#it's probably one of those things we'd have to test more to see how much it actually helps

[thethingything]

okay this is a very like, tentatively hopeful thing, but the last time we went outside we took antihistamines before going out, and we noticed afterwards that we didn't feel anywhere near as bad as expected, which lines up with stuff we'd seen about antihistamines helping with preventing post-exertional malaise if you take them before exercise.

so I took one maybe 40 minutes ago to see if it would also help during a flare up, and I think it has? my head feels clearer and my muscles feel less heavy and I'm not as out of breath as I was. I still feel worse than usual, but not as bad as I did, so maybe this might be something that helps? hopefully? and if so then holy shit that would be incredible

[alex51324]

A sensitive topic, but useful information

If you have a uterus, etc., and are dysphoric enough about it that you don't go to the gyno, here's a thing I learned this week that may come in handy one day, if you start having pain or other symptoms from that department:

There's a way you can at least get started on having all those organs checked out, without taking your pants off.

It's called a transabdominal pelvic ultrasound--you lay down, fully clothed, and just pull up your shirt as far as your ribcage, and undo your fly and push your trousers/underwear down to your hipbones. (And if you still feel too exposed, you can get a drape for the parts of your abdomen they aren't working on at any given moment.)

The technician goes over you with the little wand-thing (like you see on TV when pregnant people are getting a scan of the fetus); it takes a while, but it doesn't feel like much of anything.

Note: It's common, if you possess the relevant anatomy, for them to do what's called a transvaginal pelvic ultrasound along with the transabdominal one--that does indeed involve taking your pants off (and worse). It gives a better view of the ovaries, apparently, and it can be more convenient for them to go ahead and do that at the same appointment. But both my doctor and the technician who did the test were completely understanding and familiar with the concept that someone might not be up for that. All I had to do was hint to my doctor that I wasn't comfortable with the internal, and she said that was fine, we'd just do the transabdominal scan, and if that didn't provide enough information we'd talk about options based on whatever the findings were.

(The person at the central scheduling hotline, on the other hand, was kind of confused and kept trying to schedule me for the other thing, but honestly, I got the impression she was either very new to the job or just not the sharpest crayon in the box, bless her heart. Once I got in the room with the technician, she immediately grasped the situation and everything was fine.)

So it was all very easy and nontraumatic, and I probably should have had it done ages ago*. If you possess those organs, and are having pain or other symptoms in them that you've been hesitating to bring up** to a doctor because you're not comfortable having an internal exam, there are options available--hopefully your doctor will suggest it right off the bat, like mine did, but if not you can ask for it by name: transabdominal pelvic ultrasound.

(*I've got ovarian cysts, which is common and usually not a big deal, but if I'm reading the report correctly, mine are really quite surprisingly large. I haven't actually talked to the doctor about the results yet; with the holiday weekend it'll probably be Tuesday before I hear back.)

(**I didn't bring up the subject; the doctor felt something when she was palpating my abdomen during a routine physical, because of how fucking huge this cyst is. I should have brought it up.)

[stargazer-sims]

Professor Belle

Belle: Félix, can I go with you to the excavation site tomorrow?

Félix: Of course, but I'll need you to stay with me the whole time. I have a new group of students, and they'll need to focus. I don't want them thinking they have to babysit you.

Belle: No one has to babysit me. I'm a member of the research team. Right?

Félix: Yes, but the students might be skeptical of that. Not every person your age is as responsible and intelligent as you, and unfortunately, some people have a tendency to prejudge.

Belle: Well, that’s just dumb.

Davian: *laughing* It's good to know the youngest member of the research team can still act like a ten year old.

Belle: I'm responsible and intelligent, but nobody said I was a grownup.

Davian: Fair point.

Félix: But you are mature, and we can trust you. That's why you're allowed to come to the excavation site.

Belle: Yeah. Can you imagine my friends at the site? Junior would probably break stuff, and you'd always have to be getting Caroline down from a tree or something. I know I should only climb trees around the field station.

Davian: We'd be happier if you didn't climb trees anywhere, but you know the risks, so...

Belle: Evaluate my choices, right?

Davian: Right.

Belle: I'll be too busy to climb trees tomorrow anyway. I have discoveries to make and students to teach.

Félix: Oh? Are you taking over for me, Professor Belle?

Davian: She probably can teach them something, you know. She's already got more archaeological experience than they do.

Félix: I'll tell you what, Belle. Why don't I let you have a few minutes to instruct the students tomorrow? You can be my assistant. We'll practice this evening so you'll know what you want to say when the time comes.

Belle: Yay! I'm going to be the best assistant you've ever had, I promise!

Félix: I have no doubt.

Belle: So, if I'm going to the site tomorrow and I'm going to be busy all day, does that mean I can skip my math lesson?

Davian: No. It means you'll have to do extra lessons the day after. Just because you're in the rainforest and you're learning cool stuff that isn't in your school books, that doesn't mean you get to ignore them. Remember, there's still going to be a test.

Belle: So, I guess the right choice would be to get ready for the test. I just wish I liked math more.

Félix: It's okay if you don't like it. Nobody can force you to like things. I'm not friends with math either, and when I was your age I was much happier following my father all around Al-Simhara and making discoveries with him. But I had to study math as well, because I needed it to graduate high school and get into university.

Belle: I'm going to university some day. I guess that means I have to be nice to math, even if we're not friends.

Félix: Be nice to math and it'll be nice to you.

Belle: *giggling* By helping me get into university?

Félix: Exactly so.

Belle: I can live with that.

Davian: Now that we've got that settled, how about we do a little exploring before dinner? I'll bet we can find some awesome butterflies if we take that trail over there. Check out all the flowers. I hear tropical butterflies love those.

Belle: Yes! Félix, can Davian and I borrow your camera? I want to take pictures if we see any butterflies. Then I can identify them and write a paragraph for my science journal.

Félix: That sounds like a good idea. While you and Davian are out butterfly hunting, I'm going to catch up with Dr. Santiago. I'll see the two of you at dinner at the field station.

Davian: Sounds good.

Belle: If we find any butterflies, we'll tell you all about it!

Félix: I can hardly wait. Good luck.

Belle: I think it's more about scientific methodology than luck.

Félix: *smiling* In that case... good scientific methodology, Professor Belle. I await your report on your findings.

[gingerandhoney16]

I think that's so cool you both are on this journey together! If you don't mind me asking, how did you bring up the conversation of wanting to gain weight and the whole kink/feederism community to your wife? Also from honeys perspective, how did you feel when he confronted you about gaining? Thank you both! 😊

Sorry, this is going to be far longer than I'd originally thought, so bear with...

It took a long time - far too long really! We were discussing this this morning and Honey said one of the things she felt when I did tell her was being a bit miffed that I HAD taken so long to bring it up, sort of 'did I not trust her or feel comfortable enough with her' sort of thing. But I guess I was always so used to it being a private thing and something to hide from the world. Even from a very young age you're pretty aware of what's considered weird by most people. And then with meeting Honey and her being a bigger gal too, I should have felt I could open up more. But instead I focussed more on praising her and helping her enjoy and accept how sexy her body was instead. I felt like I did drop some hints, testing the waters by teasing about my own 'relationship weight gain' over time and how I quite liked being bigger than I used to be. And Honey's responses made me feel that she was accepting of it, and the joy I used to see in her when she'd made me a special treat even made me wonder if she had some 'soft' feeder tendencies. But after feeling more and more like I wanted to open up, to share what was such a turn on and so hot to me, it turned out my hints had been competely useless! When I finally told her we were laying in bed (note: it's easier to talk about difficult topics if you're not looking at the person, like when in bed, or driving), and I slowly teased out that what would she think if I said I wanted to gain weight... like, quite alot of weight. And I felt terrible when I realised I was being met by this look and voice of confusion and shock - that in a few seconds of finally, selfishly divulging this inner part of me that I'd turned her world completely upside down. THIS was why I had always just kept it bottle up inside, why I would stuff myself in the car on the way home and then dump the packaging in a park bin before getting home. I knew she wouldn't understand. But what I didn't realise is that it wasn't that she wouldn't understand... it was that by leaving it so long, for years, that it made the revelation come more out of the blue than it should have been. And for that I can only be sorry I didn't have more faith in her and our relationship earlier.

Needless to say, we did move forwards. It took a while - it's been about 3 years since then. Early on it didn't feel like we were going to navigate this obstacle I'd introduced very well. Honey understandingly had questions - how big did I want to get? What impact might it have on my health and lifespan? In trying to answer the first question I opted to show her some of the kinds of guys I liked the look of here on tumblr. This didn't help as Honey, not being a natural FFA found pretty much all of them far from a turn. And then that raised the new question of whether I even found her attractive or was I more into the thought of me gaining - too in my own head as such? So, it's been a long journey, and taken alot of work and input from both sides to convince each other that we do find each other attractive, and that even through future changes we still will. And it's made us both confront questions that we probably both never though we'd have to. Honey said this morning that she felt like a hypocrite that she had gained so much weight herself and I was still attracted to her and loved her, and yet here she was worried that she wouldn't find me attractive if I got fat. But all of it boils down to worry and fear of the unknown, and the only way to fill in those unknows is to trust in each other and talk about it. I'd recommend to anyone who's in the same boat - if you know your partner loves you, then trust them. There are so many people on here and on feabie that I've come across in the past few years, who did what I didn't and opened up or were opened up to by their partner far earlier in their relationships. And more often than not they were met with love, understanding, and in some lucky cases an interest in exploring the kink more with their partner. But you never know till you take that leap of faith.

G & H

[umgeorge]

george russell is interviewed during the press conference, saudi arabia - march 6, 2024 (transcript under the cut)

Interviewer: "George, why don't we start with you? Mercedes were difficult to read at the pre-season test, and it feels they were a little bit difficult to read at the first race weekend, as well. What conclusions did you draw from the Bahrain Grand Prix?" George: "I think the conclusions we drew were the car has potential. I think when we saw the pace on FP2, that was genuine. Lewis and I had P1 and P2. I think probably not everybody turned up, but we were genuinely fast. And then in the race we had some really big cooling issues that caught us by surprise, and we know there's at least a fifteen second loss just in the battery and the power, and probably more after you consider the effect it had on the tires. And just an extra couple of seconds in stint one, when I had Checo beind me, would have been pretty handy, so I think we'd have been in the fight for P2, for the podium, with Checo and Carlos, but definitely we didn't show our true potential." Interviewer: "Were those cooling issues a simple miscalculation, or something that actually needs a fix?" George: "I think it was definitely a miscalculation. It would have been quite straightforward to just open the bodywork very slightly and make things much easier, but we don't know how we fell into that place… Sorry, I'm just distracted by Charles walking in." [laughs] Interviewer: "Charles. Welcome!" Leclerc: "Sorry." George: "Yeah, lost my groove now. [laughs] No, but we don't really understand why, because we didn't change anything from testing-in FP2, as well-and it suddenly caught us out on Saturday, so I'm sure it'll be better this weekend." Interviewer: "I was gonna say, are you worried about it this weekend? George: "We need to get on top of it, and we've got some tests tomorrow to try and understand further what happened." Interviewer: "Alright. Thank you, George." [time jump] Journalist: "Nelson Valkenburg, Viaplay, for George: F1 media, everybody, is obsessed with the possibility of is Max going to Mercedes. How would you feel if a driver who had some choice words for you a year ago would join the team?" George: [laughs] "Yeah, I think… As I said last week in Bahrain, this is my third season now alongside Lewis, greatest driver of all time, and I feel like I've done a pretty good job alongside him, so whoever were to line up alongside me next year or the years to come, I welcome anybody, welcome the challenge. You always wanna go against the best, but ultimately, for me, just focused on myself. I believe in myself, I believe I can beat anybody on the grid, and you just got to have that mentality, so as I said, having Lewis as my benchmark for the last couple of years has been a pretty good benchmark, for sure." [time jump]

Journalist: "But what chance, George? What chance is Max Verstappen really going to Mercedes? From the inside, could you see it happening? 'Cause it would be perobably the biggest story since your current teammate signed for Ferrari." George: "I think any team want to have the best driver line-up possible and right now Max is the best driver on the grid, so if any team had a chance to sign Max they would 100% be taking it. So I think the question's more on the other side, on his side, and on Red Bull's side. Obviously so much going on there. We don't know what truly's going on behind closed doors and ultimately it's none of our business right now. Yeah, I guess it would be exciting." [time jump] (NOT SHOWN:) Journalist: "David Croft, Sky Sports F1. You all did 57 laps. Everyone did 57 laps, apart from those that were lapped, on Saturday in Bahrain. You all went into the race optimistic, I'm sure, because it was the first race of the season. How was your optimism levels at the checkered flag? That's to all of you." George: "I think after three days of testing everybody knows Bahrain pretty well. It all panned out as we probably expected, but obviously we all hope that the field tightens up a little bit right at the front. But the fight behind Max, I think, is really, really tight and it's gonna be quite exciting, between ourselves, Ferrari, Aston, and McLaren." [time jump] (NOT SHOWN:) Journalist: "Diego Mejia, Fox Sports Mexico. Both Charles and George, about the issues you had with the cooling, with the brakes and the power unit, is that a worry here? Was it probably the changing conditions in Bahrain that caused that, that we had probably the lowest temperature before the race started and then it was increasing over the race weekend?" George: "Yeah, similar to Charles, it was definitely a bit of an odd one for us, but we're confident we're on top of it and won't face the same issue this weekend."

[recoveryrambles]

Tonight I had my first weight exposure with my dietitian.

Basically, she told me my weight instead of doing it blind, and we talked about what came up.

The longterm intention is to spend less time talking about the number itself, and session-by-session to normalize that (possible crisis not withstanding) the number doesn't mean much of anything.

It went okay I think? Part of the reason we're doing this is because I'd been weighing myself (I don't own a scale, but I'd checked at a friend's house and at the doctor's office. I've been open about it with my team. I have trouble not doing the thing when the "opportunity" presents itself.). I guess part of the choice to do this together in session is to reduce that secrecy, too.

The challenge at the moment is that my weight was less than I last knew it as, which my ed self is having a field day with. The [greater?] challenge will be when I see that number inevitably flux (because that's how bodies work. And also I'm still not fully consistently hitting meal plan).

I was also able to talk to my dietitian about her saying that I was in a lapse last session. And she was like, "Oh shit, was that the first time we talked about that?" and I was like, "The first time that word was used, yeaaaahhhh...." It helped to recalibrate and talk it out more to understand that it wasn't coming out of the blue --- she genuinely thought we'd used the word already.

She also told me she's not worried. That this isn't a relapse, I'm doing the thing overall, and she reminded me that recovery isn't linear. She was like, "If there's a cause for concern we'll be on it, and you're well within range of being okay." I think I made a face because then she was like, "Which is not a challenge."

She's right, I know. I want to be smart and sustainable about all this.

I told her I'm amped (because I am) that I started playing Guitar Hero again for the first time in, like, a decade (I got the guitar for my birthday last week and I borrowed the wii game from the library). I said I'm really excited to be great at medium. And she was like, "How about finding places in the rest of your life to be excited about 'medium' too? Testing the water of not going 110% in literally everything?"

Recovery is probably one of those places. I don't mean not putting effort in --- I mean stepping back from the pressure of doing it absolutely "perfectly."

TL;DR: I feel conflicted about both being "steady" and "lapsing" at the same time. The dialectic of recovery is wild.

Okay, bedtime for Bonzo. Night y'all!

[hawthornsword]

Bad Batch Finale spoilers and ... Critique? I dunno it's probably just me bitching a lot.

Well...

It's not Star Wars if somebody doesn't lose a hand.

I would just like to point out that I wrote a fic that included releasing the zillo beast as a distraction, Nala Se's death, rescuing the brothers imprisoned on Tantiss, Hemlock with a blaster to Omega's head with Hunter and Crosshair as the one's to save her, specifically with Crosshair taking the shot, over a year ago.

People often come up with ideas of what they think will happen (what they want to happen) that are so wildly outlandishly off base that I wonder if we're even watching the same show. So predicting that many things correctly makes me feel pretty smug, not gonna lie.

Anyway!

I love that Echo got to shine this episode and that he always knows exactly what Omega is going to do, because he trained her. That is Echo's kid, and he's so damn proud of her. You can of course see all of the Batch's influence on her - I think that's really well done actually. But I love Echo and Omega's dynamic so much; they're my favorite.

It hurt me so much when Crosshair said Clone Force 99 died with Tech. 😭😭😭 We think of Hunter as the leader, but was he really? By their own direct and indirect admissions at various points, Tech was the glue that held them together.

I'm glad Nala Se was against the empire in the end, but honestly her whole storyline did not go as I expected, and I'm not impressed with it. She's not a good person. She's not reformed. She was the lead scientist in charge on a project that treated human beings as expendable slave labor, erased individuality with reconditioning and murdered anyone who didn't obey or perform high enough with decommissioning. That's canon, you can look it up. Omega being her favorite and her being against the empire doesn't change that. This is an enemy of my enemy situation, not a reformed and on our side now situation. Honestly I think I'm mostly disappointed because they could have given her a complex and interesting story arc, whether it was a villain arc or a redemption arc either way, where we dig into her motivations and her change over time. I actually expected we'd get that from episode one, but what we got of her was sort of glossed over and only present enough to move the plot as necessary.

Same with Emerie to a lesser degree. There was that one line she had a few episodes ago. Something about being "discarded". I'm assuming that means she was a sort of test run for Omega. That's why she's older. That's why she's a scientist. I want the whole story there.

I also expected Rex to show up with backup, but narratively it makes sense. This show is about the Bad Batch, not Rex. It started with just them, it needs to end with just them.

But now of course we need the Echo and Rex show, in which we find out what happens to them and Wolffe between now and Rebels.

I also really truly believed (and I know a lot of us did) one of those X troopers would be Tech and there would be a big standoff where the power of love and brotherhood would overcome his conditioning. While on the one hand, Tech's death was a good one, on the other hand Tech was my favorite and I feel like they purposely baited us all season as a misdirection. Well played, but also fuck them for that. I don't know, maybe we all exaggerated the likelihood of it being Tech because we wanted it so bad.

But if that shot of the one X trooper's helmet with goggles was meant to imply that one of them was Tech, and Wrecker and Echo killed him? Well fuck them even more. I hate my brain for even having that thought. Let's pretend I didn't.

Also fuck them for wasting Scorch like that! How fucking dare they! Why did they bother making that commando Scorch if they weren't gonna do anything interesting with him, and once again misdirect us by making us think he mattered somehow?

The misdirection with Tech I totally understand, but did we really need two? At this point I feel like including Scorch and also Cody was name dropping purely to bait Legends fans and Cody fans to watch the show when maybe we otherwise wouldn't have. Am I biased because Cody being in the season 2 trailer is 100% of why I bothered to watch this show in the first place? Maybe.

Anyway, all in all, it was a good episode, a good season, and a good show. I had a good time watching it and there's a lot to love about it. I'm not going to say I'm definitively disappointed despite my complaints here, because I do fully expect them to announce a new show almost immediately now that BB is over. It's Disney. Star Wars makes them assloads of money. They aren't going to stop.

I just hope they give us more Jedi and clones, because I have zero interest in Tales of the Empire or Acolyte and I won't be watching them. Fuck the Sith, man. Sure I was curious what happened to Barriss but not curious enough to watch a show specifically about the bad guys. And I like the Ahsoka show, but I don't care that much about Elsbeth's backstory. Nightsisters? Yes. Elsbeth? Meh. I found Baylan and Shin more compelling.

But back to Bad Batch. I do think the ending with Omega grown up was absolutely wonderful. I was smiling the whole time. Omega is so great, I love her so much, and I'm really proud of her.

Also Hunter looks much hotter with the salt n pepper beard. 10/10.

Maybe we can get a Tales of the Rebellion as well as Tales of the Clones like we want. I want to know if Omega meets Luke and Leia. I would like her and Luke and Han and Hera sitting around talking about ships and piloting. I want her to meet Chewbacca and ask after Gungi. I want her to be talking to Han and find out about his beef with Boba and apologize and be embarrassed that one of her brothers is willingly a bad guy.

I'm gonna be writing SO MUCH Rebellion/Original Trilogy era Omega fanfiction.

[dumbdomb]

I also live in socal and I look for you when I’m out. I imagine telling you I saw your tumblr and that’s how I know you want this as bad as I do before grabbing you all over and dragging you somewhere a little more private. I’ld tell you Ild be your safe person and we could do everything together while my hands explored under your cloths, that I want to be a perfect service top for you before feeling for your wetness without asking for consent first, because be honest, reading what you write here it doesn’t matter, you just want my desire and I want to give it to you. You could scratch me or bite me or punch me to try to get me to stop but we both would know your hearts not in it, you want my desire and you only put up a fight because you want me to prove my care and lust and devotion. So take it it all. Tell me how you want it, just don’t tell me to stop.

what's funny is i'm never out without my entourage, like the ✨️ Princess ✨️ i am. you'd never get close enough to me, nor would i enjoy being dragged off somewhere... honestly, if you really want to prove yourself, then why would you move so fast? slow down and appreciate the opportunity you've been given. think about it. wouldn't it feel much nicer seeing me show up more often after meeting you for the first time?

it may not seem like it here, but i am actually very shy in person. i love when people i interact with are nice and helpful. maybe you'd offer to help get something off a store shelf for me and unintentionally brush my hand. after a while, we'd both be surprised to see each other at an event (and if you're more social than i am, we may even have a longer chat if you carry the conversation). each time we meet, we'd build more trust in each other, and i'd open up a little more... then, one day, you'd give me your number and ask if i want to be friends...

who could be a safer person to spend more time with than a good friend? i'd be so brave to meet up with someone i didn't really know and had no other connections with. you're just so nice and cute (no bad vibes at all. an honest sweetheart who may earnestly be trying to flirt with me, though i'm kind of oblivious to it). like, imagine meeting me and instantly and instinctively wanting to serve me, to keep me safe, to be with me everywhere i go, to take care of me...

maybe you'd convince me to meet up at the fair, and we'd have fun playing games all day. when i finally begin to let my walls down around you, i'd notice how comfortable i am with your small touches here and there - but you never get too handsy. until we have a moment alone together and you decide it's time to risk what we have built so far, to change our relationship forever...

i think if we were close enough, in our blooming friendship, you could easily rest your arm around my shoulders. maybe we've gotten into a habit of being that close already (how slow can you take things to become a real, meaningful part of my life?) you'd ask me if you were my favorite person and confess that you want to keep our relationship strong. you'd tell me how safe you feel when we're together and you want to do everything with me, truthfully admitting your vulnerability as your hand moves over me.

while i consider your thoughtful words and how i feel about you, my heart begins beating faster as you softly grope my chest to test my level of resistance. i'd probably feel quite nervous then, taking note of how close we are and being able to smell you next to me. without a quick answer, you'd reach over and have both my tits in your gentle hands - waiting for the moment i try to speak or push you away, just so you can reach under my clothes and fondle my big tits...

Read my pinned BEFORE you interact! 18+ only.

if you don't want it to stop, then don't try to force it. slowly build up the desire between us, prove your service by making me ache for more of you; let all the intimacy of those moments be sensual and vulnerable and raw. i need you to be my safe person, my best friend i'd do everything with, and i want all of your devotion to be Mine.

NO: lurkers, likes only, inactive, empty, or blank blogs. DO NOT LIKE MY CONTENT. DNI. ♥️

[turtlemagnum]

i think my first exposure to AI art might've been this video where somebody was testing out this new, weird thing where they automatically generate a song using AI, and i couldnt help but feel that it was an indictment of the modern music scene that a goddamn computer could effortlessly and accurately replicate the generic swill that passes for popular music nowadays. didnt have a vocalist synthesized yet but those have been becoming a thing too, or so i hear.

i saw a little article about how the newer generations of gamers are turning more and more to retro games. as somebody technically belonging to the "newer generations" this felt self evident, as frankly most of the gaming i do nowadays is almost invariably in an emulator. i think that to a certain extent, most of the best mainstream games that are going to be made already have been, at least for the forseeable future of major developers with games made scientifically perfect for milking you for the most money possible rather than as an art form. im sure it's all gonna collapse in on itself eventually, from what i hear some of the older folks who lived through more than i have we've been here before. hell, pretty much anybody who cares even a bit about gaming history knows first and foremost about the gaming crash of the early 80s, mostly spurred on by the temporal equivalent of modern cheap asset flip garbage that floods most stores these days. it's hard not to feel like we're about to see a massive crash yet again, with the ones inheriting the earth being the little fellas, and of course nintendo. which, makes sense, their earliest history is of weathering shit just like this, of course they'd know when to spot enshittification and stay clear of it. i'm in no way saying that nintendo is exempt of being a shitty corporation, but i will say that from a business standpoint they're one of the only ones i know of that actually seem to understand the idea of sustainability on a broad scale. hell of a lot better than the likes of activision, thats for damn sure. but back to what i was actually trying to get at before i adhd tangent'd, i think it makes a lot of sense that when the majority of the shit being put on the market is corporatist, design by comittee, prefab trash with aggressive monetization and a consistent attitude of fixing any problems in patches, it makes a hell of a lot of sense that we'd go back to our roots. NES mario is the same as its ever been, has been for over 30 years, and will be in another 30. you dont gotta worry about them patching it to make it actually function as advertised, or patching it from being something you enjoyed into something you hate, or having fomo marketing based microtransaction bullshit. the most that's gonna change is that every now and again, nintendo will make the only version they give not have flashing lights for epileptic folks, or patch out mike tyson because he sucks and replace him with a white guy, and the white guy's less hard but thats ok because it's still pretty hard, and either way it's a good game, fun, and you can still find the original on rom sites and also probably ebay if you dont have a vpn but do have a disposable income, so dont worry about it. getting sidetracked again, ANYWAYS-

what i wanted to get at is that i wonder if we're gonna see a similar resurgence in other old kinds of media just like, in general, for the mainstream. like why watch the 22nd reboot of ghost busters when the originals are right there. king crimson's still good, why dont you listen to them instead of bemoaning how your new favs are problematic, even though i dont think fripp can reclaim the fag slur (im gay, i can it's fine). i've recently been watching fist of the north star and original dragon ball, ilike the m. there are books. lots of those, actually,. you can read em! if you have the attention span. i honestly think we might be seeing more and more of this, now that im looking out for it. like i see just like, random people mention how much they like prog rock or 1930s dracula. relatively normals talk about how they like lemon demon these days. those stupid aestheticized classic anime accounts on twitter get sososo many likes. can you tell im sleep deprived writing this? i can, and im writing thjis. im writing this SO HARD. send poast.

[autisticempathydaemon]

Hi! sending in an ask for the Redacted Audio matchups just cuz I'm curious~

What song are you fixated on at the moment? What lyric or verse, and why?

Oooh, I'm very hyper fixated on "I will survive" covered by Post-Modern Jukebox in a 40s Jazz style. I just love that specific era of music in jazz, I don't know what to say. Everything about this song has me in a bit of a tizzy because I've been working on something related to it recently and the verse:

"Go on now, go, walk out the door

Just turn around now

'Cause you're not welcome anymore

Weren't you the one who tried to hurt me with goodbye?

You think I'd crumble?

You think I'd lay down and die?"

I've been in a very "I don't give a fuck about other's problems with me" mood and it's been hitting that itch of just not caring about things that aren't working for my good.

What is your Enneagram type?

I'm a Type Four actually, the individualist!

Do you love gargantuan Youtube video essays, and if so, which is your favorite and why?

Ooooh yes I do! I happen to really love a particular video essay by Super Eyepatch Wolf regarding what undertale did to the internet because it's just such a fun and entertaining dissection of how a fandom I used to be a part of behaved and grew beyond its original expectations into something so widely known and self sustaining. Plus I do like his accent.

Tell me about your childhood imaginary friend.

I would tell you but I did not have or I don't remember having one. For a lot of my life, I recall being very grounded in what was in front of me so I don't think I remember ever creating a friend that wasn't there, I just did stuff by myself to entertain myself.

What is your go-to way to fall asleep?

Oh that's easy, I put on some hot camomile/herbal tea, drink, lay in bed while I listen to something and then fall asleep–either that or succumb to tiredness and fall into bed.

If you had to change your name, what would it be, and why? (In tandem, if you have changed your name, why did you pick that one?)

I picked my new name because I wanted a name that reminded me of light/the sun or something that sounded like you'd hear as the name of an angel or a celestial body. I just wanted to evoke the presence of something like that when you heard it so upon hearing it, there would be a nice warm vibe.

What is your favorite of Redacted’s audios, and why?

"Getting Dressed up for you Feisty Werewolf Boyfriend". I have to say, I actually do like getting dolled up for things and I like attention so when this combined both of those things, then I was sold and it just has some great lines in there from Milo and his accent comes out in the sweetest of ways + THE LAP TEST!!! Never wanted to find my ass in someone's lap that fast in my life.

What Redacted boy holds no appeal to you, and why? Like, not the one you hate but the one who you don’t get the hype for. (I won’t judge, I promise.)

I'm gonna be honest, it's Vega. I can't sit still and listen to him, I think he's very interesting and that's he's got such a good setup for his role in the redacted universe but outside of his BAs, I don't care for him much. Like, yeahhh, It's not that I don't like him, I just don't care for him.

Tell me about that one book/movie/tv show you know all the words to.

Gods, I have not watched a TV show in a while, or a movie…I've read books but I just don't do it as often because I have things to do…hmmmmmmmm, I'm gonna probably out myself as a marvel fan because I can still tell you shit about the movies, shows and comics if asked. I've ingrained so much of it into my mind that it's second hand knowledge. I did it solely because I dove into the fandom and just started absorbing everything about black panther but then I just subtly started absorbing stuff about other characters and now I just know things about them.

Which Redacted boy are you platonically attracted to? Like- forget dating, which dude do you want to be your best friend?

Gavin. Like, yes we'd fuck around but I just see him more as a friend I would fuck around with and maybe just keep it that way because he just vibes that way to me. Like we really could just be good friends and that would be all I need and I'd treat his confession like that of how much he appreciated me as a person. It's iffy because I may actually like him but I see him more as a friend.

Do you have a go-to thing you ramble about when you’re tired, and if so, what is it? (For example, my boyfriend knows I’m ready to sleep when I start talking about space.)

People know I'm tired if I start rambling about anything that's brought up. Like I'll go into a tangent about fucking cheese just to not have to sleep at all and it's really just like that.

Tell me your go-to gas station and drink combo.

I don't go to gas stations very often given that I don't get a lot of car rides and I don't own a car so…yeah…the last one I went to was a shell gas station and I had a coke with me and that was…a month ago? Yeah I think.

Tell me about your favorite playlist at the moment.

My fave playlist would have to be one I made for Sweetheart because of all the songs I placed on it. There's a lot of songs I put on there that I relate to and the energy I put into building it was meant to evoke that of someone who was somewhere close to being a mystery and a badass whilst also having gifted kid trauma and being a mischievous person that gets love sick pretty hard. The song I'd say that did start that playlist tho was "Who is she" by I Monster just given how much it really spoke as SH to me, making them seem like such an alluring but complex mystery that was both so close but so out of reach. It just hits for early SH to me and I love it so much for them to be seen as something that has an enticing presence but is one revered as an entity beyond understanding.

If you're talking about redacted playlists tho (because I got confused) then it's the seer obscura playlist. There's so much lore about seers in between there and I find Morgan absolutely charming so it's a fun mix of me getting to know lore and getting to know a person which feeds my ever curious mind in the best way possible.

What’s your guilty pleasure media, and why?

Hmmmmmmm…Don't judge me, but I do actually really like hearing about scary urban legends/stories/mythology. I don't know what to say about it? I love the thrill of getting scared about something that may or may not exist and being immersed in everything about the mystery and fright of it all. That's why I like stuff such as TMA, Eldritch horror, Malevolent, SCPs and horror.

And whatever else you think tells me about who you are!

I am an artist/writer that picks up new interests and hobbies like a cat lady picks up stray cats. I love pushing the limits of what I can do to see how wide of a skill set I can give myself just because I both love the hobby and because I find the process of learning it all and experimenting with the hobby interesting. I also am polyamorous and love dating Sims which is ironic because of the fact that they usually make you pick one person to be with but I like going through the different routes just to see what everyone is like.

I don't know why it's so funny and cute, but I just love the idea of taking someone who lives and breathes horror and pairing them with Milo, that big, fucking, scaredy wolf.

That's not the only reason I like y'all as a pair, of course. The fandom vibe seems to be that Milo loves big band jazz/swing music, and I am inclined to agree. A cat lover deserves another cat lover, someone that will love Aggro. In the end, though, can't you just imagine Milo listening to The Magnus Archives? He'd jump so high in the air, even though there's so few auditory jump scares. I can just hear him in my head, griping "How does this Jonathan Sims motherfucker come up with this bullshit? And who names their main character after themself? Who does that?"

Though, in a way, I can see every Redacted boi in a poly relationship of some sort and form, Milo is definitely my favorite to headcanon for that. There's something about his character, charm, and playfulness that, I think, would allow him to be matched with anyone and maintain this natural, easy-going chemistry, which I'll touch more on in the Runner-Ups segment.

Song:

Pardon the way that I stare/ There's nothin' else to compare/ The sight of you leaves me weak/ There are no words left to speak

Ya like jazz? lol couldn't resist but, yeah, I love big, cheesy, jazzy numbers for Milo, the kind he'd showboat and dance to, twirling you around the house. It doesn't get more classic than that. I could totally imagine Marie liking this type of music too, and so it's really heartwarming if that's something they have in common.

Runner-Ups:

So this was really fun to consider, because my criteria for this was not just who's a good match for you but also who's a good match for you and Milo? Lasko comes first to mind, because @friendlyfaded invaded my brain like a gorgeous, intelligent invasive species and convinced me they'd be lovely together. Their contrasting extro/introverted natures would complement each other, and they'd both be terrible babies when it comes to horror which amuses me deeply. I'd also consider Asher as he and Milo have an established history and rapport that could transition into a beautiful romantic relationship. Asher's Enneagram type, the 9w8, would help, as I think it makes him an excellent beta and would make him a really good partner and mediator.

Note: I have no practical experience with polyamory so I hope this was okay and made sense and that you liked it!

Want a match-up of your own? Read this post, and tell me about yourself! 💌

[normalsdotheolympics]

The Triathlon Takes Shape

We've been back from vacation for 3 weeks now, and I think we're FINALLY back to where we were before we left. Our bodies are sore and we've been working hard, and we've finally gotten back into form. It's crazy how long it took. We've had to work hard on stretching in particular, as everything really tightened up while we were gone.

We're now just over 3 months from attempting our sprint triathlon in mid-June. We've bought bikes and helmets, and just got our bike shorts as well. So we'll soon get out on the paths to try out the bikes for real. But in the meantime, we decided it would be worthwhile to start working on connecting the three disciplines to test our bodies a little bit. The sprint triathlon is 750m in the pool, 20km on the bike, and 10km running. So, this week, we thought we'd try half of that just to see how it would feel. Honestly, it went better than expected! We decided to do it at the gym and do it indoors. The swim went by so fast at only 375m. The bike portion was frustrating for me - I felt like I was really struggling with the stationary bike. I couldn't figure out how to adjust it quite right. It felt like way more effort than it should have been and my quads were burning. I think the seat was too low but I couldn't get it to go to the height I wanted, and the pedals were too loose around my feet. Definitely some things we'll have to work on there going forward... But the big accomplishment was managing to do the full 2.5km running on the treadmill afterwards! All in all, we did 1/4 of a triathlon (1/2 of the sprint) in about 55 minutes.

We decided to be ambitious and the following day, to try 20% more distance, getting us to 30% of the triathlon distance (60% of the sprint). The swim was up to 450m and honestly, it didn't really feel like it was much harder. Oh, I also decided to try this without the buoy, so that's been another new effort here. I tried adjusting the bike more this time, but honestly, I was still struggling with it. I just couldn't figure out how to get everything to just the right height. Aaaand it was pretty ambitious to do this two days in a row, so the running was a bit of a struggle. What's crazy is that running at 8km/hr vs walking at 5.5km/hr doesn't add nearly as much time as you'd think. I managed to run 2/3 of it, and walk out the rest, and it only added a few extra minutes, so overall it was mostly successful. I think we'll try each week to add 10% or so, with the hopes of getting up the sprint distance by May. That way we'll be really comfortable with it by the time we try the real thing.

What else have we been up to? Well, we resumed our curling, so my arms have been a little sore. We put our names on a list to try and get into the spring softball league, but we haven't been able to get in quite yet, so fingers crossed. In the meantime, we registered for skateboarding lessons! That's going to be ridiculous. We'll start those in April. And for the next few weeks, we're finishing up our badminton practicing. We looked at possibly registering for an actual tournament, but I don't think the ones we've found will actually serve our purposes. So we'll probably have to just find a way to play our full matches during one of the normal league nights. I might chat with the organizer to see how we might be able to do it.

I'll check in again in a couple of weeks! Hopefully with some great progress to report.

[shehasfallennn]

trust me, we're better off as friends than lovers.

as a friend, i'm sure you'd see me being a ray of sunshine. you'd say that i'm carefree and funny and caring and fearless and confident, and you would love all those qualities about me. we would smile and laugh about things and life most of the time. maybe sometimes, we would talk about the people we don't like and those who have hurt us, and probably make theories on why they treated us that way. and eventually, we'd feel closer to each other more than ever that you'll start to wonder, “how would it feel like to have a romantic relationship with her?”

and that's where the tricky part comes in.

once we're in it, you'll see i'm not ALWAYS fun. that instead of greeting you “good morning” with a grin on my face everytime, there will be mornings when i get up grumpily and you can't do anything about it but just let me be. you'll find out that on times when you won't be able to send me messages or updates, i have already thought of hundreds of reasons why you're not around—“is he really that busy?” “is he really serious about me?” “what if there's someone else?” “is this relationship not one of his priorities? then why are we in a relationship in the first place?”—you will learn that i overthink a lot about things. and that i require so much reassurance that will probably wear you out at the end of the day. you will get tired of answering all my random questions and passing the mind games and tests i will pull off at any moment i think of it. you will get sick of hearing me say “i'm okay” whenever you ask me how i'm doing if i feel like you aren't really listening. you will be frustrated when i go silent mode on you whenever you've said something that hurt me or did things i don't like, because i don't wanna say hurtful words at the peak of my emotions that i might just regret in the end. i could give you a never-ending list on how i'm too hot for you to hold. i never want that for us. i don't want us to tiptoe around each other nor break each other's hearts in the end and exist as if we've never been in each other's lives before all the hurt and hatred and trauma.

so trust me when i say we're better off as friends than lovers.

Rie Jules

[the-firebird69]

Several other things are happening this guy Trump is beginning to be a pain in the ass again already so we're going after him it's like 420 executive orders more to block everybody's getting up to do it

--couple other things this guy is an a****** and I mean it he's instigating people we would make this beer yeah if we could but is it our face all the time he says okay it's fine it's a really strange beer to make and people see him blocking it wonder what kind of crap is on even though he has the ski ball club big deal sit around the same people talking about it

--so we're going to get into this and try and make this Brew cuz it sounds like a lot of fun and I'll tell you what I'm tired of these assholes this is going to be fun and a good time we have a lot of breweries and he says we can combine small ones and some good idea and higher local and we have a mixed board and it wouldn't be a public company and they wouldn't know how much of it they run and we would be running it but yeah we'd have to do some stealthy stuff and that's the thing we'd be selling more beer than them and they would be selling it for us advertising and they say don't care and they really probably shouldn't and that's how they do business anyways so they can't get away with it because the max keep on running on them so that we would be attracting back proper

Thor Freya

It's funny is it saying the setting them up and he says really it's kind of a similar idea okay and you think it's a good idea and to use the soda places to bottle it's weird but it doesn't make a damn difference and it's clever it'll take no time all the bottles in there and you clean it and wham it's all done

I'm up for this I think I'd kind of sponsored if I could and it would go after our bunkers though yeah that's a bad idea it's cuz of what they're doing it's not their fault really isn't when he says we'll see if they do it

Mac Daddy yeah we're going to try and block this one

So you see it's really their idea the Macklemore lock is it going to sit around and not do it and we have to assemble this brewery and a small breweries probably a million square feet and you need like 10 of them and he's makes like this consortium and he says you can make the Brew in like a few different locations by these warring parties and they need to each have their own for their area it's a good idea he was thinking about before we work too that's the same recipe and instructions and then they have a soda plates down the road and that would work in the upper Midwest and they have defunct beer places and they have different areas and maybe working on this together but against each other now we don't think they'll do this it's a bit aggressive and they knew that he would use a different name and it would be brewsky so they'll have to do it themselves too much for him... And it's on to beirdose it's close to the word it's he's not saying the real word but that's the name of the beer and his can of beer in German and really it's kind of cool and it's kind of a warlock thing from Germany and Brian gets that one and they're hitting us off in the past again so we're not going to be able to do it.

So he says okay we'll make our senior car Cena car which is not really the same and stamp out the body and sell just the body for a Corvette no the old Camaro and the old firebird those are made all the way in 2007 yes and there's a bunch of them no they're not in the garage yeah they broke that's why he wants to use it and move on to the C5 cuz I'll see it's a it's a dog it kind of go 180 you put this body on it with some modification and it will go about 390 miles per hour easily so we're going to test it it's a good idea just to make the body too and he might try and take a crack at it

Thor Freya

I like this idea cuz he took it but it wouldn't be his and it wouldn't look the same it looks similar I'm going to work on it

Savage I like those too he's asking me but no I was having him and I want to do it and then he loves it he wants it done he gets picked on and pushed around he wants someone to do something we would have a front and we would be doing it too and there's no way they can make that many but they'll never know they're just dumb

I want to be part of it do you want to be in on it he wants me in on it I say we can make a C1 and a C2 and he says it's a mega car and so they have a classification for it but it's the same thing and it does look similar to be lower it'll be really hot looking and massively fast and he says yeah the mustang and the Camaro and would probably start with older models and they're really fast no they're slow but they're really powerful we have some estimates to go 420 to 580 the other ones would probably go faster and it's way too fast but yeah and we might try his stamp idea out of metal and stamp out a whole bunch and we need these and we need them in the Midwest and we need them to eat perimeter we need them in the perimeter and we can stamp them out of the special plastic or mold them and we could stamp them out of metal and we should have a competition he says and see if it comes out right and using their methods and the plastic and see which one works better and which one is more feasible he says probably the plastic since it's such a pain in the ass with the stamp we can stamp in like a subframe and attach everything to it would be nice and people would like it but that's kind of more advanced than they can bear maybe he says they're going to be making fly cars and they're going to want to use ours and that would make a fly car with the reinforcing

Darth maul Darth talen we did it back then with father and mother's ideas and our design some of them and the guys and we went after it and if it's our physical stuff we're going to go after much harder

I want to see this happen now in The intercept stuff and they're saying they send it out stacked and just tons of them so we need to do this but they probably won't get it going for a while cuz we just pestering everybody

Mac Daddy

Olympus

[akehoshimystar]

Chapter 9

As that pair of dark eyes was glaring at me, a deep sadness slowly seeped into my heart.

Mao: (.…..Mari-san. What a shame.) (This game is your loss.) If you had played "Find me!", you would have had a chance to find out her true intention. Searching all over the house will get you nowhere so long as you haven’t realized it yourself. Kazuki: What the hell…? Mao: The son's doodles in crayon. The stickers on the closet. The first portrait he drew of his mother. The shoes he wore at the entrance ceremony. His test paper… Did you find all of the above? Kazuki: .…..Duh. Picture, club uniform, etc… All those pointless stuff.….. Where did she dig those things up anyway? Mao: There were all there because Mari-san find them valuable. That’s all there is to it. Kazuki: Valuable? Mao: She had been waiting for you to come back. Kazuki: ! Mao: From what I've heard, even if you were able to meet again, it seems like you two weren't able to make up before she passed away. Poor thing. Kazuki: …If we'd made up, would the jewel have become mine without any problem? Mao: …………….

I had no words left. Mari-san, how idiotic of you. Before you die. While you're still alive. Instead of playing this game and making all the roundabouts, you should have just given this idiot a nice slap in the face and reminded him how moronic he is. You could have just contacted me and asked for my help. But I guess you couldn't. Mischievous, bold, and stubborn. Along with those qualities, you were a loving and kind person, but in reality, you were also a coward.

Mao: (…I really wanted to play chess with her one last time.)

As that thought circled around my head, I suddenly notice Soneto Kazuki's face and felt something was off. He was holding his head like a lost child.

Kazuki: ………………Did she… actually make it? No, but…. Mao: What do you mean by that? She's already dead. Kazuki: ………… No way. Mao: Excuse me? Kazuki: Maybe she…. is still alive. Mao: ………………Whatever on earth are you talking about? Kazuki: It's true that her health has been deteriorating lately and has been hospitalized for a while. So I told you guys she had passed away so that I could receive condolence money as soon as possible. Even the doctor said she didn’t have much time left!

His expression changed so much that it made my heart ache.

Mao: So you think she’s “probably” alive? Kazuki: It’s that hag’s fault… If only she told me where the jewel is… She’s as good as dead anyway! So I just considered it a miscalculation!

Mao: You…. What did you do to Mari-san? Kazuki: I swear I never once thought of killing her! I’m serious! Y-You see…. It's a waste of time to rush the process of someone who's going to die anyway! It’s just that… I've got debts and I want money fast… I didn't do anything. She just collapsed on her own this morning… so by now, she should… Mao: ……….! I’ve heard enough. Take me to Mari-san right now. Kazuki: ……Shut your trap! She's gonna sleep in the coffin soon anyway!! More importantly, give me the damn jewel already! That’s the only thing that can get me out of the rock bottom!!

Soneto Kazuki put his hand in the pocket and a sharp, shining blade came into my sight.

Mao: At this point, all you ever talk about is still money? So foolishly shallow beyond repair that I could vomit right at this instant. If Mari-san won’t say it, allow me to have the honor of drilling this into your skull. I know a few words that clearly define you, an incorrigible piece of trash. Kazuki: Y-You son of a-!!

Just when Soneto Kazuki raised his knife above his head….

Kazuki: Ugh…..

Tomose: ………

Tomose came out of the hidden door without making any sound and tightened his arms around Soneto Kazuki's neck from behind.

Kazuki: Arghhhh….

Tomose didn’t budge an inch, he continued to hold down his neck as he was unable to do anything but struggle.

Mao: I think that’s enough now. Tomose: If he doesn't stop screaming soon, it will be a nuisance to the other customers. Mao: Yeah, but are you sure you're using the right amount of force? Tomose: Just on the verge of passing out. He’s okay.

When Tomose let go, Soneto Kazuki collapsed on the spot. As he was gasping for air, Tomose binded his hands behind his back, he seems pretty used to it.

Mao: (It really was just a moderate force to keep him obedient.) (He knows what he’s doing. There was no need for me to worry at all.) I’ll ask nicely. Where is Mari-san? Kazuki: Discharged from the hospital in the morning and now… home Mao: Ito, did you hear that? Call an ambulance. Ito: [Understood.]

Once again, I looked down at him, immobilized and lying with no strength left.

Mao: …I said this before. I'm not Mari-san, so I don't understand all of her feelings, and I can't speak for her. But…. I think this game may be the result of someone who was not honest with her feelings thinking desperately about how to get her message across. Kazuki: …..Haaah. Too bad. None of her bullshit got through me at all. Mao: …………I can tell. Unlike games, in reality, happy ending isn’t guaranteed. In fact, there are plenty of them. The endings that leave a bad taste in your mouth. Tomose: ……..

Kyoya: Pardon my intrusion. Would you like some tea? Kazuki: That’s the last thing I need… Just hurry up and report this to the police or whatever… Kyoya: Oh. That's good to hear. You must have done something that deserves to be reported. Kazuki: The hell? Kyoya: Our scaredy-cat staff heard the words "die" and "kill" earlier, so they jumped to conclusion and reported the incident. I was thinking that if the police came, I would have to apologize and politely ask them to leave. Thank you very much for saving me a lot of trouble.

A little after Kyoya-san’s words, Soneto Kazuki's breathing went from slowly to roughly. Shortly after, a scream could be heard. A message card that was once in the pocket rolled and fell out.

Chapter 10

[marinesocks]

writeblr intro!!

hi hi!! i'm helena/danger (she/her) and i'm new to tumblr but i saw a bunch of people doing writeblr introductions and wanted to join in!! i'm a bit shy when it comes to reaching out but if you interact with me at all i will like. 100% respond!!! ok here goes!!

about me

i am a:

adult,

lesbian,

ADD haver,

third culture kid,

hobbyist reader,

psych major,

avid dog enthusiast,

wannabe artist,

horror movie fan,

ecology nerd,

and, as you might have guessed,

a writer!!

i'm not incredible at it but for some reason i cant stop doing it so here i am!!

favorite genres/niches

fantasy mostly!!!

i like to think i like plot but honestly i'll like anything if the characters are good enough

HUGE mythology and folktale fan!! i have very strong opinions on how to incorporate those into a novel tho, so only ask about that if you dare!!

surprise creepy concepts and crapsaccharine worlds are like my favorite of all time. i 100% support lying about the contents of a project to keep that twist extra shocking!!

romcoms might not be my favorite but im a sucker for cute couples, especially if they are LGBTQ+

psychological horror is excellent, one of my favorites (even if i'd never dare to write it)

depictions and representations of mental health is probably the thing that's most consistent throughout my work? maybe its just the psych major talking but i find that stuff endlessly fascinating

i've lived in various places overseas for most of my life, so i enjoy stories set in unique locations absolutely DRENCHED in culture!!

current projects

i feel a bit awkward sharing these because again, i'm not a great writer, but i like reading about other writeblr's projects so i figured i'd give other people the option of seeing mine! warning for pretentious titles for very straightforward and basic concepts

WIP - flowers that mean "we'd miss you" - a short story I wrote while testing out subtext, character dynamics and prose!! the basic run-down is that a boy wakes up in the hospital and now he and his friends have to navigate a very difficult conversation. the subject matter definitely requires a content warning, and it has a few gaps i still need to fill, but overall i really like the direction it's headed!! out of all of these projects, it's probably the one i have the least issues with.

in the ataraxis of aftermath - this one is a novel i wrote for NaNoWriMo 2020! it is post-apocalyptic with elements of fantasy, slice-of-life, and romance, specifically lgbtq+ romance. it's about a girl exploring what remains of her flooded city when she suddenly finds another survivor. despite the genre, this novel is very slow-paced and calm, relying more on the character dynamics and emotional journey of the protagonist instead of traditional story beats and plotlines!! i finished the whole first draft that november (and without any real outline to guide me, so altogether it's a bit of a mess), and i plan on rewriting it after i finish the two following projects!!

WIP - the owl's wish - originally intended as a short story for just a friend and i, this project is quickly expanding into a full-on novel!! it's a haikyuu!! fanfic, but i've been told that the story is well enough removed from the show that it can work even if you don't that context. the only summary i can give without spoilers is that it's about an owl spirit with amnesia who finds a friend, and together they set off to get their wishes granted by the mysterious Lady of the Yellow Springs (but it's about more than that, i promise ;) ). it's set in ancient japan, and i referenced a few traditional fairytales when drawing up the outline, but otherwise it's a completely original folktale that can hopefully be accessible to anyone who picks it up!!

WIP - currently titled ouroboros paradox - this is a novel i am currently plotting, so honestly i'm not so sure how much i can say!! this is a fantasy novel coming from my intense passion for large creatures, horror elements, and norse mythology. as far as i know now, the story will follow two protagonists in the city of jörmungandr - one from the past and one in the present - as they try to navigate life, religion and ethics in a world where murdering living beings lengthens your lifespan. i plan on finishing my outline before this november, so i can try to hit 50K for nanowrimo this year!!

where to find me

Instagram, Wattpad, Art Fight, AO3, & Toyhouse! If you would like to read my writing but don't have a Wattpad account, i've linked the google docs directly to the titles :)

and that should be it!! if you read this far imagine i am giving you a very firm handshake with very watery eyes. if you'd like to reach out, ask questions, or share some of your story tidbits with me, please do!! i'd be so happy to reciprocate however you'd like :) have a great day!! drink some water!!!

[6okuto-moved]

(i’m the ushijima x oikawa’s sibling headcanons anon) THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR WRITING MY REQUEST XHSCSHSC i’m crying for laughing so much, i loved everything! this literally made my day thank you T^T oikawa is so chaotic i love him and ushijima is a softy for is s/o i know ;; but the best part was this: “ -looks straight into his sibling's eyes and says "at least it isn't tobio. i would have disowned you, you know?" ” because that would be an even more hilarious situation and now i want some headcanons with his sibling with tobio as a boyfriend too👀 just to make him suffer you know? XD (#freeoikawa lol) obviously only if you like this kind of content! thank you so much again💕

— oikawa with a sibling dating kageyama

HEESSJDH I'M GLAD U ENJOYED!!! and merry christmas to oikawa tooru i'm making your life a drama! sorry this took a hot minute help... christmas eve moment

it makes sense that they'd know kageyama since he was on oikawa's team, plus his sibling would be in kageyama's grade

they probably kept in contact after junior high

karasuno vbc found out before seijoh (obviously). i think some of them were scared for kageyama's life. hinata thinks he's about to lose his setter fr

but imagine oikawa finding out by overhearing one of his fangirls of all people talking about it

"did you know his sibling is dating that guy from karasuno? kageyama? how do they handle dating such a big competitor,"

he pauses.. freeze frame.

"what the hell? What the Hell? What The Hell?"

aoba johsai's volleyball club is sent into disaster as their captain oikawa tooru experiences every stage of grief at the same time

everyone watches as he calls his sibling and starts yelling, "HELLO?! Backstabber of a sibling. traitor. you're dating Tobio of all the people in the world?? is this an elaborate prank? do you hate me? i'm making you sleep on the couch i don't care if you have your own room-"

tooru starts spitting out every possible embarrassing moment and fact about kageyama he has. insulting him with no coherence

"you want to date that guy? i know all of his weaknesses. i hit him in the head once. he didn't even move. you deserve someone with faster reflexes, who has better emotional intelligence than a caterpillar. have you had a conversation with him ever? his head is empty. and you know he goes to a vending machine to buy milk, right? milk? is that not embarrassing enough for you—"

tooru is already..the way he is...when he sees kageyama. but the aura this man has the next time he sees him.

tobio shows up at their house to pick up his partner and tooru opens the door instead. "hello, i'm here to pick up your sib-" "stay away from my family." "but we're...dating?" "STAY AWAY FROM MY FAMILY"

he has to be physically dragged away from the door

he thinks he might cry when he comes home to kageyama on the couch. literally might burst into tears while punching the air

"iwa hear me out. i could shave his head. or do i bleach it? would he look bad blond? they wouldn't want to be with blond tobio, right?"

oikawa texting the third year gc whenever kageyama is around. "911 the enemy is IN MY HOUSE" "oikawa shut the hell up" / "how many years in prison is knocking a minor out cold with a frying pan" "what is wrong with you"

he sees them kiss once and oikawa starts gagging and iwaizumi has to stop him from setting a ball straight at kageyama's head. he cannot catch a break ever.

neither can kageyama

oikawa is grilling and testing this guy because if he's going to date his little sibling "he has to prove himself." birthday, favourite food, when they met, when they started going out, his english skills for some reason, etc. etc.

anytime kageyama is over oikawa blatantly ignores him at first

"sweet sibling of mine, would you like some snacks?" "yeah we'd love some—" "Who is We?"

oikawa challenging kageyama to a volleyball drills over the dumbest things just to separate them..help. "Tobio. the loser has to do our dishes. deal or no deal" "tooru those are literally your chores"

after the first couple of times they decide to just,, not hang out at oikawa's house if he might be home

honestly it doesn't take long for his sibling to bring it up themself. he does like when people are direct about their feelings

"can't you just let me date him in peace, tooru? i'm going to date him whether you want me to or not, so even if you can't support me i'd appreciate it if you would at least stop bullying him everytime he's around. if not for him, for me."

oikawa k.o.

similar to his reponse to them dating ushijima,, he forces himself to tone it down (he's glaring in silence)

he makes a pact. a peace treaty, if you will. no harassing tobio (moreso than he did before they were dating) = no pda around him

still. if they're gonna keep dating he's going to try to find silver lining like "hey hey, do you have any embarrassing photos of tobio? can you send them to me? i want a folder for humiliation,"

his sibling dating kageyama ends up being like his exposure therapy HELPSEMD /hj

at some point he watches the door for kageyama and opens it before he reaches the doorbell so they can talk alone

glares at him with his arms crossed and says "tobio, volleyball aside, i don't like you. so help me god if you ever, ever, hurt my sibling i will hunt you down. i Know Where Your School Is."

kageyama takes this so seriously . answers like he's facing a coach and kind of stutters out an Of Course, while standing super straight

he's trying his best

they walk back in like it didn't happen and tooru puts his arm over tobio's shoulder and yells "your stupid boyfriend is here!"

you know the scene where kageyama asks him for advice and tooru makes his nephew take a photo of him bowing? he has so many of those now but he never gets sick of them.

"you want ideas for what to get for their birthday? not my problem. unless..."

if there's a karasuno v seijoh match.. rip his sibling fr no choice but to be wearing the seijoh colours