#it's something i still struggle with so i always notice and admire when people actually do do it

[uncanny-tranny]

For transexual Thursday;

Transitioning made me want to live, i struggled with suicide since i was VERY small and i couldn't imagine me having a future. But after a almost if not fully 2 years on t and about almost 4 months after top surgery i can finally feel at peace.

It feels like i belong in this body, that i was destined to form it like clay, my little art project just ment for me and my enjoyment.

I can finally see myself in the mirror and cry in happiness instead of pain, feeling like "yes i am attractive i deserve to love myself and think my body and i are great".

After years of struggle my soul,mind,brain and body are in unity, still separately due to trauma and how i see the word due to different things, but now all are working together instead of tearing each other down.

I love being trans and how complex my identity is due to my experience, culture and autism, it is so much fun finding things that put my feelings in words, discovering more and more who i am, now that I'm at peace with my body.

I love the scars on my chest and that their not picture perfect prettiness telling a story on their own. When i feel down and insecure i look at them and take care of them as a sign to my body that i love it and that I'm so grateful how far it went how much it fought even tho i wished so many times that it just gave up. Within it i wouldn't be able to finally know and feel happiness to know how it feels like to be alive and not survive not knowing if the next day is my last.

Transitioning saved my live and teached me how wonderful live can be.

And while i still fear for my live due to the political climate i am no longer afraid to die if i know i can die as the person i always was. I will fight for my right to know happiness and use the strength i have gathered to fight for other trans people because no one deserve to feel like i did in the past.

That hopefully they also can feel the joy of being trans and how wonderful it can be.

(sorry if it came of as rambling i have the tendency to do that)

Sculpting who you are, to throw yourself on the pottery wheel and, with careful, loving hands, making who you are is such a monumental moment. It's the single-best thing about being able to become, I think

[reidsfilm]

UNDERCOVER — SPENCER REID

dividers credit: cafekitsune.

PARING: spencer reid x fem reader

WARNINGS: crime, blood, spencer being overprotective, (normal warnings in the series) innuendo to spicy time, physical fight, spencer from season 10, hotch and derek being cheeky fuckers, fluff, a bit of angst.

SUMMARY: SUMMARY: You and Spencer are undercover on a case, acting as a couple. When you stray from the original plan, it leads to danger and ends up with your friendship with Spencer being much more than just that.

WORD COUNT : 6,7k

Notes: English is not my first language, so bear with me. There might be spelling mistakes here and there. I need to start watching Criminal Minds. This isn't proofread!

It had started as a normal case. An unsub had been killing women, taking and leaving behind pieces of themselves. You and Reid had been assigned to go undercover in a bar at night to get any possible leads. You were a couple.

And now here you were, sitting at a table in the bar, your legs crossed and head resting gently in your hand. You weren't actually dating. Not at all. Just working together.

Spencer had a hand on your knee, gently tracing small circles with his thumb as he kept an eye on the patrons in the area.

You glanced around the bar, feeling Spencer's touch on your knee. You tried to remain in the undercover character you had created, sipping your drink and feigning being interested in the people around you. It was hard when Spencer was so close to you, but he made you feel protected, even if it was only for a case.

The bar was bustling around you, music playing in the background while people chatted, laughed, danced, and drank. Spencer’s thumb gently tracing circles on your thigh sent a flutter of butterflies to your stomach. It was always like this when the two of you were on a case. It was always so.. different, but no matter what, you trusted him, especially when he got to show his protective side.

You glanced sidelong at Spencer, noticing the small pout that had formed on his lips as he looked around the room. He always wore that expression when he was lost in thought. It was kind of adorable how focused he got. He didn't seem to notice that he was still tracing circles on your thigh, his hand resting there like it was natural. But to you, god it felt like your skin was on fire by his touch.

You continued to watch him, admiring the intensity of his gaze as his eyes scanned the room for any suspicious activity. You knew he was focusing on the case, that was obvious, but as his hand continued to caress your skin beneath the table.. it was becoming increasingly difficult to keep up the act. Why did he have to be so good with his hands?

Spencer suddenly tensed up, his grasp on your knee growing firmer as he spotted something on the other side of the room. He leaned a little closer to you, his breath warm against your ear as he spoke in a low voice. "Someone is watching us. Don't turn around."

Your heart skipped a beat. His closeness alone sent a shiver down your spine, but hearing his voice in your ear? It was almost too much. You struggled to keep your cool as you casually took another sip from your drink, resisting the urge to turn and see who was watching you.

He moves even closer to you, his hand still firmly on your knee. He was acting so casual as if he didn't notice the effect he was having on you. How unfair.

Spencer noticed the shudder that ran through you as he leaned closer. For a moment, he almost forgot about the case at hand as he took in the sight of you struggling to remain collected. He was tempted to tease you for it, but he knew there were more pressing matters. He let out a shaky breath before whispering to you again. "They're coming closer. Stay calm."

Spencer's hold on your knee tightened as he saw the figure approaching your table. You could feel him tense up beside you, his hand remaining a steady presence against your leg. As the person drew closer, you could see that it was a man, tall, with a sinister smile on his face.

He stopped at your table, his eyes flickering between you and Spencer. "Well, well, well. Aren't you two a lovely couple?"

Spencer forced a polite smile, his grip on your knee growing tighter. He could practically feel your anxiety radiating off you, matching his own. This wasn't good. The man's comment had set off alarm bells in his mind. This guy was definitely the unsub.

"Thanks," he replied, feigning nonchalance. "We like to think we make a good pair."

The unsub's gaze lingered on you, his eyes roaming over your body in a way that made Spencer's blood boil. But he kept his cool, knowing that any overt display of jealousy might give away your cover. He leaned slightly in front of you, almost as if he was trying to shield you from the unsub's leering eyes.

The unsub chuckled, clearly enjoying the situation. "You two look so cozy together. How long have you been a couple?"

Spencer's jaw clenched, but he managed to maintain his facade of calmness. He wanted nothing more than to deck this guy, but instead, he chose his words carefully. "Oh, we've been together for a few months now," he said smoothly, his hand rubbing small circles on your leg again.

The unsub's smile widened, clearly finding some sick amusement in this situation. "Well, isn't that just adorable," he cooed, taking a step closer. "You seem very much.. in love."

Spencer suppressed a scoff, his hand clenching into a fist under the table. He would have liked nothing more than to wipe that smug look off the man's face.

You did your best to maintain a calm and cool demeanor despite the growing sense of unease. The unsub's presence was making your skin crawl, but with Spencer's hand resting on your leg and his protective stance, you remained collected.

"He makes me very happy," you said in a soft voice, glancing at Spencer with a smile that was half-genuine, half-act. "I'm a lucky girl."

The unsub's expression turned almost predatory at your comment. "Oh, I bet he does."

Spencer's eyes narrowed as the unsub leered at you, his grip on your leg growing firmer. He forced himself to remain civil, knowing that one wrong move could compromise the entire operation. But it was difficult, especially when he could see how uncomfortable and uneasy this whole situation was making you.

The unsub leaned closer, eyeing you up and down like you were a piece of meat. "He better treat you right," he almost purred. "A pretty thing like you deserves it."

Spencer bristled beside you, his jaw clenching as he bit back a scathing remark. The unsub's leering made him sick, and knowing he couldn't confront the guy outright drove him crazy. He wanted to punch the bastard's lights out, but that would definitely blow your cover.

The unsub smirked, clearly noticing the change in Spencer's demeanor. "Oh, don't like me commenting on your girl." He chuckled. "A little possessive, are we?"

Spencer couldn't hold back any longer.

"Yeah, I am." The words came out through gritted teeth, his hand instinctively rubbing your leg in a possessive gesture. He knew he was letting his emotions get the better of him, but he couldn't help it. Seeing this creep ogling you was driving him mad.

The unsub chuckled again, clearly amused by Spencer's reaction. "Careful now, pretty boy. Wouldn't want to do something you'll regret."

Spencer clenched his jaw tighter, his knuckles turning white as he held back a torrent of profanities. Seeing the unsub taunt him and openly flirt with you was pushing him to the edge. He was about to snap.

Suddenly, as if on cue, Hotch's voice came through your earpieces. "Keep it cool, guys. We've got eyes on you. Don't let him get to you."

Spencer closed his eyes for a moment, taking a deep, slow breath to try and regain control. Listening to Hotch's calm but stern voice cut through the tension, reminding him that they needed to keep their cover intact.

Knowing that the team was watching and they had your backs helped to settle the nerves, but the unsub's unsettling presence was still making your skin crawl. And Spencer's obvious tension only heightened the situation.

Meanwhile, the unsub continued to leer at you and Spencer, enjoying the way he was clearly getting to him.

Spencer was trying to regain his composure. He let out a slow breath, his hand still gripping your knee like a vice, but he was clearly struggling to rein in his emotions. Despite his efforts to appear calm, it was obvious to everyone listening through the earpiece that he was on the verge of exploding.

The unsub, of course, noticed this and seemed to relish the power he had over Spencer. He chuckled again, relishing in his ability to provoke a reaction. "Looks like I hit a nerve."

You did your best to maintain a cool facade, plastering on a polite smile as you spoke. "Yeah, my man can get a little overprotective," you said with a laugh, trying to keep your voice light and casual. "It's kind of sweet, really."

You cast a glance at Spencer, hoping he would pick up the hint and reign in his emotions a bit. But with the way his jaw was clenched, it was like trying to tame a lion with a collar.

The unsub snorted, clearly not buying your attempts to downplay the situation. "Overprotective, huh?"

Spencer's grip on your knee grew even tighter, his knuckles white as he tried not to snap. But the unsub's words and the way he was still eyeing you were only fueling the fire.

A thought suddenly flashed through your mind. An idea. A dangerous one, and definitely against protocol, but you were certain you could handle it. You had to let Spencer know, somehow.

You reached down and gently placed your hand over his, giving it a subtle squeeze, hoping he'd pick up on the cue. Then, as casually as possible, you turned to glance at him. "Baby, I need to use the ladies' room, I'll be right back."

Spencer tensed up even more as you spoke, his eyes flicking to you with a mixture of disbelief and concern. He knew you well enough to know when you had a plan. And Spencer had a bad feeling about this one.

He caught the subtle squeeze of your hand, and the tone in your voice when you spoke to him. Danger, danger, danger. He wanted to protest, to tell you not to go alone, not to put yourself in danger, but you were already standing up and heading towards the bathroom.

You could feel Spencer's eyes on you as you made your way towards the bathroom, the unsub also watching you leave with a leering gaze. You maintained your calm demeanor, but your heart was racing inside. This was dangerous and stupid, but you were certain you could handle it. Hell, Spencer would probably kick your ass after this, but as long as it got the job done...

You reached the restroom door and pushed it open, stepping inside the dimly lit space.

As the door closed behind you, the sound seemed to echo in your ears. You took a deep breath, pushing aside the nerves and reminding yourself that you were trained for this. You could do this.

You glanced at the mirror above the sink, taking a moment to check your reflection. It was still you, same facade, same expression. But there was a flicker of determination in your eyes, something that hadn't been there before. You were ready.

"What are you doing?"

Damn, you'd almost forgotten about the earpiece. But Hotch's voice snapped you back to reality. He'd seen you stand up and walk to the bathroom, and you could sense his concern through the comm link.

"I have a plan." You muttered, your voice barely above a whisper as you stepped further into the bathroom.

There was a brief pause before Hotch's response came through the earpiece. "What kind of plan?"

You could practically feel the disapproval in his voice. But you'd already made up your mind.

"I'm going to try and detain him."

Another pause, longer this time, as Hotch processed what you'd just said. You could almost see the disapproving look on his face. "That's not within protocol," he replied, his tone stern. You know you should wait for further instructions, for backup. But you were set on your plan, no matter how much trouble it would end up getting you in.

"I know," you admitted, your voice still hushed. You stepped over to the sink, pretending to fix your hair in the mirror as you continued your conversation. "But it's the best shot we have at him without causing a scene."

"You're putting yourself in danger," Hotch protested, his voice tight with concern. "We can't risk-"

You interrupted him, your voice firm. "I can handle myself. Just trust me, okay?"

The comm line fell silent for a moment as Hotch considered your request. Trust was a big thing in the BAU, and he knew you well enough to know that you weren't one to take unnecessary risks. But you were determined, and he wasn't about to stop you.

"Be careful," he said after a moment, the hint of reluctance still present in his tone.

"Always am," you replied with a hint of a smirk, your voice regaining some of its usual confidence. The nerves were still there, but you pushed them aside. Time to focus.

"Keep an eye on Spencer, would you? I don't want him charging in here like a bull."

You could hear a huff of amusement through the earpiece as Hotch replied, "I'll try. You know how he is."

You couldn't help but chuckle softly, knowing full well how protective Spencer could be. But you had a job to do, and you needed to remain focused.

"I'll report in once I got him cornered. Wish me luck."

With that, you pulled off the earpiece, not wanting to draw attention to yourself with any potential noises. This was it. Time to see if your plan would work or blow up in your face.

You took one last deep breath, steeling yourself for what was to come. You'd taken care of dangerous suspects before, this was no different. At least, that's what you told yourself.

You reached a hand down to your hip, making sure the small handgun was still secure in its holster. Just in case. Now, all that was left to do was wait and see if the unsub would take the bait.

You stood at the sink for a few moments, fidgeting with your makeup and waiting for any sound that would indicate the unsub was coming. Your heart beat anxiously in your chest, the anticipation growing with each passing second.

Then, you heard the sound of the bathroom door opening and the scrape of shoes on the tiled floor. It was him.

You turned around slowly, forcing a casual expression onto your face. He stood a few feet away, a smirk on his lips as he regarded you. He looked more sinister now, without the cover of the restaurant between you.

"Well, look who we have here," he drawled, his voice sending a shiver down your spine. He took a step closer, his gaze roaming over your body in a way that made your skin crawl.

"Just needing a little touch-up time," you replied, trying to keep your voice light and unbothered. You leaned back against the sink, trying not to flinch as he closed the distance between you.

"Yeah? I think you look perfect to me." He was standing way too close now, his body practically pressed against yours. You could smell the alcohol on his breath and it took everything you had to maintain your composure.

You tried to subtly shift away from him, your heart racing as your back pressed against the cold porcelain of the sink. Your hand casually reached back, fingers inching closer to the gun hidden at your hip.

He seemed to notice your subtle movement and leaned in closer, his gaze flickering down to your hip. "Whatcha got there?" he asked, his voice a low, mocking whisper.

Your heart was hammering against your ribs now, but you tried to keep your voice steady. "What do you mean?" you feigned ignorance, hoping he wouldn't notice the way your palm was slowly closing around the grip of the handgun.

He leaned in even closer, his face just inches from yours. "Don't play dumb. I know you're hiding something." he reached out, his fingers ghosting along the edge of your hip, dangerously close to your gun.

You froze as his fingers brushed against your hip, adrenaline coursing through your veins. It was now or never. You had to act fast.

In a swift, fluid motion, you grabbed his hand and spun him around, pinning his arm behind his back and pushing him against the wall. The sudden movement surprised him, and he let out a grunt of surprise as his face pressed against the cold tiles.

The element of surprise gave you the upper hand for now, but you knew he was still dangerous. "You've got some skills," he grunted, a hint of anger in his voice as he tried to twist out of your grip.

You pushed him harder against the wall, applying even more pressure to his arm. He grunted again, unable to move. "And you talk too much," you retorted, keeping your voice steady despite the adrenaline coursing through you.

You could hear his breathing getting faster, his body tense as he tried to break free. "You think you've got me cornered, huh?" he spat. "You're not the first agent to underestimate me."

"I think I've got you right where I want you," you replied, your grip on his arm tightening. You could feel his muscles straining under your grasp, but he was still pinned against the wall.

Suddenly, he let out a dark chuckle, the sound sending a chill down your spine. "And what makes you think I'm alone?"

Your heart skipped a beat at his words. "What do you mean?" You demanded, your voice steady but your mind racing with the implications of his words. Was he implying that there were more people involved? People who were never mentioned in the case?

"Oh, you really think it's just me in on this?" He twisted his head to look at you, a sly smile on his lips. Despite the situation, he seemed to be enjoying this. "You've been too busy watching me, you didn't even spot the two guys outside."

Your fingers closed around the familiar grip of your gun, heart thundering in your chest as the man advanced towards you. You could hear more gunshots and commotion coming from outside, but that didn't matter right now. You had to focus on staying alive.

And take this man down.

You tried to back away, your back hitting the wall behind you as the unsub stepped closer to you, his gaze locked on yours. "Think you can shoot me, sweetheart?"

Your finger rests on the trigger, ready to shoot if needed. But the unsub is faster than you, managing to grab your gun, and it goes off, sending a bullet into the mirror by the sink, shattering it.

he sudden sound of the gunshot and shattering mirror jarred you, but you fought back against him, your adrenaline kicking into overdrive. You cursed the fact that you were wearing heels, the thin stilettos making it difficult to keep your balance.

You threw a punch, aiming for his face, but he caught your wrist, and the fight turned into a grappling struggle for the gun.

You could feel your heart sink as the gun skidded away from you, the sound of it hitting the tiled floor echoing in your ears like a bad omen. The unsub noticed it too, a victorious glint in his eyes as he took a step back from you.

"Looks like you're out of weapons," he jeered, his voice low and mocking.

You looked around, trying to think quickly. You were outnumbered, unarmed, and trapped in a confined space. The odds were not in your favor, but you refused to give up.

You took a step back, putting some distance between you and the unsub as you scanned the small bathroom for anything that could be used as a weapon. There wasn't much – a few toiletries, a paper towel dispenser, nothing that would be much use against a man twice your size.

The unsub's gaze was on you like a hawk, following your every movement. "Where you think you're going, pretty girl?" he taunted, moving forward slowly, his footsteps echoing loudly in the small space. "You're not gonna get away that easily."

With no chance of running or finding another weapon, you were left with no choice. You clenched your fists, readying yourself for a physical confrontation. You hated hand-to-hand combat, it was never your strong suit, but you had to make do.

"Bring it, buddy," you taunted, trying to sound braver than you felt.

The unsub chuckled at your challenge, stepping closer again. "You've got spirit, I'll give you that," he said, his eyes scanning your form up and down. "But you're way in over your head."

He lunged forward, his hand shooting out to grab you. You managed to dodge the first attempt, twisting your body away from his reach, but he was quick and relentless. He kept coming at you, his movements swift and fluid, like a snake.

You threw a punch, aiming for his face, but he dodged it with ease, his hand catching your wrist and yanking you to the side. You stumbled, the heel of your shoe catching on the edge of a tile. You barely managed to keep your balance, your heart hammering in your chest.

You gasped as he grabbed a handful of your hair and slammed you into the edge of the sink. The impact sent a sharp pain through your skull, making your vision swim for a moment. You tried to fight him off, but he had an iron grip on your hair, keeping you pinned.

The sudden sound of the door crashing open and the sight of your teammates appearing in the doorway sent a wave of relief through you. Hotch, Derek, and even Spencer, all holding their service weapons at the ready.

The unsub's grip on your hair loosened slightly, his eyes wide with surprise at the unexpected arrival. For a moment, it seemed like the tables had turned.

Derek quickly assessed the situation, his eyes scanning over the scene in front of him – you, pinned against the sink, the unsub's hand in your hair, the shattered mirror, and the gun lying just out of reach on the floor.

"You wanna let her go, pal?" he barked, his voice hard and unwavering.

Hotch's gaze fell on you, his eyes instantly locking onto the blood dripping down your face. Concern flashed across his features for a brief moment before he schooled his expression back into his usual stoic demeanor.

"Let go of her," he repeated Derek's command, his voice firm and commanding. "Now."

The unsub didn't move, his eyes darting around the room, calculating his options. But his grip on you loosened as he realized he was outnumbered. He released your hair, his hand dropping away from your scalp.

"Hands on your head," Hotch barked, stepping forward. Derek moved in as well, his gun still raised and aimed directly at the unsub.

Spencer lingered by the doorway, eyes wide and worried as he took in your injured state.

The unsub complied, raising his hands slowly and placing them on the back of his head. He looked resigned, his earlier bravado replaced with a resigned acceptance that he was outnumbered and outgunned.

"Turn around slowly," Hotch instructed, his voice leaving no room for argument. The unsub obeyed, turning slowly to face the wall, his hands still on his head.

Within seconds, Derek had him restrained, his hands cuffed behind his back. Hotch holstered his gun and moved swiftly towards you, Spencer right behind him.

Hotch stepped closer, his eyes scanning over you. His hand reached up to gently cup your chin, tilting your face to the side to examine your face, and the blood trickling down the side.

"How bad is it?" he asked, his voice surprisingly gentle.

Spencer, lingering at Hotch's side, leaned in closer, concern etched in his features. "Does it feel swollen? Are you dizzy?" he rattled off, his usual rambling coming in rapid-fire.

"I'm okay," you assured them, though you leaned slightly into Hotch's touch. Your head throbbed, the adrenaline from the fight starting to wear off.

Hotch gently released your chin, his fingers still lingering near your injury for a moment longer. "We need to get that cleaned up," he said, gesturing to your temple.

Spencer had already taken a handkerchief out of his pocket, gently dabbing at the blood The white cotton quickly stained red as he cleaned the blood away.

"You'll probably need stitches," he commented, his fingers gently prodding the edges of the wound.

The sounds of your teammates clearing the scene faded into the background, leaving you alone with Spencer in the now-silent bathroom. The adrenaline was quickly being replaced by the pain from your injuries, but it was his silence that was unnerving you more than anything

Spencer was focused on cleaning the blood from your face, his touch gentle but his expression unreadable. He didn't say a word, just continued his work silently, but you could tell he was tense, his jaw set in a firm line.

Once he was satisfied that the wound was clean, he finally spoke, breaking the tense silence. "You should've waited for backup," he said, his voice cold and clipped.

He kept his gaze focused on the cut, refusing to meet your eyes. "We could've taken care of this without you getting hurt," he added, his tone bordering on accusation.

"I had it under control," you protested, but even as you said the words, you knew they weren't entirely true. You'd acted impulsively, putting yourself in danger just to prove a point.

Spencer's hands stilled, finally meeting your eyes, his gaze burning with a mix of anger and worry. "Under control? You're bleeding. You could've been killed." His voice was a growl, his frustration palpable.

He looked at you, his eyes searching your face, as if he was trying to see past your bravado and into your true state of mind.

"You can't just throw yourself into danger like that," he said, his voice softer now but firm. "We have protocols for a reason."

"I know we have rules and protocols, but sometimes situations don't allow us the luxury of following them," you muttered, your stubbornness rearing its head even in your injured state. "I didn't feel like I had a choice."

Spencer's grip on your head tightened for a moment, his jaw clenching as he fought back a more heated retort. He exhaled through his nostrils, his frustration clear.

"There's always a choice," he argued, his voice a low growl. "You just took the most reckless one."

Spencer's eyes flicked over your face, lingering on the gash on your temple for a moment before moving down to your lips. The atmosphere was thick with the kind of tension familiar to both of you, leading to late nights and whispered secrets.

"You don't get to throw yourself into danger like that and expect me not to worry," he nearly hissed.

He was standing close, his body practically leaning over you as he tended to your wound. His hands were still on your face, one gently holding the side of your head while the other held the handkerchief against your skin.

As he spoke, you could feel his breath, warm against your cheek. "Don't do that again," he said, his voice dropping to a whisper. "Don't make me worry like that."

"I can't promise that I won't get myself into dangerous situations," you said quietly, your eyes meeting his stare. "It's part of the job."

There was a pause, the tension thick between you. His hands were still gently cradling your head, but his touch felt more possessive now, like he was silently claiming you as his.

"Just promise me you'll be more careful," he said, his voice pleading.

His fingers trembled slightly against your skin, the vulnerability in his voice only increasing your desire to comfort him. You reached up and gently laid your hand over his, silently reassuring him that you were okay.

"I will," you whispered. "I promise."

A small smile tugged at the corners of your mouth, an idea forming in your mind. You knew that one way to get past Spencer's stubborn facade was through bribery, particularly with his sweet tooth.

"How about this," you began, your voice taking on a slightly teasing tone. "I'll be more careful, and I'll buy you some donuts as an apology for worrying you

His eyes widened slightly, a flicker of surprise flashing through them. It was almost comical how quickly you saw him crumble, his resolve melting under the suggestion of donuts.

"You're bribing me with sugar," he stated, sounding almost offended, yet the corners of his mouth were twitching upwards.

"Is it working?" you asked, grinning up at him. You could practically see his weak willpower crumbling away. Donuts were his kryptonite.

Spencer tried to maintain his stoic exterior, but the way his eyes lit up betrayed his true feelings. He was a sucker for donuts, and you knew it.

"I mean, it's not the worst bribe," he admitted, his voice laced with resignation but also with a hint of playfulness.

You let out a soft laugh, his feigned resistance amusing you. He could pretend to be mad all he wanted, but you knew he was already imagining the taste of those sugary treats.

"I'll even get the ones with sprinkles," you promised, knowing that would practically seal the deal.

"Sprinkles?" he repeated, his voice a little too eager to be convincing. "You know me so well."

He tried to play it cool, but his eyes betrayed his excitement. It was almost endearing how easily the idea of donuts broke down his defensive walls.

"Of course I do," you said, a hint of satisfaction in your voice. "I know exactly how to get you to forgive me."

You knew that donuts were his weakness, and you were more than willing to exploit it when necessary. After all, it was a small price to pay for Spencer's forgiveness.

He looked down at you, a hint of embarrassment creeping into his expression. He was fully aware of his sweet tooth and the power it held.

"You're not playing fair," he muttered, but there was no real heat behind his words.

He knew he was defeated, and deep down, he was probably already planning which donuts he wanted.

You couldn't help but chuckle at his response. He was adorable when he was trying to resist, even though you both knew he was fighting a losing battle.

"I never said I would play fair," you teased, a cheeky smile on your face. "I play to win, and this time, winning means getting you a dozen donuts."

Spencer flushed, his cheeks coloring slightly under your touch. He hadn't expected the gentle gesture, and his usually stoic demeanor faltered for a moment.

He turned his head, his gaze meeting yours. He looked a little flustered, his usual controlled expression replaced with a hint of vulnerability.

"That's...that's a good start," he murmured, his voice a little shaky.

He swallowed, trying to regain his composure but failing. The simple act of you kissing his cheek had thrown him off balance.

"But it's going to take more than that to truly make it up to me," he said, his voice regaining a bit of its usual teasing tone.

He leaned in a little closer, the air between you growing more charged. His eyes held a hint of mischief, his smile growing wider.

"I mean, I do like donuts, but I think I'm going to need something a little more substantial as a true apology," he whispered, his voice low and suggestive.

His hand lightly rested on your cheek, his thumb tracing a gentle path over your skin. He was being playful now, his usual serious demeanor giving way to his more flirtatious side.

His hand moved down to your chin, his touch light but deliberate. He tilted your face up to meet his gaze, his eyes darkened with desire.

"Can you think of anything more substantial that might serve as an adequate apology?" he murmured, his voice dripping with suggestion.

You felt yourself shiver under his touch, your body responding to his proximity and his words. There was a hint of hunger in his eyes, and it sent a thrill through you.

"Maybe," you replied, your voice a little breathless. "But I think I'll need a hint first. I wouldn't want to disappoint my favorite genius."

Spencer's smile widened, his fingers tracing a slow path down your jawline. He leaned in, his mouth close to your ear.

"Hmm," he pretended to think, his hot breath against your skin sending another shiver down your spine. "Perhaps the apology should be a little more... physical."

His hand moved from your chin down to your neck, his fingers lightly tracing the sensitive skin there. He was so close to you now, his body almost pressed against yours.

You could feel the heat radiating off him, his breath growing a bit heavier as he continued to toy with you.

"Something that involves a lot of... touching," he whispered, his voice low and seductive.

His hand moved lower, his fingers tracing a path down your collarbone, down your arm, and finally settling on your hip. His grip was firm but gentle, his touch possessive.

He stepped even closer, his body flush against yours now. You could feel the heat of his chest against yours, his heart beating a little quicker.

"That's the kind of apology I might forgive," he murmured, his mouth hovering just above yours.

He was so close, his eyes locked with yours. His thumb continued to trail patterns on your hip, his touch both maddening and exhilarating.

His hand slid around to the small of your back, pulling you even closer. He leaned down, his mouth now just a whisper away from yours.

"I'm a very tactile person," he whispered, his voice dripping with implication. "I need to feel my apologies, not just hear them."

Your pulse quickened at his words, his proximity and his touch sending a wave of heat through you.

You reached up, tangling your fingers in his hair and pulling his mouth close to yours. "Then I guess I'll just have to make sure my apology is extra convincing," you whispered, your voice husky with desire.

You closed the remaining distance between your lips, kissing him hard.

Spencer let out a soft groan at the contact, his hand on your back tightening as he pulled you close. He responded immediately, his mouth moving against yours with a ferocity that caught you off guard.

He tasted like coffee and some lingering sweetness, a combination that was irresistibly addictive. He nipped at your lips, his hands roaming over your body, touching and caressing with an increasing hunger.

The sound of the bathroom door made you both pull away. You looked past Spencer to see Hotch and Derek.

Derek's smirk widened as he saw the two of you quickly pull away from one another.

"Well, well, well," he said, his voice dripping with feigned innocence. "Looks like we've interrupted something."

Hotch couldn't help but chuckle, his gaze flickering between you and Spencer. Hotch pulled out his wallet, handing Derek a 50$ bill.

You looked between Hotch and Derek, your confusion deepening at the sight of the fifties changing hands.

"What are you two doing?" you asked, your voice a mix of amusement and bemusement.

"Oh, we just had a little bet going," Derek explained, his smirk widening.

Hotch nodded in agreement, his expression still one of mild amusement. "We bet on when you two would finally stop dancing around each other and just admit your feelings," he explained.

Your confusion slowly turned to embarrassment at their words. They had been betting on your relationship?

You shot a glance over at Spencer, who was looking just as flustered as you were. He was clearly still a little worked up from your earlier encounter, his cheeks slightly flushed and his hair a little disheveled.

"You two bet money on our love life?" you exclaimed, your voice a mix of amusement and indignation.

Derek chuckled, pocketing the money Hotch had handed over. "Guilty as charged," he said, his grin unapologetic.

Hotch shrugged, his expression still mild but with a hint of amusement. "Consider it a friendly wager," he said.

"Friendly wager or not, you two are unbelievable," you muttered, still a little flustered but trying to play it off with a laugh.

Spencer, on the other hand, was trying to regain his composure. He ran a hand through his hair, fixing his disheveled locks and trying to look unfazed.

"It's not like we were the only ones making bets," Derek pointed out, his gaze flickering over to Spencer. "JJ and Penelope have had a bet going on for months."

Spencer's face flushed even deeper at Derek's words. JJ and Penelope had been betting on your relationship too?

You couldn't help but laugh at Spencer's reaction to Derek's revelation. His expression was a mix of mortification and resignation, as if he had known deep down that the rest of the team was watching the slow burn between you two.

You turned to him, nudging him playfully. "Looks like we're the talk of the office, genius."

Spencer let out a sigh, his shoulders slumping a bit at your comment. "Great," he mumbled, running a hand through his hair again. "Just what I need, the whole team betting on our relationship."

He looked down at you, his expression a mix of resignation and fondness. "But I guess it was only a matter of time before we gave them something to talk about."

You gave him a reassuring smile, reaching up to touch his arm. "Hey, at least they seem to think we're a good match," you joked, trying to lighten the mood.

Hotch and Derek chuckled again at your comment, their grins still just as knowing.

Spencer let out another sigh, rolling his eyes exaggeratedly. "Yeah, and they're enjoying our... progression a little too much," he grumbled, his voice still a little flustered.

Derek let out a bark of laughter at Spencer's tone. "Oh, come on, Reid. Lighten up. We're just happy you two finally got your act together."

Hotch nodded in agreement. "And I have to say, I've never seen you quite so worked up over someone before," he observed, a hint of amusement in his voice.

Spencer's cheeks colored again at Hotch's remark. He shot him a glare, but it was half-hearted at best.

"Can we please stop discussing my love life," he muttered, shifting his weight awkwardly.

Derek and Hotch exchanged another smirk, obviously enjoying their ability to embarrass him.

You guys left the restroom and the bar all together. The unsub as and the two others had been detained and taken to interrogation. The EMTs had just finished tending to your injured head the wound was cleaned and plastered but thankfully did not require stitches. You were sitting on the edge of the ambulance, a blanket draped around you

Spencer hovered over you, his expression one of concern. He had been by your side the whole time, watching as the EMTs cleaned and bandaged your wound.

Now, he was sitting next to you on the edge of the ambulance, his hand resting on your leg. He was silent for a moment, his eyes focused on your face, taking in the sight of the bandaid plastered against your forehead.

"About earlier...in the bathroom..." you began, your voice soft.

Spencer's hand stiffened a little on your leg at your sudden mention of the kiss.

He swallowed, his gaze flickering away from yours for a moment before coming back to meet your eyes. "It...it meant something," he said, his voice hesitant. His eyes searched your face as if looking for some sort of confirmation. "At least, it did to me."

You smiled at his words, your heart fluttering at the sincerity in his voice. "Good," you said, your voice soft. "Because it meant a lot to me too."

You reached up, your hand gently tracing the line of his jaw. You could see the emotions flickering across his face, his usual stoic veneer cracked just a bit.

"I still owe you a dozen donuts," you reminded him, your voice light.

Yeah," he mumbled, his eyes flickering with a mixture of annoyance and resignation. "But I think I'd rather have another kiss than a dozen donuts."

He looked down, his expression a little contrite. "Not that I don't still want the donuts," he added quickly, a hint of a smile playing at the corner of his mouth.

You leaned forward, your hand still tangled in his hair, pulling his face down to meet yours.

The kiss was soft, a gentle press of lips against yours, filled with tenderness and sweetness. It was different from the urgent, passionate kiss you had shared in the bathroom, this one slow and deliberate.

You thought back to how it all started - how you had both agreed to pretend to be a couple to gain information during the case.

And now, here you were, sitting in the back of an ambulance, your lips still tingling from the kiss you had shared with Spencer. You never could have predicted that this charade would lead to something real, but it did.

Somehow, the lines between acting and reality had blurred, turning your pretend relationship into something completely genuine.

I don't know a lot about Criminal Minds and the characters, so I'm sorry if this is completely different than what the characters would say or do. I haven't watched the series, but I know the basic things.

So I apologize to anyone who's watched the series and that it doesn't match their personality!!!

[sxorpiomooon]

Random things about your future partner a pac reading

Paid readings

Tip me

Other readings

pile 1-

this person is very successful yet very unsatisfied the classic reason I'm getting is that they always thought that they'll be happy once they would have reached that level of success but now that they are at that level they are still unsatisfied. I also see them having alot of leader qualities this is someone that is good at speaking they might be very tall and broad I heard that song "there lived a certain man blahblahblah he was big and strong blahblah" song. They might wear coats alot or might just look good in it. This person is very easily disappointed with themselves and others. They might have some sort of difficulty with food. They might also like champagne and celebrating things I heard classy too. This is someone who is intuitive and very sharp minded. I see their intellectual abilities helping them and others to solve a lot of issues and problems. When you meet them they might be going through a moral dilemma some sort of thing that might be weighting them down "something that should've been noticed has gone unnoticed". They might also be starting something new at that time.

Pile 2-

Someone who is constantly on the search of something new that will welcome them like they belong there. This person is poetic and might travel alot especially in the mountains imma NGL they might be seen as the loser one but it's simply bc they are not on the same path as others and are just taking their time to walk on their path more than others. This is someone who might love walking in nature and might love dressing up for it haha I heard safari and saw a car also saw hobi from bts. They might be very idealistic and alot of times people might curse or not take them seriously for it. Be my lover song keeps on playing. People might also think that they are not taking life seriously and wasting their time but man can a human being not just live cmon. This person will also be funny

Pile 3-

This person struggles in remembering things so they might ramble alot other than that this person is very much into charity and giving others. They have very good relations and good self identity. I see them providing for others and also not being hesitant when they need to ask others for something. This person is very resilient and determined for their future. They might be very hardworking and constantly doing things to live a better life. People might admire them alot I heard "look how far you've come". This person is very courageous and impresses people wherever they go. You know those people who are friends with literally everyone and people actually do love them and they really so love other people too? This person is THAT person. Very happy go lucky genuinely helping people out on their way to wherever they are going. They might like fruits alot I'm seeing a very big pumpkin for some reason. They are also good at inspiring people and people might just randomly give things to them haha. Very cheerful

[lvrgirlrey]

Can you make a Ranpo x reader where Ranpo thought that you were dating him(he never said anything about it too) and one day he kisses your cheek thinking it was a normal thing to do since them both are in a "relationship"

Thank you!!

𝕒𝕦𝕥𝕙𝕠𝕣’𝕤 𝕟𝕠𝕥𝕖: hello! this is so cute of course i can do it for you *v* thank you for requesting!

𝕔𝕠𝕟𝕥𝕖𝕟𝕥 𝕨𝕒𝕣𝕟𝕚𝕟𝕘𝕤: none this is purely fluff

it was a usual day at the armed detective agency, filled with the usual noise of bustling keyboards, phone calls, and the quiet mutterings of people hard at work. you sat at your desk, deeply engrossed in some case notes, oblivious to the figure quietly munching on snacks from across the room. ranpo edogawa was sprawled lazily on a chair, his usual candy stick in hand, eyes half-lidded but never missing a detail.

you and ranpo had become close over the last few months, working cases together, sharing snacks, and engaging in idle conversations. despite his carefree, sometimes childlike demeanor, ranpo always seemed to gravitate toward you. it was sweet, in a way. you admired him for his brilliance, though his eccentricity and arrogance sometimes made him hard to understand.

recently, though, things had begun to change. ranpo’s attention toward you had become more intense—subtle but noticeable. he would stand just a little too close when talking, sometimes brush his hand against yours when passing you something, or give you one of his sweet, playful smiles that left your stomach doing somersaults. but since ranpo was, well, ranpo, you chalked it up to him just being his quirky self. nothing more. at least, that’s what you told yourself.

you’d never considered the possibility of anything romantic between the two of you, though your heart couldn’t help but flutter every time he was near. still, you were too caught up in your work, too focused on your role in the agency to give those feelings much attention.

until today.

it was mid-afternoon, and the agency office was quieter than usual. the team had split off for various tasks, leaving you and ranpo alone. you were scribbling notes, trying to piece together the details of a complex case, when you felt ranpo’s familiar presence standing behind you.

without glancing up, you smiled, assuming he was there to ask about the case. “hey, ranpo. need something?”

he didn’t respond right away. instead, you felt him lean closer, the scent of sweet candy on his breath mingling with the air. then, before you could fully process what was happening, you felt the soft press of his lips against your cheek.

the kiss was brief but gentle, so casual that it took you a second to react. your mind struggled to keep up with what had just happened. heat instantly flooded your face as your heart raced. you whipped your head around, wide-eyed, to meet ranpo’s easygoing expression.

“what—what was that?” you stammered, unsure if you had somehow imagined the whole thing. ranpo blinked at you, completely unbothered, as if kissing you on the cheek was the most natural thing in the world. he tilted his head, popping another candy into his mouth, then smiled in that mischievous way he always did when he thought he was two steps ahead of everyone.

“what do you mean?” he asked, as though *you* were the one acting strange. “i just kissed my partner. it’s normal, isn’t it?”

you blinked, trying to wrap your head around his words. partner?

“ranpo…” you began slowly, “what are you talking about? we’re… we’re not dating.”

his expression didn’t change at all. if anything, he looked more confused. “what do you mean we’re not? we’ve been together for a while now, haven’t we?”

you opened your mouth to respond but no words came out. what on earth was he talking about? sure, you’d spent a lot of time together, and you were close—really close—but at no point had either of you actually said anything about being in a relationship. you felt a mix of confusion and disbelief wash over you.

“ranpo, we’ve never… i mean, you never asked me out or anything,” you finally managed to say. he waved his hand dismissively, as if the technicalities were trivial. “i didn’t think i needed to. we’ve been together all this time. i figured you knew. i mean, i’ve held your hand before, i let you eat my snacks. that’s pretty obvious, right?”

your brain struggled to keep up with ranpo’s logic. his nonchalant attitude only made your own flustered state worse. you tried to calm your racing heart as you replayed the last few months in your head. yes, he had been more affectionate lately. yes, there had been a few moments that made your heart skip. but none of that meant you were dating. or did it?

you stared at him, completely bewildered. “ranpo… you can’t just assume we’re dating without telling me.”

he gave a small shrug, utterly unfazed by the revelation. “why not? i thought it was obvious. we spend all our time together, and we’re close. i thought you liked me.”

you blinked again, this time trying to process his words. you thought i liked you? was he serious? he was incredibly smart, perceptive beyond belief, and yet completely clueless when it came to matters of the heart.

“i do like you,” you blurted before you could stop yourself. “but that doesn’t mean we’re automatically in a relationship. you have to, you know, ask.”

ranpo’s eyes lit up, a small smile playing on his lips. “so you do like me, huh? well, that’s great! then let’s make it official.”

you stared at him, mouth agape. this wasn’t how you imagined confessing your feelings, but here you were. caught off guard and flustered, you felt your face grow even hotter.

“ranpo, that’s not… i mean… wait, are you serious right now?” he nodded, entirely too casual for the conversation you were having. “of course i’m serious. i already thought we were dating, but now we can make it official. problem solved!”

you were at a complete loss for words. how could someone so brilliant in solving the world’s toughest cases be so dense when it came to relationships? still, you couldn’t help but smile, despite your confusion and embarrassment.

“you’re unbelievable,” you muttered, running a hand through your hair. ranpo leaned in, his grin widening. “but you still like me, right?”

you couldn’t deny it, no matter how flustered you felt. despite his eccentricities, his arrogance, and his occasional cluelessness, you had fallen for him. somewhere along the way, in between sharing snacks and solving cases, you’d developed real feelings for ranpo edogawa.

with a sigh, you gave in. “yeah, i do.” his face lit up, triumphant. without hesitation, he leaned forward again, pressing a quick kiss to your other cheek. “good. then it’s settled. we’re officially dating now. no more misunderstandings.”

you laughed, a mix of exasperation and affection filling your chest. leave it to ranpo to turn something as complicated as confessing feelings into a matter-of-fact conclusion.

as you sat there, cheeks still warm from his kisses, you realized that maybe this was how it was meant to be. nothing about ranpo was typical, so why would your relationship be any different?

“fine,” you said, shaking your head with a smile. “but next time, *ask* before kissing me.”

he gave you a playful wink. “no promises.”

again, thank you for requesting and thank you for reading! you guys are so sweet :,>

[rarastmblr]

“Minamoto Teru”

The Perfect Boy — Minamoto Teru

He's smart. Always perfect and answering correctly in academics.

Tests? Perfect. Quizzes? Perfect. Recitation? Perfect.

You can't help but be so grateful when he helps you out and tutors you in subjects that you're having a hard time with.

He's handsome, attractive. No wonder he has so many fans. I mean, who could resist such a handsome face?

His hair; Every strand was so soft to the touch that it felt like a gentle caress. You couldn't take your eyes off it and feel nothing but adoration for the golden hue that filled your vision.

The blonde tresses captivated your soul and forever imprinted itself inside your heart.

His eyes; The blue eyes sparkled like pools of sapphire, reflecting the sun in all of its brilliance. Every time you looked at them, there was a feeling of admiration and profound joy that you couldn't quite explain.

He is invested in his interests and engaging in conversation with him allows one to appreciate his positive outlook on life.

He takes action to bring his goals and dreams to fruition, and is resilient and self-sufficient in the face of adversity and challenge.

He has the poise and class to graciously accept every experience. He is encouraging and motivating of the people he loves and engages with.

He's kind. Some think that he's cruel when he rejects the confessions of the girls who have a crush on him.

But he isn't, not at all. He's not cruel, just straightforward but in a way you'll understand and not hate him for it. He'll apologize and then reject you.

He is caring, tender. He is honest about his feelings and empathizes with the struggles of his friends.

There's a reason to why you love Minamoto Teru but you can't seem to answer such a question when you are actually asked why.

It's because you can't pick which of the many things that Minamoto Teru has that makes you love him so much.

You watch him as he reads the contents of your love letter about your love for him.

As he finishes reading, he gives you a smile. You can't tell whether it's a smile of pity or if it's a sign that he accepts your love.

“I'm sorry—”

The first two words were enough for you to know what his response was.

That had happened years ago, if your memory was correct, maybe when you guys were still first years.

Ever since the confession, you guys have grown distant. From the occasional greetings in the halls to only pass by each other without making any eye contact.

You admit the sudden distance between your relationship was your fault. A day after the confession you were the one who would hide away from him out of embarrassment because you got rejected.

You avoided him like a plague.

Even when your classmates had told you that Teru was looking for you because he wanted to catch up with you and other things, you wouldn't go.

Even if it was Minamoto Teru himself who would walk towards you and try his best to start a conversation, you'd somehow be able to slip away from him.

Now, in second year, Minamoto Teru is still the perfect boy that you always admired ever since you guys first met.

I think back to when we were so close and I would wonder. What would have happened to us if the confession never happened. Would we have been more closer than we already were?

As the both of you pass by each other, a pair of blue eyes look back at the back of your figure. Once? No. Twice.

Unfortunately, you took no notice of the longing gaze.

A/n: This isn't really a long fic, I'm so sorry 🥹. I'm just adding plot to the reader and Teru's relationship. Man I'm a sucker for when the relationship has something like a distance and the guy is the one who is desperate to mend the relationship together again. Also I think I didn't really mention supernaturals/apparitions here 🫣 woopsy.

[nanamissuit]

Hello hello perhaps!!!

141 gang (or whoever you’d like) with a gender neutral reader who owns a motorcycle.

And not only that, but they are low key a pretty cool and pretty silly motorcycle rider. Who wears their helmet all the time like it’s their face

🏍️ 💨💨

Like if you’ve seen little videos like these https://www.instagram.com/reel/CytvzeMvcH9/?igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==

https://www.instagram.com/reel/CvKx0u5pSme/?igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==

https://www.instagram.com/reel/CuePZmJuw6p/?igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==

And let me say, they are just this silly and outrageously confident cause their helmet grants them this anonymity to keep their identity a secret. And tucking away their social anxiety cause NOBODy knows who’s under there 😌😌😌

Motorcycles - 141

pairing: 141 x fem! reader SFW

warnings: none, just pure fluff

John 'Soap' MacTavish:

When he first met you, you were wearing a bunny helmet and doing wheelies on the highway and at the next red light he stopped with you and got your instagram.

Definitely notices how you don’t ever show your face at ALL under any circumstances which makes him more intrigued with you

He messaged you as soon as he got home and scheduled for you guys to go riding the next night and he got your # and address (Score for him:p)

He notices that even when you’ve known him for at least 4 months you never showed him your face and maybe it's because of the stunts you do publicly.

Like that one time you fell off your bike while stopped and he had to help you off the ground

Or the time you started singing extremely loudly with people in there cars

But he loves that you’re not afraid to be yourself, at least with your helmet on

And then finally one day while he went to come pick you up he asked to see your face, after 20 minutes you finally caved and took off your helmet for him

Jaw. DROPPED.

He always knew you were pretty but when he saw you for real, he could have sworn he fell in love right there.

“Wow-I mean uhm wow-I mean uhm shit.” He was struggling to find words about how pretty you were but just know after a month or two he asked you out and now he can compliment you all the time.

Kyle 'Gaz' Garrick:

Now He met you when you went to a car show and showed up on your very cute pink motorcycle that complimented your pink helmet. He came over to you and he made small talk with you until he got your number

When he went home he noticed you actually texted him first, he IMMEDIATELY replied.

“Hey! It’s ____ from the car meet <3 just felt like texting you!! It was really nice meeting you tonight.”

“Hey, it was nice meeting you as well. We should definitely go riding sometime.”

“Oh definitely just let me know a time and place!!:)”

Kyle wouldn’t show it directly of course but he was so excited. As soon as he told you to meet him at a local parking lot he was so excited to see you pull up

When you pulled up in front of him he took off his helmet expecting you to do the same but when you didn’t he looked at you confused as you tilted your head

“You don’t take your helmet off huh?” He said softly to you and you just nodded your head as he put on his helmet and invited you to follow him as you rode all night

Eventually the night came to an end and he drove back with you to your place as you parked your bike you said something you’d probably later regret.

“Wanna stay the night..? Youdonthavetoifyoudontwann-" “Alright Alright calm down love of course I wanna spend the night.”

And that’s exactly when he saw your beautiful face.

He looked at you for 10 minutes not saying a word as he admired you 

And to this day while you're laying on his chest 4 months later, he still thinks about that night.

Simon 'Ghost" Riley:

Now the way you two met was at a bar, when he pulled up not on a bike, but a car instead.

He hit on you so fast he got your number in 5 minutes tops.

Now in my mind I think after about 2-6 months you guys became official and he started just spending every night at your house no matter if you went out or not on your bike

But what he didn’t tell you is that he KNEW how to drive a motorcycle matter a fact he had one for about 6 years before selling it 

He always tells you he worries about your safety on your bike but you reassure him you’ll be fine but one particular night you said something you’d later find out to be false 

“You’ve never even driven a motorcycle, what do you know silly?”

“Oh? Is that what you think lovie?”

And then he opened the door to the garage and hopped on your bike as he started it and looked at you as he put on one of your spare black helmets

“You just gonna sit there n stare or ya gonna hop on?”

You then quickly hopped on the back wrapping your arms around his broad body

He then backed out of the driveway and sped down many many roads.

“OH MY GOD SIMON JESUS CHRIST-SLOW DOWN!!!”

“JUST HANG ON WE’LL BE FINE.”

And then he brought you to an abandoned little parking garage as he parked the bike all the way at the top for a nice view

“I had a bike for…I wanna say 6 years. I know how to drive a bike lovie s’not that hard.”

You were absolutely shell shocked

“You never told me!! Why?”

“Wasn’t important to me.”

And then from there on out you were his backpack most nights.

'Captain' John Price:

Now you and price have known each other for about 6 months he’s seen your face and he like ghost spends most nights at your house

Only difference is he knows how to ride a bike and told you prior to him driving you on your bike

He has a truck but had a bike for about 8 years prior to his truck

He ended up buying another bike just so he could ride with you on some nights.

He loved watching you do your little silly activities like wheelies and when you stopped at red lights and little kids would admire your bike and you would fist bump them his heart would melt

Now because he's a male biker I like to believe he’s had his fair share of girls hitting on them

Usually they back off when you pull up next to him

But sometimes they don’t get the message so if they don’t he’ll say something

“Already married.” “I’ve got a wife.” “That's my wife next to me.”

And the best part is you’re not married he just likes to call you his wife because it makes you all giddy.

Now when you do backpack him he tries to go slow for you but if you tell him to speed up he will 

He lets you basically control the speed and he loves when you’re his backpack regardless of the speed.

THIS TOOK SO LONG BUT SO WORTH IT AHHHHH!! I loved writing this :p.

[top-vi]

the contrast of rhaenyra's and alicent's experiences with motherhood is so fascinating

I’ve always argued the storyline of being wary of motherhood and childbirth would’ve worked better with Alicent than Rhaenyra.

Alicent doesn’t get to choose who the father of her children is, she doesn’t have access to contraceptives nor can she refuse Viserys when he calls for her.

The themes of forced motherhood and the consequences of this would work so much better with women like Alicent: struggling to love children forced on you, not understanding why you’re not overcome with maternal affection, suffering from undiagnosed postpartum depression etc.

With Rhaenyra it just doesn’t work because unlike Alicent she can choose her children’s father and she can decide when she wants to be pregnant. In the books she has three back to back pregnancies and then stops for 4 years, whilst in the show she has Joffrey eight years after Luke which means she intentionally had a third child. Either way it all comes down to Rhaenyra having bodily autonomy; if she didn’t want to be pregnant she wouldn’t be pregnant.

Also having Rhaenyra be the one who expresses her wish to not have children honestly feels more sexist because the writers are implying not wanting to be a mother isn’t normal, so once Rhaenyra gives birth to Jace she realises the error of her ways and happily has five more. This implication doesn’t sit well with me.

so i wasn’t fair to you anon, and i’ve let this sit in my inbox since may. the reason for this is because i wanted to see how alicent and rhaenyra’s relationships to their children were developed, explained, and expanded on in season two.

regarding alicent and her children:

i think we officially got your wish anon (mine too). while some people may be unhappy with her arc in season 2, alicent has always had a deep-seated love-hate relationship with her children. i’d argue that in season one we also got glimpses into the just…visceral revulsion that she cannot shake when she looks at her children, aegon in particular. but in season two i think she’s truly confronted, in a noticeable tangible way, with the facts of her sons.

obviously, i wish we’d been able to see more of this kind of dynamic back in season one, especially with a younger alicent. however, there are season constraints and we can only see so much in ten episodes (side note: 8-10 episode seasons with a two year wait in between is a rant for another time, but know i’m not being like “yay season constraints!”).

the problem with alicent’s arc and struggle is that so fucking much of it is internal. it is so incredibly hard to show on screen and i find the way its been done so far admirable. up until luke’s death, alicent is lying to herself over and over every day about her relationship to her children, aemond and aegon particularly. once the war starts i believe the tower of lies she’s told herself (this is morally correct, i’m just doing my duty, i was treated well, i’m protecting my children like any mother should) start to crumble. i hate so much that we never got her reaction to aemond killing luke for this reason.

also, to a certain extent she may not ever truly come to grips with her trauma. there are no words for what she went through—marital rape was not a concept then. it still manifests, obviously, but i think we can tell with her repeated insistence that viserys was a decent husband and man [loud incorrect buzzer] that she still thinks she’s the one who’s done something wrong. i’ll be interested to see if the writers ever actually have alicent come to grips with the fact that viserys was, in fact, not a good person or king. personally, i don’t believe they will, but we can always hope.

anyways, all this is to say that: i do believe the themes of forced motherhood and its lifelong consequences are well done and explored with alicent (thus far). people will disagree, perhaps even you, but her eventual rejection of aegon and aemond; her desperate, almost chaotic protection of helaena; her ideas about daeron; all of it really speaks to the struggle she’s had and is going through as their mother.

regarding rhaenyra and her children:

this is more difficult that alicent lol

before i get into my gripes with her story, i do want to push back just a little bit on the idea that rhaenyra truly has bodily autonomy. regardless of when or with whom she gets pregnant, she’s still expected to get pregnant and have children. while its unfortunately not explored, she does need to produce heirs.

now. i agree with you for the most part. rhaenyra’s relationships to her children really make no sense. the only one that’s fleshed out is jace, and while that is interesting in the “she’s doing to him exactly what viserys did to her,” it is not complex internally (in the same way alicent’s is). i also personally see joffery as an oops baby, but who really knows. i don’t even know how to explain her children with daemon. they were plot necessary i guess lmfao

the problem with rhaenyra and her children is that almost all of the critical moments in their relationships happen off screen during the time jump. its a structural tv show problem and it brings up these kinds of issues when looking deeper into the relationships she would actually have. i think the writers did a good job this season of making the internal conflict and intrapersonal strife within team black better, but this is just one of those things thats never going to be explored. in this sense we’ll never really know her true feelings or the development that could’ve happened—which is a massive shame.

my personal headcanon (so take with a grain of salt and don’t come for me), is that rhaenyra isn’t against the idea of children as a teenager, she’s against the childbirth. i believe this both because of the horrors of watching her mother’s repeated miscarriages and eventual death while in childbirth, and her consistent refrain of the desire to be a man. i think she wants, to her core, freedom and, as a woman, having a child requires much more sacrifice than having a child as a man.

i don’t personally see the change from not wanting children to totally wanting children as misogynistic, but i don’t blame you for seeing it that way because of the utter lack of canon explanation for it. again, i wasn’t really fair to you keeping this until season two was finished, but i think both alicent and rhaenyra’s relationships to motherhood were developed well.

[shelaghdette]

headcanon with evidence: shelagh turner is autistic/neurodivergent!

intense interests: shelagh's special interest is obviously the science of midwifery. she's only 30 years old at the beginning of the series, but already her expertise is virtually on par with the older nuns. her deep knowledge is very well respected by her patients and colleagues. she also LOVES to talk about it, you can see her face light up every time she has a chance.

hyperfocus: when shelagh is completely absorbed in a task, she struggles to notice anything else around her. for example, in the very first episode, she doesn't even notice jenny is in the room when she comes to inform sister julienne about her latest delivery. when sister julienne introduces her to jenny, she only very briefly acknowledges her, and then goes back to talking about work, which ties into -

struggling with social cues: in scenes with lots of shelagh dialogue, notice how she struggles to make prolonged eye contact. a notable exception is sister julienne and, later, patrick, but this makes sense. a lot of autistic people struggle to make eye contact generally, but have a few "safe people" with whom it's a lot easier. shelagh also struggles with boundaries, indicated by her lack of ability to ask for help when she needs it or say no when she's asked to do something. she can also be very blunt and forthright about her opinions, such as when she tells jenny to "please stop wittering on about vegetables, i could not care less." she wasn't trying to be rude, she was just indicating her disinterest in the subject in a very to-the-point way. also, when she was infodumping about the bri-nylon nightie, and CLEARLY misunderstanding cues that patrick thought she was extremely sexy in that little get-up 😳😏

stimming: shelagh is CONSTANTLY stimming. most notable are her hand movements, she fidgets with her hands a lot, and when she sits at a table, she often keeps her hands below the surface. i believe this is so she can subtly stim without attracting attention. oh, and you know the autistic stereotype of velociraptor arms? well, i give you...

masking: she's a social chameleon. her speech mannerisms were much more formal and clipped while she was still in the religious life, because she was holding herself to a certain standard, even though it's not necessarily required (look at sister evangelina). i think she was trying to model her behaviour and mannerisms on sister julienne, which is SO COMMON for autistic women to copy the behaviour of someone they admire in order to blend. she also "mirrors" body language, seen here. (both have their hands in their pockets, their legs are the same width apart. also peep my babygirl not making eye contact AGAIN while he's directly looking at her face!)

exaggerated facial expressions and emotive tone of voice: it's a common misconception that autistic people always have monotonous voices and flat facial affect. some do, but just as many are the complete opposite and actually have really varied expressions and tones. ctm fans who don't like shelagh tend to point this fact out about her, but to me it just makes her relatable, because i'm a really emotive autistic person too!

also, this is just anecdotal, but all of my autistic friends who watch ctm agree with me that shelagh is most likely autistic. and we're really good at identifying autistic traits in others.

these are just my observations from watching the show, as an autistic person. if you don't share these views, that's fine! but please be mindful of what you say if you aren't neurodivergent ♡

[chuusposts]

the reason i live is to die with you

summary: xiao, kazuha, albedo, aether with a suicidal! reader (aka dazai)

warnings: minor angst(?), mention of suicide, double suicide, suicide thoughts, suicide attempts (everything that's related to suicide)

notes: i tried writing for genshin hehe (also if you don't know who dazai is, he's an anime character (and a real person) who has attempted suicide for many times but also failed each time) part 02 :')

xiao

the first time he met you was when you tried to jump off the wangshu inn balcony. he heard you say something like "the weather is so clear, do you think this world is going to fall apart?" and he was like '???'

when you noticed his presence, you asked him the same question and if he'd like to be your suicide partner, "it feels so lonely to leave this world by myself, so how about you join me instead?" while giving him the most idiotic smile.

when he refused, you immediately pout and started to climb up the rail obviously trying to jump off. but your suicide attempt failed when xiao teleported behind you and held your wrist "what the hell do you think you're doing?!"

he's even more confused when you grimaced and sent him a sharp glare.

later after he got close to you (after he tried to stop your suicide attempt a few times) he learned that attempting for a suicide is your second nature so the next time you ask him for a double suicide he would just shrug it off.

but sometimes he does get worried like what if one day he comes back to you just to find out you're not in this world anymore? he already lost his friends, no way he's gonna lose you next. so he always make sure to check on you from time to time especially if you're out of his sight for too long just to make sure you're safe.

kazuha

kazuha was at ritou's dock admiring the beauty of narukami island before he departed to liyue in a few hours. but you just had to come up to him and asked him, "kazuha, how long do you think it will take for you to find my body if i drown in the sea?"

he was shocked at first but after he realised it was you, he just laughed it off and smiled, "well, i prefer if you don't drown at all"

you smiled at his words, "then you must wanted to die alongside with me, right?" he then cupped your cheeks with his hands, "dear y/n, why do you wish to die?"

"let me ask you, then. do you really think there's any value in the act of living? i've been living my entire life, and i still can't find a reason for me to live."

kazuha was speechless, he already asked himself the same question many times. does he simply live because of what happened to his friend? because his friend left him prematurely without that of a goodbye? and he figured, the problem is that he loved him. he loved all of his friends so much he's afraid if he leaves this world, other people will feel the exact same way as he did and it pained his heart just thinking about it.

that's why in that instant, kazuha swears to himself; that he'll protect you until you find your reason to live. in this world, and the next, he'll always protect you.

albedo

it was still dark when albedo arrived at his lab in dragonspine. what he didn't expect was to be met with a panicked sucrose, "mr. albedo, please help us!" she said, pointing at you who looked like you were on cloud nine.

as he made his way to you, albedo realized that you're actually... high? really? early in the morning? "just look, i've finally arrived in the afterlife! to the land of the dead, khaenri'ah!" you laughed hysterically.

albedo was confused, "sucrose, what's going on?" sucrose looked around a bit before picking a half eaten mushroom and a book titled 'complete guide to suicide'. she read and explained to albedo about the method you were using when you suddenly jumped on her, still high.

albedo sighed, seemingly used to your antics, "wait a minute sucrose, let me finish my paperwork first." sucrose was struggling so much, she even tried to fight you off but you still succeeded wrapping her full body and face with crape bandages making her look like a mummy.

you came to sit in front of him, poking and pinching his cheeks, begging him to come with you to the afterlife while he focused on his paperworks.

after it what felt like a good five minutes, albedo put his pen down, cupped your cheeks in his hand and stared straight into your eyes, "strange, most people fear death but at the same time they are drawn to death. yet why are you so different from them? maybe i should spend more time with you so i can learn about you..."

aether

"you're a man as ephemeral and elegant as a lotus blossom. would you be willing to join me in a double suicide-"

'bbong!' you were proposing aether for a double suicide when paimon suddenly hit you in the head causing you two to bickered.

"at least wait for him to find his sibling first!" paimon shouted. she's not wrong; you should've at least waited for him to reunite with lumine first before you died with him, "but that would take forever!" after all, all you wanted to do was to leave this world as soon as possible.

that's why you offered to accompany him throughout his journey. aether was glad, not because you wanted to commit double suicide with him but because he can always keep his eyes on you.

moreover, he doesn't have to worry about you committing double suicide with other people. though he must admit that he's a bit jealous when you suddenly ask random people to join for your double suicide especially if they're good looking (you're loyal to him so obviously you were joking)

one day, you were explaining to him why living is so useless and why he should join you for your double suicide saying your reason to live is to die with him. aether listened to you attentively when he suddenly sighed and smiled softly, "but y/n, if you think of me as your reason to live, then i'll take it upon myself to keep you alive."

[niku30]

( SC credit to @randomstoreroom21c )

SHANG TSUNG HCs

I once again can’t stop thinking about MK1 Shang Tsung and his personal life and relationships /struggles / past / so have these rambles, keep im mind that most of these are HCs we came up with for our AU but I think they might generally apply as I just love them so much.

• To most of his allies Shang Tsung is respectable and influential enough to be a collaborator but too alienating and too much of a pathological liar to be a friend or even a partner as soon as they find out what experiments he conducts. This frustrates Shang Tsung because he desperately longs to experience the feeling of being admired. It’s kind of twisted though, because he is entirely unwilling to change his ways even towards other evil-spirited figures and still hopes that someone will love him for what he does as there’s a sense of “look at my power and my deceptive nature and how I simply do not care, isn’t that an attractive quality in and of itself?” He almost expects people to want him for it but it doesn’t occur in his mind that no matter if good or evil people consider working with him his ways will always make him untrustworthy.

• think when he was younger he tried to make genuine connections but usually ended up being discarded or he severed said connections himself because of his deceptive nature - so it never really got anywhere and eventually he turned spiteful without acknowledging that he was often the issue rather than others. It definitely got chaotic and he probably didn’t shy away from manipulating people into desiring him but deep inside he always knew that fake love and fake bonds wouldn’t bring him the satisfaction that he desires. It was always just a means to survival in the end so loyalty of any sort towards him was always forced rather than earned. He so badly wants to mean something to someone but in the end his actions drive everyone away and closer bonds are hardly ever considered. It’s basically an endless cycle he cannot seem to get out of.

• He does not mind having few friends especially due to a past of mutual backstabbings and untrustworthy alliances but he clearly does mind not having admirers as there is a sense of envy over Liu Kang’s power and the admiration he deserves because of his modesty. He was visibly taken aback after finding out that somewhere in other timelines there were versions of him who had actual influence and he asks himself why he was the one deemed “lesser” than his doppelgangers.

• Convincing Bi-Han, the literal grandmaster of the Lin Kuei, probably felt like one of the biggest successes to date for him. He was able to successfully use his schemes to tempt a powerful man into betraying his own family and join forces and it would only make his god complex grow. However he is probably a man who is hardly satisfied whatsoever so the fact that Kuai Liang and Smoke did NOT join would frustrate him to no end - especially because these fighters genuinely appeal to him and he had hoped for things to develop which might seem like a completely delusional desire to outsiders - again this comes from the deep underlying despair of wanting to be noticed and acknowledged but no one ever engages in such a way. He often seeks more in alliances than his partners and therefore he never quite feels fulfilled.

[skelliko]

hello everything is fine? I wanted to make a different request, could I make them discovering that y/n has narcissistic personality disorder? thanks!

hii I'm all good :)

sorry if it took a while to write it, I wanted to get the right Information about the disorder and thinking about how they'd react or do was kinda hard. though for clarification i was unsure half of the time on how to write about the disorder since I knew nothing so I'm sorry if there's parts that aren't true.

tbh I contemplated not doing this 1 purely cause I didn't want to offend anyone, if needed to or if anyone asks I will delete this post.

(by the way Im not saying that people with that disorder can never be loved, it can just be a little difficult)

★- Tokyo revengers

featuring: kazutora, chifuyu, Baji

°- Kazutora hanemiya

• he'd hate the lack of emotion and sympathy you'd give him sometimes but would brush it off since he knows he also gets like that

• though sometimes he'd be okay with it, if he's talking about something touchy about him he doesn't want an over-reaction to it. but he still craves that sense of care from you

• would bicker about who's fault is who's, "it's your fault"- "no it's yours!"

• he'd take notice of your self worth and admire you a little for that

• he'd notice your need for attention but then would get confused if you seem to not show much reaction towards it

• he'd hug and keep you company, and give you compliments

• he wouldn't notice at first but once he got the gist of your whole self and analysed you he then soon enough become sceptical of your disorder

• he'd pity you but not say anything of it yet

• if he realises that he's unintentionally made you jealous or envy someone cause he gave his attention to someone else when around you he'd panic a little

• though deep down he likes you jealous cause it shows you still have care of him

• he'd try and show you his care that even despite your disorder he still cares very much about you

• he aware that he has his own problems, sure he's not aware all the time but despite you not showing much emotion or sympathy you still picked him, and he picked you

• he knows that disorders and behaviours like that are sometimes caused by trauma or a type of upbringing, he fully understands that. so he tried to make you open up a little to him but slyly asking you a few minor questions

• whenever he notices you trying to help him or someone else kazutora can't seem to find it amusing since he can tell that whatever your saying won't be helpful

• he'd out of the blue ask you things about your disorder, not even saying that he knows beforehand

• "how do you feel in certain situations? is it actually all plain and numb or is there more to it?"

• in the end you're both considered to be red flags, it just so happens that you both can also understand each other. but if one gets a little out of control you will be separated

°- chifuyu matsuno

• he'd be confused and even a little hurt by your behaviour

• he noticed your struggle and lack of desire to apologize, but he wouldn't hate you for that, he gets that apologizing can sometimes be embarrassing

• but if it's over something major and notices your half-assed apology he'd confront you about that

• he'd get hurt by the lack of sympathy you'd give and when you do show a bit of it he's sceptical of it being fake

• sometimes he'd feel useless in the relationship

• he'd quietly and calmly watch as you fix your hair or do something about your appearance before coming up to you from behind and tell you "you're always pretty"

• he'd realise your need for attention and would shower you with compliments throughout the day without thinking much of it, he actually kind of likes that

• "I like your hair" "that colour suits you" "your amazing at what you do"

• he'd be a bit slow in noticing that sort of thing but once he finally realised and sticks together all the signs of your disorder he seems a little stuck in his mind about it all, cause he knows it always ends up toxic in the end.

• but he also wants to show you that he can still care for you

• he purposely did research about your disorder in hopes of understanding you a lot better

• he'd try to be caring and gentle but it'd wears him out sometimes and even puts pressure himself on

• he didn't want to be an dick and abandon you cause of your issues but he finds it difficult to contain, it's easier to let go than keep it up and have constant worry that he's not doing anything right

°- Baji Keisuke

• there'd be a bit of arguing and he knows that neither of you would back down so Baji always tried to back down first and avoid any arguing or disagreement

• he can be understanding when he first realised that you try so hard to impress others, he'd come up to you about it and reassure that you're already perfect for him

• he'd give you the needed attention that you crave

• he has his boundaries straight and would tell you if you do something that he doesn't like

• on the outside he plays along with your self confidence and agrees but deep down hes holding his tongue back

• it wasn't until the middle of your relationship that he connected the dots to your disorder

• he didn't say anything about It but in his mind he was thinking hard about the relationship between the two of you and the change that had happened half way

• how long would he let it keep up before it started to become toxic?

• whenever your hanging out in a group he'd give you attention by holding your hand or an arm over your shoulders, or if your sat down he'd rest his hand on your thigh

• he's patient with you on the outside but on the inside he isn't

• he'd start to confront you about certain things a lot more but in a calm manner in hopes of that helping you a little but would sometimes get agitated by your lack of care

• despite knowing and experiencing your narcissism he will try to stay with you and make it work but if things start going to the left he'd leave immediately without a doubt

 ♡---

[dufferpuffer]

Tbh, I actually think Ginny is a bit…thuggish, for want of a better word. More than a bit prone to physical violence as humour in a way I think Snape would find repulsive on account of his background. Snape would like her more than Percy (because he’ll see himself in Percy’s thirst to prove himself leading to poor choices and naturally hate him for it). But I think it’s quite likely she would be fairly far down his personal ranking of Weasleys, certainly before that final year. Arthur and Molly I do think he likes.

Late answer I'm so sorry but I think about this so much

Because you have good points, and it's helped me clarify how I think about them so thankyou <3... but I'm still torn.

She IS sporty, thuggish, 'Boorish' even - raised with a bunch of rowdy boys and has a lot to prove... while I don't think she was a bully, she still called Luna 'Loony' at first, and that's a bad look - though she fought more FOR people than against them... ... But that's all a bit like Lily, isn't it?

Firey redhead girl with a lot to prove, talented and doesn't let anyone talk down to her, a bit of a rough, teasing edge to her kindness, effortlessly popular... but also, eventually, more kind to 'outcasts'.

I'm not saying anyone who looks or acts vaguely similar to Lily is going to get Severus acting weird. He's traumatized and childish but he's still a grown man, not a lovesick moron. But I've been thinking about this a lot... and I find it hard to believe it wouldn't be a negative for him, even if only subconsciously.

Ultimately Ginny is not Lily and he isn't thinking of them as similar. But a fiery young redhead girl brewing potions in his class, snickering quietly with a friend about someone else - I think it'd rub him the wrong way, even if the memories he has are positive. Repulsive, as you said. How couldn't he find being reminded of his own childhood in the middle of teaching uncomfortable...?

At first - Severus would have been really HARD on Ginny. Like he is subconsciously daring her, testing her. Takes points for small things, snaps at her to pay attention - treats her like he treats Harry. He probably doesn't even really notice. Finds it annoying 'the Weasley girl is always vying for attention, no doubt spoiled by her mother and overshadowed by her brothers...' He thinks he has her all worked out. But he doesn't. He is wrong.

Well, he isn't entirely wrong - but he is missing the key point that she ISN'T vying for attention at all. HE can't ignore HER. Like Harry.

I think he bullied her. Like he bullies Harry, though less (too busy hounding Harry) - but still can't help himself from making uncalled for quips, or getting annoyed at some innocent-enough activity and taking points for no reason. I doubt she notices too much. Ron and Harry primed her, she thinks its normal Snape behaviour... but he doesn't do that to other kids.

But as she gets older... especially that final year... there's more for him to admire in her than not. She's more of a leader, strong, crafty, sneaky, cunning - she's helped Longbottom pull himself together and she openly is friends with outcasts like Luna. As a far more distant hand, as Headmaster, having her be a ''foil''... I think he really came to respect her. Like her. Rely on her, even.

It's a shame - if he could have worked with her I have no doubt they'd be friends. He grew himself around Lily, and Ginny is a similar shape.

~~~

Overall, I think Severus kept a working-relationship distance from Molly and Arthur. But I struggle to see him really getting along with Molly. She gets intense about things he would disagree with, she is bossy, she is overly emotional - and not afraid to snap bitingly at people.

I think he avoids starting shit with her, it's not worth it, but it's hard not to let an eye roll and a '...And you think that would be beneficial?' when she says something he disagrees with. If she gets haughty and snappy at him, likely bringing up what her children have told her about his classes and his manner and not shying away from picking at his looks - he could snap back just as hard.

I don't think they were a problem in meetings. They don't WANT to bicker. But I think that resulted in not speaking unless it was basic "Two sugars, please - thankyou, Professor." and "Yes, your daughter is doing fine - though needs to focus more on her homework."

Arthur is a character fandom often glosses over. Molly's 'crimes' are put on his head and his eccentricities are blown out of proportion. He is very much Molly's 'keeper' and anchor, he is kind but not a pushover, he is responsible, he can be stiff-lipped when he needs to be and playful when he doesn't... While not friends, Severus would appreciate him. Think he was a good egg, doing good work to a high standard... even if, perhaps, he shouldn't be so reckless with his belongings.

[lynlyndoll]

IDOL LIFE - crazy people + lia

genre: smau, fluff, idol au, possible smut hints but i don't think it will be something very detailed (?), angst maybe (sad things WILL happen.)

pairing: idol! han x æspa 5th member! reader

appearances and specifications: ok, so it will be the whole skz, the whole æspa, as for the bestie group that y/n has: yuqi from (g)i-dle, lia and yuna from itzy, minji from newjeans. also, felix is childhood besties w y/n (I HAVE AN UNHEALTHY OBSESSION WITH BEING BESTIES W FELIX IDK). In this au, I invented a new award show, called Korean Music Award, (shortly KMA) so I won't interfere with any other award show that has amazing MCs. Also, this is my first time doing a smau (smile through the pain and struggle 😔) so yall, please be kind😞.

synopsis: Since you have debuted, you have made lots of friends from different groups that you admired. And one group you admired was your bestfriend's group, Stray Kids. Since they debuted, you have been a devotated stan, always buying their merch and albums, always watching their lives, videos and m/vs. However, you haven't had the right time to actually meet everyone face to face, being incredibly occupied with your own group's activities. As you were already a group for over 1 year, you have been selected for being an MC for KMA. What happens though, when you see that you have to MC with one of your biggest idols?

yuqi (yuqisacutie)

-> group: (G)I-DLE

-> loves y/n so much, literally her bigger sister

-> met y/n while they were still trainees. they were in a store and she heard some humming coming from a girl with big headphones on her head, which was y/n. y/n noticed her and she smiled to yuqi. they met a few more times in the store and then they started talking

-> the groupchat's funniest person

-> people may think she is serious sometimes, but she is actually joking

lia (julyia)

-> group: ITZY

-> sweetest person in the groupchat

-> people say she is the sane one out of them

-> she isn't. but she does take the mother role in the group since she feels the most responsible there

-> she is right about that.

-> met y/n through yuna, actually

-> then she joined the group

yuna (richbitchyuna)

-> group: ITZY

-> y/n's #1 bully, but she is actually her bestfriend since they met

-> y/n met yuna when both of their classes at school were over and they bumped into each other. y/n recognized yuna immediately and before apologizing, yuna said it wasn't a big deal and in order to "pay" for her mistake, y/n should take her to the café next to the school

-> that's what they did and found out they have a lot of things in common.

-> yuna tried to make a quick arrangement once, when she found out y/n's bias is han, but y/n found out sooner then she should and yuna's plan failed

minji (wassupminji)

-> group: NEWJEANS

-> has 4 kids, but isn't really invested, she treats them more like sisters

-> there isn't someone who is more random than minji, she could say the most random stuff with the straightest face EVER.

-> met y/n during MAMA awards, she thought æspa's performance was amazing, so she went in their cabin and talked with the members

-> friendship at first sight between her and y/n, but she is also friends with ningning

taglist!!

(to be added, just write a comment)

@agi-ppangx @lisaaassophhhieee @hyunjin-lover20 @chrizzlaptop @ilychee08 @ylixbok

[diavolo-is-babygirl]

Diavolo & Mammon Fic: Happy Birthday Diavolo!

—————-

Mammon had spent weeks planning Diavolo’s birthday present. It had to be perfect, a gift that would stand out, that would show Diavolo just how much he was appreciated—something unforgettable. He might have gone overboard with it, but for Diavolo? Nothing was too much.

So when the big day finally came, Mammon pulled Diavolo aside after all the formal festivities, away from the crowds and the clamor of celebration, and led him to a quiet courtyard lit only by the soft glow of string lights. In the center of it stood the gift: a sleek, limited-edition motorcycle with black and gold details, glinting under the lights. Alongside it was a custom leather jacket embroidered with Diavolo’s crest, as well as a helmet with intricate gold designs matching the bike. The setup was nothing short of regal.

Diavolo’s eyes went wide when he saw it, his mouth slightly open as he struggled for words. “Mammon… this is…” he began, his voice catching in his throat.

“Yeah, yeah, I know! It’s awesome, right?” Mammon grinned, practically bouncing on his heels. “Figured a guy like you deserves somethin’ with style, something big! Thought maybe we could take a ride sometime, just the two of us, y’know?”

Diavolo’s gaze softened as he looked at Mammon, but as he reached out to touch the bike, his hand faltered, and Mammon noticed the faint tremor in his fingers. He was about to brush it off, but then Diavolo’s shoulders started to shake, and he drew in a shallow, unsteady breath.

“I… I don’t deserve this,” Diavolo whispered, his voice barely audible. His fingers curled back, pulling away from the gift as if he were afraid to touch it. “I can’t even live up to half of what everyone expects of me. I’ve been failing, making mistake after mistake, and you’re here giving me something so… so grand, as if I’m actually worthy of it.”

Mammon’s heart clenched as Diavolo’s hand went to his chest, his breathing becoming ragged, eyes unfocused and full of pain. Without thinking, Mammon stepped forward, wrapping his arms around Diavolo and pulling him close. Diavolo tensed for a moment, as if caught off guard, but Mammon held firm, refusing to let him pull away.

“Hey… hey, listen to me, alright?” Mammon said softly, his usual brashness melting away. “Ya don’t have to be perfect, Diavolo. Ya don’t have to carry all that by yourself. You’ve got people around ya for a reason. It ain’t all on you.”

Diavolo’s breaths were still shallow, his heart racing as he clung to Mammon’s jacket, as if grounding himself in the touch. “I feel like… I can’t show weakness. Not as the future king. I’m supposed to be everything they need, everything the Devildom needs. But sometimes… I just don’t know if I’m enough.”

Mammon shook his head, his voice gentle yet firm. “Ya know what I see when I look at you? I see someone who’s given everything he’s got to make life better for others. I see someone who worries more ‘bout his people than he does ‘bout himself. And yeah, ya might screw up sometimes. But that’s what makes ya worth admiring, Diavolo. Ya don’t give up, no matter how tough it gets.”

Diavolo looked up, his gaze meeting Mammon’s, his eyes bright with unshed tears. “Mammon, I… thank you. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

Mammon felt his own cheeks warm, but he kept his expression steady, squeezing Diavolo’s shoulder reassuringly. “Hey, that’s what I’m here for, right? You’re always there for everyone else, so let me be here for ya.”

Slowly, Diavolo’s breathing steadied, and his grip on Mammon relaxed. He took a deep breath, letting the last of the tension slip away, his hands still resting lightly on Mammon’s shoulders. “I don’t say it enough, but… you mean so much to me, Mammon. More than I can put into words.”

Mammon grinned, nudging him playfully. “Yeah, yeah, don’t get all sappy on me now, alright? Just… promise me you’ll remember this. When things get rough, when ya feel like ya can’t handle it, ya come to me. We’ll get through it together, ‘cause I ain’t lettin’ ya face it alone.”

A small smile broke through Diavolo’s troubled expression, and he nodded. “I promise.”

And as they stood there, the courtyard quiet around them, Diavolo finally allowed himself to reach out, running his fingers along the motorcycle’s polished surface. The weight of the crown felt a little lighter that night, and as long as he had Mammon by his side, he knew he could keep moving forward—one step at a time.

[daniellelocklyn]

Cyno x Zubayr Theater Actress Reader

It is a dream come true for you to finally join the popular Zubayr Theater, you really love stage play ever since you're a little girl. You considered your debut as a big achievement in your life, it was pretty successful actually. You didn't get the main role you wanted to, but you acted as the villainess instead, but people praised you for your act, after your debut a lot of acting offer came for you (mostly antagonist role, but hey that's not so bad).

After a few play, you noticed this guy who stop by the theater every weekend. He's kinda a regular customer at the theater. It's hard not to recognize him in the crowd, his beautiful silver hair, tanned skin, and sharp looking red eyes, made him stand out to you even more. He seemed to be taking interest on your fellow friend's dance performance, the star of Zubayr Theater, Nilou. She almost got every main protagonist role in each of her play, her dance is absolutely gorgeous , even as an actress at the theater yourself, you admired Nilou a lot. Playing as a protagonist is fun, but you wished you can try something new, like receiving the role as a protagonist for once could be great honestly.

Soon it was the anniversary of the Akademiya, and the theater is going to make a big play, featuring some of the Akademiya scholars and alumni as actors and actresses in the play. The theater will be performing the story of The Great Rukhadevata, King Deshret, and Nabu Malikata. Unfortunately, you didn't get any big role in that play. Greater Lord Rukhadevata was played by your senior actress, Nilou get the role of Nabu Malikata, and a that regular weekend guy you noticed played as King Deshret. Soon, you found out that guy's name is Cyno, and he's the General Mahamatra of the Akademiya. Even though you didn't get a big role, you still work hard for this play, whatever your role is you want to perform your best.

Since it's a big play, the rehearsal usually took a long time, sometimes it can end up until 2 a.m. You were taking a small break from the rehearsal outside of the theater, you were planning to eat your homemade lunch, until you saw a familiar figure, you tried to remember his name for a while, "Cyno" You called, you noticed Cyno was struggling with something, so you decided to ask him, if he didn't mind telling you. As a General Mahamatra, Cyno was always busy, sometimes he skipped rehearsal, but as the day of the play getting closer, he had a hard time memorizing the script and acted the emotion. Cyno told you about his struggles, "Sorry, but I think I'm just not suitable for the role as King Deshret, both of the other actresses doing a really great job as Greater Lord Rukhadevata and Nabu Malikata" Cyno took a deep breath after that. You comforted Cyno after that, encouraging him with a few words before offering him your food. As you both enjoyed your food you told Cyno, "I could give you little help to memorize your dialogue you know" Cyno was very grateful that you are willing to help him. Because he's always busy, you and Cyno only practiced a few times together, he was great, he's improving a lot.

The day of the play finally came, you were relived when you saw Cyno was not panicking. The play went well, but suddenly in between the climax, an odd silence was happening on the stage, oh no, Cyno was forgetting his line, as you were part of the scene (you played as an eremite, King Deshret's subject) you yelled an improvised line to help Cyno without hesitation, great thing he was able to remember his line from that. The play ended as expected, everyone was satisfied. After the play, you wanted to talk to Cyno but hesitated when you saw him talking with Nilou, he looked so happy, somehow they look like a couple in your eyes. There's a strange bitter feeling when you saw them, so you just went home after the play.

The next weekend, the theater performed as usual, strangely Cyno didn't came that day, you assume he's probably busy with his work or something. But he still didn't show up the next two weeks either, this made you worried, you wanted to ask Nilou, but never had a chance to talk to her. You wanted to pay him a visit, but you just don't know where he lives and you're too shy to ask about his office.

That evening you were about to head home after your play, "Hey" You heard someone called you, it's Cyno, you've never have been so happy to see someone in your life as much as you see him now. Cyno invited you to a dinner, you were surprised by that.

"Cyno, how are you lately?"

"Me? I'm okay, just a little busy"

"Well, you surely are a busy person, you didn't even came to the theater for 3 weeks" You chuchkled

This time, Cyno was surprised, your words made him blushed, "You noticed I was absent from watching the shows?"

You nod "I thought you were sick after the play"

"No, no, I'm fine, I'm not sick or anything. Ah and this dinner, it's to show my gratitude for you, you helped me a lot during the play, I guess I haven't told you a proper thank you"

You smiled at him "No problem"

After your dinner, Cyno escorted you to your house. It was a wonderful night for the both of you. After that night, clearly you and Cyno getting closer with each other, he watched your shows, sometimes he walked you home, he even stop by for dinner at your house when he have time. It was unusually strange for Cyno to show up at your house in a Wednesday morning.

"Cyno? Did you left something in my house?"

"I believe I have"

"Well come in then" You said as you tried to memorize what belonging of him he might left from last week

Cyno grabbed your wrist "I believe I have left my heart here, and you stole them"

Your eyes widen at his words, "Hey, this is cheesy but, would you go out with me?" So all this time you've been assuming things in your head that Cyno falls for Nilou, yet you found out the truth after he told you about all these weekends his been showing up for you? Your stupid thoughts finally came to an end. Honestly your theater friends were surprised you just dated Cyno now because clearly before that you both already look like a couple.

[yan-may-fire]

ive struggled with art block for years and feel very discouraged because im already 19 and feel really behind so many people. im really stuck and dont really know what to do to get out of it and try and improve. as an amazing artist, do you have any tips on how to kind of start from scratch? like how do you learn ... stuff

I’m really sorry that you feel stuck, it’s not a pleasant feeling and I’ve experienced it myself many MANY times. First, let me preface, that your age is not that important. I’m turning 26 in a couple of months and I know there’s still SO MUCH I can improve on, I know artists who are younger than me and can do breathtaking art. I also know artists who didn’t even start drawing at my age, who started drawing a little later in life because they felt like doing art. So, who are you competing against? Why are you competing? Is self expression not goal enough? I’m not a professional artist, I don’t want to adhere to some industry standard, and most of all I don’t want to feel behind in an area that is so, SO personal to me.

Now, to the feeling stuck part. I’d love to say that in art, you’re always improving. Well, it’s not exactly the case. There are artists whose work doesn’t change for years and they feel content in what they do. Are they stuck? Not really — they feel fine. When you feel stuck in your art, it means that your brain has caught up to your physical ability and went beyond, it starts seeing flaws you haven’t noticed before. You’re very young still and have PLENTY of time to work up the pure handcraft of visual art. What I recommend is, start analysing what your hands are doing. Find an artwork in which you admire the skill of the artist and try to replicate the way their brushstrokes or lines work. Find a screenshot with really good colours and try to make little thumbnails with the colours and the shapes that you see. Don’t go for actually replicating screenshots, define a goal and don’t worry about the rest. If it’s the creative part you feel stuck on, my go to advice is always — stop and take a break. Go outside and look at your surroundings. Watch a movie, go down the rabbit hole of YouTube tutorials on how to restore a night stand (not obligatory), go to your local museum and just. Look. Let your brain wander in how beautiful mundane things are. How pretty are the faces of the people on your bus. Love what you see and with love comes art.

Now on to the learning part. This one is way less poetic because, well, the theory behind art is an academic field and I’m not an expert in it. There is a sea of decent art tutorials on YouTube, ranging from colour theory to multiple point perspective. If you have an artist who’s very skilled and happens to have a YT channel, watch them and really think about what they’re doing and why. I can’t stress this enough, if you want to actively learn something, you have to watch critically. If you have any spare money, you can invest in an art basics course too, god knows my brain expanded 40 times when I finally attended one, and I’ve been drawing for years before that. If you don’t have the finances for that — don’t worry. First, learning is a process and attending a class just sometimes accelerates it. Second, attending a class later in life does NOT mean you missed an opportunity. Rounding up, outside of any means of formal education you can still learn some useful things. Start with the basics, with the “boring” stuff (and I use parenthesis because drawing boxes is really fun actually), with “how to draw a straight line and what is line weight” and not “upper limb anatomy” or “advanced colour theory”. You’ll get there eventually, I promise. Just like I mentioned all the way in the beginning of this awfully long reply: it’s not a competition!

I hope this was useful in any way and I wish you lots of luck and patience. And love what you do, regardless of what other people do.