#it's twenty to two in the morning
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Okay. As intended: the Clio rambles. This is probably going to be very long and disjointed, but hopefully that is tolerable.
To try and sum them up:
Clio will now have pointed ears once she becomes a Spirit, and I've figured out a way to justify this in the context of what those mean in this series.
I'm fairly confident that I now know when Clio becomes a Spirit, and the circumstances surrounding her doing so. The only thing I'm still slightly missing is how she would actually know how to do it, but the game doesn't exactly explain that when it happens later on to another character, so..
Her story now follows that of the canon KHUX player quite closely, including the bluff at the final battle. A main deviation is that she would have still been hesitant, but ultimately did accept the invitation to the Dandelions, so she comes back with Ephemer and Skuld to gather survivors instead of being one.
The one thing I still don't know at all is how things end - whether I leave Clio in KHUX, or bring her forwards, and if so how and how far.
Okay, now for the actual rambles. Suggestions/comments/criticism/etc. is very much encouraged, because right now I do feel like I'm talking to the wall a bit.
What first started things off, I think, was me trying to justify porting the pointed ears that Clio has in FFXIV back to her original KHUX iteration, because they look cute on her. Both games have characters with these ears, but they mean different things in each one. In FFXIV they're just a natural trait of any Elezen - or Lalafell, but Clio's specifically are because she's half-Elezen there. Conversely, in Kingdom Hearts, they're quite specifically gained from exposure to darkness (or in most characters' cases from being possessed by Xehanort - it's just that he himself is implied to have gained them from darkness exposure in the first place, since he doesn't have pointed ears or golden eyes yet in Dark Road).
Now, Clio is very much not someone who feels the need to use darkness - she has strong light in her heart, and wields it valiantly. So, it wouldn't make very much sense or be very in-character for her to start falling to darkness and gain them as a result of the effect it has on her heart and body. However, as part of the story of my selfship, Clio becomes Aria's Chirithy Spirit (since she was never given one like she should have been, and Clio becoming hers allows her to survive the story). Chirithies are known to be tied to their individual Keyblade wielders, in that if the wielder dies or falls to darkness then so does the Chirithy - so, since Aria is already technically fallen to darkness by virtue of being a Heartless, it makes sense that Clio would also appear to be affected by that darkness (though I don't think she herself would actually become corrupted by it, necessarily - it just looks like she might be). Therefore, I can use that as a reason why Clio has pointed ears, implying darkness exposure, but is still very much a Keyblade wielder of light!
That was the first thing, which then led into the even more rambly part of more general story logistics - specifically, the idea of Clio taking the place of the player in KHUX, but also things like how when and why Clio becomes Aria's Spirit, and what her doing so would mean for her own Chirithy.
To the first part (Clio taking the role of the player): it would be a nice way of giving her more plot importance, as well as making the game’s story itself more important to my selfship’s story. Clio is absolutely the sort of person to make friends with lots of people regardless of their Unions, after all, and it can be fun thinking about how she might interact with the main cast. It also makes the final battle in particular much more fitting: Clio can pull off the trick of being possessed by a true Darkness much more convincingly given that she actually has a supply of darkness to safely draw from - Aria’s.
However, some details would have to be taken into account; firstly, the fact that the player canonically refuses to become a Dandelion, whereas Clio definitely is, to the point that her being one is how Aria is able to reunite with her and make it back to Daybreak Town, as I’ve previously written. However, what I could do in theory is say that, because the two things I wrote as follow-ups to that first piece were both in the Darkling AU, then Clio escaping the war with the Dandelions is also only the case in that AU, leaving the default version of events to line up better with the player’s story in canon where they refuse to join for the sake of those who were not chosen to become Dandelions (which for Clio would absolutely include people like Aria).
This can then in theory lead on to the other big thing I still need to work out, which is how/when/why Clio becomes Aria’s Chirithy/Spirit. For the when and the why.. if Clio is already friends with Skuld and Ephemer like the player is by the time the Keyblade War breaks out, then maybe she can go with them to try and rescue people from the battlefield once it’s all over.. and come across Aria there, as she had been bearing witness to the war but became injured after trying to step in to defend her Nobody counterpart. In the Darkling AU, Aria simply escapes into the realm of darkness at this stage, allowing her injuries to heal and being determined to find her way back to Clio (though being in that realm for too long is what then turns her more into a Darkling). Here, though.. maybe she can be rescued and brought along to where the Dandelions escape to (like the player is in canon, ironically), but is too injured to wake in a world so filled with light, and so Clio decides to (and is somehow able to) dive into her dream - thus becoming a Spirit, in the same way that Riku does much later on? So, that potentially sorts out the Chirithy logistics (albeit I'm not quite sure what would happen to Clio's own Chirithy if she were to become the same type of entity herself).
The other way in which Clio’s story could differ from the canon player’s is at the aforementioned final battle. In the game, the player pretends to be possessed by a true Darkness in order to get Ephemer and Skuld to seal them and four of the true Darknesses away, which leaves the Union leaders with more lifeboats to escape the destruction of the data Daybreak Town. I’ve already said that Clio would be able to bluff this very effectively due to being connected to Aria (who, as a Heartless, is already an entity consumed by darkness), but.. in the game, when this happens, the player taunts the Darknesses before being attacked by them and falling in battle, letting their heart move on and be reborn. And I perhaps understandably don't want that to happen to Clio, unless I say that that's how Arete happens.
At the moment, I'm also not 100% sure what Aria is doing at this time. What currently feels like the most "keeping things consistent with how I had been thinking of them" idea is that Aria takes herself back off into the realm of darkness again to avoid the destruction of the data Daybreak Town, while Clio can then be tangled up with the finale plot alongside the Union leaders, like the canon player - but then when Clio tricks the true Darknesses, she's able to slip out of where she's sealed them thanks to Aria (somehow), so the two can escape via the realm of darkness and subsequently are able to survive together until.. well, maybe Missing Link? When Clio gets out of the darkness but is kept alive/essentially made immortal by Aria still being in there? But, it seems difficult to think that Clio would be able to escape in a way that true Darkness can't, especially if she's going into the realm of darkness to do so. Maybe we can fight them off together? But that's four of the true Darknesses against only two Keyblade wielders, one of which is already a Heartless (and therefore, entity of darkness).. which seems a bit too tricky
Alternatively, if I did stick to giving Clio the player's canon fate.. I'm wondering whether Aria would be able to salvage her heart somehow, preserving her until such a time as the pair can be together again in the light. There's an argument to be made that, as a Spirit and therefore technically a type of Dream Eater, maybe Clio can only appear in Aria's dreams - but Aria doesn't tend to dream in the first place, because I don't. I am still attached to the idea of her being alive and present, though - maybe even ending up on Destiny Islands, to the point of meeting the main/non-KHUX characters. There's still that one piece of writing I haven't finished yet about that. And I can technically do that with Player?? But it's still not clear how they ended up there, honestly..
I think my uncertainly mostly comes from a combination of the following: I don't want to kill Clio off for the sake of sticking to canon, because I don't want things to end with KHUX, but I don't think she would be able to persist in the realm of darkness like Aria does. Maybe I can pull a Nimda and canonically detour her into FFXIV, but I don't really like the sound of that for Clio specifically. So who knows?? I certainly don't!
I think this last part may have to wait until Missing Link is out, and we know how it ties to KHUX more concretely. The timing of how far apart each game is from the others is still up in the air, after all, and seeing how connected the two truly are might maybe help me figure out if I do indeed want to sacrifice self-indulgence (of keeping Clio alive and incorporating her into other games) for narrative satisfaction.
People who know KHUX: please critique. And anyone in general who has something to comment on about this: please also comment.
#heart of the void#info posts#selfshipping#love: crown of clovers (clio)#selfship: of flowers unchained (clio/aria)#of lux and daybreak (union x)#I told you that this would be rambly#self‑insert: darkness' champion (aria)#of flowers unchained: darkling aria AU#friend: transient silver (ephemer)#friend: fate of the future (skuld)#all those were sort of mentioned#how much have i even written here. it's a lot. it's very messy.#it's twenty to two in the morning#if all you want to know are the conclusions then i've put them above the readmore#if you're interested in seeing my reasoning and how I got to those conclusions then that is what is below the readmore#if you have any questions then *please* ask
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Sigh,,,, new AU alert.
This is genuinely so fun though UGH I’m gonna do so many of these
((Pearl is an average sized orca))
If you’re wondering,,, yes,,, shark monster au,,, everyone’s a shark,,,, or like whales or whatever
Silly sea creatures
#art#fanart#my art#original art#Splatoon#Splatoon au#splatoon art#au#au art#splatoon fanart#splatoon Marina#Marina splatoon#marina ida#splatoon Pearl#Pearl splatoon#pearl houzuki#whale shark#killer whale#actually I made Pearl a killer whale because I just got the pun… killer wail…. killer whale…#ha#not sure what to name these#Splatoon…. sea critter au#or just#sea monsters#sea monster au#yes#fuck it#i suck at naming things#it’s five twenty two in the morning I have not had one single night of decent sleep#all because of this. I LOVE THIS
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Quick summary of chapter 119
#tbhk#jshk#doodle#shitpost#That random motivation at like two in the morning#I really sat down and drew this in twenty minutes
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Omega: Crosshair, I need some advice.
Crosshair, eating Nutella straight out of the jar: You’ve come to the right place.
#omega knows her older brothers are kind of disasters but she still looks up to them and seeks out their advice#I strongly headcanon that Crosshair would absolutely fuck UP a jar of Nutella at two in the morning#then wonders why his stomach hurts the next day#I mean the bad batch are basically all twenty something college guys#except for Echo who is a tired grad student who is their TA that basically adopted them#star wars tbb#star wars the bad batch#the bad batch#tbb crosshair#incorrect bad batch quotes#tbb incorrect quotes#tbb omega
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pitched battle inside my brain between the part of me that's desperately shaking myself by the shoulders going "YOU HAVE GOT TO ACTUALLY LIVE THE KIND OF LIFE YOU IMAGINE INSTEAD OF JUST SITTING AROUND IMAGINING IT UNTIL YOU DIE!!" and the part of me that's clutching my face going "is this allowed? is this allowed?? is this allowed???"
#trying to plan a solo cicada pilgrimage and getting brainworms about it yeehaw#'making a lot of plans and never actually doing things in real life' has been a problem for literally as long as I can remember#but I also feel like I've developed a learned helplessness over the last several years that's gotten worse as I've gotten older??#me age twenty: I think I'm gonna take myself to chicago next week because I feel like going to the zoo#me age thirty: am I allowed to go camping alone. am I allowed to do a solo road trip. I need a grownup#to be extremely clear I am very much allowed and this is not justin's fault and I don't know where it comes from#like I'll run things by him lowkey seeking 'permission' that I don't even need and he'll be like 'yeah that sounds good to me'#and then I STILL won't do the thing because like. my brain keeps insisting there needs to be a grownup in charge?? HELLO I'M GROWNUP#anyway I'm doing cicada trip solo BECAUSE-- the drive is so long I want to do five days because two of them will just be driving#and he can't get that much time off work right now#AND because I literally only want to Be Camping and Looking At Bugs but he'd get bored of a week of that he likes Activities#me this morning getting insecure and weird: what are your thoughts... on cicada voyage....#him after at first not even understanding the question: I'm SO excited for you?? you deserve to get to go absolutely feral???#I do.... ;n; 💕 why am I so scared to be a person.......#about me#cicada quest
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5 headcanons for an AU where All might deflates in front of the crowd after defeating the sludge villain?
OOOOOOH now that's fun
1- it's quiet, for a moment, as everyone stares and tries to process what they just saw. Izuku, who saw the truth already, still is stunned for a second. And then he realizes everyone else sees too, and his feet move before he can think more about it.
2- Izuku needs everyone to stop looking at All Might as the crowd begins to murmur, shaking itself. Izuku knows that Kacchan is very good at being loud and the center of attention. So, 2+2=4, he gives Bakugou a little push into a hero and a civilian and let's that work out.
3- As the explosion begins, Izuku grabs All Might's hand and runs, down between two buildings that still smell like smoke and sewage. Mt Lady grows for crowd control, and sees where they go- but the look in their eyes makes her turn back to the crowd and block a few civilians from following. She pretends everything is normal, and she's an actress. If that really was All Might- and it had to be, she felt that power- he'll be grateful when she contacts his agency later to demand what happened. If it isn't, then she can point out that letting non-heroes follow a villainous impersonator of that power level would have been disastrous.
4- they go a few buildings further when All Might's feet drag and Izuku's burst of motion slows. He pants, and stops at the street. "Go one way, All Might, sir, I'll tell them you went the other way." He can still hear Kacchan shouting above the other voices, and Mt Lady arguing back, but they don't have a lot of time. "Yeah, no." Toshinori says, and drags Izuku instead into a store, heading for the clearance section and hats.
5- the good news is, most people had put their phones down at this point and weren't filming. The TV cameras had turned away to show the people cheering and the blond victim fine. The bad news is that some people still were filming, and the TV crew went back, catching sight of All Might's skinny back fleeing the scene as the crowd erupted. As Toshinori pays for a change of clothes for both him and Izuku, his phone starts to ring. He mutes it as they change and put on the hats. Izuku asks where they are running too, but Toshinori just goes two buildings down to a ramen shop and sits at a table. He points out that no is going to look for All Might at a restaurant a block from the crime scene, much less expect him to be casually eating there in an Endeavor hoodie and a ball cap. He thinks the bright orange FG jacket izuku is now wearing to hide his school uniform clashes horribly with the lilac beanie, but it works to make the few curls escaping to look less green. As they eat, Toshinori tells Izuku about OfA, and makes his offer. Izuku bursts into tears because he just ruined All Might's secret, revealed it to everyone, he doesn't deserve his quirk, and now that it's in the open All Might can pick someone else, the best choice. Toshinori disagrees, because all Izuku did was inspire him to save that other boy, which was more important. Izuku agrees to be his successor, numbers are exchanged, and after eating Toshinori walks him home just in case- but it seems Izuku wasn't identified, probably because Bakugou could only scream "Deku" when shoved, so Izuku gets a quiet night of pure stress to himself while Toshinori heads to ask Tsukauchi for a ride to Might Tower for a very loud and very long night of pure stress and demanding answers.
#that said. bakugou IS going to be Right Outside when Izuku leaves the next morning to demand answers.#and Izuku will apologize and say he just panicked because All Might needed help and then left when there wasn't a crowd to mob him#but like. bakugou knows Izuku isn't telling the truth. and Izuku knows he can't say ANYTHING or he'll end up saying EVERYTHING and all#anyone can talk about as school is All Might (at least they don't remember Bakugou dying in slime ten seconds prior ig)#and Bakugou can't corner Izuku for answers in school in public and suspects he can't force them out with explosions but maybe threats will#work. so izuku skips at the very end of the day so he can't be cornered twenty minutes later and so he can get a head start running to meet#Toshinori who. you know. has maybe slept two hours at the most since they last met#well. good luck to everyone there!#pocket talks to people#anon#ask game#great ask keep them coming
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barbentyler
#twenty one pilots#scaled and icy#clancy#had this idea at 3 in the morning 💀#tyler joseph#clique art#fanart#not a fan of the trend but the contrast between these two was kinda cool
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Cecio... hes such The Worst GuyTM in my head for wotr i forget how tragic he really is, especially his childhood. he was torn away from his family at his mothers death and taken to a whole new country where they said they were fair but everyone hated his mums home and he lived so much in his memories, replaying them again and again till they lost the truth and he couldnt tell what was his sister or his mother... he tried to be nice and likable and then got sent to the worldwound because he was to good at that... HES AT BEST 22 IN WOTR!!! HE SHOULD BE IN THE CLUB!!!!! HE IS A CHILD WHO NEVER GOT TO GROW UP!! HE WAS NOT EVEN A TEENAGER WHEN HE WAS TAKEN AWAY FROM EVERYTHING HE KNEW!!!!
#cecio#sorry was talking in dms w Lau and CECIOOO😭😭😭#there is actually a really good reason for why he is how he is and fuck he makes me sad#i will make a longer post in the morning#cecio......😭😭#HES AT BEST 22!!!!! TWENTY FUCKING TWO!!!#i planned him as younger
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man i know chronic fatigue doesn't make sense in general but one of the things that makes me the most frustrated is that simply sitting up uses so much energy. reclining on a couch tires me out. why am i getting tired from just just sitting !!!
#i try to be a good sport about this but man. im 22 years old and sitting on a couch is tiring. it simply is not fair#i am just glad i got through highschool without this amount of fatigue (still had fatigue but it was mostly tolerable back then)#i miss being able to clean a room for an entire day! i would start in the morning and have it all deep cleaned and reorganized by evening#and now i can maybe do ten to twenty mins of dishes in a day before i have to rest for an entire hour or two#oh well i suppose fdjkl this is the hand i am dealt. however i do get so frustrated and discouraged sometimes dsgjkl#pippen needs 2nd breakfast
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worst thing about being disabled is that now I am fully and completely aware of exactly how much I am worth to everyone I know. And it is not a lot!!
#like. it gets to me. A lot of the time it’s ohhh your life is priceless and. Well. Okay I did just see you put a price on it though.#like. It’s not always blatant but the laziness comments get to me. The stupid comments get to me. The money comments also get to me.#Either all life is precious or I am a drain on society. you cannot have both.#Why is my life worth less than twenty dollars. Better yet why are YOU gambling with MY life. wear your FUCKING masks.#like I’m usually fine bc I simply do not have the capacity for any more shit. I am existing in less dimensions than most ppl and Not Aware#And then when I am better I experience two entire years of Concentrated Cosmic Horror before I fold back down into being two dimensional#Cosmic horror? Eldritch horror? I DONT ACTUALLY KNOW. what I do know is that I straight up Do Not believe in the soul anymore bc of this!#like I’m horrified!! It is literally horrifying. If I still had all of me I could write some deeply fucked up metaphor but rn what I’ve got#Is like. okay so I’m supposed to be like. A galaxy on the inside folded into a person shape. Right#there’s stuff happening in there. three to five trains of thought at once etc. etc. and that is not what I have anymore. what I have now is#like. One planet and a white dwarf. not even a neutron star. And everything else went out so gradually that I didn’t really notice but#I woke up one morning and it’s not there and then I got into the habit of not looking up bc that’s a lot of work and I have to keep paintin#galaxies on the ash of this stupid little planet. And then I experience random bandaid treatment and Have The Knowledge again and.#I get to experience Plato’s allegory of the cave in REAL TIME and involuntarily!!#It really does suck that the only time I am able to comprehend the magnitude of my loss is when I’m not experiencing it!! bad times!!#I’m tired of being agreeable. Wear masks. Petition for air purifiers in public spaces. Or I start biting for real#if you notice I’m dealing with long covid a. BADLY. you’re right!! Gold fucking star! I challenge ANYONE to deal with The Bullshit actually#I’m not going to let myself be martyred for the fucking. Economy. Bull FUCKING shit.
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Despite her attempts to collect herself, it took Aria a long time of letting tears fall and letting herself purr before she could finally speak again. When she did so, her voice sounded somewhat hoarse, but it was still unmistakeable as hers.
"You.. would really love something like me.." she was mumbling.
"Of *course* I would! And do..!" Clio said back, keeping her own voice light in return. "I'm always gonna be here for you, Ari. And I'm just.. so so glad that you're okay.."
She trailed off and started crying again, this time fully with joy and relief.
(Anyone is welcome to comment on and/or reblog my work if they want to, as long as my DNI is respected)
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Thank you kindly to anyone who has taken the time to look at this ^-^
#heart of the void#creations from the void#OC selfshipping#selfshipping#love: crown of clovers (clio)#selfship: of flowers unchained (clio/aria)#self‑insert: darkness' champion (aria)#of lux and daybreak (union x)#..sort of. it's fatebreakers. which is various pieces of literally everything.#this post is okay to reblog as long as my DNI is respected#okay now I can go to bed#where did twenty past two come from#I feel like this could go in the Darkling AU tag but at the same time it. isn’t that.#fatebreakers arilio#you know what that’ll do#please let me know if this should be tagged with anything#I can explain the full context in the morning but in short it was very much a sort of#“monster finally showing how inhuman she is and yet she is still loved even still’’
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kinda drives me up a wall when people go "hey i think x action in a war/combat scenario is inhumane and cruel and shitty" and someone responds with "oh but within the laws of war it's allowed or there's procedure for it etc etc". it doesn't have to be a war crime to be unforgivable man it's a shitty rulebook anyway
#like whether or not something's bad isn't determined by whether or not it adheres to arbitrary rules people made up and never obey#i thought we all knew that already. c'mon man. get a grip#obviously war crimes are bad but that's not where the badness potential ends y'know#this post is due to my dad talking about smth i sent him mentioning US troops firing on a bunch of guys in smth on deserters and he was lik#well they're not like citizens or refugees or deserters they're retreating enemy combattants. so it's different.#it IS different but isn't it still like. overly brutal? idk.#like would you want them to pursue Your ppl regardless? are they not allowed mercy just because you proved stronger? your positions could#be swapped easily and you'd think that as fellow combattants you would feel that deeply. idk maybe i'm just too soft or whatever but like.#seems stupid to me. war generally seems stupid to me but this specifically right now seems stupid to me#yes i know there are practical concerns and sacrifices in combat that make sense when you're actually there and me saying there should be n#wars and we should make it a fucking priority to not have wars doesn't mean ppl already in a decision-making role in the field should do#what i (an idealist) would do. they're responsible for minimizing loss and shit. whatever. doesn't mean it's not fucked up anyway.#and that's assuming the best case scenario for a leader in such a position. usually they just want to minimize Their side's losses. usually#by maximizing the other side's. or they just want to win and will sacrifice anyone for it if it's practical#which happens a Lot. usually it's a mix of the latter two to my understanding#as if americans' lives matter more than anyone else's and the other side doesn't have a right to mourn bc they offended us somehow#ugh that shit irks me so bad dude. there'll be like a terrorist attack in europe or smth and the news'll be like#ONE AMERICAN WAS KILLED. and twenty swiss. THE AMERICAN WAS VISITING FAMILY THERE ON SUNDAY MORNING WHEN TRAGEDY STRUCK etc etc#fucking hate that. i don't care if they're on 'my team' or whatever they're all equally human and equally dead#why the hell should i care if one of them was an american. just say 21 people died. like i get reporting on it briefly ig to like notify#ppl At Best but like. it's so grating. why can't you be normal about other people fucking goddamn you#why is this a controversial statement. why is giving a shit about people killing each other (often for like 10 ppl's financial gain) wrong#like. come on. i don't care if they 'deserve it' or whatever because i don't think they do. and even if they Did i don't think it's#America's Time To Step Up!!! every time smth like this happens (but only when it is financially beneficial to us to do so#such that we ignore atrocities all the fucking time bc it's inconvenient. we're not superheros. we're cops.)#not saying america shouldn't do anything bc like. idk. you screw everyone over to have all the power maybe you should use that influence fo#good. but my definition of 'good' is wayyyy way different from everybody who's ever held office here apparently so like. nuts to that#eugh. anyway im cutting myself off here rant over. for now
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once more thinking about The Morning Of New Years 2001 and its just now dawning on me that arakawa really chugged two bottles of booze and smoked A Fuck Bitch of ciggies Presumably before noon. like dire situation i know but god damn guy got a lot done in two hours
#snap chats#AND he's just chilling in the dark. ok not 'chilling' but yk what i mean#either he can really hold his liquor or bro picked up some .5% shit#now some might say 'snap it's two hours' and to that i say 'it's only been two hours' he just walkin off two bottles like theyre nothin#unless he is The Most Functional Drunk perceivable theeeeeen CHRIST#in all fairness he is only sitting so no fear of him tripping and banging his head into his desk but still#were you doin twenty-minute rule my dude... funny as hell consideration considering. The Fuck Bitch Of Ciggies#like i dont think health consciousness is on the table this morning..#what time is it. at that point. i keep telling myself i'd try to hunt down the time in-game but i doubt i'd find anything#arakawa office so fucked for not having a clock on the wall like girl id go mad not knowing what time it is#can i get a timeline of events for what happened. jo calls -> presumably they talk about a plan -> drink time#i doubt arakawa would be lying about the time sawashiro got in contact with him.... unless he did.... lol... anyway..#i just want a timeline of events like masato commits murder at midnight -> calls jo afterwards -> ???#did my guy sleep on it.. did he think of a plan all night...#ok bye i cant be sittin on this all night i have a comic im lining. which is why i made this post LMAO#I REMINDED MYSELF OF ARAKAWA'S DEPRESSION BREAKFAST ok bye
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Anyway I don't think Zack angels of death has sex
#random thoughts#angels of death#sorry x reader crowd#he gives off like. jacking off at four in the morning to take the edge off before you crash energy#also he has canonically eaten fruit loops in soda okay i don't think he's into degregation you are NOT his sex kitten#not only do i think he will not have sex i think he has never had sex before in his life because like. when the fuck would he have had sex#he got burnt crispy at like eight and subsequently orphaned. he's like twenty two. when did he have the time#also he has body image issues out the wazoo he is NOT letting anyone see him naked#also where the fuck is he getting all those bandaids from. is he banned from every cvs in a fifty mile radius of his current location#if asked if he's had sex he would scoff and say yes (he is lying)#if asked how many times he would squint into the middle distance and say ' . . . a bunch of times.'#but it's more likely he'd get really pissy about it
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[pacing, tearing hair out, weeping] done badly is better than not done at all done badly is better than not done at all done badly is better than not done at all done badly is better than not done at all done badly is better than not done at all done badly is better than not done at all done badly is better than not done at all
#Have two papers due this morning that i hadnt started at all last night#got one in twenty mins ago (done badly)#about to start in on the other (badly)#mar posts#tag talk
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okay facing consequences of my actions
#I thought I’d gotten away with it this time#okay it’s 3am and I may have discovered something that completely ruins me#everyone is asleep so I can’t tell if this is me being sleep deprived or not!#so I need to sleep now but I haven’t cleaned my code up or written my answers#I do Not have time#if I don’t sleep now I’m gonna be having a bad time tomorrow morning and I am significantly less productive rn than I could be#with other people around I kinda need that y#so I should go to bed. but also. this code needs cleaning. but also. even if I fall asleep now I’m only getting like 5 hours MAX#I need a good few hours tomorrow morning to have a shot at doing this properly#so it would be more useful to sleep now and wake up as early as possible than keep going tonight bc I’m not going to finish tonight#okay. fuck. I hate this#if I could think straight I’d be able to fix this easy which is probably a good reason to sleep#it’s just an annoying logical problem that I gotta follow through bc currently I’m stuck between three possibilities and there might be more#I have these two rasters and I gotta calculate the area overlap#the first method counts the number of presence points in each (probably) and then counts the number in overlap raster w manually set values#the second counts total predicted points and points where they’re predicted to be alone and does a calculation with that for each species#that one with all points from both species + pseudoabsence. vs method 3 which does that with just individual species coordinates#method 1&2 are now homologous now I JUST caught the logical error but method 3 is what he gave us#but actually he might have fucked up in not including pseudoabsence#i don’t know if method 3 works for two different species either honestly#it gives me results I like much more (my overlap is 100% for one of the species and that shoooouldnt rlly happen even if it’s possible) but#I think it might actually just be wrong because it can’t account for#wait so the line is taking the prediction for all coordinates for each species for each species’ initial coordinates. and not pseudoabsence#and that set of predictions for each species coordinate set is then taken and yeah it’s no longer comparable you can’t count each alone#not with two different species bc you need an overlapping dataset to do that OKAY I have solved that logical problem my initial method works#which is annoying bc the result sucks but whatever I checked the rasters and it’s actually identical so#okay now I’ve figured that out. twenty minutes later. sleep I think it’ll help most#luke.txt
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