#it's weird to realize we're here but I'm proud of us and wanted to share all this

[reimeichan]

Yknow what yeah I do wanna talk about that last post I reblogged.

Because I was in survival mode for so long, I didn't even realize it was survival mode even when I got out of it. My brain was so convinced for years afterwards that I was STILL in danger constantly, even though I was no longer being constantly traumatized and re-traumatized by my abusers. I thought by simply escaping I was allowing myself to heal and recover, never once realizing I never actually did the work to do such. Plus, Survival Mode had been my norm for over twenty years of my life. I didn't know anything else.

For four years after leaving that traumatic environment, I continued on as if I was in survival mode. And, well, that was what worked for me. Work was basically an extension of college which was an extension of high school, and I continued to beat myself up internally to do chores and shit the same way I would avoid being yelled at by my parents. I didn't see anything wrong with any of this. After all, I had a stable income and was no longer dealing with a toxic, abusive environment. Why did anything need to change?

Well, turns out, a lot of my old coping skills were only helping me because they were so maladaptive and hurting the people around me. My emotional dissociation made me distant and inattentive to the emotional needs of the people closest to me. My reliance on panic and adrenaline to get myself started on tasks made me unreliable to others who actually treated me like a human being. And as I slowly realized how much my past had shaped my current behavior, I became more and more aware of how different my current life and my old life were.

And that revelation felt like ripping the carpet from under me, only to find a massive whirlpool of chaos where there should have been solid ground.

It was like my eyes suddenly opened to all the trauma and grief and emotional turmoil that I had pretended did not affect me was now rushing out as a stream out into the open. I had opened Pandora's Box and couldn't close it again. My life that I had carefully cultivated quickly fell apart as I was now all too aware of just how much I hadn't actually worked through and processed. I lost my partner of 14 years, and the stable job I held for 4 years. I was a mess as I tried to untangle the mass of cobwebs in my head from decades of pushing things away, the cobwebs that feebly held me together until they no longer could.

And... slowly, I replaced those cobwebs with stronger things. Instead of ignoring my traumas, I faced them. Instead of ignoring my feelings, I let myself feel them. Instead of pretending everything was fine, I let myself fall apart, so that I knew how to better put myself back together again. I replaced the old coping skills and old behaviors that no longer served me with healthier things that allowed me to move forward. I stacked things neatly in my head where I could see them, instead of shoving them away into a corner.

And in time, I learned how to be happy.

It's weird, really. I thought I knew what happiness was. I thought happiness would have been louder and more obvious. I always saw the people cheering on screen and celebrating as what happiness would feel like. But I've found that happiness is gentle and calming, and I realized the "happiness" I had growing up was not truly happiness.

I'm doing better now. It fucking sucked to get here. But... it's worth it.

[footballfanficwriter]

Questions

Summary: In which Jude is in an interview and asked about the reader

Time period: A few years after the world cup

"Welcome back to another episode of one on one, today we are joined by one of the world's greatest midfielders Jude Bellingham, Jude how are you" the interviewer asks

"I'm great man, how are you"

"Good thanks, now you have been to the world cup a few years ago and played against Kylian Mbappe can you please tell us what that was like"

"Uhm well I'll tell you one thing the man's got speed,a really amazing player, great talent but playing against him was something I kinda found hard to fathom and get it into my head, I mean we tried our best to hold on as long as possible and all that matters is that we tried our best"

"Ok I wanna ask a bit about your personal life if that's fine" the interviewer says

"No sure go ahead"

"Your Wife Y/N can you tell us a bit about her"

"Well y/n is my wife, she's the mother of my three lovely kids ,she is my best friend, the love of my life and I don't think I would still be here if it wasn't for her and my mom"

"That's sweet, can you tell us how you met your wife"

" uhm well we met at a red carpet event where she was her brother's plus one and we were placed next to one another so we just started having conversations and at the end of the night we exchanged numbers and after first becoming best friends, about a year later I confessed my feelings for her and she told me she felt the same and we dated for a few years then tied the knote"

"What's something that just makes you fall in love with her again"

"She has this weird laugh that freaks some people out but cause it sounds weird so when I hear her laugh it just reminds or takes me back to the times I would make her laugh before we were dating and I'd get the same reaction"

"What's one thing that just sometimes annoys you about her"

"Nothing she's perfect and I love her so much"

" I've never heard someone answer a question like that, I usually get 'the way she controls the household or how she wants everything presise'

"Well my wife's not like other wife's I mean yes she has her tendency of being a bit controlling, but once she realizes she doing it she immediately stops and asks us on our opinions of what we want to do"

"Who does the cooking and looking after the kids in the house"

" well it's the both of us ,sometimes we'll rotate like I'll do the cooking while she looks after the kids and vice versa, because I can't expect her to do all that by herself, it'll strain her physically and emotionally and I can't let that happen"

"Would you say that if your wife wasn't in your life that you'd have still made it"

"No, absolutely not, my wife has seen me at my lowest and my highest, she's always been there to help and pick me up when I was at my lowest and support me at my highest and same goes for her I saw her at her lowest and her highest and I'm really proud of the things she's achieved .

"And how's fatherhood treating you"

" Fatherhood has it moments when it tough and times when it's enjoyable, my kids they are growing up so fast you know, it feels like just yesterday I was holding them for the first time"

"Can you please share a moment that you shared with your children"

"There was this one time when I had gotten home late from practice and Leilani my 5year old daughter was still up playing with her toys, when I asked her why she was up she told me she was waiting for me to come back home cause she had something important to tell me or rather ask me"

"What did she wanna say"

"She said to me, Daddy I love you so much and I always will, because you will always have a special place in my heart, but I have a boyfriend and he's gonna be my husband cause we're getting married, I looked at her in shock because I wasn't expecting that, then I told her she had to break up with him and she started crying, so I told her she can have her boyfriend and she stopped crying, right before asking me to read her a story book and tuck her in, when I refused she started crying until I agreed"

"Well thank you so much Jude for joining us today I really enjoyed it"

"No problem mate and thank you too"

[bottleofbread]

Looks sad. Whips out the Ukulele

"Hi. It's been a while since you saw my face. I haven't been doing so great, so I took a little break. A lot of people are saying some things about me that aren't quite true. It doesn't matter if it's true though just as long as it's entertaining to you. right? You guys having fun? All aboard the toxic gossip train chugging down the tracks of misinformation.

The toxic gossip train... They got a one-way ticket to manipulation station. Toxic gossip traaaain. Tie me to the tracks and harass me for my past. Rumors look like facts if you don't mind the gaps and I won't survive the crash but heyyyy. At least you are having fun.

Uh hi everyone, I've been wanting to come online and talk to you about a few things um even though my team has strongly advised me to not say what I want to say I recently realized that they never said that I couldn't sing what I want to say. So... (looks super smug and really proud of herself)

So here I am and um today I only want to talk about the facts so I hope that you'll be willing to listen.

Here we go.

Many years ago I used to message my fans uh but not in a creepy way like a lot of you are trying to suggest it was more of a loser kind of way but I was just trying to be besties with everybody. it's kind of like when you go to like a family gathering you know and there's a weird aunt there keeps coming up to you and going like "hey girl what's the tea?" and you're like that weird. Uhm that was me but in group chats with my fans. it was weird.

I've been sharing my life online for over 15 years I've poured my heart out to you and because of that I feel like I'm talking to my friends but in the beginning of my career I didn't really understand that maybe there should be some boundaries there.

There were times the DMS when I would share details of my life, which was really weird of me. I haven't done for in years you see, because I changed my behavior and I took accountability.

But that's not very interesting is it? So let's go on the toxic gossip train. Locomotives filed fueled with hateful accusations. The toxic gossip train. Steamrolling all over someone's reputation

Toxic gossip train, hop on board but close your eyes otherwise you'll realize that the train is made of lies and that the person you despise maybe didn't deserve to die, but hey at least you're having fun.

In all seriousness, I do think it's really important to hold people accountable for their mistakes um you know we should hope that everyone can learn from their mistakes and grow and change their behavior and be a better person. This is something that I've always tried to do when I make mistakes. It's something that I will continue to try to do...

What oh you don't care oh okay I thought you wanted me to take accountability but that's not the point of your mob mentality, is it? No, your goal is to ruin the life of the person you despise while you dramatize your lies and monetize their demise ... yeah.

I feel like I can already hear the comments on this video: she's gaslighting, manipulating oh she's a narcissist and a rat, I would never make a mistake like that.

oh I'm sorry I didn't realize that all of you are perfect, so please criticize me. Bring out the daggers made from your perfect past and stab me repeatedly in my bony little back. I'm sure you're disappointed in my shitty little song. I know you wanted me to say that I was 100% in the wrong. Well I'm sorry, I'm not gonna take that route of admitting to lies and rumors that you made up for clout.

Hey everybody I found someone new to harass she did some things that I do not like in her past so everybody gather round cause we're about to attack but not based on facts. Oh no you're loaded Lethal Weapon It's your fingers on the keys. You don't need any armor when you can hide behind a screen so shoot me down quick, with a click and bam - the reputation is deceased.

I also wanted to take a minute to talk about that girl, Miranda Sings, you know the one. She's PG-13 it says that on my website and it's always been that way and that's why you won't find my videos on the YouTube kids app anyway. um I didn't realize it was my responsibility to decide what was appropriate for every kid to see. I've always relied on parents to decide if they're comfortable, with their families watching my YouTube videos or coming to my live shows.

Now. Have I made some jokes in poor taste? yes. Have I made lots of dumb mistakes? yes.

am I sad that there are some fans who feel betrayed? yes.

Was my intention to manipulate? No.

It doesn't really matter what my intention was because it seems as though everyone's already decided on that.

Let me tell you it's not very fun to have millions of people all over the world call you the most vile ,horrendous, disgusting, life-ruining words that a person can be called, in my opinion.

Um it doesn't matter that these things aren't true, everyone just believes that you are the type of person who manipulates and abuses children.

oh I just wanted to say that um the thing I've ever groomed is my two Persian cats. I'm not a groomer I'm just a loser who didn't understand I shouldn't respond to fans and I'm not a predator, even though a lot of you think so, because five years ago I made a fart joke.

So even though I know this video won't change anyone's mind about me I still felt it was important to come on here and defend myself a little and take accountability. And I also wanted to say that to anyone out there who has ever supported me, in any capacity, I really really appreciate you. thank you.

For what it's worth, I never had any bad intentions but I do feel like shit.

The toxic gossip train, you're chugging down the track of misinformation. Toxic gossip train... You've got a one way ticket to manipulation station. Toxic gossip train... you tied me to the tracks and harassed me for my past. Rumors look like facts when you don't mind the gaps. I won't survive and crash, but hey...I hope you had some fun.

dramatically comes close to the camera to turn it off and then continues with:

Actually, you know, I feel like maybe I should let you guys know something. um it seems like, maybe you're confused about something. I don't know.

Let me try to help, um.

Sometimes people make a mistake and it does and make them a horrible person. whoaaaa. sometimes people can make a mistake and they're still a good person, crazy I know. sometimes people can make a mistake and you don't have to take a mistake and twist it up and grind it and add some lies to it and pulverize it and stab it with knives and ruin a life and. oh no sometimes people can make a mistake, it doesn't mean you gotta send them hate. oh no sometimes people can make a mistake and you can kindly let them know and help them to grow.

sometimes people make mistakes simply because they made a mistake and that mistake doesn't make them a terrible human, it just makes them a human.

But what do I know? Fuck me, right?

[noblissnoignorance]

have you noticed that whenever we talk, i talk like i'm on a date? it always takes me a bit to warm up to you. i can do it, i settle down and quell the pesky palpitations of my snot-nosed heart, but i know you've seen how nervous i get at first. it makes me want to spend all of my time with you because if we're always together, then i never have to deal with the hour one jitters. i like talking to you the way i do my closest friends. you never react oddly to it, so i know i'm not afraid of you. i could say i fear myself. it's a convenient narrative stepping stone to hop to from that, but i don't think i'm afraid of disappointing you. self-effacing isn't accurate. when i'm around you, i'm just so excited, i have to smack myself to be normal. over and over for an hour or two. it's closer to the way you feel at concerts or on roller-coasters than anything else. adrenaline whips me because i just like you so much. i'm just so excited about you. i can't act right, i overthink everything because my brain is making oily sparks in my frying pan skull, and i'm trying not to let them hit you. i wish i had a free pass to tell you i love you and you're so cute every time i think it, but then i worry that if i had it i'd never be able to talk about anything else. i'd be a rotten conversational partner. all i'd wanna do is coo about how dear you are. at the most mundane of things, too. oh, that's the plot of that anime i've never heard of? i love you. something about water? i don't even remember, i can't even make this joke because i was so fried. all i could proffer the last time i saw you were insignificant little thoughts and anecdotes to try and fill the air while i tried to get myself in check, and you always responded, and it was so cute, so i couldn't calm down. i know you saw me keep looking away, staring and eventually laughing at nothing. you seemed confused, but i get the feeling you knew why. it's just the absurdity of it all. love, which i'd call it, oh boy, is so foreign to me in this form. you're not anywhere else in the world, you're here, and i can look at you, and we sit awkwardly on my bed like we're not sure how close we're allowed to get to the other person without making things weird. i don't know what you're thinking, but whenever i envision us together, it's entwined. i'll truly be shocked if that prophecy never comes to pass because it feels so real, so natural. the idea of laying in your arms and just talking. i crave domesticity with you in a way i've never really thought of before. just a desire to share a space, to be able to talk to you whenever, without having to plan it out. one of the silliest things about all this to me is that i think about how i know you, but i only feel i've brushed your surface. if this is somehow all there is, then i'd love you all the same, but for the first time in my life, you're a person who surprises me! i've told you so, but i find you utterly disarming. you're so unique that i just want to earn the right to unravel you. if we were together and it didn't work out, i'd be okay with that. maybe that's not flattering or nice to hear, but it's very earnestly what i feel. i'd Iove to just try. to be able to say i did. and to be able to experience being with you, if only for a little bit. perhaps i've lost the ability to be optimistic about relationships after multiple catastrophic "i'll love you forevers," but you'd be worth the time even if it wasn't forever. a year, a month, a day, anything with you i'd cherish. that being said, it made me realize the possibility that perhaps you want to wait because you want a shot at forever. i'm sure i sound obsessed, i guess i am a little bit, but i think you did tell me as much. you didn't wanna damage our relationship, but this and that and this. i'm just really hoping for something with you because i would be so proud of even a moment.

[eliezersaul]

I'm kinda glad proud of some decisions I take sometimes ... Despite the whole story may be a bit too bizarre, even for me! But, for example ... I'm f----------king tired of dudes who I want to actually befriend (yes, nothing else), and then I realize they just want me to top them! No! I'm not looking for sex, you idiot! If I were looking for a one night stand or something, I'd be honest from second one instead of going endlessly in circles! If I say FRIENDSHIP, it means friendship. But unfortunately, for many gay/bi dudes, that's a word that doesn't exist.

I mean ... There's this dude that was texting me the other day through twitter, and, well, he's here in my city and the like... We've never seen each other, but everytime I used to talk to him and tell him to go and have some beers, maybe a pizza, or maybe coming home to share a good time, meet my boyfriend husband and so on ... He started with a drama, very high school style (and we're talking about a dude in his late 40s!) ... That, he didn't like that kind of plan, and that he wanted to just to "walk", to "talk", to "connect our souls" (whatever that means!) ... I let him know I wasn't looking for romance, that I just wanted a friendship and nothing else ... He insisted, so I stopped talking to him. A couple days ago, he texted back, asking me if he could come "and visit me" ... It was a little weird, so I told him I couldn't receive anyone at home right now ... But I asked him what he had in mind, and he said "well, I can pay you a hotel room so we can fck, I'll move out of the country next week so I wanna have a special time with you". Excuse me!? First, I'm not a human fl-shlight for you to use when feeling horny. And, second ... I never mentioned sex while talking to you; so, if you're thaaaaaaat needy, I don't know... Go to a sauna, or hire one of these dudes you can easily find online (wink, wink), download an app (you know WHICH ONE!)... Do something! But darling, I've got now ZERO respect for you. Like ZERO. Honestly? I left his last message read. Won't even bother to block him. MAYBE 10-12 years ago I would have accepted that, and I'm preeeeeeeeeetty sure it would have been a meh moment, but now!? Darling, F you. From the bottom of my heart. I'm not here to quench your thirst. I'm truly glad of the man I'm becoming.

[stardust-static]

Today was my birthday 🎂 yaaaay.. I keep forgetting how old I am. People ask and I'm like "uhh.." it's 32 apparently. Jeez.. that's bananas.

But yeah I had a good day. Realized that I have officially outgrown malls. Went to a nice mall with Bailey. Realized I didn't want anything there. Sat in two hours of traffic on the way home and yeah now I'm home in my cozy snuggie hoodie and I'm so happy to be back in my natural habitat. Best part was that today was a total cheat day. Had a couple bites of a cheeseburger from my favorite place and then we shared the best cheese fries ever (portillos). Then we went to the mall and got a waffle fish filled with vanilla custard and cookies and cream soft serve, it was exquisite. Then when we finally got close to home and we're starving, I decided to opt out of the fancy sushi date we had planned and wanted a stuffed crust pizza instead. I have not had pizza in months. Heres the weird mental part of this whole weight loss process. Mentally I was my old self again like "I'm so hungry! I'm gonna eat this whole thing!" Yeah... There's no way. I had one smaller slice and i was done for. Fed half the stuffed crust to the dogs. The strange part was then feeling a bit sad after at the fact that I couldn't eat more. A fleeting feeling as I snatched it up and examined it and then turned it into gratitude instead. I am grateful that I now have this tool that gives me self control and that I can no longer eat a whole large pizza to myself if I wanted to. It wasn't exactly a proud feeling I got afterwards the few times I did actually do that. Self loathing was more like it. I'm happy I'm not in that place anymore.

And yeah anyway... Birthdays are weird. Never been a big birthday person. At least not with my own. This year I just used it as an excuse to indulge a little and walk around a mall I hadn't been to in forever.. Barnes and Noble or a plant nursery would have been a better idea.

If you're reading this I hope March 7th was good to you. 💖

[boldlyvoid]

so... this interview got me thinking.

J: Your fans are amazing fans. I will just say that. I know you said it earlier, but they obviously are so excited that you're here on our show, so we're getting a lot of buzz from your fans. And they were like, "Wait. What are they going to talk about? What's going on? I heard this. [ Blabbering ] "This is ten seconds long." There's Easter eggs that maybe aren't even really Easter eggs.

T: Yeah, it's sort of a tradition that we started a very long time ago. I think the first time that I started dropping sort of cryptic clues and things in my music is when I was 14 and 15 putting together my first album. And I wanted to put -- I wanted to do something that incentivized fans to read the lyrics because my lyrics are what I'm most proud of out of everything that I do, every aspect of my job, so I really wanted people to read the lyrics. And, um, when I was a kid, I used to leaf through CD booklets and just read the teeny, tiny print and just obsess over it. And so I wanted to incentivize them. So in my lyrics, for my first, you know, several albums, I would have all lower-case-letter lyrics, except for capital letter, capital letter, capital letter every once in a while. And if they circled the capital letter, and wrote them down, it spelled out a secret code, a secret passage.

J: That's so fun.

T: It was really --it was really fun, and it would either tell them a story about the album or a hint about what the song was about. And so that's when it started. But when it got out of control was...

[ Laughter ]

T: Yeah. Was when I started to realize that it wasn't just me that had fun with this, that they had fun with it, too. And I should never have learned that because then I couldn't stop. And then all I started thinking of was how do I hint at things? Like, how far is too far in advance? Can I hint at something three years in advance? Can I even plan things out that far? I think I'm gonna try to do it. The first time that we did a crazy video like that was a video called "Look What You Made Me Do," and I started playing with doing nods to former musical eras I've been in, in my career and all kinds of weird stuff for them to just go through the video and be like, "That over there! What's that? What's that? What's that? Does this connect to that? What does that mean?"

J: I do that.

T: Really?

J: Yes! I did that with "Folklore." I go, "Wait. What? Betty? What?"

T: There's a lot. There's a lot going There's, like, a fictional love triangle between three fictional teenagers in the "Folklore" album.

J: I know all about it.

T: There's all kinds of, like, really, really --Yeah, we go really into the weeds over it. And look. I think that it is perfectly reasonable for people to be normal music fans and to have a normal relationship to music. But if you want to go down a rabbit hole with us, come along.

J: Taylor is your person.

T: The water's great. Jump in. We're all mad here.

Which is a hint at Alice in wonderland. back when this first aired, everyone thought she was referring to the fact one of her bonus tracks on 1989 was Wonderland, it's also the name of one of her perfumes. this went with her first TikTok when she released Wildest Dreams Taylors Version... which Taylor Nation confirmed today was a hint at midnights and not 1989 TV.

what's interesting to me about the use of this, is that Clocks go Tick Tock. it was her first tiktok! she's in midnights variant blue and the section of the song is "You'll see me in hindsight. Tangled up with you all night. Burning it down."

it's obvious she's been making a lot of references to night and fire. but also time. Time is the biggest component of this album. And it's the most important theme inside Alice in Wonderland.

Credit

If Lover is Midnights Sister Album:

the Forward in lover gives us even more clues on what to expect.

she mentions her journals, she started writing them when she was 13. she has every memory written down on pages and she shared them with us. The Delux version of lover came in 4 volumes. 4 sets of journals documenting past and highlighting moments of love.

What if Midnights is the night before Lover? she did write Lover in the middle of the night.

And then i remembered the Vault Tracks were clocks...

stopwatches to be more exact.

she's been telling us everything we need to know this whole time.

[lordtraco-fanfics]

More Soul Eater AU ideas but for Legends Arceus:

(this has devolved into me practically outlining a fic, apologies.)

(using They/them Akari as placeholder for player character Akari or Rei. ALSO SPOILERS FOR PLA ENDING)

Akari is a meister of sorts. They can unknowingly resonate with the help of the Arc Phone

Between their soul pulsing out their good intentions and the balms reminding the Nobles of their wardens, the frenzies can be quelled

Ingo feels a kinship with Akari, but also a drive to protect them. He chalks it up to them being a child. Of course everyone wants to protect a child.

*COUGHexceptKamadothejerkCOUGH*

Ingo doesn't remember being a weapon shifter, but instincts take over when a meister is in danger.

Akari once fell from very high up in the Highlands, only to be caught by Ingo. Neither were certain how the blades in his arms showed up, but said blades dug into the cliff and kept them both from continuing the fall so...

It didn't last long. Soon they both slipped and-

And Akari was alone, falling again but now had a knife? Something told them to jab it into the cliff

The two had only one goal: protection. Their souls matched wavelengths and intensified until the simple knife scratching at the rock face glowed red.

It partly melted the rocks, allowing for a slowed descent, yet the heat didn't affect Akari at all.

I chose cyndaquil, so I like to think Akari has a fiery soul.

Could do three separate scenes...

Rowlet-choice Akari finds vines growing where the blade touches and is able to grab on

Oshawatt-choice Akari finds the blade darkening and with a single hit at just the right crevice, is able to abruptly stop their fall. (Ceaseless Edge)

No matter how, Akari safely gets down and Ingo transforms back. Despite many questions, he's unable to answer any or repeat the experience

Plus they've gotta beat up an alpha

They both put the mystery aside until the sky breaks and Akari is banished.

Ingo finds Akari and wordlessly becomes a blade once more for them. As a pearl clan warden, he cannot assist. But as a knife he can at least be sure they won't fall again.

It takes a while for Akari to realize the knife is for left-handed use and not just Weird (the knife is a human person, it's already Weird)

"I want to tape you to a roomba." "A what?" "You can talk? As a knife?" "We're derailing here, Akari, what in the world is a roomba?"

Ingo just be chilling through the red chain fetch quest. I'd like to imagine that Azelf gets them both so annoyed that they resonate out of shared frustration.

They're able to lob a gigaton ball as if it were a jet ball thanks to the resonance. It bonks Azelf on the head.

Ingo stays with them even through to the dialga/palkia fight, but deflecting attacks and resonating keeps bringing back wisps of memories and it's distracting them both.

"I must decouple from this train. It was an honor, Akari." Ingo transforms back and shields them from an attack while they ready another balm.

A second of hesitation leads to a quick hug from Ingo. "I'm proud of the heights you've climbed. Set your course to victory on the Singles Train now and we'll battle again."

Akari defeats Dialga/Palkia alone.

Ingo stays at the Training Grounds and refuses to speak on what happened, focused only on facilitating pokemon battles.

(he's remembered just enough for it to really hurt. He misses two people dearly but knows he can't reach them. All he can do is lose himself in pokemon battles)

Akari is crushed but makes a lot of time to battle him anyways. It seems to cheer him up at least a little.

Their training pays off when facing Volo and Giratina.

Finally after catching Arceus, Akari and Ingo are allowed to return home.

Ingo's timing is impeccable because it's just as his brother and Elesa are about to get their butts handed to them

Akari does end up finding Ingo again after returning home. They get to hold Emmet in knife form for all of one second before "Roomba?" "Make me Stabby the Roomba! :)"

Chaos duo Akari and their immediately-adopted uncle Emmet are immune to Parental Glares from Ingo and Elesa.

Aunt Elesa teaching Akari a random assortment of modeling tips, meister stuff, and how to become a gym leader. They listen, never really bringing up that they're already a Champion back home. More fun to be Just a Kid in Unova than the Champion of Sinnoh or the Hero of Hisui.

[enlightenedrobot]

On Shame

Alright, I'm writing this off the cuff. No outline, only the mildest idea of where I wanna go with this, but I'd like to talk a bit about myself for a moment.

Earlier today, Lindsay put out a video titles mask off, where she basically addresses various accusations put up against her in bad faith. I don't want to talk too much about her, but I do have to mention that I largely agree with her and kinda sorta share her frustration with the culture created by Social Media.

Anyways... at about 1:20:00 in a video, Lindsay Ellis starts talking about how bizarre it is that we have so many campaigns against minor left-leaning barely celebs while actual racists somehow manage to keep their platforms.

"Are there not enough out and proud racists that you feel the need to unmask the My Little Pony Youtuber?"

"Because you can't impact people who are actually doing your community harm, you can't shame the shameless... So you shame those who can't be shamed those who can be shamed. And if you call one of us bigoted enough times, people will start to believe it. And then you can feel like you solved racism by spreading lies about a person you have never met, and never will, and was doing you and your community no harm. Well done."

That... resonates with me.

You guys don't know it... but I've been falling off my social media game. I had an ongoing blog, I shared my opinions and hot takes, and every now and then I'd make a post that would take off. I never became an influencer, or even necessarily even popular, but I had a thing going on that I was proud of.

And even better, it's how I was teaching myself to write. The word "writer" is literally in my bio.

For a lot of this last year, I've been trying to find out why I fell off. Why it's so much harder for me to write down my thoughts and post them. and thanks to Lindsay, I think I finally figured out why.

I'm a coward. I'm terrified of better-than-though social justice gatekeepers who will pick apart every little thing you say to find some sort of hidden racism. They'll call you out for liking and relating to a black character in a cartoon created by a black man because that character "isn't black enough", or refer to a post I make about a Hip Hop artist I happen to really like as "white-nonsense".

Here's the thing. I'm not white.

I'm also not straight or cis or able-bodied. I would not consider myself among the most oppressed people in the world... but dear god, it's not a contest and I'm sick of pretending that I'm not a victim.

I'm so scared of this mob of people who just don't matter, that I'm letting them literally silence me. Keep in mind, these are the same people who are always "Elevate POC voices" and "don't let white people silence you."

If you people really want to elevate POC voices, then you have to realize that also means recognizing POC as people. We're not some monolith shouting racism at Disney movies, we're individuals of different backgrounds and cultures and thoughts.

And yes, we do have shared experiences. To be a member of any culture means you'll inevitably come across situations where you experience similar microaggressions or are harmed by the same institutions you guys have to realize... I can't talk for anyone other than myself.

Anyways, The entire situation wind Lindsay Ellis apparently started with this tweet:

For whatever reason, people thought Lindsay was negatively comparing Raya to Avatar, and by extension she was also implying that Southeast Asians were the same as East Asians.

She wasn't, she explains her POV in her video, and frankly... I kind of agree with her.

And look... I'm literally Filipino. Raya the Last Dragon is my representation, and like literally everybody else who saw the trailer when it first came out, my thoughts were "Oh. So Disney's doing Avatar now."

I bring this up because... wow was this a weird situation to follow. Lindsay posts a very luke-warm take on twitter, gets cancelled, and deletes her account, all the while people are making claims that Raya the Last Dragon is some kind of pinnacle of Southeast Asian representation, and that somehow, her lukewarm, often repeated take on a Disney Movie, a take which I, an actual Southeast Asian, happen to share... that's what's silencing us?

Like... the people stopping us from speaking up isn't some milk toast breadtuber.

I'm confident people will disagree with me, but I've never been victimized by Lindsay Ellis or her peers. If anything, I just get more excited to voice my own opinions. She's just out there doing her thing on Twitter and Youtube, and if I had any sense, I'd be trying to pursue my own thing.

And let's be real here, the reason why I stopped pursuing my own thing is the same reason Lindsey was canceled in the first place. We're scared of being shamed.

I don't even have the same hatedom Lindsey does, and I'm still scared of it. Even after I post this editorial, that fear's going to continue to linger. I'm worried that people are gonna read this entire thing and start calling me a Lindsay Ellis simp or whitewashed or whatever bullshit racist nonsense they're gonna project onto me.

But if I ever want to continue living my life, producing the content I want to make, writing the posts I want to write, then I'm gonna take a page out of Lindsay's book.

Shame is cancelled. I have no brand. All that's left is me.

[cryptidrocker]

Introduction: Metalocalypse OC

@rotten-carcass @different4black @mommymao

To be honest everyone could see madness coming a mile away, everytime Toki went to one of his Rock N' roll fantasy camps something weird either happened to him or came back home with him. One time two stray cats, someone elses guitar another, and this time.....a complete dumbass?

"Hi's!" Toki waved to his boys, I watched their faces change as their eyes adjusted to the sight of me. Nodding my head once they all got a good look, Toki slowly introducing me to the others. "This is My news friend!" I walked up to the boys, Shaking hands with my left as i held Toki's case in my right. "Uh, not to be a dick but who's this douchebag toki." I smirked a bit, turning to what Toki told me was their lead singer. "I was Toki's bass instructor. To be honest he's a great learner, you should be proud." I winked at the end, Toki happy to recieve praise in the eyes of skwisgaar or the others. "Ye, but why're you still here?" The red head known as pickles. wait....pickles??? Yes right, Toki had told me I'd be meeting him but still in the flesh it was weird seeing the singer of Snakes N' Barrels like this.

I cleared my throat, "Well. Toki asked me to stay with you guys a bit. Said I needed or could help open you guys's shows up." I shrugged with that and waltzed in behind Toki. Along the walls of mordhaus, The boys asking several more questions and even nathan wanting a cd of mine to probably make fun of me for later but who cared. Toki was giving me a much too enthusiastic tour, but at this point I was used to that from him. Finally, showing me where I'd be staying.

"Toki....love, not to be picky. cause im already incredibly honored with what you've given me already, but there's a dead clown in this room." Toki threw his head back around, face full of horror. "Deads?! Dr Rockso!" Sprinting into the room, shaking the sleeping clown until he popped up again. I laughed a bit before realizing just how much that clown meant to him. "Dr Rockso?" I asked, peering further into the room. There he stood, Older of course but still him. Though I went in open minded, I think because of how much Toki was talking me up about being his pal that Rockso probably saw it as a threat. Either that or maybe just my outfit. "Howdy." I stuck out my hand only to be met with a growling stare and silence. Toki seeming a bit confused I took my hand back and smiled. "So Dr.Rockso. You playing with them as well? Guess Toki'll have to deal with both of us for now." I joked. Up until Rockso finally pointed at my getup. "You a c-c-cheap replacement?" Hatred in his eyes. Toki seemed taken aback by that, shoving Rockso's hand down as he explained we were both simply great friend in close music types.

All in all this was probably one of the mosr awkward musician interactions I had ever had. Though it would soon get worse, Rockso still giving me glares as Toki explained until anything changed and the band talked it over with charles We would be sharing rooms. I found it hilarious but Rockso's temperament immediately went dark. I sat my stuff down and waved by at The boys, before flopping back onto my bed. Idly flipping through one of my books. Slowly rockso padded over and sat on his bed, staring me down. "Can I help you old man?" I yawned. His eyes getting smaller, "You know you're not better than me. I'm the rock n roll clown in this world!" I chuckled a bit, setting the book down and leaning up. "Honey, I'm no clown." I raised an eyebrow staring the man down. "Besides," i sighed "You've been out of it for a while." I snickered a bit at his angry reaction. "So. Seems we're not going to get along." He finally said, breaking the silence. "Oh no. We're gonna be best friends." i remarked. "Ooh!" I glanced over, the man leaning on his elbows, "I have a bet for us." I laughed. "Whoever warms up the crowd better each night, or lets say gets called for more encores? They get to boss around the other one for the night." I joked before he turned serious, "Deal Rugrat."

all of this before Toki burst in for what he called 'metal sleepover!' us just sitting watching him draw and explain his thoughts for new songs, Everyonce in a while rockso glancing up to see me staring blankly at him. At some point I winked at the man, his face going confused before turning red and looking away. 'is it this easy? how lonely is he...' I chuckled, asking Toki a stupid question to keep him entertained. Feeling now, my turn to have Rockso's eyes burning holes into the back of my head.

This was going to be fun.

[pollyaunt]

The Prom: Jurdan High School au Chapter 3

Fandom: TFOTA | Ch 4

Warnings: None

Summary: Cardan and Jude have hated each other but are forced to work together. Let's see how this story ends.

A/N: hi hi hi i hope you like this.........much love

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter: 3

For the next few days, Cardan and his group didn't bully me. Everyone were so busy for Prom and the project, I suppose bullying for them might not be that important.

Speaking of the history project, since the past 4 days Cardan and I are hanging out at different places. While working we realized, we not only understand each other the best but are similar in some ways too.

Just as my last period ended, I got a notification.

Cardan: Today at The Mortal Cafe. I'll be outside the school.

Me: Don't forget to bring your laptop ;)

Cardan: So what if I did?

Me: I won't share mine FYI

Cardan: Yes you will

Me: No I won't

Cardan: Yes

Me: No

I chuckled at this conversation. Surprisingly, I realized we smile a lot whenever we're around each other now and the hatred was gone. Perhaps, it was replaced with.....

Never mind, I went outside only to find Cardan and his black Bentley.

His signature smirk plastered on his face with one hand on the steering wheel while the other was on the lever.

I sat and shut the door. He started driving at the same time.

"Did you bring your laptop?", I already knew the answer.

"Nope,"

"I'm not sharing my laptop today,"

"So you've mentioned it,"

"Have you been to this Mortal cafe? It's a weird name," I frowned at the last part.

"Yeah I've been there a lot. The food is divine," he actually used all the expressions possible in 1 freaking sentence.

"Do you like drama or acting?", I frowned again.

"Are you stalking me?", our eyes met only for a moment.

"Obviously no, you actually used all the expressions in one sentence." I remarked.

"I'm nothing if not dramatic. And yes I like drama and I am a part of the drama club in school. It's the only thing that I like in there," I was surprised to hear that even though I guessed half of it.

"I like football since elementary school," I confessed. Since he shared a piece of himself, I thought I should reciprocate it as well.

"Oh really?"

"Yeah."

We reached our destination in 20 minutes and slid into a booth at right corner.

Once we ordered the food, I announced, "Tell me about your family,"

He seemed to be taken back at the sudden topic of conversation but covered it with a weak chuckle, "Umm my parents never really paid me real shine. Just fulfilled my needs and gave me money," one more chuckle without humor, "My dad always have been proud of my elder five siblings, 3 sisters and 2 brothers and my mom only want her luxuries to be provided. She never really cared about me," a sad smile spread on his lips.

"I- I am so sorry Cardan. I didn't mean to upset you, " he took my hand abruptly across the table, "It isn't your fault."

We kept staring at each other, now with a genuine smile when our food arrived. He never let go of my hand either. We laughed and teased while eating. It felt like home. Like I belonged here. With him.

So our project meeting changed into a hangout on that day.

On our way back, I got a call from Vivi.

"Hi,"

"Can you check your messages for at least once in your life?" she was definitely annoyed.

"Just cut to the point, Vivi,"

"Me and Heather are at the bowling alley. Would you like to join?" Heather is Vivi's girlfriend since past 2 years.

"Hold on a sec," I turned to Cardan and asked, "Would you like to come with me at bowling alley? Vivi is also there,"

"Are you sure?" He seemed uncertain.

"100%" He nodded at that.

I returned to Vivi and said, "Okay so Cardan and I will be be there in 15 minutes," with that I hung up because I knew what was the next question.

We arrived at the bowling alley only to find Vivi and Heather chatting with the worst people possible: Taryn and Locke. Oh god I couldn't even back out.

Muttering a curse under my breath, we went up to them. Vivi saw us first and gave a hug. She introduced Heather to Cardan and they quickly became friends. When we finally settled down, I noticed Taryn glaring at me and Cardan with a scowl even though she was sitting on Locke's lap.

"Hello Jude, I am surprised to see you with Cardan of all people." Locke gave an ugly smile, I can't believe I liked that smile once.

"Hello Locke, and I am surprised to see your girlfriend sitting on your lap but still scowling at me. Have I done something dear Taryn?" I will not spare her.

Before she could answer, Vivi announced a bowling competition in pairs. We all agreed to it.

After winning 9 rounds and coming second with Cardan, we both were in a really excited mood. Vivi and Heather came first while Taryn and Locke came third.

We talked for a while after that, "So Jude who are you going to Prom with?" Taryn really knew how to ruin my mood.

All the happiness and excitement turned into ice and I froze. Finally I responded, "No one asked me yet," through gritted teeth.

Cardan looked surprised but covered it just as quickly and said, "I think I should go its already late. Jude, do you want a ride back home?" He truly knew I was uncomfortable. "Sure."

The ride back home was completely silent. Just when we reached at my house, I thanked him for saving me. "Don't mention it and thank you for asking me to come. You didn't have to."

"But I wanted to. I enjoyed today." It was the truth.

He smiled and said, "So did I. Good-night."

I smiled back and replied, "Good-night," with that he left and I went to my room. I fell on my bed, sleep promising in my eyes and thought about that whole day as I drifted off to dreams. --------------------------------------------------------------------------

okay there was some problem w my tumblr thats why the format is a bit different and im sorry if ur disappointed :(

tag list: @slightlyrebelliouswriter23 @thewickedkings @thekingdomofelfhame @greenbriarxrose @cinnamonsketchdust @charincharge @clockworkgraystairs @jurdanhell @jurdannet @nee-naw-nee-naw-beepbeep

[atsunflower]

Rated: SFW

Author notes: *sigh* for the third time the damned app ate up the tags. This one took me too long and I'm excited for write about my man suna again. This is also pretty different from what I'm used to write, but why not? Please enjoy your reading.

Warnings: cursing, substance usage/mentions, break-ups and me trynna be funny.

I – Cancel me.

Previous || Next

He looked at them with expectation as the beats smoothly faded, indicating the song's ending. 

If he were to be honest, the pair before him was a pain in the ass, but their opinion was that important because, when it came to music, they were the best at it. He felt no shame nor jealousy in admitting it.

"Dunno, the hook sounds like a Vice headline ta me." The bleach-haired male said, hearring the song's outro blaring through the studio speakers.

"Isn't it a Kid Milli reference, tho?" The other asked while munching a chip. He frowned at them, not understanding their point.

"Whatever. You two are no help anyways." Hearring their bullshit, the brunette already regretted this collab. He paused the queued song, turning to the other two with a blank stare.

The twins before him snickered, knowing they successfully hit a nerve. They couldn't help it, provoking Suna was one of their favorite hobbies.

"The song is good, but I gotta tell ya this butt hurt phase of yers is pretty lame." The faux-blond opened his mouth again, spinning around the studio with the desk chair. 

"Fuck you, Atsumu" He snapped, almost giving in to the desire of decking them both on the face.

"Tsumu's right, ya Lil Peep wannabe. Can't believe this break up ended up that bad." Osamu said in mockery, throwing the empty Lay's wrapper at him. He scoffed, disposing the wrapper on the bin before getting back at the screen to look at the FL studio interface.

"It's not that I have a broken heart. I just wanna know what's wrong with my life" He shrugged, blindly tacting over the desk in search of his Juul.

"Yeah Samu, he's just grieving over those fancy ass Dior Jordans. Sunarin is incapable of mundane things like a broken heart." His blond friend was partially right.

Suna Rintaro was many things: alt model, music producer, cloud artist and a decent volleyball player that almost went pro. But if there was something he could never be, it was a lucky man on love matters.

With his fair share of failed relationships, the artist could never pinpoint when things went wrong. It would always be the same: he would meet a girl, they would have a good time and then, the chick would turn out demanding as fuck.

In the end, every single one of them would slap him across the face and leave his life banging the front door shut like crazy — last week, it was Mika who broke things off, but not before setting his limited edition pair of jordans on fire. He would never get over those sneakers.

"Good for him, those kicks were kinda ugly." Osamu said in a bored manner. Suna felt his soul leaving his body.

"The hell, Osamu?" He was ready to fight, deeply offended by the attack at his taste in fashion.

"Yo, you two." Atsumu butted in, checking something on his phone "Y'all are drifting away from our problem."

"That is?" The other brother asked.

"Cheer up Sunarin before he fucks up with the Album." If Suna had the energy, he would kick both Miyas out of his studio "And I gotta the perfect thing. Let's hang out at Akagi's tonight, he just invited us." The already distressed musician felt the soul leaving his body for the second time that afternoon. He was sure both twins wished his death.

"Not a fucking chance. Last time I went there I almost died because of that weird stuff we smoked." 

"Aw, Sunarin, Kita'll be there too." The faux-blonde tried to persuade. The mention of their older, responsible and straight edge friend made Suna look at them with interest. But he needed more, though. Based on the last experience, he didn't have the will to risk his life going to Akagi's house once again. A shiver descended his spine as the male recalled how much he threw up that night.

"Suna, man, I gotta agree with Tsumu. Yer feelings are showing in your music." Osamu said as if he was some kind of genius.

"Isn't art about it, tho?" He deadpanned "Expressing feelings and shit?" He asked, staring them dead in the eye. The males before him shivered because of its intensity. Suna snickered.

"Man says art, but most of his songs are about the Nikes on his feet and the Tesla in his garage." Atsumu mocked "What the fuck?" The blonde barely dodged the moleskine thrown at him.

"Don't chew on me when you do the same, asshat. This is called character development." As unnerving the twins were, he felt a whole lot better in their company "Just lemme produce my sad stuff in peace."

"Cut us some slack, ya dumbfuck. We're just worried about ya." Osamu protested " 'Sides, no wonder no girl sticks by yer side. You know what the chicks find sexy? Seizing the means of production, not yer dumb car."

"You two are so la—" The musician was interrupted mid sentence, startled by the blond figure clutching his phone with enthusiasm.

"Oi Samu," Atsumu's loud voice startled the other two, as he excitedly fisted the air.

"What the fuck?" Suna asked, dropping the Juul on the floor.

"She'll be there tonight." The blond said, looking at his brother with a new wave of joy.

"The fuck? She who?" The brunette frowned.

"Ya gotta go and find out, man." The gray haired twin said with a knowing smile, matching his brother's excitement.

The night out felt somewhat draining. The booze, the music and the company were great, but his lack of energy was a mood killer.

Cheer me up my ass, Suna cursed internally as he observed everyone getting wasted all over the place. He grimaced at the sight, realizing the meeting with the twins was enough social interaction for the day.

He didn't know what's gotten into him. The male knew it wasn't necessarily caused by the break up, but he couldn't help the feeling down.

Right now, life just felt lowkey suffocating. 

Being a public figure meant being under the spotlights the most of time.

People talked.

People assumed.

Media was all over him, ready to catch a scandall.

And of fucking course his name was on gossip headlines. It even occupied a spot on twitter trending topics for a day or so.

"Fuck me." He said before the lukewarm beer went down his throat.

"Sunarin!" He heard Atsumu shouting from his right "I want you to meet someone!" And only now he noticed the blond had his left arm over a girl's shoulders.

Oh, that's the one they were talking about, maybe? the brunette realized. What's the hype, tho? He asked himself, eyeing your figure.

"[Name], this is Suna. Sunarin, this is [Name], best girl ever and the mastermind behind the visuals of mine and Samu's last album" The bleach-haired male said with a proud smirk, ruffling your hair. You were obviously shy.

How cute, the brunette thought.

"Dumbass, don't embarrass me in front of others!" You nudged the Miya with your elbow "Nice to meet you, I saw your name on TMZ last week—" You said beaming and he grunted.

I take it back. Not cute at all, the man internally screamed, not ready to talk about the recent events. He didn't even want to listen to the rest of your speech, your cheery voice went through his ears in a white noise.

"And this makes me really excited for your album. The interview about the collab with dumb and dumber was lit." You continued, the words were genuine and you seemed really interested "And I also relate on a spiritual level because I know working with them is hell."

Oh, she's talking about the album. He realized in relief.

"Yo, I heard good things about you too. The design of their album was hella sick, even though they two suck ass." Suna snickered when he heard Atsumu protesting. You only left out a giggle, joining him on the teasing.

The blond kept ranting about how bad of friends the two of you were.

"I didn't introduce y'all ta gang up on me. Bye, I'm finding another company. Ya two suck." The blonde Miya said, leaving only you and Suna in the sofa area.

"Uh, so…" He drifted off, trying to start some small talk

"Yeah..." You both giggled at the awkwardness "Not enjoying the night?"

"Too much happening right now. Lots of people talking shit 'bout me." He sipped the beer, grimacing at the stale taste of the drink "Hope they cancel me already. So all this shit dies down." Suna looked away, suddenly shy for opening up to a stranger.

"You're a famous guy and the break-up wasn't that scandalous. It'll be over eventually, just beware the sneaker cult." Your amusement was comfort enough. You didn't make intrusive questions about the events and merely joked it off. He felt so worn out by the situation but, at least, your presence wasn't overbearring.

"How is it everyone knows about the jordans?" You shrugged it off, laughing at the distressed face he mocked. Sighing in relief, Suna couldn't deny how refreshing your presence was. Not to be a jerk, but usually, the girls either were all over him or judged every single move he made. You were just that easygoing.

"Well, I don't think you came here to sulk on the sofa all night long. Why don't we join them by the pool and down some shots?" You hopped off of your seat, pointing to the glass doors. All the boys were waving at you two and suddenly, Suna felt a wave of joy run down his body.

Atsumu was right. Best girl ever.

At some point of the night, everything became about you.

All he could hear was the sound of your voice and all the time, his eyes were drawn to your figure. He couldn't figure out a reason for it, but the rapper wasn't complaining either.

A sharp pang at the side of Suna's head broke the trance he was in. Osamu had a shit eating grin on his face, eyeing the ravenette with amusement.

"We told ya so." The younger twin mused whilst he handed a long neck of vodka to the other.

"Stop. This is dumb."

"Yer dumb. But you ain't that dumb ta dare ta mess with her." The gray-haired Miya squinted at him, menacingly pointing the bottle in his hand at the brunette. The latter shrugged it off, opening his drink.

"Nah, I'm good." And he meant it.

But how could he explain the situation he was in?

Lips and hands wandered over the expanse of his skin. Everything was too hot and too good at the same time. Overwhelming, even.

He wanted more, more and more. There wasn't enough of you.

And if it wasn't unfair enough, his body felt lethargic. He was desperate, but couldn't keep up with the rhythm you imposed. Be it the alcohol or the stress, his body gave up and blacked out, even before you could undress each other.

In the morning after, a pounding headache woke him up. Suna didn't dare to open his eyes, but the morning breath fanning over his face was unbearable.

"I can't believe a cutie like you have a stinky breath like this." The complaint came out in a raspy voice, accompanied by an annoyed grunt.

Someone snickered on the other side of the room.

"Man, I didn't know you had the hots fer Samu." Atsumu was somewhere across the room, laughing at him.

"WHAT THE FUCK?" Hearing the other, Suna's body jolted, dizziness made his head spin in the process. He felt sick in the stomach and the morning light made his eyes sting. "When did I get back here?" The male looked around, realizing he was sprawled over Akagi's floor, right beside Osamu, who didn't even squirm at the loud voices in the room.

"What do ya mean? We never left" Atsumu frowned, uncaping a water bottle he was holding "Ya puked on Kita and passed out. The boys were too wasted ta drag yer sorry ass back home so we all crashed here." The blonde was dumbfounded, trying to figure out how wasted Suna got last night.

Suna wanted to know too. After all, there was no way the events envolving you were a product of his drunk mind.

facts:

• Suna's artist name is yosemite.

• He has a Tesla Model S because of Frank Ocean.

• He takes his Nikes very seriously.

• No, not all of his songs are about the car and the kicks.

• He and the Miya twins got a sports scholarship because of volleyball, but they dropped out of school to make music.

• The three of them created Inarizaki, the label they're making music under. Kita and Aran manage it.

• Both Miya twins are beatmakers and music producers. They recently debuted as artists and now are making a collab EP with Suna, thus Atsumu's concern about the album.

[thewidowsghost]

The Unknown Muggleborn - Chapter 8

3rd Person POV

Later that night, (Y/n) crawls under her covers to go to sleep; Marvel lies her small head on (Y/n)'s chest.

"'Night, girl," (Y/n) murmurs, drowsily scratching behind the cat's ears.

. . .

A few hours later, Marvel lifts her head, nuzzling (Y/n)'s face to try to wake her up. She lets out a whimper, pawing (Y/n)'s face.

The girl was sweating and her neck was resting at an awkward angle. Her breath had quickened and her eyes were moving rapidly under her closed eyelids.

Marvel jumps off the bed and streaks into Hermione's room. Hermione had always been a light sleeper, so when the cat jumped onto her bed, she wakes.

Marvel meows, and Hermione's head tilts in concern.

"What's wrong, Marvel?" Hermione asks and the black-and-white feline paws at Hermione's hand and jumps off the bed, stopping at the door, then looking back at the brunette.

What a peculiar cat, Hermione thinks, throwing back the covers and following the cat across the hall to her sister's room.

Marvel streaks over and onto the bed, her green eyes wide as she tries to nudge her companion awake again.

Realization and fear dawn in Hermione's eyes and she walks across the room and switches on (Y/n)'s bedside slight before placing a hand on her sister's shoulder, shaking it roughly.

"Come on," Hermione murmurs. "You've got to wake up."

(Y/n)'s eyes flash open, and she sits up in her bed, her eyes closed, head leaning against the headboard, her hands trembling.

Hermione sits down on the edge of (Y/n)'s bed, and takes her sister's hands in her own.

(Y/n) looks up, her eyes wide with shock - and a bright silver.

Hermione looks at her sister and (Y/n) subconsciously moves over and Hermione slides under the covers, her back leaning against the other half of (Y/n)'s pillow.

(Y/n) leans against Hermione's shoulder; Hermione, used to these nightmares, remains silent.

After a few minutes, she reaches over and turns off the bedside light.

(Y/n) turns on her side, her head resting on the pillow, and Hermione does the same.

. . .

(Y/n) and Hermione don't talk about the nightmare the night before as the two go about the rest of the break leading up until Christmas.

After breakfast Christmas morning, (Y/n), Hermione, and their parents walk into the living room.

"You girls want to pass out gifts?" Mrs. Granger asks and (Y/n) and Hermione nod.

After passing out the gifts, (Y/n) settles back down at her place in front of the couch. (Y/n) pulls the wrapping paper off one from Fred, and sitting on top was a card. It said:

(Y/n), Somebody got this picture of your first Quidditch match, I thought you'd like it.

- Fred

Lifting up the card, (Y/n) smiles seeing a picture in a frame. It was a picture of Fred and George lifting her up onto their shoulders after her first Quidditch match.

(Y/n) sets the picture and card beside her before picking up a gift from Harry. She smiles when she sees a Advanced Charms book and a book on Magical Creatures.

(Y/n) looks over at Hermione as the brunette at her side opens her gift. (Y/n) had given her sister a copy of Hogwarts: A History.

"I have a copy already," Hermione says, turning to (Y/n).

"There's a charm on it," (Y/n) explains. "Whenever something important in Hogwarts' history, it get's copied down in here. Look," (Y/n) says, opening a page. It says, October 31, 1991 - Hermione Granger, (Y/n) (L/n), Harry Potter, Ronald Weasley, defeated a mountain troll in a girls toilet.

Hermione stares down at the book and a smile slowly spreads across her face. "This is really cool! I love it! But that's not how that went," Hermione says.

"Ah, but it's better than what actually happened," (Y/n) argues. "That was not my best birthday."

(Y/n) grabs another gift, pulls the paper off, and finds a box of chocolate frogs from Harry, and she sets them aside, promising to have one later.

One of (Y/n)'s last gifts is a package wrapped in glossy blue paper with wolves printed on it.

(Y/n),

Happy Christmas! I'm very proud of what you have accomplished at Hogwarts in such a short amount of time.

-Love,

Uncle Remus

(Y/n) gazes down at the card, a small smile on her face. Then she sets the card at her side and looks at the contents of the box. Inside was a small stuffed wolf with a tag on it's ear that read - (Y/n)'s first stuffed animal, a gift from Uncle Remus. Under that was a new stack of photos that (Y/n) promises herself to look at later.

(Y/n) opens a package and finds a red sweater with a silver (First Initial) on it. Under the sweater was a large box of homemade fudge and a letter.

(Y/n), My sons Ron, Fred, and George have told me a lot about you. My husband, Arthur, and I wish to meet you soon. Happy Christmas! -Molly Weasley

Grinning, (Y/n) pulls the sweater over her head and the four finishing opening all their gifts, both (Y/n) and Hermione take all their things upstairs.

3rd Person POV - with Harry - A few hours earlier

On Christmas Eve, Harry goes to bed looking forward for the next day for the food and the fun, but not expecting any presents at all. When he wakes early in the morning, however, the first thing he sees is a small pile of packages at the foot of his bed.

"Merry Christmas," says Ron sleepily as Harry scrambles out of bed and pulls on his bathrobe.

"You, too," says Harry. "Will you look at this? I've got some presents!"

"What did you expect, turnips?" says Ron, turning to his own pile, which is a lot bigger than Harry's.

Harry picks up the top parcel. It is wrapped in thick brown paper and and scrawled across it was to Harry, from Hagrid. Inside is a roughly cut wooden flute. Hagrid had obviously whittled it himself; Harry blows it - it sounded a bit like an owl.

A second, very small parcel contains a note. We received your message and enclose your Christmas present. From Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia. Taped to the note is a fifty-pence piece.

"That's friendly," says Harry.

Ron seems fascinated by the fifty pence, "Weird!" he exclaims. "What a shape! This is money!"

"You can keep it," says Harry, laughing at how pleased Ron is. "Hagrid and my aunt and uncle - so who sent these?"

"I think I know who that one's from," says Ron, turning a bit pink and pointing to a very lumpy parcel. "My mom. I told her you didn't expect any presents and - oh, no," he groans, "she's made you a Weasley sweater."

Harry had torn open the parcel to find a thick, hand-knitted sweater in emerald green and a large box of homemade fudge.

"Every year she makes us a sweater," says Ron, unwrapping his own, "and mine's always maroon."

"That's really nice of her," says Harry, trying the fudge, which was very tasty.

Harry's next present also contains candy - a large box of Chocolate Frogs from Hermione which Harry thought was kind of funny because he had gotten (Y/n) the same thing.

Harry's next parcel was from (Y/n). Opening it, he sees a small box. Feeling curious, Harry opens the box to see a couple of photos. One was of a raven haired man with amber eyes, Harry's father, and a red haired women with emerald green eyes, his mother. The two are standing with a (M/H/C) haired women, (Y/n)'s mum; all three were smiling.

Harry looks at another picture of two kids, probably about a year old. One was a boy with raven hair and emerald eyes, the other was a girl with (H/C) and green eyes - Harry himself and (Y/n).

Then, Harry sees a piece of paper sitting in the box.

Hey Harry,

I found these pictures in the box my godfather left me and I made a few copies. I figured you'd want them.

-Love,

(Y/n)

Harry smiles and picks up the final present. He picks it up and feels it. It's very light, he thinks, and he unwraps it.

Something fluid and silvery gray goes slithering to the floor where it lies in gleaming folds and Ron gasps.

"What is it?"

Harry picks up the shining, silvery cloth off the floor. It's strange to the touch, like water woven into material.

"It's an Invisibility Cloak," says Ron, a look of awe on his face. "I'm sure it is - try it on."

Harry throws the cloak around his shoulders and Ron gives a yell.

"It is! Look down!"

Harry looks down at his feet, but they are gone. He dashes to the mirror. Sure enough, his reflection looks back at him, just his head suspended in midair, his body completely invisible. He pulls the cloak over his head and his reflection vanishes completely.

"There's a note!" says Ron suddenly. "A note fell out of it!"

Harry pulls off the cloak ans seizes the letter. Written in narrow, loopy writing he had never seen before were the following words:

Your father left this in my possession before he died. It is time it was returned to you.

Use it well

A very Merry Christmas to you

There is no signature; Harry stares at the note, while Ron is admiring the cloak.

"I'd give anything for one of these," Ron says. "Anything. What's the matter?"

"Nothing," says Harry. He fells very strange. Who had sent the cloak? Had it really once belonged to his father? he thinks.

Before he can say - or think - of anything else, but the dormitory door is flung open and Fred and George Weasley bounds in. Harry stuffs the cloak quickly out of sight. He doesn't fell like sharing it with anyone else yet.

"Merry Christmas!"

"Hey, look — Harry's got a Weasley sweater, too!"

Fred and George are wearing blue sweaters, one with a large yellow F on it,the other a G.

"Harry's is better than ours, though," says Fred, holding up Harry's sweater. "She obviously makes more of an effort if you're not family."

"Why aren't you wearing yours, Ron?" George demands. "Come on, get it on, they're lovely and warm."

"I hate maroon," Ron moans halfheartedly as he pulls it over his head.

"You haven't got a letter on yours," George observes. "I suppose she thinks you don't forget your name. But we're not stupid — we know we're called Gred and Forge."

"What's all this noise?"

Percy Weasley sticks his head through the door, looking disapproving. He had clearly gotten halfway through unwrapping his presents as he, too, carries a lumpy sweater over his arm, which Fred seizes.

"P for prefect! Get it on, Percy, come on, we're all wearing ours, even Harry got one."

"I — don't — want —" says Percy thickly, as the twins force the sweater over his head, knocking his glasses askew.

"And you're not sitting with the prefects today, either," demands George."Christmas is a time for family."

They frog-march Percy from the room, his arms pinned to his side by his sweater.

Harry had never in all his life had such a Christmas dinner. A hundred fat, roast turkeys; mountains of roast and boiled potatoes; platters of chipolatas;tureens of buttered peas, silver boats of thick, rich gravy and cranberry sauce —and stacks of wizard crackers every few feet along the table. These fantastic party favors were nothing like the feeble Muggle ones the Dursleys usually bought, with their little plastic toys and their flimsy paper hats inside. Harry pulls a wizard cracker with Fred and it didn't just bang, it went off with a blast like a cannon and engulfed them all in a cloud of blue smoke, while from the inside exploded a rear admiral's hat and several live, white mice. Up at the High Table, Dumbledore had swapped his pointed wizard's hat for a flowered bonnet,and is chuckling merrily at a joke Professor Flitwick had just read him.

Flaming Christmas puddings follow the turkey. Percy nearly breaks his teeth on a silver Sickle embedded in his slice. Harry watches Hagrid getting redder and redder in the face as he calls for more wine, finally kissing Professor McGonagall on the cheek, who, to Harry's amazement, giggles and blushes, her top hat lopsided.

When Harry finally leaves the table, he is laden down with a stack of things out of the crackers, including a pack of non-explodable, luminous balloons, a Grow Your-Own-Warts kit, and his own new wizard chess set. The white mice had disappeared and Harry has a nasty feeling they were going to end up as Mrs.Norris's Christmas dinner.

Harry and the Weasleys spent a happy afternoon having a furious snowball fight on the grounds. Then, cold, wet, and gasping for breath, they return to the fire in the Gryffindor common room, where Harry breaks in his new chess set by losing spectacularly to Ron. Harry suspects he wouldn't have lost so badly if Percy hadn't tried to help him so much.

After a meal of turkey sandwiches, crumpets, trifle, and Christmas cake, everyone feels too full and sleepy to do much before bed except sit and watch Percy chase Fred and George all over Gryffindor Tower because they'd stolen his prefect badge.

It had been Harry's best Christmas day ever. Yet something had been nagging at the back of his mind all day. Not until he climbs into bed is he free to think about it: the Invisibility Cloak and whoever had sent it.

Harry leans over the side of his own bed and pulls the cloak out from under it. His father's ... this had been his father's. He lets the material flow over his hands, smoother than silk, light as air. Use it well, the note had said.He has to try it, now. He slips out of bed and wrapped the cloak around himself. Looking down at his legs, he sees only moonlight and shadows. It's a very funny feeling.Use it well.Suddenly, Harry feels wide-awake. The whole of Hogwarts is open to him in this cloak. Excitement floods through him as he stands there in the dark and silence. He can go anywhere in this, anywhere, and Filch would never know.

Ron grunts in his sleep. Should Harry wake him? Something holds him back— his father's cloak — he felt that this time — the first time — he wants to use it alone. Harry creeps out of the dormitory, down the stairs, across the common room, and climbs through the portrait hole.

"Who's there?" squawks the Fat Lady. Harry says nothing. He walks quickly down the corridor.

Harry, his heart racing, and thought. And then it came to him. The Restricted Section in the library. He'd be able to read as long as he liked, as long as it took to find out who Flamel was. He sets off, drawing the Invisibility Cloak tight around him as he walked.The library is pitch-black and very eerie. Harry lights a lamp to see his way along the rows of books. The lamp looks as if it was floating along in midair,and even though Harry can feel his arm supporting it, the sight gives him the creeps.

The Restricted Section is right at the back of the library. Stepping carefully over the rope that separates these books from the rest of the library, he held up his lamp to read the titles. They didn't tell him much. Their peeling, faded gold letters spelled words in languages Harry couldn't understand. Some had no title at all. One book has a dark stain on it that looked horribly like blood. The hairs on the back of Harry's neck prickled. Maybe he was imagining it, maybe not, but he thought a faint whispering was coming from the books, as though they knew someone was there who shouldn't be. Harry had to start somewhere. Setting the lamp down carefully on the floor, he looked along the bottom shelf for an interesting-looking book. A large black and silver volume caught his eye. He pulls it out with difficulty, because it was very heavy, and, balancing it on his knee, lets it fall open.

A piercing, bloodcurdling shriek splits the silence — the book is screaming! Harry snaps it shut, but the shriek goes on and on, one high, unbroken, earsplitting note. He stumbles backward and knocks over his lamp, which went out at once. Panicking, he heard footsteps coming down the corridor outside —stuffing the shrieking book back on the shelf, he runs for it. He passes Filch in the doorway; Filch's pale, wild eyes looked straight through him, and Harry slips under Filch's outstretched arm and streaks off up the corridor, the book's shrieks still ringing in his ears.

Harry comes to a sudden halt in front of a tall suit of armor. He has been so busy getting away from the library, he hadn't paid attention to where he was going.Perhaps because it's dark, he didn't recognize where he was at all. There is a suit of armor near the kitchens, he knew, but he must be five floors above there.

"You asked me to come directly to you, Professor, if anyone was wandering around at night, and somebody's been in the library — Restricted Section."

Harry feels the blood drain out of his face. Wherever he is, Filch must know a shortcut, because his soft, greasy voice is getting nearer, and to his horror, it's Snape who replies, "The Restricted Section? Well, they can't be far, we'll catch them."

Harry stands rooted to the spot as Filch and Snape come around the corner ahead. They can't see him, of course, but it is a narrow corridor and if they come much nearer, they'd knock into him - the cloak didn't stop him from being solid.

Harry backs away as quickly as he can. A door stands ajar to his left. It's my only hope, Harry thinks. He squeezes through it, holding his breath, trying to to move it, and to his relief, he manages to get inside the room without their noticing anything. They walk straight past, and Harry leans against the wall, breathing deeply, listening to their footsteps dying away. They had been close, very close, It is a few seconds before he notices anything about the room he his hidden in.

It looks like an unused classroom. The dark shapes of desks and chairs are piled against the walls, and there is an upturned wastepaper basket — but propped against the wall facing him was something that didn't look as if it belonged there, something that looked as if someone had just put it there to keep it out of the way.

It is a magnificent mirror, as high as the ceiling, with an ornate gold frame,standing on two clawed feet. There is an inscription carved around the top: Erised stra ehru oyt ube cafru oyt on wohsi.

His panic fading now that there is no sound of Filch and Snape, Harry moves nearer to the mirror, wanting to look at himself but see no reflection again; he steps in front of it.

He has to clap his hands to his mouth to stop himself from screaming. He whirls around, his heart pounding far more furiously than when the book had screamed - for he had not seen only himself in the mirror, but a whole crowd of people standing right behind him.

But the room is empty. Breathing very fast, he turns slowly back to the mirror.

There he is, reflected in it, white ans scared-looking, and there, reflected behind him, are at least ten others. Harry looks over his shoulder - but still, no one is there. Or are they invisible, too? Is his, in fact, in a room full of invisible people and this mirrors trick is that it reflects them, invisible or not?

Harry looks in the mirror again. A woman is standing right behind his reflection is smiling at him and waving. He reaches out a hand and feels the air behind him. If she is really there, he would touch her, their reflections are so close together, but he only feels air - she and the others exist only in the mirror.

She is a very pretty woman. Dark red hair and her eyes, emerald green eyes. Harry edges closer to the to the glass. Bright green - exactly the same shape as Harry's, but then he notices that she is crying; smiling, but crying at the same time. The tall, thin, black-haired man standing next to her put his arm around her. He wears glasses and his hair is very untidy. It sticks up at the back, just as Harry's does.

Harry is so close to the mirror that his nose is nearly touching that of his reflection.

"Mom?" he whispers. "Dad?"

They just look at him, smiling. And slowly, Harry looks into the faces of the other people in the mirror, and sees other pairs of green eyes like his, other noses like his, even a little old man, who looks as though he as Harry's knobbly knees - he is looking at his entire family for the first time in his life.

The Potters smile and wave at Harry and he stares hungrily hack at them, his hands pressed flat against the glass as though he is hopping to fall right through it and reach them. He has a powerful kind of ache inside him, half joy, half terrible sadness.

How long he stands there, he doesn't know. The reflections do not fade and he looks and looks until a distant noise brings him back to his senses. He can't stay here, he has to find a way back to his bed. He tears his eyes away from his mother's face, whispers, "I'll come back," and hurries from the room.

Harry does for the next two nights and Dumbledore had found Harry the last night. Dumbledore had told Harry the purpose of the mirror, to show the deepest desire of their hearts.

Dumbledore had convinced Harry not to go looking for the Mirror of Erised again, and for the rest of the Christmas holidays the Invisibility Cloak stays folded at the bottom of his trunk. Harry wishes he could forget what he'd seen in the mirror as easily, but he can't He starts having nightmares. Over and over a again he dreams of his parents disappearing in a flash of green light, while a high voice crackles with laughter. What Harry didn't know, was that (Y/n) was having the same dreams. Repetition from the one on Christmas Eve night.

"You see, Dumbledore was right, that mirror could drive you mad," says Ron, when Harry tells them about these dreams.

Word Count: 3759 words

[guigz1-coldwar]

'Our scars': New chapter for "Redemption in a Spirit in a Cold War" is out !

"Our scars"

"We all have a story to tell about our scars, aren't we?"

Chapter Summary: Yirina woke up after facing again a very recent memory of her life, her state looking better on the outside but still struggling on the inside...

Link of the Picrew used !

To read it on AO3, click here!

Words : +3100

Taglist : @snowgoldwaylon , @clxudtea , @efingart

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That music...it was staying in my head as I was having a feeling to have heard it before in my life, was it...the brainwashing...or something else? No, it had to be the brainwashing, the music was like echoing inside my head, like torture to me even if I was no longer reliving that memory but it all suddenly stop when my eyes slowly opened, breaking me off my sleep for the night. I passed my fingers through my eyelids to speed up the process of having a better vision and discovering which time it was now, the room still darkened with a bit of light coming from the outside.

When I moved my head slightly to look at my nightstand, I realized that I woke early...at 5:47 AM, never managed to get awake at that time and it caused me to sigh, only wanting to go back to sleep as Park was still holding me with her arms, her right hand still well-positioned above my heart. It was bringing me a little smile to have her with me and I wanted to go back into my sleeping mood but there was a little something that was avoiding me as if I didn't want to reface a memory like this...

Slowly realizing that I couldn't close my eyes in fear, seeing myself on that chair while either Stitch or Freya tormenting me for my choices, I decided to get myself up from bed even if it wasn't the time for that, gently removing Park's arms to let her sleep peacefully, and then, gathering my clothes that were still on the ground at my side of the bed to dress up, now wondering what I was going to do: breakfast? Stay on the couch?

It was when I put up my pants that my look got back on the nightstand where I could see Lazar's diary that I didn't look at it for days...since we came back to London from Verdansk, Park having read it all before I had to save her in that bar and since, I didn't read it because I was scared but now, I was curious, curious to see what was written in it. So, when I was finished and ready to get out, I took the diary with me before heading out.

Having it in my hands and it was like I was holding a big weight in my hands, given to what could be written & told inside it about some details I never knew about Lazar. Instead of going directly to get something to eat & drink, I walked to the living room main couch, installing myself on it and I was uncertain to actually open it as what Park saw caused what she did that night but...I needed to know, Lazar was a brother to me...so, I took a deep breath...and I opened it to the next page...

--------------------------------------------

Eleazar 'Lazar' Azoulay

1980

Today was a different and weird day to live for me, not because of my status or what I'm fighting for but for things that I will never have to do in my life, the risks we're taking to preserve our interests but also, to preserve what I'm standing for and what I want to believe.

A while ago, there were some rumors of people getting beheaded by a mysterious person and that case was very special to me as it was the first time I was facing such atrocities that a human can do to another one and it shakes me when I learned that it was one of us do.

She used to be called 'Madam Shell', a top MI6 agent that went rogue recently, known to kill some of her victims in particularly gruesome ways, including beheading, and today, I managed to find her in Cyprus all by myself.

My thoughts wanted at first to capture her and bring her to the MI6 for her crimes but something inside of me was saying that it couldn't bring justice for those who suffered from her, so instead of letting her do her life, I did exactly what she did to others: I beheaded her and threw her head in a river.

I know that it was gruesome for me, putting myself into questions of the things I'm doing for the others but I know myself that it was necessary, a sort of poetic justice. I did what's good for me but doing this kinda makes me question my own behavior.

Was I myself becoming someone I don't want to be?

----------------------------------------------

It was the first page I saw, the next one as a lot of pages were not here, having been teared up and it was talking about what he did to the person who made Park's neck scar and...it kinda brought a tear to my eyes to see that from him, it was something that put himself to question who he was...it was just troubling to see his writing and his diary after all these years away...troubling...

"Shit, I'm sorry, Laz'," I apologized, closing the diary with my hands along with my both eyes as if that memory I relived with Stitch put back my responsibility in Lazar's fate.

"Yirina?" Park's voice came inside the room, surprising me on my seat, like sending chills in me to hear her voice now. "It's almost 6 AM, why are you awake?" She asked me as she stepped inside, making me turn my head around to see that she was just wearing a simple long shirt with nothing covering her legs and feet.

"I woke up earlier, had a little nightmare," I replied to her, keeping my left hand above the cover of Lazar's diary as Park arrived at my sight in front of me. "You don't have to worry about it," I tried to lie but her face knew that she was seeing through me.

"What's wrong?" She demanded, walking to sit next to me on the couch before her eyes went on Lazar's diary. "You...you read it?" She chuckled at its sight.

"Just one page, just one," I whispered, taking a look at the diary before I decided to put it gently on the little table in the middle of the living room. "The page where he explained his vision on that day that he killed the one who...did it," I explained, my left hand pointing out at her scar on her neck.

"Madam Shell," She muttered, her look still on the diary. "I remember when I talked to you two about it...a few moments before we kissed," She said, remembering that perfectly, one of my first memories I recovered. "I wasn't even sure to talk about it freely, even with you,"

"You said that you weren't proud of it at that time," I remembered her words about it, feeling the pain that she had to face to talk of it. "I don't remember everything but what I could remember was a woman who managed to talk freely about it," I complimented, looking at her with a little smile on my face and her reaction was to put her eyes on me, returning a smile to me.

"I was just opening myself but thanks for it, Yiri," She grinned at me as she was holding her head with her right hand, her elbow on the backrest. "I'm getting over that part of my life but I can't still show it to the others that aren't you," She added in a low voice, her left hand posing slowly and lovely on my lap.

"If you don't want to show it, don't show it," I advised, not wanting to force herself in it. "Me, I got things that I can't hide," I stated, mentioning my scar on my head and the other's one.

"I like it, even if...well, you know," She told me, her voice meaning it despite the context of how I got it.

"Thanks but like you, I'm trying to get over it with no actual possibility to hide it," I snorted, scratching my chin with my right hand. "We all have a story to tell about our scars, aren't we?" I suggested to Park.

"Yes but I'm not sure that some will actually want to know about it if they don't ask," She responded, her left hand moving up along my shirt to get above my heart as she did in the night. "All of our scars are saying a story but are we willing to share them?" She asked, biting her top lip at me but I only raised my shoulders to her, couldn't know how to answer to it.

"If only between me & you, yes but with the others, can't tell," I decided nonetheless to give a little answer to her as she was looking rather curious. "Even if we both know about them, telling them to each other can maybe bring us more closer," I thought of it and she nodded at me.

"Of course," She agreed. "It isn't just thanks to our scars that the two of us are together but yeah, they helped to get us in each other's arms," She affirmed, her left fingers making some little circles around my heart. "As we're up, do you want something? Coffee?" She demanded.

"Well, I just want a coffee and...maybe I would get back on the bed to think freely," I replied, wanting to return to bed for having some clear thoughts.

"Don't move, I'll give you one," She ordered before she landed a soft kiss on my right cheek, and then, going back on her feet to walk towards the kitchen direction.

My mind was getting a bit confused about having to relive that memory with Stitch in that base even at this moment on the couch during my talk with Park of the marks that were on our bodies and inside, I know that there was a little struggling between not thinking of that dream or even about that music that was still getting heard through the very back of my head, almost going to moves my lips according to the song but I managed to hold on.

"Two coffees," Park spoke up as she was coming back in the room with two cups of coffee in both hands, me moving my arms to grab the one she was holding in her right hand.

"Thanks," I said in a low voice after grabbing the white cup in the palm of my hand, feeling the heat of the coffee inside of it and the white smoke coming out.

"You're good?" Park asked me as she got to sit back next to me, holding her own black cup with a little British flag on it in her left hand.

"I was thinking about the memory I relived," I responded to her before taking a little taste of the coffee...milk & sugar...as I love it...

"Can you tell me about it?" She questioned me obviously, knowing well that I was going to tell her about it anyway.

"It was like before: tied up to a chair in Verdansk and facing Stitch," I started, putting my both hands around my cup and looking at it. "Torturing me to make me speak, wondering why I was working with you and managing to know the reason...you," I continued, slowly turning my head around to look at her, taking a sip.

"I'm sorry," She apologized, moving her right hand behind my left shoulder.

"It wasn't your fault, not at all," I reassured her about that before looking back at my cup. "He was forcing me to listen to music non-stop, drugging me and trying to make myself responsible for what happened to Lazar," I added, a knot in my chest to pronounce these words as my right eye could see Park stopping in her moves. "Stitch wanted to give me back something I managed to get over,"

"It was never your fault, Yiri, you know that," Park said, keeping her hand on me and I was processing that sentence in my head, wanting to make sure that it was staying...it wasn't my fault. "We...well...no, we can't talk about this," She cut herself numerous times and I wasn't reacting to her as she was right.

"Was it something the CIA did?" I asked her like that, referring to the music.

"What?" She raised both eyebrows to me in a curious way as I wasn't very specific.

"Listening to music, was it something that the CIA used for me?" I clarified my question, wanting to make it clear. "Like...for the brainwashing or the normal interrogations methods?" I gasped at talking about it as normal for me.

"Yes, Adler used it on you...was it...'Staying alive'?" She guessed right as I nodded to her, giving me an answer about one of the things CIA did. "Shit, how did they know about that?"

"Perseus managed to get their hands on some CIA files about me and the MK-Ultra project, surely to either break the brainwashing...or to make a new one," I answered as that part was never put in front of our discussions since we got free. "They wanted to make a new one...and they did worse," I snorted, quickly passing my hand below my nose. "These memories, I don't even remember them...like if they tried to make me forget about it,"

"And somehow, you're living them again," Park thought, moving her hand on the top of my shoulder as I took a sip from my coffee.

"Did they hurt you, you know, after I broke?" I asked her about it, fearing the worst as remembering the day I broke down in front of Freya & Stitch was like falling headfirst from a building.

"Yes, they did," She said, causing me to gasp in sadness, closing my eyes but quickly open them back as I didn't want to see pictures of Park getting hurt in my head. "It was either Stitch or Freya but she was the one doing it the most, it was...more mentally than physically,"

"What did they do?" I chuckled at asking that.

"Freya was angry, wondering why I was playing with you as she was sure that you were loving her but as I was the one to fuck up your life," She alleged, her hands trembling as she put her black cup down on the table in front of us. "She was right for a part but...she wanted to make me realize that I was only here to brutalize you, to make you weak, and to make you forget about her true feelings," She added, sounding like she was going to cry to tell that.

"I don't know what happened but she's seeming obsessed with me as if she couldn't live without having me around," I stated, my right fingers delicately scratching the side of my cup before I decide to finish it entirely. "We got raised like sisters but...she was ready to sacrifice everything and even her relation with Sonya to have me back," I mentioned before putting my cup away on the table.

"Yeah," Park breathed in a very low voice before I turned around to look at her, hiding her face with her hands.

"You're alright?" I asked her and she slowly moves her hands to see that she was silently crying, a tear on her face coming out of her eyes.

"No...I...I'm sorry, Yirina," She broke out in tears before moving her arms around me, our conversation having surely done this to her.

"I'm sorry, we shouldn't have talked about this," I told her in her ear as I was getting my arms around her, to comfort her. "Do you want to go back to bed with me?" I proposed to her.

"Yes, please...please," She pleaded with me but as I wanted to go up with her, she wasn't moving at all from her spot, looking paralyzed on the couch.

I couldn't let her like that so I decided to take her in my arms, holding her in them and getting her bare feet off the ground before starting to walk away from the couch with her inside my arms, hers getting wrapped around my neck to stay well and be sure that she wasn't going to fall on the ground along the way, something that no one wants here, holding her was like seeing myself back when we were escaping Perseus with Sonya's help.

A few seconds later, we reached out our bedroom, opening with one of my free hands the door before moving to Park's side of the bed where I put her on it before I decided to install myself back at my side, staying now with her and cuddling her from behind as the sounds of her cries were still heard in my ears, resisting to not cry.

"I'm sorry, Yirina for what I did," She continued, feeling herself again guilty about everything.

"It's okay, I forgive you, you're forgiven," I reassured her as my arms around her were holding her softly and gently, not wanting to give her much harm. "I can't blame you,"

"You have to blame me, I was there with Adler," She stated in a raised broken voice against me but my only reaction was to only close my eyes and put my head against the back of her neck. "I was there, I helped him,"

"You're forgiven, Park," I repeated to her, giving a comforting kiss on her neck, myself resisting to not cry despite her owns. "You're an amazing person, I know it, Zasha knows it, Portnova knows it, you're amazing," I told her, telling the whole truth to her, she was amazing.

"Rea-Really?" She muttered, my right hand slowly moving towards her neck to touch along her scar in a comforting way.

"Yes, I love you, people can maybe think badly about you but you don't care, I'm here for you," I said in a very serious voice, feeling her skin & scar on my fingers, realizing that it was my first time been the one to comfort. "I love you, that's the main thing here," I affirmed, finally removing any space between us. "For me, you're the best person I've met," I confessed and her reaction was to turn around by herself against me.

"Really, you do think of it?" She demanded in a low voice, her hands slowly crossing to touch my cheeks and I nodded slowly but surely and to add, I kissed her on the lips, proving to her that I was meaning it at 100%

"Yes, you're the one I love, the one I'm protecting," I confirmed after the kiss before I moved my arms around for a big hug, getting my right hand behind her head that was now next to her, wanting to feel her secured with me...

"Don't worry, no one will hurt you with me, no one, you're a good person,"

[gemsofthegalaxy]

5, 11, and 17 for the fic ask :)

5: Share a snippet that you’re proud of from an upcoming fic/chapter.

Ooh i have a stucky fic I need to fix up and post today so. I'll just edit that now and put something here,

Natasha takes a swig of water from a dark red metal bottle and twists the cap back on, the nail on her pointer finger glittering in the sunlight.

“Okay. Which one of you is going to be my wingman tonight?” Natasha asks, and Bucky and Sam look at each other.

“You’re trying to tear this family apart,” Steve mutters.

“Someone’s gotta do it,” Natasha lifts a shoulder.

“Clearly I’m the best candidate,” Sam says, voice certain.

I just think it's really funny and cute and I want to showcase their in-jokes and dynamics so. :> unfortunately now I need to think of a goddang title.

11: Which OC of yours do you think is the most similar to you? Which OC is the most different? Why?

HUH... not me being completely unable to think of any OC except the ones from More Than Survive. Most of my OCs are fan children who are often badass and go on adventures, or literal 6 year olds, which ain't really me.

So.. with Adah, and we're pretty different because she's outgoing and a perfectionist and i'm more the Evan Hansen in the situation- super anxious and shy but wanting to make friends. I'm also not like Olive, who is really blunt. I guess I might be most like Jax, who is also anxious, but I don't use weed to cope because I gave Adah my experience of getting really sick from it the first time (don't do drugs. or at least do them responsibly with knowledgeable friends around, kids). I did realize I was bi when I was Jax's age tho! It's a bit hard to say with Olive and Jax because neither of them got really fleshed out, oops.

17: What has been the proudest moment for you so far since you started writing?

Ooh... that's a good question.

I think, getting back into it, actually. And realizing that just because I gave up on a hobby doesn't mean it's not worth doing again.

I can't remember what exactly happened, but when I was legit like 11 years old I used to write fanfic on ff.net, and then I moved on to roleplaying and for at least a while there I was like "I'm just not a writer anymore. I don't do that" but eventually I was like "literally why tho??" and started doing it again.

I'm not a big fan of my earliest works on ao3, they're really weird compared to the genres and styles I write in now, but I'm proud that I got back into it no matter what.

And now even if I take a year long break, I'm more certain that I can just jump back in, that it's not "wasted" time, it's okay if there's an ebb and flow with where I put my creative energy and it doesn't mean I'm not a writer.

[fortunatelyhauntedblackcherry]

Moonshine - A Beetlejuice Fanfiction 10

Warning: swearing, duh, Ouija-boarding, BJ's trust issues

- Are we seriously gonna do this like we were in a goddamn Z category horror movie? - asked Ari, while she rubbed the bridge of her nose. The coffin-table in the living room was decorated with at least 10 huge white candles, and in the middle there was a grey Ouija-board with a bright pink planchette. Sof already dimmed the lights and now was sitting on the floor, legs in criss cross applesauce. Beetlejuice was floating above the coffee table, laughing his ass off at the inscription he read on the planchette: Hey there demons, it's me, ya boy.

- And it's coming from the weird sister... - commented Rei as she folded her hands before her chest. Sof let out an annoyed sigh.

- Shut up, it gives an eerie vibe to the whole thing! I've been dreaming about using this shit for years, let me live my dream guys! - Rei and Ari both looked at each other, sighed, then sit down. Beetlejuice stopped laughing, wipped his laughter-tear filled eyes and rolled over to his belly in the air, legs dangling, hands under his chin. He had a devilish smile on his face and bright, neon green hair, mixed with a couple strikes of yellow. Even though he was excited to communicate with all residents of the house, he was kinda worried the Ouija-board won't work. He's been existing for at least a couple hundred years at that point, but nobody ever tried communicating with him through one of those suckers.

As soon as the girls got comfortable, Sofía cleared her throat.

- Okay, I know Ari knows how to handle this bad boy since we bought it together and had quite a good time while we looked into the use of spirit boards, but I'd like to state some instructions and ground rules. - Ari, Rei and Beetlejuice both nodded in agreement. - Once we start the seance, non of us should lift our fingers off the planchette. If any of us do, it might cause some trouble in the ghostworld. Concentration is essential, so please focus on contacting the dead. We have to take this thing seriously and must act respectfully towards the board and the spirit we deal with, so no frivolous questions.

- PFFFFFF kay, partykiller. - said Beetlejuice as he floated closer to the board. The girls put their pointing fingers on the planchette, breathed out, and looked at each other.

Thoughts were running around in Ari's head. Was this really a good idea? I mean if we can contact our homedemon effectively, I could tell my sisters I could hear him and they won't think I'm crazy. That's why I thought of doing this. But why am I so afraid then?

- Okay so let's start the session by asking simple yes and no questions. - said Sofía, closed her eyes for a bit, then started to talk. She sounded really confident for Beetlejuice, but her sisters noticed how her voice cracked a bit. Was she only nervous, excited, or was she genuinely afraid of what she might contact? - Is anyone here with us? - the planchette didn't move. Sofi let out a huge breath and gulped. Beetlejuice put his pointing finger on the planchette and literally screamed when he realized he could actually touch it. - Channeling the dead isn't easy so it might take some minutes to...

As soon she said that, Beetlejuice moved his finger, and literally yeeted the planchette across the room.

- FUCK I DIDN'T MEAN TO DO THAT!!! - he screamed in a rather girly manner. Rei jumped up from the coffin-table and shook her head.

- That not normal man, a ghosty ghost couldn't do that in any horror movie! - Ari got up too and went to get the planchette. Beetlejuice floated before her.

- Sorry babes, I swear I'll be more gentle next time. Even though I know you looove wild stuff. - Ari replied with an eyeroll as she bowed down for the tiny pink thing. - Holy shit sugar I could imagine several hot scenarios with you in this position.

Ari headed back to the table and put the planchette down.

- Let's continue. - Rei sit back, fixing her glasses and putting her hair up in a messy ponytail. Ari looked at the planchette as she speak the words. - Could you please confirm that you're here? - Beetlejuice, as lightly as he could, put his finger on the pink thingie and moved it to YES.

- NAH MAN THAT'S CRAZY NA-AH I'M OUT! - shouted Rei and started to stand up.

- SIT YOUR ASS BACK DOWN PUTA! - shouted Ari back at her sister. - You said amen to this shit, we're gonna go through with it now. - Beetlejuice chuckled as Rei sit back down with the most panicked look on her face that he had ever seen. He tapped the planchette slightly.

- L-E-T-S-A-L-L-G-E-T-N-A-K-E-D. - Ari let out the the biggest laugh Beetlejuice heard yet. She snapped her head back as she squeaked like a degenerated seal while snorting. - OhmygodslashSatan your bursting laugh is so weird, I love it! - said Beetlejuice with a high voice and full on glowing hair.

- You did that. - stated Sofía, looking at Ari seriously.

- No way José! - she still giggled like crazy as she looked back at her oldest sister. - Looks like our presence is just nasty! - Sofía had a very annoyed and slightly angry expression on her face.

- ANYWAY, no, we are not going to do that.

- W-O-R-T-H-A-T-R-Y. - spelled the board. Sofía threw her hands in the air, annoyed out of words to express her feelings. Rei clicked her tongue.

- What happened to the "don't let go of the planchette" rule? - she asked.

- Shut up. - explained Sofía. She put her fingers back on the pink object before she stated the next question. - Are you a spirit guide? - the planchette moved to NO. - Then are you a ghost? - the planchette moved to NO again. Sofía shook her head in a way people do when they don't understood something.

- Did you ever live on Earth as a human? - asked Rei who calmed herself down enough to ask questions.

- B-R-I-E-F-L-Y-V-E-R-Y-B-R-I-E-F-L-Y. - Sof interrupted with her next question. Something really bugged her.

- Okay then WHAT are you?!

- S-E-X-Y - the girls all threw their hands up. They shared a look, all stating "I can't even" with their eyes. Without either of them touching the planchette, it started to move again on its own. - A-L-S-O-D-I-S-L-E-X-I-C. - Rei snorted.

- This bitch is a fuckin comic. - Sof growled in annoyement.

- No I mean what's in your pants? - she asked. Now neither of them was touching the board. And after a couple of seconds, the board answered.

- M-A-G-I-K-A-N-D-M-I-S-C-H-I-F. - Ari facepalmed, Sofía huffed.

- I can't believe that this thing is fuckin with us... - Beetlejuice could literally see the veins on her neck bulging in anger as he spelled HAHAHA out on the board. She slammed her fists on the table. - NO. TELL ME WHAT YOU ARE, SMARTASS!!!

- I-M-Y-O-R-G-U-I-D-E-T-O-T-H-E-O-T-H-E-R-S-I-D-E.

- Kay that's definitely a demon. - she stated with a huge hand gesture.

- Shit we're busted babe. - said Beetlejuice, sounding a tiny bit worried. Ari gulped.

- Why would you think that? - she asked, acting all naive. Sof pointed at the planchette, which was now moving up and down in the air since Beetlejuice was playing catch with it.

- Cause demonic spirits enjoy using deception and being a dick!

- What a keen observation, Sofía! - stated Beetlejuice, talking sarcastically. - That's built into our nature, you know!

- Let's just... - Sofía sighed midsentence. - ...stop.

- No! This is fun! - proclaimed Ari with the biggest puppy eyes. Classic smallest child trick.

- We are unprepared to deal with dark and negative forces that can wreak havoc in our lives!

- Sofía, let's be frank with each other, he already causes a lot of trouble. - Sof huffed. - At least let me ask his name. - said Ari in a sweet voice with a shy smile. - That would be the polite thing to do. - her eldest sister tried to say something but Ari stifled her speech. - Just one question. Then we can stop.

- That was a son of a bitch thing to do, and you know it. Tricking your sister into letting me tell you my name... That's low babes. - said Beetlejuice while folding his hands and shaking his head, floating next to Ari. - I'm so proud.

- UGH FINE! - said Sofía, while throwing her head back. - Little Miss Pushover. - Ari flashed a toothy grin. That was her moment. She already had a plan how'd she persuade her sisters to accept his offer of helping them out a bit and to say the demon's name 3 times. She cleared her throat and breathed out before she stated her question.

- What is your name?

Beetlejuice breathed in in excitement and grabbed the planchette.

- Welp let's hope it's gonna work this way. Here goes nothing. - the planchette started to move. - B-E-E-J-F-Q-J-E-S-U-S-I-C-A-N-T-S-P-E-L-L-S-H-I-T. - Ari sighed and Rei laughed. Come on Bug, don't be an idiot now!, thought Ari. The object started to slide on the board again. - B-E-E-T-L-E-J-U-I-C-E.

- OKAY GOOD NOW WE KNOW IT'S NAME CAN WE STOP PLEASE?!?! - shouted Rei as she reached for the planchette, but Sofía grabbed her hand.

- Wait. - with her other hand, she pointed at Ari. - Ariadné Rodríguez McLoughlin, you are suspicious, girl. Why did you want to know this demon's name so badly? - Fuck., thought Ari. She didn't think this through. She couldn't answer, she opened her mouth but no voice came out. - Demon, have you communicated with anyone from this group before tonight? - Beetlejuice fumbled through his hair.

- I'm sorry babes. But you wouldn't tell them about your superpower any other way. - he said before the planchette moved to YES. Sof looked straight into Ari's eyes. She hated that cold dead stare.

- Tell me who was it!

- A-R-I. - the oldest sister slapped the desk.

- Please I can explain... - said Ari in a shy, almost inaudible voice. Gosh things were not going the way she imagined they'd go.

- BITCH, I WILL SLAP YOU! - shouted Sofía, clapping after every word.

- Excuse me but... - cut in Rei. She mimicked a closing mouth with her hand. - ...tone! Let the girl speak for herself! - she turned to her sister. - So how long have you been talking with the dead, bitch? - Ari sighed, rolled her eyes then started to talk with very heavy hand movements.

- Let me state that I can only hear him, I've never seen him but we've been talking for weeks now and he's so awesome and funny! I mean he's actually a really nice guy to talk to!

- Ohmygod he's that special someone who's been making you feel better!!! - realized Rei who just slapped her forehead. Beetlejuice was floating beside Ari, giggling to himself. The whole situation was so comical.

- Yeah, we're buddies.

- FOR LYFE YO! - screamed Beetlejuice into Ari's ear.

- Why did I teach you how to use yo, seriously, this is getting out of hand... - she asked the thin air, rubbing the bridge of her nose. She was starting to get a headache.

- Wait you can hear him now? - asked Sofía with a jaw dropped.

- I can hear him all the time when he's near me... So yeah during every minute of the day, kinda. - she stopped for a sec. - You don't think I'm crazy, right?

- I mean we all saw what happened during the seance so nah fam, you good. Weird but good. Gee my sister is a comic book character! - proclaimed Rei excitedly. She even clapped.

- And what does he want? - asked Sofía. She calmed down a bit but her eyes were full of anger.

- Right now, and I quote him singing: "🎶I'm on the bench, but coach, just put me in the game! All you gotta do is say my name. Three times in a row it must be spoken, unbroken.🎶" - she mimicked Beetlejuice as good as she could, she even tried to do his voice. She looked at Rei, who almost had questionmarks for eyes. - Yes, he sounds like that all the time. Like he swallowed a cheesegrater, I know. - Rei nodded understandingly. Sof held her head.

- So he wants to be summoned. - she looked deep into Ari's eyes. She looked so serious. - You know we're not gonna do that, right?

- Why?! He promised he'd help us then just go away! - Sof shook her head but Ari continued. She sounded kinda desperate. - Just imagine, he could actually help us get revenge on our father for being such a prick with our moms! Just let me...

- No. - she stated. - In the Council of Sisters I vote no. - she looked at Rei. - Your vote now.

- Look I... - she sighed and looked at Ari whose eyes were now getting teary. She didn't want to tell her sisters how much she wanted to summon Beetlejuice, not because of his promise, but because how much she liked his company. She didn't have a friend like him in, why would I lie, ever, and she secretly craved his presence in her life. There was finally someone who totally accepted her as how she was, and now her sisters were robbing her of the opportunity of meeting him. - There are always a million reasons not to do something. - Ari covered her mouth with her right palm.

- No, not you, I thought you...

- Girl, we've been swimming with piranhas, we don't need a shark!

Beetlejuice was silent... until this point. He knew how arguments worked. How bloodyminded people were once they decided on something. His hair slowly turned from green to a purplish redish tone. His anger was building up and now it busted.

- And I thought you were special... Not like any other breather. - he spit between his teeth. Ari looked at his direction and shushed her sisters.

- Bug, what do you...

- YOU PROMISED YOU'D SUMMON ME! - screamed Beetlejuice. - YOU PROMISED BUT YOU WON'T! AND I TRUSTED YOU! - Ari stood up and stepped in his direction. She tried to sound calm but Beetlejuice's voice was so angry and frightening...

- Beetlejuice, I will, somehow, just...

- NO YOU WON'T! YOU'RE A LYING BITCH LIKE ANY OTHER HUMAN ON THIS GODDAMN PLANET! - he started to run while cussing at Ari. The girl ran after him, followed by her sisters. As soon as he got to the attic door, which the girls were unable to pry open, he floated through the door and laid head back to it. - I HATE YOU!

- You know that you don't and that that was uncalled for. - Ari sighed while trying to get the door to open. Rei asked if she needed an axe but she refused. - Please, this is hard enough as it is!

- Oh, I’m sorry sweetheart. - answered Beetlejuice in an annoyed way. - I just tend to get a little upset WHEN PEOPLE RUIN MY LIFE! - tears started to run down his cheeks. - FUCK YOU, GET LOST! I NEVER WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN!!!

Beetlejuice heard that Ari stopped trying to open up the door. She sighed and put her hand on the hard wood.

- I'll talk to them. And I'll keep my promise. - her steps faded and as they did, Beetlejuice's hair turned fully dark purple as he started crying. He really trusted her... And he did get that she'd want her sisters to know that she'll summon a demon at their home but why would she betray him like that still? He sniffled to himself as he summoned a sockpuppet.

- 🎶You could use a buddy... Don't you want a pal?🎶 Yes I do! - he put his head on his knees, sniffling hard. - ...yes I do...