#it's so good and the writer is still fairly active just not writing for the Tortall fandom right now

[foreseers-flower]

my life is so cyclical. i find a hobby. i write self insert fanfiction for it. the cycle continues. how long? who knows. until i die perhaps!

[darkmoonkestrel]

daily kestrel 126:

I am bedded down in the tiger room for the night, Peyton and Paige are now both sicky bebbies and I need to attempt to avoid the plague for the next few days, esp if I wanna call out on Friday for the winter weather that's coming our way

I got to work slightly late this morning because apparently the rain caused slowdowns on the interstate, so although it was "quicker" to take the back roads, I was still there late. and as much as I don't really enjoy navigating multiple interstate interchanges on the daily, keeping up with that back roads route this morning was worse, some of those lines must be years overdue for repainting

I bounced around some but ended up in red room for the majority of the day. I wouldn't be surprised if they ask me to move to officially being the assistant in there, and as rough as that age group is, I like the lead teacher, so I'd probably say yes. it was nice to get to do their craft with them today, I got to paint their hands and have them do handprints on a snowman, and they're at the age where that is a very fun and novel activity

I've been slowly catching up with welcome to night Vale (I say catching up but I'm still on like EP 40something) and I listened to two episodes on my way to work this morning, but I was on hold with the trash company for so long on the drive back that I didn't even get halfway through an episode. at least the customer service guy was helpful and scheduled a special extra pickup for us since our can will be delivered on the same day we were supposed to have our first trash service, and one of the corners of the garage is slowly filling up with bags

after I got home I started on the chicken for dinner, and I was grumpy and wanting to play the game Paige got me for Christmas, so I went on a mission to the storage unit. I did not find the box I thought my DS case was in, but I did unearth and bring home the rest of the kitchen supplies, along with my Tamora Pierce books. I figured the box I was looking for must have made it to the blue room, and I was right, I found the box and the DS case... but my DS was not in there, nor was it in Peyton's nightstand. I think it must be packed with Paige's in the box labeled "DS devices," a box that I left in the storage unit today in favor of getting the kitchen things. I contemplated going back over there once I finished making the buffalo chicken dip, but it was already "30, feels like 20" outside so that plan got nixed. we ended up just watching a failcomp and a couple EPs of Below Deck (Captain Lee had to step down due to his health and we're all heartbroken) before Peyton tapped right around 9. Paige helped me make the bed up here and listened to me bemoan the fact that I'm reading an incomplete fanfic that was last updated in 2021 (a fact I knew going into the 110k+ reading) before she headed off to bed, and although it's just shy of 10, I think I shall also sleep, for tomorrow will dawn sooner (and colder) than I want it to, and I have to be out the door before dawn anyway

OH ps the live trap Harley and Karilyn let us borrow DID catch a squirrel this morning! Peyton and Paige drove it several miles away this afternoon and released it. however, it was apparently not the only one in our attic, so the trap has already been reset, and we wait for our next rodent to evict

[multifandomfanficss]

Don’t Stop My Heart

Tyler Owens x Reader

Prompt: You and Tyler take a road trip up to Iowa to catch some of the last tornadoes of the season, but he takes the teasing a little too far.

Warnings: Fluff, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, mentions of car crashes, swerving, shitty ex boyfriends. No use of Y/N.

A/N: Hello! I didn’t proofread this one as many times as I usually do. I’m coming off a 4 and a half month writers block so I really just wanted to write and post while I was excited to do it. My job has been draining me as of late, so I’m trying to write when I get the impulse. I have so many Tyler ideas and no time to write them. Crossposted on my AO3 adriansglasses.

It was still fairly early, the sun was still rising. Last night you���d planned an impromptu trip up north to Iowa. It was about a 7 hour trip from Oklahoma, so you were on the road before 6. You were hoping to get there around noon. You didn’t love getting up that early, but Tyler promised he’d drive you and you could sleep in the truck. Tornado season was pretty much over aside from an isolated storm or two, but Iowa had been having very unusual storm activity all week. Tyler couldn’t resist hitting a couple more tornadoes in late August when the season was supposed to be pretty much over with.

You stayed awake for a little bit. You wanted to watch as you crossed into Missouri.

“Missouri welcomes you.” Tyler reads out loud.

“Yes! Finally!” You giggle.

“I didn’t realize you were such a big fan of Missouri.” Tyler comments.

“Oh, I’m not.” You pause, looking out your window.

“First you’re hypin’ her up, now you’re gonna disappoint her.” He jokes.

“I’m sorry, I’m sure Missouri’s fine, but I’m more excited about that.” You point to a Hardee’s down the street.

“Really? We’re crossin’ state lines and you’re gonna make me take you to Hardee’s? You can get Carl’s Jr. anytime you want back home. That’s basically the same thing.” He argues.

“Take that back! You’re just saying that because you’re a Texas boy! You’ve never had the luxury of Hardee’s.” You joke.

“If Carl’s Jr. is better, I’m not letting you pick where we eat for the rest of the trip.” Tyler puts on his turn signal and sighs.

“How is that fair? I’ve never eaten at this location. What if it sucks?” You laugh.

“You picked your Hardee’s hill and now you’re gonna die on it. Now keep your trap closed and tell me what’s good on the menu.” Tyler makes a pretend threatening face towards you as he pulls into the drive thru.

“How am I supposed to not talk and at the same time tell you what’s good?” You tease back.

“Hi welcome to Hardee’s, may I take your order?” The drive thru speaker cuts you off. Tyler shushes you and you giggle.

After getting your food you start unwrapping the straws and putting them in both drinks.

“Whatever score we give this we need to give it extra points to account for how good the curly fries would be if they were serving lunch.” You try to bargain, taking a bite.

“No, you can’t just change the rules after we already got our food, that’s cheating. Just because you’re from the north, doesn’t mean you can cheat me.” He argues. He continues driving, leaving behind the paved roads of the small town.

“You’re acting like I’m Canadian!” You giggle.

“Well, Upper Midwest is basically Canada. There’s literally a town in Iowa called Toronto!” He smirks, taking the last bite of his food, continuing to drive through the middle of nowhere Missouri, back onto the gravel roads through the soybean fields.

“Shut up!” You playfully hit his arm. He jokingly swerves and your stomach flips. You gasp air. “Tyler, knock it off.”

“You’re the one who hit me.” He pleas innocent.

“I didn’t hit you that hard.” You defend.

“I thought you were gonna sleep on the drive.” He says, smirking.

“I might later, I’m not tired.” You answer, falling for his bit. He does a big fake yawn.

“Well if you’re not tired, I might take a little nap.” He lightly swerves again.

“Tyler, this isn’t funny!” You plead.

“What? Oh. Do you mind watching the road? We woke up so early and I’m pretty tired.” He jokes before swerving again. He’s taking the joke way too far. Once was one thing, twice was too much. You start hyperventilating.

“Tyler, STOP!” You yell, tears starting to come to your eyes.

“Woah woah woah, sweetheart, it’s okay. I’m sorry. I’ll stop.” He has a concerned look on his face. He knew he had taken it too far.

“It’s not funny.” You cry.

“You’re right, it’s not funny. I would never-a done it if I’d known it would make you feel unsafe. I do it all the time on chases and that don’t seem to bother you. I didn’t realize-“

“That’s different! The roads and the fields when there’s no storms are different! We’re on an actual road! What- what if there were other people?! What if you hit somebody?! What if a sherif saw?!” You say, obviously still panicking. Tyler decides to pull over.

“You’re right. I’m sorry. I was way outta line, but we’re in the middle of nowhere. There’s no cars or tractors around. We’re safe.” His voice is soft. “Just breathe, Darlin’. Just you and me.” He takes your hand, rubbing small circles in it. “I feel bad. I wanted a reaction outta you, but not like this. I never want you to feel unsafe with me.”

“I know.” You were still struggling to breathe. Tyler places your hand on his chest to feel the rise and fall of his breathing. He hopes you can sync yours with his own.

“Take it easy, sweetheart. You’re okay. Feel me breathing? We’re both okay.” He places a kiss to your forehead.

“I’m sorry… it’s not you. When I was in high school I had a crazy ex boyfriend who used to swerve in town just to scare me because he knew I was afraid of car crashes. He almost killed us a couple times, I think. I guess no matter how much time’s passed, dumb high school bullshit still affects me into my adult years.”

“Hey, that’s not okay. It’s not dumb bullshit. It’s trauma.” You lean over the console to be closer to him and he wraps his arms around you. “I would never put you in danger like that for the sake of a joke.” You could tell his blood was boiling on the inside, but he was trying to keep himself calm. He didn’t want to upset you more. He knew this was about you feeling better, not him.

“We gotta get going if we wanna try to make it by 1.” You wipe your tears.

“I don’t care how long we’re pulled over. Hell, we can even turn around if you’re not up to anymore. I don’t care about the chase. I care about you.” He moves your hair out of your face. “I can call the rest of the team and tell them to turn around right now or go without us.”

“What happened to Mr. If You Feel It, Chase It?” You joke, trying to lighten the mood. He looks into your eyes. You don’t know if you’ve ever seen him so serious.

“The only feeling that matters is the one I get when I’m with you.“

Tears start creeping up again. These tears aren’t bad, though.

“Tyler, I’m in love with you.” It just slips out, like the easiest confession you’ve ever made in your life. You both knew there was something there, but neither one of you were willing to say it. It had always been heavy flirting, awkward mornings after cuddling in the only bed left at the motel, a drunk kiss or two.

After a moment of staring in silence Tyler kisses you. Everything happened in slow motion, but in truth it was probably just the adrenaline slowing everything down. Tyler wasted no time in kissing you. It was the quickest decision he’s ever made. You don’t know how long the kiss was. Whatever it was, it wasn’t enough. Nothing would ever be enough. You’d swear off oxygen for the rest of your life if it meant this moment never had to end. You’d been pinning after your best friend for so long and finally the moment was here.

“I’m so glad you said something because you’re one of the best navigators I know and I really didn’t wanna risk losing you from the team by telling you I was in love with you.” Tyler laughs.

“Is that the only reason you didn’t tell me?” You ask.

“No, I was scared. Losing you from the team would be a bummer, but I couldn’t lose you from my life. We see a lot of loss in this business. Whenever I thought about it, the thing I couldn’t stand to lose most was you.” He runs his fingers through your hair, moving to cup your cheek.

“I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

It was nice to finally say it. You’d waited a long time to tell him.

“Let’s get back on the road. This time just don’t stop my heart.” You give a small laugh.

“You’re safe with me.”

“I know. You’re not like those other guys, Ty.”

You hold hands and rest on his other arm as he drives. He’s lucky he’s good at driving with one hand because he’s happy to see about 30 minutes later you’ve finally fallen asleep. Today was going to be a long day, but Tyler knew forcing the team to wake up so early was worth it. He may have had to bribe Boone 20 bucks to drive the other car up with Lily, but at least he didn’t have a third wheel sitting in the back seat. Tyler didn’t get a lot of alone time with you. Now he had 7 hours of it. It was worth it.

[loganhowlettshousewife]

lazy mornings and the proposal

animal - bonus headcanons

friendly reminder that i am not a writer, i'm just a girl who loves logan howlett and wanted to write something exploring his animalistic side since i so rarely see it done. my first language is also not english, so please do not be rude when giving me any feedback.

i wanted to let everyone know that even with the epilogue coming out soon and the series being officially over, i'm still not ready to let go of these two. so if you have any ideas or prompts or questions about feral!logan feel free to submit an ask!

warnings: mentions of sex, light sweat kink (oops)

series masterlist │my masterlist

there’s nothing better than a lazy morning with logan, staying in bed long past sunrise, chasing the warmth that can be found in each others arms. it’s rare, these days, now that he’s gotten a job as a lumberjack and has to be up fairly early most mornings for work, making sure to wake you before he leaves, kissing you deeply and reminding you that he loves you. gone are the days where the two of you would stay home together, locked in your own little world with no one to bother you.

he’d wanted - no, he’d needed, really- to get a job. it gave him something to do with his days, a purpose other than stalking your every move, following behind you like a shadow as you went about your day. it’s a distraction, and a welcome one, one that gives him the opportunity to be a more balanced version of himself, to find peace and trust that you aren’t going to disappear if he leaves you out of his sight for more than a few seconds.

he brings home a decent paycheck, much more than you were making by selling the extra produce from your garden. it’s unnecessary, everything you own had once belonged to your grandparents and has long been paid off, but it’s nice to have the extra cash, to be able to go into town with logan and splurge on expensive alcohol for him and gorgeous new dresses for you.

he’s good at what he does, hacking away at wood with his unnatural strength given to him by his mutation. he’s the best at what he does, to the point where you occasionally worry it’s become too obvious that he’s not like the others, but he always comes home safe.

the smell of wood and sweat cling to him like a second skin and you bury your face in his neck, understanding his obsession with doing the same to you, loving the way the smell of him surrounds you, makes you feel like he’s the only thing in the world. maybe it should be gross, he’s exerted himself all day and is covered by the proof of it, but there’s something about it that makes you melt into him every time.

he takes off his muddy shoes and picks you up, ignoring your squeal of protest at the unexpected gesture, smirks when you wrap your legs around his waist. he brings you into your bedroom to take the stress of his day out on your body or into the bathroom where you run your hands over his bare skin and wash away anything that isn’t your loving touch. either way, the tension leaves him the moment he’s returned to you, able to recognise that you’re safe.

you love the life you’ve built, the ease and comfort of it, and yet those lazy mornings, so few and far between, are still your favourite. the days where logan doesn't have to go into work and you push back your daily chores for later because you would much prefer to stay snuggled up in bed, laughing as he kisses your neck and bare shoulders, twinning your arms around his neck to pull him closer.

the night he proposes starts off like any other. he returns home from work to the smell of dinner in the oven, takes you apart under the warm stream of water from the showerhead beating down on your skin, lets you wash away the grime from his body and dig your hands into the tense muscles of his back, massaging away the day’s activities. he melts into you, letting you care for him in a way he’d never let anyone else, and you smile beatifically.

when you exit the shower, it’s to the sound of the oven timer going off, announcing that the dinner you’d prepared for the two of you is ready. you hardly notice when logan doesn’t follow you out of the bathroom and into the kitchen as usual - some days he returns from a long day on the job and refuses to leave your side, on others he needs moments of solitude peppered in to keep the overstimulation at bay.

he stops in your shared bedroom as you plate the food, giving logan double your portion size as usual.

his body requires more energy to function, his healing factor taking a lot out of him. it’s not something logan ever noticed, since he doesn’t bother to worry about his own health most of the time, but you see the way it affects him when he doesn’t eat the way he should. it’s horribly taxing on his body, making his veins protrude from his skin in harsh lines, a reminder that no matter how easy it is to ignore it when looking at his muscular and imposing stature, his body is still starving.

you’ve made it your mission to feed him, and so you narrow your eyes into a glare until he finishes his plate, leaning over afterwards to kiss the annoyance from your lips, muttering praises and thanks that have your skin tingling and face feeling hot. 

he’s healthier now, a layer of fat covering his muscles, a softness to his body that wasn’t there before. it’s something you pride yourself on, the knowledge that you’re taking good care of him.

he doesn’t talk much throughout dinner, though he never does. you tell him about the latest book you’ve started reading, going back and forth on whether or not you’re truly enjoying it, complaining about the characters personalities while raving about the writing style. it makes logan smile, watching you be so passionate.

he gives you a few vague sentences about his day at work when you press him about it. “it’s not that interesting,” he says, the same excuse he gives every day. occasionally, he’ll have some gossip to share about the men he works with, his enhanced hearing allowing him to listen to their conversations without being forced to partake in them, but not today. “would much rather listen to you talk, darlin’.”

with desert in front of you and a peaceful lull in they conversation he takes your hand, kisses the back of it with his slightly chapped lips before getting down on one knee and pulling out the ring he’d bought a few weekends ago while you perused the farmer’s market stalls. it’s not big or flashy, the night is hardly out of the ordinary in any way, but it’s perfect. your eyes prick with tears that you attempt to hold back but fall anyway the moment you blink.

this is what makes yours and logan’s relationship, the understanding that there’s no need to be anything but yourselves, that as long as he’s here promising to love you forever, pleading you to do the same, there’s nothing else that could come close to matching the joy in your heart as you say yes.

taglist: @mystiquesvendetta @raeinyourdreams @babey-fruit-bat @meetmypointlessaddiction @kneelforloki @deaky-with-a-c @hypermarvellove @littlepeanut03 @the-ruler-of-death @aliengutzstuff @misscrissfemmefatale @mynamesstevenwithav @teaganthemorningstar @blackkatzz @leryg0 @fries11 @forksloree @i5uckersblog @dragovegogrimborn @quillycrow @melday0105 @just-a-little-cellist @scorpiosaintt @akasha157-blog @insanesosciopath @eridektbh @trickstergabriel69 @lord-bingus666

[l0vem41l]

mean when i'm nervous.

「 tws + notes: no tws, unedited as BAWLS, dc writer newbie but im very enthusiastic abt the comics and shows and movies, dog metaphor but insane and unsubtle, explicitly vigilante!reader in dick grayson’s part, dramatic asf but not really angst 」

「 gn!reader, can be platonic or romantic <3 」

↳ ft. bruce wayne, clark kent, richard "dick" grayson, and john constantine

author's note: so. we all know what my favourite thing right now is (⌒_⌒;) i still adore everything i used to write for,,, but i’ve been on my comic motives recently (*ﾟｰﾟ*) ! reading dc mostly but spider-noir and deadpool have been picked up along the way!!! um. anyways. if i get comfy enough, i might do more dc stuff but i get that this isn't my exact audience on this blog— sorry my loves (´＿｀。) </3 might write a part two cuz i love jason. and booster gold. and like every single one of them (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ) halfway through writing this i realized everything feels very literal, so i feel the need to mention that this is not dog hybrid reader stuff but if u fw that u can imagine it that way

perhaps the habit of burning bridges you’re actively crossing isn’t a good idea. and you’re not an idiot, not in the slightest— but even if you were, everyone knows that needless self destruction when developing relationships is counterproductive.

you strike the match anyways, like it’s just a force of habit. another instinct.

if you spent life knowing that the hand only beats. why would you expect it to do anything else when it’s lowered towards you?

you learn to keep your hopes down, ears alert, and teeth sharp. you learn to get used to the taste of blood. to make things messy and complicated, and to end things when they need to be ended, because god knows it’s only self preservation when you do it.

you learn that the only way to survive is to bite— to hurt before something hurts you.

and one day, an unfamiliar hand that extends towards you decides to feed instead.

why do you still bare your teeth?

▸ BRUCE is unsure why he sticks around. he’s understanding, but also reasonably frustrated with your antics. it doesn’t evade him that they stem from something deeply rooted in your past— but he doesn’t know what to do about it. if there is anything to do.

at his core, he's a detective. he's got an eye for digging into strange pasts and a knack for knowing things he isn't supposed to. but in spite of his paranoia and hunger to know, bruce doesn't pry too much. he can do research on his own, without you ever having to realize.

you’re self-sufficient, he’ll give you that. you’re unsure sometimes of whether he’s proud that you can take care of yourself or irritated that you consistently insist on doing so. he’s unsure too. not like he lets you know.

it’s a mutual understanding the two of you share— he stays, you bite. yet bruce, unsurprisingly, doesn’t mind being bitten. he’d hope that the reason he’s sticking around is for the selfless reason of making sure you’re alright. though, the reality is, you’ve grown on him, whether you realize or not.

bruce has always been fond of strays.

▸ CLARK is nothing but patient. and that scares you beyond reason.

he sees the way you bare your teeth whenever someone gets too close for comfort to you. he knows when to back away, when to speak, when not to— he’s always attempting to never make you feel backed into a corner.

somehow, it makes you more anxious seeing just how much he understands about you. he knows just how to coax you out of the corner of your cage, how to bring you in closer, and it almost, almost convinces you to let your guard down.

the thought of that is terrifying.

you try barking, you try biting— and none of it works. clark doesn’t coddle you when you’re wrong— but he’s absolutely nothing but gentle. patient and understanding, sometimes you wonder how a man of steel can be so soft for someone like you.

▸ DICK isn’t dumb. it’s fairly easy for him to put two and two together. quickly, he figures out what he’s dealing with when he encounters you.

his conversations with you are never without a note of levity— a deliberate action on his end, you’re certain. he knows, you know, and because of it, everything feels oddly tense around him, even with the attempts to banter.

it’s too late to run. his observant gaze has caught a glimpse of you through your one way glass, and he’s chosen to meet your eyes with a smile. there's a sense of foreboding that gnaws at your gut, anxiously anticipating what might be lurking under that grin of his.

on his end, there are no malicious intentions. he doesn’t really have ulterior motives when it comes to you.

most times, he chooses to defend you and be the one standing at your side when no one else does. you don't understand why he insists on offering you friendship when all you do is pull away.

after a long night of patrolling the streets of gotham, you find the two of you leaning on the railing of a rooftop side by side. your eyes are on this cityscape of gotham. his are on you.

“you keep on insisting i’m not as bad as i seem,” you mutter under your breath.

late nights make for loose lips. he’s pleasantly surprised to hear you continue the thought instead of attempting to take it back.

“do you just hate being right?” you snort, allowing your gaze to flit over to him just for a second.

"no." dick smiles, shrugging his shoulders nonchalantly. “i think you just hate the fact that i could be.”

▸ you tried not to bother with CONSTANTINE. the day the two of you met, you didn’t even introduce yourself.

john constantine’s presence alone reeks of trouble, as acrid and suffocating as the cigarette smoke that clings to his tan trenchcoat. you are attuned to things like that. he notices.

one thing you actually enjoy about him? he doesn’t chase. he’s a nosy one, for certain, sticking his nose into places no one in their right mind would— but for the most part, he steers clear of yours. initially, you think it’s because your urge to be left alone by him is so prevalent that he’s just chosen to heed the warning and not approach when unwanted.

but he’s not a man known for abiding by rules. he’s much more curious with you than you notice or prefer. in a way, your distance has made you more myth than man, more tale than tangible— you are a rumor passed through whispers between lips, a silent shadow lurking in the corner of the room… and he loves a good mystery.

“c’mon. you're actin’ like ‘m gonna bite your head off, luv,” he chuckles, lighting up the cigarette between his fingers.

i'd probably be the one doing that if i got any closer. you keep that thought in your head, standing with a gap between the two of you as always.

he doesn't miss how you avoid looking into his eyes like his gaze could murder, instead, focusing your gaze on the cherry of the cig, burning bright red.

“not much for a wee natter, hm?”

the quick shake of your head only makes his smirk grow. you could just walk away… so why exactly were you sticking around?

“fine by me. quiet company’s welcome.” that’s a sentence he’d probably never say to anyone else. in a strange way, he feels like he knows you well enough to be comfortable with the words that hang in the air.

it’s weird. you’re completely unknown, and yet, an irrational part of his mind keeps nagging at him to look just a little closer at you. sometimes, when he listens to it, he catches a glimpse of something silent in your eyes— an all too familiar pain of a person who can’t help but hurt the things that they cling onto.

so that’s why you’re keen on keeping everyone at arms length. it almost makes him laugh to think how similar the two of you are, plain as day, and yet unnoticed by you— a person who won’t even meet his eyes.

— reblogs always appreciated!

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

I must say: I’m genuinely impressed by how creative all your stories are. I have three questions related to your writing process, if you don’t mind.

1) How do you stay motivated to keep creating?

2) Where do you find inspiration?

3) have you ever had an idea for a scene that you struggled to execute? How did you work through that to write the scene?

I love your stories! I look forward to every chapter of Charlie McNamara.

1) Motivation to create has never been an issue for me -- there's always some new thing to write about! My issue, and the issue faced by a lot of other writers, is the motivation to stick with a project to completion. That's hard. Everyone's got a hundred "works in progress" they'll never touch again because they took a break and when they came back, their attention was on something new and shiny.

My solution to this? Money.

The reason I started Curse Words as a web serial and opened a patreon for it wasn't because I ever expected to be able to make a living as a writer. I'm as surprised as anyone that so many kind people have put their support behind me and let me keep writing these fucked up stories instead of getting a real job. I did it because I wasn't getting my projects finished. I was doing what we all do; getting three quarters of the way through any given project and then finding something more fun to work on instead. And when you risk disappointing readers by doing that, well, that'll get you back in the seat over the little bumps, maybe pull you back to a project a few times. But when people are paying you actual cash in return for consistent output, on time, to story completion? That's a way bigger motivator. Even if it's just one guy. For a long time, I had one patron! It was enough! It worked! It's not about making a lot of money, which is borderline impossible as a writer (again, I still can't believe my supporters are so generous enough that i can make this my career). But it acts as some level of both proof that your work is valued, and an active obligation on your part to keep producing it on a consistent schedule. My readers are giving me something valuable for this. I can't let them down.

Sorry, I'm sure you wanted a more uplifting kind of answer. But that's just what works for me.

2) I've never really been sure how to take this question. This is basically the age-old 'where do you get your ideas?' and it... doesn't have an answer. You think of a thing and you write about it. As you resolve the problems and inconsistencies in the thing, that fills out more and more of the world of the story.

Angel is born of a mediocre Goosebumps book called Chicken, Chicken. There's a part in the book where the protagonist, slowly shapeshifting into a chicken, rips all his feathers out every morning in an attempt to slow the transformation. The book isn't really about that but it stuck with me for a good two decades until, stuck in the house for two months at the beginning of Covid, I wrote Angel.

Void Princess and The princess in the Tower are both me musing on the old 'princess kidnapped by a dragon' trope. I get really fixated on this trope for some reason; I have four or five others swimming about in my head that aren't full stories ready for the page yet. Wasting Time is just the song Pushin' the Speed of Light, World Builder was written in a fever right after watching Jacob Geller's The Shape of Infinity, Copykate was initially going to be a SAYER fanfic but required enough alterations to the setting that it worked better as a story of its own. The inspiration is out there, the ideas are out there. It's just a matter of practice to turn them into stories.

3) I try to avoid scenes that are hard for me to depict, but this isn't always possible. I'm aphantasiac and struggle a lot with scenes that have a lot of heavy visual elements. Scenes where there's a lot going on that needs to be fairly precisely depicted are tricky, too.

One particularly difficult scene for me was a fight scene in Time to Orbit: Unknown. There's about six people in a small room fighting over the fate of a bunch of other people who are not present, and the reader needs to be kept up to date on the physical positions/activity/intentions of all the combatants, the villain explaining what he's doing and why (lying), the protagonist figuring out that he's lying, the physical condition (injuries, being restrained, et cetera) of all of the combatants, and the fate of the half of the crew not in the room, all with enough detail that the reader can understand the stakes, consequences, and enough of the moment-to-moment logic of the fight that nobody's decisions are confusing. The whole thing is very fast paced and... it's a lot. It's always a difficult balance in these scenes because you want to be detailed enough to keep the reader following everything they want to follow, but you don't want to dramatically slow down the story by describing every detail. If you're using a limited viewpoint, it's a blessing and a curse; you can avoid narrating the stuff your character can't see or isn't paying attention to, but you also have to find a way to get across information that your character might not be able to see, either by forcing them to see it or by having it conveyed in some other way in the scene. With busy scenes like this, I like to work backwards -- decide what specifically the reader needs to know, decide what is needed to get the characters to the places I want them at the end of the scene, and write a scene with as little as possible in it except for those two things. Sometimes, communicating those two things requires a bit of setup.

In Curse Words, there's an ancient magic spell passed down a family line from parent to child. It's a communication spell that allows people to see through each others' eyes and hear through their ears. Before the existence of long-distance wireless communications, this sort of information transfer was enormously powerful; wars can be turned with that power, trade networks created or conquered. It made its family enormously powerful, to the point where they're the most powerful magical family in the world even in the time of the story, with the spell long buried and its advantage lost to an age of mobile phones and cameras. It's massively influential to the worldbuilding of the story.

I introduced it for one reason and one reason alone -- I knew that eventually, I would be writing a climax to the story where a lot of people were doing a lot of things in a lot of different locations, and the protagonist was only going to be in one of those places. And I knew that I was going to need some way to tell the audience what the fuck was happening while he was running around in caves and shit.

[literaryvein-reblogs]

Writing Notes: Plagiarism

Most students know it’s not okay to copy and paste someone else’s writing into a document and pass it off as their own. However, there are times when students are trying to paraphrase or are quoting a source where things are less black and white, and the concept of plagiarism can become unclear.

In most of your college writing assignments, you’ll be asked to use information from outside sources. Therefore, it is essential you know how to avoid plagiarism and why writers should properly give credit to the authors of those sources.

What is Plagiarism?

The use of someone else’s ideas as your own.

If you take someone else’s ideas and use them in your paper without giving proper credit, you are plagiarizing.

Although, most of the time, plagiarism is unintentional, it is still each student’s responsibility to learn how to properly attribute material to the original author/s.

Citing Correctly

A common mistaken belief is that citations are only needed for direct quotes, but this is not the case.

Generally, you should provide a citation for any information that is not common knowledge or your own ideas.

Example: You wouldn’t need a citation to write that the sky is blue because that is common knowledge.

However, if you write that the sky is blue because blue light is reflected by particles in the atmosphere more than other colors, your reader may expect you to provide a citation.

Can’t I Just Paraphrase?

Another possible misconception regarding plagiarism is that paraphrasing means taking a sentence from a source, changing a couple words, and providing a citation.

However, paraphrasing is more than just changing a word or two.

Rather, it is taking another person’s ideas and putting them in your own unique words.

Still, any lengthy series of words taken verbatim from a source need to be placed in quotation marks.

A rule to keep in mind is when four or more consecutive, verbatim words are used from a source, place them in quotes.

Strategies for Avoiding Plagiarism

When in Doubt, Cite

Many students worry that too many citations makes it appear that they are relying too heavily on source material and not thinking for themselves.

While some assignments will require you to use more of your own words and ideas, if you are in doubt about whether to cite something, it is wise to go ahead and cite it.

This way, you do not have to worry about being accused of plagiarism if the sentence in question reads more similarly to an idea taken from one of your sources than to your own ideas.

Because plagiarism is considered a fairly serious offense in academia, it is better to be safe than sorry.

Take Notes

When conducting research, it’s a good idea to write down the bibliographic information for your sources in addition to what you plan to use from those sources.

Make sure you have, at the very least, the author’s name and title of the work to help you cite your source material later.

In addition, be sure to place appropriate quotation marks around material taken directly from your sources so you do not confuse it with your own thoughts.

Otherwise, you might forget where you got a particular piece of information and/or whether or not it is in your own words.

It can be anxiety-inducing to be nearing a deadline but unable to find the citation details for a source.

To avoid this stress, record bibliographic information as you research.

It is also helpful to think of this notetaking as a halfway point between initial research and writing the paper.

Breaking down your source material by putting the author’s argument and main points into your own words helps you to better understand the sources with which you are working.

Moreover, active notetaking is good practice for putting the author’s ideas into your own words.

Source ⚜ More: Writing Basics & Refreshers

[officialleehadan]

Writing Pregnancy

Hello darlings. I've been thinking about writing this for a while, and it seems useful to a lot of people who are planning to Baby or who have characters who are planning to, or currently are, Babying.

It's not exactly a story, but y'all seem to like these essays from time to time, so I hope this one is interesting too.

So here it is. A guide to being pregnant as written by someone who has recently done it, for writers who have not or will not do it themselves.

This post will be broken down by weeks, because that’s how medical people do it, and also because some of this stuff really doesn’t happen by month.

DISCLAIMER: Every pregnancy is different. Your mileage may differ, maybe a lot. This is based on my pregnancy and is written as a handy reference for people who haven't done this themselves.

An important note, doctors count pregnancy as having begun AT THE DATE OF THE FIRST DAY OF YOUR LAST PERIOD unless there are extenuating circumstances such as an extremely unreliable, or nonexistent period. If this is the case, they will judge it based on your first ultrasound (8 weeks or so) or by when morning sickness kicks in (6-10 weeks) depending on the tech level your character is facing.

Be aware, this guide will be fairly explicit and will talk about the squishy bits, since they’re pretty involved in this whole business. If you keep reading and discover the horrible truth, that pregnancy is profoundly icky in many ways, I warned you.

Anyway, on to the fun part!

FAQ:

I am in my early-mid 30s (early when newly pregnant, older now obviously) when I was pregnant. I am in sound, but not neurotypical, mental health, and good physical health. I do not have major allergies or food issues other than caffeine which I am allergic to. (This is also relevant. More on this later.) I have some notable back problems which will be noted here because they’re relevant too. This pregnancy was planned and I have a wonderful and extremely supportive spouse (husband) who is the baby’s biological father. I also work a lot, but from home, which very much altered my experience

Week One: FIRST TRIMESTER

Technically speaking, right now, you’re probably menstruating and not actually pregnant at all. This will feel like a normal period, because that’s what it is. You’re not pregnant yet. Business as usual. If you were planning to get pregnant, you’re already on prenatal vitamins.

Week Two:

Congrats! You got laid! You still feel normal because implantation hasn’t happened yet. You’re still not technically pregnant. Just horny. Get it while it’s hot. If this pregnancy was an accident, or you’re trying to get pregnant, you’re not eagerly awaiting the point where you can test to know for sure.

Week Three:

Okay this is where you might see your first symptoms if your cycle is very regular, like mine is, and you’re watching your body closely for “that’s new” stuff. In my case, my boobs started swelling like they do when I’m on my period, except I was two weeks out from my period. Cue “huh, I might be pregnant” montage.

Week Four:

If you can test and you’re using the good home tests, or you’re in a hospital, this is probably when you test positive for pregnancy. Congrats!

Cue the “oh crap I’m pregnant??” Montage. (Yes this will happen even if you wanted it, planned it, and were actively trying to get pregnant. There will be some panic. You very likely will consider getting an abortion even if you’re eager and wanting the pregnancy. Don’t beat yourself up. This is normal.)

Week Five:

If your cycle is reasonably regular, this is when you’re gonna miss your first missed period. If you knew you’re pregnant, this is cool! Menstruation sucks. Not having your period for nine months is one of the best parts of pregnancy. If you didn’t know you’re pregnant, you’re probably panicking about now and buying a home test.

The ClearBlue digital ones are good and they’re in most pharmacies. Get those ones. Buy your prenatals at the same time. If you don’t want them, you don’t want them, but if you do want them, making a second trip is annoying. Also consider taking D3, calcium, fiber gummies, and fish oil. They all support you and baby health and keep the pregnancy from taking more of the nutrients form your body than you can spare.

Week Six:

You feel like you should feel different and don’t, and it’s weird. For those with a longer, or irregular cycle, this might be where you hit the stuff from Week Five. If you’re having the boob inflation like I did, that’s still happening. Buckle up. It’s not gonna stop. Otherwise, you feel weirdly normal. For a character who doesn’t have access to good sex education, they may not even know they’re pregnant yet.

Week Seven:

Basically the same as Week Six. You feel like you should feel different, and don’t. It’s uncommon, but you might start feeling morning sickness around this point. It’ll start as vague nausea and food aversions. This will get worse.

Week Eight:

Your first ultrasound! Congrats! It looks like a gummy bear that twitches! If you have twins, it may or may not be detectable at this point. You can’t tell the sex yet. It’s a gummy bear. If you don’t get an ultrasound for reasons of fictional story, you still might not know you’re pregnant. If you’re going to get an abortion, this is the last chance in many places.

Week Nine:

So It Begins. The morning sickness. You have food poisoning all the time. You feel profoundly like hell and may be prone to puking, and still being hungry, so you go back and keep eating, because you need the calories. This is also when you start getting thirsty all the time. This is because you gain more than half again your blood volume while pregnant. You need that hydration to make blood and amniotic fluid for your baby.

I found ice cream bars with nuts to be very good for dealing with morning sickness, and ginger did absolutely nothing at all. I basically lived on tea for a while there.

Week Ten:

Congrats. You feel like crap basically all the time. My morning sickness was pretty mild and I was puking almost every day. More if I hit a trigger food, which for me was anything that tasted or smelled ‘green’ (zucchini especially but cucumber and most leafy greens too) ‘water smell’ (showering, rain, humidity in general) and the usual ick smells (the trash).

You’re also tired all the time. Naps R Us. If you get flat and comfortable, you’re gonna fall asleep. If you’re flat and uncomfortable you might fall asleep. If you’re reasonably supported and upright you might fall asleep. Just assume you’re gonna be sleeping a lot.

If you’re writing a character with morning sickness, they’re likely to be very cuddly, but also very reluctant to go more than a very quick jog to the toilet.

The good news is that this is also when the major risk of miscarriage is over, and is frequently when people tell their families they’re expecting. Cue lots of celebrations!

Week Eleven:

“What the crap did I get myself into?”

Week Twelve:

“When is this crap gonna go away?”

Your baby is moving now, but you can’t feel it at all. You’ll see it in the ultrasounds however, which is neat.

Week Thirteen: SECOND TRIMESTER

“I have been eating soup and applesauce for FOUR WEEKS and I want Mexican but refried beans went Badly.”

it’s not uncommon to get a UTI at this point because you’re peeing a lot and it’s tough to stay clean because water smell makes you puke. Your doctors will take this uncomfortably seriously. You will get The Good Antibiotics, not the piddly crap they usually give out.

You will also now have very strong opinions about what sucks to puke up, as dictated by your nose, which has opinions about everything. You will have safe foods. Unfortunately for you, you’re just about past needing them.

Week Fourteen:

“I want a sandwich with deli meat, and a whole plate of sushi, and I can’t have either of them. This sucks.”

If you gave up caffeine, this is where that will really get hard. If you were already caffeine free, like I was, you’ll be jonsing for stuff you’re not allowed to have, like raw fish and deli meat. Be strong, but if you waver, it probably isn’t the end of the world. 

I’m told this is where cravings kick in, but I didn’t get anything notable, so I don’t know.

Week Fifteen:

This is about the time you kind of start feeling better. They say morning sickness starts improving around Week Thirteen, but for me it was longer. The napping is still a thing, so just be okay with that. This also when I started to show. That really depends on body type. I went into pregnancy carrying a little extra weight because I knew I would lose some during morning sickness (I lost nine pounds and mine wasn’t that bad. Be aware.) so it took a little longer for me to show.

More interestingly, you can actually feel your uterus now. It’s kind of like a grapefruit below your belly button. It will grow. You will be very curious about it the whole time

Week Sixteen

“Hey, I kind of feel better now!”

You have energy again. It’s novel. You can do chores and drive, and generally be a person. It shouldn’t be as exciting as it is, but here we are. Time to decorate the nursery if you have one, and to put together a whole bunch of stuff. It’s also a good time to clean up the ‘first trimester disaster’ that is your comfy spot and the mounds of crap around it.

Week Seventeen:

Still napping a lot, but almost feel human. Watch out for the Icks (your pregnancy sensitivities, like ‘green’ for me, which didn’t go away for my whole pregnancy) but you can actually take a shower without puking in the shower now! Scented products may or may not bother you later, but you’ll want them after you give birth. I threw away my shower gel after it made me sick and I regret it now.

Week Eighteen:

“Wow, I have a Baby Bump!” Cue walking around with your hand in your belly so everyone knows you’re pregnant OR wearing your biggest baggiest clothing to hide it and still feeling like it’s super obvious.

Week Nineteen:

There’s a fair chance you felt your baby move at this point, but unfortunately you’re also farting enough to fill the Hindenburg and this early any kicks feel like gas. Stay away from open flames and you’ll be okay.

Week 20: HALFWAY DONE!

Anatomy scan! This is your second ultrasound and the one where you might find out the sex of your baby. This is also where they’ll look for birth defects and genetic conditions. You may also do a blood test here which can also screen for genetic issues, and problems such as RH incompatibility, which is totally treatable with modern science but could kill a baby in a more medieval story.

Note: you may not find out the gender at this or any point until birth. My little girl got her nickname of Wiggles because she was doing cartwheels and the tech couldn’t get a good look between her legs. We didn’t find out her gender until she was born.

If you do find out, and this is crucial, DO NOT tell anyone but your partner what the sex is, or what names you’re considering. Everyone has opinions and all of them suck. Lie through your teeth about not knowing, or just tell them you want it to be a surprise. Do anything but tell them what they want to know. You will regret it if you do

Week Twenty-One:

“Holy crap that was intense. Definitely a kick!”

This is called the ‘quickening’ and for a fantasy character, will be one of the big ‘you’re really pregnant’ signs, because miscarriage is common. At twenty weeks, that risk is much less, which is a huge relief. Plus, now you’re getting kicks, which are all kinds of fun. It’s your first chance to really interact with the person you’re building inside you!

Week Twenty-Two:

“I need to clean the whole house right now everything is dirty I might rearrange the living room.

Welcome to nesting. It doesn’t go away. Use it to your advantage and clean whatever needs cleaning. Don’t judge yourself for starting and not finishing a project. You’re burning everything you have. Shame isn’t welcome here.

A fantasy character may start cleaning if they’re poor, or making baby clothing.

Week Twenty-Three:

Okay here’s where I started having problems. I have hypermobile ribs and mild scoliosis in my lower spine, these together mean a lot of back pain over the years, which I am very familiar with and which is annoying at best and debilitating at worst.

The issue? Pregnancy comes with a huge dose of the natural chemical relaxin. As the name implies, this softens up your tendons, among other things. If you have hypermobility already, get ready for a whole range of fun new ways to pop your bones out of place.

The worse issue? During pregnancy, you’re not allowed any painkiller but Tylenol. If you’re like me and hyper resistant to most pain meds, you might as well be popping tiktacs for all the good Tylenol will do for you.

Buy a heat pad (NOT A BLANKET, you cannot overheat right now) it will help.

If you tell your medical professionals about this back pain, they will freak out and want to get your kidneys tested, because asymptomatic UTIs can turn into kidney infections very quickly during pregnancy and can get very serious very quickly. If you are familiar with your particular brand of back pain, have the “Chronic Pain and You” conversation with your doctor early. The earlier the better. They still won’t give you anything better than Tylenol, but they probably won’t try to test your kidneys unless you pop a fever

Week Twenty-Four:

Kicking! Those are real kicks! Holy crap! Kicking!

This is so much fun, but it's also pretty unreliable. Baby will kick when it pleases them, not when you want to show someone else, and it'll be sporadic, even until the very end.

You may be getting Braxton hicks contractions. They don’t hurt, but they make your belly tense up, which is amusing. Also, when you orgasm, your uterus will get all hard. It does this normally, you just can’t usually feel it. It might freak you out a little. Coincidentally you will be horny enough to hop aboard just about anything that holds still long enough. Get a willing partner and/or a very fine collection of sex toys and be prepared to spend a lot of time taking yourself in hand.

Week Twenty-Five:

Your Dr appointments now happen every two weeks unless they’re worried about something. Also, buy a really comfortable pair of slip on shoes. Your time of being able to reach your feet is coming to an end and you’re gonna want them. Pro: maternity clothing is super soft and comfy and you’re gonna be delighted to wear it. It does tend to come in an unfortunate variety of ‘little house on the preggo’ floral patterns with demure necklines, but there’s some good stuff out there

Week Twenty-Six:

The Eater Beast Appears. You’re hungry all the time. No really. All the time. Constantly. Nuts are good for a snack. I ate a lot of peanut butter and apples. You may be having cravings. If so, lean into them. Have fun with it. This is the good part of your pregnancy.

Plus side, EVERYTHING tastes good!

Week Twenty-Seven

You REALLY look pregnant now. People will start asking when you’re due and giving you bad advice. Don’t murder them. You can probably get away with it, but cleaning up all that blood is hard when you can’t actually get off the ground without help anymore.

Week Twenty-Eight: THIRD TRIMESTER

Final ultrasound and gestational diabetes testing. The ultrasound is fun because Baby looks like a baby now! Holy crap! There’s a whole person inside you! You contain twice the usual number of bones! If you’re having a boy, you have in fact grown a pair.

My baby had a tiny little heart defect, so we talked to a specialist at this point. Try not to freak out if this happens. Defects like that are very easy to fix, and often go away on their own as my girl’s did.

The diabetes testing is different for everyone. They’ll have you drink a glycerin drink (get the orange flavored one. It’s reasonably inoffensive and you have to chug the stuff) and will test your blood to see how you react to the sugars. Don’t freak out if it’s positive. Most of the time gestational diabetes goes away after birth. If you’re borderline, they’ll test you again but for three hours rather than one.

The glycerin drink made me really sick and I refused to do the three hour testing. They will get very grumpy if you do this, however, you can buy a diabetic testing kit and track your blood sugars four times a day for a week instead, and they’ll accept that too. (Don’t get the one they prescribe. The Contour Next is cheap, reliable, easy to use, and doesn’t cost $200)

They might want you to change your diet and exercise. You will want to murder them for this. Don’t do it. Go for the damn walks and eat less carbs. It will kind of suck, but it’s for your baby, and it isn’t permanent.

Week Twenty-Nine

Return of the Nap Demon. You will sleep SO MUCH. Let it happen. Your body is working hard to build another person. Have mercy on yourself. Eat. Be okay with the weight gain. A lot of it is the baby inside you and your placenta, and the fluid you need to support them both. You need the calories.

Also, LACTATION! This is when two more of your orifices, which previously did not leak, start to leak. This too, will get worse. You can save the colostrum for your baby though, which can be helpful.

Week Thirty:

The Final Countdown. You’re ten weeks off your due date and if you haven’t already, you need to figure out how and where you want to give birth. Talk with your midwives and doctors. If you’re high risk, they won’t want you to give birth outside a hospital. This will feel crappy, but is honestly the safest choice provided you’re willing to tell doctors to piss off when needed. Start figuring out your birth plan. Talk to other expecting parents.

Week Thirty-One:

“Ugh, I’m huge.”

At this point, your character absolutely is not getting on a horse without a lot of help, and cannot ride for long regardless without serious discomfort or even pain. A fall could mean losing the baby, or a serious injury, and the undercarriage is not gonna handle having that much weight on it for long without protestations.

Week Thirty-Two

“Why am I crying? I’m not actually upset about anything and yet, I am hysterical.”

Warn your partner about this phase beforehand. They won’t believe how bad it’s gonna get, but the warning is still nice to have. Remind them that you warned them between bites of your favorite ice cream.

Week Thirty-Three:

Everyone you know who has baby stuff will try to give it to you. Be prepared to refuse whatever you don’t want. Be merciless or you will be flooded with broken baby crap you don’t want until you find some other poor soul to pawn it off on.

Week Thirty-Four:

You’ve been talking names, but now it’s time to decide for real. Try to follow this guide with your baby name options. Your kid will thank you for it.

1. Easy to say (no weird pronunciations)

2. Easy to spell (you are permitted ONE silent letter and no more)

3. Does not require explanation (Cultural names of a culture you’re not part of, especially)

4. Sounds good with middle and last name

5. Initials don’t spell something weird or stupid (Dora Indigo Kennedy sounds great, but the initials spell DIK)

6. Has agreeable nicknames (Elizabeth > Lizzy)

7. Isn’t a gimme for bullies to make fun of (Pubert)

8. Isn’t in the top 10 most popular names within the last five years. (Don’t want five of them in the same class)

9. Is not the name of someone you hate, even if it’s also the name of a family member. (obviously)

Follow these, and you will have a happy child who does not resent you for naming them something weird and messed up that no one can ever say or spell correctly, and which they have to explain every time they introduce themselves

Week Thirty-Five

You’re huge. You’ve just about reached maximum size and if your baby comes early at this point, they’ll probably be fine. This is immensely reassuring, because you have spent the last several months panicking about what if the baby comes early. Nightly baths are amazing. Also, your hair and nails will grow super fast right now, so be ready for that.

Week Thirty-Six:

Mobility is a serious issue. Stairs are hard. So are curbs. Getting into and out of a car is a Process and getting up off the couch or out of bed takes a While unless you have help. Your balance is screwed and you waddle now. You’re a real fall risk and that does change how you interact with the world.

You also probably can’t unload the laundry if it’s a top-loader, and you might not be able to do the dish washer either. Bonus! Less chores

Week Thirty-Seven:

Remember the Nap Demons? They’re back and they brought a friend. Heartburn Hell. It’s been bad for a while but it’s worse now. Skip the tums and go for something stronger.

Week Thirty-Eight:

Your craps are gone. Baby is due in fourteen days and you have given up on your good habits. You’re probably still walking, but only because Baby has their head lodged against your cervix and is trying to burrow out. People call this lightning crotch for a reason because it really feels like you have a taser lodged up there that gives you a shock now and then

On the plus side, baby kicks like crazy now and that’s both awesome and kind of uncomfortable. You can play with their feet and poke them, and they’ll probably have a favorite place to hang out in your belly. Pro tip, if baby just will not settle, get a hot pack and put it against the side where they hang out. They’ll curl up and go to sleep on it. Just make sure you don’t overheat.

If you think anyone this pregnant is doing much of anything except growl about how heavy they feel and eat, you’re wrong. Nobody is leading armies to war like this. Anyone trying to fight because their life is immediately in danger will probably lose because they are large, heavy, clumsy, and their center of gravity is toast.

Week Thirty-Nine:

The last rush of Nesting and it’ll be a bad one. You’re gonna try to do all kinds of stupid crap, like scrubbing the floors (you get stuck) climbing up ladders (you are a fall risk, get down) trying to drive places (you get dizzy, you should not be driving at this point) and trying to lift heavy stuff (absolutely not). You might try to paint your nursery or hang curtains. I tried to plant my whole garden. Don’t be me

Week Forty:

The Due Date Has Come. You’re now on baby-watch. You’re probably having a ton of Braxton Hicks, but the big difference between them and the real deal is pain. Braxton Hicks don’t hurt and real ones kind of feel like period cramps. How uncomfortable contractions are at first will really depend on how you handle pain.

Week Forty-One:

“What the hell do you mean I haven’t gone into labor yet?? Get this child out of me!”

Week Forty-Two:

“Crap. I’m just gonna be pregnant forever, huh? …oh crap. I think my water just broke.”

The usual questions:

Morning sickness:

So, morning sickness isn’t puking all the time. In fact if you’re puking more than once a day it’s a serious medical condition called hyperemesis gravidarum and sometimes requires medication

More commonly it’s a general sense of not feeling well, followed by brief but dramatic puking. Honestly, the closest analogy is really bad food poisoning when you can feel the puke coming, but it hasn’t come yet

During the morning sickness phase, you HAVE to eat. Not eating makes it so much worse, so it helps if you set a strict schedule of eating a snack or a small meal every two hours you’re awake, and as soon as you wake and right before bed. Apple sauce good. Doesn’t suck coming back up. Same with most soups. Avoid spicy, acids, and crunchy stuff. They’re all miserable coming back. Drink a LOT of water.

Scents will be a problem. Your sense of smell goes haywire and cranks up to 11. I’m practically noseblind and I could smell the apples in my kitchen from across the house. Normally this would be fun. During morning sickness, it means fun new ways to puke in exciting places. The smell difference between being inside and going outside is sometimes enough, and any of your trigger scents or flavors will get you reliably. Scented products are a hard no. Pack them away for now. You’ll want them later.

The hard part is that doing anything strenuous, like hanging out with friends or going to the grocery store, will make it worse for the days following. The exhaustion compounds. You absolutely can’t borrow from tomorrow’s spoons and trying to push yourself will just lead to being even worse off the next day. You HAVE to rest. It’s not optional and your body will enforce it on you.

It does help to get an essential oil you like and wear it in a diffuser. I used lavender, but any smell you like and which doesn’t smell like death to you will work. Make sure it isn’t touching skin. A lot of oils are caustic, and some are toxic.

Other than that, just try to ride it out. It doesn’t last.

Body changes:

It starts out slow and then lingers. You’ll feel like you should be showing way before you are, but once you hit your second trimester, it’s very obvious you’re pregnant, and one you hit the third trimester they can probably see you from space. You waddle. Your coordination goes down the tubes, you’re hot all the time, thirsty and hungry all the time, and exhausted a lot of the time.

You will also stink. Your BO will spike with your hormones and unfortunately, you will absolutely not want to bathe until the third trimester, when you want to be in the water all the time.

Your hair will, however, be awesome. Preggo hair is a thing. So is post-partum shedding, so be ready to shed more than three long-hair cats. It’s a thing. Unfortunately this does include your body hair, which will grow fast and thick. If it bothers you, you’re gonna be shaving a lot.

Here’s where it gets TMI, but if you’re writing a pregnant character or you’re pregnant/want to get pregnant yourself, you gotta know. There will be itching. You will not be able to shave your undercarriage at all after a certain point, so if it matters that much, you’ll need help. Your cooch will also smell different. Weird, but there it is.

Being in water helps immensely I spent a lot of my pregnancy in the bath and I strongly credit that for helping to support my back and ribs, which were not thrilled about the temporary tenant. It also helps with the ‘ugh I’m heavy’ complaint. Spend as much time in the water as you can, but remember not to let it get more than 100 degrees, or you can put Baby and yourself at risk. You have a lot more blood in your body right now. That makes for certain issues, such as fainting.

You will feel heavy. This is most notable during the third trimester, but when it becomes a problem, it really becomes a problem.

This is a problem because the only pain killer you’re allowed is Tylenol, and not much of that. If you’re in screaming pain, you can go totally hospital but they probably won’t give you anything for it. There’s a serious risk to your baby; and while they won’t prioritize the baby over you, you’re the one who is driving the bus, so they’re gonna make you obey the metaphorical traffic laws.

Labor:

Game day. You’ve been waiting for this for nine months and thank anything holy it’s finally here.

It starts as little flutters that kind of feel like gas, and you’ll probably be farting a fair bit anyway because you have a baby squishing your organs in every direction. After a while, it’ll start to feel more like cramping, and that’s when you know it’s game day. You start timing them at that point, and here’s where Hollywood starts messing up.

Labor is slow.

I was contracting for about ten hours before my water broke. If you’re pregnant, buy the adult diapers. Just do it. Put them on as soon as you realize you’re in labor. What comes out of you when your water breaks is foul. It’s not water. It’s slime, and it’s stinky. Sometimes it’s brown. It’s never something you want on anything you’re planning to keep. The diaper will contain it and you will be GLAD.

So ten hours in, my water broke. This is the sign that it’s not false labor. You’re ready to rock and roll.

This is also where my story differs from most.

Generally, when your water breaks, you’re about ten hours from pushing. Those ten hours will suck, but the nurses are mostly really nice and you can kick the mean ones out without repercussion. If you don’t vibe with one, switch tjem out. You don’t have to keep a nurse you don’t like.

The contractions will get stronger and they will get more painful. The nurses will call them “intense”. That’s bullcrap. It hurts. If you want medication, you have options. Ask for them freely and without shame.

Pushing is kind of a blur. You’ll be on so many endorphins and probably an epidural, that you’ll be in a haze. You push with the contractions for best effect. You’re gonna poop. This is good. Means you’re pushing right. You absolutely will not care in the moment.

It will feel like it’s not progressing at all, but your support people are gonna be on the ball and they’ll give you updates. If you have an epidural, it helps. If not, breathe through it and ride the endorphins. The worst part is when the head isn’t entirely through the cervix and everything is stretching a whole lot. Once the head is in the channel and you’re making progress, it gets easier.

It still hurts a whole lot, even with the meds, but you honestly won’t care because your whole body is designed to do this thing, and it’s GONNA do it at this point, whether you want to or not.

As soon as the head is out, the rest of the baby follows, and it sort of feels like you’ve been gutted. Things because you pretty much have. Birthing the placenta is entirely secondary to your tiny new baby and getting sewn up if you tear is uncomfortable, but after everything else, pretty negligible. Also, new baby!

Afterwards:

So, postpartum recovery sucks. All those endorphins are gone, you’re no longer on pain meds, and you just squeezed a baby through your cooch. You probably have stitches, and everything hurts. Walking is hard and without help, it’s also dangerous. You’re a fall risk. Do not try to hold your baby and walk at the same time unless you absolutely must. That’s what your birth support person is for. If you don’t have one, they’ll provide one.

Peeing hurts. Pooping is worse. You will be passing blood clots and your underwear (remember, get the adult diapers. They’re way better) will look like that scene from The Shining with the blood tsunami. This is all normal but it’s pretty horrifying.

They will give you various products to help with recovery. Some work better than others. Use all of them. The compound effects help.

It will be about three weeks before you feel like you can pee without it hurting. It’ll be closer to six before you can poop without worrying. Either way, there will be some major changes to your squishy parts.

Me specifically:

Remember how I mentioned my story was different? Yeah. So I was in labor for 62 hours, and pushed for five of those before my daughter was born.

For most of it, it was just waiting for my body to get into gear, and then when I wasn’t progressing, for the pitocin to kick in. I didn’t want to be on pitocin, but I wasn’t going to risk my baby, and labor that long comes with some real risks to mother and baby.

I did have both fentanyl (which for reasons of my messed up biology doesn’t affect me at all) and an epidural, which did help, but was hindered by my scoliosis. (Having a curve in your spine makes it hard to put the needle in the right place).

I could have had a c section, but I was very against it and since we were doing okay, despite it taking a long time, they let me have a vaginal birth.

This is not normal and is a product of my messed up biology. Your experience may differ.

Breastfeeding:

Okay babies do not come out of the uterus knowing how to do this. They’re really bad at latching at first and it will take a few tries to get them to latch. Even then, if they have a high palate or a tongue tie, they may struggle to latch.

Even so, breastfeeding really is an incredible feeling of knowing nature built you so right that you can keep your whole baby alive with just what your body makes for them.

This can make breastfeeding hard, and even if they have a good latch, it kind of sucks for a while as your nipples get used to nursing and your milk comes in. You’ll produce colostrum for the first few days, and that will slowly turn to milk over a week or so.

Baby will need to eat basically every hour for the first few weeks, then every two hours, but in greater amounts. As they get better at feeding, it gets easier, but there’s no shame in using formula as a support for your milk. The goal is to keep the baby alive.

Once you’re both used to it, you can even nap pretty well while you feed, especially once you’re in bed. Just make sure there’s absolutely no risk of dropping or rolling on top of the baby.

Your Baby:

Here’s the good part. Babies are awesome! They’re cute, they’re fun, and they’re deeply entertaining to mess with. Make sure you have a basket of toys for your baby, and let the good times roll, even when things are hard. They’ll only be this small once, The tiny baby clothes feel too small until you put them on. I’m keeping all of mine. I don’t know what I’ll use them for, but they’re too cute to get rid of.

[stelladess]

So I was writing a thing comparing Ch´en´s character arc in the anime and in the game, and how various changes alter things. Problem is I got writer´s block on it and cannot figure out how to make it written in a way that is interesting to read. So not sure if ill ever get that one done but for now there is an aspect to her relationship with Amiya that I wish to highlight that I have not seen pointed out much really.

I originally wrote several paragraphs going over Ch´en´s relationship to her uncle and her unnamed father and also on Wei Yenwu´s personality and background. But it was kind of getting away from the point. So the important thing here is that Ch´en´s father would be aggressive, yelling and demeaning towards her or ignore her. While Wei Yenwu was very emotionally distant on purpose and would generally not acknowledge any of her successes, just point out her shortcomings or try to make her see how naive she was and to become more of a ruthless pragmatist. Just know that Wei Yenwu is a deeper character and was until they suddenly dropped him as a villain one of the most interesting villains in the game to me.

So the interesting thing here is, pre character development Ch´en treats Amiya like her father figures treated her. Which I find interesting for multiple reasons, one is that after we find out from Hoshiguma that Ch´en actually likes Amiya and keeps praising her in private, it makes a lot of sense. Ch´en is clearly trying to teach Amiya, so she defaults to (especially Wei Yenwu´s) teaching methods. Which to Amiya just comes across as Ch´en being a massive jerk for no good reason. And when Ch´en´s patience runs thin she lashes out in anger.

The second reason is that she defaults to her male parental figures methods. Not her significantly nicer aunt for example. I think one could read that in multiple ways, maybe she just thinks of Wei Yenwu as more of a "teacher" type, maybe she just has been influenced more by his thinking, maybe she identifies more with traditionally male roles or behaviours (whether you see this in a trans reading or not both are valid readings imo, I am planning to write something about gender on Terra because I disagree with the "Terra is fully egalitarian" takes that come up sometimes). Either way it is interesting that she specifically emulates her uncle especially, and on a more subconscious level her father.

That said, Ch´en does start growing out of this fairly early on, as early as chapter 3. Where she actually tries to comfort Amiya somewhat after Misha´s death. She gives her advice that while harsh, still expresses support for Amiya´s ideals and she clearly hopes Amiya will be able to succeed. She is just unsure it is possible. I think this is also an interesting layer to their dynamic, that Ch´en believes Amiya is like her own younger more naive self and needs to see the cold harsh reality. Both failing to realize she herself has grown overly cynical and that Amiya already *knows* life sucks, something Ch´en seems to only really fully grasp in chapter 5, around when Hoshiguma points out to her it is unlikely Amiya, as an infected child soldier, has done something so simple as gone shopping around town. This is why Ch´en inviting Amiya to just... go out to eat somewhere nice after things have settled down matters a lot. It shows how Ch´en is becoming a more considerate person. She is growing out of her uncle´s abusive teaching methods.

She is not only trying to teach Amiya knowledge she needs, but also caring about her mental wellbeing.

What I am saying is that Wei Yenwu and Ch´en (no personal name given) are examples of toxic masculinity and Ch´en Hui-Chieh grows into an example of positive masculinity. /s

No but in all seriousness, she is trying to work her own issues out while helping the people around her and figure out what justice even is while also making an active effort to be a kinder, more considerate person who does not try to force her own ideas about how a leader should behave on anyone anymore.

Also to be clear I am not saying "add Ch´en to the ever growing list of mom´s for Amiya", I think Ch´en has a dynamic more comparable to Blaze or Wis´adel with Amiya. I am saying her attempts at teaching someone something has her defaulting to the teaching methods of her uncle, who is a terrible teacher. And how this is important because we very directly see Ch´en growing to be better then her uncle. Since Wei Yenwu when accounting for his backstory is also kind of a fallen hero it is nice to see Ch´en climb her way out of the hole her cynicism had dug her and work to improve herself, and I think her relationship with Amiya is a surprisingly underrated part of that.

[roughribo]

How to do waxwriting play:

I've always loved waxplay, as a sadist I get a lot of joy out of watching my partner squirm in pain. But as a writer I've always had lots of fun playing around with the idea of bodywriting kink and using my partner's body as my writing canvas. One day several years ago I decided to combine my interests in waxplay and bodywriting and not only were the results stunning, but it was surprisingly easy to do. I've searched for it online, I've been to kink events, but I've never seen anyone mention it. It kind of feels like I just invented a new kink in a way.

The result is what I call "waxwriting," an activity that combines the fun of writing on someone with the sadomasochism of hot wax.

The supplies:

Waxplay candles (soy preferred, paraffin not recommended)

A set of kid's watercolor paint brushes

Electric wax warmer (or way to heat and control temperature of the wax without an open flame)

Thermometer

Towel/paper towels for brush cleanup

Safety rant:

The most important thing about this is having a way to have a sustained small pool of melted wax at a SAFE and controlled temperature. I achieved this by using soy waxplay candles and a wax warmer that I normally used to make my home smell good.

However, this is a big important point I want to make, do NOT assume that a wax warmer will heat your wax to a safe temperature. While most warmers fall in that range, please take temperature measurements by using water and a thermometer in the saucer of the wax warmer and practice the actual technique with caution before ever trying this on a live person.

Temperatures near and above 150 Fahrenheit (65 Celsius) are unsafe and are likely to blister and burn the skin but even before that point, some people find temperature play above 130 Fahrenheit (54 Celsius) to be a hard limit, so have a talk with your sub about preferences or run a "sexperiment", a nonsexual play session dedicated to playing out a high risk scene ahead of time to figure out the logistics of the scene and the limits of the people playing in the scene. Being able to do a dry run of a scene beforehand can give you invaluable information for how to conduct future play. And no it doesn't lessen the magic of the actual scene late on.

Some logistics:

Okay safety tangent over. For now. Since soy wax has a lower melting point of roughly 113-127 degrees Fahrenheit (45-54 degrees Celsius), it sits firmly in the middle of the temperature range that most commercially available home wax warmers tend to heat up to of 100-150 degrees Fahrenheit (38-65 degrees Celsius). For reference, my wax warmer averaged 130 Fahrenheit (54 Celsius)

I had less luck with paraffin wax candles because they had a higher melting point of around 115-142 degrees Fahrenheit (46-61 degrees Celsius) but also tended to cool quicker making them unsuitable for transferring to the skin via the paintbrush because the paraffin wax would just harden on the brush before I could write with it.

Soy wax actually retained heat long enough for me to write strokes across my skin while still being that sadistic pleasurable temperature. Because the thermal conduction of paraffin wax is greater than that of soy wax I recommend using soy wax candles for this activity, as the retention of heat is crucial for actually writing on your submissive.

The actual tutorial:

The actual technique is fairly simple. Put your wax into the wax warmer now that you have established the wax warmer heats to a safe temperature (I had to cut the candle with a butterknife and remove the wick). Heat your wax using your wax warmer and let it become liquid. Grab a smaller brush from your kit, I found that flat brushes with a width of 4mm to 6mm produced the best results, but you could go bigger if you wanted, there are just certain downsides I will discuss later.

Dip your paintbrush in the liquid wax and get it thoroughly soaked in wax. The next part is the simplest part to understand but hardest to master. The moment you remove your brush from the wax, it will start to cool, so it's important that the distance between your wax warmer and the body you're writing on is close and you must get a feel for the timing between soaking the paintbrush and applying it to the submissive that gives your submissive that "almost too warm" sensation and not be too hot or too cold. For me in my experiments, this was roughly a second.

Do not press into the skin, or else you will deposit all of the wax at once. Run the head of the brush over the skin and the wax will come off naturally before it starts to get too cool to apply to the skin, or roughly 3-4 seconds, in my experience. Depending on how fast you write this could be roughly anywhere from 2-5 letters per dip of the brush.

Which brings me to my first con of this activity. Unlike just dripping or pouring wax over someone's body, waxwriting has these frequent pauses while reapplying wax to the brush. I personally am not bothered by this, but know that it may be inconvenient for others.

The next con is this: the wider the brush the more dipping you need to do and your wax gets used up quicker because of the size of the lettering you need to do. Keeping your brushes and letters smaller tended to let me write more efficiently with letters roughly an inch in size. But if you want to write "SLUT" in huge broad strokes to embarrass your sub, by all means, grab a larger brush, just keep an eye on the wax you have available so you don't wind up with just "SLU" before you run out of wax.

The third con is that you may need to take breaks to heat up more wax. As I only had the one wax warmer I occasionally needed to stop to heat more wax. I found when using the smaller flat brushes the wax will actually last for a while. The smaller the brush you go, the longer you can write on someone for before needing to refill.

The final con is cleanup because it's very clear these paintbrushes will not last forever, and wax is even harder to clean out of the bristles than paint. Running it under hot water and taking a paper towel to them helped, however, somebody could always butt in and tell me I'm doing this wrong and there's an easier way to remove wax from bristles I'm just not familiar with.

Public Service Sub Announcement:

Has your sub drank water today? Make them. More news at 11.

In conclusion:

Be safe and happy waxwriting. Feel free to share any results in a reblog or tag. It's a fun way to introduce pain into bodywriting kink that feels very intimate and has the added bonus of being very photogenic.

I've been wanting to share this knowledge for a while ever since I discovered it years and years ago. I recently came across my documentation for the initial experiments and decided to present everything here on tumblr and share my findings. It's definitely a niche activity but I think it has so much potential for a BDSM date night, a kinky photoshoot, or maybe even as an activity at your local dungeon.

[justinspoliticalcorner]

Jess Piper at The View from Rural Missouri:

“If you’re not at the table, then you're probably on the menu.” ~Ann Richards A few days ago, I had some thoughts on churches. I read a post about a local church in St Joseph, Missouri and its activities during the holiday season. This specific church has been meddling in local politics for years and I started thinking about their tax-exempt status. After I called the church to check on their activities in helping others in the community, I realized that they were not helping in their community other than offering up their congregants as free labor to other organizations who help in the community.

Churches are tax-exempt because they offer services that local government can’t or won’t. Food pantries. Free clothing closets. Help with natural disasters. This church is doing none of that except sending their members to serve in ministries provided by other non-profits. They keep their tax-free tithes for themselves. After researching, I wrote this post on Blue Sky: This post did fairly well for Blue Sky. It’s not Twitter viral, but still pretty good. I am a creator. A writer. I am also constantly plagiarized. You might be surprised by who is lifting my intellectual property. It’s the massive “progressive” accounts who steal from small authors like myself. It’s “Feminist News” or “Occupy Democrats” or “The Other 98%” who take the ideas and thoughts and writing of progressives like me. They do it so often that readers and followers don’t even notice.

But I do. They have taken my words — word for word — too often. They do it regularly. Just go look at the pages of these huge accounts. They turn the writings of others into meme form and post online with zero attribution. A friend sent me the above screenshot. “Feminist News” ripped off my quote about churches word for word without attribution. They have nearly 2 million followers on Facebook alone. I asked them to cite me and it took dozens of others in their comments for them to edit their post and add my name. But, they didn’t add my name to the meme — it is still being shared thousands of times without a citation. This happens frequently, but what really sticks in my craw is that this is a progressive account that claims to back feminism, yet they lift the words of progressive women creators with alarming regularity. I have people tell me that “it doesn’t matter who the messenger is, but that the message is getting out.”

[...]

Where are the women? What is going on? Do we honestly think women won’t be involved in the writing and creation of bills and laws and committee work? Of course they will. Will they receive credit for their work? Likely not — they will be behind the scenes writing the questions and statements and legislation for committee men. Their work will be taken and used by the men acting as committee chairs. Women, even women lawmakers, have been pushed behind the scenes. This makes it difficult to put women’s issues front and center.

We are being pushed back into the shadows. Behind the curtain. And if the Republicans have anything to do with it, probably behind the veil. Let’s not forget that the Equal Rights Amendment (ERA) was passed by Congress in 1972, but it has not yet been ratified and is not part of the U.S. Constitution. The ERA has been reintroduced in every session of Congress since 1982, but it has not been ratified. It’s time to ratify the ERA. It’s time to stand with women and make sure we are represented and legally protected in all facets of life including government. Especially in times like these. It is also time for women to demand equal pay for equal work. It is time to demand citations and attributions and a seat at the table. It is time for us to stand up for ourselves and the young women coming behind us. Our work is often co-opted and it’s time we demand better. Cite us. Pay us.

Jess Piper delivering an important message that it’s important to credit a person’s work. Also, it’s time to ratify the ERA.

[gffa]

The latest ending of Ahsoka really made me realize one of the big problems with Felony's writing and why so much of the Masndo-verse and Felony's modern writing falls flat compared to OWK and Andor. Shock value. A BIG twist cliffhanger that leaves us all mouth open and HYPING up the next episode in hope and filling the forums with discussions in anticipation. Understandably, he can't write what we wrote in our heads for 7 days and top that. 1.

2. But once that shock is gone when the story has moved onto the next big thing, or you watch it again when you know what it pays off in, or watch the whole series or season again, it just doesn't hold up. It's empty. Vapid. Because it's all about the shock. The twist. The discussion. The hype fodder. It's not saying anything or adding anything. OWK and Andor was a lot better at that, without the use of the nostalgia baiting that Felony relies on. 3. It becomes an endless circle of low lows and high highs, while OWK and Andor both slowly built up to the crescendo of discussions and speculations and both have stayed in the fandom consciousness alot longer thanks to that. And because they have something to say, both to the world and to the viewer. While with the Felony and the Fraudrou verses, it's just a constant barrage of oh wow, moving on, what's next? ehh, it's over, let's move on.

I feel like one day I'm going to do a longer analysis on why exactly Filoni's writing feels weak to me (where I try to be more fair than I'm usually feeling about his writing), because I don't think he's without a lot of talent and there's certain things he really does get about Star Wars, but I think so much comes back to that he's a writer who is caught in a difficult position--playing in someone else's sandbox but has to now establish his own new corners of that sandbox and I'm not sure he's strong enough to be a big picture kind of guy when he works better in smaller focus. His work on TCW and Rebels is content that we do come back to again and again for analysis, during my rewatches of both those series, those shows hold up! But I think they're ones where he had stronger guardrails up, and he was forced to stick to things in one place. I think live action has been bad for Filoni's writing because of the way so much is structured, that there are multiple series going on and I feel like his writing doesn't have the patience to actually tell a story in a single space, that's why we get Grogu's story being split between The Mandalorian and The Book of Boba Fett, that's why we get Mandalore's story being splintered across Rebels, The Mandalorian, The Book of Boba Fett, and now Ahsoka. We still haven't even seen half of the events that happen in the Mandalore bigger story! And you're right that he and Favreau both lean too hard on the cameos and echoes/rhymes for nostalgia's sake. And those reference points are often extremely fun in the moment! And I'll grant that the Luke episodes are ones I go back to fairly often, because I think there's some really good content in there about what attachment actually means. But I don't think it's that surprising, looking back, how quickly the Favroni shows fell apart for us and how it doesn't feel like they're establishing anything that can support a bunch of books and comics. I suspect that Disney's not allowed to have books/comics/etc. based on Favroni's shows because they want creative control over those characters while they're still actively writing for them, but also I look at the OT and the PT and look how much was built off those movies+TCW as a foundation, I look at how much you're able to still watch those and find new things to analyze, and I just don't feel that with Filoni's writing anymore, not since Rebels, not to that level, anyway. (I'll grant that I've been a lot more excited about the Ahsoka series and what we can say about it/find in analyzing it than I expected, I expected nothing but shitposts like we did with Mandalorian s3, but I've had fun with serious meta in Ahsoka! I was genuinely excited to come on-line after episode 4 and talk about themes and structure and how well Filoni did with that there!) Ultimately, I think Filoni (and Favreau) both have a lot of talent, but I think they're being pushed too hard to make too much too quickly and that it shows that they're making this up as they go along, rather than that they had a vision they've been crafting for years and any kind of idea of where they want the end goal to be. Like, yeah, Lucas wrote some stuff on the fly, he changed his mind about things along the way, but he had an end point in mind for his story, so the echoes/rhymes felt more resonant for me. Favroni don't feel like they have any idea where they're going and so much winds up feeling like shock value and self-reference for nostalgia bad for me instead of something that's Going Somewhere.

[nitholites]

Chloé Bourgeois/Cassandra Cain (possible/Stephanie Brown), anyone?

basically, i got to thinking. it's been years since i've watched anything mlb, and i can't claim to be super knowledgeable about dc, but.

Cass deserves more love. so here we are

Important notes: i'm takin chloé away from canon post 'miracle queen' but pre 'throw all possible character development out the window'. i'm also letting her have her dang character redemption arc because goddamn it she was 13 at the start of the show. she isn't evil; she's young, sheltered, and struggling with a lot of parental issues. i don't know shit about anything past, like... the season of chat blanc, and nor do i care to know! canon's a washed out blueprint, but in the end it's just a piece of paper i'm gonna doodle all over anyway so may as well make it my own

as for Cass (and any other dc character imma poke at); i'm doin my best, but i'm very new to dc and its timelines are messes anyway. so im basically taking the webtoon batman: wayne family adventures as canon (for characterizations and interpersonal relationships) and giving it the mlb treatment because It's My Story And I Can Do What I Want, Mom

Have a problem with all that? Write your own fic! Then you can decide what interpretations of these characters you use! (And i get to consume more for this idea-)

For example! A great prompt (in my head) would be to take post-canon chloé (her working with hawkmoth and all), have her move to gotham for school/to get away from paris/whatever, and let her try to have her redemption arc there of all places. (Or that's just where she went because she's in a downward spiral and thinks along the lines of 'well, if im already evil might as well go to the crime capital of the world, right?) Or! Have cass be in paris! Pre or post joining the batfam; you could have hawkmoth be kickin years after canon starts

We're talkin about chloé goin to gotham today tho. What specifically she's doing is up for the writer to decide- if she's goin the fashion route, if she's starting from scratch, if she's planning on just visiting, whatever. Point is: she's in gotham long enough to have a story

Now, chloé isn't actually evil- no matter what her mental image of herself is. And in this story, she's actively trying to do better; to be a better person. She's still snarky and blunt and has high standards, ofc, but she's trying and she is doing better day by day. She falls back on old habits and defense mechanisms sometimes (especially when facing gotham's rogues, which probably happens fairly often considering who she is and the amount of money in her bank accounts) and she definitely isn't a saint or endlessly kind/patient(/good) like marinette is, but don't actions speak louder than words anyway?

For some people, they do!

Enter: one cassandra cain. Who knows real evil when she sees it. Who can see the struggle and improvement of another person so clearly they may as well have shout it from the rooftops. Who can see the emotions as clearly as she can see gargoyles in gotham, and who had her own sort of redemption arc/gear-shift into being on the other side of the hero/villain debacle

Few people in the world can so clearly see or know another person, and cass is very good at what she does.

So what cass sees isn't a selfish, spoiled, bully. No; she sees the guilt that gnaws away at chloe and shuts her mouth when she's about to really snap at someone (until they push more and she can't stop the words but she can take the full brunt of their anger). Cass can see the hesitation that comes when chloe has the opportunity to do something small but kind (like hold open a door or help someone pick up something) and the brief (but strong) flash of why can't i do better why do i hesitate why is this so hard that comes when chloe just isn't fast enough to go through with it before the chance is over

Cass can see chloe's intent and the constant battle she wages with herself between doing the right thing and falling back into the easy, (comforting, even if it's only for a moment and the pang of regret she has after, she can only shove onto the mountain of her fuck-ups) familiar, knee-jerk actions and reactions and thoughts. And yknow what?

Cass was like that once, too. Because she still brandishes a knife first when she's truly startled. Because her mind still whispers when she's got an opponent down, telling her exactly how easy it'd be to make sure they never get back up. Because change is a process, and cass has seen both ups and downs in both herself, her family, and even some of the rogues and criminals she sees on a semi-regular basis. And it's so much harder when you have to do it alone. And a vigilante's job is to help people, first and foremost. And cass hasn't been able to do that in all the ways she wants to yet

Cass usually doesn't interact with civilians when she doesn't have to. She doesn't speak often and sign isn't as widely taught as it should be. But cass can see chloe's strong-willed, determined nature. And yknow what?

It reminds her a lot of steph. Chloé's a 'they asked for no pickles' friend without someone to stand in front of. Cass doesn't mind pickles, but she'd be more than happy to let someone else stand up for her from time to time. It's a win-win in her book; chloe gets a clearer path to 'goodness', and cass gets practice at helping people! (It doesn't matter that it's outside the mask. It's helping, and she can do it no matter what name she's using)

Chloé can't help but see a younger, meeker marinette in cass at first. Though she's lost in how to be good in most ways, all she has to do to be better here is to treat this shy girl the opposite of how she treated marinette. Not easy- not really- but at least she knows she's on the right track every day this cass doesn't cry or get that same broken expression marinette sometimes got when they were kids

(... she's entirely unprepared for Cass to break a molester's wrist a couple of months later. Maybe cass doesn't need chloe, but cass seems happy to let chloe stay, so she will)

(God help everyone else when chloe and steph finally meet.)

[jessconsumesmedia]

Did you think having Hetty forgive Elias was a good move? It feels like this show forgets that Elias straight up abused her for years and it just doesn't sit right that all her friends pressured her into forgiving the man who made her life a waking nightmare

First off thank you I have so many thoughts on this specific instance lol. (Also I am so sorry this was meant to be short but then it turned into a large character analysis thing)

First there is a Network Television side that I can believe - While ghosts can and has hit really depressing beats and manages to tug at your heartstrings, it is at its core a comedy show. There are things that it is hard to make comedy around (abuse being one) I am sure there are ways to do it that are not only respectful but also actually funny, they could have just decided suggesting past pain over blatantly stating it would work better for the episode. It could also be something that might come up later we kinda don’t really know. I am hoping they go more into Hetty and Elias’ relationship in the next episode that he shows up in. I believe they have the ability to hit it on the money but I am not even a writer so again what do I know about writing a comedy? All of this is just assumption based off plausible network television dynamic lol so grain of salt.

Character reasons - I also believe that there are multiple incredibly nuanced reasons that the other ghosts could have wanted to push Hetty towards forgiveness. They all have very interesting motives in that episode and I am always going to go way overboard on analyzing.

Pete - Of course his immediate reason would be the fact that he doesn't want to go to hell. Which is fair but it also leads to him pushing for Hetty to forgive Elias which is generally bleh. I could see, coming from the fact that as one of the younger ghosts he didn't observe that abuse from Elias, he just didn't think about it. That fear clouded the part of his brain that cares about his friends and it turned into a do or die situation. He is only thinking about himself in that moment and yea it isn't the sweet little Pete we like to think of but it definitely makes his character rounder and more layered.

Alberta - She is also coming from a place where she didn't actually See how terrible Elias was in life. She is also used to backstabbing personalities from back when she was alive so her bringing up that the men who suck just don't care. She is on Hetty's side by helping her forgive, because genuinely she believes it would be good for Hetty. And the act of not letting it simmer because it effects her more than him is undeniably true. She is the one who cares and either way Elias gets something out of the deal so in the long run it probably was the better option just for Pete's sake(funny haha) I don't believe it is meant to completely diminish what Hetty went through with Elias, it was just meant to be a way for her to lose some of that weight off of her shoulders.

It also leaves open the fact that Hetty is essentially forgiving Elias for things that she probably hasn't even unpacked. Up until fairly recently she didn't even know women could orgasm! She has and is still learning a lot about equality and how that goes along with her past. Which leaves opportunity for the next Elias episode honestly. If they go down the route of digging into their past a little more it would be really interesting to see more of the actual dynamic.

I don't know a possible motive for people like Thor and Issac to be honest. But they also aren't actively pushing like Alberta and Pete, so they might just not want to be apart of the kerfuffle or maybe even it's an instance of them knowing things that they have decided to keep a secret. Issac does make sure that the whole contract is looked over just incase which shows he cares enough to make sure (and knows Elias is a piece of shit and probably is ready to cause trouble)

There are so many possible explanations and I am speaking from a hyper analytical perspective lol! But I hope that explains my thoughts on that sitch. I really hope that they revisit some of Hetty's past and her traumas.

-Jess o_O

[voxofthevoid]

Hello! We haven't really interacted before but I reviewed a Bleach fanfiction of yours a while ago, and I've loved your stories for the fandom! I'm sad that you no longer write for Bleach, but you've shared some amazing work, so thank you for that.

Just wanted to ask if you have any tips on how to connect more with other readers and writers, as it seems your conversations with other people in your fandoms bring a lot of joy and inspiration! While I wrote fanfiction in my teenage years, I felt very much like a fandom hermit back then but I'm coming back to it now many years later and want to actively engage with more people. I've joined some discord servers and am posting much more to twitter and tumblr, but I'm still pretty shy about messaging people privately as I feel like I don't really know what to say. I know it will take time, but any advice on how to get the ball rolling would be much appreciated.

Good luck with the writing!

Hi! I'm very glad you like my Bleach fics, and hey, being missed isn't a bad thing either ❤

(I do have one 80%–finished grimmichi fic that I'll put up on Ao3 soon-ish. The last chapter won't ever be written, but there's still some 28k of fluff and porn that ends on a fairly conclusive note on the emotional end.)

You're right that interacting with my fellow fans is a large part of what makes fandom fun for me. The community aspect of fandom is something that comes up a lot in conversations about why people flock to fandom, why they stay, and why they leave, and although I'm an introvert bordering on a hermit, the social aspects of fandom are its greatest draw. I write because I need to or I'll burst, but I share for the people here with me. That's not an uncommon attitude or experience. YMMV, but many of us want to connect with people who share our interests, and the level of creativity and commitment fandom inspires often thrives in collaboration and community.

How to get that sense of community is a trickier matter though. You're already in Discord servers, which seems to be the main fandom social space(s) these days. You're also on social media platforms where people can reach out to you or vice versa. So that's the basics covered. After that, it's largely a matter of organically developing relationships. But I do understand the hesitance to just roll up into someone's DMs; even though I have no issues with people popping up in my DMs, I also find it harder to initiate.

Plus, I've found that some sort of existing rapport gives you a better foundation when you do take the step into private exchanges. This can be Ao3 comment sections, Tumblr notes, or Discord group chat spaces. I tend to avoid Discord servers these days, but back when I had more tolerance for group chats, the people I met there often became closer friends. Mostly though, my pocket friends are people I met via Ao3 and, less frequently, Tumblr—fellow authors and readers in a specific fandom.

I know my regulars, here and on Ao3, and I've been a regular many times. Discussions in comments usually start out limited to the specific fic, but they can also include general fandom/canon stuff or even personal talk. Many times, you build a degree of familiarity with a person that way, and if the conversation moves to more private channels, you already have a shared base to build further conversation on.

So my best advice to find friends and like-minded fandom folks is to be active in Ao3 comments and Tumblr notes (...and whatever the corresponding thing is over on Xitter):

Reply to the comments on your stories and try to really engage with what your readers are saying. This is very much a personal preference, but the reason I try to reply with more than a generic "thanks" for longer, more in-depth comments is that, like I said above, nerding out with fellow fans is a huge part of why I love fandom. If people are already expressing interest in your story and you have a shared interest in canon, there's a lot of room there for fun conversations, even if they never go beyond one-off exchanges.

Comment on stories you like, and if you find specific authors you really love, let them know without reservations what you like about their takes and why you like them. One of my favorite commenting methods when I'm well and truly in love with something is to read everything once, then reread and leave longass comments on every chapter/fic. It's time-intensive, but I've never seen the effort go unappreciated. I've also been on the receiving end of this many times, and that's how several of my fandom friendships were born; one of my closest friends is someone I virtually kidnapped because I loved their tags on my JJK fic posts so much.

The above habits can be applied to Tumblr/Twitter too. Plus, there are plenty of people on such sites who engage deeply with fandom outside of fic writing. Be loud and proud about what you love. Sending a DM is an intimidating step, and not everyone will be receptive anyway, but most people welcome encouragement and appreciation. There are a lot of people I'm friendly with and fond of whom I've never interacted with directly, only via Tumble notes or asks.

I think all of this narrows down to being pretty generous when it comes to expressing your love for fandom and fellow fans. Won't always work out for various reasons, but as long as you're having fun, it's not wasted effort or time.

[darkrpfinders]

🥩💖 Hello‼️ I’m a 23yo trans dude looking for 18+ writers for some LONG TERM dead dove/super dark fandom roleplays, specifically Invincible, The Boys, and Cookie Run.

I tend to trans some dude’s genders, which is nonnegotiable!

I really want to have gore, cannibalism, eroguro + snuff, and power imbalances in the roleplay, but obviously, I can adjust accordingly (only regular gore is nonnegotiable for me, sorry). Other things I dig are yandere (although I heavily prefer that the characters are both crazy for each other), dubcon and noncon. All can be discussed later.

I am semi to advanced lit, and I would like my partners to be around the same range. Quality over quantity for me! ALSO, it’s okay if it takes weeks or even months for a partner to reply, as I still will be interested even in their absence. I just need a heads up first.

If you don’t care for the roleplay anymore or lost your muse or something else, I would heavily appreciate it if you’d tell me before leaving. Communication is key.

Smut is a must, but don’t let that think that it will be the only thing happening in the roleplay. I LOVE narratively driven stories, and I write my replies as such (roleplaying multiple characters in a scene is second nature to me and I really don’t mind it, so don’t feel too pressured to mirror me there). For the plots I have in mind, most will have several story arcs, and usually an end goal, but this can all be talked about and discussed!

I prefer wacky AUs to canon divergence, as I love worldbuilding and seeing where everyone would fit inside it. Canon divergence isn’t completely off the table though; I just have a preference. I am in LOVE with the concept of cakeverse and I really want to add those types of elements into the rp, though!

OOC chatter is a MUST, though. I LOVE talking about the rp and how it’s going. I may even draw some stuff too if I’m enjoying it a lot (for some pairings here I will draw ideas/concepts if I think it will help get whatever point across). I want to make friends, not just roleplay like it’s a job.

Now, onto the pairings - highlighted characters are the ones I prefer to muse and italicized characters take higher priority than those that aren’t. If they are both highlighted, then I’m comfortable with either or (some of my top/bot dynamics are not fixed, but my dom/sub dynamics are, just a heads up).

Invincible

Mark Grayson x William Clockwell

•one of my favorite pairings. I’ve been playing around with the idea/AU of an evil/morally dark grey Mark who is a pure-blooded Viltrumite (Debbie is a Viltrumite here) arriving to Earth for the first time with Nolan and Debbie. He meets and saves William his first week on Earth and.. it goes from there.

Mark Grayson x ..Mark Grayson

•Selfcest is so, so good actually - Evil Mark x Good Mark! They get trapped in a dimension together thanks to Angstrom and have to find their way back to their own timelines, but not without fighting first, of course.

Invincible/The Boys

Omni-Man x Homelander

•Another favorite pairing of mine. I have a few plots in mind that are not canon divergent at all (mainly a space pirate au where Homelander is actively getting hunted for various crimes, but I also really like the idea of the two meeting in an MK1 tournament!), but again, everything can be discussed. All I ask for is that Homelander gets manipulated like hell 💖

The Boys

Homelander x Billy Butcher

•I’m still fairly new to this ship (and The Boys parings in general), but I really love their dynamic. There’s no set plot or ideas here, we can brainstorm something together. I would like Billy to be manhandled a little bit ✨

(MALE) Stormfront x Homelander

•Ok I will admit, this is pretty out of left field. I’m a show only, and I recently found out that Stormfront was originally a guy in the comics. I’m aware that the two medias are VERY different in story, but I’d like to combine bits and pieces of both of them into something weird and new, like this version of the ship, for example.

Cookie Run (Kingdom & Tower of Adventures)

Milk Cookie x Dark Choco Cookie

•This is probably one of the few times where I prefer standard yandere dynamics to knife romance or mutual yandere shenanigans. Milk Cookie being absolutely obsessed with and overprotective of his prince.. he’s chasing after him in the pancake tower, trying to reunite with him, maybe. (Also, I’ve been brainstorming a silly superhero au with them and how Dark Choco was once a hero turned evil due to corruption, and Milk is trying to save him/bring him back by any means necessary).

And that’s it! Very long winded of me, sorry about that. Either like this post and I’ll dm you, or just dm me! Ty~

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