#it's relentless really

[fangirleaconmigo]

Rereading some Baptism of Fire passages to put together an answer for an ask, and...did...Zoltan just answer Dandelion's question with...to make little boys ask questions? Only a bit cruder? lmaoooo

The crew is about to enter a graveyard to rest for the night, and everyone is really skittish and worried about ghouls. Zoltan pulls his sword:

"An ancient dwarven incantation in ancient dwarven runes is engraved on my sihil," Zoltan growled, drawing his sword... "Ah," said Dandelion, who had just joined them, said with interest. "So those are the famous secret runes of the dwarves? What does the engraving say?" "Confusion to the whore's sons!"

Baptism of Fire pg 117

[shepscapades]

Your highness… I don’t feel so good

[skellydun]

Actual Phone Conversation I Had With A Girl Absolutely Going Through It This Morning:

me very quickly: hi this is dylan from x. how are you today? is now a good time to talk?

girl on the phone: what? oh you know! it's just work, work, work.

me: haha yeah! Just another busy Monday :)

girl on the phone i have known for exactly 11 seconds: sometimes i wish it would just stop. it's relentless. and it's every week! how many mondays can someone go through?

me trying to do my job: ha ha i know right? so I'm calling--

girl on the phone i have known for exactly 16 seconds: i'm so tired. i'm soooooo tired. shelby kept me up all night again. she will not get over keegan. they keep calling each other just to yell i swear to god.

me: only 4 days till the weekend and some sleep! :D

girl: yeah. but she's sleeping with me. at my house. didn't he tell you? who is going to get the dog? or the fucking 300 dollar blender I got them?

me: unfortunately no! so i would love to know more but the reason i'm calling is to get you scheduled for x job interview are you still interested?

girl whispering: what?

me awkwardly: it's...i'm dylan. from x. the x job you applied for. we would like to interview you for it.

girl: oh my god. no. oh my - I am so sorry. I thought you were my friend--I cannot believe--I told you work was relentless. I don't really mean that! I talked about blenders!

me: no, no I totally get it. It can be. But that's why you're interviewing for somewhere better! Tell Shelby to apply too! Do you have any availability on Thursday?

[kat-rose-griffith]

[azultecnicolor]

"If i am lying, then kill me now"

-

Special thanks to @gerandor for the farsi translation 💗

[thepatronsaintoffilth]

that tonal shift between Meet The Grahams and Not Like Us is absolutely wild to me in hindsight. Plus it felt like a direct response to all the people sleeping on Kdot's banger/bop credentials. Just picturing everyone crying on the floor in despair from MTG, only for Kdot to burst through the wall like the kool aid man yelling "YOU MUHFUCKAS SAID YOU WANTED TO DANCE, GET UP NIGGAS, LETS DANCE"

[bottombaron]

oh ok so its the usual no-homo bullshit you always hear, good to know.

[greykolla-art]

The documentary crew put that glitter filter on them, not me! ✨

[thepunkmuppet]

GUILLERMO DE LA CRUZ

↳ #the real ones are all of the above [ insp ]

[losthalfelf]

guillermo referring to his vampire turning as his „first time“ and then repeatedly mentioning how he had always envisioned nandor to do it, how he wished he would’ve waited for him to do it instead-

[memosminifridge]

.🩸🩸🩸.

What We Do in the Shadows 5x10 | Manipulate, Mansplain, Malewife

[honorarypines]

I finished the sitcom ever, so text posts be upon ye

[captaincleverusernamehere]

nandor the resemblance…

[michelle-jacksons-art-blog]

To be loved is to be changed.

[beevean]

I can't stop thinking about this morning's anon and some of their wording. "This was so scary to write because if any of my friends knew about this my life would be over".

It's short but I honestly felt so bad for them. They really don't need this on top of their other experiences. And what's worse, this is the common mentality now: I keep seeing, on Twitter and Tiktok screenshots, teenagers who genuinely ask if a ship they like is "proship", with the underlying message being "please don't bully me".

And listen to me. I am the most insecure bitch on the planet. I would literally eat my own hands with ketchup and mayonnaise rather than reveal my music tastes to other people. I've been endlessly mocked for my passions ever since I was a child - not bullied, but I've been told by parents and classmates that no one cares, or I'm too old for this, or I need to live in the modern world... long story short, to this day I do not want to be perceived. So I understand the feeling of "you will pry my true tastes from my cold dead hands". I am old enough to know these are irrational thoughts, but to this day I much prefer to keep things to myself.

So listen: you deserve friends who do not judge you.

Again:

You deserve friends who do not judge you.

It's one thing to prefer to keep your tastes private because you're a private person. That's fine! That is your right! But please, if you really think your friends will hate you because you happen to read Problematic™ fiction... no, that shouldn't happen. Especially not on the internet, where nobody should know about you as a person. Friends who do care about you would not think any less of you for something as common (yes it's common!) as enjoying some spicy stories. It is not a crime. It does not say anything about your morals. And it's even worse if you've already suffered in the past, but this goes for everyone.

I don't want to get into the whole pro/anti ship discourse because I am sick of how easily the internet twists the meaning of important words until discussions can't be had because the two factions are not even talking about the same thing anymore. I don't know anon's previous or current stance on shipping, what they meant by that comment, and again the wording worries me a little when combined with that other comment. I do have my thoughts about it that go beyond what "proship" means, and I'll summarize:

not only no one deserves harassment for what they ship, but the only thing you can judge from someone's writing is their writing level. Not their actual personality, not their experiences, and less of all their real-life morals.

Brand this backwards on your forehead and read that in the mirror everytime you wake up.

Anyway. I don't know if you'll read this, anon, but I really wish you all the best luck in the future. And I'm very glad that you approached me to tell me that - as sad as the circumstances are, and I'm sorry for being self-aggrandizing, your praise made my day :)

[cottoncandysprite]

I just woke up I can't do this rn

EDIT: THIS IS IN FACT FROM THE ROAST