 2 groups had too many and then maze only had two people

also this song is very h*rny

like in the way that cxk’s lover and almost anything by zyx are

god zhanyu looks good

i love this outfit for him

chaoyuan oooh the shirt is a nice color on him

he jumped high damn

chen tao this is a different look for him

hasdkfas im sorry 

im literally no thoughts head empty watching this stage

zhanyu and huaiwei and youwei 

NO THOUGHTS HEAD EMPTY

none

my brain is aboslutely free real estate right now

jiang dawei did NOT just say “sex appeal is needed”

I AM SCREAMING ACTIVELY

JFAL;KDSJF;ALKSDJF

THANK GOD FOR THE TINDER STAGE THIS IS FUCKING INCREDIBLE

I AM LITERALLY 0 THOUGHTS HEAD EMPTY

LIKE I THOUGHT RETREAT WAS THE THOT STAGE BUT I WAS WRONG

THIS ONE IS

PLEASE STREAM THE TINDER STAGE YOU NEED TO SEE ZHANYU

im going to take a moment and just compliment yechen’s voice

like its very clear and nice to listen to

i hope hes doing well

oh my god zhanyu with that note im going die

im sorry huaiwei but im proposing to zhanyu

god he really stood out in this stage

damn

this was a good stage you guys

this was a good

awww weiwei’s lil wink at the end!!

zhanyu

“they showed men’s elegance” mhmmm sure that’s what we’ll call it jiang dawei

men’s elegance

ok but like even without me losing my mind over the “needed sex appeal” it was a really good performance

they were very in sync with each other and even tho the moves were slower than other stages we’ve seen up to this point, they still were very powerful

part of me, a really small part of me, wants to learn the choreo for it alkdjfslk;

ok awww now the boys are going to say something about their hometowns i think!!!

ooohhh theyre gonna say like some nice touristy things about their hometowns for people to go see!!!

thats so cute!

yoooooo chenyuan’s recommendation is v cool looking i would lvoe to go there

oh god thats really prettyyyy

bean jelly ?

sweet and spicy kinds thats so cool omg

i really want to go hhhhh

ok jiayi’s turn

i know they said their hometowns out for god and everyone but like idk i still don’t necessarily want to say them again

plus if you really wanted to you could google it

so yeah

anyways

jiayi’s turn

him and zhanyu are from the same hometown!  cute cute cute

YOOOO THESE MOUNTAINS ARE DOPE AS FUCK

aww i think he spoke in dialect or something

this is really fucking cool tho oh my god

mountain sanqing

lkjasdl;kfjasd what the fuck was that noise zhanyu

:((( i kinda wanted to hear what youwei and huaiwei have to say about their hometowns

like the four in the group who got to say something (chenyuan and yechen are from the same area) looked really proud and excited to talk about it

maybe its on the youtube or somethign

im like 90% sure youwei was chanting his hometown and province but im too lazy to look up where he’s from

hmm sure do wish that i could understand these slides that are talking about foods!  (:

and place to go!

ooooohhh those noodles look really good

i think someone is jumping over a fire????  what the fuck but ok

and i think that’s supposed to be tea leaves or dried mushrooms

ooooohhhh those look goooood the lil dumplings or steamed buns hhhhhh

ok next stage

i’m sorry stage

yao chi and shiyuan and hanyu!!!

oh my god so many boys i loveeee

wang jiayi and junjie also!!!

awww yao chi has elmo on his shirt adlkajsdfk

i love it wehn he speaks english even tho its just like little phrases or words here and there

also lowkey

l o w k e y

i forgot that this round of stages is like their own songs that they’re the original singers of

im so pretty

onadfkja;s hanyu smilingggg

akd;jflkasd so junjie is talking about how much hanyu has grown in terms of expressing his emotions and apparently he told junjie that after spending so much time with him and huaiwei they rubbed off on him and now hes more showing about how he smile

there was a little bubble insert of huaiwai going “as if”’ aldkjsd

“i think that single eyelids are going to become a trend” - xia hanyu, 2019

shiyuan’s turn to compliment him and hes talking about hanyu’s snaggletooth alkdj

lakjsal;skd yao chi turning and looking when hanyu laughs sends me

awwwww baobeiiii he’s so flustered by being complimented yao chiiiii

oh my god shiyuan is That Best Friend

hes like “in my mind yao chi is someone who like cheers you up and makes you happy and wont tell you when he’s sad”

i know that it’s framed as being funny but genuinely im sad that he feels like he has to go and hide in the bathroom and cry and wait until his eyes arent red

like same but still

idk i just i know im a hypocrite to an extent about emotional vulnurability but no yeah idk where i was going with this it just sucks for him

lkfjlkfjalsdf i didnt know yao chi and xixi were roommates but anyways apparently he talks in his sleep and xixi told junjie about it and now hes spilling the tea

l;akdsjf;laksdjf shiyuan “changxi also talks in his sleep”

*immediately cuts to changxi spinning on a chair*

when i tell you i choked adklad

oha fdlkajks this man holds nothing back drag themmmmm

gu landi for comedian of the year award

they’re a giggly bunch i love that for them

“of course we did something other than complimenting each other.  we work very hard tyvm”

*cuts to a montage of the trainees practicing*

*cuts to hanyu standing in the back of the room almost in the corner*

feng junjie: how am i supposed to work in these conditions

“i am not getting paid enough to deal with hanyu’s shit today”

oh my god i was just making a joke i didnt think he would actually say something similar lakdjfaklsdj

i hate the kiss noises alskjd

my love for junjie-hanyu friendship vs my love for huaiwei-hanyu friendhsip

FIGHT

stage time!!

after this im making another post bc it’s too long hadkfjasd

hanyu’s suit is really neat

shiyuan marry me

i love that their ear

YAO CHIIIII

i love that their ear pieces are taped in

yao chi date me challenge

sparkliesss

oh so it just starts out like that ok

is

is hu landi’s jacket held together by chains

yao chi shouldnt look that good

like legally how is that possible

shiyuan too

what the hell

hanyu hell yes vocal king

awww huaiwei looked so proud imemo

i like this stage a lot

wang jiayi turning the fuck up

hes so pretty in like a really gentle way T.T

god this song is pretty

i did not know that shiyuan was working on rapping

ei ei eiiiii

ei ei eiiii

god i feel like cryign listening to this song i 

this is a 180 from the previous stage

SHIYUAN DEEP VOICE BACK I LOVE TO SEE IT

HANYU HIGH NOTE KING

I GIVE HIM ALL MY LOVE 

yixing looks proud

i love to see it

IT’S SNOWING THAT SOS COUDFAOSDIJF

THATS FUCKING COOL

DOMINO CHOREO I LOVE TO SEE IT

yao chiiii T.T

annas bullying me :(

hometown time~

hanyu’s starting and he and shiyuan are from the same hometown!

adskjfaksd why did he introduce himself so formally i

bby we know who you are dkljfasdf

ooooohhhhh fuck that looks really good

every time i forget that shiyuan has studied in england he reminds me

alkdsfjasd the side eye hanyu is givng is sending me

hanyu talking about the food from home: *having to pause every few seconds to swallow bc his mouth is watering so much*

i love how excited yao chi looks about the food adflkajsd;kl

YAO CHI TURN

he has cookie monster on his sweatshirt again

*pleading emoji*

hes going to talk about a road

its got a pretty dope fucking bridge tbh idec why he wants to talk about it anymore im in bridge mode

jianguo road that’s the road

he’s lived by that road for 18 years of his life apparently

awwww he’s really close with one of his cousins and so would spend a lot of time at hers and her house is nearer to it than his

afjdlkasdjfk;la junjie just said you should be named “yao jianguo” bc of how much his person is tied to that area aldfkjasd

oh my god shiyuan stop flirting in front of my m&ms

“so all of the people from jianguo are attractive then? ;)”

“oh rly? ;)”

i hate them alkdjfaklsjd

shiyuan’s laugh is al;aksdjf so cuteee

hmmm my boy likes spicy foods huh

SCALLION PANCAKES UGH I WOULD SESLL MY LEFT KIDNEY RIGHT NOW FOR SOME THEYRRE SO GOOD

ugh i would love to go to this restaruant and get some they look so good

yao chi mc a food show 2020 pleaseeee

my man keeps promoting his town we love it

ok!!!  that’s it for part one!!!

i will see you in the next part!!!

[letstalksymphogear]

Symphogear, EP. 6

Last Time on Grand Theft Auto:

Tsubasa recovers from the world’s gayest coma as Hibiki trains her mind while putting aside such silly concepts as “the love of my life” and “literally being with my girlfriend.” After cooling Miku’s paranoia with her brand new washboard abs, Genjuro prepares the team for a pizza run across the city to deliver a dangerously hot pizza pie named Durandal. Chaos emerges as the delivery is intercepted by a rival pizza gang, lead by the nefarious Gremlin known as Yukine Chris. But, before the pizza could be claimed, dedicated pizza deliverywoman Hibiki not only steals it back, but eats it, harnessing the power of the pizza and unleashing cheesy pasta based chaos around the location.

Ryoko is so into it that she taps into her superpowers and protects Hibiki after she passes out. The delivery is considered a failure, and no tip is given.

And so, the journey continues...

Meanwhile, in this weird, tricked out mansion...

Chris meditates on some water metaphors of her own.

“that pacman colored freak took only touching it to activate a cheap ass french sword that gave her weird demon powers and its taken me YEARS to use this dumb stripper outfit and the funny cane that goes with it, what the FUCK man, what even is my life”

“maybe... maybe honeybaked hams ARE that powerful...”

“NO! turkey is the superior meat! it’s healthier, lower in fat, and way more tasty! fuck you! i’ll get my goddamned revenge!”

Chris begins musing about Fine’s motivations to capture Hibiki; during these, we’re treated to some brief image flashbacks of Chris’s life.

Suddenly, those jokes about food are a lot less funny.

It doesn’t take a genius to put two and two together as to why this young woman is helping a strange nudist dominatrix spread alien terror across the city of mumblednoises, Japan. She doesn’t really have many an option on the table. It’s either help the weird kinkster with her plans, or die.

Despite everything, she has a high opinion of Fine, for the same reasons someone might have a high opinion of a television show if it were the only show they were ever exposed to. She is deeply afraid of being alone again, because she has lived through such misery that the very thought of existing out in the cold again terrifies the shit out of her.

The Sun rises casually amidst Chris’s thoughts.

“ah shit. it just hit me. i literally have spent the entire night standing here instead of actually going the fuck to sleep. goddamnit.”

On such a devious metaphorical twist, Fine stands behind her as the Sun rises.

“yeah, jokes on you. i couldnt sleep for shit either. turns out, all nude, no blankets? in japan? real bad idea.”

“thats why i decided to GO GOTH, babey! whattaya think? do i give those witchy vibes, huh? real ‘black magic woman’ santana hours? feeling cute, gonna head out with the girls and summon satan in the woods kinda aesthetic looking shit? come on, be real with me. does this not look baller?”

“you look like morticia decided to go to the grocery store to buy some wonder bread, but other than that, its a step up from your usual pussy out attitude, so sure”

“you know i decided to get some brain cells on loan from Brain Cells R Us, and ive been thinking this solomon cane stuff is solomon lame. i dont need this dumb oversized harry potter cosplay prop to get shit done. also, murder is... sorta bad? im still trying to get the brain cell stuff down.”

“i can punch just as good as goody two shoes if not better.”

“lol go do it then champ, im gonna go cut down a forest of trees now”

And so, they both just kinda... stand there.

“QUACK, NEXT SCENE, QUACK”

Meanwhile, Tsubasa is rapidly trying to rehabilitate herself from her wounds like walking like a madman, her IV drip presumably filled with Taco Bell brand Doritos Locos Tacos super spicy nacho cheese. Taco Bell: Live Mas.

“im gonna clear every fucking taco bell in your goddamned memory, kanade”

“think outside the bun! wait, what? that was a taco bell slogan? ah fuck it, im dead. what nerd’s gonna try and correct me?”

“i would, kanade. i am that nerd.”

Tsubasa is hell bent to try and understand Kanade’s simple philosophy of helping others selflessly. Unfortunately, when Kanade died, she took all the brain cells between them in the process, so coming to this epiphany is a work in progress.

“listen its a fucking miracle you are 1. alive and 2. able to have your blood run on the garbage melted plastic taco bell tries to dupe people into believing is cheese so why dont you just lie down and think of better franchises to eat from”

“no! you dont understand! taco bell is a franchise of the PEOPLE! their meals are cheap and filling and- and the chicken quesadillas are of good quality for their price! i promised kanade- my vow to the death. taco bell... ergh... now and forever... i-”

“wait. my gay senses are tingling.”

It’s Hibiki, probably running track with Miku.

“oh yeah... her... i should probably apologize to her. about trying to kill her. and then letting her almost be kidnapped. and just giving her a general hard time about something that wasn’t explained to her in the slightest for months. she’s a good bean.”

Tsubasa proceeds to never canonically apologize to Hibiki throughout the entirety of all 4 seasons of Symphogear.

Look at em run. See, it’s a metaphor, because they haven’t communicated yet and they’re running from their problems! But they’re running towards Tsubasa, who is part of the representative problem these two share! Clearly literary genius.

It’s like someone went halfway into writing an NTR plotline and went “maybe this isn’t a good idea to market our songs on.”

Hibiki is still thinking about her Hellshake Yano moment with Durandal. Mainly how she nearly killed someone with it. Hibiki is very starkly in the “killing is bad, and wrong” camp of morality, a trait currently unique to her that she’ll wind up teaching literally everyone else she meets one way or another.

Some could argue the L stands for Lydian, and they’re wrong. It stands for Lesbian.

“that was one hell of a run, hibiki! im pooped! why dont we go to the locker room and call it a day, have a nice shower and just get some dinn-”

“this is the last straw.

i clean your plates. i cook your food. we eat, shit, shower, and sleep in the same FUCKING area, and this is how you repay me? huh? you think being your wife is easy shit, hibiki? half the damn time you’re running off like clark kent having food poisoning and the other half ive gotta babysit you, the emotional equivalent of a preteen clown, to make sure your life doesn’t self destruct harder than Atlantis sinking into the ocean. im done! i am DONE. im reopening my tinder, im slamming my ass BACK into okcupid, and im gonna date some CUTE ACADEMY GIRLS that treat me BETTER than this ABSOLUTE BETRAYAL OF HEART AND IM NOT CRYING I SWEAR ITS JUST THE SWEAT IN MY EYES AND HIBIKI HOW COULD YOU-”

“oh yeah, sure! hey, lemme just do a few more laps, ive just been feeling judgmental about myself and my figure, you know? gotta push myself further...”

“o-oh yeah, sure. no worries, ill wait for you. love you too, hibiki...”

The girls bathe together, as good friends typically do.

“hey you ever notice the showers here have like, weird psuedo-luxurious minipools to bathe in? like, how rich is this school?”

“whoever made this place is either rich or a pervert. or both, probably!”

Miku remarks that Hibiki has changed since she’s entered Lydian, in a manner most unheterosexual.

“oh FUCK you really DO have washboard abs now! ohhh my god.”

“damn, those abs were heavenly. let’s get pancakes later.”

I won’t screenshot it but something to note is that they actually wear each other’s corresponding underwear colors (or even, if you want to examine more closely, each other’s underwear). Here’s an equivalent scene to give you the mental image.

This is the face of someone who knows what they want and already have it. Such is the power of Kohinata Miku.

Meanwhile, Genjuro comes back from the funeral of the guy the Americans filled violently and with impunity.

“yo that all black look looks baller. i should borrow that look... id look pretty gothy in it.”

“ryoko i sympathize with your sharp, fashionista eye but this was for a funeral, i was paying my respects to the dead. thats the usual dress code.”

“didnt know they updated that. i remember back in my day, we just went in white garments and chanted in latin!”

“shit was fire. literally. lots of funeral pyres.”

“lmao ryoko buddy your larping sessions arent actual history”

“hey dont shit on larping around me. i used to be a professional larper while i was majoring in acting. helped really sell my career when i had to pretend to slay the Dark Lord Jyarloen atop the mountain of skulls in Hargobor after my family was killed by the Dark Army. asshole.”

“haha yeah, larping, thats cool yeah, i do that

i...

i larp.”

“oh yeah? you wanna join my larping session sometime then? we’re gonna do an ancient babylon plot thats inspired by some anime, itll be fun”

“.....................................im super into realism.”

“i know im dressed for a funeral but id like to not part ways with my dignity yet. besides, we’ve got serious shit to talk about. basically, we’re on the verge of getting shitcanned.”

As it turns out, the death of this politician removed the last obstacle of opposition to maintain the 2nd Division, as the average criticism against the 2nd Division is “why are we funding this mystery division when we don’t know what they do”. Of course, the sensible idea for an organization that defeats the Noise is to declassify it, given people of different jobs and positions have physically seen the Symphogear in action, but you know. “Oh no, the other governments will come after us” stick gets shaken.

“im in a union. i know my rights. you’re not taking my acting job here away from me.”

“im not going back to be a preschool teacher. its been ten year. the bites on my ankles still havent healed...”

“yeah man, shit sucks ass. i cant fund my adoption habits if im fired.”

Look at these cinematic parallels. Symphogear truly is a franchise made by someone living in 3030.

“worst part is the new minister is super into america. he’s a... westaboo.”

“a westaboo?”

“westaboo?”

“did he just unironically say westaboo”

“he said westaboo. oh my god. this is the hell timeline.”

“i mean people kept calling me that for worshipping all these fighting flicks so i guess it fit? i dont see the problem here”

Meanwhile, in Lydian Academy...

“so it hit me, right? we’re ALL girls. and we ALL sing. now, humor me a moment. what if... what if we’ve all been recruited to potentially be superheroes... through our singing? like, there’s no coincidence that all this shit happens around us, right? and a famous singer LIVES here? i saw the black cars outside! weird shit is happening here- im not even gonna eat the all you can eat bar anymore!”

“kathy there is literally no such thing as superheroes who sing. this place is more likely to be a organ harvesting op than whatever madness you’re saying”

“what? you need me, a singing superhero, to go stop a problem happening underneath the school, a location meant to recruit young women into potentially becoming fellow crime fighting singers?”

“yeah im too busy poppin’ caps in asses so go kick ass in my place”

“sure!”

“.....................................who ya talkin to, hibiki?”

“the boss! gotta go do a thing again...”

“hibiki, i dont like the fact that capitalism is tearing us apart.”

“you’ve gotta join me in the revolution, hibiki. you. me. luxury automated gay space communism. aint it the dream? share my vision, hibiki. its glorious.”

“n... no...? no gay space communism today? well, what about tomorrow? or the next day? or... maybe the next day? baby steps, you say? but, direction action, hibiki! we’ve gotta strike now!”

“it’s okay hibiki. when i take over the world and destroy all first world government leaders, and unite the globe in my encompassing reign and love... ill make sure to spare you, and be my bride to be.”

“thanks miku. im just not ready yet for the globe to burn in an unending ball of fire as the continents fuse into a new utopia composed of our combined wills. also, ive really gotta go, its genuinely an emergency.”

“for the cause!”

“yes hibiki... for the cause...”

Admittedly, you can see the stages of grief Miku goes through when she sees Hibiki say she can’t join her for pancakes. It’s sad. This side story sucks.

Meanwhile, as it turns out, the problem Hibiki needed to resolve was checking on Tsubasa to see if she hadn’t dissolved into Taco Bell brand hot n’ spicy Tabasco sauce.

“god, cant believe taco bell was closed. now i gotta deliver these lame ass flowers”

“cant wait to get threatened again. wonder what she’ll say. ‘hibiki, i should have killed you when i had the chance.’ or ‘you’re so goddamned weak. i could break your spine with my fingernail’, or some other stuff about metaphors. oh, my stops here”

“HEY BITCH WHATS GOOD-”

“HOLY SHIT”

“you are already”

“dead.”