#it's that i wrote what i thought was a great transition scene but now i'm like 'eh' about it

[stabbyfoxandrew]

okay angel neil might be bumpy for a bit but i am tired of giving a fuck so you're getting a bumpy angel

[performativezippers]

fanfic writer habits i've had to unlearn when trying to traditionally publish original work

a list in no particular order in case you're curious

starting sentences with "And"

so. many. one sentence. paragraphs. like, yeah, this is fun for The Drama but also...not how books work

using italics for emphasis--gotta use your WORDS, zippy

head hopping. rereading old fanfics i wrote, i'm like, WHOSE POV IS THIS?? HOW WOULD JANE KNOW MAURA THINKS THIS?? jesus christ keep your pov tight, zipperoni. i had to really learn this when i was revising my first book and my agent pointed it out.

Oh. Oh. some of these are good but too many are oh [failure]

Using scene breaks to skip through transitions instead of actually transitioning. this one i'm working on right now and it's haaaaaaard.

scene choreography. if someone is holding something, do they ever put it down? are they STILL HOLDING IT NOW, FIVE YEARS LATER?

overwriting vs using a lighter touch. "that's normal. that's casual. that's fine." sometimes that's great for emphasis, but if it was always just "that's casual. that's fine." the point comes across the same way, and doesn't hit you over the head with it as much.

introducing new characters and making them memorable, vivid, and not sucking up too much space when the reader doesn't recognize them (it's lena! i love her!)

pacing! things have to happen at specific times, the book needs to end at a specific time, the conflict needs to be sown here and explode there. making that all feel organic and honest for the characters while also conforming to the genre expectations that have very little flexibility (especially for a new author trying to convince publishers I know how to write books)

ending things at the right time. at first i wrote too far beyond the climax (classic fanfic problem) and then now i seem to have swung too far in the other direction and am ending too soon after it. but the good news is that my editor asked for an epilogue. you know what that means?? A WHOLE SHORT CHAPTER OF FLUFF Y'ALL!!!

Does this need to be a curse word or can it be a different word? i mean often it fucking needs to but not always!

Just cut out the word just almost all of the time even if it feels like it's just the right word; it will hurt just a little but you should just do it.

use as much sex as the plot needs. incorporate it into the plot. don't change the tone of the piece. make it stay in character and also be hot and also serve the narrative.

got questions? want examples? have thoughts? what other things have you caught yourself doing, or notice when you read through your old stuff?

[batsplat]

speaking of smallville now that was certainly a show. how many seasons did you manage and when is it best to stop? I am currently at s2 and already I would kill every other character for lex, wyd it’s only gonna get worse 😭

lmaooo okay so I got to. six. which actually kinda kills me because I swear I poured my heart and my soul into that stupid show, it drove me insane it left me a lesser person and I BARELY GOT HALFWAY

my basic analysis of the default journey with that show that I'm going to pretend is universal is like. it hooks you with something compelling in s1 and you still have enough naive faith to give it benefit of doubt that the writers actually know what they're doing, because you just wanted to have a bit of fun but, hey, these characters are actually more interesting than you expected!! then in s2 you're starting to get doubts but you're already kinda too deep. then s3 breaks your sanity and makes you scream and at this point you just see how far this shit goes. then s4 is.... mid..... but is also in a way the last remotely palpable season? and then at some point in s5 you're just like. wow I don't even enjoy the hate watching any more. and s6 is. yeah. eventually there was one storyline that is so insanely uncomfortable that it's just. enough. enough!

[mild spoilers to follow]

if s2 drives you insane on lex grounds then!! boy!! s3!! the thing about s3 from lex's pov is that. okay it's extremely angsty and does increasingly radicalise you... I have to say I started this show in a very innocent jokey 'oh ho ho I heard they have some good superman/lex luthor queerbait in that noughties show!!' and was ready to be a lex fan like. as a bit. and y'know my readiness to adopt morally dubious characters is pretty high anyway. but the first few seasons made me go?? okay but he genuinely isn't even the villain?? like I'm not even saying this for the bit, he LITERALLY is not the bad guy in this story?? guys??? and then by the end of season 3 I had been completely radicalised to the 'Actually Lex Luthor Should Turn Evil And Kill All Of You People And I Will Cheer Him On' stance. but what really, really, really kills me is that after all that, they still manage to bungle his transition to evil. like, they ignore all the very obvious reasons for why lex would turn evil after all that, and just come up with completely new ones? that have fuck all to do with this character you've been writing up to that point?

and the worst bit. the WORST bit. is that after all that, he literally does not even have fun being evil. like, you know that season one episode where he's being mind controlled and does his gay little swagger. this scene, yeah:

first of all, again, they ended up erasing lex's canonical motivation for turning evil, which is being so queer-coded he might as well be wearing a sign with slurs around his neck while he's stuck in a small town in fucking kansas. like "you think I don't see the way your parents look at me? the way half the town looks at me?" okay, great, love how this entire arc is eventually concluded by having the show say the entire town including clark's small-minded parents were 100% right to be suspicious of him, that there was something fundamentally defect with him basically from birth and he was always going to turn out to be evil. I feel like you definitely thought through the implications of what you wrote here!

but never mind all that, my actual point is that lex is having fun here!! this is one of several episodes where they're 'foreshadowing' lex turning evil by 'having a paranormal reason to make lex evil for a few minutes' (some subtle writing, this), and he's generally having a lot of fun with it!! he's leaning into the camp of it all!! he's freed from all his nasty and completely unnecessary inhibitions like 'not killing everyone in smallville' which. good. and he's just having a great time. and then he becomes a villain and he's literally just miserable all the time!! it sucks!! like omg if you're going to butcher his writing and ruin the character then at LEAST let him have some fucking fun?? at least let him experience joy at his own depravity or whatever? like he doesn't even get to do any fun villain monologues at clark, he's literally just sad clark isn't his friend any more while clark is giving him the homophobic dog slur. and then also about twice a season something paranormal happens to clark and he physically assaults lex to the point where he like, almost kills him, and then after that everyone pretends it didn't happen and clark never apologises and continues to burst into his room demanding answers. like omg?? lex, they hate you anyway, can you please just attempt to shoot clark?? also, obviously the turn to villainy should have been in large part motivated by lex finding out clark's secret and going?? the fuck is wrong with you for not just SAYING this?? (plus finding out everything clark did to lex in season three to keep his secret like it's genuinely so fucked up #lmao) but. I hate to break bad news to you about where we're at with the whole 'does lex know clark's secret yet' situation at the point where I gave up. genuinely what is the point of all this building and perfectly interesting character work if you're NEVER gonna deliver

but quite possibly an even worse sin of the later seasons that genuinely broke my brain was the treatment of lex's father. like, not to give the game away too much here, but the show's philosophical stance on rotten apples ends up being.... well. it's interesting which characters this show feels is worthy of redemption!! also interesting when they retcon several seasons of writing for the show that already very much set up why a character would actually perfectly legitimately go insane and instead settle for 'well his father sure did know there was always something wrong with him'!! watching some season 3 and season 5 episodes back to back would leave your face scarred from the amount of whiplash in the writing. the whole thing's kinda incompetent and dumb but is also like?? actively a little bit evil when you really think about the implications of what they're writing here

anyway. it's a brave stance on superman to go 'okay but what is being a superhero really about if not a whole whole lot of gaslighting'. and I do love the clark stalking room!! but the problem is, they could've played the clark/lex dynamic in a kinda tragic 'wow clark really has been so blinded by his parents that he's gonna end up destroying his relationship to lex because he just can't be honest with him and lex really needed one person in his corner who actually trusted him but clark wasn't the right person to provide that' way. they could've played it in a sort of fun 'yeah this is kinda fucked up and weird and toxic how they simply cannot stop doing dubious shit to each other' way where you just kinda roll with how terrible the whole thing is. but they don't go for either of those!! they're so stuck with treating clark's parents as the moral centre of the universe, with their "marriage is SACRED, clark" schtick and all that (yeah, there's an episode where clark gets lectured about the importance of the bond of marriage, this is a thing that happens) that they're blatantly unaware of what story they're telling but ALSO just refuse to lean into the batshit insane elements and just have!! fun!! and it's one of those things where you really do feel like an idiot for even thinking about this stupid fucking show so!! much!! but I swear, I swear they had a dynamic that hit like crazy in season one... also some of the fic out there for them is CRAZY like it kinda does make it all worth it but still!! still!! this shit infuriates me!!

anyway, here are some bonkers plot bits I remember happening in this show for you to enjoy if you continue in this endeavour:

the lex luthor slut shaming episode

clark kent slut shaming lex luthor, which is conceptually funny anyway but becomes funnier if you just read it as clark being unable to figure out he is actually just subliminally attracted to his friend. like, okay, clark being disappointed at lex for sleeping with thirteen different women, I see you

like. multiple lesbian lana moments. she's constantly getting herself in lesbian situations. and I get this is some kinda weird fanservice-y shit from the showrunners but, sue me, I thought lesbian vampire lana was cute

which is a thing that happens

they get spike from btvs to tell clark vampires aren't real, which is the one funny thing they wrote in about a season

the native american stuff is always deeply uncomfortable but it becomes even weirder when they invent some native american prophecy *deep sigh* to explain how lex was always evil

clark steals a car from lex several episodes after committing like, one of the most obscene acts of betrayal it is possible to commit against a friend (lex is unaware of this and possibly never finds out? I think the writers maybe forgot about this.) and lex is just like. it's fine <3 I know friends sometimes have to do crazy shit for other friends!! you're my friend, right?? and clark goes... yeah. sure

I vaguely remember lex buying stuff the american football high school team at some point and showing up to the lockers to give a speech and it's just?? this is right after the friendship break up and it's basically lex talking right at clark and he's talking about the importance of fresh starts and it is so fucking funny

the one episode where lana is in paris. they had built up to this for ages as like a whole thing where lana finally frees herself from that miserable town and all the people in it (don't ask how the 'lana knowing clark's secret' situation develops. it doesn't) and then she's there for. one episode

martha kent tells clark how they can't harbour illegal immigrants at one stage?? she eventually changes her mind I think but what even was that all about

the papa kent goes into politics arc. shoot me

lex becomes like. possessed by zod. which somehow manages to make everyone involved more dull

silver kryptonite makes clark paranoid, which ends up being pretty funny because he genuinely talks the exact same way

lex thinks clark can throw him across the room because he's been hypnotised

lex starts capturing various clark super powered friends and delivers these gay villain monologues to them (like genuinely, in one of them he's got shirtless aquaman strapped to a gurney and he's like, leaning over him, teasing him with a glass of water) and they're some of the best bits of the show

clark discovers the clark stalking room, which I will say was very funny

chloe basically saying lex always sends clark these massive gifts as a way of keeping his affections which?? clearly true but I thought we were keeping that the subtext

clark gatecrashes lex's wedding high on red kryptonite

one of lex's old bullies gets killed by like, a statue falling from the top of the building they're standing next to and stabbing the guy and then some of the blood splashes on lex and he's just like ?? bleh. fantastic scene

and THEN there's several scenes with his father where lex is like 'well that sure was a nice shirt :(' and lex's father is berating him for his lack of humanity. or something

there's an episode where lex is split into good lex and evil lex and it's genuinely the only worthwhile thing the show did that season. like the writing is still kinda incoherent but, crucially. it sure is fun

the spirit of lex's mum tells him she thinks he sucks

worst show in existence. I'll never forget it

[thursdayinspace]

20 questions for 20 writers

tagged by @thatfragilecapricorn30 @randomfoggytiger and @baronessblixen thank you!! <3

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 21

2. What’s your total AO3 word count? 70.063 -- this is my new AO3, so that's why it's still so low, haha.

3. What fandoms do you write for? Only X-Files now.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? spectacular (glasses sex!), it's the day the world didn't end, from this morning forward (that makes me so happy), got you covered, wild side

5. Do you respond to comments? yes. if I ever don't, I'm sorry, it's not because i didn't love your comment, but i just don't get around to it right away sometimes. but i try to reply to every single one because i love them all.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? ohhh. i don't write super angsty endings . . . I guess mend into pieces bc it's season 2 and they know they're making a mistake, but we all know they'll figure it out eventually, so.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? they pretty much all end happily. i'm going to more or less randomly pick five ways to say i love you. because i loved writing that ending.

8. Do you get hate on fics? so, okay. there are two stories here i want to tell from an old fandom. one is funny. one is kind of great, really?

the funny one: i got a looooong comment on a fic, like several paragraphs long, going into great detail about why the fic sucked and why i sucked and why i had personally offended them by writing fic at all. they obvs meant to comment anonymously but forgot to log out. by the time i got to my computer, they had deleted their entire account. of course i had their name in the ao3 email. i laughed so hard at that.

the kind of amazing one: i got a very rude anon on tumblr, and i responded by saying i'd be happy to discuss their criticism, but i wasn't going to have a conversation with a hockey puck with sunglasses, and asked them to come off anon so we could talk. and they did! they showed up in my dms a short while later. we solved nothing and did not part as friends, but i actually have mad respect for that. wherever they are today, i hope they have taken some anger management classes and are doing well!

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? yeah, i certainly do. idk what kind? the porny kind? lol no i mean it's kind of lame but fun.

10. Do you write crossovers? i wrote a stargate atlantis/firefly crossover centuries ago but that was it. or maybe start trek with sth else, i don't remember.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? not to my knowledge.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? i don't think so, no.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? yes! it's so much fun and i would do it again.

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship? mulder and scully!

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? i plan to finish all of them.

16. What are your writing strengths? it used to be dialogue but i don't think it is anymore. idk? i think i can create an atmosphere?

17. What are your writing weaknesses? i tend to repeat myself a lot and then skip over other things completely. i'm not good with transitions between scenes.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? i haven't done it, but if it would make sense for a fic, i might do it.

19. First fandom you wrote for? stargate atlantis. i was very late to the fanfic party.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written? it's called 'ellipsis' and is still with the beta. but of the ones i've already posted, either from this morning forward or yesterday's future.

Randomfoggytiger added additional questions:

1. Is writing a hobby or way of life? i mean it's a hobby but it's definitely also a way of life. there isn't ever a time when i don't think about writing and everything all the time connects in some way to a thing i'm writing and i can't imagine what i'd do without writing.

2. A journal full of writing notes or a clean, completed manuscript? completed manuscript! or notes? uhh . . . both?

3. Who (or what) is your writing inspiration? everything. random things. i can't think of one specific thing, it can be literally anything.

4.Which is worse: someone you "idolize" reading your first draft or listening to you sing? both thoughts are equally awful lol

5. Has writing from someone else's POV ever changed your own perspective? yeah, i think so. not in any big way, but about smaller stuff, just the way i look at certain things? yes.

6. Tumblr, AO3, LiveJournal, or FFN? ao3!!! my tinkerbell brain loves the comment section, haha. also it's just so much nicer to read on ao3 and there's the download option, so also as a reader, def ao3.

7. AO3 wordcount, and are you satisfied with it? 70.063 - no, i'm not satisfied with it. i used to write multi-chapters with more words. but it's a new account so yeah starting small again.

8. What movie/book/fic gripped you irrevocably? jasper fforde's 'thursday next' series. it's where i stole my name from. literary detectives? oh man. it's the kind of story where you wish you'd had the idea first. go read it!!!!!

9. What's the highest compliment you could ever be given, and have you been given it? i am really really lucky to have been given so many amazing compliments and i appreciate every single one. i couldn't say what means the most to me . . . probably when it's personal to the commenter? when someone tells me sth i've written touched them in some way. bc that's what i want to achieve.

10. What defines your writing style? lol idek man pretentious purple prose? i think i live somewhere between overuse of metaphors and focus on the rhythm of a text. i love writing in english bc it flows so nicely. idk is trying to make it sound nice a style bc then that's at least what i'm going for.

who hasn't been tagged? no pressure tags for @backintimeforstuff @nachosncheezies @actual-changeling and everybody else who wants to!

[bengiyo]

La Pluie Ep 8 Stray Thoughts

Last week, we wrote so many good posts about this show, especially the importance of Tai's pleasure from giving pleasure to Patts. Lomfon proved mostly ineffectual, but Tien has placed himself firmly between Lomfon and Tai. Nara turned up at the camp, and Tai witnessed her kissing Patts. It's time for the drama.

I don't mind starting a few minutes back to reset the timeline and pacing of this so we can see how Nara approached Patts.

Oh, Patts is not feeling this at all.

I really appreciate that Patts feels bad about this situation between him and Nara. I don't think I'd like him for Tai if he didn't care about Nara.

The backing track for this Nara scene is incredible. This show has really solid sound mixing.

I feel for Nara, because her greatest fear was Patts leaving her for his soulmate, and now he's found him. She's gotta be feeling upset, embarrassed, and a little foolish at this point. I really appreciate that the show has shown her great respect.

Once again, I love how engaged Patts is with everything going on. He saw a dropped bento and immediately worried that Tai saw Nara and misunderstood.

Bow and Kung are holding hands. I know we're worried about Tai, but I NEED TO KNOW.

Man, I love how quickly everyone pieced together what happened and focused on the immediate problem: locating Saengtai.

Lomfon's insistence that Saengtien not endanger himself too is quite reasonable.

Oh, Tien. He's such a little brother. I love him.

Great transition. I'd recognize Tai by his rings and sweaters anywhere.

I must say the music for this episode has been so well-selected.

NOO! MY SWEET BOY!!!

Interesting. Lomfon has hearing loss, too.

Patts is so strong. Carrying our beautiful boy all the way down a mountain.

I knew Tai was running up that goddamn hill because he doubted the truth of the soulmate connection and was confused by Nara and Patts being compatible!

That was beautiful. I love Patts so much. He's not mad at Tai and just listens quietly to Tai finally opening up about his Soulmate fears. They can finally arrive at the conclusion the show has been arguing for literally two months: It doesn't matter if they're ordained by the universe or not; what matters is they love each other.

Patts just put his whole heart on the line when he asked Saengtai to be his boyfriend. I love this man. I will be tolerating no more slander on him.

I really like how specific each of these have felt each time.

I WILL NEVER GET OVER BOY SOMPOB SINGING OVER BIG MOMENTS IN BL. NINE YEARS AND COUNTING.

Bow and I are the same. I also cried over my boy.

I absolutely adore the relationship between Tai and Tien.

OH. MY. GOD. LOMFON HEARD BOTH TAI AND PATTS!!!!! The implications of this are huge.

We get to meet Saengnuea next week!

I am absolutely in love with this show. This is my favorite show from this year that's not Moonlight Chicken. I love how much grace is given to every character. I like how seriously it takes itself, its ideas, and its audience. I love how much this feels like a classic romance novel I might have read when I got into this 15 years ago. I love the choreography of all of the kisses. I'm haven't cried this much of a BL in a long time.

Shoutouts to @lurkingshan @kyr-kun-chan @wen-kexing-apologist @liyazaki and @ginnymoonbeam for sending me updates while I was busy this afternoon.

[thebreakfastgenie]

thoughts on Inga?

I wrote all this from my memory of the episode, but it's kind of bugging me that I don't have time to rewatch it right now. So when I get a chance I'm going to rewatch it and update this with any new thoughts!

I think Inga is a good episode! I like it! I think it's slightly OOC at times, because it goes in on Hawkeye being sexist and downplays the sexism of other characters to emphasize it. BJ and Potter are sexist too, we see it all the time in other episodes, and it's what you'd expect for men from that era. Hawkeye is also sexist in specific ways that aren't totally consistent with his character. I can rationalize "when you go dancing, who leads?" in a million ways, but it's never going to really make sense for a character who has openly asked Margaret to step on him to react that way to a woman taking the lead in bed. And Hawkeye has never been traditional when it comes to sex, he's always been in favor of women taking an active role. And I know Alan Alda knew that because he's the one who was playing him that way for seven years.

Other things about Hawkeye's behavior in Inga feel exactly right to me. Hawkeye loves that she's smart, but freaks out that she's smarter than him. That feels consistent with who he is and also very realistic to how men often behave. The scene where Margaret takes him down is great and a great use of Margaret.

That being said, I think Inga is the way it is for a reason. Alan Alda was making a very important point about sexism, misogyny, and the way women are treated, and I think he prioritized that point over characterization. And honestly I'm okay with that. He was using the show and the characters to say something important, which is kind of what MASH is for. Hawkeye is Hawkeye, but he's also representing men as a class. I also really admire him for making Hawkeye, the beloved protagonist, his character, the cad who learns a lesson about respecting women. That takes a certain level of humility and commitment. The audience may not want to see an episode about how much their womanizing hero sucks, but they need to. It's important, though, that womanizing isn't Hawkeye's crime here. The exact nature of Hawkeye and Inga's dynamic is great and I think a lot of shows wouldn't have done it.

Hawkeye is excited at the prospect of hooking up with Inga, and when she arrives, she's totally into it! Inga likes sex! She wants to have sex with the hot male doctor! Showing a woman who's confident and successful and enthusiastic about a hookup was pretty significant for the time. Inga is totally into Hawkeye until he blows it by acting obnoxious. And she forgives him once he learns and grows and apologizes, but they run out of time and miss their chance to hook up. And that is so important. It would have completely undercut the message of the episode if Hawkeye had actually gotten to sleep with Inga.

I love them though and I do like to imagine maybe they run into each other again someday. Also Inga is gorgeous.

There's one specific thing not related to the main plot that always fascinates me about this episode, and it's Inga mistaking Klinger for a trans woman. Klinger is not especially pro-trans in that scene, though it's easy to read it kindly as Klinger just being freaked out because that's not what he wants and because people who are unfamiliar with it are often kinda weird about bottom surgery in general, even if they're not especially anti-trans, because people are just very protective of their genitals. If I'm being completely honest it can also be easily read as a joke that Klinger, for all his dress wearing, is still not onboard with the idea of a "sex change." But what interests me in that scene is Inga. Inga makes the reasonable assumption that Klinger is pursuing a medical transition and offers to help, and the comedy comes from Klinger freaking out and running away. Inga never approaches the topic as any other way than a doctor offering assistance. And that means something to me because this entire episode is about proving Inga right and showing her as "more advanced" than Hawkeye. Inga is vindicated by the narrative, so medical/surgical transition is vindicated by the narrative. Just not for Klinger. There's also a bit of behind-the-scenes trivia that provides some context for this, in my opinion. Dr. Walter Dishell, the medical advisor for MASH, was a medical advisor on several shows as well as a practicing facial plastic surgeon. His practice treated trans women and he mentioned being inspired by them to pitch episodes featuring trans patients to some of the medical shows he worked on. The way he speaks about trans people is very "cishet man in the 70s" but it's positive. I always wonder if this influenced Inga's line.

I think it's kind of funny that Inga is the one Alan Alda won the Best Writing Emmy for, because I think he wrote other episodes that showcase his writing talent better, but I'm glad the "respect women!!" episode won.

[thehoneybeet]

It might be cheating to use an opening passage, but I adore the way you started plant me in your garden (and watch me grow). It gives such great insight into both Harry and Draco from the get go with so few words, and I’d love to know more about what you were thinking when you wrote it!

[Malfoy falls asleep in herbology. A bowtruckle is making a nest in his hair.

It’s long and gleaming, falling like water down his back, except for the tendrils gently woven together at the top, making a tiny little cup. The bowtruckle is dipping the ends of it in the corner of Malfoy’s parted mouth, wetting the strands slightly before threading them together. Harry thinks Malfoy might have a conniption when he wakes.

He doesn’t. Instead, he smiles, a secret thing, and gently cuts the hair attached to the nest, slowly floating it to the table, the bowtruckle along for the ride. Tiny tufts of blond stick up in the middle of his head now, an odd kind of mullet.

Harry can’t bring himself to look away. No one else seems to notice. He looks down. His bowtruckle is nowhere to be seen.]

I literally think about this opening all the time, and I’m not exaggerating. You’re brilliant! 💜

Hi mj! Not cheating at all! I'm so touched that plant me in your garden is the fic you chose; it's special to me because it's my first fic and it was written during a time when I was thinking a lot about what it means to be genderfluid and nonbinary. I transplanted a lot of those feelings into my characterisation of Draco, who is probably the closest character I've written to myself, my interests, my view of life (that said, he's definitely not me for a myriad of reasons). Commentary below the cut:

This draco is so different from any other draco I've written. They are very soft and reserved in large part because of the introspection it took to discover their gender identity, and their desire to get through the year unnoticed. Except Harry does notice Draco, even when Draco tries to be invisible.

With this scene, I wanted to establish a few things: Draco's tired during the day because he stays up all night. Draco has long hair, but he doesn't have a stick up his arse. He has a private relationship with his surroundings and the natural world that Harry is privy to but feels very much outside of. And Harry notices these things, sees how different Draco is from before, and starts to admire those qualities.

I started the fic using 'he' pronouns for Draco to make a gentle transition from canon Draco to the Draco we meet in this story. I really wanted Draco's gender fluidity and shifting pronouns to be not a big deal, an integral part of the emotional undercurrent of the story without making it a story about being genderqueer. This is also why the story is from Harry's point of view, so we get glimpses of Draco's interior life but not the full story. At the time I'm not sure if I felt qualified to write that interiority, as I was only beginning to think in depth about that experience.

More than just being about what Harry calls in the fic 'the gender thing', plant me is about being understood. Being seen. And that comes out several ways: Draco being seen by harry for who she is, Harry's needs being noticed and attended to by Draco even when he is trying to repress them. Feeling safe to be yourself, even when you think you are a danger or wrong somehow. And seeing that what you thought was dangerous or strange about yourself is actually beautiful. Maybe this is about being queer, actually. Hm.

The bowtruckles are here because I like them and how playful they are. They make nests in this fic because I wanted them to. I wanted both Draco and Harry to experience wonder. The world is wonderful. For most of Harry's life, magic is a constant source of violence, but it's also a source of wonder for him early on. I wanted his awe of magic to emerge now that he's no longer in mortal danger, and for Draco to give him a little more of that magic that he didn't grow up with.

The funny thing is I hardly even remember physically writing this passage since it's been two years, so I have little idea of what I was thinking at the exact time I wrote it. I definitely didn't know how the story was going to end. Sometimes I wish I could get back to how I used to write (like this) which was much less self-conscious, and more indulgent, exploratory, I think. Gentler. I don't know. Everyone has their seasons, and I guess I just have to trust that I can still grow as a writer, even though this is still one of my favorites. Thank you so much for this lovely ask 💜💜💜

send me a snip from a fic of mine and I'll do a dvd-style commentary on it

[whumptimebaby]

Happy One Year to Turning Red!

I can't believe it's been a whole year since Turning Red released to the public, that is actually crazy. There are no words for what Turning Red has done for me as a person, but you sure as hell know I'm gonna try to explain 😎

I went into Turning Red as a new University student, at a huge transitional period in my life. I had a whole four friends, and more emotions than I knew how to deal with. I'll never forget the feeling of sitting next to two of my IRL's in my Pixar class, and scream singing Nobody Like U as the credits rolled. It felt like middle school again. It felt great to be Canadian, and neurodivergent, and queer, and it felt especially great to be in fandom.

I knew from the moment I walked out of that room that I was going to write fic for 4*Town. I'm a sucker for a boy band, it was bound to happen, but God, I didn't know what was going to become of it. I thought I'd write one or two fics and move on to the next fandom, you know?

I wrote You Know What's Up (It's Us), and about halfway through I had another idea for a fic. It was a commitment, a 15000 word monstrosity that took a month's worth of planning and writing, but finishing it meant the world. To this day, I've never been so nervous to publish a fic.

The plane crash fic changed everything for me, because now I had a universe to play with, not just an interpretation of some characters, so I sat down to work out how everything worked. I created a story spanning from 1995-2014, and chipped away at little moments from it. There was the beach music video, that time Aaron T got kidnapped, that time Jesse got in a car accident, all little snapshots and character studies that were part of something bigger.

I've been wanting to tell the whole story for a while now. There are so many aspects of it that I've been so excited to share, but for a while I just... didn't know how.

I know I haven't been posting fics like I used to, but I promise it was for a reason. I've mentioned a super secret project a couple of times now, and I think today is as good as any to reveal what that is. I've been working on it since July for fuck's sake 😭 It's been killing me not talking about it.

But first! I want to say that the thing I'm most grateful for from this whole thing is meeting @5town and @wondero28. I love both of you so much, and you've really made this community a home for me. Thank you for putting up with my bullshit 🫶🫶

Now without further ado, have a teaser, a sneak peek, a tiny glimpse at 4*Town: The World's Most Tragic Boy Band

A documentary on 4*Town's career spanning from 1995-2004, and taking place 10 years after they officially disband. The boys talk about the things they've gone through year by year, with behind the scenes footage from their tours, music videos, and rehearsals.

The current plan is to finish the damn thing (💀) and then release each year one at a time with releases twice a week, Wednesdays and Saturdays, which means the whole thing will be out over the course of five weeks. The format is... to be determined. I have a feeling formatting this for AO3 is going to be hell, but I'll figure it out!

So yeah! That's the super secret project! I'm so excited to show you all the whole thing, because I'm really, really proud of it!

[boltlightning]

20 questions for fic writers

tagged by the wonderful @starsuncounted; thank you muchly <3

1. how many total works do you have on ao3? 54!

2. what’s your total ao3 word count? 362,814. oy vey

3. what fandoms do you write for? these days, potc and final fantasy and assassin's creed now and then, though i generally write for whatever grabs my attention. remember when i wrote a fallout fic? wild

4. what are your top 5 fics by kudos? oh dear. let’s see:

a house, a hearth, a (s)holmes — the great ace attorney, 6k. a collection of missing scenes about iris watson and her silly little family.

good company — fullmetal alchemist, 9k. pre-canon, roy mustang recruits people for his team. (i wrote this when i was 19 and there's still a lot i like about it, but boy is it humbling to reread.)

benchfellows — final fantasy vii remake, >1k. a drabble about cloud and aerith fighting in the wall market colosseum.

heart & home — fullmetal alchemist, 5k. roy and riza visits roy's home both pre-ishval and post-canon.

sun hits the water — potc, 8k. james and elizabeth get married after the fact, and fall in love some. at the time of writing this post it's got these beautiful round numbers i am SO pleased

5. do you respond to comments? almost certainly. sometimes i won't on really old pieces or comments that don't really necessitate a reply, but i do my best :—)

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? i trend more bittersweet than angsty; o sleeper (ff7, cloud/aerith) is one of the only ones i'd classify as TRULY angsty, everything else ends much higher.

7. what's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? showing their versatility: slowly (ff7, also cloud/aerith) ends a little bittersweetly but the climax of this fic remains the sappiest, gushiest thing i've ever written

8. do you get hate on fics? i don't think i've gotten hate since the ff.net days and i'm grateful for it

9. do you write smut? a little, but nothing wild or worth posting. otherwise we're always fading to black or describing sex vaguely babey

10. do you write crossovers? what's the craziest one you've written? it's not my forte, per se, but the potc/temeraire universe is over 50k words and still will not let me go, so you could say i've dabbled.

11. have you had a fic stolen? / 12. have you had a fic translated? / 13. have you ever co-written a fic? no to all the above 🤪 (or...at least i hope, in the case of 11)

14. what's your all-time favorite ship? 8-year-old me was really onto something when she latched onto cloud/aerith with passion unrivaled to be honest. there is no use denying it

15. what's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? i have been working on a written version of the trespasser DLC for one of my dragon age characters for like.............three years now and it will never evolved past the five scenes i have scribbled down i'm afraid. the quarantine brainrot was real but it did not last

16. what are your writing strengths? i like to fancy myself good at description! and i'm very particular about flow and tone. there's nothing i won't do to maintain tone, even if it hurts to cut segments that don't fit

17. what are your writing weaknesses? alas, describing shit well means that i am terrible at stepping back and letting a scene breathe. i feel the need to explain stuff that doesn't need it, to my own detriment. and lately i just Cannot thread the needle with any transitions between scenes. someone come cure my yips it's extremely annoying balking at this

18. thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? it CAN work but the only time i'm ever using it is if 1) i know someone who speaks the language, so i'm not making an ass of myself, or 2) it adds to the confusion of a scene in a meaningful way. rarely does it come up and rarely do i employ it

19. first fandom you wrote for? i'm sure it was kingdom hearts. the more things change, etc.

20. favorite fic you've written? the aforementioned potc/temeraire crossover aside...i could play coy here, but you KNOW it's steadfast & dependable (6k, potc, norribeth. but. it's complicated). she is my beautiful girlfriend and the concept continues to compel me on rereads

tagging @johnbly @thesumdancekid @graysongraysoff @antique-romantic if you're feelin it??? and also 🫵 you, the girl reading this

[mitochondriencocktail]

you wrote a trans!jere fic last year and i've always been curious about them (ik it's a pwp but still lol) so 1, 16/17 for that au 💚

AYOOOO what a good callback, thank you for this!! I don't think I had much in mind for that short pwp, BUT let's see what I can concoct right now. I'll say it's a non-ESC AU LOL

1. Which one is more open about their love life?

Oh, I think they're both disgustingly in love and open about it. Especially after the first year or so, where they navigate this new world of figuring things out and what to expect.

16. Are they each other’s first serious relationship?

I'm gonna say no 🤔 I think Jere, especially pre-transition, had gone through a handful of relationships in a search for answers and acceptance and identity. He had a long-term one that was genuinely great and right on the cusp of him transitioning, but he needed some time to think about who he was and what he wanted, so they remained amicable and broke up.

Bojan's had a few things here and there, one serious one, but nothing ever really stuck. He's ended things, they've ended things, some are still in touch, some aren't. He'd mainly stuck with cis people though and the thought of dating someone trans hadn't crossed his mind until he'd met Jere. I will say, I can see his dating history definitely getting more queer the further along he goes. He had a crisis or two along the way before becoming chill with it.

(this got long, so the other question under the cut lol)

17. If not, how do things learned from previous relationships affect their current relationship?

I think Jere's learned to be fairly cautious and has a means of fielding people's perception of him. Is it just a passing curiosity? Are they genuinely interested in him? Is it a fetish for them? Do they see him as an actual person? What are their thoughts about others who don't pass as well as him? He's typically stayed within the queer dating scene that he knows, so when Bojan appears out of seemingly nowhere, he's simultaneously skeptical and--per BoJere tradition--enamored. Bojan is just Some Guy and he's clearly also figuring out how to navigate dating a trans person, but he's so open and respectful about it, even when he fumbles something, and is willing to learn, so Jere's not sure what to do at first with all this undivided attention on him.

For Bojan, he's very aware by this point in his life that he's Not Straight. He's interested in a variety of people, he's open to all sorts, but Jere's the first trans person he's been with. He has to sit with it for a moment and think about what his feelings are on it, for both his and Jere's sake, but he quickly comes to the conclusion that he's just enamored by Jere as a person and that's all that matters. He learns, obviously, there's more to it and wants to keep learning, but ultimately he just wants to build something beautiful with Jere and explore whatever connection it is that they have. Bojan knows he can also have a tendency to steamroll with his opinions, so he's learned from previous relationships to let Jere speak on the things that are important to him. AKA Bojan not taking the microphone away from Jere when there's a question that Jere has a much more knowledgable opinion on LOL

[buffyfan145]

Fellowship of Fans didn't have any scoops today but instead they posted 6 of the actors their sources are telling them are the standouts so far for season 2 of "Rings of Power" and excitement for their storylines!!! :D Posting behind a cut since it includes previous spoilers. FOF's tweets are in quotes while my thoughts are right below it but making me even more excited for s2.

"Adar (Recast) Sam Hazeldine We have been hearing particularly great things about Sam who despite the recast has made the role his own now with even more threat. Adar is a big part of this second season."

This fits with a lot of spoilers and from what we've seen about why Joseph left as they've expanded Adar's role far beyond the few episodes Joseph originally signed up for in season 1. Really excited to see what's going to happen as Adar seems to be a major character in season 2 and now that Halbrand/Sauron is back.

2. "Celeborn - Calam Lynch Just like we said in a similar thread we did for S1 where we stated internally that people thought Ismael had star potential and could be the face of the show, for season 2 we have heard the same things but this time for Calam Lynch."

Now this one I'm not so sure about since Calam actually wasn't able to film for most of season 2 due to a play he did in England. I don't think he'll actually have that much screen time as he only filmed for a bit last fall, took months off for his play, and then came back in late May/early June when filming wrapped. They could spread his scenes out but he's also still only recurring for s2 and not a regular yet. But could be this source means that the screen time he does have will be memorable and setting up for s3.

3. "Sauron (Charlie Vickers) Charlie Vickers foremost loves the lore and the books and we have heard that he has been particularly good in transitioning his performance from a more comedic/rogue- like performance in season 1 to a more serious and threatening character style."

Then this one I expected. We knew already season 2 was going to be Halbrand/Sauron centric from the post-finale interviews with the showrunners and Charlie. So many of us are really excited to see Charlie fully play Sauron and go full villain so that's going to be great to watch.

4. "Nia Towle (Heyla codename) Not much has been revealed about Nia Towle’s performance at except the leaked picture but we have heard that she is a terrific actor and delivered with her role this season."

Nia's character doesn't have a name yet but since she's been pictured with Maxim's Isildur and as a human woman there's already speculation she might be his future wife that was never given a name in the books. So I'm curious to see how this plays out.

5. "Markella Kavenagh (Nori) Markella was great in season 1 and we have heard this has translated to season 2, but we have heard that she particularly cares about the quality of the dialogue and has been vocal about it."

I also expected Markella to be here too with Nori's storyline of leaving her family and exploring the world for the first time with The Stanger. There's a lot of mystery surrounding this storyline and she was part of the filming in Spain that likely will be for scenes in Rhûn.

6. "Robert Aramayo (Elrond) The reason we have included Robert Aramayo on this list is because he loves the books to death and was particularly upset with the reaction to season 1 (as a whole) and is now very serious when on set and in character (before shooting) so he can deliver the best performance when the cameras roll. Though it’s been clarified it’s not at the level of a method actor but he wants the best for the show and is very passionate which translates to his acting technique."

Then finally Robert made the list but unlike what FOF wrote I had a feeling Elrond's going to get more storyline too especially with the confirmed 2 episode battle that supposedly is happening to end the season in eps 2.7 and 2.8. Elrond's never really faced battle and war now but will with this and that likely will change him as he struggles with it.

[bookofmirth]

hi! sorry to come into your inbox with Gwynriel since I know they are not really your preferred ship, but I just love your insights!🙈

I really hope they will be endgame and I can't wait for their story to be told, but I am also anxious about it... What I mean is, since the series is transitioning into adult, there is a lot of pressure from the audience for the sex scenes (esp. with Sarah dropping the bomb of Az being a freak in bed) and I'm afraid the sex will be rushed between them, before they are (at least somewhat) healed and ready. Their interactions right now are just so healthy and wholesome. 🥺 and personally I would hate if they would go into a Nessian kind of "just sex" arrangement (honestly this was so annoying in acosf!! "Thanks for the ride Nes" ?? ouch Cassian... 😑).

I would love a friends to lovers plotline for them, they both have severe traumas and need healing first outside of a romantic relationship - especially Az! I'm not worried about how Gwyn's trauma will be handled bc I'm sure Az will be the most patient, understanding and attentive lover, I'm just worried that if the sex comes too early on it will mess up their overall dynamic if that makes sense 😅

I honestly can't handle another Nessian where it's painfully obvious they are head over heals for each other but they are in denial for half a book claiming "just sex" 😫 Also if Az pulls a "you are better off without me" I will scream 😑

I hope they will build a very solid friendship first that can transition into love, but I think that would take a bit of time. I wouldn't mind waiting for the sex scenes between them and them not jumping into it like Nessian. (I have this headcanon where Az goes to a pleasure hall in the beginning of the book to get his freak on to get it out of his system a bit 🤭)

Anyways, so I just wanted to hear your thoughts on this - do you think there will be pressure for the sex, since now the series is considered adult?

Many thanks and have a nice day!

Hello! Thanks for acknowledging that there at the beginning. It was very thoughtful of you.

I just can't see them having a friends with benefits situation! With Gwyn, she's interested in sex and reading romance books. As far as romance, I'm not sure what she wants. She comes to the world with such a different view of sex than the human characters had, like she took participation in one of the sexy rites for granted, she just happened to not be able to participate.

And with Az, from what we know, all he's had are secretive flings. I can't see his endgame starting that way, in the dark, behind closed doors, "casual". I just think he'd need something different, and it will probably make him a bit off-kilter to finally combine romance and sex, since his experience rarely (never?) had those two things together, with one person.

I don't think there will be pressure for sex, given that sjm has written fade-to-black (I'm thinking elorcan, by then the series was full on sexy) and there is zero sex (that I can remember) in hoeab. She says things in her interviews that don't make it into books, like the threesome scene in acosf that she wrote and left out, I think she wrote rowaelin smut for herself prior to them getting together in canon. But what happens in the books needs to make sense for the larger context of where the characters are at emotionally, and how the plot is pushing them together or driving them apart. And that includes sex.

I'm genuinely so curious how the romantic feelings will develop because it does seem right now that Gwyn is flirty, and Az totally seems like the type to be oblivious about it ("you're the new ribbon, Az") so IDK!!! I absolutely agree with you and would love a friends-to-lovers situation because I think it would give them emotional vulnerability and support followed by intense trust would lead to such a great moment of "OH." Imagine the "OH" if they are friends and fiercely competitive and working together and then idk, one day one of them looks at the other just a little bit differently.

Imagine he does go to the pleasure hall and finds himself thinking of Gwyn. :D "OH."

[arlecchno]

since mission accomplished is coming to an end, here are some songs i listen to while i write for the series :>

kinda listed a whole lot more than i intended to but whatever 😭 the ma playlist i have is much longer than the songs i've listed here

not proofread because i wrote this in like 20 minutes and i need to study

- hold on by flor

this song was kinda big in the editor community (yes i used to be an editor lmao) and it just stick with me until now. very fluffy and cute song definitely made for them

labyrinth by taylor swift

you know that chorus part “uh oh, i'm falling in love” which is the realisation part, and it transitions to denial “oh no, i'm falling in love again” then finally acceptance “oh, i'm falling in love.” ??? yeah that part is specially made for y/n

- sunshine and city lights by greyson chance

mostly based on chap 5, but i listen to this whenever i write the soft, comforting and vulnerable scenes

- come back... be here by taylor swift

basically what the title says. they both won't admit it because of their pride but they just desperately want each other to come back after the fight

- wishing we were more than friends by push baby

this is the epitome of their whole relationship actually

- all i need to hear by the 1975

when i first heard this song when the album came out,, i immediately thought of them. it's been in my playlist ever since

- story of us by taylor swift

very very based on chap 22. they're so stupid and silly how can they even go on a month avoiding each other?

- oh no (i think i'm in love) by blossoms

i was browsing through songs to add to the ma playlist and i stumbled upon this which is like. their song. basically the realisation part of falling in love

- snow on the beach by taylor swift ft. lana del rey

this song is about falling in love with someone at the same time as they're falling in love with you. and i think that it matches them perfectly

- (what i wish just one person would say to me) by lany

this is definitely how both y/n and scara felt when they decided to go off on their own ways for the past month

- jump then fall by taylor swift

this song is specifically for one of the special episodes i'm planning on doing after ma ends (or make it into the epilogue) but i'll just slip this here. very fluffy it's just about being in a cute relationship

and lastly...

- the great war by taylor swift

need i say more. this is kind of a mix of both the recent chapters and the next two chapters where the climax happens, which is like, the part i've been planning months for. the mission they're both risking their lives for, and the big conflict in their relationship sums up the song perfectly. will they make it through it all?

definitely give these songs a listen! maybe while you're reading the ma series too... who knows if it'll boost up the experience

i'm a huge taylor fan if it wasn't obvious already lmao!! most of her songs just do it for me

[bellaxgiornata]

As is no surprise, this was a long winded answer to your questions so I'm just going to put everything below the cut!!

It's totally normal to be critical about your writing, honestly. I've also always been told that's a good thing, too, because you're able to recognize where you can make improvements and grow the more you practice with your writing because you can point out "problem areas." I don't think I've ever written a fic where I don't nitpick a word choice or the way a sentence is structured or what feels like a bad transition to me. That's actually why I hate editing--because I hate rereading my own words over and over and struggling to make it sound better😆 Many times I feel like things don't flow when I write, too. But that's the beauty of drafts, you can just get whatever you can written out and come back and edit it later. Sometimes you might need to scrap an entire section, which is painful because it feels like you wasted time, but it's sometimes the right thing to do.

As for imposter syndrome...I don't think that ever goes away. I always feel it, I know other fic writers that feel it, and I've heard professional published writers say they feel it. I think it's just part of creating art (or just being human). But seeing people genuinely enjoy your work is what helps to quiet that part of your brain so you can keep doing it! But don't worry, I still feel it all the time so you wouldn't be alone!

As for writing as a married mom....I've definitely had less and less time lately 😅 As for where I write, I currently have an office that is quickly becoming a nursery and then my PC will soon be in my husband's office and we'll have to share. So then I either use a laptop or my phone (I write a lot on my phone) or a tablet with a keyboard for some peace and quiet wherever I can get it.

As for time, I'm a stay at home mom, so I used to get some morning time and time when my son napped every afternoon basically guaranteed to write. Then some evenings during the week I occasionally wrote before bed if a scene was stuck in my head. But I think around last August my son dropped naps completely and that significantly cut back my free time. Becoming pregnant has also made me way too tired to write in the evenings before bed so I don't do that either now. And obviously I'm having a baby in just over a month at this point, which is going to put me on a writing hiatus for a little bit (hence me stockpiling rough drafts right now so I can hopefully still release things here and there), but my toddler will be starting preschool at the end of August and going Mon-Fri for two and a half hours which I'm hoping will give me free time to occasionally write again...assuming I don't have a colicky baby or one who refuses to ever nap 😅😅😅 Then eventually my son will be in school full time the following year and it'll just be me and a 1 year old at home during the day who will hopefully nap and give me that weekday free time back.

I'm also fortunate that my parents and my husband's parents are all retired and live like five minutes from us so we can get outside help with childcare. My MIL is amazing and always takes my son Fridays and Sundays for most of the day. Which lets the husband and I get things done around the house or have date days or focus on our hobbies. I'm aware that we're very, very fortunate for that because it's not common for parents to get that kind of free time. But my MIL is amazing and she's great with my son who we've thought had ADHD for a long time now (he's too young to officially diagnose) and may have sensory processing issues that we've been spending a lot of time working on him with and taking him to multiple therapists for over the past few months--so fanfic is my mental escape from a lot of stress while he has fun with grandma.

My husband knows I write fanfic and he knows what fandoms I write in and that I like romance, but he doesn't specifically know I write smut for y'all 😆 Though, in all honesty, I know he wouldn't give two shits that I do (and I wouldn't be surprised if he already figured as much). He'd probably be encouraging me to let him read it if anything, but I'm just too bashful to be like 'hey, here's some porn I wrote babe' 🤣 He's always been very supportive of my writing though. In your situation, it's totally up to you how you approach that if you want to write smut! I personally see nothing wrong with it, it's no different than writing a published erotica novel you'd find at a bookstore. Even a fictionalized romance character you make up in your mind for an original story is probably fashioned after some real life celebrity or something in your head anyway. But that's just my take and my hubs and I are very comfortable in our relationship, so my little fictional slutty men wouldn't bother him 😆 But also, your husband doesn't need to read your fanfic either, right? You could be writing any type of fanfic, honestly.

Do you have any tips for people who really enjoy writing fanfiction but struggle to actually get themselves to write it? Like I love writing specific scenarios in my head (mainly because that’s what I really want to read but no one else has written that yet) but I struggle to actually just get the motivation to do it, so my ideas just stay in my brain as a “I want to write this” and then the interest dies off and it never gets written.

I completely understand this feeling so much. Before I started writing in the Daredevil fandom I often just daydreamed in-depth scenarios in my head. I usually wanted to write them into stories but then I just...never did it. Even though I have been writing different fanfics in different fandoms for a really long time, I more often than not just created up scenarios that lived in my head and then that was it because I never wrote them down. So nothing ever came of them and I was never able to share them with anyone. I could have written so many more things if I'd just sat down and tried.

(As always, I'm long winded so more below the cut 😅)

In all honesty when this happens, I think the best thing to do is just that. Just sit down in front of a blank document and free write whatever comes to you. Take the pressure off of yourself first and foremost, though--you don't have to share whatever comes out with anyone. Don't tell yourself that it has to be good, either. Have literally zero expectations for whatever ends up on the page. More often than not, that really helps the words start to flow. When you sit there and nitpick how you're starting a sentence or a scene or a word choice, that's when you start second guessing everything and that can often lead to thoughts like "I can't do this" or "no one will read this" or the classic "I suck at this" (which I still hear in my head some days). Ignore all that bullshit and just focus on whatever it is that's in your head--a conversation between some characters, maybe an entire scene you've had playing out in your mind, a fight scene, or whatever it is that you're currently excited about. Just sit down and try to get it out with no expectations. Because you can absolutely always come back to it and edit it up how you want after the fact and make it into a story or a one shot or whatever if you want, but the hardest part is just getting something out on a page.

But truthfully, the only way to write something is to make yourself sit down and do it. I don't know of any other tips to give besides that. Sure, you can make a playlist or a mood board for the vibe of a story or a character. You can make outlines of what you're seeing in your head that'll give you bullet points of what you picture happening. But really you just have to get excited enough about whatever it is that's on your mind and write it. And I think that's part of the beauty of writing fanfic when you do share it and people interact with it. The commentary and interaction from readers is what helps keep the excitement for a story alive for the writer, which then gives us that necessary motivation to keep coming back to work on a story. Because any writer will tell you that sitting down and getting the words out is hard. Some days it sucks and you have to slog through it to keep going, but that's just a part of the process. Over time it becomes a habit, though.

Hopefully any of that somewhat helped, but unfortunately there isn't some magic answer to make it easier to get started. Having other writers to talk to about your ideas really helps, too. Or just someone to talk with/at about whatever is on your mind. Breaking an entire fic idea into chunks chapter by chapter helps if you're making a big story, but just picking a starting point and writing it is your best bet. I actually first wrote the entirety of Marci and Fog's wedding for FFTD and then worked my way backwards afterwards to start that huge ass series. It all started with those two installments and the idea/scene in my head that I didn't get to until "The Breaking Point" far later. So you can absolutely just start with an idea and expand on it. But unfortunately, you kind of just have to force yourself to start somewhere 😅

[emachinescat]

Psych Season 1: Ranked!

I've been rewatching Psych again, and I thought it would be fun to rank the episodes from "worst" (though there are rarely any "bad" episodes IMO) to best for each season as I watch through. I'd love to know your order as well!

A couple of disclaimers: I'm on season 5 now in my rewatch, so it's been over a month since I watched season 1. Also, this is just my opinion. In no way is this meant to be a definitive list.

#15 - Game, Set ... Muurder? (S01E13)

Honestly, though this is last on my list, it's not because it's bad. For me, it's just pretty unmemorable. I watched it about a month ago and I barely remember any details. It's a pretty run-of-the-mill episode, and a decent mystery, but in my mind, it is what it is. Not bad. Not great. It just exists, and I enjoy it when I do watch it, and then its details slip my mind. Can't put my finger on exactly why, though.

#14 - Pilot (S01E01)

Hear me out. I do love the pilot, and everything it introduced us to. I especially love what an amazing marksman Shawn is shown to be -- that whole scene with Lucinda is one of the best in the season, if not the series, in my opinion. And Don S. Davis (General Hammond from SG1) guest stars! But -- and this is honestly the case of most pilot episodes for any show -- it's not Psych. Not yet. The characters are still cooking; they're not quite themselves yet, and though that's true through here and there most of the first season, it's most obvious in this episode. I think the main reason it's next to last on my list is because when I decide I'm going to watch an episode of Psych, the first one rarely, if ever, comes to mind, unless I'm doing a full rewatch. Ooh, I wrote a whumpier AU of this one, (you can read it on AO3)!

#13 - Woman Seeking Dead Husband: Smokers Okay, No Pets (S01E04)

This really is a fun episode with some great twists. I always enjoy watching it. Some of my favorite parts are Juliet and Lassiter trying to get a feel for one another as partners. Honestly, the only reason it's this low on my list is because I just like the other episodes better.

#12 - Speak Now or Forever Hold Your Piece (S01E03)

I do enjoy this episode a lot, honestly, and I also wrote a whumpier AU of it (you can read it on AO3). There are a lot of great bits in it, and I love seeing what a people person Shawn is, how easily he's able to worm his way into the lives of the wedding party. It's fun seeing him "divine" and use people's own likes and dislikes against them as well, like with the Anglophile and the germaphobe. Again, good episode, but the others are better.

#11 - Who Ya Gonna Call? (S0107)

This is an interesting episode for me, with a pretty crazy twist. It does deal with some pretty serious topics that often weren't taken super seriously or represented well in the media at that time (trans folks and borderline personality disorder), and I'm not qualified to say how well the show handled either of these. Sometimes, I've noticed, you have to take things in shows from this era with a grain of salt. Not many forms of media were very "woke" at this time, and the fact that the transition was treated with a relative amount of respect is pretty impressive (again, though, I'm not qualified to make judgments on this). Either way, it's a pretty fun mystery, and the twist is unexpected for sure!

#10 - He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not, He Loves Me, Oops, He's Dead (S01E11)

This episode has some good Shules scenes, and I lose it every time the gang is forced to go speed dating to solve the mystery. I do really like this episode a lot, honestly. It's got some fun character interactions. The mystery's okay in this one for me -- the characters are where it's at.

#9 - Shawn vs. the Red Phantom (S01E08)

This is a great episode overall -- superheroes and comic cons are a great theme! Also, it gave us Magic Head. My favorite bits will always be those between Lassie and Vick. Their dynamic is amazing in this episode, and the scene in the hospital when Iris is born is both heartwarming and hilarious. The only reason this particular episode isn't higher on the list is because I feel like Shawn isn't quite himself here. The Shawn we know later in the show wouldn't be "too good" for super heroes and comics, I don't think. Much like in the pilot, he doesn't feel "done" yet.

#8 - Poker? I Barely Know Her (S01E14)

I love this episode for a number of reasons. I'm always a fan of Shawn using his skills in a super crazy and impressive way, and his poker playing is a perfect example of this. I also love the deeper level of maturity we see when Shawn has to deal with Brandon. I also love the confidence Henry has in his son at the end. I do NOT love the way Shawn gambles away their money at the end, especially since I know it's just a way for the writers to "reset" the story so they aren't suddenly loaded in the next episode.

#7 - Weekend Warriors (S01E06)

Somehow, this episode to me is both quintessential Psych and one I never really choose to watch unless I'm doing a full watch through. It's fun to see everyone in Civil War era garb, and it's one of the first times we see another interest of Lassiter's. It's a classic Psych episode in my mind, but despite this, it's just not my favorite. This episode does have one of my favorite scenes in all of the show, though, something that I still feel it's a shame they dropped in later seasons: Shawn's perfect recollection and recreation of the battlefield in minute detail is astounding, and I don't know why later seasons painted him so often as a lazy guy who doesn't know how to do real police work, because here, he absolutely shines. And I live for it.

#6 - Cloudy with a Chance of Murder (S01E12)

I honestly don't know why this was the episode they redid (and so poorly, I might add). I think this episode is super fun. Seeing Shawn in court is always a blast, and watching Adam Hornstock grow in confidence and competence because of Shawn is wonderful as well. But honestly, the main reasons this episode is so high on my list are the argument between Shawn and Henry about Shawn's motorcycle accident and the way everyone tries to get Shawn's bike back for him -- but Lassie beats them all to the punch.

#5 - Forget Me Not (S01E09)

This episode deals with a sensitive issue -- memory loss -- so well. It's funny, emotional, and so much fun to watch every time. It's just so well executed, and has some great interactions between Henry and Shawn. The scene where Captain Connors waltzes into the police station thinking he's back on the force gets me in the feels every single time.

#4 - 9 Lives (S01E05)

This episode is one of the most classic of the classics for me. The little boy cat who turns out to be a girl may be one of my biggest factors for loving this episode. Other than that, I don't know how solid of a reason I have for loving this episode other than that when I think of Psych episodes that I'd like to watch at any given time, this one is already high on my list.

#3 - From the Earth to the Starbucks (S01E10)

This episode is in my top three because of the way we see Shawn invest in Lassiter for the first time. It's one of the first times we see him act with completely selfless motives, and it shows us that Shawn truly does care about his frenemy. The mystery is fine, I suppose, but when I'm watching this episode, I'm here for the Shassiter friendship, full stop.

#2- Scary Sherry: Bianca's Toast (S01E15)

I mean, what's not to love about this episode? (Other than Shawn and Gus being 28-year-old-men ogling college girls, but I truly believe that was a sign of the times when the show was made; doesn't make it right, but, remember: grain of salt.) It's creepy, and we get to see Jules go all in undercover for the first time. The scene where Shawn and Gus flee the house, Gus leaving Shawn behind, the way we find ourselves sympathizing with the villain, the "Oh, no -- Gus!" moment, and the ending, where Shawn and Gus are just hanging with Jules... Oh, and anything with Lassie and his new partner! Basically, this episode is top tier.

#1 - Spellingg Bee (S01E02)

This might be the most classic Psych episode in my mind. It has it all: whump, father/son angst, Juliet, the Super Sniffer, and possibly the single funniest scene in the entire show: "BaNAna." This episode is pure, unadulterated perfection. You can also read my whumpier AU on AO3!

So there's season 1 of Psych, ranked from least favorite to most favorite! Feel free to reblog with your own episode order. I'll post my season 2 ranked soon!

[toujoursmiraculous]

Thoughts and Reaction to ROCKETEAR!

It's a long post, but when are these ever really short? xD Seeing Carapace first made me so excited. I've been sad we haven't had much of him in the show. And then I saw that it seemed like Ladynoir was doing pretty good as they only had Carapace helping them this time. More S2 & S3 like. So I was like cool, cool, this is great. But what the heck scientist WHY ARE YOU BRINGING TYRANNOSAURUS REX'S BACK! Obviously she's going to be something big later on, she's too nicely animated not to be back. Not to mention Bob Roth's plans. Anyone else both intrigued but also scared at what that could do later? Big upcoming plot point, I think.

I screamed awwww because this is everything. I've wanted a LB/Carapace and Marinette/Nino friendship bond in this show since season 1. This scene made me incredibly happy! I'm a huge Nino fan, for those that don't know, so you can imagine how much I love this episode. Even though sad Nino.

"Alya, everyone has to believe that you will never use the Miraculous again!" End of episode: So anyway... So what I'm seeing here is, Alya's not fond of the idea of being just a spy, not being in on the action. Even though it's Ladybug's plan. Chat Noir isn't fond of what's going on right now either, where he thinks what's going on is all Ladybug's plans. Alya makes the decision to not do what Ladybug wants and tells Nino she's still Rena Rouge. So what's Chat Noir going to do to go against her? Because that's coming up on the horizon. Despite everything being easier for Marinette since everything's not just on her shoulders now, she's still been unable to play video games with her dad, and we know how much she loves doing that. :c That's really sad she doesn't even have time for her family anymore. DJWifi over here being all adorable. "You don't love me anymore!" Me: *Chat Blanc flashbacks* Alya suggests her new content could be Chat Noir edits and Marinette's like YES DO THOSE. Then those edits helped push Nino into thinking she was into Chat. Big oops. Not gonna lie, the rewind freaked me out for a moment. Last time I saw that was Chat Blanc so I thought something big was up. But nope, it's just like that scene in Puppeteer 2. Ugh poor Nino! He knows something's bothering Alya, but she won't say what it is and her behavior's too off from how she normally is. Poor guy. x.x Grumpy Nino that Carapace doesn't get attention and then they wrote his girlfriend with Chat Noir. I remember when Alya was grumpy for a bit about Rena Rouge not getting a party to celebrate her. Movie Ladybug telling Movie Chat Noir that he's better with Movie Rena Rouge. Is this a reference to the episode in Avatar, The Ember Island Players? Getting strong vibes when Play Aang and Play Katara were like, we're just friends nothing more and it's great! Play Katara was extremely into Play Zuko. I can see why Ladybug dismissed the movie (or was it the previous one since it's been awhile? Maybe?) because Rena Rouge and Chat Noir???? The writers (of the movie) just wanted to be different because everyone can see Ladynoir, unless they're blind. Alya and Nino are Andre's favorite couple. YES THANK YOU. I mean they're not my favorite because Love Square. BUT they're my second favorite next to them. Those kids are super adorable but definitely that kid playing Chat wasn't doing Nino any favors. First picture Alya shows. Chat with a heart tail. Yeah that's not doing her any favors lol. Nino: UGH CHAT NOIR'S COMING IN BETWEEN ME AND MY GIRLFRIEND. I KNOW, I'LL CALL MY BEST FRIEND TO VENT TO ABOUT IT. Best Friend Chat Noir: Best Friend Chat Noir: Welp maybe I should see what's up. Maybe I went a little to hard on the cat charm and she's fallen in love with me. Me: Oh oof here we go. Also can I ask, if anyone knows, who animated this episode? The fluidity is great and it looks really pretty. But it doesn't quite look like SAMG's work either. Whoever did it, I love it. S2 Chat Noir: You're not replacing me with a turtle, are you? :c S4 Nino: Who would want a reckless turtle as a partner? BOYS STOP. But yeah this whole scene had me laughing so hard XD Very dramatic and I love it. Nino's hilarious even when he's worried and sad! I would've absolutely loved to have heard this in English with the old English voice of Nino, but the new one worries me on whether or not he'll do a good job sounding like Nino and less high-pitched and whiny. :/ New York Nino was great but S4 Nino....x.x THE TRANSITION BETWEEN HIS INNER MONOLOGUE AND SPEAKING REGULARLY AGAIN 😂😂😂😂 Brilliant! It doesn't really feel like Miraculous Ladybug this episode, and I love it. Not that I don't love the show as usual but wow this is great. Okay, I want to point out that Chat Noir

probably was more worried about it than he would've been otherwise because of what happened with Marinette in Weredad. It probably made him more cautious about this sort of thing.

LOL Chat's sulking because Alya's laughing at the idea of being interested in him. 😂😂 I know that's a blow to one's ego and all, and he's dealt with this kind of thing a lot so I do feel bad for him, but that is his best friend's girlfriend and he definitely doesn't want her to like him. Alya: With him it's not just ❤️it's *makes massive hand gesture indicating she loves him deeply* SO SO SO CUTE OKAY ALL THIS DJWIFI 😭 Alya: And I don't even know your secret identity! I would never fall in love with someone I don't know. Chat Noir, literally fell in love with Ladybug, whose identity he doesn't know. Well Alya, I wonder if you saying that matters for later somehow.... o.O Nino running away crying is honestly one of the things that hurts me most in the entire show. Ugh. Adrien over here being all, I'm having a good day. I'm happy and smiling and it's great. And then it wasn't. Adrien, if Nino let him and didn't interrupt, would've told him about how Alya really doesn't love Chat Noir, and that would've seriously led up to his identity being exposed since Nino was watching and filmed them. o.o Did you notice how he was going to tell him about it? S4, the basement is where it's at. Adrien: Uhh, when did you arrange all this? Nino: *pounds fist on desk* I ASK THE QUESTIONS! 😂 So like. Why is Nino interrogating Adrien when he's after Chat Noir? He doesn't know they're the same person. XD He's looking at him like Adrien has info he's keeping or something omg.

Also again this animation is so nice. Adrien, feeling uncomfortable and so turns the music off. Nino, wanting his dramatic music on while he interrogates Adrien, turns it back on. Adrien, feeling even more irritated and uncomfortable, wants the music OFF and turns it off. Nino, turns the music back on. This may be a reference to something, I don't know, but lolol it's so funny. This episode is both super hilarious and super angsty! Honestly they've done such a good job in my opinion. Nino: I'm talking about something that I shouldn't tell you! ...but I'm going to tell you anyway! Alya's Rena Rouge and I'm Carapace! Okay but the way Adrien went from shock to utter anger, knocked his chair back and grabbed Nino's shoulders like "Tell me the truth. You two know about each other?" Aw man, my poor sunshine boy. A lot of the stuff bothering Adrien is all circumstantial, none of it is to purposefully keep him in the dark. And yet from his perspective, that's how it looks. "I thought secret identities must be protected at all times! If that was the truth, you would never tell me this!" Alright so three things. If he's referring to him saying that Nino and Alya know about each other, that was situational and important info for him to know now that this is out. It wasn't important to know before this. The time it happened was dire and was really no time to get around it. If he's talking about Nino telling him the secrets, well yeah that's not supposed to happen and Nino broke that trust. But also, I get the feeling pretty strongly at this point Adrien's going to be breaking some rules too and one of which is he's going to tell Nino who he is. Adrien's being too emotional in this scene to not be involved in it all, I'm wondering if that's going to be questioned later by Nino. He's acting like he knows too much to be a random viewer of the heroes like the rest of Paris. Also Adrien's best friend just totally dissed Chat Noir and went off about how he throws himself at Ladybug whenever he sees her with roses and love confessions. 😂😂😂 This is just too funny! "But he's always rejected because Ladybug finds him annoying! And she's completely right!" Omg Nino, that's not the reason anymore, shush! "And then Rena Rouge appears and he goes *tickles under Adrien's chin* hey pretty lady! You look elegant and you have great perfume." OMG does Chat Noir actually say and do stuff like that to Rena Rouge or is he just exaggerating here XD "If I could I would shut his mouth forever!" Yeah Nino, say what you really think about your best friend in the entire world. Yikes poor Adrien though. I never imagined he'd hear all these bad things about himself from his best friend directly like that. :/ That's a major misunderstanding of him. Which kind of pushes me more towards the "he's going to tell Nino" theory. Sad Adrien transformation DDDX Alya: *explained everything about why Chat Noir went over to her house in the middle of the night* Marinette *facepalm* Ugh that Chat Noir... Well at least there will be no misunderstandings there! xD "Chat Noir, you stole Alya from me! I will steal your life from you." Good lord man calm down. You can't just kill a man! Fanon: Chat Noir gets attacked by a guy over Marinette. Canon: Chat Noir gets attacked by a guy over Alya. Time to go back to the basement! lol Nino's music's still playing xD And the video is left with it paused on Chat Noir hugging Alya. Marinette looked a bit sad, but it was probably more about the situation being a mess rather than being sad he'd hug her. Meanwhile, Chat Noir's fighting Nino and would rather get beaten up by him than fight. x.x "I can't believe that I doubted you." "I can't believe I chose to do anything but be with you!" She wiped away akumatized Nino's tear just like how Ladybug wiped away akumatized Chat Noir's. ALL THE PARALLELS 😭😭😭 But that hug is so sweet!! Nino broke off the akumatization just like Alya did :o Dang, I wonder if that means something later too. "Love and secrets do not go well together, Ladybug. And I'm sure you have a lot of

them!" Secrets = from Chat Noir. Love = for Chat Noir. Yeah even Shadow Moth knows at this point. xP Thanks for that foreshadowing. Nino's charm is my favorite charm so far! It's my favorite shade of blue. Chat Noir: Everybody has doubts sometimes...even me." Ladybug: Is everything okay, Chat Noir? Chat: Oh yes...pound it!

So um. The placemet of Adrien's poster in between Chat Noir, Ladybug, and just with this entire situation feels very strange. Very intentional. But no clue exactly what that could mean..... Nino and Alya are happy over there watching those two, like they're waiting for them to figure things out or something. But really, Adrien should've talked to Ladybug when he could still do so calmly and be reasonable. I doubt that's going to be the case later on. And honestly Ladybug doesn't even know what's going on. Every episode we've seen really either has them working together or she's unable to be Ladybug when he's unable to be Chat Noir most of the time. I've said it before but these two really need to communicate. Nino and Alya are like a less adorably romantic version of what they'd be. "But they're a couple and they know their secret identities, so why does that rule exist for us but they can know?" Very simple. Because they were temporary holders and the Miraculous they had, Hawk Moth hasn't made it his life's mission to obtain, unlike them, who are permanent holders and Hawk Moth's been after them fiercely to make a Wish that could destroy everything. But. The fact he's asking this, and Marinette's Chat Blanc nightmare, really points in the direction that he's going to eventually find out that while she's thought about telling him all along, Chat Blanc's kept her from doing so.

Okay, so while it looks like he's staring up at the moon, if you notice, it really is just one of the pink bubbles.

Now, they could be making it seem like it's the moon though to give it a double meaning. But poor Kitty, he's feeling so awful right now over in that dark corner Dx Nino felt bad for only two episodes? and it got resolved, so hopefully this all won't last too much longer for him! Marinette had a few shaky episodes so hopefully he'll have a few before it gets resolved. But somehow I think that may be wishful thinking. This episode was so amazing, honestly. Wonderful writing, made me laugh a lot, aw a lot, and hurt a lot. It focused on the core 4 characters which I've wanted more of for a long time. The animation was beautiful. And it just felt so different in such a good way. Chat Noir's having a hard time right now, and I know there's a lot of anger and hate about it going around. But please, think of this as him hitting a rough spot in the road to a much better and brighter future. He's going to end up okay, he'll understand it all someday. And that day's honestly not that far for him if you think about it.